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sheeple · 1 year

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Lady Strong | Part 2

PHOTO NOT MINE. THIS IS ALL FICTION. Genre(s): Strong!reader / Angst? Fandom(s): House of the Dragon (TV series) Pairing(s): Aemond Targaryan x Strong!reader / Jacaerys Velaryon x Strong!reader (platonic/siblings) Summary: It's not easy being a Strong; with a mother who committed suicide, a father who sired three children out of wedlock and then died for it, and a creepy uncle who has nefarious plans for his niece, it's hard to find people who truly mean the best for you. Luckily there are your brothers and your fiance... right? Warning(s): Murder of a man A/n: I may or may not went a bit overboard with the second part. [Masterlist] [Mini masterlist] [Part One] [Part Three]

Six years have passed. The wound took a long time to heal and left a big scar. It sometimes throbs, like the memory.

Harrenhal is almost finished with its reconstruction. After the fire, not all was lost. The main pillars of the castle still stood upright once the fire was extinguished. And after six years it's almost rebuilt to its former glory.

The flapping of wings pulls your attention and you look up. From a distance, the distinct green colour of Vermax is easily spotted. Jace circles the tower you stand in before flying down and landing in the courtyard.

You run down the endless flights of stairs and into Jace's arms. He holds you tight to his chest, laying a hand on the back of your head. "Jace! It's been too long. How is your mother? And how is Luke?"

Jace laughs as you lead him into the castle. You ask a couple of servants to make both of you tea and some tarts. Taking place in one of the informal reception rooms, Jace and you take a couch.

"You would know how mother and Luke were if you came by more often..." Jace gives you a slight glance over his mug, but you wave his comment away.

"My dear lord uncle knew when I snuck off with you to go to Dragonstone every time. He has rats everywhere. I'm convinced he's locked me up in Harrenhal to either kill me by boredom or marry me off to the highest bidder." You slump down in your seat and huff.

The oldest Valeryon prince puts down his cup and turns to you. "If finding the right suitor makes you worried, I could..."

A gag escapes your mouth. "I respect your Targaryen traditions and customs, but no. Gross. Can't you ask your mother if she knows some houses with lads of my age? Isn't the Lord of Winterfell of our age?" You give Jace a teasing smile, but it drops as you see the serious look on his face.

"I didn't come here to catch up, my dear sister. We have a favour to ask of you." He grabs both of your hands. "Luke's claim to the Drifmark throne is being challenged by the brother of our Grandsire. We ask of you to stand by the Blacks to bolden Luke's claim."

"What does Luke want? What do you want?", you ask, peering into Jace's eyes.

He sighs. "Luke had been preparing most of his life to take the Driftmark throne. Is he ready? No. He still is young. And I? I just... want you safe and not in the middle of the family conflict."

You hum, nibbling on your bottom lip. "I already took a knife for him, so why not? When are we leaving?"

Jace jumps up from the couch and pulls you along the corridors. "Now, mother and Luke are almost at King's Landing."

"Couldn't you get to me sooner? What if I said no? I need to change first into a red or black dress!", you motion to the soft orange tone of the dress your currently wearing. Jace huffs but lets you change into something more appropriate.

Jace lifts you up on Vermax by your middle and secures you to the saddle before climbing behind you. And with that, you are off to the capital.

For your first time riding a dragon, it wasn't that bad. It was nice to feel the wind through your hair and it felt incredibly freeing, soaring above the water and through clouds. If you had a dragon, you would be flying every day.

Jace rushes past a ship, the one his mother and prince Daemon are on. A dragon flies next to the both of you. Arrax, Luke's dragon. He waves at you happily before taking a nosedive towards the water and nearly missing it.

As much fun as it is to fly on a dragon, you are happy that your feet are touching the muddy ground of the Red Keep. There is nobody to greet the Princess and her family and they huff in annoyance.

The two princes rush off towards the training grounds, but you stick around Rhaenyra.

"My Princess", you say while curtsying deeply. "You practically glow."

She waves you off with a smile and grabs the arm of her husband as she motions for you to walk with her. "How are you dear? Is Harrenhal good to you?"

You nod. "Yes, your Highness. It can be a tad boring, but it's good and safe."

Princess Rhaenyra seems content with that answer and you let her and her husband go to her father. You chose to follow her sons and go to the training field.

There is a crowd collected around one fight; Ser Criston against Prince Aemond. You grimace. You kinda hoped to not see the prince. Or at least the bear minimum. Both Luke and Jace watch gleefully the match.

As you want to turn around, a voice stops you. "Lady Strong, nephews, what a pleasure."

With a scowl, you turn around and give the prince the slightest smile. "My Prince. Well done, you'll be winning tourneys in no time." You curtsey slightly.

Aemond Targaryen has grown quite a lot over the years. He has grown taller, and leaner, and his hair resembles that of his forefathers. A true Targaryen prince if you have ever seen one.

What clashes with his fair complexion is the leather eyepatch over his left eye. A scar creeps from both under and above the patch.

You can feel his stare do the same to you, sizing you up, seeing how you've changed over the years, and then landing on the scar that cuts into your upper lip and goes over your left cheek.

You turn your face away, chewing on your bottom lip. Jace comes to stand next to you in support.

"I don't give a shit about tourneys, Lady Strong."

With a nod and a curtsy, you turn around, not caring to stick around any longer.

Knowing that the Princess is with the King, Princess Heleana is with her children, and your brothers are at the training grounds. So you aimlessly wander about the castle, seeing how much it has changed through the years.

The clicking of a cane you can hear come closer to you from down the hall, and you let out a sigh. "Uncle."

Larys Strong stops in front of you, his face without emotion. "What are you doing here? Didn't I order you to stay put at Harrenhal?"

Straightening your back, you answer back, "I am here to show my support to Prince Lucerys' claim to Driftmark."

Your uncle tightens his grip on the cane he holds, his jaw ticked. He looks like he wants to make words foul. But instead, he turns around and limps away.

"You for sure are not your uncle's favourite niece." Aemond appears behind you.

Feeling on edge, you bow. "Prince Aemond."

The corners of his lips turn up, a mischievous look in his eyes. "So, you're here to defend the little bastard? How brave of you, Lady Strong."

"How so, my Prince?" Your eyes narrow at him. The mention of your brothers' parentage is still a sore spot for the family. People still doubt they're late Leanor Valeryon's sons. And you're all too glad to say that all three of your brothers are Valeryon's to spare them a hard life.

Aemond takes an unexpected step towards you and reaches out a hand, softly trailing over the scar above your exposed collarbone. You pull away, the touch scorning hot against your skin.

His lips part to say something but at that moment the announcement of the vote beginning makes him snap out of his trance.

You bow and hurry away. Once the coast is clear, you lean against a wall and hold your chest, cursing your heart for beating so rapidly and the flutters in your stomach to calm down. You shouldn't be feeling this way about the one who constantly insults and speaks blasphemy about your brothers.

Making your way into the throne room, you stand at the back of the small group, squeezing Luke's hand in support. He gives you a grateful smile and turns back to the throne, holding onto his mother for dear life.

As you're not even listening to Vaemond Valeryon, you look around the throne room.

The Hand of the King, Otto Hightower, is seated on the throne, nodding along with Vaemond. The Queen stands with her children, and Uncle Larrys is somewhere in the crowd, his judgemental eyes burning to the back of your head.

From the hand full of sentences you shared, you know he isn't happy with your decision to stand by the Blacks. But you don't care. This is the family that truly cares about you, even if it needs to be a secret.

This is the family that celebrates your name day every year. And you are invited to spend every one of theirs in their company. This is the family that makes sure you don't wilt away in that damned castle like your mother.

This is the family, even if you weren't related by blood, still would be your family.

Another pair of eyes ─ or rather one eye and an eyepatch ─ have their unwavering attention on you. Aemond's. You glance at him and you lock eyes with him. He smirks slightly, his tongue darting out to wet his lips. His smirk unnerves you.

Jace also notices his uncle's full attention on you and he takes a small step backwards, standing protectively in front of you. His own eyes challenged that of the prince's to dare something, now or later.

As it is the turn of princess Rhaenyra to speak for her son and defend his claim, the doors open and in comes the King, hunched over and leaning heavily on his cane.

"King Viserys I Targaryen, the King of the Andals, the Rhoynar, and the First Men", announces a King's Guard and a gasp of surprise ripples through the throne room.

As the King drags himself into the room, everybody bows, just like you.

His breath is laboured and he has half of his face covered by a plate of gold, an imprint of a face decorating it.

The Greens share borderline panicked looks like this isn't supposed to happen. Which you guess shouldn't, seeing the state of the King.

Otto Hightower quickly moves off the throne and stands on the right side, with his family.

Before the King moves up the steps, he turns towards his hand. "I'll sit the throne today", he wheezes out before struggling upwards. He waves away a guard and continues on.

Halfway there, the crown falls off his head, and the King rests tiredly on his cane. Prince Daemon moves out of the crowd to help the King. He helps him sit on the throne before placing the crown back on the King's head.

After a moment of collecting his breath, the King speaks. "I must... admit... my confusion. I do not understand why petitions are being heard over a settled succession."

The voice of the King, although weak, echoes with power through the throne room.

"The only one present... who might offer keener insight into Lord Corlys's wishes, is the Princess Rhaenys."

At the words of the King, everyone turns to the Princess, who stands with one of her granddaughters. "Indeed, Your Grace."

She moves to the middle of the room. "It was ever my husband's will that Driftmark pass through Ser Laenor to his trueborn son... Lucerys Velaryon. His mind never changed. Nor did my support of him.

"As a matter of fact, the Princess Rhaenyra has just informed me of her desire to marry her sons Jace and Luke to Lord Corlys's granddaughters, Baela and Rhaena. A proposal which I heartily agree."

You turn towards Jace, and he towards you, questions in his eyes.

"Well", begins the King again, "the matter is settled. Again, I hereby reaffirm Prince Lucerys of House Velaryon as heir to Driftmark, the Driftwood Throne, and the next Lord of the Tides."

A silent relief goes through my body and a smile breaks out on my face. Luke's future is safe, as heir to Driftwood, but also in marriage to his cousin.

Vaemond Velaryon lashed out, angry at the decision of the King. He starts screaming around, pointing towards Luke angrily.

"You may run your house as you see fit, but you will not decide the future of mine. My house survived the Doom, and a thousand tribulations besides, and gods be damned, I will not see it ended on the account of this b..." Vaemond stops just in time before he can utter that dreaded word.

On Prince Daemon's face grows a sadistic smirk. "Say it."

He turns towards Prince Daemon with a smile. "Her children... are BASTARDS! And she is a whore."

Gasps are going around the crowd. You want to go to Vaemond, fight him, claw his eyes out to even dare to claim such a thing.

Suddenly, Vaemond turns towards you. "And we all know why they kept that wench around. I would bet on my life she’s also one of her BASTARD children."

Prince Daemon sneaks behind the lord and hacks off his head, only his tongue staying in place.

A whimper leaves your lips and you turn to hide on Jace's shoulder. He puts a protective arm around you as he leads you away, Luke in tow.

You are fully prepared to spend your evening supper alone, not too keen on company after witnessing such a brutal sight. A knock on your door however informs you that you are to be expected in the dining room.

A handmaiden helps you in a formal dress and put your hair up before you make your way down, fully aware of your lateness.

As the doors get opened for you, you see the entire royal family seated at the table, King Viserys in the middle flanked by his wife and his daughter. Eyes fall upon you and you grow uncomfortable, picking at the edge of your long sleeve, covering most of the burn.

Jace raises out of his chair, a smile forming on his face.

"I'm sorry to interrupt, Your Graces." You bow, ashamed.

The queen stands up, a bright smile on her face. "None sense, my child. Let us pull up a chair for you." She motions for you to come in.

Servants move quickly to set up a place next to Prince Aemond, the only free place left at the table. You make eye contact with Jace before moving towards the seat.

Aemond shoots up and moves to push your chair once you are seated on it. Sending a quick smile towards the Hand and Prince Aegon, you look at your plate.

The Queen grabs her goblet and raises it in the air. "I am proud to announce the betrothal of my son, Prince Aemond Targaryen and Lady (Y/n) Strong."

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religion-is-a-mental-illness · 3 months

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By: Tamara Pietzke

Published: Feb 5, 2024

For six years I worked at a hospital that said all teenagers with gender dysphoria must be affirmed. I quit my job to blow the whistle.

I know from firsthand experience what hard times are. Though I had a happy childhood, raised as the middle child by working-class parents in Washington State, my mom died of ovarian cancer when I was 22.

After that, my family fell apart. I felt lost and alone.

I decided to become a therapist because I didn’t want anyone to go through what I had, feeling like no one on this planet cares about them. At least they can say their therapist does.

I earned my master’s in social work from the University of Washington in 2012, and I have worked as a therapist for over a decade in the Puget Sound area. Most recently, I was employed by MultiCare, one of the largest hospital systems in the state.

For the six years I was there, I worked with hundreds of clients. But in mid-January, I left my job because of what I will go on to describe.

The therapeutic relationship is a special one. We are the original “safe space,” where people are able to explore their darker feelings and painful experiences. The job of the therapist is to guide a patient to self-understanding and sound mental health. This is a process that requires careful assessment and time, not snap judgments and confirmation of a patient’s worldview.

But in the past year I noticed a concerning new trend in my field. I was getting the message from my supervisors that when a young person I was seeing expressed discomfort with their gender—the diagnostic term is gender dysphoria—I should throw out all my training. No matter the patient’s history or other mental health conditions that could be complicating the situation, I was simply to affirm that the patient was transgender, and even approve the start of a medical transition.

I believe this rise of “affirmative care” for young people with gender dysphoria challenges the very fundamentals of what therapy is supposed to provide.

I am a 36-year-old single mother of three young kids all under the age of six. I am terrified of speaking out, but that fear pales in comparison to my strong belief that we can no longer medicalize youth and cause them potentially irreversible harm. The three patients I describe below explain why I am taking the risk of coming forward.

* * *

Last spring, I started seeing a new client, who at 13 years old had one of the most extreme and heartbreaking life stories I’ve ever heard. (For the sake of clarity, I am referring to all patients by their biological sex.)

My patient’s mother has bipolar disorder and was so abusive to my patient that the mother was given a restraining order. My patient was sexually assaulted by an older cousin, by one of her mother’s boyfriends, and also once at school by a classmate. Her diagnoses include depression, PTSD, anxiety, intermittent explosive disorder, and autism. She is being raised by her mother’s ex-boyfriend (not the one who assaulted her).

The year before I started seeing her, when she was 11, she was hospitalized for talking about committing suicide. Later that year, a pediatrician diagnosed her with gender dysphoria after she started to question her gender. The pediatrician referred her to Mary Bridge Children’s Gender Health Clinic, whose clinicians recommended she take medicine to suppress her periods and that she think about starting testosterone.

Mary Bridge, MultiCare’s pediatric hospital, runs the gender clinic for minors and employs nurses, social workers, dietitians, and endocrinologists, who provide gender-affirming care, which includes prescribing hormones to young patients who question their gender. In order to get that prescription, patients first need a recommendation letter from a therapist. Because Mary Bridge is a part of MultiCare, their patients were often referred to therapists like me who were in their system.

In an April 2022 blog post, a Mary Bridge social worker wrote that the gender clinic’s referrals increased from less than five a month in 2019 to more than 35 a month in 2022. In May 2022, the clinic received a $100,000 donation from Patient-Centered Outcomes Research Institute “to study health care disparities” in transgender youth.

The clinic operates in Washington, one of the states with some of the most lenient legislation on gender transition for youth. In May 2023, the state legislature passed a law guaranteeing that youth seeking a medical gender transition can stay at Washington shelters—and the shelters are not required to notify their parents.

Because of my patient’s autism, it was difficult for us to engage in introspective conversations. During our first visit, she came over to my desk to show me extremely sadistic and graphic pornographic videos on her phone. She stood next to me, hunched over, hyper-fixated on the videos as she rocked back and forth. She told me during one session that she watched horror and porn movies growing up because they were the only ones available in her house.

She showed up to our therapy sessions in disheveled, loose-fitting clothes, her hair greasy, her eyes staring down at the ground, her face covered by a Covid mask almost like a protective layer. She went by a boy’s name, but she never raised gender dysphoria with me directly—though one time she told me she would get mad at the sound of her own voice because “it sounds too girly.” When I asked her how she felt about an upcoming appointment at the gender clinic, she told me she didn’t know she had one.

In between scrolling through videos on her phone, she told me how she cried every night in bed and felt “insane.” She described a time when she was eight years old and her mother nearly killed her sister. She remembered her mother being taken away. At times, she would “age-regress,” she told me, by watching Teletubbies and sucking on pacifiers.

When she started seeing me, she had recently threatened to “blow up the school,” which resulted in her expulsion.

I knew I couldn’t solve all of her problems, or make her feel better in just a few therapy sessions. My initial goal was to make her feel comfortable opening up to me, to make the therapy room a place where she was heard and felt safe. I also wanted to try to protect her from falling prey to outside influences from social media, her peers, or even the adults in her life.

With a patient like this, with so many intersecting and overwhelming problems, and with such a tragic history of abuse, it took our first three sessions to get her feeling more comfortable to even talk to me, and to understand the dimensions of her problems. But when I called her guardian last fall to schedule a fourth appointment, he asked me to write her a letter of recommendation for cross-sex hormone treatment. That is, at age 13, she was to start taking testosterone. Such a letter from me begins the process of medical transition for a patient.

In Washington State, that’s all it takes—a few visits with a therapist and a letter, often written using a template provided by one’s superiors—for minors to undergo the irreversible treatments that patients must take for a lifetime.

I was scared for this patient. She had so many overlapping problems that needed addressing it seemed like malpractice to abruptly begin her on a medical gender transition that could quickly produce permanent changes.

The MultiCare recommendation letter Tamara was given for approving the medical treatment of minors with gender dysphoria. I emailed a program manager in my department at MultiCare and outlined my concerns. She wrote back that my client’s trauma history has no bearing on whether or not she should receive hormone treatment.

“There is not valid, evidenced-based, peer-reviewed research that would indicate that gender dysphoria arises from anything other than gender (including trauma, autism, other mental health conditions, etc.),” she wrote.

She also warned that “there is the potential in causing harm to a client’s mental health when restricting access to gender-affirming care” and suggested I “examine [my] personal beliefs and biases about trans kids.”

When Tamara outlined her concerns about giving a patient testosterone to her manager at MultiCare, she was told to “examine your personal beliefs and biases about trans kids.” She then reported me to MultiCare’s risk management team, who removed my client from my care and placed her with a new therapist.

A risk manager’s job is to minimize the hospital’s liability, but in my case, they deemed that my concerns posed a greater risk to my client than giving her a life-altering procedure with no proven long-term benefit.

I shouldn’t have been surprised by this. Just a few months earlier, in September of last year, I was one of over 100 therapists and behavioral specialists at the MultiCare hospital system required to attend mandatory training on “gender-affirming care.”

As hard as it is to believe given my work, I hadn’t heard about gender-affirming care before that moment. I needed to know more. So each night in the week leading up to the training, I searched online for information about gender-affirming care. After putting my kids to bed, I sat glued to my computer screen, losing sleep, horrified at what I found.

I discovered that neither puberty blockers nor cross-sex hormones (testosterone or estrogen) were approved by the Food and Drug Administration as a treatment for gender dysphoria. In fact, prescribing these treatments to kids can have drastic side effects, including infertility, loss of sexual function, increased risk of heart attack, stroke, cardiovascular disease, cancer, bone density problems, blood clots, liver toxicity, cataracts, brain swelling, and even death.

While gender clinicians claim hormonal treatment improved their patients’ psychological health, the studies on this are few and highly disputed.

I found that those experiencing gender dysphoria are up to six times more likely to also be autistic, and they are also more likely to suffer from schizophrenia, trauma, and abuse.

The research also implies that the dramatic rise in these diagnoses across the West likely have a strong element of social contagion. In children ages 6 to 17, there was a 70 percent increase in diagnoses of gender dysphoria in the U.S. from 2020 to 2021. In Sweden there was a 1,500 percent increase in these diagnoses among girls 13–17 from 2008 to 2018.

Yet, countries that were once the pioneers of gender transition medicine are now starting to backtrack. In 2022, England announced it will close its only gender clinic after an investigation uncovered subpar medical care, including findings that some patients were rushed toward gender transitions. Sweden and Finland undertook comprehensive analyses of the state of gender medicine and recommended restrictions on transition of minors.

I decided—though it was potentially dangerous to my career and to me—to ask questions about the findings I discovered.

The training I attended laid out an affirming model of gender care—from pronouns and “social transition” to hormone treatments and surgical intervention. In order for children to be diagnosed with gender dysphoria, the training stated, patients must meet six of eight characteristics, ranging from “a strong desire/insistence of being another gender” to “strong preference for cross-gender toys and games.”

Tamara and her MultiCare colleagues were trained to diagnose gender dysphoria among their young patients when they met six of the eight above characteristics. It was made abundantly clear to all in attendance that these recommendations were “best practice” at MultiCare, and that the hospital would not tolerate anything less.

When the leader of the training brought up hormone treatments, I shakily tapped the unmute button on Zoom and asked why 70 to 80 percent of female adolescents diagnosed with gender dysphoria have prior mental health diagnoses.

She flashed a look of disgust as she warned me against spreading “misinformation on trans kids.” Soon the chat box started blowing up with comments directed at me. One colleague stated it was not “appropriate to bring politics into this” and another wrote that I was “demonstrating a hostility toward trans folks which is [a] direct violation of the Hippocratic Oath,” and recommended I “seek additional support and information so as not to harm trans clients.”

In the training, gender-affirming treatment is presented as “suicide prevention.” As soon as I closed my laptop, I burst into tears. I care so deeply about my clients that even thinking about this now makes me cry. I couldn’t understand how my colleagues, who are supposed to be my teammates, could be so quick to villainize me. I also wondered if maybe my colleagues were right, and if I had gone insane.

Later, my boss reached out to me and told me it was “inappropriate” of me to raise these questions, telling me that a training session was not the proper forum. When I tried to present the evidence that caused me concern—the lack of long-term studies, the devastating side effects—she told me she didn’t have time to read it.

“I am speaking out because nothing will change unless people like me blow the whistle,” Tamara writes. “I am desperate to help my patients.” In retrospect, this ideology had been growing in power for a long time.

I remember in 2019 seeing signs of how gender dysphoria arose among many of my most vulnerable female clients, all of whom struggled with previous psychological problems.

In 2019, I started seeing a 16-year-old client after her pediatrician referred her to me for anxiety, depression, and ADHD. When I first met her, she had long blonde hair covering her eyes, to the point you could barely see her face. It was like she was going through the world trying to be invisible.

In 2020, during the pandemic, she told me she had started reading online a lot about gender, and said she started feeling like she wasn’t a girl anymore.

Around this time, her anxiety became so debilitating she couldn’t leave her house—not even to go to school. After taking a year off school during the pandemic, she enrolled in an alternative school for kids struggling with mental health. I was relieved that she was making friends for the first time, and seemed to be feeling a lot better.

Then she started using they/he pronouns, identified as pansexual, and replaced the skirts and fishnet stockings she often wore with disheveled and baggy clothes. Her long hair became shorter and shorter. She started wearing a binder to flatten her breasts. She tried out a few different names before settling on one that’s gender neutral.

The official diagnosis I gave her was “adjustment disorder”—an umbrella term often applied to young people who are having a hard time coping with difficult and stressful circumstances. It’s the type of diagnosis that doesn’t follow a child forever—it implies that mental distress among kids is often transient.

She came out as transgender to her family in 2021. Her mother was supportive, but her dad wasn’t. Regardless, she went to her pediatrician seeking a referral to a gender clinic.

In 2022, she went to Mary Bridge Children’s Gender Health Clinic for the first time, where the clinicians informed her and her parents that if she didn’t receive hormone replacement therapy, she could be “at increased risk for anxiety, depression, and worsening of mental health/psychological trauma,” according to her patient records. Her dad refused to start his daughter on testosterone, and so all the clinic could do was prescribe birth control to stop her period due to her “menstrual dysphoria,” or distress over getting her period. Which is something I thought all teenage girls experienced.

Five months later, she swallowed a bottle of pills and her mother had to rush her to the emergency room.

By early 2023, my client logged on to our weekly session, which we started doing by Zoom, and she told me she identified as a “wounded male dog.” She explained to me that this was her “xenogender,” a concept she had discovered online, which references gender identities that go “beyond the human understanding of gender.” She said she felt she didn’t have all of the right appendages, and that she wanted to start wearing ears and a tail to truly feel like herself.

I was stunned. All I could do was silently nod along.

After the session, I emailed my colleagues looking for advice. “I want to be accepting and inclusive and all of that,” I wrote, but “I guess I just don’t understand at what point, if ever, a person’s gender identity is indicative of a bigger issue.”

I asked them: “Is there ever a time where acceptance of a person’s identity isn’t freely given?”

The consensus from my colleagues was that it wasn’t a big deal.

“It sounds like this isn’t something that’s ‘broken,’ ” one colleague wrote me back, “so let’s not try to ‘fix’ it.”

“If someone told me they use a litterbox instead of a toilet and they were happy with it and it’s part of their life that brings them fulfillment, then great!” she continued. “I might think it’s weird, but then again, not my life.”

After learning that one of Tamara’s patients identified as “a wounded male dog,” a colleague replied: “If someone told me they use a litterbox instead of a toilet and they were happy with it and it’s part of their life that brings them fulfillment, then great!” I was baffled and alarmed by her unquestioning affirmation. At what point does a change in identity represent a mental health concern, and not something to be celebrated and affirmed? Fortunately, my client never brought up her “xenogender” again. She also isn’t on testosterone due to her father’s disapproval. So I kept these thoughts to myself, and ultimately, in order to keep my job, I let it go.

Another female patient, who transitioned as a teen, serves as a warning of what happens when we passively accept the idea that gender transition will entirely resolve a patient’s mental health issues.

This client, who I started seeing in 2022, is now 23 and rarely leaves the house, spends most of the day in bed playing video games, and envisions no path to working or functioning in the outside world due to a variety of mental health problems. In 2016, this patient was diagnosed with autism, anxiety, and gender dysphoria. Later the diagnoses grew to include depression, Tourette syndrome, and a conversion disorder. In 2018, at age 17, the Mary Bridge Gender Health Clinic prescribed testosterone, despite the fact that this patient is diabetic and one of the hormone’s side effects is that it might increase insulin resistance. The patient’s mother, who has another transgender child, strongly encouraged it.

This patient now has a wispy mustache and a deepened voice, but does not pass as male. It turns out that testosterone, which will be prescribed for life, did not relieve the patient’s other mental illnesses.

My biggest fear about the gender-affirming practices my industry has blindly adopted is that they are causing irreversible damage to our clients. Especially as they are vulnerable people who come to us at their lowest moments in life, and who entrust us with their health and safety. And yet, instead of treating them as we would patients with any other mental health condition, we have been instructed—and even bullied—to abandon our professional judgment and training in favor of unquestioning affirmation.

I am speaking out because nothing will change unless people like me—who know the risks of medicalizing troubled young people—blow the whistle. I am desperate to help my patients.

And I believe, if I don’t speak out, I will have betrayed them.

https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/pdf/10.1080/26895269.2022.2100644

Amidst the scandal, Mary Bridge Children's has deleted the above blog post by self-professed "they/them," Aytch Denaro. However, the internet doesn't forget.

#Tamara Pietzke #Jamie Reed #whistleblower #medical malpractice #medical transition #medical corruption #gender dysphoria #gender ideology #queer theory #gender affirming care #gender affirming healthcare #gender affirmation #mental health #mental health issues #mental illness #gender cult #genderwang #religion is a mental illness

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wormwoodandhoney · 26 days

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quarter one favorites! tw: suicide, grief, murder & depression mention in descriptions below.

Crying in H Mart by Michelle Zauner - a memoir about a young woman & the death of her mother. Reading about other people's grief helps me understand my own.

The Sword of Kaigen by ML Wang - a fantasy about a mother with a violent past and her teenaged son struggling to prove himself as he begins to realize that the empire he serves may not be as pure as he once thought. Really cool use of elemental powers here, and incredible fight scenes. I love reading books with unique characters/relationships, and these are definitely unique. Graphic made here.

Everyone on this Train is a Suspect by Benjamin Stevenson - sequel to one of my favorites from last year (Everyone in My Family Has Killed Someone). Funny and voicey and incredibly meta, I love these books and I hope there are more!

Lonely Castle in the Mirror by Mizuki Tsujimura - Translated from Japanese, this is such a unique blend of fantasy and coming-of-age. Kokoro is a middle school student who is can no longer bring herself to attend school. As she struggles with her depression, she finds a portal in her mirror to a mysterious castle. Six other children are there, and they begin to understand each other. Trigger warnings for depression & suicidal ideation. Graphic here.

The Mysterious Case of the Alperton Angels by Janice Hallett - I LOVE Janice Hallett's books, which are all mysteries told through emails, interview transcriptions, diary entries, chat logs, etc. This one is about a journalist investigating a years-long cold case about a cult who brainwashed a young woman into believing her baby was the Antichrist. When the young woman realized her mistake and called the police, the cult committed suicide and the baby & mother disappeared. As the journalist digs through case files in order to find them, she finds herself drawn into becoming part of the mystery.

Anita De Monte Laughs Last by Xochitl Gonzalez In one timeline of 1985, Anita De Monte is a rising art star married to a much more famous man. She dies unexpectedly and her legacy in lost. In 1998, art student Raquel begins to uncover the truth as she does her thesis on Anita's husband.

The Butcher of the Forest by Premee Mohamed A mean little fantasy horror novella that pulls no punches. Middle aged Veris is the only person who has ever successfully rescued a child from her village's surrounding wild and magical forest. After the land's tyrant's children disappear into the forest, he commands Veris to fetch them.

The Vanderbeekers of 141st St by Karina Yan Glaser This one came in right under the wire as my last read of March! It's just an incredible, sweet, cozy middle grade novel about a large family desperate to stay in their beloved brownstone. Graphic here.

#books #quarterly favorites #i had sooooo many dnfs this quarter like more than all of last year put together #q

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eternal-echoes · 6 months

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A woman who was pumped with testosterone and underwent hormone therapy when she was a young teenager is suing both her doctors and the American Academy of Pediatrics, which her lawyers say has knowingly lied about the impact of the radical sex-change treatments it recommends, according to a copy of the lawsuit obtained exclusively by The Daily Wire. Isabelle Ayala, now a twenty-year-old woman, had just turned fourteen when she was committed to the hospital for suicidal thoughts, according to the lawsuit. It was during this hospital stay that she met with Dr. Jason Rafferty, who during his first brief meeting with Ayala determined that she “meets criteria to consider hormonal transition,” with the only stated obstacle being parental consent. The lawsuit states that Rafferty and other doctors sent Ayala down the “path of ‘gender-affirming’ medicalization” rather than addressing the true roots of her mental health problems — six months into her testosterone treatments, Ayala tried to commit suicide. The treatments, however, continued, until Ayala moved away from Rhode Island and decided to quit them “cold-turkey.” Now comfortable with her gender, she regrets what the doctors did to her, the lawsuit says. “Isabelle is now twenty years old and longs for what could have been and to have her healthy, female body back,” it says. “The changes the testosterone have had on her body are a constant reminder that she needed an unbiased medical expert willing to evaluate her mental health and provide her the care she needed, rather than a group of ideologues set on promoting their own agenda and furthering a broader conspiracy at her expense.” The lawsuit not only goes after the doctors who treated Ayala, but also the American Academy of Pediatrics, where Rafferty and his colleagues worked to publish a now-infamous policy statement advocating for aggressive gender treatments for children. Lawyers for Ayala say the policy statement laid the groundwork for an “entirely new model of treatment” based on “outright fraudulent representations” of scientific proof. ... Ayala is “an unfortunate victim of a collection of actors who prioritized politics and ideology over children’s safety, health, and well-being,” the lawsuit filed on her behalf states. She had suffered with her mental health ever since being a victim of sexual abuse, long before she began entertaining the idea of gender transition as a solution to her depression. The lawsuit says that Rafferty, Forcier, and other doctors failed to even consider other options to address her mental health before putting her on an aggressive hormone and testosterone regimen. Ayala told her doctors that she was concerned about losing the ability to give birth, but they put her on the treatments anyway, without disclosing the potential harm the drugs administered could have on the reproductive system. The lawsuit says that Ayala is worse off now than before she was treated by the doctors, and asks that they be held “accountable for their wrongful acts.” “Isabelle has suffered from vaginal atrophy from the extensive use of testosterone; she deals with excess facial and body hair; she struggles with compromised bone structure; she is unsure whether her fertility has been irreversibly compromised; she still has mental health issues and deals with episodes of anxiety and depression, further compounded by a sense of regret; and she has since contracted an autoimmune disease that only the males in her family have a history of,” the lawsuit explains.

Emphasis are mine

#Isabelle Ayala #trans #transgenderism #transgender ideology #gender ideology #lgbt

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horizon-verizon · 8 months

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I think the reason Rhaenyra was fine working with Mysaria, despite her being Daemon’s mistress, is because Rhaenyra is entrenched enough in the feudal system to not see Mysaria as a threat because she’s of drastically lower status. Mysaria was lowborn, formerly enslaved, with a history of sex work and being a spymaster in the least savory part of the capital, all things that women get dehumanized for in the society that Rhaenyra was raised in. Mysaria isn’t like Rhaenyra. Rhaenyra is special, she’s Valyrian, she’s the heir to the throne, and she’s a dragonrider. None of the things that ever happened to Mysaria because of Daemon would ever happen to her. She’s different, he would never abandon her to get put on a boat somewhere while he flies off to another person because power is pointing in a different direction.

But he did do that, and that’s where Nettles comes in. Daemon groomed Rhaenyra (and arguably also Laena) as a teenager. Daemon is into very questionably young dragonriders because he’s real into Valyria. Nettles is the last one in that pattern, and Daemon running off with this girl who ISNT Valyrian and IS lowborn, gender nonconforming, and “ugly” had to have been more of a betrayal for Rhaenyra psychologically.

Rhaenyra committed to a life with Daemon, he said he was going to fight for her, and it turned into a war that killed all but one of her children (all six of whom she had before she was 30) and a rapidly decaying claim on the power she sacrificed so much for. And when bearing this inhuman tidal wave of grief got to be a little too hard for her husband to deal with, he ran off on a probable suicide mission with a plucky and naive 16 year old dragonrider and left his wife and their son out to dry. This is a world-destroying betrayal and revelation to deal with for Rhaenyra, and she cannot deal with it, so she just decides to blame Nettles and try to get her killed. She literally cannot believe that her husband would do this to her, it has to be 16 year-old Nettles’ fault, the slut, the tramp, the temptress who led her man astray.

*EDITED POST* (12/15/23)

I and others write HERE & HERE about why Nettles and Daemon never had sex and just had a paternal-mentee relationship, if not her just being his bio bastard daughter. Not enough? You may check out this "masterpost" darklina compiled.

You: "I think the reason Rhaenyra was fine working with Mysaria, despite her being Daemon’s mistress, is because Rhaenyra is entrenched enough in the feudal system to not see Mysaria as a threat because she’s of drastically lower status. Mysaria was lowborn, formerly enslaved, with a history of sex work and being a spymaster in the least savory part of the capital, all things that women get dehumanized for in the society that Rhaenyra was raised in."

Okay, (11/14/23 NOTE: I should have put this into the original doc of this post) I won't deny that Rhaenyra underestimated Mysaria from classism...but I do have questions:

Why wouldn't she be okay working with Mysaria long term or using her spy network 7 connections? Apart from being uncomfortable with the fact Mysaria was (not "is") Daemon's one-time-some-time lover? There are differences b/t worrying bc of a past relationship reigniting, not wanting your lover's baggage around, and actually worrying that the ex-lover would harm you. What reason do you expect Rhaenyra to have to suspect Mysaria of actually plotting against her when Rhaenyra did nothing to Mysaria.... absolutely nothing AND when Mysaria only stood to gain actual power & relative safety away from her former downtrodden life? In being under Rhaenyra's "employ"? Why are you making Rhaenyra out to be this super paranoid person before her actual super-paranoia kicks in?

Have you ever wondered what exactly makes Mysaria willing to try to make Rhaenyra fall after years of her willingly helping Daemon to spy and kill a literal child on this command and possibly for his & Rhaenyra's need for revenge? (This is about the rumor that she and Dameon were sleeping with each other after Rhaenyra retreated more after the taking of KL. I do not think they slept together anymore after contemplating this exact thing.) If it were true that Mysaria simply continued being Daemon's mistress...why the hell would she antagonize him or bring about his downfall if she stands to benefit from Rhaenyra & Daemon winning and making a comeback? So it has to be about something more than her supposedly wanting Daemon back/be his real mistress again and getting rejected. Otherwise, it is some cheap soap opera nonsense (which can be entertaining elsewhere but doesn't fit w/Mysaria's character nor the themes of this story--again Mysaria was willing to work for Daemon for literal years while he's been building a whole ass family). Mysaria always struck me as a pragmatist; no sex worker, past or present, expects their past customer/lover to actually "choose" them. (one theory [developed from hamliet's about Mysaria and bastard kids] is that Mysaria knows Nettles is Daemon's bio daughter or at least suspects it, feels cheated out of a happy life with her own bastard kid who would have been Daemon's first child and even received an egg, and thus targets Nettles)

Why would Rhaenyra see Mysaria as a legitimate romantic threat, when Mysaria & Daemon were physically apart for almost 20 yrs before they finally landed in KL? When Daemon never saw her again since she was exiled to Lys & suffered her miscarriage?

It seems you have an idea of Mysaria's motivation for deceiving Rhaenyra, and you seem to think that it is bc Mysaria is this hero/good actor trying to save KL, advocates for the little guy, and looks for "the realm" best interests away from Rhaenyra's tyranny. Did you know that by making Rhaenyra go after Nettles, Mysaria was also targeting Nettles?, a lowborn dark-skinned girl of 17? Even if Nettles was sleeping with Daemon, why would Mysaria phrase her sex w/Daemon with provocative language, approach Rhaenyra as if this were a troublesome topic, or even mention it at all to the one person who could/would hurt Nettles? And encourage Rhaenyra to stop/separate the two "lovers"?! IF she, Mysaria actually wanted to look out for vulnerable people or was thinking of that when she "exposed" Daemon & Nettles?!

You: "Mysaria isn’t like Rhaenyra. Rhaenyra is special, she’s Valyrian, she’s the heir to the throne, and she’s a dragonrider. None of the things that ever happened to Mysaria because of Daemon would ever happen to her. She’s different, he would never abandon her to get put on a boat somewhere while he flies off to another person because power is pointing in a different direction."

Being a Valyrian dragonrider or just a Valyrian/of descent doesn't really make you special or "better" as a person. Magnetic, cooler, possibly charismatic, confident, and certainly more powerful...yeah. "Better" as in a higher value? Nah.

Maegor, Rhaena-Rider-of-Dremafyre (specifically about the suffocation of her family and lover), Aemond and Aegon II, Viserys I & II, Daemon, Alysanne, and Jaehaerys I--all these people had faults. Major & minor ones. A few were evil.

I espe. do not understand what is going on here: "None of the things that ever happened to Mysaria because of Daemon would ever happen to her."

If you are saying that it's solely Daemon's fault Mysaria loses her kid or eventually gets whipped to death in the streets, not really but kinda. While theirs was a consensual relationship for what it was-- where afterward they sought each other to further use the other Mysaria wanted/sought him out and continued to be in his/Rhaenyra's employ for the power and safety that comes with the position--it's also true that Daemon complied w/Viserys' order. I will explain later in point 3 how even here it's odd considering the possible ramifications for Daemon not sending Mysaria away and a headcanon as to why he did, but I could be giving him too much grace.

It's worth considering the inherent exploitativeness of sex work within patriarchy even when a person chooses to go into sex work.

In reality, the person has very little protections against clients' violence or from rape

said violence is hard to predict to avoid yet can never be avoided

you can be trafficked into doing unpaid sex and become a sex slave

you're more exposed to sexually transmitted diseases if you do not have sustained access to the proper preventative materials and MOST sex workers globally do not

GLOBALLY you can lose your kids or not be able to grow a family if you wanted to bc many prostitutes are barely able to privde for themselves (sex work is not lucrative for most) or your pimp will kill.traffic them

it is mainly in the poorest, colonized, and/or war-genocide-torn, PoC countries where SW is literally an imprisonment and punishment for women--even if they somehow escaped their enslavers/traffickers, because of the stigma AND sex work these women & children & some men cannot find nonSW-->they fall back into SW often & it becomes their only way to sustain themselves and somethimes even this isn't enough

but in the U.S., too, SW is not protected bc it only helps undercover clients who number the politicians, etc. to keep SWers in this fraught existence -- it only benefits the powers-that-be to facilate these countries' chaos that trickles down to passport-bros traveling long distances to take advantage of economically destitue young girls and women

and in the U.S., European countries who've historically practiced/practice imperilaist measures against those countries, even some of those who volantarily go into SW are in real danger of being trafficked into sexual slavery, wehre people get them addicted to drugs to make them more docile & prevent them from being able to leave

and there's an "expiration" date for you that you-the-SWer more likely never determined...there's no government-aided "retirement" age or compensation for sex work in most countries -- some SWers are killed when they go past their percieved attractiveness or left to die...and where can they get a job or performe well enough to sustain themselves after months or years of sexual slavery?

even in voluntary SW, the person, esp doing full time SW, has lost years of experience to put on a resume bc SW isn;t somethingnyou put on a resume

And most of these things hold true for medieval SWers, who also numbered teens & children as young as 10 or so. Mysaria comes from this environment, having been a SWers, possibly a sex slave, from Lys. How well would she have avoided doing SW while a dancer, esp when we consider how the 2 activites were often interlocked in several cultures pre-modern era? As acting was in Rome? Mysaria was not toally in control of her own life, as HotD does well to tell us, even if not well to show us.

So yes, Daemon is certainly exploiting this very cancer of his society. And this means that Mysaria, as in the show, went to him to get out of its mire.

taking from the bit I said abt SWers not being able to grow a family of their own--actually systematically denied having a family or to trust in having one (Alayaya & her brothel-owning mother...what mother truly wishes to put her daughter in danger in a world that doesn't prize SW as the Summer Islands do?)

the implication of Mysaria's rage/realization of her being forced into being alone and abused, not even able to have a child to alleviate that loneliness (her being forced to go back to the place that put her into SW AND the journey killing her child) -> "Lady Misery"

remembering who hamliet explained there being a pattern between children and Mysaria HERE

I think now more than ever that Mysaria went after Nettles and more likely did at least make a remark of something like the Brothel Queens thing or was responsible for Helaena's death in telling her about Maelor's death. There was no coercion nor evidence of such happening at any time b/t her and Daemon...but she was being used and was abandoned. There is nothing to suggest that Daemon forced her to "accept" his attraction...but she looked to him for a way out and was punished for it.

Again, at the same time, Mysaria turns her pain & revenge against Rhaenyra & Daemon to targeting Nettles and enabling Blood & Cheese's murder of Jaehaerys. These were of her own volition, her choice. And Daemon WANTED that child, which came with her.

Mysaria's body is a commodity in the sex trade a patriarchy where Daemon benefits sexually & politically much more than she would have, and yes while Daemon complied with Viserys' order and can be argued to deserve his death at her hands, the main direct aggressor towards Mysaria was neither Nettles nor Daemon (again, he was willing and actively accepted Mysaria's kid and was going to take her in) much but Viserys and his need for others to see him as upholding feudal aristocratic deals/the Royce alliance.

You: "She’s different, he would never abandon her to get put on a boat somewhere while he flies off to another person because power is pointing in a different direction."

INCOMING HEADCANON!!!

When Mysaria lost their child, we get this ("A Question of Succession"):

"or else be attainted as a traitor"; "obeyed, though with ill grace"; "spoke of Viserys only with disdain"; "brood day and night on the succession"

There were unfair consequences to her search for happiness with a prince while being a former sex worker and not a noble, but none of that is particularly Daemon's fault.

You imply that it is totally Daemon's fault for Mysaria being exiled to Lys when that shit is on Viserys alone, who ordered her exile. Viserys threatened Daemon with naming him an actual traitor. This could mean that it's on sight for Daemon AND his paramour AND their bastard child, or they are just more at risk because Daemon, their only chance at protection, is himself threatened with one of the highest crimes of a feudal society--treachery against the monarch. Path of least resistance.

I agree that Daemon puts her in the line of danger bc allowing someone like Mysaria to get involved with him while knowing/suspecting Viserys would not approve is much riskier for her than for him.

At the same time, if your king/president/dictator (all in all, a state leader) tells you that you must do a thing you really do not want to do or is against your strongest desires and in anger as if it was a personal affront to you, and they are ready to take more drastic measures to see it done....how likely are you, anon, NOT going to do it? Even if you were as powerful, feared, or respected as Daemon? Especially when that person/leader is your brother/relative and "head" of the society you live in? What if you thought that disobedience would put your kid and its mother more at risk?!

Viserys is king; Daemon, despite being defiant, actually still obeys his orders of exile from KL because he likely doesn't want Viserys to appear even weaker than he already thinks he does by disobeying him--bc that means less for the entire house, which is a huge concern of Daemon. Daemon's not out here looking for power for power's sake--he has done all he did for the sake of a family unit's prosperity, legacy, happiness, and supremacy, which for the Targs is very interconnected as it is for noble houses/feudal aristocratic families like the Hightowers. Otherwise, he'd just stay in KL all the times Viserys exiles him.

At the same time, he's always able & insistent on coming back.

Headcanon time & trying to get into this guy's head: Perhaps from his pattern of coming back after being exiled, he seems to know that if he gives Viserys time and little interaction, Viserys will not be that upset with him for actually coming back...partially bc he knows Viserys actually cares about him and they have mostly had each other since young. So when he gets the order to let Mysaria go, and abandon her & their coming kid, it's because Viserys is king, his brother, his companion as kids, his "charge", and his superior BUT it could also be said that Daemon expected to get Mysaria and their son to come back at a later date.

In other words, there's more to be said than Daemon leaving Mysaria because she was lower-class or a prostitute. Yes, he left her out to dry, & her not being family or a Targ made the decision a little easier as she has no noble family to at least make Viserys think twice.

Mysaria was already in a lower position and vulnerable bc she was not an aristocrat's daughter or of high enough rank, she was a sex worker, AND she was put into a worse position when Viserys wanted her gone and kings have ultimate authority. Plus, once more, what happens to Mysaria here is heartbreaking not only bc she was denied her child/safety from Viserys, but because she chose a path to happiness and security of all her own volition--she did not need to go to Daemon or have a relationship, he never coerced her--but the monarchial system was set against her.

Of course, this part could be just me overgracing Daemon, but it strikes me as odd that Daemon wants his kid with Mysaria to live--he gave her a dragon egg, for godsakes, he was hella proud & excited for this kid, his first would-be child!--that you think the fault of Mysaria's loss and his own loss is entirely on Daemon and not on the person who ordered the separation in the first place. But again, Daemon chose to get Mysaria--the more vulnerable party--involved...

You: "But he did do that, and that’s where Nettles comes in. Daemon groomed Rhaenyra (and arguably also Laena) as a teenager. Daemon is into very questionably young dragonriders because he’s real into Valyria. Nettles is the last one in that pattern, and Daemon running off with this girl who ISNT Valyrian and IS lowborn, gender nonconforming, and “ugly” had to have been more of a betrayal for Rhaenyra psychologically."

No. Daemon did not groom Laena. Daemon met and married Laena shortly after she turned 22-23. She's a grown woman who doesn't have a real care in the world by the time they get together or get to actually know each other.

Grooming involves these:

physically or emotionally separate a victim from those protecting them and often seek out positions in which they have contact with minors

gaining the trust of a potential victim through gifts, attention, sharing “secrets” and other means to make them feel that they have a caring relationship and to train them to keep the relationship secret

will often start to touch a victim in ways that appear harmless, such as hugging, wrestling and tickling, and later escalate to increasingly more sexual contact, such as massages or showering together. Abusers may also show the victim pornography or discuss sexual topics with them, to introduce the idea of sexual contact

behaviors are not only used to gain a victim’s trust but often are used to create a trustworthy image and relationship with their family and community. Child and teen sexual abusers are often charming, kind, and helpful — exactly the type of behavior we value in friends and acquaintances

For him to groom Laena, he had to be at Driftmark for an extended period when she was at her most emotionally/psychologically vulnerable. Where the hell is evidence that Laena was in such a state? The girl was living with her dragon, being a dragon rider and ignoring her Braavosi betrothed--in a word, relatively happy and content.

She was just attracted to Daemon and wanted her betrothed gone, come off it. Maybe you're thinking of HotD, where Laena is younger than Rhaenyra; in F&B, it's the reverse. Blame the TV writers for this change and hypocrisy. Either way, you are denying Laena's agency and the consent given there at the same time by claiming she was groomed or that a 23-year-old is child enough to be groomed.

His and Rhaenyra's relationship is much closer to the definition of grooming by how she was way under 18 when he was giving her gifts and attention after the 111 A.C. tourney. I don't totally knock you for thinking that, he definitely performed manipulation on young Rhaenyra and used her/their bond/her admiration for him. And yes, he is attracted to people of Valyrian descent and those who are dragonriders most of all.

However, I already explained how he didn't groom or was sexually attracted to Nettles in the links all the way above and I gave the link to darklina's "masterpost". And it's not because she is dark-skinned, (to Gyldayn) possibly not "sexually pure" or "ugly" by Westeodsi standards.

Once more, why did Maester Norren say: "I saw the joy go from his eyes, and a sadness descended upon him, like a weight too heavy to be borne." And right after that, Daemon say: "A queen’s words, a whore’s work."

Combine these two things, and we see that Daemon's expressing regret for Rhaenyra's believing in false words and deception, which more than likely means his sexual relationship with Nettle is itself a complete fabrication.

Just because it is Rhaenyra's fear (during a time she was at her most paranoid and afraid of losing more support, emotionally and politically), doesn't mean that it actually going on. That's a huge feature and consequence of paranoia. And suspicion or hatred. What this entire story was about the misogyny against Rhaneyra, the rumors against her sons and herself meant to harm her. What are "facts" in the hands of conspiring or fearful agents but dreams of envy?

You: "Rhaenyra committed to a life with Daemon, he said he was going to fight for her, and it turned into a war that killed all but one of her children (all six of whom she had before she was 30) and a rapidly decaying claim on the power she sacrificed so much for."

...and he did fight for her.

Instead of running off to god knows where he kills Aemond in a battle he cannot win alive AND he is the one who organized or led the murder/kidnapping of Aegon the Elder's son for Lucerys and Rhaenyra's pain. The last part was his way of advocating for her and Lucerys as well as an expression of his own pain. Was it morally wrong, yes? Was it still a reaction to Aemon's murdering Luke and the greens usurping Rhaenyra? Absolutely. Who is to blame for upending the entire kingdom for power & whose line is eradicated for it? The greens/Alicent.

He is the one who says that they shouldn't attack KL immediately in the book after Rhaenys suggests that, and he is the one to advise Rhaenyra to give Ulf/Hugh tracts of land and have them marry the Rosby and Stokeworth girls as rewards.

He's the one who captured Harrenhal for her took KL for her and made sure it was safe to land for her after he tricked Aemond and flew with Rhaenyrs to KL.

From beginning to end, he fought for Rhaenyra and NEVER tried to supersede her authority until she actually began to distrust his fidelity and devotion AND possibly try to have his bio daughter (or mentee/adopted daughter) killed., i.e. reject another of his kids after they have already cultivated a nontraditional family unit? Remember the Viserys forced him to give up his very first child-to-be...

Why are you blaming Rhaenyra's kids' deaths on Daemon of all people?! How the heck was Daemon supposed to magically prevent the greens from plotting behind closed doors or magically tape Alicent's mouth shut, trapping her in her room, etc.--bc you'd have to do that to get her away from Viserys and from influencing the entire court. Did you expect Daemon to fight all the political games for Rhaenyra? That was Rhaenyra's role and her thing for the most part, and why not?

Why would you want to take that way from her to make it "the man's" job, when it simply doesn't fit this guy. Because Daemon, as the man, is supposed to protect her from absolutely everything?! Let Rhaenyra have her agency, please, and recognize that Daemon absolutely supports her without trying to overpower her or make major decisions without her approval.

Finally, "sacrifice" entails that the person marches the victim to death knowing that they will die or be seriously harmed. Rhaenyra at no point was willing or expected to lose any of her kids or pass them in exchange for power. Time and time again, she expressly forbade them from being put in danger, esp after Luyke's unexpected death. The first time leads into what I mentioned above about Daemon saying that the black council needs to form a plan without sending dragon riders to KL to burn it down and the last was when her youngest Velaryon boy Joffrey wanted to go to the Dragonpit to save all their dragons.

No, Rhaenyra's sons were taken from her at her and the blacks' unguarded moments, circumstances where they thought they were safer (Luke was going as an envoy, should have been protected, everyone expected so; Jacaerys died trying to bring his younger brother back and so soon after he had just got the dragon seeds; Joffey sneaked out to ride Syrax not knowing he shouldn't have). Another pattern.

[EDIT (12/20/23)]: I think ] You know, I finally sensed the pattern: you hate Daemon bc you think he failed at being the ultra-protective man's man and making sure he stayed your idea of the ideal family man-warrior. Not because you think he's a predator, but because you think he does not succeed in his self-ordained "duty" and social "duty" to his family....without seeing his own vulnerabilities or disadvantages.

You: "And when bearing this inhuman tidal wave of grief got to be a little too hard for her husband to deal with, he ran off on a probable suicide mission with a plucky and naive 16 year old dragonrider and left his wife and their son out to dry. This is a world-destroying betrayal and revelation to deal with for Rhaenyra..."

And Daemon should what? Travel back to KL to hold her tight & reassure her, when he's on a mission to kill Aemond and ensure Rhaenyra's win? Possibly lose the opp to kill Aemond in his departure?

Isn't that also "treasonous", to abandon your own mission? Again, he died killing the guy who presented one of the biggest obstacles to his wife. What are we saying here? Where are our prioirites or knowledge of the pressures of possible treason, a continuous motif in this story?!

After listing all the problems and challenges Rhaenyra still has after taking KL--one of them being Aemond in the riverlands--this is how he gets to go out with Nettles "Rhaenyra Triumphant":

All the language directs us to see that Rhaenyra is the one to send Daemon out with Nettles to defeat Aemond. Because she was the one giving approval and permission on how to deal with Aemond, Aegon, Storm's end, and all the traitors around her. "Queen Rhaenyra was adamant". It all suggests that this talk occurred in a council meeting. Especially after this, we learn that Alicent heard of Rhaneyra's decision to execute and kill her sons and thus went directly to her to negotiate for their lives. To Rhaenyra.

You: "...and she cannot deal with it, so she just decides to blame Nettles and try to get her killed. She literally cannot believe that her husband would do this to her, it has to be 16 year-old Nettles’ fault, the slut, the tramp, the temptress who led her man astray".

...Saying that misogynoir/blood purity totally comes from grief and paranoia is ridiculous. The paranoia makes her default to this and relies on it, but it doesn't inspire its very existence.

Racism makes you hostile to vulnerable groups and individuals, blaming them for stuff not their fault whatsoever because it reaffirms a sense of privilege, power, and control when they lose things on account of another trait (gender, poverty, instead of race: white poor people are not criminalized/animalized like black "mid-class" or poor people, so poor white people have a sort of "fallback" and expectation of privilege that makes them even more susceptible to rich Republican politicians...it is still a privilege).

Why are we letting Rhaenyra off the hook for her going after Nettles even with her grief? This is where I can't say she was not accountable or that she had a justified excuse. Nettles nor what happens to her should be brushed aside for Rhaenyra's pain, bc Nettles definitely did nothing for her to almost become a victim of Mysaria or Rhaenyra's actions/envy/suspicion.

I am not saying that Rhaenyra didn't have her troubles or that she wasn't plotted against nearly from preteen-hood (I argued that her grief and paranoia are built from these very things multiple times). However, the thing about Rhaenyra's grief is that while it's understandable, we know where it comes from, and it thematically shares some elements as Othello's fears and envy, in the narrative's bones & direction there are inevitable consequences to a distrusting/trusting certain folk (Daemon and Desdemona; Mysaria and Iago) around you or at least thinking your way through solutions in the purely mechanical sense. That is what is tragic about it--the paradoxical nuanced yet simple kind.

[the first example for la-phaecienne of Tumblr] Oedipus didn't know his wife was also his mom Jocasta, but there were consequences to him marrying her & having kids anyway. Achilles didn't know Patrocles would go out in his armor and run towards Hector, but that's what happened and he lost his best friend/lover after he refused to fight for the Greeks in his own prideful, semi-understandable rage against Agamemnon. Antigone buries her relatives despite clear instructions from her superior's orders not to because she thinks it is the only moral thing to do and still loses her life (she was right, too). Compelling stories are those that present us with existential, self-conflicting stories like these where characters struggle to make decisions/advocate for themselves/a particular philosophy/ideology without having critical information, abilities, or resources--whether or not it's their fault or not or being at the right place at the necessary time. There are consequences for one's actions no matter what.

No, race doesn't exist in the exact same way in ASoIaF world as in the real modern world, but we absolutely know that Rhaenyra's publicized reasons for executing Nettles have a lot to do with using the "darker=less attractive and yet also alluring-b/c-so-"different"-so-maybe-witchcraft" ideology that moves white Europeans and white American societies towards developing the Jezebel stereotype. Which is a racial phenomenon and should be treated as such, instead of going in bad faith.

#asoiaf asks to me #daemon targaryen #nettles #daemon and nettles #fire and blood characters #asoiaf grooming #mysaria #mysaria's characterization #mysaria and daemon #mysaria and nettles #fire and blood

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teamtargaryenapologinist · 1 year

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Aemond “One-Eye” Targaryen Series

The Silver Dragon (Ongoing)

Summary: Rhea Royce had suffered for too long at the hands of her husband. She knew she would not survive his final revenge, but she would not let him forget her. So she left him with a daughter, a girl with the white hair of a Targaryen and the slate grey eyes of a Royce - Arianwyn, the Silver Lady.With the girl’s mother gone, and her father swiftly remarried and off across the Narrow Sea before even acknowledging his daughter, the young Queen Alicent Hightower took the babe in, to be raised among the only family she had left. As she grows, Arianwyn remains close to all her cousins, whether they have white or black hair. But none is closer to her than Aemond. The two spend long nights in the palace library together, studying the histories of both Old Valyria and the First Men, seeking to understand who they are and where their places are.As tensions in the family rise, it seems as though their places may begin to diverge. Will they let themselves be pulled apart as the dragons dance?

1: The Bronze Bitch’s Daughter 2: The Bench 3: The Book 4: Rune of Endurance 5: The Funeral 6: Cold Fire 7: The Beach 8: The Tunnel 9: The Decisions of Fathers 10: Prayer 11: Dearest Friend 12: The Girl in the Tower 13: The Sapphire 14: The Garden Chapter 15: A Holy SightChapter 16: The Legend of Gahaelon and Aeremys 17: Families Chapter 18: The Petition

Blood of My Blood (Ongoing)

Summary: The heir to the Iron Throne gives birth to her firstborn children, Prince Jacaerys Velaryon and Princess Y/N Velaryon.

Pairing(s): Jacaerys Velaryon x Twin!Reader, Aemond Targaryen x Niece!Reader, Aegon Targaryen x Niece!Reader

Prologue Chapter One Chapter Two Chapter Three Chapter Four Chapter Five Chapter Six Chapter Seven Chapter Eight Chapter Nine Chapter Ten

Lady Strong

Summary: It’s not easy being a Strong; with a mother who committed suicide, a father who sired three children out of wedlock and then died for it, and a creepy uncle who has nefarious plans for his niece, it’s hard to find people who truly mean the best for you. Luckily there are your brothers and your fiance… right?

Part 1

A Fair Exchange

Summary: the youngest daughter of king Viserys and Aemma Arryn is betrothed to prince Aemond and no everybody is happy about it.

Prologue Part one Part two Part three* Part four* Part five Part six* Part seven

First and Seconds

Aegon I’s third wife is born again.

PART ONE PART TWO CONCEPT ONE FIRSTS AND SECONDS PART THREE

The Misbegotten Child

Summary: Rhea gives birth to a daughter. Daemon ignores her for most of her life. The Greens raise her.

Prologue Chapter One Chapter Two Chapter Three Chapter Four Chapter Five Chapter Six Chapter Seven Chapter Eight Chapter Nine Chapter Ten Chapter Eleven Chapter Twelve Chapter Thirteen Chapter Fourteen Chapter Fifteen Chapter Sixteen Chapter Seventeen Chapter Eighteen Chapter Nineteen Chapter Twenty Chapter Twenty One Epilogue

The Queen and Her Husbands

Summary: Greens wins AU. Rhaenyra Targaryen is dead, the war seems to be over but that doesn’t mean there is peace. Your relationship with Aemond is strained after he killed your brother and he will leave you for Alys Rivers. As if that wasn’t enough, now you have to marry Aegon, your mother’s killer, to bring peace to the kingdom and stop Cregan Stark from continuing the war.

Part 1: We’ll Be Fine Part 2: The Council Part 3: Give Me A Chance Part 4: I Wish That Too Part 5: The Wedding Part 6: Antidote

Drabbles:

You Can Do It: The Twins are born. Aemond isn’t by your side but Aegon is.

Dad Aemond

Fool Me Once

Summary: Despite learning about Aemond cheating on you, life has never been sweeter. Who knew being so bad could be so good.

Part one Part two Part three

When Pride Married Prejudice

Summary: she is the (only) trueborn daughter of Princess Rhaenyra Targaryen and Lord Laenor Velaryon. after her younger brother, Lucerys, slices out the eye of their uncle, Aemond Targaryen, her hand is offered as payment to keep the peace. though unexpected, she finds herself in a loving marriage, until devastating news forces her to make an impossible choice.

When Pride Married Prejudice [ part two ]

It Feels Like (the Very) First Time [ part two ]

Petitions Distraction The Inky Green Council Bearer of Bad News

alternate ending one: Kin Slayer • [ part two ]

alternate ending two: Sweetest Devotion • [ part two ]

guide to final alternate endings:

Kin Slayer – is for those in the slutty angst club ‘cause i’m comin’ for your feelings. reader is Team Black.

Sweetest Devotion – is for those who crave closure and comfort. reader is Team Green.

Exile

Summary: Your mother had informed you of your betrothal to Prince Aemond around your name-sake day. She informed you that your grandsire had made this decision. Featuring Alys Rivers

Part 1 Part 2

And Winter Came

Summary: You had been happy at King’s Landing. The happiest any Stark had ever been that far south.

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3

The Other Woman

Summary: You were overjoyed with your marriage to Aemond, unfortunately for you— he doesn’t feel the same way. You will always be the other woman.

The Other Woman Retribution Repentance Appatent Enamoured

Don’t Get Sad, Get Even

Summary: You and your House Dressed Up for Revenge.

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3

Growing Pains

Summary: They say it’s always the dark before sunrise, and Aemond and Y/N have more than earned to bask in the sunlight of their love. But, will everything go as smooth as they would hope to? Will the Prince and the Princess get the happily ever after they deserve? Or will they burn for each other apart?

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4

Blood of My Blood and Kin of Mine

Summary: Aemond falls in love with a woman already married. Not that anything ever gets in his way.

Summary: Aemond has his family, now he must keep them safe

Blood of my Blood Part 2 Part 3

Kin of Mine Kin of Sorrow

Have You No Idea That You’re In Deep?

Summary: Aemond is a fearless, enigmatic prince and the most renowned dragon-rider of the Greens. You are a (newly widowed) daughter of House Mormont and a lady-in-waiting to Princess Helaena. You can’t ignore each other, even though you probably should. In fact, you might have found a love worth killing for.

Chapter 1: Moonstone Chapter 2: The Same Agony Chapter 3: I Have Claimed You Chapter 4: Under The Heart Tree Chapter 5: I’m Coming Back Chapter 6: You Are In Battle Chapter 7: Final Tribute Chapter 8: Starfall

prūmia va perzys (heart on fire)

Summary: The reader is Aemond's lover, but when the civil war broke out, she sided with the Blacks, supporting Rhaenyra's claim to the throne. One night, she and Aemond meet, and attempt to make the other see reason.

don’t you love me? and what of your love? the flames that divide the aftermath

Little Secrets

Summary: She’s his sisters handmaiden, Highborn, but not high enough. He’s a Prince of the House of the Dragon, destined to marry someone of higher birth than her. This, them, can be their secret for just a little bit longer.

One Two Three

Love is Blind

Summary: Aemond meeting and befriending the reader after she finds him crying over the cruel comments of his missing eye by the servants of the Red Keep. Reader is from a noble family and completely blind, a bit of a renowned sweetheart as well.

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 3.5 Part 4 Part 4.5 Part 5

Blood of The Dragon

Summary: There is a small rocky island in the Narrow Sea easily reached on dragonback, and it has become a home of many secrets for Aemond Targayen and Rhaenyra Targaryen's only daughter

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4

A Fair Exchange

Summary: From one day to the other, her uncle's ambivalence had turned to cruelty until Aemond Targaryen's presence was enough to make her cower. But when she comes face to face with him in the halls of Storm's End, she has to be braver than she ever thought herself capable to protect her little brother.

Part I Part II Part III Part IV Part V Part VI Part VII Part VIII Part IX Part X

Forget Me Too

Summary: When the faithful abandon their duty…what is it that remains? When Aemond return home from yet another visit to see Alys and their son, he finds that there are consequences to his infidelity. Consequences he not only did not expect, but does not like.

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6

An Eye for an Eye

Summary: Aemond and Alicent are determined to even the score...only does he still?

Part 1 Part 2

you can pretend it's not meant to be (but you can't stay away from me)

Summary: to you, he is fictional. but to him, you are everything and more. he can't live without you. and, really, there is no use in trying to run away, he'll always find you.

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3

Season of the Witch

Summary: Aemond gets more than he bargained for when he chooses his spoil of war at Harrenhal.

Part 1

Playing with Fire

Summary: You travel to the capital, as Prince Aegon intends to take a wife at the command of the King. Much to your surprise, more than one Targaryen prince catches your eye.

Part 2

For Ever By Your Side

Summary: King's Landing was in a celebratory mood. People celebrated Princess Helaena Targaryen's first name day. The little princess was barely aware of the celebrations held in her honor. Slept peacefully in the care of her governess.

Prologue Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9

Part 10 Part 11 Part 12 Part 13

Waiting For A Lifetime

Summary: Overcome by grief, Daemon turned to black magic to revive you. Moved by pity, the witch who casted the spell promised you would live until you met your love again in his next life.

Part 1 Part 2

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silver-tooth-the-panther · 5 months

Text

(This was requested by @muzansmissingspiderlily. I hope you enjoy this! By the way, Kōkai means regret in Japanese.)

Sins of The Fathers

(A Demon Slayer Vore Fic)

Warnings: Suicide attempt, guilt and regret, soft vore

Word Count: 810

The young black-haired boy stood upon the cliff. He was waiting for the sun to rise, but it wasn’t for human reasons. This boy, Kōkai, was the son of the former Demon King, Muzan Kibutsuji. He was the only one of his father’s children to know of the monstrosities that he had committed and the regret and guilt had slowly devoured him.

Kōkai had officially escaped his father’s grasp right before the demon slayers defeated him. He had no clue that the demon society had changed due to Tanjiro taking the throne. Unfortunately, the guilt of knowing that his father had slain so many innocents was tearing him apart. The young boy outcasted himself and only chose to eat animals to control his demon urges.

However, Kōkai’s guilt grew too strong for the young boy to handle. That is how he found himself here, waiting to be burned away by the sun. “I’m so sorry.” He said to himself with a voice coated in sorrow and sincerity. “Sorry for what?” A deep, yet warm voice spoke through the darkness of the forest. Kōkai jumped with fright.

“Be not afraid..my dear child.” The voice’s owner then stepped out of the bushes. He was a tall man with long black hair, which seemed to have red tips. The man wore a purple and black kimono and a black hakana that firmly tightened with white cloth. Undoubtedly, the man’s strangest feature was his eyes. He had six of them! All of them red with yellow pupils. This man was none other than..Kokusibo, the Uppermoon One demon.

Kōkai had met this demon before, but only once. It was when he accidentally found out his father was a monster. The young boy had gotten lost in the Infinity Castle during one of Muzan’s meetings. There, he stumbled upon his father, conversing with his fellow demons on the different ways they could kill the Hashira. So, he did have good blood with Kokushibo.

“Why are you here? Did my father send you?” Kōkai asked, gritting his teeth. Kokushibo raised his hand, indicating for him to be quiet. “Not at all..dear child..Your father..is gone.” His voice was oddly gentle and sympathetic, which was unlike the stoic and cold voice that Kōkai had heard previously. “Well good riddance! That man was nothing, but a monster!”

Kōkai turned back to the horizon. The sun’s rays were starting to come up. Kokushibo then seemingly started to panic. “Young one..you’ll die if you stay out here..you need to hide!” The young boy shook his head. “You don’t care for my well being! You’re a man eating demon!” Kokushibo sighed with a heavy heart. “I have committed many sins..but things are different now..our new leader forbids us to eat humans..and we’ve become better people because of him.”

Kōkai looked away from him. “Even if that’s true, that doesn’t make what my father did any less evil.” The sun slowly started to rise. “Yes..but it is not your burden to bear!” Kokushibo realized that the boy wasn’t listening to him, so he did the only thing he could do. The six-eyed half-demon rushed towards the boy. He blocked Kōkai’s body from the sun with his own. “Wha-? What are you doing?!”

Kokushibo didn’t respond. He picked up the young boy, opened his maw, and put him inside. “Hey! Stop!” Kōkai struggled against the soft, purple muscles of Kokushibo’s throat. His struggles were fruitless and it only quickened his journey to Kokushibo’s belly.

Due to the drastic size difference, Kōkai didn’t leave much of a mark on Kokushibo’s body. The large demon sighed in relief and rubbed his stomach. “It’s alright..little one…You’re safe now..” Kōkai tried his best to escape the pouch-like organ. “What do you mean?! You ate me!” Kokushibo made a soft, yet sad rumble. “You will not be harmed..I’m merely keeping you out of the sun..”

Kōkai exhausted himself and curled up into a ball. “I deserve it. My father hurt so many innocent lives.” Kokushibo’s heart broke into pieces. He didn’t want the boy to suffer like this. “It is not your fault..They were his actions..not yours..you are not anything like your father…you..are not a monster.”

They boy closed his eyes and listened to the soft gurgles of Kokushibo’s stomach and his heartbeat. These sounds coupled with the warmth and softness of his belly greatly soothed Kōkai. “Are you sure that the demons don’t eat humans anymore?” Kokushibo nodded. “I’m certain..” Kōkai smiled and rubbed the stomach walls around him. “Alright, thank you.”

Kokushibo smiled to himself as he started to walk off. “Of course..little one…You’ll be adored..by the kingdom..” He placed a protective hand over his stomach as he started to head back to the kingdom that he loved dearly.

#half-demon! tanjiro au #comfort vore #safe vore #soft vore #vore writing #demon slayer vore

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haggishlyhagging · 1 year

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A much more striking connection between the 2017 attacks, as far as I was concerned, wasn't listed in the report. Four of the five attackers had a history of domestic abuse, amounting to a catalogue of verbal and physical attacks on female relatives and, in the case of the Manchester bomber, Salman Abedi, a brutal assault on a young woman who was in his class at college; the figure rises to five out of six if we include Osborne, the right-wing extremist who drove a hired van into worshippers leaving a mosque in north London. Less information has emerged about the family relationships of the remaining attacker, Khuram Butt, but we know that he displayed a somewhat detached view of fatherhood; Butt led the suicide attacks on London Bridge and Borough Market a matter of weeks after his wife had given birth to their second child. Another of the men in Butt's cell, Rachid Redouane, had a daughter aged seventeen months at the time he was shot dead by armed police, demonstrating a readiness to abandon infants which will figure in the biographies of a number of the perpetrators who appear in this book.

The patriarchal assumptions common among such men, who seek to control every aspect of the lives of their wives and children, extend neither to considering their long-term welfare nor to protecting them from the consequences of horrific public acts of violence. It is a chilling view of family relationships in which becoming a husband and father appears to have more to do with confirming a man's status - and acquiring residency rights, in some cases - than forming close attachments. The widows and children of terrorists have to live not just with grief and loss but with the notoriety of their male relatives, even in cases where they themselves were the first victims of an escalating species of male violence.

The wider pattern of terrorists with a history of domestic abuse certainly isn't limited to the UK: in the couple of years before the 2017 attacks, I kept noticing that the perpetrators of some of the most notorious terrorist attacks in Europe and the US had first been violent towards wives and girlfriends. Domestic violence turned up in the background of the security guard who attacked the Pulse nightclub in Florida (forty-nine dead, fifty-three injured), the lorry driver who drove into crowds in Nice on Bastille day (eighty-six dead, 458 injured), the elder of the two brothers responsible for the Boston marathon bombing (three dead, several hundred injured) and a fraudster who took hostages in a café in Sydney in December 2014 (two dead, three injured).

Critics will say that is to be expected, given that we are talking about a cohort of violent men, but that is my point: male violence doesn't stay in neat categories. Persistent offenders tend to have convictions for a whole range of violent offences, as I show in chapter two, and I'm suggesting that men who are used to beating, kicking, choking and stabbing women at home are considerably further along the road towards committing public acts of violence. Police and paramedics who have attended incidents of extreme domestic violence, coming upon a scene of injured women and children, pools of blood and overturned furniture, will recognise similarities with the aftermath of a marauding terrorist attack; these are men who have practised behind closed doors, relishing the sensation of holding the power of life or death over family members and becoming desensitised to the horrible effects of violence.

-Joan Smith, Home Grown: How Domestic Violence Turns Men Into Terrorists

#Joan smith #male violence #domestic terrorism #domestic abuse #terrorist attack #patriarchy #vawg #vaw #males are incompatible with health #female separatism

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harrison-abbott · 27 days

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Many of us know the story about how Hitler was rejected from art college as a young man, having dreamed of being an artist since boyhood.

Joseph Goebbels’ biography shows a similarity. In that, he wanted to be a playwright and novelist in his early twenties. His material was rejected by publishers across Germany, and by the age of 27, he had given up with fiction completely.

Goebbels was also born with a limp. A disability that was congenital.

In latter life he would lie to his peers, claiming that he had suffered a permanent injury whilst fighting during World War I. When, in fact, he was never a soldier in the German army. He was actually rejected for military service due to his condition.

In his late 20s, he met Adolf in Munich, who was then an up-and-coming speaker. Goebbels saw him as a force that he wanted to be part of, which began a friendship that would continue for the next two decades.

His desire to be ‘close’ to Hitler often caused friction and jealousy between Albert Speer and Herman Goering, who both wanted the same thing.

On May 1st, Goebbels committed suicide with his wife, having served one day as Nazi Germany’s Chancellor. Before his suicide, he poisoned his six children with cyanide.

#world war 2 #history #brutal history #world war two

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scotianostra · 2 years

Photo

Poet George Mackay Brown was born in Stromness, Orkney, on 17th October 1921.

Hailed as one of the greatest Scottish writers of the twentieth century. A prolific poet, admired by such fellow poets as Ted Hughes and Seamus Heaney, he was also an accomplished novelist, dramatist and a master of the short story. Bar a brief period in Edinburgh, where he associated with the ‘Rose Street’ crowd including Hugh MacDiarmid, Norman MacCaig and others, Mackay Brown spent most of his life in Orkney, and his work is saturated with references to his native islands. As Seamus Heaney wrote, in Mackay Brown’s work everything was passed ‘through the eye of the needle of Orkney’.

George Mackay Brown was the youngest of six children of John Brown, tailor and postman, and Mhairi Mackay, a Gaelic speaker. He grew up in fairly straitened circumstances as his father was unable to work through illness. Mackay Brown himself suffered from tuberculosis as a young man. In his twenties he worked as a journalist on the Orkney Herald.

During his early years Stromness was a “dry island”, there was no licensed premises, in 1920, the temperance movement voted the town ‘dry’ and it remained that way until 1947. And so it was 1948 aged 27 he first taste alcohol of which he wrote 1948 Mackay Brown first tasted alcohol, which he found to be “a revelation; they flushed my veins with happiness; they washed away all cares and shyness and worries. I remember thinking to myself ‘If I could have two pints of beer every afternoon, life would be a great happiness’ Subsequently, alcohol played a considerable part in his life, although he says, "I never became an alcoholic, mainly because my guts quickly staled”

Now a lot of posts you here of famous Scots entering University at very young ages, Mackay Brown is the exception, the the age of 30 he left the Orkney Isles for the first time to continue his education.

He a mature student at Newbattle Abbey Collegewhere he met the poet Edwin Muir who encouraged his writing and wrote the introduction to Mackay Brown’s first full collection of poems. He went on to study English at Edinburgh University, graduating in 1960.

Now I touched upon the alcohol thing earlier and where else in Edinburgh at in those days would an aspiring poet go? Of course it was Milnes Bar and into the company of Hugh MacDiarmid, Norman MacCaig and the likes. He met and fell in love with Stella Cartwright described as the bars muse was she was lover to a number of Scottish poets, they were briefly engaged but kept in touch until she passed away in 1985.

After his graduation Mackay Brown, who was prone to sickness,due to having previously suffered from tuberculosis decided to return home, living with his mother until her paassing, Despite almost continual ill-health he continued to write and gained numerous prizes for his work as well as post graduate work. He has been dubbed the Orkney Bard. His weekly column which ran for more than 25 years in The Orcadian from 1971 is in print in book form and gives an insight into his Stromness routines and his observations on a changing Orkney.

Throughout his life he not only had the bronchial problems but also suffered depression, this seems to have been an affliction that beset his family, his Uncle’s body was fished out of Stromness harbour in 1935 and it is thought he committed suicide, he himself spent almost a decade fighting his demons, while also having physical health problems, in 1981 he was given the last rights by his priest.

George Mackay Brown wrote 15 collections of poetry, 9 short story collections, 6 novels, 2 plays, 9 collections of essays,biographies and journals, some published posthumously.

He survived his near death encounter in 1981, his 1994 novel, Beside the Ocean of Time, was shortlisted for Booker Prize and judged Scottish Book of the Year by the Saltire Society.

Mackay Brown passed away on 13 April 1996 aged 73 after a short illness. For a man who spent his life writing about Orkney it was rather fitting that his funeral on April 16th coincided with the Feast of St Magnus, patron saint of Orkney.

I love this quote from the man…….

“In Scotland, when people congregate, they tend to argue and discuss and reason; in Orkney, they tell stories.”

Further than Hoy by George Mackay Brown

Further than Hoy

the mermaids whisper

through ivory shells

a-babble with vowels

Further than history

the legends thicken

the buried broken

vases and columns

Further than fame

are fleas and visions,

the hermit’s cave

under the mountain

Further than song

the hushed awakening

of country children

the harp unstroked

Further than death

your feet will come

to the forest, black forest

where Love walks, alone.

#Scotland #scottish #poet #writer #Orkney #orcadian #history #literary figure

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lanbichenbunny · 1 year

Text

The Death of Madam Lan

I can’t help but wonder about Madam Lan.

what did she die of?

She died of illness.

I doubt it, I think her boys, even as young as they were would have noticed, if she was getting ill. She could have suddenly become ill though, I admit that.

There were rumours of her being ill, but those were spread by the Lans themselves, so no one would question why they never saw her.

2. A revenge killing.

Someone most likely a Lan killed her, for killing a teacher. Again I doubt this.

Why wait six years?

Also the Lans are known to be largely peaceful, I’m not saying that a born Lan would commit murder. I just think it’s highly unlikely.

3. Suicide

Lan Xichens memories of her are happy ones, but he and Lan Zhan were so young. Most parents put on a happy front for their children and hide what they don’t want them to see.

She was under house arrest, isolated in a by herself. Her sons were taken from her the day they were born.

If that alone isn’t depressing, I don’t know what is.

She killed a teacher and might have had something against, the teachings of the Lans.

Every time her sons visit her, they’re a bit more Lan like. Especially Lan Zhan. They get to a certain age and start wearing their headbands and being taught the Lan way of life.

I believe she never asked about what they were learning. (I can’t remember if that was just the TV show or the books.)

Again this suggests she had problems with the Lan teachings, her boys weren’t just becoming Lans. They were being prepared to lead the Lan clan.

It must have broken her heart, to see it happen and know she can’t runaway with them. She’d be tracked down and caught if she tried.

Maybe some sad part of her, thought it might be best to die when they’re young so she didn’t have to watch them grow up as Lans.

#lan zhan #lan wangji #mdzs #lan xichen #mxtx fandom #the untamed #cql #madam lan #lan clan #twin jades

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unolvrs · 2 years

Note

piece of media that made you cry/affected you the most ?

the first things that keep popping in my head are anime movies / series, so that's what i'm going with. but to be fair, i cry over everything. so there's that...

sayonara no asa ni yakusoku no hana o kazarô (2018) ━━ drama, fantasy

Maquia is a member of a special race called the Iorph—mystical beings who can live for hundreds of years and remain separate from the lives and daily troubles of mankind. However, Maquia has always felt lonely despite being surrounded by her people, as she was orphaned from a young age. She daydreams about the outside world, but dares not travel from her home due to the warnings of the clan's chief. One day however, the outside world finds her, as the power-hungry kingdom of Mezarte invades her homeland. They already have what is left of the giant dragons, the Renato, under their control, and now their king wishes to add the immortality of the Iorph to his bloodline. The humans and their Renato ravage the Iorph homeland and kill most of its inhabitants. Caught in the midst of the attack, Maquia is carried off by one of the Renato that has gone berserk. It soon dies, and she is left deserted in a forest far from home, now truly alone save for the cries of a single baby off in the distance. Maquia finds the baby in a destroyed village and decides to raise him as her own, naming him Ariel. Although she knows nothing of the human world, how to raise a child that ages much faster than her, or how to live with the smoldering loneliness inside, she is determined to make it all work somehow.

as someone with severe mommy issues and as someone obsessed with writing about mothers, this ruined me. i literally recommend this to every person i have ever met. i'm pretty sure i watched this, like, 1231081291 times already and every single time i watch it, i end up bawling my eyes out. my favorite character is leilia. you'll know why when you watch it. the complexity of leilia just made me wow, holy shit.

there was this one time i watched this with a friend. it was my second time watching it but it was my friend's first... and we ended up crying halfway into the movie.

colorful (2010) ━━ drama, slice of life, supernatural

Upon arriving at the train station of death, an impure soul is granted a second chance at life against his will. Reincarnating into the body of Makoto Kobayashi, a 14-year-old boy who recently committed suicide, the soul is tasked to identify the boy's greatest sin in life within a time limit of six months. Although it remains reluctant toward continuing life as Makoto, the soul soon begins to notice the complexities of people's emotions and actions.

when i watched this when i was a pre-teen, this destroyed me. istg who told me this was a good movie to watch bc i was a child. there are actually a fair share of criticisms this anime had because it 'didn't delve into the characters deeper' but imo, that's the point of the story because at the end of the day, the main character is just a fourteen-year-old, and they're looking at the world in a way a child does. anyway, this made me cry a lot.

shinsekai yori (2012) ━━ drama, horror, mystery, sci-fi, supernatural

In the town of Kamisu 66, 12-year-old Saki Watanabe has just awakened to her psychic powers and is relieved to rejoin her friends—the mischievous Satoru Asahina, the shy Mamoru Itou, the cheerful Maria Akizuki, and Shun Aonuma, a mysterious boy whom Saki admires—at Sage Academy, a special school for psychics. However, unease looms as Saki begins to question the fate of those unable to awaken to their powers, and the children begin to get involved with secretive matters such as the rumored Tainted Cats said to abduct children.

before you ask, no. this didn't make me cry. this just fucked me over and affected me so deeply i didn't know what to do after i watched it. another anime i watched when i was wayyy too young because i googled 'underrated animes'. i was, once again, a pre-teen. this messed me up a lot. i had no idea what was going on most of the time and one moment, nice things are happening, and the next, everything's messed up. still part of my top ten animes though. to say this is unique is an understatement. peak japanese anime.

little busters (2012) & little busters: refrain (2013) ━━ comedy, drama, romance, slice of life, supernatural

As a child, Riki Naoe shut himself from the world, thanks to a diagnosis of narcolepsy following the tragic deaths of his parents. However, Riki is saved when, one fateful day, a boy named Kyousuke recruits him into a team who call themselves the Little Busters. Accompanied by Masato, Kengo, and Rin, these misfits spend their childhood fighting evil and enjoying their youth. Years pass, and even in high school, the well-knit teammates remain together. Kyousuke decides to re-ignite the Little Busters by forming a baseball team as it will be his last school year with them. They have a problem though: there aren't enough members! The tables have turned, for it is now Riki's turn to reach out and recruit new friends into the Little Busters, just like Kyousuke had once done for him. Then, an omen surfaces—Rin finds a strange letter attached to her cat, assigning them the duty of uncovering the "secret of this world" by completing specific tasks. Just what is this secret, and why is it being hidden? It's up to the Little Busters to find out!

this is one of the few animes that i can proudly say: the second season was better than the first. of course, that doesn't mean the first season was bad. in fact, it was good, but nowhere near as great as whatever the hell the second season was. until now, i still think about the ending and how much it made me cry, and the foreboding presence of "the secret" that was everywhere but nowhere at the same time.

adaptations back then hit different, man.

doraemon: stand by me 1 & 2 (2014 & 2022) ━━ comedy, sci-fi

Nobita Nobi is an elementary student who hates studying, is bad at sports, and does everything half-heartedly. He is a pushover, unlucky, and fearful of many things. His personality makes him a failure in life, even affecting his progeny. This causes his great-great-grandchild, Sewashi, to take control of the situation. Sewashi travels back in time from the 22nd century to the 20th century to meet Nobita, who is shocked to see him appear out of his drawer alongside a blue robotic cat. The robotic cat calls himself Doraemon, who claims to have been pressured by Sewashi to assist Nobita, with their ultimate goal being to provide Nobita happiness. Frustrated after seeing Nobita's hopeless state, Doraemon decides to go back to the future. However, Sewashi activates a program within Doraemon that prevents him from doing so. Forced to stay, Doraemon helps Nobita using futuristic gadgets through his four-dimensional pocket—a bag containing anything inside it. Can Doraemon bring Nobita happiness and return to the future?

STOP. I LOVE DORAEMON OKAY. THIS MADE ME CRY SO MUCH. anyone who disses doraemon will be blocked.

sajkdajdah idk what else to put... i'm probably gonna wake up tomorrow thinking i should have put other movies but for now, this is all i have. i cry over everything okay

#問 ━━ answers #申 ━━ recommendations

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