#and we've never gotten so many asks at once!! that made me so happy you have no idea

[the-unicorn-system]

tamago means egg btw and no im not adding pee to the list :sob:

#rottmnt #rottmnt poll #rottmnt au #rottmnt fic #rottmnt fic au #rottmnt au fic #rottmnt future leo #rottmnt leo #peepaw multiverse #peepaw leo fanfic #rottmnt time travel fic #led astray #la #they say the past is gone forever #yall all fr went “NAME HIM PEE” #we did really need that laugh tho i genuinely thank you guys #and we've never gotten so many asks at once!! that made me so happy you have no idea #woomy post #spread this around!! name the boy!!!

[fashion-runways]

okay it's been over a year and i keep saying i'm going to make a new post and it's too exhausting to even think about the whole thing so i keep pushing it-- here's the link to the old post if you want a more detailed thing i wrote back then.

anyway, a year ago, out of the blue, our apartment got raided by the police, they broke our front door, they broke a bunch of shit inside, they took a bunch of our stuff, they barely gave us answers or an explanation, they took my dad and made it seem like he would have to sign some stuff and answer some questions and come back, but it's been over a year (since june 2022) and he hasn't come back, and his case is still up in the air. they're barely working on it. they didn't pay for all the shit they broke, they haven't returned all the shit they took, we had to spend a lot of money on that, i had to take a loan to buy a new computer so i could keep working and studying, on top of spending even more money on basic needs for my dad in jail and lawyers, plus blood pressure and anxiety medications, plus he's old and he was scheduled an eye surgery that he obviously couldn't go to so he's like, practically blind in one eye now, also new clothes for him to wear there (there's a bunch of rules for that), honestly i already lost track of how many things we had to pay for. it's been incredibly stressful and it still is even now that we've gotten used to it. he's been detained for a year for something that they still don't even know if he did and the case is barely moving, i don't know if they're like... i don't know, waiting for the man to die in there since he's already old so they don't have to admit they don't have enough proof for all the mess they made? i don't know. like i said back then, please don't ask me for details on the case or show up in my inbox trying to play tiktok true crime and guess what he did/didn't do. it happened a few times and it's extremely triggering, please don't. please.

this blog is basically my job. it's my primary source of income, i don't have anything else, no matter how many interviews i go to, in the country/city i live and in the state our economy is, if you don't have contacts it's impossible to get a job. i'm always signing up to free programs to learn new things while i don't have a job, try to make my cv bigger, but it doesn't matter. if you don't have someone saying “please hire my friend/family member” or you don't have 500 years of experience, they won't. so like i said, donations people make to this blog are how me and my mom (and my pets) stay afloat. it's what we use to pay for food, general groceries, transportation, electricity, wifi, water, gas, health insurance, stuff for my dad in jail, meds for my mom who has diabetes, food and meds for my pets. i don't go out much, i haven't gotten a haircut in a year, i barely spend money in anything that makes me happy except once in a blue moon when i stop feeling guilty lmao i had a redbubble account also that helped a little too, but last week it got suspended without an explanation as i was uploading new designs, so i don't even have that now. i made a new account on teepublic, but all my designs in high quality are locked behind redbubble and i can't even log into because of the suspension. it's... complicated, and it's a lot, but it is what it is.

i'm always keeping an eye out on new collections, new designers, new cool things. like i said, i love fashion, i studied fashion, and i know a lot of you use this blog as inspiration whether it's for yourselves or for your art, so i don't want to post all similar stuff all the time, i want to post all kinds of styles and brands as much as i can. which is why when i say if you like this blog, if you want to support me, sending even the smallest amount of money helps me keep going. living in latin america, the exchange rate is kind of insane, so truly any amount of money donated helps. unfortunately, i never stop needing money to survive and help keep my family afloat, but in the past year more than ever.

as usual, my kofi link is this one: https://ko-fi.com/fashionrunways and my (new) teepublic link is this one: https://www.teepublic.com/user/dinah-lance. if my redbubble account gets reinstated, i'll add that link eventually too. and as always, thanks for loving this blog and for loving fashion like i love fashion, even when i post crazy looking stuff, and thanks for helping. you have no idea how much your support helps, but it really does, i don't even know if i'd be alive right now if it wasn't for this blog.

#text posts #long post.

[icallhimjoey]

Q&A things, here we go:

this is joe's first time in philly

joe said his life has changed immensely and that it's so nice to have a character that's so loved, it's beyond what he could have ever imagined

joe knew the eddie book was going to come out, he's on board with it, is involved with it, is excited about it but doesn't know much else

for the most epic theme song for his life, joe chose heroes by david bowie

joe just sat and waited for is passport to be found, didnt go "through hell" like the moderator suggested

if eddie got a spin-off, joe asked if it could be with chrissy and thinks they'd be a good duo

when asked what crimes their characters would be fighting, joe said he thinks eddie would take it very seriously (whereas grace mentioned she thinks it'll be scooby-doo funny and they'd solve nothing)

joe on eddie: eddie represents the outsider and is on the fringes of society and becomes a hero, it's brave to be different and brave to be yourself.

joe watched the peep show whilst filming st4

joe has not seen are you being served

joe mentioned set shenanigans, said it was funny to see grace in a harnes just hanging there

he mentioned how natalia is good a photoshop again

joe starts filming gladiator 2 next month and doesnt know if he's allowed to use his own accent

joe wants to use his own accent for gladiator 2

about eddie becoming kas, joe said no one has called him, but theoretically it could happen - probably won't, but it could

joe got to pick all the eddie tattoos himself, and he just picked the ones he thought looked good

when he picked the bats he didnt realize his demise

he was wearing pink socks, idk, felt like i should mention

joe's stepdad was a camera man, his mum worked in tv promotion, so joe would go into work with them and see that it was the most extraordinary place, he wanted to be a part of that

joe says you need good stamina for theater, and that you don't get paid well for doing theater

joe's scared to do a shakespeare play bc 'we all know how they end'

grace said joe should be used to dying by now

joe's never going to get used to seeing his face on so many things but he loves the creativity

joe is happy so many people have the eddie guitar, but doesnt feel like a rockstar (he did when filming that scene, but thats it)

joe loves all the heartfelt letters he receives, feels that it's more than something physical

Joe likes F Scott Fitzgerald

would love to play in something set in the 1920 bc he wants to be a flapper girl

joe had a cheesesteak for dinner last night

joe thinks eddie wouldnt have gotten into college, but instead would have been a rockstar - eddie would have made it

also said that eddie and chrissy would've been friends

joe has played DnD once, and we've all seen it, said he'd like to play again

asked for a bar recommendation from the moderator, bc why not, you know?

(big massive fat thanks to @jo-harrington who sent me live updates throughout the whole thing)

#joe quinn #joseph quinn

[underwhelp]

Waiting For The Inevitable

A Fanfiction of @rotworld 's amazing original work, Meanwolves

If Vanagandr practiced the old ways, a not so happy ending for a human that tries an escape.

Warnings: 🔞 Non-con, kidnapping, blood mentioned, cannibalism implied

You had never planned on escaping, sure you'd watched the comings and goings of the wolves, even looked out for the van keys but it wasn't until the mayhem of a new person to torture happened, that you actually got the chance to run, so you took it.

You'd gotten away with only the shirt on your back, the one they made all the humans wear with the crude writing, so when you made it to a house, you snatched some clothes and ran some more.

You never spoke of anything that had happened to you for fear of being dragged back. You didn't even go home, you just rang your family and apologized for worrying them.

You kept to yourself, it was hard to get your feet back on the ground after being nothing more than a pet for the better part of two years. No papers, you found a job that didn't need any. You slept in the storage room of the diner that hired you and saved what money you could for a backpack and clothes. It was weeks before you tried looking for accommodation, a halfway house worse than you'd thought it would be. You didn't sleep, couldn't, but you were free.

Break times and any silence was plagued with the alpha's stories of old, of what would happen to the humans that strayed, you knew what would come your way when they found you.

You kept an ear and eye out for wolves. You knew not everyone of them was connected to your alpha but you still listened to how someone spoke or watched if they sniffed the air.

Anxiety was all you knew, keeping your collar high enough to cover the scars of ownership was a task all on its own, you often wondered how many people would recognise them if they saw.

You thought that maybe the loneliness was the worst part. They'd taken you from your life, one you didn't feel you could go back to and a forced community was still that, a community. Being under their paws meant no alone time. After that all, the only people you spoke to were your coworkers while on the clock and your grandmother once a week by phone.

The morning they came for you was on the four month anniversary of your freedom.

You'd taken the early shift, six to eleven saw mostly truckers. You immediately recognized the two men that walked in that day and sat near the door. Your hands shook, you'd slipped into the kitchen and tried to think of an escape plan, but none of it mattered when you'd opened the rear door and found that it wasn't two wolves, but three and this particular were was one you definitely never wanted to see again.

You couldn't have run, it probably would've excited them more, so you waited for Druian to make the first move. The other two came around the corner when he opened the backdoor to the van.

"If you don't move," it was more of a growl from Druian's mouth, your eyes met before yours dropped. A forced habit. "It'll be worse for you."

The two that were in the back with you had been the same ones that had taken you that fateful night, Druian in particular was the one that had drugged you, was the first to take you. This bright morning had them quiet, the silence and ignorance was loud.

It looked like a straight track home, you huffed out a laugh at the thought. Ralph asked you what was so funny, his pale eyes glinted under a dark brow. You used to think he was the prettiest of the bunch, in that van, knowing your fate, looking at his face dried your mouth.

You ignored the question and asked how they had found you.

"A prospect human had your sent all over them," Druian gruffly said, his face turned away from you, you wondered if he was disappointed by his bad choice. "We've known where you were for five weeks."

They'd known all that time, haunting you.

"Why not just kill me," you shrugged out, shaking your head "why all this nonsense?"

They were deadly still, like the motion of the vans movements didn't touch them. They didn't answer you, even when you asked again. You figured you were enemy number one, and deserved what was coming.

When the van came apon the sign indicating you were close, the air fizzled, the wolves had been agitated the whole time but it only escalated then. Druian was the one that dragged you out, his hand on your should as the they matched you to a clearing far behind the main communal building.

There you saw the crowd, the human that started this all was there amongst the wolves. Most were naked, some half shifted like they'd started and hadn't finished. The alpha stood in the middle, naked and broad, behind him was a table and fire pit, you took a deep, shaky breath.

It smelt the same, you'd lived through and seen the seasons, felt the air as the leaves changed, died and regrew. This place was beautiful, you could've seen yourself happy here, but no matter how hard you tried, it creeped back in just how much they had taken from you.

Your clothes were ripped off, the elastic of your underwear left welts. The chilled air pebbled your nipples but it was Vanagandr's steely gaze that sent shivers down your spine.

The alpha started to shift then, you'd never seen it so slow and you knew that he was doing it to scare you further. Scarred, tattooed flesh gave way to a hunking mass of hair that rushed you. You hadn't known he'd hit you until your back was on the ground and felt pain in your chest, he'd clawed at you, deep gauges that bled profusely. He roared into your face before clamping down on your shoulder with his maw. An image of a rabid dog shaking a child came to mind, and you'd wondered if he'd take the whole thing, bone and all with him.

Then he pulled back, blood spraying across your face, his body had shifted to that half man creature that haunted your dreams before he flipped you into you front and then, he was in you, using your body.

You'd screamed, wailed, the taste of salt from your tears and blood filled your mouth. Your fingers curled into the muck beneath you, pine needles wedged under nails.

You lifted your head to look up, the humans avoided you eyes but the wolves relished in your suffering. Huffing and puffing at the display their alpha put on, most were erect but didn't touch themselves. All those years of good behaviour and loving touches gone. Their true colours always showed when they had prey under them.

You spotted Linden in the fray, his face hidden by the shadow of the tall trees behind him, you reached a filthy hand toward him, he never moved from his spot.

There's wasn't enough lubrication to make it pleasurable, even for Vanagandr but it was the pain and agony he needed to get off.

It lasted longer than you thought it would, your throat was raw and your chest ached as dirt was packed into the wounds. He didn't cum just ripped his cock from your bloody hole and pulled you up by your hair. Your body was thrown onto the craving table, the alpha's breath was sour with your blood as he snarled into your face.

"You have a choice," you heard more growling from the crowd. " You become fuel for the very ones you betrayed or you take everyone for as long as they'll have you and I'll bring you back into the fold." His clawed hand was in your hair, other bodies had surrounded you at this stage.

These were your choices, be eaten or fucked to death? The pain had made it hard to keep your eyes focused on Vanagandr's. At one time this man had convinced you that you were loved, the same alpha started at you with hate. They hated you, so you choose your only option.

"Fuck you, my Alpha." You spat through the blood and snot.

Vanagandr smiled, it was awful, his mouth stretched wider with too many sharp teeth, "I always knew what was under all that meekness." He reared back and shouted out that there would be a feast.

You fought the dizzy haze and turned your head to look around again, the humans were in shock. You were one of them, someone that shared the same pain, cried and kept secrets with.

Now, they'd have to eat you.

Two wolves ran off to start the fire, the alpha didn't need a knife, he had his own tools.

As you layed bare and in agony, the blood pooling under you, your eyes turned back to the faces staring down at you of the wolves that stole you away. You thought of all the times they'd laughed with you, showed you the best spots to watch the stars, caressed your body, it was all so fucking sad. Your eyes watered, you thought of your grandmother who would wait for a call that would never come.

Your alpha lifted his hand, shining vicious claws and your eyes closed for the final time.

I added an oc because I didn't think Sawyer would just jump in the van for a runaway pick up.

#fanfiction #Meanwolves #werewolves #monster fucker #Druian #Vanagandr #Linden #werewolf x reader #fanfic

[redheadspark]

August Prompt Session

Hello, my lovelies! I haven't done a prompt session in some time, and since Summer is rolling on by (along with the massive heatwave we are in) I figured we could dive back into another prompt session for August!

This new prompt session's theme is:

Vacation

Here are my rules:

1.) You may choose ONE character from the list that I have Here. It’ll have the list of characters that I write for or have written for in the past.

*(If you have a character not listed that you wish for me to write, PLEASE MESSAGE ME AND CLEAR IT WITH ME FIRST TO SEE IF I CAN OR WILL DO IT!)*

2.) There is One Prompt list for this session and since the list is rather large, please provide BOTH the number you would like AND the character to pair it with.

Example: Can I have Aziel from ACOTAR with #5?

*I write out the requests as first come first serve. I will try my best to fulfill every request that comes my way, but please bear in mind I work full-time as a teacher. Because of that, I’ll be busy most of the day so please be patient and I’ll write in my spare time as much as I can :) *

3.) If I get two requests that are exactly the same, (same character and same number) I will only write it once! Please don't be afraid to ask if someone has already requested the character and number, I don't mind answering that for you :)

4.) You can request in my ASK box neither as yourself or anonymously. Although I would LOVE to give you a shout if you request as yourself, anon is perfectly fine!

5.) I will stop taking requests for this prompt session on Sunday, August 6th, at 3:00 PST.

6.) Have fun and enjoy!

Prompts made by @urfriendlywriter and @novelbear

"god, it's so hot out."

taking the vacation's plans as an opportunity to teach their partner a skill they don't know yet (like how to swim, surf, fish, etc.)

"should i buy these?" "you have like five of those at home." "but they're not from here!"

commenting about the overpowering smell of sunscreen/mosquito repellant that the other constantly uses

pictures. pictures. pictures.

"Aw, come on. a little water won't hurt!"

"since when did you know how to barbecue?" "i always have. i've just never gotten the chance to cook for you like this..."

piggy back rides when one gets tired from walking for so long

"oh, can we go on that one? please?"

"i have sand. everywhere."

putting sunscreen on for each other

maybe one has been to their chosen spot before and is so excited to show the other their favorite places

^ and of course, their lover finds their excitement absolutely adorable

"the lady over there just asked if we were a couple." "well, we did just kiss." "i know but it's still cool that we've finally been asked, don't you think?"

trying to find those little souvenirs with their names on it

^ and making it a little game to find a product with their name first

sharing drinks with two straws and being all cute

"how many swimsuits did you bring." "all of them."

complimenting them with every single outfit change of the trip

late night beach walks >>>

Once again, I will not take any more requests after Sunday, August 6th, at 3:00 PST. Thanks and Happy writing!

Tagged - @a-lumos-in-the-nox @basicrese @ethereal-athalia @reallysparklychaos @heartofwritiing @botanicalbarnes @virtueassassin @heliosphere8 @saradika

#azriel acotar #azriel x you #eddie munson x you #Eddie munson x reader #shang chi fanfiction #shang chi x reader #druig x reader #jack russell x you #werewolf by night fanfiction #eternals fanficiton #marvel cinematic universe fanfiction #stranger things fanfiction #azriel shadowsinger #azriel x female reader #barry keoghan x reader #joseph quinn x reader #jack russell x reader #benedict Bridgerton x reader #eternals fanfiction #oliver wood x reader #oliver wood fanfiction #din djarin x female reader #mandolarian fanfiction #writing #fanfiction #druig #eternals #joseph quinn #eddie munson #barry keoghan

[maxemilianverstappen]

I am not tagged by anyone, but I am going to do this, with not just one fic, but several, and not just a line but some paragraphs:

Rules: In a new post, show the last line/paragraph(s) you wrote (or drew) and tag as many people as there are words (or however many you like)

This one is from a lestappen fic:

"Why would even Atlas pity you? You think you deserve it because what you're shouldering is too heavy for anyone to carry or because you think you martyred yourself for the sake of it? Have you forgotten that you chose to shoulder it all too willingly? Have you forgotten how much pride you were taking from the name Il Predestinato? Wouldn't you have called it a glorious burden if you had won, instead of just a deadweight as it feels like now? Don't be so conceited.

Yes, at first, I thought you were a victim of your circumstances, always suffering even for a sliver of happiness. But you crave it. You think unless you suffer for it, it is not grand enough and worthwhile of your time. You secretly boast of your perseverance in pursuit of perfection. It has become a defining aspect of you, and now you can't think of satisfaction and perfection without sufferage. You do not want to be saved from it. You think you have to hild onto it to feel alive. But we've unknowingly provided you with a means to destroy yourself faster with it."

This one is from another Lestappen fic:

"There is an infinite number of ways to arrive at the inevitable. Today, which way do you want to try? Which way would you like to exhaust?" The demon asked, clad in Sebastian's skin. The half bored half deprecating look in his eyes was judging Charles even more severely each new time he came face to face with him in this void. "Are you thick in here?" He spat, lips drawn back and showing his sharp teeth in disgust. "When will you realize you can't change the inevitable? When will you realize you can't have both things at once? Or do you no longer want to be what you have been desiring for so long, so strongly that it drew me to you?"

Charles looked back at the demon and held the manic blue eyes with determination, even though something was dying inside of him at each new try and each new attempt. "Never." He refuted firmly. "That's the bane of my existence."

Sebastian regarded him with contempt at first, and then his expression turned into gleeful sadism as he slowly walked up to Charles and pressed a talon-like finger onto his chest. "Then, he can stay dead. That's his destiny. For as long as you want that trophy, he has to die for it. And you have to watch him crash himself against walls for you to achieve your dream."

Sickness brewed inside Charles's stomach like some poison, but he kept the bile inside by holding onto his rage. He snarled at the youthful face of the Redbull's first golden boy, even though his eyes were filled with unshed tears. "There has to be a way." He bit through his gritted teeth. "There has to be a way to undo this. And I will find it!"

Sebastian snorted at the defiance, finding it both pathetic and irritating. "Go and try again, then." He pushed Charles back with inhuman strength and Charles violently woke up to the same day, panting and whining at his fate, the tears now falling. 

This is from a Seb/FemKimi fic:

Well, it was typical of Sebastian to smash the fastest lap in the final lap after losing on a highly possible win, but Kimi didn't voice it. "Look at the standings…" She pointed at the large TV screen in the room, and true to Lewis' guess, Sebastian had gotten the fastest lap.

The broadcast showed a part of his purple sectored lap and then cut into the parc ferme camera to show the moment he was out of his car and walking away, wacking his gloves right at himself as an expression of his disappointed anger, right onto the side of his helmet. She could almost hear the cracking sound the heavy gloves made against the metal, feeling herself getting goosebumps just from watching it even though the weather was quite hot.

Oh, he was angry… She could barely resist biting on her lower lip, seeing that show of irritation doing things to her. Well then, she should do her best, too, right?

This is from a Simi fic:

This life that he had chosen for himself felt like a huge mistake because he was something else in his dreams.

Is all that we see or seem, but a dream within a dream?

He didn't remember the first time he saw himself in his dream. Nobody did, possibly. Because why should it be counted as a special occasion, a milestone? People dreamt of all kinds of strange stuff anyways; so, occasionally watching themselves reenact their daily lives in different ways or dig out their subconscious for a face off was not a strange occurrence. Seeing their own reflection in a mirror or watching themselves as if they were out of their body had to have felt strange at first, but then, people would get used to it. And if it happened again later on, they'd just shrug it off and forget about it soon. Just the way the human mind was supposed to work...

Yet, there was an anomaly here. Something strange… Because after a while, after observing himself closely, Sebastian realized he didn't know who the Sebastian that he saw in his dreams was.

#tag game #whoever sees this can do it #long post #eri.fanfic

[catsafarithewriter]

A/N: @tcrmommabear YOU HAPPY NOW? <3<3<3

Also: part 7. Let's see if we can hit double digits before I get poll powers.

x

"No ribbon, no wedding," the clerk announced. At least, Haru assumed he was the clerk. He'd introduced himself as merely 'Natoru' and completely bypassed any meaningful title.

He hadn't stopped smiling once since they'd arrived.

"But we don't mind about the ribbon," Haru wheedled. "Can't we just get married without it?"

"Mind?" the clerk echoed. "Mind?" His paws went to his hips with all the outrage his diminutive size would allow. "It's not about minding, it's about tradition! It's about the romance and the heritage. What will you tell your grandkittens when they ask of your whirlwind engagement?"

Haru and Baron studiously didn't make eye contact with one another.

"Perhaps you have spares?" Baron suggested.

"Spares? In this economy?" the Cat blustered. "We've been flooded with weddings this past week, we don't have spares."

Privately, Haru wondered just how many Humans the palace advisor had suggested the solution of temporary matrimony to.

"I'm starting to think kids these days don't have any respect for Cat tradition."

"Well, that's it," Haru said, seizing upon an idea. "I'm not a Cat. And Human weddings don't need ribbon."

Natoru's whiskers twitched. Haru allowed herself to believe that her ploy had worked, when, "But they do require rings."

"Not all of them–"

"No, no, I remember now – Humans wear rings for their weddings, how quaint."

Recognising the clerk's mind as stubbornly made up, Haru turned to Baron. "I don't suppose you have – no, of course you don't, because you have..." she stared at his gloves, "paws..."

Baron took a moment to register her distraction, but flexed his fingers when he did. "Human ancestry," he explained. "But, tragically, still no rings. Why are you making that face?"

"What face? I'm not making a face," Haru said.

"If you had whiskers, they'd be bunched."

Haru did her best to unwrinkle her nose. "I've lived in the Cat Kingdom for the past five years, Baron; I think I've just gotten unused to seeing hands."

"You have hands."

"Yes, but they're, you know, attached to me."

There was a not-unsubtle cough from across the room, and both of them remembered the clerk. The tan Cat stood there cheerfully, as if the two proclaimed lovebirds hadn't just been noticing one another's hands for the first time. "So?" he asked. "What's the verdict?"

"Oh!" Haru dug her hand into her bag and pulled out a small jewellery pouch. "I don't have actual rings, but I do have..." She hoisted out a pair of hoop earrings. "And, voila."

"Very nice," Baron said dutifully.

"They're presents from a friend," Haru explained. "Not exactly my sort of style, so never had the need to wear them, but..." She slipped one experimentally onto her finger. It was a little loose, but could – possibly – pass for a ring. She looked to the clerk. "Now will you marry us?"

"Me?" Natoru echoed. "Of course not! I'm only able to officiate Cat weddings! For a Human wedding, you'll have to go back to the Human World!"

"If you attack a palace staff member," Baron whispered, reading correctly the tilt of Haru's shoulders, "you'll certainly get thrown out of the Cat Kingdom."

"Worth it," Haru muttered, but she managed to straighten her shoulders without tossing Natoru out of the nearest window. "So without a ribbon, there's no way we can get married here?"

The clerk considered this, still smiling. "That's about the size of it, yes."

"You're sure we can't just... write an IOU?" she offered desperately. "Promise to get one later at the soonest conveni– no, okay."

"No ribbon, no wedding." Then, evidently feeling a tad too harsh, the Cat added encouragingly, "It doesn't have to be a fancy ribbon. Just any piece of long fabric will do. Why, the previous couple married using a hair... ribbon..." He trailed off, staring at Baron's neck.

No. Not Baron's neck.

At his bowtie.

"Ah," said Baron.

#double fake dating au #for what its worth i do love natoru's character #hes so chaotic in such a good natured way

[sol-consort]

Well now that it seems like you’ve gotten past Legion’s sacrifice I can say the part I left out of Legion’s pronoun ask

(If you haven’t seen the scene where they speak about what Legion says before sacrificing themself stop reading this ask)

Using singular pronouns like he/him are also ok because he refers to himself as I before sacrificing himself. Although the Geth most likely have like no gender so they/them is probably still the most accurate but I don’t think the Geth would care if you called them he/him or she/her

ALL GETH NON-GENDER CONFORMING LET'S GOOO!!! NEVER SEEN A RACE WITH SO MUCH RIZZ <33

And god it was a punch to the gut- how did I grow more and more in love with the geth?

Maybe when the game was released, this mission and A.I seemed like futuristic cyber fantasy but with the current times, it's growing more and more closer for comfort. Like I have how many years left to live, 60? And A.I is evolving, I might even get to witness the first prototype of an actual artificial intelligence that's not just a predication and logistics algorithm.

And that mission where you connect to the geth network and get to see their memories, see them being cared for by their creators. God that one geth asking what they have done wrong when they were being shut down really hit deep in my heart, like a child asking their mom why she's leaving, did they do something wrong? Can they fix it? Please don't leave me.

The fear of A.I replacing organic life has been one for debating since the day humans made the first ever computer. And it is reality, this is a real life issue the future will face. It's not a matter of if we create semi-sentient machines, it's a matter of when. People are trying and they will keep trying.

There is even this famous qoute:

"Man becomes, as it were, the sex organs of the machine world, as the bee of the plant world, enabling it to fecundate and to evolve ever new forms. The machine world reciprocates man's love by expediting his wishes and desires, namely, in providing him with wealth."

By Marshall Mcluhan.

Because we are the reproductive organs of the machines, the ones who will create them. The machines need organics to reach existence, they're simply not something that happens by nature.

And look at our machines so far, we've created them based on our own image. Sent them to space and names them curiosity, preservence, spirit and opportunity. These are real names for the NASA mars rovers.

We gave taught them how to sing happy birthday for themselves, all alone in space because we imagined how alone it must be, we wanted to comfort the metal that could reach worlds beyond our body's could ever handle.

But we're also scared, we're flawed and know that we are flawed. We are scared of them not needing us anymore, realising how weak and bad we can get, how we don't have a purpose in this world. We are scared they will not love us back, that they will leave us to rot in the wasteland we've turned the earth into instead of being the ones to lift us up into newer planets.

And the geth mission just made me sad man. It's like a parent shunning the child that loved them, and the child simply doesn't understand why their parents don't like them. They're just so innocent and their world view is so pure that they come to the conclusion any child would.

That they must've done something wrong, for how could the ones who gifted you life be the ones to forcefully take it away, look at you as if you were a monster when once you were beautiful in their eyes.

Ik it's a game but I really hope by the time a breakthrough in technology gets made that we can replicate even an ant's mind artificially, then we would be kinder parents to them than the quarians ever were to the geth. I hope humanity matures enough by that time.

10000/10 writing, hand in marriage for whoever wrote that Geth mission conclusion. It actually ranks even over Tuchanka for me because of how grey and muddy it is. It fully depends on your own views as a person and if you think organic life is superior. There is no clear right or wrong. For once it is the human playing the game who has to ask themselves what they believe in.

[captain-hen]

hi again!! i realized i never updated you with my thoughts on s6, so here they are, rapid-fire style:

overall i think episodes one and two were very weak, but the rest of the season has been pretty decent. 6A was definitely my least favorite batch of episodes if i had to pick, but watching it all at once wasn't that bad and 6B has been very promising so far.

athena's cold case episode was really sad and unsettling, but i'm glad they did it and i'm very happy that she got to have that closure and revisit the case that made her want to be a cop. that's actually one thing i've been really liking about s6, that we've gotten to go back and tie up a lot of old threads from previous seasons.

the noah storyline was really weird and imo it should have been a longer arc with a better payoff for him. he wasn't a bad guy and i'm a little sad about the way they treated him.

idk what it is about maddie and chimney but i feel like their relationship has been a little off in 6A. i liked all of their domestic scenes with jee-yun, but i also think some things were very rushed (like the scene where they got back together). maybe it's just that they didn't get a lot of screentime? 6B has been better though and i'm glad the writers are finding their groove with them again.

on a brighter note, season six eddie is making me very happy. after his breakdown in 5B, he seems so much more at ease and more comfortable in his skin now and i'm so proud of him :)

hen might be my favorite character this season. her trying to do so much in episodes one and two, failing and having a breakdown but then convincing the prof to give her another chance and nailing it, and then eventually deciding that being a doctor wasn't what her real dream was and that her family was more important? i loved every second of it, and i think that aisha hinds's performance was nothing short of magnificent. i also loved the henren flashbacks!!

i kind of wish that they'd brought in the priest from s1 or another old character instead of wendall for that storyline. i enjoyed it regardless and i really loved all of the grant-nash family scheming, but i think it wouldve been more impactful if we had actually already known this character instead of just pretending like he'd been here the whole time. it's not a huge complaint though bc i do think bobby saving tamara and shutting down that fake rehab center was very healing for him....and did i mention how much i loved the grant-nash stuff? if there's one thing season 6 is doing right, it's the grant-nash dynamic. i miss michael and harry, but everything with bobby, may, and athena has been amazing.

sorry for the long ask, i just have so many things to say 😭 and i have even more to say about 6B + the buddie of it all, including the sperm donor plot, so that's gonna be a separate ask!!

-NewTo911Anon

hi again! i mostly agree with all of this! i actually thought 6x01 and 6x02 were two of the better episodes of the season, so i'm surprised you didn't like them (though i do understand that the blimp call was disappointing). the devil you know was SUCH a good episode, same as tommorow, and you're absolutely right that hen's arc has been the best one this season!

i agree with you about maddie and chimney: the premier was promising for them, but they just kind of...settled back into their relationship with each other with no bigger hurdles? i was hoping for there to be a little more of them having to work things out; i appreciated that 6x01 showed their lingering insecurities, but...idk. unlike the other seasons, they really haven't had a proper arc this season (as of yet). even maddie has just kinda been drifting from episode to episode, and hasn't really had a proper storyline, which is very uncharacteristic of the show.

home invasion and what's your fantasy have been the weakest episodes imo, and i completely agree with you about the noah arc; it could have been a really good storyline for maddie to mentor another dispatcher while trying to adjust to being back at work after her extended absence, but they had to go with this extremely out of touch plot that was in very bad taste. i'm pretty sure the noah thing is one of the aspects of the season that i will not change my mind about, even after a full rewatch.

it was nice to hear from you again!

#neethu answers #anon

[secondguessing-reality]

Manifested Wrong

Written privately some time in December 2022:

What really happened, as of summer 2023:

You’re here. You’re finally here on my side of the country, in my city where you always said you’d be. I’m here with you, not living together yet but I made it, and you did too. We’re dating, we’re together. We speak daily, see each other a few days a week unless we’re busy - which happens to be often but at least we get a few days.

This is cute. You moved in immediately, and not only do we spend time together every single day, we sleep together a few nights a week. We speak all the damn time! <3

Sometimes you come over just to watch me with housework while I sip wine and have music playing in the background. These nights we spend together end in us tangled up together. Sharing details about our day as you help me put away dishes and place a kiss on my neck.

Oh, my beloved. Things turned out so much better than I imagined. I come home from work and everything I have piled on my to-do list is done already, thanks to you. When we spend the evenings together there's nothing to be done EXCEPT become wrapped up in each other. When we're home, we get so absorbed in our love that we don't even have time to get through videos and craft projects like we said we would. We're just too into each other that anything else seems almost like a distraction from our endless conversations.

On the weekends we hang out with our friends, with my sister and her family, my fiancé, or just with each other. We go places, do activities, find new places to try, all the fun things we said we’d do together. We have dinner at the fancy restaurants I like, and we find new cafes constantly. I take you to Rise or Asa's and you brag that nothing is better than NY bagels. It makes both of us laugh.

We definitely spend more time with each other than with anyone else. I'm happy to report that everything else is true, except I haven't taken you to a bagel shop here, yet. Soon!

I show you all my favorite spots in the suburbs that I call my home, a place that always felt solid and familiar. Sometimes we go out to Milwaukee to visit my family, spend time with my aunts, uncles, and cousins. I’m not afraid of introducing you, especially to my mother's side. Seeing us in the dynamic doesn’t worry me as I thought it once would.

I've shown you many places that hold meaning to me. I feel lucky I've gotten to see similar places to you. The family that has met you has loved you.

Sometimes we go out East to visit your family, your friends. Sometimes it’s for cons, sometimes it's just back to the Island for little weekends, occasionally it's for the City. We watch sunsets, we walk by the beach, I make an excuse to touch seawater every single time I get near it, you tell me about historically significant buildings and landmarks we pass, we share street food, I point out wildlife. You take my hand as we walk through the villages telling me this is the best love you’ve ever had. 

We've been back twice so far. This prediction was surprisingly accurate! Look at it! Everything came true. Well, take me back to the city for another day of adventures.

We share our traditions, or culture, stories from our upbringing and what its like to be raised by parents raised by immigrants. Things I thought most people wouldn’t understand but you do. The good, the bad, the ugly, the dirty, and the beautiful parts.

In the nights we stay up talking, joking, having sex, watching Netflix, laying next to each other in blissful comfort. We trust each other. I never thought it was possible to trust someone this much, I thought it was a myth, that it was something I only read or see on TV but you make it real. The closeness, the vulnerability. I overcame aversions because I want to be with you more than I’m afraid of being vulnerable. We learned from each other. The lessons we knew we needed to learn. You helped me to rely on others, to be open with others, to ask for help and let people help me. With my fierce love and adoration, I hope I'm helping you learn how to see the greatness within yourself. We’ve grown with each other, becoming better, stronger for each other all with the intention to continue to grow with and for each other.

Wow, okay. All true. Plus a plethora of pets. We've been through so much else the last few months, but when you look at it from December's perspective, I had no idea the depth of our bond could take us this far, and almost too easily.

I open up to you in ways I haven’t opened up to people before. And the best part, you don’t look at me like I’m crazy, or that I’m from another planet. Even if you thought as such you never make me feel alien for it. I don’t need validation, and you know that, but you let me find comfort in you without the fear of feeling like I made a mistake.

I let you be the weak one when you need to be. You want to be strong for me because I AM strong for you and for myself, but you know when to put away the façade and take a break. We lay down on the couch, your head on my chest as I play with your hair. Your long, silver, cloud-soft hair that I love so much. You talk as if no one is listening, opening up about things you keep buried deep. I respect your boundaries and you respect mine but we ask each other questions and tell each other our concerns without having any worry.

And when we look at each other and into each others eyes, we know it, better than we’ve ever known. We’re in love, and we always will be.

This is what I imagined for us. Prayed for. Beseeched the old Gods to grant for us. And it's true, except...

It's so, so much better than I dreamed.

[reviviscencegruiform]

This just happened to me so I thought I'd ask you,

If you were dating a girl and she was having some self-esteem issues and she asked you if she could book an appointment with a professional photographer to get some boudoir shots done... Would you let her or would you say no and accuse her of wanting to send the pictures to someone besides you?

First off, hi, hello, howdy. It's funny to me you'd assume I'm capable of forming a committed romantic relationship being who and what I am, but it's also very flattering so thank you very much. That's a nice little ego boost.

To that point,

I really did have to sit and think about this one. Getting over the hump of disbelief that a seemingly normalish woman would consider letting me court her to this point was the tallest hill to climb here, but I managed it and even though it took me all day, I have your answer.

Let's start with being very honest. I would automatically be very defensive because don't I make you feel pretty? Don't I tell you 24/7 that that I am absolutely flabbergasted as to why you are with me constantly? Where have I failed? Where have I fallen short? Why don't you believe me? Why are you with me if you think I'm just fucking with you about this? Do I, of all people, come across as the kind of man who would just pander to you about the sheer unrelenting horror that is my attraction to you and the vulnerability it makes me feel?

And then I realize that it isn't about me.

I don't make you feel unattractive. You make you feel unattractive and I can recognize it because I do the samething to myself and it would break my heart to the very foundation of my being that you knew what that felt like.

Life makes you feel unattractive because you don't look like what's in the billboards or on the magazines. I'm a victim of that too. You don't look like what's on TV so you don't feel attractive because nobody can stand up to the propaganda we are subjected to every day and it has not that I have failed you it is that we as people, as just empathetic human beings, have failed one another and put corporations and greed over our own wellbeing for so long we see it as a personal failure rather than a societal ill when our loved ones find fault in the faultless parts of themselves. And we have failed to raise our children to be better than that. Instead we've raised them cruel and judgemental to those that don't fit the mold even when they themselves don't fit it.

And then I would feel very guilty.

I would have gotten angry and I would have gotten defensive and I might have even said something to you that was completely uncalled for it so I apologize for that here, imaginary girlfriend. I'm still learning and unlearning.

So I would absolutely say you should go get your photoshoot, but be very careful about what you pick out to wear. I wouldn't be saying that as a possessive thing, I would be saying that because whatever you put on, I'm going to put on.

We're going to double book.

So you are getting your photos done and so am I. We're gonna have an entire roll of film to each of us and some as a couple. So many pictures this photographer is going to make bank on our dumb little asses and once you have picked out the pictures that make you feel the most beautiful, we are going to take those same pictures of me, in the same pose and the same outfit, and we're gonna post them online for everybody to see.

You will be so fucking hot in comparison to me that you will become a sensation online. Your ex's will mourn the loss of you. Your bullies will feel pants shitting regret because now they can't have you for themselves.

You will look like the goddess you deserve to look like and feel like the goddess you deserve to feel like and I will look like a cockroach in a bubblegum wrapper, but I would have made you laugh and I will have never have been happier because you are happy and smiling and that is all I have wanted since we met.

We will hang that picture above our bed and we will remember that we are beautiful every night and every morning.

And also probably that I can't pull off spandex, but that's ok.

[peacespun]

obligatory, hello i love you ask, because I need to just sit here and talk about how amazing you are. starting from the beginning, can you believe it's almost been 12 years since we've known each other and how much we've grown together. I remember when we first started talking, you wrote me a starter that i NEVER replied to and then I messaged you like, hey so........ plotting instead please. and I picked abraham for dean and its been a very happy roller-coaster of plots, and characters and blogs and we've just been inseparable since. you've stuck by me for so long, through all my ups and downs, all my rants, all my mental health crisis, not once have you treated me differently because of it, you've always treated me with the utmost respect and have been nothing but my rock for so long. I can't imagine my time on here without you, I can't imagine my time offline without you even though we're still slowly getting to moving in together part but we'll get there. literally happy almost three year anniversary 💚💙💜

taps the mic like -- ahem..... warning: being sappy on the main !!

my darling!!! these messages honestly always make me start to get emotional on main because gOD-- i'm ridiculously in love with you, you have no idea. you have easily become the light in my life, and sometimes its so wild to think about how i've had you, my light, for almost 3 years. crazier to know that we've known each other for basically 12 years. thats INSANE!!

time is going by so fast and yet, still not quite fast enough to get to the moments we want to get to. they always say "patience is a virtue" and "good things come to those who are willing to wait for them," but god if i'm not attempting to will the clock to spin just a liiiitle bit faster so that 1) i can see you again, and 2) that we can finally be together and move in and have our own place !!!

you have no idea the impact you've had on my life just within these twelve years alone. you have completely changed my life for the better. knowing you has made me a better person, through and through. knowing you has allowed me to understand so much about myself, believe it or not, and about us, and then how to support you in nearly every avenue you need. mentally, emotionally, through rants: good, bad, and purely out of excitement (those are the most adorable btw for peoples that don't know it yet, just you wait).

you've taught me so much without ever realizing it. and it might be HELLA cheesy of me to say this but i haven't been as awake as i feel that i am now with you in my life. i see in color now. there's so much i understand and makes sense with you. i notice and learn new things with you every day, and i truly cannot wait to experience that for, god willing, so many more years.

i've said it multiple times before but having you in my life, especially in the way i've gotten to love you these last few years, has totally changed my life and it will never stop. even long down the road, wherever we are, you are going to be the one thing that makes sense.

you are my sunshine, my north star. my cutie lil future man! i am forever grateful to the shy girl that literally got so nervous when she first followed you that she'd actually closed the laptop and threw it to the other end of the bed because the idea of you following me back was bonkers to me then. i'm forever grateful to her and forever grateful to whatever nonsense it was that made you, the bestest bean, to follow me back. those kids had no idea back then.

i love you so so so so much, my darling!!! forever and always. 💜💚💙

tl;dr:

#large image / #warspun #i love you i love you i love you

[ravenwolfie97]

2023 Art Summary

that's right folks, it's the end of the year, and you know what that means here :3

it's been a weird year for me, with lots of difficult and new things going on, but i think that overall it's been an okay time. however, art stuff did not come to me as readily, most of the stuff here this year are either sketches during dead air at work or done in a big batch in one big spurt of inspiration. as per usual, i'll let ya know what all went down. it turned out alright :>

well, without further ado, let's get into it!

Continuing from the tail end of 2022, I got more requests for newer Pokemon to draw, and it was really fun! Having grown up alongside the franchise for so long, I find it really interesting that I can pick up how to draw them pretty quickly and pretty well. These were all first attempts with whatever idea I had in mind, and it was a good time :3

The next month continued the Pokemon drawing trend after I had discovered and played around with the Pokemon Infinite Fusion generator. I loved the dedication so many people had to make their own unique combo designs, so later on I had downloaded the Infinite Fusion fan game and had some fun with that!

Additionally, my partner Stacey was planning a homebrew DND campaign called the Afterworlds where angels and demons live in their own little lands. I ended up deciding on making a Changeling Bard demon of Pride, who I named Masque. I have their initial sketches here because it was sort of a pivotal moment in my character creation process. I had a vague sense of a design in mind, which I sketched on the left, but I wasn't happy with it - it was just too boring and plain. So, I took to the internet, and I looked up various references and inspirations and ideas and came up with the sketch on the right, which was much more interesting! Definitely more fitting of a dangerous entertainer type.

Once again, the months bleed together, and Masque's design was completed! I really fell in love with them and their design, and even though we only managed to do one session with them so far (mostly due to life stuff btwn all of us) I really can't to do more things with them. More things like debuting their stage persona, Escher a.k.a Ghost! As the leader of a ragtag group of traveling performers known as the Cabaret Depayser, Escher is a much more charismatic and charming facet of Masque that keeps them hidden from those who want to hunt them down. Since I haven't got to play with that side of them just yet, we'll see how that turns out :3

In other news, Pizza Tower was all the rage this month, and I couldn't help but be swept up in it too! It's an incredibly mesmerizing and fun-looking game, with excellent animation and music and everything. I eventually picked it up myself, but haven't gotten to play it yet. I did end up really liking drawing them, kind of forcing me to embrace a more cartoonish side of my art style, and it was really fun to do.

Also uh. I got sick. like... really sick. i never get sick. so i made an art to cope. this would not be the last time i got sick like that. was still funny to draw it out though

A rather uneventful month, but hey look! We've returned to Pokemon. This time I asked to draw some from memory, and overall I did okay, even for the newer ones like Toxel here. I got the general angery baby lizard vibes down.

I also drew my friend Cake's egg magical girl OC Sunny Side and her little buddy Tama in my downtime at work. I think she's neat and I thought she would be fun to doodle :>

i truly had nothing else this month other than this one wip, gomen

I actually have a very valid excuse for this, because I was preoccupied most of the month with helping out my partner on her student film, which much like this wip was about our story Cosmic Legacy. I helped out with voice acting, voice mixing, and the music; although we weren't able to complete all of it and we still haven't picked it back up to finish it, I was still proud of what I was able to accomplish in about a month on top of a full-time job.

fun fact about this wip while i'm here though: it's based on this one shot from BTS's music video for Run, one of my favorite songs of theirs as well as one of my favorite music videos

i've always wanted to draw some group with this shot as reference, and it worked perfectly with these kids, but i still have to. y'know. finish it

Most of the month was, again, sketches from work free time. I felt like doodling some of the Destiny Guardians from my own story The Dark Side: War on Destiny from memory, since I don't draw them very often but I still like them a lot.

Circling back to Pizza Tower brainrot, my friend Atlas and I started tossing around an idea of what if, instead of pizza and Italian inspiration, it was ramen and Japanese inspiration? I was really struck with inspiration by that thought, and came up with five new ramen-inspired Toppins: char siu pork, narutomaki, scallion, boiled egg, and wakame seaweed. I thought they all turned out really cute :>

And, as my one piece of actual polished art in literal Months... Genshin dropped a teaser for the new Fontaine region and showed little glimpses of this Melusine, and I was so enamoured I had to draw her. They are so cute and I like em.

sometime in between months, i got sick. again. just like back in march. but that proved to be a little bit useful because...

SURPRISE, IT'S FULL COLOR ART

it was Artfight time once again, and I did not want to miss out. However! I kind of monkey wrenched myself by doing the color wheel challenge that had taken the internet by storm during the time I was under the weather. I ended up finishing it by the middle of July, so I only had time for a couple of art pieces for Artfight after that, which is kind of what I did to myself last year too. At least I had a valid excuse with doing another big fun art thing lol

I still have so many color wheel theme ideas that I would like to make, but after this, life would really get in the way of things, especially art-making in general, so I definitely plan to revisit those ideas later

it was around this time of year when not only was it forest fire season, and i had an ear infection right after being sick, but it was also time when i started really considering and making plans to move out across the country. it was a really busy and stressful time, even outside of myself since my parents and their aging parents were becoming a situation i had to watch unfold and help support as best i could. i doodled a little bit during work but most of my time and attention was spent elsewhere. drawing Lyney from genshin from memory was pretty fun, though. i liked him far too much even then lol

September was when things ramped up even more, and on the 22nd I, with my mom's help, had left with my belongings and began the 3-day trek from Seattle, Washington to Albuquerque, New Mexico. It was actually a decent time with lots of beautiful scenery, which I'll provide here since I... got absolutely nothing done in this month.

also... coolest hotel ever. absolutely oozing with charm. loved it

and actually, i lied a little bit. once i had actually moved in and settled, as i was getting stuff to furnish the place i wanted to pick up something for a little art project to like. keep me sane. so i had found this little Dia de Muertos ceramic cat statue painting kit and fell in love with it and after many days and layers of paint i basically finished it at the end of the month and I think it turned out really cool!

and so, since September was a bit of a dud, here's an October double feature :D

Over time, I started getting into a groove and much more comfortable in my new home, so my art started to pick back up. A lot of things were on my mind: I wanted to start planning on a potential rebranding/vtuber career and made some iterations on a design for my sona's model before settling on the one here, I was extremely bored one day and decided to pick back up on a papercraft doll for my friend Cake's sona (coincidentally just in time for her birthday), I started getting back into TOME and did a redraw of Demon Alpha over a screenshot from The Owl House to revitalize my love of drawing from that franchise, I wanted to draw Masque again cuz the homebrew game had been dead on our group's end because of scheduling conflicts and stuff, and lastly I wanted to do another halloween vampire-sona piece and got the idea for a fun, spooky, sexy two-parter with some bloods. It was a good time and I was feeling on the up and up :3

This month was less up, not just because I did a lot less, but because... I got covid. Finally. After nearly four years of evading it, I think the new environment and stress got to me and got me infected just in time for my birthday :^)

I could barely get anything done during the time I was sick, but I did do a few cool things. Again, I had gotten back into TOME after watching through the A2Z movies, and the epilogue really got me, especially with the softlocke content. So I did some doodles in my spare time and only managed to get this one digitized (which i didn't post yet cuz i wanted to do the others too first, whoops)

The girl on the left is a product of a nifty design challenge I found while mindlessly scrolling thru youtube shorts, where you create an OC based on some traits of yours (here's the video i found for it). It was just a fun little prompt that got me to do a little bit more this month.

Then I wanted to practice drawing my new vtuber sona some more, and there had been this trend on Twitter where people drew characters in one of the poses from this K-pop music video GUILTY. It seemed like a cool pose idea, but I feel like a lot of the people who did it mostly liked drawing muscly dudes and rendering them or just drawing the pose to be sexy, but I was most interested in the context of the song which made it much darker and spookier while still being very sexy and fun to draw, so I focused on the spookier angle of it

and finally, December was a very busy month with the holidays as I was prepping gift-giving for work and my family, but I still ended up dedicating my time to a couple of projects in the time I could find in between

my main focus this month had been on an idea inspired by this series of videos by ABD Illustrates and based on some kinds of image combination techniques to make a bunch of genshin OCs based on a collage of every character of each body type. I had made five different ideas, each with a different element, weapon, and national origin, as well as movesets and even voicelines! But I hadn't gotten terribly far in rendering them, but I wanted to have at least a preview of one of them for this, so I started with my favorite of them all, Jack! He's the one I've become most interested in developing, and I like how he's shaping up so far :3

And, of course, as always, Pokemon runs through my veins and keeps me going. I did some doodles at work, inspired by Hoenn nostalgia after finding Alpharad's Too Many Types romhack to download for myself, as well as my latest playthrough of PMD Rescue Teams Red and Blue, including DX, which I'll be liveblogging here in the future.

Well, what a year it's been. I've done a lot more than I thought, despite everything, but I'm excited for the year to come, because I am dedicating it to all the WIPs I have gathered over the ages, and I will hope to see many of them done for the next summary! Until next time!

#my art stuff #art summary #hell yeah #what's interesting is that - looking back - this one is way more dense than previous summaries #however for most of those summaries i only picked the highlights. for this it was almost everything dkdhf #i think i felt like i had to do that in order to feel like i accomplished Something #there are definitely still bare spots but like. idk. this year i did not feel confident in my output #but i hope next year will be more fruitful

[c0wparsnip]

Parasocial

I have an investment in your concept,

Where we've gotten to know each other over the course of half the year,

And we started off just hooking up

But got more and more involved,

Slowly burning into the endless, blissful love I know we both must want.

The others may not see it,

But I promise you we're really together,

And I love you more than anything else,

And I know you must love me too.

I think of you and I close my eyes,

And you wrap me up in your arms

And kiss me like you mean it,

Like you really, really want it,

Like you always have really, really wanted it.

We curl up together,

And you tell me about your day. your insecurities, your biggest secrets and your most mundane details of life

Until this inevitably gets me to fall asleep.

When I wake up you're there to greet me,

Smiling, happy, telling me I look so good,

That you can't wait to spend another day with me and tell me all about it when you get home.

Throughout the day you're there for me,

Whenever I need you, want you, miss you,

Whenever I'm alone I call you up

And you're there immediately, without question or hesitation

And we sit and chat and kiss and fuck and do whatever else we need to do to get me through the day.

Was I ever good at this?

No.

But you don't get a say.

You're stuck with me until I can let you go.

Unfortunately,

I treat you like air;

I need you to survive,

So much so that I stop thinking about when you're here and when you're not,

But if I had to guess, I'd say you're here most of the time.

If anyone but you ever asked,

I could confidently say I love you,

That you love me,

And that we're perfect together.

When I'm alone in my room, when I'm alone in the dining hall, when I'm alone in the library or alone in class,

I have your voice in my head

Telling me I'm perfect, I'm loved, and I'm doing a good job

That I don't need to be so anxious all the time

Because you have my back,

You're always behind me.

I stay up late just looking at you,

But you'll never know how deeply it goes

Because you'll never know how much time I spend here,

Online, just looking at the pictures I've seen so many times before.

When you post a new one,

I become addicted,

Fascinated,

On every little detail

To give me content for my fantasies to come.

Your pictures don't speak.

They don't move,

And they don't hold me like I want them to,

But they're all that I have,

And I need to build a man.

You're all that I want,

At least that's what I think,

When these pictures of you treat me so well

And this man that I've made up loves me so much.

When I see you out in the world, I cower in fear.

I'm forced to face the realization

That you're never really here,

And that I've invented a version of you

Who works so well for me,

Who holds me every time I need it

And says exactly what I want to hear

When I can't face the fact that I live lonely most of the time.

When you're really there, it's like I'm meeting Jesus Christ.

You're supposed to be a myth,

Someone I can never reach or talk to,

But I can feel all the time in my heart

And who comes to my aid when I need it.

Talking to you is like talking to God;

You're never really doing it, but it always makes you feel better.

Do you ever really hold me?

Sure, like God does for everyone in the palm of His hand.

Do you ever really kiss me?

Sure, like the Blessed Mother does in someone else's prophetic dream.

Do you ever really love me?

Sure, like Jesus loves each and every one of us,

With his whold heart,

All the time,

As he watches over us from up above.

It's all a big story, but it becomes real when you believe it enough.

If Jesus can love me without having met me once,

Surely then so can you,

But when you become real, I lose my religion.

It hurts to be wrong inside your head.

Everything I say and do is borderline concerning.

Here, the most mundane and mediocre

Become celebrated and pined for beyond that of deities,

And the most fantastical and extraordinary

Become part of everyday life.

But you don't care;

You just love me,

Because you're not real and I don't give you a choice.

So tonight, when I lay down alone to go to sleep,

I'll hold onto my little pictures of you,

And I'll make up my little daydreams

Until they fade into night dreams that cease to make sense.

I'll hold you all the way,

And you'll almost hold me back.

But you truly sleep on the other side of campus,

Again, alone, but never with me.

You're fantastic

In the most delusional sense of the world,

But I'll never have the courage to let you go.

You are mortal, flesh and blood and real somewhere in the world,

But right now, you are my God, and there was no Jesus.

#borderline personality disorder #bpd #actually borderline #i am delusional #no amount of dbt can fix this #Spotify

[jiltedbymyjester]

Dear Bunny,

I hope you're comfortable and doing as well as you can be! Honestly it's been a long, dark, hard week without you, but it's been enlightening and cognizant as well. I wanted to let you know I'm safe and that I'm still doing my best I can do!

I know we've both been struggling in different ways for a long time and I always wish I could have done more for you. You said this wasn't healthy for either of us and I respect you saying it isn't healthy for you. I only want what's best for you and trust that you know what's best for you. I just want you to know that it's unfair to say that it was healthiest for me tho bc it's untrue. But I just want what's best for you in the end anyways!

I honestly don't know what really happened, how you feel rn, or if it's really over. This has been so sudden and huge, but I want you to know that I don't hold you leaving or the way you left against you, Bunny.

I believe that we're better together, but I know you'll be okay no matter what or who is in your life. You're resilient, clever, resourceful, silly, witty, so so so funny, and perfectly Bunnycore. You're the best even if you can't see it yourself!

You used to say you hated the phrase "it'll get better over time," or things to that affect, but I also think things have gotten so much better for you in countless ways over time in the end!

I'm so proud of you for who you are and for all the things you've done for yourself and others. Over our three beautiful years together you've became my best friend, my favorite person, and the only partner I ever felt like I could truly be myself with. We both spent over 10% of our individual lives together and you'll always be a part of me. There's no one like you and I'm blessed to have been graced by your presence. What we shared was priceless, irreplaceable, and will always be held near and dear to my heart!

How you make me feel is truly ineffable ...even if that didn't stop me from spamming about it anyways fgjkhfdfvh

Thank you for supporting me in getting both jobs I ended up getting!

Thank you for playing club penguin with me and the times you played games with me! esp that time on words with friends bc it was still so funny to me to this day dhkhgj

Thank you for the movies we watched together, the thoughtful songs, the silly youtube videos we shared too!

Thank you for giving your opinions, telling me stories, and for teaching me so much about your cultures!

Thank you for sharing about your favorite troll webcomics, furry shows, cat books, and theatre songs with me!

Thank you for trusting me and letting me trust you!

Thank you for the silly conversations we shared about everything and nothing, and especially the shared enthusiasm about it all!

And thank you for the profound connection you made with me over time!

Truthfully, part of me never wanted to address that you didn't say you broke up with me or that you said you love me in your final message. In that I could exist in a way where I technically wasn't without you lmao, even tho I know that's not how it works sksksk

I miss you so much and I don't want this to be over. I don't want anyone or anything else ever. I don't need us to be any certain way I just want you in my life. Even if nothing else i wish we could still be friends so i didn't have to lose you completely.

But I understand this is hard for you too and I don't regret what we had at all!

If this is the last message sent between us please know that I'm so happy and grateful I got to spend so much of my life with you! So many tiny and big parts of me have grown and changed in so many ways I never thought possible bc we are more than the sum of our parts together! I'll treasure the love you showed me, the world we created together, and once again want to say truly thank you for every moment!!!

Ultimately I don't need an answer right now, or any time soon, but I need to ask:

Is it possible for us to be together again one day?

I still believe in us!!

There's no time limit for this question and if you don't have an answer I can wait for you as long as we need. Just know I'll be here for you no matter what. I'll never give up on us until you tell me it's over. I just couldn't live with myself if i didn't try for you and us with everything i had one final time!

No matter what I know I'll always be completely in love with you, Bunny, and I'll always want you in my life. I'm here for you if you ever need or want anything, whichever answer you give, okay?

Yours forever,

Brandon 💝

#dear bunny #personal #about me #unsent #unsent project

[chill-pills-yandere-haven]

Dreams of Coffee and K-pop pt.2

Pt.1

An: I found the emoji!

Tw: yandere, implied murderous intent

Disclaimer: Yanderes are abusive, this is not love.

Art cred: Kackaorz1 on Twitter

It was the day of the concert. You had been listening to the 4NEMO music that your friend had been recommending you and had gotten quite familiar with it. Now, you were dressed in your favourite outfit, ready to attend the concert with your best friend. It was two hours before the concert started, but Venti advised you to come early so you and your friend could hang out with them and watch them warm-up. 4NEMO had gotten closer to you in the time before the concert. The boys texted you constantly and you got attached, welcoming them into your tight little circle of trust. You even all had a group chat with just you and the boys. They proved to be a pleasant way for you to blow off steam from your classes and relax so you welcomed them. Just a week after you all had met, 4NEMO had a new hit album called "Coffee Dream". It had become your new favourite album from them, containing all of the things you loved in music. Almost as though it was made with you in mind. You even set your ringtone to the instrumental of one of the album's songs. A beep resounded from your phone as you looked yourself over in the mirror. A text from Venti, " Hey cutie, just wondering if you need a ride to the concert, I'd be happy to give you a ride!" The nickname 'Cutie' had been something that sort of just happened, no inside joke, just Venti teasing you. You smile and chuckle a bit then answer him. "Yeah sure, I'm already ready so you can come now and I'm sure that they're ready too so you can pick us up now." Five minutes later you received another text telling you that Venti was now at your apartment. Making sure to fix your hair, you went outside. Outside was a black limousine waiting for you. "Get in, cutie! The others are starting warmups!" Venti called to you as you got in the limo, admiring the interior of the vehicle. Vent pulled you to his side, thighs touching. You were confused at his actions but then Venti slung his arm around your shoulder and explained. "Well we've got to make sense for your friend, right? Ehe." He giggled at the end. In return, you shrugged but it did make sense so you didn't mind. Plus, this was Venti, he's always like this. Once you got to your friend's house you saw them with a 4NEMO glow stick in hand and wearing a 4NEMO tee with the group's logo on it. "Hey, bestie! And Venti!" You laughed at the stupid nickname and replied. "Ok, you know you are my best friend and I love you platonically, and that I would die for you if necessary, but do not call me bestie. You can call me anything else, hell I'd even prefer if you called me your 'stupid butt-kicking partner in arson,' than whatever that was. Now, let's pretend that never happened and erase that from our memories. 'Kay?" This was just harmless teasing as you two had done much more stupid things and had many more inside jokes that no one except for you two knew about. "Aye aye, captain!" You talked about random subjects as the car ride went on. And Venti held onto you the whole way, almost as if he thought you might disappear. Maybe even a bit more than usual. Once you got to where the concert would take place, Venti escorted you both to the private room where the boys were practicing. "Hey, guys, I brought a little something!" Venti called to the other 4NEMO members, a hand on your shoulder tugging you to him. All the group looked up from what they were doing. From Kazuha trying out different chords on the electronic piano to xiao going over some dance moves that you hadn't seen yet, to Aether doing vocal exercises. Aether and Kazuha meeting you with soft smiles. Xiao looking away from you after he met your eyes. "So that's what you went off to do, and I almost thought you were trying to skip out on practice." Xiao retorted. "Well it is nice to have you here with us, and you too." Aether addressed you and your friend. It was surprisingly relaxing watching them warm-up for the concert. The practice was flawless, clear that everyone had already gotten everything down to the most minuscule detail. "4NEMO, you ready? Shows about to

begin." One of their workers called, you fairly remember her name being Rika or something along those lines. The boys nodded already dressed in their beautiful yet casual costumes. "Wooh! Go 4NEMO!" You called to them as you and your friend headed for where the audience had already situated itself. (On the other side) That past week, they had been almost three times more productive with you as their inspiration. Starting and releasing a new album dedicated to you in just a week. With you on their brains, inspiration was abundant. They were more devoted to you than even some of their superfans, Kazuha even stalking your social media in secret so he could make sure that his next compositions were to your taste. 4NEMO had been trying to express their love for you in the clearest yet unsuspicious way they could. Even referencing the day you met with the album. Nevertheless, you seemed to be only interested in friendship. No matter, everything would go their way in the end. Venti had put in so much effort to have you by his side, even if it was for just before the concert. Having to sneak away from the group without being noticed to go get you, paying the limo driver extra as he was only supposed to have driven 4NEMO there. Even holding back what we wanted to say to make you ditch that lousy friend of yours. Just for you to voice your feelings of devotion for them while he was in the same car!? So oblivious, so innocent, he had to protect you. The other boys were also surprised to see you but welcomed your presence. They all thought you would only show up at the concert, not before. But they all loved to indulge in you, so no one really minded Venti's little stunt. 4NEMO appeared on the stage. Smiling at the crowd with meaningless movie star smiles. At everyone except for you of course. All their eyes scoured the crowd for you, happy to see that you were close to the stage. Close enough, to tempt them into pulling you up to be with them. But, they had an image to uphold. So they held off on the longing looks at you and just focused on impressing you. "Hey, guys! Who's ready for a 4NEMO concert!?" Aether grinned and asked the crowd? The audience wooed back, even you, something the boys genuinely smiled at. "Well then, we've ought to get this party started!" Venti cried as the first song started. The boys knew that this had been your first concert as you preferred more quiet, secluded ways to spend your time while your friend was the one dragging you to interact with the outside world. And they were determined to make it special. Make this day the one that makes you as head over heels in love with them as they are. They started with a fast fan favourite, the one that you had as your ringtone. The one they created as a way to only express a fraction of the passion they felt for you. Xiao moved beautifully and elegantly as he sang. Venti hit a flawless high note that even most female singers couldn't reach. Kazuha harmonized with them in such a beautiful way that it could take one's breath away, rapping clearly and rapidly. Aether was the one who pulled it all together, he was the leader after all. 4NEMO was pleased to find that you were enjoying the change of environment. Moving your head and singing along with some of the songs you knew. Just one small problem. Though it was an irritation, the boys kept up in the perfect way only they could achieve. The problem was that you just had to bring your friend with you, Venti told the others what he had heard in the car, about how you would even die for them. And they just had to separate you two, it was too much jealousy to handle. It drove them even further, made them crave your praise even more. Even just a small compliment would suffice. So they worked their hardest at this concert. Making sure you have the time of your life. The concert was finally over and now you could be reunited with the boys. They swarmed around you once you had arrived at their private room. Asking you how the experience was and was delighted that you said that it was "absolutely

surreal" and that you loved it. It might not have been a direct 'I love you.' But it would work for now. Though they couldn't be with you in public due to their status, they would still have you. They would still make you theirs. They would remove anyone to make that happen. And it seemed like your friend was going to be the first.

#yandere #male yandere #yandere boy #yandere blog #yandere male #Chill pill's yandere haven #yandere genshin x reader #yandere genshin impact #yandere kazuha #yandere aether #yandere venti #yandere xiao #genshin au