#and to experience this world every single day

[starcurtain]

Female Guidance in Aventurine's Life

One thing I haven't seen discussed in much depth yet, but which I think is especially interesting, is the consistency of female guidance in Aventurine's life: Every single person who we have seen on screen offering Aventurine assistance or making a positive difference in his life is female (with one exception, yes, I'll get there).

Under the read more cause it's longggg:

Before even diving into his family, let's just get the obvious out of the way: Aventurine is, at least supposedly, blessed by a goddess. The very origin of his good fortune--be it actual blessing or curse--comes from the literal "mother goddess" who watches over him. This is one of the only instances in Star Rail where a god character is specifically given a gender, and Gaiathra is not ever ambiguous. She is the classic female fertility goddess with all the trappings of other famous triple goddess figures of the real world. Aventurine's personal belief in the goddess may be shaky, but he nevertheless continues to treasure his people's faith. Thus, at the core, we can say Aventurine is a character who is guarded by the most quintessential mother figure possible.

Now, with the most obvious out of the way:

We know that Aventurine's father died before Aventurine was even born, and therefore he would not have any memories of his father, leaving him to be raised by his mother and sister.

Both women clearly made an enormous and lasting impression on Aventurine; they haunt every single one of his memories of Sigonia and are the key elements of the family Aventurine longs to return to. While he flirts with the concept of death as a way to see his family members again, it was also his mother and sister who instilled in him any sense of self-worth and meaning to his existence, the only things keeping him from giving up on living. His mother believed him to be blessed; his sister insisted to his face that not even the only remaining remnant of their mother had any value in comparison to his life.

It is for his sister that Aventurine first begins expressing a self-sacrificial nature, and from his sister that this self-sacrifice is reinforced when she uses herself as a shield to help him escape massacre at the hands of the Katicans.

It is also from his sister that Aventurine learns many of the deeply meaningful actions he holds onto to the present day, despite having been so far removed from his own culture.

Conversely, every one of Aventurine's early negative experiences on screen appear to have been driven (at least primarily) by men.

Although the Katican tribe of course would have both men and women, the tribal societies on Sigonia appear to be on the fairly traditional side, with Aventurine's mother staying at the camp with her child while his father was the one to go out and hunt for offerings for Gaiathra. This is also supported by Aventurine asking Jade to take him to her "chief" later on. Therefore, it is likely (although of course not guaranteed) that a majority of the Katicans' army was male, and that Aventurine's early experiences with outsiders consisted almost entirely of indiscriminate pillaging and massacre at the hands of what the Avgin viewed as savage, invading warriors. In separate instances, Aventurine was traumatized by these warrior figures three times--first with the loss of his father, then his mother, and then finally his sister.

And even their hope, supposed to come in the form of the "men in black" from the IPC, completely abandoned them, leaving Aventurine once again betrayed by masculine figures that were supposed to be there to protect him. Led by Oswaldo Schneider, another cruel male authority figure, the Marketing Department of the IPC permitted the wholesale slaughter of Aventurine's people--something which we know Aventurine is now aware of.

Then, of course, the next piece of Aventurine's backstory we're given is his male slave master. I don't really need to say anything about this, do I? This man violated Aventurine's human dignity and bodily autonomy, and forced Aventurine's hand in a life or death battle for which Aventurine still punishes himself mentally, even years in the future.

In part to escape the difficulty of his situation and rise to a position where he would have enough resources to--he thought--help his people, Aventurine joins up with the IPC. But when he attempts to make contact with a powerful man in the organization, Diamond, he is instead met by a woman, Jade, who against Aventurine's own expectations determines that she will raise Aventurine up (or use him as a tool, depending on how you currently choose to interpret Jade's motivations), granting him wealth and status beyond his imagination.

(And this line in particular is interesting, because you can take it one of two ways: 1) Aventurine comes from a patriarchal planet that traditionally put men into positions of power [thereby making his own slavery an emasculating act, aligning him further with disenfranchised women]; thus, he is making the assumption that to get anywhere in this organization, he will need to work with a man; or 2) He actually was counting on Jade taking his bet and helping him right from the beginning, because Aventurine perceives women as inherently more likely to protect and aid him than men would be.)

In the end, Jade does exactly as she claims she will, launching Aventurine into a position of power while also closing golden handcuffs around his wrists. She positions herself not only as his supervisor, but as his advocate and ally. She entrusts him with her Cornerstone, a sign of significant faith in his abilities. She even seems to be keenly aware of his bias towards the mother figure, referring to him as "child" in their conversations.

Whether this is genuine or a manipulation tactic can certainly be debated (and I'm not inclined to think at this point that Jade is a genuinely good role model or selflessly supportive person in Aventurine's life), but whatever the case, women are the only people Aventurine even remotely considers to be "in his corner."

We see this even earlier, in Aventurine's call to Topaz. Like with the example of his mother and sister, Aventurine trusts in Topaz's ability implicitly, and considers her above anyone else when it comes to completing the mission in Penacony.

Although of course we don't know if Aventurine has any other friends or allies among the Strategic Investment Department, it seems very likely that Topaz, yet another woman, is the one he is closest with. At the very least, she is the only IPC character (so far) that Aventurine has a complimentary voice line for, one that shows his respect for her talent:

Over and over again, the story aligns Aventurine with female figures in positions of authority, and demonstrates that he is comfortable (although maybe not too comfortable, in the case of Jade) with relying on them and trusting their judgment, just as he did with his mother and sister.

And this pretty much goes off the charts in Penacony, where Aventurine has more involvement with the female cast than virtually any other non-female character (even the Trailblazer!). We set the pattern off right away, with Aventurine immediately being placed into a negotiation situation with Himeko, respecting her role as the Express's leader and working to get himself aligned with the Express by acquiescing to her request for support.

Then there's the fact that Aventurine is the one who finds Robin's body, an event which, although he didn't let it show too much, was almost certainly traumatic for him, given the violent death of his own sister.

Next, twice in Penacony's story, we see Aventurine seek out Sparkle for information. He may not personally like her and her comments may be both racist and dehumanizing, but Aventurine does rely on her--being the only character explicitly seeking her aid, which no one else in Penacony seems to want.

In 2.0...

And in 2.1.

Now, say it with me, guys: Aventurine built an entire portion of his grand plan around the idea that if he looked pathetic enough, a female character would absolutely come and help him. And sure enough, the women come through for him, always! Sparkle gives him the exact last clue he needs to confirm his belief that he could use "Death" to reach the true Penacony, sealing the deal for the rest of his plan.

His plan which also hinged significantly on Black Swan's involvement too, another woman that he views as, if not trustworthy, then at least intelligent and hyper-competent.

Contrast all this, of course, with the treatment Aventurine receives at the hands of Sunday, the lone opposing male character he faces in Penacony.

Sparkle implies that Sunday would humiliate Aventurine in an unmistakably sexual and degrading way, and Sunday himself professes this same desire to see Aventurine humiliated.

Then we're "treated" to the moment in which Sunday uses the Harmony's (or perhaps actually the Order's?) power against Aventurine, in a scene which is supposed to reflect an interrogation but is also, very clearly, another nonconsensual violation of Aventurine's bodily autonomy and dignity by a man. While ostensibly seeking confirmation of the Cornerstone ruse, Sunday instead subjects Aventurine to unnecessary questions about his past on Sigonia, which recall and force Aventurine to re-endure memories of his trauma.

Even if this is what Aventurine prepared himself for and planned to have happen, the pain he experiences is very real, and he suffers both the physical and emotional consequences of Sunday's assault all the way up to his "Death" and possibly even beyond.

(Also, Sunday fans please don't get too up in arms with me for this; I also like Sunday! It's okay for characters to be morally grey!)

I think there's one other interesting example I would bring up here too, and that's Aventurine's conscious decision to weaponize his own masculinity against the Trailblazer. Through the 2.0 and 2.1 Trailblaze missions, Aventurine deliberately acts in an off-putting manner to the Astral Express crew, particularly the Trailblazer, in order to build up to the 2.1 climax where the Trailblazer is supposed to view him as an unrepentant villain and attack him without hesitation.

In order to achieve this uncomfortable, villainous effect, what does Aventurine do? Exactly what other men have done to him.

This is especially apparent if you're playing Stelle because of the ingrained societal taboo of a man entering a woman's personal space without consent, but even as Caelus, it is very clear that Aventurine is leveraging behaviors typically used to show dominance: In a complete 180 to all Aventurine's other body language in the game (normally quite withdrawn, frequently in defensive postures with his arms crossed or hand behind his back, almost always standing several feet away from other people), Aventurine violates the Trailblazer's personal bubble, looming over them (Caelus was sitting in this cutscene, lol), forcing eye contact, and commanding the space while informing them that they will have no choice.

For someone who was hunted, enslaved, had his movements restricted with chains, and due to his own slight stature has very likely been towered over by others who were intentionally asserting their power over him all his life, it is clear that Aventurine associates dominant, typically more masculine-coded physically-imposing behaviors with discomfort and even villainy.

Any girl who has ever had a man loom over her like this will realize very quickly: Aventurine wanted to make himself scary so he made himself act more like a bad man.

(Yes of course I know "not all men." I'm not saying every man behaves in this domineering way or that women cannot be domineering too, obviously, just that Aventurine had a very specific image in mind when constructing a "villainous persona," and the physically controlling tactics most typically used by aggressive men toward women was his immediate go-to.)

But where does that leave Dr. Ratio, the one male character actually on Aventurine's side?

Frankly, I don't want to derail my post about how intensely Hoyo chose to hammer on the message of "Women will protect you" in Aventurine's story with a discussion about a mlm ship, but the take-away here is going to lead in that direction anyway--so yes, Dr. Ratio is the exception.

What is interesting is that he does not come across as an exception at first, and in fact initially appears as another male character being rude and dismissive to Aventurine. Like, there are still people out there calling Ratio an unrepentant racist for this one.

Of course, it's later clarified that this is an act--likely even these insults were scripted specifically to give Sunday's spying ears the "insight" he needed to exploit Aventurine during the interrogation.

But even though it is an act, Aventurine still has noticeable trouble putting his faith in Ratio. He does genuinely doubt him a few times, despite knowing that they are working together to fool the Family.

Even his voice line about Ratio confirms that he doesn't think Ratio particularly cares for him; rather, he thinks Ratio simply tolerates him because he's slightly less unintelligent than those around them.

Ultimately, the entire act with Ratio ends up being a mirror of the real scenarios Aventurine has been experiencing with men his whole life (at least as far as we are shown his life). Men abandon him to fend for himself (unwillingly, like his father, or willingly, like Diamond leaving Aventurine to deal with Penacony alone on the inside). Ratio keeps leaving Aventurine completely alone. Men attempt to humiliate him and violate his boundaries (like Sunday and his slave master). Ratio insults Aventurine's appearance and intelligence repeatedly. Men betray him (like Oswaldo Schneider and his men leaving the Avgin to die). Ratio "betrays" him.

I'm not saying when Aventurine devised the plan for their act, he consciously drew up a list of all the ways men had hurt him in the past and had Ratio re-enact them one by one, but like... that's what happened, whether or not Aventurine intended it.

And okay, the shrinking scene in Dewlight Pavilion was just for fun and probably only slightly fetishy, the devs promise; yes, it was supposed to be a joke! ...But it's also not a mistake that this is yet another instance of a male character in a glaringly metaphorical position of power over Aventurine. Aventurine's tiny in this scene! He's completely vulnerable! He's in a dangerous position and the male character could very much hurt him in this moment.

But Ratio doesn't. (In fact, his line here is supposed to be sarcastic, very ha ha--but also, what is Ratio really saying? "I won't do anything to you without your express consent." What a good guy.)

Virtually everything negative that we see in 2.1 is Ratio doing these things as an act at Aventurine's own request. He doesn't actually disdain Aventurine; his own voiceline about Aventurine reinforces that he sees Aventurine as talented and intelligent.

Whatever you think he was apologizing for in their early scene, he's the only person we're ever shown in-game apologizing to Aventurine at all.

He worked hard to "betray" Aventurine but only as he was instructed to do, and immediately checks in on Aventurine's well-being afterward, even urging him to give up the plan if it becomes too much to handle.

And then, of course, there's the note: "Do stay alive. I wish you the best of luck."

After this point, it cannot be denied that Ratio is unequivocally on Aventurine's side, wants to help him, and is not doing so out of any sense of self-gain but largely because he is a good person who simply cares about Aventurine's fate. By the end of 2.1, it can no longer be doubted that Ratio is the exception to the "gender rule" of Aventurine's life, which--the story shows us again and again--was that guidance, protection, and care for Aventurine come from women, while men repeatedly represent dismissal, betrayal, or pain.

Ratio is, at least as far as Aventurine's story shows us, the proof that men can be good, that things are not as black and white in Aventurine's life as they might appear, and that--if you do choose to ship him with or see Aventurine as attracted to men--his attraction could be validated (and potentially reciprocated) by a male figure who would not bring additional harm to Aventurine's life. Aventurine makes the final decision to live after seeing Ratio's note--the exception to the rule ultimately proves to be the last piece needed to keep him alive.

But I promised I wasn't going to derail my own post about w o m e n, so let me get to the final point, and the one I really wanted to talk about: Although Ratio gets virtually all the credit for "saving" Aventurine in the fandom, Aventurine was actually saved by, you guessed it, another woman.

Not going to lie, the reason I started this post was specifically because I wanted to talk about how Acheron and Aventurine's dynamic was completely unexpected but actually fits flawlessly with the theme of feminine guidance in Aventurine's story.

Despite the fact that Aventurine made Acheron's life much harder and actively used her as a chip in his grand gamble, she doesn't blame or chastise him for those actions. Although she expresses some incredulity that Aventurine is actually that lucky, she then turns around and congratulations him for his ingenuity, immediately supporting him despite the fact that they don't even truly know each other.

Then it gets even more interesting. Acheron, who frequently hits her companions with deep and sometimes very emotionally fraught questions, asks Aventurine: "Have you never wavered?"

We as players know for a fact that Aventurine is constantly wavering, constantly doubting himself, his luck, and whether he'll even live--or even wants to live--to see tomorrow. But we also know that Aventurine is not forthcoming about those truths, refusing to express them to anyone, even himself. The only way we hear those dark truths is through his "future" self (who by the way, is once again another male figure cutting Aventurine down--of course it's himself but it's also, from the player's perspective, once again reinforcing the message that he isn't going to find safety or kindness in an adult male presence). Aventurine almost constantly deflects and diverts when his emotions or struggles are brought to the fore (unless he's divulging them for the specific purpose of allowing someone else to weaponize them). "I'm fine," he says, like a lying liar who lies.

But he doesn't lie to Acheron.

He chooses to be completely candid with her, to lance open the deepest wound of his life--that he can win and win and win and still have lost everything. The glitz and the glamour has all been stripped away here, at the end of everything, and Aventurine finally feels safe enough to admit that he fears he has absolutely nothing in his life worth living for.

And then, we get this direct parallel: Aventurine looks to Acheron, the woman now before him, for guidance, for explanation, exactly as he looked to his sister in the past.

He needs help, he needs answers, and he is continually seeking that help from the female figures in his life, whose support and kindness echo the lost care of his mother and sister.

"Go where you should be," Acheron tells Aventurine, guiding him across the river of death just as his sister insisted that he flee through the rain toward life.

Look guys, Acheron's even the one who reminds Aventurine to look at Ratio's note in the first place because apparently being an emanator of Nihility gives you x-ray vision, but my girl just gets no credit at all for being Aventurine's real savior, come on now!! Yes, Ratio's note was the final reminder Aventurine needed that someone would be waiting for him on the other side, but Aventurine would never have even gotten to the point of being willing to read that note if Acheron hadn't stepped in and provided him an answer to his question.

She feeds him back his own answer: "Why does life slumber? To rehearse the death for which we are not currently prepared." It is Acheron who reminds Aventurine that giving into the Nihility is pointless, and that rather than simply embracing a meaningless death, it is up to humanity itself to find and make meaning by living. It's this, not Ratio's note, that Aventurine gives as his reason for choosing to go on when asked by his own younger self. It's Acheron's words that finally give Aventurine an answer--why do we live just to die? Because there are people we can still make proud. Because when we go into death, we should do so with our heads held high, having achieved our own sense of purpose in this life.

Ratio gave Aventurine a promise: Someone is waiting for you to come back.

But Acheron gave Aventurine a reason: If life is inherently meaningless, doesn't that just mean you are free to give it meaning yourself?

She saved him, as women have been saving him all his life.

Anyway, this has already been horrendously long, but really what I wanted to say is that I think it is absolutely fascinating how consistent Aventurine's writing is when it comes to portraying where his support comes from and who he seeks guidance from. (Psst, just in case you still haven't figured it out, it's women!) In virtually every instance we are shown, we see the message reinforced that women are Aventurine's greatest allies and role models, while male figures are continually positioned to intentionally or unintentionally let him down and cause him distress.

"But women playing the supporting role to a male character is nothing new, Star, why are you so excited by this?"

Because the role women are playing in Aventurine's life is not the subservient supporter and emotional crutch role that female characters all too often play to male counterparts. None of the women in Penacony or Aventurine's past were there to do the emotional labor for him, to be a trophy or prize, or to cater to his needs. They don't exist solely to help him fulfill his character motivations; they aren't following him around waiting for his next request as their only role in the plot.

Instead, with Aventurine's story, we almost have an inversion of gender roles, where the male character eschews the stereotypical "men are leaders, fighters, and stoic heroes" archetype. Instead, no matter how hard he tries to hide it and keep a stiff upper lip, it is clear from 2.0-2.1's story that Aventurine is a deeply insecure, lonely, and explicitly traumatized survivor of genocide, slavery, and exploitation. Unlike most male characters, who are very rarely portrayed as genuine victims--because come on, shouldn't men be strong enough to fight back? Shouldn't men be able to shrug it off when they are hurt, emotionally or physically? (Of course I'm rolling my eyes here!)--Aventurine is belittled, humiliated, emasculated, and victimized on-screen, roles almost exclusively reserved for women, for whom surviving victimization in fiction is seen as noble.

Meanwhile, the women in Aventurine's life take on the roles traditionally given to male characters. They're both emotionally and physically his protectors. Aventurine's sister gave her life to guard his safety; Acheron ensured he could safely pass beyond the river of Nihility into the Primordial Dreamscape. They give him the tools necessary to succeed where he could not succeed on his own. His plan could never have gotten off the ground without Topaz and Jade entrusting their Cornerstones to him. The knowledge and capabilities of the women around him--not their "feminine charms"--are what allow them to help keep Aventurine on the right path even though he does waver. Even women who disrespect him, like Sparkle, still play a positive role in his life, able to provide him insight gained with their own intellect and talents.

When he has no one to rely on and doesn't know what to do, Aventurine is able to continually turn to the women around him, asking for and receiving not servitude or fawning, but their genuine wisdom and guidance.

tl;dr: If nobody else has him, Aventurine knows this random woman he met two minutes ago on the street will have him, because the women in his life literally never let him down.

(It's just so, so good, and ultimately, it should be very clear why Aventurine's story is as popular with women as it is! A+, Hoyo!)

#honkai star rail #aventurine #acheron #topaz hsr #honkai star rail meta #character analysis #there's a bit of #ratiorine #in here too #but mostly I ramble about WOMEN #thematic parallels #thematic parallels everywhere #it's long #I'm sorry but not really #sometimes you act like a normal fan #other times you're me #and write essays that wouldn't be out of place in gender studies class #also I hit the '30 images per post' limit and had to make do #please ignore the terrible merging I did of the photos #don't perceive my MS Paint job

[oct0bra1ns]

Can I please request, four platonic yandere brothers with helpless y/n who only grew up relaying on their brothers

My god, i take so long to answer, anyways teehee, im finally answering things yayayayay my trip back home is uh not going to happen i think, very sad, anyways also omg, four brothers also also, im lazy so for now, their names are numbers :p

Reblogs and comments are appreciated

Having four brother to look after you is probably great when you're young but a pain when you're older, combined with the fact their yandere behaviour it's probably hell on earth.

You have to ask them permission for any and everything you do, and unless they say yes, you won't be able to do anything. If involves a friend, one or two will always be hiding in the background in case something happens.

The eldest, One, makes all his brothers report everything to him, where you go, what you do but he himself, never steps in to stop you from doing something, instead, he'll have Two or Three do the dirty work.

One is your beloved brother, who'd never do anything to make you upset, he may be pulling the strings but he'll never out himself as the villian.

One probably has the best job out of all the brothers and he has no problem handing you his card to go buy whatever you want, eat whatever you want. Hell, he takes you to expensive restaurants every now and then.

Even if you ask for a luxury car, he'll get it for you, no questions asked.

What his parents couldn't do, what they couldn't buy you, he'll buy it for you, he'll make sure you never lack in anything, whether it's something you need or something stupid, he'll hand it to you.

Having a good job, also means he's quite busy, but he makes time for you no matter what, one call and he'd drop everything to come to you, after all, his company should be more than equipped to deal with things in the absence of their CEO.

Two is the second eldest, the more strict brother, one who seems he'll scold you for sitting the wrong way, when in reality, he'd never do anything like that.

Despite being the one who finds a way to spoil all the plan One disapproves of, he makes sure to let you down gently, how horrible of an idea it is, how dangerous the outside is, especially when you're so looked after by four brother, the world is not as kind as they are.

Being a professor, Two is out most of the day but when he comes back, he always makes sure you have something to eat or buying something you want to eat. There isn't a single day he doesn't come back with a trinket in his hand.

Two is the brother you go to when you're having trouble with your assignments, he'll take all the time he has to explain it to you, no matter how busy you are, no matter how many assignments he has to complete, he'll always ready to explain things to you If you ever go into the same field as him, he'll pull some strings to get you into the same college he works in.

Two knows better than anyone how much you hate when people raise their voice at you, after all, he was the one who always comforted you after you got yelled at for not being able to understand your school work.

Two does not hesitate to go argue with the teacher if he sees and mishap in your grades, Two has years of experience and multiple connections, he'll make sure that teacher never gets to grade another paper again or if you get a lower grade than expected, he;ll go through the paper with you.

Three is someone who quiet, but the moment he opens his mouth, only sarcastic sentences and insults fall out of his mouth and even you as his sibling are not immune to this, although, he might tone it down so he doesn't get smacked by One again for making you upset.

Three is the brother you'd call after getting in a fight or if people were being creepy towards you, he wouldn't hesitate to break their nose off, and he always reaches the spot suspiciously fast.

Three might not be as rich or smart as the other two but he sure as hell knows how to deal with problems through violence. It's the only way he knows to look after you, you who used to get into ridiculous arguments, who used to stand there and accept every insult, not doing anything afraid to disappoint One or Two. He used to deal with people back then, he used to drag you away when your parents were fighting over something stupid, if he could he would have made sure you never has to see those things but back then, he wasn't as strong nor was he as capable as he is now.

Three is the brother you go to when something goes wrong with your car/bike, he'll fix it up for free, arguing how it got this bad because you took it to some random mechanic outside.

God forbid, Three ever find out a mechanic overcharged you with something, he'll go down there and pick a fight before demanding One to shut down the place.

Four is the youngest and closet to you in age, someone who's always up and about. He'd be dragging you to different places to try out different things.

Always going against One and taking you places, One disapproves off, claiming how you'll be completely safe with him and that nothing could go wrong.

Four knows how much it upsets you when Two or Three stop you from going somewhere when everyone is busy, so he makes it a point to take you there whenever he's free.

Four has always been stuck to your side like glue, back in school when no one wanted to sit with you and now when all your friends happen to be busy all the time.

He'd make it a point to show how awful your friends are, hanging out with others while ignoring you everytime. Unlike the other three, Four doesn't mind if your feelings get hurt a bit, perhaps sitting in a cafe, waiting for your friend for hours will teach you how unreliable they are and how much better your own brothers are, when they drop everything to come attend to your needs.

Of course, he doesn't go too far, four is well aware how one already disapproves of his ways and the last thing he needs from his brother is a lecture.

#octo answers #yandere x darling #tw yandere #yandere x reader #octo writes #yandere #yandere scenarios #yandere imagines #platonic yandere #yandere x gn reader #platonic yandere x reader #yandere platonic #yandere writing #yandere male x reader #yandere x y/n #yandere brothers

[jeonginslut]

what sex is like with them. . . ft. shotaro, anton, & sungchan of riize

<3 cw: nsfw(18+) minors dni, afab!reader, explicit sex, spit, face slapping, fingering, oral, mentions of d/s dynamics, etc.

<3 this was fun to write, i dedicate this to my very best friends who love shosho & sungchan <3. i hope you all enjoy, and requests are open 🩵

SHOTARO

depending on the day. . . it’ll either be very insane sex or very gentle. shotaro is more often than not whiny, begging you to touch him or for him to touch you. however, sometimes, shotaro will take over and put your head through WALLS. starting off gentle, kissing you softly and hand rubbing your hip. then, a switch would flip and next thing you know he has you on all fours, one hand pulling your hair and the other pushing your back into a deeper arch. you would be so overwhelmed with pleasure that you reach back and attempt to push him away. that would make him go feral, pushing your hand away before flipping you over and slapping you across the face

“running from this dick baby?” he’d coo as he tenderly rubbed your cheek, but his dark eyes reading something completely different.

you weren’t even able to answer once he released your face, legs shaking in pleasure as you felt your release getting closer and closer.

your peak was just about to take over, broken moans and a weak “taro” escaping your lips, but your orgasm never came.

tears welled up in your eyes as you opened them, looking at shotaro who was smirking down at you.

“you don’t think you’ll get to cum after running from me like that, did you baby?” he whispered, kissing the tears that streamed down your face, “let’s try this again?”

SUNGCHAN

fucking sungchan was like an out of world experience every single time. he would push you to your limits that you didn’t even know existed, but also left you feeling more than satisfied.

he was so mean, and loved to make you cry. teasing you until you full on sobbed, begging for his dick.

“aw, look at the crybaby,” he would mock pout, grabbing your face between his fingers, letting them slightly dig into your cheeks, “crying cause she wants some dick?”

more tears would fall from your eyes, nodding so hard that it would actually hurt a little, “please sungchan, i’ve been so good.”

he’d tilt his head to the side, laughing at you before taking his hand and pushing your bottom lip down, “if you’re so good, you’ll let me fuck your pretty mouth and then maybe, just maybe, i can consider fucking you till you’re crying— oh, you already are.”

eager to please, you would get on your knees and pull at his joggers, eager to please him, but he’d stop you, “mm, open for me baby.”

you were confused, but opened your mouth anyway, moaning when you felt his spit hit your tongue.

“you’re so nasty,” he would tug at your hair, bringing your face closer to his clothed dick that was very clearly showing through his grey pants, “taking just about anything i would give you.”

ANTON

THE BIGGEST BOTTOM FEEDER. anton is so pathetic when it comes to sex, he would do just about anything you wanted him to do.

he loves going down on you , feeling you tug at his hair and his nose bump into your clit as he eats you like a starved man. you taste so good to him, so he could honestly eat you out for hours if you’d let him.

but you’re too good to him, telling him how to do it, when to add a finger and when to speed up. anton loves when you talk to him, it makes him feel ecstatic knowing that you let him make you fall apart.

when it comes down to actual fucking, oh he’s done for. the way you wrap around his dick would have him over the edge if you didn’t help build his stamina. every time he fucked you, he felt like a virgin all over again.

your cunt just took him so well, and the sound of you moaning his name drove him crazy. he loves when your acrylic nails dig into his forearms, telling him how good he’s fucking uou.

you never told him, but when his chain hits you on the nose when he’s on top, it makes you cum faster than ever.

anton is so attentive to you, making sure you feel amazing before he even considers how he is doing.

“am i doing okay for you?” he would whisper as he fucked into you slowly.

#riize x reader #riize hard hours #riize hard thoughts #riize smut #anton smut #shotaro smut #sungchan smut

[sporesgalaxy]

The way Dungeon Meshi does gender makes me insane. It’s stated over and over that Falin and Laios really are more similar than anyone is looking for- Laios directly states as much at one point, Marcille mentions it when Falin wakes up the first time and starts bemoaning not eating any monsters, the magic mirror story even has fem!Toshiro crushing on Laios- but Laios is so protective of his little sister. Laios leaves home to start making a life he can one day share with her. And she leaves magic school because he has failed, and failed so hard that she’s worried that she might never see him again if she lets him leave without her. He wants to protect her from the way the world treats him, but he does not or does not want to understand the terrible truth- the world will never treat her as harshly as it does him, because she is a pretty ‘quirky’ girl and he is a big autistic man. Falin is happy, doing well in her own sphere, making a single friend (because she is still autistic, and has struggles of her own, even if they’re a different kind), but Laios still feels a need to protect her because his experience of this world has been nothing but cold shoulders and distrust all the way down. This story makes me want to sprint into the river. Laios and Falin are the best characters of all time.

Ouhhhhh I dont have time to reread dungeon meshi to give you good sources but based on my doodoo memory and vibes therein: I have to disagree that Falin was necessarily doing "well," and I especially disagree that the tragedy here is that Laios was doing something unnecessary by trying to make a place in the world for him and Falin.

Falin gets along seemingly ok in the world but it's because she's agreeable to a fault .

What's so interesting to me about the Touden siblings is the different ways they've learned to deal with being The Odd Man Out. Laios set out to try and forcefully carve out a PLACE for him and Falin in the world, where they could both openly and unabashedly be themselves.....Falin stayed behind, and learned how to hide the things that made her stick out too much, and how to appease people on the verge of rejecting her and Laios.

That can be functional, but it isn't good. It isn't happiness. It hurts in a million tiny ways every single day, to hide yourself out of fear of rejection like that.

At school, Falin must have spent a lot of time alone before she befriended Marcille, since Falin was familiar enough with the surrounding wilderness that she knew where that small Dungeon opening was. She sought out what happiness she could by following her unusual passions in more private ways, where no one would judge her for it. Falin didn't expect anyone NOT to judge her for her "weirdness" before she met Marcille, so Falin didn't even try to connect with anyone before Marcille at a level more personal than "classmate." That's not doing well. That's not living.

This kind of self-isolation is a coping mechanism for neurodivergence that functions for a while, but it eats away at you. Falin considered marrying Toshiro despite not loving him, essentially because it seemed like the normal thing to do and she didn't think she'd get another chance to be married at all. What if she had gone through with that, or something similar by the same reasoning? Laios lived in a state of being rejected over and over, which obviously hurts like hell. In contrast, Falin was willing to live a life she never wanted just to avoid total rejection. That can be incredibly painful too, in its own way.

Falin and Laios were BOTH tragically fighting doomed battles to find a place for themselves in the world during the time they were separated. Working together, supporting each other, they're able to do a lot more. Cries.

#asks #dunmeshi #dunmeshi discussion #FUCK AND I FORGOT YOU SAID THIS WAS ABOUT GENDER SO I DIDNT EVEN GET INTO THE FEMINIST LENS FUCK FUCK FUCK. #LAIOS THINKS IS ROUTE TO FREEDOM IS THE MILITARY BECAUSE OF THE GENDERED EXPECTATIONS PUT UPON HIM #FALIN THINKS THAT SHE WILL NEVER BE FREE AND MUST ADAPT TO HER ENVIRONMENT BC WOMEN HAVE LESS RIGHTS IN DUNMESH WORLD #BASICALLY. YES DUNMESH HAS A LOT OF COOL STUFF TO SAY ABOUT GENDER IN SOCIETY AND USES THE TOUDEN SIBLINGS TO SAY IT LOUDLY

[lixxpix]

wish you back - h.js

w.c - 2.0k | genre - highschool!au/slice of life | pairings - jisung x gn reader | authors note - omfg i'm back from hiatus 😭 anyw req by my bby @starseungs i hope u enjoy <3 req can be found here!

life brings about many surprises, one of which comes in the form of han jisung.

life as a highschooler wasn't easy, navigating through workloads, teenage crushes, and the struggles of a growing and developing brain.

most of all, the concept of soulmates.

soulmates were a thing you would expect from a movie, a fictional world. yet, it was very much true, girls gossiping over potential soulmates in the hallways, boys proposing to their girlfriends in soccer games, happy couples strolling down the streets of the city. your life was lived in monochrome, the classic black and white. it was only when you met your supposed soulmate at the age of 18 that everything would explode, a vibrant splatter of colours that finally allowed you to see the world as it was, not just through a filter. people described it as the feeling of warmth on your skin, the thrill of it all, the reds, oranges, yellows, greens, blues, purples, pink, all the hues, like home.

but that blood red string scared you.

what was so good about soulmates? the idea of having the rest of your life laid out before you, pre-destined and fated, scared you. what if your soulmate lived halfway across the world? what if you would never meet your soulmate, destined to die a lonely death while everyone else danced under the stars with their loved one? what if you didn't like the life planned out for you? what if you had to live the rest of your life seeing only black and white, and never see the yellow of the sun or the fresh green of the grass and the vibrant red of the flowers? what if your soulmate didn't want you?

it was especially the latter of the questions that haunted you the most.

you feared, with a frightening worriedness, that your chosen one would reject you. you had heard stories of people being rejected by their chosen soulmate, only to either live out their lives in misery or take their own life. no one was ever the same after meeting their soulmate. 

to be honest, you would rather live forever in a world with only black and white than to go through that heartbreak. you would never allow yourself to fall in love, you vowed. soulmate or not, heartbreak was something you never wanted to experience.

---

"oi!" 

"what do you want for your birthday? y'know what, nevermind, it should be a surprise." jisung grinned, ruffling your hair as you scowled at him.

"don't remind me, you know how much i dread the damned day." you groaned, shoulders sagging in defeat. 

your 18th birthday. 

the day you would finally meet your soulmate. 

life had been so peaceful until now, you thought. until someone would come into the picture and fuck everything up.

just 7 days to go until the day. 7 days wouldn't be that bad, right?

wrong.

day 7. day 6. day 5. day 4. day 3. day 2. 

each day, you could feel the trepidation settling into your bones, a chill running through your spine every time you looked at the clock on the wall, until that very day.

the day was normal, well-wishes from your parents and your gift given to you, the new bag you had been yearning for, significantly improving your mood, a smile on your face as you walked to the bus, corners of your lips lifting up and eyes crinkling. your eyes zeroed in on every person as you boarded the bus, squinting in anticipation of the bright colours that were supposed to burst in your vision. luckily, the world remained black and white, not a single spot of colour. you looked down at your phone. damn. the only classes you had with jisung were in the afternoon.

throughout the day, everyone showered you with birthday wishes, gifting you beautifully wrapped presents, yet you couldn't find it in your heart to be genuinely happy, a fake smile plastered on your face as you thanked them for the wishes. it wasn't that you didn't appreciate the gifts, truly. you just dreaded the change that would come in a few hours or so. in a few hours, you would be meeting the person that you would spend the rest of your life with. 

"class dismissed!" you startled awake with a jolt, unconsciously having daydreamed throughout the class, lost in thought. as you scrambled to move onto the next class, hastily picking up your textbook, a hand stopped you. you flinched in surprise, heightened alertness instantly kicking in. a girl held out your pen to you, the world still remaining in black and white.

thank goodness.

up next was biology, your hated arch nemesis. groaning half-heartedly to yourself as you dragged yourself to your locker to dump your heavy textbooks in, a voice broke you out of your reverie.

"HAPPY BIRTHDAY-" a voice screamed, causing you to yelp in surprise, head whipping around in surprise as you finally saw the offender of your eardrums.

oh.

time seemed to stop.

red, the colour of his old beanie.

brown, the colour of his soft silky hair that you loved to thread your fingers through.

black, the colour of his old sweatpants and backpack.

yellow, the colour of his pins on his backpack.

blue, the colour of his fluffy hoodie.

purple, the colour of his keychain.

white, the colour of the blinding brightness that seemed to overtake you for a millisecond.

han jisung was your fucking soulmate.

in his hands was a badly wrapped present, wrapped in a bright yellow paper, his lips parted in shock and surprise as he started dumbfoundedly at you.

"oh."

he could only sputter, his boba eyes round and wide as the present dropped to the floor in shock.

han jisung was your soulmate. 

fuck.

"uh- so-" jisung's hand came up to scratch the back of his head, eyes wide in disbelief. 

"so uh- we're..."

"soulmates." you could only say in response.

should you be happy? you were supposed to jump in joy, after all. anyone would expect someone to be happy after bagging the person who was simultaneously your best friend and your secret crush. 

but why did it feel like you and jisung were headed on a one way train to doom?

"i- i gotta go." you stammered, turning around and dashing out the hall, breathing laboured as you heard him call after you in desperation.

no, no, no-

life was going so well. he would never want you, ever. he would never see you in that way. your friendship would be ruined. you would lose your best friend. 

life seemed to bustle around you as you ran. greens, pinks, purples, hues of every shade faded into your vision as you ran, tears finally cascading down your face, dripping onto the lush grass beneath your feet. you couldn't bring yourself to look at anything, eyes tightly shut, a stark reminder of what would change.

---

[57 missed calls]

jisungie 

hello?? y/n? i know you probably don't want to see me now... but i'll be here waiting for you, ok?  it's probably hard to accept that we're soulmates... but take your time:) seen at 12.03 a.m

jisungie

you didn't come to class today...  r u ok?? take care of yourself seen at 15.39 p.m

jisungie

its been five days already i miss you seen at 23.12 p.m

---

you threw your phone across the room, head buried in your shoulders as you muffled a sob. 

fuck him and his perfect personality.

if only he were that easy to forget, to let go. 

but he was han jisung. perfect in every way. as if you could ever dream of forgetting him and his warm touch, his wide grin, his fluffy brown hair hanging over in his eyes with a boyish innocence.

"ding!"

you groaned in annoyance, flinging the sheets back, stumbling out of bed, and quickly wiping away your tears. 

probably one of mom's online deliveries again. 

walking down the stairs, you swung open the door. 

"hi, you can leave the delivery there-"

except it wasn't even a delivery man.

it was han jisung.

"jisung-?" 

you could only stammer in response, eyes widening as you took a step back.

after all, what was one supposed to say to your soulmate that you'd been avoiding for days?

a flash of white and pink caught your eyes. your gaze drifted down to his hands, only to be met with a bouquet of pink, white, and red tulips, a beautiful arrangement wrapped in pink tulle and tied together with a elegant white ribbon.

"uhh... surprise?" jisung smiled anxiously before scratching the back of his neck awkwardly as his face turned crimson red.

too stunned to speak, you could only stand there gaping at him. after what felt like an eternity, you finally spoke.

"what are you doing here?"

"wait... lemme just- uh- compose myself. big speech, y'know?" he grinned in nervousness, fidgeting slightly, clearly a bundle of nerves.

"so..." he exhaled. "i know i'm probably the last person you want to see right now, but... i don't blame you. but however you feel about us being... soulmates, it doesn't change the fact that i don't mind being your soulmate. i was... pretty happy at first, but then you ran away, so i-"

"wait, happy? i thought you would be mad, or angry, or anything-" you cut him off, brows furrowing in confusion.

jisung gulped. "i had feelings for you." 

"what-?" your heart rate skyrocketed, a ringing in your ears, the thumping of your heart against your ribcage, all making you painfully hopeful, pleading with the gods to not break your heart and dash your hopes again.

"i- i had feelings for you. so... no matter how you want this whole soulmate thing to turn out, even if you don't feel the same, i'll be happy either way knowing you're my soulmate. if you don't want it to, this won't change anything between us, we can go back to living our normal lives-"

jisung was cut off by the feeling of soft, plush lips on his, crashing into him with a ferocity as your arms were thrown around his neck, teeth clashing with his, warm hands threading into his hair.

you didn't think you would ever get used to kissing jisung, you thought. every single touch, smile, even a tiny glance set your nerves ablaze. the feeling of his pillowy lips on yours was thrilling, his hands threaded into your hair and pulling you closer by your lower back, pressing you flush against him until there was so space between the two of you, bridging the gaps that felt like oceans forcing the two of you apart.

finally, the two of you parted with a gasping 'pop', ears red and cheeks flushed, staring at each other in childlike wonder. 

"thank you for the tulips," you smile, taking them from his hands and planting one last kiss on his cheek, "they're lovely."

jisung's ears turned bright red, stammering out a 'you're welcome' in response as you laughed at his antics. "oh, that reminds me," he smiled giddily, hand reaching into his pocket to pull out a beautiful baby pink coloured box, gently opening it. you gasped, inside was a beautiful necklace with a heart charm in the middle, simple and elegant. "i was gonna give this to you on your birthday, but... well, you ran off, so here." he smiles nervously awaiting your reaction, and is pleasantly surprised when you squeal and plant a big fat kiss on his lips. he helps you put it on, your lips finding his again as you wrap your arms around his neck and tug him closer. "it's beautiful, thank you." you smile, resting your head in the crook of his neck.

"so you'll accept me as your soulmate?" he asked, eyes wide as he worried his bottom lip between his teeth, anxiously waiting for your answer.

you nod, smiling. "i accepted you as my soulmate the moment i found out, i just... thought you wouldn't feel the same way back... so i just avoided you. in hindsight, that sounds pretty stupid," you sigh.

"aish, we could've kissed a long time ago if i had just told you i felt the same!" jisung groaned, pulling you closer as you laughed and smacked his arm in playful indignation. "at least we worked it out." smiling softly, you allowed yourself a moment of peace, tucking your head into the crook of his neck.

"out of all the people in the world, i'm stuck with you, han jisung. but you're the best person to be stuck with."

#stray kids #angst #fluff #skz x reader #stray kids x reader #han jisung #han jisung x reader #han jisung x you #han jisung x y/n #jisung x reader #jisung x you #jisung x y/n #skz angst #skz au #skz imagines #skz scenarios #stray kids fanfic #stray kids imagines #stray kids imagine

[mellon1998]

On the subject of Kipperlilly Copperkettle...

It's okay if you like her, it's okay if you want her to be redeemed. It's okay to wish she had been revived and redeemed and grown as a character. Some of you may relate to her, may know people who were once like her, and it can be daunting to see yourself in a character and see them not get the chance to grow. After all, you got that chance, people you know like her got that chance. We all look back on parts of ourselves we've moved past (maybe even are still working on) and are glad to be past them. We're glad people loved us through those parts of ourselves.

I need you all to understand something though: You chose to change. People like Kipperlilly cannot grow or change until they choose to. Kipperlilly doesn't want to change, she does not recognize the flaws in herself. She may be aware of her anger issues, but she doesn't see her want for power as wrong. She doesn't see her desire for recognition she didn't earn as wrong. She doesn't see the issues of romanticizing trauma and hating people you don't even know and who have done nothing to you. She doesn't see a need to change her ways. Unless and until she does she will not change, no matter what anyone else may do or say.

More than anything, we see this in the fact that she chose Porter. We don't know the series of events that took place, but Brennan made it very clear that she chose him of her own freewill. She chose his side, she chose to force her decision on her party, she chose to kill Lucy and Buddy, she chose to end the world to gain power. She chose to end the world to get revenge on people who, at that point, had never even spoken to her. Up until the final fight, the worst thing they ever did to Kipperlilly was trade quips and call her four dogs.

The truly sad part? She probably never will. I've known many people like Kipperlilly who still, after years and years, refuse to recognize their own flaws. Refuse to seek help. They are given chance after chance, people choosing every single day to love them through their flaws, and they refuse to change.

Kipperlilly is addicted to power, we see this in so many ways. We see this in how she so very clearly tried her utmost to be the leader of the High 5 Heroes seemingly unprompted, as evidenced by 3 (maybe 4) of the other 5 not liking her. People don't tend to be chill about someone forcing their way into the position of leader. Especially in small groups. We see this in how she saw grinding would, at least in the early days, be more efficient for leveling than adventuring. She wanted the power, not the skills and experience. We see this in her bid for class president. She questioned if Kristen actually had any interest in improving the school, if Kristen cared. Did you care about the students or making the school better, Kipperlilly? We saw no evidence of that. The only things she wanted to do was make things better and easier specifically for herself.

It sucks. She is a kid, she isn't pure evil. Even in the world of dnd with devils and demons, nobody is pure evil. She could be more, she could grow as a person. She could use her eye for efficiency but learn to also take the necessity of practical application into account to help her party improve. She could use her abilities to hide and blend in to potentially do really good work to make the world better. She could have been more, but she didn't want to. It's unfortunate, but it's true. She didn't want to change.

Yes, she did go to therapy with Jawbone, but we don't know why. We know it was for anger issues, but we don't know that it was her choice to go. Her parents or the school could have forced her to. Even then, based on the notes, it doesn't sound like she was really interested in using therapy to help her grow as a person. She just used it to vent, which can be a part of therapy but it's not everything.

At the end of the day, she made her choices. None of which were to grow as a person.

#dimension 20 #d20 #fhjy #fhjy spoilers #kipperlilly copperkettle #long post #maybe after some time in hell she'll look back on her life and realize how she needs to change #but even then she may never admit it #sometimes people like that will lie -including to themselves- to avoid admitting they were ever wrong

[ripleylove]

Better Judgement

pairing: Rhea Ripley x fem!reader.

genre: angst (i swear ill make some fluff)

summary: during a hot day of August,you discover you were just another option for Rhea.

A/N: guess what? This is based off better judgement by wendy! (I really get inspired by songs if u didnt notice) ALSO!! I appreciate the support every single one of you gave me onmy first post!! I love you <3 hope u like it!!

⋆ ˚｡⋆𔓘⭒๋࣭

You still remembered all of it very vividly.

The purple sunrise,her icy blue eyes,her pure smile that made her eyes look like crescents,the days where you laughed with her until you cried,and her love for you.

Both of you were inexperienced child-like adults,and you didn't know if your relationship would last. After all,it was,for you and Rhea,your very first serious relationship.

You met during the hot and fun months of summer,precisely in July,and Rhea didn't need to do much to slowly become your first love. She made you discover what true love was,but she also made you experience a huge heartbreak.

Your relationship with her was like an unfinished book,but you had to bid her farewell after what she did.

It was a hot Sunday of August, you and Rhea went,as usual,to the beach to have your familiar fun with the sand and the water.

"Hi,little strawberry!" She waved at you. She used to call you strawberry because your cheeks would always become as red as strawberries when you were with her or when she gave you a kiss (and she loved it).

You ran to her,your favourite book now forgotten on the sand,and gave her a very tight hug. Your left cheek was squished against her shoulders,while your arms circled gently her waist,longing to feel her warmth and her touch.

"Come on,let's sit on that bench." You took her hand in yours,and you pulled her to a nearby bench.

But,as you started to notice her expression, she looked a bit off. "Rhea,are you okay? You look nervous. Did something happen at home?" You asked her with worry evident in your voice,and you watched as she gulped.

"No,nothing happened at home,but I need to tell you something." She said while still looking on edge. You encouraged her to go on with a nod of your head.

"So-" Rhea's speech got interrupted by a high-pitched and girly voice. A girl with beautiful melanin skin,and soft-looking wavy hair came to sit beside Rhea,and kissed your girlfriend's plump cheek.

"Who's this girl?" The new addition to your and Rhea's little date asked,but she didn't even give Rhea time to answer before she continued. "Oh! I'm sorry,I didn't even introduce myself. My name is Ilenia and I'm Rhea's girlfriend." She said with a beautiful smile,with her cute dimples coming out. But wait,she was what?

You looked at Rhea with a confused expression,waiting for an explanation. She was panicking, and she hurriedly took your hand and started to drag you off from that bench. You heard Ilenia calling for Rhea,but she didn't dare to turn around.

She brought you behind a tree far from her girlfriend and started to talk.

"I-I don't know what to say. This isn't how I wanted to tell you,but-" You interrupted her speech,and started yours.

"So what you're telling me is that I'm your side chick? Are you kidding me?" She didn't answer,but she just nodded her head. So you really were her side chick.

"I hate you,fuck the hell off. And,at least, tell your girlfriend how the situation really was between me and you,have respect for her and her time." Your tears were threatening to spill at any moment,but you managed to hold them until you started walking away from Rhea. That was really your breaking point.

You put a hand over your mouth to try to silence your sobs,but there wasn't any way to hold them in. You were devastated,after all the kisses,the affection, the laughs and the moments togheter, for her you were just a side chick?

You started to realise that everything in the world always changes,like the places where you laughed and cuddled with Rhea,or your feelings for her.

You knew it was a bad goodbye,but it was meant to happen.

"Now I don't want you."

#rhea ripley x reader #rhea ripley oneshot #rhea ripley #rhea ripley angst #rhea ripley imagine

[whorety-k]

PLEASE SOMETHING WITH DORN with Sabaton - Stalingrad. I wish for something more militariastic.

Or Sisters of Mercy - Marian with Angron...

This is delicious and as much as I love Angron, I have to go with the Dorn ask for now. I might revisit this ask with Angron later because I am actually goth irl and I love the Sisters of Mercy.

Let's play spot the Sabaton references!

Pairing: Rogal Dorn and Guardsman!Reader (gender neutral)

Song Inspiration: Stalingrad - Sabaton [Youtube] [Spotify] “Oh, it’s colder than hell / … Are you playing? / Do you follow the conductor’s lead? / No one knows you. / No one cares about a single violin.”

Warnings: Great Crusade Era, Near-death experience, mentions of death, medical recovery and injury, open ending

Word Count: 1.5k

The chill of the winter bites to the bone, the ensuing blizzard buffeting against any skin exposed by your uniform. Gale-force winds force you to hunker down behind an icy stone half-wall— the only cover you’ve had for hours.

This mission was supposed to be a simple in-and-out ordeal: putting down the scant resistance groups hiding within the slopes of the snow-laden world you stood on. Intel suggested groups of six-to-ten insurgents taking refuge in caves along the alpine slopes, spaced out far enough and so under armed that the work should have taken the twenty squads of Miltarium tasked to them no more than a day to wipe out.

Well, you suppose, the intel had been grievously wrong.

Your entire unit to be cast back within hours of fighting. No one could have known about the underground tunnel systems the rebels had already established within the ice long before Imperial forces had set foot upon this world, but you and your men had been the first to find out. An entire fortress was concealed within the landscape. 

You try to look for any movement around you. The crossfire only ended yesterday evening, yet already the corpses that had been buried in layers of frost and ice. What good was a sergeant of ten dead? 

Grim reality bites into you: if you fall asleep now, frost-bitten and unprotected, you are not waking up from this. Such is the life of a guardsman. The officer’s final words before the blizzard cut off all vox communication were to hold the hill, and you were not one to defy orders For days, you have held your post as the lone survivor. It would not fall under your solitary watch, even if your body is exhausted. Even if the siren call of sleep reaches deep into your soul. 

…Even if a few moments of shut-eye wouldn’t be so bad.

You hallucinate a crunch in the snow, weary eyes unfocused across the crystalline landscape. This is the end, you think. You must be dying and living through your brain’s final few minutes before shutdown to be seeing the sun’s rays shining through the maelstrom. The golden waves creep closer, blurred masses that reflect like a god. 

But there are no gods. You know this.

Your limbs are almost too heavy to move, almost unable to reach towards the sun as it reaches toward you. It takes every bit of energy left in your body to raise an arm towards the yellow mass, and your muscles given out entirely when you feel it take your hand. The burn of frigid metal bites through your glove as the golden light envelops your body, and you feel your leaden body being lifted before the world finally fades to black.

The lack of light bothers you first. Transitioning from snow-blindness to a warmly-lit room forces you to strain your eyes as they crack open.

Then the burning.

For a solid minute, every nerve in your body flares as if you’ve been flayed, muscles spasming as you arch off of the giant bed you’re placed upon. Pins and needles stab deep into your extremities, molten lava from toe-tip to the crown of your head. It doesn’t even register that you’re screaming until your throat is already raw and sore, a large hand pressing you firmly back down into the cot. 

Your eyes snap open and you grab at the wrist of whoever is touching you, going yourself completely still when the face of a frustrated Astartes finally comes into focus. The deep brown eyes of the Imperial Fist carry a silent challenge for you to do that again. Despite the uncomfortable tingling covering your body, you do not.

The Astartes tunes his vox, turning away and muttering a curt, “Notify Lord Dorn that the Guardsman is awake,” before he returns his attention to you. His gaze cannot be described as caring, but he looks over your form regardless, gloved hands lifting your tired limbs to look closely at the angry red patches blotting your skin. You realize from your limited experience that he’s an Apothecary. 

“Am I–?”

“You are expected to relay the details of the failed mission to Lord Dorn so that the job can be finished, and then you will be placed into Militarum hospice.”

Your mouth clamps shut. That’s... blunt, but enough of an answer for now. The Apothecary turns away and exits the room, leaving you alone in your temporary chamber. 

You had never been around a Primarch before. Rumors about each of the Emperor’s sons had spread throughout the entirety of the Astra Militarum, whispers of who they may or may not be. The insanity of Curze, the wrath of Angron, and the charisma of the Warmaster himself were all well known, but no measly rumor could have prepared you for the overwhelming presence Rogal Dorn carried with him.

The door of the ward opens with a hiss, and your head snaps to the side to regard whoever had entered. You have to look up an extra few feet to meet the piercing gaze cast your way, but when you do, you are filled with an overpowering sense of awe. Gleaming golden armor gives way to ivory skin crowned with a shock of white hair. Deep-set brown eyes with the warmth of quenched steel pin you to the oversized cot. A barely-there twitch of an eyebrow is all his face gives away.

“It is a miracle you survived,” Rogal Dorn’s tempered voice says. From a fellow guardsman, you might have thought it was an expression of gratitude. From the Primarch before you, it was as blunt as the blow of a hammer. 

“My lord–” You attempt to rearrange yourself to bow or kneel to show reverence, but a gold hand stills your motion. You return your eyes to the giant of a man before you, waiting for him to speak.

Dorn approaches the side of your cot, and only then do you see the two Space Marines flanking him. How had you missed them? “You are aboard the Phalanx,” the Primarch begins, “You are the only guardsman recovered that survived transport, so it is vital you relay every bit of information from the mission that you can recall.”

You stare for just a beat too long before you find your voice again. Sloppily, you begin your tale: successfully flushing a nest of rebels before an ambush overtook your squad, forcing you to fall back. Your squad’s attempt to regroup with the rest of the unit, only to find that most of them had already been overwhelmed by insurgents. Seeking shelter in a tunnel of ice and finding the structure within, then being forced back yet again. Taking a hill and holding the position until only you remained. Dorn fills you in that the Imperial Fists had found you there, half-frozen to the stone wall you were sheltered behind.

At the end of your story, the look in those brown eyes seemed to have softened marginally. “Many others would have succumbed to the elements long by the time you had been extracted,” Dorn states, pausing to reflect before finishing with, “You did not.” 

It takes a few moments to register that the Primarch of the Imperial Fists was complimenting you. You bow your head and stutter out, “I-It was important that I fight until my last breath, my lord. The line had to be held.” 

Rogal Dorn nods. You think it might be in approval, but getting a clear read off of the Primarch is about as easy as the mission you just fought through. “I will see to your service being rewarded. Rest, guardsman, and we will revisit this later after the Militarum confirms your promotion.” His words take you by surprise, a warmth blooming in your chest. You don’t know what to say, so you furiously nod your head. The Primarch gives you another look up and down, eyebrow twitching again. You don’t have the mental clarity to question it.

He’s already turning to leave the room when you get yourself together enough to call out, “Thank you, Lord Primarch!” Dorn turns his head back to glance at you a final time, giving you a firm nod of acknowledgement, before his golden frame disappears into the doorway. The two Imperial Fists behind him follow suit, and once more, you’re left alone in the room with too much to think about.

Promotion. You were being promoted for your efforts. You should celebrate, really, but somehow that wasn’t what had taken you the most. What had the Primarch meant when he said ‘revisit’?

Your tired brain could barely keep up with the weird whirlwind of emotions coursing through you, and you stave off a headache as you lay back down on the cot. You were told to rest, and you were not one to defy orders.

#i fucking love Sabaton #rogal dorn #rogal dorn x reader #warhammer 40k #warhammer 40000 #warhammer 30k #primarch #primarch x reader #warhammer fanfic #raven lady writings

[fictional-orphan-smackdown]

ROUND 3, MATCH 4!

All propaganda and what each competitor is from under the cut

Frodo Baggins (Lord of the Rings)

Frodo demonstrates incredible tenacity, intelligence, and heart. His growth and struggle is amazing, and he’s a hero who fails!! But because he inspires such love and loyalty in his friends, his quest succeeds. He’s a tragic hero, a model that so many fantasy books misunderstood and even still were inspired to copy nonetheless. I think the fact that he is an orphan isn’t as important as it is for some characters, but it is important to some extent, emphasizing the loneliness of being a ring bearer, as well as the strength of his relationships with his friends. His parents are also descriptive of his personality, his mother being a descendent of the Tooks, the most adventurous Hobbit lineage, and his father being from the more genteel-in-bearing Baggins’. Frodo is a reluctant hero, only accepting the role, and enough adventure for a lifetime, only once it was clear he was the best option. He was polite and refined, even in absolutely foreign circumstances, and, in a bit of parallelism, not only saves his best friend from drowning, but in the end, sails away in a boat to a new life.

The things this guy endures to save the world are horrifying. There are plenty of other stronger people who think they can do it better than this humble, meek, unassuming halfling but they can't begin to understand. This mission isn't a privilege, it's a burden. He's trying to do the ultimate stealth ops when he's public enemy number one, with the enemy's life force wrapped around his neck like an anchor, corrupting his body and mind with every single step. Think about the most exhausted you've ever been. Then imagine having to walk nearly 2000 miles with that exhaustion, little to no food or water, getting stabbed, poisoned, hunted down, while carrying the full weight of the worst person you can think of as they try to drive you insane every second of every day. And he still makes it, for the sake of his home, his friends, his whole world. Is it any wonder he struggles to find peace after an experience like that? He deserves so much.

Chuck e' Cheese (Restaurant/family entertainment center chain)

Charles Entertainment Cheese grew up in St. Marinara orphanage and he loved singing, especially happy birthday. But he didn't know his own birthday (because he is an orphan) so all he could do was celebrate other kids' birthdays. His favourite part was the pizza. He also loved playing Pong and he went to New York City after winning $50 in a Pong tournament.

#poll #lord of the rings #lotr #frodo baggins #charles entertainment cheese #chuck e cheese #showbiz pizza #this is the best poll in the tournament I think

[spittingstar]

ehsfdj

#i'm so glad i have a look that says #hey! come talk to me #i wanna speak w you #today i was at the craft store and this couple came up to me and talked to me just to chat #i wonder what that means #i think it's cause i usually have an empty dreamy smile bc i'm listening to dreamy girl music most of the time #and basking in the joy of life #recently i have been so happy to be aline #and to experience this world every single day #i never know exactly what the world will have for me in a day #even days when i don't leave my house and i just clean and hang out with myself #they are precious #i love life so much

[decolonize-the-left]

Reminder that I am a trans non-binary person.

Not theyfab, not confused cis, not a trans man. I'm not a man, I don't identify with womanhood, and hate such a limited gender binary.

I'm a trans non-binary person who is also feminine and will continue to be Mostly feminine for Most days even if/when I get bottom surgery.

#🌸 my gf jokes that i just wanna be a trans woman 🌸 #i just want the best of every world is that so much to ask 😭😭 #what if I just want to experience Maximum Gender huh??? what if i just love of them and just want a little of Every single one huh?? #so incredibly disheartening i dont have a penis and thus can not have the phallus preserving vaginoplasty because thats so me #ill just wait for science to get better ig :( #one day ill be able to experience gender euphoria ONE DAY #MARK MY WORDS #genderfluidity a lil bit but not really ykwim?

[orpheuslament]

on the way back from the gym i saw two teenage girls on scooters in the middle of the road & they kept crossing each other & interlocking their feet & they looked like they were having so much fun i hope they have the best summer of their life

#it did make me fucking miserable bc i lost all my teenage years to crippling mental illness + being closeted so i never got to experience #that feeling of freedom. or at least i cant remember & i cant help but feel like something was stolen from me #i wish i could grab 13 year old dante by the shoulders & tell them to please please please make the most out of it #i know it feels like the world is going to end every single day but theres so many beautiful things to experience #& one day you will be 25 & you will miss yr friends & ask yourself why you wasted so much time #i know its not your fault you were just trying to survive & you did do beautiful things!!! but God #dante.txt

[hwaitham]

luckie clover for each of my dear pals . .

#𓈒 ۫ 𝓹𝓾𝓹𝓹𝓲𝓮 𐂯 𝓹𝓻𝓪𝓽𝓽𝓵𝓮𝓼 ₊⠀ೀ #permission 2 be sappy for a rllie quick moment ?? #it is just ! such a gift to know u all ! ! muties n regular non - nons n quiet frens on here alike . . #i miss each of you every single day n im so grateful that we get to spend time together on this spiritual plane < 3 #u all each shine a light in my life in ur own individual precious ways n i am so ! ! starstruck ! #so in awe ! that the universe gave us the privilege of getting to experience each other ! ! 🥺 #u mean the absolute world to me n i kno i say it a lot but i rllie do love u ! ! ! #ur love n friendship n kindness is what keeps me smiling n i hope mine cn do the same for u in return :< #keep radiating U ! ! ! i cant wait for us to meet again in future lifetimes ♡ #Sorrie for this silly post buuuut . . it is js so bright outside n im sitting on the balcony n can see ppl sailing on the lake n like ! #im Alive ! Weee are alive ! ! together ! walking hand in hand under the same sky ! #no matter what the sun will alwys come again to shine down on us :-D

[moonchild-in-blue]

Thank you for the tag @tonguetyd! My spoons are indeed low but my sleep schedule is GONE so. Random burst of energy let's go.

I didn't know what artist to pick because I didn't want an obvious (?) one, so I'm going super niche and choosing Bright Eyes because it's been a minute since I've talked about them, and they're one of my favourites 💙

Artist: Bright Eyes

How do you feel: Nothing Gets Crossed Out

What is your gender: Bowl Of Oranges (obviously funny but also it's a beautiful song! poetic storytelling!)

If you could go anywhere: Lua

Favorite mode of transportation: Driving Fast Through A Big City At Night (yes that is the title)

Your best friend: First Day Of My Life 🥹

Favorite time of day: Sunrise, Sunset

If your life was a tv show: A Line Allows Progress, A Circle Does Not

Relationship status: I Won't Ever Be Happy Again 🥲

Your fear: Waste Of Paint

Idk who made this or not so I'm tagging randomly, no pressure to do this whatsoever! @dearscone @corviisquire @hookedhobbies @politemagic (hi!) @leonsleftbicep @melit0n

#okay i made myself sad again #so little story time! #(okay i talked briefly about past suicide/sh struggles so be warned!) #First Day Of My Life is their most famous song AND is probably my mostest favourite love song in the entire world #like. this particular song means so much to me #there is this line that goes “this is the first day of my life. i'm glad i didn't die before i met you” #and it breaks my heart into a million pieces because that is just. so true. so pure #because for someone who was very suicidal and struggled with sh *just before* i met my best friend(s) #it's a lot. like. that could've been me. and yet i'm here. and i need to hold on more because there's still so many people to meet #and so many things to see and experience. i AM glad i didn't die before i met any of you #it's crazy to think how many things i would've missed if every single time i thought about about ending it i had actually done it #whack #also! nothing gets crossed out is incredibly depressing and poignant! if anyone is in the mood for that! #(most if not all of these are. once again i am incapable of choosing happy songs lmao) #tw suicide mention #tw sh mention #<- is this enough? let me know if i should use other tags!!!! #tag game #darya's mixtape #bright eyes

[thefirstknife]

Seeing some of the latest whining over on Twitter, I think I've realized part of the problem: the content creators who have made playing D2 their life think it's "too easy" and that "toxic casuals are ruining things" because they refuse to admit they're simply too skilled to find a huge challenge anymore. But instead of rebranding to something else and moving on to learn a new game where they'll face challenge and struggle they continue to insist that the game is bad foe catering to "the lowest common denominator". Some of them also seem kind of entitled? Lime the idea that any no-name players (aka people who aren't Big Names in the fandom) could possibly do amazing snd outplay them feels like they're being cheated out of what they're "owed" as their Top Player Bragging Rights? But not everybody who puts in the work to get good at the game engages with the fandom, either. It just feels a lot like some of them think "I put in the work to master it, so nobody else should be allowed to match me and also it needs to keep up with me because I made this game my life". Feels very weird and entitled to me. And I say this as a person who has played some games so much that the highest difficulty settings are a breeze! I just accept that I've mastered it and move on when I want challenge.

Oh yeah, the new elitist dickhead whining is live in the community and it's the same thing as always. Agreed with what you wrote! I think streamers just literally want things to only be "difficult" for them and impossible for everyone else so they can feel special. They can deny it all day long, but there is no logical reason to want FEWER people to play an exciting competition and for FEWER people to feel like they can complete it. Because if people feel like they can't, they won't bother. Why would I waste my time? I'm not getting paid to play the game.

Day 1 raid race is a community contest, meant for the community, aka all players. It's not "special contest for top players only," it's a contest for everyone. It's supposed to be something everyone tries out and does their best, as well as something that is reasonably achievable for more than a grand total of 12 players.

Over the years, Bungie has been hard at work turning raids into an activity that more people will want to play and finish. Including adjusting the way day 1 race is happening and when. They WANT more people to participate which is evident through lowering the amount of grind needed to be ready and moving the race to the weekend, and now extending it to 48 hours. This helps everyone; the community and the devs.

More below:

The moment the day 1 raid race is accessible, that means more people will attempt it and more people will realise that they ARE good enough to raid and complete the contest mode. When the raid race is locked to a power level grind that nobody outside of people playing the video game for a living can achieve, that drastically reduces the number of people who will enter the race. When the raid race is releasing in the middle of the week, nobody outside of streamers will be able to compete. Now, day 1 raid race is no longer limiting in ways that we, the players, can't control.

This means more people can attempt it and at that point, we're dealing with pure numbers. More people attempting means that more people will finish. So when streamers are whining about "numbers," they're whining about the simple hard cold unchangeable logic of math. More people than ever are playing, more people than ever are attempting, more people than ever were able to watch the whole race and figure that they have a chance, and then they had plenty of time to try. This resulted in more completions than ever. Very little to do with the raid being "easy." It wasn't. It was accessible.

There are probably incredibly good players out there who couldn't participate before because they didn't have time or weren't available off work or couldn't ruin their mental and physical health over a 24 hour video game contest. There are probably perfectly average players who can still complete the raid race if they have more time to practice.

And this bothers content creators, because it's telling them that they're not special. Some Joe Shmoe with a 6 year old PC and $5 headset might be incredibly good at Destiny, possibly even better than them, but he didn't have time to compete before. Now he does, because Bungie removed the limit that a player can't control and the content creators are fucking mad as hell because Joe Shmoe, 47, a dad of 3, can finish the contest mode.

They keep insisting this is not the reason they are mad; they're mad because.... uh.... Contest mode is supposed to be SUPER HARD and it's an EXCLUSIVE EVENT that happens TWICE A YEAR!!!! And like. Yeah? Joe Shmoe has the same feeling about it. Joe Shmoe also gets two days a year to participate in a community event. Again, content creators are slowly learning that they're not special and it's a hard hitting truth. Also if more people are playing the raid race, then they're not watching them. That's gotta hurt as well. It's at least 5 fewer subs.

I am so fucking done with their bullshit and their repeated attempts to demean everyone's accomplishments by yelling about the raid being easy and bad and whatever. They are sad people with a void in their hearts.

The raid was absolutely hard. More people than EVER attempted it and MANY haven't been able to complete it. The raid wasn't "easy" in the sense they mean it (they mean easy = bad), it was different. It required different skills and it had a different goal and a different fantasy to invoke in players. Every single one of those bitches used every known cheese and meta tactic to brute force every damage phase and every mechanic, to the point of many of them not figuring out an entire mechanic in the final encounter. They straight up did not understand a mechanic and then dare to say that it was easy. But yeah. They were grasping at every broken build possible and then whining about it being easy. Well I did it with 30 resilience. I am better.

They are absolutely entitled. They feel like they are owed everything in this game because they've been here since 2014 and that if the game is not catering to them, then it's objectively bad. Literally, as you said, they've mastered the game and they're bored of it. But hey, there's money in clickbait about negative stuff so they will keep being miserable playing something they obviously don't like anymore.

I'm so done with those assholes. The raid was an absolute BLAST for me. It was super fun, it was really difficult and it took a long time to get it done, but my team did it, even through a horrible bug that cheated us out of a clear 10 hours early. The raid is SUPER fun, it's an excellent new addition to the raid roster, super helpful for newer players and newer raiders. The mechanics are really smooth and simple, they don't require a lot of callouts, but still rely a LOT on coordination of the whole team. Incredible work threading the line between an incredibly fun raid that is also accessible to everybody. I'll be doing it a lot, it's a really chill experience that still gets your adrenaline going. Bungie did an amazing work with it and I absolutely love it.

I cannot FATHOM a mindset that people have where they want people to NOT be able to experience raids. The most bizarre thing in the world to me. Raids are PEAK content in the game that devs spend a lot of time making and that is currently not being played as much as they want, which is actually a problem resource wise. Since they take so much resources to create, but aren't being used, it's a shame.

This raid was absolutely made with that in mind. They want more people to play to raids. This raid is "easy" in the sense that it is accessible. And there's nothing those assholes hate more than accessibility, I guess. God forbid people who paid for the expansion get to play the expansion. That includes the day 1 contest mode race absolutely. It's for the whole community, not for 50 people with a twitch.tv account.

Every content creator whining about this is a bitch who does not care about the health of the game or the community. They want a game made for them, and only them. They think they own it and that it's good when only 3% of the players play raids. They want every regular player to suffer and leave, to not have fun and to not experience these amazing activities.

They want the game to die.

#destiny 2 #long post #ask #day 1 raid drama #i am so sick and tired of them. all of them. #at the end of the day: I bought the game and I want to play and complete every aspect of it #destiny is not a hardcore gaming experience #literally LEAVE and go play something else #idk what to tell you #at this point i have zero tolerance for their crap #'as a casual player you have strikes! day 1 is for me!' no. every player in the world can practice and get good enough for day 1 #every single one. you guys are just not letting anyone even make an attempt #the very definition of gatekeeping

[echo-s-land]

It's insane how most of the time I don't get how ppl interact and I also Don't Fucking Care

#vent ig #i wish i could #but unfortunately i havent had the occasion of sharing one of my interest with you in the past three months and when i did it didnt go as i #wanted and now we're supposed to talk through smalltalks except i dont know how to do those so im awkward as hell and unconsciously cut the #short and now im being hated (?) even tho that wasnt my intent #but i guess no matter how trustful i am i just look like a liar #and i cant even bring myself to care bc how am i supposed to explain myself when youre convinced what i say is a lie #we werent even supposed to be this close so sorry if im stiff. i tried to get along but i just cant #the never ending circle between 'i want to have ppl to interact with being alone to experience this world is exhausting and dreadful' and #'im not even remotely interested by any of you' #its different on tumblr bc i can curate my own experience & nobody comes @ me when i dont interact with them for days or weeks (BC IVE GOT #NOTHING TO SAY) and its okay and its normal and we dont have to do the 'hi how are you wyd' script every single time (sure we can check up #on each other once in a while but it doesnt become a script. it feels genuine.) #anyway. im so normal. i can def care about ppl that have never been as insane as me about something we both love(d at some point) #am pretty sure i developed 'i perceived you saying/thinking One(1) bad thing about me and now i dont care at all about your existence' as #a child as a coping mechanism but goddammit i feel like an asshole everytime it happened #i hate feeling apathetic #and i hate lying too so i cant just say shit to reassure them when i dont mean them #cant tell them im sorry about how my behavior is perceived when im so damn tired and would rather they disappear of my life