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dougielombax · 8 months

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*visibly, violently drunk AND hung over to boot*

*furiously operates ship’s steering wheel from the helm*

*the ship in question being a MASSIVE, heavily reinforced bulk carrier vessel used to carry goods and chemicals*

*sounds the ship’s horn*

“YO HO HO AND A BOTTLE OF ZIMAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!” *whips the shit out of a nearby sextant*

*crashes into a buoy*

“AAAAAAAAGH!!!!!!!! THE SEAGULLS ARE EVERYWHERE!!!! BITING MY FACE!!!!!!”

*obliterates a small fishing boat*

“I GOT FUCKIN’ SCURVY!!!!!” *pukes violently*

*rams into a nearby group of rocks by the pier*

“YEEEEES!!!!! I’M THE KING OF THE WORLD!!!!!!!” *pukes violently again*

*furious pounding on the locked door to the bridge as the crew demands to be given back control of the ship*

“SHIT UP YER TRAP YE SCURVY BASTARDS!!!!! I AIN’T DONE YET!!!!” *furiously bites down on ship’s wheel*

*bell ringing*

“AAAAH!!!! THERE’S A SIGHT FOR SORE ARSES!” *swigs half a bottle of cocktail mixture*

“ALRIGHT! HUSH UP, FUCKERS! I’M ABOUT TO CRANK THIS BABY INTO MAXIMUM OVERDRIVE!!!!”

*ship begins to rapidly pick up speed*

“What’s happening?!”

“YEEEEAH!!!!! LETS SEE HOW THE CAPTAIN DOES IT!!!!!!!” *pukes violently again*

*the ship moves within sight of a nearby emergency towing vessel from the local port*

“AHAAAA!!!! THERE YE ARE YE BASTARDS!!!!!”

*cut to the crew of the towing vessel*

“Uh sir, that cargo ship is heading right for us.”

“Can we hail them?”

“No sir. We tried and got nothing but garbled noise and gibberish. We’ve called the coast guard and they’re sending a boarding team but we’re gonna need to move quickly.”

“Oh shit! You’re right! Quick, reverse engines. Full power!”

*cut back to tanker where the drunken captain is having a power trip*

*helicopter flies overhead*

*farts* “HARD STARBOOOOOAAARD!!!!!!”

*pushes accelerator forward*

*crashes violently into emergency towing vessel at full speed, cracking the damn thing in half! the crew locked out of the bridge are screaming and panicking.*

*a coast guard tugboat rushes to the scene to rescue survivors from the destroyed towing vessel*

“YEEEEEAAAAH!!!!! I’M JACK SPARROW, BITCH!!!!!!!!!!”

*pukes violently*

*coast guard boarding team begins pounding on the door to the bridge*

“GIT TAE FECK!!!!!! I AIN’T DONE HERE YET!!!!!! OOOOOOOH SUSANNNA, OH DON’T YOU CRY FOR MEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!” *farts* *coughs* *pukes violently* *kicks the shit out of a nearby plant pot*

*coast guard boarding team suddenly breaks down the door to the bridge and tackles the shit out of the drunken captain*

“OOF!!!!!! MUTINYYYYYYY!!!!!!” *pukes violently while being handcuffed*

*abruptly cut to black*

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lezarkyeahyeah · 6 months

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Whitsundays, Great Barrier Reef 2023

#australia #whitsundays #islands #coral reef #great barrier reef #sea #pirates of the carribean #pacific ocean #east coast #photography

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nellasbookplanet · 2 months

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Book recs: black science fiction

As february and black history month nears its end, if you're a reader let's not forget to read and appreciate books by black authors the rest of the year as well! If you're a sci-fi fan like me, perhaps this list can help find some good books to sink your teeth into.

Bleak dystopias, high tech space adventures, alien monsters, alternate dimensions, mash-ups of sci-fi and fantasy - this list features a little bit of everything for genre fiction fans!

For more details on the books, continue under the readmore. Titles marked with * are my personal favorites. And as always, feel free to share your own recs in the notes!

If you want more book recs, check out my masterpost of rec lists!

Lagoon by Nnedi Okorafor

Something massive and alien crashes into the ocean off the coast of Nigeria. Three people, a marine biologist, a rapper, and a soldier, find themselves at the center of this presence, attempting to shepherd an alien ambassador as chaos spreads in the city. A strange novel that mixes the supernatural with the alien, shifts between many different POVs, and gives a one of a kind look at a possible first contact.

Nubia: The Awakening (Nubia series) by Omar Epps & Clarence A. Hayes

Young adult. Three teens living in the slums of an enviromentally ravaged New York find that something powerful is awakening within them. They’re all children of refugees of Nubia, a utopian African island nation that sank as the climate worsened, and realize now that their parents have been hiding aspects of their heritage from them. But as they come into their own, someone seeks to use their abilities to his own ends, against their own people.

The Scourge Between Stars by Ness Brown

Novella. After having failed at establishing a new colony, starship Calypso fights to make it back to Earth. Acting captain Jacklyn Albright is already struggling against the threats of interstellar space and impending starvation when the ship throws her a new danger: something is hiding on the ship, picking off her crew one by one in bloody, gruesome ways. A quick, excellent read if you want some good Alien vibes.

Dawn (Xenogenesis trilogy) by Octavia E. Butler*

After a devestating war leaves humanity on the brink of extinction, survivor Lilith finds herself waking up naked and alone in a strange room. She’s been rescued by the Oankali, who have arrived just in time to save the human race. But there’s a price to survival, and it might be humanity itself. Absolutely fucked up I love it I once had to drop the book mid read to stare at the ceiling and exclaim in horror at what was going on. Includes darker examinations of agency and consent, so enter with caution.

Midnight Robber by Nalo Hopkinson*

Utterly unique in world-building, story, and prose, Midnight Robber follows young Tan-Tan and her father, inhabitants of the Carribean-colonized planet of Toussaint. When her father commits a terrible crime, he’s exiled to a parallel version of the same planet, home to strange aliens and other human exiles. Tan-Tan, not wanting to lose her father, follows with him. Trapped on this new planet, he becomes her worst nightmare. Enter this book with caution, as it contains graphic child sexual abuse.

Rosewater (The Wormwood trilogy) by Tade Thompson

In Nigeria lies Rosewater, a city bordering on a strange, alien biodome. Its motives are unknown, but it’s having an undeniable effect on the surrounding life. Kaaro, former criminal and current psychic agent for the government, is one of the people changed by it. When other psychics like him begin getting killed, Kaaro must take it upon himself to find out the truth about the biodome and its intentions.

Do You Dream of Terra-Two? by Temi Oh

Young adult. A century ago, an astronomer discovered a possibly Earth-like planet. Now, a team of veteran astronauts and carefully chosen teenagers are preparing to embark on a twenty-three year trip to get there. But space is dangerous, and the team has no one to rely on but each other if - or when - something goes wrong. An introspective slowburn of a story, this focuses more on character work than action.

The Best of All Possible Worlds by Karen Lord

After the planet Sadira is left uninhabitable, its few survivors are forced to move to a new world. On Cygnus Beta, they work to rebuild their society alongside their distant relatives of the planet, while trying to preserve what remains of their culture. Focused less on hard science or action, The Best of All Possible Worlds is more about culture, romance and the ethics and practicalities of telepathy.

Mirage (Mirage duology) by Somaiya Daud

Young adult. Eighteen-year-old Amani lives on an isolated moon under the oppressive occupation of the Valthek empire. When Amani is abducted, she finds herself someplace wholly unexpected: the royal palace. As it turns out, she's nearly identical to the half-Valthek, and widely hated, princess Maram, who is in need of a body double. If Amani ever wants to make it back home or see her people freed from oppression, she will have to play her role as princess perfectly. While sci-fi, this one more has the vibe of a fantasy.

An Unkindness of Ghosts by Rivers Solomon

Life on the lower decks of the generation ship HSS Matilda is hard for Aster, an outcast even among outcasts, trying to survive in a system not dissimilar to the old antebellum South. The ship’s leaders have imposed harsh restrictions on their darker skinned people, using them as an oppressed work force as they travel toward their supposed Promised Land. But as Aster finds a link between the death of the ship’s sovereign and the suicide of her own mother, she realizes there may be a way off the ship.

Where It Rains in Color by Denise Crittendon

The planet Swazembi is a utopia of color and beauty, the most beautiful of all its citizens being the Rare Indigo. Lileala was just named Rare Indigo, but her strict yet pampered life gets upended when her beautiful skin is struck by a mysterious sickness, leaving it covered in scars and scabs. Meanwhile, voices start to whisper in Lileala's mind, bringing to the surface a past long forgotten involving her entire society.

Eacaping Exodus (Escaping Exodus duology) by Nicky Drayden

Seske is the heir to the leader of a clan living inside a gigantic, spacefaring beast, of which they frequently need to catch a new one to reside in as their presence slowly kills the beast from the inside. While I found the ending rushed with regards to plot and character, the worldbuilding is very fresh and the overall plot of survival and class struggle an interesting one. It’s also sapphic!

Chain-Gang All-Stars by Nana Kwame Adjei-Brenyah*

In a near future America, inmates on death row or with life sentences in private prisons can choose to participate in death matches for entertainment. If they survive long enough - a rare case indeed - they regain their freedom. Among these prisoners are Loretta Thurwar and Hamara "Hurricane Staxxx" Stacker, partners behind the scenes and close to the deadline of a possible release - if only they can survive for long enough. As the game continues to be stacked against them and protests mount outside, two women fight for love, freedom, and their own humanity. Chain-Gang All-Stars is bleak and unflinching as well as genuinely hopeful in its portrayal of a dark but all to real possible future.

Parable of the Sower (Earthseed duology) by Octavia E. Butler*

In a bleak future, Lauren Olamina lives with her family in a gated community, one of few still safe places in a time of chaos. When her community falls, Lauren is forced on the run. As she makes her way toward possible safety, she picks up a following of other refugees, and sows the seeds of a new ideology which may one day be the saviour of mankind. Very bleak and scarily realistic, Parable of the Sower will make you both fear for mankind and regain your hope for humanity.

Binti (Binti trilogy) by Nnedi Okorafor

Young adult novella. Binti is the first of the Himba people to be accepted into the prestigious Oomza University, the finest place of higher learning in all the galaxy. But as she embarks on her interstellar journey, the unthinkable happens: her ship is attacked by the terrifying Meduse, an alien race at war with Oomza University.

War Girls (War Girls duology) by Tochi Onyebuchi

In an enviromentally fraught future, the Nigerian civil war has flared back up, utilizing cybernetics and mechs to enhance its soldiers. Two sisters, by bond if not by blood, are separated and end up on differing sides of the struggle. Brutal and dark, with themes of dehumanization of soldiers through cybernetics that turn them into weapons, and the effect and trauma this has on them.

The Space Between Worlds (The Space Between Worlds duology) by Micaiah Johnson

Multiverse travel is finally possible, but there’s a catch: No one can visit a world where their counterpart is still alive. Enter Cara, whose parallel selves happen to be exceptionally good at dying. As such she has a very special job in traveling to these worlds, hoping to keep her position long enough to gain citizenship in the walled-off Wiley City, away from the wastes where she grew up. But her job is dangerous, especially when she gets on the tracks of a secret that threatens the entire multiverse. Really cool worldbuilding and characters, also featuring a sapphic lead!

The Fifth Season (The Broken Eart trilogy) by N.K. Jemisin*

In a world regularly torn apart by natural disasters, a big one finally strikes and society as we know it falls, leaving people floundering to survive in a post apocalyptic world, its secrets and past to be slowly revealed. We get to follow a mother as she races through this world to find and save her missing daughter. While mostly fantasy in genre, this series does have some sci-fi flavor, and is genuinely some of the best books I've ever read, please read them.

The Women Could Fly by Megan Giddings*

In an alternate version of our present, the witch hunt never ended. Women are constantly watched and expected to marry young so their husbands can keep an eye on them. When she was fourteen, Josephine's mother disappeared, leveling suspicions at both mother and daughter of possible witchcraft. Now, nearly a decade and a half later, Jo, in trying to finally accept her missing mother as dead, decides to follow up on a set of seemingly nonsensical instructions left in her will. Features a bisexual lead!

The Prey of Gods by Nicky Drayden

South African-set scifi featuring gods ancient and new, robots finding sentience, dik-diks, and a gay teen with mind control abilities. An ancient goddess seeks to return to her true power no matter how many humans she has to sacrifice to get there. A little bit all over the place but very creative and fresh.

The Summer Prince by Alaya Dawn Johnson*

Young adult. Young artist June Costa lives in Palmares Tres, a beautiful, matriarchal city relying heavily on tradition, one of which is the Summer King. The most recent Summer King is Enki, a bold boy and fellow artist. With him at her side, June seeks to finally find fame and recognition through her art, breaking through the generational divide of her home. But growing close to Enki is dangerous, because he, like all Summer Kings, is destined to die.

The Blood Trials (The Blood Gifted duology) by N.E. Davenport

After Ikenna's grandfather is assasinated, she is convinced that only a member of the Praetorian guard, elite soldiers, could’ve killed him. Seeking to uncover his killer, Ikenna enrolls in a dangerous trial to join the Praetorians which only a quarter of applicants survive. For Ikenna, the stakes are even higher, as she's hiding forbidden blood magic which could cost her her life. Mix of fantasy and sci-fi. While I didn’t super vibe with this one, I suspect fans of action packed romantasy will enjoy it.

Babel-17 by Samuel R. Delany

1960s classic. Rydra Wong is a space captain, linguist and poet who is set on learning to understand Babel-17, a language which is humanity's only clue at the enemy in an interstaller war. But Babel-17 is more than just a language, and studying it may change Rydra forever.

Pet (Pet duology) by Akwaeke Emezi

Young adult novella. Jam lives in a utopian future that has been freed of monsters and the systems which created and upheld them. But then she meets Pet, a dangerous creature claiming to be hunting a monster still among them, prepared to stop at nothing to find them. While I personally found the word-building in Pet lacking, it deftly handles dark subjects of what makes a human a monster.

Bonus AKA I haven’t read these yet but they seem really cool

Lion's Blood by Steven Barnes

Alternate history in which Africans colonized South America while vikings colonized the North. The vikings sell abducted Celts and Franks as slaves to the South, one of which is eleven-years-old Irish boy Aidan O'Dere, who was just bought by a Southern plantation owner.

The Sound of Stars by Alechia Dow

Young adult dystopia. Ellie lives in a future where humanity is under the control of the alien Ilori. All art is forbidden, but Ellie keeps a secret library; when one of her books disappears, she fears discovery and execution. M0Rr1S, born in a lab and raised to be emotionless, finds her library, and though he should deliver her for execution, he finds himself obsessed with human music. Together the two embark on a roadtrip which may save humanity.

Womb City by Tlotlo Tsamaase

Lelah lives in future Botswana, but despite money and fame she finds herself in an unhappy marriage, her body controlled via microchip by her husband. After burying the body of an accidental hit and run, Lelah's life gets worse when the ghost of her victim returns to enact bloody vengeance.

Orleans by Sherri L. Smith

Young adult. Fen de la Guerre, living in a quarantined Gulf Coast left devestated by storms and sickness, is forced on the run with a newborn after her tribe is attacked. Hoping to get the child to safety, Fen seeks to get to the other side of the wall, she teams up with a scientist from the outside the quarantine zone.

Everfair by Nisi Shawl

A neo-victorian alternate history, in which a part of Congo was kept safe from colonisation, becoming Everfair, a safe haven for both the people of Congo and former slaves returning from America. Here they must struggle to keep this home safe for them all.

The Splinter in the Sky by Kemi Ashing-Giwa

Space opera. Enitan just wants to live a quiet life in the aftermath of a failed war of conquest, but when her lover is killed and her sister kidnapped, she's forced to leave her plans behind to save her sister.

Honorary mentions AKA these didn't really work for me but maybe you guys will like them: The City We Became (Great Cities duology) by N.K. Jemisin, The Lesson by Cadwell Turnbull, The A.I. Who Loved Me by Alyssa Cole

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peaterookie · 3 months

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More Info abt Merman Lupin AU

I'm not posting anything for day 5 of lupin week (prepping for next drawings + i have no idea what to draw for it) so i'll post some extra stuff about my au!

Character Sheet:

before, i didn't really have a specific species of shark to model him off of, so i did like a 3 minute research on google and landed on the carribean reef shark! it's mainly cuz they're one of the friendliest sharks.

yeah, merman lupin's a bit of a cutie in this au. mostly cuz he does not know any life of crime. he doesn't have a reason to hurt anybody. don't imagine him as some sort of 'innocent cinnamon roll' though. he's still lupin after all.

the gun shot wound is there because of his interaction with zenigata as mentioned before in my prev thread.

like the og lupin, he really doesn't understand when to stop getting into dangerous situations. he only sees humans as funny creatures to watch. sometimes, he even tries to scare people by putting on makeup and covering himself up with bones and kelp. he's built up a reputation for himself as some sort of sea monster around the east coast of japan because of his tomfoolery.

other than messing with humans, his other hobby is collecting cool shiny stuff and racking up a huge collection that he keeps all in a cave somewhere in the pacific. he doesn't just collect jewels, but other human nitnacks from machines to forks. he even knows how to use them! he's a smart fella

---

that's most of what i have for his personality. now for a little history lesson.

i made this au back in june 2022, you can tell cuz my art style looks a bit strange. fujiko was intended to be the second person he meets instead of goemon.

i decided against fujiko because they might not get along sometimes given their complicated dynamic in the manga, plus goemon makes sense to be one doing shit in the middle of the ocean.

lupin was able to go in land without any consequences, now he dies if he stays for too long. (it's due to the crystal's power not being powerful enough to keep him alive if he strays too far from where he died

old merman lupin also had gills! i realized after that it's too complicated of a choice given how sharks have to move all the time to keep breathing, so now he functions like a sea mammal.

and yeah that's all thanks for reading up to this point, im really grateful for the praise i got for this au. it genuinely made me so happy!! i would've never expect this much people to like my au...

maybe ill do more of this in the future.

#lupin iii #lupin the third #lupin iii manga #peaterookie art #shin lupin iii #jigen daisuke #goemon ishikawa xiii #fujiko mine #merman lupin

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sovietpostcards · 8 months

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I’m not sure if its late for questions but I suppose it can’t hurt to try. Where are typical places to go on vacation for Russians? For example, Americans often go to visit islands in the Carribean, southern states like Florida, and places in South America like Mexico. I’ve heard Australians often visit Indonesia. So what are popular vacation destinations for Russians? Is vacationing common or is it a thing only rich people really do? Like my family has only been on a couple actual vacations, mostly we go camping locally because its much cheaper.

Common domestic vacation destinations are the South of Russia (it's a small area and it's always crowded) - Sochi, Anapa, all towns and villages along the Black Sea coast and Azov sea coast. Kislovodsk and the whole Mineral Springs area - known for, you guessed it, its mineral springs. Kaliningrad - a small piece of Europe jammed between Lithuania and Poland where you can go without a foreign passport. Definitely Crimea - a top holiday destination throughout the years, so much coastline for the vitamin D deprived Russians.

Of out-of-country destinations, I can name Turkey (often cheaper than Sochi), Abkhazia. For the Asian part of Russia, I hear they go to China and Korea a lot as it's cheaper than flying to Europe/Moscow.

Taking vacations is a privilege I'd say. A lot of people can't afford it. For many the best possible destination is their grandparents' village. Still, a lot of people try to take at least one vacation in the summer and make some memories. 30% of Russians have a valid foreign passport (for travelling out of the country), so that kind of travel is way less common.

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17webs · 2 months

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#0032. ❝ COAST GREEN: PSD COLORING

❝ DESCRIPTION: A psd coloring with an emphasis on dark red and green. It's a rework of an old psd coloring, named Caribbean Green. ❝ POC_FRIENDLY?: Yes and should be used as such. Adjust where needed. ❝ BASED_ON: An old psd coloring named Carribean Green. ❝ PRICE: Free / Pay what you want.

❝ ALERT: DOWNLOAD ON: KO-FI

❝ CREDIT?: Credit is mandatory and should be placed somewhere on your blog, carrd, or anything else you have. ❝ RULES?: Standard resource rules apply ( don't claim as yours, steal, etc.). ❝ SHARE?: Reblog this post if you're using this resource, saving it, etc. ❝ EDIT: You can modify the psd coloring layers to fit your needs. ❝ CREATIVE_COMMONS: This psd coloring is available for personal use only.

❝ SUPPORT ME ON KO-FI

#roleplay resources #rp resources #psd coloring #roleplay psd #rp psd #poc friendly psd #poc psd #*& mine: psd coloring #dailyresources #fcsources #hisources #supportcontentcreators

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sygol · 1 year

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feed me sand right now, put sand in my mouth asap as possib—

*PATOOIE* *cough cough* EYUck

wtf i can tell this is boxed sand. do i look like some sort of philistine to you? i only eat hand-collected high-tide premium of the carribean coasts,

huh? theres a woke campaign about how industrial capitalism is pilfering the beaches of the cayman islands? ugh, i have to watch my public image.. no bother, your finest pacific island sand will have to do

#j9

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proton-wobbler · 5 months

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Warbler Showdown; Bracket 2, Poll 4

Palm Warbler (Setophaga palmarum)

IUCN Rating: Least Concern

Range: most of Southern Canada, from Alberta and the Northwest Territories to Maine, overwintering along both the East and West coasts of the US, as well as the Carribean and Central America.

Habitat: breeds in open coniferous forests, or partially open habitat with scattered trees and heavy undergrowth- preferably in boggy areas or near water. They don't seem to mind drier habitats when overwintering, being found in a variety of woodland, second-growth, and thicket habitats, as well as savannas and open fields.

St. Lucia Warbler (Setophaga delicata)

IUCN Rating: Least Concern

Range: St. Lucia Island, in the Caribbean

Habitat: They seem to prefer the deciduous and semi-evergreen seasonal forests in the lowlands, but as a habitat generalist, they can be found in most forests throughout the island.

Image Sources: Palm (Megan Buers); St. Lucia (David Hollie)

#NWW Showdown #palm warbler #st lucia warbler #setophaga #parulidae #animal poll #bird poll

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curetapwater · 13 days

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I think the reason I quite like The Little Mermaid 2023 is because, yes, it doesn't especially need to exist and is part of a wider trend I dislike. But as its own entity I think it's a decent expansion of the source material. It was less about fixing what wasn't broken (although there were still shades of that with the unnecessary lyric changes) and more about just coming at the same story from a different angle. I especially love the way it emphasizes the forbidden romance aspect of Ariel and Eric's relationship, how it plays up the prejudices that attempt to pull them apart. The new thematic layer of making Ariel and Eric an allegory for cross-cultural relationships is not applied in a way that says "the 1989 movie was wrong for not including this" but in a "oh here's a neat direction we could take this" way. Ariel and Eric are absolutely the heart of this movie, and their performances are by far the highlights. And I like little details like Ariel attempting to taste everything that smells nice, or her getting to learn what it actually feels like to be burned by fire. To me, the movie largely approaches the source material from a place of respect.

Obviously it has its flaws (stares pointedly at Miku Binder Sebastian) and I think it could've taken its deviations from the 1989 movie still farther. And yeah it does exist as a result of a wider problem. But I quite like it on its own merits. Plus it's just nice to have one of my biggest kins being portrayed as a black girl living off the coast of a Carribean island okay sue me.

I do intend for it to be the last of these Disney remakes I give my time to tho, because I like this particular movie but do not want to support the wider trend.

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zorciarkrildrush · 10 months

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I think maybe the most visibly autistic I've ever done is very recent - for the past couple of years I knew being enthusiastic about flags is a thing (r/vexillology and of course, maybe more importantly r/vexillologycirclejerk) and I found it nice in passing but not more than that.

However, since I am determined to waste a significant portion of my workdays, a couple of weeks ago while browsing a news site I encountered a silly little 5-question flag quiz. Can I recognize flags like Venezuela at a glance, or at least know it's not Djibouti? Generally speaking I know the African flag color scheme, but if it's not an easy multiple-choice question, apparently I'm kind of lost.

Things happened rather quickly and I became very determined to just, always succeed. I need to know all of them. Finally I landed on this quiz: https://flagpedia.net/quiz

Which is rather inclusive (i.e, some flags are of territories controlled by other countries, but still have their own significantly used flag) and is apparently regularly updated with the designs from Wikipedia. I experienced this first hand when the flag for Afghanistan was the old one one day, and the new, Taliban one the next.

Most flag quiz sites will still, in fact, use the 2013-2021 version.

So, 254 flags on the list, an inordinate amount of them sporting the union jack with some random coat of arms like so:

(This is Fiji specifically but I promise you there's a lot of these fuckers)

And every quiz I finished was with several dozen mistakes, due to territories like these, and random islands in the Carribean or Polynesia or off the coast of Africa, or just small countries in Africa and South America and so on where their flags are just not really common knowledge.

But as I said, I became both determined to always succeed and determined to waste company time. So, doing it once or twice every work day, I've started narrowing my incompetence, remembering new and interesting designs (and also looking up what's up with those places - who knew the Comoros even exist, that they have less than 1 million people in population, and that their government bureaucracy is so wildly inefficient it harms the economy in large, tangible percentages?) and developing little ways of memorizing them. If you see a Union Jack design with waves on the coat of arms, it's either the Falkland Islands:

Recognized by the "Desire the right" wording, and I guess there's a sheep too, or it's the Cayman Islands:

With some thing or other that isn't "Desire the right".

Ireland has this widely recognized flag:

But don't mix it up with the Ivory Coast (Côte d'Ivoire):

Ireland is known for being green, and "starts" with green. If it looks like Ireland but doesn't start with green, you know what it is instead.

Just tons and tons of these little tricks, dubbed ezelsbruggetje by the Dutch (Little donkey bridges! Random little tricks of memorization!), so that I can tell places at a glance, confusing or no.

No, don't ask about Monaco and Indonesia or Chad and Romania, I have no answers for you except sometimes I can tell Chad by the shade of blue.

So a week ago my mistakes have been lowered to about 3-5, slightly ambiguous flags like Gabon and Bolivia being responsible for it mainly (and like one last pesky Union Jack island or something), and last week it was lowered to one (fucking Bolivia still), and now it's at 0. I can repeat it and I have a very good chance at doing it completely open ended (provided I have tolerance for spelling mistakes and lack of accents, e.g with Sao Tome).

And there is no point, this is just A Thing I Know Now and it will be Stuck In My Head Forever. I always had reasons to suspect I'm somewhere on the spectrum, with special interests and social maladjustment and so on, but this is maybe the most egregious, forefront example.

Also trains are cool but like, everybody knows that, right?

Oh and if you reached this far, here are some of my favorite flags in no particular order, with no significance attached to the country itself:

Seychelles, the one, the only, the legend.

Morrocco, clean, set apart from the rest of Africa and/or Arabic countries, can be interpreted as occult by those so inclined, has insane harmony with the flag of Israel.

Iran, easily set apart from the somewhat similar but simpler Tajikistani flag by the repeating Takbir along the bands.

New Caledonia, recognized by whatever this thing is (it's a traditional Kanak totem-like structure placed on roofs?)

And honestly there's maybe a few dozen more worth mentioning but I've been putting off my housechores for long enough.

#selfpost #vexillology #long post #very rambly #autism

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