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inuyashaluver · 2 months

Note

can you do reader is very body conscious but lessi helps her? lyy

you’re beautiful - alessia russo

alessia russo x reader

description: in which your girlfriend wishes you could see yourself the way she does

warnings: self loathing, insecurity, tears, slightly angsty?

a/n: YOU’RE BEAUTIFUL AND DONT LET ANYONE TELL YOU DIFFERENT, MY LOVES, thank you for the request, love you, i hope this lived up to expectations because im getting in my head again 😭❤️

⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆

you and your girlfriend, alessia, had a love so pure, it was sickeningly sweet.

people may say that the term ‘soulmates’ is overused, but alessia russo was in fact your soulmate.

she was your better half, a true soul connection that is truly authentic and genuinely profound.

this girl had you wrapped around her finger and it was very much mirrored for you. the two of you would do anything for each other, without a second thought clouding your mind.

—

you and alessia met years ago in your youth, forming a close bond with the blonde unexpectedly.

alessia in her younger years was quite shy, finding it hard to put herself out there and make friends. whereas, you on the other hand, were outgoing, always the first person to approach when someone looked like they needed a friend.

and that’s what you did. when you and alessia joined the england youth football team, you watched as alessia, wide eyed and nerve ridden, clutched her training top in her hand, you’d been told to find a partner for warm ups.

and you, with your mischievous grin and kind eyes, walked over to alessia and nudged her with your shoulder. “i’m (y/n)” you whisper, alessia looks over at you in surprise, sending you a grateful smile, “i’m alessia” she whispers back.

“you have beautiful eyes, alessia” you grin, alessia cheeks fill with pink, looking down at the pitch with a little laugh before looking back up at you.

“you have a pretty smile” alessia breathes out, you smile brightly at her, offering her a piece of gum while you conversed, unbeknowingly becoming a part of your routine that lasted for years.

you and alessia navigated the ups and downs of childhood together, forming an unbreakable bond.

the more you talked and hung out, the more you realised how perfect you were for each other. and so, at 17, you and alessia started dating, you, as usual taking the lead that alessia was very grateful for.

“russo, i think it’s time we date” you say simply, causing alessia to choke on air while the two of you walked around the pitch. “what?” she mutters, her cheeks bright pink when you interlaced your fingers together.

“i really like you, lessi,” you say earnestly, giving her a charming smile that made her heart leap out of her chest.

“i really like you too” she breathes out, both of you now looking a little sheepish, giving little squeezes of your hands while you looked at each other.

that’s when alessia closed the gap and pulled you into a kiss, you gasp in surprise against her lips, your hand moving to cradle her cheek as you pulled her closer.

it was a little clumsy at first but you both quickly found a rhythm, feeling familiar yet foreign all at the same time.

alessia’s hand makes its way to your bicep, squeezing it gently and smiling against you. eventually when the two of you pulled apart, you both broke into little fits of giggles, resting your foreheads against each other as your breath intermingled with each other. the promise of forever lingering in the air.

everyone saw how genuine your connection was, you brought out alessia’s confidence, alessia brought out your calm side. a perfect balance working together in harmony. the amount of respect, love and admiration for each other never went unnoticed by the two of you.

—

you had always played at arsenal while alessia played at manchester united, ecstatic when she decided to transfer to be closer to you.

you’d always been a woso couple favourite, the amount of edits under both of your names were insane. it only grew as alessia transferred. but something that grew in small but visible amounts, was hate.

it was inevitable, you were both in the public eye and people could be truly awful when they wanted to be. you tried not to look at it but it was incredibly hard when it was directed at you.

alessia was perfect and you could say that with your chest, and everyone else thought that. so people loved to tell you that you weren’t good enough. you weren’t fit enough.

people claiming you were using the girl even though you both have incredibly successful, established careers that no one could deny.

but it didn’t matter, you were scrutinised by a very tiny amount of people but it had a large impact. you thought you would be used to it by now but these comments for some reason just stuck with you.

you stood in front of the mirror in your shared apartment, suddenly your daily training uniform feeling tight on your body.

no matter how you moved it, it didn’t feel right. your eyes welled with tears as your eyes took in your appearance. you felt awful. you shook it off, making your way to alessia who was currently preparing protein shakes for the car.

you snuck up behind her, wrapping your arms around her middle as your chin rested on her shoulder. she was always a little taller but it didn’t matter.

“hey, babe” alessia grins, leaning back into you, “hi, lessi baby” you kiss her shoulder sweetly. she flipped around in your embrace, kissing your lips gently a couple of times, making you giggle against her. she relishes at the sound, pecking the tip of your nose before ushering you to the car.

she drove with her hand gently squeezing your thigh before you both arrived. you were feeling fine up until then, but as soon as the two of you got into training, you felt off, the comments flashing in your mind.

alessia noticed a change in your behaviour. your usual confident and vibrant self was seemingly preoccupied. you trained with her like normal, giggling and chatting but your smile never fully reached your eyes, alessia knew you better than anyone, she could see you declining.

“hey, you okay?” alessia grabs your hand when you enter the change room after training, pulling you close to her before you tried to walk away.

“yeah, baby, i’m good” you smile, kissing her sweetly, she melts into you, kissing you back with a satisfied hum before she pulled away from you.

“don’t distract me, missy” she chuckles, pinching your cheek teasingly before she wrapped her arms around you.

she pulls you close, tucking your head under her chin as she gently swayed you from side to side. you lean further into her, feeling a lump in your throat growing, desperately hoping you don’t look like you’re going to cry.

“can we go home, please?” you say softly, alessia frowns a little at that, “‘course we can,” kissing your head tenderly before dragging you to your cubby.

she sits you down, helping you into one of her hoodies before helping you change from your boots.

“russo spoils you, (y/l/n)” katie teases, “you don’t deserve this little angel” katie laughs, you knew she meant well but it sent a knife to your heart.

you throw her a pathetic smile, looking down as alessia shooed katie away, smiling up at you reassuringly, kissing your knee gently before moving up.

she quickly packs your stuff away, as well as her own and quickly changing, claiming you both could shower at home.

she essentially dragged you out of the room, opening the door for you to her car, doing your seatbelt for you and kissing you sweetly before she went to her own side.

you really didn’t deserve her.

the whole ride home, you stared out of the window, only really contributing to conversation when necessary. alessia was truly worried at this point, but not wanting to push you.

she cautiously grabbed your hand and interlaced them together, worried you’d pull away but you tightened your grip. she sent you a smile even though you weren’t looking at her, so instead she kissed the back of your hand. letting you know she was there, like always.

you both got inside and you trudged to the bathroom, closing the door behind you. alessia’s heart broke a little, you’d usually shower together in times like this, but you didn’t want anything to do with alessia she felt. so she left you alone..sort of.

she placed her ear on the door when she didn’t hear the shower start, instead hearing a heart wrenching sob escaping your throat. she couldn’t handle it anymore.

“baby, open the door, please” alessia pleaded, your sobs not relenting, “(y/n/n), come on, love” alessia tries again, hearing you cry and feeling her heart breaking. she started to panic until she heard the door unlock, not wasting any time and making her way inside.

“hey, hey, hey” she coos, bending down to your level when she sees you cry on the floor, you can’t help but cry seeing her, her own tears streaming down her face when she saw you.

“what’s wrong, love?” she asked softly, wiping your tears from your cheeks with the pads of her thumbs.

you tried to open your mouth to speak but nothing came out, her hands made their way to the sides of your neck as she directed your eyes to hers.

“breathe, baby” her thumbs brush against the underside of your jaw, you try to mimick her breathing, little hiccups resulting from your sobs as you and alessia looked at each other tearfully.

she didn’t know why you were crying but all the pain you felt, she felt.

you both sat there for a second, just in silence with occasional sniffles feeling the room. alessia waited until you were ready, her patience unlimited when it comes to you.

“lessi” you choke out, “i’m here, i’m here, baby” alessia smiles sadly, moving to kiss your cheek gently, only making another teardrop from your duct.

“why, though? you shouldn’t be with me” you hiccup, her eyebrows furrow, looking at you confused, she tries to speak up but you cut her off, “alessia, you deserve so much better” you sniffle, alessia looks slightly furious.

“i don’t deserve better, i deserve you, you’re more than anything i deserve” she says sternly, “baby, what happened?” she tries again, “i hate my body, i hate the way i look, i hate that someone as perfect as you has to be seen with me” you sniff, alessia looks almost offended, her hands dropping from your face to grab your hands, both of you sitting on the floor.

“(y/n) (y/l/n)” she starts, “my baby, your beauty is out of this world” she says adoringly, “you’re absolutely gorgeous, you’re so kind, you’re so strong, you’re perfect” she smiles, moving one of her hand up to cradle your cheek again. “who put this stupid idea in you head?” alessia tucks a stray peice of hair behind your ear,

“online” you admit quietly, alessia had enough at that, she lifts you up off the floor, your legs wrapping around her waist as she carried you to the bedroom.

she placed you down with a sweet kiss to your forehead, standing behind you in front of the mirror. you shy your gaze away, looking down at the floor, unable to look at yourself.

“look up, my love” she whispers, kissing your temple as her hands held your hips. you exhale deeply before looking in the mirror, making eye contact with alessia through the mirror.

“i love your legs, they’re so strong, they’ve walked through challenges, through accomplishments. they let you walk to me, they let you run, they’re perfect” she whispers in your ear, a frown was still evident on your face so alessia continued.

“your waist, your hips, i love holding it whenever i can, i love feeling you breathing, knowing you’re with me,” she smiles, kissing your cheek, a little hint of a smile playing at your lips that had her brightening.

“next your arms, also very strong” she winks at you, making you huff out a little laugh, “whenever your arms are around me, i feel so safe, i love when you squeeze me when you get excited, they also have your hands attached and we know why i love your hands” she teases, you laugh at that, throwing your head back with a smile when she chuckles, placing a little kiss on your neck,

“i love your neck, i love your shoulders, i love your pretty face, your gorgeous eyes that light up when you get excited, and your smile” she breathes out,

“you know how much i love your smile, it brightens up the whole room, my beautiful, beautiful girl” she says a little tearfully. you turn around and just look up at her, “i love you” she says softly, that’s when you pull her into a bone crushing hug.

“i love you, i love you so much” you sniff, kissing her cheek repeatedly before burying your face into the base of her neck.

she hugs you tightly, relieved that you felt better, “don’t listen to any of the idiots online, baby” she says into your hair, her hands rubbing comforting circles over your (her) hoodie.

you nod into her skin, letting her drag you to the shower where she really showed you some appreciation about just how beautiful you are.

—

you’d finally woken up to yourself through the help of alessia, you’re absolutely gorgeous no matter what anyone says. it was a relief for everyone when you and alessia came to game day as loved up as ever.

as soon as alessia got out of the car, you latched onto her back, making the girl laugh brightly as she walked with you bumping into her every two seconds, attempting to keep your bodies close together.

“baby, i can’t walk” she laughs, “fine,” you huff, hopping onto her back, her hands instantly catch under your thighs as she smiles brightly when she feels you peck her cheek repeatedly as she walked you both into the emirates.

“lovebirds” leah teases, you wink at her and nod, making the older girl send you a playful grin as alessia continued to carry you into the change rooms.

you and alessia play exceptionally well, assisting her in a goal that had the crowd roaring. you bound over to her with a bright grin as she held her arms open to you, lifting you up triumphantly, feeling more proud about you rather than the goal.

⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆

you know the drill, just pretend it’s you!! ily tooney

liked by ellatoone and 44,232 others

alessia: the most perfect human being alive

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yourname: yeah, you

↳ alessia: we’ve been through this, little one

↳ yourname: oh please, you aren’t much taller

↳ leahwilliamsonn: oh, you’re so cute

↳ yourname: what the fuck

↳ alessia: so so so cute

#woso #woso community #woso fanfics #woso x reader #woso one shot #woso imagine #alessia russo #alessia russo x reader

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tubbytarchia · 4 months

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Actually I'm gonna need a little insanity thread for all the rancher things I love as I watch their POV for the first time. I'll publicize this when I'm done with ep5

TLDR: Heavens, it is a long list. I cannot tldr this

Them running around in circles, completely lost after their first deaths whilst also not expressing even the slightest bit of anger (esp Jimmy because you know)

Them expecting the other to know how to build but neither of them can

Tango building a box of a house and Jimmy being absolutely smitten by it continuously

Tango praising Jimmy with full genuinity for bringing back... a bucket of water

Them cradling one little chicken like its their offspring before they can get more

Jimmy standing behind the door, calling for Tango in order to surprise him with cows.... god help my heart

Tango declaring them as team ranchers to immediately admit he might not be a very good rancher. This is good and cute because I love to see them struggle yet have unbridled support towards each other

Jimmy being cornered by Joel and Etho so Tango leaves to save him (or so he says at least!)

Jimmy ushering Tango into their house as Tango yells for help due to his hunger and being chased by mobs, and then Jimmy giving him two melon slices because that's all he has (They are so pathetically poor which only accentuates the wholesome and cute factor)

Jimmy accidentally picking up Tango's baked potato and then handing it back to him so they can eat together while Tango basically foams out the mouth because he's so hungry

"Welcome home honey"

Them celebrating being able to feed themselves to any degree

Tango all "I built that wall, it's ugly, continuing the trend" only for Jimmy to immediately proclaim that he likes it

Jimmy catching on that Tango can be a great builder actually and confronting him about it like he's just been cheated on

Tango blocking their entrance to prevent more cows from leaving for Jimmy to then admit that he was the one that broke the door, oops

Tango watching Jimmy escort two goats from a distance "he's doing great"

Them in total confusion wasting way too much time trying to figure out how to get goat horns as they're huddled in their house with said goats strolling around (and them continuing to get butted casually as they go about their normal activities) before eventually choosing to waste much more time by trying to do the same thing outside

Unrelated but Pearl of all people being the first person to come to them with genuine help rather than to fuck with them like everyone else

In the face of all their struggles, the thing that seems to bring the absolute most joy to Tango and Jimmy by this point is obtaining a silly little goat horn

The fact that they both got the exact same goat horn!!!

"I need stuff for tools, and I need stuff for Jimmy"

Tango defending their base's looks despite proclaiming to be a bad builder, because god, I want him to be doing that just because of how much Jimmy praised it

Nobody replying to their goat horns, but THEM replying to each other!! (They also toot at each other later when frantically looking for each other agh!!)

This time Tango interrogating Jimmy as if he's been cheated on because Jimmy went into the deep dark without his approval

"The R survived"

"Tango snap out of it; Tango's having a moment" *Tango yelling and groaning and grunting and laughing continuously*

"Tango, Tango, let's think about this. Let's think about this!" "Hold me back" "Tango, listen to the horn" Jimmy calming his deranged husband aw

Tango burying his head in a corner refusing to look at his beautiful ranch in complete ruin even as Jimmy coaxes him

Jimmy and Tango kind of begrudgingly accepting Scar trying to be nice but Jimmy still valiantly defending the foot tower before it burned to the ground

Their son/daughter :( (Tango refers to the Warden as a she one episode and a he in another. Their child was an icon...)

Tango expressing that he's proud of Jimmy for having stayed alive so long and Jimmy replying "It's all down to to you. Hey, I wouldn't be here if it wasn't for you"

Maybe Jimmy really didn't have a water bucket on him but it was so funny of him to casually turn to Tango whilst on fire and go "can you put me out?"

Jimmy being comically kidnapped??? (Actually being put into gay baby jail instead) And asking Tango to help save him

"You're still here? It's over. Go home. Go." (insert a bunch of crying emojis)

Other stuff: I think by virtue of Jimmy being a real tall guy, his character is usually depicted as taller than Tango's if not significantly so. As such... Tango calling Jimmy "little man" tickles me greatly and sounds like a very fond pet name

Briefly brought it up earlier but goddd. I will absolutely hc that Tango only became proud and defendant of his work because of how much Jimmy liked what he built. And Jimmy always being there and calming Tango in his crazed outbursts <3 Tango is such a goddamn creature isn't he

And the uhh... Tango dying quickest out of anyone because of a creeper, to then express that he was proud of Jimmy for doing well even though he got them killed the first time around, and then Jimmy unceremoniously dying to an Enderman to end their series for good... As funny and poetic as it is, god, the canary curse fuckin hurts!! And yet there were hardly times that Tango showed disdain towards Jimmy, and then never genuinely. He knew their series could end quick with Jimmy as his soulmate and even when their positivity faltered, their support towards one another never did

For having read all this (or maybe just glancing and scrolling)... some unfinished rancher doodles just for you that I made while watching their POV

#team rancher #rancher duo #I am not okay #trafficshipping #blabber

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silliest-heartaches · 6 months

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Ohh my god DRINKKK!! Dude I love them sooo muchhh. I just love imagining them being head over heels for each other yet constantly denying their feelings, because of how they view themselves, yet still finding comfort and solace with each other. They are so. YES. PERFECT. AUGH.

SHARE MORE ABOUT THEM PLEASE!!!

And I love how you use they/them for Ink and she/her for Dream!!

GOD YEAH I LIKE THEM SO INCREDIBLY MUCH... tbh the main reason i started liking them was bc i was thinking abt them and how doomed yuri coded they were and. The worms Wormed in from there,,,,

I actually use he/they and she/they for ink and dream respectively but!!!!!! I love all hcs and interpretations of them for REAL. nonbinary people who are gay as fuck for real,, very inherrently queer ship regardless of how u see either of them i think...heart seeing them as t4t transmasc and transfem forever personally though so thats what i see em as hehe,, also in my head theyre both aroacespec (though the specifc kind varies from au to au though i do consistently see ink as ace and dream as demiaro :>>)

Im not sure how long these will be so...hcs under the cut lol

- okay well while in my mind while error is technically the First Entity ink sees that isnt just a normal entity, dream is like their First. Friend. you know. Like when error first saw him he was screaming and crying for the hills bc it was also his first time seeing another outcode so. that reaction BUT with dream she was more filled with gentle confusion... this is a bit after she unstoned in the apple incident but still was new to au hopping and naive to most danger so they became friends!!! Questionably so.

-to elaborate, when they first meet dream is still stuck on the ideals of toxic positivity and pushing through hardship no matter what... i think this is something they eventually grow out of and dream will eventually learn to see the need for balance eventually but one of their first disputes happens when ink is running low on ink and most of whats left are the Negative Emotions within him alongside the especially strong panic that he usually feels when they get like this... dream would try to comfort him and try to say that itll work out in the end no matter what and that they just need to push through and that itll be okay like normal comforting words because dream is an empath and can sense feelings right,,i feel like its comforting in some cases but when things get Really Bad and especially when the main reserves of feelings that ink has are Negative, they heavily override his normal sense of self and i imagine they get a lot more. Snappy.... theres also the additional hc thingy of ink also really overexaggerating his feelings and overplaying them a lot for the sake of trying to feel more intensely (doesnt work, just drains him faster and will never truly feel natural to him...personally think that ink feels a lot of disconnect from his feelings) which could be considerably offputting to dream (though before adding swap to the group she thought it wass normal because she had only seen the fake pretend nice joy of the village influenced by her aura and not Genuine Feelings)

I think eventually through the years they would learn a lot from eachother...like with ink learning to be more naturally charismatic and dream learning to see past toxic positivity and have his perception on emotions change for the better (ie in learning that having different emotions are okay, so long as there is a balance)

id do alot more hcs but tbh what it boils down to is: toxic codependent yuri. intensely up and down relationship where theres an insane amount of love and attachment but also a lack of self from the both of them because they are only able to see themselves as a Thing to the other. Also exes who turned out to be besties. Thry got together and broke up wayyy before blue (they casually tell him stories about it and for the parts that he does know about he is horrified for.) Oh and they share hobbies and do parallel play alot. dream is more music oriented and can play the cello and flute. ink can play the ukelele but hes more familiar with drawing and painting duh. Also they have a garden. they love growing flowers but their favourites are sunflowers. Also have writing sessions together. Also may/may not also have beautiful princess disorder. (The both of them)

im so sorry this is so incoherrent but erm. yeah im very normal abt them (half of this stuff comes from oc projection the other half is like. Mental illness while in the shower tbh)

#feysanity #drink ship #dream x ink #ink sans #dream sans #undertale #utmv #undertale fanart #headcanons #nonnies :>#fumbles :>

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isa-ghost · 24 days

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qPhil & Other Egg Headcanons

Happy birthday original eggos 😭💚🎉

Note: Although I made these bc the og eggs are birth today, I've done at least one hc for each egg! They're a bit limited bc they're based off what I've seen through 3 POVs + osmosis through liveblog, but I included them all nonetheless. :D

qPhil headcanons masterlist

He thinks Leo has so much fucking swag. How does a literal egg look so fucking cool like at all times. How does she do it.

Secretly admires the shit out of Dapper. He's fucking brilliant. Hilariously unhinged. Insanely devoted to his collection habits. Adorably takes after Bad in looks and silliness. He's just such a badass little guy.

Pomme his fucking beloved. Brilliant just like her siblings, insanely perceptive, tough as nails yet still soft as flower pedals. He sees huge survivalist potential in her. He wishes she could shed some of the stress she's always seems to be under. He relates to her a bit too much sometimes. He hopes that poor girl gets a break.

He's absolutely gutted he didn't get to know Trump like at all. He saw little to nothing of him. He hopes he's at peace with Maxo.

GOD he wish he got more time with Flippa. She took him out like it was nothing. He would've loved training her alongside her parents. He bets she would've been an awesome pvper one day.

He wishes he could've seen more of Tilin. He more familiar with her than he was Trump but still not enough.

Richarlyson makes it so hard not to pick "favorite eggs" besides his own. Richas is always on some wild ass shit, Phil fucking loves it. That kid's just high on life at like all times. Unreasonably funny on top of it all. God does Phil worry about him though, he's gotten way too into risking his life for the lulz.

Ramon practically feels like a third child to him (sometimes). Much like Dapper, he loves how brilliant he is and how cracked at his craft he is.

Bobby's death absolutely devastated him. He loved that little shit. And he loved how happy he made Roier and Jaiden. Seeing how severely his death broke them made his heart ache. He had nightmares about going through the same thing.

He's DETERMINED to get to know Chunsik further. Timezones are a bitch though. :( But he will be damned if something happens before he can get more familiar.

Empanada is unreasonably cute to him, and he loves seeing her take more and more after Bagi every time he sees her once more. He absolutely loves how close she and all her moms are. He genuinely fears the Pancake Mafia tbh, and he's convinced Empanada is the head.

He adores Sunny. She knows what she wants. They're not afraid to speak their mind as long as they're comfortable. She's silly and playful and sweet. Yet they still have this small, but palpable cool edge to them. Truly one spunky little girl. 😎

Phil is like 90% sure Pepito is just always going thru it, but has a sneaking suspicion that's just how Pepito seems at first glance, and maybe thats just what Pepito WANTS people to think. Either way, Pepito is just such a Creacher and Phil loves it. An absolutely loveable little guy.

He on/off considers commissioning Ramon or Dapper to make bombs to go fuck up a Fed building. He'd let them join him tbh.

He's so insanely afraid of accidentally hurting the eggs, but he'd love to spar with them and teach them more pvp skills so they'd be even better at defending themselves. He's only comfortable doing so with his own eggs.

God, he wants more times where ALL the eggs are together. He loves watching them interact, he loves their dynamics with each other and the chaos that unfolds when they're all in one place.

Phil: I don't want to build things bc technically that's doing the Feds a favor by making the island cooler. So fuck them. // Also Phil: *would build an entire city for these goddamn eggs if it meant they were safe and happy*

#qsmp #qsmp philza #philza #q!philza #qphil headcanons #qsmp leonarda #qsmp dapper #qsmp pomme #qsmp richarlyson #qsmp chunsik #qsmp sunny #qsmp empanada #qsmp pepito #qsmp ramon #qsmp bobby #qsmp tilin #qsmp juanaflippa #qsmp trump

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poursomesunaonme · 2 years

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you drive suna rintarou absolutely insane.

he’s never had a stable partner, never really been interested in anyone in that manner, before he meets you. it isn’t like he resisted something of the sort time and time again, he just never felt a genuine attraction to anyone.

the day he meets you, it’s as if the sun broke through a thousand years worth of clouds. he’s completely enamored with you from the very beginning. it’s impossible to ignore the earth shattering magnetism that drew him to you.

the feeling throws him completely off his guard at first - how his heart skips a beat in his chest and how his mouth dries out immediately. how strange it is to feel so nervous but to also be carried by feet he can’t control directly to you to ask you for your number.

it isn’t long before the two of you fall head over heels - or rather, you catch up to suna’s level of affection. you start seeing each other regularly before you can even blink.

suna finds the needs to touch you at all times so peculiar. again, he’s never felt that a day in his life. but he can’t keep his lips off the back of your hand (“like a stuck up prince or something,” he always thinks) or your eyelids or every inch of your body for that matter. he always hates watching people all over each other in public but he just can’t. keep. his hands off you.

you must have put some kind of spell on him. he simply couldn’t for no reason be so infatuated with the way you move, or the way you smell, how the way your nose crinkles when he pokes it with his tongue when he pulls back from shoving it down your throat, or your guffaws when you’re on top of him and he wraps his arms around you and digs his fingers into your sides to trap you in a tickle.

still, no matter what, he’ll always be dumbfounded by the fact that he’ll get you the biggest, most obnoxious stuffed animal even though he’ll look like an idiot walking down the street with a giant stuffie, but he knows you’ll adore it.

it feels so trivial, but his heart skipped a beat when he finally told you that he was a pro volleyball player and you said that you were going to make every single match possible. but even so, he can still play past crippling exhaustion, spurred by your cheers.

it’s easy for him to analyze a game, analyze the players’ moves and habits, yet he can’t quite analyze you. you’re like a puzzle hes always wanted to figure out as much as you say youre an open book. maybe he’s just always wondered why him.

it’s not anything deprecating. he just never found anything else intriguing besides you, so what was it about himself? he was never sure, yet you say it’s absolutely everything (with a brilliant smile and a sweet, deepening kiss). he can’t really describe his feelings as anything but the same, so maybe it’s meant to be, after all.

of course, there’s no one that will know the answer as to why he feels this way like kita does. his friend’s eyes nearly bulge out of his face when he hears the adoration in suna’s voice, how some person finally managed to make him pull his head out of his ass whether he knew it or not. the main reason suna chose kita was because he knew his old captain would tell the truth. and tell the truth he did.

“you’re in love with them, that’s why.”

and somehow, some way, suna was perfectly content with that. deep down, he already knew. that’s exactly why he was driving to your place the very next minute, absolutely dying to tell you. with a sly smile and a full heart, the elusive suna rintarou gives his heart only to you.

@fittsythesnail come n get it >:)

#🪐beanie writes!#suna rintarou #suna x you #suna fluff #suna x reader

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mins-fins · 2 months

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dal segno.

&&. you're in a car with a beautiful boy, but he's unfortunately not yours anymore.

pairing: xiao dejun x m!reader

genre: angst

warnings: implied sexual content, kind of toxic relationship, they are both so incredibly pathetic

word count: 1.2k

notes: hello this is a voiceless isa reporting, i am suffering with the most horrible sickness to ever be bestowed upon me (the common cold) and i was originally supposed to post this yesterday but i fell asleep in the middle of my writing process so yeah 👍 also i have a class in like an hour so i just wanna publish this now and be done with it 😿

you're asleep for a while.

sleeping in a car has never truly been your thing, ever since you were a kid, you could never ever fall asleep in a car even after how tired you were. the fact that you were able to doze off, even with the clear tiredness you exhibited, was odd.

you wonder what kind of change was in the air caused for you to finally doze off in the car..

when you wake up, it is not morning, which you honestly expect because you had only fallen asleep for a few minutes, you can tell because guanheng is still inside, chatting up with his friends or whatever.

if guanheng is still inside, that means the one person you do not want to see right now is still right beside you in the drivers seat.

dejun doesn't seem to register that you're now awake, his eyes closed as he rubs his temples, clearly stressed about something. it isn't until you shuffle in your seat, rubbing your eyes that he finally seems to acknowledge your presence, almost startled by how quiet you'd been.

"holy shit you scared me".

he places a hand on his chest, and you can tell he was genuinely surprised by your sudden awakening because he glances at you then glances away, very interested in the window it seems.

"sorry" you whisper. you feel as if you could cut the air in the car with a knife considering how thick it seems. "hi".

why do you say hi? why do you choose to greet him? you two know each other, you know each other very well, much more than you ever thought you'd know each other.

dejun also registers the awkwardness in the air, the two of you itch to escape the situation, but you both also don't want to be the first to leave. he gives a polite smile, finally staring directly at you. "hi" he greets back.

you have the urge to itch your hand, feeling insanely uncomfortable. a small sigh escapes your lips, and you make an effort to look down at the floor of the car instead. "heng still in there?"

dejun is clearly upset at how you changed the topic, but what else were you two supposed to do? greet each other a couple more times? it's all basically come to shit now. "yeah.. he practically knows everybody in that household, it's crazy".

he talks like he doesn't care much, you chalk it up to him being tired, forced to drive home his friend who has a million acquaintances, not to mention he's sitting right beside his ex boyfriend, the same ex boyfriend whose heart he broke in the same car no more than a few weeks ago.

he did it in an almost heartless way as well, he seemed to have no regard for you, the tears streaming down your cheeks must've seemed pathetic to him, the way you tried to get him to change his mind must've completely altered his opinion on you by then.

it's understandable why the two of you are so awkward, why there are no jokes between you, why instead of feeling grateful to be sitting beside such a pretty boy, your stomach curls in an uncomfortable way.

you glance over at him for a moment, watching as he picks his nails, even with the heartbreak he put you through, you can't deny how absolutely striking he is. dejun possesses a kind of beauty you don't think another person could ever display as well as he does.

you hate that he's so beautiful, a literal work of art, but was still the very one responsible for the days you spent feeling as if you weren't enough. he didn't even try to give you a good explanation for breaking off your seemingly bulletproof relationship, just said some bullshit like "we weren't working together y/n".

and yeah, your mad, you have every right to be mad.

it was never supposed to be more than a friday night hookup, nothing more than a stupid meetup orchestrated by a mutual friend of yours, you two should've never crossed over into having an actual relationship, because your demise was very expected.

"i don't know what you want from me".

"i don't want anything from you.." anymore, is what you want to add, but in fear of sounding even more pathetic than you look, you shut your mouth, crossing your arms. "there's nothing more to say, we're over and that's fine, i've gotten over it".

"y/n—"

"dejun" you don't want to hear him speak any more, because the longer he does the more you'll want to break down and cry. "you made your choice and i respect it, i don't want anything from you".

dejun looks hurt by your words, as if he's not the one who decided to break up with you. he's such an idiot, a beautiful, pathetic idiot. he slumps in his seat, as if you just delivered a punch straight to his gut.

you stop looking at him at this point, because you aren't going to be able to resist the urge to kiss him if you continue staring at his face. another wave of silence spreads between you two, and you want to leave so bad, but you can't, because then you'd have to deal with guanheng's fucking interrogations.

you hear dejun unbuckling his seatbelt beside you, at least he's leaving, it'll make everything just a little more bearable. you clear your throat, pretending the prior conversation didn't happen. "could you tell guanheng to make sure he gets back my copy of dracula from yangyang?"

dejun hums, but sighs. "y/n".

you wish you listened to your heart, but your mind was screaming at you to fucking look at him!

so you did, and you almost collapse right onto the floor. he's staring at you with such bewitched, lovestruck eyes, it's as if nothing bad ever happened between you two, as if you were still happy and in love with no issues whatsoever.

"stop doubting yourself.." he whispers, then he presses his lips to yours, it's as impulsive as it is stupid, because dejun is going to regret this the next day, you know he will.

you hate that you kiss him back, you hate how even though he broke your heart in this very place and left you crying in your bed. you should be ashamed of how easily you fall into his hands, you're constantly thinking optimistically, as if he won't just up and abandon you again.

when he separates from you, you almost want to pull him back, your hand fiddling with his shirt collar.

but for once, you listen to your head.

"i love you" he gives a sad smile, letting go of you and exiting the car.

you just sit there, face warm as you try to register what just happened. you watch dejun walk away, as you've done thousands of times before, you still don't feel any better, but the uncomfortable curl in your stomach has subsided for now.

if you just pretend that everything is all going to he okay, maybe it will!

oh xiao dejun, always breaking your heart and leaving you to pick up the pieces afterward.

#xiao dejun #xiaojun #wayv #nct #nct imagines #nct drabbles #nct scenarios #wayv imagines #wayv scenarios #wayv drabbles #nct x reader #nct x male reader #wayv x reader #wayv x male reader #xiaojun imagines #xiaojun x reader #xiaojun x male reader #𑁍 ࣪˖ 𓂃 isa's works!

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athousandbyeol · 8 months

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discussion #9 (only friends): top's vulnerability and mew's kindness; breaking each other's walls [episode 2 recap]

again, topmew are driving me insane. it's only the second episode but there are so many nuances of pain slowly resurfacing as top and mew begin to meddle. it's heartbreaking, to say the least, how they've/will trigger/ed the best and worst in each other as their relationship progresses.

beforehand, i want to apologise because my thoughts are never coherent, and this post won't clarify anything that's going on between topmew. i find it difficult to pen my ideas down these days because topmew are written with so much precision, care and keenness, i don't think there's much unfolding that needs to be done. but i do want to talk about this one particular scene in episode 2 that broke my heart.

(this will be a short post so hehe)

as always, please take my discussion posts with a grain of salt :)

let's start.

top's vulnerability; an unexpected 'shedding' of top's confident facade

episode 2 is a mixture of many things. i like how we're seeing more of top, not just his confident and prideful nature, but more of his truest self; the core he tries to hide from everyone.

it's interesting how in every moment of top's vulnerability, mew is the person who witnesses it: 1) when top was subtly angry that mew turned down his offer of sex (the ice cream offer), 2) when mew almost caught top and boston in the shower cubicle (?), and 3) when top was about to take his sleeping pills.

as i mentioned in my previous post, top and mew are tempting each other into this 'losing' game just to see who's going to win and who's going to suffer the pain. however, i also see this 'hunter-hunter' relationship as the beginning of top and mew finding/regaining their truest identity. again, as i discussed before, their encounter would bring out the best and worst in them, and i believe meeting mew will change top for the better but meeting top will awaken the worst side of mew.

i think many people out there are more coherent than me when it comes to explaining the dynamic between top and mew, so i'll just make this very simple.

mew's kindness and attentiveness touch top's heart

after that cute (and sensual) cookie scene, top asked if he could sleep over at mew's house. again, i don't see any malice in this. i believe top is genuinely tired and he was just lazy to drive home. but, i also believe it's because top likes the warmth mew gave when they slept on the same bed before. top has tasted that before— so he wanted to have a morsel of it again. top believed they could revive that non-sexual connection tonight— but as mew said this was a reset and nothing like that had ever happened— top couldn't sleep together with mew on the same bed. bummer.

so, top agreed to sleep on the sofa instead. but he couldn't sleep. he was tossing and turning. he was visibly tired, though. so why he couldn't sleep?

he then decided to reach for something in his pocket—

—sleeping pills.

God. the way i gasped when i saw this. top is an insomniac. he can't sleep alone due to his trauma. (i made this assumption before and it broke my heart when it came to life...)

i like how top's comfort was mew's only concern at that point. he knew the sofa was uncomfortable, and he was particularly the one who insisted top to sleep on it. so the guilt mew felt was genuine to me— he felt bad for putting top in that situation.

and it's so amazing how 'loud' top's eyes were.

i see that scared and traumatised kid in those eyes; the fear that stayed with him for God knows how long resurfaced as mew 'caught' him red-handed, wanting to cave into the safety of those pills just to tame his suffocating notions down.

even so, top still tried to assure mew that he was okay. it was just another petty problem of his. it wasn't supposed to be mew's concern.

it was just top not wanting mew to see this weak side of his. because top has always flaunted himself as the confident and 'top of the top' amongst his friends/peers, so how could he break apart in front of mew— the person top was trying to woo? of course, he won't.

but this is why humans are humans, at the end of the day. no matter how hard we try to be everything that we wish to be, there's always going to be something that rips us apart. we aren't bulletproof. it's okay to be vulnerable. it's okay to be weak.

i bet no one has ever said these things to top; thus, the start of his flamboyant/confident persona is his (messed-up) understanding that he can't show his weaknesses in front of anyone, even to himself.

yet, mew approached him with gentleness. even though mew questioned the legitimacy of top's story (which, i did too), still, mew wasn't the one to jump to a conclusion that quickly. i think it's also heartwarming how mew was willing to listen. it's one of the things top didn't know he wanted and needed— someone that was willing to listen to the noises in his head.

side note: i would like to add how different top and boston are despite boston saying they're the same. in episode 2, nick was talking about his passion for animation. he was visibly happy sharing about his interest since boston asked him. i guess, nick perceived this as boston taking an interest on other things about nick that wasn't just about the sex. however, boston wasn't paying attention as he was busy developing the picture he took of nick. the convo ended just like that. this showed nothing mattered to boston; whatever nick likes or dislikes outside of sex doesn't matter to boston.

this is different from top because he did listen to every word mew said (the ice cream convo). so, although yes, top and boston do share some attributes, top is entirely a different person compared to boston. this is why top was so angry when boston said they're the same. top knew too well they aren't.

this act of kindness touched top's heart. i don't think top understood the severity of mew's actions toward him (yet), but this would be one of the reasons why top (will possibly) //sincerely// likes mew in the future.

i honestly have the same response as mew. i legit asked if this is true because really, everything top said in these two episodes, i don't believe him at all. but the glint in top's eyes indicates a different story that was waiting to be read, and who's going to read it well? mew. why? because mew likes to read. he wants to read top. mew wants to know top beyond everything he heard from everyone else. mew wants to understand top through and through (perhaps for his own benefit?).

it's safe to say that top was slightly hurt by mew's words, but it was also something top would've expected. he never told this to anyone/boston since he is top by the way— the best of the best. who would ever believe this confident jock is battling a (petty) fight of his own?

it's a given— this confident facade comes with the price of having no weaknesses— and top knew he couldn't expect much empathy or understanding from mew or anyone. i bet he was a bit confused too; why did i tell mew this? but i guess it has to do with top feeling at ease with mew. he believed mew was giving him options to share at his own pace, never once forcing top to say anything without his will.

mew was doubtful, and i think it's very valid. this also kind of verifies the idea that mew hasn't totally believed in everything top said/did to him, hence the 'reset' agenda mew introduced in their 'relationship'. mew knew all along of top's game, but this was mew confronting top head-on, with sincerity, because top was vulnerable. top was honest for the first time, at least to himself. and what would top get if he lied about his trauma to mew? honestly, i assume, nothing. nothing but mew's trust and love for top— which is everything that top wants from mew in the future.

and mew apologises. that's wonderful. i think that really sparked something in top's heart.

i still have doubts about top and will continue to doubt him until he proves me wrong, but i think he's telling the truth in this scene. why?

this is the first time top outwardly showed his vulnerable side to us; the audience. we've never seen it happen without some kind of obscurity; it's always from mew's perspective that we see the walls top built slowly starting to crack. but at this moment, it's just top, mew and us. he has nowhere to hide, and no one is judging him. mew isn't judging him. and we aren't too. who would judge anyone who's just sharing their problems? i don't think it's fair to do so.

additionally, i think it's another smart directing. p'jojo and p'ninew introduced this scene to us early on so that we know why top ended up doing whatever he will do in the future— it provides an exhibition(s) once topmew's relationship is put into 'trial'. at least, we know that top isn't entirely bad; he's just someone who resorted to sex because he can't sleep. however, that doesn't justify infidelity/dishonesty in any form of relationship.

and it's also interesting how we know mew (and the other characters) are being interviewed in the blue room, which means they (and us, the person behind the camera) are involved in their story too. this is why i said we're more so included in their journey in this series. also, the characters will turn to us to seek validation/answers/confirmation on what they should/will do in the future. i think that's why this scene feels sincere and heart-wrenching because we are present at the moment— we are there to witness top showing a part of himself that he despises; his sleeping problems, not only to mew but the audience.

i like this scene a lot because we get to see mew being the way we all perceive him to be initially; kind, understanding and helpful. these are the traits that bound ray around mew still, and this also will be the reason for top's deep infatuation for mew in the future.

furthermore, when mew offered to sleep next to top, i really see that as an act of kindness. this moment brought out the best side of mew, the gentle and attentive side of him that everyone loves him for (ray especially). so it was a liberating moment for top to have a taste of mew again— not sexually— but this intimacy that transcends the 'comfort' sex can give to top.

at this point, what i can deduce is sex has always been top's 'sleeping pill'. he can spend the whole night fucking someone so that he won't have to close his eyes and surrender to the trauma of 'dying alone'. i guess a part of top is just afraid of being lonely— of not being wanted. that's why he created this confident persona. it's the only way to make people 'desire' him. it's the only way to be valid and wanted by anyone.

but hugging mew— having someone on the bed and not doing anything but cuddling— provides top with the warmth and security he has always wanted and needed. as i said, this will be the main reason why top will hold onto mew— why he likes mew so much— why he's the one crying as mew confronted him of his past 'sins'.

but still, it breaks my heart how top insists that he's fine and he doesn't want mew to worry about him (or see/belittle his flaws to his face). it would hurt top's pride if mew did that. but we all know mew wouldn't. if a person is kind to him— if they respect mew, mew will respect them too.

in fact, mew offered a helping hand—

—in which top quickly agreed.

it's so... sad. it's sad how mew is the one who wanted to know top better; mew is the one who wanted to help top to sleep better; mew is the one who brings out the best in top.

but it's also sad how this won't be easy for top because boston is still around; his sexual needs aren't yet fulfilled; his ego is constantly challenged by mew and boston; top resorting to boston as boston has always been the easiest 'way out' to make top feel in control again. top is so afraid of losing control of himself and his surroundings that he knows— fucking and having boston in his life will always provide him with a sense of power and stability.

and that's just heart-shattering to me.

side note: i guess, when top and boston have sex in the car next week, it might be because of top's frustration. he feels like a loser because mew is constantly toppling his ego and top just can't take that from mew. he feels so powerless and challenged by mew's firmness. why? because mew is his weakness. and top is slowly realising whatever mew said to him during the laser tag game was true. perhaps, top was in a state of denial; he was trying to discredit his feelings for mew, not wanting to believe it is not more than ' i think i like you' but merely 'i just want to fuck you'. this will fuck top up so badly and thus— boston is there at his service. boston will say that he's right all along and mew isn't interested in top and he's already losing in this game. so top takes boston in because, with boston, he'll always win. //this breaks my heart...

damn. i'm just... shattered... at this point. this checklist thing is driving me to the edge. goodness. mew. top. you guys are killing me.

how topmew's relationship will play out; a prediction

i would like to share my assumption on how the first half of topmew's relationship will unfold (episodes 3 to 6).

in episode 3, i think it'll be the start of mew discovering top and boston's secret relationship (the car sex will be crucial evidence in the future).

since p'book said episode 4 will be spicy, i have a feeling their first time will be in episodes 4/5 as mew might 'change' his strategy now by allowing top to have 'his way' with mew.

then, episode 5 will be topmew's 'honeymoon' phase when they're finally coming to terms with their feelings. the shower scene we see in the trailer might be in episodes 4-5 too since top said, "before, when i had sex with someone else, my only concern was if i orgasmed. but with mew, i want to make you as happy as possible." i guess this line is spoken before they have sex (to make mew believe that mew is always going to be top's priority). but it can also be after they had sex too.

i read a tweet that said forcebook love episode 6 the most. p'force said it is the climax so i'm guessing it's when the confrontation scene will take place. mew might've saw something relating to topboston's relationship (the photobooth picture that nick has? i think nick might show it to mew just because nick wants boston to stop meeting top), so he lashes out at top right there and then, perhaps no longer believing in anything top tries to justify.

and i think after episode 6 ends, it'll be the start of the intense drama, not only between topmew but other pairs as well. also, this marks the beginning of mew's transformation.

but again, these are just assumptions that i made. hehe

conclusion

it's fascinating to see how top sheds the confident side of him— the most important aspect of his personality— to mew, the person top wanted to win over. i like this vulnerability top showed to mew. it kind of solidifies the idea that top will cave into mew more and more in the future, and that dependency will turn into deep love— i want to believe top will love mew so much that he can't live without mew anymore. cue those heartbreaks because i'm so excited to see top breaking apart.

i honestly think i can no longer write a coherent and good topmew discussion post because they're just confusing and baffling me in every episode. however, if i ever want to highlight some important parts i see in an episode, i will try my best to pen them down. i apologise for this thought vomit :(

[1 | 2 | 3 | 4 (i) | 4 (ii) | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12]

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mafiatsunafish · 11 months

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the first time Hangman heard the older man play the piano, and his famous song in extend, was on their first night out when they were still in the academy. he witnessed the move that had become Rooster's trademark for many years to come while he was enjoying his beer by himself (because he was an asshole, no one wanted to deal with him and Coyote had abandoned him for his date of the night)

he and Rooster, long story short, either wanted to kiss or strangle each other or anything in between. it was stupid.

the other pilot unplugged the jukebox right when the bar was at its highest, people were not amused by this to say at least. he then walked to the piano at the corner of the bar and played it.

You shake my nerves and you rattle my brain Too much love drives a man insane You broke my will But what a thrill Goodness gracious, great balls of fire!

not just played, Rooster sang the damn song, and he sang it well. the music made the crowd turn on again and Hangman was genuinely surprised when he saw how many people seemed to know this song. don't get him wrong, he loves this song but Great Ball of Fire wasn't something guys and galls his age would have known and banged their heads along.

The song belongs to his parents' generations, to bars in the 80s, to the stories he grew up with about how his Pa had wooed his Ma by playing his heart out on the piano when they first met. so naturally Hangman had always associated it with memories at the back of his head, with his parent's love story and something he often dreamed of, his turn to meet the love of his life.

Hangman then found himself singing along with the whole bar and locked his eyes with the singer.

this is NOT how he wanted his dream to manifest

Kiss me, baby Mmmmh, it feels good

Rooster fucking winked at him and blew him a motherfucking kiss.

and he fucking blushed, sued him, the man flirted with him while looking like a mouth-watering piece of cake, Hangman had eyes.

however, at the same time, Rooster could not have anything for him. Right?

Hangman's mind went straight up nope, NOPE, NoPe. then he walked calmly run out of the bar, to the parking lot and buried his reddened face into his hand.

"I blame you guys for this."

He thought of his parents.

(so, yeah, the previous hc had led me to this. i genuinely don't know if I could think of the rest, but there will be more, I just don't know WHEN)

(you have the opening and the ending, but you have absolutely no thought of the middle)

#hangster #mamas knows best #top gun #top gun maverick #idiots in love #jake hangman seresin #bradley rooster bradshaw #rooster x hangman #fishy.hc #top gun maverick headcanons #great ball of fire as a metaphor for love confession #Grammarly is my wingman

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rand0mfangurlstuff · 13 days

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Sing Yourself to Sleep - Bucky x Y/N - Part Five - You Right

Thank you so much to everyone who is enjoying this series so far. I'm really enjoying combining my love for writing with my love for music.

I want to preface this by saying I do not condone cheating in any form. This is purely for entertainment. Cheating is always wrong especially when the person doing the cheating is married to a genuinely nice person. Obviously, nothing in my story is based on the real life people and I have no idea what Colonel Clarke was like in real life. In my story however, he is a nice guy and a good husband, a bit stuffy and boring maybe, but he is a nice guy. He doesnt deserve to be cheated on. But the heart wants what it wants and Y/N wants Bucky!

Anyway, this part is a little steamy, theres a lot of kissing, heavy petting and other things. Based somewhat on You Right by The Weeknd and Doja Cat. Previous Part Here

They were moths to each other's ever growing flames. They couldn't get enough of each other. Like addicts begging for even the smallest hit, they begged for eachothers touch in even the smallest of ways. Their shoulders would brush as they would pass by each other in even the widest of hallways. Fingers touching longer than necessary when one would pass something to the other.

The only time they could openly touch each other was when they were dancing at the officers club. Colonel Clarke was delighted to have Bucky dance with his wife, leaving him to smoke cigars with some of the older officers. But inbetween dances she would still glance back to the Colonel, checking on him like a good wife. It drove Bucky insane. He wished the Colonel would go to his quarters and leave him and Y/N alone. He knew it was wrong, she was someone elses girl. But he knew she should be his girl. Their chemistry was too strong to deny.

Y/N felt awful. Everytime she looked at her husband she felt guilty and sad. She knew he didnt deserve this betrayal. She tried to break it off with Bucky serveral times but each time he just had to look at her with those eyes and she melted. He was far too good at knowing what to say and do to get her thoughts of ending things to vanish. Such is what happened last week after the party at the officers club.

They were the last to leave the club, having to be forced out by the staff. Bucky had his arm around her waist. She was headed in the direction of her quarters, when he pulled her round to the side of the building. Suddenly his lips were on hers. 'I've wanted to do that all night.' he said as he broke the kiss, forehead against hers. 'Bucky someone could see us!' she looked around rappidly. 'Everyones gone to bed doll. It's just you and me.' He kissed her again, she kissed him back. It quickly deepend into an intense, hungry kiss. Like all their kisses did. His hand moved to her breast, the other to her rear. He pulled her closer to him and she could feel how turned on he was. He moved to kiss her neck and she let out a moan. 'Oh Bucky, we have to stop.' she half moaned. He mouth said no, but the way she was grinding herself against his thigh said otherwise. 'I can't help it, I want you.' 'But.. Bert- Albert might be waiting for me.'

Bucky stopped cold. The last thing he wanted was to be reminded of her husband. He felt bad, he really did. But he couldn't help how he felt about her. And yes, he did have real feelings for her. It wasn't just physical, though he was yet to tell her that. 'Your gonna be the death of me.' he said into her neck. 'I'm sorry, I'm worried if I'm not back soon he might come looking. We really need to stop this. It's not right.' Bucky lifted his head to look at her, he caressed her cheek. 'I know doll, I don't feel great about it either. But it's also not right to deny ourselves happiness in times like these. There's a war you know.' he said with a smirk. She was powerless to the smile that spread across her face. 'Stop talking nonsense and kiss me.' she said.

Every day he found a reason to for them to be alone together. Yesterday he had used the excuse of helping her 'taste test' a cake for one of the mens birthdays to get her alone in the kitchen. He tasted more than just cake.

She was sitting on the edge of the counter. Her thighs either side of Bucky's head. He licked at her folds in the most sensual way. One hand wrapped around her thigh while the other played with her most sensitive area. She was gasping for air, her pleasure taking over her. She was close. She bit on her hand to stiffle her screams of pleasure as his tongue went deeper inside her. When she came, she came hard. Like a damn breaking and an river crashing through her. She fell back to lie on the counter top. When Bucky was satisfied that he had truly worn her out, he moved up her body to kiss her, she could taste herself on his lips. 'That was...wow.' she said, still trying to catch her breath. 'You are wow.' he said as he kissed the top of her breasts peeking out from her blouse. It was then that they heard the door of the main building opening. They both jumped away from each other, Y/N fixing her hair and fixing her clothes. Bucky readjusted his trousers in an attempt to hid his buldge.

Charlie, one of the cooks, walked through the door. 'Oh hello Y/N, Major Egan. How are you both today?' He said while putting on his apron. Y/N hoped her blush wasnt as bad as it felt. Before she could answer, Bucky stepped in. 'Hey Charlie boy! Settle a depate for us, which is better? Plain vanilla or rich chocolate?' Bucky gave a sly wink to Y/N, letting her know they he was not just talking about frosting. 'Uh, I like anything really, but chocolates nice.' Bucky patted him on the shoulder 'See Charlie knows that chocolate will always win.' With that he dipped his finger into the frosting and put on a big show of seductively licking it off. With that he gave her another wink and walked out the door.

Now she found herself in a supply closet, standing on one leg with her other wrapped around Bucky's waist as he trust inside her. It wasn't the most romantic situation, but neither one of them could say they were trying to make love to one another. This was sex. She would have preferred sex in a bed, less chance of bumping into things or getting a cramp in her leg. But this was all they could do, a few stolen moments in a closet. Bucky's thrusts became erratic, he was close. He kissed and nipped at her neck just below her ear, and his hand reached down to where they were joined. 'Come with me baby.' he whispered in her ear. A few more strokes and some rubbing of her sensitive nerves and she was falling over the edge with him. She felt him come inside her, her walls twitching around him. Both breathless, foreheads touching, the dim light of the small room made it hard for them to see each other. But she could feel the smile on his face as he kissed her. 'I love it when you do that.' He said between soft kisses. 'Do what?' 'Let yourself go. Let yourself go over the edge with me.' She smiled, a teasing tone to her voice, 'You don't live me much of a choice, hard not to let go when you touch me like that. I never-' she stopped herself. Knowing she should not say what she was about to say. 'Never what?' 'Nothing.' she said, hoping to distract him with more kissing. He knew what she was thinking though. 'He doesn't make you come like I do?' he said smirking. He loved the fact that he could make her feel things her husband couldnt. 'A woman like you should be made to feel that good every day, several times a day.' He started kissing the sensitive spot behind her ear again. It wasn't that Albert wasnt good in bed, it was nice. It didn't happen as often these days, but when it did it was nice. It just wasnt as good as sex with Bucky. She realised they had been in this closet for far too long, and anyone could see. 'We need to get out of here. I'll go, wait ten minutes and then leave. We can't ben seen coming out of a closet together.' 'Only if a get another kiss.' She took his face in her hands and kissed him with all her might, knocking the air out of him. 'There you go. Remember, wait ten minutes.'

Y/N left, making sure to put as much distance between her and the closet as fast as possible. Bucky checked his watch and exactly eleven minutes later we walked out of the closet. Where Gale 'Buck' Cleven stood waiting for him. His sudden appearance made Bucky jump. 'Jesus! Buck you trying to give me a heart attack?' 'No, but you clearly have a death wish.' Buck replied.

#masters of the air #callum turner #john bucky egan #john egan #mota #john egan x reader #masters of the air fan fiction #masters of the air fanfic

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nancys4gf · 2 years

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hating you is easier | jonathan byers

summary: you and jonathan work together to expose the lab. even though you hate each other.

pairing: jonathan byers x gender neutral reader

warnings: none

note: today i offer you.... friends to strangers to enemies to lovers jonathan.. + our favorite matchmaker: murray. i had so much fun writing this. i hope you enjoy!!! <3 ps. that gif??? i'm so in love with him.

̟ ̇.˚︵‿୨♡୧‿︵˚.✩

“you can’t drive.”

“i haven’t drank that much.”

“i’m not getting in that car.”

“well, i’m not letting you drive.”

“do what you want.” you concluded. “i’ll stay here.”

jonathan let out a sigh. he knew he couldn’t leave you here on your own, no matter how much you irritated him.

he turned to murray, who was curiously watching the scene, and said,

“we’ll stay.”

“okay, i’m confused.” he spoke. “what’s going on here? a lovers’ quarrel?”

“please,” you choked back a laugh. “no, no love going on here.”

murray raised an eyebrow. “how come?”

“we don’t…” jonathan started, casting a glance at you. “really get along.”

“ha!” murray exclaimed, startling both of you. “yet you’re here together because…?”

“we have shared interests.” you replied.

“shared interests, alright,” he nodded, smirking. “correct me if i’m wrong but, you were the one who went to jonathan for help, right?”

“yeah…” you said, unsure of where murray was getting at.

“why?”

“i don’t know.”

“well, there must be a reason why you asked him for help. instead of asking anyone else.”

realizing murray was genuinely waiting for an answer, you opened your mouth and closed it a couple times. until you finally said the only thing you could think of: the truth.

“he’s the only one who understands.”

murray looked satisfied, his face practically glowing with a ‘bingo!’ sign. you felt jonathan’s gaze on you, but you didn’t look at him.

“tell me, you used to be friends, didn’t you?”

“how…?” the question died in jonathan’s mouth, agape with surprise.

“what happened?” murray continued, his excitement growing more and more as he unraveled the mystery. “you broke his heart?” staring at your blank expression, he narrowed his eyes and tried, “he broke your heart?”

“we grew apart. it happens. it’s normal.”

jonathan scoffed, and you turned to him abruptly.

“what? what’s wrong about what i just said, jonathan? tell me.”

“nothing,” he shrugged, and you were so focused on him that you didn’t notice murray cackling to himself, as he watched everything fall into place like dominoes. “you just make it sound as if nothing happened.”

“nothing did.”

your heart was racing and your face felt as if it was burning, the same way it always did when jonathan worked you up like this. murray suddenly stood up from the chair, clearing his throat and breaking the tension.

“well, unfortunately, there’s only the bed in the guest room. but if you find each other’s presence so unbearable, one of you can always sleep in the bathtub.”

he gave you a big, snarky grin, and started walking up the stairs.

“for what is worth,” he continued, stirring the bottle of vodka. “i don’t think you two hate each other. i think it’s quite the opposite, actually.”

jonathan and you looked at each other. if there was one thing you both knew was that murray was insane, and that it was going to be a long night.

— ❀ —

“you’re taking up all the sheets, jeez.” you protested, kicking jonathan under the covers.

“and you’re taking up the whole bed.”

“come on.” you groaned.

“i’m almost falling, see?”

you rolled your eyes, knowing very well that he was exaggerating. but you still moved a bit to your side. the bed was already small, and you would gladly fall over the edge if it meant you wouldn’t feel his body against yours.

“happy?”

“euphoric.” he replied sarcastically.

“you know, he’s full of shit.” you stated, lying on your back, staring at the ceiling. “he does have another bed.”

“what?”

“mhm. he just wants to feed his weird fantasy of us sleeping together.”

jonathan scoffed. “it’s incredible. you always think the worst of people. you think the whole world revolves around you. but really, he probably couldn’t care less about us.”

“and you’re so naive.” you said, deciding you didn’t have the energy to think up a more elaborate insult. “you could’ve taken the couch.”

“you take the couch.”

you crossed your arms over your chest. “who does he think he is? prying into our lives like that.”

“he’s wasted.” he said simply. “but he did help.”

“yeah…” you whispered, hesitant to admit that jonathan was right. “yeah, i guess he did.”

“it was a good idea,” he cleared his throat. “watering down the story.”

“yeah.” you agreed, a smile creeping up on your face.

you had been the one who had had the idea of attenuating the lab's exposé. and even though jonathan wasn’t directly giving you credit for it, he was still praising something you had been responsible for.

and maybe that, along with the fact that you were sharing a bed at a stranger’s house, was just the little push you needed to say something that you would never have said otherwise.

“we’ve never talked about it.”

“about what?”

“come on, jonathan,” you looked at him tiredly. “you know what i mean.”

he gazed back at you. you were used to all the various looks jonathan gave you, but you had some trouble deciphering this particular one.

“there’s nothing to talk about.”

“oh, there isn’t?”

“no.”

you were really trying to talk to him, making an effort not to react. but it seemed as if his sole purpose was getting on your nerves.

“so we kiss, and then we go on like nothing happened, pretending like we hate each other, but there’s nothing to talk about?”

“i’m not pretending.”

you let out an unbelieving scoff, turning away. you could hear his breathing, an aggravating reminder that he really was there, instead of simply being a torturous figment of your imagination. you shut your eyes furiously, determined to ignore the body lying next to you and fall asleep.

it was easy to be angry at jonathan. anger felt safe, anger was fuel, a cage you could always lock yourself in whenever the outside world got too scary. if you hadn’t been feeling angry right now, you’d be feeling ashamed. ashamed that you had admitted something you shouldn’t have. ashamed that you felt something he didn't correspond.

at some point, you felt the mattress move underneath you. jonathan turned on his side as well, staring at your back.

“i’ve thought about it.”

even though there was a small space separating your bodies, you could feel his breath against your bare back, and the warmth radiating from his chest.

“what have you thought about?” you whispered. if you spoke quietly enough, maybe he wouldn’t hear you. maybe you could build your walls up again.

“i don’t hate you.”

those words were enough to make your heart skip a beat. you turned, now facing jonathan.

“i never did. but it was just… easier, i guess.” he confessed. “we grew apart. you started hanging out with the popular kids and i kept to myself even more. i saw you become this person that i didn’t know, and i…” he sighed. “i was jealous. angry. i had no reason to be, but i was. i thought we’d be friends forever, you know? and then we weren’t.”

you hesitated. you had been brave enough to come to a sketchy reporter’s house in order to expose a group of important people who were capable of ruining your life. but you weren’t sure if you were brave enough to say what you’ve always wanted to say.

“when we kissed at that stupid party, i thought things were gonna change between us. for the better.” even though your body was aching for you to look away, you didn’t. the conversation felt weak and vulnerable, but jonathan’s gaze made you feel strong.

“i know things were already different between us. but when we were together, it felt like old times. i realized that you hadn’t changed as much as i thought you had. i realized i hadn’t changed as much as i thought i had.”

jonathan attentively listened to every word, to the sound of your voice. he didn’t want to only hear what you were saying. he wanted to understand. he wanted to know what you had been feeling when he had been longing for you, as well.

“but then… you ignored me at school,” you whispered, remembering how your entire world had crumbled down one winter morning. “and you said we should’ve never kissed.”

“i never should’ve said that.” he spoke quietly, his eyes full of regret.

“why did you?”

“i don’t know.” he sighed. “i think i got scared. scared of what would happen.”

“but what could have happened?” you insisted. “what’s so bad about change?”

his hand twiched against his side, overcome by the strong impulse to move the strand of hair that had fallen on your face. but he pulled back.

“we could’ve figured it out together. we’ve always been a good team.” you said as you fixed your hair.

in the faint light, jonathan thought you looked so much like the person he’d use to have sleepovers with when he was younger. you’d always end up sleeping together, the extra mattress long forgotten. he remembered he always used to reach for you, without giving it a second thought. but now, it wasn’t as easy.

“and now we’re here.” he stated.

“now we’re here.” you repeated. “i knew i couldn’t do this alone. i also knew no one would believe me. but you did.”

little did he knew, you were also thinking about the time you had once shared. a great part of your life had had jonathan in it, and when he hadn't been there, you had felt as if you were living a life that wasn’t yours.

“you did.” you said again. “you always do.”

and i always will, jonathan wanted to say. but instead, it came out as,

“is it… too late to figure it out now?”

jonathan had faced a lot of change in his life, so he tended to keep away from it. as long as things stayed the same, he was safe. but now, seeing the way your face brightened up and your eyes seemed to spark with hope, he wanted to try. for you. with you.

“you tell me.” you said, wanting, wishing that he wanted the same thing you did.

he glanced at your lips, and your breath caught in your throat. never taking your eyes off his, you leaned in. not too much, but just enough. time seemed to slow down during those few seconds while you waited for him to do something, until he finally leaned in too, wordlessly telling you that you were both on the same page. you’d always had been.

“hating you is so much easier.” he whispered, lingering over your lips. his breath against your face was warm, and you couldn’t help the eager pounding of your heart, anticipating what was about to happen.

“but it’s not exactly true, is it?”

his lips were brushing yours now, your body tingling all over.

“no,” he mumbled, hands cupping your face. “it’s not.”

as soon as his mouth was on yours, you completely melted in his touch, all fear and tension disappearing as you let yourself be held by him. his hands were warm against your face, and you wished he’d never let go.

it wasn’t your first kiss. you two had already shared a shy, drunk kiss at one of steve harrington’s parties. yet this kiss was tentative and just as timid. the story you two shared hung in the air like night stars, new constellations arising as the story moved forward.

your hands found jonathan’s waist under the covers, gripping his shirt so you had something to hold on to. he pulled you even closer to him, and he was burning, and you were burning, and you felt as if the whole room was on fire.

but you didn’t care, you couldn't care about anything else, because no matter how much time had passed, jonathan always felt right. coming back to him was like finding your way back home after getting lost in the woods.

and even though he’d claim you bring out the best in him, you’d argue that it's actually the other way around.

jonathan’s hands moved about your hair and face, wanting to touch every single part of you. after what felt like hours, but not enough time, you both pulled away, catching your breaths.

he stared at you, a wide grin illuminating his face. he was the reason for your flushed cheeks and disheveled hair. and he loved it. he wanted to run his hands through your hair until it became even messier, only to fix it back into place.

“what?” you said softly, gazing up at him. “what are you thinking about?”

jonathan held your face, caressing your cheeks with his thumbs.

“he definitely lied about the bed.”

you let out a loud laugh, shaking your head as you wrapped your hands around his neck, pulling him in for another kiss.

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chidoroki · 1 year

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Maybe it's a unpopular opinion but i think that, whatever Isabella thought about it, shipping Ray would have destroyed her. She tried to keep her distance from him, because she was afraid to love him like her son, because she was unable to save him. She says "i couldn't dote on you" but she also thinks "i love you so much". She loves him so much when she tried to not. So i'm pretty sure that giving him to demon ans seeing him die (because she sees the kids die) would have broke her heart forever

Oh for sure. I don’t think anything could break her as much as Leslie’s departure did, but having to ship out Ray would definitely land a critical hit on her heart. No one would ever know this, of course. Isabella would hide her true emotions on a daily basis, as she does with every other kid she sends to the gate, but despite their very unusual and complicated mother-son relationship, she still cares for him as much as any other kid she had the chance to raise. We just don't get to see her loving nature towards Ray much because.. well, she's real damn good at her job.

I believe she only distanced herself after she learned that Ray was her actual son. Before Ray made the deal with her, there was no reason for her to treat him any different from anyone else. She thought he was just another kid she had to raise to be eaten for some demons to ensure her own survival. It sounds bad, I know, but it also means there was no point in acting fake around him. Everything she did pre-agreement was as genuine as she could get, given the circumstances of the house. For the first couple of years, she was nothing but a mom to him, just like she was to the other kids.

The distance between them grew once the deal came into play because they now saw each other as enemies. That actually helped them in regards to them handling their different situations and their own emotions, as the deal gave them different roles to act in. The whole shepherd/sheepdog idea made their interactions more civil and blunt. Sure they both ended up despising one another and plotting for the other’s downfall, but the agreement ultimately made it easier for them to deal with each other, as all their actions, words, thoughts, etc were as fake as could be. They learned that by twisting their relationship in such an insane way would help keep their emotions out of the picture so they can each pursue their goal in their never-ending game of chess, sneaking around their formalities to gain advantages over the other.

If they had to act like a real mother & son to each other with all the knowledge they both had about the farm, it would certainly make those last six years mentally and emotionally exhausting, no matter how hard they tried to hide it. Makes me wonder if Ray never offered up himself as her watchdog, would Isabella have shipped him off early instead? She kept Ray around since she could still control and use him as her own puppet, but I dunno if her love for him would’ve been strong alone to save him. She takes her caretaker job so seriously that love certainly couldn't save any other kid of hers, so despite Ray being her actual son, I wouldn’t doubt that she might’ve shipped him out prematurely here. His test scores could possibly gave him the chance to stay a bit longer, since she favors results more than the rules of the house, but there’s no way she could’ve ignored a kid who knew the secret and have them walk around the plantation carefree either. That would’ve created several problems. In the end, the deal was a huge benefit to them both. Obviously it spared Ray's life, but it also saved Isabella from getting even more emotionally attached to him by tossing their precious relationship aside.

Of course I know she does love him deep down. All I need to prove it is this one page that still manages to break my heart in several pieces and oh my god y’all I love them so damn much aaaaahhhh. Damn it Shirai! Did you really have to do this to them? And to me??

Aside from all the occasions I’ve spoken about Isabella loving her kids & Ray, ch 181.7 also throws the truth right in our faces once more thanks to Ray’s goodbye note. I recently mentioned in my 182days posts how touching it was for Isabella to hold onto the children's stuff because it shows us how near and dear they all were to her heart, so while she does eventually use the note to gain trust from Matilda & the other ladies, I firmly believe she kept it as a memento of Ray first and foremost. We see her holding onto that note here as if it’s just the most precious thing in the world and it warms my heart knowing that she kept it on her person the night of the escape since the entire house literally went up in flames and everything else in it was lost. If her love for Ray was this obvious to the four sisters who barely knew a thing about her, then it had to be clear as hell to her actual kids.

The love she feels for her kids (& Ray most importantly) should also be common knowledge to us readers as well, but I see some people doubt it every now and then still. It's fine, really. People will always see her as a villain and that's understandable. But *gestures to everything I ever said about this woman* hello?? Pfftt. ANYWAYS! Thanks for letting me ramble on about these two! (and if you're the same anon who sent the other ask that came in right after this one then I'll be answering that one shortly.)

#a wild ask appeared #the promised neverland #tpn manga #tpn ray #tpn isabella #ray #mother isabella #chidoroki used chatter

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kings-highway · 6 months

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I read Time Enough yesterday from start to finish (yes I had other things to do, no that did not stop me) and I am still thinking about it. I left a little comment but I wanted to say more. (Sorry if this is a bit incomprehensible, I'm Very tired)

Your angst is always written in such an immersive and impressive way, but this story in particular hit so strongly. I thought it was so well done. Everything Daichi did and felt was so believable. And the feelings of having to move through a life like that was absolutely heart breaking. The relationships were so believable and idk how to phrase it other than genuine? Realistic?

It was just such an intense and beautiful piece, and Daichi's journey/cycle of monotony to acting out to trying to find stability again was so well done and so relatable. I was right along with him at one point like "obviously he has to learn a lesson here, but come on he did! He's trying to live life more!" Only to realize at the end that he still really wasn't, not really, not in the way that really allowed him to appreciate it. It wasn't that he needed to appreciate life by acting more or less predictable, it's that he needed to learn to appreciate life by appreciating his own, by learning to take care of himself, by asking for help and letting others take care of him. I've read several of your stories now where this is a major theme for him and I was STILL too immersed in his mindset to see it right away! That's very good writing imo <3

If you want to answer (ik some people don't like explaining story choices and that's fine too! I have my theories) what moment in that last day was it that broke the loop? Or was there no one moment, but just the process of the day itself and those leading up to it that did it?

First, thank you so much for leaving such a lovely and sincere ask in my inbox. You've got my giggling and kicking my feet like a child on christmas. It means so much that someone like you is reading and appreciating my work 🤍🤍

Second, I dont mind answering at all! I know a few others had speculated regarding the circumstances of the time loop so I can definitely share my decision making process

[Spoilers for literally nearly every chapter of Time Enough below, if you havent read it yet.]

And the answer is... Nothing.

Though that doesnt mean it wasnt intentional on my part, that nothingness means something to me.

The logic of the time loop is simply "sometimes time gets stuck in a loop, and unfortunately this time Daichi is aware of it." There is no real reason why it breaks on that specific day that it does, it could have just as easily broken the day before or the day after or in twelve years.

While I played around with the idea of Daichi having to "break" it in some way, there was no version of that that didnt position someone in his life as more important than another, or incite further questions about the universe. (although it does make me giggle imagining if the second half took a sharp left turn into Daichi and Oikawa hunting and fighting aliens.)

You could read this story as a metaphor for depression or burnout, optionally.

The truth is, every choice Daichi made always mattered. Each day did not come with definitive evidence that it would loop again into the next, it just coincidentally did for approximately two years. As suddenly and jarringly as it breaks in the 11th chapter, that could have been any chapter. Thats why so many end with the 00:00 moment, because it wasn't a given and it was important to mention. What would have happened if it had broken after he's slept with and romanced Oikawa? [Would he have pursued this new connection? left it as a one night stand? how would his life have moved forward after that kind of insane connection as Oikawa would believe he had his time loop experience?] What would have happened if it had broken after Tendou had been hit by the truck? [Tendou would be dead - what will he tell anyone?] What if it had broken after punching Iwaizumi? While he's standing, frostbitten in Iceland? After any random day he thought didnt matter? After he kills himself?

Daichi was never any more safe from his consequences in the loop as he was in linear time, he just got lucky.

And thats the point. How many times have you [the reader] skipped a class because its "boring and repetive?" phone in an essay because its "just" 10%? declined to hang out with a friend you havent seen in a while because "eh, maybe next weekend."

Choices always matter. Even if you think you have calculated the worst possible end, every single day has the ability to dramatically shift the direction of your life if you use it right. There is no such thing as a day that doesnt matter.

As a metaphor for depression and burnout, you're absolutely right. Daichi's loop is broken the moment he tells Suga that he'll let him take care of him. The moment he admits there's a problem and makes a promise he intends to keep. The act of loving and being loved in return is scary and difficult but sometimes it is the only way to succeed. [Its important here to mention that this is not romantic love I refer to.] And that means trying. Agreeing to do something you think is pointless [Daichi doesnt believe a psychiatrist can help; its a time loop] but he trusts Suga anyway and agrees sincerely.

As a story, it was nothing anyone did.

Daichi just got lucky that when the loop broke he was safe and surrounded by people who would care for him.

Free will and individual agency are massive themes in my stories and perhaps thats just a product of my own current age and experience. I think in a lot of ways I havent quite gotten the hang of it myself even if I understand it in my mind. Understanding it intuitively is a lot harder.

But it gets a little bit easier for me when I can write it out and share it with people like you who care as much for these characters and stories and appreciate them in the same way.

Thank you so much for asking <3 Inbox is always open and yall can message me any time if you wanna chat about anything to just scream. [The chickens in my brain will do their best to scream back.]

#haikyuu fanfiction writer #haikyuu fanfiction #daichi sawamura

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