#bc I do and I cry every time

[otrtbs]

dating is so hard bc wdym neither of us knows how to drive like … if i’m a passenger seat princess and you’re a passenger seat princess then who’s driving the car ???????

#she’s like ‘u can drive to come pick me up 🥰’ #and 27281 curbs are injured and i pull up shaking and crying x #when i live in a walkable city with public transportation again then EVERYONE will be sorry !!!!!!!! #nat vs car and the car wins every time. #i once got almost crushed by an 18 wheeler on my to austin and it was 2933928% my fault #:( #i’m not like a super bad driver tho i just hate it immensely and never want to do it bc. well. it’s fucking scary.

[genderkoolaid]

okay something ive been curious about is how people feel about their self harm scars. because mine are really important to me and I honestly feel love for them, and i enjoy when they are visible.

also this includes people who have any kind of permenant mark from self harm. and tbh if you have only self harmed in a way that leaves temporary marks then feel free to answer this too, or if you used to have some but now they aren't visible

#also this is not bc i get a lot of compliments on them #lord knows almost every member of family has said Something about them & my mother made me cry the first time she saw them #but they are important to me and i feel comforted by them #they feel like something very personal & smth thats truly my own #i absolutely do not blame people for having any sort of reaction towards theirs #my cousin has been getting his covered by REALLY fucking sick tattoos n im very happy for him #im just curious bc i dont feel like ive ever seen someone talk about their relationship w their scars in a way that feels similar to mine #m. #self harm tw

[priceofreedom]

funny how everyone seemed to adore Zack until he started having more screentime...

#it's honestly very surprising. i see hate towards him almost every day since Remake came out and i wish i was kidding #and yeah yeah i know other characters get lots of hate too but the hate towards him has been so sudden and random??? #idk maybe he *was* hated before but i just didn't notice #but at the same time no. i'm 100% sure the hate increased considerably after he was shown to be alive in the Remake #i feel like some people are just weirdly concerned he is gonna overshadow the main characters which is stupid #this story is still about Cloud and the others #we're just gonna explore another reality (allegedly) with Zack it's not that deep bro #(rebirth spoilers) -> even in Zack's timeline Cloud AND Aerith are there #and who knows how many more #like i get shippers being petty because when are they not petty #but i've seen non-shippers/casual players saying they do not want to see more of him and being all bitter bc he's important #he's always been important you all just refuse to acknowledge it!!! #no matter how many times hamaguchi nomura nojima etc say he's super important ppl just keep denying it 💀 #as if y'all know more than the freaking devs i'm getting tired of this bs #my post #i'm glad the devs love him as much as we do. cry about it

[moeblob]

You know, when I kept getting asked "so you didn't ever have severe pains before now?" in the hospital and I kept replying "I have a high pain tolerance" I meant it. However, there is only so much pain my tiny 4'9" body can hold... (aka I am sweating and in agony bc I'm getting told to use LESS severe pain meds so I don't rely on them too much and it is AWFUL)

#moe talks a lot #i was shaking earlier and despite the fact i sound like im gonna cry #and the fact that my mom can pick out im about to cry from pain bc im trying to take less pain meds #LIKE MY MOM IS INSTRUCTING ME TO DO #shes like well why arent you taking any pain meds #BECAUSE THERE ARE TWO AVAILABLE OPTIONS AND ON A SIX HOUR TIMER #i cant take both at once or else what happens to me if i hurt before the six hours is up #i have to manage them in a way that allows me to benefit from both and being told im doing it wrong #after being told well its your fault it got so bad because you never complained about pain before #YEAH NO JOKE? REALLY? I NEVER DID? because everyone acts like im too young to feel that kinda pain #oh youre hurting? just wait until youre older #and its currently agony to breathe again but that i guess is also my fault bc im trying to use pain meds #holy moly i just want to not get dizzy standing up cause wow dang #sure would be nice if the multiple incisions in my stomach didnt THROB every time i sneezed or coughed or cleared my throat #but since i didnt use much pain meds before because i would be mocked for being too much of a baby its like #welp damn now i could really use some and im being called out for being too reliant #anyway time to sleep more because that means im not noticing my pain #im literally smaller than most children and so i do understand my body size makes people worried about the medication intake #but can i please just go a day without being asked how much im taking or when i last took it or if im gonna cry #anyway sorry for the excessive rant today never really had surgery or anything so this is brand spankin new suffering

[lunarharp]

"Found out" set in kind of a made-up chapter where the girls are in trouble, or something.

#witch hat tag #orufrey #i hate having a strong cinematic image in your mind for months..working hours on it..& at the end looking you have to be like “Sure. :/" #i'm especially unsatisfied with the beginning and the end and how i can't get eyebrows to work as i want #but i dont care any more... this is probably the comic that has given me the most trouble ever i just dont care #i barely even care whatsoever if anyone even sees this..Ugh..but at least i can move on to the next era now #i'm just annoyed i cant get out good enough my image of qifrey flinching bc he thinks oru will hit him but then he is not hit #i feel like sensei will do something along these lines. i want to see what she will do. #there are also other variations i have in my mind. i just want to know #i just don't want it to happen with qifrey on his deathbed or something. but it possibly will. I DONT EVEN KNOW. #i have another very cinematic image in my mind for something sort of along those lines which i will do soon. it never ends... #btw after this is probably my fics. yeah.... i think it has to be my fics. jasmine sort of goes along these lines #i need that space for dialogue. look - i'm a writer. this is HARD for me. so i am really glad i had the space and freedom of words #to process all the feelings. but i tried to get something out in a quick visual space too. <- me defending myself to myself at cai court #anyway going along the lines of 'Jasmine' - they talk this out and argue and cry and oru pushes the hat at him and tells him #why not just erase every memory i have of you then. That would be easier for us all wouldn't it? #they kiss and sob and kiss and lie outside in the flowers for many hours in that one. and then there's 'Deep End' where it turns out #way way way way more time and words is needed for this actually and that's upsetting for everyone. #the destruction of the hat is certainly another path to take. Can you make this work without that hat going up in flames? #something you have always had and have been clinging to will have to be destroyed. You have to lose something now. This is the crux qifrey #I CANT GET IT OUT IN ONE COMIC!!! I CANT DRAW IT OUT!!!! I NEEDED THOSE FICS!!!! PRAISE WORDS!!!! whatever im going to have dinner now

[minzbins]

HYUNGWON MONMUKGO EP.11

#mx7net #monstaxedits #kiwitracks #madstual #usersrin #ayatracks #marieblr #monsta x #mx #hyungwon #chae hyungwon #!melstuff #monmukgo #monmukgo ep.11 #have i ever told y'all i love hyungwon so much? bc i do love him so fucking much 😫🤕🤧 #also all these eps with kihyun and hyungwon are so hilarious i'm literally crying from laughing every damn time sdkhjfbsfxckjf

[flufflecat]

Got to stolen century in my relisten and started tearing up at work because of magnus carving the duck. Just me in the back room, crying over the dish sink for normal reasons.

#the adventure zone #taz balance #taz #it gets me every time #I was anticipating that scene all shift #and wanted to leave before I got to it bc I knew I would start crying and didn't want to cry at work ahfkahfkka #unfortunately I had to stay an hour and a half late bc yayyy labor day #I also started tearing up at merle with the church of fungston. for some reason. #merle has never really made me that emotional before but I guess now in my old age I'm more struck by his love of life #i understand you better now merle. as a twenty-something I really see the appeal in being able to love life despite the hardships #(this is a joke. I am almost 24 and do not think I'm old) #(I do find merles brand of optimism very good nowadays though. I also have a zest for life and a need to complain about things) #I managed to not cry at the lup and Barry duet though which I am quite proud of #probably bc I spent like half an hour watching lup animatics last night and got my tears out then #I'm having a normal time #normal as hell #most people probably cry over podcasts at their grocery store job #I think that's a standard experience #especially when those podcasts are from 7 years ago and you're still not over them #standard #fluffle talks

[gojooooo]

sukuna begging yuuji to take him back because he wants to feel his emotions again instead of his own emptiness and nothing but the closeness they once had is enough for him. and when yuuji does, because he feels incomplete as well without sukuna, he spawns into the domain again and walks around the familiar place, hesitantly calling out sukuna’s name to confirm he’s really there. “sukuna…?”

“…kozō” he hears in return, fondness in the tone, and when he looks up at where he remembers the throne to be he sees a face so similar to his staring down at him with a smile, a hand immediately reaching out to slick the pink hair back. after everything they went through there’s no reason to keep dancing around it – they belong to each other.

#cue yuuji starting to cry because his kuna is back #maybe he can keep the arms and mouths but i need yuujikuna back sorry T_T #they bask in the comfort for a while sukuna sitting on his throne with yuuji on his lap and when they hold hands yuuji obviously goes #“hm i almost forgot what having two pinkies was like” and sukuna sighs “stop being dramatic you have three more now” #sukuna kissing every scar on yuuji’s face and affectionately running his thumb on the ones under his eyes because they’re on there again <3 #would sukuna inherit yuuji’s scars i think the answer is no bc he didn’t have them before but i like to think that he can do whatever he #wants. bc people thought he used yuuji’s face just to spite him which is so diabolical of him hehe #or maybe at first he was forced to wear yuuji’s face and couldn’t restore his true self because he was only a few fingers #and if he comes back and yuuji welcomes his presence instead of resisting it/restraining him then he’s free to look as he pleases #i could talk about this all day it’s so fascinating to me #and the fact that gege changes sukuna’s tattoos mask etc all the time does nawt help but it’s fun #my post

[natsmagi]

does he know how much he means to me

#confession the main reason i dont draw sora much is bc every time i do i START CRYING #BC I LOVE HIM SO MUCH #whatever #sora harukawa #enstars #ensemble stars #my art

[ganondoodle]

a wild assortement of comic wip screenshots and a random doodle that i posted to twitter but not here

(this doodle here is of Raal (aka demise before he became a deity) but whatever happens here isnt anything 'canon', i just randomly doodled him to try a loosen up my painting style bc when i work on the comic i tend to concentrate too much of rendering it perfectly and i dont like that)

#ganondoodles #doodles #art #i am so very tired #too tired for tags #btw i do love and read every ask i get but damn i just dont have the energy to reply to most #and i feel so guilty #i wish i could make a warning show up when someone wants to send me an ask #that just says -yo i love and cherish and reread all asks but unfortunately have zero energy to reply but chances are it made me cry- #given the asks isnt mean spirited or straight up bots #which my impsoter brain sometimes still tries to make me think #like either woo look at all those people LYING to your face #but i have grown alot since those days and now its mostly just #so look what a nice and lovely absolutely beautiful ask this person send you and you disrespectful fool are not answering it shame upon you #thats most likely why i have been getting less and less and man i feel so bad #like when its asks about drawing advice i either dont know what to say bc i dont have any idea what im doing eihter #or bc i plan a giant response with a big ass illustrated tutorial even tho i know i neither got the time or energy for it #but still cant answer then bc wait you wanted to make a tutorial you cant answer it just like that #and when its a super nice compliment about my art i just #dont know how to express my gratitude and silently reread it time and time again never answering it bc then it would be gone from the inbox #;__; #alright falling asleep brain better not have written sth i will regret reading tomorrow #i think this is the longest tags i put on a completely unrelated post of mine #if you have read all these tags send me an ask only containing the name of your fav fruit and i will make you a little pixel sprite of it

[danothan]

i think above all else, i tie my aro identity to my autism. like sometimes i wonder if i’m aro just bc i’m autistic, and ykw that’s totally fine for me lol

and while we’re at it, that might be the case for my gender too. being non-binary is quite literally rejecting the binary, and being aro basically subscribes you to relationship anarchy, which also inherently rejects societal norms

that’s so peculiar to me now looking back on myself as a child. i knew romance and gender weren’t fake, but they definitely didn’t feel real lol. i wonder if other queer ppl felt this early on too, and if being neurodivergent makes a difference

i remember being incredibly frustrated every time gender was brought up with validity. “boys and girls” was like saying “cats and dogs.” it’s a phrase to communicate an idea, but we all know they’re not the only ones. romance didn’t rly frustrate me so much as it felt like participating in a game. it was fun choosing ppl to have a crush on, until i was on the receiving end. like, we’re still playing, right?

ppl always say autism means you don’t get social cues, but i don’t think i was misunderstanding anything. i think i was just questioning their value

#one time in kindergarten i was asked if i loved my mom #it was meant to be a given but i didn’t respond immediately #i just pondered it rly deeply bc i understood that ‘love’ was a strong word and i didn’t wanna just answer unthinkingly #but i was just met with a concerned look and suddenly i was overwhelmed w guilt and just started crying (damn i cry a lot dont i) #bc how dare i make my mom look bad by not saying i loved her? why did i have to think abt it shouldnt it be obvious? #idk why it translated to shame. i didn’t hesitate bc i didn’t love her i hesitated bc i wanted to make sure i meant it #i think from that day on i always questioned this idea of love in every sense of the word #that might be why i’m so obsessed w lovecore and fictional romance too. aestheticizing it naturally invites analysis #and ofc fun lol i do just love love at the end of the day #aro #genderposting #autisms #danbles #hmmm #lovecore

[suffarustuffaru]

I don’t speak Japanese so I’d LOVE to hear more about the differences between the English and Japanese Re:Zero fandoms

yeah sure its very interesting to me now that ive noticed it more lately :o !! though ok disclaimer - i dont speak japanese either hah so if anyone is seeing this and does speak japanese + is familiar with the japanese speaking side of this fandom please add info if youd like!! and of course ill be mainly speaking from the english side of things bc im more familiar with that yes (sorry anon again im not a japanese speaker T^TT so sorry if i tread on info you already know!!). but yeah im speaking from my own experiences given the Topic at hand. ive been in this fandom since... 2019?? which is so wild to me aljsdfljsd.

anyway so - i think the big difference is mainly that the english fandom and many english speaking people that engage with rezero are. to put it bluntly, misconception runs Rampant to a very Interesting degree. to the point where it seems like the english speaking side of the fandom is More. Aggressive. than the japanese fandom. not that the japanese speaking side of the fandom is perfect - also bc what fandom is ever perfect 100% of the time, tbh - but that the louder people in the english rezero fandom are. well its a Very low bar. Very low. and from what little ive seen and heard so far, the japanese fandom tends to understand rezero and its characters better than the english fandom. which ig makes sense bc you know, rezero is japanese media, and also im sure cultural differences come into play here as well (im not familiar enough on this to speak about it in depth but the cultural differences feel Pretty Clear even though i cant 100% put my finger on what they specifically are).

but also bc yeah. its not That hard to beat some of the english fandom when it comes to media comprehension. misreading rezero is unfortunately Extremely common, both in and out of the rezero community. its Everywhere - youtube, myanimelist, ao3, ff.net, reddit, twitter, various rezero discords - and from what ive experienced, rezero tumblr basically kind of feels like finding an oasis after crawling through the desert for days on end lajdslfjs. which is probs bc rezero tumblr is Smaller and also a lot of us seem to be lgbtq+ in some way or be allies, so you dodge a lot of the misogyny and homophobia that happens in other rezero english circles. its why you see a lot of openly queer rezero-related posts on here while its a bit more. barren. in other rezero english places yes. bc its more safe to post queer rezero things on rezero tumblr rather than rezero reddit for Sure.

im not sure how the japanese fandom is with that exactly but theres some interesting differences between whats popular in the english fandom vs the japanese fandom. i mean as an otto fan ive been noticing how hes more popular with the japanese fandom—and on top of that, ottosuba is Way More popular in the japanese fandom too. reinsuba and julisuba seem to usually be the most popular mlm subaru ships in both fandoms but ottosuba is like A Little Up There in the japanese fandom. not sure if its on the same level as a ship like reinsuba but ottosubas Definitely loved as a ship. from what little ive seen it also seems like ships like vichisha are more acknowledged by the japanese fandom? im not entirely sure on like—Complete differences regarding what the japanese fandom finds interesting that may differ from english fandom, so ill really have to look more into the japanese fandoms fanart and fanfic when i can bc im pretty curious too. in general though, it seems like the japanese fandom has a bit more variety…. you can find fanart on So Many characters in rezero (which already has a very Massive cast full of very fleshed out characters) there. not that you cant in the english fandom bc theres a Bit of variety too, but id more so contribute that a little more to the Big Cast and less to having actual variety in fancontent. and of course im not saying that the japanese fandom may be a bit barren in some areas of fancontent—bc inevitably when u have a big cast of characters, side character content is gonna be more sparse compared to the main characters, but to me it does feel like the english fandom lacks variety in comparison. (and also yeah. seems like the japanese fandom acknowledges gay ships more in general tbh.)

whats focused in fancontent makes it easy to tell what may be popular in a fandom in terms of how fans perceive the source material and what fandoms want to do with the source material, if that makes sense. and its very easy to tell that with the english fandom if you just hop on rezero ao3–or even better, rezero reddit given theres a fanfic ideas thread thats usually pinned right at the top of the site. again i havent looked at japanese fanfic for rezero yet (bc i dont know where to look oops ajdndn) but when it comes to the english fandom you can tell that theyre generally more focused on the female cast both in fanart and in fanfic bc. theyre women and many fans on say, reddit or various rezero discords, are cis straight men, so inevitably… well lets just say you can tell when a man makes content for this fandom o.o theres also the. very weird reaction fic trends and trends following popular fics in the fandom, the two biggest being the watching him die again and again react fic and re:forgotten, the former of which includes a harem plot with subaru and the main girls of rezero while the latter is one of those subaru gets tortured by his ooc friends and then he gets revenge on them fics. which i suppose says something about the english fandom too.

of course on ao3 its dominated mainly by english fics (of course not all fics on there for rezero are in english— big shoutout to all the non english fics on rezero ao3 ur doing great <3 — but the majority are in english). and while yeah ur occasionally gonna find stuff like queer content or side character content or rarepair content, its definitely not that big in amount and also comes with the risk of. Hate. if anyones reading this and remembers the lone star stuff. (if u dont know—lone star was a julius x emilia fic where they NTR subaru or some shit and then it got bombed with hate bc of the ship? yeah.) so yeah english fandom is very cis straight oriented, ironically with the nastiest people being the very people that rezero criticizes. though this is also my personal experience, i do know several people personally whove been in this fandom for a while or were here for a while and yeah english fandom isnt very welcoming at times???? and it seems like at the very least the japanese fandom is A Little Less Aggressive than the english fandom is.

otherwise. yeah im very very curious about more of the differences in popular content between the japanese vs english fandom. i mean the english fandom’s main focus on the female cast for. Interesting Reasons other than their actual character depth is… interesting. and the astreas being popular in general vs otto + ottosubas popularity fluctuating is also very interesting to me (but i have several guesses as to Why that is), among other things. yeah id love to know what else the japanese fandom likes about rezero and see more of their content. i also have to wonder if characters like emilia and subaru are hated less by the japanese fandom…. T^T well that and the english fandom and many english speaking people engaging in rezero have this interesting pattern of either hating subaru No Matter What, wanting subaru to Not Be Subaru (ie using him as a self insert almost or attempting to change him into virtually another character), or putting subaru on a pedestal and ignoring his flaws and mistakes and that he Can do wrong. like theres Really not a lot of nuance there. so i wonder if the japanese fandom is. A Little more chill when it comes to character opinions like this too.

#rezero #tldr: english fandom sets the bar so low (unless ur on rz tumblr) that the japanese fandom def seems a bit better by comparison #in terms of. Calmness levels. #every time i step into a rezero space that isnt tumblr i get a little worried my heads gonna get bitten off by someone HAH #recently someone tried arguing with me over how i interpret otto (this was on reddit) and then said stuff that showed they did Not #understand his character that well so that was awkward 😭😭😭 #even just by looking at otto fanart from the japanese fandom it seems like more people understand his character there. in the english fandom #he is. either Not There or his flaws are just handwaved away or replaced with Different flaws #atm hes the most obvious example i can think of when it comes to. how differently characters can be percieved by different parts of a fandom #for rezero. like hes near invisible here but ottosuba being almost on the same level as REINSUBA in jp fanbase is crazy to me #kinda reminds me of the disney’s duffy and friends line and how it failed in the us but its SUPER popular in asia. really fascinating #and also yeah some of the english fandom seems. more loudly misogynistic and homophobic which is very unfortunate #also im sorry ill never forgive that random person on reddit i just said one (1) thing on otto and they came for my throat like fr 😭😭😭 #ask #i do wonder why reinsuba is so popular but thats probs bc reinhards well loved too and also hes op. which is a bonus for the english fandom #bc theyre into all the power scaling stuff. and also reinhard gets the other bonus of being a guy and he isnt shafted by canon. hes treated #very sympathetically which is another bonus akdnsn #i say this as a reinhard fan btw but as an emilia fan im also crying bc theyre SO SIMILAR and yet why do people hate emilia…. #but u know. reins a guy and we havent got his pov yet so there isnt much to hate.

[skitskatdacat63]

And so what if I teared up over a radio from 14 years, so what??? And if I had to hold my head in my hands???? And if I actually had to sob???

#HE SOUNDS LIKE HES CRYING IM GONNA FUCKING LOSE IT #very similar vibes to seb malaysia 2015 tbh #just that fucking palpable relief i feel sickkkkkk #girls will know the results of a rave and yet still get over emotional abt it #the voice cracks im gonna sob im gonna lose it i cant do this #no bcs i watched it and was like okay 🥹 i am very normal abt this. #and then had to keep rewatching it over and over and every time theres more tears in my eyes #just that yes yes yes yes where he sounds like hes gonna break down #i feel it in my soul #f1 #formula 1 #mark webber #2009 german gp #we do a little bit of f1

[da-proti-toku-grem]

venting in the tags again bc i'm literally shaking right now wtf

#god i hate it so much #my exams start on monday and i'm not even halfway through everything i need to know for my first exam #i've had all the holidays to study but i just can't concentrate on anything #i've been in my room all day every day (except the days i spent w family like christmas and new year ofc) #and seemingly i'm studying all day #my family thinks i spend all day studying #but the only thing i'm capable of doing most of the time is stare at the things i have to do w/o having any idea of wtf i'm doing #my brain won't shut tf up and telling me stuff that i know are not true #but i just can't #i feel like i've been having an anxiety attack non stop since this monday #not very bad most of the time but it doesn't really stop yk? #and i feel like i have a weight on my chest that i can't really take off #i've been going to therapy and we've come to the conclusion that the cause of my anxiety overall are my studies #(not counting my social anxiety that's been getting worse every day to the point that i don't even want to go out with my best friends) #which doesn't really surprise me but it's just Too Much #i just want to drop everything but since idk what i'd do if i quit this career i chose to do my exams #bc maybe they are useful if i do change my path #but i just can't find it in me to focus and study because my mind is racing all the time #i just want to lie down and cry but i don't even have the strength to do that #i just feel so weak and miserable ever since i started uni and every day it gets worse and worse #my mind just screams at me saying #'stop complaining all the time. no one cares. everyone goes through stuff like that. you're no different. stfu and study like everyone does' #and i know i could do it if i tried but i just can't #why tf is it so difficult to be normal and do what i'm supposed to do for once ffs.... #venting #maca speaks

[tricoufamily]

once again thinking about how easy it would be for me to be in a relationship if i was cis

#cis woman cis man either way #dude in the neighborhood has a crush on me telling me i'm beautiful like 'thanks! i will go home and cry now' #i fucking hate being trans i wish i wasn't lol #and sometimes i feel like i can't talk about this anywhere bc in a lot of trans spaces it's like. taboo? to express anything but positivity #as if me being honest about how i feel about myself is somehow how i feel about every single trans person jesus christ but whatever whateve #like listen peace and love but i need you to do me a favor and promise me you will not come at me with any 'transness should be about joy' #i know you mean well i know you're right. but transness for me /is/ pain and sorrow. that's all it's ever caused me my entire life #you have to remember that i'm from rural appalachian tennessee with a transphobic family #some of the most deeply rooted self hating repression for years just for. more honest self hatred #i've never admitted this before but i've considered detransitioning and repressing because of transphobia many times #i'm not brave i'm not strong i'm not trying to make some grand statement or be the voice of a generation. i just want to Be. you know #i just got really really unlucky #but i can't repress. i know that would be even more miserable so i'm just. trapped. forever #who i want to be forever out of reach like tantalus or something i don't know #i want to be loved #or maybe i should just watch the batman again

[silenthillbunni]

🐰🌧️

#so on my way home.. #i walked by a school and besides the fact that i felt so depressed bc just looking at these kids and adults i have NO hope for the future #i saw two boys on a bench as i walked by... and i just thought they were talking. and too late i realized that no one of the boys were #bullying the other boy. the bully walked away and the other boy just sat there looking so lifeless and dejected #a teacher came and sat down w that boy and i just kept walking. even if i wanted to say smth it's like what would i even do abt that situati #that made me so sad both bc that boy.. he looked so dejected and used to it. that anxiety going to school knowing you're bullied is awful #and like i imagined talking to him and saying heyyy if you're lucky you'll grow up to be 25yrs old #live like a parasite off your mom and be on wellfare and never have had a job :) #you'll have no education or highschool diploma :) you will still struggle to finish hs even at an easier level :) #you will also not have had friends in 10yrs and you'll be terrified of ppl and getting close to anyone and even going outside!! #you'll have no interests and hobbies and skills! you'll simply be a waste of space loser being a burden on everyone around u! #whoop whoop stay alive buddy it will only get worse ❤️ #god i just wanna cry. how did i let my life turn out this way??? i used to be full of dreams and life and passion and HOPE #i used to believe in things and in people. i had so many dreams and i wanted to try and do so many things #now all i can think is 'i wanna die i wanna die i wanna die'. im miserable wherever i go lmao #there's this bridge over the highway i have to cross when i walk to school and every time i look down at the trafic and when a truck drives #by i feel my entire body vibrate. i just wanna jump and get mauled by it. #or i dont *want* to but i feel so deeply and desperately that it's the only way for me #only way to make it stop hurting. and i am weak. i dont know how to just 'stop' or take control of my life. thats why i wanna die #bc i know that i wont be able to. that my life will never amount to anything #for fuck's sake my dream now is just to have my own 1bedroom apartment and have a shitty job - like in a grocery store or whatever!!!!! #not even that can i make happen! bc im so worthless i cant do anything. im also stupid so i wouldnt be able to do my job right #i dont know... i dont know... these feelings and thoughts are too much i just wanna relax #but i cant bc my ribs hurt and idk if it's heartburn or an ulcer 💀 why am i even alive???? what am i doing all this for? 😭 #my thoughts ran away but i meant like seeing that reminded me of how much of a failure i became #bc of my circumstances and all the shitty ppl around me thru out my life