#ari living that pool life

[sociallyawkwardfoxwriter]

#personal #aranea #ari living that pool life #and she's loving it #got to get her daily pool time in

[astrologydayz]

ASTRO SEXOLOGY NOTES - MIXED🔞❤️

💚 LUST IN CAPRICORN = a person who's turned on by people who's in "control"/or by people who's the perfect match 2 be "in charge" of them - They want that strict "daddy/mommy" adventure. Typically really into being restrained, or being "told" what to do/how to act. Bratty behaviour is def a thing here - trying2 "cross" boundaries, 2 see what's gonna happen - "how far can I go, before I'll get "punished?". They could have been a late bloomer, when it comes 2 sex/sexual things in general - or even their sexual urges/desires could have come around later than most. They can get turned on by tattoos/piercings/tall people) sexually attracted2 "older" people typically/2someone who's experienced in life/or sexually, &knows how to make them cum - how 2 "trigger them", in the best way possible.

💙 LUST IN PISCES = a person who's turned on by people who's "dreamy"/"not really real"/sexually attracted 2 people with "tough lives"/backgrounds/sexually attracted2 artistic/spiritual people - creative people/turned on by people they got an "outta this world connection" with. "Roleplaying"/"performing" - putting on a "show" can be a thing they're really into here with lovers/sexual partners. Can also love having sex/getting sexual in water - like in a swimming pool, hot tub, under a shower. They can get sexually attracted 2 people who's not really who they say they are - they're sexually attracted 2 "dream like personas".

❤️ LUST IN ARIES = a person who's turned on by people who doesn't give a fuck/turned on by brave, but opinionated people/by someone who's not afraid to be themselves/turned on by birthmarks, or scars. They can be really into marks being left behind after sex/after "fooling around" - like bite marks, hickeys, marks on body from rough touching/slapping - marks from sex up against a wall, a table, desk, etc. They typically love impulsive sex/"adventure" sex - if u get them horny while u guys are out in public? U best believe they gon find a way 2 get both of u off quick, cuz ain't no way they're waiting till u guys get home - waiting really isn't their strong suit.

LUST ASTEROID - 4386

VENUS CONJUNCT/SQUARE MESSALINA ASTEROID - 545 IN A MAN'S CHART = a man who can give the idea of something "longer lasting" after sex/getting sexual with people, but he's really only into getting his needs fulfilled. Expert at coming up with fake "promises" - he gives u the idea of love, but typically can't walk the walk, after all that talk. EROS CONJUNCT/SQUARE/QUINCUNX PHOLUS ASTEROID - 5145 = a person who can have trouble with handling their sexual desires - they can get greedy, by trying to fulfil all of their sexual urges/desires, so it typically ends with them "blowing it up" for themselves - they end up "tricking" themselves.

MARS CONJUNCT/SQUARE/QUINCUNX MESSALINA ASTEROID - 545 IN A MAN'S CHART = a man who can't control his sexual urges. He can't get enough, he's insatiable - no matter how much he wishes he could control himself, he can't. It takes years of control, before this man ever learns how to say NO - or learns how 2control himself, sexually. "Teenage hormones" - "been around the block".

JUPITER CONJUNCT/SQUARE LUST = a person who's lust/sexual urges never dies down - there's only one way2 go & that's up. It's crazyyyy, like chill😮‍💨😍 - For real, they can always get it on! I'm amazed by these people! They can 100%feel like they'll never find someone who's just as insatiable as they are.

MARS CONJUNCT/TRINE/QUINTILE FAST ASTEROID - 27719 = a person who can get into sexual relationships pretty fucking fast - people who's just their "type" can show up on their path pretty quickly). Can also show up as quickies ofc, like quick hookups with people, etc.

LUST CONJUNCT MC = a person who's "known" for their "lustful tendencies"/talked about bc of their sexual escapades. They're not afraid of telling people what they're into/what they like sexually either - they can be quite boastful about it actually.

MARS CONJUNCT/TRINE/QUINTILE KISS ASTEROID - 8267 = a person who's typically REALLY into "rough"/wild, heated, passionate make out sessions! Can also show a person having a "need" 2 always involve kissing, when getting sexual with somebody.

MARS CONJUNCT/SQUARE/QUINCUNX NEPTUNE = can show us a person who's really sexual, but it's ALL about fantasising here. They can use most of their sexual energy on fantasising - never really doing whatever it is they're fantasising about. Fantasising/using your imagination a lot to get off/getting off by using erotic books/novels/interactive games, etc.

LUST PERSONA CHART NOTES - 4386🔞👇🏼 SUN CONJUNCT/TRINE MARS IN LUST PERSONA CHART = a person who's sexually attracted 2 “fit looking bodies” - like people who works out a lot, or looks like they do. They're turned on by people who's courageous, passionate, ambitious, & a leader all around - alpha males/females typically. SUN CONJUNCT/TRINE SATURN IN LUST PERSONA CHART = a person who knows exactly what they need, & want sexually. They won't ever do something they're not fully comfortable with - they're out, if they're not with it. They can be very sexually attracted 2 people who's older/more mature than them/can get turned on by people who don't "play around" in life. MOON CONJUNCT/TRINE SATURN IN LUST PERSONA CHART = a person who needs some kind of emotional bond/emotional attachment before getting sexual with somebody. MERCURY CONJUNCT/TRINE MARS IN LUST PERSONA CHAT = can get really turned on from sucking dick/eating pussy/from giving a handjob/from fingering - or it can be them who's really into it, when someone is doing it on them. Can also get really turned on from dirty talking/or by certain voices/accents usually. MARS CONJUNCT/SQUARE/QUINCUNX CHIRON IN LUST PERSONA CHART = sexual trauma/really bad sexual experiences.

JUPITER CONJUNCT/TRINE/QUINTILE KISS ASTEROID - 8267 IN LUST PERSONA CHART = a person who's BIG on kissing 2 get turned on - They can get really horny by just making out, A LOT!

MARS CONJUNCT VERTEX IN LUST PERSONA CHART = fated sexual partners/experiences, baby.

THANKS4READING BABE!!!💋

APPRECIATE U, ALWAYS!💙

#astro notes #astro observations #asteroids #astrology #astrology notes #astro community

[tinselxoxo26]

𝓐𝓼𝓽𝓻𝓸 𝓸𝓫𝓼𝓮𝓻𝓿𝓪𝓽𝓲𝓸𝓷𝓼 𝐼𝑉

𝕡𝕒𝕣𝕥 𝕀𝕀𝕀

[Note: this is for tropical astrology]

❈ Libra moon 🤝 relationship advice consultant, nahh fr they always ended up being a mediator in relationship problems like friendships or love at least once in their life. (I feel like this is a universal experience to all libra moons)

❈ Aries venus have a fear of commitment including friendships, even with an earth sun like a Taurus sun.

❈ Water sign in the 4th house cusp could indicate water themes with your childhood home or childhood in general. For example: you might've took swimming classes in your childhood, lived near a beach/lake/pond/pool, your relatives/siblings/yourself have an incident with things related to water etc.

❈ Mars square IC, I hope y'all are doing okay ❤️ We know that the IC represents childhood & square is not the best aspect to have. When it comes to Mars (aggressive planet) squaring the IC, this could indicate that in your childhood there could be incidents with physical aggressive behaviour with your family like fighting/arguing with your siblings. To the point where you might get scars/bruises from your family members.

❈ Mercury 10H, I'll tell you a little secret, they're everywhere (Snapchat, instagram, tiktok etc.) If you don't see them posting, chances are you're not in their close friend stories on insta. I swear they post everyday with multiple stories throughout the day even during exam seasons 💀. I ain't never seen them not posting. If you see their profile being organised & aesthetic, that's just an illusion hun. They probably have internal chaos on the inside. Their fashion choice *chef's kiss*, model material.

❈ 11H stelliums and their connections with ppl are no joke. They know ppl who are models, doctors, dentists to anyone who's well off. They might have free premium/membership cards or gifts received from those ppl.

❈ Something that I've noticed is that for those sagittarius placements whose grades aren't the best in their early years usually do well than their peers in highschool/University. Sagittarius is involved with higher education so that explains why.

❈ The planets/planet that has the 8H represents what physical problems you have with your body. For example sun 8H: scoliosis, mercury 8H: skin/indigestion problems, venus 8H: kidney problems.

❈ I've read that aquarius/11H placements especially stelliums can attract/attracted to ppl who might be well known in the future. This might be a theory but they might tend to attract 8H/scorpio placements or 2H/taurus placements (maybe even 10H/capricorn placements) cuz those signs deals with money & potential fame.

❈ Leo 4H cusp means that in their childhood they might be spoiled by their parents/caretaker, they might buy "royalty" things like fancy gifts/toys/clothing cuz leo is royalty. Their parents might've took a lot of pictures of them and they might act spoiled too as a child.

❈ Pisces/12H placements please stay away from alcohol, vapes, drugs, cigarettes especially pisces/12H stelliums. This might come naturally to you when you try it and you might get addicted to it.

❈ Cancer placements in personal planets 🤝 angry crier. It's a thing.

❈ Sagittarius placements/Jupiter dom might like the colour green. (idk maybe it's cuz the colour green is associated with luck???)

Masterlist

Welp, this is going to be my final post to announce that I'm going on a small hiatus cuz I'm currently busy with schoolwork. I will come back eventually so dw. My astro asks are still open, I'll just be answering them after my hiatus is over. Goodbye for now 💓💞✨

#tinselxoxo26 #tropical astrology #astrology #astro notes #astrology notes #astro observations #astrology observations #aries venus #virgo rising #virgo ascendant #4th house #aspects #11th house stellium #sagittarius placements #8th house placements #8th house #11th house #cancer placements #pisces placements #12th house stellium #12th house #pisces stellium #sagittarius #jupiter

[seafoamreadings]

week of november 19th, 2023

these are written predominantly for the *rising* signs but they are also intuitively "channeled" enough that they should work for any dominant energy you have! (try your sun if you don't know rising, or more advanced readers can try moon, anywhere you have a stellium, etc and see what works best for you!)

aries: several ingresses to sagittarius occur this week, which is beneficial to all fire signs including you. for you it is about academics, philosophy, and spirituality. live generously, honestly, and as happily as possible.

taurus: activity in late scorpio occurs, heralding the start of sagittarius season. so your relationships shift and morph and change, probably dramatically, but it all is leading you toward the deepest and most pleasurable connections.

gemini: any situationships you are in may well be headed for "a talk" as a pileup oocurs in your 7th house, kicking off new and interesting situations, perhaps including commitments. but don't commit to anything you're not all the way all in about.

cancerians: the entire week is the poignant lead up to a powerful and mostly benevolent full moon. for now, make sure you are willing to adapt to positive changes. sometimes this requires letting go of other things you love. what is coming is better than what has gone.

leo: your ruling luminary, the sun, apollo, is was busy last week and is even busier this week. it all leads up to a full moon which may feel exhausting to you. take plenty of rest and pleasure all week as you go about your activities so that you do not find yourself overwhelmed later on (or now...)

virgo: ceres activity occurs throughout the week. it behooves you to be active in your own life. don't simply let things happen to you. go out there and do what you need + want to do!

libra: it is auspicious to be active in your community. volunteer, house-sit for your neighbors, or just make simple conversation with them to form stronger local bonds. also talk to your siblings and cousins! this is a great time for those sorts of connections, which help you and also them to be stronger individuals at other times.

scorpio: focus shifts from your first to your second house. nurture your pool of resources. that's financially, in your community, regarding time, regarding luxury, everything. exchange, try not to hoard.

sagittarius: times of flux such as this are your wheelhouse and bread and butter. if there is upheaval, let it serve you rather than throw you off center or off track. you know you don't like to stew in old patterns or places too long anyway; move on.

capricorn: leading up to a series of sign changes, a series of sextiles to pluto in your sign occurs. you are in some position of power, although it may be unofficial. use it for good and not evil for cosmic extra credit.

aquarius: you're doing soul stuff, whether you like it or not. pluto heading back for your sign is shadow-work central, and is not afraid of getting its hands dirty turning up muck and even filth. so you have to be brave and bold going forward, but fortunately you have some helpful aspects as you do this psychology on yourself!

pisces: as much as you might like to escape to dreams or a fairy tale land, starting from this week you are cast into the spotlight in some way. try to make it fame you can enjoy, rather than infamy to suffer.

#horoscopes #weekly horoscope #horoscope #weekly horoscopes #astrology #signs #zodiac #aries #taurus #gemini #cancer #leo #virgo #libra #scorpio #sagittarius #capricorn #aquarius #pisces

[nextinline-if]

well now i have to know the game recs

All four of you are lovely. How did you know I wanted to share??? So sweet of you ask ;D

Okay, but really <3 These are in no particular order and I doubt Tumblr will let me list them all, so here go just a few of my favorites. I have a lot of visual novel recs too but I refrained from adding ;D

The King's Hound, @the-kingshound- What's not to love? It lives rent-free in my head and I love Arthur and Yniol. <3

Novaturient, @kalorphic- uhm NOAH that's all I have to say about that. I always wanted to be a spy <3

Water to Blood, @veirsewrites - Arlo and Eddie <3 yes, I am a badass vampire nightclub owner!!

Crown of Exile, @ramonag-if - Prince Irus has me simping. That's my man OKAY??

Everything Is Blue, @everythingisblue-if- Aryn, why?? Why have you made it so hard for me to pick between the scrupulous brothers Simon and Lane? WHY. I CAN'T. SOMEONE HELP.

The Operative: Fires of Revolution, @theoperativeif- UHM excuse me. No one touches Ari. Ari is MINE. also, I love sci-fi.

Some Sword / Some Play - short smutty IF. That's all I'm going to say about that :) - on itch.io

Shepherds of Haven, @shepherds-of-haven- Blade, and Chase have me in a CHOKEHOLD.

When Life Gives You Lemons, @when-life-gives-you-lemonssss- everyone simping over MC? Yep, sounds like the perfect dream. Plus, I have a house with a pool and I can screw date my boss <3

Vendetta, @vendetta-if- Ash <3 like, I am here for vengeance and Ash.

A Court of Serpents, @acourtofserpents- yes, I am going to romance Prince Ryzan. Hate me and then love me <3 gotta love getting bullied - passionate!!

Defiled Hearts: The Barbarian, @defiledheartsblog- Marcus can destroy me any day. I love Ancient history so this setting is chef's kiss, too.

Mind Blind, @mindblindbard- I'm playing for most of the ROs. But Grayson? hot damn...I will eat his burnt chocolate chip cookies EVERY TIME.

The Abyssal, @theabyssal- Sol <3 I want to romance every version of Sol. Playing as Death and getting vengeance is so satisfying. The writing is sooooo freaking good.

Adoriel's Tears, @adoriels-tears-if - Sage :) the game's premise is so interesting and unique! Refreshing.

Unwilling Souls, @unwilling-souls-if- Crescent? Trying to kill me? Flirting with me? heyyyy how are you doing?? but also Xander!

Frostbite, @frostbite-if- this one isn't out yet BUT I'm 100% romancing Heidi. Alexis too <3 I am clumsy with no skill but my MC is going to be a great lil figure skater!!

Bacchanal, @bacchanal-if - this one isn't out yet either an adult game I can't wait to play <3 I'm looking at Fox, red flag Butterfly, red flag Edward for a love triangle and of course red flag Univinted Guest <3

So many more but these will do for now! Thanks for indulging me LMAO <3

And there are many, many more <3

#if recs #some of my favorite games #vi's recs #i love yall lol

[emprexxluxaic]

ᰋ ׅ࣪ ꒰ who is your future husband ♡︎ a short reading ꒱

⠀ׅ ♡⠀࣪ emprexxluxaic ⸺ your angel ׅ ࣪ 𝅄

──⠀۪ ఌ︎ ۫ 𝚙𝚊𝚒𝚍 𝚛𝚎𝚊𝚍𝚒𝚗𝚐𝚜 ୨୧ ( 𝚊𝚟𝚊𝚒𝚕𝚊𝚋𝚕𝚎 )

ᴾᴵᴸᴱ ᴼᴺᴱ ᪶ ᴾᴵᴸᴱ ᵀᵂᴼ

⏝ִ︶⏝ִ︶⏝ִ︶⏝ִ︶⏝ִ︶⏝

A PURPLE ICING CUPCAKE & CHERRY ON TOP

⏜ ︵⊹︵ ⏜ ︵ ୨୧︵ ⏜ ︵⊹︵ ⏜

OMGG YOUR FS PILE 1 IS ATTRACTIVE .He might came from different background/country or vice versa.They're intellegent and knows how to take incharge being a leader,your FS might likes math as well(tbh you might hate math or likes it too). He is observant person especially to people around them. He might be a gang/frat leader whom proclaim as a bad kid at school(Theyre kind'a cocky too) but don't hate them that much maybe there's a reason why they act like this,he may face struggles in life or feel betray by a friend whom they trust the most. He may work in military , police officer , lawyer , chef , or teacher/proffessor. Your FS might live in city or rural area/urban or vice versa. A big home where gathering is held especially in living room & pool area or this is your favorite area of your home. Kitchen area is special to him,he may likes to cook and cook for you when you both are together. He likes it when are things vintages.He might own a car and it's color red and a camera.Might interested in photography likes to take picture the momentum of you together.He likes to travel and likes beaches when the waves are wild and loud.He is talented person and good at sports like golf or that's his hobby.Likes to wear jewelries(piercings & rings) and you will notice it too.When you first meet him you will sense the aura of ceo and very well off person(lol why i imagining a bad boy & ceo type to your FS pile 1).He will the first one who will have a crush on you or vice versa. A family oriented person and might take your family in farm dufing sundays .He will be the one who will fetch and drop your children in school or school/university where both of you will meet.Possible to have 2 children(1 boy & girl).He's just cool when you mad at him lol.They love pets & might own a cat or a rabbit.Lastly if you are 22yrs or younger there is possibility of getting older spouse or he is more mature than you.

" a memory to create"

"you are my queen & i am you knight"

"you gave me reason to live happily"

extra messages: 2036-2040, europe , east , concert, dark / blond hair , blue or brown eyes , color red , yellow , brown , think & thin lips , majority of who choose pile 1 will get olive skin , summer , spring , fire signs( aries,sagittarius,leo) earth signs(taurus,virgo,capricorn) , A , L , J , T , D , N , Z , I , S , X , H ,R , F , P , Y

⠀♡⃝ ࣪ ۪ છ۪ to support and donate 𓂂 ׄׄ ᘡ 𝅄 to leave a tip

♡︎ ◦ യ ﾟ꒰˚｡ masterlist : other pick a card readings ۫ ⋆

⏝ִ︶⏝ִ︶⏝ִ︶⏝ִ︶⏝ִ︶⏝

DEAR MY FAIRY PURPLE SHOP

⏜ ︵⊹︵ ⏜ ︵ ୨୧︵ ⏜ ︵⊹︵ ⏜

HI MY DEAR PILE 2 YOUR FS IS SOMEONE KIND-HEARTED AND FAIR PERSON . He likes to gave good advices.He live in city/rural area,in village,(building)that has big backyard ,somewhere cold or have winter country especially in EUROPE . The majority of the reading their FS is someone from different country the the rest are same country.He face struggles and difficulties and even loss of someone(it's a woman)before becoming on what kind of person he is right now.He likes to support his friends but they betray him.He may have a new business(business minded person i see)For some reason he maybe a wealthy person or financially stable.Likes to do some errands like gaving you sweet messages.Can be cocky sometimes.He likes to playgolf and watch TV often.He likes old music/songs or vice versa.He have masculine body/aura.He works in overseas/hospital and likes to watch the sunset/dawn.He likes to wear cap/hat and shorts.He likes pet and might own a cat that is color black.He likes/want to travel and explore the world.He likes to take down notes and likes to fix his scheduled.Soulmates energy here.You and your FS might have twins(girl) or will adopt, both will elope n the wedding will be in church.The relationship will have alot of fun and adventure that makes both of you happy.He likes to cuddles/hugs you alot and misses you when your not around.This is the end of your reading my dear pile 2 and hope y'all enjoy it.

"I'll bring the luck with me"

"I stopped and look closely"

"my heart is whenever you are"

extra messages: 2024-2026, younger ,5 , europe ,middle east , east ,antique , coffee , contact lenses , helping , blonde hair with highlights , long hair , monsoon , waiting , violet/brown/yellow color , fire signs(aries,sagittarius,leo) , spring , I , S , X , G , U , W , C , O , H , R

⠀♡⃝ ࣪ ۪ છ۪ to support and donate 𓂂 ׄׄ ᘡ 𝅄 to leave a tip

♡��� ◦ യ ﾟ꒰˚｡ masterlist : other pick a card readings ۫ ⋆

#future spouse #pick an image #pac reading #pick a card readings #pick a pile #tarot reading #pick a card reading #future spouse pick a card #pick a card #spotify

[virginiadre]

Composite Aries:

Having thoroughly analyzed many composite charts over the years, Steven and Jodie came to the conclusion how planets (and houses) behave with regarding to the signs and aspects. Here I'm taking the opportunity to write down about just the big three placements in aries for you guys, in accordance to the Forrests' research.

Sun in Aries: Adventure, intensity, a sense of living passionately and close to the edge. To be true to themselves, this couple must be fearless—or, more accurately, they must never let fear make a decision for them. It isn’t actually necessary that they risk their necks so dramatically, but they do need the kind of stretching that comes from taking risks together. Traveling to places that frighten them a bit could be on the list. Sports might figure positively in their life together, including hiking, biking or hang-gliding.

If on the other hand they go down the coward’s road, then the Arian energy devolves into pettiness and bickering, and a mood of endless, undefined stress in the relationship. It’s critical to remember that, while intimate courage is really the key, its development must be supported by a rough-and-ready, adventurous attitude toward their life together in the world. That’s the foundation; the higher ground is not only a lot more satisfying but also fun.

Moon in Aries: sharing the warrior’s heart; invoking the pioneer, survivor or daredevil. However timid and retiring they may be as individuals, the happiness of their union is fed by adventures great and small. They thrive on challenges, testing their limits and healthy competition - the 'other' party instead of each other. Their home may be filled with "spoils of war" (trophies, a pool, bicycles etc).

Poorly placed, this luminary starts pushing against itself. Humor turns to sarcasm. Grudges become feuds. Bickering escalates into all-out vendettas. When all that vibrant energy is directed consciously instead and the heart of the relationship is fed, these two can not only have a lot of fun, they can experience a profound and growing loyalty to one another. Having faced foes together, each partner will know the mate is a good person to have at his or her back in a fight. For warriors, there isn’t much higher praise.

Ascendant in Aries: Whatever inner lights illuminate the secret world of this couple, those lights blaze into the world through fire engine red filters. Together, they radiate confidence and pluck. One wisely senses that this team would make a better friend than enemy. What we are picking up here is not hostility; it’s more like a simple potential for formidability. This couple needs to learn to face challenges together with a level of trust in each other developed eventually.

The road to attaining that feeling of naturalness and smoothness is a little more challenging than it might be otherwise. Flowers and poetry are less effective here. So put them aside, and strap on those boots, sunglasses, and backpacks since Cupid is waiting out there for you. Be attentive to Mars, your composite chart ruler, who will show you where this passionate bonding is specially suited to the realities of this couple.

~Skymates 2: The Composite Chart, by Steven Forrest & Jodie Forrest

#composite chart #astrology observations #astro notes #steven forrest #astrology #aries sun #aries moon #aries rising

[bi4bihankking]

The Murderbot Diaries Summary:

In a corporate-dominated space-faring future, planetary missions must be approved and supplied by the Company. For their own safety, exploratory teams are accompanied by Company-supplied security androids. But in a society where contracts are awarded to the lowest bidder, safety isn’t a primary concern. On a distant planet, a team of scientists is conducting surface tests, shadowed by their Company-supplied ‘droid--a self-aware SecUnit that has hacked its own governor module and refers to itself (though never out loud) as “Murderbot.” Scornful of humans, Murderbot wants is to be left alone long enough to figure out who it is, but when a neighboring mission goes dark, it's up to the scientists and Murderbot to get to the truth.

Aristotle and Dante Discover the Secrets of the Universe Summary:

Aristotle is an angry teen with a brother in prison.

Dante is a know-it-all who has a unique perspective on life.

When the two meet at the swimming pool, they seem to have nothing in common. But as the loners start spending time together, they develop a special friendship - the kind that changes lives and lasts a lifetime. And it is through this friendship that Ari and Dante will learn the most important truths about the universe, themselves and the kind of people they want to be.

#the murderbot diaries #murderbot #martha wells #aristotle and dante discover the secrets of the universe #aristotle and dante #benjamin alire sáenz #lgbt books #lgbt literature #queer books #queer literature #lgbt #lgbtq #lgbtqia #poll #bookblr #booklr #books #literature #queer lit

[astrologys-the-life]

My Astrology observations: Aries edition

Every Aries sun express themselves very differently and they don’t have as many consistent themes compared to other signs. That is because they often have very strong interests or hobbies, each individual will have different likes , hobbies or interests. Therefore, depending on what they like, those topics will be emphasized.

For example there might be an Aries who likes hockey and another Aries who enjoys cooking. The One who likes hockey will emphasize that as a part of their personality by wearing sports jerseys everyday and often going to games multiple times within a week. On the other hand the aries who enjoys cooking might enjoy partaking in cooking competitions and watching cooking shows every night. Although they are very different personalities, they both strongly show off their interests. Which is why it is harder to find consistent themes with Aries suns since each one has different interests.

Overall Aries suns are very high energy, social people who can make long lasting genuine connections. They do have a tendency to be immature or childish when they are around loved ones, they aren’t childish in a toxic way, but more in a competitive way. Meaning they might want everything their friends have, or may get jealous if they didn’t get something their siblings have. This is often because Aries wants to feel special and important, because the people in their lives mean a lot to them. They sometimes need extra validation or attention from the people they love, the people in their lives mean everything to Aries and they will always make sure to have their back. If you’re looking for loyalty, then Aries would be your perfect match.

Aries moons are one of the most common placements I’ve experienced within my lifetime as I’ve probably had more than 10+ long term friendships with Aries moons.

Aries moons have a dominating energy about them, this type of energy isn’t everyone’s cup of tea which can cause issues within their personal relationships, whether family, friend, romantic. This is something that Aries moons will get better with accepting over time. Aries moons often take a long time to mature and develop due to selfishness & immature thinking. When underdeveloped they often have bad attitudes towards the people that love them, they may also expect prince/princess treatment from loved ones leading them to have a spoiled/rotten way of seeing things. They also are extremely volatile if they do not get their way, they will stoop extremely low and expect no consequences for their actions as well. If there are consequences to their actions they often times can not handle the reciprocated energy. They may have a tendency to bully the people in their lives if it means they will get what they want, and aren’t afraid to step on others to get their way. They have a harder time with expressing sadness or deeper emotions which leads to a lot of anger being expressed especially through teenage years.

A developed Aries moon is much different than an underdeveloped Aries moon. They are the life of the party, they can make even the most mundane tasks a bunch of fun. They are risk takers who push beyond their boundaries and the boundaries of others who are capable of evolving themselves to higher levels of life, money, experiences. They also are the most honest friend you’ll ever find, they’ll make sure to tell you if your breath stinks or if your hairs a mess. They don’t mind giving a little tough love, which is such a fresh of breath air. They are very open about what their thoughts and opinions are, so you will always know where they stand. No questioning with them. They enjoy close friendships and prioritize their friends, they love going on adventures with their friends whether it’s to the beach, the pool, a party, or the park they always make sure to have a good time and love making the most out of their memories. They are reliable and creative people full of lots of love. They will always stand up for their friends, and make sure to protect them if it’s ever needed, However, since Aries moons take longer to develop they may not reach this point of healthy development until much later in their lives, usually around their late 20’s or early 30’s.

Having an Aries mars is a blessing as long as the energy is used correctly, Aries mars is such a strong placement that it needs a healthy outlet or else it can be self destructive. Aries mars needs to channel their energy into energizing activities that require physical movement that will benefit them such as weight lifting, dancing, cooking, sports, etc. they need these healthy outlets because they have large quantities of energy with good stamina that must be burned off, especially since not everyone can keep up with such high energy. If not channels in a healthy way this can lead to them being annoyed easily by others, creating unnecessary arguments, starting fights for fun, because there is so much strong energy that isn’t being used properly it will linger around and cause unnecessary harm to others. Aries mars can go very far since they don’t burn out easily, this can get them very ahead in whichever area of life that they want to put their all into. Anything is possible with this placement. As long as their hotheadedness doesn’t get in the way, if an Aries mars is ever mad it’s definitely intense but it will leave just as quickly as it came so don’t expect people with this placement to hold grudges over silly things. However, if you made a huge mistake with an Aries mars they will declare war and they won’t be backing down until they feel justified.

Aries mercuries are hard to come across, they enjoy talking with many different types of people. They are very straightforward with their thinking and mostly see things black or white. They don’t think much of the consequences of their words so don’t be surprised if they accidentally hurt your feelings. Don’t expect much of an apology either because they mean what they say. They are good conversationalist and the convos are never dry with them. Lots of fun, lots of laughs.

Anyone with an Aries Venus may struggle within their personal relationships, family, friends and romantic relationships because they always make sure to put themselves first. Although prioritizing yourself isn’t a bad thing, but when it comes to identifying other peoples wants and needs they may choose to ignore the other persons needs/wants/ expectations from the relationship since they are so focused on themselves. They may feel as if they don’t owe the other person anything, and that the other person shouldn’t expect anything from them. They have a bad tendency to prioritize themselves over their relationships/friendships. This is often due to fear of true intimacy, being intimate and close with others may be scary and uncomfortable for them so they’d rather avoid it all together by making sure to focus on themselves. Whatever relationships they choose to have with others will force them to face themselves in ways they may not want to, so the relationships may not be long lasting. They may prefer surface level relationships that don’t dive too deep. If they choose to get over these fears they make very protective loyal and loving partners who would move mountains for your happiness, however this may take quite sometime as it really depends on what level of comfortability they are within themselves.

Aries risings are very lucky people, all areas of life for them tend to be easier in various ways. They may have been born with a talent, born with wealth, born with beauty, whatever it is they can have easy lives if they choose. Depending on their character this can make them really lazy since life is easier for them, it can cause lazy tendencies. If used positively they can make quite an impact on the world and do something really big with their lives. An example of an Aries rising would be Rihanna, she made a huge impact on the makeup industry by adding diversity for various shades of makeup skintones from dark to light changing the makeup industry forever by making it more inclusive. Overall Aries risings hold quite some power!

Please keep in mind these are my observations based off of my personal experience. Everyone is different ant these may not apply to you. Thank you so much for taking the time to read my post :)

#aries #astrology #aries sun #aries moon #aries mars #aries mercury #aries venus #astrology observations #astrology side of tumblr #astrological signs #zodiac sign #zodiac #astrology signs #aries rising

[felysline]

adonis vause.

: the dynamic nigerian-canadian force who's powering through nba as a power forward for the boston celtics, is now greeting you.

adonis gregory vause was born on march 25th, 1999, in toronto, canada, to benjamin vause and amancia clarke. his skills were honed at syracuse university in new york, where he committed to the syracuse orange, before transitioning to the professional realm by clocking in 172 games over four seasons with stints at the toronto raptors, fort wayne mad ants, and indiana pacers.

he's one of the proud representatives of canada too. contributing to the national team's success, he includes securing a silver medal at the 2017 fiba americas u18 championship in chile, while earning him a spot on the atlantic coast conference (acc) all-freshman team, making him known globally.

now, residing in boston, massachusetts, adonis has been lighting up the scoreboard, averaging an impressive 17 points over the past five weeks across 16 matches, proving himself as a valuable asset to the celtics lineup. with his blend of skill, versatility, and determination, he continues to soar to new heights in the nba and live his life as the person he wants to be.

* cardwords: active, ambitious, aries, athletic, close-knitted, enfp, shy, street-smart, well-mannered.

* frequently seen out and about around ailes blanches private pool, auerbach center, and aquila del sole lounge.

#lys_whitfield #intro: whitfield #itsadonis #*adonis is originally by @sunnisani <3

[richincolor]

[The six images above are the covers of the books that are featured in the post and are described below after each of the titles.]

Disability Pride Month

For Disability Pride Month we gathered a few titles that we have enjoyed and/or hope to read in the near future. If you know of others that shouldn't be missed, please let us know. 

The Secret Summer Promise by Keah Brown Levine Querido [Cover is painted and shows three young people sitting near water with a bright sun up above. They're wearing shorts and have long dark hair.]

THE BSE (Best Summer Ever) LIST!

1. Blueberries 2. Art show in ShoeHorn 3. Lizzo concert 4. Thrift shop pop-up 5. Skinny Dipping at the lake house 6. Amusement Park Day! 7. Drew Barrymarathon 8. Paintball day

Oh, and ….

9. Fall out of love with Hailee

Andrea Williams has got this. The Best Summer Ever. Two summers ago, she spent all her time in bed, recovering from the latest surgery for her cerebral palsy. She’s waited too long for adventure and thrills to enter her life. Together with her crew of ride-or-die friends, and the best parents anyone could ask for (just don’t tell them that), she’s going to live it up.

There’s just one thing that could ruin it: Her best friend, Hailee, finding out Andrea’s true feelings. So Andrea WILL fall out of love with Hailee – even if it means dating the cute boy George who keeps showing up everywhere with a smile.

Do we want Andrea to succeed? No! Does she? We’re not telling!

Breathe and Count Back from Ten by Natalia Sylvester Clarion Books [Cover has a young woman swimming in water. She is wearing a bikini and there are scars visible on her back.]

In this gorgeously written and authentic novel, Verónica, a Peruvian-American teen with hip dysplasia, auditions to become a mermaid at a Central Florida theme park in the summer before her senior year, all while figuring out her first real boyfriend and how to feel safe in her own body.

Verónica has had many surgeries to manage her disability. The best form of rehabilitation is swimming, so she spends hours in the pool, but not just to strengthen her body.

Her Florida town is home to Mermaid Cove, a kitschy underwater attraction where professional mermaids perform in giant tanks . . . and Verónica wants to audition. But her conservative Peruvian parents would never go for it. And they definitely would never let her be with Alex, her cute new neighbor.

She decides it’s time to seize control of her life, but her plans come crashing down when she learns her parents have been hiding the truth from her—the truth about her own body.

The Luis Ortega Survival Club by Sonora Reyes Balzer + Bray [Cover shows four brightly dressed young people in a narrow passageway or hallway. They are leaning in towards each other to pose together for the picture.]

Ariana Ruiz wants to be noticed. But as an autistic girl who never talks, she goes largely ignored by her peers, despite her bold fashion choices. So when cute, popular Luis starts to pay attention to her, Ari finally feels seen.

Luis’s attention soon turns to something more, and they have sex at a party—while Ari didn’t say no, she definitely didn’t say yes. Before she has a chance to process what happened and decide if she even has the right to be mad at Luis, the rumor mill begins churning—thanks, she’s sure, to Luis’s ex-girlfriend, Shawni. Boys at school now see Ari as an easy target, someone who won’t say no.

Then Ari finds a mysterious note in her locker that eventually leads her to a group of students determined to expose Luis for the predator he is. To her surprise, she finds genuine friendship among the group, including her growing feelings for the very last girl she expected to fall for. But in order to take Luis down, she’ll have to come to terms with the truth of what he did to her that night—and risk everything to see justice done.

Disability Visibility Adapted for Young People edited by Alice Wong Delacorte Press [Our review] [The cover has several geometric shapes and bright colors on it along with the title.]

The seventeen eye-opening essays in Disability Visibility , all written by disabled people, offer keen insight into the complex and rich disability experience, examining life's ableism and inequality, its challenges and losses, and celebrating its wisdom, passion, and joy.

The accounts in this collection ask readers to think about disabled people not as individuals who need to be “fixed,” but as members of a community with its own history, culture, and movements. They offer diverse perspectives that speak to past, present, and future generations. It is essential reading for all.

Something More by Jackie Khalileh Tundra [The cover shows three students in uniform near a school sign. One is standing in front and the other two people are sitting on top of the sign.]

Fifteen-year-old Jessie, a quirky loner obsessed with the nineties, is diagnosed as autistic just weeks before starting high school. Determined to make a fresh start and keep her diagnosis a secret, Jessie creates a list of goals that range from acquiring two distinct eyebrows to getting a magical first kiss and landing a spot in the school play. Within the halls of Holy Trinity High, she finds a world where things are no longer black and white and quickly learns that living in color is much more fun. But Jessie gets more than she bargained for when two very different boys steal her heart, forcing her to go off-script.

Unbroken: 13 Stories Starring Disabled Teens edited by Marieke Nijkamp Farrar, Straus and Giroux [This cover features two people hugging with their eyes closed on the cover. One has long hair and the other has very closely cut hair on one side with longer hair on the top. The one with short hair has a cane in one hand.]

This anthology explores disability in fictional tales told from the viewpoint of disabled characters, written by disabled creators. With stories in various genres about first loves, friendship, war, travel, and more, Unbroken will offer today's teen readers a glimpse into the lives of disabled people in the past, present, and future.

The contributing authors are awardwinners, bestsellers, and newcomers including Kody Keplinger, Kristine Wyllys, Francisco X. Stork, William Alexander, Corinne Duyvis, Marieke Nijkamp, Dhonielle Clayton, Heidi Heilig, Katherine Locke, Karuna Riazi, Kayla Whaley, Keah Brown, and Fox Benwell. Each author identifies as disabled along a physical, mental, or neurodiverse axis―and their characters reflect this diversity.

#young adult lit #disability pride month

[0710studios]

MGA KARAKTER. jeno x fem!reader

TAGS. angst, smut, arranged marriage!au, marriage of convenience!au, taguan ng anak!au (di namin alam kung ano english nyan)

BILANG NG MGA SALITA. 5.4k (WOW DIBA TAPOS PART 1 PA LANG YAN)

MGA BABALA. profanities, fingering, nipple sucking, unprotected sex (tangina ibalot niyo ang dapat ibalot!!!!!), unexpected/accidental pregnancy (kaya nga taguan ng anak eh), pregnancy (pota malamang ahahfhhffhfh), parehong mataas pride ni y/n at jeno

CHIKA NG ADMINS. wow tangina ito na ata pinakamahabang nasulat namin tapos may part 2 pa!!! ano kayo rebisco?!?! may pasobra dahil special ka!??@ chour deins namin alam kung kelan mapopost 'yung part 2 kasi may pasok na kami potangina sagabal sa pagsusulat talaga 'yang pag-aaral na 'yan dejk HAHAHAHAH

HILING NI ANON. jeno taguan ng anak au na may slight angst (HAHAHAH SORRY NDE NASUNOD XD BAWI KAMI SA PART 2)

JENO LEE, THE TRUST FUND GUY.

hindi kayo arranged marriage ni jeno dahil sa mga magulang niyo, arranged marriage kayo dahil kailangan ni jeno na masecure ang trust fund niyang galing sa lolo niya. it happened so quickly, lasing kayo pareho, the stranger proposed to you, you accepted, and isang pirma lang galing sa kaibigan niyang lawyer— you woke up the next day as y/n lee and in bed with jeno, in a hotel somewhere in the city faraway from where you live. kinailangan mo pa ng explanation nun mula kay jeno, kung bakit pareho kayong may suot na wedding ring at bakit may best wishes banner sa loob ng kwarto niyo. 

the contract he handed you a few hours after you woke up said that this marriage will only last for a year, na kailangan mong mag-move in kasama siya sa iisang bubong, na kailangan mong maging present sa mga pupuntahan niyang events nandoon ang pamilya niya— lalong lalo na ang lolo niya. after nun, he will get his hundred million dollar worth of trust fund and he’ll give you a reasonable amount of money once the contract ends. sa hirap ng buhay, between 9-5 jobs and part time jobs na pinapasukan mo para lang mabigyan ng extra money ang parents mo, wala kang choice kung hindi tanggapin ito. isang taon lang naman eh, what do you have to lose after that?

pero sa isang taon na ‘yun, madalas umiiwas sa’yo si jeno. sa isang araw, bihira na ‘yung isang beses mo siyang masulyapan dahil madalas itong nasa opisina at iniiwan ka sa bahay niyo. nagtatrabaho ka pa rin, 9-5 p.m., bumibisita ka sa mga magulang mo tuwing may extra kang pera pero hindi mo masabi sa kanila na kasal ka na. hindi rin naman sila maniniwala dahil buong buhay mo, wala ka namang pinapakilalang lalaki sa kanila. biglang nagbago ang lahat nang umuwi kayo ni jeno galing sa birthday ng lolo niya, malapit nang matapos ang kontrata niyo, isang buwan na lang at tapos na lahat nang ‘to. umuwi kayo pareho ng lasing at… well, libog. halos isang taon kayong walang dilig dahil iniingatan ni jeno ang sarili niyang madawit sa mga eskandalo na baka maging rason pa kung bakit mauudlot ang trust fund niya.

jeno unzipped your dress effortlessly, letting it pool on your feet as he guided you to your bed. humiwalay lang si jeno sa pagkakahalik sa’yo para maghubad ng damit, sa mga naging bakasyon niyo ni jeno kasama ang pamilya niya, alam mong maganda ang katawan nito dahil madalas rin siyang pumupunta sa gym. jeno pushed you on your bed, asking you to lift your hips para matanggal niya ang suot mong panty, nang matanggal niya ito, tinapon niya ‘to somewhere sa loob ng kwarto kasunod ng bra mo.

hindi ka naman virgin, in fact, active ang sex life mo bago pa dumating si jeno sa buhay mo. pero dahil kinasal ka sa kanya, isang taon kang walang dilig at tigang. pumatong si jeno sa’yo at naramdaman mo ang tigas ng ari niya sa exposed mong puke, ramdam na ramdam mo ito kahit na may boxer na namamagitan sa gitna. “you want this, baby?” tanong niya sa labi mo, “sabi mo kanina, isang taon ka na walang dilig.” pumikit ka dahil ramdam mo ang init ng hininga ni jeno sa mukha mo, hindi ka makasagot dahil parang nawawalan ka ng boses kaya tumango ka. “use your words, misis”

“y-yes, jeno” mahina mong sabi na nagpangisi sa asawa mo, “please, fuck me”

“whatever you want, misis”

humiwalay si jeno sa mukha mo at binaba ang sarili hanggang sa dibdib mo, ang isang kamay niya ay binibilog ang isang utong mo, ang isa naman ay nasa bibig niya. bumitaw si jeno sa pagkakahawak niya sa isang suso mo, nilipat ang kamay na ito sa gitna ng mga hita mo para paghiwalayin ang labi ng puke mo. napakagat labi ka dahil nagpasok ng hindi isa, pero dalawang daliri si jeno sa loob. he was curling his fingers inside, trying to find the sweet spotng to find your sweet spot. it only took him seconds until you were writhing under him kaya napahawak ka sa buhok niya, “jeno, oh my g-god, dyan lang…” ungol mo, kinagat ni jeno ang utong mo bago ilayo ang sarili niya sa’yo at halikan ka muli sa labi. “jeno, lalabasan na ‘ko… f-faster…”

unfortunate you, inalis ni jeno ang daliri niya sa loob mo. napailing ka dahil, ayun na eh. andun na tapos inalis pa niya. humiwalay si jeno sa’yo at bumaba sa kama, kala mo tapos na kayo, and there was a part of you that was disappointed nung bumukas at sumara ang pinto. sighing, inayos mo ang sarili mo at nagtaklob ng kumot. ayun na sana eh, kaso mukha ayaw ata talaga ni jeno. okay lang ‘yan, isang buwan na lang, y/n. malaya ka na ulit. sabi mo sa sarili mo at pumikit, pero agad mong minulat ang mata mo dahil bumukas muli ang pinto.

“anong akala mo, tapos na ‘ko sa’yo?” malamig na sabi nito, lumingon ka sa pinto at nakitang may bitbit siyang tuwalya at isang baso ng tubig. “tanggalin mo ‘yang kumot mo, bukaka. bilis.” utos nito, agad mong inalis ang kumot na nakataklob sa katawan mo at bumukaka. nagtanggal ng boxers si jeno bago sumampa sa kama. hawak hawak ang mga hita mo, pumwesto siya sa gitna. ang laki niya, tangina. naglalaway ka sa lalaking nasa harap mo, taas-babang kinukuskos ang ulo ng tite niya sa basa mong puke, nang-aasar pa na pinapasok ang ulo at biglang ilalabas. you moaned his name quietly, and hearing you moan like that pushed his buttons. ang mga kamay niyang nakahawak kanina sa hita mo, nasa balakang mo na at mahigpit ang pagkakakapit niya dito, bumabaon ang mga kuko sa balat mo.

diniin mo ang ulo mo sa unan, nakahawak ang mga kamay sa comforter na nasa ilalim mo. “jeno, fuck, bilisan mo lang” ungol mo, gaya ng sabi mo, binilisan ni jeno ang pagbayo niya. kada pasok ng tite niya sa puke mo, nararamdaman niya ang ka-sikipan nito kaya dumadaing siya. “jeno… lalabasan na ‘ko”

binitawan ni jeno ang isang side ng balakang mo at nilipat ito sa puke mo, rubbing your clit as fast as his hips were moving. the sensation you were feeling were on the next level, you’ve never experienced pleasure like this before dahil ang mga ex mo naman ay hindi ganun ka-galing sa kama pero pwede na. jeno was a beast— sa business at sa kama. hindi ka na nagtataka kung bakit maraming babae ang humahabol sa kanya, magaling pala talaga siya sa kama.

“jeno—!” ungol mo, you finally reached your orgasm, but jeno still hasn’t. hindi rin niya tinitigilan ang tinggil mo, kaya naman nanginginig na ang buong katawan mo. para kang kiti-kiti sa ilalim ni jeno. “jeno please…”

“onti na lang, misis… malapit na ‘ko” sagot nito, at muling binaba ang sarili niya sa dibdib mo at nag-umpisang dumede. habang tumatagal, bumabagal ang pagbayo ni jeno, mukhang malapit na siyang labasan dahil nararamdaman mo ang pagkislot ng tite niya sa loob mo. “tangina… ang dami ata” sabi ni jeno, mabagal ang pagbayo at naglalabas ng tamod ang tite niya sa loob mo.

ilang minuto kayong nakapwesto ng ganun ni jeno, walang kumikibo at nakapatong lang ang ulo niya sa dibdib mo. hindi niya inaalis ang sarili niya sa loob mo, at nakatulog kayo na ganun ang pwesto. kinabukasan, nagising ka na lang dahil sa sikat ng araw. pag gising mo, may suot kang damit at nakabalot ka sa kumot. gumulong ka sa kabilang side ng kama mo, kinuha mo ang cellphone mo na nakapatong sa sidetable at binuksan ito para tignan kung anong oras na.

6:10 AM | JENO: whatever happened last night, i hope we can both agree that i never happened and never should’ve happened.

6:10 AM | JENO: kalimutan na lang natin na nangyari ‘yun.

6:13 AM | JENO: i’m off to america today for a business conference, 2 weeks.

6:15 AM | JENO: you have the whole house to yourself until then, we’ll talk when i get back. malapit nang matapos ‘tong kontrata natin that’s why i need to talk to you about this matter. mag-uusap tayo.

10 a.m. nang mabasa mo ang text niya, parang bigla kang nanghina at nandiri sa sarili mo. ano bang inexpect mo sa asawa mong pinili ka para sa trust fund niya? mai-inlove sa’yo pagkatapos niyong magtalik kagabi? hindi naman siguro ganun ‘yun. 1 p.m. pa ang pasok mo ngayon, bukod sa text ni jeno, nakatanggap ka ng text sa boss mo. pinapapunta ka ng maaga sa trabaho kaya naman kahit nasaktan ka sa nabasa mo, binalewala mo na lang ito at naghanda papuntang opisina. 

“congrats, y/n! na-promote ka na!” nakangiting sabi ng boss mo, “see, all of your hard work led you to this moment! team leader ka na, pero… may konting problema lang tayo,” dagdag niya, hinihintay mo siyang magpatuloy, “you see, nagustuhan kasi ng ibang branch yung way of work mo. gusto sana nilang kuhain ka muna pansamantala. okay lang ba ‘yun sa’yo? kung hindi naman, pwede naman natin tanggihan— na sa’yo pa rin ang desisyon.”

“saan pong branch?”

“sa busan, okay lang ba? may kalayuan pero okay naman na. hindi naman mababawasan ang sweldo mo, tataasan pa nga.” tawa niya, “so, alam kong hindi mo kayang magdecide ngayon pero sana pag-isipan mo agad-agad. may 1 week ka para mag-isip at kausapin ang asawa mo tungkol dito ha, balikan mo ako kung kailan nakagawa ka na ng desisyon. nasa office lang ako lagi.”

tumango ka sa boss mo at nagpasalamat, inabot na rin niya sa’yo ang mga papeles na dapat mong pirmahan by the end of the week. binasa mo ito pag balik mo ng cubicle mo, sa taas ng bago mong sweldo, pwede ka na nga talagang umalis ng siyudad na ito at bumalik sa lugar kung nasaan ang pamilya mo. nagdadalawang isip ka rin kung sasabihin mo pa ba ito kay jeno o hindi na, after all, wala namang saysay kung sasabihin mo di ‘ba? hindi rin naman kayo masyadong nagpapansinan sa bahay. bahala na, isip mo at pinirmahan ang dokumento.

dalawang linggo ang nakalipas, pagbalik ni jeno galing ng amerika, inaasahan niyang madadatnan ka niya sa bahay niyo. tanghali kasi nang dumating siya, hindi rin siya sigurado sa oras ng pasok mo dahil madalas shifting ka, minsan 10 am, minsan 2 pm, madalas gabi ang pasok mo. pagpasok niya, ganun pa rin ang bahay, tahimik at malinis. sobrang pagod ni jeno dahil sa haba ng biyahe mula amerika pauwi ng korea, kaya naman dumiretso na siya agad sa kwarto niya para magpahinga, hoping that once he wakes up, he’ll find you back home and you’ll talk about your situation regarding the trust fund.

pero nagising siya sa madilim na bahay, mag-isa at tahimik. sa pagkakaalala niya, 12 p.m. nang makarating siya sa bahay, alas otso na ng gabi at wala pa rin ang presensya mo. nagtataka si jeno kaya naman kinuha niya ang cellphone niya at idinial ang number mo kahit antok na antok pa siya. the number or code you have dialed is incorrect, please try again later. napakunot ang noo niya, anong meron? bakit ayaw? isip niya, at muling pinindot ang tawag pero ganun pa rin ang sagot. sighing, jeno left the comfort of his bed and exited his room. across his room is yours, he knocked three times but all were not answered. binuksan niya ang pinto at nakita na halos lahat ng gamit mo ay wala na, tanging kama, at ilang gamit na pinamili mo dati ang naiwan. agad niyang binuksan ang mga cabinet mo, walang mga damit pati na rin ang mga maleta mo, wala na.

“putangina, nasaan ka ba y/n?” mura ni jeno, nagdial ulit siya ng number mo pero wala talaga. nagtry siyang magtext pero lahat ito hindi nagsesend. hindi madalas gumamit si jeno ng kahit anong social media apps, pero para sa’yo, binuksan niya ang mga ito para hanapin ang accounts mo. walang lumabas ni-isa, parang kang bula— biglang naglaho at nawala.

tangina. 

—.

“how are you loving busan so far?” tanong ng bago mong boss, “sabi ng boss mo sakin sa seoul nung bumisita ako, taga-rito ka raw. it’s nice to be back home, ano?”

nginitian mo siya at tumango ka, “opo, sobrang tagal ko pong hindi nakauwi. na-miss ko dito, sobra” sagot mo, “thank you po pala for coming with me sa doktor… nakakahiya, boss ko pa naman po kayo.”

“nako y/n, ‘wag kang mahiya sakin.” tawa niya, “tsaka kailangan mo ring alagaan ‘yang batang dinadala mo. hindi ako makapaniwalang limang buwan na pala siya tapos wala kang kamuwang-muwang.”

“oo nga po eh, ‘di ko alam, cryptic pregnancy na pala ‘yung meron ako ngayon” napakamot ka ng batok, sobrang hindi obvious na buntis ka dahil most of the time akala mo bloated ka lang, ‘yun pala may bata na sa loob ng tyan mo. naguguilty ka na hindi mo malaman, alam mo kasing dapat mong sabihin ‘to kay jeno pero hindi mo magawang sabihin ito dahil iniwan mo siya sa ere nung nasa amerika siya. ni hindi mo nga alam kung anong ginagawa niya ngayon sa buhay niya. wala kang balita o kahit anong alam tungkol sa kanya ngayon. “sir jungwoo, pasensya na po talaga sa abala ha and sobrang thank you po sa pagaasikaso sakin”

“wala ‘yun, ano ka ba” ngiti nito, “gusto mo bang kumain ng lunch? may alam akong healthy restaurant malapit dito at pwede kitang samahan sa pagbili ng gamit ng bata.”

“hala, baka nakakaabala ako sa’yo sir…” sagot mo, “kaya ko naman na po dito, magtataxi na lang ako papunta ng mall.”

“‘wag na, sasamahan na lang kita. pareho naman tayong off ngayon eh,” sabi ni jungwoo, “tsaka, jungwoo na lang… wala naman tayo sa trabaho eh. samahan na kita kumain ng lunch tsaka sa pagshopping mo ng gamit ng bata.”

tutal nag-offer na rin naman ang boss mo, pumayag ka na at sumabay ng labas sa ospital sa kanya. ang totoo niyan, na-awkwardan ka kanina dahil ang akala ng doktor ay asawa mo si jungwoo kahit nakasalubong mo lang naman siya sa lobby ng ospital dahil bumisita siya sa kaibigan niya. pero ngumiti na lang si jungwoo nung sinabi sa inyo na “five months na ang baby niyo, healthy naman siya so far”. nahihiya ka dahil boss mo ito, tapos napagkamalan pang tatay ng anak mo— ang anak mong hindi mo alam na nageexist until today. bakit kaya hindi nadetect ‘tong bata noong nagpa-medical ka bago bumalik dito sa busan? bakit ngayon lang, na nagtataka ka dahil bukod sa nagkakaroon ka pa rin, biglang lumobo ang tiyan mo kaya nagkusa kang pumunta sa doktor. 

“so, forgive me sa tanong ko, anong history niyo ng tatay ni baby?” tanong niya at humigop ng sabaw sa inorder niyong pagkain. “pwede mo namang hindi sagutin kung hindi ka komportable.”

“magulo, sir— i mean, jungwoo.” sagot mo, “sobrang gulo talaga.”

“paanong magulo? may third party o ano?”

hindi mo alam kung anong meron kay jungwoo pero mabilis kang nakapag-open up sa kanya kung ikukumpara mo sa pamilya mo. ni hindi nga alam ng pamilya mo na kasal ka dahil sa kagustuhan mong itago ito. pinaliwanag mo kay jungwoo na kaya ka kasal dahil gustong makuha ni jeno ang trust fund niya sa lolo niya, and the only way he could get this is to get married. matagal na kasing gusto ng lolo ni jeno na ikasal siya dahil sa kanilang magkakapatid at magpipinsan, siya na lang ang hindi pa kasal. halos lahat ng mga kapatid at pinsan niya ay nakuha na ang kanilang mga trust fund— except for him dahil wala pa siyang asawa. to make it more believable, jeno created a contract to stay married with you for a year hanggang sa maproseso niya ang trust fund niya. pero ngayong iniisip mo ito, mukhang hindi ata nakuha ni jeno ang trust fund niya dahil nawala ka bigla. 

“wait, so, kinasal ka dahil gusto ng asawa mo makuha ‘yung pera sa lolo niya?” tanong ni jungwoo, tumango ka at sumubo ng kanin. “tapos bago ka mapromote, may nangyari sa inyo… tama ba?” tumango ka ulit, “tapos nasaktan ka sa sinabi niya dahil pakiramdam mo, ginamit ka lang talaga niya tapos pinirmahan mo ‘yung kontrata agad-agad?”

“tumpak.” ngiti mo, “anyway, ilang buwan na ang nakalipas simula nun. wala na akong contact sa kanya, wala na lahat.”

“paano kapag bumalik?”

napatigil ka sa pag nguya, hindi naman na babalik 'yun dahil wala ka naman sa kanya eh. hindi ka importante sa buhay niya in the first place. “hindi na 'yun babalik, jungwoo.” sabi mo, may bahid ng lungkot ang boses mo kaya tumango si jungwoo. “ano ba 'yan, ang lungkot ng usapan natin. pwede bang change topic?”

naging magkaibigan kayo ni jungwoo simula nung araw na 'yun, siya lang rin ang nakakaalam ng history mo kay jeno at siya lang rin ang nakakaalam nabuntis ka ng asawa mo. medyo nahirapan kang sabihin itonsa mga magulang mo, unang una, hindi naman kasi nila alam na kasal ka na dahil hindi mo ito sinabi— ang alam mo lang kasi, matatapos ang kontrata niyo ni jeno at pagtapos nun, pwede ka nang magpatuloy sa buhay mo nang hindi nila nalalaman 'yun. you even considered it to be your deepest, darkest secret, pero nag-iwan ng souvenir si jeno.

—.

"babalik ka na sa seoul, sigurado na ba 'yan? hindi ka na tatakas?" tanong ni jungwoo sa'yo sa tawag, kasalukuyan kang nagmamaneho pabalik ng seoul, traffic pa nga at maling ideya talaga na umalis kayo ng anak mo ng late na. "si lily? okay lang ba siya?"

"okay lang siya, tulog sa likod" sagot mo, "woo, thank you ha. i can't stress enough how thankful i am to you the past 4 years." sabi mo sa kanya, "thank you for acting like a father figure kay lily, sayang na-cut short. ready na pa naman akong pakasalan ka" asar mo, madalas kasing isipin ng mga ka-trabaho mo na ang anak mo ay anak rin ni jungwoo kaya naging inside joke niyo na itong magkaibigan.

"tarantado ka, sumbong kita sa asawa mo eh" asar nito pabalik, "papunta rin ako ng seoul bukas, tulungan ko kayo mag-ayos sa apartment niyo."

"sige, sige! matutuwa nyan si lily," sagot mo, "for now, sa iisang kwarto muna kami matutulog. wala pa raw kasi 'yung inorder kong kama niya sabi ng landlord. bukas pa ata dadating, keri mo bang tulungan ako iset-up 'yun?"

"ako pa ba, y/n?"

"hay nako, woo. una na ako, umaandar na 'yung traffic, bye na. ingat ka bukas ha!"

bukod sa gasolina at pagpapahangin ng gulong ng kotse niyo, nagdecide kang dumaan sa rest stop dahil nagising si lily sa likod at nagsabing nagugutom na siya. dalawang oras pa ang byahe niyo kaya maganda na rin sigurong magpahinga muna kayo kahit isang oras rito sa rest stop para kumain at magliwaliw mag-ina.

"mommy, look oh! samoyed!" excited na sabi ng anak mo at tinuro ang puting aso na naglalakad kasama ang amo niya. "hello, can i pet your dog po?" the dog was owned by a young couple, natuwa sila dahil napaka-polite ng anak mo at tumango para payagan na hawakan ang aso. "you're so cute!"

simula nung nag-aral si lily sa isang kindergarten sa busan, madalas na sinasabi ng mga guro niya na mahilig sa aso at pusa ang bata. halos saulo na niya ang iba't ibang klase ng breed ng mga aso at pusa at sa tuwing nakakakita siya nito, gustong gusto niyang hawakan. "bye bye, cutie! alis na kami ng mommy ko" paalam niya sa aso, "thank you po for letting me play with your dog" ngumiti ang dalawa sa kanya at naglakad na palayo. humawak na si lily sa kamay mo at pumasok kayo sa isang maliit na restaurant, mahilig rin sa fried chicken ang bata— halos ito na lang ata ang gusto niyang kainin araw-araw. "mommy, may new school na po ako di 'ba?" tanong niya sa'yo habang naghihintay kayo ng pagkain.

nilapag mo sa lamesa ang cellphone mo at tinignan ang anak mo, may hawig ni jeno ang bata. kung saan nakapwesto ang nunal ni jeno, na nasa ilalim ng mata, ganun rin ang sa bata. pati ang hulma ng mga mata nito kapag nakangiti ay parang si jeno. "yes anak, malapit sa office ni mommy para mabilis kita masundo." sagot mo at hinawi ang buhok niyang nakatakip sa mukha niya, "kinakabahan ka ba kasi bagong lugar?"

"nope!" sagot niya, "magkakaroon naman po ako ng bagong friends 'dun, sabi ni dada woo, marami daw pong dogs sa seoul! kaya excited rin po ako!"

ngumiti ka sa anak mo at pinisil ang pisngi nito, ang cute cute kasi niya. pinapanood mong kumain ang anak mo habang nagrereply sa mga chat ni jungwoo sa'yo, kanina ka pa kinukulit na gusto raw niyang makita ang inaanak niya kaya kada galaw ng bata sa loob ng restaurant at rest stop, kailangan mong i-send kay jungwoo.

"mommy, ayaw kong pumasok sa cr. dito na lang po ako sa labas" sabi ng anak mo, "promise po, here lang ako"

"pero anak, delikado eh… baka kung saan ka mapunta o may kumuha sa'yo"

"mommy big girl na po ako, lagi ko po natatandaan 'yung rule mo: don't talk to strangers?"

"hmm, okay. mommy trusts you enough naman na, saglit lang ako, okay? don't go anywhere!"

tumango ang bata sa'yo at talagang hindi nga siya umalis sa labas ng banyo. pero dahil bata, madalas gumagana ang imahinasyon niya at naglaro. lily was skipping steps, singing random songs na natatandaan niyang pinatugtog ng teacher niya before pero natigil ito nang bigla siyang mabangga ng isang lalaki at bumagsak siya sa sahig.

"oh my, are you okay?" tanong ng lalaki sa kanya at tinulungan siyang lumuhod para pagpagin ang dumi sa pantalon ng bata.

"yes po!" ngiti ni lily, "sorry, hindi po dapat ako naglalaro dyan banda…"

"no, okay lang. nagmamadali kasi ako kaya hindi kita napansin." sabi nito, "asan kasama mo? mommy? daddy? bakit mag-isa ka dito?"

"hmm, 'yung dada ko po nasa busan pa narinig ko sila ni mommy na susunod raw si dada woo bukas samin sa seoul kasi lilipat na kami ng bahay. 'yung mommy ko po nasa cr" sagot ng bata, "hala, i just broke mommy's rule na don't talk to strangers!"

natawa ang lalaki sa bata, inayos niya ang sarili niya at inabot ang kamay. "i'm jeno lee, hindi na ako stranger. anong name mo?"

"lily!" 

"nice to meet you, lily." ngiti ni jeno, "gusto mo bang samahan muna kita dito hanggang sa makalabas si mommy mo sa cr?"

"sure po, tito jeno!"

maraming kwento ang bata kay jeno, parehong tao na walang kamuwang-muwang na mag-ama sila. ilang minuto pa ang lumipas bago ka makalabas ng banyo at nahulog ang puso mo nang makita mo si lily na hawak-hawak ang kamay ni jeno. putangina, totoo ba 'tong nakikita ko? isip mo, bumitaw sa pagkakahawak ng kamay si lily kay jeno at tumakbo sa'yo. "mommy!" tawag niya, yumakap ito sa binti mo at tinignan ka. "he stayed with me po, kanina while you were inside the restroom. he's not a bad guy mommy!" 

"y/n?"

"jeno?"

sabay kayong nagsalita kaya nagtaka si lily, "mommy, kilala mo po siya?" oo anak, siya ang tatay mo. "mommy?" sasagot ka na sana pero biglang nag-ring ang cellphone mo, agad itong kinuha ni lily mula sa bag mo. "mommy, it's dada! pwede ko po ba sagutin? miss ko na siya eh"

"a-ah, sige," sabi mo, agad namang sinagot ni lily ang tawag. muling nagtama ang mga mata niyo ni jeno, "hi"

"hi" sagot niya, "kumusta? you're a mom na pala"

tangina naman jeno, kamukha mo 'yung bata, hindi pa ba obvious? "oo, pasensya na kung madaldal ah… madaldal kasi 'yung… ano…" nauutal ka, parang 'di mo mahanap 'yung tamang salita na gusto mong sabihin. "una na kami jeno ha, salamat sa pagbabantay sa kanya kahit saglit lang."

paalis ka na sana, pero biglang hinawakan ni jeno ang kamay mo. nagulat ka naman, "y/n, you do know we have things to talk about, di 'ba?" tanong nito, "it's long overdue. pwede ba kitang ayain magkape? your daughter said sa seoul na raw kayo titira—"

"jeno, kung okay lang sa'yo, pwede bang 'wag muna ngayon?" sagot mo naman, "marami pa kasi akong aasikasuhin, 'yung bahay, 'yung trabaho ko, 'yung eskwelahan ng anak ko…"

"hindi ko naman sinabing ngayon na agad, we can schedule it."

"okay…"

"the last time i tried to contact you, incorrect daw 'yung number. pwede ko bang kunin 'yung bago mong number ngayon?" 

tumango ka at inabot ang isang business card mo sa kanya, dali-dali kang nagpaalam sa kanya at hinawakan ang kamay ni lily para bumalik sa kotse niyo. habang nilalagyan mo ng seatbelt si lily sa car seat niya, hindi mo maiwasang hindi maluha. apat na taon na ang nakalipas, pero ganun pa rin si jeno. sa apat na taon mong tinago ang anak mo— niyo, may mga araw na hindi mo maiwasang hindi maisip si jeno. paano kaya kung walang nangyari sa inyo nung gabi ng birthday ng lolo niya? walang lily ngayon. paano kaya kung hinintay mo nga talaga na makauwi si jeno sa bahay niyong dalawa imbis na maglaho sa buhay niya? andami mong tanong sa sarili mo, mga tanong na walang sagot sa ngayon.

"woo" tawag mo sa kaibigan mong kasalukuyan nag-aayos ng kama ni lily, "nagkita na sila"

"sinong sila?" tanong nito, ang atensyon niya ay hindi nawawala sa ginagawa niya. "kailangan ko ng context, y/n"

"si lily at 'yung tatay niya"

napatigil si jungwoo sa pagkilos at tinitigan ka, "anong nangyari? paano?"

"sa rest stop kahapon, nagtetext na nga sakin kung kailan daw ba ako pwedeng kitain…" sagot mo, "hindi ko kaya, woo… parang ayoko siyang harapin"

naiintinidihan ni jungwoo kung saan ka nangagaling, naiintindihan niya kung ayaw mong harapin ang asawa mo. after all, your marriage is only a marriage of convenience plus lily was an accident— your beautiful accident. hindi mo alam kung napansin ba ni jeno ang similarities nila ng anak niyo, pero sana hindi, dahil ayaw mo pang sabihin sa kanya ang totoo kahit alam mong deserve niyang malaman ang totoo.

"kitain mo na, y/n" sabi ni jungwoo at hinarap ka, "malay mo naman hindi tungkol kay lily ang pag-uusapan niyo, malay mo tungkol lang sa nangyari years ago." humawak si jungwoo sa parehong balikat mo, "di 'ba ikaw ang umalis ng walang paalam? malay mo ang bitbit ni jeno pag nagkita kayo eh divorce papers. y/n, hindi naman kayo nag-hiwalay talaga ni jeno eh, technically, kasal ka pa rin. kasal pa rin kayo."

"alam mo, nakakainis ka talaga" tawa mo at yumakap kay jungwoo, "anong gagawin ko kung wala ka?"

"tsk, ano ba. ako lang 'to, y/n!" ngiti ni jungwoo at niyakap ka pabalik. "o bitaw na, tatapusin ko na 'yung kama ng anak mo."

SUNDAY, 6:39 PM | JENO (NEW): hey y/n! i just wanted to ask if this is a good time for us to talk? no rush, will understand kung hindi pa pwede. there’s a new coffee shop near my office, maybe we can meet there if possible?

MONDAY, 9:27 PM | JENO (NEW): i saw lily earlier today at the mall, he was with a guy. is that her dad? they looked cute together.

TUESDAY, 11:23 AM | JENO (NEW): sorry kung makulit, just really need to talk to you. is this a good time? please reply as soon as you can.

TUESDAY, 5:55 PM | JENO (NEW): is now a good time, y/n? nasa work ka ba? maybe i can pick you up.

WEDNESDAY, 10:28 AM | JENO (NEW): y/n please reply whenever you’re available to talk, i’m free wherever and whenever. 

WEDNESDAY, 6:39 PM | JENO (NEW): sorry kung nakukulitan ka na sakin, please let me know if you’re available tonight. we really need to talk. please reply asap.

WEDNESDAY, 6:40 PM | Y/N LEE: sorry for the late reply, kakatapos lang ng shift ko and lily’s with a sitter kaya i’m free now. 

WEDNESDAY, 6:40 PM | JENO (NEW): nasa office ka, right? i can pick you up.

WEDNESDAY, 6:40 PM | Y/N LEE: no need, i’ll just meet you kung saan mo gusto. palabas na ‘ko ng office.

WEDNESDAY, 6:41 PM | JENO (NEW): too late, i just arrived here. 

WEDNESDAY, 6:41 PM | JENO (NEW): i’m outside your building na. black benz. 

hindi ka na nagreply kay jeno at lumabas na sa building ng opisina niyo, bago ka pa bumaba kanina naka-ilang practice ka ng tamang paghinga dahil kinakabahan ka sa mangyayari. pag labas mo, nakita mo si jeno na nakatayo sa labas ng sasakyan niya, suot suot ang itim na tuxedo. ngumiti sa'yo si jeno at pinagbuksan ka ng pintuan bago sumunod sa'yo sa loob, nakilala mo ang driver niya— si taeil na minsan mo nang nakasama sa mga event na pinupuntahan niyo dati.

"saan tayo pupunta?" tanong mo, "kasi hanggang 9 lang ang napaki-usapan kong oras sa baby sitter ni lily." 

"dinner. hindi ka pa kumakain, sigurado ako"

tumango ka na lang at nilipat ang atensyon mo sa bintana, pinapanood na bumukas ang mga ilaw ng malalaking building. neither one of you are speaking, kahit ang driver ay tahimik na nagmamaneho, tanging radyo lang ang tumutunog hanggang sa nakarating kayo sa isang kilalang restaurant. 

"so… about us," simula ni jeno pagkatapos niyong umorder, "bakit ka umalis?"

wow, right away. isip mo, napalunok ka ng laway at kinuha ang sinerve na wine at uminom. "i felt like i needed to leave, pasensya na kung umalis akong walang paalam." sagot mo, pero hindi siya satisfied at gusto pa ng sagot. "ewan ko jeno, nung araw na umalis ka papuntang amerika… nagtext ka sakin, sabi mo kalimutan natin kung ano man ang nangyari satin nung gabing 'yun. nasaktan ako, parang 'dun lang nag-sink in sakin na… ginagamit mo lang ako." sabi mo, biglang kumalma at bumagsak ang balikat niya. umiling at umiwas ka ng tingin bago ituloy ang sasabihin mo, "tapos nalaman kong na-promote ako sa trabaho, pabalik sa busan. sabi ng boss ko, may isang linggo ko para magdesisyon at para kausapin ka pero, hindi ko ginawa 'yun kasi atat na atat akong iwanan ang siyudad na 'to."

"pero—"

"alam ko naman kasi na ginagamit mo lang ako bilang asawa mo dahil sa trust fund na gusto mong makuha pero, hindi ako sigurado kung kaya ko bang ituloy 'yun. alam kong nagawa ko siya ng matagal, natiis ko, pero ang baba bigla ng tingin ko sa sarili ko."

"and nung umalis ka, nakahanap ka na ng iba at nagka-anak kayo? we're still married by paper, you know?"

"ha?" taka mo, "ah, si jungwoo…" ito na 'yun y/n, umamin ka na. "hindi siya ang tatay ng anak ko"

"i'm confused"

"lily is yours, jeno." sagot mo, "lily is an accident, alam mo bang 5 months na siya sa tiyan ko nung nalaman kong buntis ako sa kanya? wala akong ka-muwang muwang na pinagbubuntis ko na pala siya. akala ko tumataba lang ako, pero… buntis na pala ako." 

"paanong— ha? paano? eh sino 'yung tinatawag na dada ni lily kung sakin siya?"

"cryptic pregnancy 'yung nangyari sakin. basically, unaware akong buntis ako hanggang nung nagpa-checkup ako. sabi ng doktor, hindi daw madalas mangyari 'yung ganung klase ng pagbubuntis. nagkakaroon pa rin ako nun kaya nagulat rin ako bakit ako buntis," paliwanag mo, "jungwoo… boss ko siya actually, siya ang unang nakaalam kung anong sitwasyon ko sa'yo at naging magkaibigan kami pagtapos niya kong samahan sa ospital. lily calls him dada kasi siya na ang naging father figure ng bata"

nadistract si jeno bigla dahil nagseserve ang waiter ng pagkain. hindi niya alam kung paano ia-absorb ang impormasyong nalaman niya. ang batang sinamahan niya sa rest stop pansamantala, ay sa kanya. hinintay niyang umalis ang waiter bago siya magsalita, "and you thought it was the best na itago sakin ang anak natin?" tanong niya, napabuntong hininga ka at umiling. "y/n, you could've called me. pwede kong sustentuhan ang bata—"

"hindi kaya ng pride ko 'yun, jeno" you cut off, "i mean, thank you for taking interest of giving support to our child. pero ikaw na mismo 'yung nagsabi dati na ayaw mong magka-anak and our marriage will remain as—"

"y/n, anak ko rin si lily." sumbat niya, "kahit na sinabi ko dati na ayaw kong magka-anak, handa naman akong panindigan siya."

kinuha mo ang gamit mo sa kabilang upuan at tumayo, "...i'm sorry, jeno" bulong mo at umalis. dali-daling naglabas ng pera si jeno, agad itong nilagay sa lamesa at sinundan ka. 

pero huli na si jeno, and for the second time around, umalis ka na naman.

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*     ◟    :    〔   BIE THASSAPAK HIU  ,      agender    +   they / them    〕      PAKORN NATHARUETAI ,      some say you’re a  THIRTY - SEVEN YEAR OLD  lost soul among the neon lights.      known for being both  DISCIPLINED  and  EMBITTERED,  one can’t help but think of  INITIATION  by   CROWN THE EMPIRE  when you walk by.    are you still the   UNDERBOSS / PROFESSIONAL POKER PLAYER  for    HANGING MAN / THE OLD WORLD CASINO,     even with your reputation as the THE IRON FIST?     i think we’ll be seeing more of you and    THE BLUISH - BLACKISH FLUID STREAMING THROUGH YOUR VEINS LIKE A SECOND LIFE'S FORCE , PUMPING & OILING YOUR AUGMENTATIONS ; THE CLICK - CLICK - WHIR OF YOUR SYNTHETICS , PAINTING YOU AS REPLICANT WHEN YOU ARE STILL SOMETHING CLOSE TO A MAN ; THE VACANT , RED - EYED GAZE ACROSS THE GREEN TABLE AS THE CHIPS ARE RAKED & THE STAKES ARE RAISED EVER HIGHER ,   although we can’t help but think of EDWARD ELRIC ( FULLMETAL ALCHEMIST ) ; MAJOR KUSANAGI MOTOKO ( GHOST IN THE SHELL ) ; THE TERMINATOR ( TERMINATOR FILM SERIES )   whenever we see you down these rainy streets.

𝙱𝙰𝚂𝙸𝙲𝚂.

full name: pakorn natharuetai.

nickname: pa, korn, uncle natha ( or not. )

age: 37.

birthday: march 31st.

zodiac sun sign: aries.

gender + pronouns: agender + they / them.

orientation: whoever wants some sheet metal.

birthplace: new york.

languages: german, thai, english, spanish, japanese. is able to 'scan' verbal pattern & consistencies & "learn" languages that way due to an augmentation.

accent: smoke-heavy grating, hoarse like he hasn't spoken for years.

occupation: underboss @ hanging man, poker player @ casino.

loyalty: his sister, once. hanging man.

family: parents ( still living, lost contact ) aranya ( sister, presumed dead. )

𝙳𝙴𝚃𝙰𝙸𝙻𝚂.

hair: jet-black, shines blue in the fluorescent lights. almost always slicked back, with tendrils falling forward onto his temples & forehead. well-kept.

eyes: once, they were both brown. now, only the left is. the right is augmented with focus-optics & analytic technology, causing the iris & pupil to black out & dilate. sometimes, if he is really focused, you can see your own reflection in it.

piercings: left earlobe only, single diamond stud, heirloom from his mother.

tattoos: ( left arm. ) his right arm is nearly entirely cybernetics.

mbti: istj - the inspector.

moral alignment: lawful evil.

+ disciplined, analytic, solution-oriented.

- intimidating, easily detached, prone to violence.

𝙱𝙰𝙲𝙺𝙶𝚁𝙾𝚄𝙽𝙳. ( cw: grief, death, cybernetic surgery mentions, wounds )

you were truly on the path to greatness. it had been carved out for you, & you put upon it like a wind-up toy, focused to moving forward & never looking back. so you churned on. you were the top player on the hockey team, you would cut through the water in the pools like you'd been doing it for years. your mind always ran too quick for your body to catch up, and even when you were younger, you found that you grew frustrated with how much your limbs lagged. perhaps that was the origin point for your future haunting. but at the time, you knew nothing but the love that was shared in your household. however difficult, however strange. you watched over your little sister whenever she would let you; you did chase off many partners because they simply weren't good enough. & perhaps that is where the narrative started to doom itself: where you started seeing that no one was good enough. not for you. not for her. your iron fist has too strong of a grip. you were doomed to lose her later. it was written in the cosmos. you weren't there when the mad dog closed his teeth around her throat & shook her to death. you weren't there when the fires burned her up. for all of your closed-fist nuances, you were helpless, in the end. & something in you snapped wide open to let the blood flow.

law enforcement had failed you. failed your family. failed everything it ever stood for. you rebuffed it, rebuked it; you wanted nothing to do with it. you surrendered your education & vanished off the edge of the map. you got into a brawl at the right bar at the wrong time; you were recruited into the hanging man because you had no decency. no dignity. they're right; you don't. that's what made you climb up over the years, that's what gave you leashes to be held tight in the fist. but even so, you never expected the name to become literal. mission by mission, fight by fight, you found another part of you torn off. some kind of manifestation of the metaphor, how you sacrificed bits & pieces of yourself for the cause. it would never be the height of the payment your sister suffered; somehow, you still kept going. feeling less in your own burned nerves, wondering if this was what she felt before it all went dark. sometimes, you wish it would all go dark. but instead, your vision regains clarity. you find yourself out of hospitals & in cybernetic garages. you find yourself ( becoming more augmented each time. ) you gain strength. intellect. you are able to keep digging up the dirt that you buried her with.

you took your tactics for the game & turned it into a second career. you're close enough to a replicant that people mistake you for one; you're still human enough that you bleed when sliced. you slice in return, but through card edges. you took your intimidation to the poker table & offer a challenge that few others can. there is nothing quite like the adrenaline rush of taking on a man-half-machine, on the eye contact made in the thrill of the calls, the throws, the hands. you show nothing & that makes them hunger to make you react. your men know that if they push you too far, you don't hesitate, you knock them into the wall, the table, the chair, tell them to step back or step up or make a choice, make one make one. you keep making yours. you don't give yourself enough time to doubt whether or not they are good. your path got carved in another direction. so much for greatness.

there are very few instances where you feel at all. perhaps that's your technology. perhaps that's the fact that something did burn up in you all those years ago. you are not your parents' son, not now. you are nobody's son. nobody's sibling. it has to be better that way. when you become something attached to others, then that's licence to lose. you're not going to lose. if anybody tries to bite you, they tear their own mouth up. and that's just the way it goes. your grief is your weapon. it has rotted too far for you to taste.

𝙲𝙾𝙽𝙽𝙴𝙲𝚃𝙸𝙾𝙽𝚂.

some basics: fellow hanging men, come forth ; replicants / cyborgs / augmented people he might have encountered when in a shop or otherwise ; fellow poker players at the casino, maybe friendly games, maybe not so friendly games ; previous lovers or current ones, if you're fine with sheet metal who operates on a no-strings-attached policy & has no qualms leaving you behind ; ferocious friend / brothers-in-arms bonds that send him spiralling into questioning whether or not he can feel still ; the sweet taste of those who knew / have known aranya is still alive / enemies that want to get into fist-fights ; anything else we can think of!

#𝐏𝐀𝐊𝐎𝐑𝐍. / intro. #lawlessintro #surprise...

[punkpandapatrixk]

The Kind of Magic Each Zodiac Sign Carries🧚🏻‍♀️ Pt.2

A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away...

A Star was receiving punishment for horrendous crimes across the known Universe. The Star had disturbed the law and order of the Cosmos, so the sentence was for it to experience total Chaos for its repentance. It was decided the Star would test out different levels of consciousness to study duality and separation. A planet now torn apart by wars for its operation of Freewill was chosen as the Star's learning ground.

The Star, then, had to go through 12 cycles of birth and death on Gaia. Each time the Star was incarnate in a new form, it would take on a new name whilst retaining knowledge and memories from its previous incarnations. This is the birth, lives, and death of a Star through the zodiacal wheel.

☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・.

Here is a tiny myth (fictional tho) for new and old astrology students alike. This is meant to help you get familiar with the basic nature (or personality?) of each zodiac sign in a manner that allows you to see the more magical aspect of it—in both good and not-so-good ways.

Magic is impartial. There's creation magic and there's destruction magic. Rely on your own innate wisdom in regards to how you see creation and destruction as a positive or negative force.

[Back to Masterlist] [Part 1]

Ionno what was possessing me when I wrote Part 1. It was written almost half a year ago LMAO Reading it now, the whole writing is somewhat chaos. Do forgive me if you can😶It’s still a pretty wholesome post if you’re passionate about Astro hahah

⚖️Libra Magic

The Star returns to Gaia in its seventh incarnation. For the first time, the Star feels like an adult—like it's learnt enough and thus, wiser. Being on the opposite end of Aries, Libra now looks at its own first incarnation and ponders a lot the nature of being Human. What does it mean to be Human in a world that constantly bathes in misunderstandings and conflicts? Surely everybody has their own reasons behind their differing worldviews. The Star is no longer a child, but also not mature enough to understand all of the world with its intricacies. Libra thinks it best to try to balance itself in the way it thinks, perceives and judges the world. Libra thinks it best to always be fair with everybody. But in doing so, in prioritising that, sometimes Libra forgets it needs to be fair with itself—that it also needs to be prioritised and paid careful attention to.

Libra magic of creation - Priestess of Opulence

-This card is like the purplest in the whole deck like oh ma gosh if that ain’t the colour of Libra.-

Good cheer is in the blood of a Libra individual. Not only is Libra capable of creating magic everywhere it goes, but by its sheer presence Libra is a delight to others; this is because Libra casts beauty on whatever it touches. And just like that, Libra often serves as a source of inspiration for those around it. There’s beauty, but there’s also ambition and petty jealousy. Libra holds ambitchious power which it doesn’t speak of very often but others can see it via natural charisma. Oh, and… have you seen a Libra individual who isn’t destined for riches? They’re a rarity instead. Libra has this inner knowing that they can be and achieve whatever they want. The ambition is there. The only other challenge is whether or not Libra will allow itself to be bitchy enough to have its way in the world🚬😎

Libra magic of destruction - 9 of Cups Rx

Trying too hard to be rational, Libra can often forego daydreams. What this causes to a Libra individual is a sense of bitterness. An underdeveloped Libra consciousness that has become bitter can be spiteful. And if you think this spells disaster for those around it, WRONG. A spiteful Libra bitch is a disaster to itself. Robbing itself of the little pleasures of life by being so preoccupied with low self-esteem, a toxic Libra individual pours poison to its own pool of mental clarity. It’s not like such an individual becomes toxic to others, but they just appear to be annoying in the eye of others. And being seen unfavourably by others only adds to a Libra’s sense of disorientation!

Point of self-actualisation - Silver Physician (John Dee)

Spiritual health gives maintenance to mental health, and the latter gives sustenance to physical health. This is literally what this oracle is all about. And so for the Star to thrive in this human world as a Libra, it would need to learn to balance all of those areas. It may sound like a tall order written on paper, but the Libra consciousness would be happy to know it’s been able to maintain order in such a fashion. Libra is symbolised by a scale (the only symbol that’s actually an inanimate object) and thus, carries both the consciousnesses of Virgo and Scorpio. In its previous incarnation as Virgo the Star was learning about being of service to others via self-sacrifice; meanwhile its next incarnation as Scorpio already causes the Libra Star to have anxieties about power and selfishness. The Star’s point of self-actualisation as a Libra then, becomes very confusing as only itself can decide what’s become its achievement whilst being incarnate as a diplomat consciousness. The key though, will always be balance.

☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・.

🦂Scorpio Magic

The Star now enters its eighth incarnation on Gaia as Scorpio. Having dealt with a sense of disorientation when it comes to its own identity for so long (from Aries all the way to Libra), the Star now seeks to solidify its own persona in the world. A persona may be a shadowplay but Scorpio is only at the beginning stages of creating an identity. A solid one at that. But the more important thing is that when a Scorpio presents itself outwardly, everything it chooses to express is by its own personal decree. Scorpio thinks what it wants to think and does as it pleases. And if it could influence someone else to taste a similar flavour of freedom, it would be happy. But Scorpio isn’t particularly concerned with such a thing because Scorpio lives for itself. Selfish as that may be, Scorpio is only trying to not be absorbed by its environment. So Scorpio keeps a lot of its real identity under wraps so nobody gets access to manipulate it.

Scorpio magic of creation - Priestess of Prosperity

There is no Scorpio who isn’t smart. The Scorpio intuition is piercing and intellect penetrative. Being a Water sign, its spirituality also plays a big role in determining a Scorpio individual’s type of eerie logic. When a Scorpio individual decides to not care what others think, they can only become more and more abundant in Life. A liberated Scorpio who has a good grasp on reality is quite literally the world’s greatest master manifesters. Well, as long as Scorpio lives for its own peaceful happiness tho, which may not always be so easy because Scorpio sorta feels what others think or say. On the outside I’m skrt skrt; on the inside I’m hurt hurt. A Scorpio individual who has been hurt a lot in Life will carry this magic of creation that’s fueled by vengeance. Vengeance on their lame past motivates Scorpio to achieve greatness and respect in the world, but whatever happens to their wounded spirit? Who knows. It’s Scorpio.

Scorpio magic of destruction - VI The Lovers Rx

Scorpio is obsessive, controlling and manipulative. They want to know and own all of you, but they guard themselves up that you don’t even know who they are. You can’t own Scorpio, but you belong to them if they’re obsessed enough with you. On top of such selfish logic, though Scorpio is usually calm and charismatic, it has no fear of doing the criminal things to do for punishment. Obsession is just one of Scorpio’s most conflicting traits—whether it’s used for good or bad depends on context. But Scorpio’s obsessive behaviours that have turned unhealthy could be its greatest downfall. Being on the opposite end of Taurus, Scorpio has that undercurrent of stubbornness to let go of what’s really not good for itself. Scorpio isn’t keen on letting go of what it considers its possession. It may not even be keen on changing the way it perceives things. Still, Scorpio is an old soul who has matured a lot, so unlike the stupid Taurus, Scorpio does learn eventually. And, rather quickly too.

Point of self-actualisation - Green Physician (Paracelsus)

-I honestly almost had nothing trying to derive any energetic information here. Such is the depth, and darkness, of Scorpio.-

For the sake of simplicity, let it be said that Scorpio’s point of self-actualisation is health and balance. This is because Scorpio can deal a lot with a sense of paralysis from its own obsessions. Different from Virgo’s analysis-paralysis, Scorpio’s paralysis is on the spiritual level. When Scorpio doesn’t understand itself, it ponders and ruminates to no end the meaning of good vs bad. Has it been a good incarnation or has it been a terrible incarnation? Is it good to have been so bad in society one gets feared? Or is it bad to have been so good that one gets underestimated by society? And on and on and on the answer everlastingly elusive. The Star would be successful in its incarnation as a Scorpio—its Soul would be satisfied—when it reaches its own peaceful conclusion. Not perfect, not good, not right; just what’s peaceful for itself. And that is the kind of thing that requires a lifetime of learning to make peace with its own dark, convoluted logic.

☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・.

🎠Sagittarius Magic

Moving forwards in the zodiacal wheel, the Star enters its ninth incarnation and begins to let go of the notion of being just human. The Star is right in the middle of phase two of its lessons on Gaia. The Star ponders a lot the meaning of being Human based on what it’s learnt so far about the Human world and its societies, cultures, dogmas and dramas. It’s clear enough Gaia is a messy place, but then, what must one do to ameliorate all of the reasons Gaia is a messed up place? The more the Star focuses on resolving Human conflicts, the more aware it becomes of all things that are ugly about Humans. And the more the Star allows itself to notice only the ugly parts, the more it comes into conflict with everyone else. And so the Star itself becomes a contributing factor in the conflicts and dramas of the Human realm. The more the Star tries to become higher than Humans, the more human it becomes, strangely enough🤷🏻‍♀️

Sagittarius magic of creation - Priestess of Inspiration

Being so big-brained and courageous—to a point of being petty, savage, and even plainly insufferable—Sagittarius is the world’s best inspirational character. Whether as a teacher, celebrity, or whatever. When Sagittarius consciousness is kind, mature, and compassionate, the individual could become so well-liked for their courage and respected for their savage. The key to achieving this wonderful point of self-creation is only one: heart. A Sagittarius incarnation can be said successful only when an individual uses their high-strung temperament for the purpose of ameliorating other people’s cowardice.

Sagittarius magic of destruction - King of Wands Rx

-I swear I shuffled the fuck outta these cards!!🤣-

Sagittarius’s most annoying trait is this: using its unique way of thinking and sheer fiery passion to act holier than thou. This attitude, coupled with a lack of actually proper study, gives rise to Sagittarius’s famed insufferably high-conflict personality. Must you always fight everyone who thinks differently than you? Must you always endeavour to fix another’s mindset/priority that doesn’t resemble your own? Must you always slip into that teacher role to straighten up other people’s conduct? Must you really take up all of these burdens on your shoulders and burn bridges with those you could have a friendly union with? Dunno. Sagittarius only cares what it wants to care. And others don’t get to change that. And, really, with that aggressive sense of social justice, who are you trying to protect, really, when you’re not even that social?

Point of self-actualisation - Red Astrologer (William Lilly)

With its keen intelligence, Sagittarius is the type of consciousness that sees all of the world’s problems. And it wants to fix them. And even if the Star could have a difficult time expressing this vulnerably and honestly, it does care a lot about other people. The Star cares so much about the Human world it can’t stand idly by watching the world burn itself. It’s just… Sagittarius’s method is often broken. The Star would be satisfied with itself if it accepts that being conflicty itself doesn’t resolve anything in the world. That it must spend its energy wisely into extensive study instead. That the pursuit of studying itself, also, is not about proving anything to anyone. That study is used to contribute something better than what’s already existing. This, is precisely the Star’s biggest lesson being incarnate as Sagittarius. Maybe because Gemini sits opposite to it and the Star still feels bitter about how its Gemini incarnation was so much all about people pleasing, and now it wants to exert power over everyone else instead. The Star wants to be seen as strong, opinionated and capable. At the end of the day, the Star just wants to be useful to its society. After all, there aren’t that many chances left to come to Gaia to fix all of the Planet’s problems.

☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・.

🐐Capricorn Magic

The Star is now at its tenth incarnation on Gaia. The last of the Earth element. By this point, the Star has reached maturity and come to understand a lot more about the intricacies of society vs self. Being Earthy, Capricorn possesses strong, determined, unshakeable qualities reminiscent of Virgo and Taurus. Capricorn perceives itself to be incredibly strong and thus, wishes to be a pillar for those it cares about. Sitting on the opposite end of motherly Cancer, Capricorn also expresses a similar self-sacrificing tendency through hard work. The Star believes at this point, that in order to be happy and fulfilled one must work really hard in accordance with the rules and laws of society. Capricorn plays smart by being not in direct opposition to structure, custom and law. But that workaholic-ism and blind obsession with glory may have caused the Star to forget the true meaning of enjoyment whilst being on Gaia…

Capricorn magic of creation - Priestess of Divination

Capricorn probably doesn’t get enough recognition for its protective tendencies. Listen, being ruled by Saturn, Capricorn consciousness often involves tons of restrictions and a feeling of being repressed, suppressed, walked all over—until the individual finds their own strength purely from within. With this raw transformative power Capricorn becomes strong and seeks to protect others from harm and malice. This is why Capricorn individuals are known to be workaholics. They know money is the ultimate tool for protection as they seek to shelter and provide for others. Capricorn consciousness, when developed properly, is the Earth’s ultimate protector—the Divine Father.

Capricorn magic of destruction - 7 of Wands Rx

With an inability to delegate or share its burdens, Capricorn destroys its own capacity for compassion through a martyr mindset. Yo, I’m the only one sacrificing myself to this degree and you’re still complaining?! How about some gratitude?! That’s toxic because in this way Capricorn doesn’t acknowledge another’s need for its attention, affection, beyond material possession. When this continues tho, Capricorn feels underappreciated for all its efforts and retreats deeper into isolation (sulking) because it doesn’t know how to convey its love. And just like that, Capricorn continues dwindling the drain of loneliness.

Point of self-actualisation - Red Magus (Edward Kelly)

In this card, Kelly looks into a scrying mirror made out of black obsidian. This is a crystal best known for its protective properties. But the question the Star must ponder is this: in trying to protect and shelter those it cares about, what is it sacrificing? If the Star’s aggressive protection becomes someone else’s prison, it’s pointless. The Star would end up regretting this a lot at the end of its incarnation. Self-reflection and a courage to admit the importance of human relations on an emotional level are the only things that can salvage the Star in its incarnation as Capricorn. Being cowardly doesn’t suit Capricorn.

☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・.

🏺Aquarius Magic

In a manner of speaking, Aquarius is the Star’s oldest incarnation as anything remotely Human. Being the last Air element, Aquarius is the height of Human intelligence. The Star is devoted to the amelioration of Human suffering as it dedicates itself to pioneering inventions and setting higher bars for new ways of doing as well as perceiving things. Aquarius wants legacy, but more than that, it wants to see a brand new world. For these reasons, Aquarius may become so preoccupied with being different and causing a disturbance in society. Well, that’s probably just a risk any pioneer must take. The convoluted nature of Aquarius’s way of thinking is not something many can grasp and this could cause a sense of alienation from the rest Mankind, which Aquarius so desperately wants to save.

Aquarius magic of creation - Priestess of Contemplation

Of course, high-speed thought process. Not many people acknowledge just how spiritual Aquarius is. Being so close to the last in the zodiacal wheel, Aquarius is like a bridge between the Higher Realms and the Human world. This is why Aquarius individuals think differently and are capable of ingenious ideas. They get those electrifying ideas from somewhere else. And so, being given so much talent and having so much fervour for change, if Aquarius isn’t meant to be humanist and charitable with its latent transformative prowess—what then becomes the meaning of its existence?

Aquarius magic of destruction - Knight of Cups Rx

Hmm yeah…when infantile and underdeveloped, Aquarius individuals are the world’s greatest emotional manipulators. Is that something to be proud of? Dunno. Aquarius is crazy anyway. This inability to connect to anybody on an emotional level causes Aquarius to have very little regard or respect for human emotions. Such an individual could become cruel to a point of turning into a serial killer even. Of course, there is no Aquarius who doesn’t know how to charm another, so that only adds to the danger of having one such person around.

Point of self-actualisation - Red Astronomer (Johannes Kepler)

Let it be known that the Star needs to focus on future events if it wishes to achieve satisfaction by the end of its incarnation. What this means, essentially, is that it would be wise for Aquarius to always carefully think about the consequences of its actions. Whether it is personal or professional; in private or public; Aquarius needs to think about its image. This isn’t mere image maintenance for no reason at all. Aquarius often doesn’t realise its own influence on others that cause others to want to look up to them. The Star may or may not like the attention—how others put burden and expectations on them—but it is what it is. And if the Star cares enough about leaving a positive legacy in the world, these are some of the important things to keep in mind.

☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・.

🎏Pisces Magic

The Star’s ultimate incarnation on Gaia. Is Pisces Human? Is it God? Is it a fairy? Or is it just energy? Dunno. Pisces is hard to pin down because it’s fishy. Symbolised by two fishes going in different directions whilst being tied at the tail, Pisces is schizophrenia and the world’s mania. It’s obsessive but hopeless because it’s lacking a backbone. It’s also ambitious but self-undoing due to a series of cowardly escapism. What the Star wishes to accomplish in its last incarnation is all-encompassing and this can cause it to lose balance all the time. Pulled in different directions; absorbed by all kinds of environment; manipulated by all kinds of hyenas Humans. Pisces desperately wants to be good but this ugly world ain’t letting it have it easy…

Pisces magic of creation - Priestess of Luxury

Yeah, this is literally saying: there’s nothing in this world you can’t have. I see it, I like it, I want it, I got it. Yup. With Pisces’s vast understanding of the ways of the Matrix world, it is the world’s Magician. If Pisces wants, it can manifest gold out of thin air. There is so much magic for creation and that is for helping the world. An accomplished Pisces who knows its own place in the world and all the ways and reasons it is different from the rest of the world possesses the power to make the world cower before its supreme Co-Creation prowess. The last standing challenge is only whether or not Pisces can allow itself to embrace such immense power.

Pisces magic of destruction - 6 of Pentacles Rx

When Pisces lives continuously in a cowardly manner, it quickly loses sight of its own manifestation power. It stops caring what power and manifestation mean because it is so immensely unhappy. Nothing in the world matters if Pisces is spiritually unsatisfied. Working is disappointing, socialising is disappointing, eating is disappointing, showering is disappointing, self-care is disappointing, making an effort is disappointing, loving and hating are disappointing, breathing itself is disappointing. There’s nothing left to share of itself because Pisces is just tired of Life…

Point of self-actualisation - Red Alchemist (John Dee)

-Okay, this is like the most fitting card that could appear for this part like OMG.-

The Star’s immense capacity for empathy is both a blessing to the world and a curse for itself. It requires a great deal of discipline for the Star to be able to protect itself from the negative consciousnesses of the Human Matrix. Problem is, protection is almost impossible given its empathy, so the next best thing for Pisces to do is constant distillation. To remove impurities from its system (energetic field) and maintain fresh, clean perspectives on the challenges of being Human. If the Star ignores this one key secret, it’ll only become a channel or medium for negative consciousnesses to manifest their destructive desires into this Matrix. That’s not very pretty. Given the last scores, it’ll be decided whether or not the Star has done well in serving its sentence for its past crimes. If the Star hasn’t learnt enough… who knows… it might have to be plunged into the whole cycle one more time~

☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・.

Feel free to support me on Patreon if you love this kind of content🍑I create stories and tarot readings that calm the mind & heal from within🍒

[Back to Masterlist] [Part 1]

#Punk Astro Tidbits #astro tidbits #astro notes #astro observations #astrology tidbits #astrology notes #astrology observations #astrology on tumblr #astroblr #tarotblr #writblr #witchblr #tarot witch #faery witch #faery #zodiac signs #personality #tarot #tarot pick a card #tarot reading

[luv4fandoms]

Invisible String story profiles

Lizzie is me/an OC and Ari is @arianamhm

Neteyam

-Is the point guard for the Pandora U basketball team

-Has already been scouted but isn't sure if that's what he wants to do with his life.

-Is a straight A student and has been almost his whole life.

-Can also play guitar

-Secretly loves to write love songs, but will only preform for family and close friends.

-Made Lo'ak take the video he secretly recorded of him off of his TikTok as soon as he found out...even if it had over a million likes already

-His own TikTok is videos of his games, his family, and him playing the guitar.

Lo'ak

-Is the shooting guard for the Pandora U basketball team

-Struggles with classes, not because he's stupid but because it doesn't hold his interest.

-Takes extra classes in things like art and music to make up points he gets taken off in his normal classes.

-Can play the drums and loves to meet up with friends when there is a "spray meet", pretty much a graffiti meetup where a bunch of people get together and spraypaint an area, these meetups are actually legal.

-Has quite the following on TikTok for his basketball and dance videos

Kiri

-Passes her classes without even trying honestly

-Is an art major

-Has been called an old soul since she was little and because of that is often a counselor for younger students

-Is spiritual and loves to go shopping for new crystals and herbs.

-Is all over witchtok, as both a watcher and creator

Ao'nung

-Captain of the Pandora U swim team

-Was born in Hawaii but he and his family moved when he was 15.

-Though he doesn't seem like the type to be studious, he is a straight A student.

-His father expects a lot of him, including taking over the family business

-Probably misses Hawaii more than Tsireya and Roxto

-Joined TikTok after Roxto told him how many views and likes the videos he had taken of the swim team got. He really only posts videos of him practicing. Other than that he reposts a lot of videos of Hawaii and Hawaiian culture.

Tsireya

-Is the captain of the girl's Pandora U swim team

-Misses Hawaii but also enjoys the shopping more now. About lost it the first time her, Ari and Kiri visited a five floor mall.

-Is also a straight A student.

-Unbenownst to Ao'nung, Tsireya and Roxto went on a couple of dates but ultimately decided they were better off as friends.

-Low-key has a crush on Lo'ak

-Purchased one of those silicone mermaid tails and is known as the Reef Auli'i on TikTok by many. Mainly does shout-outs to children who comment and tell her how much they love her and how they always knew mermaids were real.

-She also does videos of traditional Hawaiian dances

Roxto

-Is also on the Pandora U swim team

-Along with Ao'nung, Neteyam, and Lo'ak, is one of the most popular boys in school.

-Much prefers to be at the pool or at the beach surfing than anywhere else, but will cruise the town with his friends also.

-Has had a crush on Kiri since he first met her

-Even though most of the guys on the swim team are labeled as "players". Everyone knows Roxto is a hopeless romantic sweetheart.

-The king of surf videos, his TikTok is mainly videos of the waves he catches. But he does also join in Lo'ak's dance videos

Spider

-Grew up with the Sully kids as their adopted brother

-His mother died soon after he was born and his father was a military man who went MIA for many years. Jake Sully and his father served together and did not get along at all due to his father's lack of morals.

-After living with his father for a year once he returned he decided to move back to attend Pandora U with the Sully's

-Loves the outdoors and would much prefer to be outside in nature

-Would love to either be a photographer or work with animals.

-Has had a crush on Kiri since they were little.

-Is also an art major

-Does a lot of videos with the others for tiktoks, but for ones he makes he tends to make nature or animals based videos. Compilation videos of different shots of different flowers or deep in the woods, deer he comes across, or other wildlife.

Ari

-Has known the Sully kids the longest (besides Spider)

-Went to middle and highschool with them before going to Pandora U as well. Highschool was when she met the Hawaiian transfer students.

-Vibes the most with Lo'ak, and that often leads to trouble for both of them

-Is a good student even when she doesn't nessasaily want to be at school

-Low-key a lot of people in school steer clear of making her mad because she is grade A scary when she's mad.

-Is the queen of dance Tiktoks and is often seen in Lo'aks videos along with Roxto

-Loves to go shopping with the girls

-Low-key has a crush on both Lo'ak and Neteyam

Lizzie

-Moved only a couple of months ago, so she's still a very new student to Pandora U and the area.

-Instantly clicked with Kiri since they are both art majors and old souls

-Got quickly brought into the friends group after she met Ari who introduced her to everyone

-Would much rather be outside painting, drawing, or crocheting then in a crowded mall

-That being said, she will still go shopping with the girls when they ask

-Won't ever mention it but she does find all of the boys attractive in their own ways, but she sees them all as good friends

-But she does have a crush on Ao'nung

-Runs her own Etsy shop where she sells her crafts.

-Her TikTok is mainly artsy stuff, does a lot of diy/the process of videos. Or transition videos from supplies to product to show off things she's selling. She also does nature compilation videos that have a very cottagecore/whimsigoth/goblincore vibe

© to @luv4fandoms tumblr; do not repost or steal

#avatar au #human avatar #avatar twitter #neteyam #lo'ak #kiri #ao'nung #Tsireya #roxto #spider #oc #original character #self insert #avatar smau #twt smau #awotw smau #avatar college au #college au

[bookishthoughst]

My favourite Ari & Dante quotes:

The problem with my life was that it was someone else's idea.

As far as I was concerned, the sun could have melted the blue right off the sky. Then the sky would be as miserable as I was.

I decided to go swimming at the Memorial Park pool. It was a small idea. But at least the idea was mine.

It was better to be alone and miserable. It was better to drown.

We laughed. We always laughed.

I got to thinking that poems were like people. Some people you got right off the bat. Some people you just didn't get--and never would get.

I didn't care about what they meant. I didn't care because what mattered is that Dante's voice felt real. And I felt real.

Words were different when they lived inside of you.

"You said don't drown--so I found someone to help me keep my promise."

Dante. I really liked him. I really, really liked him.

And I wondered what my dad looked like when he was my age. My mother had told me he was beautiful. I wonder if he'd been as beautiful as Dante. And I wondered why I thought that.

I wanted to tell her that happy was hard for me. But I think she already knew that. "Well," I said, "I'm at that phase where I'm supposed to be miserable."

I didn't care for Aristotle either. And even though I knew I was named after my grandfather, I also knew I had inherited the name of the world's most famous philosopher. I hated that. Everyone expected something from me. Something I just couldn't give. So I renamed myself Ari. If I switched the letter, my name was Air. I thought it might be a great thing to be air. I could be something and nothing at the same time. I could be necessary and also invisible. Everyone would need me and no one would be able to see me.

But Mr. Quintana was brave. He didn't care if the whole world knew he was kind.

Before she left, Mrs. Quintana took my face between her two hands, looked right into my eyes, and whispered, "Aristotle Mendoza, I will love you forever."

My mother and father held hands. I wondered what that was like, to hold someone's hand. I bet you could sometimes find all the mysteries of the universe in someone's hand.

"I went swimming today," he said. "How was it?" "I love swimming." "I know," I said. "I love swimming," he said again. He was quiet for a little while. And then he said, "I love swimming--and you." I didn't say anything. "Swimming and you, Ari. Those are the things I love the most."

"I love the rain," my mother whispered. I love it too. I love it too. I felt like I was the saddest boy in the universe. Summer had come and gone. Summer had come and gone. And the world was ending.

I learned how to swim this summer. No, that's not true. Someone taught me. Dante. I tore out the page.

I'd figured something out about myself: on the inside, I wasn't like my dad at all. On the inside I was more like Dante. That really scared me.

"That's a very Dante question," I said. "That's a very Ari answer," he said. And then we started laughing and couldn't stop. And I missed him so much.

"What about your party?" "Watching you loosen up, Ari. That's a party. We'll even score the beer for you," she said. "To celebrate the end of school."

When I stopped the truck, I got out, slamming the door . "Shit! I forgot about the beer." "We don't need the beer," Dante whispered. "We need the beer! We need the fucking beer, Dante!" I don't know why I was yelling. The yelling turned into sobs. I fell into Dante's arms and cried. He held me and didn't say a word. Another secret of the universe: Sometimes pain was like a storm that came out of nowhere. The clearest summer morning could end in a downpour. Could end in lightning and thunder.

The summer sun was not meant for boys like me. Boys like me belonged to the rain.

Dante laughed. "I wasn't really kissing Daniel. In my head, I was kissing you." I shrugged. "You got to get yourself a new head, Dante."

what do you love, Ari? What do you really love?" "I love the desert. God, I love the desert." "It's so lonely." "Is it?" Dante didn't understand. I was unknowable.

my father nodded. "Ari, the problem isn't just that Dante's in love with you. The real problem--for you, anyway--is that you're in love with him."

"Try it again," I said. "Kiss me." "No," he said. "Kiss me." "No." And then he smiled. "You kiss me."

How could I have ever been ashamed of loving Dante Quintana?

#aristotle and dante discover the secrets of the universe #aristotle mendoza #dante quintana #ari and dante #benjamin alire sáenz #literature #books #book quotes #bookmark #sam quintana #favorite quotes #I know it's a lot #please bear with me #queer pride #queer story #queer artwork #june #pride month