#desire like a monster

[decompforteenz]

rape and nonconsensual touching but it extends into the aftercare.

youre angry at them and scared and flinching and after what they just did to your body you can barely stand on your own but when you can you try to shuffle and crawl away from them. you dont WANT them to bathe you, theyre probably just trying to wash evidence off but youre weak and shaking, you cant really fight them off. they grab you by the crook of your elbow and drag you to your feet, hauling you into the bathroom while you stumble or even drag uselessly behind them. you curse at them half heartedly when they drop you into their shower. you sputter as the water comes on, too cold and unexpected. they set up a chair near where youre sitting and roll up their sleeves, take a handful of your now wet hair and drag you to them. you shake and flinch as they drag you over, hands covering your face like theyre going to hit you. instead they just start to wash your hair. you freeze under the gentle touching, struggle to connect this behavior with everything else thats happened tonight. the water is warm now and theyre cooing at you and telling you you were good, you didnt behave yourself but you still made them feel so good and youre such a good pet, or you will be once they break you a little further. you sit there dumbfounded and humiliated as they talk to you like a child or a scared animal. you dont notice your shoulders relax or how youve started leaning into their hands, but they do. they mutter vague sounds of approval at your submission, the first time youve behaved all fucking night. as soon as they finish with your hair they move to your body, gently lathering you with soap while you try to hide yourself. one smack to one of your bruised wrists is all it takes to get you to stop covering up now. the violence, the violation, the beating, the tears, and now the warm water, the whiplash, the soft touching, the confusion, its all made you so pliant. you dont say anything when they take extra care to wash your holes. you only shoot them a look when they say “good as new, like nothing ever happened.” they turn off the water and wrap you in a soft, fluffy towel. you look shell shocked and they cant help but laugh that now and only now is when you want to disconnect from your body. once it feels safe. they scoop you up and take you back to the bed you were just violated on. talking down to you as they put you in pajamas and bottle feed you water like a sick lamb, first manhandling your limp spacey body into some underwear youve never seen before (did they have that waiting for you? how long have they planned to do this to you), then a tshirt. they chide you when you dont move to help get it on yourself. clicking their tongue and telling you “arms up” like a child. you move sluggishly and hesitantly but do as they say. they put the shirt on you and kiss your head, thanking you for being so good. you feel sick. they maneuver you into their bed finally so that they can hold you to their chest. as you start to drift off in spite of yourself, they whisper “dont even think about running off tonight. you havent seen anything yet.” in your ear

#desire like a monster #corrupting soft things is very #idk. idk #…… #gravekeeper #nonc0n #kidnapping k1nk

[monstersandbrothers]

I saw a post on here a while ago and wish I could find it again but basically it was about how OP doesn’t think wincest is unrequited so much as it is unspoken and I haven’t stopped thinking about it since. because like . Yes. Yes. Y es . i’m pretty much on board with any kind of wincest u present to me, platonic, romantic, familial, unrequited, requited, I’ll take the freaks in any form no notes. But. a version of samdean where they are both AGONIZINGLY in love with each other but believe there is no way the other feels the same OR that they both know exactly how weird they are about each other but are afraid to look at it directly or bring it into the light because the ramifications of doing so are so monumental and it doesn’t really matter anyway because they will never change. Like I’m personally a big fan of “nothing physical happened between them pre-Stanford but whatever WAS between them was so all-consuming and terrifying sam had to get away before it destroyed them both.” But then it destroyed them anyway. and it’s forever just this monster lurking that they know is there and it’s made all the larger because they will never speak of it. they speak around it, they cover for themselves with “he’s my brother” over and over and over he’s my brother. He’s my brother. He’s my BROTHER. but they can never say the words. They can never yank the sickness out. THAT. that. Thaht. DISCUSS

#desire like a monster #thinking about this makes me insane #it’s quite literally the most tragic love story ever told #no one will ever convince me otherwise #also if u know the post I’m speaking of PLEASE TELL ME #spn #supernatural #dean winchester #sam winchester #samdean #gencest #wincest #weirdcest #thoughts #sam and dean

[tofixtheshadows]

So I've been thinking lately about how Mithrun is Kabru's dark mirror (more on that another time- it needs its own post), and I thought it interesting that one of their parallels is that they were both cared for by Milsiril, but in opposite directions. She took Kabru in as her foster after he was orphaned and tried to convince him not to become an adventurer. On the flip side, she helped rehabilitate Mithrun specifically so that he could rejoin the Canaries.

And I kept wondering: why?

For Kabru, obviously she loves him a whole lot- despite any other shortcomings in their relationship, I do believe that.

So I get why she tries to convince him not to go dungeoning, and, failing that, at least prepares him as thoroughly as she can.

But why help Mithrun? She used to hate Mithrun, but after realizing what a secretly twisted person he was, she actually thought of him more positively (oh, Milsiril). So it wasn't as if she held the kind of grudge that might motivate her to make his already-depleted life even more miserable by sending him back to the dungeons. And it wasn't that she felt bad for him either, since she didn't visit Mithrun for the first ~20 years of his recovery.

The Adventurer's Bible says that Utaya was the impetus for Mithrun returning to the Canaries, but Milsiril is the one who made the trip to see him and tell him about it.

Why would Milsiril work so hard to get her old coworker back into fighting fit? Why encourage him to return to such a dangerous lifestyle, when she was the one who chose not to mercy-kill him?

That last panel is such a crazy thing to hint at and then never elaborate on. Without it we could have just thought that Milsiril wanted the Canaries' work to continue without her, even if it seemed out of character. I think some people even assume she's just a natural caretaker as a foster mom and handwave it to include nursing Mithrun too. What could Milsiril's suspicious motives be? What does she gain from Mithrun joining the Canaries that isn't an altruistic desire to see dungeons safely sealed? Feeling a sense of responsibility for the work she left behind isn't an ulterior motive.

My theory is: Milsiril, knowing that Mithrun was empty save for the burning desire to face the demon again, wound him up like a clockwork doll and pointed him back at the dungeons.

Hoping that he'd eliminate the biggest threat to Kabru's life, before it was too late for him.

Milsiril the puppetmaster.

#Dungeon Meshi #Dungeon Meshi meta #Mithrun #Milsiril #Kabru #btw I'm working with the only translations I could find sorry #so keep that in mind #like it just seemed WEIRD to me #that gloomy introverted Milsiril #who left the life of a Canary behind #decided to do this Canary-adjacent work of helping this guy #maybe the queen made her do it because so many people died and they needed more Canaries idk! #but why would anyone pick Milsiril as a life coach? I really think it was her own choice #it's so interesting how we get these hints of a downright sinster Milsiril #I really like the complicated relationship she and Kabru have #struggling to fully humanize him from her elven perspective #but still taking him seriously wrt: his fears over being a monster or his desire to go to a party! #crazy stuff there #everything about Kabru and adjacent to Kabru is insane what a character #musings with Dea

[drawnfamiliarfaces]

Finja x Chase angst? 👀

oh dude their whole "relationship" is basically messed up angst lol (despite me often portraying it as cracky angst)

I mean, we have some good angst in Chase pursuing First not because he 'loves/cares about' him, but because he selfishly desires him for his power/sees him as a challenge to get into his Fallen Warriors army. And First having to be constantly on alert against Chase, especially when he behaves like a charming honorable warrior, hiding that cunning manipulative side of him behind amused 'harmless' smiles. I would imagine its hard for First to not start to care about Chase (he can be very charming ;) ) to some degree, so there is like this delicious angst in starting to care about someone with whom morally you would never agree with. (very Prof. X vs Magneto vibe imho)

(this also could lead to some interesting spin-off angst opportunity about First being in the Fallen Warriors Army and just...existing in this weird limbo of being a target of Chase's favorable attention, but still essentially being a servant to his Master so thus really unable to trully care about/love this evil man but he still kinda cares after all these years and, like ooooooh baby thats some scrumptious angst possibility)

Or we can have some angst in form of First, being technically 'moved on'/left only in spirit in this world and Chase, still obsessing over him all these centuries, not even realizing that he is basically pining at this point. Showing up to bother current Ninjas, Ninjanomicon and Spirit of First at every opportunity, but not being able to actually be (in any capacity) with First, besides those very brief reunions. And First, throughout the years, while still being very annoyed about Chase's continuoes presence, also feels... incredibly saddened about this man to some degree. But he still can not falter, for his duty and successors still need him and they take priority, so this weird relationship just continues on.

And like OOOOH BABIES this is just scratching the surface of any possible angst, but these are the ones that are currently circling in my mind (i want to make some comics with these scenarious) so yeah! angst! ;D

#ninja showdown #my immortal soul #first ninja x chase young #rc9gn first ninja #first ninja #chase young #i dunno if it is obvious but i really headcanon that since Chase drunk the soup/sold his soul for immortality and power he is INCAPABLE of #true geniune unselfish sort of love. oh he can desire/want/care to some degree/ and certainly selfishly want to possess someone but love??? #nah fam. this dragon man lost that ability. he probably remembers how to tho. and sometimes that shows with some people. like Omi.or First; #and First in turn. while putting duty first (hah) could really start to care about Chase if exposed to him enough but there would be this #voice in his brain that constantly reminds him what Chase really is and how could he care about a monster like this when a similar monster #took his family away?haven't he dedicated his life to defeating monsters?what sort of honor will he have left if he starts to care for evil #gosh all these rants make me want to be a better writer so i could write a fic *cries* #but i shall try to make some comics. i haven't lied i have some ideas for all 3 scenarios i mentioned here >>>;D

[yangsejongs]

people willfully misunderstanding the whole point of cho yeong’s arc was not to return to who she was but to grow and find a purpose in life that she chose for herself

#alchemy of souls #she was never going to become a sword-wielding man-hunting assassin again because it was not by choice it was fed to her by jin mu #she left behind the desire to regain her powers because she no longer needed them for the life she wanted to live with jang wook #in the end she got a happy medium of both---she is chasing monsters AND living alongside jang wook #she learned to live by love and not by survival like...hello this is so important and not you all getting played

[darkmoonravewolf]

Imagine a soft kiss between Marcille and Falin.

Imagine them going, "My Dragon" "My Lord".

Imagine them holding onto each other for fear that the other might disappear or change into something they can't recognize.

#the kit screams! #the kit's manga #dungeon meshi #marcille donato #falin touden #farcille #I feel like more people need to play around with the whole Marcille 'At one point I could make you do whatever I wished #but all I wanted was for you to come back to me' #like she was the dungeon lord at one point. she must still have these weird desire to control the monsters and dungeon #she must still want to have Falin at her beck and call and you just know that Falin would do anything for her #sorry my mind wandered. I can't draw them kissing how I wanted so I'm just venting

[ilovemesomevincentprice]

Vincent Price as Roderick Usher

The Fall of the House of Usher (1960) dir. Roger Corman

#vincent price #Roderick Usher #the fall of the house of usher #fall of the house of usher #house of usher #edgar allan poe #madness #roger corman #i fucking love this movie #one of my faves #and hes so fucking sexy #omfg #i wanna cure him #he seems like such a sweetheart #yet they make him out to be a monster... #so sexy #fuck #unfffff #i desire him carnally #horror #old horror movies #vintage #movie #actor #handsome #gif #gifs made by me #gif set #bicon #bisexual

[wlw-cryptid]

oh you want me to bring my friends now, hm? pretty girl bodies all soft and flushed with pleasure? pressed together? feeling each other? dripping with so, so much cum?

#i cant believe you came back but i am once again so thankful #ive been rereading the other ask a lot #she speaks #anon #asks #tentacles #i simply want to feel the strength and the tenderness of some big intelligent tentacle monster who soaks in my warmth #maneuvering me however it desires #i do love the idea of the tentacles pooling us all together. thats cute for some reason. piling us closer like kittens #even if it helps its grip or whatever practically #tangent tho. how many friends are yall having who you would casually fuck #bc for me personally theres always been a thick separation between people i am purely friends with #and the people i am or could be interested in romantically #not to say i dont adore my friends w real love or that me and my honey dont have a deep friendship alongside our attraction but #idk i just think about my Friend group n i cant picture having steamy gay sex #my mutuals on the other hand i am looking at you with HUNGER

[eerna]

I just think that............. *gestures wildly to how Harrow experiences attraction* you know??????

#as you could probably tell by my fanart today i am having a Night #this funky repressed nun chose the object of her worship to double as her imaginary gf #she cuddles her she calls her beloved she tries to make a move on her #all completely imaginary of course. she doesn't feel any of that but likes to imagine she can feel it. #the object of her worship is also the death of god the monster he defeated once but couldnt defeat twice who resides in a tom under her home #a tomb harrow herself was conceived at the price of 200 innocent children to keep shut #she is the symbol of harrow's power as a necromancer she is the proof harrow deserves to live even if the price was so horrible #and then there's ianthe who is also a brilliant necromancer. who understands attraction at the level harrow does and uses it against harrow #how the only two times harrow even considered giving in to ianthe was when she was either at the end of her rope and insanely powerless #or when she felt at the top of her game like the powerful necromancer she is supposed to be and somehow isn't anymore #their touching is always threatening and uncomfortable and makes her feel on edge #and then there's gideon who just. has nothing to do with any of that. gideon exists on a completely different level. #she reduces alecto to ''ice lolly bimbo'' and ''big slut'' and ''bullshit dead girlfriend'' without breaking a sweat #she forgives harrow everything. things harrow had no part in and things she had. it doesn't matter she forgives it all #she holds harrow's hand she hugs her she kisses her she is REAL and the FIRST PERSON TO EVER PROPERLY TOUCH HER WITH AFFECTION #and it stuns harrow so much she is incapable of even processing it. she completely shuts down every time. we dont know how she feels aboutit #just. harrow and attraction and desire. holy shit #tlt liveblog

[trek-tracks]

Tired: Bones and Jim dressing up as Dr. Frankenstein and Frankenstein’s Monster for Halloween after Into Darkness because of That Whole Reanimation Thing

Wired: Bones and Jim dressing up as Dr. Frank-N-Furter and Rocky for Halloween after Into Darkness because of That Whole Reanimation Thing

#star trek #leonard mccoy #jim kirk #star trek aos #mckirk #bones mccoy #captain kirk #rocky horror picture show #Rocky horror #Frankenstein #frankenstein’s monster #frank n furter #Rocky #I have no desire for a trek Rocky horror au but you have to admit it would be a good costume #I was in my college’s rhps shadowcast for four years #I feel like I have the damn thing memorized

[decompforteenz]

yall mind if i talk about brat breaking to the point of mild brain damage rq?

#orchid chats #desire like a monster

[fagmegumi]

generally beginning to realize that most people who thirst for the jjk men are doing so incorrectly and for the wrong reasons like just making up a generic archetype of a really cool hot guy from those het smutty self published amazon novels and pretending theyre the jjk dudes. when you can say anything about gege akutami but he gave us such a diverse & fascinating cast of hot dudes who are losers in such specific and different ways but always so devastatingly that none of them get any hole whatsoever

#like gojo is this hot super strong unflappable cool guy but he only had 1 friend who tolerated him bc they were both the most insufferable #guy around and ever since he died he’s been annoying hapless teenagers who cant do anything about his obnoxious presence and thats his #whole social life. #toji is a badass action hero who also in his head has the Action Man backstory of yes i may have been a shitty deadbeat dad… but i did it… #to Protect My Family😤 but his legacy is that megumi doesn’t remember or think about his and when he does its ‘oh yea that loser’ and also #as previously mentioned his only employable skill is Can Cut Down Big Monsters; Fast and he looks like he uses dish soap on his hair #sukuna would be the closest to the idealized hot powerful guy image at least if ur a monsterfucker which i know many of us in the lgbt #community are. but he’s also an apocalyptic maneating entity who’s tied to the whims of a chaotically good teenager who would eat an entire #jar of mayo on a dare and summon him to ask for an opinion on his new hair dye. #which is both a hysterical premise that should be used more in fanart/fic for comedy AND profoundly pathetic on his part. #only exception to all this is nanami but thats bc he is textually canonically there to offset the swagless vibes of the main adult cast esp #gojo with his dignified huge dick energy. #to be clear i dont profoundly care about any of this like i think its funny im not mad about it . but as a known pathetic guy desirer i had #to say my piece #personal #jjk

[starsandthorn]

ah. so elynas and durin really are siblings huh

#personal stuff #thorn plays genshin #hm. hm. #can't believe albedo has another sibling! fontaine event where albedo goes to elynas. who's with me #hsdgfjdkh but fr i thought so after completing the quest! #big dead dragon born from a cosmic void with blood that crystallizes. cells that literally drop Alien Goop #and then the world quest where we get the pov of the ship's crew talking about the Abyssal sea monsters #AND THEN. now. rereading durin lore #durin specifically arose from the Sea and is described as being a black *serpentine* dragon in line with elynas's appearance #festering desire also speaks of a Mother #then dragonspine spear paints durin as being gentle and wanting to befriend the people of mondstadt #and feeling no ill will towards them or dvalin when he died #which is VERY in line with elynas saying he realized the things that interested him brought fear and pain to others. #and that if he could traverse this world without causing pain or fear he would. #is very similar to durin wishing he could have met dvalin and venti and mondstadt under different circumstances #both weapons speak of being born from the same darkness that elynas talks about #AND both of their hearts are still intact. why tf did jakob want to get elynas's to beat again. what the fuck #just aoooh. i love how much of genshin exploration is just realizing how fucking fitting the Cataclysm is as a name for what happened #and how much it happened Everywhere #like. at least 3/7 of the original archons died. which is fucking. bonkers to me #considering MOST of them lived until that point with the only confirmed exception being the og pyro archon #don't even get me started on the fact that most of these deaths aren't even known #makoto obviously and rukkhadevata retroactively. no one in fontaine says a WORD about the lord of amrita #the only ones who seem to care about her are the oceanids. what the fuck #but god. like #the narzissenkreuz institute and the order of skeptics questline. the impact that people trying to investigate the cataclysm had #on others and themselves #like it makes a lot of sense but we don't see it anywhere else!! fucking of course people would try to study the cataclysm!! #of course people would try and find out wtf happened!!! #but now everything to do with the cataclysm is confidential to the point where people don't believe that most of the stories are true

[theladyfae]

the way i was so taken by konstantin’s twisted obsession with vasya for the first two books and how it culminated at the beginning of the third but then the second i got to Those book 3 scenes i was like. oh. like, i get why people are insane abt him and medved now. me too, even.

#i’ve said it many times and i don’t ship this man with anyone as he is cause he’s pathetic and so consumed by self-hatred but his dynamics #w vasya and medved are made so delicious by it. and its just so interesting that his hatred & desire for vasya set the tone #for other characters to read him like a book. kasyan asking how much he loves vasya and then saying hatred for her is the same in his case #and medved saying he’s not one to distinguish between monster and devil before he kisses him #and vasya looking at him looking at medved and thinking he sees a creature he loves and reviles just as he loves and reviles himself #he’s just soooo. i’m eating him <3 #also the way he sorta hates medved in that exasperated way but medved somehow loves him !? and is the only one to mourn him after !? #like yes his and vasyas mutual hatred is everything but also ‘he was mine. he was beautiful. he is gone. of course i mourn’ from a creature #who had initially made himself his god and then somehow ended up konstantin’s admirer. obsessed #the winternight trilogy #konstantin nikonovich #faera's

[jovial-gender-jester]

if there's anything i care about more than magical girls, it's magical women

#txt.mine #thinking about how much i love the niche cuz adult lifestyles have such a fun variety of moments to start a story with #and i feel like the balance of agency through life & work & purpose & desire can get skewed in suchh a good way #like. maybe some characters are unemployed or stuck in a dead-end job or unsustainable passion-project. maybe everyone's in the same career #it's just so fun to see ensembles with conflicting life-styles and watch how it goes when these people finally have a moment to talk again #or there's roommates who got scouted off the street then have to balance deeply contemporary problems and a patron who's passionate but also #needs proxies for material change [fighting monsters of the week] #anyway. im so sleepy #to the stories i am thinking of [magical girl friendship squad {youtube series}] [heaven will be mine {pc visual novel}] [life after magic #{pc visual novel. disclaimer that i havent finished lam yet; tho i started it on a whim & it's Pretty charming so far}] #i need to talk about these stories more. god i love when women are complicated & stuck in a strained community

[dreamlikedesires]

Me, a monster fucker:

#dreamlike desires #dream like desires #dreamlikedesires #dimension 20 #kurraghran #the seven #aabria iyengar #brennan lee mulligan #quiddie #monster fucker