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yeochikin · 4 years

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of coffees and spells. | j. wooyoung

a/n: thank you so much @fvrcore for requesting a wooyoung fluff! i tried something new but still held onto the fluff concept bcs haha i suck at angst pls jfhdj this is a long read with maybe a few inaccuracies as well. so please do forgive me! i enjoyed writing this though so i hope you enjoyed reading this as much as i enjoyed writing this! ✨💖

word count: 11k+ (idk man i lost count djfhh)

warnings: uhh inaccuracies with spells and the likes maybe, a few swears too. other than that, there isn’t anything else!

a soft sigh was slowly emitted from slightly chappy yet moist lips, courtesy of the warm tea swirling ever so gently in your favourite mug you are holding in your cold hands. your favourite blanket was draped over your shoulders while you admired how the stars and moon were hanging on the night sky above your head, shining ever so brightly. this certain time of day has always been your favourite, or should you call it time of night? ah, whatever. what matters is that you find comfort during the night.

speaking of the night, it was rather quiet, save for the sounds of the night’s wind breezing through that would make the leaves of the trees surrounding your cottage rustle every now and then, the wind chime hanging idly on the arch of your porch gently chiming by the wind as well, and of course, let’s not forget the crickets playing their songs into the night.

of course, you are not completely away from civilisation, where else could you get your basic needs if not from the town’s market? if you had a dollar every time someone asked if you lived deep within the wilderness, surely you could at least be a millionaire by now. truly, you feel amused with such assumptions being thrown in your direction. and as for money? why, you used to work in a little coffee house just a little over a month ago. from there, you worked on a lot of different pastries that ranged from sponge cakes to muffins to breads! and also from there, you had the determination to open up your own place when you have the sufficient funds.

and before you know it, tomorrow’s finally the day to open up your own little bakery in town, aurora bakery was the name you had decided. coincidentally, right in front of the coffee house you used to work in. despite being another place where one could hang out, the pressure of being possible rivals with the coffee house was not present. if it wasn’t for the coffee place, you wouldn’t have found out the love for baking. the thought of opening said shop up is already enough to make your chest bubble with excitement as the corners of your lips twitched up. that was, until..

CRASH!

‘oops!’

with furrowed brows at the sudden noise (and the voice that invaded your mind) from the inside, you looked over your shoulder to gaze through the window to see whatever the hell was making the noise. to your surprise, your little.. feline friend standing on one of the several shelves that were hung on the walls of your cottage’s living room. the contents of the shelves varied from glass bottles, to dried herbs, to jars of objects filled in them, some recognisable while some of the contents were just unknown.

following their gaze on the floor, a previously glass bottle with some type of red liquid had covered your floor. sighing, you got up from your seat and immediately went inside to clean up the mess.

there goes your peaceful night.

“leo, this is the fourth time you broke one of my potion bottles!” you hissed, immediately looking for your broom and dustpan right next to the door.

said cat merely had his tail swishing from back and forth as he blinked boredly at you, curling up into a little ball afterwards.

‘sorry, a cat’s instincts.’ the voice appeared in your mind yet again, undoubtedly from the cat friend in front of you.

“more like an asshole’s instincts.” you grumbled underneath your breath, and with a wave of your hands, the broom started sweeping the broken glass pieces into the dustpan, promptly throwing them into the almost full trash bin as you made a mental note to empty it out later during the morning.

ah, yes. potion bottles, jars of unknown objects, things in your house moving in the air by itself with a simple wave of your hands, a talking feline friend, living in a cottage just outside of town alone? there was no doubt the same answer would pop up into a stranger’s mind.

a witch.

sure, you don’t always wear black like it would be someone’s funeral every day of the year, nor do you have a long and pointy nose along with a high pitched laugh that could easily split someone’s ears. but is it really necessary to pinpoint someone as such just by those three points? oh how the stories you heard from the townsfolk with their assumptions were an eye roll or managed to make you feel amused.

times have changed, yet you still wonder as to why people seemed to still have such a mindset on witches.

so far, you are the only witch in town. surprisingly, no one has caught onto the fact that a little witch has been living near them for a few years now. you didn’t really care if someone had caught on though, there’s always a special drink you could come up with to erase that certain fact away from their minds or with a discreet snap of your fingers along with an incantation, it would be washed away.

it was understandable as to why your parents were against letting you move away from the safe haven they had created in another town you used to live in, afraid that someone would have found out about your true identity. but of course, as mentioned before, a simple spell or potion could do the trick. besides, you were sure you could handle it yourself. with enough convincing and reassurance, your parents finally let you go. and as some type of companion, your parents insisted on bringing one of your many pets from home to go with you. thus, having leo by your side.

true, you felt homesick at times, but the feeling was always washed away whenever leo would come up to your side and snuggle to you in bed, silently knowing how you felt deep within. if a huge chance was on your side, you could even go back to your old place for a little while to catch up on your parents, telling all of the interesting events during your endeavours.

speaking of visiting, you had made a mental note to visit them as soon as possible, wanting to tell them about the little bakery you are about to open.

‘it’s late, young lady. stop thinking too much, you’re being too loud.’ a grouchy voice interfered with your thoughts, knowing full well who it belonged to.

with a roll of your eyes, you made your way to the bathroom to do your nightly routine of washing your face, brushing your teeth, and burning the incense you had made earlier in the afternoon, sighing in content once the sweet smell of roses had wafted into your nose as soon as you got comfortable in bed.

slowly, you let the soft sound of the rustling leaves, the soft chiming from the wind chime, and the crickets of the night lull you to sleep, getting enough rest before the big day tomorrow.

❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀

“one, two!” you heaved pulling out the last tray filled with chocolate filled croissants out of the huge oven, walking out of the kitchen to the front of the bakery with leo balancing himself on your shoulders.

‘you’re a witch, why are you going through this?’ grumbled leo.

“you seem to think that it would be easy for me to use my powers in broad daylight where half of the town could see.” you retorted, walking over to the glass display so you could place the freshly baked pastries next to the other ones.

“plus, i don't see why you are complaining considering you're just watching me.” you added.

you didn’t bother to answer the cat’s next complaint, merely pulling him off of your shoulders to let him rest on top of the counter. a satisfied purr resonated against the feline’s neck as your fingers scratched behind his ears. smiling proudly to yourself and placed both hands on your hips to marvel your hard work of the day. you had spent most of the morning just decorating the empty spots of the bakery, baking the treats, and wiped the tables clean. nodding faintly, you decided that it was time.

it was time to flip the sign to ‘open’. with that, aurora bakery is officially open for business!

while expecting for customers to hopefully smell the scent of freshly baked goods attracted them to your little bakery, you grabbed your broom and started sweeping away the dried leaves just outside of your bakery as if to busy yourself a little more without having to bore yourself waiting (another part not wanting to bicker with the annoying feline in your bakery), and occasionally greeted the few townspeople that recognised you. pausing slightly in your sweeping to wipe away the thin sheet of sweat that had formed on your forehead with the back of your hand, it was only then you noticed that another pair of eyes was watching you.

there, in the coffee house in front of your bakery, you noticed a raven haired boy leaning against the doorway with his arms crossed. an unfamiliar face to you, could he be a new resident of this small town you lived in?

with the short sleeved collared shirt he wore, you could faintly make out what seems to be a tattoo on his arm but with the distance, it was difficult to make out what it was. his wavy hair was parted right in the center with a dark ebony colour that reminded you of the sky just last night. his eyes, though half-lidded, held some type of cheekiness in them. however, his appearance wasn't the one that caught your attention. the male’s aura for some reason was rather… different yet familiar? if that could even make sense. true, he had a mysterious air around him though he radiated another energy that you can't quite put your finger on.

'it's rude to stare, young lady.’

blinking a few times, you glared down at the furball sitting next to your legs, partly embarrassed that you were caught staring and partly wanting to turn the cat into one of those fortune cat dolls you see every time you were in a family restaurant around town. leo only stared up at you with an unamused expression then to the male just in front of you. following his gaze yet again, you turned to look at the boy but instead, he already turned on his heels and walked further into the coffee house with both hands tightening the strings of his apron around his waist.

“i wonder if he just moved in, haven't really seen him before.” you mumbled before feeling a slight tug on your dress shirt, immediately catching your attention to look down.

a little girl with two high pigtails stared up at you with her huge eyes, one hand on the fabric of your shirt while the other tightly held a stuffed bunny close to her side. she looked to be about six years old. you smiled gently and kneeled down to match your height with hers, tilting your head to the side in question.

“hey, cutie. what can i do to help you?” you spoke, tone all soft as if you were afraid to scare her away.

with sheepish eyes shifting over at your face then to her shoes, then back to you, she held out a ten dollar bill, causing you to confusedly blink at her actions. it took the girl a few more seconds before parting her lips to speak.

“i smelled something really nice from your… bread house and, and i have money that mommy gave me earlier, and can i buy something with this?” she asked.

internally, you were about to combust at how adorable with the way she was talking along with the fact that she had called your bakery ‘bread house’. you were happy to say that having a cute girl as your first customer managed to be the highlight of your day so far. nodding your head, you stood back up on your feet and held out your hand for her to take.

“of course! why don't you come inside and see what interests you, little one.” you cooed, melting on the inside at how she carefully took your hand in her own smaller one as her features brightened up out of happiness before the both of you walked back inside, leo trudging shortly from behind.

you watched as the little girl looked around the bakery in awe, no doubt amazed at the various treats on display, before running towards the ones that were in the large glass case. kneeling down once again next to her, you couldn't help but to release a chortle that bubbled in your chest.

before you know it, a couple more townspeople had visited your little bakery. hopefully, things are looking up. with a huge grin on your face, you stood up on your feet, getting ready to assist the customers.

“welcome to aurora bakery!”

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you hummed to a soft tune as you kneaded the dough, leo napping on top of the shelves in your bakery’s kitchen. thankfully, his so-called cat instincts didn’t push the jars of flour and spices that adorned the many shelves. had he did so, you swear you would make him take your place instead of you. you didn’t realise how much time has passed as you were too focused on assisting the customers that walked into your bakery, along with cleaning the tables, and of course, continuing to refill the trays with your treats. though, judging by the rays of crimson slipping through the thin curtains hanging above your windows, you made a random guess that it was near late afternoon.

as soon as you placed the dough into the oven to let it bake and went to wash your hands from the excess dough sticking on your skin, a quiet ‘ding’ from the bells hanging on your door signified a customer had walked into your cafe. wiping your hands on your apron with a quick fix of the crescent shaped clip that threatened to fall off of your hair, you made your way out to the front to greet the said customer.

“welcome to- oh.” you accidentally let the words die off in our throat. really, you didn’t mean to.

standing in front of the cashier, you were met with the same cheeky eyes from before staring into your own. it was the boy from the coffee house! with his elbows resting on top of the counter, you could finally see that the tattoo on his arm was in the shape of, what looks like, a fox, a snow fox to be specific. you also noticed the little mole just underneath his eye. like before, you once again felt the familiar yet still unfamiliar energy surrounding the male. odd.

“well, hello, miss baker.” he greeted, simpering at the way you had paused in your steps.

his voice was soft, catching you off guard yet you remained a calm demeanour. it wasn’t bad at all. the tone reminded you of… of milk coffee warming you up during a rainy evening. you didn’t know if it made sense but if you had to mean it in another way, it was just… soft. shaking your head to finally get it together, you sent him a polite smile as you walked closer to the counter.

“ah, you are the boy from the coffee house. how can i help you?” you asked.

leo as if he could hear you, suddenly appeared in your peripheral vision as he jumped onto the counter next to you and gave out a soft purr as you scratched behind his ears. his eyes stared at the tattoo that was inked on the boy’s skin with intrigue. the boy smiled down at your feline friend and switched his gaze to yours.

“well, i thought i would stop by and say ‘hi’. i haven’t really seen you around before, the town’s baker at that.” he replied, quirking a brow up.

“now that you mentioned it, i’ve never seen you before. are you perhaps new around here?” you asked, tilting your head to the side ever so slightly.

the question made the corner of his lips stretch further into a grin, you could faintly make out how the apples of his cheeks looked fuller once he did so. as much as you didn’t want to admit it, you knew that deep down he looks rather cute.

“i guess grandpa didn’t tell you his grandson finally took over his coffee house once he retired, huh?” he chuckled, straightening up to shove his hands into his denims.

the look of realisation already says it all, much expected from the male with how he let out another chortle. sure, you had heard from the old man in the coffee house telling you stories about his grandson during the time you were still working there. though, the said boy never once visited. it ranged from whatever he did as a child to him during the years of growing up. however, you failed to learn the fact that his grandson would be the one taking over the coffee house. or the fact he finally retired. much less, so soon. what you clearly remember, was the name the old man had mentioned a few times.

“you must be.. jung wooyoung?” you said, though the way you had worded it coming out as more of a question.

a look of surprise was etched onto the male’s face before it softened, holding one hand out to point at himself.

“the one and only. and you are..?” he trailed off, you catching up immediately.

“i’m y/n, y/n l/n.” you introduced, a huge grin plastered over your lips.

“it’s nice to meet the baker. i guess we will run into each other more often than not, eh?” he grinned.

“you say that as if i even have a choice to open up a bakery someplace else.” you mused, causing the male in front of you to release a hearty laugh.

you noted at the high pitched laugh he had, finding it contagious as you can’t help but to find yourself chortling along. despite the aura around him, you would have to say that his presence was rather warm.

“so, how can i help the town's, um, new coffee maker for today?” you asked.

‘i don’t know, his taxes maybe?’ leo’s voice interrupted, making you discreetly pull at his tail, just enough for him grumble, ears twitching as he looked up at you. honestly, someone is in need of a cat nap rather than the one working back and forth in the bakery all day.

“ah, it would be rude to stay and not have anything, no?” wooyoung replied before his irises looked around the bakery, only stopping at a certain treat as he pointed towards the cinnamon rolls.

“i’ll have two of those, miss baker.”

“coming right up!”

and with that, your nimble fingers made a quick work of placing the treats into a little box before placing a little cat sticker as a seal so that the treats wouldn’t fall out of the box. satisfied, you gave the said male his treats, promptly thanking him once he paid. it was when your fingertips brushed against one another that you felt a sudden chill down your spine.

could he… no, he can’t be.

“thank you for this, y/n. in return, why don’t you come to the coffee house once you’re free?” wooyoung winked, a certain glint shining in his irises as he spoke.

“h-huh? oh yeah, sure, definitely!” you said, still recovering from the chilling sensation down your spine.

and with that, the boy turned on his heel to walk out of the bakery. though it seems normal, something had caught your eye.

the exact fox tattoo had moved from its place on his arm to the back of his neck, its eyes blinking over at you.

quickly rubbing your eyes with the back of your hands, the fox on his nape was gone. were you dreaming?

‘young lady, your bread’s gonna burn in the oven!’ leo called out, making you quickly turn to rush back into the kitchen to take the bread out of the oven.

you are the only witch in town. you were certain of that.

❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀

that night in the grassy field right in front of your little cottage, you were hunched over in front of your cauldron, hands idly stirring the ladle into the concoction while your eyes had read over the instructions of your spellbook. as usual, leo was balancing himself on your shoulder blades. despite him being an annoying (and grumpy) ball of fur, he surely knows what or what not to add to whatever you are currently doing.

with a few trials and errors, along with you and leo bickering, and some ingredients being tossed in, the dark navy mixture swirling in your cauldron lit up. at first it was rather dim but after a few more stirs in the mixture, the light grew brighter and brighter while the concoction started to bubble up. you had to shield your eyes once leo told you to back away from the cauldron, a ringing sound resonating throughout the area. you could hear liquid gurgling and some type of low thrum filling the silent night. once you were sure it was safe to open your eyes, you carefully moved your palm away from your face to look at your result. upon doing so, your eyes widened.

in front of you, stood a large mirror-like object just on top of the cauldron. the huge smile on your lips along with your tense shoulders relaxing, it was safe to say that the little experiment you tried out worked. there, you could see your parents standing with your reflection. your mother had an excited grin on her brims while your father, though with an emotionless expression, the twinkle in his eyes gave it away.

“y/n! you have finally gotten the hang of conjuring up the spell your father taught you.” came your mother’s cheerful tone.

‘yes, without my help little witch right here would’ve summoned up a flame thrall by accident.’ leo responded, his own reflection had him curling his tail around your mother’s leg.

“not impossible. let’s not forget the time where y/n had forgotten to add a heart stone before spawning up a wolf familiar. the whole house was a huge mess trying to make the wolf go back to its realm.” your father mused, much to your embarrassment.

see, you didn’t have any problems with casting illusion spells, nor did you have any trouble in the restoration spells as well. but for some reason, conjuration spells were a bit of a difficult task for you. you remembered the time where you accidentally conjured up a one eyed troll instead of a pixie at the age of ten. it was a good thing your father was around to immediately petrify the troll before it could squash you with its giant club, and dismiss it back into another realm. let’s just say that you were grounded with a month’s worth of studying ingredients for potions after that incident.

“i thought we didn’t need a heart stone.” you grumbled.

“you don’t need it if you want to make your wolf guardian a worthy opponent.” your father deadpanned, causing you to pout over at him, leo snickering at you.

“all jokes aside, how are you, my dear?” your mother’s soothing voice came through, immediately reminding you of the main reason why you had decided to call them in the first place.

“i’ve been alright, mother. i’ve even opened up my own bakery in town right in front of the old coffee house i used to work in!” you said, thumbs twiddling with each other.

while your mother was delighted that you’re doing well, your father was rather quiet. eyes as sharp as a hawk, your father noticed your movements. from the years of watching you grow up and having to deal with you trying to hide away the little mischief you had caused since you were a mere toddler, he couldn’t help but to release a low chuckle.

“is there something else we don’t know?” your father suddenly asked, causing you to flinch slightly in place.

“n-no!”

“y/n..” he said sternly, causing you to sigh out of defeat, shoulders deflating.

“father.. how do you know if another witch is around you?”

the pair in the mirror-like portal looked at one another upon hearing your question then back at you, your mother moving to place her hands on your shoulders.

“are you safe, my child?” your mother asked, though she was a mere… ‘illusion’ through the mirror, it felt as if your mother really was there enveloping your entire frame as the familiar sweet fragrance she usually wore while you still lived them wafted into your nose.

“yes, i am safe, mother. i can assure you that.” you spoke softly.

“it’s just that.. the grandson of the owner in that coffee house took over. old man had finally retired.” you added, your parents merely nodded, making you continue as they were listening intently.

“he seemed pretty nice, though he had an.. aura that seemed to be intriguing. no one else in the town has that certain aura but him.” you continued.

“are you sure you will be alright, y/n?” came your mother’s worried tone, your father holding her hand.

“our child is a strong one, i’m sure y/n can handle it.” he reassured. your mother, on the other hand, merely stared between you and your father before releasing a low sigh.

“alright. just remember to cast a ward spell around your place whenever you sleep.” she said.

‘no need, she has been burning her self-made sages for a while now. might say that it’s quite useful.’ leo said, mewling up at the older woman.

it was when the light in the mirror somehow started to grow dim, indicating that the remaining time you had with your parents was slowly coming to an end. your parents, seeing the same thing as well, took a couple steps back from you, their hands intertwined with each other’s.

“it’s time for you to sleep, my child.” your mother said, you noticed how her eyes became a tad glossy. your father held her close to him and rubbed a hand on her arm reassuringly. the sight in front of you was enough to make your throat clench.

“we wish you well in your endeavours, y/n. stay safe, and good luck with the bakery.” your father said.

“take care of her, leo.” he added, the cat merely bowing his head and blinking slowly.

and with that, the object shone brightly once more, making you take a few steps back upon hearing leo telling you to do so with an arm covering your eyes. the familiar ringing noise was heard and then, silence surrounded you once again. you took your arm away from your eyes and saw how the cauldron from earlier laid idly on the grass, the fire you had prepared earlier was put out. taking a deep breath as you felt a slight rush of emotions, you went to pick up the cauldron, and the spellbook.

‘it’s late, young lady. we have another busy day at the bakery tomorrow.’ leo mewled, rubbing his body against your leg.

with a gentle smile, you leaned down so the cat could climb on your shoulders once again, purring as the two of you made your way inside the cottage so you could get started on your night routine before sleeping.

for some reason, a fox with fur as white as snow visited your dreams that night.

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it has been a few weeks now ever since your little bakery opened up. you weren’t exactly that popular nor was the bakery completely deserted of customers as well. you had your fair share of busy days, some days you had to even go for a quick run to the town’s market to get the ingredients that you had run out of. though, you weren’t complaining. you loved working at the bakery. something about seeing the people having their expressions brighten ever so slightly as soon as they took a bite out of your treats would always make you feel giddy on the inside.

and sometimes, when you really have to use it, you would quietly whisper an incantation or two to someone’s treat whenever you see them struggling with their day upon stepping through the doors of your bakery. your eyes holding a jovial twinkle once you see the happy expressions on their faces once they took a bite out of the treat.

“alright, time to close up.” you mumbled. and with a couple claps of your hands, the broom floated in the air before making its way towards your outstretched hand.

with that, you started to sweep the tiled floor and the daily routine of cleaning your bakery. whenever you did tricks like these, you made sure to keep it on the down low, only using it when you were really sure no one could see you doing so.

“good evening, miss baker.” wooyoung greeted, making you cease momentarily of picking up the empty trays for the day, mentally thanking yourself that he didn’t walk in just in time to see the floating broom.

ah, yes, jung wooyoung. it is no doubt that he is the old man’s grandson, alright. everyone in town loves him, saying his humble and bright personality reminded them of his grandfather, though with added snarkiness to it. but of course, they were all lighthearted.

on your days of not working in the bakery, you would find yourself spending time in the male’s coffee house. honestly, you weren’t a huge know-it-all when it came to coffee. all you know is that any type of caffeine being consumed by you will make you stay up all night. wooyoung was the one who would introduce you to the types of coffee he had in the place. from the weakest one to the strongest one, though you still can’t make any difference from them considering that it would still make you stay awake.

the two of you shared a similar bond for sweet things though. whenever you came to his coffee house, you would make sure to bring cinnamon rolls when he mentioned that your cinnamon rolls were really good during the first time you hung out at the coffee house. and just how you would bring cinnamon rolls to his place, the raven haired boy would make sure to bring two coffees (one of them with the appropriate amount of caffeine in them) during your break time.

it was during those hangouts the two of you grew closer but for some reason, you still couldn’t figure the unknown aura enveloping the male, the thought still gnawing in the back of your mind. and the snow fox tattoo on his arm.. it reminded you of the dreams you had been getting frequently now. you swear that sometimes you could see it staring at you with its fluffy tail swishing and curling around wooyoung’s neck. either that or you just really need to get your eyes checked.

or ask your mother if there was some type of restoration spell to fix your eyesight.

“well, if it isn’t, coffee boy. coming over for our daily hangouts again?” you replied, wooyoung following you to your kitchen to help with carrying the trays.

the boy leaned against the faux marbled counter crossing his arms. since he was wearing a long sleeved pale green shirt, the fox tattoo was hidden underneath it. as much as you were irritated with the fact your eyes could play tricks on you because of the damned fox tattoo, you would have to admit that you would find yourself admiring the details of his inked skin. sometimes you would catch yourself wanting a tattoo yourself but you were a little nervous around needles, unfortunately.

“ah, i can’t today sadly, i need to check the ingredients back home.” he replied, you looked over your shoulder with an eyebrow raised up.

“ingredients for..?”

“for my poti- ah!” the sudden squeak that left his lips was enough to make you turn around in alarm, wondering if he had hurt himself.

there, you see wooyoung aggressively rubbing his tattooed arm with his eyes glowering down at the fox tattoo. your eyebrows creased in confusion at the sight, was his tattoo still hurting him? surely that can’t be the reason. his head lifted up so your gazes could meet at once you asked if he was alright, you noticing the way his pupils were shaking as if he was nervous about something.

“oh yeah, i’m okay!” he quickly responded, hiding his arm behind his back.

“you were saying..” you continued as you placed the washed trays away, leaning against the sink.

you had expected that wooyoung would answer your question but instead, he walked closer to you. closer and closer. your eyes widened ever so slightly at his actions, leo on the shelf had his tail all fluffed up while his pointy ears flattened over his head as if preparing to pounce on the male if he planned on doing something to you. though you were nervous, you had kept a calm composure while reviewing all the protective incantations in your mind, or if that failed, you were ready to kick him between the legs.

you were about to cast a spell on him when the male held his hand up until you felt him picking softly at your hair, near your star shaped hair clip, then took a few steps back, showing you the pieces of dried batter that somehow managed to get on your hair.

“you got something in your hair there, miss baker.” he spoke softly, his expression softening up.

“also, i meant to say the ingredients for the coffee house. some were running out in the place already so i needed to check if i still have some at home.” wooyoung added smoothly.

“ah, that’s alright then. i guess i’ll see you tomorrow?” you asked, still trying to calm the rapid beating of your heart from earlier.

“yeah, see you, miss baker!” he bid then turned around to walk away, leaving you slumped against the sink.

‘what the hell was that?’ leo exclaimed, tail swaying from side to side.

“don’t ask me, i’m as stumped as you are.” you sighed, pushing yourself off of the sink and looked around the kitchen to see if there was any more cleaning to do until your eyes landed on a certain box filled with cinnamon rolls.

with a sharp gasp, you grabbed the box and quickly made your out of the kitchen. you hoped that you could at least catch up with the raven haired male yet as soon as you stepped out, emptiness greeted you instead. your eyebrows furrowed as you walked directly outside of your bakery, looking around for wooyoung but he wasn’t there. you crossed the cobbled street and peeked through the windows of the coffee shop, still nothing. the place had its lights turned off, even the kitchen.

“how the hell did he walk so fast?” you grumbled, walking back inside.

oh well, maybe you could just give it to him tomorrow. for now, you had a bakery to close.

❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀

“thank you, come again!” wooyoung’s voice rang throughout the coffee house, sighing in relief as he bid goodbye to the last customer for the day before his hands untied the tied strings of the brown apron around his waist.

“today’s a little busier than usual. don’t you think, yuki?” he mumbled, rolling up his sleeves to see the fox tattoo on his arm.

on his skin, the snow fox tattoo on his arm slowly uncurled itself from the tight ball she was in before yawning then wagged her fluffy tail happily, a clear indication she was content. how wooyoung managed to hide his enchanted tattoo from the public’s eye was astonishing, knowing full well how foxes could be sneaky and full of mischief, whether in tattoo form or not. if wooyoung could have a dollar every time yuki would disappear from his arm and ended up in a different part of his body, he could be a millionaire. though the idea was pleasant, it also made wooyoung scold her since someone could see her easily. but of course, he couldn’t stay mad at her for long. she was too adorable for her own good.

and being the only witch in town (or so he thought) wooyoung needed to be extra careful as well.

honestly, wooyoung never felt the pain of being inked. being a witch himself, he just managed to conjure it up on his own skin and enchanted it so it could move by itself. hence, the reason why yuki would often move from place to place on his body. sometimes even jumping out to grow into a full size snow fox once she wanted to stretch her legs and not be stuck on skin. and knowing how the fox had so much energy packed in her, yuki would sometimes visit wooyoung in his dreams just to have an extra playtime with the male. though, when she’s feeling cheeky, she tends to jump to someone else’s dreams, someone who wooyoung would think occasionally before falling asleep.

drying the last coffee mug, wooyoung looked over at the bakery on the side of the street. his eyebrows furrowed at the sight of your bakery’s lights were still on. normally, you would close earlier than wooyoung’s coffee house every saturday and sunday since the both of you knew the town wasn’t as busy on weekends.

“she’s still at the bakery. wanna go check up on her, yuki?” the raven haired male said, looking down at his forearm, smiling at the sight of his companion hopping in circles excitedly.

locking up the coffee house, wooyoung made quick strides across the street to reach your bakery. peeking through the windows, his eyebrows furrowed in confusion that he couldn’t see you, instead your lights were still on. curiosity got the best of him and soon, wooyoung found himself inside. the smell of pastries still lingered in the air as soon as he entered the place. everything in the bakery looked normal, nothing out of the ordinary. that was until he walked into the kitchen, a sharp gasp leaving his lips at the sight.

your broom was floating in the air, not only that, it was sweeping by itself. wooyoung had to rub his eyes immediately to make sure they were not tricking him, maybe he even drank a lot of coffee to the point where he’s hallucinating things. however, those ideas were thrown out the window once he saw that the broom was still moving by itself, lightly tapping against his foot as if indicating him to move over so it could sweep over where he was standing, to which made him quickly move away.

his irises looked around the place before they landed on one of the many shelves that hung on the kitchen walls, a familiar glass bottle with some type of golden liquid filled in them to be exact. to someone’s eyes, it could easily be mistaken as a bottle of honey but does honey radiate a bright yellow light?

swallowing thickly, so many things were running through his mind. but all answers already pointed to one thing.

“wooyoung!”

with wide eyes, the male spun around, almost falling on his own from how fast he had moved. there, you stood in front of him with leo on your shoulders, both of your eyes were wide as you realised the broom was still moving on its own. with a quick snap of your fingers, the broom stilled by itself and fell idly on the floor.

“l-listen!” you started, heartbeat rising as your hands started to get all clammy as you were caught.

“...a witch.” was the first thing wooyoung had said.

silence hung over the both of you. it was so quiet that it was almost deafening.

your mind was racing with all the possibilities of what wooyoung could do when he found out about your true identity. you wanted to use the incantation to him forget what he just witnessed yet your throat felt constricted, as if someone was clutching on your vocal chords so you just stood there in front of the raven haired male who stared at you with his jaw dropped. once you felt a little confident, you shakily reached a hand up, about to snap your fingers as you whispered the incantation.

“wait, wait! i’m happy that you’re a witch too!” wooyoung interjected quickly, knowing full well which spell you were about to cast.

wait.. too?

“what..?” you whispered, the hand lifted near your face dropping to your side.

the surprised face on wooyoung’s features slowly melted away at the realisation he had, replacing it with a relieved yet jovial expression. you, on the other hand, stood there, the idea of being found out and having to move away from the town when you just started your own business was still lingering in your mind.

by now, the two of you were seated at one of your tables, as what wooyoung had suggested so that the two of you could talk. it took a couple of times for wooyoung to reassure you, yuki even jumping out of his arm as she attempted to help her owner comfort you, nuzzling her head against your hand. leo was on the counter of your cash register, sharp yet curious eyes watching the snow fox grow from a mere ink to a full sized snow fox.

although finally calmed down, your head was still in your hands as you tried to get a hold of the things that had happened.

“so, what you’re saying is.. you’re a witch too? does that make the old man a witch too?” you said, lifting your head to look at the male who only smiled sheepishly in return.

“well, grandpa is just a normal human. though, his wife is the one who is a witch, which she passed her powers onto my mother.” he reminded you.

it all made sense now. the unfamiliar aura that gnawed in the back of your mind, the countless times of you wondering if your eyes were playing tricks on you from the fox tattoo on his arm, the way he apparated in thin air that one time when you wanted to give him his cinnamon rolls, and how you saw the exact fox popping up often in your dreams.. things finally fell into place.

“god, the things that are happening..” you groaned, resting your forehead on the faux marble table of yours.

wooyoung could only laugh, and turned his head to the side as he watched leo and yuki chasing each other around the bakery. he felt the weight on his shoulders slowly being lifted off. relief was what he was feeling, relieved that he at least found someone the same as he was. his eyebrow quirked up once you suddenly straightened up in your seat, a look of realisation hitting you.

“you mentioned how the fo-”

“yuki.” he corrected.

“right, yuki, would visit someone in their dreams right? and that someone is someone you were thinking about before you slept?” you said, wooyoung nodding his head in confirmation.

“...does that mean you were thinking about me?” you asked.

wooyoung choked on his spit, the apples on his cheeks turning into a faint shade of pink before abruptly standing up from his seat, promptly calling yuki, who immediately scrambled up to the male and spun around. a bright light shone briefly before it disappeared, going back to being wooyoung’s tattoo on his arm.

“i-i need to head home, i’ll see you tomorrow, y/n!” he announced, making his way out of the bakery.

“wooyoung, wait!” you tried to catch him but like a little while ago, he was quick to apparate away.

❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀

“well, aren’t you glad that you finally found another witch friend, my child?” your mother said.

you had decided to conjure up the mirror like portal once again, you wanted to talk to your parents about what you had just recently discovered. no, you had to talk to them. though, you were relieved that you had found a fellow witch in town, the idea of being caught still scared you.

“with how he found out about you, i really should say you need to be careful next time, y/n.” your father said.

despite the strictness laced in his tone, he was genuinely concerned about your safety. and he was right, someone could have easily found out. you had to admit that it was your fault for letting the broom move by itself, thinking that no one would have walked in since, well, it was your own kitchen. your head hung low as you emitted a groan, hands coming up to rub your face. you were thankful that it was wooyoung who had found out, a fellow witch just like you.

“i think that also solves the little mystery revolving around the boy, doesn’t it, my dear?” your mother said. you could only nod your head, lifting your head to send your parents a little smile.

“i trust that these things won’t happen again, y/n?” your father added.

“of course, father. i will be more careful next time.” your parents’ expression softened up at your small promise before the light around the mirror had once again grow dim, indicating that you needed to finish your conversation soon.

“do tell me how the progress goes between the two of you, y/n.” your mother teased, effectively making your cheeks heat up before whining out of protest.

“mother!”

with one hearty laugh coming from both of your parents, along with a final wave of the night, you knew what was coming up next. shutting your eyes, the ringing grew loud in your ear before it finally died down, letting the silent night to envelope around you and leo, who was already fast asleep next to your legs. rolling your eyes, you gently picked him up in your arms along with your cauldron and spellbook before making your way back to your cottage.

your eyes were staring at your reflection through your dresser’s mirror while brushing your hair, rewinding the events that had occurred earlier in your bakery, and the hasty explanation wooyoung had mentioned once he sat the both of you down. but.. a particular fact lingered in your mind.

‘what exactly do i have to do in your mind, wooyoung?’ you thought.

‘for the last time, go the hell to sleep. your mind is too loud.’ ah, of course, the one and only grouch just had to interrupt.

what a sourpuss.

with a shake of your head, you switched off the lights and made yourself comfortable in your bed before finally getting that much needed sleep.

❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀

“miss, can i, can i buy a cake? it’s for my mom, it’s her birthday today!”

your eyes looked down at the chubby hand sliding the crumpled up dollar bills along with the shining coins on top of your counter, making the conclusion it had been kept for quite a while now.

standing in front of your counter (though you had to lean a little to have a good look at the child), it was the little girl from the very first day of you opening up your little bakery, pigtails and all. you bit down on your lower lip, heart clenching at the sight of her puppy-ish eyes. you didn’t have the heart to tell her that she had enough money to buy a whole cake. instead, you knelt down to her height and asked if she knew what her mother’s favourite treat in the bakery was.

“oh, she loved your mini chocolate croissants!” the girl chimed, pigtails bouncing as she excitedly hopped in place.

“alright, how about i give you the croissants instead?” you offered.

with a gentle smile, and a pat on her head, you straightened up and rushed around the bakery to pack the croissants into the little box, not forgetting the cat sticker to seal the little opening so it wouldn’t fall. you also placed the box into a white paper bag so the treats won’t easily fall out of the girl’s hands.

a soft cheer made its way out of the girl’s lips, taking the bag in her chubby hands before thanking you as she made her way out of the bakery. following the retreating figure, it was only then you noticed a certain raven haired male leaning against the doorway with two cups of coffee in his hands.

it had been a few days after the incident in the very back of your kitchen, you were awkward and cautious during the next day of meeting but wooyoung never gave up in trying to convince you that everything was fine, and that no one would find out about the both of your identities. as per usual, he would always bring you your coffee whenever it was your break time. sometimes, you would even sneak a little incantation in his cinnamon rolls to make his day a little better whenever you saw how his face held a frustrated expression, most likely dealing with a stubborn customer.

and ever since then, wooyoung was willing to wait for you to close up your bakery, yuki playing with leo. it was a surprise that leo was actually getting along with the fox considering how the two were polar opposites of each other, both physical and personality wise. he even managed to communicate through wooyoung’s mind now, sometimes having wooyoung laugh out loud from the cat’s snarky comments.

“one iced latte for our lady.” he grinned, handing you the cup of said drink, you gratefully taking it in your hands.

“our?” you chuckled. in response, wooyoung merely eyed his arm where yuki was spinning in circles.

you couldn’t help but coo at the snow fox, whispering softly underneath your breath so only you and wooyoung could hear, “hi there, yuki.”

“i was wondering..” wooyoung suddenly started, making you look up, tilting your head as you urged for him to continue.

“do you wanna go somewhere? after you close up, i mean.” wooyoung asked.

now that he mentioned, you had never really explored much of the town as of late considering how you would busy yourself in the bakery, and only went straight at home so you could finally rest or work on your spells and incantations (mostly conjuration spells). with a wide smile, you nodded your head.

“i don’t see why not. a little break from the bakery won’t hurt.” you chuckled.

the sheepish grin had appeared itself over wooyoung’s lips, making the apples of his cheeks grow fuller by the action. you won’t lie, it is an endearing sight.

‘i heard that.’ came leo’s voice, causing you to snap your gaze on him while wooyoung confusedly looked over at the cat who was busy licking his paw.

“what is he talking about?” the boy asked.

your cheeks flushed a faint shade of crimson after hearing the question as you waved a hand in a dismissive manner, mentioning how it was just random thought you had.

‘a random thought thinking that he has a.. ‘cute’ smile, young lady?’ leo snickered.

you could only glare at the feline while wooyoung snapped his gaze from the cat to you, the confused expression on his face melting away and instead, was replaced with a sly grin.

“you think it’s a cute smile, huh?” he teased, causing you to groan before grabbing your broom.

cue a loud yowl coming from the cat as you chased the cat around while wooyoung laughed his high pitched laugh at the entertaining sight.

“i guess both our companions know how to embarrass us.” he grinned, immediately catching you in his arms as you were about to run past him once again.

“i swear, one of these days i’m gonna turn that cat into a dog instead.” you mumbled.

it was only when wooyoung’s cologne wafting into your nose had your attention, looking up once you had calmed down from the brief chasing around. sure, you had always smelled wooyoung’s cologne whenever he stopped by but being so close to him like this, almost made you never want to leave his arms. it was if you were slowly growing intoxicated by his scent.

“y/n?” wooyoung called.

“huh?” you blinked, breaking out of the trance.

“i said i needed to go back to the coffee house so i’ll see you later?” he asked once again, amused at the slight dazed look glossing over your irises.

realising what he meant, you immediately pulled away from the embrace, almost whining at the loss of warmth around your frame. hugging the broom close to your chest, you faintly nodded.

“yeah, i’ll see you later, wooyoung.” you waved as the male made his way out after bidding goodbye, though not without sending a wink at your way.

“don’t miss my smile too much, miss baker.”

“jung wooyoung!”

❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀

“and that’s the last of them!” you huffed, placing the clean tray into the many racks.

with both hands on your hips, your eyes glanced around the kitchen to make sure there weren’t dirty trays or utensils in your kitchen. once satisfied, you untied your apron and hung it over the little coat rack in the corner before heading out, making sure you didn’t forget your keys. from the last specks of crimson painting the nearly black sky, the night was about to greet you once again.

true to his word, wooyoung was already waiting for you. he sent you his bright and cheeky grin upon seeing your figure walking out of the bakery, making quick strides to stand next to you as you locked the main entrance of the bakery. once he saw that you were done he held out his arm, glancing at both you and leo who, as usual, rested on your shoulders. sometimes he wondered how your back doesn't hurt from the amount of times leo would climb on you.

“ready to go?” wooyoung asked, looking down at you. with a link of your arm around his, you nodded.

though what happened next, nearly made you want to cling onto the male next to you. you had expected for a walk in the park or something similar. not apparating into thin air and quickly arriving at - you squinted around before realising where you were, the town’s old watchtower. the balcony of the watchtower to be more specific. though, no one has ever set foot here in over three years now since the town had a new one on the other side.

with the way you were practically hugging wooyoung’s arm, he made a short conclusion that this must have been your first time doing so, or rather, you not being used to it. leo was already off of your shoulders, calmly licking his paw as he balanced himself on top of the railing. yuki, on the other hand, was napping so she didn’t join leo this time. gently placing his hands on your shoulders, wooyoung leaned his face down to look at your face, concern painting over his own features.

“you okay?” he asked.

“s-sorry, i was just not expecting that, is all.” you mumbled, giving him an embarrassed smile from the sudden confession. once you were sure you were steady on your feet, your gentle eyes stared at the scenery from the balcony.

you knew that the town was beautiful, but seeing the town where most of the lights were turned on along with the moonlight illuminating the calm waters of the sea right next to it, the stars shining ever so brightly on the sky’s dark canvas. the scenery was absolutely breathtaking. once the night breeze brushed against your skin, the strands of your hair slowly dancing to their own rhythm from the gentle blow of the wind, you shut your eyes and took a deep breath. instantly, the smell of the ocean filled your senses, making a soft smile to curl itself over your soft petals.

wooyoung, who was leaning against the doorway of the entrance, couldn't help but admire the way the moonlight kissed your skin, the night breeze blowing against your strands, and the peaceful expression you held. over the months of getting to know you, he somehow started to develop feelings for you.

how could he not when you looked at peace in your kitchen baking the treats whenever he stopped by? how could he not when your expression brightens every time a customer complimented your treats? how could he not when soft laugh that sounded so melodic in his ears whenever he told his lame jokes or his embarrassing childhood stories. no, this was not some kind of puppy love or a short crush.

jung wooyoung has fallen for you.

he had spent nights trying to think of other things and not you before falling asleep, knowing how suspicious you would get if yuki frequently visited your dreams. sometimes he would even charmed your drink of the day to give you an extra burst of energy to get through the remaining hours of your day after seeing the tired look on your face. he knew that you would slip the little happiness potion into his cinnamon rolls yet could only pretend that he didn’t know, not wanting you to ever stop.

taking his eyes away from you briefly, wooyoung looked down at the palms of his hands before his eyelids fluttered shut. his lips moved as a hushed chant left his lips, slowly a faint pink smoke started to form on his palms but he was not done. half lidded eyes stared at the smoke in his hands before they were clasped together. with pursed lips, wooyoung gently blew into his hands.

there, laid a single rose in his previously empty hands. looking up at you, who was still occupied by the night view of the town, he cleared his throat, calling your name to catch your attention.

the surprise expression on your face upon seeing the rose in his hand was enough to make the male release a low laugh, walking over to where you stood. with the rose being held out, wooyoung stared at your face.

“wooyoung, what’s this?” you inquired, though you could feel the heat rising to your cheeks.

like wooyoung, you had your fair share of sleepless nights as well. but rather than thinking of other things, the boy in front of you managed to crawl into your mind every now and then, sometimes you would even find yourself zoning out while stirring whatever concoction you wanted to create, only snapping out of it once leo had called your attention or swatted at your hand.

before you could even realise it, you developed feelings for the raven haired male as well.

how could you not when he loves making you flustered by watching you with gentle eyes as you bake? how could you not when he would come by your bakery to give you your coffee while the two of you talked about the current highlight of your days during break time? how could you not when he would cheekily sprinkle a tiny bit of flour in your hair by levitating the packet above your head just to gain your attention? how could you not when his laughter sounded so endearing?

you, too, had fallen for jung wooyoung.

“from the months of meeting and getting to know you, i knew you had something that intrigued me. i have always thought that you were a normal townsperson, never a fellow witch like me.” wooyoung started, face perking up as soon as he saw the way you playfully grimaced after remembering the time he had found out your true identity.

“before i know it, the intriguing feeling was replaced with admiration, thinking i only admired how you managed to keep a calm demeanour whenever you had to face a stubborn customer, unlike me. but i was wrong.” he trailed off, feeling his heart beating fast as his words were caught in his throat.

as an attempt for him to calm down, you silently reached out for his free hand and laced your fingers in his. your reassuring smile was enough to let him know that he could take his time, gathering his words. once ready, wooyoung gave your hand a gentle squeeze as he continued.

“the nights spent thinking about you, having our own little break together, and seeing you walk through the doors of the coffee house just to give me the cinnamon rolls… i knew that i have fallen for you.” he curled a stray strand of hair behind your ears as his warm irises stared into your own, letting his hand resting against your cheek.

“so, y/n l/n..” he called out your name, making your heart beat rapidly in your chest.

“will you be mine?”

you didn’t answer right away, merely wrapping your arms around wooyoung’s neck as the corners of your lips stretched themselves into a huge grin, nodding your head. “yes, a million times yes.”

laughing out of pure relief, wooyoung hugged you tightly against his frame, your chin resting on top of his shoulder as the two of you stayed in each other’s arms, slightly swaying in place. it was when he pulled away that made you look up, your faces mere inches away.

“may i kiss you?” he asked softly, eyes trained on your brims.

“you may.” you whispered in return.

the two of you stared at each other for a few seconds, slowly feeling your faces drawing closer. closer, and closer, until the gap was finally closed with your lips pressing his own. he tasted like coffee, while wooyoung could make out the faint taste of cinnamon on your lips. his hand slowly came up to cup against your nape, moving your lips together in a slow yet synchronised dance. it seemed that everything else didn’t matter as the both of you were in your own world.

to wooyoung, this was better than any potion you had snuck in his cinnamon rolls.

❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀

“babe, where did you put the new coffee mugs?” wooyoung called out, looking through the cabinets.

“ah, i washed them. i thought that was what you wanted to do as soon as they arrived.” you said, poking your head out from the kitchen.

it had been a few months that the two of you had finally gotten together. before you know it, your first anniversary is just a week away! during the first couple of months, the two of you went on dates frequently. it was to be expected considering the two of you would see each other on the daily. sometimes you would grow embarrassing from the flirty winks being sent at your way by the male, no matter how long you had known him.

just recently, or rather, a couple of days ago. the two of you had decided to sell off your bakery and instead, started your own shared coffee house together in wooyoung’s place, now naming the place as ‘utopia’. he was in charge of the coffee orders while you were busy with your pastries. sometimes, the both of you would teasingly cast harmless jinxes on each other as you worked, creating a small war that consists of spells and potions. of course, the two of you were careful to not let anyone else see it.

occasionally, the male would stay over at your cottage. the first time he visited, he was gushing at almost everything in your place. even admiring how peaceful the place was whenever night falls. the frequent visits only met that wooyoung had an excuse to give you his shirts or sweaters, saying how you looked absolutely adorable in his clothes. it was when your closet was almost full of his clothes that the two of you had decided to just live together in the small cottage of yours.

to your surprise, he had insisted on wanting to see your parents. which you let him do so. once the male and your parents had met, your mother was delighted to have finally met him while your father kept a stern act, causing your mother to whisper that he should be nice. of course, with the amount of times wooyoung would talk to your parents (which was whenever he stayed the night), your father slowly opened up and would even crack jokes with wooyoung.

knowing that the cottage was a safe haven for you, wooyoung would often teach you about the conjuration spells along with enchanting. he had noticed the awed expression on your face every time yuki had switched back into her tattooed form before asking whether you wanted a tattoo as well. your reaction of mentioning how you were scared of needles amused him, you glaring at him in a sulky manner in response. without much thought, wooyoung reassured you that you didn’t need needles for this.

so here you are, standing next to wooyoung greeting the customers that walked into the coffee house before taking orders, the tattoo that consisted of your favourite flowers adorned your wrist, making it look like a makeshift bracelet. occasionally, the flowers would change into a flower following your emotions.

“love, what do you wanna do for our anniversary?” wooyoung asked, wrapping his arms around your waist and pressed his lips on your shoulder.

you couldn’t help but to emit a light chuckle turning your head slightly to give his cheek a kiss, humming in thought. “dinner at the cottage, how does that sound?”

nodding at the suggestion, wooyoung grinned, eyes twinkling with excitement. “sounds good to me.”

with a final kiss on the tip of your nose, your lover unwrapped his arms to greet another customer who had walked inside the coffee house, you immediately walked to stand next to him.

you were, no, are content. you are content living in a small cottage with your lover, you are content working in a coffee house with wooyoung, you are content with everything life has to offer as long as you are with jung wooyoung.

#ateez #ateez writing #ateez fanfic #ateez au #ateez scenarios #ateez imagines #ateez fluff #ateez reactions #ateez reader insert #ateez x reader #ateez fantasy au #ateez oneshot #ateez wooyoung #jung wooyoung #jung wooyoung scenarios #kpop #kpop scenarios #kpop imagines #colly's writings

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rosie-moons · 3 years

Text

Beauty and the Beast 1 {} Tale as Old as Time || myg

~Pairing: worstboyfriendever!yoongi x travelenthusiast!reader

~Genre: Angst with a sprinkle of fluff

~Word Count: 3.4k

~Warnings: yoongi being the worst boyfriend 😥😥😥, reader crying 😔😔😔, very cliche scenes, a breakup (not the major part though), yoongi crying 😢😢😢, yoongi cheating on reader (YOONGI I SWORE IF YOU HURT OUR OC LIKE THIS I WOULD PUNCH YOU TILL YOU BLEED but you’re saved for the sake of this story 😡😡😡), reader being too forgiving, swearing

~A/N: well. i just had to give you guys angst after dp, didn't i? i know yoongi's stupid in here but pls don't get mad at him bc he's my bb and i love him too much 🥺. also HOMOPHOBES STAY AWAY, CHOHEE AND NARI ARE MY BABES AND I'LL PROTECT THEM NO MATTER WHAT!

~''~

In your relationship, Yoongi had always been the beast.

Missing dates, drinking at the bar and getting wasted almost every night, overall just fucking around… it was common sense that this was what boyfriends were supposed to do, right?

“Right.” was what you always thought- that boys were uncaring and stupid and undeserving of any love.

Well, any love except for yours.

Somehow, Yoongi always thought that you didn't deserve him, that you were the ugly, cold-hearted beast, that you were supposed to love him without anything in return.

And you always thought he was right; forgiving him after his sobbing apologies again and again, taking care of him after drunken nights again and again, convincing yourself that he really did love you again and again- until you decided this couldn’t go on.

No, you had a life outside of Yoongi.

You had dreams.

You had friends, a good social life, a whole group of boys who’d give you the universe if it meant you could be with them.

Why did you choose Yoongi though?

Why not any of those boys, some of whom were more attractive, more caring, treated you better?

~’’~

“Soulmates,” your best friend Nari huffed, turning her head to look at you. You were having a long-anticipated spa night together, cool cucumber slices resting on your tired eyes and some sort of coconut scented oatmeal mush plastered over your face. “You gotta stop believing in that shit, Y/N.”

You sighed.

“I’m trying, okay? It’s just that… I think… I think believing that one day someone will love you for eternity is better than living every day in heartache. At least it gives you hope, a reason to smile, I guess. Don’t you think so too?”

Nari paused for a minute, nodding subtly as she chowed on a cucumber slice. “Now that I think about it, I guess you’re right…”

You smiled, proud that you’d convinced her.

“...but nah, I still think you should face reality more than your imagination, you really have your head up in the clouds too much. All those fairytales- you know why they’re called fairytales and not realistic tales or something? Because they’re just to lull kids to sleep, all that perfect romance doesn’t exist,” her expression softened. “Hey, I really didn't mean to upset you... I was just- are you thinking about him again?”

You shut your eyes tightly, trying to stop the overflow of tears threatening to spill out. “I… no, I’m not. I just… I don’t…”

“Hey, Y/N, it’s alright…” She immediately scrambled off her massage chair, coming over to yours and pulling you into her arms. “He’s a stupid fucker who doesn’t deserve you. There’s so many good guys who’ll die to be with you, Y/N, I’m sure even Seventeen’s Mingyu would date you if you gave him a chance. Really!”

You sniffled, burying your face in your friend’s chest. “Not everyone’s obsessed with Seventeen like you, Nari.”

“Well,” She hmph’ed. “Are there any K-pop groups you like, then?”

“No.”

“How about TXT? Enhypen? Astro? You like none of them?”

“Enhypen’s okay, I guess…”

“There we go! Okay, okay, who’s your favorite member?”

“The one with the really nice smile.”

“All of them have nice smiles, Y/N. Do you know his name?”

“Uh… Sun-something. I think his last name is Kim.”

“Sunoo? You like Sunoo? OMG! OMG! MY BEST FRIEND LIKES SUNOO!” Nari jumps off the massage chair, making “whoop whoop” noises as she dances across the spa room.

A beautiful raven-haired spa attendant creaks open the door, stepping in. “Hello, ladies. I hope you’re enjoying your evening. I just heard… something, and was wondering if you’re doing okay.”

Nari freezes with her left foot still in the air, arms bent in an awkward position. She coughs, blushing as she scrambled to a standing position. “Yes, um, we’re doing fine. Thank you, er…” Her eyes flicker down to the attendant’s nametag, “Chohee ♥” scribbled in pretty cursive handwriting. “...Chohee.”

You flashed your signature wide smile, giving her a thumbs up. “Yep! Nari just gets excited easily, everything’s okay!”

She smiles back, pretty pink lips devoid of any lip gloss or lipstick. “Alright, then. Call me if you need anything!”

“Wait!” Nari calls after her as she proceeds to shut the door. “How are we supposed to call you if we don’t have your number?”

Chohee laughs awkwardly. “Oh… haha… I meant, like, physically call me, not, like, with a phone… haha… but… I mean… like...” She takes a page from the tiny notebook in her pocket, writing something on it. She hands it over to Nari. “Here’s my number, just don’t… spam me… or anything… um…” She clears her throat. “I hope we can… be… friends… or… something…”

Nari smiles shyly, accepting the paper. “Yeah… thanks, Chohee. Um, it was great meeting you…”

They giggle dumbly together before a shrill “CHOHEE! WE HAVE CUSTOMERS WAITING, YOU KNOW!” interrupts the glassy moment. Chohee immediately jumps back into professionalism, clearing her throat. “Sorry, uh… Nari…? Was that it?”

Nari nods.

“Yeah. Nari. Um, I have to go…”

“Oh, we shouldn’t be interrupting your work, should we?” She laughs. “Thanks for… uh… everything…”

“No problem.” They giggle again. “I really have to get going though… Bye.”

“Bye, Chohee.”

“CHOHEE SEO! IF YOU DON’T GET YOUR BUTT OVER HERE NOW YOU’RE FIRED! DO YOU HEAR ME?”

Chohee’s eyes widen. “Oop, gotta go. Bye!” She runs off, Nari yelling one last ��BYE!” as she waves.

When she finally closes the door and meets your eyes, she’s practically jumping up and down, heated cheeks glowing a fiery red.

You quirk an eyebrow. “Now do you believe in fairytale love?”

She coughs, picking at a scratchy stud on her arm. “I… no… I mean… maybe…”

You clap your hands once, grinning as you watch your friend’s face burn hotter. “Well, would you look at that! For once, I’m not the one that’s crazily in love and stupidly giddy!”

“Stop, Y/N!” She whines, playfully hitting your arm. “And plus, um, our face masks are hardening. It’s time to wash them off. I’m going to the bathroom. Um. Bye!”

And she’s taking off towards the bathroom, the sound of running water jolting you from your thoughts about… him.

Yoongi.

You bite your lip, wondering how pathetic you could possibly be. He doesn’t love you. He probably has a girlfriend and is about to get engaged. He probably doesn’t even remember you.

You look up at the blinding white ceiling, the soothing forest sounds playing from the speaker you forgot about now your only source of comfort.

Because the last two were “probably”’s, but the first one was a fact- Yoongi didn’t love you, and he never did.

~’’~

“For the last time, Nari, I’m 100% sure she likes you back. Just text her, tell her to meet up with you, confess at some cute caf-”

“No, Y/N! You don’t get it, I’m, like, really, really sure she likes the coffee shop server we met the other day, they were practically making out and- oh god, don’t even remind me about the lovey dovey googly eyes!” Nari stomps her foot childishly as you sigh for the upteenth time.

“Nari, just-” Your eyes widen, a brilliant yet sneaky-ish idea popping into your head. “Actually, it’s okay if you don’t want to just yet. I advise you to go take a shower though, wouldn’t want to be stinky, right?”

“But I’m not going anywhere special-”

“HAHAHAHAHA it doesn’t matter HAHAHAHA just go, go take a shower, go go go right now!”

“You’re acting weird…”

“HAHAHAHA am I now?”

“Um. Yeah. Alright. I’ll go shower. Bye.”

“BYE!”

“You’re being very enthusiastic.”

“Am I?”

“Yeah… bye though.”

It was an ordinary Saturday morning with Nari lounging at your place, complaining that Chohee wasn’t paying attention to her. So you’d tried to convince her to confess- which didn’t work, by the way.

Anyway, with Nari now in the shower and screaming along to “Chandelier” by Sia, you were ready to launch your plan into action.

Swiping her phone off the counter, you typed in the password (which she’d told you, as you told her yours as well) as fast as your glittery fake nailed thumbs could manage, plastic click-clacking against the oil-smudged screen. Nari had a habit of never washing her hands before texting, even after some good ol’ cheetos or fried chicken.

You click on the Textalk app and swipe down until you find Chohee’s contact (written “Chohee baby ♥❦✶⭑").

10:42 am

Nari Lee said: hey chohee :) u there? Chohee baby ♥❦✶⭑ said: nari Chohee baby ♥❦✶⭑ said: r u ok Nari Lee said: of course im ok :D Chohee baby ♥❦✶⭑ said: O-o hmm but u never use emoticons Nari Lee said: oh i just found out that i like them haha

10:43 am

Chohee baby ♥❦✶⭑ said: *raises eyebrow* Chohee baby ♥❦✶⭑ said: ok yeah im here, wassup? Nari Lee said: so… i was just wondering if ur free today for lunch, i have something to say to u Chohee baby ♥❦✶⭑ said: oh yeah ofc! where?

10:44 am

Nari Lee said: um how about magnolia cafe? @12? Chohee baby ♥❦✶⭑ said: awesome! ill be there <3 Nari Lee said: sweet!

~’’~

“So…” You say, casually sliding into Nari’s room. She’s in a fluffy white bathrobe, brushing her hair and singing to herself. “What do you say for lunch at the Magnolia Cafe today?”

She shrugs. “Why not? I just showered, anyway.”

You smirk evilly. “Great! Make sure to put on some makeup and wear something nice.”

“Got it!”

~’’~

“Y/N!” Nari whisper-yells to you. “What in the name of my fuckin’ soggy underwear is Chohee doing here?!”

You hum, unbothered, as you skim over the menu. “How should I know? Anyway, I’m going to order some brunch. How about you?”

“Y/N! Ugh, shut the fuck up, I’m having a life threatening crisis right now! And why is she looking at me? And waving?”

You just smirk, shrugging. “Oops, gotta use the toilet. Bye!” You then dash off towards an empty table right behind theirs, wanting to laugh like a commando mad scientist. Your plan was done, and now it’s just time to see if it works.

Chohee walks over to Nari, and you see her visibly gulp. “Hey, Nari! You said there was something important you wanted to say to me?”

“Uh… I don’t… no? I don’t have anything to say?”

“Oh? Ah, I see. You’re making it suspenseful. Haha, I think I’ve had enough suspense. Spill!”

“Um… I like omelets?”

“What?”

“I… I like plants?”

“Excuse me?”

“Uh, I like you- WHAT AM I SAYING?!” Nari’s hand flies up to cover her mouth. Chohee furrows her brows.

“You… like me? Like, like like me? As more than a friend?”

“I-”

Chohee leans over the table and kisses her full on the lips, the sight so endearing you chuck out your phone and snap 18 photos. When they separate, Chohee’s grinning, Nari’s face a dark crimson and her bottom lip trembling. She touches it.

“You… kissed… me…”

“Mhm.”

“So does that mean-”

“I’d love to go out with you, Nari.”

And they’re giggling again.

~’’~

“HAVE A SAFE TRIP!!” Nari and Chohee call after you for the 26th time, waving like maniacs. You smile.

“I WILL!”

This was going to be the most exciting 2 weeks of your lifetime- you were going to Italy.

Italy.

~’’~

The small coffee shop is cute, light Italian jazz music playing in the background. The wooden walls are adorned with pictures of the owner’s family, the sweet smell of coffee beans drifting in the air.

To put it simply, it’s perfect.

Perfect for an exhausted coffee lover like you.

“A latte, please-” You pause when the server furrows his brow.

“You… eh… wan’ coffee wit’ milk, no? Not jus’ milk?”

“I mean, um…” You immediately pull up your phone and type into Google Translate. “... caffe latte.”

He nods. “Non c’e problema!” And a minute later, your latte is in your hands, the delicious smell wafting up your nostrils.

You sit down on a cushioned seat, marveling at the decorations and how cozy and warm it makes you feel. Taking a sip of your drink, you smile.

The moment is peaceful and happy, the chatter of the other customers fading in your ears as you just smile. No one to interrupt your daydreaming, no one to come over and call your name-

“Y/N?”

Your eyes shoot up, a familiar pair of cat-like ones staring at you. His hair is black as night, swept carelessly against his perfect forehead. His cute pink lips are jutted out in a tiny pout, pale moonlight skin practically shining. He’s ethereal, and hasn’t changed one bit.

“Y/N?” He says again, tilting his head slightly.

“O-oh. Um. Hey, Y-Yoongi, um, didn’t expect to see you here…” You laugh nervously, scratching the back of your head.

He laughs too, sitting down in the seat opposite yours with a black espresso in his hands. “Yeah, I found a job here. You?”

“I’m on vacation.”

“Cool.”

You stare at each other, having nothing to say. It’s like you want to stretch this moment out forever, stretch it until it erases all the horrible things he said and did to you.

He speaks again. “How long has it been?”

“What?”

He closes his eyes, clasping the mug between his hands tightly. “How-how long has it been- since I last saw you?”

You look down at your lap. “2 years.”

Silence.

“I’m sorry, Y/N.”

Your eyes start to wet, a lone tear slipping past your eyelids. There was no barrier now, more droplets following the first one’s lead and cascading down your cheek. “Stop.”

He doesn’t stop, instead choosing to nab at your heartstrings with more words. “I’m so sorry, I only realized how bad I fucked up when you left… I never stopped thinking about you, Y/N, I thought about you every fucking day-”

“Stop it now-”

“And I realized that I love you more than anything, that you were the treasure I held onto without even knowing I valued you that much. Why do you think I chose to come to Italy? Because I knew it was always your dream to visit here, and I hoped I would run into you somehow. I lived like that, in heartbreak and hope and desperate love and whatever the fuck else every single day, just praying you’d forgive me, praying that you’d come here and tell me that you still love me-”

“Yoongi.” You stand up, slamming the table. Your chest is heaving, breathing heavily as you try to take in everything that he said. “Stop. It. Stop saying sorry. “Sorry.” So what? Sorry won’t help anything, I don’t love you and we are over. In fact, there is not even a “we” anymore. You are you and I am me, completely separate, all ties cut, whatever you want to call it.”

“Y/N-” Yoongi’s voice is desperate, those forlorn eyes swimming with melancholy. You cut him off.

“Shut up, Yoongi!” His lip trembles, looking up at you. You feel a pang of guilt, but throw it away along with all your other feelings. Everyone at the coffee shop is looking at you two, the server mumbling something.

You don’t care.

No, you don’t care about anything.

Not about how much you missed him, how much your heart ached, how much you wanted to just fling yourself into his arms and kiss him- convinced he was a changed man.

Not about how he was pleading you right now, fat droplets rolling down his blanched cheeks as he whispered “I love you”’s over and over again.

Not about how the coffee shop server was hurriedly jogging towards you, incomprehensible Italian filling the air.

This was supposed to be a safe place.

The sweet scent and lulling conversations you fell in love with just moments ago, replaced with bitter words and the sound of tears.

You don't care.

Why are you crying, then? Why are those salty droplets cascading down your face? Why are you fighting so hard between your heart and your brain, trying to decide which to listen to?

Should you take him back, act like nothing has happened like your heart tells you to? Or should you give him the ignorance he deserves, leave the coffee shop and try to forget about this whole catastrophe like your brain says?

"Do you love him? Yes, you do. So choose me, your heart."

"Choose me, Y/N, your brain. I'm telling you to be rational."

You shut your heart out, brain taking over control. Yoongi deserves this. This of indifference, apatheticness, maybe even hatred.

“I don't love you, Yoongi.”

And you were out.

~''~

That night in your hotel room, you cry and cry and cry until the familiar “ding a ling ding a ling ding a ling ding dong” of a Textalk video call wakes you up from your thoughts.

You pick up, wiping all your tears until there is no trace of them left. “H-hey, Nari,” You hiccuped.

“Y/N, what is going on?” Nari’s eyebrows are furrowed as she tries to read your face. “It’s the first day of your dream vacation and you’re crying? Tell me what happened, please.”

“Yeah, you don’t look too good…” Chohee chimes in, sticking her head into the screen. “Don’t tell me you were robbed or something? Oh, no. No no no no. Please let it not be that.”

You smile halfheartedly, trying to change the subject. “Hey, Chohee. Staying the night?”

She nods, concern still painted over her face. “Mhm. But that’s not important, can you please just tell us what happened? It’s okay if it’s something small or stupid, we’re your friends and we’ll be here for you no matter what. We’re just… really concerned, and-”

“Yoongi.” Nari says suddenly, eyes wide.

“W-what? Y-Yoongi? What- what about him? I-I mean, I d-didn’t run into him, I-I’m just a-asking…” Your eyes are wider than cantaloupes, praying she wasn’t some psychic and had mystical powers or whatever.

She sits up from her previous lying-on-her-stomach position abruptly, looking at your stunned state. “Yoongi… do you remember he said he always wanted to visit Italy? He… was he there? Did you run into him?”

You are unable to speak, stuttering as your lip trembles. “Y-yes.”

Chohee and Nari both scream.

“THE WHAT?!”

“YOU RAN INTO YOONGI?!”

“Guys!” You yell, trying to somewhat calm them down (although you needed calming down yourself, too). “Stop! It wasn’t much, okay? Just- just some… talking, and then I left! That’s all!”

They look at each other, not sure whether to believe your explanation or not. Chohee opens her mouth a few times, as though pondering if she should speak or not- and no words come out.

“Really!” You exclaim, trying to convince them. You throw your hands up into the air for exaggeration, trying your hardest to look like you’re telling the truth. “We were like, um, best friends! Like nothing happened! And the coffee server didn’t come and shoo us out! He didn’t! And Yoongi didn’t cry or apologize or anything!”

Nari sighs. “Look, Y/N. I’m only saying I believe you because if I don’t you’ll bug me forever. But seriously, as your best friends, Chohee and I hereby promise to smack Yoongi in the face and shove skunk poop up his pretty nose. Right?” she looks at Chohee expectantly.

Chohee nods. “Yep. And don’t forget about the eating facial cream and drowning in turnip juice part. Y/N, I don’t care who it is, but if they dare to hurt you I will not hesitate to knock their teeth out.”

“If they even dare to insult you in any way, I’ll help Chohee knock their teeth out. I'll do most of the work, obviously, since... actually…” Nari pauses, biting her lip as she thinks. “Maybe, if it’s Mingyu that insults you, I’ll let him go…”

Chohee smacks her arm, rolling her eyes as Nari yelling a loud “what was that for?”. “For heaven’s sake, Nari! That totally ruined the moment.”

Nari shrugs, shooting Chohee a glare. “What, are we shooting a drama or something?”

You smile, looking down into your lap as your two friends bicker and give each other friendly smacks.

Maybe, just maybe, this world wasn’t unfair to you after all- you found happiness outside of Yoongi and the world of romance.

Maybe.

~''~

Okay. I did okay with the ending, right???? I did okay with the plot, right???? I didn't make Yoongi too horrible, right????

Right.

Okay.

Welp, anyway, remember to check my blog for updates on when part 2 is coming!

-*+ Rose +*-

#yoongi angst #yoongi series #yoongi x you #batb yoongi #bts angst #bts series #bts x you #sniffle sniffle my bbs

3 notes · View notes

tsubaki3192 · 4 years

Text

3. Maidens

[Luck Series, part 3]

[Kitsune! MC x Ikesen Various]

Part 1 | Part 2 |

-----------------

Notes: This is so overdue oh god- Forgive me? xD For those who don’t know, this is my long Ikesen fic xD

Other notes: this is a repost, bc the other link is broken...

Tagging: @tsuki-no-usagiii @zavannahmj @nuttytani @choi-jiyu

Please let me know if you want to be (Un)tagged!

----------------------------------------

Nobunaga didn’t know what to make of you. Literally. You were strange, open, and yet somehow reserved in your own way.

(But this ‘different’.... He couldn’t say he disliked it.)

He had watched you (from above) interact almost stubbornly with his vassals and chuckled at your responses. You had spoken just loud enough for him to hear, though he did wonder what you had uttered to Masamune. His eye-patched vassal had, after all, guffawed loudly, flushing an impossibly bright red.

(Nope, this was not jealousy. Not at all. You were his, after all...)

And that spectacle you had created in the Audience hall…. He knew well that you were able to speak- He had all his higher-ranked vassal’s to prove him correct after all. Your eyes had been cold, but as he observed you trail Hideyoshi (form still frazzled), your eyes were full of mischief and life.

(But seriously, was there something wrong with him? He was a genius, that was a given, but you made him second-guess himself-)

But as you disappeared into the bathhouse, his eyes wandered away from the sight and to the town of Azuchi below.

My lucky charm, he thought, chuckling to himself, I wonder what kind of luck you’ll bring me….

------------------------

The bathhouse was quiet. Very much so, and you appreciated it. Openly stalking Hideyoshi wasn’t ideal, but he had led you to the bathhouse nonetheless, albeit taking what you thought was an hour to arrive there. And though the silence was welcoming, there remained the lingering sense of loneliness you couldn’t shake off.

(Admittedly however, you were insecure. Though of what exactly, you did not know.)

And before you had even adequately undressed yourself, there was a sharp knock on the wooden beam.

“Lady (Y/N)? May I enter?”

You didn’t reply immediately- or rather, you couldn’t reply immediately, for your inner robe had been partially removed in the preparation for entering the already-warm water. But your hesitation didn’t last long (you didn’t allow it so after all), and you returned the robe to your shoulders hastily, calling out a quiet “Come in,” to the young female outside.

The sliding door opened equally silently, and you watched as the girl (she was quite obviously physically younger than you were) placed the tray she held to the ground and kneel in front of you. With a heave of your breath, you removed the single ornamental chopstick from your hair and allowed the (H/C) colour strands to flow delicately over your shoulders. And exactly like that, you slipped into the warmth of the water.

“Milady,” the girl began, several seconds later, “if you don’t mind me asking, why are still in your undergarments?”

Your eyes, previously shut, flickered opened and revealed their stunning (E/C) colour. The girl, however, gasped and bowed her head, uttering rapid-fire words of apology. Your lips curled upwards into a small smile, before raising your hand and waving her words off.

(Humans never could satisfy their curiousity, and you thought you might as well provide an answer. It was amusing, to say the very least.)

“Please, do not concern yourself: It is merely the idea of privacy I enjoy, that is all.” You paused, blinking slowly, “Though if you do not mind, I would like to know your name?”

The girl appeared surprised for a short moment before raising her head and smiling widely at you.

“Of course! My name is Himiko. I’ve been assigned to be your handmaiden by Lord Nobunaga and Lord Hideyoshi. It’s a pleasure to be in your service, Lady (Y/N).”

You returned the smile kindly (How could you not, when she was so innocent; when her smile was so pretty?), and thanked her; the girl taking the gesture as a sign to approach you. You scanned the tray of goods, eyeing the contents curiously. It was an elaborate gesture of goods, including a single flask of saké, a single sakazuki and a comb. Block soaps of various scents and colours littered the black and red tray, wafting gently to her sensitive nose.

Himiko’s hands were kind on your knotted hair, gently shrugging away the knots that tangled your hair. And the soap that was subsequently slathered through the same damp locks smelt wonderful: Citrus and Jasmine… Or something along those lines anyway.

Minutes passed in silence, save for the slight clinking of the alcohol against the wooden floorboards or the flask. Several minuscule bubbles had found their way into your flask, but you ignored the bitter taste of the soap (...If it could even be called that? The bubbles were flat…) for the burning sensation of the alcohol. Nihonshu, you knew, was neither beer, wine, nor spirit, though it contained nearly just as much alcoholic content as the latter (18% for Nihonshu, you remembered, compared to 20% in spirits).

“Lady (Y/N)-”

“Please,” You began, furrowing your eyebrows through your small smile, “Could you address me by name? It feels almost… strange to be addressed in that manner.”

But words of denial fell from her lips rapidly, uttering something along the lines of “I couldn’t possibly do that!” and “But you’re a guest of Nobunaga-sama’s!”.

And you just sighed. Why does hierarchy exist again?

Your sakazuki had dropped from your fingertips and now lay overturned in the bathwater, it’s colourless components mixing freely with the warm water. Your hand gripped the handmaiden’s wrist loosely, the latter gasping in shock.

“I’m so sorr-”

“Please. Just address me by name, even if it is solely in private. I understand, yet disregard the issues of the hierarchy, so I would truly appreciate it if you would address me by my name.”

Your expression once again softened as she agreed hesitantly. And you released her hand, relaxing once again into the water as she rinsed your hair of the soap suds.

“Lad- Ah, (Y/N)-san, shall I leave you to your bath? Be assured that I will wait outside for you. Just call for me if you need any help.”

Your reply was a quiet nod, fingers freely wading through the water. The gesture of privacy was something you had to thank- Your fur was just as filthy as your hair had been, and maintaining the illusion of an unmarred body was just as annoying. (And to be fair, you suspected it was something you would have to keep up for as long as you remained in this era.)

And as soon as she exited, you willed yourself to your full kitsune form, though your form had been shrunken enough to comfortably fit into the bath (that was to say, the size of a small Arctic fox, given the lengths of your tails…), and began rinsing your fur from the dirt of your last mission back in your true time.

I wonder what will happen in this ‘future’ of mine?

----------

Elsewhere, Hideyoshi collapsed rather ungracefully against the cushion provided by Nobunaga in his tenshu. The said daimyo had called upon his most loyal vassals to accompany him in the tenshu. And despite the said ‘casualness’ Nobunaga had mentioned, the warlords sat in the identical layout to the Audience Chamber. Stiff and formal.

“Is something the matter, Hideyoshi-sama?”

It had been Mitsunari who had questioned his rather unusual behaviour- One the warlords was sure he would never display in front of their Lord, and perhaps themselves. Ieyasu grumbled, expression falling into one of dislike, and something told Masamune he would more than likely be refused treatment.

(Something along the lines of “You need to look after yourself better. Caring for you as a result is a pain.”)

“Perhaps he’s become frail? I’d hate to-”

And only chuckles could leave Mitsuhide’s lips when Nobunaga’s right-hand man gave him a glare as a response. (He had reacted in the exact way the Kitsune-like man had predicted.) But Hideyoshi had sighed immediately afterwards, recognising the statement for what it was- Teasing.

“I’m suddenly exhausted…”

(Secretly, you had been siphoning his physical energy as you had trailed behind him. And it was only his physical energy. You were well aware you could consume his life force if you wanted to, but you didn’t- An indication of your interest to the man, to say the very least.)

Again, a chuckle vibrated through the air, though this time the sound had aroused from their raven-haired lord.

“I would suspect that is the result of my lucky charm?”

Hideyoshi’s eyes landed on his Lord’s lazed form and sighed, nodding his head in agreement.

“It is so.”

Beside him, Ieyasu huffed in response, silently wondering just what she had done to exhaust a warlord whose stamina was much larger than her own. (Silently though, he was slightly amused by the information.) And yet his own green eyes refused to meet Hideyoshi’s own when they turned to him.

“So what are we doing with this Lass?”

If Ieyasu was one for hidden amusement, then Masamune would be the one who expressed it openly. He, too, had chuckled, though his one eye remained fixed outside and at a sakura tree. And when the others followed his line of sight, they found you seated beneath the drifting flower petals eagerly patting-

“Is that Shogetsu?”

“Wasabi?”

Masamune’s pet tiger had seemingly approached you, quickly followed by Wasabi (Ieyasu had suspected his ‘emergency food supply’ was keeping watch over the said tiger). The deer’s head had been laid in your lap as your right hand slid down the fur over her head gently. But the baby tiger swatted at your other hand playfully, nibbling against your finger every once so often when he caught them.

And you- You had a quiet smile over your face. The edges of the deep red kimono had been rolled up to your elbows as you toyed with the tiger in amusement. And you knew, without a doubt, he belonged to Masamune: they were rather similar, after all. (Though just where exactly he had received the tiger was something you simply couldn’t fathom.)

But the warlords just watched your interaction with the maid seated beside you, the latter quietly shying away from the leaping cat in what could only be classified as fear.

---------------

The days passed quietly.

True to your word, you spent the daylight shifting through a cycle of napping, ingesting food (snacks or otherwise) and amusing yourself with the maids and servants the frequented your room for (rather unnecessary) services. Games of Go and various card games lay over the short table in the room, in preparation for the next round- Whatever that new game would be. Rarely did you exit the room; and when you did, it was never to anywhere else than the bathhouse and the toilets (which were almost nothing more than holes in the ground, but whatever works, right?).

Your early evening and nights were spent by the doors facing the garden; your only company being Kitty, Mitsunari’s beloved cat, brought to you by Masamune’s own ‘kitten’. Her fur was soft- Much softer than you imagined, considering Mitsunari’s innate ability to not even look after himself (something you had discovered when you were searching for the castle library the same day you arrived... And to be fair, you suspected it was the work of a maid or the like). The same pile of books (if they could be called that) now lay in a small pile by the door.

(You were itching to return them, but your curiousity on how much longer they would permit your unhealthy behaviour overpowered that will.)

“(Y/N)?”

The gentle voice belonging to Himiko resonated through the door after a sharp knock. But your head had already been turned towards the door expectantly: Days of a single repetitive cycle had proven Pavlov’s theory to be correct, it seemed. (The sun had just appeared over the verandah and an indication for lunch-)

“Himiko? You may enter.”

And truth to be told, there was another scent you had detected. More than likely belonging to Hideyoshi again. The said warlord had hounded you the previous day as well, claiming he was highly concerned for your lack of physical movement and social activity. (And though it was quite the task to remain at a standstill for hours on end, the mere concern he had for you was endearing.)

“Hideyoshi,” you greeted, not bothering to turn back to face him. Your handmaiden gasped, though the warlord only furrowed his eyebrows before quietly shaking his head. You had always been like that whenever he visited and as such, this was nothing new.

“It’s unhealthy to remain cooped up in a room for this many days! Especially for a young lady like you!”

(If only he knew of your true age…)

The mother-like warlord was near furious now (you had quickly learnt of his somewhat short temper-), despite his only few-minutes presence. But you only sighed, gratefully receiving the tea from Himiko with both hands.

“It’s a little different today…”

“Of course! I had Masamune specially make this for you!”

… For the sake of ‘my’ health, is what she heard at the end, though it was not stated by the male in question. His expression had told her all. That was, the intense, watchful eye as she carefully ate, savouring both taste and texture. It was nothing more than salted, grilled salmon alongside a bowl of miso soup, steamed rice and some steamed Sengoku-period vegetables. (Simple, but it did it’s job, you supposed.)

“Hm… Masamune, huh? It’s pretty good.”

And Hideyoshi just sighed, knowing that your stubbornness would not permit his exasperation to affect you (though what he didn’t know was how difficult it was for you to not react… Stubborn or not, you were that sort of person after all…). And he took several deep breaths (you had to be proud of that: You had awoken several nights from the call of “Not again!”, followed by Nobunaga’s deep chuckle) to calm himself down.

“It’s really unhealthy for you to remain cooped up in this room. I hope you’re aware of that.”

He had repeated himself, knowing of the terrible reputation you had built yourself over the past week. And you just frowned. (To be fair, you could honestly care less, but reputation seemed to be everything in this era….)

“I am, though all I have done is follow Nobunaga’s”- Hideyoshi frowned at the lack of respect- “orders. He requested that I be his ‘Lucky Charm’: one that would remain on display… Or so to say.”

Your shoulders raised itself in a slight shrug. It really didn’t matter to you, so long as the drama kept you amused for some time (which, you wished, was long- You always had a knack of boring yourself after some length of time). Hideyoshi could only frown with a million things to say. But before he could even begin, there was a sudden knock on the door following your statement, followed by a call of her nickname.

“Lass?”

Much to your amusement and prediction, the tiger-loving warlord had been waiting patiently outside, alongside the scent of gunpowder- the kitsune-eyed Mitsuhide.

“Oh?” Masamune’s voice began, “Subjected to Hideyoshi’s motherly instincts, are you, princess?”

Deadpanning, you turned towards the voice and narrowed your eyes at him.

(Oh look. A snake.)

“Unfortunately. And hello to you too, Mitsuhide.”

Your handmaiden had turned to bow towards Masamune, but stiffened at the sight of citrine eyes gazing upon yourself. Naturally, the warlords ignored her (quite rude, if you thought about it) and made their way over to your side without the slightest acknowledgement of her presence. Your eyes rolled as you suppressed a light growl, irritated at the sudden accumulation of bodies in your allocated room.

(It wasn’t that the room wasn’t big but both warlords had sat so near, a sudden sense of claustrophobia had overcome you.)

Minutes of silence passed as you quietly consumed the meal. And though Mitsuhide had kept his trained eye upon you, Masamune and Hideyoshi had

“What is it, Mitsuhide? Watching someone eat must be utterly interesting- You keep watching me… Unless you wanted some?”

You snickered to yourself, sarcasm dripping past your lips easily, as Masamune shook his head sadly. He must’ve had known something about the pale warlord-

“We don’t talk about how Mitsuhide eats.”

It was Hideyoshi who had spoken, a sigh dripping from his lips. Your eyes flitted over to meet the fox’s gaze, before rolling them and continuing your meal.

“I’m not sure I’d like to know.”

“Oh how you wound me!”

And you just huffed, rolling your eyes at the mysterious- and dramatic- man. (What a tease he was, and it wasn’t as if you hated it- It was the opposite, really.)

“I’m sure it’s a truly interesting story, but I’m currently eating, so if you don’t mind, I’d like to finish before the chaos from your description begins.”

Your expression formed to one resembling a deadpan as you continued to eat otherwise expressionlessly. And the warlords just stared at you, eyes slightly wider than usual. You could sense their gaze, but you ignored them as you gratefully savoured Masamune’s cooking.

(Like usual though, Mitsuhide had been the first to relax, a chuckle leaving his throat and snapping the others from their stupor. It was highly amusing- or entertaining, for your case.)

----------

“You know,” you began loudly, sometime later, “there are too many people entering and exiting my room… Sometimes even for the strangest reasons: Like straightening that vase, for example.”

Your words had been spoken sharply, mercilessly and pointed towards the vassal who had been shifting vase’s position without much care. Yes, he was a vassal- the callouses on the interior of his hand and the various scars that littered the backside was enough to inform me of his duties. (Blade scars they were. Had they been blacksmith scars, there would be lesser thin cuts in place of the misshapen splotches from heat.)

And the vassal froze, awkwardly chuckling as he slid out from your room. Your eyes, however, had landed upon a very much surprised Hideyoshi before trailing off to a chuckling Masamune and Mitsuhide.

“It’s pretty transparent you don’t trust me.”

Your lips parted and gave way to a quiet sigh, as you quietly finished the bowl of miso soup Masamune had provided you.

“But I don’t really care about that, Hideyoshi, because I know that even if I say that the truth is I have no ill intentions towards anyone in the castle or the town below, you wouldn’t believe me anyway.”

Shaking your head lightly, you returned the bamboo soup spoon to the wooden tray and closed your eyes. Hideyoshi had been watching your behaviour with that same silence as Masamune questioned your thoughts on his food. Truly, you had him stumped. He hadn’t expected that level of carelessness to be combined with that level of observation.

(Well, he knew it was obvious, but he hadn’t expected you to pick up on his orders that quickly…)

“I did warn you of the possibility she would notice, Hideyoshi.”

“I don’t want to hear that from you!” Hideyoshi spat, pointing an accusing finger in Mitsuhide’s direction, “The kitsune who didn’t even provide any suggestions!”

Snickering slightly, your gaze turned to Masamune who had been pouring you tea from the pot on the tray. Gratefully accepting the gesture, you took a sip and savoured the taste before parting your lips to speak. Your eyes shone in amusement.

“You know, the fact that they’re arguing over this just further proves my point? I’m aware it’s a one-sided argument considering Mitsuhide’s currently being wordless, but it proves my point just the same.”

Your tone held a combination of that lingering mischievous grin, playfulness and was that… irritation? Masamune’s blue eyes were drawn towards your lips, suddenly overcome with the intense desire to kiss the expression from your face. You had noticed this of course, and your lips curled into a displeased frown as you reached up and flicked him on the forehead with your thumb and middle finger.

“Please don’t…”

Your statement had been muttered beneath your breath but it had been clear by the expression of dislike and discomfort written across your face. It wasn’t the notion of kissing you disliked, it was simply the thought of… well, romance in general. Romance was something you would never come to like, no matter how much you felt for that person; no matter how much they felt for you.

And as always, there were reasons for that.

And as always, the reasonings weren’t pleasant in the slightest.

Quietly sighing, you stood, lifting the tray as you did so. Hideyoshi was right. It was time for you to leave the discomfort of your provided room and to discover the whereabouts of the castle’s kitchens… Just in the case you wanted to make your own snacks.

Just in case.

Anyhow, you had exited your room silently with Masamune tagging along curiously, leaving the bickering couple behind in your room. He trailed behind you like a lost puppy, dodging past maids and footmen alike. It was amusing to watch, whenever you could see through the passing shine of the nearby vases. Your destination was the kitchens, though you were certain you had no clue as to the location. And so you wandered down the hallways, up and down the stairs; left and right, passing many - perhaps hundreds - of castle staff in your seemingly fruitless search.

It took you twenty, utterly confusing minutes to arrive at the kitchen.

There were far too many people in the castle for you to keep up with, let alone the number of food-related scents that wafted through the air. In addition to that, Masamune had unrelentingly trailed behind you, laughing- loudly, at that- making you instinctively growl in irritance.

(You were wrong, it seemed. Mitsuhide wasn’t the one who would come under your skin- It’d be Masamune-)

And you sighed anyway, walking over to the assumed ‘sink’ and instinctively begin hand washing the dishes left by the sink with the cloth and Sengoku-era soap. Standing by the door, Masamune just smiled at the sight of your domestic instincts (much similar to his) and just watched your cute, concentrating expression.

… that was, until he was disrupted by a sudden maid.

(You were also absolutely certain, given the strange looks she gave you, that she wondered what on Earth you were doing in the castle kitchens as an individual ranked higher than she was-)

The unnamed maid had been responsible for the midday snacks to be provided to both the warlords and the princess- You. Sensing the newfound figure in the room, you turn to glance at the individual before shrugging to yourself and continue on, hoping the silence would remain at least until you finished.

But atlas! Nothing ever goes your way, does it?

It hadn’t even been 10 minutes since she had entered the room that there was a grunt of pain… Well, it wasn’t so much of a grunt as a rather loud “Ow!”. Turning around, your eyebrows furrowed themselves, and you approached her cautiously. (You could smell the blood, but-) Without a second thought, Masamune had disappeared down the corridor in search of Ieyasu’s medicine room.

You rolled your eyes in response.

“Um,” you began timidly, mentally kicking yourself in the face, “Do you mind if I have a look at that?”

“Ah. Uh- Milady! I’m f-fine-”

“Nonsense!” You exclaimed before faltering, “It’s better to have immediate treatment than none.

“Nonsense,” you uttered a little louder; a little less unconfident-sounding, “Getting an injury treated earlier is much better than later.”

Glancing to the right and at the table beside you, your eyes spied the blade she wielded and sighed. She was carelessly slicing meat, too. (You could’ve sworn she was making snacks-?) And without much of a warning, your fingers found their way to her non-dominant hand and grasped it, lifting the wound up to your eyes.

“Is there any saké in here that I can use?”

The maid grimaced, obviously biting her lip through the pain, and nodded to the shelf just behind you.

“I do believe there is some on that shelf second from the bottom-”

But you had popped off to retrieve the jar, a bowl and a clean knife, sniffing the air quietly as you went. Setting the items down on a cleared section of the table, you proceeded to tear the sleeve of your kimono from it’s rightful location with the knife, swearing to repair the damage at a later date… If you remembered, that was. Slicing the piece of fabric in half, you soaked the fabric in a bowl of saké and began cleaning the wound intricately, recalling the numerous times you had repaired your own body with the same techniques as the maid whimpered at the sting.

“Hey,” you began suddenly; softly breaking the silence, “can you do me a favour, and close your eyes?”

The maid nodded, though perhaps more in fear of your report to other warlords than in fear of your actions. And once you were certain her eyes were shut tight, you allowed your eyes to return to their golden colour and your forefinger-tip to glow a pale, blue light. Tracing the finger along the wound line, you watched as the wound glowed slightly before stitching itself together and fading into nothing but smooth skin.

Another wound healed…

(The truth was, it wasn’t as much of ‘healing’, as much as it was reconstructing instead…)

And before you could allow her to walk free, your previously-glowing hand disappeared up your sleeve and created a short stick from thin air. Binding the stick to the ‘injured’ thumb, you wound the remains of the fabric strip around the stick before tucking and tying the fabric in a cute bow.

“Alright. You can open your eyes again. Just… Make sure you leave it dressed for a week. Don’t worry about replacing the dressing or anything. It’ll be fine.”

The maid nodded, racing off to report to whoever was necessary.

#Ikemen sengoku #Luck chapter 3 #Maidens #Hideyoshi #mitsuhide #nobunaga #masamune

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luobingmeis · 5 years

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fukc,,,, talking about lucretia reminded me of how much i love her afionavaw. you said that you have thoughts about the order of the seven birds forgiving her? you don't have to elaborate it rn but what order do you think it it? i think magnus or merle would be one of the first ones to forgive her, then lup and barry, and davenport and taako would be the later ones. also sorry im bombarding you with questions alfwbgkh

@marblesaremyfavoriterock asked: I’m loving this discussion u and anon are having abt Lucretia and forgiveness!! In the post abt Lup u said you’ve put a bunch of thought into how each of the birds come to forgive Lucretia and how long that takes and I’d love to hear ur thoughts on that stuff if you want to talk abt it!!!

(disclaimer: i am speaking for myself and only myself and i get that not everyone might agree with what i think, and obvi that’s fine, but i’m not here to start fights/angry discussions)

my entire blog is actually just a secret campaign to get everyone to love lucretia adventurezone

but!!! about the other birds!!!!! i have put so much thought into this so first let me just put everything in the order of which i think forgiveness happens

merle/lup (during s&s)

magnus (during s&s)/davenport (shortly after s&s)

barry (a while after s&s)

taako (a while after s&s)

and now, my explanations:

merle: from the get-go of s&s, we see that merle never treats lucretia with animosity. while taako and magnus are pointing their weapons at her, merle is constantly asking what they’re doing and trying to get them to put their weapons down. also, canonically, i think it’s safe to say that merle doesn’t hold much of a grudge. he appears to like kravitz, even though kravitz almost killed him and had probably some hand (pun intended) in merle’s loss of faith for a little bit. he also greeted john warmly and kindly, even though their last interaction involved merle telling john to “kiss my ass, you sanctimonious bastard.” also, though, maybe it’s just me, but i saw merle and lucretia as two very good friends. in stolen century, he constantly encouraged her and was the one to tell her that she should consider taking on a more leaderlike role. in the bureau, he admired the faith she had in herself. so, i think he would forgive lucretia first because, honestly? that’s just how merle is. not only does he admire lucretia and see her as a good friend, but it’s just in his nature. also, important to note, merle obviously loves his kids, and without lucretia, he wouldn’t have his kids. so, w/ the prior friendship he had with lucretia/madame director, his personality, and what he got after the voidfishing, i think he was always in a state of forgiving lucretia.

lup: see this post

magnus: magnus is actually interesting in my opinion because, if it wasn’t for the fact that he found happiness in raven’s roost, i think he would be a lot less inclined to forgive lucretia. during stolen century, magnus learned how to ask for help and really became “the protector” during those one hundred years. he gained a family, and a dear pet, that he swore he would protect. however, this was lost after the voidfishing. he still wanted to protect but he didn’t exactly know who, or what. factor in the fact that he was the first one to start distrusting the director, plus the fact that he was getting very close with the voidfish, who didn’t seem to know how to answer any of his questions about the director, and all of that would add up to a rocky forgiveness of lucretia. except, now we have to consider two things. one being the fact that travis said it’s canon that magnus saw how hard of a decision lucretia had to make and, because of that, magnus doesn’t hold a lot of malice against her. the second thing that i think we need to consider is raven’s roost. after stolen century, i think we can say that magnus got the “happiest voidfishing,” in a way. he had raven’s roost, a stable job. he lead a city through a revolution that they all believed to be a success. he found the love of his life. it is canon that those years in raven’s roost were some of the happiest years magnus has ever experienced. if magnus didn’t have raven’s roost, didn’t at one point have julia, i think it would’ve been a lot harder for him to forgive her, bc what would he have had? he would’ve lost his friends, and who’s to say what life he would’ve made outside of raven’s roost. but, because lucretia was technically responsible for him going to raven’s roost and eventually finding julia (and stephen), i think that also factors into his forgiveness of her (plus the canonical stuff travis said, which i am 100% here for).

davenport: i firmly think that davenport forgives lucretia fairly quickly after s&s. now, you might be saying, “jordyn, what the actual fuck,” and don’t worry, i said the same thing to myself. but play with me in this space, give me a chance. i would put lucretia at lawful good, or at least in the “good” category between lawful/neutral. davenport, i think, falls kinda more around true lawful/true neutral. and this, i think, would factor into his forgiveness of lucretia. in stolen century, i think we saw early on that davenport is a very “means to the end” type of guy. he was the one who suggested destroying the crystal on the robot planet. he suggested blowing up the sacred mountain of the conservatory. by cycle 66, he was angry and tired. in cycle, what, 92? when they voted on the relics? davenport didn’t actually vote! he never expressed his opinion on the matter. he let the majority decide because, with whatever they chose, he would go along with it as long as they could see an end to their journey. then, during s&s, he was the one to suggest leaving. he was the one to suggest killing the voidfish. throughout seeing his actual character, and not just voidfished davenport, we see him constantly pushing towards the gruesome, though some might say “easy way out,” decisions. bc that’s who he is. destroy the crystal bc, even if it hurts people now, it will stop the hunger later. destroy the mountain bc, even if it sucks for this world, we can use the light to save other ones. make a decision between relics and a barrier because, even though we don’t know the results now, it could help later. leave this world, people are gonna die now, but we can try again next cycle. kill the voidfish, because then everyone can fight back. see? very “means to an end.” so, now, how does this factor into forgiveness? w/ the other birds’ forgiveness, it’s hinged on a much more emotional/social level. merle forgives bc it’s in his nature. magnus forgives bc of the bonds he has formed. davenport, though? it’s all… pragmatic, professional, almost? i think he would look at lucretia, at what she had done, and then at the fact that they saved the world, and would think, “well, she did what she had to, because without that, we wouldn’t have saved this world.” i don’t think he enjoyed being turned into just his name, and i still think he and lucretia need to talk, but i think, looking at the results of everything, he kinda sees it as “X had to happen so that Y could.” now, his forgiveness does hinge on saving the world. say they ran to a different plane? i don’t know if davenport would have forgiven her as easily, because then their failure would just look like a halt in their journey. but because they won? i think he would forgive lucretia because, well, they won. they finally got a happy ending and, after looking at all the decisions davenport tried to make, i think it’s safe to say that he understands having to make hard decisions.

barry: barry, like magnus, is complicated, i think. i think he has more notches in the “not forgiving lucretia for a while” category than not. why? similarly to taako, because of lup. except, instead of taako not knowing who lup was until the end, for barry it’s because he knew. when he was a lich, he 1) figured out what lucretia was doing and 2) figured out that lup had been voidfished. he found out that lucretia had made this organization w/ an inherent distrust of magic items and powerful magic users, he found out that lup had been voidfished entirely, and, most of all? lucretia was now actively working against him. i do not subscribe to the idea of lucretia being a villain, but in barry’s eyes, i think she was, just like barry might have been closer to an antagonist in lucretia’s eyes bc he was trying to undo her plan. so, i think barry takes a while to forgive lucretia bc 1) he lost lup, and knew he would forget lup once again once he was “alive” again, 2) lucretia knew he was out there and was now making her organization a place where he could never be, and 3) his friends were now actively working against him bc of the structure of the bureau. i think a huge part of the reason for barry and taako’s reluctance to forgive is so closely hinged on lup (well, for taako, that’s canonical) because i think it’s also important to remember that lup never forgot. sure, she was forgotten, which sucks a whole lot obvi, but she never had to forget her love and her brother. so i think that’s where a sort of rift happens bc taako and barry had to deal with forgetting lup, while lup never forgot them, and though that might be a post in itself if i could think of the right way to word it, i think that also factors into forgiveness a lot. i think, like w/ taako, he and lucretia also have a discussion, except i think that one might be a lot more emotionally charged bc these two were actively working against each other for a time. but i do think that they eventually reach reconciliation and perhaps do actually consider each other friends again.

taako: taako in itself is complicated just bc of how so many people are divided on it, but i think taako’s general rate of forgiveness (and lack thereof for a time) is self explanatory, but i gave my two cents here if you’re interested. tbh, the taako&lucretia situation would be much better told if i actually just wrote a fic on it, bc i feel like my thoughts could be much better expressed in prose than me trying to word my headcanons in a way that people could understand exactly what i have in my head. however, if pressed and given some time to answer and sort out my thoughts in a completely different post, i could probably try to write out all my thoughts on taako&lucretia post-s&s.

#answered #i saw seven birds #Anonymous #//#/////#taz balance

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fuckyouclarke · 5 years

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One thing I've noticed about the og!100 members of spacekru (and is one of the many flaws of the show) is that they all have outgrown Clack. Between Murphy, Raven, Bellamy and Monty (though some more than others bc shitty writing) they have learned to forgive and grow and work together. They apologize and actually change their bad behavior (Bell+Murph) they actively try to find ways in which to keep peace or problem solve without violence (Raven+Monty) all things C can't seem to do without 1/3

2/3 either victimizing herself "making the hard decisions *cry* *cry*", making backhanded apologies that's essentially "I'm sorry you were offended", or not apologizing at all then getting all pout-pout when people don't trust her. One of the main reasons why I don't like her is because she undynamic and unsympathetic for that same reason. She doesn't change so she doesn't grow so anything involving her is rinsed and repeated so she's boring to watch. And that's on the writers for not letting

3/? her be wrong. The characters hating her is ignored by many fans (foolishly) despite all the shit she put them through bc it all seems to work out in the end. The narrative doesn't hold her accountable so it makes C stans feel justified in saying that the ones affected by her actions are ungrateful. And calling her out is happening too late in the series so even though spacekru is right in their criticism of C the fans would rather double down on C than actually listen to the people who

4/4 have had to deal with the repercussions of her actions (torture, almost being killed, being manipulated, I would say dying in Monty's case since he sacrificed himself for C's betrayal). Everyone has surpassed her in emotional maturity and boy does it show. There is no sense of self reflection in C or accountability that spacekru has seen and suffered for and are better characters bc of it. At this point C seems like a plot device for shit to happen bc of her stupid actions.

I’m sorry it’s taken me a few days to reply, there’s a lot I want to say and now that it’s the weekend, I can sit down and take all parts of this message in!

See, this is one of the many reasons why I am, and always will be, Team!Spacekru. All 7 of them had grown and changed over those 6 years; they learned to rely on each other and became a family; those who used to be enemies became extremely close and forgave each other for past wrong-doings (Murphy/Bellamy, Murphy/Raven, Murphy/Monty, Bellamy/Echo, etc); they learned from those mistakes, grew from them, made apologies, became better people and got close.

Clarke didn’t.

She was never a part of Spacekru, and was only w/ Madi for those 6 years, while her former “friends” that she knew for less then a year all got to know each other on a level that she never did.

So yeah, definitely they would no longer need her. Not anymore. She’s not their leader, she’s not even their friend anymore after what she did to them. They look to Bellamy as their leader; they have for those 6 years and still do. Clarke hasn’t made any fucking attempt to right any of her wrong doings, because she has believed herself to be in the right the entire time from the moment the Dropship landed on Earth in season 1 all the way up until the end of season 5. But even now, 3 episodes into season 6, she has yet to make any REAL apologies for any of her actions.

Even after Murphy literally spelled it out for her in 6x02 of all the ways she has hurt him!

Actually, people have been attempting to call Clarke out on her shit for seasons now - from Murphy to Bellamy to Octavia to Raven to Abby - and yet, Clarke NEVER listens, because she has this leader mindset that only HER opinions matter; nobody else’s feelings matter and what she’s doing is for the “greater good” and she “has no choice” (*cue pouty face*) Every single time a character has made any type of attempt to call her out in seasons 1-4 before the time jump, that’s exactly what she did. Fast-forward those 6 years (plus 125 years in Cryo), she’s attempting to make MURPHY - of all people - appear to be as bad of a person as she is, when Murphy worked his ass off for 4 straight seasons to get to where he’s at. He paid for his mistakes and he became a better person. Bellamy paid for his mistakes and became a better person - along w/ being a great leader and a great friend.

Clarke’s excuses are never-ending, and the more excuses she makes, the more her stans will jump all over Spacekru and make them out to be the bad guys...when we have LITERAL CANON EVIDENCE FROM THE SHOW that Clarke has been in the wrong - it was literally spelled out for us all throughout season 5, and now going into season 6. While yes, I definitely wish it was done sooner, because her stans are seriously out of control and I want to punch a brick wall the more I see them, it’s better late then never. But I for one don’t find her redeemable at all; I don’t trust her one bit, I hate her and I can never forgive her for any of the shit she pulled.

And I don’t think Spacekru should be forced to forgive her either; which is why I’m so glad that they’re not. Clarke can whine and complain and claim it’s “unfair” how she’s being treated, she can throw a tantrum and pout all she damn well pleases - it’s not going to fix anything! “Facing her demons” and actually owning up to her shit and making a REAL apology to the countless people she’s hurt is the only way that anything can even be remotely fixed!

Clarke’s last real apology was all the way back in episode 3x11 when she apologized to Jasper for Mount Weather and killing Maya - but even though she apologized, she added her usual “I had to save our people” at the end of it. Clarke has a LOT to learn when it comes to making apologies, because nobody will forgive her until she apologies for real and MEANS it.

She needs to take lessons from Murphy and Bellamy.

I did read somewhere a little while ago that w/ Jake Griffin reappearing in some shape or form this season, somebody came up w/ a theory that he will appear and he’ll be used to call his daughter out on what she’s done and show her how to make a real apology. I don’t remember exactly what the post said - I might have seen it on Reddit - but it was definitely an interesting theory.

But then again, even if Clarke does pull her head out of her ass and get over herself, I still don’t find her redeemable. It just goes to show how little Clarke stans actually care about any of the other characters on the show and how they’ve been hurt; they’re feelings don’t matter to them. Clarke has gotten away w/ all of this for WAY too long and it’s time for her to face the consequences.

#erin answers #anti clarke #anti clarke griffin #anticlarke #anti clarke stans #season 6 spoilers #i'm sorry it took me several days to reply!!#i was not going to do this on mobile lol #divinereign4ever

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pendragaryen · 5 years

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Oh that sounds fun! Thanks for tagging me @junebugninja and @iishallbelieve! <3<3<3

Character you’re most looking forward to seeing: I’ll go with most of you here and say: Jordan Green. I’m especially looking forward to see his dynamic with his “foster parents” Clarke and Bellamy, as well as with Madi. But I’m also curious about Russell. What kind of a man/leader is he? Like Thelonious, when he was “drugged”/under the influence of ALIE - that kind of a fanatic tyrant? Or more the reasonable/understandable leader? I’m almost certain it’s not the latter... Maybe on the outside and at first, but....... Mh...

Relationship/Dynamic you are most looking forward to seeing: Bellarke. Foremost and always. They’re my heart and soul. But I’m also interested in seeing the solution of the discord between Raven/Clarke and Murphy/Clarke - in a nutshell: The dynamic of SpaceKru and Clarke. I hope so much they’ll get by asap. I’m feeling so uncomfortable concerning that matter... I guess that’s what the writers wanted to achieve. Oh and I almost forgot: The Blakes... Can Bellamy forgive his sister? Can they forgive EACH OTHER? I’m so excited!

Thing you will miss most about Earth: At this point? Almost everything, tbh. (Except for the Praimfaya(s) of course...) The new planet/moon looks so beautiful and radiant on the surface - but we already witnessed some of its dangers (the bugs/the two-suns-psychosis). What’ll be next? The beautiful landscape isn’t able to cover that uncomfortable and odd feeling I get, whenever I think about the new planet/moon. So yeah, I miss good old earth ENTIRELY atm.

What you are most excited for with the new planet: Um... I don’t know? Rn only the fact that it’s kind of “Monty’s Planet” makes me curious about it. Oh and that “anomaly” Raven and Jordan found... What might this be? Another danger I suppose...

Favourite moment last season: My favourite moment? Or the most heartbreaking/memorable? I give you both bc... I CAN’T POSSIBLY decide.

It would be easy for me to say that my favourite scene(s) is/are the Bellarke-reunion(s) in “Sleeping Giants” and “Pandora’s Box”. But I’ll go with the Blakes here. The “Another traitor who you love”-moment and then the poisoning of Octavia ALWAYS get me.

As for the most heartbreaking/memorable moments for me in S5 I absolutely agree that I have to mention the Marper-goodbye here. That whole damn last scene NEVER fails to make be bawl like a baby... BUT there’s one other scene that had almost the same impact on me and I cannot deny that. It’s the moment/scene when Octavia sends her own brother into the fighting pits, that conversation/argument of the Blake siblings in the jail in, what was it “The warriors will”? Wow... That was DEEP. And I’m always deeply SHOOK bc of it, almost like Bellamy himself (as well as I was when Bellamy poisoned his sister - but out of other reasons... That was too BELLARKE for me to be devestated to the core...).

Sooo, I guess that sums it up perfectly for me when it comes to these questions. ;) I am tagging (only if you want to and haven’t done his already of course): @lovethyblakes, @sometimesrosy, @katersann, @tenmonologues, @bellamys11thfreckle, @the-most-beautiful-broom, @clarkeywifey, @jasperjoordan, @hostagetakerandhisgirlfriend and @bellameblake (in no particular order)

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searchforthescars · 5 years

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Litany - Ch. 12/12

IT’S FINALLY HERE BABEY

okay pls stick around until the end bc I talk about Things and get sappy about this fic but @bombshellsandbluebells thank you thank you for editing this and loving this and not judging me for flinging chapters that only make a little sense into the void (this is what I get for not doing an outline lmao). I’m v blessed to have you in my life

@maelidpoetree , @sarcasticdebate , you guys have written such LOVELY reviews that I still re-read and get emotional about to this day. Thank you for that, and also for convincing me to not delete Litany those two times. Much much much love

And to everyone else who has loved, read, MADE PLAYLISTS AND EDITS FOR (omg) and supported this fic, thank you. I’m always astounded at the responses to things I write. It’s humbling. <3

(the fic is also on ao3)

I have told you where I’m coming from, so put it together. We clutch our bellies and roll on the floor . . . When I say this, it should mean laughter, not poison. I want more applesauce. I want more seats reserved for heroes. Dear Forgiveness, I saved a plate for you. Quit milling around the yard and come inside.

Emori’s glass ornament catches the light from her window and casts beams of cool sunshine in fractures on the hallway wall. Murphy follows those beams to her doorway late on Christmas morning.

He watches as her smaller fingers caress the small delicate etchings there and smiles when he sees the fingers on her larger hand peeking out from the sleeve of her red and green sweater. She doesn’t cover it that often now, and he’s glad; his deep affection for the appendage has never wavered, and he likes seeing it out in the open every now and again, a sign of the comfort she’s found here.

Murphy watches her for another moment before knocking on her open door. She turns. Her hair is messy. She’s wearing the most hideous Christmas sweater he’s ever seen - bright red and green with tiny ornaments hooked into the neckline. He doesn’t have to touch her skin to know it’s warm, from both sleep and sun, and maybe some excitement too, if her flushed cheeks are telling the truth.

“Merry Christmas,” she says softly, a hesitant smile wrinkling the corner of her mouth. “Like my sweater?”

Murphy can’t help but laugh. “It’s...something.”

“Jasper gave it to me,” she says by way of explanation. “He, Monty and Octavia have matching ones.”

“Of course they do,” he grumbles, imagining the look on Raven’s face when she sees, and how Bellamy’s probably going to bust a nut. He must smirk at the thought, because Emori snorts and gives him a tiny smile. “What?”

“Nothing.” She shakes her head. Her hair swishes around her face, and a few strands of it catch on the ornaments on her neckline. “Damn, that’s going to get annoying.”

“Here, let me,” he says, reaching for her hair at the same time she does. Her hands fall back into place as she lets him smooth the hair back.

“Thanks,” she murmurs. Her eyes flick down to his mouth, then back up again. He thinks about saying thought that was my move, but bites his tongue, knowing he might get sucker-punched for it. He’s still not sure where they stand with one another, not after what he did and said, or after their small reconciliation the day after Thanksgiving.

She grins up at him, and suddenly it doesn’t matter. “Hey,” she says conspiratorially, “want to pull a prank?”

Of course he does.

They sneak downstairs and quietly divest the space under the tree of every gift underneath. They hide each wrapped package somewhere in the house; the more obscure, the better. Murphy is immensely proud of himself for thinking to hide his gift to Bellamy on the roof, right behind the chimney, and Raven’s in the oven.

“I hid Monty’s inside the couch,” Emori whispers to him as they scamper back up the stairs. Her eyes are shining with mischief. Murphy wonders if she ever pranked Otan. He also wonders if she’s ever had a Christmas the “traditional” way, but can’t think of a way to ask that wouldn’t be rude. Hey, at least he cares. It’s a start.

They stay in his room until the house wakes up. She walks around and reads the papers on his walls; he sits in his desk chair and watches her move carefully around the small space. Strands of her hair stick to the fuzz of her sweater. She looks warm; she radiates happiness. It’s a good look on her.

He shakes himself out of his snappiness just in time for Octavia’s door to bang open. “Merry Christmas, bitches!” she shouts, yelping as Lexa groans and probably throws something at her head. “Let’s get this bread!”

“Let’s get this- what?” Emori asks, adorably confused.

Murphy laughs and stands up. “Don’t ask. Come on, let’s go see the fruits of our labor.”

They make it downstairs just in time to hear the crunching of Bellamy’s tires on the snow outside and the roar of Zeke’s motorcycle. Murphy holds up one hand, counting down from five on his fingers. When he gets to one, Emori grins as Bellamy hollers, “What the hell?!”

“Nailed it,” Emori singsongs. Murphy snorts.

The door bangs open and Bellamy sticks his head in. “You put my present on the damn roof?!” he shouts.

Murphy grins impishly. “What makes you think it was me?”

Raven opens the oven door, then throws her hands up in exasperation. “Seriously, Murphy? Again?”

“It was my idea,” Emori says, her eyes laughing but her face straight. Raven rolls her eyes, but there’s a smile there that tells Murphy she’s just glad the two of them are working together on something.

Murphy snorts as Monty jumps up to retrieve a package hidden atop the microwave. Emori blinks at him. “Wait… Raven said ‘again’...”

“Oh yeah.” Murphy tilts his head and smiles. “I may or may not have done this last year.”

Emori smirks. “And here I thought I was original.”

Bellamy stomps into the kitchen, tracking snow on the tile. Raven squawks and swats him with a kitchen towel, but he ignores her. “Whatever this is,” he says, holding a damp package aloft, “I don’t want it.”

“You say that now,” Emori singsongs, then leans over to whisper in Murphy’s ear, “It’s a book. He’s going to love it. And I wrapped it in plastic, anyway.”

Bellamy peels off said plastic and drops it in the sink. As Jasper, Monty, Octavia and Lexa clatter down the stairs, he rips off the soggy paper and gives Emori a soft smile. “Thank you,” he says, holding the book up so she can see the cover, even though she’s the one who gave it to him. “I love it.”

Murphy’s heart warms when Emori grins. “I knew it!” she cheers to herself quietly, pumping her fist, a gesture no doubt learned from Monty.

The rest of the house starts ripping into presents too; Raven throws the crow-printed socks Murphy gave her at his head, Lexa races to the kitchen to pour orange juice into her “Classy, Sassy and a Little Smart-Assy” mug from Octavia, and Emori wraps herself up in the massive knitted scarf Murphy found at a street market in the city.

“This is the best present I’ve ever gotten, John,” she says, her smile as warm as the wool wrapped around her neck. “Thank you.”

Murphy’s heart feels like it’s going to leap out of his chest. “You’re welcome.”

When she leans forward to peck him on the cheek, he flinches forward and to the side ever-so-slightly and their lips touch for a brief moment. Monty wolf-whistles and Jasper cheers while Emori covers her mouth with her smaller hand and blinks shyly at him.

“I’m sorry-“ he stammers, but Emori leans forward again, throwing her arms around his shoulders and kissing him soundly on the mouth. “Oh.”

“Get it, J!” Raven yells while Lexa groans something about straight people being unable to control themselves.

“Merry Christmas, John,” Emori whispers. She gets to her feet, scarf still wrapped around her shoulders, and pads to the kitchen in search of coffee, leaving a stunned Murphy and his delighted friends behind.

Breakfast and lunch are haphazard affairs since everyone agreed they’d rather save room for the massive dinner Bellamy, Murphy and Zeke are preparing. Zeke shows up around noon, bearing bags full of groceries and presents. Luna follows him a moment later, Costia in tow. Lexa looks delighted, if not a little terrified, to see her surrogate older sister commiserating with her girlfriend.

“Relax,” Murphy tells her. “This could end really well for you.”

“Or really poorly,” Lexa mutters, eyeing Luna. “Luna’s a straight shooter. She could scare Cos away if she doesn’t approve.”

“My kind of woman,” Murphy remarks, yelping when Raven smacks him upside the head. “Ow?!”

“Your kind of woman is over there, and she’s the jealous type,” Raven says, pointing a thumb at Emori, who’s standing on the kitchen counter, digging around in the cabinet.

“Not jealous,” Emori calls over her shoulder, “Just possessive.”

Lexa wiggles her eyebrows. Raven rolls her eyes, and Luna laughs into her coffee cup.

Bellamy starts to get agitated around three when the roast for dinner isn’t cooking right. Murphy tries to help - it is his crockpot, after all - but quickly gets derailed when he realizes the kitchen is not big enough for all three cooks.

“Sorry, man,” he says to Zeke, whose efforts to shimmy behind Murphy failed after Murphy stepped back, almost whacking Raven’s almost-boyfriend in the head in the process.

“Oh no, no, you’re fine,” Zeke says, quick-stepping over Bellamy’s leg and putting a pan on the counter.

“What did you just say?” Raven calls from the living room, where she’s trying to install the new coding software Bellamy got her for Christmas.

“I said he was fine,” Zeke says.

“How Midwestern of you,” Costia remarks drily.

Zeke raises an eyebrow at her. “How did you know?”

“It’s easy to tell,” she says. “You say words funny.”

Raven hoots. Zeke groans and disappears into Raven’s room, where they’re storing all their coats. After a moment, Raven goes to join him.

“Have fun, Reyes,” Murphy calls after her.

“Fuck straight off, Murphy,” she replies. Emori whistles. When her eyes meet Murphy’s, she stands up.

“John, I forgot to give you your card,” she says. Murphy carefully picks his way across the crowded kitchen and dining room to reach her. She hands him a small envelope, then disappears upstairs before he can even break the seal.

The card’s printed sentiment is lame, but her written words aren’t. To his surprise and embarrassment, Murphy can’t help but blink back some tears as he reads. If anyone notices, they know better than to comment.

John,

Christmas is supposed to be a time for family, but my family isn’t here this year. I thought I would be heartbroken, but I’m not. You are my family, and so is Raven and everyone else. I’m not good at this sappy shit - clearly, since I wrote a swear word in a Christmas card - but I’m going to try.

When I answered Raven’s ad, I had no idea the love and safety you all would bring into my life. Thank you for your part in that. Thank you for loving me how you are able to, and thank you for trying to love me better by loving yourself. I see you, and I love you.

Merry Christmas, John. Never forget how loved you are, by me and everyone else.

-Em

During dinner, they sit at the dining room table and on the floor in the living room, spreading their Christmas Eve feast over end tables and folding chairs that no one wants to sit on for some reason. Murphy sits at the table elbow-to-elbow with Raven and Emori; Zeke and Bellamy sit across from them. Monty, Jasper, Lexa, Octavia and Costia sprawl on the floor, while Luna and Echo take over the couch. Raven tries to play music two separate times - “It’s for the Ambiance,” Octavia says, and Murphy just knows the capital A is implied - but the noise coming from all corners of the house renders that effort more chaotic than mood-setting.

Murphy keeps sneaking glances at Emori. Her eyes shine with excitement and delight as she takes a massive serving of Zeke’s now-famous corn casserole. She grins when Raven starts roasting Bellamy for only getting books for Christmas. She even smiles at Murphy once or twice, which sends his heart rate through the ceiling.

Echo finishes first and starts in on the dishes. Bellamy follows, brushing her shoulder with his hand as he leans past her to start drying plates. Murphy watches them over his shoulder, the confidence in their movements, the ease with which they exist in one another’s space. When he turns back to face the table, he locks eyes with Emori and sees his longing and jealousy mirrored there.

Time slows down in the moments between clearing his plate and ending up in Emori’s room. Somehow he ends up at her bedroom door looking at her back, braced against the window frame, her legs swinging over the window’s edge, hair blowing in the cold West Virginia wind. It’s a mirror of this morning’s moment, or maybe an inversion, since her back is to him in this instance, though her face is turned upward.

“I never had a Christmas like this,” he hears her say to the wind. He steps inside her room but doesn’t shut the door. “With people and presents and noise and happiness.”

“Was it- Did you like it?” He winces at his own verbal ineptitude.

She nods, sniffs and looks over her shoulder. Her eyes glitter in the pale light from the hall. “Come sit with me,” she says softly, beckoning with her smaller hand.

When he’s comfortably seated with his head leaning against the window frame, his body snug between it and Emori’s legs, she rests her forehead on his shoulder and speaks to his upper arm. “I miss you.”

The distance between him is his own doing. The ache in his chest is, too. “I’m sorry.”

How do I cross the line between us? he wants to ask, but doesn’t want to come off either dramatic or desperate, even though he is both, just by nature.

“Thank you for your card,” he says softly. He turns, rests his chin atop her head, and resists the urge to press a kiss atop it. “It meant a lot.”

“I meant it.” Her voice is muffled. She doesn’t look up at him, but he can feel the wrinkle of her forehead through his sweater.

“You okay?”

She lifts her head. There’s a look in her eyes, equal parts caged animal and hesitant human. “If I let you in, you can’t hurt me. I won’t let you.”

Murphy takes a deep breath. Here, on his side of the drawn line, there is everything he is ashamed of. On her side, there is the smile in her voice when she speaks to him and the soft way she says his given name.

“I can’t promise I won’t hurt you,” he says slowly. “But I won’t try to.”

Emori smiles, sudden and blinding. She turns to face him, shifting so she’s straddling the windowsill. The ornaments on her God-awful sweater glint and tap together as she moves.

“Okay.” She kisses him on the cheek, then the nose. He grins. “Let’s start over.”

Murphy leans forward and presses his lips to hers, a proper kiss this time. When she laughs against his mouth, his chest expands. Then he’s the one who laughs as he remembers a line from a particular Christmas movie.

“What?” she asks, pulling away. And then Raven’s voice sounds from the doorway, where she’s leaning against the frame, looking as self-satisfied as he’s ever seen her.

“‘And the Grinch’s small heart’,” she quotes dramatically, a shit-eating grin wide on her face, “‘grew three sizes that day’.”

Emori howls with laughter. The foot dangling from the window kicks in the air. Murphy reaches for the nearest pillow near the foot of Emori’s bed and chucks it at Raven, who shrieks and limps downstairs. Murphy catches up to her by sliding down the bannister and tosses the couch’s blanket over her head, then proceeds to tickle her in the stomach until she goes to her knees, laughing and wheezing and pushing a worried Zeke away.

Murphy looks up after pulling the blanket off Raven’s head and locks eyes with Emori, who hovers at the top of the stairs, one hand on the bannister, one hand on the first step down. It’s a mirror of a moment during her first day at home: her hesitant eyes, Murphy and Raven on the couch, his nonchalant “you can come down.”

An invitation, he thinks. A request, maybe, and certainly an assurance that no matter where he is, she belongs. That no matter where she is, he is wanted.

“You can come down,” he says to her quietly. She takes a step down. Behind him, Zeke helps Raven to her feet.

“You can come down,” Murphy says to her again, remembering waiting at the bottom of the stairs on their first date, awestruck at her beautiful dress and the warmth in her cheeks.

Emori’s feet hit the floor beside him. She slings her arm around his shoulder and he reaches up to play with the long fingers of her left hand. While watching Monty, Raven and Zeke make a nest on the couch to watch The Nightmare Before Christmas, Murphy presses a kiss to every part of her hand he can reach.

“Dear Forgiveness,” he hears her murmur, almost to herself, in that casual, thoughtful way, “I saved a place for you. Quit milling around the yard and come inside.”

She kisses him on the cheek, disentangles herself from him, and goes to sit beside Raven, squealing when the other girl’s cold feet make contact with her bare ankles. Murphy watches them all, lit by the kitchen light and the glow of the TV, and wonders if it’s possible for a heart to break from happiness.

If it is, he supposes, as he leans his forearms against the couch inches from Raven’s head, he’ll gladly handle this kind of heartbreak now until forever.

Yeet yeet babey we did it

The end of this story is bittersweet for me in a strange way. I started writing Litany during a time in my life where I was not doing well, mentally, physically or emotionally. This story became a strange form of catharsis, a way for me to access the dark things in me and process them through the eyes of a character who resembles me in ways I'd rather not think about.

As Murphy and Emori learned and grew and recovered, I tried to do the same. Clearly, I'm not there yet (as evidenced by the two times I almost deleted this fic on a self-destructive whim). But there's always hope as long as you learn how to forgive yourself.

If you're dealing with stuff like this, please talk to someone. A parent, a teacher, a friend, a therapist, someone. My asks on Tumblr are always open (my Tumblr name is the same as here). We all need a Raven, an Emori, a Bellamy and a Luna sometimes.

Thanks for reading this. I hope you liked it. I'll see you soon, never fear :)

Much love, Amanda

#litany fic #long post #dailymemori #maelidpoetree #maskingtapepoetree #(in case you're still tracking the old tag)#bombshellsandbluebells #daisytachi #doortotomorrow #sarcasticdebate #memori fanfic

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harrysbaebyhoney · 6 years

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BEFORE THE BLITZ.

A/N: this story is about 10k words, so a bit of a long oneee! it’s part one out of a three part fic, and i’m not really sure when the other parts will be written, as it took a lot of work for this one to be done, but i’m hoping soon!!! i’m not claiming to be a ww2 scholar, so there might be some wrong info abt the time period, but i did my best based off the research i did. so pls remember this is a work of fiction and i’m not claiming for it to be 100% true! i really hope you enjoy this story, pls let me know any of your thoughts abt it bc i love hearing feedback. there is angst, smut, and fluff throughout it all!!! i’m not too good at writing smut yet so pls forgive me. anyways, enjoy, share, and lemme know what you think ((:

PART I.

1939, Birmingham.

“Helps me forget we're far apart,

I don't know exactly when, dear,

But I'm sure we'll meet again, dear,

And my darling, till we do

You are always in my heart!”

He watched as the band set down their instruments, announcing a short break in order to regain themselves before the night would take a more upbeat turn. It was December now, a few months after the proclamation of war against Germany was declared. Most people’s moods were shifted into one of plain anxiety and fear for either their own lives or their loved ones.

Coming to the bar tonight was an escape for all of them as jazz tunes would soon be played, and everyone would engage in swing dancing, forgetting about their worries and the threat to their lives that loomed over them. He came to forget about his lingering fear that he would soon be drafted, too.

Sipping on the rum he held in his large palm, his eyes danced around the room, hoping to catch sight of his friend, Nick. Fortunately, he found him mingling with three ladies in the corner of the bar. Harry chuckled to himself, shaking his head in disbelief. Leave it to Nick to attempt charming three ladies at once.

Pushing himself off of the bar he leaned on, he took long strides over to the group, pausing once he was behind his friend. “‘Been waiting fo’yeh, mate,” He announced his presence, his words silky and smooth as he clasped a hand on Nick’s shoulder.

Nick turned to offer him a sheepish grin, giving a small shrug. “Sorry, got a bit distracted. Ladies, meet my dearest friend and fellow prisoner of the factory system, Harry Styles,” He introduced him to the three, grinning widely.

Harry took the opportunity to peer over at them, granting them a small nod as his greeting. The blonde hardly seemed interested in either of them, her gaze wavering around the room for an escape. Meanwhile, the lighter brunette was latching herself onto Nick’s arm, practically giggling at the simplest remark he would make.

Then, his gaze shifted to the shorter girl of the three, a raven-haired beauty. To his delight, she was peering at him through her long lashes, memorizing the details of his face and the way his scruff was beginning to grow. He had woken up late this morning and didn’t bother to shave, considering he had almost forgotten to even put his shoes on whilst running out the door to his job.

Y/N had hardly wanted to come tonight, too preoccupied about starting her new job on Monday, but her friends promised her a night of dancing, drinks, and shameless flirting would ease her nerves. Now, under the gaze of an emerald-eyed beauty, she wished she had listened to her instincts. When she saw the lit-up sign, Interlude, hanging outside the bricked building, she should have turned the other way. She should never have come. Since the second her eyes met his, she knew she would be trapped, and she could not afford any more attachments right now.

“Hello, I didn’t quite catch your name,” He greeted her, a grin forming on his lips as he was obliviously unaware of the thoughts circling through her mind at the same moment.

Her lips twitched upwards slightly as she shook her head with light laughter passing her lips, “That’s because I didn’t say it, Mr. Styles.” His ears perked up at that, he could get used to her calling him that…

Clearing his throat, he looked down at her with amusement, his lean figure towering over her own silhouette. “Then, what’re we waiting for? What’s yeh’ name?” His brow arched as he waited for her response, but she merely stared up at him with a fond grin on her expression.

“We’re waiting for you to get me a drink first,” She quipped back smoothly as they both seemed to forget about their friends standing next to them. It didn’t matter, though. The blonde had ventured off on her own, attempting to find her own admirer for the night, while Nick and Elizabeth were too preoccupied with each other.

“Oh, so that’s how s’gonna be? Using me for a drink, hm?” His voice was scolding, but his expression read amusement. She merely shrugged back in response, hands entwined in front of her as she sweetly looked up at him with big, doe eyes. “Alright, only ‘cos yeh’re cute.”

Her cheeks tinged pink at the compliment, and she was suddenly glad that the bar was dimly lit. His head cocked towards the bar, inviting her to follow after him, which she did but his strides were long and she was practically tripping over her own feet to keep up.

Placing her hands on the counter, she jumped up onto the stool and took a seat with her elbows resting on the table. Harry was leaning against the counter beside her, raising his fingers to beckon the bartender over. She pouted slightly when she realized that his figure still towered over her even while being raised by the stool.

“Yeh’, we’ll have a…” Harry trailed off, his gaze flickering back to the girl sitting beside him.

“Oh, just a French 75,” She told him to which he perked his eyebrow at, but, nevertheless, ordered the drink for her. Her gaze shifted to observe the scenery of the bar and the vibe it gave off.

The entire place reeked of alcohol and a hint of oak, although she may have been imagining the latter due to the architecture of the building being composed mostly of wood. Heels clicked against the wooden floor as ladies begin to flood the dance floor, dragging their dates along with them. It felt cosy and safe, like their secret hideout from the cruelties and atrocities of the world that awaited them.

It was their last place of fun and freedom before times would shift and everyone’s focus would be on the telephone, waiting to hear from their loved ones, rather than on the trumpet player up on the stage. A breath was released from her lips, gulping as the memory of her brother began to reappear in her mind.

Shaking her head, she pushed the thought away, knowing her friends would scold her for failing the one duty she had to accomplish for the night: to have fun. Luckily, her thoughts were interrupted with the drink that was held out before her and the cheeky lad who seemed prepared to continue his act of charming her.

“Deal’s a deal, love. M’gonna need yeh’ name now,” He tried again, meeting her own smug grin with the slight quirk of his lips.

Taking a sip of her drink, she caved in— it was hard not to when such brilliantly green eyes were staring her down. “I’m (Y/N),” She officially introduced herself, watching as his small smile grew wider.

“(Y/N),” He repeated, trailing off as he seemed to be memorizing the exact pronunciation of it.

“Glad your ears work,” She cheekily responded, giggling softly as he nudged her shoulder with his elbow. He didn’t seem to mind her teasing, though. In fact, he could make do with it for however long she would like if he were allowed to hear that cute giggle leave her lips once more.

“Yeh’ come out tonight with your friends here often?”

“No, it’s just cause I’m starting a new job on Monday. M’really nervous and all that, so they thought it would be best to let me loosen up for tonight… ease my nerves,” Y/N told him.

“What job? M’sure yeh’re going to do great, love, they picked yeh’ for a reason,” Harry earnestly assured her, offering a small smile her way.

“Well, it’s just a secretary position at this big corporation for now. I’m hoping I can impress them enough for a promotion, then maybe have enough experience to run my own business,” She informed him, before continuing on, “Nick said you work in a factory?”

“Yeh’, I do. Not exactly m’dream job, but it makes money, which is all that matters right now,” He told her, a slight frown pressed upon his lips.

“What is your dream job then, Harry?” She asked him curiously.

“‘ve always wanted to own my own bar, actually, and play music all the time like here— live artists, expressing themselves, yeh’ know? One day, I want to be one of those men up on that stage, performing, though m’not sure if that would settle well with everybody else,” Harry opened up to her, a sheepish grin adorned on his features.

Y/N gazed at him with admiration and a soft smile, nodding along. “You better achieve that dream, I’m tired of hearing the same old songs. It’d be nice to hear a new voice,” She assured him, their grins fondly matching one another.

“As long as I see yeh’ running your own business, (Y/N),” He promised her.

“I’ll drink to that,” She raised her glass before the two took a sip of their chosen drinks. Smiles were written on their face, unable to be erased.

As the music became upbeat, the trumpets blaring with glee, he turned to glance at the stage and the crowded dance floor before returning to gaze at her. “Dance with me,” He moreso ordered than asked her, though his hues held a pleading glint.

Setting down her drink, her nose scrunched up. She could make it easy, give in to him now, but that wouldn’t be as much fun for her. Her friends did tell her to have fun tonight. What was more fun than playing a game of chase?

“Dunno’ if I’ve drunk enough for that…” She began to reject his offer to which he frowned at.

“Oh, c’mon, love, it’ll be fun. Can’t come here without at least doin’ one swing da-“

“Sorry, hope I’m not interfering. Saw you just sitting here, was wonderin’ if you cared to dance?” A blonde man who stood a few inches shorter than Harry questioned the same girl Harry was attempting to win over.

Y/N turned her head sideways to peer at the newcomer, her lips shifting into a large grin. “I’d love to!” She exclaimed excitedly, hopping off the stool and taking the blonde’s hand in her own dainty one. As he began to lead her onto the dance floor, and while Harry was attempting to unravel what just occurred, she turned around to wink at the dumbfounded, curly-haired man.

“Thanks for the drink, Harry. I’ll see you around?” She offered before she was lost in the dance floor amidst the moving bodies.

Harry hadn’t missed how her lips were quirked into an amused, challenging smirk, though. Though he had felt blatantly rejected at first, he recognized the little game she was playing, and he was determined to win. Finishing his own drink, he set it down before marching off to find her.

Indeed, he found her, dancing with the same bloke who interrupted them. Her short figure was being spun around while she grinned widely, eyes shut as if lost in the moment. Approaching a redhead, he managed to cop his own partner and began to join the dance.

Y/N had her arms around the blonde’s shoulders who was babbling on and on about how he was here to celebrate his best friend’s engagement. It was endearing, really, but she couldn’t be bothered. Instead, her eyes began to roam the bar to see if the brunette was still there. When she couldn’t spot him at their spot by the bar, a pout settled upon her lips. Perhaps, he had not understood her game and had given up on her, too insulted to continue pursuing her.

Beginning to feel rather bummed out, she sighed softly as she was spun around in circles, twirling away from her partner. Hands grabbed her waist, pulling her close again, and she looked up, expecting to see the blonde but was met by green hues. A surprised gasp left her lips, brows furrowing in confusion.

“Traded partners,” Harry simply explained, cocking his head towards the blonde and redhead who were now dancing around.

A smile began to form on Y/N’s lips, looking back up at Harry. Relief flooded throughout her, glad that he had realized her challenge. “Missed me so quickly?” She pondered, gasping once more as he turned her around, pressing his chest into her back while one hand had slid into her own, the other resting on her hip.

He swayed his hips along with hers to the music, leaning down to whisper in her ear, so that she could hear him over the blasting, swing music. “Yeh’ left jus’ when we were gettin’ started,” He murmured, spinning her out with one hand. She turned her head to glance at him while she stood a few feet apart from him, still clutching onto his hand with her own.

“Starting what exactly?”

He brought her back in, chests pressed against one another as her hands moved to slide up onto his broad shoulders. “The rest of our fun night, of course,” He responded as if it were the obvious answer.

To that, she offered light laughter, shaking her head in amusement. “Oh, yeah? You decided we were gonna have fun, did you?”

“No, ‘course not. I was hopin’ actually, kind of why I wanted you to stick around, so I can see if that’s what you wanted, too,” His voice was softer, more questioning as he looked down at her with a questioning gaze.

Her light mood seemed to take a sudden twist as her grin fell. Removing her hands from his shoulders, she shook her head as she turned her face away from him. “I.. I gotta go,” She weakly offered before scurrying off the dance floor.

This time, he had recognized no challenge or game. She was truly attempting to escape, to flee him as if he represented some horrific idea. He was thoroughly confused, unsure of where he had crossed the line. Maybe she truly was repulsed by him and was mortified he would offer having a fun night to her.

“Fo’ fucks sake,” He mumbled to himself, cursing himself for crossing the boundaries too quickly. But, she had seem interested, hadn’t she? No, she had run off with the first man who interrupted their conversation and wouldn’t even give her name to him until she was bought a drink. Perhaps, he had thought too much into it.

Y/N, meanwhile, pushed open the doors of the bar to escape into the cold night. Shivering as she realized she forgot her jacket inside, she wrapped her arms around herself. All she had to cover herself up was the orange button-up blouse she had worn to match with her pleated skirt. Knowing the brunette would be after her, she decided to saunter a bit further until she stood behind the building where the path was rocky and the railroad tracks were only a few feet away.

Harry had frantically reached for his coat, tugging it over his lanky body before following her steps outside the building. He looked to either side of him, not spotting her figure in the darkness of the night. Huffing to himself, he frowned with furrowed brows, wondering where she could have gone.

Deciding to look around, he checked the alleyway beside the building. Disappointed when it turned out to be empty, besides a snogging couple, he was beginning to believe it was time to give up before he heard some sniffling.

Anxious, he followed the noise till he hesitantly approached the familiar, tiny figure that stared ahead at the empty railroad tracks. “I… I didn’t mean to make yeh’ cry, love,” He started to say, but she cut him off with a small groan.

“I’m not crying! It’s cold out here,” She defended herself, turning her head over her shoulder to peer at the nervous male. Her nose had turned red due to the cold surrounding her, but no tears stained her cheeks.

“Oh,” The word fell off his lips lamely before he hurriedly took off his jacket and wrapped it around her dainty figurine. “What’re yeh’ doin’ out here, then? Yeh’ could’ve stayed inside, just told me to fuck off,” He scolded her, his body still standing a few feet away from her— so not to cross more boundaries.

“M’sorry if I… I said anything out of line in there. I really do respect women, I don’t expect them to just come have fun wit’ me, just thought… don’t know what I thought, really. Seemed so clever in the mo’, but…” He was rambling on, so she decided it was time to save him from further embarrassment.

“You didn’t cross any boundaries, Harry. I’m not upset about that.”

“Oh,” He said again, relief flooding throughout him that he hadn’t messed it all up, “Then… what happened?”

“I.. I can’t do this. I can’t have fun with you, Harry.”

His hands had shoved into his pockets, his own nose turning red as he had never been one to handle the cold too well, either. He was confused, honestly, by what she was saying, which is why he had kept quiet to what she responded with.

Once she realized he had no reply, she continued on with a sigh, “It would be no good for us.”

Her body turned to face him, arms crossing over her chest as her gaze shifted from his orbs to his boots. He stepped closer, waiting to see if she moved away before further advancing. Once he was close enough, his hands grabbed her elbow gently in his palms. “Why not? ’S just a bit o’fun, didn’t think it could be so bad,” He asked, perplexed.

“Because, for us, it wouldn’t just end up in fun. People like us, together, can’t just have fun, you know? It’s hard to explain, I probably sound crazy right now. I just knew the moment we started talking, you weren’t the person I would just have fun with. You’re the person I could fall for, and we can’t have that… not now.”

She was a bit scared that her rambling would scare him off. Here he was, merely asking for a bit of fun with the girl he had met in a bar, and she was ranting about how she could imagine herself falling in love with him. God, this would surely scare him off, so perhaps this was good for her— wasn’t this what she wanted?

She knew she sounded insane, but she also knew who she was. She could manage her emotions well enough, but with someone as charming and kindhearted as Harry had been, she knew she would not be able to prevent herself from feeling for him. One night of fun would turn into calling him the next day, eventually leading to dates and her obsessing over the curly-haired lad.

He didn’t seemed too shakened by her words, though. In fact, he seemed to understand them better than she believed he could. He had recognized it when he first saw her, too. He knew he was not picking out some random girl from the bar, but someone who had intrigued him by her appearance then her smart banter. She allured him, and he wanted to dive into her— completely, if he could.

“Why not now?” He settled on asking instead of consoling her thoughts.

“Because…” She whispered, her eyes darting from the ground to his enchanting hues, “It’s a dangerous time to fall in love.”

A faint smile eased upon his lips, staring down at her with a knowing glint in his orbs, “There is never safety with falling in love.”

Her eyes raised to meet his at that, a bit stunned that he was comfortably approaching this topic with her. She had been so sure he would be freaked out by her worries. Here he was, though, still listening to her. Perhaps, he was the insane one.

“Still, we can’t,” She pushed herself to say the words, moving away from his grasp once more with a small step backwards. He could see her walls falling down, though. He recognized the way her mind was screaming at her to leave, but her body was desperately craving more.

She recognized it, too. Her brain was logically bringing up her fears and worries, but she felt herself growing weaker under his gaze. She imagined where else his hands could travel, farther from just her elbows. She wondered what the toned chest she had felt pressed against her own looked like. She wanted him. Badly.

“I lost my brother,” She admitted to him, wanting to give him an explanation for her fears. “I can’t lose somebody else, so I can’t get close to anybody— not now.”

“Yeh’ won’t lose me, love. M’right here.”

“You don’t know that,” She scoffed, “It could be anybody tomorrow.”

“Stop worryin’ about tomorrow, then. We have right now. ’S the beauty of life, isn’t it? Livin’ in the present mo’ and all tha’?” He stepped closer, watching as she bit down on her bottom lip.

“Why are yeh’ resisting something that yeh’ want?” He questioned her, index finger grazing her cheek as he tucked a strand of hair behind her ear.

She gulped, frowning as she attempted to regain control over the situation. But, the way his fingers grazed along her cheek had ignited a fire within her, had left a burning feeling throughout her, and she wanted more. She wanted more than innocent touches, but she wanted his hands digging into her hips as he pressed into her.

“Just fun, okay?” She whispered so quietly that he almost missed it.

He was a bit shocked that she had given in, thinking it would take more convincing but she stared up at him with a hard, determined gaze now.

“You can’t fall in love with me, and I can’t with you, got it? No calling me the next day, no asking to get lunch together, just… just one night together, and that’s it.”

His lips began to perk upwards, licking over his bottom lip. “Alright, if that’s what yeh’ want— as long as yeh’ won’t be askin’ me to cuddle you after, hm?”

She rolled her eyes at that, her hands lifting to grab at his shirt collar and tug him forward. “Trust me, Styles, I won’t be,” She shot back defiantly.

“We’ll see,” He hummed in response, his voice dropping lower than before as he leaned into her. His forehead was pressed against hers while their eyes met for one last time before he closed the gap and pressed their lips against one another.

Her fists around his shirt collar grew tighter, while his head tilted to the side, deepening the kiss. His hands had held her face in his large palms, holding her in a position he liked, so he could angle himself better in relation to her shorter figure.

The kiss was desperate and passionate— it was fiery and challenging, as if questioning which one would give up on their promise first, which one would succumb to the ecstasy of their bond sooner.

“Let’s go,” He murmured as he pulled away though his body was fighting against him, simply wanting to taste the softness of her lips against his once more. His hand dropped to intertwine with hers, the two sharing a soft smile before stumbling back into the alley during the dark night.

—— — — —

“Careful, love,” Harry warned her as she had her arms looped around his neck, pressing soft kisses along his jawline. His arm was wrapped around her waist, walking her inside his flat and making sure she wouldn’t bump into any walls. “Should be watching where yeh’re going, yeh’ know tha’?”

“You want me to stop then?” She questioned, pulling her head back to glance up at him with a questioning brow.

“Didn’t say tha’, did I?” He quipped back, lowering his head to leave a gentle kiss on her lips. He kicked the apartment door shut with his foot, his hand reaching back to lock it before moving back to its placement on her waist. “Proper minx, yeh’ are,” He murmured as she continued her assault on his neck.

Deciding he had had enough of her little fun and games on him, he thought it best to take control. Lifting her off her feet, he held her to his body with one arm wrapped around her waist while the other hand slid down to the back of her thigh. Her legs instinctively wrapped around his torso, ankles crossing against his back.

Their faces were leveled with one another as he leaned in to kiss her again but harder this time, not bothering to be soft and gentle because the fragile girl with her worries was left by the railroad tracks and was replaced by someone teasing and daunting.

He had recognized the shift when she attempted to give him a stiffy while he was merely trying to rush along their walk back to his apartment. But, no, she had to stop him in the middle of the sidewalk to kiss him again and run her hand down his chest towards his crotch. All that could stop her was a harsh grip on her wrist and a stern look, but even then, she was still daring.

The second they had gotten into the elevator, her lips were attached to his flesh— all the way up to his front door.

“Thought yeh’ could have all the fun, didn’t yeh? Get me all riled up fo’ what, hm?” Harry asked her as he walked her back to his bedroom, dropping her onto the mattress. Her back hit the cushioning while a soft gasp left her lips, not expecting it. “Not how it works wit’ me, angel. Yeh’ don’t get all the fun here.”

He began unbuttoning his shirt as he watched her big eyes trail from his own orbs to his toned chest. She bit down on her bottom lip, getting more eager for him as she moved to unbutton her own shirt. Slipping the fabric off her shoulders, she laid in her skirt, lifting her hips up to take that off, as well.

His hands paused at his belt buckle as he saw the sight of her in her white, cotton undergarments. She looked so pure and innocent like this, but he knew she was far from it.

“Such a pretty girl, aren’t yeh’?” He murmured, leaning down to cup her face with his hand. She hummed in response, her face leaning into his touch and lips pressing a soft kiss to his wrist. “Been a bad girl, though. Think it’s time yeh’ get taught a lesson, hm? What do yeh’ have to say fo’ that?”

She chewed on her bottom lip, suddenly at loss for words even though she had been a rambling mess earlier. Nodding her head slowly, he smirked at her, amused by the sudden submissiveness that washed over her, considering how bold she had been before.

“Turn over fo’ me,” He directed, watching as she obeyed his demands and moved to lay down on her stomach. Her head turned around to peer him at over her shoulder curiously, wondering what he possibly could want to do with her.

His large palm ran along her back down to her bum, tapping the flesh gently. “Pretty, little bum yeh’ got. Think it’d look even prettier with my handprints on them, what d’yeh think, doll?”

When he got no response from her besides a small gasp, his hand twisted into her hair to force her gaze on his own orbs. “Asked yeh’ a question, didn’t I?”

She nodded, at loss for words, as her cheeks had reddened drastically. Soon, her other pair of cheeks would match that color, too. “Y-Yes, it’d look prettier.”

He smirked at that, his hand releasing its grip on her hair and sliding back down. It happened in a quick second— one moment she was anticipating the impact, and the next a gasp was leaving her lips as her hips raised off the mattress. Her flesh stung from his hand, but she liked the feeling of it— the rapid pace of her heartbeat and the adrenaline surging throughout her.

“Such a good girl for me,” Harry murmured, more to himself, as his hand struck her bum once again. He did so a few more times, each time relishing in the soft whimpers and gasps that left the girl’s lips. Kneading the flesh in his palms, he massaged it soothingly. Deciding he had tortured her enough, he knelt down onto his knees.

Grabbing her ankles, he pulled her down the mattress till her legs dangled off the bed and his face was in line with her wetness. Moving her underwear to the side with his fingers, he leaned further into her, peppering kisses along the insides of her thighs.

Y/N anticipated his next move, feeling more than relieved when his lips met her wetness. Gasping at the first touch of his warm tongue against her clit, her hands shakily gripped the sheets. He sucked on her clit, tongue flicking over it before moving down to lick along her folds teasingly.

“Harry, please,” She forced out, hips pushing back further into him— body begging for more. He answered her pleas as his tongue slid past her folds into her, tasting her for the first time. His eyes shut as he hummed in content. She tasted as sweet as she looked.

A soft moan escaped from her flushed lips, head resting on its side as she tried to glance down at him. Though, as his tongue began to swirl against her walls and flick back and forth, her eyes fluttered shut, lashes resting on her cheeks.

He memorized the sound of her whimpers and moans, wanting to play it on a never-ending loop. “Taste so fuckin’ good for me, baby,” He told her as his fingers replaced his mouth by rubbing her folds up and down.

While, Y/N loved the feel and sensation of it all— she just wanted him. She wanted to cave into her desires and have him fully with no more playing around. “Please, Harry, I need you,” She whimpered, feeling his hand pause against her as he grinned smugly.

“Yeh’re having me, aren’t yeh?”

“You know what I mean,” She grumbled, cheeks pink as she felt too shy to say the words.

“Do I?” He tested her, grinning amusedly as she refused to let the filthy words pass her lips, so he helped her out, “Yeh’ want m’cock, is that it? Yeh’ wanna feel me pressed up inside yeh’ till yeh’re screaming for me?”

She whined at the thought, nodding her head hastily, “Fuck, please…”

Standing on his feet, he undressed himself entirely, shedding his boxers, as well. He reached towards his nightstand, grabbing a rubber and slowly putting it over his cock. He leaned down to kiss along the back of her shoulders before his hands unclasped her bra and peeled off the undergarment. Grabbing her by her hips, he flipped her over, so he could look into her eyes once more.

“Alright, yeh’ll have me then,” He promised her, pressing small kisses along her jawline before he positioned himself, slowly pushing into her. He forced himself to go slow, to give her time to breathe and adjust to his size. Her eyes had squeezed shut as he slipped inside her, mouth falling open as he continued to press into her until she had fully taken him.

“Yeh’ okay?” He asked her softly, eyes scanning her face for any painful or uncomfortable expressions. She nodded in response, hands moving to grasp onto his shoulders.

“Mm, keep going,” She assured him, as he moved his hands to rest on either sides of her face. He began to thrust into her, slowly but deeply as she threw her head back in bliss. Though as her moans grew louder, it edged him on.

He remembered how teasing she had been the entire night, and his thrusts got harder. “Open your eyes, want yeh’ to look at me,” He demanded, one hand going to cup her jaw as he tilted her head up and pressed his lips to hers hastily.

It was hard to do so, but she forced her eyes to peel open. She didn’t regret it once her own hues met his emerald ones, gazing at each other like there was nothing else going in the world except this very moment. There was no war, there was no bloodshed. It was only them and the passion flowing between them.

She moaned out his name as he pressed into her, thrusts quick and hard. She could feel him pressed up against her walls, hitting the one spot that had her eyes rolling to the back of her skull. “S-so close,” She warned him as he continued pushing into her.

Her toes curled as her back arched off the mattress, nails digging into his shoulders. If it hurt him, he made no effort to halt her from pressing her nails into his flesh. In fact, he seemed to enjoy the pain of it, just as she had liked his palms against her ass.

“Yeah? Yeh’ gonna come fo’ me? Alright, princess, come fo’ me,” He permitted her, his hand going down to rub against her clit in circles, helping her reach her brink as she came with a shrieking moan.

It didn’t take him long to cum after that, hearing the way she had let out one last whimpering moan. He spilled inside of the condom, pulling out shortly after as he rolled over to lay on his back beside her.

Both of them panted heavily, sweaty and breathless. There was merely silence, but it was a comfortable one— one neither one of them dared to break.

Instead, Harry peeled back the covers of his bed, covering it over both of them. He turned to his side, facing her, and shorty after, she did the same. They stared at each other without exchanging a word.

She didn’t have to ask him to hold her, because he already knew to do it. He wrapped his arm around her waist, pulling her close into his body. She didn’t argue or resist his grasp, but further snuggled into him by laying her head and hands against his chest.

They fell asleep, cuddling.

— — — — —

It was safe to say that after they had already broken one rule of theirs that night, many more failed to be followed.

The morning after, Harry had woken up to her resting comfortably in his arms. He smiled down at her peaceful, sleeping body and kissed her temple gently. He slowly took his arm off her, so not to wake her, and slid out of the bed quietly. He learned that she was a rather deep sleeper for even as he stumbled over their clothes on the floor, she remained asleep.

Smiling, he moved to his kitchen where he began fixing her a breakfast, despite her ordering him earlier not to do so. She wouldn’t mind though, he assured himself.

Soon enough, Y/N was being woken up to her body being softly shaken. Creaking her eyes open, she winced at the sunlight pouring through the windows only to see the lean figure before her. Moving to sit up on her elbows, she glanced down to see a tray being held out for her with a boiled egg and toast being prepared.

“Made you a cuppa’,” He offered her, setting the mug of tea on the nightstand beside her. She grinned softly up at him, grabbing the plate from him.

“Thank you, Harry, you didn’t have to,” She mumbled, rubbing her eyes with her fists. Glancing down, she realized she was still entirely naked and flushed. Harry seemed to notice for in an instant, he was offering her his shirt. Smiling up at him gratefully, she pulled the fabric over her body and allowed the material to fall against her thighs.

He joined her on the bed again, grabbing his own plate. The two ate their breakfasts, both ignoring the fact they had promised not to do this. They had promised not to grow an attachment, but they also refused to acknowledge their promise. It felt better to give into what they wanted.

Y/N was hesitant, but she didn’t want to ruin their morning. It was just a breakfast, that’s all. They would eat, and she would leave soon. Then, she would never see him again, just like they had agreed to. A night of fun, that’s all. Well, also a night of cuddling and a morning of breakfast.

It wasn’t long before they had finished their meals and worked to washed up, clean themselves from the filth they had acted in previously. Soon, Y/N was back in her orange attire and walking to the front door, with Harry falling closely behind her.

“Well, this was fun,” Y/N announced, her hand moving to open the front door as she swung it open and stepped out, before turning around to face him.

“Yeah, it was,” He agreed, nodding as he stared down at her. He bit down on his bottom lip as they stared at each other, unknowing of what to do. Silence settled upon them before she cleared her throat.

“Well, I’m gonna go then,” She told him.

“Right, okay. Get home safe, yeh?”

She nodded, turning on her heels and she sauntered towards the elevator. Disappointment settled throughout her, desperately wishing he would chase after her and coax her away from her fears. For, she so desperately wanted to see his green eyes again, more than just for a night.

Harry chewed down on his lip as he watched her retreating figure. He knew he should stick to his agreement and not chase after her, because that’s what she told him to do last night. But, hell, he hated to see her walk away like this.

So, he spoke up, “Can I call yeh’?”

Y/N paused in her tracks, surprised her wishes were being granted. A soft smile began to twitch along her lips. Her mind told her to say no and to walk away. This would just be another attachment that she did not need. He would leave like everyone else would. It was wartime, and it was dangerous. She lost her brother, she couldn’t deal with losing another. But, then she remembered his soft smile as he gazed at her in bed with his arms around her. She remembered his cheeky attitude and his determination to win her over, and she gave in.

Looking back at him, she nodded, “Yes, you can.”

A wide grin spread along his face, nodding back at her as she smiled towards him before walking to the elevators with relief flooding throughout her. This wouldn’t be the last time she would see him.

As she pressed the elevator button, he suddenly shouted to her, “Wait, I don’t have your number!”

“I’m in the book, (Y/N) (Y/LN)!” She shouted back at him as she stepped inside the elevator, the doors closing shut as he caught one more glance of her beaming figure.

Nodding to himself, he grinned widely as he stepped back inside the apartment and shut the door. Then, he moved over to the phonebook to find her name.

—— — — —

One phone call had led to dinner later that week which led to more dinners and more fun nights. It didn’t take long for them to grow attached, considering Harry even walked to her job after his shift from the factory was over, in order to walk her back to her loft.

It was February now, two months since they had met. They never brought up the conversation about their rules ever again since that night. It seemed like a promise worth forgetting, so they merely allowed it to fade away into oblivion. It was easier that way and more beneficial to them both, though perhaps not in long-term circumstances.

Y/N, of course, still dealt with the loss of her brother as a fresh wound. There were nights she couldn’t get a blink of sleep because she imagined his falling corpse on the battlefield. However, having Harry beside her in bed, with his arms securely wrapped around her in protection from the world around them, made it a lot easier to get through. So, while her mind screamed at her to end it before their bond grew, her body would relax into his as she kissed him goodnight.

There were days where she believed it would be alright. After all, not all the men in the country would be drafted for war, right? Just a bucket of them. Perhaps Harry would be lucky and fall short of belonging in that bucket.

He wouldn’t be drafted and they would stay exactly as they were right now, with her bare body being covered by her sheets and Harry stumbling back towards the bed after grabbing them both some water.

“Here, drink some,” He instructed her, holding out the glass as she sat up slowly, stretching.

“Wore me out today, H,” She teased him, though she particularly liked when he went rougher than usual. That only happened after a stressful day at the factory for Harry.

“Mm, sorry, button,” Harry apologized, but his smug grin said differently, causing her to nudge him with her elbow as he laid back down beside her. She took a sip of the cold water, savoring the taste before setting it down on the table next to her.

Shifting so she was laying on her side, she slung a leg over his and wrapped her dainty arms around his lower torso. Her fingertips drew shapes on his bare chest, pecking the skin softly. “Missed you today at work, everyone was looking at me like I didn’t belong,” She sighed quietly.

Harry frowned at that, his hand moving to run his fingers through her hair, which was a bit messy due to his tugging. He hated that Y/N had to go through that— hated that women, in general, had to face the blatant sexism in the workplace. He wanted to protect her from all those men working alongside her, but he knew she was strong enough to protect herself. Those men just never gave her the chance to prove herself and show that she was more than a domestic worker.

“Jus’ jealous of yeh’, petal. They know yeh’ could do their job so much better that they’re scared of yeh’, so they’d rather try to keep yeh’ out. Proper cowards, they are, the whole bloody bunch,” Harry assured her, his hand rubbing her arm reassuringly up and down in soft strokes.

She smiled at that, looking up at him with only admiration in her eyes. That was what she adored the most about Harry, his sense of consoling her as if it were a second nature to him. Every time she ranted about another mean man at work, her skirt getting dirty as she walked back home, or her cooking burning yet again, Harry always knew what to say to get that frown to transform into a grin. He didn’t even try, it was effortless.

“You’re the best, you know that?” She whispered, leaning up to kiss his lips gently. She rested her head on his chest afterwards, still tilting her head up to keep her gaze on him.

Harry shook his head, a fond smile on his lips. “I know tha’, love,” He quipped back, chuckling to himself as she huffed and rolled her eyes at him.

Her sweet, charming Harry also had quite the ego, and she learned that within a few days of knowing him. God, especially after that time he got especially rough with her, leaving her a trembling mess even as she tried to walk to the bathroom. He never stopped teasing her for that, how he had to help walk her to the bathroom because she was still shaking from their fuck.

“I hate you,” She joked as a smile was still written all over her face. She loved moments like these, laying with him and talking about anything.

Harry didn’t know why the next words that came out of his mouth did, but it seemed like a reflex to him, almost as effortless as comforting her, “Well, I love yeh’.”

They both paused at that, their bodies tensing up for opposite reasons. Harry tensed for he was afraid of scaring her away, knowing how uncomfortable and frightened commitment made her. Even though, they were together without ever announcing it, and would never be with somebody else rather than each other, it still scared her. So, he had left the topic behind, never daring to bring it up in fear of pushing her away. Yet, here he was, laying in bed with her and professing his love.

Y/N tensed up because this was the time her fears were finally confronted. All this time she had promised herself fun would not lead to attachment and commitments. It was easier to lie to herself rather than face the truth. The truth that she, too, loved Harry— she had fallen for him, just like she knew she would. And, while she had tried to prevent it before they first shared a bed together, afterwards, it got much harder to resist. So, she had caved in to her feelings and desires and allowed herself to betray her mind in falling for him.

Harry’s lips parted to say something else, to apologize… but for what? He wasn’t sorry for how he felt, he did love her. He loved her bratty, clumsy self. He loved that she pouted whenever she didn’t get a kiss goodbye in the mornings. He loved that she threw herself on his lap with a grumble after a particularly hard day at work. He loved that she still attempted to cook for him even though it always ended up burnt, so he would just cook up a new meal for them. He loved that she would launch herself onto his back when she was too tired to walk, forcing him to carry her around her apartment and retrieve whatever item she beckoned for.

So, he couldn’t apologize for loving her, because it was truly how he felt. He was only sorry that she was so afraid of love, so afraid of where it could lead them. He was sorry that he couldn’t protect her from the losses war brings.

But, before he could ramble out any apologies or whatever nonsense would spurt out of his mind, she cut him off with her own soft, quiet murmur, “I love you too, H.”

His eyes widened in shock. He was certain she would scramble off his body and kick him out of her flat. Instead, here she was, confirming that she, indeed, felt the same way for him.

She loved him for his idiotic, cheesy jokes that still had her giggling, moreso at the corniness of it rather than the joke. She loved him for the way he sang to her, reminding her that she would one day see him up on the stages like he dreamed to be. She loved him for the way he still tried to eat her burnt meals before she would feel too guilty and throw it away, allowing him to be the chef once more. She loved him for always supporting her, quite literally too, as she often threw herself on his back, mostly because she liked the feeling of being tall.

His smile could not be erased from his face after those words left her lips. Instead, he flipped them over, attacking her face with kisses before leading them down to her neck. “Love yeh’,” He would repeat after every few kisses, loving the sound of her giggles fleeing from her lips as his scruff tickled her neck.

He pulled back after a few moments, staring into her eyes as he pressed one last kiss to her nose.

“Love you,” She responded shortly after, the two beaming up at each other. They fell asleep like that, soft smiles meeting one another as they continued to converse about their days. Every so often, they would remind each other of their love for one another.

— — — — —

The next day, both of their moods could not possibly be crushed. Harry, especially, felt as if he were flying on cloud nine. After all, the girl he had trouble winning over at first had just admitted to loving him back.

He truly believed nothing could destroy his mood, that was, of course, until he got home. Seeing the letter on his doorstep was confusing enough, but seeing it sealed by the British government had his heart thundering in his chest.

Y/N had waited for about twenty minutes after her workday was over for him. He usually came by to walk her back home. Though, he hadn’t promised to do so today. He never did promise, though, he just showed up without needing to be told or asked. It left her a bit worried about whether he was alright or not. She assured herself he was, but she had to make sure. It wasn’t like Harry to skip out on her.

That’s what had her walking towards his apartment in a rushed pace. It didn’t take her long to be knocking on his front door. And when she did, Harry already knew who it would be. He didn’t want to talk to anybody right now, too shocked with the news to truly deal with it. But, he knew he couldn’t avoid her. He was just afraid of how she would feel. Her fears had come true, and he couldn’t do anything to stop it.

“Come in,” He yelled from his living room, voice a bit a raspy and hoarse as he sat with his head in his palms and elbows resting on his knees.

That’s when she knew something was really wrong. Harry never missed a chance on being a gentleman, so she knew him not coming up to greet her was a clear sign something had occurred. Her stomach twisted as she walked inside to spot his distressed figure on his couch.

“Harry… you didn’t come to get me, I got worried,” She started, setting her purse down on his counter before sauntering over to him. She sat down on the table in front of him, hands resting on top of his knees beside his elbows. “What’s wrong?”

“M’so sorry, love, I…” He trailed off, taking a deep breath as he gulped the lump forming in his throat.

“Hey, what’re you talking about? C’mon, H, talk to me,” She pushed, her voice soft and gentle as she tried to catch his eyes but he looked away. He moved so his back was slumped against the couch, head tilting upwards to stare at the ceiling, which is when she noticed the red outlining his hues.

Worry stirred deep inside her as she moved to sit on his lap, straddling his thighs as she grabbed a hold of his chin and forced his head to look down at her. “Harry, baby, you can talk to me, you know that, right? I wanna help you, hate seeing you like this,” She frowned, pressing a soft kiss on his cheek.

“Got a letter today,” He forced out unevenly, his eyes moving to glance over at the letter sitting beside him. She rose her brow, a bit confused, but reached for the envelope anyways. She pulled the letter out, her eyes scanning over it, until the words finally sunk into her mind.

He had been enlisted.

“W-What?” She breathed out, rereading the letter to make sure she hadn’t messed up, that it was true. That her fears and worries had come true, and her Harry was being sent away, just a day after they confessed their love for one another. But, she was moreso worried about him. Her sweet Harry dressed up in a military attire, standing alongside other soldiers as he engaged in warfare. Killing was not a thing Harry was designed for, she couldn’t imagine the kindhearted man to ever have that violent tendency within him.

Forcing herself to remain calm, she knew she had to be strong for him. If she showed worry, if she showed fear, it would only worsen his mood. For the countless times he had been there for her, it was her time to be there for him. She would worry about her own fears later, but right now, she would listen to his.

She set the letter down, trying to control her breathing as she moved her gaze back to him. He was finally looking at her. “Talk to me, tell me what you’re thinking,” She started, her hands cupping his face in her palms softly.

He was a bit stunned at her reaction, fully expecting to see her wobbly lip and watering eyes. But, he recognized the strength inside her, and he couldn’t appreciate it enough. He hardly had the strength inside to keep himself from tears, he wouldn’t know how to do the same for her.

“Wasn’t supposed to happen, s’all. I was a student at university when the conscription first came along, which kept me exempted. Only a few weeks after, I had to drop out, cus’ of money issues. S’why I’m working at the factory now, trying to make some money so I can go back one day. I-I thought they wouldn’t know, wouldn't find out I left university, but they are the bloody government, aren’t they?” He scoffed, shaking his head as his hands cautiously moved to hold onto her waist. “Came home today to see this letter, that I’ve been enlisted now that m’no longer a student. Have to go for training, then they’re shipping me off to someplace where I’ll be killing people I don’t even know.” His eyes were watering once again at the thought, and it hurt Y/N to see him in so much agony.

He hadn’t even gone to war yet, but he was already mourning the actions of what he would soon be doing. Y/N pushed his head into her chest, holding him close to her as his arms tightened around her waist, clutching onto her as if she were the last piece that was keeping him here— safe at home, and not bloody in a battlefield.

That’s when the tears finally sprung to her eyes, falling down her cheeks slowly as she sniffled. His grip tightened around her as he heard that, hand rubbing circles on her back soothingly. “M’sorry, button. I told yeh’ that yeh’ wouldn’t lose me, made yeh’ come to dinner with me after promising yeh’ just one night, and I fell in love with yeh’ just like yeh’ knew would happen. And now, I’m being forced to go and leave yeh’ here. It’s all so fucked up, I…”

She cut him off, lifting his head so their eyes met and shook her head. “Harry, it’s not your fault. You didn’t start any wars, and you didn’t ask to be a part of it. You didn’t make me grow attached to you, I did that by myself for continuing to see you. I wanted to, and I don’t regret it, okay? But, don’t… don’t say I’m going to lose you, okay? I’m not going to lose you, you’re going to come back to me.” Her voice cracked by the end at merely the thought.

He nodded his head firmly at the thought, leaning up to press a firm kiss on her lips. “Yeh’ won’t lose me, promise.”

Y/N nodded in response, her body sinking down so her head was now pressed against his chest. She cried into his shirt as he held her. It continued like this for a while, both of them crying and taking turns with holding one another. They were both scared and upset, unknowing of what would happen to them. They did know one thing, though: they loved each other, and they wouldn’t give up on that, ever.

— — — — —

The pair walked together, hands entwined and clinging to one another desperately. Their anxieties increased as they reached the train station destined for London where Harry would begin his training. Five minutes left.

“Alright,” Harry breathed out, turning to glance down at her with a sad smile on his lips.

Though she desperately tried to hold back the tears, they came flooding in anyways, which didn’t help Harry’s upset mood much either. They had attempted to prepare for this the best they could, making love to each other last night until they grew too tired and stared at each other for the rest of the night.

Neither of them slept, too scared on missing out on their final moments together for who knew how long. They cried, laughed, smiled, and reminded each other of how much love they had between them. They were terrified, but they promised each other to be strong and to keep pushing forward. Pushing forward was the only way they could make it out of this.

“C’mon, poppet, know I hate to see yeh’ cry,” Harry cooed as he pulled her into his arms, his chin resting on top of her head as he squeezed his eyes shut, few tears slipping by. She sniffled, nodding, as she wrapped her arms around him and attempted to brush away her tears, using his shirt.

“S-Sorry,” She whispered, hiccuping shortly after as sobs wracked throughout her.

“Shh, baby, no apologizing,” He reminded her, pulling back to grab her face in his palms and wipe away the tears with his thumbs. “What’d we decide on, hm? Need to be strong fo’ me, doll, right? I can only be strong out there if I know yeh’re holding up back here.”

Y/N nodded at that, her hands resting over his as she nestled her face into his touch and left a kiss against his wrist gently. “I k-know, I’ll be strong for you, I promise. Just, please, be safe and don’t do anything dumb because you’re trying to be heroic, okay? Need you to come back to me, H,” She urged, eyes searching his.

Harry’s lips twisted upwards into a smile, or as much of a smile it could possibly be at this moment, as he nodded. “M’coming back to yeh’, petal. M’not missing out on seeing yeh’ conquer your own business or yeh’ finally becoming a good cook,” He promised her to which she let out a soft laugh at, shaking her head.

Two more minutes. Y/N turned to glance around them as other couples and families were bidding their loved ones goodbye. Sadness surged throughout the atmosphere as tears ran down innocent faces, loved ones being kissed for the last time before they would rest their eyes for eternity. It was a hopeless scene, there was nothing anyone could do to save the future from occurring.

“I should let you go, then,” She slowly spoke, biting down on her bottom lip as he nodded hesitantly.

He leaned down to kiss her once more, their lips meeting one another in a soft, gentle touch with no rush. It was only them and this moment. There was nothing else surrounding them besides this. They pulled away from each other with much resistance, tears filling their eyes but not allowing them to leak.

“I love yeh’, (Y/N),” He told her firmly.

“I love you, Harry,” She responded with no hesitation.

He let his hands drop from her face slowly, hands reaching for one another for a final time as she squeezed his palm gently and his thumb ran over the back of her hand soothingly. He picked up his duffel bag, stepping inside the train and turning back to wave at her. She waved back, a sad smile on her lips as the tears poured down once more.

She watched him settle inside the train, sitting by the window with a bag on the either side of him.

Their eyes met once more, as the train’s horns went off, signaling its departure.

And, their gaze never broke until the train was too far out of reach for her to spot him anymore.

#harry styles #harry styles writing #harry styles blurb #harry styles angst #harry styles smut #harry styles fluff #harry styles smut writing #daddy harry styles #writing #harry styles one shot #harry styles fic #harry styles imagine #harry #styles #masterlist #harry styles au #harry styles dirty

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andddromeda · 5 years

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amore a mezzanotte [ part 1 ]

genre: fluff??? some angst bc i ended up projecting a lil at the end?? characters: bucciarati & reader ft. team bucciarati and my irl friends bc why not word count: 3242 summary: a week in summery italy felt like the best thing to do after your first year in university to unwind from the stress of finals and university life in general. what you didn’t expect was to feel so enraptured by one of your tour guides. a/n: i always seem to spawn story ideas from my daydreams lmaooo thats probably why im projecting so hard on all of my fic ;;; also ive just had this in my docs for a really long time (after editing i just like left it alone for like weeks) that i thought that i might as well just post it now so yeah!! (pls forgive any grammar or spelling errors, i got too lazy to really fix anything anymore)

Bustling excitement filled the plane as the pilot had brought it to a rolling stop, people swam into the aisle for a chance to get off before anyone else, babies cried at the sudden commotion, a fiasco that took about fifteen minutes before you could even stand into the aisle to exit. Eventually coming off the plane, you were greeted by the blinding sunlight and the burning heat so characteristic of Rome in the summertime. The humid Roman heat left you tacky, your skin unable to breathe under the thin layer of sweat that was beginning to form. The twenty hour trip you and your friends endured was torturous, leaving your joints stiff and your friends begging for a cold water bottle to chug down. Your fatigued body burned under the sun as you and the friends you travelled with stepped out of the plane and onto the tarmac. But as you stepped onto the walkway that led into the airport, your heart filled with an immense appetite to see the things Italy had to offer, dispelling the fatigue you felt through the two layovers and the long flights. Despite your aching and jetlagged body, and theirs, you rushed to pull your friends along, impatient to get to the luggage carousel and out into the city, wishing settle into the hotel as quickly as possible and to savor the climate and sights before sun down.

Summer was the needed break from a hectic first year at university, and it gave you and the friends you made a chance to have a kind of fun together that never gave itself the chance during the school year. You were all so excited to spend a week in Italy together that staying in cheap hotels didn’t even matter; finding a cheap bundle for a tour guide and hotels kept your wallets sighing with relief, and one of your friends having already visited the summer before meant that at least someone knew where they were going so there was no need to splurge on overpriced tours. Just being in Italy, having your feet planted on the ground after a long, shakey 20-hour flight, you felt the most relief you’ve ever felt in the past nine months despite the jetlag.

Leaving the walkway and entering the greater airport area made your heart swell up even more, excitement pounding at your ribcage, shaking your entire body. You couldn’t pull on your friends any harder as they tripped over their own feet trying to match your pace, shouting for you to slow down and that the city wasn’t going to go anywhere without you. Even after retrieving your luggage, you were bouncing to where your tour guide group was supposed to meet the four of you, your anticipation building with every minute that your friends dawdled. Through the automatic sliding doors were crowds of people holding signs printed in various languages, no doubt the names of the people they were meant to pick up that day. Your eyes darted around the crowd scanning for your name printed in big bold letters, and a group of six men stuck out from the rest as they weren’t dressed in the black suit and tie like many of the chauffeurs were. In the middle of them was a raven-haired man holding the sign with your name printed large.

His expression was serious and his azure eyes were piercing, spottable in the chaos of people, yet you couldn’t help but stop in the middle of it all and take a moment to stare at how clear his eyes were-- like the familiar Lake Tahoe only an hour away from campus year round as it reflected the sparkly blue skies. This time your heart swelled with something other than anticipation; you could feel a heat burn your cheeks, and you convinced yourself that it was just the summer air and some early signs of heat exhaustion. Your eyes couldn’t help but run across the rest of the man’s stoic face, taking in every chiseled feature-- his lips stretched thin, his clenched jaw relaxing, his sharp cheekbones and jawline. Even that god awful bob that his hair was cut into looked good framing his face. It wasn’t until your friends had caught up to you that you realized that you were just gawking at a stranger in the middle of a sea of people. But in just a moment, your friends also spotted the tour group and the man holding the piece of paper with your name on it and began to stare just as you did, even only a little.

You began to walk towards the tour group, as that appetite to see Rome gripped you again, and called for your friends to follow. As you grew closer, you were able to take a better look at the six that were supposed to tour you around Italy for the next week. They were clad in oddly fashionable wear-- one even in a holey green suit-- and were fit and tall. You would be lying if you said you weren’t intimidated by them even just a little, so much so that, at the sight of a lavender-haired man’s glare, you shrunk back slightly when you went to wave to the group. Now in front of them, they towered over you, wondering how your 5’2” friend would feel standing next to these giants. When the man you were admiring just moments before noticed your wave, his expression softened and a sweet smile formed across his face. Butterflies grew in your stomach, keeping any words from coming up. With such a gentle smile, you couldn’t help but think that he had just become even more attractive, and no doubt your friends behind you thought the same.

“Are you Signorina ( Y/N )?” His voice was velvety, sweet, and sharp at the same time, what swam around in your stomach becoming a raging mess of nervousness, attraction, and-- it occurred to you days later-- desire. You could feel that want to explore Italy intensify, only if this man were the one showing you around. You nodded in response to him, just as your friends caught up to you, because you feared that if you said anything, what you felt right then would’ve been obvious to the rest of his group at just a squeak out of your mouth. In your state, you hadn’t even noticed that he spoke perfect English.

“And this is the rest of your group then?” He gestured to your friends behind you, and this time, as they also heard his voice, couldn’t help but react similarly to you: one of them inhaling sharply, you heard an audible “Ooh” followed by a chuckle, and the last you heard give out a comment about how his voice matched his face. You cleared your throat of any lingering butterflies, and to silence your friends, and turned to introduce them.

Your tall, blonde friend Anna, who had made the comment that the raven-haired man no doubt heard, introduced herself first with a bubbly outburst and wide grin, and she wasted no time making a groan-worthy pun that no doubt made everyone, especially the lavender-haired man, roll their eyes. Second was your 5’2” brunette friend Alex, whose sharp inhale you recognized as hers, and introduced herself with a flash of a smile and a quick wave. Your friend Megan, petite and with silver-tipped hair, who was the one to audibly ogle, introduced herself last with a flip of her hair and a cute grin.

Lastly, you introduced yourself. “And I’m ( Y/N ). It’s nice to meet you all!” You gave them a nervous smile, still not over your butterflies, and thanked them in advance for taking them around Italy.

“No worries, it’s our pleasure,” the raven-haired man said as he too turned to face his group to introduce them individually.

You learned that the man in the green, holey suit was named Pannacotta Fugo, that you could just call him by his last name, and that the short girl-ish boy next to him was named Narancia Ghirga, wearing a similar grin that Anna had on her face when she introduced herself. The man who shot you a glare earlier was named Leone Abbacchio, who demanded that you call him by his last name only, and that he meant no harm, that he was just wary of strangers, that it was no problem as long as you didn’t go out of your way to annoy him (followed by chuckles throughout the group). The man with the odd hat (cap?) was named Guido Mista, who said he preferred to also be called by his last name though didn’t mind either way, raising an interested eyebrow at Megan. And the blonde was named Giorno Giovanna, who only smiled and waved. An interesting bunch, you thought, as the leader, you assumed, introduced himself last.

“And I’m Bruno Bucciarati, and you can address me however feels comfortable. It’s a pleasure to meet all of you.” His smile never wavered through his introductions. Your eyes began to curiously scan the faces of Bucciarati’s friends, and you noticed that they were all fairly attractive, wondering how you four got so lucky. You figured that Megan would want a moment with Giorno and Fugo particularly, as they seemed her type, that Anna would love hanging out with Mista and Narancia, as they seemed like the rowdy bunch she could get along with, and that Alex would love Abbacchio, as she had a huge hard on for angsty types.

Even you can just acknowledge a person’s physical attractiveness, but as you looked back to Bucciarati, you couldn’t help but feel something else for him. As if you wanted his eyes on you and you alone. You tried to blink away the thought immediately after thinking it, feeling almost indecent that you would even consider the idea that this god of a man would want anything from you but your money. You turned away from him to hide the flush across your cheeks and towards your friends, suggesting that you all head to the hotel if everyone was ready. To your ignorance, they all noticed you staring at Bucciarati again and the look of embarrassment painted pink on your face and kept in mind that they could have a little fun and use this to tease you later on. Anna had the slyest grin across her face-- you knew as signature of her brainstorming a sneaky plan to reveal who knows when-- as she patted you on the back, and agreed that you should all head to the hotel before one of them passed out from exhaustion, heat, or both. The other two agreed to go to the hotel to rest a bit and freshen up, and you addressed Bucciarati, though not bringing yourself to look him in the eyes.

“In the bundle we paid for, it said that transportation would be provided,” you stated, looking around for a van or any other type of vehicle or just anywhere but directly at him.

“Yes, we’ll act as chauffeurs as well as tour guides,” he began to explain. “However, travelling in a large vehicle isn’t very convenient in Italy so we’ve prepared two cars with five seats each.” Looking to the rest of your group, he continued, “I assume that you would want to be in the same car together, so in one car will be my men and in the other will be you four and myself.” At the declaration that Bruno Bucciarati would be the one to accompany you and your friends in the same car, your heart almost lept out of your chest. Excitement crept up your arms but nervousness floated in your stomach-- who would sit where? Should you call shotgun? Would one of your other friends claim the seat next to Bucciarati for a chance at the cute Italian man? Swarming thoughts occupied you as he guided the four of you to the car and even up until you all had your bags packed into the trunks of the two cars. It wasn’t until the slam of the trunk door had you finally coming to your senses, glancing to your three friends.

“Who wants to sit in the back?” You asked them as they debated amongst themselves.

“Well since Megan’s small, she can be in between Alex and I,” Anna announced before anyone could say anything and everyone else agreed to that, knowing of your little crush on your driver and wanting more material to use to tease you later that night. You caught the sight of a sly grin on her face, finally realizing that the three of them clearly knew, and your lips curled into a sheepish smile, a little embarrassed that your little secret was found out. You agreed as well and climbed into the passenger’s seat.

The drive to the hotel that came in the bundle you paid for was about fifteen minutes after you gave Bucciarati the address, but it felt like the longest fifteen minutes you’ve had to endure in your life. In between the awkward start ups at conversation and the quiet giggles from whispered jokes in the back, you stole glances at Bucciarati when you knew he couldn’t see, even in his peripheral. Being this close to him allowed for you to see every minor detail in his face. The slight wrinkles under his eyes showed the tiredness of having to work since a young age, the faint lines across his forehead showed the stress despite how he looked only twenty years old or so. His eyes looked so clear earlier, but the distanced look in his eyes told you that his mind was somewhere else at that moment. His lips were once again pressed thin and his jaw was clenched. He looked like a man who had the world carried on his shoulders, like a man who was the only one who could. You recalled how serious he seemed when you met him. You credited it to professionalism, but the rest of his team didn’t match it. It made you wonder if it really was hospitality or if this serious look on his face indicated something else. Not that it really mattered to wonder about these things. You had a tendency to overthink just about anything, clearly even a stranger’s expression.

He would occasionally catch your glance, and at those moments, you’d turn to look out the window in embarrassment, cheek in the palm of your hand to feign disinterest. You really should’ve just been looking outside at the city, you knew, but each opportunity to look at Bucciarati felt like a gift, as if he was the real view Italy had to offer, as if that was what you had paid to come to this country to see. Each time he’d notice you staring, you would hear him huff in amusement, going back to concentrating on the road not too long after. And the cycle would repeat, much to the pleasure of your friends in the back watching everything: glance for a minute, turn to the window to hide a blush, followed by silent giggles from behind. You were glad your friends found it entertaining, but fifteen minutes couldn’t pass by more quickly even if the beating of your heart and the shake in your legs wanted this to last forever. After your last look at Bucciarati, your eyes laid on a hedge arch outside the car window which led into a courtyard littered with tables under awnings, one of which read “Hotel”.

When your driver announced your arrival, your friends didn’t hesitate to pop out of the car, scrambling for their bags so they could quickly check in and relax. In the excitement, they completely forgot that there was another car they had to wait for and made their way into the lobby to have a look around. You followed but stayed to wait for everyone else, thanking Bucciarati as he also stepped out of the car. He gave you a smile that made your heart skip one if not two beats, saying that the other car should be there soon so you could retrieve your luggage. He walked around the car and stood beside you on the cobblestone sidewalk to wait as well. You two were separated by only a few centimeters when he came to rest next to you; you could almost feel the fabric of his white suit against the exposed skin of your shoulder, and you could faintly smell the cologne he was wearing in the slight breeze that passed by. In your closeness, you could hear your heart thrumming in your ears, you could feel your palms grow damp, you could feel the redness in your face that you blamed the Italian summer for. But before you could collapse, from heat stroke or something else, Giorno pulled up and parked behind Bucciarati’s car as you quietly thanked God, rushing to the trunk to pull your things out. You said nothing to Bucciarati or his team as you raced to reunite with your friends so that the four of you could get checked in as soon as possible.

You only booked one room for the four of you, as you could all share the two beds and one couch that the room came with. When the receptionist gave you the room number and the two keys it came with, you heard Bucciarati announce to the four of you that him and his group would also be staying in the same hotel for your convenience. You nodded and gave him your room number on the fourth floor when he told you that they were staying on the fifth. And just as quickly as you had at the airport, you grabbed ahold of your friends and pushed them to the elevator and on your way to the fourth floor, absolutely ready for a hot shower to melt away your jetlag and calm the fluttering in your stomach. This time, they weren’t as resistant, actually excited to get into the room to flop onto the beds and relax their tense muscles. But before you four got into the elevator, Megan asked for a moment, rushing up to Bucciarati.

“Could I get your phone number?” You heard her say, mentioning how she paid for international calling, and your heart sunk to your stomach, churning in the bubbling acid below, fizzling away any butterflies you had left. “Just so we can tell you when we’re ready to head out again.” And he agreed, typing in his number into her phone as you just quietly begged to get to the room already. You saw his lips move as he talked to her, but your mind was elsewhere-- how you didn’t have a chance since everyone loved Megan everywhere you went, how it was stupid of you to think that you even had a chance, how you shouldn’t have hoped for anything because this was a trip for you and your friends to enjoy together, how you had always had that tiny wish in your heart for a romcom-style fantasy where you fell in love with a foreign country, how you were foolish for wanting that. You watched as she walked back, and you turned to press the button to call the lift, all the while just hoping that a shower could keep you from feeling any worse.

#bruno buccellati #bruno bucciarati #vento aureo #jjba #reader insert #buccellati x reader #bucciarati x reader #idk what else to tag it so uh yeah #i /was/ gonna write a second part but i kinda lost inspo for it soooo uhhhhhhh #idk i might pick this back up later probs in the summer when im not swamped with really late midterms and finals coming up

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surveys-at-your-service · 5 years

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Survey #175

“imagine living like a king someday, a single night without a ghost in the walls.”

Have you ever had a teacher hit on you? Not to my recollection. Have you ever seen your ex’s new partner? If so, what do you think of them? I don't know or care if he currently has one. Do you think you can last in a relationship for 6 months? Done it twice now, it's not difficult if you're picky and serious with who you date. Does anybody know about your sex life other than your partners? Well my mom was somewhat aware of things that were happening. What was the last piece of candy you ate? Good question. I got my tongue re-pierced because of a bar length issue with swelling, and now this one is just shy of long enough to disable me from biting down entirely (they're snake eyes, so across the tip). I'm only just getting back into eating soft things very slowly unless I want pain, so candy's a no. I have to wait no less than three weeks to get a correctly-sized bar, and it's only been just over one aaaahhh. Have you ever been dared to do something you totally regretted? No. Is your room painted or wallpapered? Painted. What is the best kind of pizza in your opinion? I'm an American I stan them meat lovers. Is there something that someone has done to you that you cannot forgive? No. Well actually idk, I still don't know for *sure* if I forgive him. Like I'm completely over it and it no longer affects me, but I could never ever ever ever look at him even remotely the same or even consider trusting him. I don't think that's supposed to happen when you forgive someone. Have you ever broken a plate/bowl? Accidentally by dropping. What is your favorite restaurant? Olive Garden. Has anyone ever drunk called/texted you? I don't think so. Do you know anyone who has a homosexual parent? No. What type of music could this world live without? Pure screamo (no, not as a carpet term for metal). Are any of your pets “overweight”? No. Who’s the last person you cried over? Does myself count? Did the house you grew up in have a fence? Yeah, but not all around. What’s your YouTube channel name? 0zzkat. Who of your FB friends has the cutest toddler(s)? Uhhhh idk. Anastasia's baby girl is pretty cute, I guess. Did you decorate pumpkins this year? No. :/ They were totally gone the day we were gonna get one (the day before Halloween so no, we weren't that surprised lmao). What’s the craziest color you’d dye your hair? More like what color WOULDN'T I dye it? What’s the coolest hobby one of your friends has? Uhhh. Idk. Name a video game you can play over and over again? Shadow of the Colossus. I've beaten it around 30 times. Would be more if I didn't lose the disc, buuut it's actually coming in the mail now! What is something that will make you laugh instantly? Don't show me that fucking Linkin Park "crawling in my crawl" worm video. Name a movie you wouldn’t watch solely based on its name? None come to mind. What’s your dearest souvenir? *shrugs* What was the last strong scent you smelled? Probably coffee bc of Mom. Have you ever been in an unconventional relationship (long distance, polyamorous, same gender, age gap, etc)? If so, what challenges did this relationship present, and were they worth overcoming? Long instance + same-sex simultaneously. Distance is fucking hard when you really want each other's company, especially for emotional support. Being same-sex makes me nervous due to potential violent homophobics, especiiiiaaaally living where I do. I do it regardless, but even just holding hands leaves me worrying some asshole is going to cause a problem. I know my sister's husband isn't at all fond of it either and I'm 99% sure he's why Sara's never met the kids. But anyway, all those things are absolutely worth it. Would you ever consider something like a poly relationship, assuming everyone involved was alright with it? What are some things you think you would or wouldn’t like about it? Absolutely not, because I strictly believe in the exclusiveness of love. What is the most unhealthy relationship (whether friendship or romantic) you’ve ever had? What made it so unhealthy? Do you still talk to each other? Colleen, probably. We are just about the antitheses of each other, yet we were "best friends." We disagreed too frequently, she was drama-ravenous, we kept leaving and coming back, etc. No, we don't talk now, and I refuse to ever do so again as friends. Have you ever been abusive in any way? Were you able to change or make amends, or, in general, what do you think people should do to make amends in that situation? No. I absolutely do not believe in "making amends" with your abuser. Keep them the fuck out of your life. Have you ever forgiven someone for being abusive or allowed someone toxic back into your life? Did this person change for the better or not? Toxic... you mean Colleen? Did it too many times, and no, she didn't. Do you feel like your age matches your emotional development? If not, what age level or maturity level do you feel best represents where you’re at? Part of me says no, another says yes. I guess it depends on the subject. What is one thing about your personality that embarrasses you, but you can’t seem to change it no matter how hard you try? Have other people called you out on this embarrassing thing? Being socially awkward as all hell, and yes. When was the last time you did something “meant” for children? Do you think it’s okay for adults to do these things (ie. watch cartoons, have stuffed animals, dress in cute clothing, etc), or do you think there’s an age beyond which it becomes unacceptable - and if so, why? I was playing Spyro just earlier today lmao. In almost all cases, no. I do believe that something like a full-grown adult playing pretend with dolls or something may be questionable, but even then there's not a real reason I can give you. What was the last thing to “trigger” you (as in, in a true mental health sense, I’m being serious here) and how did you cope with it? What kinds of things do you tend to find triggering? What do you do either avoid or face your triggers? Something PTSD-related, but I can't remember exactly what it was, I guess because I got past it pretty quickly. There are certain songs I should avoid, I canNOT look at the medicine I ODed on, I don't like seeing or being near large knives at all... If you’re diagnosed with anything, do you feel that it accurately represents what you’re experiencing? All of them, yeah. What is a complaint you have about the mental health industry or about the type of treatment you’ve received from a mental health service? Have you ever had any particularly bad therapy experiences? I feel that too many people working in the field care far more about the pay than the people. I can't guarantee a professional truly cared about what I was dealing with until Holly Hill. I've had one particularly horrible psychiatrist that threw diagnoses and pills around like they were nothing (the most ridiculous being ADHD, which I in no way exhibited), and a long-time therapist I had was pretty bad, something I realized only after I started with my current one. She was strict about that "you've got an hour, you're staying an hour, you're leaving no later" shit, and we always ran out of things to talk about so I'd just be sitting there super uncomfortably and numerous times start crying because I felt so awkward, and she'd just take it as a sign that I wasn't telling her something. She drove "and how does that make you feel" and "what're you thinking of" into the goddamn ground. Yeesh, having been a mental health patient for so long, I could really write a novel here. When was the last time you realized you might be the source of a problem and NOT someone else? Hm, idk. I'm so uninvolved with others that that's a hard question to answer. What are some minor physical discomforts that really bug you (eyelash in your eye, a wedgie, rumpled socks, etc)? HAVING THE BOTTOMS OF YOUR PANTS GET WET. I hate chapped lips, too. Do you prefer vertical or horizontal stripes? Horizontal. Have you ever ridden a motorcycle? No. Are you ticklish? YEAH. Have you ever tried to make your own alcohol? No. If you were to join one of the armed forces, which would it be? I wouldn’t. Have you ever been in a submarine? No. Have you ever been in a hot tub or sauna? Only hot tubs. Do you believe there used to be dragons? No. What was your first alcoholic drink? A Mike's hard lemonade. Where did you go on your first ride on an airplane? Idk, I was a baby. What was your first detention for? Too many tardies. Did you ever have a treehouse as a kid? No. Have you ever been on radio? No. How long has your longest ever phone call been? A few hours. What is a meal you eat extremely often? Or do your meals & food choices vary a lot? Ummm I guess some kind of chicken is common? When was the last time you felt unable or unwilling to speak your mind to someone? Idk. What was the last thing you changed your mind about? Uhhhh how am I blanking, I change my mind on things every five minutes. Who was the last friend you saw, and what did you do together? Sara's both my girlfriend but also the only "friend" I ever hang with now even tho we live several states apart lmao. I was there two weeks, so we did an array of stuff. Who tends to show up in your dreams? Do you ever wonder if you appear in anyone else’s dreams? Hell, I barely ever remember my dreams. Jason still shows up maybe ehhhh around or maybe less than once a month, and I have no clue why other than maybe there's some PTSD effects I don't actually detect or something? It's not like I think about him much, so I really don't see why he shows up, but the theme is constant: awkwardness seeing each other again, and he sometimes tries to get back with me (thank FUCKING GOD even in my dreams, I don't). Sara's in some dreams that I remember. Mom, maybe. What is something you wish you could say to someone who is no longer in your life, or something you wish they could know? Nothing. What is something you do to feel better when you’re scared? I'll usually turn to YouTube for a distraction. Who do you feel you can count on the most in life? Is there anyone you wish you could count on more? Mom. What is the strangest book you have ever read? How did you find out about it? Probably Bite Me by idr-who. I actually don't remember. What was the last thing you broke? How about fixed? Another sensor came off the keyboard. :') I dunno about fixed. Is there a sign or symbol that means a lot to you for whatever reason (eg. seeing certain animals or birds, 11:11 or other repeating numbers, syncs, butterflies, hearts in nature, etc)? Butterflies and semicolons. Hence my semicolon butterfly tattoo. Do you have any personal ghost stories or paranormal experiences? Yeah. What do you get complimented on the most? My hair. What is something unusual that you find attractive? why does?????? everyone hate fedoras tbh?????????? What time do you tend to eat your first meal of the day? And your last? BOY this varies so much like fuck. Sometimes I don't eat breakfast at all, sometimes I do right when I get outta bed. Dinner can be at like almost 10:00 with Mom's schedule, or I may have it like five hours earlier. What was the subject of the last video you watched? I'm getting into a horror LPer and I'm binging her Silent Hill playthroughs. How would you describe your overall aesthetic? I like pink but bloody guts and brains are cool 2. What is the most challenging meal you have ever cooked? N/A What was your favorite thing to do as a little kid? Play video/computer games. Have you ever been close to drowning? No. Do you watch any Japanese anime? Not currently, but I've kinda had the urge to pick an interesting one up? Do you have someone who is protective of you (father, brother, etc.)? Mom and Sara above anyone else. Where was the last place you went, that you hadn’t been to before? Uhhhhh good question. I don't exactly go to new places often. Do you have any bad habits you aren’t working on changing? If so, do you ever think you’ll try to break them? I don't believe so off the top of my head? Then again I think everyone has little bad habits they don't try to improve upon, but I can't think of anything serious. When was the last time someone surprised you with their reaction or behaviors? I'm sure something with Mom, but idk what. Are you good at committing to things like Nanowrimo or Inktober? Nope. What is your preferred method of expressing yourself? Writing. Or drawing if I'm in the mood. Have you ever reached out to a crisis center for mental health support? If so, how was the experience? I tried to reach the suicide hotline via their online one-on-one chatroom because I was too afraid to actually call, but I ended up waiting I think 45 minutes before the OD happened. When was the last time you did something you were afraid to do, and how was the outcome? I drove at night and ordered food at a drive-thru myself. It went well. What is one positive thing you believe about yourself? I have a strong sense of right and wrong. What is something you have been through that has made you stronger? Depression as a whole. Other than money, what is something you wish you had more of in your life? Social life, success, and motivation to name a few. Is there anything that you tend to ignore for the sake of your sanity? Sure. Mental health stuff flares up sometimes if I think about some things too deeply. What was the last thing you argued or debated about? Did you eventually agree, or did you have to agree to disagree? Getting rid of Bentley, and neither, really. Mom knows we shouldn't have him for a world of reasons, yet she refuses to try to find a far more suitable home for him or at least talk to Nicole about it (he's her dog, but she doesn't live here), who's never even paid him almost any attention. I could rant about this for hours. What is something you wish was different about your family? THAT WE WERE CLOSER. What is your main struggle or focus in life right now? Getting out of the house/becoming more of a functioning adult. Are you more dramatic or stoic? I'm neither extreme, really, but I'd say I'm much further from stoic. Are you on medication for anything? If so, do you feel like it helps? Have you ever been afraid to take medication or had a particularly bad experience with it? A lot, but the only ones I feel don't work are the ones for my tremors and knees. I was on one med for a while that I was scared to take because it made me vomit (safe to say I wasn't on it long), and even my life-saver med made me sick at first, but I took prescription nausea pills to ride that out as my body adjusted. Do you prefer having long or short nails? Short, but not too short. When was the last time you had an argument with one of your parents? Idr. Do you tend to eat the same few things all the time or do you vary your intake? Would you consider yourself to be a picky eater? Are there any commonly enjoyed foods that you don’t like? I'm picky and definitely have a limited palate. Some foods I can think of for the last question include fried chicken, BBQ, watermelon, tacos, all cheeses but American, aaaand I'm blanking again in an area I should have a book about. Do you have good body image? Do you feel more confident about your body or your personality? What is one thing about yourself about which you do feel particularly confident? Ha, as if, so personality. I like how open-minded I am. How likely are you to compliment other people? How do you react or respond when you receive a compliment? What are your favorite types to receive? It depends on the person, the atmosphere, and my anxiety level. I sometimes fear complimenting people because I don't want someone to be like "um why is she talking to me?"/"is she flirting with me?"/"why did she notice that?", etc. I become so giddy (at the very least internally) when people compliment me because of how my self-esteem is, and I really appreciate them. The compliments that mean most to me are regarding my photography. With how badly I want to be a successful photographer, people seeming to genuinely like what I do has actually made me smile like an idiot and giggle publicly. It just means a lot to me. Describe the last thing you reblogged? How many posts do you tend to reblog during a day? A clip of Mark having a fit over a dog in RDR2. How much I reblog varies greatly; depends on how much I get on Tumblr that day, what I feel like sharing at that moment, what I queue... Have you ever lost your cool at work or somewhere else important? What happened as a result? No. Do you listen to your friends’ advice when they give it to you? Depends. If it's Sara, I usually do. What’s the last kind of soup you ate? Vegetable. Have you ever thought about getting your nose pierced? It is pierced. The most memorable time that you skipped school, what did you do? I don't recall. Did you ever have a favorite teacher in high school? What made them your favorite? Coach Collie. He was very friendly, wise, his sense of humor was great, he cared deeply for his students, was super chill, shared life advice all the time, etc. etc. Can you think of a time when you were really obviously judged by your appearance? What happened? Not that I recall. What’s something your mother told you growing up that you actually listened to? Mind your manners. What are three emotions you experience regularly? Stress, content, but also discontent. What is your favorite Halloween candy? Reese's. Is there anyone who refuses to communicate with you? *shrugs* What was the last lengthy packet you filled out? Something for vocational rehab. Is there something you still can’t do even though you’re an adult or might be expected to do this thing? I don't have a job or drive. When was the last time you congratulated someone? Were you happy for them, indifferent, jealous? When I found out one of my closest high school friends is pregnant. I was obviously happy for her. What would you say is your STRONGEST emotion? Maybe not the most frequent, but the most intense? And what emotion do you feel most weakly, even if you might feel it more often? Anger; envy (but it's not often). Have you ever gone somewhere in your pajamas? What makes this acceptable or unacceptable to you? Plenty times, but it depends on my level of shits given and the location. Honestly wish pjs were more acceptable in public places cuz like why not, you've got clothes on, just don't go around where everyone can totally see your dick, ass, or tits. Other than the usual things like IDs, etc, what do you always carry with you when you go out? My phone. What type of photography do you enjoy looking at? Do you take any photos yourself, and if so, what types of things do you prefer to photograph? LOTS!!!! I particularly love fantasy-styled portraiture or macabre work, and omg give me soft lighting. I'm a sucker for emotive or conceptual portraits and the like. I like to photograph an array of things, but my faves are nature and animals. Have you ever gone out for the Black Friday shopping rush? Did you enjoy it, or not so much? Or, what’s the busiest shopping day you’ve ever experienced? Nope. Busiest shopping day I indirectly experienced was when I worked at GameStop during the holiday season... nope. It's a small store and it was flooded. I hated it. Idk about one where I/my family was the shopper. Do you enjoy reading diaries or stories you wrote from when you were younger, or does it embarrass you? If you’ve kept them, was there a particular reason for hanging on to them so long? No. No. No. NO. I can't stomach going any further back than '15 at the RP forum because fucking cringe. All old stuff like physical journals and such, they're long gone because I never want to see them again lmao. What would you say was your first true hobby? What about your most recently developed one? Hmmm, probably video games were the first things I was *really* deep into. Recently developed... good question. Is there one thing that throws off your mood more than others, whether it be lack of sleep, lack of food, heat/cold, etc? I'M FUCKING /CRANKY/ IF I'M HOT. Serious lack of sleep makes me moodier. What is one common area of life in which you feel you have little to no experience (college, children, marriage, etc)? Work and independence. What kinds of things are you likely to complain about? HEAT. If it's hot to me, you're gonna know. I'll complain if my stomach especially hurts, sometimes with other pain. Do you like to put any extra effort into your food in terms of presentation, or do you prefer to just put it on a plate and eat it as it is, no frills? I don't cook, so. But I'd definitely be the latter. When was the last time you were mean or rude to someone else? How about the last time someone acted that way toward you? I hung up on this insurance agency or whatever they are that call me every other goddamn day. I dunno about the second question. What kinds of things are most likely to make you lose your temper? Have you ever done something regrettable or embarrassing while angry? I fucking dare you to ridicule the mentally ill in front of me. Goddamn dare you. For the second part, not to my recollection. Do you have a large dog? No, both our dogs are medium-sized. If not, are you afraid of them? Not at all. Do your parents know that/if you smoke? I don't. What is the reason you last received money? Mom borrowed some from me so she was paying me back. Is anyone in your family sick? Not to my knowledge. Are you very upfront about things or do you "beat around the bush"? The latter, typically. Do you ever write poetry just to get your feelings out? Not really anymore. Middle and high school? I was all about it. I wrote only one poem this year. How many bones have you broken? None. Whose house did you visit last? My sister Ashley's. Have you ever bought a fragrance by a celeb because you liked who it was? No. Do you have a gazebo at your house? No. What’s your favorite brand of bottled water? Essentia.

#survey #quiz #questions #random

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its-love-u-asshole · 6 years

Text

Stars and Stitches [fic]

Pairings: Kuroo Tetsurou/Tsukishima Kei

Summary: Kei has never been crazy about going out on Valentine's Day, and he and his boyfriend know how dangerous it can be on top of that. Instead, he'd much rather stay in for his celebrations, and he's glad Tetsurou is now on the same page.

Rating: T

Warnings: mild swearing, some making out bc you know the drill

Note: Hello! I made it in time for Valentine’s Day lol. This is my gift for @momomirasaki124 for the @hqvalentineexchange <3 I tried to incorporate most of your prompts, so I really hope you enjoy ; ; Big thanks to @emeraldwaves for reading this over!

AO3

The sounds someone should hear in the morning are easy enough to guess...

The muffled sounds of traffic, a few birds chirping, and maybe some dulled footsteps from the sidewalk just outside. All of it together marks the beginning of a new, work filled day, which Kei would rather not think about.

Today is different at least.

What Kei hears is different too, and the sounds automatically make his mornings better than most people's. His alarm has become the distinct crack of Tetsurou's back as he stretches to get up.

It happens so often, Kei can now expect it, count on it. If a morning comes without the three little pops of Tetsurou's spine, then can it really be a new day? Not in his book.

He's happy they've reached the age where Tetsurou has stopped going on business trips so much. Mornings are way less dread filled these days.

"Ah fuckin shit," Tetsurou curses, one of the only few times Kei gets to hear him curse, because the other is far too much of a goody goody for that. Kei cherishes it.

It's a constant now. Like Kei spilling sauce on his shirt at dinner, or Tetsurou stubbing his toe at the end of the bed. Routines are hard to break.

He snorts as Tetsurou touches his lower back out of shock, as if this doesn't happen every damn day.

And, like clockwork, Kei delivers his line: "Quit whining old man."

It's his favorite, because Tetsurou is far from old in his book, and looks about ten years younger than he is. It's unfair. But while Kei may look like an older man, Tetsurou is the one who's beginning to complain like one.

"I don't know if we should order that, it looks sort of spicy doesn't it?"

"Kei, that's way past our bedtime."

"Can you believe the neighbors let their yard look like that?"

And fuck it, Kei laughs harder, especially when Tetsurou finally looks at him.

Tetsurou turns to him, eyes beady from sleep, his brain still working out how to distinguish shapes instead of blobs. Not like he needs much cognitive power to deal with his little shit of a husband, which he'll probably realize in .2 seconds. The raven's hair is as much a mess as it ever was, except now some of the hairs are more of a dull gray than a sleek black. Doesn't really bug Kei much. He still pulls on it, whether they're having sex or when Tetsurou clogs up the DVR with sci-fi movies.

Tetsurou complains about how he's probably going to go bald at sixty because of Kei. Kei pulls harder.

Wigs are a thing.

They have their little staring contest for another few seconds before Kei regrets his decisions. In response to his smug little grin, Tetsurou unleashes a new tactic, one Kei simply cannot overcome.

Tetsurou farts.

Yup like a twelve-year old.

It's loud too, and Kei's not about to stick around for the smell. They'd had a big dinner the night before.

What a fool he'd been.

Tetsurou just lets one rip right into their newly washed bedspread and Kei may not be a big athlete anymore, but the speed at which he jumps out of bed is unrivaled. His knees buckle because Kei never stopped being a baby giraffe in some sense, and he topples over, his brain not awake enough to communicate to his legs that uh hey, you guys can walk you know?

"I want a divorce," Kei mutters, staying on the floor because why not? It's fun down here.

Tetsurou gasps, leaning over the bed cautiously so that his face is peeking down at Kei. The image is almost cute enough for Kei to forgive him. Almost. "On Valentine's Day? That's a bit cruel isn't it babe?"

Kei throws a pillow at him, and since they're not above this kind of retributive justice, a war ensues. Kei always insists on having a shitload of pillows on their bed, though half of them end up on the floor and Tetsurou ends up only using two, but it's for the aesthetic™ okay?

Also, Kei likes having a good supply of weaponry. Some of these are back support pillows. They can kill, and he knows it.

The fun ends when Tetsurou stubs his toe on the edge of the bed again, and Kei doesn't care about counting it as a cease fire. He fuckin' won, bitch.

Tetsurou ends up running ten minutes behind because Kei has to break out the first-aid kit and make sure he didn't break something, and then he's scrambling to get ready, avoiding the bed at all costs.

Meanwhile, Kei plops himself down on their couch and listens to Tetsurou drop nearly every bottle in their bathroom. He clicks on the television, sipping his coffee leisurely and humming because Tetsurou finally remembered to buy his preferred brand from the store.

He hears Tetsurou curse from the kitchen this time, and yeah, that...that was a mug he'd just heard.

Yeah, working from home is a blessing. He'd clean the shards up later.

Kei has more pressing issues at the moment, like the fact Tetsurou fucking clogged up the DVR again.

Defiantly, Kei erases one, but just one. If something seems amiss, then Tetsurou will come for his cooking shows and he cannot miss who goes home this week. They're three episodes away from the finale, it's a crucial time.

He changes the channel to some stereotypical romance flick just to provide background noise, and remembers what Tetsurou had said earlier.

Valentine's Day.

It's not like Kei had forgotten, how could he? It's like the holiday threw up on anything within an infinite mile radius. Pink hearts, red streamers, cute cards and flower bouquets littered every grocery store he passed. There were ads on T.V. too, not to mention the influx of romance films and the public displays of affection he'd been forced to witness on the street ever since February 1st.

Yeah, so it's Valentine's Day. What a shock.

Kei hardly hates the holiday though, and not just for the candy clearance sale the day after.

A few seconds later, Kei is broken from his thoughts by a wet, sloppy kiss hitting his cheek, and he's not proud of it, but he yelps. Tetsurou is smirking at him, and screw it, Kei's revenge meter is all out of juice for now. He leans forward, catching Tetsurou's lips greedily.

He can feel the wetness on his cheek still, and he wipes it off, making Tetsurou laugh against his mouth. Asshole.

But Kei's smiling like an idiot.

Kei's breath still stinks too, he's almost positive, so that's payback enough.

Not like it ever matters.

Soon enough Tetsurou is wetting Kei's dry lips with his tongue, and the innocent kiss develops the potential to get too steamy too fast.

The last thing they need is Tetsurou's office knowing his husband gave him a boner first thing in the morning.

Or maybe they do.

Fuck 'em.

Kei clumsily sets his coffee down on the table, knowing a few drops sloshed out onto the sides but not really caring about the stickiness as he moves into Tetsurou's lap. Large, rough hands take their reserved place on his hips, rubbing circles in the exposed skin lazily. Kei moans, letting his tongue tangle with his husband's, and just because he can't help it, he tugs on his black strands, messaging Tetsurou's scalp.

From the way Tetsurou groans at the treatment, they know it's too much for a goodbye kiss. At least on a work day.

"Save it for tonight stardust," Tetsurou practically purrs, and Kei's so used to the nickname by now he overlooks it altogether. He does plan to save it for tonight actually.

"Don't be too tired when you get home then," Kei whispers, delivering one last peck to Tetsurou's lips before he climbs off of him. Tetsurou is at least twenty minutes late now.

"How dare you, since when do I get tired?" Tetsurou says, getting up to stretch lazily. It's not really a question they have to answer, not when they'd recently started knocking out before eleven. Their college selves would be ashamed.

Kei leans back, admiring shamelessly as Tetsurou fixes his tie. He's allowed okay? Fifteen years gives him permission to do mostly anything. Tetsurou's not as cut and carved as he used to be, but he's still the envy of all their neighbors, not to mention eye candy for plenty of them.

Tetsurou's the ultimate image of someone who aged well and looked happy doing so, walking out of the house in his slacks and button up like he didn't realize how admired he was. Kei's sure he does though, he just doesn't really care unless Kei's the one doing the admiring.

Yup, that's right. Kei married the neighborhood hottie, his mom would be so proud.

Tetsurou preens from the attention Kei gives him, leaning down lift Kei's chin and give it an affectionate squeeze. "Take out for dinner?"

Kei snorts. Duh. "It's Valentine's Day, isn't it?"

Tetsurou grins, and already, Kei can't wait for him to come home.

Their Valentine's Day traditions have changed throughout the years, but the holiday refuses to let go of at least some of its spark. When they were in college, they'd actually gone out, fighting for reservations at nice restaurants, going to new movies, or sometimes even doing the stupidest things imaginable...

Now though, Kei's patience for the crowds and the stress was even more thin, and his expectations for a romantic night out were simpler, more private.

Basically, Valentine's Day had become one of the few nights of the year where they elected to do nothing. Nothing.

No cleaning, no cooking, no worrying about meeting up with friends or scheduling home improvements, just...nothing. They ordered food, the most unhealthy sort Kei could think of, and spent the hours together, watching shitty movies and reminiscing.

It's cheesy, he knows. But he doesn't mind that anymore either. It's so cheesy, and he loves it. He loves Tetsurou.

It's the perfect way to spend a night in his mind.

Over the years, Valentine's Day fills him less with butterflies, and more of a calm nostalgia. A comfort, a warmth.

Kind of like Tetsurou himself. Kei smiles; he knows the feeling is mutual.

That's one thing he does appreciate about getting older. The confidence in his partner, the content which comes with the smallest things. The need to pretend or hide is long gone, chipped away at throughout the years until it ceased to exist.

When he was younger, he'd always wondered if he'd ever get to point like this, how it all would feel...

He guesses this is what it's like. He finally knows the answer, grinning as he watches Tetsurou trip over his own feet as he races out the door to work.

This is fifty.

When they're twenty-four, they're not as enlightened.

"Kuroo, please stop," Kei pleads, and yes, he really does plead. As above freaking out as he usually is, this is ridiculous. His voice is a high-pitched whisper, and his shoulders are tense, looking every which way in search of a possible security guard or serial killer (anything could happen alright?) coming for them.

"Relax babe, we can do this no problem," Tetsurou shrugs him off, tying his old sports jacket around his waist and eyeing the chain link fence in front of them. At first glance, it doesn't look so tall, but Kei has his doubts.

In the distance, he can hear the crowd cheering as the opening act of a concert takes to the stage. He really does like this band...maybe--oh my god no!

Kei reaches forward as Tetsurou touches the fence, about to start his climb, grabbing his hands instead. This is a bad idea and they both know it. Tetsurou only blinks at him, torn between pleased and confused that they're touching, and Kei can't help it, he blushes despite his annoyance.

He keeps their hands locked together though.

"We're too old for this, you're not exactly eighteen anymore," Kei scolds, and he winces, the backpack he has on suddenly bothering him. They'd stuffed a good amount of beer in it earlier, hoping to have a romantic night at the concert.

Problem is, they're broke bitches, so actually buying tickets to said concert wasn't a possibility. Tetsurou had been so confident about finding a way in though, Kei had simply rolled with it.

How dumb of an idea could Tetsurou possibly conjure up?

That's what he'd thought. To this day, Kei doesn't know why he keeps testing fate.

Maybe it's because with Tetsurou, he doesn't need much convincing that things will work out. And really, they always have, just not always in the way he anticipates.

Tetsurou grins at him, kissing Kei's knuckles softly as he laughs. "Psh, you make it sound like I've got liver spots already, it's just a fence. We'll be over it no time..."

Tetsurou's voice climbs in pitch, playfully egging Kei on as he scoots closer, but Kei sees through it, and won't let the control slip so easily from his grasp.

Kei huffs, dodging Tetsurou's kiss to his lips. It takes more willpower than he'd like to admit. "Okay, what about this: I'm not eighteen anymore. Are you trying to kill me?"

He's not joking either. Kei wouldn't call himself a complete klutz, but he's not exactly Mr. Elegance. He can't even stand on one foot for too long, and his boyfriend wants him to hop a fucking fence?

If they get caught sneaking in with a crap ton of beer (assuming they make it over the fence without eating shit), they're dead, and Kei would rather not make that call to his parents to bail him out.

Tetsurou just laughs, the sound sudden and downright hideous, but Kei loves it anyways. "Stardust, you look as young and beautiful as the day I first saw you..."

"We're going to end up in the ER again," Kei deadpans, refusing to let the nickname get to him. It causes him to blush up to his ears, and even in the dark, he's sure Tetsurou can tell, but it's fine.

Compliments will get him nowhere.

Tetsurou slumps against Kei, a full body pout, and Kei can't help but laugh, pushing him in vain. Damn, Tetsurou is heavy.

"Hey stop--ah! Stop!" Kei pleads, his voice a whisper in between broken giggles. His legs are giving, and screw it, he just lets Tetsurou fall on top of him. Grass stains be damned, he is not losing this battle.

They end up wrestling for a bit, the grass soft and inviting, before Tetsurou pins him there, always better when it comes to contests of brute strength.

I'll get him back later. Kei never fails to.

Kei's laughter comes in short, fading bursts, his lungs fighting to catch up. Tetsurou's hands frame his face, and looking up, he can see the night sky is serving as the raven's own personal backdrop.

There's a lot of stars out, he notices, and for a moment, he wonders if it's really fair that Tetsurou gives Kei all the celestial nicknames. They seem far better suited to him, especially when those golden eyes are shining as bright as the stars above, focused solely on Kei.

Kei's own, personal galaxy, wrapped up in one person.

Ugh, listen to yourself. Shut up.

Tetsurou's rubbing off on him, and he's not a fan.

Rather than stew in his embarrassment, he meets Tetsurou's lips halfway, and the raven pauses just briefly, as if asking permission. It's almost a tease too, with how Tetsurou's breath tickles Kei's face from how close they are, the hesitation too considerate and too maddening all at once.

Kei grants the wish, and the kiss sends sparks through him, all the way down to his toes as he melts against his boyfriend.

It's short, because they're out in the open and Tetsurou knows how Kei is about their privacy, but that doesn't stop him from quickly rubbing their noses together before he finally pulls back.

Dork.

Tetsurou sighs, staring down at Kei fondly, and the blond thinks maybe now they can just skip all this and go home. After all, it's Valentines' Day, and the concert is probably on T.V. anyhow.

However, when has Tetsurou ever conceded so easily?

"Well, thanks for that, now I feel like I could climb two fences," Tetsurou says triumphantly, and Kei's smile instantly falls as his boyfriend smirks. "Maybe even a whole mountain."

"I'm leaving you." Kei gets up, but he doesn't go anywhere. He's all bark and no bite, sadly.

"Yes yes," Tetsurou says, because goddammit, he knows Kei's ass isn't going anywhere either, and turns back to eye the fence. "Now, back to business."

"Why are you like this?"

"I just like proving you wrong baby," Tetsurou says, putting one of his feet into an opening in the fence. Oh my god you're serious aren't you? Fucking...

"I highly doubt I'll be proved wrong," Kei says, already taking his phone out in case he needs to call someone. That, and part of him really does worry about his boyfriend's safety, and he'd rather not actively watch the climb. On the off chance Tetsurou actually gets over the fence, Kei notes, the raven will never let him forget it, so it's a losing situation all around for him.

Tetsurou turns to him, his hands and feet now locked into his starting position, and gives him one last dazzling grin. "Watch and learn."

And oh, Kei learns.

He learns that damn, he should be a motherfucking psychic with how good he predicted this shit.

They end up in the ER about half an hour later, but Kei's not really as concerned as he'd feared. In fact, he's starting to get bored. He knows it's bad, but the 'hehe I was right' potential behind this whole night has him giddy, and he can only hope he and Tetsurou stay together for the rest of their lives, just so he always has a chance to bring it up.

They hadn't gotten caught by anyone, but Tetsurou had lost his footing on the fence halfway to the top, and ended up with a deep gash on his thigh. After the initial freakout of driving them to the hospital and signing Tetsurou in, only to find the injury was an easy fix, he calmed down.

Three hours of waiting room scrabble and twelve stitches later, Tetsurou is signing out at the front desk about ten feet from him. Kei sits in the overly stiff waiting room chairs, ready to get up and help his boyfriend limp to the car. No excessive activity for a week and a half. Those are the doctor's orders, and Kei plans to enforce them, strictly.

This night has been a stressful one, but at least it was winding down.

Now, Kei only wants to go home and relax, maybe curl up with Tetsurou and watch the missed concert on pay-per-view and nurse his boyfriend's hurt ego.

The night is still young.

Plus, he can see the slight guilt in Tetsurou's eyes, the damn romantic. As if this could possibly ruin Valentine's Day. Hell, this is the best Valentine's Day Kei has had so far.

And the holiday would only get better, if the both of them were involved, no matter how stupid the shenanigans.

Tetsurou smiles sheepishly at him as he turns from the desk, and Kei shakes his head fondly, standing to allow Tetsurou to use him as his own personal crutch.

As heavy as Tetsurou is, Kei doesn't mind the weight.

Tetsurou groans a little from the pain as they walk through the parking lot, and when there's no one in sight, Kei allows himself to reach up and kiss the corner of Tetsurou's mouth.

"You know, maybe next year, we should stay home and order takeout," Kei suggests, his smile smug, and Tetsurou kisses it right off.

The raven sighs, but looks about as happy as Kei feels, despite the stitches in his leg. "You know what stardust, you might just be onto something."

Kei smiles at the memory, sipping wine from the mug Tetsurou bought him for his 50th birthday (because he's classy like that, and who needs wine glasses?).

He has his feet in Tetsurou's lap, and he's eating directly from the box of fried rice they ordered, because Tetsurou prefers pan fried noodles anyways, so they just order their own sides.

Kei is laughing so hard he fears he might choke, and with a pout, Tetsurou throws a spring roll at him.

"Hey! If you get crumbs on the couch, you're cleaning it," Kei protests, eating the spring roll because fuck no you're not getting it back now.

"You tell this story every year," Tetsurou groans, but he's laughing just as hard. "When will you give it a rest?"

"When it stops being funny, which will be never," Kei says with a shrug, because it is the most obvious thing in the world at this point. He likes to call that ER episode the most memorable Valentine's Day they've ever had, but he'd rather not have a repeat.

No, he'd been right all those years ago.

Sitting here in pajamas and fighting over what movie to watch, eating foods that'll go straight to his thighs...

This is his kind of Valentine's Day.

Doesn't mean he can't remember their younger ones fondly though, as stupid as they were.

And judging from the way Tetsurou is looking at him, like their back lying in the grass all over again, Kei knows he feels exactly the same.

"Guess I'll have to endure then," the raven says, pulling Kei into his arms, and he doesn't sound the least bit upset about it. "Happy Valentine's Day."

And yeah, Kei thinks, it most definitely is.

#kurotsuki #hqvalentineexchange #adri writing #haikyuu!!

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hotniatheron · 7 years

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book questions

tagged by: @resistanceposterboy, probably trying to see if my stupid ass has finished anything she’s rec’d

Which book has been on your shelves the longest? I’m in the house I grew up in, so it’s definitely The Little White Horse.

What is your current read, your last read and the book you’ll read next? Current read is The Book of Longing by Leonard Cohen, last read was The Bonesetter’s Daughter by Amy Tan, and I guess I should finish Annihilation

Which book does everyone like and you hated? Emma can burn in hell, that boring ass book

Which book do you keep telling yourself you’ll read, but you probably won’t? I’m READY to just read the summary of the raven boys so I can get to dream thieves

Which books are you saving for “retirement?” I guess when i’m old and senile I can re-read Ari and Dante for the first time again and cry

Last page: read it first or wait till the end? it depends, usually not

Acknowledgements: waste of ink and paper or interesting aside? sometimes they’re wack and that’s why I read them

Which book character would you switch places with? Princess Addie from the two princesses of bamarre, i wanna be a princess and marry a hot sorcerer

Do you have a book that reminds you of something specific in your life (a person, a place, a time)? Kartography will always remind me of college

Name a book you acquired in some interesting way. my uncle’s girlfriend’s mother adores me for whatever reason and she buys me true crime novels every christmas and she knows i thought about being in the FBI at one point, so she tries to find the grisliest murder scenes

Have you ever given away a book for a special reason to a special person? no, and i don’t really give books unless people ask for them. books are a personal thing to me.

Which book has been with you to the most places? lmao my trashy harlequins I read on the plane

Any “required reading” you hated in high school that wasn’t so bad ten years later? I hated chronicle of a death foretold bc my teacher absolutely Did Not Get It, but it’s one of my favorites now

What is the strangest item you’ve ever found in a book? my copy of gone girl is a hand me down and every time the word fuck appears it’s underlined :/

Used or brand new? as long as i can read it, it doesn’t matter

Stephen King: Literary genius or opiate of the masses? that man’s consciousness has a direct link to hell and i want nothing to do with his books

Have you ever seen a movie you liked better than the book? believe it or not, the hobbit movies were less boring than the book

Conversely, which book should NEVER have been introduced to celluloid? i’ll never forgive them for Eragon, not until the day I die know that!!!!

Have you ever read a book that’s made you hungry, cookbooks being excluded from this question? cybele’s secret. it’s the sequel to wildwood dancing and you can /smell/ the marketplace described in it

Who is the person whose book advice you’ll always take? my best friend is always reading interesting things

cristina already tagged almost everybody but @chutzpahhooplah do it!!!!

#tag meme #books

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tvshowsyespls · 5 years

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It’s not just their interaction that matters, it’s seeing their actions whilst fully aware of their pasts to identify growth/change and how others can see their love even when they are not physically together: it’s in how Josie says ‘my father is a fool, one look at you and he should’ve known how this would end’, it’s in how Bellamy seems to ‘care about her more’ than everyone else he cares about (according to J, who is apparently great at reading people est. ep7). It’s how Russell says to Josie ‘have you become so callous to the feelings of others that you don’t remember what it’s like to lose someone you love?’ when canonically she has only expressed loss with Gabriel. She talks about how G has been trying to kill her for 70 years and says ‘relationships, yknow?’ As if B was gonna be like ‘lol tru’, then she takes a walk down memory lane, saying ‘besties’ before claiming how BC is ‘weird’. You’re right Josie, louder!

It’s weird because in s1, the script says Bellamy was thrown by the intimacy then said that for a moment Clarke wanted to run away with him as she held his face in her hands? platonically?What even?? I know, so glad we got this 131 year old slow burn instead. It’s weird because they flirted and C invited B to get a drink with her but B turned her down, choosing to be the responsible boy that will have his fun when the grounders come... It’s weird because there was a Lexa-Clarke-Bellamy love triangle according to Alycia (Do I even need to go on?)

It’s weird because Clarke jumped on Niylah after putting her hand on top of hers that were on her shoulders, it’s her mating ritual for when she wants to get laid. Observe: she pulled the same shit on Bellamy in the list scene only for him to tell her ‘get some sleep’ (LOL awks - who told her to platonically smush her face on top of their hands that rested on her shoulder for 10+ seconds - maybe B was thrown by the intimacy again bc he was like ‘gtg’ lol) and she ended up in Niylah’s bed the next morning.

It’s weird because Clarke was willing to sacrifice her mother in s3 (Abby was literally hanging when B came in right on time) but gave into Roan’s blackmail with B and Kane in s4 - WELL of course because Kane is her stepdad!!! but...she was willing to let her mum die and that’s exactly what she reminds Roan and the viewers before it becomes canon that Bellamy is THAT pal ™ that is more important than your mother + 50 skykru lives that were dropped from the list just like that even though the whole season Clarke had been all for her people first. Remember when he was about to open the bunker and Clarke fully thought she was saving the human race by locking skykru in but let B open it anyway, crying as she couldn’t even shoot him in the leg or something? Talk about WEAK! Bellamy somehow convinced her to let everyone in?👀 Clexa coalition parallels anyone? No? Ok.

Remember how she looked as she volunteers to go with B to get Raven even tho 5 secs ago, she was ok leaving her and every other friend and human out to die? (Sidenote: ‘I never meant to hurt you’ like CLARKE PLS, you were about let around 600 people die and ur talking about Bellamy? Check urself, he’s pissed too - until he isn’t because Clarke says ‘nothing is okay, no matter what I choose, somebody always dies’ which makes B make light of it (bc he always understands) with ‘not shooting me was the right choice’ leading to it being canon that BC staring at each other causes them to run over someone and crash their very necessary life-saving vehicle... Who tf wrote this???) Throwback to TondC (‘I did it to save Bellamy’ followed ‘what if I sent him in there to die’ which followed ‘you should go, I was being weak’ - the LENgths she was willing to go to progressed with her worry for him that it was truly tragic for the grounder villagers (but tbf Lexa did convince her so Heda is right, they totally couldn’t have created a fire diversion as Clarke suggested) and that worry turned into literal platonic love as, for a moment, it was tragic for everyone outside the bunker too that second times C had to make a similar choice. The narrative really made Clarke say and do those things in that order huh? Wow) Remember how she was ready to let O die and keep B in the bunker, have him hate her to parallel kabby that season? HOW is B still alive? He was all like ‘I’m not gonna be in the bunker’ and Clarke’s like ‘you WILL’ before he even finishes his sentence lol. He did say ‘people die when you’re in charge’ and yet... it’s almost like idk, Clarke never wants to lose him ever.

Platonically of course because their attraction to each other has disappeared since s1... because you see that person and you’re like ‘lol nvm, ur not as hot as I remember 6 years ago when we were giving each other the looks™’ right? So you just watch them make out with their SO twice in canon to drive that point home. Especially when it’s your bff that you talked to everyday for 2199 days according to Flame!Madi who strutted right up to Bellamy, demanded he forgive C (lexa, is that you fighting in Clarke’s corner? 😭) before telling him something she ‘SHOULDN’t’ tell him?? Sorry Clarke, was this a private thing that Madi was privy to that she felt she shouldn’t expose or did you tell her not to mention it?? Madi said ‘she called YOU’ lol, like when is Madi gonna expose Clarke’s radio calls to Raven pls, I need the platonic princess mechanic relationship instantly restored like that! The radio call elixir: makes you soft for you bff and invite her to decide the fate of the human race as you always do (we genuinely love a platonic team!) despite the fact she left you to die 2 days ago for endangering her kid in the name of stopping the war, which she herself decided to later do after Lexa, her romantic soulmate, tells her not to make the same mistake she did because it would be her biggest regret. Lexa tells C don’t abandon your platonic pal™, love is not weakness and life should be about more than just surviving. Did Lexa say Bellarke rights, Clarke be happy and let yourself love him? No, Lexa wants BC to live like her and Clarke did in her bed? No, no, Lexa said ‘live like Clexa, but don’t have sex’? Yup that’s what happened. And C has the audacity to say ‘save him’ after giving her child permission to walk into a war zone and endanger her life like.. I prayed Lexa protects Madi yes pls.

Either way, let your bff know you love him! Say ‘bro, you kept me sane and I love you for that’- it’s easy gsjsjah why you making it so hard, girl?? Hug and move on, let’s go! There was a perfect opportunity around that fire where you instead wasted time saying ‘all of me for all of us’ to just B? (All of u is for all two of you huh? Jk jk lol this is the most platonic thing in s5, I digress) before giving him ur bread lmao y so dramatic, we love extra af jokester pals (I do really like the platonic bad jokes fr tho 😂👌🏾)

(All is fun and games until the joy of reuniting with Madi is gone the second she sees becho. Like SMILE, Clarke, your soulmate pal ™ found his romantic soulmate like you found yours, remember?)

EVERY DAY for 2199 days huh?: It’s canon that Clarke Griffin after getting radiation roasted, decided to pick up her radio from the floor with her blistered hand that first day to try to call Bellamy, wanting to find out asap if he were alive... He didn’t respond and C had two choices they were alive or they were dead? Either way she said fuck it, Imma hope he’s alive and imma call Bellamy every day like the pal™ that I am, not even thinking like this: ‘imma talk to lexa bc she’s the love of my life and it’s literally just been 2-3 months since she got put in the flame and the flame is on Earth with me so I’m at peace.’ Like why wasn’t that canon instead?? Instead we got ‘I still have hope’ @ B 2199 days later.

The platonicness of Madi looking at Bellamy only and going ‘Clarke knew you would come’ and grabbing him by the hand like she’s his BFF? (that’s Clarke’s BFF Madi, get your own!) sorry but Madi has never met him in her life but she’s like ‘Clarke’s in trouble’ and suddenly B has been kidnapped by a kid. The rest of spacekru left alone in the forest to figure out their own shit bc B said ‘gtg save my bestie brb’ - NOT EVEN, he straight up left them stranded LMAO. (S6 in a nutshell tbh) Then Clarke in s6 has the audacity to look caught ™ when B casually brings radio calls up as friends would, he says it’s a lil pathetic and Clarke becomes the literal sun and B becomes the moon, shining all the laughs right back at her. Meanwhile, Clarke’s large ass pupils are drinking in all this HAPPINESS - not to reach but was that an example of life being more than just surviving? We actually have time for jokes and banter now? Fck Yeah ✨✨

What’s funny is the fact that Jordan knew about the head and the heart convo from s4 because B must’ve told Monty/Harper somewhere between being on the ring and before going into cryo. Since s5 was canon of what happened between returning to earth and going into cryo, logic leads me to believe Bellamy talked to marper about the head and the heart on the ring. It’s funny how Bellamy still got emotional when she’s brought up 6 years after ‘her death’ (Clexa parallels anyone?) and funny how determined he is to honour Clarke’s last words (be the head so their friends survive) only to say ‘I don’t need you anymore’ under psychosis, is that a trauma I see? 👀 soz, did I miss the season Bellamy said he needed Clarke? Only Clarke says the word need (‘I need you’, ‘we need each other, Bellamy’) unless that’s what he meant when he said ‘you got it backwards’ (@ Jaha saying you keep her centered)or when he whispered ‘I’ve got you for that’ or when he shouted ‘I CAN’T lose Clarke... we can’t lose her’. Either way, I love platonic soulmates that need each other.

(Randomly just remembered when B had that nice pal talk with Wells about how Clarke never sees him when Finn’s around, lolll what?? Weirdo. BC parallels with Wells and Clarke? Yes pls)

Tell your bff you love them challenge ft. Clarke who said ‘u look fine today, sad boy so I’mma look you over from the tips of ur toes to the top of ur head platonically then tell you you’re special and that your sis will come around’ and B who canonically says ‘Clarke, if I don’t see you again-‘ only for Clarke to be like ‘you WILL’ before B even finished his sentence - it’s rude to interrupt your friends when they’re talking Clarke! He was only gonna say ‘may we meet again’ anyway bc for some reason y’all bffs don’t canonically say ‘I love you [bro]’ and maybe B knows it’s because you hate I love yous and don’t say it unless you think it’s goodbye forever.

It’s in how Clarke puts Bellamy at the same level as Madi and cannot face Bellamy in her mind space, despite him being alive, because she thinks that he thinks she’s a monster - she cannot see her platonic pal’s love, I love that trope. It’s in how Clarke says ‘I’m not leaving you’ because her biggest regret was leaving B in the pits (but also the time she left him after MW) and it’s in how Bellamy says ‘I won’t let you die’ after letting her die twice now, I call that growth. So J mocks their weird relationship and B is like ‘lols I know’. He has a girlfriend who lied to him about her past during the 6 uninterrupted years they spent on the ring and he starts an argument with her seemingly out of nowhere (after watching Clarke dance with the doctor) and lying that at the last party he was at, he couldn’t protect his sister when we damn well know that the last party he was at was Jasper’s, does echo not know about Jasper? Did no one (Bellamy) tell her? He didn’t have to say ‘the last party I was at’ he could’ve easily said ‘at the party on Ark’. The way he even said this sounded like he was telling Echo for the first time what happened to his sister... they didn’t talk about the reason he ended up on the ground whilst on the ring huh? When Echo says something reasonable, he snaps that this is about feelings and that he never knows how she feels about anything... sounds like he’s projecting but I’m not going to tell you how to interpret it. Then when Echo opens up about her past, B says ‘you told me you didn’t remember your parents’. I love watching becho development because it’s clear how becho are not as compatible as we would’ve thought. (My headcanon up until s6 for them was that they connected over their similar childhoods and responsibility to their people and share the burden of the sins they’ve committed to live and grow together whilst finding peace in each other)

(This is just a snippet of how I see BC and I have no reason to be biased towards it. In fact, during s2-3 I actively made myself ship Clexa more than I shipped BC because I wanted that win for lgbt rep - yes, my mind is that extra that even without social media influence on my binge viewing experience, I felt that Clexa deserved E V E R Y T H I N G so believe me when I say I didn’t want this blarke life 🙃)

Everyone is agreed that they have an awesome non-sexual soulmate love? Yes? I admit, they COULD be platonic, depending on your definition of sexuality. Platonic is defined as ‘love or friendship that is affectionate/intimate but not sexual’.

If Clarke died next ep, bellarke will be remembered as platonic by those that believe sexual acts are what make a relationship romantic and remembered as romantic by those that infer sexual chemistry/feelings/thoughts in certain bellarke scenes.

Imo, it’s not logical to believe sexuality is only physical: it goes against basic common sense in that people would only be considered straight/gay/bi etc. at the point of their first sexual encounter and dating relationships would be platonic until the first sexual act within it.

Personally, I think romantic relationships arise with intention: the shared understanding of what you are offering each other (sexual acts included) and how you prioritise your person over all other humans.

It’s not crude to appreciate the intricacy of physical attraction or understand the implications of it driving the need to be as intimate as possible with someone. And the problem with bellarke is that there IS sexual chemistry and attraction. It’s established in season 1 and it’s made headlines - not that you should care- but both types of people (that would now consider bellarke platonic and those that wouldn’t) probably picked up on it because this aspect of their relationship was planned and written into the story. Longing and pining to just BE with someone is the pinnacle of romance and not only is it canon that bellarke look at each other with humongous pupils, it is also canon (through writing, direction and music) that bellarke prioritise each other, are extremely vulnerable to each other, always want to be ‘together’ do things ‘together’ no matter what. So I’m failing to understand why people don’t want to look at all the evidence and draw the clear conclusion: Bellarke tick every box for a romantic relationship except sexual acts and I think it’s a disservice to not recognise the reality of them as the epic love story that they are. Let’s not even mention the possibility that the reason they haven’t ticked that box is because they have given themselves over to their people in selfless duty or continued trauma from lost lovers.

I’m gonna conclude by saying I ship Clexa and Bellarke but with what’s going on in the story rn, bellarke are it for me. I’d say endgame but it could all change if there’s narrative to suggest otherwise. What I see happening by the end of the series is lexa being back (in what capacity idk) and either Clexa or Bellarke being party to the ‘I will love you forever but I will learn to love someone else so that we can chersish the relationship we have for what it is, not what it has been or what it could be, and be happy together forever’ while the other is canon endgame. Or maybe be by the series finale we’ll get endgame polygamy? - Now that’s edgy af! But those are best case scenarios lol.

Realistically, atleast one of BC are gonna die, Lexa will be brought back as Alycia but not into the real world (unless we get plot that finally exposes the mental space realm??? That sounds fucking dope tbh - they’ve been teasing alternate realities this whole damn show and what is more sci-fi than that? It would also incorporate the flame and Jason loves the flame and Clexa love the flame so??? Anyone wanna hire me as a writer?) and there’s endless possibilities really so I’m conflicted between hoping that Book 2 is less about tragedy/survival and more about happiness/life and knowing that hope for the 100 is offbrand and too much of a reach, with the evidence that we have but the writers could easily get us all there, man. I’m excited!

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