#chat about death and that

[billdecker]

I wrote about this a couple of days ago but I deleted it. It’s really personal. I’ve had two close members of my family die very close to members of the royal family. So this is about death, respect, and dignity, the difference between us and them, and all of this with the queen has brought up a lot of stuff for me and I have nowhere else to vent.

In June 1997, my Grandad died. He’d just retired and was on his first retirement holiday with my Nan. On the final day, he had a massive stroke. Two days later, he died. He wasn’t ill at all. He was a fit man. It came as a massive shock to us all and we all felt so lost because my Nan was alone. 

My two single aunties landed in the country just after he died. The govt of the country looked after my family incredibly well and with all the sensitivity that was needed. They gave my nan and aunts lots of support. Everything to do with my Grandad’s death on their side was handled impeccably. 

Then came his repatriation. 

Our govt wanted my Grandad to be cremated in the country because there was lots of red tape with bringing him home. My nan stood firm. We’re a huge family and the funeral needed to be at home. Because of superstition, my grandad had to be put on a commercial flight during the dark so that nobody would see. He was transported in a tin box, hidden in the plane. Nobody could know he was there except the people who would meet him. He was taken off the plane in the dark, again so he wouldn’t be seen. When he came home, my mum couldn’t say goodbye to her dad on advice of the undertaker because the air pressure had damaged him so badly. It further broke our hearts. It felt like he’d been treated as a piece of meat rather than a loved person. All of this took over two weeks to happen because of all sorts of stuff this govt’s end, and then we had to go through lots more stuff to do with the coroner’s court.  

Fast forward a couple of months and Princess Di died and she is bought home within a couple of days. Because she was the mother to an heir to the throne, she was given all these bells and whistles and dignity. She was not hidden in a plane in a tin box. I was 13 at the time and it infuriated my how just by design of birth and marriage someone was treated with a dignity and respect that my family were not afforded. 

I went back to school and a few weeks later a friend had a letter from William and Harry to thank her for writing to send her condolences. Over the summer, a friend of mine had lost her dad. She asked this other friend of ours where he condolenses were to her. The monarchist friend basically said that our friend wasn’t royalty so it didn’t matter. I don’t come from a monarchist family, but it cemented in me my distaste for them. 

Fast forward 25 years and 3 weeks ago my father-in-law died. We thought it was a peaceful death after he had developed pneumonia after having covid. We assumed that everything would be sorted as soon as it possibly could. His body has only just been released because the coroner has been having trouble getting responses from doctors with help. So an inquest has now got to happen. My husband is not only devastated in grief, but now he’s got on top of that the stress of not know when his father will be cremated for him to be returned to Ireland. But then there’s the Queen. From ten days of her death, she will have her funeral. Again, she is being treated with respect and so many other people are not in their death. 

And then there are people saying they feel like they’ve lost a member of their family. I remember people wailing when Diana died and thinking they surely must have no idea what it’s like to lose a loved one because how does it compare? How does that compare to me losing my beloved grandad? And now I’m seeing it all again with people sobbing about the queen and here is my husband who has actually lost his dad. 

I know this is really personal and I wish this place had filters like old LJ lol. I feel thankful that I have a dash full of people who feel the same way as I do about monarchy. I don’t know how I’d cope if I didn’t. The stuff you’ve been reblogging has really brought a smile to my face during this horrible time for us. 

#sorry for the length of this #chat about death and that

[anna-scribbles]

if the agrestes weren't rich i think that gabriel would be the normal one. like gabe's problem is that he stopped running into natural limits due to absurd wealth and his obsessive nature led him to develop some kind of god complex where he won't accept that anything is out of his control. I think that if gabe was broke again and just simply couldn't afford to go on an international goose chase for ancient magic artifacts of untold power, if he had to work a 9-5 to live and couldn't just disappear into his basement lair to commit domestic terrorism and say evil monologues to himself, then he would be way more normal. he'd just be some guy. he might even let himself have a mowhawk again. but I think that emilie would be way LESS normal if they weren't rich. like emilie needs so many people to be obsessed with her so much all the time in order for her to function. and gabe would still have his toxic codependent obsession with her, sure, but that wouldn't be nearly enough. emilie has to be at the center of the world's spotlight at all times because she doesn't know how to exist if she's not performing. anyway all this to say I am so certain that if the agrestes were not disgustingly wealthy, emilie agreste would one million percent be running a massive family vlogger youtube channel

#this post is sponsored by the version of emilie agreste who lives in my mind #in this scenario adrien still exists so maybe he's a normal baby somehow. but the important thing is that he's still exploited #this is just an exercise for me in thinking about how much of the agreste family dynamic you could preserve if they were middle class #how much wealth is an enabler of the terrible things happening in that house #but yeah agreste family vloggers au. I guess. #where adrien shows up at school and everybody knows him because his mom posted his potty training videos online and everything since #he has no secrets every milestone he's ever had has been packaged up and sold to the public #until he becomes chat noir of course. etc #oh god emilie would vlog her own death😭 help #get ready with me to die and haunt the narrative🤩 #ml #anna rambles #I wrote this because im not finishing my homework:(

[celluloidbroomcloset]

I've been thinking about this exchange between Izzy and Ed in "Discomfort in a Married State":

"For years I've followed your every whim, I've managed your increasingly erratic moods, I've massaged this crew when they were worried about your judgment—"

"Mm, sounds stressful, Izzy."

"It is."

Izzy has assigned himself the role of "managing" Blackbeard, but it's quite obvious, both in Ed's response and in the way he says it, that Ed has never wanted or expected him to. And he continues to try to manage Ed, even when Ed clearly tells him not to.

Both Ed and Stede have that word "whim" thrown at them by people who don't really understand them - Izzy and Mary - and both at first resist the word (Stede even says "I object to the word whim"), then internalize it. It seems what are being called whims by outsiders are actually expressions of deep desires that neither Ed nor Stede have the verbal or emotional language to describe.

It's not a whim that has Stede running off to a be a pirate - it's all the frustration and loneliness and repression - and it's not a whim to go back to Mary - it's a result of guilt and self-loathing. It's not a whim that has Ed following the Revenge to meet Stede - it's wanting to find someone who might be a kindred spirit. But neither of them can openly articulate those feelings, either to the people who are calling them whims or fully to themselves. Stede goes further than Ed does because so many of his desires are located in his repressed homosexuality, and once he's able to articulate that - with Mary's help - he understands his feelings. He still believes that he's "whim-prone" in other ways, but not when it comes to Ed.

Ed is especially leery about his own desires, which have been managed by other people for so long, and about Stede's. His idea to "run off to China" is a whim in a certain sense, but it's expressing a desire to leave behind their old identities and form something new together. His desire to "take it slow" is about his own healing independent of Stede, but it's also built on a fear that Stede is going to disappear again. After they have sex, Ed again falls into the fear that it was a whim, but it's not his whim - it's Stede's. He's scared that what meant so much to him doesn't mean as much to Stede, or not enough for Stede to be able to let go of piracy and fame. He's worried that piracy wasn't a whim, but he was.

Both of them have been managed most of their lives, in different ways and by people and structures that they never wanted to manage them in the first place. It was all about keeping them in settled, socially acceptable places where they can't escape, and casting doubt on the legitimacy of their desires. (I don't think Izzy, and certainly not Mary, consciously think of it in these terms, and Mary especially has had to subsume her own needs as much as Stede has.)

In the scene with Izzy, Ed's evidently pushing back at the management, and he probably has been for a while. But this is likely the first time where his desires are getting more articulated, after his conversation with Stede, and are the same moment when Izzy starts trying to exert even more control over him.

His finding the letter is a mirror to Stede's conversation with Mary - the realization of who he is and who the man he loves is, and that the feelings he's experienced not just for but from Stede are not whims but bone-deep love.

#ofmd #our flag means death #ofmd season 2 #stede bonnet #edward teach #mary bonnet #izzy hands #ed teach #blackbonnet #gentlebeard #gif #whim prone #ofmd meta #this was supposed to be a really short post but i cannot be brief apparently #my wee thoughts #thanks to anyone who reads these #i'm always happy to chat about 'em too!

[viperwhispered]

Too Hard

Woop part 2 of the trip inside Jamil's head. Part 1 here.

The next time Jamil caught sight of you on campus, his first instinct was to turn around on his heel.

What a stupid thought to have because of you.

Besides, that would only make him more conspicuous, not less.

So, when your eyes met his, Jamil gave you a short nod in greeting. He would’ve left it at that and kept on his way, had you not walked up to him.

“Hi Jamil! How’s it going?” you said with that impossibly disarming smile of yours.

Why was it so difficult to look at you like he normally would? You had no right to make him feel so stiff, so unnatural.

On autopilot, Jamil exchanged a few pleasantries with you - those lessons from his parents had been instilled too deep in him for him to falter too badly in a simple exchange such as this. Still, Jamil quickly excused himself by telling you he still had to find Kalim before his next class.

Jamil didn’t miss the way your smile faltered. Had you hoped to get something out of him?

“Oh, okay. I’ll see you two later, then.”

Something about that irked him, though Jamil did not allow himself to dwell on it further.

His heart really had no business still racing as it did when he walked away, unaware of the frown on his face.

Just act normal. That’s all he needed to do.

After all, he had no time for dwelling in silly fancies.

If Jamil had been acutely aware of you before, it only seemed to worsen now that he was making a conscious effort to not act any differently with you. In fact, the harder he tried to keep you out, the more you invaded his thoughts, unsettling him.

The most innocuous words from you looped in his mind, and even the simplest actions caught his eye. For goodness's sake, he’d found himself staring at you while you were queueing up in the cafeteria the other day, not even doing anything other than standing around and looking bored!

For once, Jamil found himself grateful for all his duties. At least they provided him with something else to occupy himself with.

After all, if he was busy enough, it was difficult to think about those bright eyes of yours, your sweet laugh, or the way you bit your lip while thinking.

Still, sometimes it felt like no matter which way he turned, you were there, ready to throw him off-kilter. Not like it was his fault that often the most convenient route to class intersected with your daily routines. Or that your face seemed to jump out from any crowd, catching his attention.

Which certainly did not help his basketball performance. Jamil certainly did not recall you having such an interest in sports before, yet suddenly you were always there, distracting him. What had changed?

Could you possibly-

Jamil scoffed to himself, forcing his thoughts back on track for the nth time that day.

He picked up the tray of food and started taking it to Kalim. After dinner, he’d need to help Kalim with his homework, there were some housewarden tasks that would need dealing with, not to mention the preparations for the next-

Jamil froze in his tracks.

The voice he heard was quiet, but it was unmistakably you.

Really, it should not have come as such a surprise to him. You had become a rather frequent visitor to Scarabia, and Kalim often invited you to stay for meals. In fact, Jamil had started planning the dorm’s meal prep with your tastes and dietary restrictions in mind, just in case.

Jamil rounded the corner with strange exhilaration, his heart fluttering needlessly.

Yet, his mood evaporated when he saw you.

Why did you stop talking and look so guilty as soon as you caught sight of Jamil?

Jamil knew that look you gave to Kalim, had used it himself a thousand times. The one telling Kalim to keep quiet about something.

What could there possibly be that you would be comfortable sharing with Kalim, but not with him? That would give Kalim reason to sit so close to you, a comforting hand on your shoulder?

Jamil's mind raced with possibilities, yet could not settle for any single explanation.

He’d have to ask Kalim about it later.

Jamil gave you a short, polite greeting, his eyes lingering on you in an attempt to read what you were hiding.

“If I’d known you were coming over, I would’ve prepared something for you to eat as well,” Jamil said, already thinking about which parts of the dorm’s dinner to spruce up for you.

“Oh, no need, just figured I’d pop by. I’ll get out of your hair soon enough,” you said, something sheepish about your expression.

As expected, Kalim asked you to stay and dine with them, and with just a bit more persuasion you agreed - though not before telling Jamil that he should join you too and have himself a breather.

And since Kalim agreed with you, Jamil soon found himself sharing a meal with you and Kalim. Yet, even as he sat down with the food, his mind raced.

Had you been getting particularly close to Kalim lately? But surely Jamil would’ve noticed such a thing. Maybe someone from the dorm had been giving you trouble? But if that was the case, then surely you could let Jamil know about it, too. Unless for some reason you did not want to? But if it was something that concerned Kalim, then sooner or later it was bound to concern Jamil, too.

All the while, Kalim was talking to you about this and that, the latest topic being the animals kept on the Asim estate.

“I’ve got some pictures, let me show you!” Kalim said with an excited grin.

Only, a thorough patting of his pockets and a look around confirmed that Kalim’s phone was nowhere to be seen.

Jamil pinched the bridge of his nose. Where had Kalim left it this time?

Before Jamil even had the chance to say that he would handle it, Kalim sprinted off. Jamil hesitated for a moment, automatically halfway up from his seat, before he decided that leaving a guest unattended would be a worse offense than not helping out his master.

Jamil slumped back down with a sigh, mentally tracing the path Kalim took today, trying to recall the last time he saw Kalim handle his phone.

“Breathe. He’ll manage,” you said. There was the faintest of smiles on your lips, and Jamil could not decide if it was knowing or amused. Perhaps both.

Somehow, despite his frustration, Jamil’s own lips wanted to curl up too.

“Hmm. Maybe he will.”

Sure, Jamil could’ve called Kalim’s phone, to make it easier to find, but it was not that urgent, was it?

Jamil took another bite of his food, keeping an eye on you from the corner of his eye.

How was his mind so empty and so buzzing at the same time?

“You know-”

“So-”

You looked at each other, both just as surprised that the other had spoken up at the same time.

Even your surprised look was so-

“You first,” Jamil said. The way you bit your lip... Jamil had to raise a cup to his lips, slowly sipping his drink.

“Just… Feels like it’s been quite a while since I’ve seen you be still, you know. Or exchanged more than two words with you,” you said. You were attempting a light, joking tone, yet it was quite clear there was more to it.

“You say that like it would be unusual for me to be busy.”

He was not prepared for the way your soft sigh tugged at his heartstrings.

“No. It is not.”

You were both quiet after, poking at your meals. Normally, Jamil would’ve cherished such a moment of peace, yet this particular silence between you two was decidedly awkward.

Where was your usual chatter? Why weren’t you looking at him like you usually did?

“If you’re worried about me, don’t. I’m fine,” Jamil said, some softness creeping into his tone despite his best intentions.

“That's what Kalim said too,” you said. Yet the way you looked at Jamil made it clear you were still skeptical.

Wait.

Had you clammed up earlier because it had been Jamil you had been talking about with Kalim? That Kalim had comforted you about?

The thought twisted his stomach into knots.

Eta: you can find part 3 here, part 4 here, and finally part 5 here. Hasdhfsdf the way I fought with that last scene I swear. I don't even want to know how many versions I went through, trying to figure out how to say what I wanted without rubbing it into your face or making it too veiled. The joys of trying to convey things through a limited pov. Hopefully it came out reasonably balanced in the end. Rip to all those sentences that were lovely on their own but didn’t work for the whole. Hopefully I can rehome y’all one day. I do have thoughts for part 3 and part x (might be some chapters between those two as well, who knows at this point), so maybe we'll see those at some point, too. Tag list: @colliope @crystallizsch @diodellet @jamilsimpno69 @jamilvapologist @twstgo If you'd like to be tagged for future works, let me know! (Just be aware that sometimes I do also write nsfw, though you can certainly ask to be tagged only for particular kinds of works.)

#twisted wonderland #jamil viper #twisted wonderland x reader #jamil viper x reader #ner writes #jamil definitely knows how to deal with his feels #also writing this is making me wonder how aware jamil is of his inner versus outer life #like he’s very aware of how he comes across because that’s what he’s been told to watch out for #but how well has he truly learned to understand himself and his own feelings wants etc? #(I mean as you can tell I’m assuming not very well) #originally this went to more of a “jamil hears just the wrong part of the conversation” route but #a) I kinda hate that trope especially when it’s dragged on beyond belief and #b) Kalim maybe doesn’t want to spill anyone’s secrets but he really is such an open book especially with Jamil so #also it’s not like jamil needs the extra help to catastrophize he already does that well enough on his own 🙃 #tho then I went a little too far in the other direction and had to pull back #but let's just hope I didn't edit this to death by now #also also: since I seem to have a bit of a naming theme going on for this series #if I were to be the sort to go for the angst route what part would definitely be titled Too Late or something along those lines #also x3 but loved folks commenting on that part about reader being inoffensive in the first part #I certainly had fun writing that line #(and in general extra love to everyone who leaves comments on tags replies wherever always great to read those) #(and in general chat with y'all)

[teabutmakeitazure]

Casper has this thing where he masks his lovestruck gazes with a comically raised brow. At first, he was indulging himself shamelessly, wistfully staring at you from wherever he's settled with a gaze softer than cotton candy and a blush slowly creeping up on his cheeks. He made sure you would not, under any circumstance, catch him in the act, yet he horribly messed up while you were on a phone call with your friend.

Hands animatedly emphasising your words to no one in particular, the phone remained pressed to your ear between your head and shoulder as you paced around your bedroom. Casper secretly sat himself on the little dining table in the kitchen (the one he hauled up the stairs in one go just to prove a point), face resting in his palm as he watches you vivaciously explain workplace politics to your friend in the distance. He could care less about the drama going on at work, for he is fixated on you.

Casper feels a smile tugging on his lips, and that's when he realises he's blushing. from your grin to your occasional giggle and the way you're pacing as you talk, he can't help but feel so... so... in love. he was right. You really are a woman after his heart, but now you hold it in your grasp and he does not want you to return it.

He stays like that for a while, and though he wishes to move closer, to perhaps even grab you from behind and kiss you, he remains where he is, watching you with the most lovestruck gaze in fear of being endlessly teased by you. However, he freezes out of embarrassment when you turn on your heel without warning and lock eyes with him. Shit. This time, the blush on his face deepens out of awkwardness and the smile on your face widens because you caught him in the act. No, he will never admit to you that he loves to watch you as you go by your day and do mundane tasks. he simply never will.

Since then, he's made a point to always have a more relaxed posture. Arms crossed over his chest, anything but a smile on his face, and an eyebrow comically raised in question. This is the replacement he has found for the usual face he makes while watching you. He hopes you ignore the way his eyes still lovingly look at you.

#he's so babygirl i swear #i keep thinking about the chat where we go 'no one is touching me' and he says 'no one is touching you yet' #like sir????? what do you mean??????? #i know the devs prolly read the fanfics for this since they see and share so much of the fanart so i hope they know they have us in a- #-chokehold for this man #cant wait for the beyond the bet dlc #a date with death x reader #casper x reader #casper x mc

[royalarchivist]

Phil: Doin' a lot of traveling around the New Years. Oh boy, oof. Oh golly, oh gee. But it should be worth it! It should be really good. I'm looking forward to it, Kristin's looking forward to it.

Random Chatter: What about Tallulah and Chayanne?

Phil: I told them already what's going on. I already told them. They already know when I'm getting back and all that stuff, so.

Random Chatter: The cookies though?

Phil: [Shrugs] So? I'm... physically not here? [Laughs] There's more things - there's more important things in life than feeding a virtual egg cookies, I'm sorry to say, dude. [Laughs]

Random Chatter: Get Tubbo to feed eggs cookies.

Phil: [Laughs and mimics the chatter in an annoying voice] "Get this person!" "Get that person!" ALSO IGNORING THOSE PEOPLE ALSO HAVE LIVES! Jesus Christ. That says a lot about what you think of your streamer. Oh my god, dude. Let them have a fcking week off man! Let the Eggs have a week off, you kidding me? They're people, too, they're admins!

Random Chatter: The eggs need to live.

Phil: They do! By having a week off! [Laughs] Leave them alone! Holy fck! Good lord... If I- if- Dude. If anyone in my chat is genuinely like gonna come into stream, and like - be pissed off that different members of QSMP are just not logging in, I'm banning you on the spot, 'cuz that is so fcking toxically online of you. That is SO chronically online of you. You need to take a break, and I'm giving you that break. I'm forcing you to take a break from your PC. Fckin' get up from the - look away from the screen.

#Philza #Phil #QSMP #For real though it's WILD that some people genuinely have that mentality #People forget that the ccs need breaks and so do the Eggs! #many of whom are in college #and hell even if they weren't #they still need a break! #Plus it's the holidays #Context for this conversation in case it wasn't clear: Phil was talking about leaving for the holidays and said others will be too #and some random chatters got annoying spamming about the Eggs and saying they'll die #I didn't catch this live but I'm watching the VOD #Idk. QSMP is almost a year old and people still get worried about the same stupid stuff #''The eggs are gonna die! No one will take care of this specific Egg unless I spam their name in chat 100000 times!'' #''Nobody cares about my fave and clearly I know better than actual members of the server'' #Like. c'mon man be serious #Everyone loves the Eggs #I feel like a lot of fans really do need to unplug and remember that it's not that serious #and this is coming from someone who bawled their eyes out at Bobby's death #real ass people's lives matter more. Let them take a break #Q's said so many times that they Eggs matter and he wouldn't just kill them all off for the hell of it #anyhoo #December 25 2023 #Q #Subtitles #Edited

[itstimeforstarwars]

Did I Make Up This Fic's Existence Or Did The Author Delete Or Did The Archive Go Down: a memoir of a long-time fic reader.

#chit chat #there's an interesting plot twist to this also when you're also a fic writer #sometimes you did make up the fic's existence because it was YOUR FUCKING FIC that you never finished and/or deleted #idk if i wrote this fic or if someone else did or if i just wished really hard about it after reading a similar fic #either way it doesn't seem to exist in 2024 #agony agony pain and death

[demonslayedher]

Here's a new idea for Hashira Training arc filler: what if they moved Iguro's backstory here???

I've always felt that the placement of his flashback arc was a disservice both to him and to the flow of the Sunrise Countdown arc. I had thought before that if I were to make editing decisions to make a theatrical conclusion to the series, for flow's sake the biggest change I would make would be to move the Iguro flashback to the Nakime fight to give that fight a little more weight, but even then, it does not quite fit.

But this is a short arc and Ufotable wants to sell us Hashira merch, and that means making us as invested in Hashira as possible! Since this is downtime and a chance to just let the characters communicate with each other, it is a good opportunity.

But who would Iguro bother communicating that too? We see in this arc that he and Mitsuri exchange letters, and although I would love such a shocker, I can't imagine he would tell Mitsuri all about his background. He doesn't seem to mind other people knowing since he canonically has chatted about it with Uzui, but still, why weigh her down with it?

There is the possibility of another character who knows about it broaching the topic, though. Like Shinjuro.

After all, aside from Iguro and Kaburamaru, Shinjuro has the best understanding of the situation he got out of, and he probably feels some responsibility for Iguro having joined the Corp at all. Shinjuro might even find it ironic that Iguro's training requires maneuvering through tight spaces. There might even be a question of why Iguro prefers that girls not take part in his training, if that winds up being the case (though I could just as easily see him being mature about it and dealing with it).

And the best/worst way for this to come up in the anime, via our vehicle whom we the audience experience most of this world through? Yeah, Shinjuro just dumps it all in a letter and concludes with "So anyway, say hi to him for me. Thx, Tanjiro."

#iguro WOULD NOT appreciate it and it WOULD NOT endear him #if they have a chance to grip later Sanemi will be like #'freaking Kamado tried to befriend me by chatting me up about OHAGI' #and Iguro would be like 'yeah he tried to befriend me by CHATTING ME UP ABOUT HOW MY EVIL FAMILY OF WOMEN MEANT TO FEED ME TO A SNAKE DEMON #AND I WAS THE DEATH OF THEM ALL #also it must be a Rengoju family gene to be VERY CHATTY' #iguro obanai

[dragonanon]

can you do a chapter based on your Death!Reader and God!Brother hcs where Death wakes up from her sleep and goes to Heaven to check up on her brother's children and everyone is obviously terrified of her?

Hmmm…I’m not typically one to do requests because the urge to write is so sporadic and random for me. BUT I have been thinking about the initial confrontation in Heaven for a while now, so here are some head cannons for that. >w>

——

- It’s a typical perfect day in Heaven…Until it isn’t. Having seen what had become of your realm and learning Heaven was to blame for it, you’re on your way to rip someone a new asshole.

- Screams erupt from the Angels as the ground begins to shake and the bright sky darkens. Sera and Emily rush out just in time to join the Angels in watching in abject terror as a massive pool of darkness forms on the ground, and from it slowly rises a menacing figure.

- The figure is massive, and it only continues to rise until even the tallest building barely reaches its hips. Its six long horns twist and arch toward the sky, only making the figure appear even taller. Upon reaching its full height, the figure spreads its six mighty wings, each one sporting a menacingly sharp claw and all as shrouded in darkness as the rest of the figure.

- As its wings blot out the sun further, the figure opens its many blazing white eyes; two where you’d normally expect to see eyes, a third in the center of its forehead, and dozens more scattered across its wings and body.

- Sera lost all color as soon as she saw the figure rising, and somehow lost even MORE color when the figure opened all of its eyes. She looks like she shit herself, and Emily is panicking, trying desperately to get Sera to tell her what’s going on; she’s never seen the older Seraph look so terrified.

- With this unimaginably imposing figure now looming over Heaven, Adam decides this is the PERFECT time to attack, having been dumb enough to think this was a Demon attacking Heaven.

- The exorcists fly up towards the figure, ready to attack. This only angers the figure further however, and with a rumble that shakes the ground itself, the figure merely flaps its wings; creating a gust of wind so powerful it knocks all the exorcists back onto the ground.

- It’s at this point Sera FINALLY snaps out of it, rushing to Adam in mad panic and damn nearly strangling him while telling him to call off the exorcists. Which he does, albeit with some reluctance.

- This doesn’t stop him from asking Sera what gives, and her response is “Adam you absolute fucking fool, that is DEATH!”

- Now it’s Adam’s turn to look like he shit himself. “Death? As in, “the big man himself’s younger sister” Death?? As in, “the baddest bitch you’ve EVER seen, but can kill ANYTHING by just touching it” Death??? THAT fucking Death????” Ignoring that last statement, Sera’s frantic nodding in confirmation confirms to Adam that he has indeed fucked up. Big time. Adam then proceeds to lose all color in his face and practically cowers behind Sera as she cautiously approaches you, mentally preparing herself to be reaped on the spot.

- Back to your perspective however, you’re fucking PISSED. So pissed that you don’t even notice or stop to think that most of Heaven’s inhabitants likely have NO CLUE who you are, and are likely legitimately fearing for their lives. Meanwhile for all the older Angels and Angelic beings who’ve been alive long enough to have known you before you went to sleep, like Sera, they’re all still very much afraid, but it’s more in line with the “oh shit mom’s home early and she saw the mess we made in the kitchen, she’s gonna kill us!” kind of fear.

- The fact that they sent exorcists at you makes you even angrier. Like for starters, how fucking weak do they think you are that you could be stopped by just some low level Angelic beings with pointy sticks?? And then the audacity to even attack you to begin with, like THEY weren’t the ones who fucked up and you’re just some kind of strange intruder needing to be slain?? The INDIGNITY of it all!

- Your voice booms throughout Heaven, making even the ground tremble at the sheer intensity of it. “WHO DID IT?” You’re met with only silence, so you ask again with more force. “MY REALM IS A COMPLETE MESS WITH MILLIONS OF DISPLACED SOULS RIGHT NOW. SO AGAIN I ASK, WHICH ONE OF YOU FLAT FOOT CHILDREN DID THIS?!”

- Sera replies, voice trembling slightly. “Are…Are you talking about the exterminations? “IF THAT IS WHAT YOU’RE CALLING THIS MOCKERY OF MY WORK, THEN YES.” Sera looks visibly confused and concerned. “But…That SHOULDN’T be possible!…The exterminations KILL the Sinners; their souls should be gone, not stuck in Limbo! There has to be some kind of mistake here!”

- Hearing this, you can’t help but let out a brief but harsh cackle, making the ground jolt from the abruptness. “DEAR YOU HONESTLY THINK A SOUL COULD BE SO EASY TO DESTROY? A SOUL IS A POWERFUL THING FOR A REASON CHILD, IF THEY WERE SO EASILY DESTROYED THEN NONE OF YOU WOULD BE STANDING HERE BEFORE ME NOW!…SO ONCE AGAIN, WHO. DID. THIS?! AND SO HELP ME, IF I HAVE TO ASK AGAIN THERE WILL BE CONSEQUENCES.”

- Whilst Sera is dumbfounded by this revelation, Adam sees a golden opportunity to save his ass and points at Sera. “I-It was her! Yeah it was all fucking HER idea! I-I tried to tell her it was stupid, b-but she just REALLY wanted to go down and kill those bast- Demons! Yeah she REALLY wanted to kill all those poor Demons, can ya fucking believe this shit?!”

- Before Sera can defend herself, the darkness seems to intensify, and she can just FEEL every one of your eyes glaring daggers into her. “SERA…YOU SIGNED OFF ON THIS?? YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF, I EXPECTED SO MUCH BETTER FROM YOU! I LEFT EXPLICIT INSTRUCTIONS FOR HEAVEN AND HELL TO WORK TOGETHER TO SORT SOULS FOR THIS VERY REASON! AND NOW BECAUSE OF THESE BARBARIC “EXTERMINATIONS”, YOU’VE COMPLETELY DESTROYED THE BALANCE I WORKED SO HARD TO CREATE AND MAINTAIN. I HOPE YOU’RE PROUD OF YOURSELF, BECAUSE I’M CERTAINLY NOT!”

- It’s a strange and mildly amusing sight to see the head seraph get scolded like a misbehaving child by this massive dark entity. But here we are anyway!

- At one point during the tongue lashing you’re giving to your niece, Emily buts in and asks for an explanation for what’s going on; having not heard Sera’s previous explanation to Adam apparently.

- Your temper flares for a brief moment, and you just about launched into another lecture at the little shit who DARED interrupt you. But upon seeing Emily, you softened considerably, seeing that she was young and TRULY didn’t understand what was happening.

- “AH…I APOLOGIZE DEAR, BUT I DON’T THINK I RECOGNIZE YOU…COME CLOSER LITTLE ONE SO I CAN SEE YOU.” You slowly crouch down and lower your hand, offering Emily to climb onto it. Emily is hesitant, obviously a bit scared of you. But Sera encourages her to go to you, she knows that you won’t hurt Emily and it’s high time she meets her aunt anyway.

- With the small seraph in hand, you stand back up to your full height and bring her closer to your face. Now FINALLY able to see her properly, you speak. “YOU’RE FAIRLY YOUNG FOR A SERAPH…YOU MUST’VE BEEN BORN DURING MY SLUMBER, AND IN THAT CASE I APOLOGIZE THIS HAD TO BE OUR FIRST MEETING. TELL ME, WHAT IS YOUR NAME CHILD?”

- Her voice trembling slightly, Emily tells you her name and then asks who you are and asks if you’re a seraph like her and Sera. The innocent question gets a genuine laugh out of you, and despite it shaking the ground it’s a lovely sound. “OH CHILD, I AM FAR FROM BEING A SERAPH. THOUGH I CAN SEE WHY YOU WOULD THINK THAT. YOU WERE ALL MADE IN MY IMAGE AFTER ALL.”

- Seeing the visible confusion on Emily’s face, you elaborated. “LONG AGO, YOUR FATHER WANTED TO SHOW HIS APPRECIATION OF ME. SO FOR HIS FIRST SENTIENT CREATIONS, THE SERAPHIM, HE BASED THEM ALL ON ME.” Emily looks surprised, and follows up by asking how you know God.

- You give another genuine laugh at her question. “SWEETY I’M HIS YOUNGER SISTER, I AM “DEATH”, THE GODDESS OF WELL…DEATH. BUT YOU CAN CALL ME “D” OR “AUNT D”, MOST OF YOUR SIBLINGS DO.” Emily’s mind is blown “Wait! YOU’RE aunt D?! Sera told me all kinds of stories about you before you went to sleep, like the time you got into an argument with Father over his invention of the “Snuggie”. I never thought I’d get to meet you!”

- “IT WAS LITERALLY JUST A BATHROBE YOU WORE BACKWARDS, AND I STILL CAN’T BELIEVE HE THOUGHT THAT WAS AT ALL CLEVER.” You huff, feeling amusement and mild irritation at that memory.

- “SPEAKING OF YOUR FATHER, WHERE IS HE?” Sera speaks up, having managed to recollect herself, and explains that no one has seen or heard a word from God since before you went to sleep.

- The irritated snarl that leaves your throat sounds like thunder and shakes the ground, making everyone tremble with fear. “THAT LAZY BASTARD HAD ONE FUCKING JOB, WATCH HIS DAMN KIDS, AND HE COULDN’T EVEN DO THAT?! NO WONDER THIS ALL HAPPENED THEN, HE LEFT YOU ALL UNSUPERVISED!”

- Bending over, you carefully set Emily down before standing back up. “I HATE TO CUT MY INTRODUCTION SHORT, BUT APPARENTLY I NEED TO GO AND HAVE A LITTLE CHAT WITH YOUR FATHER.” You stare pointedly at Sera and continue. “DON’T THINK THIS MEANS YOU’RE ENTIRELY OFF THE HOOK EITHER. WHILE YES, YOUR FATHER’S ABSENCE IS MOSTLY TO BLAME FOR THIS DEBACLE, YOU ALSO KNOW BETTER THAN TO DO SUCH TERRIBLE THINGS. WE WILL BE DISCUSSING THIS MORE ONCE I FINISH WITH YOUR FATHER, AND IF I COME BACK AND FIND OUT YOU HELD ANY MORE OF THESE “EXTERMINATIONS” I WILL TURN YOU INTO A HOLLOW! DO I MAKE MYSELF CLEAR?” Looking at the ground, Sera nods and says “Yes Auntie D…”

- Satisfied with that response, you bid everyone farewell and slowly melt back into the ground, completely disappearing. Once you’re gone, the sunlight is back and it’s as if you were never there.

- Now the seraphim have to soothe the murmuring crowd while Sera starts attempting to get in contact with Lucifer to let him know that “Hey Aunt D found out about the exterminations and is NOT happy about it. She just got done yelling at me, and now she’s on her way to go read Father the riot act. Just warning you now because once she’s done with him, you’re probably gonna be next.”

- Lucifer receives the message and is now frantically trying to create peace offerings in hopes they’ll make you more amicable, while also preemptively planning his own funeral in case the peace offerings don’t work.

- Meanwhile in God’s palace, God is currently relaxing in an elaborate hot tub and watching American football on an absurdly large TV whilst drinking wine like it’s water. He’s pretty drunk and having a grand time yelling at the TV.

- His fun is interrupted through by you literally kicking in the door and storming in, you’ve shrunken down to your smaller size so all your features are actually visible now and not covered in darkness as you glare at your older brother with an intensity that could peel paint.

- God startled momentarily before seeing it’s you and giving you a dopey smile. He’s also in his smaller form, so that makes things slightly easier for you. “Ohhh heeeyyy Death!…You startled me thereee…It’zzzz beeen awhillle, huh?” You scoff at his slurred speech, in disbelief that he could be so drunk right now.

- “Yes, it HAS been awhile. Good to see that you still choose to spend your days getting completely wasted instead of tending to your children.” You answer tersely, and God rolls his eyes. “Zzstill the saaame old ssstuck up bitch…Tha kidzz are fahine Deee! Yyyoou should cohme haave ah drink wib meee.”

- You ignore God’s offer for a drink and cut right to the chase. “No, your kids are NOT fine! When was the last time you checked in on them?! Do you even know what they’re up to right now??!” God dismissively waves his hand and chugs more wine. “I juzzt checked on thhhem ah couple decades aghooo..They’rrre prohably makinnn neeewh liffe.”

- “God that is a load of shit, and you know it! I was JUST down in Heaven, and the seraphim told me that you haven’t seen or spoken to ANY of them since I left to take my nap eons ago! And furthermore, while you’ve been in here drinking the day away, your children have COMPLETELY destroyed the balance we created! They’ve been mass slaughtering Demons annually for millennia now, and Limbo is a complete disaster right now because of this!” Hearing this, God looks down at his bottle of whine, embarrassed, and mumbles an awkward “oh”.

- Silence hangs heavy in the air for a moment before God clears his throat and says. “Zzsooo…You’rrree NNOT gooing to drink wiff me?” At this you snap and snatch the wine bottle from God and chuck it at the TV, smashing the bottle and the TV. God shouts in anger but before he can ask you wtf that was for, you just lay into him. Calling him a deadbeat and pathetic excuse of a deity.

- “How can you just sit in here day after day, while your CHILDREN are out there causing such mayhem! Do you not love your children all??!” God is shouting back at you, his anger having sobered him up some so he’s not slurring as much. “How DARE you accuse me of not loving my children! I would giive ANYTHING for them and you know that!”

- “Then fucking ACT like it!! Don’t just sit in here and rot your mind with booze and TV!” God growls. “I don’t need you to tell meee how to handle my children! Why do you even care?! It’zzz not like they’re yours anyway!”

- “I care because they are part of MY family, and I want my family to be safe and happy, something that you couldn’t give less of a shit about apparently!” God throws his hands up at this point “Well what do you want from me Death, go hhhold their handz?! My children are ALL capable of thinking and being on their own, they don’t NEED me to do shit for them!”

- “That doesn’t mean that they don’t still need you there emotionally! But with the way you act maybe it’s best you ARE never there! After all, what use could any of them get from your pathetic drunk ass!!” This clearly struck a nerve as God points back at the door you came in through and roars at you to get the fuck out of his house. Growling, you give a harsh “Fine!” and tell him he can sit and be a drunk deadbeat all he wants because you’re done with him and his shit, and he’s NEVER to contact you again unless it’s in regards to his children or business.

- You stomp out of God’s palace and return to Limbo, wanting to start working on getting things cleaned up and cool off some before you go check on things in Hell.

- Once you’re gone though, God slumps his shoulders and hangs his head. With your venomous words echoing his head, he summons another bottle of wine and begins chugging it while he trudges into his bedchambers.

- He flops down onto the bed and picks up a framed photo and slowly brings it closer to his face. It’s an old photo, one taken shortly after God created the first few seraphim. You and God are both standing next to each other, arms around each other’s shoulders and leaning in close while the first seraphim all stand in between the two of you. Everyone is absolutely beaming, and God looks especially happy; so proud of his creations.

- Tears drop onto the photo as God remembers how things used to be back then, back when he was actually NEEDED by those around him and wasn’t just some brand figure who’s only job is to smile and wave. Even as he slowly sets the photo down, tears continue to fall and he holds his head in his hands. “…I’m sorry I’m so damn useless…Hopefully you’ll forgive me someday…Not that I deserve it though…I’m…so fucking sorry…” No one is there to hear God’s sobs, and eventually he passes out. He’d rather be dreaming of happier times anyway.

#damn this ended up being WAY longer than i intended #and with a bit of angst no less! #god isn’t a bad guy he’s just SUPER depressed and suffering an existential crisis #basically after creating the angelic beings he didn’t really have to do anything anymore #because the angels were able to create and think on their own #so there isn’t really anything for god to do now because the angels can do it themselves #with so much time on his hands he started questioning his existence and what he was even meant to do #he feels completely useless because he truly believes that if he isn’t constantly creating things then he has no purpose #he deals with this by holing up in his palace and drinking himself silly and getting high #he has not told you this primarily because he doesn’t know how #he’s much like his son lucifer in that he’s not great at discussing his feelings #hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel x reader #hazbin hotel x death! reader #death reader #i like to imagine the seraphim have a group chat and sera just posts in it like ‘aunt d found out about the exorcisms. we’re all dead.’ #and it starts blowing up with everyone freaking out and trying to figure out wtf they’re gonna do #lucifer is preparing for the ass whooping you’re gonna give him

[lucienarcheron]

So I finished Fourth Wing…and I am deeply upset about a particular thing that happens in the end that I don’t think I’ll recover from.

#fourth wing #it pertains to a certain death which I will not name for spoilers #but HOW DARE RY HOW DARE SHEEEEEE #I AM SO MAD #this is going to be my hater series lmao #I don’t care about anyone else #except my bby who died #literally said in the group chat if anything happens to [ redacted ] I will k everyone in this room and then myself #AND THEY LET ME CONTINUE TO BE ATTACHED #betrayal at its finest #gp #gigi reads #I see your asks bby!!! I will get to inbox later <3

[anna-scribbles]

do you think émilie agreste knew, on the day she became too weak to leave that house, that she never would again

#having a normal one. don’t worry about it #just thinking about how she never escaped even in death etc etc #do you think she knew even as she pleaded with gabriel to give up on her that he never would. #that no one truly loved her enough to heed her warnings #that adrien was going to be left alone #what must it have been like for her to grow slower and weaker and quieter until she was as still as the bed d #do you think she knew she was becoming another fixture of that house #beautiful and immovable and silent #how long did gabriel have that coffin ready in the basement. how much time did he spend building it. did nathalie help. #did emilie know where they went in those long hours she laid there dying? that they intended to keep her there -always dying and never dead? #is that why she left videos? because she knew they’d build an altar for her haunting and she had to give her ghost a voice? #i think often about gabriel saying that emilie never wanted what she deserved #i think about gabriel and nathalie not letting her die. i think about ladybug not letting chat noir die. #circles and cycles ending up right back where you started #you know. having a normal one #anna rambles #emilie agreste #thirteen

[lady-harrowhark]

one of the things that really breaks my heart is the way that Kiriona immediately cracks a joke about stealing Palamedes’s girl when she sees him again. we saw how awful she felt about that - she was literally on her way to apologize when he went supernova. but give up humor as a defense mechanism? not even over her mega-dead body.

baby girl’s been stewing in that guilt for a long time.

#if only they had time for another heart-to-no-heart chat about why she's not responsible for various people's deaths and misfortunes #alas #nona the ninth spoilers #kiriona gaia #palamedes sextus #gideon nav #nona the ninth #the locked tomb #tlt #my tlt thoughts

[varilien]

(character uses they/it) i keep wanting to start posting my ocs over here again and then Just Not Doing It so uhhhh !!! some stuff from february, had a dream about knives that made me think of a plant oc with a constant power output so extreme that it generates a deadly radiation field around them. because of that they've been living alone this whole time, avoiding contact with other living things, and over the years they've learned how to suppress that output for short spans of time or "safely" pour out the excess in order to be safe to be around, though they ultimately prefer their solitude due to a history of bad experiences with humans. they're very blunt, spiteful, and curious

@whatever-you-can-give-me suggested lr would make good friends for them since they are 🤝 about being extremely hard to hurt lol

also! wrote like 2k about they and razlo's first meeting below the cut if anyone's interested in some good ol violence + gore :3

that was a fr content warning btw read at ur own discretion:

Chance encounters with violent strangers out in the open desert are nothing new to LR, even when Livio purposefully had tried to find the quietest possible route to travel.  It’s not even necessarily surprising to run into someone a little to the left of human, someone a bit bigger or stronger or more durable than they really have any right to be.  The Eye aren’t the only ones designing freaks on this planet, that much is obvious, evidenced sufficiently by the odder fights LR have ever gotten in.  

And this one is shaping up to be one of their oddest fights yet.

Livio hadn’t seen the fucker coming, occupied as he was with the slow realization of why this stretch of road doesn’t see much use anymore: a creeping heat across his nerve endings unrelated to the overcast, evening suns, the taste of metal in his mouth, and a deep-rooted nausea twisting up his guts.  Radiation sickness.  He’s dealt with it before, and as unpleasant as it is, it’s hardly enough to slow him down too bad.  

It’s damn distracting, though.  A good enough excuse for not noticing them hiding up along the rockface above his head.  Not a good enough excuse to keep Razlo from tagging in, especially after something’s pierced straight through the back of his neck, nearly taking his head clean off.  

Razlo rolls for cover with a strangled sound, blood gushing from his forced-out throat and foaming at his lips.  Even with his senses jarred and his vision blurred, it'd take more than a near-decapitation for his instincts to be overridden.  He's slinging out a Punisher before he even knows what he's up against.  

There's a blur of motion to his right as soon as his sights are raised.  They're probably surprised Razlo's still standing, but so was everyone else who's gotten a lucky shot at him.

He can track their motion by sound alone.  They're sloppy.  Feet hitting the cracked earth in hard thumps, every one a warning that Razlo can aim a spray of bullets at.  And by now Razlo's healed enough to notice and wonder why the hell his head is still so fucked up.

At least now he can mostly see them when he turns, hanging back a ways, out of Razlo's reach.  Shorter than him by a head and a half, covered toe to tip in layers of sun-bleached rags, save for their face.  That's hidden behind a tall, curved mask, shaped in a way that looks an awful lot like a tomas' crest, with the false eye markings to match.  Even the glass for the lenses is opaque.  The only part of them that’s exposed is their left hand, extended delicately aside to keep Razlo’s blood dripping off it from getting on their clothes.

Razlo physically tries to shake out the buzzing in his skull that only gets worse by the second, only to notice the foul smell of burning meat and risk an instinctive glance down at his arm, where his flesh has started to bubble and steam seemingly on its own.  He looks between his arm and his opponent, the way their body tenses and head begins to tip, shaking hard, simultaneous with his skin boiling that much more fiercely.  

Something clicks in his brain.  There’s no way.

And no time to find out.  This time when they dart in he’s expecting it; he takes a swing at their head, and they dodge right into his follow-through, slamming his Punisher into their skull with a crunch and a wet sound from their throat.  They drop, like he’d expect them to, like anyone would.  And like no one does, they just roll out of the way and onto their back, braced to spring back up again.  Razlo puts his boot through their ribcage before they get the chance to.  That should be the end of it, too, but the fucker just keeps kicking, trying to get away, the only sound they make being the gurgle of their lungs filling with blood, and they keep kicking.

At this point Razlo doesn’t even have a plan anymore.  Needless to say, he doesn’t go up against an awful lot of guys who match him in the department of being a pain in the ass to take down.  Razlo's just starting to come up with a new idea when those long arms swing up, claws digging into and making ribbons of his right leg.

Razlo curses and tries to pull away, which only makes them hold on even tighter.  He's staring that four-eyed glare down when that burning feeling across his whole body raises in pitch again, and it's the sight of his flesh starting to disintegrate around their fingers that finally makes him back off.

Razlo rather gracelessly falls on his ass in trying to take a step back, not expecting his right leg to simply break off halfway down his thigh.  He scrambles back a ways, ready to keep going, missing limb or no, but— they aren't following him.  They're collapsed in the sand, limbs akimbo as they fight to draw a full breath.  Razlo watches with morbid curiosity as his severed leg dissolves into nothing more than an off-colored patch of sand beside them.

All that angry tension has gone out of their body, leaving them limp and motionless except for the stutter of their chest, and Razlo can hear the damp gasps muffled behind their mask.  By all rights, it should look like more of a struggle.  They should be dead, really, but from where Razlo is sitting, it looks a lot more like they’re just taking a rest.  He feels more sure of that when they roll their shoulders back a bit, arms braced in the dirt as they delicately arch their spine.  There’s some sharp popping sounds, and a little exhale from them; setting their ribs, Razlo figures.  He’s had to do the same thing before.  Once they can move their arms more effectively, they start to gather themself up into a seated position, bones and joints still crackling like popcorn here and there as they go, til they’re all the way up, with their hands resting in their lap, looking far too fucking comfortable for the fight they’d just had.

"You're not dead."

Their voice startles Razlo despite being as soft as it is, and his gaze flicks up to that mask, just slightly tilted to the side, orange lenses glinting in the harsh sunlight.  They don't move at all that Razlo can see.  Even their breathing has evened out enough to have become imperceptible under their heavy shroud; if they're in any pain still, Razlo sure can't tell.

"Nope," is all he says, or can manage to say.

He scrubs at his eyes with the back of his hand, blinking hard a couple times to scrunch up his face in the hopes his nerves might start feeling right again soon.

Another wave of nausea hits him, but his stomach was empty before the fight even started, so he leans forward to put his head between his knees and dry heave for a while.

The whole time, he's aware of his little opponent continuing to sit in silence, watching and eerily unmoving, even when Razlo manages to sit up again and wipe his mouth with his wrist.

"The fuck's yer deal, anyways?"  Razlo asks.

"'Deal'...?"  They echo.

"Couldn't exactly kill you, either."

He wasn't expecting them to spill their life story or something, but he was thinking he'd get something more of a response than their head tilting back the opposite way.  There's not a lot to work with here in trying to get a read on them, but Razlo feels it's safe to hazard they're probably just pretty damn confused, the same as him.

"You kinda smell like a Plant.  M'not an expert, but I've met two others."

Now that gets something out of them.  A tiny wiggle of their head that makes the pieces in their mask rattle.

"I wouldn't know.  I've only met me."

“Huh.”  

Whether it’s a confirmation or rebuttal hardly matters at this point.  He’s feeling sure enough that his assumption was correct, now, anyways.

"You, uh…"  Razlo has to pause for breath.  Unlike the thing across from him, he's having a hell of a time getting his back.  "You're the one making this radiation field?"

"Yes."

"Any way you could turn it down?"

They say nothing, though Razlo feels suddenly that he's being studied very intently.  And shortly after, slowly, slowly the fire in his cells begins to go out, and he can spit the worst of the sourness off his tongue.  Eventually he can't feel any radiation left at all, though his body's had a rough enough time from the dose he got, he'll be getting the sickness out of his system for a while yet.

Regardless, Razlo’s fingers twitch against the triggers when he hears that mask rattle again, and his eyes are on it in an instant.

"You didn't answer my first question," Razlo reminds, cautiously.

More silence, for a while.

"You wanted to hurt me."

There's no malice in the statement, at least that Razlo can tell.  Just the simple facts.  Still, he narrows his eyes.

"You started it.  Figured it was mutual."

"That's true."

Razlo grins.

"So, what now?  Regrow my leg, and get back to not killing each other?"

"If you'd like to."

That gets a laugh out of him.

"Nah, I think I’ll pass, if it’s all the same to you.”

“It is.”

That much is obvious.  They stay put, seeming transfixed on watching Razlo’s leg grow back, only a little more slowly than any of his other injuries, now that he doesn’t have the radiation to slow him down.  It leaves him feeling itchy and achy all over, and he’s got a bad hunch that right ankle doesn’t have the best chances of coming back right.  Once there’s enough of it to fuss about, he gets his foot in his hands and starts experimentally rolling it on its hinge, checking that the range of motion is right.

And still, those orange lenses glint at him curiously.  They don’t flinch or look away when Razlo considers them in return; he guesses they don’t know it’s not polite to stare.

“What's yer name?"  Razlo asks.

"My name?"

"Don't tell me you ain't got one."

The silence that follows is pretty self-explanatory.

“I’m Razlo.”

He can just make out the sound of them mumbling his name under their breath, like they’re not sure how it’s going to come out.  Almost warmly, almost shyly, they manage to say: “hello, Razlo.”

#also you don't have to tell me their mask reminds you of tristamp zazie's everyone says that lmao #oc #oc: razlo's lil friend #razlo #razlo the tri punisher of death #livio #livio the double fang #cuz i've never read trimax chatting about lr n their lil friend just felt like the usual playing toys time of oc crossovers w friends lol #and for that reason i have not given any thought at all to them meeting any other characters jghkdjf #i figure i should probably post this now since i'm gonna be busy with the horror movie requests + halloween stuff for a while

[princelancey]

Lance is such a let bygones be bygones kind of a guy, we should embrace that energy more often in sports tbh, it's never that serious

#lance stroll #before gets on my back this is about sporting issues #just sporting issues #of course serious issues warrant grudges and distrust #idk man i think i'm just feeling like people are taking this all too seriously #the amount of death wishes made towards drivers in the time i've been watching f1 has ramped up so much #it's not normal to feel that way about a sports person #genuinely seek help #and over the most ridiculous mundane shit that happens every race or worse over people thinking rules have been broken that haven't actuall #anyways this was spured by watching lance's post sprint interview #he was asked about nico pushing him off and he was just like 'that happened? oh yeah i forgot about that nah it was chill' #like that's such a peaceful way to go about it #let what happens in a race stay in that race or in a match #this is easier when your memory sucks lmao #i'm just so tired of the massive fan wars the time and energy it takes isn't worth it #like not online anyways chat shit in dms but again if you're still chatting shit about a race from 4 years ago move on i beg

[celluloidbroomcloset]

(This leads on from these two posts, in order: here and here )

To go back briefly to Stede's masculine presentation - his outward performance of queerness mirrors his inward experience (I'd argue that in Season 1 he's not aware of this, but that's another post). From what we see of his childhood and his treatment by the Badmintons, his difference has been a source of torment, both at the hands of others and of himself. He's not "manly" enough, and he's internalized that feeling without fully comprehending why. This could easily get warped into toxicity, with him attempting to prove that he is manly enough by forcing himself into the "real man" role insisted on by his father and the Badmintons. And maybe he has done that, at some point, and been ridiculed for it, much as he's initially ridiculed about his attempts at piracy. Regardless, when we meet him we meet a closeted gay man, so repressed he's likely unaware of his own repression, who is also both unwilling and incapable of suppressing at least his outward expression.

Stede's queerness almost immediately affects those around him. He embraces and encourages emotional expression in others, perhaps in part as a result of being told that his own emotional expression was unacceptable. His care for his crew manifests in encouraging them to be creative - he brings them together with the flag making competition, and throughout the show he treats them with kindness and support, in all their idiosyncrasies. He encourages them to talk about their feelings and what they want to do, and gives them space to do it in. As a result, they feel safe enough to express themselves in increasingly open ways - as Jim removes their beard and nose, Wee John begins to knit, Lucius draws his crewmates naked, etc.

Stede not only doesn't insist on his crew performing categorical gender or sexual roles, he doesn't seem to even think of those roles as relevant beyond the individual. It doesn't matter that Buttons is in love with the sea; he's a good first mate, and his love is a part of who he is. It doesn't matter whether Jim is male, female, or nonbinary; they are a total badass, and a valued member of the crew, and their gender identification is a part of that. A man whose self-presentation has been ridiculed and derided his entire life doesn't even think about deriding others. It doesn't occur to him as a thing he could or should do.

It's very important that this is not about Stede being oblivious to gender or sexuality (or race or class), but quite simply not considering hierarchies and power structures something he needs to police or enforce. He creates a safe space for his crew, and he's aware and defensive of it when that space is violated - by the English, by Izzy, and by Calico Jack. The result is a crew who love him deeply - who shock Chauncey by their loyalty - and who miss him when he's gone. They want to protect him; the one time Lucius lashes out at Ed in Season 1, it's because he sees how hard Stede is trying and is furious that Ed is being a dick about it. Stede is flawed and complicated, and as Lucius says, a bizarre little man, but he's loved in part because even his flaws come from a place of emotional vulnerability and openness.

This is extraordinarily important for what happens in Season 2 with Izzy. Following the events on the Revenge and the "murder" of Ed, Izzy is completely unmoored. He's lost his leg, but he's also lost his identity, at one point staring at himself in the mirror and asking what he even is. He staggers around the ship drunk, shouting at the headless unicorn, swearing at the crew, his leg literally breaking under the weight of his anger. He does not expect sympathy or love; he even wants Stede to lash out at him when Stede discovers Ed's death. He's lost all power. If Blackbeard no longer exists, what does that make Izzy?

Izzy has existed within a masculine hierarchy in which his power is dependent on his maintaining his place within it. He is Blackbeard's first mate, he knows his job, and he will do it even if Ed doesn't want him to. Stede threatens that position by his fluidity and his soft masculinity, and not playing by the rules that Izzy has been governed by (likely his entire life). Izzy initially wants to control Stede's emotions too - he tells him not to cry, then asks him to "do your worst." But Stede still declines to play the game - he's not going to burst into tears. He's not going to fly into a rage. He won't fill the role Izzy wants him to. Now Izzy has "lost" according to his own rules - he's been rendered impotent and nameless, without even Stede's anger to push back against.

But Izzy is not therefore abandoned, and Stede's ethos has so permeated the crew that they set aside their own trauma to help someone in greater need. Their project of making Izzy's new leg takes an object that he had expressed identification with - the unicorn - and applies their collective love and creativity to refashioning it for him, as a support. It's a near repeat of the first episode's flag making competition, though this time Stede himself is physically absent as a driving force.

The crew's collective effort isn't an imposition of love, but an offering of it - it's up to Izzy whether to accept it or to continue to descend into the horrors of his "broken" masculinity. Izzy first identifies himself with the broken unicorn (an "impossible" animal that has historical and cultural resonance for the LGBTQ+ community) and then accepts the crew's offer and voluntarily makes it a part of himself. It is an acceptance not just of the love of the crew, but an integration of queerness - the ethos that he tried so hard to belittle and reject as "unmasculine" - into his masculine presentation. No one else sees his brokenness as shameful, and he takes the first steps into breaking free of the shame he and the broader hierarchy of masculinity has imposed on him. This may be the first time that we see Izzy give a genuine smile and cry tears not associated with pain.

Izzy doesn't suddenly stop being the person he is. He still swears, he still insults the crew (with a loving "cocksuckers"), he still mocks Stede, he still wears leather and prides himself on his physical skills. But he begins to open up, to step outside the hierarchy he has so intensely and painfully tried to adhere to, to break the rules that toxic masculinity has imposed on him.

(I'll go into the final point of the arc and Izzy's acceptance of Ed and Stede's relationship later.)

#ofmd season 2 #ofmd #our flag means death #gif #ofmd season one #stede bonnet #izzy hands #toxic masculinity #ofmd crew #ofmd meta #i'm always happy to chat about this as well #i do actually have a job that i should probably be doing...

[sunlit-haruka]

Something about Whit’s character that I don’t see a lot of people talking about is how often he is willing to hide things or even just straight up lie in order to protect people. In the CH1-9, he lies about being friends with Charles in order to prove his innocence, and mind you not only has Whit not known Charles for more then about three or four days with the only interactions between them being Whit teasing him, but Whit outright admits in CH2-2 that he used to be the most judgemental of him

Now obviously Whit and Charles became friends after the trial, but the point here is that in Chapter 1, Charles is not someone that Whit particularly knew, and yet Whit still chose to lie despite the small chance that Charles was actually the culprit. But the instance I really want to talk about is in CH2-11 when Whit hides David’s secret from the rest of the cast. This isn’t an Eden situation where she was threatened into keeping quiet, Whit chose to keep quiet about David’s secret despite it being a massive piece of evidence and potentially risking everyone’s lives in the process. David was also someone that Whit lacked any real relationship with, I think the only time the two interacted was in the kitchen in CH2-7 and that was very brief

Whit mentions after David goes into his emo phase that the reason he hid the secret was to protect David’s career, but honestly it feels strange that that would even be a concern in his mind in a situation like this, especially when like I said he barely knew or had any interactions with David. There is another reason for this behavior. Now, in CH2-3, Charles does say something that could give a lead

Whit is a very empathetic person, and probably puts himself in other people’s shoes when it comes to situations like this. As such, he is not the kind of person to sacrifice someone else’s privacy willy-nilly as he can imagine how that would affect someone. This also lines up quite well with his talent, I must add. As the Ultimate Matchmaker, part of his talent probably has to do with keeping people’s secrets, and this lines up with how DRDTDev describes his talent too

However, I do think there is another reason for this I feel like Whit and Hu share a similar mindset of wanting to assume the best in others. Hu is obviously more direct with it, but I think Whit also has this mindset to a smaller degree. You could argue that this is also due to his intuition, and I’d say it is partially that, but with the whole David situation I don’t think that’s all there is to it as every other example of his intuition has turned out to be right. Whit hiding things and lying for others probably comes from a place of wanting to believe the best in them. I don’t think Whit would really care about protecting David’s career if he thought he was a scumbaggy manipulator, nor would he lie about being Charles’ friend to cover for him if he thought he was the culprit. He chose to do those things in an attempt to see the best in them.

#haru chats about drdt #If I am right about all of this I wonder how he and David will interact in Chapter 3 #As David mocked Hu for how she went about things and Whit has a similar mindset #Especially considering Whit is the only one who really hasn't snapped (externally) from the death game yet #GODDD I WANT TO SEE AN INTERACTION BETWEEN THEM SO BADDD #Chapter 3 is going to be Whit's chapter I'm telling you #I'm also thinking pretty hard about how this all ties into his everything is fine mindset about the death game #I'm going to make a full analysis on Whit eventually I just needed to let my thoughts out #Also I hope the way I refer to the episodes didn't confuse anyone #Danganronpa Despair Time #drdt #Whit Young #drdt whit