#but regardless I still reached it

[serenit-teas]

Me, riddled with delusion <- (is a 6'3 P enjoyer and believer)

I just!!! I know everyone has commented on it in some way shape or form and I guess it's my turn to throw my two cents in😔 god I should not have the freedom to ramble on this app

Like!! This guy, this one man battalion is terrifying in concept. A puppet with an incredibly rare (and deadly) ability to lie, with advanced combat skills and power that only seems to enhance thanks to the Ergo that can be encountered in his ventures, and an imposing figure to round it all out. In theory it screams threat, danger.

But then you meet him, see how meek and gentle he is with everyone in Hotel Krat. Once, witnessing Spring recoil at his advance, hissing and all but swatting at him. Though being able to emote was one of the few things he could not yet do, you swear he seemed to wilt after the encounter with the feline. During the rockier moments of becoming acquainted with the cat, he would never grow frustrated after the failed attempts, understanding and respecting that she's not comfortable around him. He would simply leave her be, and try again later.

He rarely speaks, and if he does it's one word or a clipped phrase, not out of rudeness or anything of the sort, it's new and quite frankly, there's a high chance that he simply wouldn't know what to say.

There's something of a quite excitement and giddiness in P when he brings a new record back to the Hotel, not only does it mean that he gets to experience what this recent find has to offer, but also that any of the other residents of the Hotel can enjoy the spoils of his journey.

He listens and takes heed in what people say, no matter if it's critical information in regards to his outings, passing comments of bygone days, or just ramblings in any variety, he listens, makes the people around him feel heard and understood. (Even if some things go over his head)

He'll realise some time or later that he LIKES making the people he's met happy*, seeing their faces light up in glee or relief.

It's a small victory in the hell they're all surviving.

Every time I think of P I imagine this gentle giant who is so achingly soft spoken and sweet, who is aware of his immense strength and takes care to never harm those he treasures. And in turn that leads to the BEST juxtaposition of the raw carnage he's capable of! This guy can rip through sturdy puppets and manmade horrors like they're wet tissue paper, has stared down monstrosities and come out on top, can bounce back from injuries that would leave others utterly mangled at best.

He is a terrifying concept and there's no denying what he can easily do if he so chose, but his conscious effort to exhibit the utmost care when surrounded by fragility makes my heart MELT. Soft boy P will forever have me hooked no matter what, but there's something about a tall boy with a heart of gold (literally) who, despite still learning how to live and experience, understands his presence around others.🥺

*(Not that he would want to see them upset, I think at first there would be a nuetral understanding of "What happens here affects me and my progress." Just a thought though!)

#AND I WOULD JUST LIKE TO SAY!!! #SHORT BOY P LOVER AND ENJOYERS ARE JUST AS VALID!!! #YALL DONT HAVE TO CRANE YOUR NECK UP TO LOOK AT HIM #EASY SMOOCH ACCESS #DONT HAVE TO REACH UP UP UP TO TRACE HIS FRECKLES #TALL AND SHORT P ARE BOTH VALID AND WONDERFUL AND HE LOVES YOU REGARDLESS!!! #Have a hc that whenever he's feeling nervous or shy or flustered you can hear his springs and cogs working overtime #and that!!! is what you do to him!!! you make rattled silverware noises come out of him!!!! #clinking like a mfer i know!!! because he told me!!!! #lies of p x reader #pinocchio x reader #kinda but still #text post #chels mumbles #chels writes

[sesamenom]

Reverse Gondolin AU family portrait

#silm #silmarillion #idril #tuor #earendil #reverse gondolin au #is this baby earendil's first appearance in the au? #so I decided Idril & Tuor still get married in this au #mostly bc I want Earendil to exist. #i haven't figured out what I want to do with Lomion #but maybe he can be obsessed with tyelpe instead of idril bc they're friends in this au and idril showed up a lot later? #also c&c + celebrimbor moved to gondolin instead of nargothrond since Aredhel lives there #you may notice that tuor has a diff hairstyle & outfit in the au! #this is bc fashion trends in reverse gondolin are more influenced by aredhel's choices than turgons for obvious reasons #hence the white cloaks and shorter (but equally fancy) sleeves #also idril is lord of the mole in the au #my headcanon is that 'lord' as of the lords of gondolin is just the title regardless of gender for the specific role #'lady' is a different role with much less administrative stuff and more social/public-appearance type stuff #aredhel is the white lady of gondolin bc she does Not want to be a lord #so she does the occasional royalty-waves-and-smiles-from-a-tower type event when necessary #but other than that she doesnt have political duties #idril is the administrative/political leader of the Mole in the au hence she is a lord #shes also the lady of the wing bc she married tuor and is part of the house of the wing's nobility but doesn't do their political stuff #and tuor is the lady of the mole #reverse turgon after arrival has less of a interest in politics than canon turgon (the whole eol deal was rather traumatizing and he needs #time to recover) #so he's not one of the Lords but he is colloquially ar-feinion #his official title is some sort of prince #after he reaches a more stable emotional state he helps a lot w the political stuff when aredhel is out #so maeglin doesn't have todo everything himself

[forestofsprites]

truly my good friends larry trainor of doom patrol and castiel angel of the lord

#very important that everyone knows i have two hands and i use them each for holding onto the hands of #these two gay tortured vessels of cosmic proportions #i don't know if i could conceive of larry and castiel getting along. i'm not sure how tangential i can get #but they have much in common #the us government guinea pig / heaven's favourite lobotomy patient parallels alone #i think of rama being able to reach a leaded hand and comfort larry during the keeg flashbacks #and parallel them with the spn dungeon scene. with cas held by naomi switching back and forth until dean breaks the connection #that is a very pleasant parallel #pleasant as in harmoniously comparable #no i still haven't finished doom patrol. yes i am terrified of finding out how it ends #it's been 3 months? 4? since the final half of the season premiered but i Know regardless of it being #“good” or “bad” it's gnna fuck me up!!!!!!!!! oh man!!!!!!!!! #anyway. autism. i sure am

[punbeam]

"Maybe people were right when they said I shouldn't call the dragging out of Nandermo queerbaiting, after all it's clear that they're endgame and are going to get togeth-"

#wwdits #nandermo #wwdits spoilers #I'm more disappointed that my cynicism was right unless this is a red herring but that's what all fandoms say #I'm not being fujoshi about this it's annoying to me from a story investment standpoint #also ngl I'm hating the vibes from the 'who wants to see THAT' comment for like numerous reasons #like it either feels vaguely heteronormative or like. fatphobic though idk if I'm reaching there #idk the absurdity of 'that would be problematic' in the context of this show still makes it feel like this is yanking the audience's chain #but regardless I think whether or not you love the show #even with there being queer characters Nandermo as of rn w/ these comments is bait

[rxttenfish]

PLEASE tell us more about virina mishra im such a sucker for nextgens

OOPS FUCK I GOT DISTRACTED AGAIN AND FORGOR TO ANSWER THIS

virina!!! my beloved virina!!!! littlest froggy!!!

aaravi and miranda very much both wanted to actually, you know, have a family. its one of those things where you come from someplace so shitty and so terrible, that you just cannot imagine someone else going through that same thing, and you cannot bear the thought of making someone else go through the same thing. to be fair, they are both TERRIFIED of just repeating the past and ending up in the exact same loop that their parents did, terrified of just heaving back on the same generational trauma and wreck of a childhood, but there comes a point in being afraid of something where you just need to get rid of this fear. its too constant, its too forever, its too eternal. sitting through it and avoiding it isn't making it go away, and they already fucked up avoiding it by finding each other and loving each other, so dancing around the issue isn't helping. instead, what they mutually land on is just... a want to prove that fear wrong. a want to prove that fear wrong, to prove that they aren't doomed to be just a weapon and just a source of death in all its forms, that they can hold something in their hands and make it grow. best way to avoid repeating the past is to take responsibility by the leash, after all. they want to go back in time, to give themselves the childhood that they always missed, and the best way they figured to do that is to give that to someone else.

this is something that very much existed since their relationship started to get serious with each other, and something that's been in the background the entire time since, so its not like its a mystery or anything. if anything, they've been using this want as a motivation, as a need to keep going even at the worst of times. they will have this happy future. they will make it through this together. they will make it work. no more ifs, no more buts, no more doubt. stop living in the doubt and start acting as though their happy end is a foregone conclusion and something that they are going to have no matter what, give no room for fear or guilt or shame or depression or self hatred to sneak in. they will be happy. they will make someone else happy. they will be someplace safe, not just for themselves, but for their loved ones too. they will be good. they will be.

even after everything blows over (mainly from miranda's family, she is still crown princess and stepping away from that was never going to be an option they gave her), it still takes a few years for them to broach the topic of having a kid for-real. just to make sure everything's settled. just to make sure everything's safe.

they have virina later in life than some of their other friends or just in general, but they were planned and wanted for so long that the wait is worth it. the name, as i've mentioned, comes from aaravi. she knows her mom was a... complicated woman, she knows her own raising wasn't perfect and that there were things that she still cant fully forgive her mother for, but she had a hard life too. she too deserved better. despite it all, aaravi still loves her mom, despite despite despite. and so she does the best thing that she can to honor her mom, to honor her memory, to give her the life that she never had the same as aaravi herself, and gives it to virina. the mishra last name was a no-brainer already, miranda already look aaravi's last name and preferred being a mishra over a vanderbilt anyday.

years later, virina also earns the nickname of "froggy" - primarily because of their own love for the animal, constantly finding them and bringing them in from outside. likewise, miranda and aaravi decide to raise them genderless, and to let them decide for themselves how they want to be referred to when they're older.

virina doesn't really take much after either of their moms, though. mostly they're quiet, shy, keep to themselves. where both of their moms are brash and dominant, very confident in themselves and willing to bowl over quieter personalities, virina seldom speaks, and when they do, its soft-spoken. they get easily spooked and cry easily, especially when it comes to other people. they cling to their moms legs, hide behind them when other people come around, prefer the company of animals over other people, tend not to like new things or new people and greatly prefer sticking to their simple, easy routine. they just can't figure out other people, seemingly, not understanding them or how to make friends or even what's appropriate or not to say in a conversation.

this isn't to say they aren't deeply intelligent and curious. they quickly learn to love venturing outside with their moms, playing in the garden or chasing bugs and frogs. they come in with sticks and rocks, make mud potions, try to build things out of sticks and befriend birds. they prefer books over people, ending up much more of a bookworm than either of their moms ever were, and ends up a very big nerd as they get older. theyre close and affectionate with the friends they do make, but this is a small handful of their very most trusted, and they never get much better at figuring out social norms.

in time, they lean a little bit more towards the femme side of things, growing their hair out long and liking long, swishy skirts that they can spin and sway over and over, that doesnt cling too tight to their legs. they end up needing glasses, and end up picking a pair thats large and circular, making their eyes seem all the more owlish. they settle on they/she, but never have particularly strong opinions about gender regardless. they can be blunt and quick to frustration, especially if they feel people arent understanding them, and are forever going to be deeply embarrassed over how their moms dote on them. i very much see them getting intensely interested and starting to study either linguistics, literature, history, geology, or any biology that takes them closer to the marshes and wetlands that they love.

they never think very much about how one of their moms used to be a princess, heir to a kingdom. beyond an instance as a kid that ended with them dropping a training sword repeatedly and crying, they never get very interested in following the slayer line of work. they fuss over small stakes, have their moms grate on them sometimes in both of their old ways, and they live a normal life.

#all the care guide says is 'biomass' #miravi.txt #monster prom #asks #Anonymous #anon #you might notice this as a theme with my fankids #in that i very much LOVE making them be the opposite of their parents #or otherwise be a personality that would have - if it were one of their peers - have annoyed their parents #because thats just the nature of kids! you have no promise that theyll be just like you! #theyre just their own little people! and you cant control that! #and hopefully. you come to accept that and love them regardless. #because theyre still just little people. they have no control over this. they need you to take care of them. #and thats okay actually. #...... also yeah it annoys me to no end when people make fankids and just. fuse the parents. #instead of having them be their own character with their own feelings and personality.... #like! nah thats a whole ass other person! they came from these other two people but that doesnt mean shit! #also tbf i think miri and ravi would be THRILLED that virina would get annoyed by them sometimes #specifically in the sense of FUCK YES LOOK AT HOW FAR THEY'VE COME #they have reached the point where the habits that they developed out of necessity and a need to survive #are now just annoyances and no longer appropriate for the world they created together #THEY MADE IT. LOOK AT HOW GOOD THEY'VE DONE!!! #fully the type of moms to kiss all over virina's head and hug them to death while they squirm and whine that #MOOOOMS. YOU EMBARRASSING THEM. #what bliss to be embarrassing!!!

[jacksprostate]

sorry this is once again my monthly 'i'm in love with people and our capacity for compassion even in the face of deep deep cruelty, even though i've seen worse and worse things, come to terms with so much, it's my love of humanity that has let me avoid rotting, encouraged me to grow and chase my own place in helping everyone around me" post

#im really excited for the job im starting. still about a month or so out but heading towards a career change sort of that im really excited #for. im just... i actually used to be very cynical and i struggled to see the point through all the terrible things in the world #but for many reasons #even as i discovered worse and worse things #ive developed... resiliency i never thought id have #born out of this appreciation for those and the world around me #and i wish i could share it. i see so many people in my old shoes #im still growing. so much to do #but im at a level of contentment.. idk. i couldntve dreamed of #and it took effort #it is not /easy/ to face things and believe in good regardless #but. its rewarding. i wish it for all of you #on a similar but different note ive been reaching a point of being more myself in social situations rather than just a chameleon #and ive been lucky enough to have the people around me the past two years or so be very supportive in a way that has truly let me grow and #become a better version of myself #and its sort of been this positive feedback loop. because the more confident and passionate you are the more people are delighted by your #eccentricies #i used to be so beat down #i still struggle so much #but. im at a place i never thought id be #no doubt there will be struggles in the future #hell its not like things are perfect now #still so much. major things to improve on #but idk. i am happy #and its a very full sense of happiness. #full and aware and strong #thats what i wish for all of you :)

[daz4i]

man reading akutagawa's suicide note and reaching that part

"In the meantime, in my present state, nature looks more beautiful than ever. You will doubtless laugh at the contradiction of loving nature and planning at the same time to kill myself. But the beauty of nature is apparent to me only because it is reflected in my eyes during my last hours."

it hits hard man. is there a name for the emotion you feel when reading something written by someone who lived years, decades, centuries, millennia before you were even born and feeling so painfully seen?

#like not to vent on main. but even in the times of my worst suicidal thoughts i still love nature #i have a hard time loving anything else but i will always look at the sky in awe or enjoy seeing animals around me #but it doesn't diminish those thoughts - it used to for a while but not anymore. but the love it still there #I'd even say the sky looks more beautiful on my worst nights. sunrise shining through the window as i reach for a knife. very poetic i know #so. while i don't get exactly what he went through. i think he gets me regardless. without even knowing of my existence #suicide //

[toastsnaffler]

sometimes I wish I was a more interesting + charismatic person just so I could keep conversations going bc I like sharing space with other ppl but they routinely lose all interest and leave once I run out of things to say/start talking abt things that don't concern them :-(

#and boy do I run out of things to say so fast when I'm talking to friends who ik dont give a fuck abt any of my interests... #theres only so much i can make small talk or ask them questions abt their own interests/lives yknow. man #it just makes me feel like im constantly competing with smth else for other ppls attention all the time + constantly losing #eg. when i say smth + my flatmate reaches for her headphones a little dark souls banner appears across my vision like INTERACTION FAILED #and i can feel my rsd + insecurities praying on it like the more i feel this way the more it prophetically fulfils itself #by making me less willing to try and take up space so i become a smaller and smaller person around others #it frustrates me a lot sometimes and i dont rly have the will rn to undo that and force myself to take up more space regardless #ik this sounds like a water is wet complaint like oh nooo woe is me people get bored of me when i talk abt boring things (!!) #but when im spending time w ppl i like i enjoy listening to them talk even if im not interested in the subject bc its Them talking #and if they care abt smth then its worth hearing abt!! to me anyway. but it rly feels like no one reciprocates that idk #oh well not that it matters. at least i like the shit im into so i can talk to myself abt it in my head or on this site lmao #and i like myself as a person even if other people dont so theres always that. ur no 1 should always be urself <3 #voicing this makes me feel so stupid + embarrassed urgh. i hate being anxious abt dumb shit i hate being the sort of person who worries #that their friends privately dislike/just tolerate them or whatever bc id never want a friend to worry abt whether i thought that abt them #and im not naturally a very insecure person!! i think im just feeling particularly vulnerable atm bc of the season + jobhunting so long #+ the fact im dissatisfied with my current social life + still feel very wobbly from not having other ppl i can trust or rely on etcetcetc #and thats just bleeding into other areas. and it sucks a lot. but theres nothing to be done abt it rn bc im not going to communicate it #to other ppl bc im not pathetic enough to make my anxieties someone elses problem + beg for pity attention im too proud for that 👍 #anyway. gonna play some noita + then i rly need to work out today bc thats probs part of why im feeling so shite #if ur reading this ignore me im just venting itll pass. i hope youre having a nice day :^) #.vent #.diaries

[corvigae]

My favorite part of The Sims 2 is when Vidcund Curious said "It's Cundin' time!" and Cunded all over the place

#here it is. the dumbest post i'll ever make. it took us 10 years but we finally reached it. #ts2 #the sims 2 #vidcund curious #vidding and cunding and vidding and cunding and vidding and #yes i know it's an old meme but i'm still posting it regardless

[roxyandelsewhere]

SPN moments but abstract [18/?] - Dean being healed in 1x12 Faith

inprnt | society6 | redbubble | ko-fi

Posting below the cut some photos showing the gold accents the scan didn't catch:

#this one isn't in any way the best thing i've done but the scan makes it look sooo ugly compared to the real thing sorry guys #spn #spnart #spn art #spnabstract #mine.caro #this one was honestly just me trying to figure out what to do with the acrylics parts i'd already painted with nothing specific in mind #and this is what i came up with but i still might do something faith!dean related in the future that i start with that in mind #i kept thinking it was the wrong colors for this and it should be more blueish but then i realized i was thinking of the eps color scheme #and that's not how this works #but anyways. the overall idea is that there's a line between dean and god. el greco painting but horizontal #left side holy right side mundane. but the mundane side has falling pieces of holiness like falling particles in the sea and the odd plant #the holy hand reaches out to dean and he kneels down for it.reduced to tangran shapes. and he reaches out to it in turn #and it swallows him up. god's eye looking above. hell's eye watching him below. one right in front of him across the curtain of holiness #(purgatory). basically putting the faith moment in context with the whole dean vs god thing and also his future journey between heaven&hell #and he's lonely! and yearning! he reaches out and tries to catch what's out there regardless of believing its out there or not #and it goes right through him. i did it as specks of rain that pierce him like knives bc anything bigger and more central would have #looked like stigmata. and that's not really dean's game. those aren't his parallels here. well kinda but not in this sense #i get if this one doesn't really hit bc i did it just to finish a wip and it loses A Lot with the gold gone #but i still wanted to post it

[youforgivehowgodforgives]

i have a really convoluted theory about will graham re: water symbolism

#in the tags because i'm self conscious. #basically i think the ocean represents birth/rebirth/death + rivers represent gradual change/erosion in will's story #AND backstory ..... most of which is speculation. but hear me out #probably born by the ocean -> traveled upriver as a kid -> became a cop in new orleans but got shot + disillusioned (symbolic death) #moved to virginia near his wolf trap river (gradual change up until the beginning of the series) #then the river motif in s1 and s2 (gradual erosion) #then mizumono (ocean of blood) leads directly into will crossing the entire fucking ocean. death/rebirth #at the hands of hannibal #but that rebirth didn't do the trick obviously because he ends up back in wolf trap (to his river!) and eventually in maine (?) #i also find it interesting that we first see molly and walter coming up from fishing in the lake as if will has tasked them with #shouldering his stagnation (because lake -> stagnation) #+ THEN the series ends back at the ocean. which is why i think that the wrath of the lamb is a definitive death AND rebirth for will #regardless of whether he actually survived (...... i think he did) #regardless it would be a true death + rebirth this time because it was his own decision. woohoo autonomy ! #.................................... #who's to say whether any of this was intentional in canon .... probably not i'm totally reaching but i still think it's #fun to explore AND adds more goodies to my will graham backstory vault #ok. hope this was coherent LOL it's been cooking for months and months

[galactichelium]

I will not do the exercises given to me by my physio, whether that be because I forgot or I'm having executive dysfunction, and then be like "Man why am I in so much pain?"

#AUGH. Hate how I need to do exercises just so I can be in less pain + maybe reach an average level of strength #I have hypotonia so. Even my 16 year old sibling of whom I'm ~3 inches taller than is stronger than me #And I have noodle arms 😭 Which look especially silly compared to my stocky torso #I still need to try the other things the rheumatologist recommended #CBT therapy and a med she wants me to ask my psychiatrist abt to make sure it won't interfere with my ADHD meds #She also suggested hydrotherapy but. I'm a bit more nervous abt that considering I'm pre-top surgery. #My binders SAY that you can wear them swimming safely + are chlorine resistant but they say they're a lot harder to take off wet. #Which I worry means I'd need to get someone else to take it off of me. Which like. Augh. BUT YEAH anyway. #Iron text #Edit: Sorry a little bit more actually #My next psychiatrist appt isn't until late this month. And I am. Afraid to go through all the things I need to do to get to therapy. #With the public healthcare system you can get I think 8 psychologist appts for free per year if you get a mental health plan w your gp #But I think it also depends on the psychologist? Some might require you to pay regardless? I'm not sure #I've been to psychologists before but neither of them were that great and I'm worried it's gonna be similarly difficult now

[a-dark-starred-universe]

Bea can't count how many times she's had to carry Blake's stubborn butt to the LZ, but she knows it's a lot more than how many fingers she has.

Shout out to @black-moon-wolf / @blake-128 for such an AMAZING halo OC! I am OBSESSED with him and I am holding him gently omg!!!!

#my art #halo #halo reach #halo oc #my ocs #not my ocs #rvb #Halo Blake-128 #Halo Bea-33 #B-128 #B-33 #Halo spartan #God my head is so empty thinking about these go as teammates #they're truly such a dynamic team and i love them SO much omg!!! #despite everything Bea is still willing and ready to protect and drag Blake back to safety regardless of the situation #i love their loyalty and friendship and sibling energy with each other #it's my favorite thing and i cherish it so

[aria0fgold]

I just realized something, the Omori in MiM only saw Sunny being miserable all alone which is a scene at the beginning of the game when Sunny first woke up... Omori doesn't know about what happened to Mari.

#aria rants #i feel like mim wouldve taken an entirely different turn if omori found out that the mari in the other reality is dead #i feel like itd be a lot more angsty on omori's chapters with a whole lot of self blaming and if that happened #mim wouldve gained a few more chapters to address that but tbf tho itd still reach the same happy ending anyway #itd just have an entirely diff path to reach it but regardless of that. itd always be the same outcome of the two living happily #i think its poetic in that way if i think bout it like that. cuz with or without further knowledge of what happened to the other #reality with sunny. the ending is the same all because of sunny's first wish. he wants everyone to be happy. including a #strange self-proclaimed magician living in the mirror. and if granting that wish means fate's scales breaking #then isnt that all the sweeter? an innocent wish from a boy that just wants everything to be just how it was before being #given the burden of responsibilities to keep up with everyone's expectations? all sunny wants is happiness. #and if omori who has blamed himself for everything could be just as happy. then isnt that a wish worth making?

[garoujo]

i’m not back from hiatus nor do i plan to be for a bit but i just wanted to say that i absolutely do not condone any hate being sent to either blog on my behalf. i don’t care what they’re saying about me, please do not be unkind or return that energy under the guise that you’re defending me.

#they’re still a person regardless of everything #i’m just really tired i want this to end now #also the reason i myself didnt make the callout post [since a few asked] is simply because it wasn’t my info or findings to share #but i did appreciate someone reaching out to help me

[yeleltaan]

// Plotting call! Like this post if you'd like me to go into your DMs so we can talk ideas and see what we want to do going forward!

#hello everyone! I've been kinda quiet but feeling better #got a lot of irl stuff done that needed doing and I've been resuming my hobbies #writing continues to resist me- it's gonna be a slow process becoming comfortable here again #I'm also unsure how many are still interested in this blog- this is one way to let me know! #that being said I'm gonna try to be around more regardless #already started work on a few replies #and I've got some headcanons cooking in the back which I'll hopefully sort out soon #I might reblog this later to reach more people #ooc