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thadelightfulone · 3 years

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All I Want... 25 Days of Christmas Challenge, Day 1

November 15-19th, Part 1

DeeDee Chabert put her pencil down, closed her notebooks, and checked the time. 3pm flashed across the face of her smart watch reminding her that she had one hour until she needed to be at work. Removing her glasses, she pinched the bridge of her nose before rolling the tightness from her shoulders, arms and neck.

DeeDee sighed at the familiar bookshelves in front and back of her. She was at her favorite table in the back of the John B. Cade Library right next to all the science books. She wanted to make sure she was ready to present the defense of her dissertation and had just finished up some notes.

DeeDee knocked over a few books when she stood to continue her stretch. She leaned down to pick them up, almost dropping the top book. She caught the hardbound cover and something fell out onto the floor. DeeDee put all the books back onto the table and then squatted down to pick up the slip of paper.

She took her seat again and looked at the note in her hand. It’s folded in half and rough around the edges like someone ripped it out of a spiral notebook. DeeDee opened the page and after turning it right-side up, she saw multiple chemical formulas written in the neatest penmanship she had ever seen. As she glanced at the formula compounds, she noticed a short note in the center.

LaSTiNLuV - My parents had it, that real deal, until the end of time type shit. The kind that those r&b niggas used to sing about and I want that. Honestly, I hope to find it for myself one day. I know she is out there. And I hope that I will recognize her, but also that I will be deserving of her love. _E.S.

DeeDee tried to decipher the first word of the note. She quietly laughed when she realized the person used chemical elements to write a completely different word. Referring to the periodic table of the book the note came from, she worked to interpret it.

“Lanthanum, Sulfur, Titanium, Nitrogen, Lutetium, and Vanadium equals La S Ti N Lu V.” She looked at the note again, “Lasting Love?”

DeeDee recognized the other ‘formulas’ on the page as other chemical elements put together to form words or phrases but not actual chemical compounds. There are two other such groupings on the page of the note. In the upper right-hand corner, DeeDee saw ‘MgYHeArTaNdSOULa’ and in a much smaller font scrawled at the bottom left of the page was ‘IAmHeRe.’ She deciphered the other two before setting the note and her pad of paper to the side.

“I Am Here. My Heart And Soul. Lasting Love.” That is what the person who wrote the note wanted to find, a love like their parents have or had. Taking a deep breath, she spoke aloud and laughed, “Shoot, aren’t we all?” DeeDee apologized when she heard various shushes from the bookstacks around her.

Looking at her watch, it was time to go. She folded up the note and instead of returning it to the chemistry book, she put it in her folder. Grabbing all her items, she left the library to make the drive to her job.

---

DeeDee needed to tell someone about what she found because it was the only thing she could think about all night. She called up her two best friends, Beverly and Phyllis, to get together for lunch the next day. They are her oldest and dearest friends, so they would understand her excitement about it.

Beverly and Phyllis are seated at the table when DeeDee arrived. They both stood to hug her before everyone took their seats. The waiter took their drink orders before leaving to give them time to decide on their entrees.

“Ok, so what was so important that you just had to see us?” Phyllis rushed out from across the table. Always straight to the point.

“Right, we thought you would be locked up with your books for the rest of the year before we saw our best friend again.” Beverly leaned forward with both elbows on the table.

“I mean, Thanksgiving is right around the corner. And you know I can eat.” DeeDee responds, “You would have seen me before the end of the month.”

They all laughed at DeeDee’s remark, calming down only when they saw their waiter approach the table. He set down their sweet tea and then took their order.

“Ok, so I was at the library last night and I found something.”

“Look, if it wasn’t dick then I don’t want to hear about it.” Phyllis rolled her eyes before sipping her drink.

“Phyll, stop that and let the girl speak.” Beverly bumped Phyllis’ shoulder, “Go on DeeDee, don’t mind her.”

“As I was saying, I found something while I was studying last night.” DeeDee pulled out the note. “This fell out of one of the books and it is very interesting.”

Phyllis took the note while Beverly looked at it from over her shoulder. She squinted her eyes at it before handing it over to Beverly, who just set it down on the table.

“DeeDee, you know we can’t read that. We are not fluent in the chemical language.” Beverly pushed it back towards DeeDee.

“Look at the center. I’ll explain the rest.” DeeDee slid the note back over to them.

Beverly and Phyllis took a second look before looking back at DeeDee.

“Is this for real?” Phyllis asked.

“I think so.”

“Ok, so then what do the hieroglyphics say?” Beverly set the note down in the center of the table.

DeeDee rolled her eyes at her friend’s remark, “The one in front of the note says Lasting Love. The word up here in the corner says My Heart and Soul. And this little thing down at the bottom says I Am Here.”

“And you think this is real?” Beverly repeated Phyllis’ question.

“Well, it does have some initials after it. So, why wouldn’t it be?” DeeDee took a sip of her tea.

“Note in a chemistry book? Probably some virgin who needs to get laid.” Phyllis nodded at Beverly and the two of them started to laugh.

“But what if… you know what, nevermind.” DeeDee grabbed the note and folded it back up into her small notebook.

Just then, the waiter arrived with their food. All conversation stopped until he walked away again.

Beverly looked over at Phyllis before addressing DeeDee, “Hey, what is it?”

“I don’t know, I guess I am just curious about the author of the note.” DeeDee shrugged, “Like who would write something like this, hoping for a lasting love like their parents and then leave it in a book?”

“I already answered that.” Phyllis said before taking a bite of her salad.

“I’m serious, Phyll.” DeeDee spoke as she plucked a fry off her plate.

“Ok, so what if it is a student here. Then what? What are you going to do?” Phyllis spoke as she waved her fork in the air.

“I don’t know. I guess I would have to find them first and decide for myself.” DeeDee shrugged.

“But what if an ugly guy wrote this?” Beverly cringed at the thought.

“Bev, you already know it. Someone with his head so far in the books he doesn’t know anything else.” Phyllis shoulder checked Beverly and glanced over at DeeDee, “Just like someone else we know.”

DeeDee blankly stared in their direction. While everyone makes fun of her for always studying and not having any kind of personal life, they have no idea of the closet romantic hidden inside of her. She loves love, but never looked or hoped for it like this guy. No, an ugly person would not write about something as sweet and genuine as this. DeeDee did not believe that for a second.

“He sounds like a great guy. I mean he spoke of knowing that she is out there and hoping to be worthy of her. How sweet is that?” Her eyes sparkled as she recalled the words now embedded in her head.

“Really?” Phyllis shook her head as DeeDee nodded hers, “Well, now you know what you gotta do. You gotta find out who wrote that.”

Beverly claps her hands together in excitement as DeeDee’s face fell.

“What? No. I don’t think --,” DeeDee sputtered. She cleared her throat and started again, “I don’t know if I can.”

“Yes, you can. If anyone can figure out who wrote that note and left it there -- last week, last month, last year; it’s you.” Beverly spoke up.

“You guys really think that I should do this?”

“Yes!” Both answer together.

“Ok, then, I guess it’s time to find out who this E.S. is?” DeeDee and her friends shared a smile.

---

DeeDee slowly walked into the library and headed straight to the circulation desk. She couldn’t believe that she allowed her friends to talk her into doing this. Holding her notebook in a death grip, she reached her favorite librarian, working the front desk.

“Hey DeeDee. What brings you in today?” Ms. Jacobsen asks her.

“Hi Ms. Jacobsen. I actually have a huge favor to ask.” DeeDee says. “I found some notes in one of the books I had out the other day. Do you think you can tell me who last checked out the book?”

Ms. Jacobsen peeked past DeeDee, slowly turning around in her chair while surveying the first floor of the library, before she looked back at her. She stood up and moved to another computer on her left, signaling for DeeDee to follow her.

“I know that you only want to return those notes to the rightful owner, so I can do this one favor for you.” Ms. Jacobsen finally answered. “So, what is the name of the book that you checked out?”

“It was ‘Elements of Molecular and Biomolecular Electrochemistry’ by Saveant and Costentin.” DeeDee responded.

DeeDee set down the notebook and attentively watched as Ms. Jacobsen started tapping away on the keyboard. She decided that watching Ms. Jacobsen was making her more nervous than kind of fibbing to the woman. No need to get her hopes up, if nothing came from the search for her mystery man.

‘Her mystery man?’ Where did that even come from? She knew nothing about him except that at some point he felt it necessary to put these very words to paper. The man could be married with children or a complete psycho. DeeDee closed her eyes, trying to relax. If Ms. Jacobsen doesn’t give her a name, then she can drop this whole thing and focus on her next career move.

DeeDee looked up when she heard Ms. Jacobsen sigh loudly.

“I’m sorry, dear. I don’t think you will find them on campus.” Ms. Jacobsen huffed out and then lifted her glasses to her face. “It has been 10 years since that book was checked out.”

DeeDee rapidly blinked at the information. “10 years?” She screeched at the older woman.

“Yes, honey.” Ms. Jacobsen nodded and turned the computer screen towards DeeDee. “By one, Erik Stevens.”

DeeDee tried to hide her smile. The mystery man has a name.

“Erik Stevens.” DeeDee said his name out loud, then took a deep breath. “Ok. Well, thank you, Ms. Jacobsen. I’ll talk to you later.” DeeDee waved to her before walking past the desk towards her study space in the back.

DeeDee dropped her things on the table before getting out her laptop. She opened a new browser and pulled up the school’s website. When DeeDee searched Erik Stevens, the first result was an article titled ‘Computer Science and Chemistry Majors share the 2010 Graduate Student of the Year title’. On the front page was a picture of the winners.

“Computer Science, huh? Then what did he need with that book?” DeeDee mumbled while typing in her next search for the Computer Science department. She wrote down what she needed and put her laptop away.

---

DeeDee entered the classroom during the meeting and took a seat in the back until it was over. When the room cleared out, she walked over to the faculty advisor standing at the front of the room wiping off the board.

“Excuse me, I wanted to ask about a former student of this department.” DeeDee asked in a shaky voice.

“It depends on what you want to ask me.” The faculty member replied, setting down the eraser.

“He won Graduate Student of the Year in --”

“Oh, you mean Erik Stevens?” The professor laughed while DeeDee looked on in confusion, “Now him, I can talk about. Come with me.” She waved for DeeDee to follow.

They walked into the office next door, and the professor pointed out a chair for DeeDee to sit.

“My name is Sheila Giacomo. I actually had the pleasure of teaching and mentoring Erik while he was here. So, what do you want to know?”

“How did you know I was talking about Erik? I never even said his name.” DeeDee finally spoke again.

“You said he won Grad Student of the Year. Only one student has ever won that honor during my whole tenure in this department.” Sheila answered.

“I was wondering what you can tell me about him.”

Sheila sat back in her desk chair. “Mr. Stevens was not your typical ‘head in the books’ student, like most would expect from any kind of science major. He was a very inquisitive, reserved and athletic young man, but when you put numbers and tech in front of him, it was almost magical how he came alive.”

“What year did he graduate from Southern?”

“With his master’s, the same year he won the award. I think that was 2010. After that, I heard he moved back home to California.”

“Do you know what brought him to Southern?”

“Something about his family and legacy, but I never found out what.” Sheila straightened up and looked at DeeDee. “Are you writing a story about him?”

“Ummmm no, I came across a paper he wrote and figured he might still be on campus or something.” DeeDee stood up, “I didn’t mean to bother you, but thank you for sharing.”

“It’s no problem. And if you are still looking for information, you may want to reach out to the other winner from that year.” Sheila stood and walked DeeDee to the door, “They were good friends and collaborated on the project that earned them the honor.”

“Thanks again for everything, Sheila.” DeeDee waved and left the office.

As she walked away, DeeDee looked down at the other information on her notepad from her earlier search. Marquis Oubre was the name of the other student who won with Erik Stevens. She continued her walk to her car, prepared to head home. There will be plenty of time to talk to Mr. Oubre.

@teakturn @ghostfacekill-monger @shaekingshitup @nahimjustfeelingit-writes

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#25 days of christmas challenge #erik killmonger x oc #black panther fanfiction #bp christmas #all i want #thadelightfulone

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heuristicallyinclined · 3 years

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SPF Five Million or Whatever

Summary: Mspa Reader figures they need some sunlight and recruits a few friends to help them get it.

Rating: T for language

Notes: I haven't written any of the jades before and I really love them and tried my best to capture their dynamic. I really love imagining Mspa Reader's adventures between Friendsim and Pesterquest. I feel like the games were really just scratching the surface of their shenanigans.

(AO3)

You are pretty sure that people need about twenty minutes of sunlight a day to stay healthy.

Or at least that is what you think it is. You never really thought about it too much to be honest. Having spent a decent amount of time outside walking, you figured you were getting your daily dose in without much effort, and maybe you just didn’t realize how good you had it, not living on a planet that even passively was trying to kill you. Because right now, you know for a fact you’re getting the ideal amount of sunlight on Alternia, which in your personal experience is fucking ziltch.

You tried it once and learned pretty fast that what might leave you with a healthy glow on Earth, would leave you well done on Alternia, a disgusting state for any piece of meat to be in, let alone your body. So that was clearly an Earth exclusive recommendation.

Still, you think some sunlight would do you good.

Especially since you were starting to feel this constant exhaustion after a few months on Alternia. After ruling out your questionable diet and semi existent sleep schedule, you were left with the fact that you were likely getting a vitamin D deficiency.

Frankly, you have not survived your various trials and many tribulations here on Alternia to let rickets be what finally kills you. Absolutely not. No. You’re too proud to die in the lamest way possible on a planet with significantly more respectable and less preventable ways of dying.

This does mean you’ll have to face off with the Alternian sun, which really isn’t that much better on the lame death scale. Last time you got caught out during daylight, you got really lucky. You aren’t counting on a second time where a gorgeous cowgirl, alien Lassie, and a lot of dumb luck would happen to rescue you from your own poor life choices.

So this time, you were going to try to be smart about doing something this monumentally stupid. You were going to get water, a floppy hat, and some ice packs. Now you just had to not do this alone, especially when you knew someone who touted the merits of the buddy system.

Luckily, you also know a few people who could withstand the sun’s rays.

Finding out that jadeblood sun resistance was in fact a real thing and not just the latest in fucking with the local alien made this a whole lot easier and left you with a few options to consider. You figured Wanshi was too young to be kept up that late and that you’d rather not traumatize her if this went sideways. Bronya mentioned being busy with a new brood hatching and managing the herd of lusii they attracted to the caverns so that was a no go. Lanque would likely be otherwise occupied or at least claim to be and you’d rather him not see you like this if you could help it. That left you with Daraya, who you knew would be up and likely be down for some alien shenanigans. But most importantly, Lynera.

One massive check in her favor is she already had experience inconspicuously carrying your injured body through the caverns unnoticed by literally anyone else to a secondary location So discretion was clearly already a strong suit of hers. The context for how she even got that much experience in the first place is none of your business, especially now that you’re friends. And you’d say you two were actually pretty close after all the time you’ve spent hanging out with her in the caverns and going out on little cafe trips.

Really, she was the ideal candidate for this by every observable metric. Well, almost.

While she is loyal enough that you knew that she would help you hide a body if asked, she has also threatened enough people for perceived slights against you that she would very likely be the reason there was a corpse hanging around in the first place. So having Daraya be there too was probably a safe move.

Oh it’s all coming together now.

You were feeling really good about this. Your confidence in yourself, your friends, and your planning abilities carried you through two difficult conversations. One with a veneer of apathy trying to conceal some very real concern, the other incredibly loud and extremely worried, but you got through them and that’s what matters.

So here you are at the brooding caverns, tucked away inside the turn just before the mouth, clad in some cool guy shades from Cirava, a sun hat from Charun, some shorts from Remele, and a Xoloto brand tank top complete with strategic ripping that makes it basically impossible to wear anywhere in public without a layer underneath.

Your friends are right here with you. Lynera is alternating between pacing and fretting over the placement of your sun hat for the seventh time to really make sure your hair doesn’t ignite. You know it won’t and you told her it won’t, but you let her fuss. She just needs to do something with her hands to stay calm. You can at least let her have that with what you’re about to do. Daraya checks her palm husk again for the time as dawn steadily approaches. You take a deep breath in, psyching yourself up.

So you never actually figured out what the Alternian sun equivalent to twenty minutes of Earth sun is. But you think a minute should be enough to do it and not pass out. It feels about right. You have based this off of no math whatsoever, but you’ve done worse with less prep, so you’re not going to let some nerd shit stop you. Especially not now, when you hear Daraya sigh. You know that it’s show time.

You look at her to confirm as she pockets her device and you see some light begin to stretch into the cavern’s entrance. She looks at it too, frowning as it approaches.

“▲▲ try not to fry your pan ▼▼"

You give her a reassuring smile and run up through the mouth of the cave, and stop just past the entrance, arms up wide and outstretched, like you were doing the YMCA dance and lost rhythm just past the first letter, ready to receive that sunlight you so desperately craved. The sun hits your skin and there is a comfort in feeling’s its warmth after living in eternal night.

You really missed this.

...

Actually, you know what? No you don’t. Fuck this.

That “gentle warmth” quickly became a scorching blaze and to your credit, you made it a solid ten seconds under the full wrath of that relentless bitch they called a sun before you decided to quit while you were ahead and conscious. You dash back towards the entrance, uncomfortably aware of every step you take. Lynera stops nervously pacing and stiffens when you reenter the shade and runs towards you. Daraya is ready and quickly hands you a water bottle. You struggle to open the cap because of the condensation making the bottle slick and it exacerbates the painful tingle you’re feeling all over your hands. And your face. And your everything actually.

You continue struggling until you finally succeed in twisting the cap off, but your victory immediately proves to be a hollow one, as your tight grip on the bottle has water going everywhere.

God. Damn. It.

You’re vaguely cognisant of a screeching sound somewhere behind you, but you have more important concerns right now. By some absolute miracle, a decent amount of the water seems to have gotten on you and saturated your top, soothing the skin under it. You feel less like you’re on fire and more like you had marinated your entire body in icy-hot for a few hours before getting deep fried.

You’d like to believe that that is a much more manageable situation. Your skin can’t tell much of a difference though so you waste no time and pour the rest out all over your face like you were a champ who just scored the winning goal instead of a dipshit speedrunning skin cancer.

Daraya mercifully cracks a cold one with the boys and pours the contents of another water bottle on you like you were a plant she forgot to water. The cool sensation on your skin causes you to sigh in a relief that doesn’t last long, before you lose contact with the ground. Lynera has you thrown over her shoulder and starts quickly making her way back into the caverns to her respiteblock. The physical contact takes that previous painful tingle and absolutely fucking floors it, bringing you to a familiar world of pain that your ass was very content not revisiting. Daraya keeps pace behind the two of you with her arms crossed the face of someone who is totally not panicked.

You try to calm them, telling them you feel better already. Really, you mean it.

This just causes Lynera to speed up and Daraya to grimace down at you instead of giving you an actual response.

While, yes, you resent having flesh, you actually feel really awake right now.

Daraya narrows her eyes. “▲▲ you mean from the pain? ▼▼”

No. No. That's different. And way more familiar.

God. Despite looking like a freshly hatched octogenarian, Lynera can really book it.

She carries your limp, increasingly dizzy body with ease. You knew she was deceptively strong and fast first hand, based off of her being able to immediately able to knock you the fuck out and lug you back to her combination study block murder dungeon. Honestly, being able to do anything with an alien discreetly deserves commendation. Commendation up and out the wazoo.

You’re about to attempt to try to verbalize that thought, but just before the turn to get to Lynera's study block, she suddenly stops. She nervously glances between this hallway and another adjacent one one. Daraya almost bumps into her but stops herself just in time.

"▲▲▲ what are you doing? We said we were just going to put them in a spare recuperacoon ▼▼▼" Daraya whisper yells.

"They're a new color Daraya !!!" Lynera whisper yells to the point of negating the whisper part of the whisper yell and more just using a normal speaking volume with a hiss. “-they need !!! A medicull kit !!!”

Oh. You glance down at one of your dangling arms. That happened fast. In retrospect, you should have mentioned that was a thing that would potentially happen. How did you forget that?

“▲▲▲ and do what? A medicull kit could make them worse. We don’t know shit about aliens ▼▼▼”

“-!!! well how would you know all of their injuries were taken care of! that we didnt miss anything!”

“▲ they’re fine. We just, I don't fucking know? Rotate them in the slime? ▼”

“-like some sort of !!! rotisserie cluckbeast !!!” Lynera indignantly whisper shrieks.

"▲▲ No!▼▼" Daraya quickly defends. The way her eyes quickly glance to the side seems to imply that's kind of exactly what it's like.

Just like them rotisserie chickens.

The longer their arguing went on, the more uncomfortably aware you were getting about the fact that you had a body and Lynera's clothes felt like steel wool grating against your poor skin. That and describing what they were doing as “whisper arguing” was becoming more and more of a stretch as it went on and started to get louder. You were worried you were going to attract unwanted attention.

It is as soon as you have that thought, that a door opens, and you see an irritated Lanque groggily peek his head through to find the source of the commotion.

His face remains still at first, blinking tiredly as he takes in the fuckery and only opens the door wider when the other two turn at the sound of his door opening and he registers you slumped over Lynera’s shoulder with a single raised brow.

You smile and wave at him, despite how lightheaded her turn had you feeling, and Daraya quickly pulls your hand down and stands in front of you like there was nothing to see here. You let out a weak, “ow,” as she did, your flesh protesting at the touch. She glances back at you quickly, before exasperatedly turning to look back at Lanque with her arms crossed.

“▲▲ what? ▼▼”

He measuredly looks at the scene before him. Really taking in all of the bullshit before side eyeing Lynera.

“You threW the alien into broad daylight? EVen for you, that's crazy.” He almost sounds surprised, before smiling sweetly, “NoW Who’s going to tolerate you?”

Lynera sputters something, clearly offended, but Daraya cuts her off with a groan,

“▲ they literally need sunlight to live Lanque ▼”

His face twists. “Are they a fucking plant?”

“-no!!!" Lynera considers for a moment before yelling again just as loud. “-most likely not!!!”

He looks from your trio, to the small puddle of water forming under you, and glances back to the trail of water you apparently had dripping from you this whole time.

You know, you’re really starting to see the plant angle here.

“▲▲ look they just needed some stupid sunlight and we hung around to make sure they didn’t just get too cooked or whatever. What, are you going to tell Bronya on us? ▼▼" Daraya half mocks, half asks.

“No, of course not.” Lanque almost seems offended. “I don’t see any reason to inVolVe myself With you tWo Watching the alien give themselVes sun sickness.”

You ask no one in particular what sun sickness is.

“-can aliens get sun sickness???” Lynera asks with a newfound panic.

Lanque irritatedly replies, “HoW Would I knoW?”

You feel briefly dejected that no one answered. Until another thought crosses your mind. It wasn’t related to anything occurring at the moment, but it was weird enough that you don’t know how this was the first time you had ever really thought about it. Maybe the events of this morning were what it took for you to even be able consider this quandary.

Why do they say troll before a name? Like troll Will Smith? Doesn’t that imply there is another kind of WIll Smith? Like if they’re all trolls, why say troll? Oh shit, is that why they do it? Did you tell them about human Will Smith or would that be like human Whillh Smithh? Human Willhh Smyyth?

You rack your mind for other ways of making Will Smith a valid troll name, concentration evident on your face.

Lanque looks at you like you’re an idiot. “What the fuck are you talking about? You're just repeating the same name.”

The spelling? You narrow your eyes as you consider the spelling. It is the clearest thing in the world right now to you. It’s spelled different Lanque.

“I can’t hear how it’s spelled.”

Daraya’s eyes widen. "▲▲ They fried their fucking pan ▼▼ "

You still don’t know what sun sickness is, but you strongly suspect you may have it, especially since most of what happened afterwards was kind of a blur.

What you think you can remember is the sound of someone coming. Quick, determined footsteps that you couldn’t recognize, but Lynera clearly could as she stiffened first. She maybe said something about Bronya doing a curfew round? You think? Either way, it had everyone else on immediate edge and was enough for Lanque to decide this wasn’t worth staying awake for. He made a final comment and you heard a door shut, leaving your trio behind.

Daraya and Lynera exchanged words, finally remembering the “whisper” part of whisper yelling. They came to an agreement of some sort with Lynera nodding and heading to her studyblock and Daraya going off in the direction of what was probably Bronya.

Mentally, you are pressing F to pay your respects. Physically though, you register your orientation rapidly shifting. While you weren’t crazy about your position over Lynera's shoulder, what with her sweater vest grating against your torso and all, it turns out you enjoyed being moved out of it even less. The blood running away from your head had you feeling woozy in a whole new way.

To her credit, Lynera did not just immediately dunk you into the recuperacoon a la Space Jam like you’re sure she wanted to. She instead carefully lets you sink into it with a gentleness that starkly contrasted her worry. Normally, you would say that being put into a vat of slime is not an experience you would be looking forward to. Right now though, you’re loving it. It is an absolute godsend as it acts a cool balm against your skin.

Lynera continues and gingerly removes your shades and places them on an end table next to your sunhat. You were about to thank her and let her know she was in fact “a real one,” but you got cut off by her grabbing a handful of slime and smearing it on your face.

You sputter and instinctively try to move away, but you’re no match for her. She’s dealt with fussy grubs with sharp teeth for way too long to actually be deterred by your feeble efforts to resist. You don’t know how you’d rate the experience between, “children haphazardly covering you in slick grease paint” to “alien clay mask ensuring you don’t have enough skin to even entertain having clogged pores,” but you aren’t in a position to be opposed to it. It actually feels kinda nice when it’s in a smooth, even layer and not a huge fucking dollop on your face.

When she’s done, she wipes her hands while saying something to you. You don’t really register it, so you just kinda smile and nod. It’s your usual go to when you aren’t quite sure what is happening around you and it hasn’t led you too astray in the very many times you’ve done it. You’ll just ask her what she said in the evening.

Lynera seems pleased and starts moving to turn off the lights. Before she does, you thank her. She smiles at you, the corners of her eyes crinkling, and glances back at you as she goes, leaving you feeling warm inside and out for two extremely different reasons.

You settle down, trying to get cozy. You're not going to pretend you know much about sopor slime. You assumed it comes from a plant and haven't tried to confirm that little theory of yours because you need to believe that for your own sake. It's plant goo. From some kind of alien aloe vera or something. An extremely fleshy plant just ripe with goo for the taking. If you ever learn otherwise, no you didn't.

After you wake up and wipe off the slime, you find that you’ve healed surprisingly quickly. You’re still very tender to the touch, you find that out real fast, but your skin looks a lot less irritated than when you last saw it. This bit of good news and vitamin d that you assume you now have coursing through your veins that hopefully was not mostly used up on healing your skin, puts a little pep in your step as you get ready for the night. Before you exit the caverns, you feel a pang of hunger.

You can practically hear Bronya reminding you how breakfast is the most important meal of the day, so you walk into the meal block, figuring that no one would mind too much if you grabbed a breakfast bar or two before you left. Maybe you’ll even get lucky and find the ones that kind of taste like peanut butter and are crunchy for reasons you’d rather not identify. You aren’t alone when you enter. Lanque is there, sitting at a table. He looks up from his palm husk and eyes you.

“Did you change color?”

Yeah. Humans being exposed to sunlight makes them create a protective pigment so they're more able to be exposed to the sun.

“I’m fascinated.” he says, anything but. “So you're going to turn jade?”

No, more of a slightly darker version of what you are now.

He hums, now totally disinterested and looking back down at his chittr feed. Guess the limits of your rainbowdrinker like attributes have worn off on him.

Anyways, this just means that this will be easier next time you go out during the day.

That statement gives him pause. Lanque looks up from his palm husk, looking out before glancing at you dubiously.

"Next time?"

#hiveswap #hiveswap friendsim #Lynera Skalbi #Daraya Jonjet #Lanque Bombyx #Mspa Reader #This is just me having fun and getting real stupid enjoy #Can you tell I love Lynera?

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saturno-sol · 3 years

Text

The Brainrot has gotten to me

WELL HERE YOU GO FOLKS (almost) ALL MY NOTES ON WYRMTHREAD (Chantilly/Quezal) both in Canon and in a Happier AU because yes Most put under a readmore because its over 1K long and the very end has some suggestive things because I’m allowed to think like that too so just as a heads up

Anyways here

Canon Codex

Do not establish a relationship outside of a blooming interest in each other that gets nipped in the bud due to...yeah cries

So let us not delve too deeply into Canon rn, and sadly since the plot absolutely needs Chantilly gone to progress we turn to HAPPIER AUS!!!!! :DDDDD because I drove myself deep into brainrot and aoughhhhghhhghhhhghh

Songs I associate with canon because music is good-

I THOUGHT YOU WANTED TO DANCE by Tyler the Creator

Mr Loverman by Ricky Montgomery

Rest Easy, I’ll See You Again by Cuco (the title is a LIE)

Pain by Pinkpantheress

La Gata Bajo la Lluvia by Rocío Dúrcal

The Night We Met by Lord Huron (thank you Jaxx)

Noche No Te Vayas by Los Tres Caballeros

Better Timeline AU!!!!

Placeholder name but honestly it might stick because I’m too lazy to think up of a better one hghfdnkj, am open to suggestions tho

Basic Premise of this AU: Through some magic fuckery or whatever, Chantilly is allowed out of the Troupe and decides to tag along with our funky wyrm gal because nowhere else to go/hrnng big lady pretty. They actually do start going out and it turns out hey! They like each other, like a lot.

They like each other so much that they get married and bam, WyrmThread real

This is great because not only is my otp now canon and alive, Fuego (and later on Lune when Fuego adoptskidnaps them into the family) now has both parents! And they love their kids sm like damn do not get in between them else you want to get yeeted to Unalive World.

In this one, the motivations for [REDACTED] have now morphed into somewhat the same way in terms of being dealt with but now we got the lacey boy to help Quezal do [SPOILERS], fight [SPOILERS] and help complete [SPOILERS] and help establish her empire. (I’m sorry but I am not revealing any important Codex spoilers yet)

“Will you be the Malfina to my Connecticut Clark?”

Girlboss and Malewife, except they’re both still murderous and would happily see you to your grave if you intervene with any of their plans. I’ve given Chantilly throwing knives :) because he deserves to be dangerous.

He deserves to look cool!! With knives!!! Fighting alongside his wifey!!

Of course NKG fucks off when Chantilly leaves the Troupe but I love to think of him being akin to a disapproving in-law (“Really Chantilly?? You run off and marry some wyrm that didn’t even have a kingdom to begin with? Have the standards of the Nightmare Vessels deteriorated as time went on?”)

Chantilly is somewhat concerned that Fuego is much more, for lack of a better word, feral than a regular Grimmchild would be but he doesn’t regret the decision to have him. He loves his bitey son even if he scratches through fabrics like water.

And Quezal enjoys having another person to coil around and snarl at anyone that gets too close to them. It does take a while until they’re like velcro due to her issues with touch being equated to violence (Thanks dad /s) but once she overcomes that fight or flight response she absolutely does not let go of him.

Burrowing into a dark place and nuzzling until he smells like her makes Wyrm brain go brr. And since he isn’t a wyrm there’s no instinct yelling at her to maim him if there’s no babies to take care of/mating season passed, he in her eyes is harmless. Even if they both know different, at least in her brain he is just a lil guy, no threat to her.

Chantilly loves all the attention he’s getting from her, absolutely will allow her to carry him off and coil up against him as long as he can work on sewing while she broods over him.

He’s naturally warm and for a wyrm that needs outside heat to regulate her inner temp like a snake he’s like a hot water bottle, world cold husband warm.

Happby family can these Queers be HAPPY PLEASE

Love languages!!!

Quezal once she gets comfortable with physical stuff likes to nuzzle and bite :) but not to draw any hemo or cause harm, just to hold in mouth. She also likes to do acts of service, making sure that her husband is wont for nothing and doing little things like sharpening his knives for him.

Chantilly loves to gift-give! Usually things he made by hand.

“Quezal pls let me make you pretty dresses and outfits please you would so look good in teal”

He likes kissing a lot, smoochies for wife and cuddling is great for him too, as long as he can sleep with his chest unobstructed he’s good

They both love showing each other off

“Look at my partner they’re the fucking best ever, none of you bitches can compare to them.”

When the empire is finally formed and Quezal takes her place as Empress she offers the title of Emperor to Chantilly

He declines, Royal titles are just not his thing and he feels uncomfortable with them, so instead he goes by the title of “Lord”

His duties consist of assisting with any paperwork Quezal doesn’t want to deal with and being eye candy (/j but also not really he loves being shown off esp in new outfits)

He also deals with nobles that aren’t too pushy, the ones that do are quickly steered towards Quezal. And usually after a meeting with her they learn better than to try to smart mouth either of them.

Family Notes!

Chantilly’s the one to go to if you need advice and soothing comfort

Quezal’s the one to go to if you need someone beat the fuck up and also advice but in the no nonsense way.

She also comforts but it's not in the way that Chantilly will delicately soothe the pains away, she tells you how it is but will hug you and tuck you into bed if wanted.

On the other hand, Chantilly is the one Fuego and Lune go to if they want to do something crazy or stupid and know that mom won’t say yes.

He dresses them up in poofy outfits (see the clown costume I’ve thrown on Fuego as an example) and shows them off to Quezal

“Look my dear! Aren’t they the sweetest things you have seen!”

It is very funny

SONGS I ASSOCIATE WITH THIS AU

Meet Me At Our Spot by WILLOW

First Love/ Late Spring by Mitski

I Hear A Symphony by Cody Fry

She’s My Collar by the Gorillaz

My Kind of Woman by Mac DeMarco

New Light by John Mayer

Vivir by Jardin

coffee by Miguel

Never Getting Rid of Me from the Waitress Musical

WARNING WARNING

Ok next few am going to be a bit suggestive so stop here if you’re not into that but

I’m debating on if they’d have more children than Fuego and Lune and if so, how many HDJFJKSJ (thinking of twins named Arco and Iris because Arcoiris means Rainbow and I kind of like that and I’m also a sucker for twins)

Listen, they’re both switches but most if not all the time Quezal’s the one topping. The man is submissive and breedable what do you expect HDJFJS

s i z e D i f f e r e n c e

Chantilly is a sensual romantic and loves a lot of buildup while Quezal just wants to get on with the good stuff, they make it work with communication and understanding each other :)

They’re both capable of carrying so if they did have more kids I’d imagine they’d take turns on who’s turn it is to be eggy. (And I have so many thoughts about how they’d treat each other while pregnant but HHHHFJFJFHHHF too embarrassed rn waagaghgg)

These two love each other very much and I love them.

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tams-writeblr · 3 years

Text

Once I'm gone

Rating: M(ature) Warnings: major character death Category: F/M (main couple), Multi (side characters) Fandom: Attack on Titan / Shingeki no Kyojin Relationship: Mikasa Ackermann / Eren Jaeger | various side couples Characters: Eren Jaeger, Mikasa Ackermann, Armin Arlelt, Zeke Jaeger, Hange Zoe, Floch Forster, Ymir, Reiner Braun, Pieck Finger, Historia Reiss, several others will make a cameo Additional Tags: Modern AU | established relationship | toxic behaviour | Eren suffers from Huntington’s disease and tries to settle his matters before he dies | suicial blockhead Eren | aged up characters (by ten years) | suicide tw | depression tw | mental diseases tw | deathly diseases tw | this is clearly not write what you know, but I’m giving my very best to representate the topics as good as I can | this all basically came to me as a fever dream | you remember Thirteen from House, M.D.? I still have a huge crush on her so this version of Eren is greatly inspired by her <3 Language: English (not native, I’m trying my best you guys) Stats: ongoing - Chapter 1/15 - Part ¾ - 956 of 3652 words Summary: Eren Jaeger knew for years that he inherited Huntington’s disease from his late mother. When he first notices symptoms on him, his long protected plan, to end his life before reaching the critical state of his illness, awakes. But there is still Mikasa, his girlfriend and the only person in the world he cares about more than about himself, and he can’t leave her alone and grieving. It’s time to find a substitute for when Eren is gone. With the help of a new friend Eren tries to scare away Mikasa while driving her into the arms of someone new.

__________________________________________________

Charlatans and Pills - Part 4/4

<<previous

“Hey Babe, I’m back home!”

Eren quickly put his spoon by his side and pulled down the temperature of the stove. “I’m in the kitchen!”

“Hm, that smells really good”, Mikasa’s voice toned only seconds later. She put her hands on his shoulder blades and started drawing circles with her fingers. “How was your appointment with Dr. Hans, Babe?”

Eren turned around under Mikasa’s touch, holding her wrists in his hands.

From a long day on patrol her face was tired but satisfied, her chin long hair seemed to be freshly washed and shimmered from the striplight above the stove. A small scar beneath her right eye, a leaving from an operation nearly going wrong, was the only thing that wasn’t perfect on her face, but Eren was so used to it, that it just belonged to Mikasa’s face.

“Good”, he answered brusquely and quickly pecked her lips. Then he turned back around to the frying vegetables in his pan. “They only gave me a new prescription. But you know, that I don’t have to take them. I am fine. You are my antidepressivum.”

Mikasa snuggled against his back. “You are so cute. What goods are we having tonight?”

“I made fish for you. I’ll have black bread with the ratatouille.”

“Sounds tempting”, she murmured sleepily towards his back.

“Have had a hard day, Sweetie?”

Mikasa nodded between his shoulder blades. “A missing kid. They’ve sent out divers and everyone. Luckily the little varmint only wanted to go to his favourite playground and got lost. An elderly woman found him and took him home with her, feeding him cookies and milk before calling the police. Jean is still doing the paperwork, thank goodness it’s his turn this week.”

Eren smiled. He liked listening to Mikasa talk about work. She was experiencing so much, of course police officers had to be hard dogs. “I’m glad nothing bad happened to the kid.” He gently took Mikasa’s shoulders between his hands and guarded her towards the kitchen unit, having her sit down on a stool. Now free to move how he liked to, Eren continued his work around the kitchen while Mikasa’s almost black button eyes followed his every move. Finally he served the food on big, square plates. “Bon Appetit”, he laughed, got the bag with the black bread and sat next to his girlfriend.

They ate in silence. Eren hadn’t told Mikasa about the happening a few days earlier and he didn’t plan on changing that. She was worrying enough about him, he didn’t have to cause unnecessary drama. Still he had to tell her that he was going to see Zeke from now on. But telling her the true cause? No, he really didn’t want more long conversations.

Four years ago, when his mother died, Eren already told her that he had set his mind on ending his life and Mikasa, well, she didn’t really take it well. Under tears she had told promised him to stay by his side until the bitter end and he should never ever say anything as stupid as that again. He never again talked about these plans.

“I’ve been contemplating”, he murmured lowly when eating half of his dinner. “I'm going to go see Zeke’s group eventually. Maybe it’s really helping to talk to other doomed and suicidal people. Morituri te salutant.”

Mikasa couldn’t laugh about his grim sense of humor and gave him a punch with her elbow. "Drop it, Eren. Don’t talk as sloppily about this. But it’s good in my opinion that you finally changed your mind about going. Your brother wants you to join his group ever since the incident with your mother.”

“Yeah, yeah”, Eren sighed and rolled his eyes. “Good ol’ Zeke, always thinking about my wellbeing.”

“He even became a psychologist because of you”, Mikasa outranged. “I think you could be a little more grateful.”

“I never asked him to. And by the way, that’s just a rumor going around heavily on our family reunions. I mean, his part of the family isn’t particularly fond of me.”

Zeke was the son of their mutual father from his first marriage, ten years older than Eren and opposite to him, sickeningly healthy and a “genius”. As a child Eren had looked up to Zeke and had adored him but since hitting puberty he felt the footprints of his brother way too big for him to fill.

“If he’s talking too much smart rubbish, I’ll never go there again.”

>>next

__________________________________________________ Author’s note: Yay for some EreMika interaction! I know, it's not much but we're not in a hurry, are we guys? There's really not that much to say after this part, only that I am really grateful for the likes I got on the previous parts. Thanks for reading guys! I also applied for an ao3 invitation today and it said, I'd get answer by May 3rd. I'm kinda excited! See you soon for chapter 2 with some Armin content!

#attack on titan fanfiction #aot ff #eremika #eren jaeger #mikasa ackermann #zeke jaeger #once i'm gone #once i'm gone chap 1 #once i'm gone chap 1 part 4 #eren jaeger x mikasa ackermann #writers on tumblr #fanfiction on tumblr #fanfiction #fanfic #writing #mentions of suicide tw

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ghostgothgeek · 3 years

Text

Blush. Chapter 7

Hello! Finally another update!

Rated M for language and actual sex ed talk.

FFN || AO3

---

“Hey guys,” Sam smiled warmly at her two friends as she shut her locker. “How’s it going on your end?”

Danny didn’t look directly at her, but muttered a “hey”.

Tucker snickered next to him. “Oh, I think Danny is having the time of his life!” Danny elbowed him in the ribs, “Ow! Hey, I even used a life or death pun for you!”

“That bad, huh?” Sam laughed. “Can’t say I’m doing any better though. By the way, Danny, I’m going to have to...warn you about a few things. Your secret is still safe, but there’s still going to be gossip about you. Both of your halves.” Sam shut her brain down before she went back to that fantasy. “Sorry, I really tried. The girls at this school are indubitably so fucking stupid, they wouldn’t know what the actual truth is, even if it bit them on the nose. Honestly, how they even made it to twelfth grade is beyond me.”

Tucker noticed Sam getting all worked up and frowned. “Hey, the day’s almost over though!”

“Huh? Wait, what do you mean gossip?” Danny finally looked up at her.

“Ugh, Paulina has some twisted thoughts.” Sam rubbed the sides of her head as she tried to calm down. “She’s been the biggest pain in the ass all day. Just be prepared for any gossip that Phantom flies commando, and know that I tried to stop it.”

Danny’s eyes went wide, “why would they-?”

Tucker busted out laughing, “You HAVE to tell me how that happened!”

“Ugh guys, please not now.” She grabbed each of their shirts and pulled them towards the cafeteria.

“Man, I wish I had my PDA! I hate being out of the loop!” Tucker complained.

Sam unpeeled her banana, trying to ignore any innuendos and return to normalcy, as she listened to Tucker’s bellyaching. She took a large bite as her stomach growled. If Skulker hadn’t shown up on the way to school, she probably would have been able to actually grab some breakfast before this whole ordeal. Sure, she had a salad waiting for her, but that wasn’t going to cut it today.

“Damn, look at Manson deep throating that banana like a pro!” Dash quirked. Danny snapped his head to look over at Sam. Oh god. Woah...wait NO!

Without missing a beat, Sam chucked her half eaten banana at Dash, hitting him directly in the face. She smiled proudly as Tucker chuckled next to her.

“Nice shot, Sam!” Tucker held his hand out for a high five, which Sam returned. Dash made an attempt to take a jab at her, but Kwan stopped him. Kwan had to protect both of his “best friends”, after all.

Danny was silent, unable to comprehend his enjoyment of Dash’s misery at Sam’s behalf. That’s my girl, he had thought. Ugh, why? Why did he keep coming back to this? Sam is just a friend. Dash’s dumbass comment just stirred the pot even more. Now Danny had a new fantasy about his best friend to worry about. He looked over at Sam again and blushed before quickly looking away. With the amount of times he’s blushed today, he didn’t think it was possible anymore. And what is she talking about with all these rumors?

Tucker nudged Danny with his elbow and raised an eyebrow at him as Sam caught up with Valerie and raced for the salad bar. “You okay? I thought you’d always dreamt of Sam hitting Dash in the face.” Tucker laughed to himself. “I know I certainly have.”

“Not the only dream of Sam I have…” Danny muttered to himself.

“What?” Tucker looked at his friend again.

“What?” Danny looked back at him confused, grabbing a tray after Tucker.

“What was that now?” Tucker smirked as he grabbed two burgers. Terrific, Tucker had heard him after all.

“Nothing,” Danny said sternly before grabbing some mac n cheese.

“Uh huh.” Tucker’s smirk grew as he piled more food onto his plate.

“It’s nothing!” Danny insisted as he grabbed the rest of his food and followed Tucker to their table.

“Alright, alright. Calm down dude.” Tucker sat down and immediately took a bite of one of his burgers.

“Sorry,” Danny sighed. “Between dumbass number one and dumbass number two over there,” he pointed towards Elliot and Dash, “I’m not thinking straight.”

Tucker nodded and swallowed as Danny took a sip of his drink. Tucker looked over at Sam, pursed his lips, then paused for a moment before saying, “you know, Sam is actually pretty hot, now that I think about it.”

Danny spit his drink out across the table and started coughing. “What?!”

“Oh relax, I’m not gonna steal your girlfriend or anything,” Tucker rolled his eyes as Danny muttered some “she’s not my girlfriend” line. “I’m just saying. I mean, she’s super cool and fun to hang with, she looked great at the freshman dance, and she already has made mini skirt Friday an everyday kind of deal! Like if she just lost the tights or whatever, holy smokes. And like, dude, she has boobs. BOOBS. We’ve been so close this entire time!”

Danny caught his breath and scoffed at Tucker before realizing he kind of had a point. If Danny had learned anything that day, it was that he definitely had conflicting feelings about Sam. It wouldn’t surprise him if other guys started noticing her more as well. Actually, they had, if you counted dumbass number one and dumbass number two.

Danny forced out a small laugh, “Yeah, I guess you’re right. I mean, I kinda…” He trailed off before getting a nod of encouragement from Tucker, silently letting it be known that this conversation was strictly between them and would most likely never be repeated again. “I mean, she’s Sam and she’s so pretty and smart and cool and she hangs out with us, like what the hell? And I ran into her in the hallway earlier after dealing with Johnny 13, and I was bleeding and stuff and her boobs were like, right there in my face while she was trying to help me and with all this dumb sex talk, I had to run to the bathroom before anything happened or became noticeable. I’ve been embarrassed more than enough for one day.”

Tucker let out a loud laugh and slapped Danny on the back. “Damn, dude. I didn’t think you’d ever admit anything.” Danny’s hand immediately went to rub the back of his neck and his face turned crimson for the millionth time that day. “So you ran into Sam, huh?” Tucker wagged his eyebrows suggestively and laughed again when Danny threw a fry at his face. “Don’t worry, dude. I still respect the bro code. I won’t say a word. But like, excusing the fact that she’s like a sister to me for a second, what were they like?”

Danny opened his mouth as he thought of something to say, before jerking forward after Dash slapped him on the back (hard) and took a seat next to him. “You’re talking about Manson, right? She is pretty hot. You’re a lucky man, Fenton.”

Was Dash actually...being nice to him? Because he thought that he and Sam were actually...doing things together. What the fuck was happening today?

“What’s she like? Really?” Dash stole one of Danny’s fries.

“She’s definitely feisty, that’s for sure.” Elliot smirked as he sat across from Danny. This asshole again?!

Danny made tight fists under the table. “Shut the fuck up and leave Sam alone! You guys dated for like a week! That’s nothing!”

“It was enough to cover all of the bases, if you know what I mean. And I’m pretty sure you know what I mean.” Elliot smirked while holding up his phone with the picture on it and leaned back in the chair, nearly falling over as Danny stood quickly from the table, shaking it in the process. He was ready to pounce.

“Shut. The fuck. Up,” Danny growled as he got all up in Elliot’s face. Elliot accepted the challenge.

“No, I don’t think I will. But what I do think will happen is me and Sam again.”

Dash raised an eyebrow at the two boys arguing, “What’s with this? Is Manson like, secretly a sex goddess or something? Maybe I’ll hop on that too.”

Danny’s eyes flashed green for a brief second before almost being knocked over by Tucker, who shoved him out of the way.

“You have a phone?! How did you sneak that in? Can I please have it for five minutes? Please?!” Tucker made a grab for the phone as Elliot held it behind him.

“Depends. What kind of dirt do you have on Danny and Sam?”

“Oh man, where do I start?”

“TUCKER!” Danny glared at his friend, not believing he was actually considering this.

“Oh man, this I gotta hear.” Dash leaned in for a better listen.

“Okay, one timeback in middle school, Danny-” Tucker’s sentence was muffled as Danny slapped his hand over Tucker’s mouth.

“Shut the fuck up!” Danny hissed.

“Oh no, please go on,” Elliot smirked as he waved his phone in the air, “You may just buy yourself 2 minutes.” He tried removing Danny’s hand from Tucker’s mouth.

“Get lost, Elliot.” Danny stood from the table and stared him down again. “Tucker isn’t that desperate.”

“Eh, I think he is,” Dash chimed in. “Foley looks like he’s about to shit a brick.” All three boys looked at Dash, just now remembering he was there.

Across the cafeteria, Sam raised an eyebrow at the crowd around their usual table and looked back at Valerie. “Thanks again for having my back in there. I really owe you one.”

“Nonsense. If anything, take it as repayment for how much you guys have saved my ass from ghosts. And for me trying to kill your boyfriend.”

“He’s not my boyfriend, but thanks.” Sam grabbed a tomato from her salad bowl and popped it in her mouth. “Hey Val, do you want to sit with us?”

Valerie grinned, “Love to, thanks. And he’s not your boyfriend yet. I’ll help get you there.”

Sam laughed. “Okay, sure. We really should hang out more, you know. I need a boost of estrogen every once in a while.”

“Yeah, I’d like that.” Valerie stopped in place for a moment, staring at the guys at their table. Sam followed where Valerie was looking and ran closer to her friends.

“What the fuck is going on?!” Sam yelled as they approached the group of guys who were trying to tackle each other across the table. Danny and Elliot were staring each other down as Elliot held his phone as far back behind him as he could while Tucker, half on top of the table, reached for it. Dash was actually the most civil at the table. They all paused and fell silent as she spoke up. All four of them were staring at her with a weird expression on their faces. “What?” She questioned cautiously, suddenly feeling a bit self conscious. Valerie snickered to herself, taking a wild guess as to what (or who) the boys had been arguing about.

“Uh, nothing.” Danny forced Tucker back into his chair and sat back down next to him. “They were just leaving.” He glared at Elliot.

When the faux goth and the jock refused to move, Sam slammed her tray down on the table. “Get the fuck out of here before I start kicking people. I have my good boots on today.”

Elliot was the first to make a move to leave. “Told ya, feisty.”

Dash stood as well as he looked Sam up and down. Actually not that bad. Fortunately, Sam missed that, but Danny hadn’t. He was practically seeing red as Dash returned to his own table.

“We’ll talk after lunch!” Tucker whispered to Elliot as he passed by on the way back to the other end of the cafeteria.

“What was that all about?” Sam sat down and stabbed her salad with her fork before taking a bite.

“Elliot and Dash are being shitheads and pushing all of Danny’s buttons today,” Tucker announced as he started his second burger.

“Do I wanna know?”

“No.” Danny picked at his food, shutting down that conversation.

Valerie sat down next to Sam and across from Tucker. Noticing his fidgeting, she smirked, “Must be a tough day for you, huh? No technology of any sort?”

Tucker groaned, “It’s killing me! It may actually kill me!”

“Stop being so dramatic, it’s only been a few hours and we’re almost done,” Sam pointed her fork towards Tucker, “You wouldn’t believe all the shit I’ve had to go through today.”

Danny looked up at her, “What happened? Are you okay? Did anyone say anything to you?” He glanced over towards the A Listers’ table, where everyone was passing around Elliot’s stupid phone and making crude noises and gestures towards Danny when they noticed him staring. He flushed again.

“Chill, I’m fine. I’m just apparently the school’s gossip victim for the day.”

“Yeah, Paulina has been pretty ruthless today,” Valerie pointed out as she started her lunch.

“Fuck!” Sam groaned, which gave a certain part of Danny’s anatomy some life again. “I got salad dressing all over my leggings.” She started unlacing her boots.

“W-what are you doing?” Danny squeaked.

“Taking them off. I don’t want to smell like vinaigrette for the rest of the day,” she started peeling off her leggings and with a brief hand from Valerie, she crumbled them into a ball and tossed them into her backpack before she started lacing up her boots again, careful not to lift her legs too high for anyone to accidentally see anything.

Tucker’s eyes widened slightly, as if his conversation with Danny earlier had somehow summoned this to occur. He looked at Danny and raised an eyebrow as if proving his point.

“Don’t even think about it,” Danny warned lowly.

Valerie hid her smirk behind her hand as Danny gripped the table. Danny and Sam were both smitten with each other and both so, so oblivious to the other person’s feelings.

“Anyway, uh...yeah, you’re probably going to hear some gossip, just please know it’s not my fault.” Sam sighed and took another bite of her salad. “Honestly, how I have gone almost 4 years without seriously injuring Paulina is beyond me.”

“I’ll admit, I’m a little shocked too. But you definitely wanted to deck her after she said you were cheating on Fenton with Phantom,” Valerie chuckled as Sam whipped her head towards her and sent her a menacing glare. Valerie just shrugged, knowing damn well what she was doing. Danny and Sam just needed a little nudge, and she was gonna give it to them.

“Oh my god, WHAT?!” Tucker burst out laughing, some of his soda coming out of his nose in the process. Gross.

Danny’s head snapped up as a light pink blush dusted his cheeks. “Uh, w-what? Paulina thinks...you and I...and you and Phantom?”

Sam groaned as she set her empty tupperware container back into her backpack. “Yes, Princess Shit-For-Brains thinks I’m intimate with both sides of you.”

“At the same time?” Danny asked.

“Oh I don’t need to hear this!” Tucker covered his ears.

Sam kept her head down, hair covering her face, as she blushed a deep dark red. “I tried to stop it, I swear.”

“Suuuureeee you did. I bet you hated that implication,” Tucker smirked.

Sam managed to whack him in the back of the head from across the table, nearly giving Danny another pleasantly unfortunate view once again.

“Hey! When I said I wished girls would hit on me, this is not what I meant!” Tucker rubbed the back of his head and readjusted his beret.

Sam smirked. “Be careful what you wish for. Desiree can pop up at any moment.” Tucker’s eyes widened.

“Desiree?” Valerie whispered.

“Genie ghost. Gotta be super careful around her,” Sam replied. Valerie nodded.

“I...uh, okay...well, thanks? For...trying to stop it?” Danny said uncertainly. He had noticed in the past that when he was Phantom, his emotions definitely were stronger and he had always felt more overprotective of Sam. As Phantom, he almost seemed to have less control over his emotions.

“No problem,” Sam muttered quietly.

“Okay, but can you please explain the “Phantom goes commando” thing?” Tucker leaned forward, placing his elbows on the table.

Danny hiccuped, and to his relief, it was his ghost sense. Oh thank god. He stood up, receiving a few looks from the other tables.

“I gotta run, I need to...basically die of embarrassment elsewhere,” Danny said slowly. Nobody seemed to think much of the phrasing. Though Tucker and Sam both immediately caught on.

“I’ll come help you not die,” Sam replied. Anything to get out of this situation. She elbowed Tucker before standing as well. “Come on, we need to help Danny not die.” Tucker waved her off, as Valerie finally understood what was happening.

“You two lovebirds go on ahead,” he told them, “they’ve got this,” he whispered to Valerie. Danny narrowed his eyes at him.

“Don’t go around telling a bunch of our secrets,” Danny spoke with an underlying threatening tone. Tucker nodded.

“Of course. But you are losing your fries,” he informed him, and the teen helped himself to the remaining fries on Danny’s plate. Danny accepted this, and he motioned for Sam to follow him. “Also…” Tucker threw a condom at Danny. Danny shot him a look and let the condom bounce off of his chest and land on the floor. Sam hastily grabbed her backpack, and they both fast-walked out of the cafeteria, earning several stares and eyebrow wags.

Danny groaned, “Ugh, fuck me!” He was sick of this.

“Damn, well now we know who initiates it. Never pictured Fenton to be the dominant one,” Dash laughed. Danny growled and began to turn around before Sam pushed him forward and out of the cafeteria.

“Not now. We probably have Kitty and I assume Johnny to worry about right now.” Once out of the cafeteria, Sam pulled out her wrist ray and put it on. She searched for her pocket knife in her boot, pulling out the Ecto Lipstick Laser by accident. “Ahh!” She dropped it as if it had been on fire and watched it roll down the hallway. Danny raised an eyebrow at her. “Nothing!” She quickly replied as she ran forward to grab the weapon and put it back in her boot. “It’s just the Ecto Lipstick! I swear!” She said a little too loudly. God damn the Fentons for making their inventions look like vibrators. God damn Planned Parenthood for pointing that out in the first place.

“I know?” Danny raised an eyebrow at her as they rounded a corner. “Let’s just get rid of Johnny and Kitty and hope that takes up the rest of the day.”

“Oh, there you two are!” Speak of the fucking devils.

Danny flinched as he turned to see the ghostly pair that had been harassing them both all day. Kitty and Johnny stood together, both grinning excitedly.

“Can’t you guys just go fuck around with each other and stop fucking around with us?” Danny complained. Kitty gave a small scowl.

“We’re trying to help,” Kitty insisted. “I know Johnny already talked to you, but I’m pretty sure he left out some important stuff, like make sure you wash your hands. Clip and file your nails so that they’re not sharp or super long, make sure your hands aren’t freezing. Foreplay is very important.”

Danny wanted to die. He glanced at Sam, who seemed to mirror his emotions. Her face was red, and she wasn’t even looking at the pair, instead digging through her backpack. Likely in search of the Fenton Thermos.

Johnny gave an amused scoff, and he waved his hand. “Nah, it’s not that important,” he replied. Kitty shot him a look that could re-kill Pariah Dark himself. Johnny instantly seemed to realize his mistake.

“Yes. It. Is,” she spoke through gritted teeth.

“I mean, we could overshadow you to show you how it’s done if you want,” Johnny suggested.

Danny and Sam both froze, eyes wide, and turned a brilliant shade of red before spitting out objections.

“NO! Nope! Not necessary!” Danny yelled as he covered his eyes, thinking that would somehow block the mental images in his head. “I can’t...Sam...ughhh. No, gross.”

“Well don’t seem too excited now,” Sam spat sarcastically, rolling her eyes in the process.

“N-no! It’s not that I wouldn’t want...I mean you’re pretty and...I like...I mean, you...what do I mean?” Danny groaned and dragged his hands down his face.

“Oh, dude,” Johnny shook his head, “don’t go there unless you want to be sleeping on the couch.”

“But I-” Danny started until Sam slapped a hand over his mouth.

“Chill out, Romeo. Now is not the time to remove your foot from your mouth.” She removed her hand before Danny licked it. That was something Danny and Tucker did. Ugh, boys.

“Nice touch ditching the tights though. You definitely had boys’ heads turning...even a few girls’.” Kitty tried to get them back on track.

“Uh, what?” Sam looked down at her legs.

“Yeah, even that big blonde sporty kid was saying some pretty graphic things about you,” Johnny added.

“WHAT?!” Danny snapped his head back towards the cafeteria.

“Oh that hit a nerve! Jealousy works, you know. That’s how I keep bringing Kitten back to me,” Johnny grinned.

Kitty rolled her eyes, “Yes, that is exactly what happens.” Her sarcasm was almost as good as Sam’s.

Danny completely ignored the ghosts bickering, focusing his attention on Sam. “Did you hear that? DASH was talking about you like that! I’m gonna kill him…” He trailed off as he made a fist and looked back towards the cafeteria.

“Danny, chill. It’s not a big deal. Dash isn’t into me because I spilled salad dressing on my tights,” Sam rolled her eyes and set her hand on Danny’s shoulder to bring him back down to Earth.

Danny swapped his attention back to her. “Uh, no...look, I mean, you’re very attractive and you’re only wearing a crop top and a mini skirt, it’s an easy step away from imagining you naked.” Sam raised an eyebrow as she put a hand on her hip. “N-not that I am imagining that, and not that I wouldn’t want to! I mean of course I’d want to, it’s just - you’re just….I’m going to stop talking now.” He glanced down at the floor and hoped he could somehow dig himself out of this pit that he just kept digging deeper for himself.

Sam pressed her lips together, both amused and flattered with only a hint of embarrassment, “You think I’m very attractive?”

“And he wants to see you naked,” Johnny added.

Danny’s eyes widened before he snatched the thermos from Sam’s hand, his face burning. “Alright that’s enough of you two!” He promptly sucked them into the thermos, spitefully shaking it a bit before putting it into his locker. “They can sit there the whole weekend for all I care.”

“Do you though? Think I’m attractive?” Sam asked shyly. “I feel like you and Tucker just see me as one of the boys and that’s how everyone sees me. I’m not cute like Paulina and Star.” She saw the panicky look on his face and smiled a bit, “I’m not going to hurt you if you answer this one. You have a free pass.”

Danny looked like he was having an internal debate in his head about whether or not she was telling the truth about letting him off the hook, but when he looked into her eyes, he knew she really wanted an answer. He never would have guessed that Sam was a bit insecure. He gulped before rubbing the back of his neck.

“Uh…” Was he really about to admit this? Out loud? To himself? To her?! He couldn’t help it, she was giving him a free pass. He started at her pale legs and trailed his eyes up her body to her perfect hips, pausing at her breasts for a few half seconds longer than he probably should have, and finally setting on her face. “Yes,” he choked out, his voice husky, “very much so.”

Sam relaxed a bit at his answer, feeling relieved. She smiled softly as she approved of his answer, and then that smile became quite sinister. “And you want to see me naked?”

Danny was a deer in the headlights, opening his mouth to speak before deciding against it. He couldn’t tell if this was still part of the free pass or if she was just fucking with him now. He was mostly sure it was the latter. He grabbed her hand and yanked her down the hallway towards the classroom. “Yeah okay, don’t wanna be late for that sex ed class!”

Sam laughed heartily as he hastily fast walked them from one personal hell to another.

#Tucker is my favorite part of this entire chapter #Danny Phantom #Danny Fenton #Sam Manson #Tucker Foley #fic #stephanie writes sometimes

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pikemoreno · 4 years

Text

if you ever wanna be in love

Chapter II: Coincidences

a/n: the response to what i believe will be the slowest chapter in the whole series was honestly kind of overwhelming? like you guys were into it and it’s only going up from here folks!!

taglist is open if you’d like to be added. sorry if you asked and i missed it or forgot. please just ask again if you aren’t on there and would like to be. :’)

pairing: marcus pike x f!reader

word count: 2.3k

warnings: none, and i don’t expect there to really be any serious ones in upcoming chapters either. this is just fun.

You were really starting to regret your life choices.

Even the beginnings of autumn in Austin were hot as hell. It was only maybe 90 degrees but there was no breeze and the sun was shining ruthlessly on the asphalt, making it feel about 10 degrees hotter. And all of that was then made complete with just a dash of humidity. Basically: you were dying. You probably should’ve considered that before deciding to walk to Rick’s Diner from Wendy’s apartment, but when the pancakes call, you two must answer. And why risk losing your parking spot in the meager guest parking area when you could just walk? It’s only a couple of streets away.

Famous last words. The Austin sun, though setting, still felt like it was frying you to your bones and the air conditioning of the little diner only brought minor relief as you finally reached the stool-lined counter to ask for your to-go order. They didn’t have it quite ready yet due to the dinner rush, but it was unadulterated bliss to hear that you didn’t have to brave the heat again quite yet. A vaguely familiar voice reached your ears as you moved away from the counter.

“Fancy meeting you here, Jewels.”

Pike? From the break room yesterday? You spun around to find none other than the very same. Though his work suit was replaced with a more casual look of a casual well-fit grey shirt and jeans, he was still managing to look more put together than you felt in athletic shirts and a t-shirt. Girls night and the weather called for it, but if you knew you were going to be seeing a coworker...

“Art Squad,” you laughed, leaning against the wall next to him. “What brings you here?”

“Best pancakes in the city. What about you? Coffee?”

“Ha-ha. No, girl’s night with Wendy. Gonna get her mind off of everything with what are absolutely the best pancakes in the city,” you agreed.

“A woman of taste.” His order came up and he took it, taking a moment to talk with the server across the counter. You heard him address him by name.

He must come here a lot.

You couldn’t blame him. It was clean, the service was amazing, the food was great, and it was fun-- with nostalgic decor that didn’t sway towards cheesiness.

Marcus left the counter with his takeout bag, but he didn’t leave with it, as expected. Instead he came back to stand beside you.

“Maybe I should get some for Adrian too. These pancakes are magical,” he commented, continuing your previous conversation.

“Exactly.”

“I just wish I could do more for him. Coffee and pancakes aren’t exactly a permanent fix.”

“Agreed. I’m on the lookout for a rebound for Wendy. Maybe you should consider it too. Not a permanent fix but-- better.”

It hit you all at once.

Two single people recently in need of a rebound that work in the same building?

That couldn’t be coincidence.

But, no, that was a crazy idea. There was nothing that actually connected them. Did they have anything in common other than getting their hearts ripped out and working for the FBI? Doubtful. Was that enough for a stable relationship? God, no. Was that enough to bring them together long enough for a hook-up and getting them over their exes?

Maybe.

Your name being called interrupted your thoughts and, pancakes in hand, you and Marcus walked back out into the Austin heat. You had no idea how he was managing in jeans, though you guessed it helped that he was probably smart enough to drive with the protection of A/C.

“Well, see you around,” you nodded to him, ignoring the nagging in the back of your head to tell him about your scheme. It was silly. You turned left to walk towards Wendy’s place.

“Where are you going?” he calls after you; you turn. “Did you not--?” he gestures to the parking lot on his right.

“Walked here.”

“Do you like causing yourself pain?”

“Sometimes.” He gave you a look. “I’m kidding. It’s not that bad.”

“Yeah, right. Let me drive you.” You considered a moment. There wasn’t any harm in accepting the ride, you guessed, though you didn’t actually know him. He could actually be a murderer who’s just trying to get you to a secondary location. You’d seen John Mulaney. You knew what that meant.

But maybe it was worth a try for the pancakes.

Just for the pancakes-- for their safety.

“Sure, why not.”

This couldn’t be coincidence either. Time to scheme.

“So, about Adrian,” you began. The look he gave you was quizzical. “How old is he?”

“33?”

“Would he be interested in a 32 year old beautiful, badass goddess of an FBI Supervisory Special Agent?” He raises an eyebrow as you get in his car.

“Is that Wendy?”

“Yes. Turn left up here.” He did.

“I know what you’re thinking. No, we’re not going to--”

“But think about it!”

“I am. Meddling? That always works.” His tone was drowning in sarcasm.

“Sure it does. Adrian’s work is suffering, right? Driving you crazy? Wendy’s driving me crazy. They belong together.”

“I don’t think that’s a great quality to base a relationship off of.”

“Oh, this is her building here.” He pulled over and you continued, unbuckling your seatbelt “We’ll cross that bridge when we get there. Surely we can get them together long enough to at least get them off our backs.”

“Absolutely not. I’m not getting involved in Adrian’s love life.”

“Alright, fine. If you never see me again. Wendy finally killed me.” He rolled his eyes. “Thanks for the ride, Art Squad.”

“See you around, Jewels.”

“Don’t be so sure!” you called back as you walked up to the front of Wendy’s apartment.

Arriving back to Wendy’s living room had her asking you how you got back so soon as she gratefully took out her takeout container of pancakes.

“Hitched a ride,” you shrugged in reply, sitting cross-legged on the other end of her couch.

“Oh? With who?” There were approximately eight extra “O’s” attached at the end of the question.

“A guy from work.”

“From work, hmm?” She wiggled her eyebrows.

“Not like that.”

“Humor me. Someone from our team?”

“Oh, no. Definitely not. Art Squad.” Wendy widened her eyes, tilting her head at you. “It’s nothing Wendy, honestly.”

“How do you know him?” But the question didn’t come out casually. This was an interrogation. You sighed.

“I don’t, really,” you diverted the conversation digging into your take-out container. “And why are you interrogating me, hmm? I thought we were supposed to be laughing at reality shows and stuffing our faces in pancakes here and forgetting all about this kind of shit.”

“No no no. When my long-time single work friend mentions a secret guy, I ask questions.”

“Hey, I just went on a date two weeks ago! Don’t give me any of that always single crap. I get around.”

“Yeah, you went on one date. And then you came back an hour later saying he was boring and you never contacted him again. And when was the last time before that?”

“Fine, fine. I get it. But this isn’t some ‘secret guy,’” you put down your fork just to give the phrase some emphatic air quotes. “I just ran into him yesterday at the office and then today at Rick’s. That’s it.”

“For now,” she whispered devilishly. You pointed your fork at her, feigning a threat.

“I do not need a man, Wendy Harrod. I have work and I have you.”

“I know you don’t. I just wanna see you happy.” You crossed your arms.

“I am happy. Hey, this night is supposed to be about you and your man troubles. Turn on 90 Day Fiance. Stop talking about me.”

You were telling the truth. Most of it. You felt alright by yourself. You did have work, though it was a dead-end until you managed to move out of the Austin field office. It had been you and Wendy up for a promotion a couple years ago and she received it. You knew the likelihood of her leaving before retirement was minuscule, which left you stuck in your current position until your own retirement. Unless you left. Not an option. You couldn’t leave Wendy scrambling for someone to replace you. It wasn’t an ideal situation, but you had it. It was yours. And you… Liked it well enough.

It was fine. What more could you want?

***

Monday mornings were hard on anyone: the start of another week, the stack of work that Friday-you left for Monday-you staring you in the face. For Marcus it brought the wondering if this could be the week that Adrian was back to himself.

It took all of ten minutes in the office to see that wouldn’t be the case.

Adrian’s pile of work had hardly decreased in height from the last time Marcus saw it on Friday morning. He watched for a moment to see how it was going. Adrian’s pen moved slowly across the page as he followed the words printed on it, occasionally making a mark or circling a section. He was working, but not to his best. It was written on his face and in his body language: hunched over at his desk, his chin resting resting heavily in the hand that wasn’t making lethargic movements over the paper. It just wasn’t the spunky Adrian that loved his job and his co-workers. He was always the hardest worker, and on the rare occasions that Adrian wasn’t working it was because he was too caught up in being a social butterfly. This side of him was frighteningly unprecedented.

“How’re you doing Adrian?” Marcus finally spoke.

Adrian made a noncommittal noise in response, his gaze fixated entirely somewhere above the page, but not quite on him.

“That good, huh?”

Another grunt.

Marcus pulled a rolling chair up to the other side of Adrian’s desk, facing him, studying him. He thought of your proposition from days before. It was kind of a crazy idea. But it might just be crazy enough to work. It wouldn’t be a permanent fix but... Better. Just as you’d said. He was getting about that desperate. Three weeks without Adrian was bad enough for team morale. Another week of this? Maybe more? The very walls of the sixth floor would be turning dull and grey. He still didn’t love the idea, but he hadn’t exactly come up with anything better. Could he bring it up to Adrian? Was it better if they didn’t know they were being set up? He started small.

“Adrian, have you considered maybe, I don’t know, trying to date again soon? Just to get your mind off of… That.”

Adrian shrugged, “Maybe. I’d have to find someone I was interested in. But I just don't think I'll find that anytime soon. I’ll just keep comparing them to Sam.”

Marcus hummed in thought, watching the defeat on Adrian’s face. “Well, I’ll keep my eye out,” he promised loosely as he rolled the rolling chair back away from the desk.

He had to find you.

He quickly announced he was taking a long lunch and headed straight to the elevator, thankful no one followed him to see him go up to the seventh floor instead of down to the first. He poked around offices and desks, ignoring the questioning glances, looking for you or any sign of where your workspace might be. He found you in the seventh floor breakroom, starting into what looked like an extremely mediocre lunch.

He sat directly across from you and watched as you slowly looked up to find the source of the noise, suddenly feeling that he might’ve overstepped and you might not want to disturbed. That was quickly replaced by the odd surge of pride when you looked relieved to see him. You smiled at him and called him Art Squad.

“What brings you to the seventh floor? We still don’t have any coffee,” you huffed.

“I’m in.”

“I’m sorry?”

“I’m in. Let’s set them up.” Your expression was nothing short of cocky as you leaned back in your chair.

“Oh? Coming crawling back so soon? Adrian getting the best of you?”

“Yeah, yeah. Rub it in. So what do we do?”

“Well,” you laid down your fork, “The way I see it. We shouldn’t tell them. They’re having a tough time and feeling like they’re only getting a date from their friends’ pity party would make it worse. They need this to feel natural, like it was their idea and they’re recovering. It’ll give them confidence.”

“So we... What?”

“I don’t know! I didn’t think I’d get this far.” He rolled his eyes.

“You don’t even have a plan and you were trying to convince me to help you?”

“Just let me think about it, alright?”

“Alright. Let’s drive and think. Up for a long lunch break?”

“I guess? But I have,” you looked to your sad little lunch in front of you. When you met his eyes again, he simply raised an eyebrow.

You’re really gonna eat that?

“Rick’s?”

“Rick’s.”

forever taglist: @acomplicatedprofession @hdlynn @makaela27 @space-floozy @catfishingmorales @ithinkhesgaybutwesavedmufasa @princessbatears @synystersilenceinblacknwhite @findhimfives

series taglist: @whiskeyslasso @ahopelessromanticwritersworld @dindjarindiaries @absurdthirst @roxypeanut @fioccodineveautunnale

#bri writes #iyewbil #marcus pike x reader

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welllpthisishappening · 3 years

Text

Welllp These Are Books: the March 2021 Edition

There aren’t even any pictures! Except in that one book where there were pictures! It was weird! This was a weird book month! Back at it again with thoughts and opinions about a whole mess of books that no one explicitly asked for, but I’ve got lots of thoughts and opinions and they only count if I share them on the internet. Seriously, someone let me go to a baseball game soon. Obligatory warning for spoilers and vaguely unhinged rants under the cut. As always, feel free to come tell me what else I should be reading at literally any time ever.

Best Book of the Month Honors Goes to This Book, Even Though They Called It Halftime at a Hockey Game. A Hockey Game!

The Dating Plan by Sara Desai

Daisy Patel is a software engineer who understands lists and logic better than bosses and boyfriends. With her life all planned out, and no interest in love, the one thing she can't give her family is the marriage they expect. Left with few options, she asks her childhood crush to be her decoy fiancé. Liam Murphy is a venture capitalist with something to prove. When he learns that his inheritance is contingent on being married, he realizes his best friend's little sister has the perfect solution to his problem. A marriage of convenience will get Daisy's matchmaking relatives off her back and fulfill the terms of his late grandfather's will. If only he hadn’t broken her tender teenage heart nine years ago… Sparks fly when Daisy and Liam go on a series of dates to legitimize their fake relationship. Too late, they realize that very little is convenient about their arrangement. History and chemistry aren't about to follow the rules of this engagement.

— Ok, it’s important to know that I really did love this book. It hit all my trope-wants. Childhood friends, incredibly stupid misunderstandings, pining, seriously God the pining, fake engagement, BANTER. It was all going great. I was occasionally swooning. They kept making out! And then! THEN. They went to a hockey game. On a date. A fake date. Cool, cool, cool. All tropes, all the time right? Not so fast, internet! Because these self-proclaimed Sharks SUPER FANS referred to intermission as “halftime was coming up.” Halftime! At a hockey game! That’s—that’s not how hockey works! If this hadn’t been “traditionally” published, I probably could have let it slide. But that was not the case. This was a “real” book with, I can only assume, real editors. All of whom saw the words halftime and hockey near each other and we’re like YEAH, PRINT THAT SHIT. I read that at nearly one in the morning and seriously considered waking Justin up to be like CAN YOU BELIEVE THIS IS IN A REAL BOOK? Anyway, it was still real cute. Everyone lived happily ever after. It made want to eat samosas.

This Book Had Pictures, It Was Weird

Clean Sweep by Ilona Andrews

On the outside, Dina Demille is the epitome of normal. She runs a quaint Victorian Bed and Breakfast in a small Texas town, owns a Shih Tzu named Beast, and is a perfect neighbor, whose biggest problem should be what to serve her guests for breakfast. But Dina is...different: Her broom is a deadly weapon; her Inn is magic and thinks for itself. Meant to be a lodging for otherworldly visitors, the only permanent guest is a retired Galactic aristocrat who can’t leave the grounds because she’s responsible for the deaths of millions and someone might shoot her on sight. Under the circumstances, "normal" is a bit of a stretch for Dina.

And now, something with wicked claws and deepwater teeth has begun to hunt at night...Feeling responsible for her neighbors, Dina decides to get involved. Before long, she has to juggle dealing with the annoyingly attractive, ex-military, new neighbor, Sean Evans—an alpha-strain werewolf—and the equally arresting cosmic vampire soldier, Arland, while trying to keep her inn and its guests safe. But the enemy she’s facing is unlike anything she’s ever encountered before. It’s smart, vicious, and lethal, and putting herself between this creature and her neighbors might just cost her everything.

— So, Ilona Andrews is a name that keeps coming up because when I borrow a book from the library I have to go through Kindle and Amazon is like...here are some other absurd fantasy romances you’d enjoy. Also, one of her other series had been recc’ed to me. Only problem? The first book in that series is the only book in that series not available at my library. So, I was like, ok, I’ll start this one instead. It was...weird. Honestly, it felt like I’d been dropped in the middle of the story and the narrator was like, well why don’t you already know what’s going on? In theory the world building was cool. (I was not expecting alien werewolves, lemme tell you that!) But also it all felt very rushed and the end just sorta happened.

In Which I Continue to Love “Same Verse” Books & No One Else Had Sex in the Port Jeff High School Dugout. For Which I Was Grateful

Love Her or Lose Her by Tessa Bailey

Rosie and Dominic Vega are the perfect couple: high school sweethearts, best friends, madly in love. Well, they used to be anyway. Now Rosie’s lucky to get a caveman grunt from the ex-soldier every time she walks in the door. Dom is faithful and a great provider, but the man she fell in love with ten years ago is nowhere to be found. When her girlfriends encourage Rosie to demand more out of life and pursue her dream of opening a restaurant, she decides to demand more out of love, too. Three words: marriage boot camp.

Never in a million years did Rosie believe her stoic, too-manly-to-emote husband would actually agree to relationship rehab with a weed-smoking hippie. Dom talking about feelings? Sitting on pillows? Communing with nature? Learning love languages? Nope. But to her surprise, he’s all in, and it forces her to admit her own role in their cracked foundation. As they complete one ridiculous—yet surprisingly helpful—assignment after another, their remodeled relationship gets stronger than ever. Except just as they’re getting back on track, Rosie discovers Dom has a secret... and it could demolish everything.

— Listen, one of my absolutely favorite tropes that I do not think gets enough love in the world is COMMITTED LONG-LASTING RELATIONSHIPS. And, like, ok, sure the premise of this was that they were separating in that long-lasting relationship. But no one really believed that, did they? Rosie and Dominic were real cute and their banter was good and I wasn’t totally skeeved out when they literally fucked on the kitchen floor. So, I think that’s saying something. Also, also! I seriously appreciated the realism of this book because no one on Long Island would ever call Manhattan Manhattan. It’s the city. Every other borough gets a name, but Manhattan is just the city and I nearly cheered when they said that. But also, no one’s taking a cab from Port Jeff to the Meatpacking District. You know what that would cost? God.

Tools of Engagement by Tessa Bailey

Hair, makeup, clothing, decor... everything in Bethany Castle's world is organized, planned, and styled to perfection. Which is why the homes she designs for her family's real estate business are the most coveted in town. The only thing not perfect? Her track record with men. She's on a dating hiatus and after helping her friends achieve their dreams, Bethany finally has time to focus on her own: flip a house, from framework to furnishings, all by herself. Except her older brother runs the company and refuses to take her seriously.

When a television producer gets wind of the Castle sibling rivalry, they’re invited on Flip Off, a competition to see who can do the best renovation. Bethany wants bragging rights, but she needs a crew and the only member of her brother's construction team willing to jump ship is Wes Daniels, the new guy in town. His Texas drawl and handsome face got under Bethany's skin on day one, and the last thing she needs is some cocky young cowboy in her way.

As the race to renovate heats up, Wes and Bethany are forced into close quarters, trading barbs and biting banter as they remodel the ugliest house on the block. It's a labor of love, hate, and everything in between, and soon sparks are flying. But Bethany's perfectly structured life is one kiss away from going up in smoke and she knows falling for a guy like Wes would be a flipping disaster.

— It should first be noted that in the three books of this series, I could not and cannot understand why Bethany’s brother was such a monumental dick. He was just...he was a dick. His marriage was awful. How long was his wife pregnant without him knowing???? I digress. This continued to be cute, Bethany was a legit heroine as far as those rom-com things go, Wes was very Texas and that got a little over the top, but they had sex in a bed like normal people so that helped. Oh, except that one time on the construction site. Whatever, this book was cute. This whole series was cute, really, and I was a big fan of the happy little wrap-everything-up with a bow ending.

Romance That Happens In Point Two Seconds Is...Unbelievable

Too Hot to Handle by Tessa Bailey

The road trip was definitely a bad idea. Having already flambéed her culinary career beyond recognition, Rita Clarkson is now stranded in God-Knows-Where, New Mexico, with a busted-ass car and her three temperamental siblings, who she hasn't seen in years. When rescue shows up---six-feet-plus of hot, charming sex on a motorcycle---Rita's pretty certain she's gone from the frying pan right into the fire . . . Jasper Ellis has a bad boy reputation in this town, and he loathes it. The moment he sees Rita, though, Jasper knows he's about to be sorely tempted. There's something real between them. Something raw. And Jasper has only a few days to show Rita that he isn't just for tonight---he's forever.

— For as much as I loved the Port Jeff series by my new pal Tessa, this one was...oof. Too much, guys. Too much. Fucking in trucks. Fucking in back offices. The whole book lasted, like, three days. And keep in mind this is coming from someone who has written like two million words about Killian Jones, self-loathing champ 250 years running, but Jasper’s self-loathing was a little over the top. Like, let’s not objectify dudes, but also...I don’t know guys. Maybe the other books in the series are better? I was mostly just annoyed by Rita.

What the Hell Happened at the End of This Book?? Seriously, I Have No Idea

The Queen’s Assassin by Melissa de la Cruz

Caledon Holt is the kingdom's deadliest weapon. No one alive can best him in speed, strength, or brains, which is why he's the Hearthstone Guild's most dangerous member. Cal is also the Queen's Assassin, bound to her by magic and unable to leave her service until the task she's set for him is fulfilled. Shadow of the Honey Glade has been training all her life to join the Guild, hoping that one day she'll become an assassin as feared and revered as Cal. But Shadow's mother and aunts expect her to serve the crown as a lady of the Renovian Court. When a surprise attack brings Shadow and Cal together, they're forced to team up as assassin and apprentice. Even though Shadow's life belongs to the court and Cal's belongs to the queen, they cannot deny their attraction to each other. But now, with war on the horizon and true love at risk, Shadow and Cal will uncover a shocking web of lies that will change their paths forever.

—WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED AT THE END OF THIS BOOK??? I figured out the so-called twist like...two chapters in. Fine, ok, whatever. It’s YA, this is not rocket science and I was interested enough in Cale and Shadow to see how it all played out. Only it didn’t really play out! Because the whole end was just this like four chapter retcon of basically EVERYTHING ELSE THAT HAPPENED and I genuinely could not believe it was happening. It didn’t make sense?!? Like with the plot? Also, spoiler, good thing Shadow and the other king haven’t consummated their marriage yet since she and Cale totally fucked after her wedding? What is YA? Why is Amazon telling me this is a Teacher’s Pick? Why hasn’t my hold come through on the sequel yet so I know what happens next?

Low-Stakes Romance Was Real Boring and All The People Were Boring In It

The Ten Rules for Faking It by Sophie Sullivan

As birthdays go, this year’s for radio producer Everly Dean hit rock-bottom. Worse than the “tonsillectomy birthday.” Worse than the birthday her parents decided to split (the first time). But catching your boyfriend cheating on you with his assistant? Even clichés sting. But this is Everly’s year! She won’t let her anxiety hold her back. She’ll pitch her podcast idea to her boss. There’s just one problem. Her boss, Chris, is very cute. (Of course). Also, he's extremely distant (which means he hates her, right? Or is that the anxiety talking)? And, Stacey the DJ didn’t mute the mic during Everly’s rant about Simon the Snake (syn: Cheating Ex). That’s three problems. Suddenly, people are lining up to date her, Bachelorette-style, fans are voting (Reminder: never leave house again), and her interest in Chris might be a two-way street. It’s a lot for a woman who could gold medal in people-avoidance. She’s going to have to fake it ‘till she makes it to get through all of this. Perhaps she’ll make a list: The Ten Rules for Faking It.

— I am a broken record. Shouting. From the highest hilltop. Just because you think someone is cute when you’re technically not supposed to be dating them does not mean you get to be anything less than nice around them! It’s not cute! And part two, which often goes with part one: rom com dudes have GOT to stop lying or hiding or otherwise avoiding telling people who they really are. It’s a convoluted, passably lazy way of writing and dropping a third-act bomb on the story. Don’t do it. Stop doing it. We’ve moved past the need for hidden identities. Unless he’s, like, a spy or something. Um...this was a weird book. I know Everly had anxiety and that became a PLOT POINT, patent pending, but she was also not super relatable? Which is crazy considering my very real, rather undiagnosed anxiety. Chris was boring. The whole plot, as this title suggests, was very low stakes and no one actually seemed to remember that their jobs were ever on the line? Did Everly and Chris have a conversation before they decided they liked each other? Who can say, really.

Shipped by Angie Hockman

Between taking night classes for her MBA and her demanding day job at a cruise line, marketing manager Henley Evans barely has time for herself, let alone family, friends, or dating. But when she’s shortlisted for the promotion of her dreams, all her sacrifices finally seem worth it. The only problem? Graeme Crawford-Collins, the remote social media manager and the bane of her existence, is also up for the position. Although they’ve never met in person, their epic email battles are the stuff of office legend. Their boss tasks each of them with drafting a proposal on how to boost bookings in the Galápagos—best proposal wins the promotion. There’s just one catch: they have to go on a company cruise to the Galápagos Islands...together. But when the two meet on the ship, Henley is shocked to discover that the real Graeme is nothing like she imagined. As they explore the Islands together, she soon finds the line between loathing and liking thinner than a postcard. With her career dreams in her sights and a growing attraction to the competition, Henley begins questioning her life choices. Because what’s the point of working all the time if you never actually live?

— YOU NEED TO HAVE A CONVERSATION WITH SOMEONE TO DECIDE YOU LIKE THEM. AUTHORS REALLY REALLY NEED TO LEARN HOW TO BUILD ROMANTIC RELATIONSHIPS. IF THEY ONLY LIKE EACH OTHER BECAUSE THEY KISS WELL IT’S NOT A GOOD RELATIONSHIP. AND THIS IS COMING FROM ME. Back at it again with the annoying so-called heroine who was just...occasionally real mean to Graem for no reason at all? Also her name was Henley. Which is not a great reason to dislike her, but here we are.

Apparently I Read These Books Out Of Order. Who Knew?

Pride, Prejudice and Other Flavors by Sonali Dev

It is a truth universally acknowledged that only in an overachieving Indian American family can a genius daughter be considered a black sheep.

Dr. Trisha Raje is San Francisco’s most acclaimed neurosurgeon. But that’s not enough for the Rajes, her influential immigrant family who’s achieved power by making its own non-negotiable rules:

· Never trust an outsider

· Never do anything to jeopardize your brother’s political aspirations

· And never, ever, defy your family

Trisha is guilty of breaking all three rules. But now she has a chance to redeem herself. So long as she doesn’t repeat old mistakes.

Up-and-coming chef DJ Caine has known people like Trisha before, people who judge him by his rough beginnings and place pedigree above character. He needs the lucrative job the Rajes offer, but he values his pride too much to indulge Trisha’s arrogance. And then he discovers that she’s the only surgeon who can save his sister’s life.

As the two clash, their assumptions crumble like the spun sugar on one of DJ’s stunning desserts. But before a future can be savored there’s a past to be reckoned with...

A family trying to build home in a new land.

A man who has never felt at home anywhere.

And a choice to be made between the two.

— Surprise, apparently this was the first book in the series. I did not know. It didn’t affect my enjoyment of the Persuasion version in this same ‘verse, which is also strange because I liked the Persuasion one way better. There was a lot of medical in this. And not super uplifting medical, either. This was like...oh the Jane character (I guess???) has cancer and either she’s going to go blind after having a surgery (also she was an artist, so you see how this was a problem) or she’s just going to decide to die. Wait, what? That came out of left field, really. Also DJ and Trisha were not nice to each other. Like, I know this is Pride and Prejudice so there has to be some of that at the start, but it wasn’t like Trisha ever really went through the Darcy-required time at Pemberly. She just decided she liked DJ and told him and it was as awkward as Jane Austen intended it, but then we got more medical and everything was cool. It felt very rushed and shoehorned into a modern setting and the Persuasion one was better. You can’t have Darcy’s growth without the Pemberly stuff. You just can’t.

In Which I Didn’t Like a Nickname??? Is the World Ending??

Crazy Stupid Bromance by Lyssa Kay Adams

Alexis Carlisle and her cat café, ToeBeans, have shot to fame after she came forward as a victim of a celebrity chef’s sexual harassment. When a new customer approaches to confide in her, the last thing Alexis expects is for the woman to claim they’re sisters. Unsure what to do, Alexis turns to the only man she trusts—her best friend, Noah Logan. Computer genius Noah left his rebellious teenage hacker past behind to become a computer security expert. Now he only uses his old skills for the right cause. But Noah’s got a secret: He’s madly in love with Alexis. When she asks for his help, he wonders if the timing will ever be right to confess his crush. Noah’s pals in The Bromance Book Club are more than willing to share their beloved “manuals” to help him go from bud to boyfriend. But he must decide if telling the truth is worth risking the best friendship he’s ever had.

— If Noah was going to call her Lexa, then her name should have been Alexa and not Alexis. That’s it and that’s all. Also, the story was n u t s. Estranged dads and kidney failure and they got together so fast in this book. Which usually is cool by me, but I really could not get over the nickname and the estranged family was mean to Alexis. Lexa. HER NAME SHOULD HAVE BEEN ALEXA, IT DOESN’T MAKE SENSE. Also Noah was a former hacker? The estranged family accused him corporate espionage or something? A lot happened in this book, guys. Her name should have been Alexa.

Dumb Brother Was Dumb™ Everyone Else Was Real Cute

The Off Limits Rule by Sarah Adams

I have found rock bottom. It's here, moving in with my older brother because I'm too broke to afford to live on my own. It's okay though, because we've always been close and I think I'm going to have fun living with him again.   That is until I meet Cooper...   Turns out, my brother has very strong opinions on the idea of me dating his best friend and is dead set against it. According to him, Cooper is everything I should stay away from: flirtatious, adventurous, non-committal, and freaking hot. (I added that last part because I feel like you need the whole picture.) My brother is right--I should stay away from Cooper James and his pretty blue eyes. He's the opposite of what I need right now.   Nah--who am I kidding? I'm going for it.

— This was cute, mostly mindless fluff. Hit some trope high points, including, obviously, best friends sister. Only the brother in question was a Neanderthal and I really thought people were going to make out more while said brother was on his business trip. I got it for free off Amazon. Which I think should explain a lot. Like, story-wise. Sorry, free Amazon books. Don’t be insulted.

Prose, Prose, Prose, Please Someone Have a Conversation

Trick by Natalia Jaster

In the Kingdom of Spring, Poet is renowned. He's young and pretty, a lover of men and women. He performs for the court, kisses like a scoundrel, and mocks with a silver tongue. Yet allow him this: It's only the most cunning and manipulative soul who can play the fool. For beyond the castle walls, Poet guards a secret. One the Crown would shackle him for. One that he'll risk everything to protect. Alas, it will take more than clever words to deceive Princess Briar. Convinced that he's juggling lies as well as verse, this righteous nuisance of a girl is determined to expose him. But not all falsehoods are fiendish. Poet's secret is delicate, binding the jester and princess in an unlikely alliance—and kindling a breathless attraction, as alluring as it is forbidden.

— The purplest of prose. Mauve prose. Royal purple prose. Lavender prose. There was so much writing here. So much. Too much, some might say. I say. Actually. If we want to get specific. And that was a shame, really, because when Briar and Poet actually had a conversation, they were interesting to read about. Also, the world building here? Yeeeesh. The so-called, wait for it, FOOL TRADE played a prominent role and that was...super cringe. Super Cringe. That being said, I asked Justin what I should read next and he thought it was funny that a book was just called...

Dare by Natalia Jaster

In the Kingdom of Summer, they say she's wild. Locked in a cage by the sea, Flare dreams of escape. She dreams of a lost world, known only in legends. The island is calling to her. And she won't let anyone keep her from it. Especially not him. They say he's cruel. Jeryn has crossed the ocean for the Trade, to bargain for those fierce, imprisoned creatures that make his skin crawl. By law, they're subjects meant for experimentation. And easy to despise. One girl in particular. But on the cusp of transport, the tide rages. That hidden island awaits. Stranded, the prince and prisoner must fight to survive. In a mysterious rainforest, they must band together...if they don't slay one another first. Or become something more to each other. Something just as dangerous.

— This was Justin’s fault. He could not believe this book was just called Dare. It should have been called “We’re going to weirdly force what is basically slavery into this story and then a prince is going to fall in love with an escaped slave and we’re also going to call that ROMANCE.” y i k e s. Remember that one story that took place over three days? This was the complete opposite. Years! They were shipwrecked for years! They got saved, spoilers, the DAY they started having sex. What are the odds, right?? And then MORE YEARS passed. Multiple years! Five years! They couldn’t actually be together because of that aforementioned slave trade. What the shit, man? Natalia, ya gotta be kidding me with this. The internet claimed Trick was good and a solid follow to reading ACOTAR and that there was this whole verse and it was also good. The internet was wrong.

Nothing Happened, Everything Happened, I...Hated It

Graceling by Kristin Cashore

Kristin Cashore’s bestselling, award-winning fantasy Graceling tells the story of the vulnerable-yet-strong Katsa, a smart, beautiful teenager who lives in a world where selected people are given a Grace, a special talent that can be anything from dancing to swimming. Katsa’s is killing. As the king’s niece, she is forced to use her extreme skills as his thug. Along the way, Katsa must learn to decipher the true nature of her Grace… and how to put it to good use. A thrilling, action-packed fantasy adventure (and steamy romance!) that will resonate deeply with adolescents trying to find their way in the world.

— I can’t believe this was a book. Katsa was so annoying! Like, listen, I know her life was sad. And she was a pawn being used against her will. Blah, blah, blah. Whatever. The tone of the whole book was so strangely formal and Poe was strangely in love with Katsa? Who obviously didn’t want to get married because she was WOMAN HEAR ME ROAR. Or kill people, as the case may be. Only she wanted to make out with Poe? Only ONLY they didn’t even really get together at the end? I could not believe the end of this book. I nearly threw my Kindle across the room. Once again, no apologies for spoilers because do not read this book, but HE WAS BLIND? Katsa had to leave him behind to save his cousin and he just ENDED UP BEING BLIND? AND THEY NEVER GOT TOGETHER REALLY?? What the fuck? Seriously. Steamy romance, my ass. Nothing happened. The villain got defeated in point two seconds. There are other books in this universe? No, thanks.

#book recommendations #book rec #fantasy recommendations #book recs #laura reads books #this was longer than i realized it was going to be #documentation of a very weird book month #but we're almost back on track now because i am LOVING a darker shade of magic #welllp these are books

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arukou-arukou · 4 years

Text

A Non-zero Chance

I jumbled the timeline as I was writing this. Just go with it, okay? For @stevetonygames prompt Fluff: Sparring, for team angst. Also adding fic non-linear and tropes: soulmates. Angst with a hopeful ending. Mentions of sex acts. Canon typical violence. There is a read more line after the first section.

Many many months after that faithful day in Sibera, Tony returned to the scene of the crime. The site was untouched. He hadn’t told Ross about it, and apparently T’Challa had decided well enough was better left alone. The holes they’d put into the bunker of the facility had completely covered over in frost and ice, and Tony had to wonder how Zemo had even dug the little hillock out in the first place. Though there had been a snowcat parked outside when they all first arrived. Without any care, though, it had once again faded into the arctic surroundings. Only someone who knew what they were looking for would find it.

Tony broke in through the holes rather than the front door. He wasn’t really in a mood for digging, and as satisfying as it might be to melt snow with an overloaded repulsor, this mission was also supposed to be stealth and secretive, and he didn’t really need Ross any further up his ass.

Inside, the evidence of their fight wasn’t as big or horrifying as he remembered. There were some structures that had toppled, and a few spots where he’d scorched cement with a repulsor, but it didn’t look nearly as bad as he remembered it being. The Avengers had certainly done worse elsewhere. Tony ran his hand over a shield-shaped crack in the wall.

—

“This is ridiculous, Cap, we need to know how to fight together, not fight each other.”

Steve smiles back over his shoulder. His ridiculously broad shoulder. “After Wanda mind-whammied us, I’m not taking any chances. We should all know how to incapacitate each other just as a precaution.”

“Only incapacitate, Steve? Not maim?”

Steve chuckles and starts strapping on boxing tape. “No maiming on the docket today. Maybe next Tuesday.”

—

Tony followed their trail of destruction back into the heart of the bunker, where the super soldiers still rested suspended, illuminated in sickly yellow. There was the fucking TV, right there. The thing that had ruined it all. Tony stared down at it, wondering where the tape reel itself was located. Probably back in that room Zemo had been hiding in. The bulletproof one. Somewhere in the hallways, Tony could hear water dripping. Impressive, really, given the permafrost all around. He would’ve thought the systems had frozen over long ago. Near his foot, there was a gun, the semi-automatic Barnes had been carrying. It was useless now, its clip and firing mechanisms slagged by his repulsors. He picked it up all the same and aimed it at the glass where Zemo had hidden. The suit’s fingers were too thick to fit over the trigger—what was left of it anyway—so Tony just imagined how satisfying it would be to fill that glass full of shrapnel, to watch Zemo crumple to the ground.

—

“Why are you even training me, Rogers? I’m retired. Aren’t you supposed to be looking after the rookies?”

“Just because you’re retired, Tony, doesn’t mean trouble won’t come looking for you. You’re a pretty attractive target.”

“Why yes. Yes, I am. Thank you for noticing.”

Steve punches his bicep gently before offering a bottle of water. Tony takes it, squirting some into his mouth before moving on to his sweat-drenched hair. On Steve’s left wrist, he catches sight of the red band that hides Steve’s words. It would be rude to ask. Totally taboo. But Tony can’t stop himself.

—

Tony managed to jimmy his way into the control room, and there he found the VCR, still loaded with the incriminating tape. If he were smart, he would just rip the thing apart, burn the tape and shatter the shell. And Tony was smart. Just not smart in the right ways. He fired up the power to the TV, rewound the tape, and then hit play again. He’d rewound too far. Barnes was in his cryo tube. Some slimy scientists were hauling him out, shoving him into some horrifying chair, pushing down the nodes, saying the words.

No. Tony didn’t want this. He didn’t want to feel sympathy for Barnes. He wanted to let his rage fester and corrode him until he didn’t care anymore. All caring had ever gotten him was betrayal.

—

“Do you know who they belong to?” Tony asks, looking up defiantly, refusing to be sheepish about his lack of willpower. Steve glances down at his band before looking up again.

“Yeah. Yeah, I do.” He looks wistful and boyish, sweet and beautiful. Tony wants to kiss away the sorrow he sees in that face.

“Who?”

“Doesn’t matter. He’s dead now.”

“Oh.” Tony touches his own band, thinking of the words beneath. He’s my friend. The most significant thing anyone will ever say to him. The thing that, if the romantics would have him believe it, points him toward his soulmate. He’s never really gone in for that, though. His parents had had each other’s words, and their marriage was anything but blissful and romantic.

No. Tony’s got a different theory about the words.

—

There. Tony spotted it before even knowing he was looking for it. On Barnes’ collarbone. Had fate known he would lose the arm? It was unusual for words to be somewhere else on the body. Non-dominant wrist. That was the norm. The tap quality was shit and Tony couldn’t enhance it without bringing the tape back to Fry. And like hell he was bringing the tape home. Were the files somewhere? Hadn’t Zemo had a book? Maybe it was here?

Tony searched the control room, trying to find evidence of the thing Zemo had used to control Barnes. There was no sign of it, but what there were were dozens of filing drawers, all of them covered in a layer of dust. Tony started digging.

—

Steve’s off his game today, Tony can tell. He’s distracted by something, mind not in the ring, and Tony takes advantage. Just like Steve and Nat taught him to. He sweeps Steve’s leg, rolls on top of him, pins his leg in a position that's precariously dangerous even for a supersoldier, and applies weight. “Yield?”

It’s late, the halls are quiet. Tony hadn’t even meant to do sparring with Steve today, but Steve had asked, so Tony had delayed his return to New York City and well, the late hour puts his mind elsewhere.

Their eyes lock. Tony’s still on top of Steve, holding him in place, threatening his knee joint. Between one breath and the next, their positions are flipped, Steve on top of Tony, both of them hard, teeth clacking. Tony doesn’t make it back to New York City that night.

—

What felt like hours later, Tony finally discovered what looked like a medical log. He’d been trying to learn Russian, but adding a new script was harder than adding a spoken language, and he was a busy man, what with covering Rogers’ ass every other day. Natasha might have been a master spy, but Steve was a puppy who hadn’t learned how to control his tail wag yet, and he left destroyed crockery in his wake. There was always some trail to some terrorist or smuggler or weapons dealer that needed cleaning up, lest Ross take notice. The point being, Tony’s Russian wasn’t exactly sparkling.

But he’d double-checked ahead of time to know what he was looking for and now he was pretty sure he’d found it. Flipping through the file, Tony found what he wanted to know almost instantly. ‘Til the end of the line. The words. Those words.

—

It’s a thing. Sort of. Tony comes to the compound. They spar. They fuck. It’s only their third time sleeping together that Steve drags him into the shower, wristband conspicuously absent. Tony touches the thin skin, for once asking permission before he looks down. Steve nods, trusting, contented. I’m with you to the end of the line, pal. “He” Steve had said. Tony doesn’t need to ask to know who “he” is. There was only one really important “he” in Steve’s life way back when. And it makes sense, too. After all, Barnes plunged to his death trying to protect Steve and Steve had tried to protect him just as hard. Of course they’re important to each other.

“Can I see yours,” Steve asks, kissing Tony’s band. Fair’s fair, Tony thinks to himself, and nods.

Steve gently unclasps the snaps and sets the band aside outside the shower. He looks down at the words and then up at Tony with a silent question. “I don’t know whose they are.”

“And you’re still okay with us?”

“Steve, I’m standing naked in a shower with you. I’m pretty damn okay with this.”

The bright grin Steve gives him feels like a gift.

—

Tony left, hauling the tape and the filing cabinets behind him. They would be useful sooner or later, he was sure. And it felt so important, hauling his literal baggage along with him back to the US. Well, first a pit stop in Wakanda so Shuri could make copies. Fry flew the quinjet on autopilot, which was maybe a mistake. Tony needed distractions and all he had were files rendered in Russian, which were frankly giving him a headache. He wanted to hate Barnes so much. But fate was literally sending him a message. Barnes. Rogers. ‘Til the end of the line.

Eventually, frustrated, he managed to sink into a fitful sleep, which took him to Wakanda’s borders. T’Challa sent along an escort at the shield wall to make sure Tony was alone and also to make sure Tony didn’t cause any undue trouble. As if he could manage anything more than a nervous breakdown at the moment. Shuri was waiting for him on the platform, and for her and her brilliant mind, he managed a tired smile.

“Brought a present for you.”

“Thank you, Tony. I would get them myself, but—”

“No, no. You’re busy in Oakland kicking science ass and shooting layups with the youth. Let the old guy take care of the analog—” Tony shuddered theatrically “—files.”

Shuri smiled more brightly and kissed him on the cheek. “You look tired. Go see my mother. She’ll be wanting to mother you.”

“I shouldn’t. I’ve gotta—”

“My brother has already ensured that General Ross cannot find you. Go. Eat some food. Get some rest. Perhaps we can talk about your latest arc reactor designs in the morning. I have some ideas.”

“I bet you do.”

Tony knew when he’d been dismissed, and he also knew he was being handled a little, but it felt nice to be handled. It felt nice to not have to be trying to outwit Ross at every turn for a little while. So he allowed Ramonda to stuff him full of delicious, spicy food and then shuffled off to the guest wing, intent on getting at least four hours before he took off.

But the second he laid down, he was awake and restless, unable to settle. His thoughts kept going back to those files, going back to the “end of the line,” thinking again and again about the letters carved into Steve’s skin. How many times had he kissed that wrist? How many times had Steve kissed his? How was it fair, that Steve would be Tony’s words, but Tony wouldn’t be Steve’s?

Fed up, he yanked on a pair of loose cotton pants and a loose cotton T-shirt and wandered the palace, looking for distraction. None of the guards stopped him, though they watched him with considerable distrust. He didn’t blame them. He wouldn’t trust him either. Not anymore. It was only when he heard the sound of skin slapping leather that he stopped short. That sounded like… But it couldn’t be. All the same, he pushed through the door, freezing as he discovered a huge training ground, Steve inside, alone at a punching bag.

Steve froze too, and the bag caught him on the backswing, smacking him straight in the nose. Tony found himself caught between laughing and rushing forward with concern, and ended up doing a bit of both, snorting as he approached, though he remained well out of Steve’s personal bubble. “Smooth, Cap.”

“Tony, what are you doing here?”

Tony scuffed his toes into the mats, which felt solid right up until he kicked them and then gave way like kinetic sand. It felt heavenly and he wanted to play with it and see what it was made out of. “Oh, you know. Just dropped in for a cuppa with the King.”

“Did…did you bring those files?” Steve remained sprawled on the floor, looking up at him, a trickle of blood trailing from his nose.

“And if I did?”

Steve swallowed heavily, rubbing at the blood and smearing it. And then he was up, faster than Tony could react to, holding Tony, kissing him sloppily through mumbled “I’m sorry’s.” Tony didn’t know how to react. Was this what an out-of-body experience felt like? He remained motionless even as Steve broke away, jumping back, looking more unsure than he’d looked since he and Tony first met. “Shit. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have… You don’t want…” Steve took a huge breath and squared his shoulders, looking Tony in the eye. “That was wrong of me. I hurt you. In so many ways. It was wrong of me to kiss you.”

“Also pretty sure you’re cheating on your boyfriend if you kiss me. Don’t forget that bit.”

The little line between Steve’s eyebrows deepened. “Bucky and I, we’re not… We’re just not. I thought we would. But I can’t. Every time I tried, I felt like I was betraying you. And Bucky felt like it was wrong, too. We didn’t…we didn’t click. Not romantically, anyway.”

“You’re not…” Tony could barely dare to let himself to hope. “Didn’t you back in the war, though?”

“No. No, we didn’t. It was too much, running missions, fighting Hydra. Plus, he was afraid I’d get caught and outed. So we didn’t. I should’ve told you. But I didn��t think it mattered.”

All the thoughts Tony used to have about the words, the idea that maybe they had nothing at all to do with romance, came back to him. He ran a finger over his own wrist, where Steve’s words were hidden.

“Hey, Steve?”

“Yeah?” Steve stood there, square, looking as though he was waiting to be punched, ready to take his punishment like a man.

“Wanna spar?”

#writing #fanfiction #steve/tony #stony #angst with a happy ending #team angst

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breadoffoxy · 4 years

Text

The Rule of Fries

Summary: Misadventures with your friends at a restaurant where you learn about the seriousness of french fry theft and how nice Jimin’s thighs are.

Written for the BTS Ghostie Writers Bingo Bash. Prompt: Stealing Food

Pairing: Jimin x n. Reader

Genre: Crack, humor, some fluff

Warnings: Just people being stupid, Jimin’s thighs, language

Word Count: 1,547

"Looks like everyone else is going to be late." Jin says while scrolling through his phone.

"Ah, Yoongi no! That doesn't mean its nap time." you exclaim when the sharp-eyed man starts to shift into a laying down position. He groans as you practically lay across the bench to try to keep him propped up.

Here you are in a packed restaurant, Taehyung's favorite burger joint, in one of the larger circular booths in the back. Your group of friends are doing a weekend meal together but it appears the rest of them are stuck in traffic.

Jin, Yoongi, Jimin, and you spread yourselves out along the curved booth hoping it would deter people asking you if the spot at the end was taken. The staff keeps giving your group the stink eye with four people taking up such a large space during the dinner rush. Well, it looks like three now since Jimin offered to get your meal at the counter when the numbered was called.

What a chivalrous man.

"Yeah, you have no idea who was sitting there before, you know. What if they had a sweaty bottom." Jin supplies.

Yoongi and you make a face and the sleepy man finally sits back upright. He levels a disgusted look at his friend while you let out a strangled, revolted groan.

"That is so gross Jin. Why would you even say that?" You question the man now laughing heartily at the death looks he is getting.

Yoongi takes a look down at Jin's butt. "I guess you must know what that's like."

Jin ceases his laughing and throws a serious look at the shorter man. "Actually, no I wouldn't. My skin's flawless and doesn't sweat."

Your mouth drops in amazement at the man on the other side of the table, or maybe it’s just shock because you thought he couldn't get any worse or perfect. You couldn't decide.

"That's bullshit." Yoongi curses at Jin.

Jin leans to the side, exposing his butt to Yoongi. "Yah, go ahead and feel my dry bottom why don't you and see for yourself."

"This is a family establishment," you hiss at the handsome crazy man.

"Just because it's not sweating now doesn't mean it won't." Yoongi chimes in logically.

Jin sighs loudly and sits back in a normal position with butt fully on the bench.

"Here y/n, sorry for the wait." Jimin announces as he approaches the table with your tray and his. He puts the tray down gently in front of you with a smile, his eyes disappearing into little crescents.

"Jimin, thank you!" you cheer, your mouth watering at the large burger, fries, and milkshake in front of you waiting to be devoured. You notice something missing though.

"Ah Jimin, don't sit down yet because I need-"

"Ketchup? Here you go." The blonde takes a couple of packets from his tray and puts it on yours.

You can't help but gasp at the action. "I love you so much right now."

Jimin beams at your praise to the point where he looks like he's glowing. So much so it makes Yoongi flinch.

"Stop your disgusting flirting and just go make out already."

Jimin's glow diminishes. So much that the area around him appears darker than before as he shoots a glare at the smirking man sitting on the other side of you.

Obliviously, you start opening your ketchup packets. "This isn't flirting Yoongi. Don't be upset because I like Jimin better than you."

"Ooooh burn." Jin booms across the table at both of them.

Jimin returns to a neutral state now torn between being happy that you like him better than the snarky pianist but devastated that you never notice him actually flirting with you.

A worker yells Jin’s number across the large, noisy room. As he stands up to grab it, Yoongi's number is yelled out too. Yoongi stares at his roommate with pleading eyes, his earlier hard expression turned into an adorable pout.

Dramatically, Jin points at his slouching friend, "This is the last time you hear me."

Yoongi's pout morphs into his gummy smile at his victory. This isn't the first time Jin said those words, and it won't be the last.

"Too bad we already ordered our food." You say as you pick up a fry and dip it in ketchup. You felt it was rude to eat before the others got here, but you didn't want it to grow cold.

"I think the staff would really murder us if we took up this large table and didn't order anything." Yoongi pipes in, now slouched over the table as he waits for his food.

Jimin agrees with a thumbs up as he's busy chewing on a heartily bite of his burger. He swallows it and slurps some of his milkshake before adding, "We can always order more food when they get here."

"Do you see the size of these burgers?" You question the man. "I don't even know how you're holding them up with your baby hands."

Yoongi snickers at the pout on Jimin's face.

"I don't have baby hands." Jimin grumbles as he inspects his rather small hands.

Jin shortly arrives with his and Yoongi's food. He sits down gracefully before sliding a tray across to his slouching roommate.

"The last time, seriously."

Yoongi says something but its illegible what exactly with his mouth now stuffed with food.

"You're welcome." replies Jin as though he knows what the other man is saying. You never know though; they've been roommates for years so they probably have a translation guide for each other nailed down by now.

Picking up another fry, you remember what you've been wanting to ask Jin. "Oh, how did your date go the other day?"

Jin frowns in concentration as he remembers the events. He's seen this person a couple times now, but has been conflicted about wanting to continue things or not.

"It was fun. I love how they laugh at all my jokes and they look so cute. There was just something though that...I don't know it's silly."

"No go on, tell us." You encourage between sips of your milkshake.

Jin's expression turns vexed with infuriated eyes as he recalls the events. "They stole a french fry. Can you believe it?"

You remain silent, honestly think this is another one of the man's jokes. His grave features though quickly tell you it is not. Jin slams his hands on the table. "I was just talking to them and there they go, just reaching across the table all casual, and pluck it straight off of my plate. I was so shocked I didn't know what to say."

And Jin always knows what to say.

"Wait, what seriously? It's just one fry what's the big deal?"

"Dump their ass." advises Yoongi in complete seriousness.

You guffaw in complete shock as you note Jimin nodding seriously beside you.

At your unbelieving expression, Yoongi picks up a fry and points it at you. "Rule number two of life, never steal another person's fries."

"What's number one then smart guy?" You ask curiously.

"Never wake me up when I'm sleeping." The genius enlightens. You swear you see Jin shiver in fear for a second.

"That's...very valid." You add, as you know how Yoongi can be in the mornings and especially before his coffee.

"Don't worry y/n." Jimin slides his tray of food closer to you. "I'd let you steal all the fries you want." He props an arm up on the table, and rests his head in his palm as he stares at you with starry eyes.

"Awww, Jimin that's so sweet. Thank you." You reach over and pat one of his strong thighs as the other hand grabs a few of his fries. There's a slight twitch at your touch before you feel hard muscle flex under your hand. He looks at you coyly as your eyebrows raise in intrigue.

Is it just you or is it getting hot in here?

The moment is ruined by the sound of Yoongi gagging. You whip around to make sure that's he is ok. The smirk Yoongi is giving Jimin and you is a deviant one. You punch him in the arm for making you worry unnecessarily. You can feel the coldness of Jimin's pointed glare from next to you.

"This is a family establishment." Jin parrots back at you, clearly amused at the situation.

It doesn't take much longer for the others to arrive. When they reach your table, your small group cheers at their approach.

"I see you already ordered." Namjoon greets as he looks across the herd of people and at the large menu hanging from the wall.

"We were planning on ordering more." Jin supplies.

"We were hungry." You punch Yoongi's arm again. At Hoseok's pout, Yoongi mumbles out a sorry.

Jimin does his secret handshake with an excited Taehyung before sliding down to make room for his best friend. Jimin’s warmth is now pressed up against your side. Before Taehyung can slide Jimin's tray down a large hand snatches a couple of fries. Jungkook's absentmindedly looking over at the menu, snacking on the stolen fries.

"Jungkook, you asshole."

At Jimin's outrage, Jungkook finally notices the seven exasperated looks he's getting.

"...What?"

#btsghostie #btsghostiebingo #bts fanfiction #jimin fanfiction #jimin x reader #bts crack #chaotic bts #Jin and Yoongi are roommates #my writing #The Rule of Fries

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sunflowerhae · 4 years

Text

Linger

Episode • 1/8

Mobile Masterlist •

♡ ☾ ✐

Authors note• bro this is so long I’m so sorry I’m breaking it into parts for u (I HATE MY LIFE)

Warnings• mentions of death, language

Songs• something - the Beatles/ With love, Vincent - Murray Gold/ she’s so lovely - beach house

•Na Jaemin remembers the exact moment he first laid his eyes on Y/N Y/L/N.

•He was standing by his locker on the first day of sophomore year

•laughing with Jeno and Haechan about their new math teacher

•when she walked past him with two other girls, smiling and holding some books in her arms.

•Jaemin will tell anyone that listens that this was the first time he felt the air knocked out of his lungs

•He remembers thinking that she was the most beautiful girl that he had ever seen.

•He didn’t know who she was; he had never seen her before (he would remember) (sike he’s stupid)

•yet he knew that he would marry that girl.

•he was worried bc he didn’t know who tF she was, but don’t worry bc the second time he ever saw her was maybe 6 minutes later

•he walked into his 4th period Honors English 10 class, and she was talking to the teacher across the classroom, before moving and sitting down in the first empty seat she saw.

•Jaemin didn’t know what to do

•his new mystery dream girl was in his class.

•Should he sit next to her?

•Should he just ignore her and talk to her later?

•what is gonna wear?

•is he gonna cry?

•Jaemin didn’t have much time to decide

• a mere 10 second delay was all it took for three boys (also on the football team with Jaemin) to enter the room and wrap their arms around his shoulder

•ushering him over to an empty table in the back while showcasing their excitement about being in the same class together.

•Jaemin tried not to show his disappointment, and instead gave one of his usual, dazzling smiles (ya know the one!) while joking along with them

•trying to forget about the mystery girl (and the excitement he got when he learned her name during roll call)

•It was then that Na Jaemin’s and Y/N Y/L/N’s rolls in their story were set in stone.

•He would be the popular boy that everyone knew, but didn’t really know

•and you would be the quiet girl that only a few, special people knew of, but those people were your closest friends.

•And over the course of the next two years, it would stay that way. •Jaemin, secretly pining for you

•and you, thinking the beautiful boy as untouchable.

•That would, however, change, on one god forsaken, cloudy Friday.

•A Friday that would forever be ingrained in Jaemins memory as the day he sealed his lonely fate in the world

•and the day he lost his true soulmate

•before he even talked to her.

•If Haechan’s persistent moaning and groaning about school wasn’t enough

•the weather was gloomy and cloudy

•and anyone with eyes could tell that rain was to be expected. •Jaemin, secretly, didn’t mind.

•Although he would never share it, he loved the rain.

•What he did mind, was his friends continuous bitching.

•”Hyuck, shut up,” -Renjun, 2020

•I mean he wasn’t even paying attention to the group, too preoccupied w his sketch book, sometimes glancing up at a girl that sat across the school yard, before looking back down at his sketch book (spoilers for something I’m writing??? Hehe you’ll never know hehe)

•all Jeno did was MenTion that rainy weather meant football practice would be cancelled

•hyucks smile was BaCk

•Jaemin was not impressed

•okay the conversation went something like this

“Damn Na, why are you looking at me like how my mom looks when my report card come in?” -full sun

•You literally insulted football to my face.” -nana

•haechan let out a loud laugh

•at Jaemin’s expense

•“you don’t know the ups and downs of High-school football” -nojam and injunnie

•also at Jaemins expense

•due to an ongoing joke that Jaemin reminded their friend group of the teenage redhead from riverdale

•Na Jaemin was so upset, he didn’t even eat his fries.

•”I wouldn’t care so much if I wasn’t the fucking captain of the team, hyuck. I mean, I gotta hold you responsible to a certain degree, you’re the fucking quarterback!” -Na Jaemin

•someone bully him

•so as that is happening, 2/3 of the missing members of their group come in HOT

•I mean literally

•they’re breathing heavily and everything

•acting like they just ran a mf marathon

•jisung YEETS his bag in the table (covering Renjuns sketchbook, which annoyed the fuck out of the older boy, but really who cares)

•”Guys guys guys! You will never guess who we just saw in the library!” -Mochi

•”lemme give it a try; mark?” -bitch ass Chinese bitch (renjun)

•”No! We saw Mar- wait what? How’d you know?” -child prodigy Zhong Chenle

•“Uhh, maybe because he texted in the group chat that he was gonna be in the library?” -nojam makin a comeback

•”Okay okay, but - can I have a fry? - did hew shay who hedt be wif?”

•”Swallow your fucking food first, le.” -smart boy you guess who

(Whew are y’all getting sensory overload like I AM)

•“He said, did he say who he’d be with, though? No, he didn’t, but guess who WE saw him with,” -jisung bringing the T E A.

•no one answers

•Chenle and jisung give each other the “we’re friends w dumbasses” look

•“Y/n! He was sitting with y/n!”

•oh shit

•Everyone quickly turned their heads to Jaemin

•tell me why this boy was glaring at the table like it messed w his daughter

•Out of everyone ever, the only people who knew about Jaemins secret crush was the 5 boys sitting with Jaemin

•and the one sitting in the library with said secret crush.

•They didn’t even really know, they just knew that they once saw Jaemin slip something like a note into Y/n’s locker junior year

•and Jaemin made up a bullshit excuse that it was something for class that no one

•-not even Jeno, who always trusted his friends -

•believed.

•”why aren’t you mad”

•”you should be angry”

•literally all of the present boys were THROWING it on jaemin

•and naturally -

•he deflected

•”bro I’m not even upset, I don’t like y/n!”

•lmao K

•now at this point

•the boys thought they were helping

•really

•it was innocent they promise.

•really how were they to know what was going to happen

•so hyuck had JOKED and said that if Jaemin didn’t like u, he wouldn’t mind hurting u

•it was super harmless

•unTil

•some other popular ppl walked over RIGHT as Haechan said that

•and he was like oh fuck

•but silently

•bc Haechan knew what Jaemin was like

•if it was just their lil group still, Jaemin would have told hyuck to fuck off

•but Jaemin was terrified to lose his reputation

•he was an insecure boy

•he would have really done anything to keep his position as most popular boy in school

•so when one of his jock friends dares Jaemin to get you to date him until prom, get ur virginity the night before, and then ditch u at prom and tell you it was all a dare in front of everyone and that he never liked you

•well

•he stupidly agrees

•the dreamies agree with it

•only bc they don’t actually think Jaemin will last

•they think he’ll back out last minute and stay w you

•and that Jaemin will finally get u

•wishful thinking

•you were failing math

•it’s not that you were stupid, you weren’t

•you just R E A L L Y hated math

•and your mom was so upset w your grade

•my girl forced u to get a tutor

•good thing u knew mark

•he agreed to meet w you in the library Tuesday’s and Wednesday’s at lunch

•and Thursday’s if you needed it

•thank god 4 mark

•everything was going Super Fine™️

•up until you both look up when you hear squealing and the sound of someone smacking someone else

•and there’s jisung and Chenle,

•staring at you both

•and squealing

•and smacking each other on the arms

•before just plain running out

•”if I don’t go after them, they’ll tell all of our friends that we’re marrying each other, so i should go.” -Mark fucking Lee

•so you’re walking towards your locker to put all of your math work in it,

•and when you open it, a lil note falls out and flutters to the ground

•your smile: 3% -> 95%

•honestly you were kinda having a shitty day

•so you were so happy to see a note in your locker

•you had been receiving love notes since you were in sophomore year

•you don’t remember exactly when during the year

•but one day, they were just there

•you were excited to add another one to your box

•this one wasn’t big, it just said “Your Personality makes me want to be a better person! I hope you have a beautiful day, sunshine!”

•the rim of the paper had squiggly yellow lines, and the bottom had a poorly drawn sunshine, with a heart, like always

•you didn’t know who your secret admirer was

•but you wish you did

•u lowkey loved them

•you’re still smiling about it as you walk into your 7th period math class

•and the note was found at lunch, like an hour ago

•they make you so happy

•you silently sat down in your seat, and stared off into space with a dreamy look on your face

•and THATS how Jaemin knew you got his note

•you always had that look when you read his notes

•not that you knew it was from him

•it made him so happy

•even if you two had never talked before, he still freaking loved that he could make you smile

•Jaemin wasn’t happy for long

•he tried not to let you notice him staring at you in class,

•it was kinda hard, seeing as you two literally sat next to each other

•he couldn’t believe he had to break your heart

•he wanted to die lowkey lol

•but he had to do it

•not really, but really

•so he took a deep breath

•and opened his mouth

Continued here

{taglist}

@ivietea @fiveguysgoodbyeguys @comically-sleep-deprived @woosans-sann @mozartwasajungkookstan @littlefluu @cxcxlxlee @jaesluvklub @uyuzo @sweetie-yoongi7 @marklexleaf

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the-regal-warrior · 4 years

Text

Cadre Weaponry: The Fights

I promised you guys new Cadre Weaponry content, and here it is! So the following scenes take place during the original chapters of the story, but they’re all put here in chronological order for you!

I had so much fun returning to this universe, and I hope you all enjoy it as much as I did!

Summary: Welcome to Cadre Weaponry - the shop for all your weapons needs, both antique and modern! Join the boys of the Cadre as they become friends and tackle this thing we call life. Maybe, just maybe, they’ll even find love along the way.

We all know our boys in the Cadre found their happily-ever-afters, but it wasn’t always smooth sailing. Here’s a look at the fights that almost cost our beloved boys everything.

Warnings: I’m pretty sure it’s just language in this one.

FOUR YEARS, TWO MONTHS, AND SIXTEEN DAYS AGO

Rowan woke to the feeling of nails scraping down his back, Aelin tossing and turning in bed behind him. Rolling over, he took in the tears tracking down her cheeks and the little whimpers she was making in her sleep - another nightmare. Though they’d only been together for seven months, he’d learned that her sleep was plagued by her past traumas - whatever they were.

That wasn’t a conversation they’d had yet.

Just as he went to reach for her, she shot into a sitting position, a heart-wrenching shriek tearing from her throat. The motion had been violent enough that she woke herself up, her shout cutting short as she realized where she was.

“Aelin?” he questioned tentatively, reaching out to push a strand of hair behind her ear as he sat up next to her.

She flinched at the contact, whipping her head around to face him. His stomach clenched at the broken expression on her face. “I’m sorry,” she said, though her voice was shaky, and she barely managed to get both words out before she was sobbing.

“Oh, my love, come here,” he whispered, wrapping his arms around her shoulders and pulling her into him. She buried her face in his neck, her tears warm against the skin of his neck. He tangled one hand in her golden hair, the other rubbing over her spine as he rocked them back and forth. “It’s going to be okay, love,” he murmured, pressing soothing kisses to her hair. “You’re safe, baby, you’re safe. I’ve got you, Fireheart. I’m right here.”

He continued rocking her and whispering quietly in her ear, and though it took her a few minutes to calm down, she eventually fell asleep with her head on his chest. He pressed one final kiss to her forehead as he pulled the blankets closer around them. Dropping his head onto his pillow, he felt the lull of sleep coming to claim him in only a matter of seconds.

Before he fell back into his dreams, he told himself that he’d ask Aelin about her nightmares in the morning.

~*^*~

Walking out of the bathroom, Rowan chuckled at the way Aelin’s eyes immediately flickered to the towel wrapped around his waist. She was lounging on her bed in nothing but an emerald green silk nightgown. The way she was reclined on the pillows had the lace at the bottom of the very short nightgown playing hide and seek with her thighs, and Rowan couldn’t keep his eyes from drinking her in.

She smirked at him, and he dropped the towel. He couldn’t help but chuckle at the way her eyes widened. “See something you like, Fireheart?”

“You could say that,” she replied, voice husky from sleep. Her eyes never left him, even as he got dressed for his day at work. “Though I preferred when you didn’t have all those layers on.”

He laughed, dropping next to her as he pulled a t-shirt over his head. “Sorry, but some of us have to go to work early this morning.”

“I know,” she sighed, pulling the blankets up to her chin. “And some of us get to stay in bed for another hour.”

Rowan flicked her nose, though he sobered up when he remembered her nightmare from the night before. “Can I ask you a question?”

“Sure, love. Anything you want.”

“Even if I want to know what your nightmares are about?” He watched her expression as he asked, and his heart stopped when her features closed off. “It’s just,” he added, hoping that she wouldn’t shut down the conversation like she always did, “they seem like they’re really bad, and I’m just trying to understand why. I just want to help.”

Aelin sighed again, though this one had none of the playfulness of the first, and she refused to meet his eyes. “It’s nothing, Ro. They’re just stupid dreams.”

Pinching the bridge of his nose, he stood up and stalked to her desk. “Stupid dreams don’t leave you sobbing in the middle of the night, Aelin. Nightmares do. And I’d say they’d have to be pretty traumatic ones, too. So, what is it? What are you keeping from me?”

“Rowan, I already told you, it’s nothing. Okay? It’s nothing.” He’d grabbed his phone and wallet from her desk by the time she’d stopped speaking, and he was halfway to her door before she protested. “Rowan, where are you going? Don’t just walk away from me! Talk to me - why are you so upset about this?.”

“Oh, you want me to talk? You don’t like it when I don’t tell you things?” He was practically snarling, and he watched the fire grew in his girlfriend’s eyes. “Now you know how I feel.”

“And what the fuck is that supposed to mean?” she spat.

“It means you’re always keeping secrets. It took you months to tell me that you and Chaol had dated, even though I don’t care that you’re friends with your ex, and I practically had to pry any information about Sam out of you.” He decided to ignore the fact that she’d only told him about that within the last month. She’d dated Sam Cortland all through high school, and they thought they’d last despite getting into universities on opposite sides of the continent. Meeting Chaol as a freshman had made her rethink her relationship with Sam, and it had destroyed her to end things with him. They’d ultimately agreed they were better off as friends, and remained so even now, but it had been hard on both of them. “I hardly know anything about your past because you won’t tell me. I’m so tired of the secrets, Aelin.” He was at the door, and the look she gave him when she saw his hand resting on the handle was a mix of anger and fear. “Look, I want to be with you, but I can’t handle all the secrets. I just can’t.”

“Rowan,” she huffed, “I just -.”

“No, Aelin. I don’t want excuses. I want the truth. But I don’t have the time to wait for you to give me it.” He pulled the door open. “I’m late for work.”

She tried to protest, but he’d slammed the door before she could get the words out. He stalked out of her apartment, his heart breaking as a big part of it stayed in the room with the woman behind him.

~*^*~

It had been a long day - one of the longest ones he’d had in a while. All Rowan wanted to do was go home and avoid the world for a while, but he knew he couldn’t. Fighting with Aelin wasn’t something he enjoyed, and he knew they needed to talk about this.

Aelin seemed to know it too, since she’d texted him and asked him to come over after work.

So that’s what he did. Even though they hadn’t been together all that long, he knew he loved her. So he parked his Bronco and climbed out, not sure what he was walking into.

When he knocked on her front door, he heard muffled cursing from the direction of the kitchen before she shouted that it was open and he could let himself in. He did, and was immediately greeted with the smell of food and the sight of his girlfriend swearing at something on the stove.

“Everything okay in here?” he questioned.

She just groaned and switched off the burner, pulling the frying pan onto a cool one. “Not exactly. I wanted to do something to apologize for this morning but nothing is working.” She must have caught the knowing look he was giving her, because she gave him a stern look. “And before you make any smart comments, just know I’m making you breakfast for dinner.”

He couldn’t help the bark of laughter that escaped him. Anyone who knew Aelin knew that, though she had many talents, cooking wasn’t one of them. She could usually manage breakfast food, but even that didn’t always work.

“Don’t laugh!” she cried, tossing the hand towel at him. “I really wanted this to be perfect because I’m so sorry about what happened. But the waffle batter didn’t mix right, the knob on the toaster broke so the toast burned, and the eggs are all rubbery!” She had tears lining her eyes, and he could see how frustrated she was. “I just - I was going to feed you and then explain my nightmares in this grand gesture because I hate fighting and I don’t want to lose you!”

“Fireheart,” he murmured, “come here.” Taking her into his arms, he stared into her eyes. “I love that you wanted to do this for me, but I’m the one who should be apologizing. Your past is yours, and I shouldn’t have pushed you to share it if you weren’t ready. I just want to help, but I want you to tell me because you want to, not because I’m a pushy buzzard.”

She laughed a little shakily, leaning her face into his palm when he wiped her tears away. “Well, you can be pushy, buzzard. But I want to share this - this very painful, very ugly part of my past - with you.”

His heart fluttered against his ribcage, hard enough that Aelin could probably hear it, and he smiled at her. “I’m honored, my love.”

She leaned up to kiss him once, twice, three times before taking his hand and pulling him toward the couch. As soon as he was sitting she crawled into his lap, legs stretched out and their hands tangled in her lap. “I don’t talk about this because it’s still painful, but I want you to know.”

Rowan watched her as she started talking, and he saw the way she rolled her shoulders as she settled into what she had to say. “I’m with you, Fireheart. To whatever end.”

Aelin nodded and offered him a small smile before the story spilled over her lips. “Okay, so I know I told you my dad was in the military, but that wasn’t all of it. He was actually in a very secret, very high-level branch of the army, and he was part of quite a few covert operations. Naturally, that meant he made some enemies - enemies who kept track of him even after he retired from the army and opened the business with my mom.” She paused to take a breath, and Rowan knew that the hard part of the story was coming.

He rubbed his thumbs along her thighs, and she seemed to draw comfort from the gesture. “One day, when I was visiting my parents at their office building, three guys came in with guns. I just thought it was a robbery, but they were actually some guys in a rebel gang that my dad had busted when he was in the army. I guess they knew I was there, because one of them grabbed me. I was sixteen and my dad had taught me how to fight when I was little, so that’s what I tried to do. The guy didn’t appreciate that - so he threw me into decorative mirror hanging in the lobby. I know you’ve seen the scars on my back. That’s what they’re from.”

“Holy rutting gods,” Rowan whispered, feeling his eyes widen in shock.

“Yeah, basically. And that was the exact moment my dad happened to walk in the room. He tried to get to me, so one of the other guys grabbed me and held a knife to my throat. That’s when the third one gave me that long scar that slashes across my back - he cut me with a knife because he knew my dad was watching. I was so terrified, and I was just bleeding from so many different wounds, and I just wanted my parents. The next thing I knew, there were gunshots echoing around me and I was covered in even more blood. Apparently my dad had pretty tight security, because he had three snipers take out the guys that broke in simultaneously.” She rubbed her eyes, shoulders slumping as she let out a deep breath. “And that’s what I have nightmares about.”

Rowan wrapped an arm around her shoulders, pulling her into his chest as her head fell into his neck. “My love, I had no idea. Thank you so much for trusting me enough to share this with me.” He pressed a kiss to her forehead, lips lingering against her skin when he said, “although now I feel even worse that I freaked out when you wouldn’t tell me about this.”

“Oh, Rowan, no,” she cried, taking his face between her hands so he had no choice but to look into her beautiful eyes. “No, don’t feel bad about this for a second. I never shared it with you because I hate remembering how weak I was and I always thought sharing it would make me feel worse about the whole thing, but that’s not true. I feel so much better now that I’ve opened up about it - almost like I reclaimed the part of myself that was scared of it and it made me feel stronger.”

“Well, I’m glad I could help out,” he replied, nipping at her thumb when she ran it along his bottom lip. “I wish I could do more, though.”

“Buzzard, you’ve already done so much,” she whispered, pressing a soft kiss to his lips. “The fact that you’re here means more to me than anything else could.”

Rowan kissed her, a claiming kiss that was filled with his love and affection for the amazing woman in his arms. “You, my strong, brave girlfriend, are so absolutely amazing. Did you know that?”

“Yeah, well, your amazing girlfriend couldn’t even make you dinner like she wanted to.” Aelin giggled against his lips, breaking away only when he pinched her sides and she had to gasp for air as he tickled her. “How about we order takeout instead?”

“Absolutely not,” Rowan stated. He shooed Aelin off his lap and pushed her in the direction of her kitchen. “We’re going to make breakfast for dinner, just like you wanted to. We’re going to do this together, Fireheart.”

“That sounds perfect, buzzard.”

THREE YEARS, ONE MONTH, AND EIGHT DAYS AGO

Fenrys reached out and grabbed Asterin around the waist, hauling her back against his chest. She shrieked in surprise, although it quickly turned to laughter as she twisted in his embrace, her arms coming to twine around his neck.

He laughed along with her, his heart soaring as he took in the sheer happiness on her face. “Hi,” he whispered, pressing the barest hint of a kiss against her lips.

“Hi,” she murmured back, smiling when he pulled away. Rocking up on her toes, she kissed the tip of his nose. When he laughed, a deep chuckle that bubbled out of his throat, she pressed a kiss to his lips, her teeth catching on the bottom one as she pulled back.

Groaning at the sensation, Fenrys slid his hands from her waist to her thighs, squeezing her ass once, twice in the process. Lifting her into his arms, he started walking as soon as her legs had locked around his waist.

Asterin moaned at the feeling of being pressed against him, and he delighted at the pure need in the sound. With the way she was wrapped around him, he found himself panting with every step he took. She had started kissing him, her tongue twisting around his, by the time he reached the couch, though it was short-lived.

He practically threw himself onto the couch, and Asterin broke their kiss to squeal at the suddenness of the motion. She was giggling in the next second, Fen’s own chuckles ringing through the air to join hers.

“You’re so dramatic,” she laughed, one hand playing with a strand of his hair while she traced random patterns on his chest with the other. “And yet I love you.”

“And yet you love me,” he confirmed, “just as I love you.” She blushed at that, and his heart swelled with pride. “I love how, even after you’ve agreed to marry me, hearing that I love you still makes you blush.”

She grinned at that, though something about the expression didn’t look quite right. With a start, Fen realized that it didn’t reach her eyes. In fact, there were tears building in her eyes.

“Rin,” he started, reaching up to wipe a thumb under her eyes, “what’s wrong, love?”

“I just…” she sniffed, taking a breath to get her voice under control. “I just don’t understand why you love me.”

He could feel his jaw fall to the floor, could feel that he was staring at her with a confused expression, but there was nothing he could do to stop it as shock coursed through his system. “What?” he finally spluttered.

Tears were streaming down her face as she pushed off his lap. Stumbling back two steps, she sank down on the coffee table. “I’ve been thinking on this for a while, and I can’t understand it. I don’t see how you can love me when I’ll never be enough for you.”

“Asterin, what -,” Fenrys tried to protest, but she cut him off.

“Fen, please, just don’t.” She stood up, and he felt his heart breaking with every step she took toward his door. “I can’t do this,” she whispered. “I can’t be with you when I know I’ll never be enough. I’m not good for you, Fenrys - I’ll only let you down.” She stared at him for a moment and then she was gone, the door slamming behind her.

Fenrys felt his heart shatter when that door closed. He stared at it for a couple minutes, unable to comprehend what had happened.

When he finally got his wits about him, he knew there was only one thing he could do.

Barely taking the time to grab his keys and lock the door, he was sprinting down the stairs.

~*^*~

Resting his elbows on his knees, Fenrys dropped his head in his hands, the wood of Asterin’s door cool against his flushed skin, even through his t-shirt. He’d sprinted the five blocks to her apartment, praying he’d still manage to beat her there even after his five-minute stupor.

He’d sighed in relief when he didn’t see her car in the lot, but it quickly faded when he realized it was because he’d been right - she’d most likely had a breakdown in her car that had kept her from leaving right away.

He’d been sitting by her door for at least five minutes and he could feel himself getting anxious. He didn’t know what had caused her outburst, but he needed to get to the bottom of it. He couldn’t lose her. He just couldn’t.

He’d just dropped his head back against the door when he heard footsteps rounding the corner. Lifting his head just as she took notice of him, he watched fresh tears slide down her cheeks. He jumped to his feet as she gaped at him.

“What are you doing here?” she gasped, the tears making her voice thick.

“Fighting for the love of my life.” He watched her sob harder at his words, and he reached a hand out to her. “Please, baby - talk to me. Please. I can’t - I can’t lose you. So, please just talk to me. Tell me what’s going on. Please.” Fenrys was crying by the time he’d finished speaking. He loved this woman more than anything in the world and he couldn’t stand to see her so upset.

She mulled it over for several moments - he could practically see the gears turning in her head - before finally nodding and motioning for him to move so she could open the door.

Fenrys followed her inside, scrubbing the backs of his hands over his cheeks in an attempt to brush away some of his lingering tears.

“Okay, Fen,” Asterin sighed, slumping into her oversized recliner. “What do you want to talk about?”

He sat on the coffee table, caging her legs between his own. “I want to know what’s gotten into you. Why don’t you think you’re enough for me, or that you’ll just let me down?”

Watching the tears build in her eyes again at the question, he struggled not to reach out and take her in his arms. Asterin swallowed before finally answering him. “Because of my ex.”

She’d started crying as she said it, and Fenrys rested a hand on her knee to show her that he was there. He knew she’d had a relationship - a long one - that hadn’t ended well, but he’d never pushed her on it. He knew she’d talk when she was ready.

“I know we’ve talked about how I had a pretty bad break-up - that’s where this is coming from.” She dropped her hand on top of the one he had on her knee, her eyes fixed on her engagement ring. “I really thought he and I would be together forever. I was expecting a proposal - what I got was a broken heart. He came home one day and told me that we were done because he could never love me. He said that I was a disappointment and that I’d let him down - he said that I could never be enough for him.”

Asterin was openly sobbing by the end, and Fen climbed into the recliner next to her, pulling her into his lap as he did. “I’m so sorry, my love.”

She cried into his chest, one hand fisted in his shirt. ‘He told me I was just a mistake, and I don’t want to be your mistake too, Fen. It would kill me.”

Burying his face in her hair, Fenrys let her cry until she didn’t have any tears left. It killed him to see her like this, and he needed her to know that he was always going to be there for her.

Once she’d calmed down, Fenrys lifted her chin until her eyes met his. He slipped his fingers over her jaw so he could cup her cheek, and she pressed a quick kiss to his palm before meeting his eyes once more. “Asterin, I want you to listen to me, okay?”

She nodded, and he kissed her forehead.

“I love you, Asterin Blackbeak. Okay? I love you. You are, without a doubt, the best thing that’s ever happened to me. You could never let me down or disappoint me. I’m so proud of you every day. Every single day. You, my love, are so much more than enough for me - you always will be. You will never be a mistake - never. The only mistake would be not spending the rest of my life with you. Okay, my love?”

“Okay,” she whispered, a small smile on her face even though tears still sparkled in her eyes. “Gods, Fen, I love you so much. I”m sorry for all of this.”

“You don’t ever have to apologize for the way you feel, baby.” Fenrys pressed another kiss to her forehead. “Just, in the future, promise that you’ll come to me when you feel this way, instead of keeping it all inside?”

“Okay, I promise, Fen. I promise.” Asterin leaned up to kiss him, and he pulled her closer. When she pulled away, he was relieved to see that she was smiling - though the giggles that accompanied it were a little concerning.

“Something funny to you, Rin?”

“No,” she giggled, kissing his jaw. “I just can’t believe how lucky I got when I met you.”

Grinning down at her, he kissed her temple. “I’m the lucky one.”

TWO YEARS, SEVEN MONTHS, AND TWENTY DAYS AGO

Vaughan groaned as he threw himself down on Sorrel’s bed, her laughter echoing around him as he landed with his face pressed against her stomach. He chuckled against her skin, the cropped t-shirt she was wearing baring her smooth skin to him. Breathing in her scent, he enjoyed being able to just take the time to be with her.

Carding her fingers through his hair, Sorrel began humming, and he lost himself in the rambling melody. He was grateful for her - whatever she was to him, as they’d never defined it, never put a label on it - and moments like this reminded him why.

He lifted his head just as her tune came to an end, the last note hanging in the air between them. Grinning at the peaceful expression on her face, he rolled until he was next to her, their hands laced between them.

“You’ll never guess what happened today,” Sorrel said, her thumb trailing over the back of his hand.

Turning his head to look at her, he raised one eyebrow, causing her to giggle. “You’re right, I probably won’t. What happened, babe?”

“Well, I was at Crochan Antiques to visit Bronwen,” she started, “and Una - one of the girls who works for her - was talking about you.”

She cut herself off, and Vaughan prodded her in the shin with his foot. “And?”

“And, well, she kind of called you my boyfriend.”

He could see her lips moving, could hear the sounds coming from them, but he stopped processing what they meant. Sitting up abruptly enough that he yanked his hand from hers as emotions swirled in his head, he felt his face twist into something angry.

“But I’m not.” Vaughan interrupted whatever she’d been saying, the words practically ripping out of his throat.

She sat up, a confused expression on her face. He realized he’s spoken too quickly for her to understand.

“I’m not your boyfriend,” he growled.

“Vaughan, I know that, but -.”

“I’m not your boyfriend,” he repeated, “and you’re not my girlfriend. We aren’t a couple.”

Sorrel only stared at him, almost like she didn’t understand why he was so upset, and that made him angrier.

“I told you when we started this that I didn’t want a relationship, couldn’t be in one. I told you this would just be sex, nothing else. I thought you understood that. Clearly I was wrong.”

“What the hell are you talking about?” she cried, reaching out to poke him in the chest. “Of course I understand what this is, what we are!”

He snorted derisively, shoving away her hand. “Yeah? And yet you let all your friends call me your boyfriend?”

“No, Vaughan, if you would just listen to me -.”

He was standing before she could get any further. “No,” he spat, backing toward her bedroom door, “I’m done listening. I really thought you were different, but you’re not. You’re just like every other girl I’ve been with - you say you can handle sex without a relationship and then you can’t. You’re just another disappointment.” He could see the confusion on her face fade as it was replaced by anger and hurt, and he knew that it would bother him when he thought on it when he got home, but he couldn’t keep the words in.

Her bedroom door slamming behind him, Vaughan squeezed his eyes shut as he felt the pressure of tears building. He left her apartment, his thoughts whirling.

He’d always avoided relationships and commitments, too afraid of the pain they could bring. He was terrified of letting himself get that close to someone and then having them walk way. He knew he was protecting himself, but losing Sorrel was gutting him in a way he didn’t expect.

Vaughan felt the tears he’d been trying to keep at bay start spilling down his cheeks as he reached the elevator, but he never got the chance to wipe them away. Just as he lifted his hand, someone slammed into him from behind.

Stumbling forward a couple steps before he managed to regain his balance, he turned his head just enough to see dark hair tangled with his own, meaning that the person currently clinging to his back was Sorrel.

“Sorrel, what the hell?” he spluttered, trying to pry her arms from his neck.

Sighing at him, she jumped off his back, smacking the back of his head before he could turn to face her. “Okay, asshole, I’m going to talk now, and you’re just going to listen. Got it?”

He just nodded, the anger flashing in her eyes enough to keep him from saying a word.

“Who the fuck do you think you are, calling me a disappointment after two years?” She was practically shouting, but he couldn’t blame her. “We’ve been sleeping together for almost two years, and you call me a disappointment because someone else thought we were dating? That’s not fair, and you know it. I happen to like the arrangement we have, and I wouldn’t do anything to change it. Have I ever given you a reason to think otherwise?”

“No, you haven’t,” he answered, guilt rushing through him at the thought of all the things he’d said to her, “and I’m so sorry I said what I did. You’re not a disappointment - you never could be. I’ve been burned before by girls who said they were okay with this when they really weren’t. I didn’t want that to happen here and I overreacted. And I’m so incredibly sorry.”

“Vaughan,” she sighed, though she sounded less angry. “Did any of those other girls ever stay for two years?”

He shook his head, and was relieved to hear her chuckle a little in response.

“That’s what I thought,” she muttered, reaching out to cup his cheek. He heard her gasp when she saw the tears still shining in his eyes, and she swiped some from his lashes with her thumb. “Babe, are you crying?”

“Well, yeah,” he mumbled, a blush rising to his cheeks when she kissed his chin. “You’re important to me, Sorrel, and the thought of losing you hurts.”

She nipped his chin when he finished, glaring up into his eyes even as she looped her arms around his waist. “If you wouldn’t have been such a dick, you wouldn’t have needed to put yourself through all of this.”

He wrapped his arms around her shoulders and pressed his lips to her forehead, his words muffled against her skin. “I know, I know. I’m so sorry - how can I make this up to you?”

Sorrel winked at him as her hands slid down to grip his ass. “I’m sure you’ll find a way.”

Groaning at the feeling of her hands, he lifted her into his arms and sprinted for her door, her laughter ringing through the hall.

TWO YEARS, FIVE MONTHS, AND TWELVE DAYS AGO

Lorcan pressed a kiss to Elide’s hair, smiling down at the top of her head when she made a contented noise in the back of her throat. His girlfriend just tucked herself tighter against his chest, her fingers skimming over his hand where it rested on her waist.

Squeezing her waist affectionately, he turned his gaze back to the movie they’d been watching, though his focus was still on the woman in his arms. Elide had brought so much joy to his life - a life he had been convinced he was going to spend alone. Though not all of his past relationships - if he could even call them that - had been bad, most had been. Figuring that he was just wired to make relationships fail, he’d resigned himself to being alone.

And then Elide had quite literally walked into his life.

She was everything he never knew he needed, everything he’d never dared to wish for. He felt so lucky - so incredibly blessed - to have found her, and even the thought of losing her caused him a sort of pain that left him breathless.

Blinking to clear his mind, Lorcan dropped his chin to rest on her head, losing himself in the movie as Elide pressed back into his embrace.

It wasn’t even five minutes later that his phone began to ring. Not taking his eyes from the screen, he fumbled for it, answering the call without looking to see who it was.

The voice on the other end turned the blood in his veins to ice.

“Lorcan,” Maeve purred in his ear. “I need a favor, sweetie.”

He felt Elide turn to look at him, probably because she’d felt they way he’d tensed beneath her.

“Isn’t that what Cairn’s for?” he retorted, not bothering to mask the anger in his voice.

It figured that just as he’d been thinking about his past girlfriends, the worst of them would call. He and Maeve had fucked around - he wouldn’t call it a relationship because they’d never really cared for one another - for two years soon after he’d graduated college. At the time, Lorcan really believed that he loved her, but all that changed when the truth came out and their relationship ended.

It turned out that the entire time they’d been together, she’d been sleeping with Cairn, a man she’d always claimed was just her best friend. That revelation had been ugly, and it had left Lorcan gutted.

Despite all of that, Maeve had never truly left his life. Lorcan had always been loyal, and that remained true even after their split. She would often call when she was mad at Cairn, and even though he would swear up and down that each time was the last time, he’d still go.

Maeve let out a low whine, clearly displeased with his hostility. “Cairn doesn’t understand me the way you do. And he wouldn’t understand this - he would think it’s silly.”

Lorcan sighed, his resolve already crumbling. “What do you need?” He felt Elide stiffen at his words, and she brushed away the hand he attempted to rub over her thigh.

“I got a lead in a new show, and I need help with my costume.” He could practically hear the pout in her voice. “I need your help, sweetie.”

He sighed again, even though he was already pushing off the couch. “Fine. But this is the last time.”

She started to reply, but Lorcan hung up before he had to listen to her simpering for another moment.

He turned to face Elide, and she cut him off before he could even try to explain. “You’re really going?”

“I have to, E,” he murmured. “But this is the last time. I promise.”

“That’s what you said you told her the last time.” Elide’s face was full of hurt, and Lorcan hated that he was the cause of it.

“I know, love. But -.”

She cut him off again. “And the time before that.” Elide fixed him with a hard look. “L, you can’t keep doing this. You can’t keep running every time she calls.”

“I know,” he repeated.

Elide rolled her eyes. “If you know, then don’t go. Show her that you aren’t bound to her anymore!” There were tears building in her eyes, and when he tried to reach for her, she pushed him away.

“I already said I’d go.”

A sob tore from her throat at that, but she still wouldn’t let him touch her. “Then go, Lorcan.”

“Elide,” he whispered, trying to find the right words.

She never gave him the chance. “Just fucking go. But know that I might not be here when you get back.”

Lorcan could only stare at her - her words had frozen him on the spot. Sensing his confusion, she added, “I won’t stand for this. So if you want to go, fine. But I want you to know that I might not stay if you choose to walk out that door.”

With that, Elide disappeared into his room, tears spilling down her cheeks. The sound of the lock clicking followed him out the front door.

~*^*~

Running his hands through his hair, Lorcan tilted his head back and stared at the crescent moon hanging in the sky. He’d been sitting on the same park bench for at least four hours, but he couldn’t bring himself to get up and go home.

He was petrified that he would open the door and find that Elide was gone.

He hadn’t even made it to his truck before his phone was buzzing in his pocket with a text from Maeve. He opened it to see a picture of Maeve in barely-there pink lingerie and ivory pumps. She’d sent the caption like what you see - it’s the first of many you’ll see tonight along with it.

He’d stopped in his tracks, feeling like the world’s biggest fool for falling for her bullshit again. A stunt like that meant she and Cairn were fighting and she was hoping to make him jealous when he found out Lorcan had been there.

Pinching the bridge of his nose as he’d tried to get his temper under control, he’d growled into the night air. Dialing her number, he’d started speaking the minute she’d answered, his voice cold. “That’s it, Maeve. I’m done playing this game with you. I should have done this years ago, but I’m doing it now. I won’t keep crawling back to you like some lost little boy. I won’t be bound to you anymore. Don’t call me - we’re done.”

She’d tried to protest, but Lorcan hung up before she could. He’d wanted to run back inside the second he’d slipped his phone in his pocket, but he couldn’t face Elide quite yet.

Instead, he’d made for the park the next block over - the same park he’d taken Elide to on their first date - and that’s where he’d stayed.

Still staring up at the moon, Elide filled his thoughts, and he realized just how long he’d been sitting there when he could have been begging for her forgiveness. He’d just practically leapt to his feet when a beat-up Jeep Cherokee came to a stop in front of him.

Lorcan didn’t have to wait for the driver to get out to know it was Elide.

“Lor!” she cried, sprinting around the front to reach him. “Are you okay?”

He blinked, not believing that she was really standing in front of him. “Elide?” he murmured, breath catching in his throat as she came to stop in front of him. “El, baby?”

She stared up at him, confusion flashing across her face as he just continued to stare at her. “Lorcan,” she said firmly, reaching out to grip his shoulders. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah, I’m fine.” He brushed off the other questions he could see she was desperate to ask with a wave of his hand, reaching out to cup her cheek with the other. “What are you doing here, baby?”

“Well, about thirty minutes after you left,” she started, pulling away from his hand as her face hardened, “I realized I’d never heard your truck leave, and when I saw it was still in the parking lot, I got worried. I tried to call you about thirty minutes ago, but you didn’t answer, so I came looking for you.”

Even though he could tell that she was still furious with him by the tone of her voice and her expression, Lorcan’s heart fluttered in his chest when he realized she’d been worried about him. Then his heart sank when he realized why she was so worried, and the words came pouring out of him. Everything that had happened that night, from the time he’d left his apartment to the moment she’d pulled up in front of him, spilled through his lips without any conscious effort.

“Anyway,” he concluded, his brain finally catching up with his thoughts, “I’m sorry I made you worry, and I’m sorry I didn’t answer your phone. Maeve’s been calling me all night since I told her I was done with her and after the sixth call I just stopped checking.”

Elide gave him a speculative look. “If you told her off four hours ago, why didn’t you just come home? It would have saved me a lot of worrying and you a lot of trouble.”

Sucking a deep breath in through his teeth as he felt tears building behind his eyes, Lorcan found that he couldn’t quite meet her eyes when he said, “I was afraid you wouldn’t be there. Right after I told her what I did, I knew you hadn’t left because I would have seen you, but I just wasn’t ready to face you. And then, the longer I sat on this bench, the more I thought you would be gone when I got home, and I couldn’t face the thought of walking into my apartment and finding that you were gone from my life.”

“Oh, Lorcan,” she sighed, looking like she wanted to say more, but he held up a hand to stop her.

“Elide,” he whispered, finally meeting her eyes as he dropped to his knees in front of her, a single tear spilling out as he took in her hopeful expression before he managed to get them under control. “I am so incredibly sorry for the way I treated you and I what I put you through tonight. I just - Maeve has always had this hold on me, and no matter how hard I tried I could never shake her. Frankly I think it’s because some part of me didn’t want to. At least, not until I had you in my life. Until I thought I might lose you for good, I never realized just how unimportant she was to me. She might have had a hold on me, but you have a hold on my mind, my heart, and my soul. The thought of losing you makes me feel like I’m dying. And I know this doesn’t even begin to make up for it, but I want you to know how sorry I am.”

He’d dropped his head after he finished talking, so he didn’t see when Elide reached out to run her fingers through his hair, though the action was soothing enough that he looked up to meet her eyes once more. “Lorcan,” she murmured, dropping so she was knee-to-knee on the ground with him. “Damn you, love.”

“Erm, why, exactly?”

“Because you make it so hard to be mad at you.” She laughed lightly, but sobered up as she reached out to cup his face. “I know she put you through hell, babe. I know how much of a hold she had on you. I’m sorry that I threatened to leave, but I wanted you to see that you didn’t need her, because I’m always going to be here for you. I wish you would just talk to me about your feelings instead of thinking you have to take on the world alone.”

Lorcan nodded, turning his head to kiss her palm. “I promise I’m going to work on that. I’m going to get better at talking to you and sharing what -.” He cut off as something dawned on him. “Wait, are you saying you forgive me?”

Elide laughed again, although he noticed it was a little watery. “Of course I forgive you, Lor. I love you.”

“I love you too, baby,” he breathed, the tears he’d been trying to hold back for so long finally sliding down his cheeks as he pulled her into his chest and buried his face in her hair. “So much, El. I love you so much.”

They stayed like that for a while, kneeling on the sidewalk and holding each other tight. Lorcan knew that he was beyond lucky to have Elide, especially after the way he’d acted tonight, and he couldn’t help the way he was sobbing into her hair. He figured she didn’t mind too much, given that he could feel his shirt getting damp as she sobbed against his chest. He wanted nothing more than to never let her go, but he felt the way she began shivering as the cool night air finally started to hit her.

Pulling away enough to meet her gaze, he swiped away the tears under his eyes as he asked, “How about we head back to the apartment, curl up on the couch with a bunch of blankets, and binge-watch something on Netflix - whatever you want?”

She nodded up at him, tears still sliding down her cheeks. “That sounds really nice.” Her tears thickened as she started speaking, and Lorcan wiped them away with his thumbs.

Leaning in to press a kiss to her forehead, he scooped her into his arms and carried her to the car, strapping her into the passenger seat. As he climbed into his side, she reached over to tangle their fingers. “Lor?”

“Yeah, love?” he asked, starting her car up and heading for his apartment.

“We still have to talk about this - you know that, right?”

Pressing a kiss to the back of her hand, he made an affirmative noise in his throat. “I know, I know. I was thinking we could do that over dinner tomorrow? I’ll even cook your favorite.”

He glanced over at her, relieved to see that she was smiling. “You’ve got a deal.”

Lorcan nodded, grateful beyond words that Elide was with him and that he hadn’t completely screwed everything up. He knew that, in the future, he would do whatever he needed to do to keep her - his absolutely amazing girlfriend - in his life.

ONE YEAR, EIGHT MONTHS, AND TWENTY-TWO DAYS AGO

Connall threw himself down on the couch in Vesta’s living room, burying his face in his hands as he listened to her angrily throw things around in her room. By the sound of it, she was changing out of the dress she’d been wearing for their date, muffled curses falling from her lips as he heard the thuds of her shoes hitting the floor in her closet.

He was in deep shit, and he knew it.

They’d been together for just over a year now, and he’d learned very early on in their relationship that guys were simply drawn to his girlfriend. He knew she was beautiful beyond compare, and they did, too. She was constantly being hit on no matter where they were, and though she begged him not to be bothered by it, he could never brush it off the way she did.

Tonight had been no different, and Connall had finally had enough. He usually got possessive, pulling her tight against him or kissing her a little inappropriately to show that she was his, but he’d come close to blows with some guy tonight, and Vesta was not happy with him.

Just as that thought crossed his mind, her bedroom swung open and she came barreling through it, eyes narrowed and a scowl on her face. “Connall, what the hell was that back there?”

Though he knew he should just apologize and get it over with, white-hot anger surged through him and he shot to his feet, meeting her halfway across the room. “He practically had his hands all over you, and I’m supposed to just let some guy touch my girl like that?”

“He had one hand on my arm - ONE HAND - and I was in the middle of handling it when you basically threw him across the room!”

Connall huffed at that, stepping forward until he was face-to-face with Vesta, his forehead brushing hers. “He’s lucky that’s all I did.”

“Connall, how many times do we have to have this conversation?” she cried, throwing her hands up in the air as she backed away from him. “I don’t need you to protect me!”

The laughter that poured out of his mouth then was not kind, and the hurt that flickered through her eyes barely registered before his next words were slipping through his lips. “Clearly - since you’re so quick to throw yourself at other guys. I guess I shouldn’t be so quick to protect someone who’s so eager to go.”

Her entire face crumpled. “What?” she whispered, hands falling limply to her sides as she backed away from him.

“You heard me.” Before she could respond, Connall had turned away from her and yanked the front door open. “I think I need some space.”

He heard her calling his name as he walked away, he heard the sobs in her voice, but he couldn’t bring himself to turn around.

So he kept walking.

~*^*~

He was more drunk than he’d been in a very long time.

Connall wasn’t sure of much as he staggered out of the bar he’d been sitting in for the last two hours and the only place he’d been since leaving Vesta’s, but that he was completely certain of. He knew he was in no shape to walk home, and he knew he needed to get a ride.

He also knew that he needed to apologize to Vesta, knew he needed to explain what had made him say all those horrible things to the woman who made his entire world better.

And then he needed to get down on his knees and beg for forgiveness, because his life would mean nothing without her.

Before he could register what he was doing, his phone was pressed to his ear and his heart was breaking all over again when her voice rumbled through the speakers.

“What the fuck do you want?” Her voice was scratchy, and she sounded like she was sniffling.

“V, babe, I really fucked up.”

“And?”

Connall sucked down a deep breath, desperately trying to clear his mind enough that he could get her to come pick him up. “And I know you’re pissed, and you have every right to be, but I’m fucking wasted and can you please come get me? Please baby?”

He heard some muffled choice words directed at him before she answered him. “Fine. But if you put one hair out of line, you can fucking walk.”

~*^*~

Vesta pulled up in front of the bar, gravel flying as she slammed on the brakes in front of him. The glare she cut his way as he climbed in beside her was icy, though he could see how red her eyes were from crying.

As she pulled out of the parking lot, Connall observed her quietly. Though she refused to look at him, he wasn’t shy as he stared over at her. She was still sniffling quietly, and her hands were shaking as they gripped the steering wheel. She was practically curled in on herself, and it was that thought - the idea that his beautiful, strong girlfriend was broken because of him - that sent him over the edge.

His breathing turned to panicked gasps, and sobs were spilling from his lips before he could even register what was happening. “Vesta,” he gasped, reaching for her and gripping her thigh when she moved her arm out of his reach. “Vesta, I’m so sorry. I’m so fucking sorry, baby.”

“Is that all you have to say to me?” Though her voice was cold, it broke on the last word. “That you’re sorry?”

Tears were spilling down his cheeks in earnest now, and he didn’t even care enough to wipe them away. Instead, they curved down over his jaw and dripped onto his jeans, the little wet spots like raindrops against his legs.

“No, baby, that’s not all. I know that’s not enough to make up for what I said - nothing will ever be enough for that. But I need you to know that I’m sorry - I’m so damn sorry - and I didn’t mean any of it. Not one single word.”

“Really?” she cried, tears dripping down her cheeks now. Thankfully, she’d pulled into the spot next to his in front of his apartment, so he wasn’t concerned about her concentrating on the drive. “Because it sounded like you meant it.” Dropping her hands into her lap, Vesta turned to face him, the hurt in her gorgeous eyes gutting him. “You basically said that I’d cheat on you. Do you really think so little of me?”

Reaching for her without even thinking about it, Connall cupped her jaw with one hand, thumb wiping away a single tear when she didn’t flinch away from the touch. “Of course not! You know I think the world of you. It’s myself I don’t think very much of.”

That seemed to catch her off guard. “What?” she whispered, blinking at him in confusion.

“I know that you’d never cheat on me - you’re too good of a person to ever do that. But… well, it’s complicated.” Connall sighed dropping his head back against the window with a bang.

It was Vesta who bridged the gap between them this time, her fingers dancing over his hand before she twined their fingers together. “Talk to me, baby. What’s going on?”

He met her eyes, more tears spilling over as he offered up the most damaged parts of his soul. “I’ve never been the guy that girls wanted to be with. I’m quiet, I’m sarcastic, and I can be a dick. Girls always wanted to be with Fen, and even when they wanted me, they only wanted me because they thought I could get them closer to my brother.”

“Are you trying to tell me you think I’m going to leave you for your brother?”

“No, of course not.” He couldn’t help but let out a watery chuckle at that. “But it wasn’t just Fen. Whoever my friends were at the time - be it high school or college - girls always used me to get closer to them.”

Vesta tugged his hand up to her lips, pressing a gentle kiss to his fingers before she answered him. “I’m so sorry, Con. That’s awful.”

He nodded, the flow of tears slowing. “I know it doesn’t make up for what I said, but I’m hoping it might explain it. Seeing other guys showing an interest in you, it makes me nervous. It makes me feel like I did in high school, watching the girls I liked walk away from me the minute the guy they really wanted showed the slightest bit of interest. I know you don’t need to be protected - you know I know you can handle yourself - and I know you would never do to me what they did, but I just get so afraid that I’ll lose you.”

Vesta gave him a watery smile, a spark of happiness lighting up her eyes as she took in his words. “You’re afraid of losing me?”

“Of course I am. You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me, Vesta. Losing you would absolutely wreck me.”

Vesta practically leapt over the console to get to him, her knees bracing around his hips as she tangled her fingers in his hair. “Oh, Connall,” she breathed, her breath ghosting over his neck.

His own arms banded around her waist, holding her against him like he was afraid to let go as he pressed kisses to her head and temple. “I’m so sorry, my love. Can you ever forgive me?”

“Of course I can,” she murmured, pressing her lips to his neck one more time before she pulled away. “But that doesn’t mean I’m not still angry,” she muttered, flicking his nose and giving him a stern look.

“Understood,” Connall replied, something in his chest easing when he saw the slight smile pulling at the corner of her mouth. “Are we okay?”

“Yeah, babe, we are.” Leaning over to grab the keys from the ignition, she motioned for Connall to get out of the car. “Let’s get you to bed.”

Realizing how tired he was, Connall grinned sleepily up at her as he climbed out of the SUV. “That sounds like a good idea.”

“Yeah, I know it does,” she quipped, taking the hand he offered her as she climbed out after him. “Besides, you’re going to have a wicked hangover in the morning and I’ll enjoy giving you hell about this fight even more then.”

He laughed, though he knew she was serious. Wrapping an arm around her shoulders, he guided her toward his apartment, a relieved smile on his face. “Whatever you want, my love.”

As long as he knew that they would be okay, that they would make it through this, then it really was whatever she wanted. Even if that was to yell at him while he was hungover.

ONE YEAR, SIX MONTHS, AND TWENTY-NINE DAYS AGO

“Gav,” Lin whined, her legs curled underneath her as she perched on the counter, “would you quit worrying about your hair? We’re just going for a run.”

Grinning at his fiancée, Gavriel just winked at her as he continued to smooth out his hair as he pulled it into a bun. She groaned at him, and he couldn’t help the chuckle that escaped his throat. “What’s got you in such a hurry today, love? Like you said, it’s just a run - nothing pressing.”

She shot him a devious little smirk, and he felt his heart flutter in response. “Because,” she murmured, voice low and breathy, “the sooner we get back from our run, the sooner I can join you in the shower.”

Gavriel suddenly found he didn’t care about his hair anymore. “Linnea Sidero,” he said as he stalked toward her, “you will be the death of me.” He came to a stop in front of her, and Lin uncurled her legs so she could wrap them around his waist as he tangled one hand in her hair. His other hand came to rest on the side of her neck, thumb brushing lightly over her jaw as he captured her lips with his.

Using his grip to angle her head, Gavriel kissed her harder, his tongue sweeping into her mouth with a groan. Her hands were resting on his chest, fingers curling against the fabric of his tank top as she moaned into his kiss.

Pulling away with a gasp, he went to rest his forehead against hers when his attention snagged on the open envelope on the counter behind her.

“Babe, what’s the National Archery Conference want?” he gestured to the letter behind her at her confused look.

Lin was a champion archer, though Gavriel had noticed she hadn’t been competing as much recently. She also worked as a mechanic at a garage in town, and though he knew she had been picking up more hours there, he worried she was letting archery slip away because of him - because of their relationship.

“Oh, that,” she breathed. “They’ve invited me to join them for a two-month world exposition of all the champion archers.”

“That’s amazing, love.” Gavriel pressed a kiss to her forehead before grinning down at her. “When do you leave?”

“Well, it starts next month,” she said, not quite meeting his eyes. “But,” she continued, an unreadable emotion flashing in her eyes as she finally met his gaze, “I’m not going.”

“What?” Gavriel spluttered, his hands falling from where they’d been cupping her face as he stumbled back a step. “What do you mean you aren’t going?”

“I mean I’m not going.” Lin shot him a confused look, one eyebrow arching as she reached out to grab his hand. “What’s so hard to understand about that?”

He pulled his hand from hers, choosing instead to scrub it over his face. “No, I understood that perfectly. What I meant was, why aren’t you going?”

“Because it’s two months long, that’s why.” She dropped her hand on the counter behind her, sighing as she looked at him. “I have a job here. I have friends here. You’re here. I don’t want to leave my entire life behind for two months.”

Gavriel just shook his head as his worst feelings were confirmed. All of these thoughts and emotions were swarming his brain, but the only one he could vocalize was, “You have to go.”

“Oh, I have to go?” She was practically shouting now, anger crossing her face as she jumped off the counter. “Who are you to tell me what to do?”

He glared down at her. “I’m your fiance - that’s who I am. And I’m not letting you give up your dreams for me.”

That caught her off guard. All the anger slipped off her features, and a deep sadness filled her eyes as she looked at him. “What are you talking about? What dream am I supposedly giving up?”

“Archery. Being a champion archer. Traveling the world.”

“Gav, what? That’s not -.” Lin broke off as he backed away from her, shaking his head as she reached for him.

“I’m sorry,” he murmured, backing even further away from her. “But I won’t let you ruin everything you’ve worked so hard for. You have to go on this tour. And I - I have to go. I’m sorry.” Even as tears built in her eyes, Gavriel turned away from her, letting himself out the front door and walking away from the woman he loved.

~*^*~

1:48 AM. That’s what time the clock read when Gavriel finally stopped staring at the ceiling long enough to look at it. Groaning, he rolled onto his stomach, burying his face in his pillow as the events of his afternoon whirled around his mind for the millionth time since they’d happened.

He couldn’t believe it. He’d told Lin, the love of his life, the woman of his dreams, that she had to follow her dreams even if it meant leaving him behind. He’d meant every word of it to, but - walking out on her like that? That wasn’t the way he should’ve handled the whole situation, and he knew it.

Rutting gods, but he’d messed this up. Just as that thought, and a hundred others just like it, raced through his head, his phone started ringing on the nightstand. He reached out and answered it without paying attention to who was even calling, too caught up in his thoughts to care.

“Yeah?” he muttered, tears building in his eyes as Lin’s broken-hearted face flashed through his mind again.

“Gav?” the voice on the other end questioned, and he jolted up when he realized it was Lin. “Baby, I need to talk to you.”

He rubbed his eyes, trying to both wake himself up and push the tears away. “Lin, hey, is everything okay?”

“No, it’s not.” Gavriel thought he heard her sniffle through the phone, but he wasn’t entirely sure. “I’m going to talk, and I need you to listen, okay?”

“Of course, love.”

Lin took a deep breath before answering him. “Listen, I know you’re worried about me giving up my dreams for you, but that’s not true. Archery isn’t my dream - it never really was. Yes, I love it, and yeah, being a champion is cool, but it’s just something I do for fun. I like my life just the way it is now, and I’m not giving up my dreams to keep it that way. Okay?”

He nodded, and then realized that she couldn’t see him. “So, archery isn’t your dream?”

She huffed, and he could practically hear her frustration in that single noise. “No, my love, it’s not. In fact, I’m staring at the door of my dream right now.”

“Yeah,” he murmured, interest piqued, “and what is that?”

“Open your door.”

Gavriel didn’t think he’d ever jumped out of bed so fast. Heart racing, he practically sprinted through his apartment, pulling the door open before he’d even hung up the phone.

Lin was standing just on the other side of it, a handful of sunflowers in her hands. She smiled up at him, a small timid thing, and reached one hand out for the strings on his sweats. “You’re my dream, Gav. You, and this life we’re building together, and the future we’re going to have. You are everything I want.”

There was nothing he could do to keep his tears from falling as he reached for, barely remembering to take the flowers from her and set them on the table by his door before he was crushing her against his chest. He could feel her muffled sobs against his chest, his own tears soaking into her hair as he breathed in the scent of her shampoo. “I’m so sorry, baby,” he murmured, pulling back to kiss her forehead. “I’m so sorry and I love you so much.” He choked back a sob then, the awe he felt for the woman in front of him completely filling him. “I just - I just wanted -.”

Lin cupped his jaw in her hands, her thumbs brushing away the tears rolling down his cheeks. “I know, my love. I know. And I love you.” She was crying as she looked up at him, but she was smiling too, and he realized how lucky he was to have her in his life.

Sliding his hands under her thighs, Gavriel hauled her into his arms, her legs bracing around his waist as he held her with one arm. With his free hand, he reached for the flowers, carrying them to the kitchen so he could get them in water.

LIn laughed at him the whole time, since he refused to put her down, but he didn’t care. He’d spent the whole night thinking he’d lost her, and he wasn’t about to let her go anytime soon.

Once the flowers were in water, he made his way to his room, his mind finally calming enough that he could finally feel how tired he was. Gavriel crawled under the covers and situated Lin over his chest, barely giving her time to kick off her shoes in the process.

One hand tangled with his, it didn’t take long for Lin to fall asleep, and the steady rhythm of her breathing soon lulled him into slumber, a peaceful smile on his features as he drifted off.

And that’s that! Don’t worry, not all of the new CW stuff will be this angsty!

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