#fuck it throw away the whole month

[quick-catton]

you're telling me. BOTH of these fuckers were at the BAFTAs tonight. and we didn't get a single clip of callum manhandling barry....

#this week is actually cancelled #fuck it throw away the whole month #IF BARRY ISNT MAKING TALL MEN GIGGLE WHATS EVEN THE POINT #actually rocking in a corner head in hands rn #this would have fixed me i'm so serious #no jarry no... carry(?) #no curtbucky fix-it pics #it's so over for us #barry keoghan #callum turner

[crazycoven]

is this too sappy for them? who cares

doodles for zosantober, prompt: promises

#throws this on the dash and runs away #one piece #zosan #zs #zosantober #my ass was gonna do the whole month lmao could hardly get week 1 done #love sanji not being able to kiss zoro good shit #the last one is supposed to be them reuniting after the time skip I got so fucking lazy #roronoa zoro #black leg sanji #sanji #hayden draws #my art

[anurarana]

My frustration with Jason Peter Todd is that there is a universe out there where he was given a decades-long character arc; one where he could learn from his mistakes, and make amends where necessary, all the while still acknowledging the pain both caused by himself, his actions, his decisions, as well as the flipside, the harm he has personally lived through intentional or not.

This is a character that will always have his motives and ideology shaped by the trauma he lived through and died for, but the way it feels like current comics interact with that trauma is just one big bad event that everyone else has gotten over and yet he is never allowed to move on from. All he is ever allowed to be is the self-proclaimed black sheep, the one who died, but he's not able to deconstruct what all that meant for him, his morals and foundational beliefs as a character, because we had to shove it all aside way to quickly to make room for big happy bat family.

His entire existence feels like it is there to either serve as a punchline or surface level angst when needed. No one knows what to do with Jason anymore because they never gave him the space for real character growth when it was necessary.

I feel like I'm always like haha yeah Jason Todd, I wish he was worse. I wish he was in more pain. I wish he was alone, and he hated everyone again and vise versa. But it's more that I find his personal morals and ethics fascinating, I just wish they were properly fleshed out and given the time and consideration to evolve and expand along with his growth as a person. I want him to be wrong. I want him to fuck up, and fuck up again. His passion is what makes him interesting!!

I also want him to learn and grow into his skin without throwing away everything he stands for. That he could actually become a solid argument to the status quo that mainline comics can find themselves falling into, one that you get the sense he was originally brought back to be. But instead, he's the angry one that is insane and kills people, or swing way too hard in the opposite end, and all of his claws have been filed off— he's just a sad boy with no real poignant internal dilemmas anymore.

Idk, maybe I like the idea of a guy being able to heal over time. Maybe the idea that you are doomed to relive the mistakes of the past forever is exhausting. But what we have right now is so boring and lame that I'm out here advocating for them to just kill him off again.

#idk how to fix what we have now I think we just gotta throw the whole man away #it feels like he's just there to whine and be edgy and stand for nothing #I love jason 😭 I just want him to mean something can we let him not suck please and thanks ughh #anyways lets to back to me not caring about comics for a few months again #jason todd #batman #I wrote way too much here it is 3am if this is illegible oh well #this isn't just a jason problem too I'm the number 1 batfam hater I feel like it fucked them all up #I just unfortunately got diagnosed with jtodd brain rot when I was 10 and now I am forced to live like this

[lesbiansanemi]

I am so fucking sick of living with my roommate and his fuck ass boyfriend. Also watching my roommate burn every single one of his (already rather minimal, I might add) bridges for this guy is also kind of painful but also his relationship with me is one of said bridges so I'm almost past the point of even feeling bad for him lmao

#i have had to piss for probably the better part of an hour now #because they decided to take a shower together and have been in there for well OVER an hour now #and this is a nightly occurence atp sometimes MULTIPLE times a day #we have one bathroom.... can yall not be considerate enough to not be in there for up to TWO HOURS AT A TIME??? #also it's such a waste of fucking water.... #idk we've hit a point where i literally hear the bf doing anything and i get pissed off #but also tell me why i'm sitting in my room (which shares a wall with the bathroom) and i can hear this man hacking and spitting shit up #and this is also something that happens multiple times a day #like.... dude.... why are you spitting up toothpaste so fucking loudly oh my fucking god #but yeah no i'm like my roommate's only friend atp and he's about to not have me lmao like we're about to reach #'i'm cutting you off when i move out' levels of me being pissed off with this whole situation type shit #and apparently the bf convinced him to come out to his family which his mom was chill which is good #his dad's side of the family though....? not great. and my roommate KNEW that would be the case cuz we'd talked about it before #also love that my roommate has constantly talked about moving out of the city we live in because he hates and also there's no good career #opportunities for him here (which is true) #and now. MAGICALLY. he's like 'idk i think it'd be best for me to stay here' #like oh my GOD???? are you hearing yourself???? are you fucking stupid???? you fucking hate it here??? #but sure throw your life away and ruin all your meaningful relationships for a guy you met six months ago jfc #and the thing is i *know* my roommate we've been close CLOSE friends for nearly a decade now #i know he is not like this.... like yeah he's being insane by allowing this but also i know these aren't the kinds of decisions he would ma #and also i know he wouldn't treat me like this all on his own #it's the deranged fucking control freak of a guy he decided to date and my roommate has too many of his own issues to put his foot down #about certain things and tell the guy no so he's just allowing him to completely take over his life #and fuck everything up until the bf is the only thing he has left once it's all said and done #and yeah. it's painful to watch. but also wtf am i supposed to do because obviously my opinion is not respected nor wanted regarding this #that has been made PAINFULLY clear #ugh this is so fucking horrendous #what is it with ppl who start to date someone and then go clinically fucking insane and destroy their lives all for this one person #who. realistically. they barely know in comparison to all the other ppl in their life #like explain it to me jfc

[rox-of-iu]

me + mayhem going on a stupid silly hike for my stupid silly mental health

touched grass and i am normal again (lying)

#i will get back to drawing soon let me just sleep for a few years shdjhkfds #anyway photo credit to mayhem again i cant take pictures to save my life lol #btw the caption is obvs reference to that one hike video tiktok i think so credit to that also its not my joke #anywqay it was nice did help me a little bit #been feeling a bit down due to some personal problems ykno #and also due to not being accepted into a med uni I rly wanted to (but didn't put enough effort I'll confess) and that almost no one getsin #but i was only missing one point o(-( i was the first in line outside the capacity limit hasjkdhsahd #even tho my brain is rly small for it lets be real hfjsdfhksd but like hhsdjhshdjkhd those biches at physiotherapy baited me hdsjd #mqf i have failed you lol #also i have accidentaly gotten back into one piece as I do for like two weeks periodically every few months or so dhjsdhk #so im revisiting my olde blorbo trafalgar which is just reminding me of a fact that this was one of the fuckers my itty bitty young self - #- wanted to pursue medicine beacause of lmaoooo #bad timing one piece fixation!! bad bad!! sdhhdjshdjakshd #whatevrrr whatevr whatevr io dotn care! enough of that hahhskj #but hey as some of u may remeber im czech so haa whats up with the mountains right since we are very cute and 'down to earth' state hahaha #its cuz its actually from austria :)) #we went hiking there since theyre co by kamenem dohodil as they say #fuck english has the exactly same saying im moron that ruins my whole thing hjdsk 'a stone's throw away' whatever ignore that ig hahhah #so yeah very beautiful very powerful go touch some grass lads #also they are not stones throw away i was lying but close enough- #also random czechs stop jumpscaring me in other countries challenge why was there so many of us horrible horrible horrible

[permanentreverie]

so i may be moving in the next few weeks 😵‍💫

#there’s this girl looking for a roommate in this town an hour away #and i just texted her and we’re gonna meet up this week to talk it over #i’m so NERVOUS fuck. #but it is absolutely time to move on! #it’s not healthy living with my mom anymore i need to not Be Here #i also might have a job opportunity in ***** so moving there makes sense #even if it’s just for a few months #cause i’m going to apply to university!!!!!!!!!! that whole process is So Daunting yall are so brave #how do you guys function in the transition period without throwing up every hour??? #ofc this might fall through. if it does i think ill just pursue moving to the city that im applying for university in #since i have family there i could rent from #but yep! get me out of this house! #lindsay posts

[confinesofmy]

me and my cousin i'm barely on speaking terms with (but in a relatively casual way) repotted her deceased grandmother's pothos today. this was our first time actually properly repotting it bc last summer it was in such a fragile state and we were so scared to hurt it that we just lifted it out of its pot and placed it in a bigger one but this go round we basically dismantled it entirely. we got eight discrete plants and placed it into four different pots!! in nine months it went from the edge of death to that many plants and like ninety leaves altogether. so if you're bad with plants but still wanna fool with them, i guess you should get a pothos.

#neither of us are corny enough to say it or interested in tearjerker moments but i think we both felt the presence of her grandmother HEAVY #this was the only potted plant of hers still living since she died back in 16 & it was. god. it was no longer variegated from lack of light #it actually had more leaves than i remembered. it had like 20. but for every leaf there were 4 places there should've been and wasn't. #water that touched the soil came back yellow which i've never researched to see what the cause is #but i associate it with like. bogs. and stagnation #like if it was still in that dark corner of my other cousin's living room it fr might be dead now #but in nine months thanks to my other cousin asking for help and thanks to us repotting it and taking our turns with it #it has more than quadrupled in size and is variegated af #i don't know what we'll do in like six months when it wants to do it again... #i'm keeping mine somewhat contained tbh i don't even like pothos i just love it bc it's a piece of my aunt #and it is like objectively so fucking sweet that we've rehabbed it like that #adam yaps #like two weeks ago i asked my other cousin if she'd want a pot of it when we repotted and she once again emphasised #that she didn't want it or any cuttings off it leaving the family or being handed out willy nilly #and i once again tried to explain that it's a pothos. it wants to be split up and thrown all over. #that's a pothos' favourite thing #plus her mom probably gave an ungodly amount of people cuttings off it like come on now #but anyway maybe she'll understand now when she sees and fully comprehends that in 9mos we turned half a plant into 4 #at this rate we'll either be giving bits away or throwing bits away. those are the options we will eventually face. #because you can't just repot infinitely. eventually your whole house will be one massive pothos in a hundred pots.

[viiisenyas]

If my brain disrupts my plot with a new idea that changes the entire story ONE MORE TIME

#this is why i cannot finish my asoiaf fic #i had to change the plot like 10 times and I’m not even joking #first it started out with a Robb ship but I didn’t like the chemistry (or lack thereof) with my oc #then it became a Jon ship #ok fine they have a cute thing going #not a big deal #i can keep Jonny boy from joining the NW because all the adults failed him in canon #And he gets to marry into a relatively wealthy House that’s pretty much one person away from going extinct #okay cool #and here’s where it gets really interesting 🧍🏽‍♀️my brain wants me to obliterate 40k words and get rid of the arranged marriage arc #WHICH I SPENT MONTHS ON #and just make it a whole ass forbidden romance thing #where Jon ends up becoming my oc’s household guard since she did actually offer to talk to her dad about it in *checks notes* chapter 5 #and now I feel obligated to do it because I’m a SAP for forbidden romances and jsjddhhfjdjffj #I WAS ALMOST DONE WITH THE FIRST INSTALMENT OF THIS LONGFIC 😭 #not that I was gonna publish it or anything but still #MONTHS #I’m gonna throw a fucking chair #i’m losing my mind #writing commentary #dumb ramblings #so anyways how are y’all tonight? 😅

[ghostzzy]

googles ‘how to stop feeling guilty all the time about everything’

#everywhere i turn i feel like i'm failing someone or myself #and every problem that arises out of oversight or neglect (which is a lot of them due to My Whole Deal) feels so huge and complicated. #like. my psychiatrist office sent me an email that if i dont make a followup appt by the end of the week they'll throw my file away. #the hospital from last summer is still sending me bills despite having paid them over 3k at the time #because my insurance is retroactively deciding not to cover things. #and now i've got debt collectors on my ass. #i need to order some things that will Help Me like a mini fridge and light sensitivity glasses #but i burned through so much money already this month and i don't know how to pick good objects so i Haven't. #i haven't called my grandma despite knowing she's going through hell with my grandpa still in rehab #because i haven't felt up to talking. #i don't see my brothers enough. i don't spend enough time with mishka. i don't spend enough time outside. #i don't read enough. i don't clean enough. i don't cook enough. #all because i am Tired. and Ill. and i have to Work for 8 hours a day. #uuruurgghhhhhh. i know if you do things they become done. but i am so overwhelmed and it'd be easier to just lay in the dark til i die. #chronic fatigue is a fucking nightmare from which i can never wake. it's not fucking fair. #izzy.txt

[carryonmylovelies]

omg hey hotties 😭😭 im back !

#sooooooooooooo anyways not me dropping off the face of the earth for like the entire summer vwkqmqjdhsowjwjwjenkwhwk #just had to die for a little bit u know....disappear into the abyss and all that #pls look away from all the shit im abt to throw into these tags 😁 unless u want 2 read my cringe oversharing essay for the day 👍 #my summer was so silly 😍 ummmmm lets see i lost my fulltime job at the daycare bc the owner very rightfully decided to retire and close #so i was unemployed for the whole summer except for my occasional side jobs and also had to move bc of family shit #so im living w my grandma for the time being and its utterly amazing tbh my grandma and i have a really strong bond and relationship #and i really love getting to come home and see her every day. i decorated her house for halloween a week ago 🎃🎃🎃 #and she couldnt stop talking abt how nice everything looked and how glad she was to have me there and i just abt broke down 😭😭😭 #i did a complete fucking 180 jobwise im actually training to be a certified fire alarm inspector now LMFAO #i really really like it so far and have like a million stories already abt all the shit ive done/seen so far #im the only girl looking son of a bitch thats working and training in the field out of my entire region of the company so 🤪 #literally shoved my dykey nb ass in there and now im fucking it up with the boys heyoooooo #ummm me and one of my best friends started dating bc of a miscommunication (BC OFC WE DID I KNOW I KNOW ITS SO MF GAY) #and our 4 mo anniversary will be on halloween which i think is the swaggiest fag shit in the whole WORLLLDDDDDDDD 😫🎃🖤🧡 #my very beloved pet rabbit of over 8 years died quite unexpectedly in august and i was. doing pretty bad for awhile which sucked so so hard #he had multiple health issues and was over 10 yrs old so its hard to say what exactly happened. my gf and gma both pulled me thru that shit #and my besties gave me so much support and love idek what i would have done w/o them. i miss my baby so bad. #ive also had some health issues which sucks absolute BALLS #and recently figured out that the migraine/anti depressant meds ive been on for the last THREE MF YEARS have been fucking up my body lmao #but on the flipside going back 2 the positives i got to have some really incredible experiences/interactions in the past few months #and those were really huge in helping me get my shit together again #i got to take my girlboygirlfriend on little daytrips throughout the summer. i got a second tat🕷🕸❣️ (which my gf designed 😫) #i met girl queen pussy slay miss felicia day AND met the sexiest creature alive harvey guillen and he told me he liked my hair #which im still super duper normal over i can assure u 😁👍 definitely didnt alter my brain chemistry or anything #i saw gods greatest and most valuable gift to this planet on monday (mcr concert) #and had my entire mind body heart and soul so thouroughly fucked up that im still peeing my goddamn pants over it #and of course now its october :) my rotting flesh and sickened brain knows peace once more #bouta go eat up some drawtober posts right the fuck now so prepare yourselves 👁👁 also gonna be making a post on the coc blog soon as well #its already that time of year again mwhahahahahahahahahaha #so yeah 😋 my summer was goofy and silly as hell. i hope u all have been doing okay and im so happy 2 be back pls hmu if u wanna chat !!!

[coastalroses]

how does one deal with people leaving. genuinely i don’t know how i’m going to function when these people leave

#cass rambles #it’s six months away and i want to throw up when i think about it #:( #i’m overly sentimental i know but goddamn #i’ve known these people for my whole life #and then they just won’t be there #and how the fuck am i supposed to deal with that #my heart hurts

[fabulouslygaybean]

god. if my mom tries to paint our house fire as some kind of fucking blessing one more time im gonna kill someone

#it was not a blessing. it was not a miracle and it wasn't a sign from the universe. #it was a horrible fucking thing that happened bc my mom decided to buy a heater light off of wish that malfunctioned. #it destroyed my room. i had to throw away almost everything from my childhood bc of it. i had health issues for months following the event. #i got lasting trauma and breathing issues and that's about all i gained throughout the whole thing. #that and like... a red room i guess. that was kinda cool to be able to choose a new color for my new bedroom walls #but literally it was not a sign of anything. it was a horrible event caused by a shitty decision.

[unicarcass]

"we got tuna" moodboard

#i could cry fr #but like in a good way not in the upset way like last month when we had to throw it away the first time #it suuuucked we were fuckin excited #:( our mom got it for us too like #we caved and asked for grocery help bc we were doing so fucking bad during our manic ep so we felt double guilty bc #food waste + wasting someone elses money. those tuna bowls arent exactly cheap blah blah blah........ #that was the day all that shit hit the fan it was our first hospital visit out of this whole clusterfuck ugh #just feels nice to finally be able to sit down n eat our tuna #zero.txt

[ghostickle]

I really be cursed for everyone I meet to just end up using me huh

#I live the next town over from a college town #that’s like. everyone fucking hates the college kids #especially cause this particular school it’s all just assholes with rich parents #unfortunately for me it’s also full of cool looking alt people who keep fucking me over #cause I fall for the crust pants and platforms and cool hair #then suddenly I’m talking them outta suicide every night and basically parenting them #like full on making sure they’re getting food this recent one giving him a place to crash so he didn’t have to live with his ex #driving them around paying for everything despite the fact they’re unemployed and their rich ass parents buy them everything #meanwhile I actually work and am struggling to pay my bills every month #I can’t afford to feed myself but god knows they’re getting everything they could ever want #and still being ungrateful and rude #and I’ll be like hey maybe u should go to a professional yk im not a therapist I can’t help with ur whole suicidal thing #and they get mad at me and throw me away cause oh no they have to work on themselves and take accountability #I’m not gonna keep spoon feeding some fucker who’s gotten life on a silver platter #idk there’s two very different sides to punks I’ve met #there’s either punks who are punk cause they have been through hell and fucked over by the universe and have a genuine understanding of the #beliefs it comes with and the morals #and there’s the punks who maybe sure like the music and the style but have never had to so much as raise their voice to be heard #never had to fight for anything #which isn’t inherently bad I wish I was that lucky #but they’re never really aware of that privilege and just expect to be handed everything #and get pissed if they are expected to be held accountable for being an asshole #ghost rambles

[sylvainlover]

stress posting venting in tags <3

#i submitted my paperwork to take my board exam...and it costs 200 dollars just to like. apply to take the exam. #and i am studying for it rn with these module things my company provided and im like..............I know failure is part of learning but th #fact i am not doing perfect on these modules is making me freak out and i am so scared of failure but like ik its necessary and the whole #point of studying is going into it knowing i dont know everything. like i am learning and its fine but oh my god i am so fucking scared #im also working on moving out of this apartment bc i cant afford to live here anymore and on top of prepping for this exam i am just like. #Fuck Fuck Fuck!!!!! Like Fuck!!!!!! #Weekends are not enough for decompression i havent decompressed at all i am constantly like freaking out and anxious and feel like #im going ot like die. and i dont know how to stop studying or working or just like. lying in bed ruminating #i want to relax but i just like cant. i havent relaxed or felt calm in months i just feel like i am panicking and nothing else and its like #my baseline now. so. Hooray ^_^ #and everyone is like oh if u fail just take it again!!! i dont have an extra fucking 200 dollars to just throw away all the time lmaooooooo #anyway yeah this sucks ass. i want to die x

[neverendingford]

.

#tag talk #I made three new earrings. I've wanted to turn pennies into earrings for a while and I bought a small grinder wheel attachment last month #and I finally felt like making them. two are a silver wire pair for my sister and one is a blackened wire single for me #I refuse to give presents exactly on Christmas but I'm going down there because I care about my sister even if I don't about my parents #and she cares a lot about Christmas so I'm glad I made her something. she's one of the only people I feel comfortable giving gifts to tbh #anyway I'm not posting pictures because I don't feel like it and idk. I don't feel like posting on tumblr for real. #but I still wanna say the words into the void yaknow? #first new earring design I've made since march/april since my lantern earring #I've had even more people asking whether I sell them and like. no I don't. I don't want to make them for people I don't know or care about #I'm not about to mass produce my passion projects that help me express my identity. that would be honestly really fucked up. #like. yeah this lantern design I thought of while sitting next to a nice trans girl who made me feel okay to be myself. #let me just make fifty of it. this earring that I created at my point of recovering from almost bleeding to death. let me mass produce it #this shell earring that I made sitting with my boyfriend in the park on a windy october day. let me make it until I hate it. #this spiral shell earring that I made from a shell my cousin found while we wandered the wash the year he stayed for three whole months #no. everything is memories. everything is a part of me. everything I make because I love it. if I don't love it I throw it away. #I'm not going to mass produce these. I'm not going to sell them online for fucking... for fucking money. #like.. what should I do? be like “yeah I sat down and made some art for an hour. pay me some cash for it. that feels disgusting to me. #anyway. I made some new earrings and I'm glad because now I've got a good gift for a sibling that genuinely cares. and also for myself #cause I was getting a bit bored of the earrings I've got. I needed a new one for a while