👼w/ lucifer, no mc
"I can’t seem to forget the halo that I used to see." - Lucifer
cw: alcohol, Nightbringer season 1 spoilers
The amber liquid in Lucifer's glass smells dark and sweet.
He's had it a few times before, at the demon prince's invitation, but it's still a bit strange to him, this thing called Demonus. It's not like the ambrosial sweetness of what he used to drink in the Celestial Realm, honey-bright and delicate as flower petals in the wind. That had been airy and full of light, tasting of sunbeams on the trees from which the fruits were picked to make it.
Demonus, however, is something completely different. Actually, he's surprised to find he likes it. It's rich and heady, with a spiciness that lingers on his palate long after each sip. Indulgent, sweet not like honey but like sin. A hint of noxious brimstone burns at the back of his throat as he drinks, rising like a burst of sulfurous smoke directly into his nostrils. It leaves a slow trail of fire through him as it goes down, like lava running down the side of a volcano.
Each sip is an inescapable reminder of where he is now -- of what he is now. Of what they all are, now.
It's not that Lucifer regrets the war. Regrets losing, perhaps -- of course, since no one starts a conflict like that with the intent to fail. But even losing, on its own, would have been fine. There's a sense of freedom to his new life, here in the Devildom. He can say and do whatever he likes, unbeholden to his Father. Here, the insistent, nagging doubts swirling in his mind every day have stopped, no longer screaming to be heard, no longer screaming to be spoken. He had finally spoken them. He had fought for them. And if it only involved him, he would make the same decision a thousand times over again.
But it didn't. It wasn't only him. And now, he's not the only one paying for it.
His brothers had made the choice to follow him, and for that, he is grateful. He is grateful, every single day, not to have landed here alone. But they had followed him because they'd believed in him. His rebellion failing was one thing. What he really can't stand is that he failed them.
Lucifer sighs into his glass as Raphael's declaration from earlier that day rings in his head again -- "The Celestial Gates are open to the six of you, that you may pass through once more."
He won't return; now that he's tasted this freedom, he knows he'll never be satisfied in the Celestial Realm again. But, the others...
Maybe Raphael is right. Maybe his brothers should go. Even if it means leaving him and Satan behind, maybe it's for the best. Maybe it's true -- the wings at their backs should be white. Even now, he can't seem to forget the halos that he used to see over each of their heads.
It's his fault those halos don't shine over them anymore. It's his fault they've become horns instead. It's his fault they aren't angels anymore, and he doesn't want it to be his fault that they stay that way. They won't like leaving him, but who is he to ask them to stay?
It was his war. It was his failure. It should be his punishment to bear. Alone.
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steve thought billy hated him, so when the blonde gave him a pretty smile in the locker room he was really fucking confused.
he’s confused when billy pushes him into the passenger seat of the camaro and says, “cmon let me take you out pretty boy”
he’s still confused when billy buys him a shake and burger then keeps driving till they reach a vacant lot at the quarry.
he’s actually bewildered when as they eat their burgers he doesn’t completely hate the younger boys company. conversation was surprisingly smooth and billy was honestly pretty funny.
steve only feels happy when billy drops his back off at his car, hours after the sun went down, and kisses him lightly. the blonde whispers, “please tell me you want to do that again” the look on his face makes him look younger, less tough. he smiles big back at billy, “i would really like that”.
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how this scene should’ve really happened in my opinion:
mr. keating: come on todd, step up. let’s put you out of your mistery.
todd: i-i didn’t do it. i didn’t write a poem.
mr. keating: you little shit-
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Roman : Did you know there’s a fruit that gives you an entire daily serving of potassium?
Logan, meaning the fruit : That’s bananas.
Roman : I know, I was shocked too!
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