#and the yuji angst??? too many of them

[sugurism]

FLAGS EVERYWHERE. ୨ৎ are jjk men green, beige or red flags?ㅤheadcanons

featuring ♰ㅤmultiple. (choso, higuruma, megumi, nanami, gojo, geto, sukuna, toge, toji, yuji, yuta)

warning(s)! ♰ㅤNO PRONOUNS AND ANATOMY FOR READER. SFW (?) — toxic behavior ! cheating ! breaking-up mentions ! very much made based on personal opinions + i tried to write the characters off as canon as possible, but my favoritism will probably show ! sukuna is a warning of his own tbh ! violence + blood + death (mentions) ! cannibalism (mentions) ! angst (mostly) ! some are implied yandere ! not really dark content but i will tag as so just to be sure, some of them are dc vibes ! mentions about marriage + having kids (biologically and not) !

୨୧ CHOSO KAMO — beige flag.

not the reddest flag of the list. although, still has some fails. . .

this may come as a surprise to many, but choso is not a green flag. he’s perfectly in the middle, i think. not nearly as bad as others on the list, but his track record isn't perfect, either.

BIGGEST RED FLAG? he's family-centered.

choso is, as is well known, a man completely focused on his family. the joy of his brothers and relatives is his priority, and he will always be more focused on others than on himself (this could also be a red flag, he is quite selfless). he carries the burden and honor of being a big brother. of course because of his love for you, you are as much a part of the family as his siblings are.

however, if you don’t get along with his siblings for any reason, it’s very likely that the relationship won't be able to continue. it would be troublesome if you can’t take his true nature ── as a half-curse ── well, too. it would really upset him, because love is about acceptance and care.

DO YOU NEED TO BE A SORCERER?

the answer is: no, but it is preferable that you are. being a sorcerer, you would have a much easier time understanding the abnormal aspects of his life (him and his family). if you’re not a sorcerer, it makes things a little chaotic. choso wouldn't want to lie to you about who he really is, his origins, and obviously, he would be prevented from introducing his (monstrous) brothers to you in that circumstance.

this would make him reflect for a long time, which ends either with a breakup, or with him showing you everything about jujutsu. living under a false identity and with a life built on lies is not how he wants the relationship to be.

WOULD HE CHEAT ON YOU?

absolutely not. choso is aware of how heartbroken you would feel if he ever did that — besides, it's not like he feels desire or romantic love for anyone else. he has no reasons to cheat on you, and he never will have.

OTHER OBSERVATIONS.

choso has good intentions, but romantic love is a new and unknown field for him. this makes him inexperienced and often irrational towards romance. the information about relationships is too fresh and unprocessed for him, and it's all from the dead brain of the vessel he inhabits. he is not completely unaware about all of it, but his lack of experience shows.

he is very hasty and believes that the status of “boyfriend” is not bad, just that “husband” would be much better. if you don’t see a future, why would you be with him? he doesn’t understand when you correct him you are just dating and not married (you've been together for barely two months).

choso is not the type to let fights happen without reason, and he tries hard to make things work out, but he’s constantly overprotective and his affection can quickly become suffocating.

choso loves family. he wishes to expand it someday. and who would be better to help him besides you, his true love? besides taking care of his brothers, he would like to be a father himself one day (at least, a better one than his own father was), and there is this underexpectation — not exactly spoken out loud until he is confronted about it. choso wouldn't want to pressure you, and he would understand your choices and respect your decisions perfectly if you don’t want to have children, however, he gets a little sad over it nonetheless and always wonders if you would change your mind if he asked more nicely.

of course, we can’t forget the amount of people he killed (in and out of shibuya). this is a factor that is rarely talked about and choso doesn’t even think about it anymore, honestly. if you can ignore that, good! if not? well. . .

୨୧ HIROMI HIGURUMA — green / beige flag.

objection! he did nothing wrong (except for, at least, 22 murders, i guess).

BIGGEST RED FLAG? married to his work.

this is a completely personal view, but it’s hard to date someone so busy and married to their work. pre-culling game, the grueling overtime and mountains of paperwork would constantly keep him away from you ── from dates, from nights together, from romantic trips. furthermore, his ideal of justice is always dangerously close to failure in practically every situation hiromi faces, and this is a source of stress for him. he wouldn’t take it out on you, there’s no reason, but of course. it’s difficult to balance so many hours of work and such an important goal with personal relationships.

it’s not that he forgets commemorative dates, he merely doesn’t have time to celebrate them themselves. when he can’t be there for whatever the occasion is, he’ll send some expensive gift and an apology card, or call you and start a conversation for eight minutes to explain why he forgot your second anniversary. it’s common for him to come home, and you’re already asleep. you simply don’t have time.

in the culling game situation, it’s not so much work that keeps you apart, but training, focus and purpose. he focuses more on your protection and his than on romanticism, which can end up creating emotional barriers that are very difficult to break ── on both sides. hiromi is accidentally cold quite often. and that’s if you ignore the number of people he had to kill.

DO YOU NEED TO BE A SORCERER?

honestly: yes and no. is a simple question with a difficult answer. hiromi prefers someone who can understand him completely: his feelings, his work, what he wants the justice system to become, and his vision of justice. so when he finally receives this new power that not only matches all of this but can make it possible, it’s very complicated to have a partner who doesn’t understand this new part of your life. he’s another person who wouldn’t lie to you about his nature. he swore to tell the truth, always the truth, and only the truth.

if you are a sorcerer, things get easier and harder. a relationship with hiromi has certain nuances, such as his constant concern for your safety, regardless of what you are (sorcerer or not). he believes in your own strength, but would like to stick around just to make sure you’re going to be okay. his change between coldness and sudden closeness can make feelings very raw and difficult to deal with.

if you’re not a sorcerer, his protection gets even worse. he’s not suffocating because he takes care not to be, but he would genuinely go crazy if something happened to you because he was careless. anyone who touches you won’t come out alive and brag about it. he just wants you to be okay.

WOULD HE CHEAT ON YOU?

no. hiromi is loyal to all his oaths, whether they are about protecting justice or being by your side even in sickness and in health.

OTHER OBSERVATIONS.

he is very open and honest. it might be bad in certain situations, but it’s great for the bigger picture. he doesn’t hide his opinions from you and is willing to talk about almost any topic peacefully. fights with him are actually quite rare, because hiromi thinks it’s fair to listen to his side, then speak his own, and think together to see if you can resolve this peacefully. depending on the angle, this is another problem, in a way he tends to rationalize feelings very often.

despite all the negatives, he has a surprisingly good memory. he doesn’t forget special occasions, he simply didn’t have time to be there in person (which is still a con). but he remembers everything else about you. hiromi is the type to look at you with a slight smile on his face, looking like his words are going in one ear and out the other. but when you stop talking, he gets confused. “why did you stop? i want to know what happens next.”

୨୧ MEGUMI FUSHIGURO — green / beige flag.

honestly, a good option. if you’re able to catch up.

megumi is a better boyfriend than people would think, honestly. the issue, with him, is more about himself and his view of himself than you ──, but it still affects the relationship and your experiences together as a couple.

BIGGEST RED FLAG? no respect for his own safety.

as a jujutsu sorcerer, it’s perfectly common for megumi to get into situations that risk his neck. it’s as much a part of the job as anything else. the problem is his willingness to put himself in danger for the sake of a greater good, or greater goal that he needs / wants to achieve. he is bold and reckless, and can be very harmful to both him and you.

other than that, he’ not necessarily a very bad boyfriend. megumi doesn’t have as many communication problems as expected, although he can put up fights — especially on this specific subject, trying to justify his lack of care with “doing what was necessary”.

dying to win is not an idea he is opposed to, until someone (like you or gojo) puts some sense into him.

DO YOU NEED TO BE A SORCERER?

not really. megumi would love you regardless of your ability and strength ── and would find qualities to admire anyway. he doesn’t think you’re incapable of protecting yourself, and a part of him is tempted not to introduce you to jujutsu if you’re not a sorcerer. it would be a fully, normal thing in his life, but he wouldn’t want to lie to you in any way.

WOULD HE CHEAT ON YOU?

definitely not. megumi has way too much respect, admiration, and above all, love for you to do something atrocious like that.

OTHER OBSERVATIONS.

megumi is reckless, but at the same time he listens to what you say and can slowly learn to take care of himself in a more efficient way through your words and worry. he doesn’t forget precedents or dates, and he takes good care of anything you’ve given him. his shikigami love you, sincerely, so he would be happy if you could see them and interact with them ── because they are a reflection of their owner and end up showing all the affection he feels for you and doesn’t have the courage to show it.

he’s not cold or distant, just more reserved, but he could be more vocal about his feelings instead of dropping hints and hoping you understand what he means. everything about megumi is soft, even when it shouldn't be.

his inclination is indoor dates and having alone time with you that doesn’t involve his friends in any way. he has nothing against any of them ── they are dear people to both him and you, megumi is just inclined towards privacy and doesn’t want your time together to be interrupted. especially if you are a busy person who doesn’t have much opportunity to spend time with him.

despite being quiet, he is a little jealous often. not on a controlling level or anything like that, but he could easily end up making greater gestures to reinforce his dominance over your heart ── a treasure more precious than any cursed jewel. grabbing your waist gently and pulling you closer when he notices someone staring is not an uncommon occurrence.

୨୧ KENTO NANAMI — green flag.

i have nothing to say besides: you’re lucky — really. this man is a blessing.

nanami is honestly the ideal kind of guy no matter what life you want to lead. He honestly tries to balance his personal life with the work he so fervently hates, and he understands and helps you doing the same.

BIGGEST RED FLAG — emotional walls (eventually lets them down).

one of the few things that are not respectable about this man is that he really takes a long time before showing himself vulnerable in any way, shape, or form. nanami's experience makes him a very cold and harsh guy on the outside, but with well-defined morals and a heart of gold. he's also inclined towards privacy, just like megumi, and would prefer if you didn't get too involved in his circle of friends (more because of gojo than anything else, really).

DO YOU NEED TO BE A SORCERER?

no. not really. nanami appreciates the normality and calmness that can come from a life with you. he genuinely doesn't care if you're a sorcerer or if you're the head of the marketing department.

impressively, he's not as protective as others on the list. of course, he worries about your safety, but he doesn't doubt his own ability to be there to protect you if needed.

WOULD HE CHEAT ON YOU?

no, never. nanami is very adamant and loyal to you in all situations — he can't be tempted by someone else, because all he desires is you.

OTHER OBSERVATIONS.

as already mentioned, nanami prefers that you not get involved in his social circle, especially if you are a non-sorcerer. this is due to the fact that his senpai is clueless and could often create very uncomfortable situations. furthermore, he is afraid that you will be interested in more of his acquaintances and end up discovering/getting more involved with jujutsu.

he's very supportive of pretty much every decision you make ── as long as it doesn't hurt you and doesn't seem rushed without thought. he makes a point of looking for you for conversations that he considers necessary and punctuating whatever is needed.

nanami is very analytical too. if the two of you set a goal, agree on its repercussions and after a long time, decide on it ── like, for example, having a family ── he works hard to make it happen. it is not uncommon for him to agree to work overtime to receive a salary bonus to prepare a surprise for you, or support you better. he doesn't doubt your independence in the slightest, but he would like to constantly give you gifts as thanks for your divine presence in his life.

kento is very kind and basically the height of chivalry. for those who say that romanticism is dead, it's because they've never seen your boyfriend tying your shoelaces, carrying you on his lap, taking you to romantic dinners and making dinner for the two of you.

୨୧ SATORU GOJO — beige flag.

strongest sorcerer, a charming man, and good at flirting. although, an actual relationship? oh, boy. . .

satoru isn't necessarily a bad boyfriend per se. he's far from the worst option on the list, but he genuinely has a lot of problems that would make a relationship fall apart.

BIGGEST RED FLAG? emotionally unavailable.

satoru's personal experience has made him carry the burden of being the strongest sorcerer during his entire life. it's his identity to nearly everyone else — the satoru gojo, and not just satoru. it feels set in stone.

he doesn't have close friends or a support group that he feels he can genuinely trust fully since suguru's betrayal. this rubs off on you and makes him avoid really emotional conversations or directly saying what he's feeling — even when it's necessary. it's almost impossible to make his emotional walls come down, and if they do, he'll probably act a little sour for a while ── a kind of reflex, where he's wary of the idea of being betrayed once again.

being vulnerable is not his strong suit.

DO YOU NEED TO BE A SORCERER?

no, but it's preferable that you are. not only because you would understand him and his capabilities much better, but because as a sorcerer you would have your own worryingly long workload, and wouldn't make such a big deal about him almost never being home. at least, he thinks so, but he wouldn't avoid a relationship with you if you weren't a sorcerer.

also, he gets worried about you constantly — he has lots of enemies that could try to hurt you to get to him. if you're a sorcerer, at least he can believe more easily that you can defend yourself.

WOULD HE CHEAT ON YOU?

personally, i don't think he would. as already mentioned, gojo's inability to be with just one woman is, in my view, his inability to be vulnerable and honest.

OTHER OBSERVATIONS.

personally, i interpret “satoru is the type of man who cannot be faithful to a woman” precisely because of the emotional problem. he can't be vulnerable and that only gets the relationship to a certain point before it stops working completely. it's very, very difficult to get past the defenses he's created for himself, and there's always the chance he'll get scared and decide to leave.

the gojo clan isn't really a hindrance ── what are they actually going to do, argue with their only relevant member? ── but they can be quite uncomfortable. the person with the strongest sorcerer needs, in their view, to be “proper.” this includes: being a sorcerer and having many strong children for a new generation.

if you do not meet these requirements for any reason (not wanting or not being able to have children), the clan is unfriendly towards you. this doesn't stop the relationship in any way, or it doesn't stop you and satoru from getting married one day, however, it is quite awkward.

regardless of whether you are a sorcerer or not, there is a gulf of difference between satoru's lifestyle and yours. while he doesn't have difficulties with money or power ── and maybe you do ── this means he can't quite understand what it's like to be in your shoes. he's not unfriendly, but his arrogant and defensive nature can really lead to a silly fight or two that escalates depending on the situation.

୨୧ SUGURU GETO — red flag.

i love suguru, but he’s undeniably not an ideal partner.

i don't think there's much doubt about whether geto would be a red flag. he is. even if you consider his nature in the relationship more than his personality itself, it's still the case.

BIGGEST RED FLAG (besides the genocide nature)? — manipulative.

as a very skilled cult leader and orator, suguru has an indescribable charisma and a well-directed charm ── be it to convert those he calls monkeys or to enlist sorcerers to his cause. however, this charm can also be used on you and your relationship.

intentionally or not, he ends up trying to convince you of the same things he does. either his own distorted belief ── or his apologies become attempts at manipulation. he's not beyond gaslighting you, either. he learns what type of action provokes a specific reaction from you and ends up acting very artificially sometimes.

the benevolent cult leader persona he uses on non-sorcerers mixes with the real suguru geto, and that's definitely something scary to have in a relationship.

DO YOU NEED TO BE A SORCERER?

yes. there's just no other way. sorry, it's geto.

WOULD HE CHEAT ON YOU?

not really. capturing geto's attention isn't really an easy thing, and maintaining your position as his partner is just as hard a task. i don't see him having eyes for anyone else, because i feel that if you were in a relationship, he would need to have some kind of attachment to you and wouldn't want to hurt you on purpose.

despite this, in those ridiculously impossible situations — if he could achieve the world he wants by sleeping with someone else, would he do it? then the answer is yes. but i don't know if that counts.

OTHER OBSERVATIONS.

he is more married to his cause than he would ever be to you. he will not change for you, nor he will abandon his dream. that's a thought you can't let go of your mind when you're with him. no matter your own actions and beliefs, the new world must be created using any and all means necessary. no price is too high, no one is too innocent to be sacrificed.

being around someone like that would not only be exhausting but terrifying. there is always the uncertainty of what he would do if you left him. on the one hand, suguru doesn't want to hurt you. on the other hand, as his partner, you would know too many valuable things to just leave. he would never let you go like that.

it's very important not to forget that suguru definitely suffers from delusions of grandeur and high expectations of himself and everything around him. whether it's about the new world, his role in it, or about you. he faces some frustration when this expectations are not met, but he does his best not to take it out on you.

he might even "forgive" the fact that you don't actively fight to kill non-sorcerers, like he does, but he wouldn't want you to interact with them other than when it's absolutely necessary. furthermore, suguru would require absolute hygiene. don't touch him if you've been too close to a non-sorcerer. in cases where you have shaken someone's hand or hugged someone, he will refuse to talk to you until you wash your hands or take a shower.

and if you see non-sorcerers as people, as lives who matter, it will be absolutely worse. it would certainly be a very frequent topic of discussion between the two of you, so opposing views would make the relationship unsustainable. but staying silently by his side makes you accomplice — the blood of all these people will be on your hands, because you knew.

you knew and you did nothing to stop him, nonetheless.

୨୧ SUKUNA RYOMEN — red flag.

do i have to say anything? nevermind. i’ll pray for your soul instead. lord have mercy on you — because sukuna won’t.

if you were so unfortunate as to capture the king of curses' attention in this way, i can only be so sorry.

BIGGEST RED FLAG? he's sukuna.

it's hard to know where to start when naming his worst red flag. would it be his violent nature? his overall behavior? the sadistic desire for death and the total lack of morals? sukuna knows nothing but power, and has no respect for anything other than himself or equivalent strength. it makes your relationship with him less of a romantic thing — and more like an owner-pet relationship.

DO YOU NEED TO BE A SORCERER?

i'm inclined to say yes, because it's difficult to see where sukuna would be interested in a non-sorcerer. regardless, i guess it doesn't really matter as long as you fit his twisted and bizarre criteria, somehow.

WOULD HE CHEAT ON YOU?

no, but not for the reasons you think. love is an unknown and irrelevant concept to him, so what really stops him from cheating on you is not moral. it's desire, or rather, the lack of it. no one is as interesting as you in that sense.

he wouldn't cheat on you simply because there is no one else he wants like that. but not in a romantic sense, like nanami. it's like someone who is so engrossed in one thing in particular that in comparison, everything is gray and rotten.

OTHER OBSERVATIONS.

there's very little i can describe without being extremely dark compared to other reviews. sukuna would play with you until he got tired, and when he did, he would send you to the pot and enjoy a nice dinner.

i think the closest thing that can be called showing affection from him is when he asks uraume to be extra careful with the meat this time. he had, somehow, a strange feeling for you that he didn't understand. even tired, he wouldn't forget a human who fascinated him so deeply. furthermore, it would be agonizing for other sorcerers and humans. sukuna would not be actively looking for replacements, but sincerely. if he was, he would be disappointed. sometimes he turns to bark a mean comment, just to not see you there, and murmur oh, right, knowing very well he is the reason.

despite this, he may feel some kind of affection for you. sort of. the kind of pity you would feel for a beggar on the street, or the feeling you have for a pet, in some way. he would never see you as an equal. an interesting creature, but beneath him, as it is your place.

none of this would ever stop him from killing you if you became a nuisance, though.

୨୧ TOGE INUMAKI — green flag.

few words, but a lot of action and gentleness.

after a horror show committed by our favorite cannibal, a good look at our favorite ingredient talker should cool us down nicely. toge is actually the type to act instead of talk, because, well. . . salmon?

BIGGEST RED FLAG? bad communication.

even if you are a great sign language interpreter, there will be communication problems in your relationship. sometimes you may not understand what he is saying, or the other way around.

this is not a fatal defect, but it certainly exists, and needs to be addressed accordingly. furthermore, it is difficult to have serious conversations or argue. it's very annoying not being able to have a serious dialogue without hearing an onigiri ingredient in response. but it becomes a bit habitual for you and it doesn't make that much of a difference — it's the way he needs to communicate and you understand. toge understands how difficult it can be to communicate with him and does his best to help the process.

DO YOU NEED TO BE A SORCERER?

i'm tempted to say absolutely not, but if you're not a sorcerer there's no chance of you having a relationship without you at least knowing about jujutsu. in any case, you will be inserted into this world and this context, but honestly it doesn't matter to him. as long as it is you.

WOULD HE CHEAT ON YOU?

no, not at all. man can barely speak to his friends, how could he even chat with someone else and cheat behind your back? despite all the jokes, it's not really toge's thing.

sure, he can't directly tell someone else he's rejecting them — again, communication —, but he just needs to show his ring and they'll leave him alone. usually. he does not entertain flirtation from anyone who's not you, though.

OTHER OBSERVATIONS.

loving toge is as calming an experience as it is chaotic. he wants to do everything that “more normal people” would do too. for example, going on dates in big, crowded places — even if a part of him screams internally when not being able to talk to you like these people do. and honestly, even when he merely wishes for the simple, he just wants you to be happy and enjoy. your relationship is something very important to him, and there would certainly be a doubt if he can be a sorcerer and be your boyfriend at the same time. inumaki's lifestyle is not really something anyone wishes for their significant other, after all, but he was willing to try.

despite not being able to speak, he always has a cell phone and a notepad at hand. it's common for you to find small notes and loving notes, or his messages. love messages, messages asking how your day was, messages telling you that you forgot your lunch — giving him the perfect opportunity to just slip away and personally hand it over to you. he turns down the collar of his coat to return your smile when doing so.

toge also has a habit of sending you pictures like cute cats and a small love poem. he never wants you to feel appreciated — and everytime his friends tease him for smiling like a fool to the phone, he murmurs an affectionate “okaka”.

୨୧ TOJI FUSHIGURO — beige / red flag.

already experienced with love, a hurt heart can literally end everything.

the experience of being in a relationship with toji can be the happiest thing in your life or the most toxic addiction possible. it really depends on a single factor: is he able to love you truly, even after mamaguro? he'll be the only character in this list with two “separated” versions.

BIGGEST RED FLAG? emotionally distant / inconsiderate.

in a world where he can love you just like he loved megumi's mother, toji has a lot of emotional baggage that is difficult to deal with. his job is dangerous, he had an extensive past with another woman and an abandoned son, it's a lot for both him and you. it's very difficult to get close to him at first, but he slowly opens up and is willing to change and improve his life, getting a new start with you. one he won't lose.

in a world where he can't love you, he just doesn't care. you're just another partner he hooks up with occasionally, and he makes that clear. he's not interested in anything serious, not marriage, not anything. you are not the love of his life and you will not be. and if you feel bad about these words? well. you're out of luck.

DO YOU NEED TO BE A SORCERER?

definitely not. he couldn't care less in any case.

WOULD HE CHEAT ON YOU?

again, that depends. if he loves you truly, hell no. anyone who comes to flirt with him while he is in a relationship with you will be ignored and likely humiliated if he persists. if you managed to capture this man's heart, congratulations, he's all yours.

if he doesn't love you — yeah. pretty much. then it's more about if he wants someone else than your feelings.

OTHER OBSERVATIONS.

there's not much to say about toji's part and his role in a relationship, except that it won't be easy in any case. the past is the ghost that haunts every man, conscious or not. and his is full of blood, guts, tears and lost love. being willing to deal with this is not only necessary but something he won't forget. it's very difficult to win his loyalty permanently, but if you do, you simply have to worry about it anymore.

if he does not love you, it's very likely that he will eventually leave you for someone richer. money is mainly what would keep him in a relationship — sex is just a bonus. when some of those ends up being too difficult to get (or when these things are missing), his lack of emotional attachment makes him easily turn around and leave, to never returning again.

୨୧ YUJI ITADORI — green flag.

a very good option! the problem is that it is not long-lasting.

yuji is a sweetheart, really. definitely not a bad choice (one of the best ones in this list!). although, he has a very unfortunate destiny in front of him.

BIGGEST RED FLAG? he's way too selfless.

being selfless is a great quality, but in cases like yuji's, things go overboard very easily. he doesn't have as much respect or admiration for himself as he does for other people, and this can definitely be very damaging to his mental health and, consequently, your relationship.

he takes risks for his friends and strangers, he swallows cursed objects, he does his best to save lives — and he blames himself under fail, despite it not being his fault. he's the kind of man who carries the weight of the world on his shoulders, and doesn't want you to exhaust yourself trying to share it with him.

DO YOU HAVE TO BE A SORCERER?

not really, but if you're not, the relationship ends very quickly and suddenly. yuji wouldn't allow himself to tell you about jujutsu, being the vessel of sukuna, and anything that puts you under risk. this includes staying close to him.

he wouldn't break up with you just because you're not a sorcerer, he just values your safety too much and is afraid of what could happen. if you are one, he feels slightly relieved you won't separate, but still tense. you can still die.

WOULD HE CHEAT ON YOU?

he would never. never, ever. you're his love and he could never betray your trust like that. in one occasion, he said he wouldn't cheat on you even if it were with jennifer lawrence.

OTHER OBSERVATIONS.

the most important point to make is that yuji will undeniably die. he would be executed, and he thinks he should be, and that was the order given since he made a mistake that day. one day, and his life changed forever. having a relationship with you is one of the few lasting joys in his life, but when it ends for whatever reason, it will hurt more. maybe he'll try to break up with you sooner and move away so you don't feel so upset about losing him.

yuji is also the guy who was thrown into the context of the jujutsu world in a very unfortunate situation — he can be very slow to understand some things and, if you are a sorcerer, fearful. he understands that many sorcerers have important reputations to maintain. maybe you have too. in that case, wouldn't it be better not to have a relationship with sukuna's vessel in your past? what if the higher-ups antagonize you for that, and your career can't succeed? he doesn't want to make you uncomfortable about the topic, and he often doesn't say what he's feeling directly. yuji doesn't lie, but he omits.

he is very anxious despite his constant positive attitude. sukuna likes to mess with yuji's mental health, and he knows how much you mean to him. yuji would purposely turn away from you very often, terrified that somehow, the king of curses would kill you simply to laugh at his expense. he can't lose you — the ironic thing is that maybe he would lose, distancing himself so much.

୨୧ YUTA OKKOTSU — green / beige flag.

not bad, but. . . very questionable, nonetheless.

last, but not least! the implicitly yandere yuta okkotsu — not by far the worst option we have out of all of them here, but. he has almost unforgivable habits.

BIGGEST RED FLAG — rika (?)

everyone agrees that seeing your boyfriend's first love as a bloody, inhuman ghost is a pretty uncomfortable experience. in your case, it is an uncomfortable and constant experience, happening practically on a daily basis. although rika is much more controlled nowadays, and she is more a manifestation of technique than a soul in itself — it's not the kind of thing that anyone just finds normal. even sorcerers.

unfortunately, your boyfriend's late first love is kind of always there anyway. he still wears the ring he needs to connect with her, even if he gave you a different one. it's strange and sometimes it gives the impression that either you are a replacement, or that you will never reach that level of affection. you're the other woman in your own relationship.

DO YOU NEED TO BE A SORCERER?

again, no. but it's preferable that you are. all the difficult issues of being a sorcerer would be better understood if you were one yourself. it would also avoid him lying to you / hiding jujutsu from you. furthermore, yuta is a paranoid mess.

he always imagines that the second he's not around, you're going to get hurt. he cannot stand even the weakest curses near you, crushing them like repulsive insects.

WOULD HE CHEAT ON YOU?

no, unless you consider rika and his “relationship” with her.

OTHER OBSERVATIONS.

honestly, the time you have with yuta always seems to be under the influence of an hourglass, limited. ready to end at any second, where his work will be a constant interruption. he tries and tries very hard not to let this undermine his relationship, but it can become an occasional problem. he had to spend long periods of time in other countries, and it hurts for him to be so far away.

yuta is strangely clingy. you can't expect anything less. he's the kind of boyfriend who can easily become overprotective in a way that's not cute. always guiding you to one side on the sidewalk, one hand around your waist, staring deathly at any man who gets too close. it doesn't matter if it's his friend or a mutual friend of yours, there is a certain distance that everyone must respect when it comes to you. except him.

besides being like a cat (very skittish with some people, invades your personal space very frequently), yuta is very demanding in some aspects. he really hates it if someone flirts with you, even though he wouldn't take that frustration out on you. after all, it's not your fault and it would be unfair. but he's very adamant about not having any secrets or personal things he doesn't know about. secrets kill people, and he can't bear to lose you.

despite all the lessons he learned with rika, sometimes you end up wondering if he will curse you too, if you end up dying. you ask him about it. if he would. yuta doesn't answer.

ENGLISH IS NOT MY FIRST LANGUAGE. I APOLOGIZE FOR ANY MISTAKES. thank you for reading! <3

#kirell. kills .ᐟ #twisting in the dark. #jjk x reader #jjk x y/n #jjk x you #jujutsu kaisen x reader #jujutsu kaisen x you #choso x you #higuruma x reader #megumi x reader #nanami x reader #gojo x reader #geto x reader #sukuna x reader #toge x reader #yuta x reader #yuji x reader #jujutsu kaisen headcanons #jjk hcs #jjk headcanons #x reader

[blkkizzat]

'SINS OF THE FATHER'

PRIEST!NANAMI X READER

✟ the liturgy: (summary) Even the most pious of men succumb to temptation and Father Kento is no exception... especially when it comes to you. (Priest!Nanami POV) ✟ the confession: (tw) dark themes, sacrilege, adultery, blasphemy, jealously, exhibitionism, blackmail/manipulation, heavy biblical references, cunnalingus, fingering, riding dick, shoe fucking, blow jobs, panty sniffing, olfactophilia, dacryphilia, lightly suggested altarboy!yuji (aged-up) x reader, oil tycoon!gojo x reader, suggested mentions of reader x other jjk men, corruption, masturbation and angst as you are literally tormenting this poor priest (lol). ✟ the sins: (wc) 4.1k ✟ the opening rites:(a/n) i grew up catholic (got confirmed too) and went to catholic school but haven't stepped inside a church in literal years. i was honestly surprised how many bible references came so easily from pure memory while writing this.

Sanctified conviction radiates off Father Kento as he approaches the inordinately adorned wood carved pulpit with authority to address his congregation. 

Despite the uncomfortable Summer heat there is no lack of attendance, a sea of familiar faces packed into the small town chapel. The buzzing song of cicadas and soft oscillation of the large fan circulating humid air through the church are the only sounds heard as the masses eagerly await his homily.

You were among them of course. 

Sitting front and center– a small saccharine smile graced your lips while your doe-like eyes, captivated and attentive, were made even bigger as they raised to the podium to meet his own.

Bible open, Father Kento takes a full breath pause before he finally speaks, his gaze is benevolent yet his voice is firm as it projects over the congregation. 

“Dear Brothers and Sisters– Let us reflect on the gospel of First Corinthians Chapter 10 Verse 13…and The Lord says– ‘There hath no temptation taken you but such as is common to man—”

Oh but you– you were anything but common– and irregardless of any higher standing his status as a clergy member bestowed upon him he was still a man of flesh and blood.

No matter the effort exerted, Father Kento had been unable to keep his eyes from yours during the service. The magnetism of unknown and certainly unholy forces drew him to you time and again without fail.

No beauty in town rivaled yours, not with an angelic countenance that complemented your delicate features so gracefully in your every action. 

Yours was a form of divine femininity rivaling that of Venus herself. 

If that wasn’t beguiling enough, your honeyed voice and syrupy words had the ability to sway even the most feral of temperaments. Leaving those who heard it at your mercy like a gentle but deadly siren.

“—but God is faithful, who will not suffer you to be tempted above that ye are able—”

Is God faithful? 

Ironic how you had Father Kento questioning the very foundations of his own faith while simultaneously indoctrinating God’s dogma to his faithful parishioners.  

If you were a test he had failed. 

Many times.

Even the first man, Adam, had fallen to Eve’s allures and not even the warrior strength of Samson was able to overcome Delilah’s seductions. 

Who was he to prevail where the biblical idols had fallen?

What actual grace could God give man against the sensual temptation that he had carved from man’s own rib? 

Father Kento had felt forsaken of God’s grace ever since you had approached him after mass to quietly request the rites of confession. He should have refused when you kindly solicited him to perform them in the cooler confines of the secluded rectory over the oven-like heat of a chapel confessional box in summer. 

Led astray so effortlessly by your genial charms as you looked to him like a lamb lost and addressed him so meekly as “Father Kento”. He would have just as easily given you access to heaven then if it were in his power.

Yet it was you who had so graciously led him to the gates of Zion— which so conveniently happened to reside in the velvety depths between your thighs. 

Consequently, the only sins that were confessed in the rectory that day were the moist squelches of your peach-ripened pussy gushing around his cock and coalescing with the frenzied sounds of hot flesh slapping together in unison. 

A child of Lilth incarnate to be sure but you looked so pure and celestial, even in ecstasy.

Hair matted to the sides of your face drenched in sweat while your nimble hands clutched onto his clerical collar. Your eyes filled with such loving devotion and you rode him earnestly as if it was your life’s penance. 

Father Kento in turn gives you his absolution by taking you from behind. The swell of your plump rear rippling against his hips and shared fluids splashing onto his hard abdomen feverishly drive him closer to God than he’d ever been.

Yes, he is weak. 

But Father Kento held the conviction that not even The Vicar of Christ, the Pope himself would be able to resist the vice grip of your silken cunt as if its true purpose was never to bear life but to wring out the very essence of the soul of man. 

He’d fallen prey to a day-walking succubus on hallowed holy grounds. 

No– Father Kento was certain if this church had ever truly been blessed as a house of God you would have caught aflame the moment you graced its threshold. 

“—but will with the temptation also make a way to escape, that ye are able to bear it’.”

Father Kento concluded the passage. Nonetheless, neither it nor any other doctrine had provided him the solace of escape and nor biblical strength did he receive to endure against his temptations.

There was no resisting you. 

There was no escaping you. 

For anyone you cast your sights on.

This is exemplified by the obvious effect you have on the young alter boy Yuji. 

Barely old enough to be called a man, the youth's entire body flinches whenever you spare a sweet glance in his direction. 

Has Yuji’s innocence already been stolen? 

Father Kento must quell the inkling of jealousy at the thought lest he stumble over his words and shame himself further.

He was a man in every sense of the word and a man of the cloth, he would not compete for your adulterous affections with his own altar boy.

Even so, Father Kento’s lip does curl in disapproval at the deep flush of guilt on Yuji’s cheeks. Yuji clumsily trips over his own feet, nearly permitting the blessed vessels for the rites of eucharist to fall to the ground.

Harlot! Have you really allowed someone other than himself to bathe in the sins of Jezebel?

Maintaining composure through his sermon, Father Kento reminds himself that an inexperienced youth is no threat. 

However it is more than likely Yuji– who normally is so oblivious in nature– had likewise become aware of the wicked exhibition of sacrilege occurring beneath the prayer cloth in your lap at the very hands of your own husband– Satoru Gojo.

“So you may ask where does that leave us as followers of Christ? Temptations lure us into doing, saying or thinking something that does not reflect who we really are as sons and daughters of God.”

Neither you nor your husband were Christ’s children so none of these ideologies applied to either of you.

Nefarious philistines the both of you– godless and immoral.

Although Father Kento was for certain your husband, Oil Tycoon, Satoru Gojo– was the only one whose deeds could put yours to shame. 

The white haired devil had descended upon the quiet small town like a thief in the night to greedily capture the first few drops of black gold that surged from the earth before it could even fall to the ground. Quickly buying up land and resources, in less than a fortnight Gojo essentially had control over the entire town– its priest included.

But as he became more wealthy, so did the town and its people. Satoru Gojo built up the town around him to match his own gluttony for opulence, taking the town and its people away from simple old time comforts and into the more complex modern age. 

Therefore the man was seen as a saintly savior, rather than the lecherous leech he truly was.

To Father Kento’s credit, if he deserved any at all– he had initially held strong in his faith. 

He was not a man tempted by the power that would come from a promotion to bishop if a larger church was built. Nor was he tempted by monetary gain. The treasures he had always held most valuable were only those to be found in God’s kingdom.

Familiar with the tricks masked by flamboyant arrays of grandior, Father Kento’s folly had been his own headstrong vainglory in being a man above the lures of temptation. Thus he failed in recognizing you as the seductive snake in sheep's clothing the cunning tycoon Gojo had sent to be his undoing.

And you had never once failed to unravel him.

Even now Father Kento struggles to keep himself together as you inconspicuously lean against your husband, your head resting gently on his shoulder while the dainty fan you are holding obscures the lower half of your face. 

What appears as an innocuous attempt to halt the perspiration rolling from your nape into your heaving bosom is merely a front to hide the sinful ‘o’ your cherry lips form.

Your chest softly heaves although your labored breaths aren’t from the humid heat shrouding the church– but the increasing warmth dampening in your loins. All which had been provoked by your husband slipping two fingers through the buttons of your thin sundress and into your pussy, lightly teasing its gooey folds. Gojo’s movements are mostly concealed by the cloth but Father Kento can make out the skillful circular motions stroking your spongy bud and causing the sporadic twitch in your knees. 

You had writhed similarly under him. You were always far too sensitive.

Fat tears would never fail to pour from your bright eyes when he would latch his mouth onto your sex. You would be his last supper if ever given the choice. If heaven had a flavor it would surely be akin to the taste of your pink candied cunt and he knew of no sweeter treat on earth.

Twas no wonder then how Father Kento easily loses all sense of self when flicking his tongue into your gaping slit. Swirling the appendage within your gummy walls he gluttonously slurps down the steady stream of your flowing nectar. 

Your mewls and cries for him are far lovelier than even the song of cherubim. Father Kento has committed them to memory and as such he knows when they reach a certain octave– your pitch so high it's practically soundless– you're nearing your nirvana.

Arriving at your peak you would thread your hands through his blonde locks and thrust your hips forward as if his mouth were salvation itself. Your manicured nails would dig into his scalp to rock his head deeper into your plump pussy. The actions would beckon his tongue to finally give you its mercy by dragging it flat up your folds to suckle and nip at your swollen clit.

You never called on God then. 

Nor your husband. 

Only Father Kento.

Coincidentally, Father Kento’s gaze locks with Gojo’s for a brief moment and Gojo’s pale lips curl into smirk. 

A fleeting look is shared before contact is broke but the message is clear: 

Satoru Gojo own’s everything in this town. 

Gojo owns your cunt. 

Your cunt owns Father Kento.

Therefore by proxy Gojo owns him.

The revelation has Father Kento showing the white of his knuckles from the intensity of his grip on the pulpit podium as you simultaneously release a silent scream brazenly cumming on your husband’s dexterous fingers in the middle of mass. 

“The time now is propitious for us all to make a journey of conversion, led by sincere faith to allow ourselves to be confronted with the Gospel. Let us confirm this commitment by sharing in The Body and The Blood of Christ.”

Proceeding with communion the altar boy Yuji stands next to Father Kento holding the tray where the blessed chalice of wine and platter of thin wafers reside as the congregation dutifully exits their rows to receive the eucharist. 

As it is the more modern way to receive communion the majority of the congregation choses to place their non-dominant palm up over the other to respectfully receive the host. Yet traditionally, the priest placed the blessed wafer directly on the tongue of the one receiving. This practice was typically only seen by the elderly, the most exceedingly pious and of course— you.

When it is your turn to approach you beam brightly as you and all your beauty seem to float before him.

“The Body of Christ.”

Father Kento raises the host before you.

“Amen.” 

You obediently replied. 

Like expected your eyes fluttered to close as your pillowy lips parted in order to accept the host directly in your mouth. 

God help him, this was the most sacred part of mass but the way your deviant tongue lulls out hot and thick with your saliva pooled on the edge and threatening to spill onto your lips has Father Kento shifting at his post.

You look just as compliant and yearning to receive as when you had been on your knees before him taking his cock in your mouth whole.

Father Kento delicately placed the host in your mouth in a similar fashion as to when he would tap the tip of his bulbous leaking cockhead onto your tongue. 

So willing to please you kiss his angry red mushroom tip to appease his cock, swirling your tongue over the tiny hole before puckering it between your lips to greedily suck any drops of pre that dribbled forth as you pumped his base.

You were a tease. 

That much was evident both then and now as you extended the tip of your tongue to caress the tip of his finger. A tiny kitten lick, but nevertheless a tingle ran through his cock in remembrance.  

“The Blood of Christ.”

Father Kento presents the wine symbolizing the blood before you. 

“Amen.”

Again you closed your eyes and allowed Father Kento to press the chalice against your parted lips. 

The very picture of amenability, you actually enjoyed when he went rougher on you as a result of your teasing. Father Kento would gather your hair into a tight grip as he not-so-gently rammed his cock past your tonsils and down your throat. 

It was unnatural and ungodly for a person to lack any semblance of a gag reflex such as you. 

In response you pressed your fingers into his thighs– not as a means of resistance, but to control your own lust as you began shamelessly humping your mound against his leg. You were always desperate to feel any small sensation against your cunt while he ravaged your mouth.

Of course, Father Kento would oblige you and in turn he is rewarded with the heavy moans that would vibrate around his cock as his oxford loafer pushed up into your soaked core. Your white lace lingerie did little to contain your juices and as such Father Kento made use of the fluids leaking from your pussy as polish to shine his shoe.

Having sipped the wine from the chalice you peer up at Father Kento as if seeking his approval. 

He gives you a small nod. 

Similar to the one he bestows upon you after his seed has filled your stomach and you lick your lips as if it was his essence and not The Blood of Christ that lingered on them.

In the beginning, he had prayed long and hard to forget those sinful images of you that would intrude unwelcomed into his mind. 

Yet you always had ways of sucking him back in. 

Such as leaving your soiled panties stuffed between his headboard. Father Kento thought he was going mad when even after changing the sheets thrice was he still plagued with your smell.

He should have burned the offensive garment as soon as it was discovered and yet he treated it with reverence as if it were a holy object of salvation. Truly an euphoric experience, on days he couldn’t have you he’d bury his nose into the fabric murmuring blasphemy as he worshiped the very scent of you while jerking his cock.

When Father Kento finally ceased trying to resist you he then had the fleeting thought he could save you. Bring you to God and away from your villainous husband. 

But you were no Mary Magdalene, there was no returning you to the flock.

You will not leave your husband who provides you wealth and security. Father Kento is not so enamored he holds illusions that extend beyond his reality. There is nothing Father Kento owns and nothing he can offer you but himself. 

The singular consolation of the tragic circumstances is that Father Kento is sure you prefer his touch. The touch of a seemingly pious man who only has desires for you.

Unlike your scoundrel of a husband who Father Kento was sure had not remained faithful to your marriage bed. Not the way most of the female townsfolk threw themselves at Satoru Gojo. If he had no qualms using you to achieve his means he certainly had none for himself. 

You were simply a pawn to be played, as was Father Kento.

“Before we depart I leave you with these words: Let every day be a new day to renew the promises of our Baptism: We renounce Satan and all his works and seductions — for sh– *ahem* HE – is the seducer. Now go forth, Brothers and Sisters and remain true in the light of God.”

The closing rites over, Father Kento has never been more relieved nor eager for the conclusion of a mass. Watching the congregation mingle in the entrance, he gives his farewell blessings to the parishioners.

A few still remained however you were nowhere to be seen. 

This was not odd, the Gojos were a busy couple, likely excusing themselves immediately to attend to more important affairs.

Or so he hoped.

“There you are, Father! Riveting service, as always.”

With a devious grin and a firm drawn-out handshake Gojo greets Father Kento. Turning to face the devil himself, Father Kento greets Satoru in turn with a strained smile and an even firmer grip. 

Yet still he is unable to show you any of the wrath you justly deserve and Father Kento’s smile is more genuine when he faces you.  

You regard Father Kento coyly as your husband’s arm tightens around your waist. Your face is flushed and it’s evident you are still weakened from the orgasm your husband gave you earlier in front of the entire congregation. 

That knowledge though is only held by the three of you, God and perhaps the altar boy Yuji.

Father Kento had never known you to be silent when cumming so the exertion of the effort you expended likely weighed heavy on you as displayed by how you are clinging to Gojo to keep from swaying on your feet. 

“Thank you. I am but a humble messenger of The Lord’s wor–.”

“– Wait. Hold that thought!”

Father Kento’s eyebrow twitches as Gojo's attention is momentarily called elsewhere. 

Every Sunday, a growing number of parishioners would seek Satoru Gojo’s greeting and recognition after service over that of their priest Father Kento. 

True to character Gojo makes an obnoxious show of charisma which leaves the last group of parishioners fawning and singing his praises as they exit.

“Forgive me, Father. Where were we? Ah– Of course! Yes, you are quite excellent in your delivery of God’s word, a true testament to your faith!”

His flattery is so obviously false in its sincerity that Father Kento is not surprised when Gojo’s sordid smirk returns. 

“But you are not only a messenger for The Lord… isn’t that right, Father Kento?” 

Father Kento warily clutches onto the large cross dangling from the rosary around his neck as Gojo continues.

“I’ll need you to spread mine as well. Haven’t you heard? I have plans to run for Mayor.”

Mayor.

The diabolical fiend truly knew no limits in his quest for control over the town. 

“I’ll need you to come over to dinner tonight to consult with the rest of my top supporters.”

Father Kento steeled himself.. 

There was nothing he could do to stop Satoru Gojo from being mayor but his infatuation with you aside, he could not walk straight into the lion's den to collude with heathens. 

It would be the final nail in his coffin, Gojo would indeed own his soul.

“Oh! Y/N is prepping a feast too… aren’t you, angel?” 

Gojo’s grip on your waist trails lower to palm the fat of your ass and you clutch on to him tighter as you nod eagerly in agreement, biting your lip as his large hands knead into your cheeks through your wispy dress. 

Your body is ever responsive to Gojo’s touch just like he trained you to be.

“I must refuse. I have duties here to attend, I couldn’t poss–”

“P-Please F-Father…”

And just like that your delicate voice cuts through his iron defenses like it were warm butter.

“…K-Kento, p-please come!”

Your request fumbles out of your lips as a cry as Gojo’s devilish fingers dip past your ass to prod at your cunt.

“You heard her Father. She wants you to come. Break bread with us, you will be among friends. Friends who know how to share, yeah? I’ll even share a piece of her cream pie for dessert.” 

That had been the final straw. Gojo had gone too far this time.

You seeking him out was one matter but he would not allow Satoru Gojo of all people to dangle you in front of him like a master would dangle a treat to a dog.

“Begone, you foul heretic. I will not tolerate your mockery of me, this church nor God any longer.”

Commanding in his tone, Father Kento extends the cross of the rosary forward to Gojo as if he were casting a malevolent curse back down to hell. 

Father Kento doesn’t have the courage to look at you though, he can’t. Not if he wants to take a triumphant stand against Satoru Gojo.

And so Father Kento closes his eyes and silently prays. 

Immediately bored at such a devout display, Gojo sighs rolling his eyes.

“Alright, alright, Father. I get it. Whatever you say, jeez. It’s not like I need your support to become mayor– just thought it would be nice is all. ”

Father Kento remains silent as he listens to both of your footsteps exit the church but not before Gojo stops at the doors, his cheerful voice taking on a dangerous edge.

“Heh, you know, not everyone in this town is as pious as you Father. Sheriff Fushiguro has never been one to turn down a stack of bills but I’m sure tonight he would enjoy sharing in Y/N’s creampie if you don’t.”

Father Kento’s eyes open to flash red with fury.

Having received a satisfactory enough reaction from the priest, Gojo grins wildly as your own eyes widen in shock at your husband’s words. 

Has Gojo only ever used you to manipulate him alone? 

The thought remains as Father Kento doesn’t miss the pleading gaze directed at him from over your shoulder as you are led out of the church.

Goddammit– He couldn’t let you fall into the brutish clutches of Toji Fushiguro. 

Toji may have been the sheriff but he was well-known for his oafish demeanor and greasy womanizing ways. 

NO! He mustn’t think of you any longer. 

Father Kento needs to clear his mind of you for good with prayer.

Prayer and solitude.

Deep prayer and extensive solitude was what he needed if he ever hoped to rise again to gain God’s favor. He needed to call upon The Lord’s strength one last time to remain at the parish tonight and defy Gojo’s will.

Father Kento couldn’t let the pleasures of flesh continue to manipulate the very fibers of his being in such a way. 

The rosary still in his grasp Father Kento raises his hands close in prayer as a final call for God’s mercy… and then it hits him– wafting off his fingers, overwhelming his senses and igniting every nerve in his being. 

The scent of your cunt. 

The lingering perfume of your sinful drippings spilled on your husband’s hand during mass had been transferred to his own when Gojo shook his hand and held it so firmly.

The bastard. 

The rush hits him hard and he feels dizzy as his ears begin to ring. Vertigo overtakes Father Kento as he holds the offending hand out as if he had been poisoned. 

Leaning back against a wall to gather himself, Father Kento realizes once the manic pounding coursing through his veins begins throbbing in his loins that he’s fated for damnation.

This is the moment he’d always dreaded although ironic with the simple acceptance of it he feels no despair. 

Father Kento’s conviction is finally clear as he is left with a singular truth that rang through his entire soul:

Whatever solace he would know, whatever peace he would have in this life, he would only find with his cock buried in the sweet embrace of your cunt. 

✟

©blkkizzat 2024. do not steal works or gfx, do not translate.

✟ the closing rites: (a/n) hell is hot and it's surely my destination after writing this. i tried to leave it a little ambiguous to whether y/n is actually in-love with nanami or just a sex-crazed slut eager to use him at the request of her husband. i don't have a pt.2 planned just fyi as this is meant to be a oneshot. although i do need to write more nanami so i will take requests for him! but fair warning i am very slow i apologize.

also shout out to the amazing art i used for the gfx ✟ art by mishwell

✟ REBLOG to be unburdened of your sins by Father Nanami but likes and comments are also appreciated!

upcoming: the nursery (yakuza!toji), please teach me! (ceo!gojo), request: teasing choso (college au), request: sukuna x blkreader, [none in any order as im at the mercy of my adhd lol]

#♋︎kizzatcooks #♋︎kizzatcookedthat #jjk x reader #jjk smut #jjk x reader smut #jujutsu kaisen x reader #jujutsu kaisen x reader smut #nanami x reader #nanami smut #nanami x reader smut #gojo smut #gojo satoru smut #kento nanami smut #gojou satoru x reader #gojo x reader #jujutsu kaisen smut #nanami kento smut #jjk fanfic #gojo satoru #jjk fanfiction #nanami fanfiction #nanami x y/n #jujutsu kaisen #nanami kento #nanami fanfic #jjk nanami #priest kink #priest au #priest nanami #jjk gojo

[selfishdoll]

❛ ..SO, SO MUCH.❜

I need you bad I can't take this pain | Boy I'm 'bout to go insane ⁺ 𓂋 𓈒 ♡ NEED U BAD.

ཐིཋྀ ⊹ 𓈒 SUMMARY.

you thought you were fine breaking up with your highschool sweetheart & avoiding him for a year. when, in actuality, you were not.

ཐིཋྀ ⊹ 𓈒 CONTENT WARNING.

angst (tiny amount), jaded reader (at first) exes to lovers, y’all were highschool sweethearts fr, tattoo artist! choso & college student reader (both 21+), “i missed you” type sex, choso being a sweetheart & very understanding, reconciling, multiple orgasms, oral sex (fem receiving ofc he’s a munch), soft dom choso, pet names & praise, excuse the amount of plot i got carried away, etc.

ཐིཋྀ ⊹ 𓈒 NOTE.

jasmine sullivan & yoci carrying most of my plot ideas. this took way too long omg. also, excuse any typos or grammar mistakes as this wasn’t proofread. also this is 4k+ words so yeah.

How did relationships work? How did love work? Relinquishing a part of yourself to someone, expecting them to cherish and take care of it; doing the same for them. It was something you found silly, maybe even a little arrogant. You’ve seen too many woman in your life give a part— even their entire selves to their partners, only for the relationship to fall apart. Cheating, lies, simply drifting away from one another; so many excuses, so many reasons on why you avoided relationships like the plague.

Until you met him, Kamo Choso.

You remember clearly as if it was yesterday. Freshman year, he was seated in the back of your shared English class. Boredly looking ahead as if he didn’t want to be there. He looked rugged, maybe even a little depressed; overall, you didn’t see yourself becoming friends.. let alone lovers.

Oh, how wrong you were.

Choso had somehow slipped into your life through your beloved shared friend Yuki Tsukumo. From then on things fell into place. You don’t know when or why you started falling for him.

Was it because he was so caring to his younger brother Yuji? Or maybe how sweet he was to you? Always asking if you were okay, always by your side when things got tough, always encouraging you..

You fell, and you fell hard. But Choso fell much harder.

To him, you were perfection. Carefully crafted with zero flaws. He wanted to get on his knees and thank your mother personally for creating you. That’s how much you meant to him.

The moment these thoughts entered his mind he acted fast, declaring his feelings for you sophomore year of highschool. Not even letting himself linger for a month. He wanted, no, needed you as his. And to his happiness, you returned the feelings. From that day, highschool was nothing more then a bliss-filled blur.

You two became known for your loving relationship, many believing you two would marry after highschool. It was silly, you two were teenagers— yet the thought did make you smile. Everything was just.. perfect. There was nothing more you could ask for.

Until, talk of the future entered the bond you two had.

You wanted to become a nurse, planning to attend a college that had an excellent reputation for its program. While Choso wished to become a tattoo artist in your city. One wanted to stay, and one wanted to go. Choso declared he could handle a long-distance relationship, but you couldn’t. As selfish as it was, you simply couldn’t bare the thought of being away from him for so long. What if he strayed? What if you did? You couldn’t bare it at all— something you tearfully confessed to him the week before you moved onto campus.

You vividly remember the scene, it burned into your mind with no chance of escaping. How Choso stood silently, patiently; listening to your concerns and worries— expressionless when you apologized and ended the relationship. And what did he do? He approached you, carefully wiping away your tears as he’s done for you before.

“Take care of yourself.. okay?” He spoke, taking your cheek in a gentle grasp and leaning down; kissing your forehead— sealing the deal.

That chapter in your life was over. You weren’t with Choso anymore, mind focused on your studies and nothing more. A relationship would drag you down anyway.. you didn’t need him.. you didn’t miss him.

“Shit..” You hissed softly, quickly pulling the wand away from your eye, blinking rapidly. It was your own fault; rushing to put mascara on. You should have better time management skills given you were in college and all— but no. Here you were, fighting against time while attempting to finish getting yourself ready for a block party. You hadn’t a clue who was throwing it, only told — or more like forced — to attend by Yuki.

You jolted in your seat when a loud honk come from outside your house, moving around your vanity to peer outside; spotting Yuki’s familiar car. You breathed softly, standing from your chair and fixing your attire. You wore a cute white ring halter top, along with blue jean shorts and black wedge sandals. Gathering your phone, keys, and purse; the gold chain around your ankle jingled as you exited your bedroom and soon house, locking the door behind you.

Yuki rolled down her window, grinning at you as you walked down your driveway. “Uber for (Y/N)?”

You playfully rolled your eyes at her shenanigans, opening the passenger side door and entering, shutting it behind you. You buckled up after placing your things down, sinking into the chair. “Thanks for picking me up.”

“No problem, I just wanted to see your face firsthand when I tell you Choso would be there.” The words came out of her so nonchalantly, messing with her radio for a moment all while you stared at her blankly.

You reached for your door, but the woman was much faster; locking and starting up the car. You whipped around to glare at her, “Tsukumo! You told me he would be working.”

“Guess the client cancelled..” She mused, taking the car out of park and beginning to drive away from your house. Yuki side glanced, catching your annoyed expression which caused her to sigh, rolling her eyes. “Look, there’s gonna be quite a few people there— maybe you two won’t speak.” She shrugged, raising her eyebrows in hopes you would relax. You only sucked your teeth, leaning into the car door.

An entire year, you’ve two been away from each other. Contact dwindling into nothing after the second month of college. You two were simply busy leading different lives, you told yourself.

But again, it didn’t matter it’s not like you, missed him anyways.

The rest of the car ride was filled with random radio music and brief chatter, Yuki catching you up on things. You had avoided coming back for any holidays, knowing it would be too much for you. Luckily, she was more than happy to tell you about all the dirt she had on your shared friends.

She soon slowed infront of an unfamiliar house, putting the car into park and soon shutting it off. You glanced around, feeling your anxiety lift when you realized you didn’t see Choso’s car. Good, you could somehow melt into the crowd without him noticing you.

Silently you grabbed your phone deciding to leave your purse and charger in the glove compartment, you exited the car and shut the door behind you. Following Yuki up the driveway, porch, and into the house; music quickly overtook you, with the sweet smell of the grill and alcohol. Some people were resting in the living room or crowding the dining room table, but most were in the backyard playing football, or simply shooting the shit.

You glanced around, eyes twinkling at the familiar faces and waltzing up to them. Laughter and hugs ensued, catching up on things given you haven’t seen each other in about a year.

Your arm was locked around Shoko’s waist, talking about nonsense whilst watching Gojo and Geto play beer pong. Or more like Gojo mocking his best friend for missing such an easy shot.

It was nice seeing everyone like this, the stress of seeing your highschool sweetheart leaving rather quickly. For now you were swept away in nostalgia, enjoying being around the people you cared for.

A cup in hand, you recalled the time you walked in on your dorm mate having sex, cheeks burning from the permanent smile etched onto your features. One that faltered the moment excited voices called out to the pink-haired male entering the backyard.

“You’re finally here, Yuji!” Nobara grinned at her close friend, walking over to him; Megumi close behind. The young man apologized, talking about traffic or what not. You weren’t too concerned about that, given your eyes settled on the person walking in behind him.

Anxiety spilled into you, heart thumping against your chest as you took him in, your ex— Kamo Choso. Nothing much had changed about him, still as rugged and handsome as ever; dressed in a simple black compression shirt and baggy pants. It seemed he decided to forgo his usual hairstyle, the black tresses resting on his shoulders in a messy fashion. One that suited him perfectly.

Your breath hitched, watching his eyes zone in on your instantly. You didn’t wait for a reaction, quickly turning away and busying yourself with your phone. Your eyes did lift a little however when the man passed you, the familiar cologne burning your nostrils and causing your stomach to stir. Before you could even think you were lifting yourself from the chair and waltzing back into the house.

Luckily no one noticed or either failed to comment on your disappearance.

You found yourself heading over to the kitchen, grasping ahold of the silver fridge door and opening it; eyes scanning for some water. You murmured to yourself while continuing to look, attempting to ignore the harsh beating of your heart. You sighed the moment you finally found one, grasping it from its place on the shelf and standing up, closing the door.

Taking the cap off you lifted the bottle to your lipgloss stained lips, taking a few sips whilst leaning against the counter— relishing in the cold beverage. Your eyes closed in thought, attempting to map out a perfect plan on how to avoid Choso.

The backyard was a medium size, yet he was bound to be around Yuji. So, as long as you avoided him, Nobara, and Megumi— you could avoid Choso too! It was foolproof and perfect, nearly bringing a smile to your face.

Leaning up you pulled the bottle from your lips, twisting the cap back on and lifting yourself from the counter, turning and freezing. Breaching the threshold of the kitchen was Choso in all his glory, face turning from talking to someone to stare in front of him, eyes landing on you.

A brief silence entered the kitchen, simply taking the other in. Finally, Choso was the first to speak; “Hey, (Y/N).”

“Hey..” You spoke, annoyed by how small you sounded. You watched as he opened the fridge, grabbing a water bottle and shutting it closed. The man leaned against the wall beside the kitchen’s opening, opening the bottle.

You glanced around, noticing there were no many exits. You were trapped.

“How’s college?”

“Huh—“ Your head snapped back to the man, spotting his raised eyebrows, awaiting your answer. You nervously licked your lips, leaning back against the counter. “It’s uh.. been good. Classes are a little hard but, ya know.” You shrugged, feeling a heat crawl from your cheeks to the back of your ears. You dragged your gaze from the ground to him, “How’s tattooing? I heard you got your own booth, congrats.”

Choso nodded slowly, a lazy smile pulling his lips. “Yeah, thanks.” He mused softly, placing the cap back onto his water bottle. “Clientele has been good. Been going to tattoo parties and special events.. and things.”

“That’s good.” You forced a little smile, gaze faltering the moment his eyes landed on you. You felt the way they carried down your form, a familar gaze, one that always made you feel far too warm.

Another silence entered the room, both of you refusing to speak.. or leave. You told yourself time and time again you hadn’t missed Choso, that you were done; stuck on the path you’ve chosen. Yet here you were, anxiously waiting for something, anything to happen. You just.. couldn’t let go.

You gripped the bottle you held, eyes drifting back to him, zoning in on the bracelet he wore. It had red and black beads, ones all to familar to you. Starboy, was the words etched onto seven of them. You knew this, given you had your own pink and white charm bracelet labeled Stargirl.

“You still wear that?” The words left you before you could think, Choso blinking from his thoughts and glancing at his wrist. The man breathed softly, nodding soon after. “Yeah. I do.”

“Why?”

Choso went silent, leaning his head back against the wall as his eyes turned up to the ceiling. Finally he shrugged, “I don’t know.” He spoke lowly, causing you to bite your lip. Feelings you had pushed to the back of your mind began to flood within you, flashes of memories you had kept locked away following after.

You turned, rapidly blinking to eliminate the tears threatening to tread down your face. You were kidding yourself for months, thinking you hadn’t missed him. Thinking you were better then the woman in your life, able to cut a man off without a second thought. Yet your heart betrayed you in the most painful way, wanting nothing more to leap into his arms and cry.

His cologne became stronger, a gentle, familiar hand hesitantly being placed onto the one that held your bottle. Your eyes drifted to his face, spotting the concerned look he wore. That was enough for you, tears spilling and traveling down your dark brown cheeks, mouth opening but unable to speak.

But Choso knew what you wanted to say, knew how you felt. The man gently grabbed the bottle from your hand, placing it off to the side whilst his arm wrapped around your waist, pulling you into his chest. He ignored the wet feeling that tainted his shirt, resting his chin onto your head all while continuing to hold you. Choso breathed as your shaky hands reached around, grasping his shirt as your buried your face deeper into his chest.

“I’m so sorry Choso..” You managed to whimper out, sniffling shortly after. The words escaped you again, delving into a soft mantra that caused the man to pull you even closer, softly shushing and soothing you. You stood there in his arms, feeling every bit of resolve melt away.

You missed Choso so much, it hurt. The pain rendering your whole body limp, using him for stability.

It took a moment to calm yourself down, soon pulling away, warming as the man reached over to wipe your tears. Just like he did a year ago and so many years prior.

“Why are you apologizing?.. You don’t have to—“

“I didn’t compromise. I was so stuck on myself, running at the first sign of conflict.” You spoke softly, leaning into his palm the moment held your cheek. “I want to try again.. I want to be with you again, Choso. You don’t know how much I missed you.”

The words had barely left you before his lips were covering your own, taking your breath away easily. The familiar, wonderful feeling took over your mind, hands sliding up to wrap around his neck; fingers curling into his messy hair. The moment his tongue swiped across your bottom lip you were parting them, pressing your body into him as a needy sigh escaped you. His hands traveled to the underside of your thighs, lifting you up and placing you on the counter— all while continuing the kiss.

Your legs opened wide, locking around him the moment he stepped between them. The kiss deepened, his hands resting on your ass as soft moans and hisses entering the atmosphere. Sooner then you hoped the kiss ended, pulling away as soft pants fanned on each other’s skin.

“I missed you too.. so, so much.” Choso murmured softly, gripping your plush form as if you would disappear in thin air. No other words followed, the man capturing your lips with such intensity you were tugging at his tresses. Languidly moving his lips, leaving you breathless, threatening to devour you. Your legs tightened around his form, feeling hot beneath your clothes.

His name fell from your lips in a soft whimper, pulling back and resting your head against the cabinet— gasping the moment his lips attached to your neck. Your eyebrows knitted close together, biting your lip as his teeth gently grazed your skin. “Choso, Choso.. not here— we can’t..”

While his lips didn’t stop he listened to your warning, sliding his hands underneath you and lifting you off the counter. You tightened your arms around his neck, face hot with embarrassment as he walked you from the kitchen and towards the back of the house— everyone luckily none the wiser given they were all in the backyard now.

Moving towards a random bedroom he opened the door, shutting and locking it behind him. Waltzing over to the bed he sat down, placing in you in his lap all while his lips continued to press gentle kisses against your neck, collarbone, and throat. Your hands traveled, finding the edge of his shirt and tugging on it, feeling his hands fall from your body to his shirt— peeling it off for you. Tracing his skin, feeling his sculpted sink in the moment your feathery touches reached low— gasped as Choso gently bit your neck, pushing to lay you down on the soft blankets.

“Missed this.. missed your touch, smell, how you taste..” His words drifted, catching onto the the edge of your shirt and slowly pulling off your body. Choso breathed, taking in your naked chest, leaning down. The cool, silver chain he wore tickled your skin as his lips ghosted your chest, a warm hand grabbing your breast to gently squeeze.

You gasped as his tongue glided across your areola and slowly hardening nipple, feeling his free hand flicking the button on your shorts, entering them shortly after. Choso began to suck on your hardened bud, all while his fingers breached your panties, two fingers slowly circling your clit. Your legs rose, hips rising into his touch as your head leaned back against the mattress. Soft breaths of pleasure escaped you, gripping his hair as your eyes were pinched closed.

“You missed this, pretty girl? Missed how easily I could drive you crazy from just my fingers?..” He questioned softly, fingers lowering to push into you, hissing at the way your walls clung to his digits all while his thumb busied itself, rubbing tight circles onto your hard button.

You nodded, clinging onto him as his fingers thrusted and scissored inside of you. “Yes.. fuck— yes.. Missed this so much, Choso.” You gasped, whimpers escaping you as another finger came to stretch you. Wet muffled squelches carried with each thrust and curl into your pussy, bruised lips parted as melodic moans escaped you.

The man hummed softly in enjoyment, leaning down to capture your lips in a sweet kiss. Sweeter, softer then the way he was ruining you with his fingers, pushing against your gummy walls affectively leading you closer and closer to your orgasm. You whimpered in his mouth, nails dragging from his hair to his arm, feeling the muscles tense with each movement of his hand.

You legs tightened around him, pulling back to gasp, throwing a hand over your mouth the moment you came— muffling the moan that escaped you. Your mess soiled his fingers and your panties, legs shaking as you felt him slowly withdraw his fingers. You breathed into your palm, barely registering his hands latching onto your shorts and peeling them off your body, panties following.

There, his hands slid to the inside of your thighs, pushing them open to reveal the price between them. Choso moaned softly from the sight, hands rising to place his thumbs onto your soaked folds, spreading them. “So messy, princess.” The man teased softly, reaching to press his thumb against your sensitive clit, grinning at the way you whined.

“Choso, please..” You breathed, watching as his body lowered, breath hitching the moment his cool breath fanned across your wet cunt. You whimpered as his thick tongue dragged a stripe up to your clit, the tip circling the button. Your legs threatened to close, causing the man to pull you closer, legs stretched out and resting on his shoulders. Your fingers curled into his hair, crying out the moment his lips wrapped around your clit, sucking and running the flat of his tongue against it.

The man pulled back for a moment, hands sliding under your ass and gripping the warm globes, lifting you a little just to smother himself in your pussy. His tongue moved wickedly, gliding up and down your slit before dipping into your warm entrance, thrusting and curling against your walls.

Your fingers clung to his hair, free hand placed against your mouth as you bit your palm, covering the desperate moans that escaped you. Your hips moved, grinding into his face as little tears built within your eyes. Slurping and lapping, enjoying every single drop that dripped from your pussy, moans escaping him. His hips ground into the blankets, chasing your orgasm with such intensity.

Your stomach clenched, arching up off the bed as a muffled swear escaped you, creaming all over his face, feeling his hands tightened as he licked you clean. Your limp body fell back against the blankets, breathing heavily as your legs shook. Soon enough he released you, rising from his spot between your legs and dragging his hands from your ass to your thighs, soothing the warm flesh.

Pushing forward he leaned over your body, hand carrying to your throat and gently grabbing it, pressing his wet lips against your own; you softly moaning at your taste. Slowly, the two of you continued to kiss, his other hand drifting to his sweats to push down his body, boxers following.

Choso pulled away, placing his forehead against your own, sliding his cock between your slit— rubbing against you slowly. Your fingers locked around his wrist, desperate pleas escaping you as your hips rose, searching for more. The man gave a breathy chuckle, smoothing his thumb against your throat. “Needy aren’t we?” The man mused, leaning to kiss between your eyes, hearing you whine.

“Need you, Choso..”

“You need me so bad, put it in yourself.” The man spoke, watching you bashfully blink at him, grinning as you attempted to shy away from his gaze. His hand rose, grabbing your wrist and carrying it between the two of you. Your much smaller hand wrapped around his cock, a hiss escaping his lips from the touch. “Go on, princess..” Choso breathed, gripping the sheets beside him as your hips rose, adjusting to line him up with your entrance before slowly sinking inside.

You never got accustomed to how Choso stretched you— not the first time and definitely not now. Your lips parted, soft moans escaping you as your hips continued to slowly rise. A choked cry escaped you however the moment he flicked his hips forward, burying himself deep inside. “Ch—choso! You..” You whimpered, walls pulsing around his heavy length, feeling him kiss your cheeks.

“Guess I’m just as needy as you baby.” Choso spoke, lip twitching into a subtle smirk. He rose, releasing your throat and resting on his hutches. Hands found the back of your knees, a steady grip as he slowly pushed them down to your chest, watching you breath sharply. Pulling his hips back until the tip was inside, Choso thrusted forward, taking in the way your body jumped and the prettiest moan escaped you.

His rhythm stared quickly, hips snapping back and forth, reaching deep inside; pushing against a spot that caused you to see stars. Your fingers balled up the sheets underneath you, moans escaping you. You had long forgotten the party going on outside, long forgotten the fact you two were separated for an entire year— your mind only focused on how his cock so easily ruined you, toes curling and anklet jingling with each thrust.

The man leaned down, folding you even more as he pressed a hand against the bed, the other curling in your hair, lifting you into a messy kiss. Tongues curling, teeth bumping into each other, eating up the other’s moans as pleasure consumed you. His chain tickled your heated skin, dragging across each time he rutted into you.

“Fuck..” Choso gasped, pulling back to breath, hand moving to gently grabbing your cheeks. “Keep your eyes right here, princess.. that’s it.. look so pretty like this.” He spoke, feeling you clench with each praise that left his mouth.

You felt so damn good, hugging him close; sucking him in each time he pulled back. Your arousal dripped down his length, a sticky ring forming at the base of his cock. Just when your hand rose to cover your mouth again, Choso was snatching your wrist, pressing it against the bed.

“No, no— waited far too fucking long to have you covering your mouth.” He hissed harshly, intertwining your fingers as he buried himself deeper, hitting your cervix.

The pain was quickly washed away with pleasure, eyes rolling to the back of your head as you came around his cock— a high pitched cry escaping your throat. Tears trickled down your cheeks, other hand falling to his waist to push, and whine; the overstimulation becoming too much.

All for Choso to simply shake his head, pace quickening as he drilled you into the bed. “Know you got another in you.. come on (Y/N).”

You whimpered, head pressed into the blankets as sobs escaped you. “Cho—Choso! Hah.. Can..can’t think, fuck!”

“Then don’t.” The man chuckled in a breathy tone, leaning close as his lips ghosted your lips. “Let me fuck everything out of your mind except for how good I’m making you feel..” A groan escaped him shortly after, eyes glossing over as he felt himself getting close.

Thrusts became desperate, the two of you dissolving into pathetic fits of moans and whines, hands moving across the other’s skin to grip and mark up. Just when you felt your mind going blank you shook, convulsing as you came all over his cock again.

Choso was close behind, burying himself deep and coming; eyes pinched close as he gripped you tightly. His hips stilled, heavy pants escaping the two of you.

The man pulled out shortly after, rolling off your body and falling to your side. Choso didn’t leave you alone long, reaching for your waist and pulling you into his side, turning to place a feverish kiss to his forehead.

A blissful silence covered the silence, simply enjoying the other’s company and warm bodies. Soon though, you rose up slowly, ignoring the aching of your body as your hand found his cheek. “I love you, Choso.”

He smiled at you, thumb caressing your skin as he kissed you gently— mumbling the same on your lips. Moments passed before you two pulled away, you snuggling in his neck arm strewn across his body.

Until.. you blinked, glancing around the room. “Wait.. whose room is this?”

“It’s a guest room.” He murmured back, chuckling softly after. “Gojo might be a little pissed if he finds out about this.”

You shook your head a little, sighing softly. “Choso..”

#mani writes ━━ ★ #black!reader #jjk x black reader #jjk smut #jjk x fem!reader #mdni #choso kamo x black reader #choso kamo x y/n #choso kamo x you #choso kamo smut #choso kamo x reader #choso x female reader #choso x you #kamo choso #choso x reader #choso smut #choso x black! fem! reader #choso x chubby reader #choso x curvy reader

[chuluoyi]

Could you do a brother’s best friend!Megumi x reader?

like her brother being overprotective, but being oblivious of his best friend’s crush on her sister?

(not the) best kept secret

- fushiguro megumi x reader

cool, brooding and handsome. your crush on your brother's best friend is a secret you only keep to yourself. little do you know, he too feels the same. and so, your love story—and the trials and tribulations that come with it—begins.

genre/warnings: college au, reader being yuji's little sister and him and your family being protective, fluff, mutual pining, tiny weeny angst if you squint? with happy ending ofc!

notes: awww anon, this ask is so cute and so hidden love-coded! did you watch hidden love too? because this piece draws inspiration from that ehe. and uh it turned out longer than i expected and i haven't proofread it but pls enjoy!

series masterlist | oneshot masterlist

You have had a crush on your brother’s best friend, Megumi, for a while now.

Actually, scratch that. For a long time now, since you were in middle school, in fact.

In your eyes, he was really cool. He was reserved and not very talkative, which was a stark contrast to your brother Yuji, who could talk a mile a minute every day. It always baffled you why the two could be bosom friends.

And he treated you well. Megumi may have bonked Yuji’s head at any given chance, but with you, he was different. He was gentler, kinder, and overall just considerate. Sometimes he would even pick you up in your brother’s place, and your heart would beat out of your chest from sheer giddiness.

Little did you know, he too didn’t quite see you as a mere sister of his friend.

It started with head pats. You heart would flutter and he would be more conscious of his actions. Yuji had furrowed an righteous eyebrow at the sight.

“Oi, Fushiguro, that’s some favoritism there!” he whined. “I helped you with homework and what did I get—”

“Shut up, Itadori.”

And then the text messages. You didn’t know how or why you ended up texting him on daily basis. He was the one who texted you first a few months ago, having obtained your number from a mutual friend in your circle to ask about the best gift for Yuji’s birthday. And somehow up until now, you found yourselves telling him how your day went, and he the same.

you: i've just finished my class today. so tired megumi: oh? mine is still in session. quite boring you: i see. well, ganbatte!

Those little interactions made your day, and for now, you were quite satisfied with them. But when your phone buzzed once again, signaling a new text, you couldn't resist the urge to swiftly open the messaging app to expect the expected.

megumi: wanna grab lunch later?

It was so incredibly childish, but you felt like winning.

Lunch invitations were often. You spent the whole duration of lunch with him almost every day at this point. The two of you talked about many mundane things, and he would have this small smile whenever you griped about your hard tests or annoying classmates.

Head pats. Texts. Lunches.

And then there was Nobara.

Now, don't get me wrong. You adored her—she was a fun person, pretty and you even looked up to her as your role model at some point. If Yuji somehow ended up with her, you were sure to give them 200% of your blessings.

But seeing her with Megumi was another story. Sometimes you envied your brother's close knit group of three. They had been friends since middle school, and it was granted that Nobara would spend a whole load of time with both your brother and Megumi. With Yuji, she was harsher and didn't take him seriously, but you couldn't deny what your peers had been whispering and what you yourself found very plausible—she and Megumi would make a fine match.

It wasn't your intention at all, but ever since you saw him and Nobara at the toy shop together, pulling for popular merchandises in gacha box, you started losing confidence in yourself and inadvertently put this distance between you and him.

At first it was subtle, Megumi didn't even realize it. But when your replies were few and far in between, he decided it was time to address the problem.

"You don't answer my texts," he stated one day, barely catching you at campus during the lunchtime. Now that he thought about it, you kept denying his lunch invitations too. "Are you avoiding me?"

"I, um," you stuttered. You didn't anticipate running into him, to be honest, and so you were at loss of words. "It isn't like that..."

Megumi figured that he had done something to make you feel like you should avoid him, but he didn't want the two of you to be in this awkward situation any longer, so he led you away from the crowd to your usual place of hanging out after lunch—the rooftop.

"Have I done something?" he asked warily. "It's okay, you can tell me."

"No, Megumi, I—"

"I don't want us to be like—this," Megumi said, his face contorting with a deep frown. "I don't like it at all."

Typically, he regarded friendships as a pain, but not with you. Not with the girl he had been pining over for who knows how long now.

Yuji's sister. He had to remind himself of that fact so many times and yet his heart didn't seem to get it. You were his best friend's dearest sister, and yet he fell for you regardless. If Yuji knew, he would definitely had some opinions on this.

And so for the last few months, he kept it hidden under his sleeves. He approached you, befriended you, took you out on lunch dates—acting on his growing feelings for you and yet he didn't have the courage to confess still.

But enough was enough. If not confessing meant losing you altogether, then he was willing to take the risk. At the very least, if you did reject him, he would have gone down with a fight.

"Y/N, I don't know if you're already aware of this or not, but..." he gulped. Apparently this wasn't as easy as he thought, especially when you met his gaze with your cutely confused ones.

"I have feelings for you. I... like you, quite much."

His voice was clear, without any hint of doubt. You were taken aback and widened your eyes out of surprise.

"You do...?" you shyly asked him back, finding it hard to believe. Fushiguro Megumi, the boy you've been crushing on since you were 15, when you were only able to hide behind Yuji and saw him from afar. The boy who once was indifferent to you, was now confessing his feelings for you? He liked you back in the same way you liked him?

"I do," he replied with clarity, and then a smile. That small smile that always made your insides do somersaults. "I want to ask you out for a while now, but since well... you know... out of consideration for your brother, I felt like I couldn't simply whisk you away."

To his surprise, you laughed, and Megumi found himself breathless. The way you laugh was so mesmerizing in his eyes, reminding him why he could fall in love with you in the first place.

"I like you too, Megumi."

And that was all he needed. Apparently that confirmation was enough to forget that you were the sister of his long-time friend, and that it was fine even if you were. After all, since when was it a crime to romance your best friend's sister?

Still, you two decided to keep it under the wraps first. Springing this on Yuji would startle him, you reasoned, and he agreed. It was more convenient this way anyways.

Your relationship with Megumi was a happy one. He was curt, but never failed to look out for you. He remembered things you liked, and would take you out on places you wanted to go. Arguments were there—granted, sometimes he was just too stubborn, so you may have a clash of opinions—but in the end, the two of you always managed to work it out.

But there was always something melancholic in Megumi that you weren't sure you could touch at all. Perhaps it was due to his upbringing—his incomplete family. You tried to fill that gap, giving him many fun and happy memories, hoping it would replace his sad ones. He was grateful for that.

Nonetheless, the reality persisted that your brother, Yuji, remained completely oblivious to all of this. Yuji still thought that you were his innocent younger sister, and Megumi was his best bro. Sometimes you felt bad to do all this behind his back, and yet you made no move to rectify it.

“Hey, let’s ask Fushiguro to join too!” Yuji would say, and you would agree. And then, in front of him, you and Megumi would refrain from being too friendly, and he would be none the wiser.

All things have karma. You have built your karma too, for deceiving your kind and sweet brother.

"Fushiguro! How could you?!"

When Yuji's fist collided with his jaw, honestly Megumi had given up on fighting back, because one, there was no chance of winning against him, and two, your scream pierced the air, filled with worry for him.

You two just had to be found out in the worst way possible—while making out. It was wrong in so many levels in the first place. Why and how did you even initiate making out in your house that you shared with your brother?

"It could've been anyone," Yuji fumed with anger, his teeth clenching. "Anyone at all! And yet it has to be Y/N—my own sister! Fushiguro, have you ever considered the magnitude of betrayal this is to me?"

"Yuji! Please stop!" you tried to intervene. "He's not at wrong—it was me who—"

"No, you don't get any say in this!" for the first time, you saw your kind brother got angry and it made you quiver in fear. Yuji had never been angry, not to you. "You too, Y/N. How could do this behind my back? The least you could do is telling me!"

"I'm an adult!" you stressed, now irritated at this display of protectiveness from him. "I can date whoever I want and you can't just punch the man who happens to be my boyfriend!"

Honestly, if asked, Yuji wasn’t like 100% against your relationship with Megumi. He and Megumi practically grew up together, he knew the best and worst parts of him, and overall he still considered him decent.

But what made it hurt was that the two of you decided to leave him out. It made him doubt everything he knew about his best friend. How could he trust his sister to someone he found hard to trust?

He turned to Megumi, who was still slumped on the floors of his garage. “No. If he really likes you that much, then he will willingly accept this.”

Megumi understood, if his own sister was dating… let’s say, someone like Gojo, whom he trusted but not at the same time, he too would definitely beat the crap out of him.

And so he willingly endured all the blows. Yuji had to let off steam, and this pain was worth everything if it meant he would give his blessing for you.

Yuji was taken aback that his friend actually let him do this. When Megumi got thrown one last time and almost passed out, Yuji finally decided that it was the end.

His best friend and his sister… it was almost laughable if he didn’t feel like the biggest fool between the two of you.

He saw how you immediately sauntered towards him with tears in your eyes, muttering several apologies. Yuji wanted to snort, but then Megumi took a hold of your hand that was on his bruised cheek, and smiled, saying that it was okay.

And despite himself, his heart felt warm. Seeing the usual gruff and cold Megumi be this… soft with you seemed to open his eyes to something more.

Looking back, he could’ve had realized it when Megumi started to get touchy with you. He completely missed that the head pats were actually his subtle way of expressing his fondness for you.

Yuji decided to leave you be. At least he had made his point across, and he hated to say it outright, but perhaps, it was okay after all for you to be with him.

Okay didn’t mean you two had obtained his full blessing, though. But another event soon changed his perspective.

“Itadori,” Megumi’s ragged breaths was what he registered first through the sudden phone call. “Please come here—Y/N—she was—”

It was Yuji’s first time to witness pure panic from Megumi. He proceeded to tell him how you had been in pain and then collapsed, and that he had brought you to the hospital.

When Yuji arrived at the hospital, he once again saw how restless his friend was over your wellbeing. He could no longer deny it—the sight moved him.

“Hey, you awake?” Megumi’s face was the first you saw when you awoke at the hospital bed. He looked so concerned, a frown creased deep in his face. “Are you not in pain anymore?”

No, not quite much anymore, you wanted to say, but your throat felt so dry and you only managed to shake your head lightly.

“That’s good,” he let out a relieved sigh, and that was when you notice your brother at the corner of the room, looking at you two with a somewhat exasperated expression, but then he smiled.

Who knew a severe case of appendicitis would lead to Yuji giving his complete approval for you to date his best friend, huh?

But life is nothing if not full of obstacles. The next obstacle you faced after Yuji’s finding out was your parents.

“Look Y/N, we know. Megumi is a good guy,” you mother started. “We've known him for a long time, of course, personality-wise, we have nothing against him.”

You bit your lower lip in frustration. Beside you at the dinner table, Yuji kept his silence, but listened attentively too.

“It’s just… the matters of his family,” your father added, carefully choosing his words.

“His father is never in the picture, is he? And there are also rather unsettling news about him too.” Your mother was always the one being more straightforward.

Both you and Yuji knew it already. As of now, Megumi only had his stepsister, and last you heard, his father was gambling somewhere and then became a convict. Megumi said he had cut ties with him, but there was no such thing as an ex-father. Until forevermore, Fushiguro Toji, a criminal, was his biological father.

“Mom, I know your concern,” Yuji had finally decided to step up, and you were grateful for that. “Fushiguro won’t end up—”

“Yes, we know,” your mother emphasized, letting out a sigh. “But we are your parents, Yuji, Y/N. If there’s even the slightest chance, we worry. We want the best for you. Always.”

You were at a loss.

You were young, and yet you already saw him in your distant future. Being with Megumi felt so right and comfortable. He was your safe space as you were his.

But you also understood where your parents’ concerns came from, or at least tried to. At least until you found out how your father approached Megumi to talk him into thinking your relationship over.

"How could you, Dad?" you asked, aghast. "You're... practically intimidating him into breaking up with me!"

"Y/N, listen—I never meant it like that," your father tried to explain himself, and yet you were already too heartbroken to hear him, and so you shut the door to your room, not giving him any chance.

Why did your relationship suddenly become everyone's business? Why couldn't they just let you be an adult?

Megumi could still hear your father's words rang in his ears.

"Y/N... we raised her with love and care," your father said with a forlorn expression. By all means, Megumi knew that he meant well. "She's always spoiled, my only daughter... Megumi-kun, you must understand, it's not easy for us too."

He knew that his rather colorful past would get in the way one way or another, and he had come to accept it. But it still stung, because of course, he wanted full blessings from the family of the girl he fell in love with.

You were like a ray of sunshine in his dreary life. Like Yuji, your presence had made an impact on him. Your cute smiles, pouts and vulnerability around him... he loved them all.

He would get upset when you looked sad, just as you were now.

"It's really okay... Y/N." He swiftly wiped your tears with his thumb, as you sniffled. "I didn't take it to heart. Your father is just worried about you... I can understand that."

"But still—h-he shouldn't do that," you replied amidst your small sobs. Above all, you didn't want your father to have spooked him. "Megumi... I don't want to break up with you."

And honestly he didn't expect that. You were afraid of him... leaving you?

He, who did everything he could, just to have you to be by his side?

"Sir, I know where you are coming from. As of now, I don't have much. But I can say this with confidence—I... love your daughter very much, and I will do everything in my power to make sure that she is happy."

"Stupid," he huffed, putting a hand on your head, before messing up your hair. And gosh, you were so cute, glaring at him through your lashes.

"I won't. I've told your father that too actually."

"Just give me two years," Megumi added with unwavering voice, staring at your father earnestly. "After graduation, I'm getting my life in order. I'll secure a stable job and do my best. I'm... going to prove it to you, and you can be the judge if I can finally deserve Y/N or not."

He was 16 when he knew you, seeing you as nothing but a little girl too timid to approach him. And he was 19 when he realized that you were everything he wanted in a girl of his dreams.

At one point in his life, Megumi thought it was okay to be alone. But ever since getting to know you, he realized that loving and being loved by you were the greatest happiness of existence.

"Thank you," he muttered afterwards, as you were still starstruck that he apparently had the balls to declare something like that before your father.

"Thank you for giving me so much love. Because of you, I realized that I too deserve to be loved."

You could feel tears glassing your eyes once again. “You are. I’m glad that you finally think so.”

And that was it—your love story. Something that had started when you were 15, and ended ten years later when you were 25, with swearing your love for each other in front of the sacred altar before your closest family and friends, and Megumi by your side.

#fushiguro megumi x reader #jjk x reader #fushiguro megumi x oc #jujutsu kaisen #megumi fushiguro x reader #jujutsu kaisen x reader #fushiguro x reader #megumi x reader #jjk fanfic #jjk imagines #fushiguro megumi fluff #angst #megumi x you #fushiguro megumi x y/n #megumi #fushiguro #jjk #megumi x yn #megumi x y/n #megumi fluff #fushiguro x you #itadori yuji #kugisaki nobara

[babypinkhearts]

know it’s for the better. - g. suguru

pairing: geto suguru + fem!reader, implied gojo satoru + fem!reader

summary: but butterflies cannot see their own beautiful wings, so he’ll gladly worship you quietly.

warnings: canon au, angst (please forgive me ily all), mentions of violence, vulgar language, crude humor, time-jumps, cameos from shoko, megumi, yuji, nobara :3 comfort.

word count: 16.8k

a/n: this fic has been my baby for a month, i’ve poured so much love into it. treat her well <333 loosely inspired by the songs “first love/late spring” by mitski and “waiting room” by phoebe bridgers. there are so many references to so many things in this :) some quotes that i will think about forever. hope you enjoy.

october, 2006.

“nine out of ten times.”

it’s the first sentence you say out loud after minutes of silence, and you’re given a puzzled look. it kinda makes you want to laugh, the confusion etched across his face so foreign that it’s rather intriguing. he’s golden, even under all the darkness. the world makes space for fallen angels.

“nine of ten times… what?”

you resist the urge to thumb that furrow in his brows, the creases looking wrong upon his soft features. you only smile, snuggling closer to him. either the room is magically colder, or suguru forgot to close the window. you give him the benefit of the doubt.

“that i would choose you.”

you’re slurring your words almost, but more from the plain laziness in your movements rather than from genuine exhaustion. suguru hums, fingers tapping along your arm. it may be around four in the morning, but you couldn’t sleep.

the both of you hadn’t been able to for a while.

not since riko, not since toji, and definitely not since the new scar trailing across your stomach. shoko hadn’t been able to make the repair seamless.

you didn’t really mind. a lot of things seemed pointless nowadays.

“and the other time?”

your eyes linger on the strand of hair that always falls imperfectly on his face. a little crack in his flawlessness, though you’re not sure how grand that observation actually is.

you sit up a bit, propping your head with your arm as you look down at his pretty brown eyes. narrow, as they currently are, but still evidently alluring.

“well, i think it’s okay to be selfish sometimes.” you reason, voice soft. sometimes the dependency you had with suguru worried you. waves can crash, but the water itself remains. you think you’ll always be bound to him. his, forever. and yet you say, “i’d choose myself. just for a bit of sanity.”

it’s meant to be lighthearted, but the silence that falls afterwards kills any tone of playfulness that statement might have held.

you wish you had been a little more greedy.

•••

september, 2007.

emotions were complicated things.

it’s complicated to process the bullet you watch fly through a child’s head. it’s complicated to process your near-death experience. it’s complicated to process process the news of your classmate’s death. it’s complicated to process how it’s expected for you to go back to normal. it’s complicated to process everything.

so you curl up further, and hope that the news you’re hearing now is only a nightmare. because again, it’s too complicated to process.

“he killed them.”

and with the way satoru says it, repeats it, you think he wants you to sit up and hug him. be vulnerable, because god knows it’s been so long since you have.

but you lay there, back in the bed that you used to sometimes share with the criminal. the stillness makes satoru’s stomach drop, and he can’t will himself to say it again just for the chance of getting a reaction from you. but how much pain can a heart take? because it felt like yours might give out at any moment.

you didn’t sign up for this.

naively, no, you didn’t sign up for this.

“how many?”

you’re not sure why you ask. any number would have you spiraling, but with the silent refusal satoru gives by not replying immediately, you’re sure the answer would kill you alone.

he knows. he knows the exact number, he’d seen the report.

but he stares at your desolate form, eyes scanning the mess in your room. or, lack of. he hardly saw you get get out of bed these days if it weren’t for missions. the only sign of movement from you were the plushies that used to adorn your bed, now sprawled on the floor. for a second, he wonders if they’re gifted from who he thinks they’re from. but that thought feels stupid the moment he thinks of it, because - yes. of course they were. that man had loved you like his lungs naturally loved air. he loved freely, graceful in the way he cared. about satoru, about you. anyone, really.

so saturo makes a decision, hoping that it alleviates a little bit of the ache that he now concludes he will attempt to shield you from. because he cares about you too much to see you succumb to your own internal wounds. he wants you to be strong, like him. like suguru was. he can’t lose you too.

“i don’t know.” satoru lies, and he hopes that sentence can at least ease your heartbreak. but he feels it just as much. sorrowful, the kind of pain he’s been too familar with for a while now. he frowns when you don’t move.

obstruct from his view, your hands grip your sheets as tight as humanly possible, and you’re sure that you break skin through the fabric. you want to cry, but you can’t. not in front of satoru. not while he’s right there.

because this doesn’t affect you. you didn’t care.

so what? suguru had left you to the wolves. to fend for yourself. he became a monster. it didn’t bother you.

and you try to convince yourself to think the same when satoru sits beside you. you’re still thinking it as his shaking hand places itself on your side.

but you give up when he lays beside you, feeling his grief. and that pain only cements itself further as you begin to quietly sob months worth of misery.

you don’t feel much better after.

•••

march, 2008.

nine out of ten times, you’d like to be given the option to wipe your memory.

the other time would be the ability to travel to the past. it’s hard to decide which could be better, or arguably worse. maybe you could save haibara - tag along on that stupid mission and fight that stupid curse. switch places with him, even. the world seemed a lot duller without him in it. nanami spoke even less than he did before. you couldn’t keep up a conversation with him.

was it irrational to think that you might have been able to kill toji too? he just caught you on an off-day. you’re the reason he killed riko. it’s your fault that a child is dead.

there’s so much to be sad about, you’ve started to confuse those ugly feelings with plain normality. it’s natural to feel like this. you can’t really remember better days. they’ve blurred, causing twisted retroactive interference.

your rock had fled. any form of stability you had crumbled with the weight of your sorrow, and you’re forced to miserably pick yourself back up because you’ve never really been used to being alone. satoru wasn’t really around anymore, and shoko never left her studies. you certainly weren’t abandoned, but, unfortunately, you understood that grief couldn’t just halt time forever.

you’ve mourned so much, it feels silly to still have the same ache.

but how do you even move on? what’s the process like? because you’re almost certain you wouldn’t be able to survive it.

you’ve began to rid any remnants of him in your room; any proof of his existence. clothes, specifically, because they hold on to his scent, and you think if you stop for a moment to actually look at them you might break down again. you see memories in them. times where he’s worn the black t-shirts, or his white button-up. insignificant at first glance, but it’s your life you’re holding on to.

you stuff them into bags as quickly as you can.

if he’s not here, he can’t hurt you.

at least, not anymore than he already had.

you think it’s cruel that you’re stuck with a person’s presence even if they’re not physically there anymore. you’ll always associate this room with him. the world, at that.

and maybe it’s childish that your first response (after the sulking) is to trash his belongings, but you can’t think of anything more rational to do. the universe will move on without him. you can’t be left behind too.

when you’re finished, you’re not sure if the sight of five large trash bags and an emptier room makes you want to sob or hit something. it’s like life has lost it’s color - a new vision, duller than what was deemed humane. torturous.

yet you can’t bring yourself to pick them up and take them out of the room. you’re idle, staring at them like they’re just meant to disappear. you hadn’t realized how much your room consisted of just him.

trash, is what you’re unintentionally calling everything in them. but you don’t think that, never in a million years.

if it were up to you, you’d keep everything exactly where it was, and obliviously continue a cheery facade. but the thing about awareness is that after it’s discovered, you can’t really leave it. it’s branded into your mind, poking at your brain with a stick because it will annoyingly never have the intention to leave you alone.

it’ll sit with you in your darkest hours, and you’re unable to predict when light will shine through.

“dump them.”

you jump, defenses high on alert as you instinctively fall back. almost immediately after, you drop your hands, sighing.

shoko is leaning against the doorway, arms crossed. you’re about to ask her how long she’s been standing there for, but her lingering gaze on your conflicting pile of issues answers your question before you have the chance to.

“i’ll do it for you.” she offers, finally looking up to meet your eyes. they’re a little sunken in, and she looks restless. it’s the first time you’ve seen her in nearly two weeks. she’s ditched the short hair since a few months back, the length sitting comfortably at her chest now.

you dumbly stare, non-respondent on purpose. you don’t want her to do that.

she seems to recognize the discomfort on your face at her suggestion, and you watch as her brows bitterly furrow, a small glare now directed at the bags. but you don’t get much emotion other than that.

“you can’t cling on to this shit. it’s unhealthy.” she softly explains, shaking her head. you wonder if that’s her medical opinion or genuine concern speaking, but you don’t ask her to elaborate. instead, you turn around, taking a seat at the edge of your bed.

you kind of want her to leave.

“what’s healthy, then?” you retort, shrugging. it sounded a bit hypocritical coming from her. shoko had barricaded herself for the past six months, not even offering an ounce of genuine sympathy. in reality, you know it’s because she’s naturally avoidant. she didn’t crave support like you did. she didn’t need it like you had. because shoko has always been independent, never strung up on people. and you envy that more than anything.

“i don’t know.” she answers honestly, pursing her lips. but with one look around your room, and she’s certain it wasn’t this.

hesitantly, lets herself inside, eyes scanning the bareness. if it were any other day, she’d see suguru at your desk, or on your bed. he’d wave, and you would greet her with open arms. everyone knew the two of you were nearly inseparable (if it weren’t for satoru). the room always had a pleasant atmosphere when the two of you were in it. it feels cold and grim now, though. shoko has to fight a shiver.

you observe her, waiting for a joke or two. you’re nearly hoping, because any form of comedic relief had begun to be your craving. you needed an escape from all of this.

but instead, she turns back to you and wordlessly sits beside your tense form. it’s quiet for a bit.

there’s a charm that shines on the top of your desk, catching her eye. it dangles among other souvenirs, and shoko has to avert her eyes when she realizes that they’re all gifts from a certain deceased underclassman.

everything about this room feels like a graveyard.

“satoru comes back today.” shoko suddenly says, letting the first thing she can think of be verbalized. her eyes stay on the wooden floor this time. “he’s been in kyoto for a couple of days.”

you hum, nodding. you didn’t know.

if shoko kept her distance, then it was like satoru had completely faded. you couldn’t even remember the last time he had texted you.

then again, you weren’t sure if you’d even respond.

“i was thinking we could eat dinner together… when he gets back.”

your head perks up. barely.

that sounded familiar. mostly because it had been a routine up until recently. never verbally established, but it was natural for you and shoko to be accompanied by two towering sorcerers as you ate whatever satoru had decided on for the day. he was a picky eater. there’s a bitter taste on your tongue as you realize you’d be missing a member now.

“we can.” you nod, awkwardly kicking your feet back and forth. silence again.

you can feel shoko’s annoyance. how she’s trying to get you to talk, but you’re stupidly stubborn and refuse to. however, she knows you a little too well, and plays the waiting game. because she knows you’re weak when it comes to your heart, and weaker when it comes to the people you love. her included.

it’s not a relief when you finally break. if anything, it’s painful to hear, to watch. and though it’s only one question, it’s so complicated that it feels like you’ve asked her how the universe itself was created. simultaneously, it’s equally as simplistic.

it doesn’t even sound sad. it’s hollow, void of any distinct emotion. you’re staring at the wall.

“shoko…” you don’t pay attention to how she stills and watches you intently. you’re oblivious to the frown on her face, how she leans in just a little closer. and the widening of her eyes as you finish speaking. “how are you… okay?”

you feel particularly pathetic. shoko was so strong. satoru was the strongest. and yet here you were, more fragile than ever. on an alter, you’re a mere viewer from below. simply watching perched gods, basking in all their glory. the difference always evident, never comparable.

and yet shoko stares for a little, dumbfounded.

no, absolutely no one was ‘okay.’ the world was crumbling in front of everyone’s eyes. but you’ve always been a reminiscent person, she supposes. you search for familiarity. it’s harder for you to let go.

“did i tell you that?” she asks, more rhetorically than anything. there’s a teasing tone that her voice holds, but it does little to rid the tension of your question. you slowly shake your head.

“then how do you know that’s true?”

you shrug, fiddling with your fingers. “i don’t know.”

you want to tell her that your thoughts are purely based on toxic comparisons to yourself, but the air feels a little thick already, so you don’t.

“c’mere.”

there is no protest made when she wraps her arms around you, and forces you to fall into your bed with her. the pillows under your heads dip, and you’re enveloped in the softness of your blankets. shoko’s warm, and if you closed your eyes you might mistaken her hold to be like a mother’s affection. evident adoration, just by the touch. you’re derived and soak it up as much as you can, leaning into her.

it reminds you of late nights where you’d have sleepovers and gossip until the sun came up. too tired to train the next day, yaga ordering laps regardless of your visible fatigue. and you’d run with gleeful smiles, energy lifting as you were side-by-side again. an unexplainable friendship one could never truly describe with words, just pure thoughts. it’s sickeningly nostalgic, because you think about the fact that it really had not been that long ago. how quickly things change.

shoko nuzzles her face into your hair affectionately and sighs. she squeezes you tightly. declarative - ‘i’m right here.’ never enough to make up for the lost time and avoidance, but enough for now. because shoko didn’t act like this normally, and for you to see her in such a state meant more than just any regular apology.

“i think you know how to love better than any of us.” she admits, and that sentence alone has you curling a little more into her, your chest suddenly feeling tight. she leans in, and her lips form into a sorrowful smile as she observes you. full of pure understanding. again, a connection that could not be made with words. it feels a little spiritual. she brushes a stray strand of hair away from your face. “that’s why you find it all so painful.”

hesitantly, you offer a sad smile, her words all bittersweet. it makes you laugh a little distastefully, the reality of them hitting you at once. “well, that’s not fair.”

“it’s not.” shoko agrees, nodding. “but it’s a lovely thing.”

you make a face. recently, it’s only brought you suffering. the good bits don’t seem as worth it - as ‘lovely’ as she describes.

you pause, contemplating for a little. and your voice is affirmative, like you’ve never been more sure in your life. you kinda sound like a naive child.

“i don’t want it. take my feelings. i don’t like them.”

it’s true. it’s the biggest truth you’ve ever told with the biggest sincerity. and you know it’s not possible, that you’re stuck like this forever. a soft, easygoing heart that beats for everyone around it. your words make shoko snort - a real genuine laugh. you giggle through watery eyes.

“the world sucks.”

this time, it is a pitying smile that shoko gives you. lop-sided, and hesitant. she feels bad.

her arms leave you, and she opts to instead lay facing you, faces mere inches from one another. you’re both laying on your cheeks, against folded hands. shoko taps your nose.

“you know what i think?”

you hum, sniffing a little as you try to focus on the small amount freckles across her face instead of the overwhelming urge to let some tears fall. it works, for the most part. you count twenty.

“i think the world gives strong feelings to strong people.”

you smile at that.

shoko was something else.

“i’m pretty fucking strong then, aren’t i?” you mumble, tired eyes blinking as you sigh. shoko’s eyes crinkle as she returns the fondness, a hand resting on your cheek.

“definitely.”

and you can only hope she’s right.

there’s nothing that interrupts those sweet moments of tranquillity. where you can act like everything is just a little better, because in all honesty, it was. shoko’s good at making you feel like that.

if you really thought hard enough, this could be just another regular day. you want it to be.

you feel shoko’s finger poke your chest, and she gives you a pointed look. it’s like she could read your mind - subconsciously, as if she had the ability of a third eye.

“it gets easier. every day it gets a little easier. but you gotta do it every day — that’s the hard part.”

she leaves it at that.

you lay together, appreciating each other’s mere presence. and it feels nice. support, like you craved, but words even more. you aren’t able to formulate how much you adore her, but actions speak louder than words, so you shuffle just a tiny bit closer.

you’re not sure how much time passes by.

when shoko stands up, she rids you of her warmth, leaving the cocoon of wonder and comfort she’d so gracefully created for you. yet you feel fine, that isolating shiver now replaced with content. you think you feel a little lighter too.

“be outside by seven. if it’s up to me, we’ll all get sushi. no promises though.”

she’s back to being more standoffish, but still your same shoko. you nod appreciatively, the thankfulness worth the weight of a million tons. your eyes follow her as she walks across the room.

the door shuts, and you’re left alone again.

you can feel your heart beat a little faster, the realization of your commitment to the later plans finally dawning upon you. it would be the first real reunion since then. maybe a chance to talk things out. be levelheaded, get some communal closure.

or, maybe you’d be able to ignore the past and focus on the present. just act like friends eating lunch. because that’s all it was, wasn’t it?

begrudgingly, you force yourself to stand, too aware of the fact that your habits of wasting time in bed have far exceeded a reasonable amount over the past few months. it was time to get better, be better.

your hands grab the first bag.

it’s heavy, as you imagine all the other ones are. but you suppose if you don’t think about what’s in them, it’ll make the process a lot smoother.

you’re nearing the door when you stop.

it’s a small paper, it’s yellow exterior almost blending in with the sunlight escaping through the windows. you inch closer.

and it’s pathetic that the sight of his handwriting on a sticky-note makes you lose your breath. shameful, because how are inanimate objects this damaging?

it’s hung above your desk. by haibara’s gifts, and by notebooks you never really used in this academically-lackluster school.

you stare at it for a while, hand resting over your forehead as you take in every minuscule detail. you let go of the bag.

it’s the last note suguru had ever left you, made a few weeks before his disappearance. before everything went downhill. little poetic phrases that would embed themselves in your mind until death. you’re afraid to look.

it’s neatly written, displayed in purple ink. doodles of clouds and flowers surround the words. he had a habit of leaving them around. you suppose you never caught this one.

there’s a little heart next to his signature, encapsulating just a memory of lost devotion.

‘how strange to dream of you, even when i am awake.’

your hand crumbles the note in a second.

the paper is evidently weak, and when you open your hand back up, the words are still clearly there, haunting you. and you know you don’t have the heart to throw it away. or, realistically - throw anything away.

you fold the note gently, and leave it on your desk. your body yearns to leave, to escape the suffocation of what suddenly felt like walls that were caving in. you slam the door on your way out, bags and all left behind.

you’d definitely prefer to wipe your memory.

•••

april, 2005.

“you’re so annoying.”

satoru grins, standing proudly as you repeatedly attempt to hit him on the head, your touch stopped by his infinity. he’d only recently learned how to control it decently - claiming that he needed to because you had a bad habit of using him as your punching bag.

“you know what though? this is a good thing.” you muse, arms crossing as you finally give up. satoru’s head tilts, and you raise a brow. “no one wants to touch you anyways.”

there’s a dramatic pout that immediately finds itself on his face, and he whines from instinct, letting his guard down for a moment to shove you. you slap his arm before he has a chance to react.

“she’s right.” suguru nods affirmatively, earning a gasp from the white-haired male, and suddenly, suguru is being shoved too. you giggle, briefly making eye contact with him. it’s a little too quick for your preference, but the stolen glance has you holding your breath for a moment.

it’s exhilarating.

suguru is beautiful in a way that is hard to describe. but it’s not from a loss of words; you can speak endlessly about him. he’s everything a person could dream of and more. but it’s little gestures that truly draw you to him. how it seems like he always lingers, attentive and patient no matter what boulders you seem to throw at him. he’ll carry that weight on his shoulders easily, and with the most effortless smile. it’s a gentleness that you weren’t even sure was possible before you met him. he defies all expectations, all normalities.

“oh, i forgot to ask-“ satoru turns to you, raising his brows. sometimes his glasses bothered you. his eyes were freakish, yes, but you also had a conflicting urge to always look at them. “how’d your mission go yesterday?”

you cringe, involuntarily stiffening as you replay the events in your head.

“stupid semi-first grade. i let my guard down for a second and it almost clawed me.” you sighed, rolling your eyes. you fail to notice suguru’s eyes widen. “but we exorcised it right after. i swear i saw nanami shit himself.”

there’s a stark difference in reactions from both boys. while satoru snickers, suguru stays quiet. white and black.

“glad you’re still with us.” satoru beams, ruffling your hair before you have a chance to swat his hand away. “right, suguru?”

all attention flocks towards him, and you and satoru patiently await his response. he’s looking off to the side.

he feels a little childish.

there’s an uncomfortable pit in suguru’s stomach that he can’t shake off, and he swallows thickly, nodding with a dismissive cough. “yeah, glad it went well.”

obliviously, you flash him a thankful smile.

it makes him feel the tiniest bit better.

he wished yaga would pair you two together, or even put you with satoru. an actual backup - not someone below your skill level. haibara and nanami weren’t comparable; they were still new to jujustu. younger, less experienced. he holds a little resentment towards your abilities, and while he knows you’re never sent on missions that are tougher than you can handle, he always has an inkling of worry that lingers uncomfortably. he hates not being around you - not knowing if you’re okay. and he knows you’re a reckless fighter. you brush off the mention of critical injuries and move on, completely unbothered. the burden of stress came so easily when he was around you and satoru.

“you have another one tomorrow, right?”

you hum, nodding as you fiddle with the end of your uniform, sighing softly. “it’s across town i think. not sure who’s coming with me yet - maybe it’ll be shoko if i beg hard enough.”

suguru has to fight a wince. also not an ideal companion. shoko didn’t specialize in combat.

she’d only be actual help if you were wounded, and -

“why not me or satoru?”

he speaks before he thinks, and iternally, he punches himself in the face. he can see satoru stop moving in his peripheral vision. he thinks he sees a smirk. coy, but no words come out.

scoffing, you deadpan. “where’s the practice in that? you guys will kill it before i even get a chance to see it.”

and that’s true, because it’s happened dozens of times before. show-offs.

“we can get kikufuku after!” satoru exclaims, completely disregarding you as you begin to protest rather loudly. “i’ve been craving it. i haven’t had it since last week!”

“wait longer.” you sneer, glaring at him. “i rather go alone.”

now that, suguru would verbally be clearly against, without any hint of shame.

“boo.” satoru deflates, rolling his eyes at you. “that won’t even happen.”

it wouldn’t. you hadn’t earned that trust yet - the absolute certainty that you’d survive if you did a mission alone.

suguru’s glad.

“not yet.” you chirp, and the hopeful smile on your face doesn’t help anything. “but soon enough.”

there’s that unwavering aura you always hold that makes suguru feel a little sick. it’s determination, stubbornness, that follows you and keeps you whole. when you talk like that, words void of any doubt, he knows you mean it. and you’ll accomplish it, because your will for achievement is stronger than your rationality.

but he has you now, right in front of him, so he’ll ease himself of the worry. for now.

“in a million years.” satoru remarks, sticking his tongue out at you, not even bothering to look your way as you hold up a rather unpleasant finger in his direction. playful banter was regular between you two; you fed off of each other’s energy. suguru seemed to be the mediator.

an observer, with eyes particularly always lingering on one certain person.

•••

spring has flowers blossoming again, and you feel inclined to stay out for as long as possible. the confinements of your dorm feels like an obstacle, and it’d be a waste to miss out on the beauty that winter’s absence welcomed.

it’s perfect weather.

the cursed weapon in your hand had begun to feel rather light, your arm adapting to the overpowering weight. you disliked close-range combat, but you were being sent on tougher missions now, so there was no room for complaints. your abilities needed to strengthen.

and it’s frustrating, really. to have to constantly forgo complete confidence and figure out where you’re weakest; you could easily make a list with areas of needed improvement. a lot of your classmates seemed to lack that issue. you suppose what’s worse is that you’re completely aware it wasn’t a competition - but you had convinced yourself that at the least, you needed to stay on their level.

even if that meant working ten times harder, even if that meant exerting yourself past a reasonable amount.

but this routine has gotten you this far, and, sincerely, it hadn’t been too much of a problem to keep up with.

in fact, you could probably do a little more.

“you shouldn’t train so much, you’ll strain yourself.”

your stance falters, though you easily recover within the same second. maybe a little too late, but you tried not to be nit-picky. he was naturally quiet.

“i gotta keep up with everyone somehow.” you quickly grin, trying to calm the visible pants of your labored breathing. it’s futile, and you momentarily turn away, as if embarrassed to look anything but perfectly composed. to look less than him - or anyone, really.

your back is towards him.

suguru can read you perfectly. it’s with ease that’s almost completely overbearing, and some part of him believes that he’s only been put on earth to watch out for you. like it knows that you aren’t the kindest when it comes to yourself.

it’s so natural that he supposes it might be his true purpose.

you only hear him hum from behind you, and suddenly there’s a weight pushing down on your raised weapon, ushering it towards the floor. gentle fingers graze against yours, and you let him grab it from you, albeit with some hesitation. he places it on the floor.

“let’s take a break, yeah?”

he doesn’t even need to coerce you, you’d follow him blindly if he asked. you always do.

and he’s leading you, knowing you’re behind him without having the urge to look back and check. exhaustion lingers, but you’re too entranced by him to focus on the sore ache of your limbs. he’s graceful as he walks.

“we trained this morning.”

you freeze momentarily, looking off to the side with a shrug. it’s not that he sounds hostile - it’s just a bit more monotone than normal. “practice makes perfect.”

suguru makes a noise of acknowledgment, but it sounds a bit absentminded and dull, lacking any understanding. like a huff of annoyance.

“right.”

he shouldn’t be this bitter, this cold, when speaking to you. it’s rough against his tongue, and his entire body, mind and all, is actively telling him to stop. emotions are ugly things, though. it makes people less rational; less aware - say things they may regret.

suguru slows his steps, up until you’re beside him, where you should be. and by a glance at you, he knows he’s gotten too uncharacteristically rigid. you’re looking at him, confusion clouding your head. concern, actually. he sees it now.

“did i do something wrong?”

the meekness in your voice, haunted with worry, clears his senses in a millisecond. his eyes widen. panicked, he feverishly shakes his head.

“no — no. of course not.”

he sees you relax a bit, but you’re still looking questionably at him. your head tilts. “then?”

suguru sighs, swallowing thickly as he stops walking. it’s an enchanting sight, grassy fields just a little off main campus. you see a few flowers.

you follow after him as he sits, greenery cushioning your bodies as you settle. suguru picks at the weeds, his eyes on the floor. he speaks quiet, voice among the gentle breeze as his hair flows in waves. you have the urge to remove his hair-tie and see it fully.

“i just worry about you.”

you don’t even attempt to hide the slight flustered smile that finds itself on your face, body feeling overwhelmingly warm. he’s avoiding eye contact for once. l

it’d be a lie if you claimed you didn’t notice the tension - the smiles, the laughs, the soft-spoken volume of his pure voice. so silky smooth it’d rid you of all your worries in a second. but there’s something so alluring about never saying it out loud. like it’s your little secret the two of you can keep, because adoration itself is something so beautiful it needed to be dragged out for as long as possible. you’ve grown to be a little impatient, though.

you nudge him teasingly.

“don’t. i’m right here.”

and it’s true; suguru sees it as a privilege. to be around your presence, to just talk to you — he worships the ground you walk on, and he’s not sure how to tell you that might be the reason why he worries so much.

instead, he chuckles, head bowing momentarily.

“i wish it were that easy.”

you bring your knees to your chest, giggling lightly.

he’s cute.

undeniably.

“it is.” you urge, dragging out the last syllable as you sway towards him. he meets your eyes. “just trust me like i trust you.”

suguru thinks that you’re sometimes oblivious to the weight of your words. they can be so intimate, and you’ll deliver them like any other sentence. as if you hadn’t just made his stomach churn, and his heart beat a little faster. he trusts you more than a healthy amount. he’d trust you with his life, his future — he’d leave everything in the palms of your hands.

“i do.” he replies, reassuringly. it’s earnest, and you smile. suguru bites the inside of his cheek, and closes his eyes. “it’s everything else that scares me.”

and there’s really nothing you can really do to help that fear, because you know it’s completely reasonable and realistic. tomorrow is never promised, especially with the hectic lives you live. you want to tell him that you have similar thoughts when he and satoru are out for days at a time, no return window strictly placed. that it has you pacing back and forth until their arrival, and even then you downplay your relief. but that’s a little embarrassing to say when he’s listening so intently, so you keep quiet.

you turn to him, shrugging with a smile you pray looks more optimistic than sorrowful.

“we can only ever hope for the best.”

a little hollow, less declarative than preferred, but it works the same. suguru nods in silent agreement.

suguru used to think that exceptional beasts like you and him could not fall in love — that it was the secret of ordinary people. for beings, who can alter the world, were special in indescribable ways. but he’s grown to be more open-minded, more accepting.

because what else could he do? you were so irresistible that it ceased the existence of his birth-given psychology. his mind, altered just for you.

“you know… you don’t have to prove yourself of anything.”

this time, it’s suguru who nudges you. he leans in, and you feel his hair brush against your arm. it tickles, but you don’t flinch. your body naturally welcomes the proximity, tingles and goosebumps etching across your skin. you squint, waiting for him to elaborate. and he does, with one validating sentence that kinda erases the possibility of self-doubt. just for a bit.

“i think you’re strong.”

he’d move stars for you, talk to the moon if it meant you got to keep the shimmer in your pretty eyes. and he’d ask the sun to stay out longer so he could continue seeing your rosy cheeks.

he’d gladly live for infinity if he could be the reason you get flustered forever.

you’re very pretty like this.

his eyes are watchful, observant as you scoff bashfully, avoiding him. and you quietly respond, with that same soothing voice. he thinks it could be a lullaby.

“i think you’re strong too.”

suguru smiles, nodding and all-knowing. he pokes you playfully.

“i know.”

you’d complain, but his tone lacks any arrogance. just a statement, enough said. because he knows how you think, how you observe.

and while you don’t say it out loud, your eyes are telling him ‘thank you.’

how beautiful the act of reading an expression is. of knowing a person so easily it’s like clockwork, unraveling intricate details to form a conscious understanding.

he watches your eyes narrow, and awaits a question he knows is on the tip of your tongue. your face looks a certain way during contemplation.

“you like doing this stuff?” you ask, tilting your head. “being a sorcerer, i mean.”

as if the two of you had other options. you didn’t.

but there’s something comforting about answering known questions. speaking the obvious into existence, letting the information linger in the air.

“i like it.” suguru replies, smiling. “if you get rid of the bad stuff.”

his voice gets quieter at the end, but you save him the questioning glance and smile back.

you hum, nodding. “like what?”

and you can name a million bad things. every day is a reminder of them. the two of you have that in common. but thankfully, the world has been kind enough to not let you experience them. your optimism hadn’t been tainted.

and as you expressed to him — you try not to dwell over the ticking clock, only ever hoping for the best.

suguru’s hands are behind him, propping himself up as he gazes at sheer, distant clouds. the sky is a pretty mix of yellow, orange, and red. evening approaches.

“well, all that self-sacrificing stuff for the betterment of mankind — for starters.” he sighs, head leaning back. you wonder if you imagine the way the slight slivers of sun sparkle against his skin, and how angelic his aura seems in that very moment.

you scoot a little closer, gaze matching his as you look upwards.

“we’re helping so many people, though.” you reply, glancing at him for a second. his eyes are closed, like a cat basking in the warmth of the light. you want to kiss his cheek.

“we are.”

“i think it’s cool.”

“it is cool.” he affirms, nodding. one eye opens, and he shamelessly stares as you obliviously observe the world. suguru is suddenly grateful that this view is currently only reserved for him, as he’s sure anyone would fall in love with you in this exact moment. yet, at the least, he wants you to see yourself in his neutral vision.

but butterflies cannot see their own beautiful wings, so he’ll gladly worship you quietly.

he looks at your hand on the grass, right beside his. it’s contemplation that’s been built up for months, thoughts of you invading all his senses. suguru figures that if he had a flower for every time he’s thought of you, he could walk through a garden forever. he inches his fingers closer.

and pauses when they’re less than a centimeter away, pulling back as you break the silence.

“i mean, i’d die for you guys too.”

suguru tenses, and you grow nervously quiet from the sight of his surprised expression, feeling suddenly embarrassed. an awkward laugh leaves your lips in an attempt to ease the gloom of your words, and you mindlessly wave your hand. “if it came down to it, y’know.”

you would in a heartbeat. you’d do it a thousand times over if you could, but you don’t tell him that. that proclamation is reserved for only you.

and as suguru looks over at you, stares, he doesn’t think he’ll ever despise an idea more than he does now. it’s blazing, the thought horrendous.

“don’t say stuff like that.” he demands, shaking his head brazenly. you can feel his eyes still on you, and he’s lost his smile. “don’t ever.”

all the defense, the stoicism, stemming from the thought that — yes. he 100% believed you would die for anyone. and that terrified him more than anything.

suguru isn’t sure how to communicate his thoughts in a softer way. he doesn’t mean for his demeanor to grow so cold again, but it bothers him - makes him sick - that you can say things like that so easily.

“i didn’t — i’m sorry.” you stutter, eyes wide. you swallow thickly, “sorry.”

and again, it’s hard to be upset with you.

but this, he can be against. he needs to be.

“you can’t think like that.” suguru speaks, softer this time. it’s pleading, as if he’s begging for a bit of mercy. and he is. “please.”

he wants to tell you that it’s okay to be selfish, to prioritize yourself first. but it would seem a bit hypocritical coming from him, because he knows he’d throw everything away in a whim if it meant keeping you safe.

love blinds him, he supposes.

“okay.” you nod, eyes on the floor. “i won’t.”

you’re considerate enough to lie, despite knowing full well that your words don’t align with your mind whatsoever. and you think suguru knows that.

he’s staring. you can feel it, eyes as intense as a midnight sky. you feel a little afraid to look up and meet them.

but it’s only instinct when he speaks your name softly, a coaxing whisper among suffocating tension.

you think he looks ethereal when being clouded with concern. godly, towering upon you. the magnitude of his gaze truly shows with the lack of distance. you register the feeling of his hand on yours before anything else, the touch searing from pure shock. a large palm covers your skin.

“… i’m sorry. i just care about you a lot.”

worry is care. it’s one of the greatest devotions — the act of panic for another person.

suguru thinks that romance may actually be the most horrific thing in life. that it’s not curses, but love. it’s the deepest weakness.

“you kill me when you get injured — when you speak like that.” he mutters, and the two of you don’t say a thing as his hand inches higher.

it feels a little harder to breathe.

“can’t promise i’ll stop.” you reply, a pitying smile finding it’s way on your face as you watch him close his eyes briefly.

“i know.”

suguru feels a little like a broken record player, doomed to repeat the same phrases like it’s clockwork.

it’s futile, you’re mutually aware.

he can’t control you, he’s unable to dictate what decisions you make — no matter how stupid, or how horrid they are to him. but he can’t bring himself to stop trying. maybe, if you’re reminded your value, you’ll eventually think the same.

but, honestly, the way you’re looking at him right now could make him believe anything.

“did you find out who’s joining you tomorrow on your mission?”

the corner of your mouth quirks upwards, and he knows your answer before you say it out loud. he grins.

your other hand places itself on top of his, and you smile back. heart giddy, but you try your best to keep your composure.

“i pulled a few strings.”

•••

december, 2015.

you wonder if growing up not only changes your body, but your soul.

because it takes a long time to realize how truly miserable you are, and even longer to see that it doesn’t have to be that way.

it’d be kinda hard to feel your unhappiness now, regardless.

“i prefer if you keep them outside, megs.” you wince, eyeing the dirt-covered paw prints on the hardwood floor.

the two perpetrators stand on either side of their summoner.

flushed and clearly embarrassed, megumi curtly nods. his hair moves the slightest with the movement, and he turns his head away from you, kicking his foot back and forth. “sorry, i wasn’t thinking.”

the dogs leave your eyesight quickly after. you snort, playfully rolling your eyes at him, walking over to ruffle the dark spikes on his head.

“it’s okay, don’t worry about it.” you smile, silently pleased when he doesn’t move away from the ministration. he’s always been more lenient with you, a fact you hold high over a certain white-haired sorcerer. “plus, i’ll just make satoru clean it up.”

if you had blinked, you might had missed the way megumi’s mouth quirks up, satisfaction clear as day. it makes you giggle, up until you finally inspect him closer. your eyes linger on the dirt covering the side of his white shirt, and you softly sigh, pursing your lips.

“how was the curse?” you ask, nudging him a little where the stains are most prominent. “roughed you up a bit, huh?”

megumi’s introduction to jujustu wasn’t entirely seamless, but he was definitely a natural. an anomaly, like satoru. born with talent.

you watch as his face turns sour, and his eyes suddenly narrow, the stoic expression more familiar. he avoids your gaze and looks at the door expectantly, mumbling something under his breath.

“what?” you reply, brows furrowing as you lean a little closer in hopes he’ll repeat himself. megumi’s mouth opens again, and he’s about to, but an obnoxious ‘i’m backkkk!’ interrupts him.

you share an unimpressed look with the younger boy.

satoru strides inside, whistling with a grin. you’ve spent too much time with him, years ticking off your lifespan from both the annoyance and contentment that he simultaneously brings into the world. he and megumi had left early in the morning, and it was around midday now — too long with him, as you can clearly pinpoint on latter’s face.

satoru’s hands are in his pockets, and he shuts the door with his shoulder, leaning back against it.

“missed us?” he smiles, and he walks over to throw an arm around megumi, which is immediately thrown off. satoru glares momentarily, but quickly looks back up at you, clearing his throat. “missed me?”

you stare, sighing softly before gently tugging megumi towards you.

“i missed megumi.” you correct, crossing your arms. your head motions to him, “and why does it look like he got pushed on the floor? i thought you said-“

“it was a grade three!” satoru immediately exclaims, and points to the boy beside you in accusation. “he told me not to get involved.”

despite his adult frame, satoru never really outgrew his childishness, still quick to blame anyone other than himself. his defensiveness was mildly irritating, but you've come to grow used to it. your head shakes disapprovingly, and you huff. “he’s thirteen, you idiot.”

satoru’s smile turns a little mischievous as megumi looks at you quizzically, a frown on his face. “so?”

you rub your head in annoyance, ignoring satoru’s ‘oooo,’ and gently flick megumi on the forehead. “you’re not an official student yet. dealing with curses by yourself can wait. for now, you fight with satoru.”

satoru dramatically sighs, and much to your dismay, approaches you. his arm infamously wraps itself around your frame, body leaning towards you, and it feels like the weight of an elephant, crushing you as you stumble. he doesn’t let up. “you worry too much. and he exorcised it! maybe with a little less ease than expected, but-“

he grunts when a hand collides with his side, and you’re too busy pushing him off to see the way he sticks his tongue out at megumi.

maybe your concerns were a little irrational, but your heart was in the right place. megumi was still young, still enrolled in a normal middle school — albeit, close to his last year — and you had originally planned to keep him completely innocent for just a while longer. no world of killing, curses, and whatnot. but satoru had pushed him into it within the first few months of his complicated adoption, and you secretly knew that there was nothing you could do to completely shield that side of the ugly world for him.

so, you suppose the least you could do was teach him how to protect himself. in case you or satoru couldn’t.

“well,” you sigh, defeatedly. there’s a lopsided smile on your face, and you expectantly look to megumi. “how was it, then?”

there’s a boyish smile, a little shy, that appears on his face. “cool.”

“see!” satoru grins, arms raising in victory. “he loved it, and he should probably do it more often-“

“fine, fine.”

it’s always been pretty futile to argue with satoru. not only is he stubborn, but painstakingly arrogant. he tends to think his ideas are always the best, simply because they’re made in his very head. and you can’t discredit them, because normally, they’re alright. but it can be frustrating. he’s also really hard to deny.

it’s only natural to give in. just so you can avoid drawing it out.

“awesome! i think he’s ready for a special grade!” satoru claps his hands, and you deadpan, rolling your eyes.

“don’t kill my kid.” you mutter, shaking your head as you turn, ignoring the way satoru’s smile settles into something a little more genuine. heartfelt, maybe.

truth be told, you’d trust satoru with everything and more. you worry and fret, but at the end of the day, he’ll still be there. he’s been stuck to you like glue for years now, and it didn’t help that you practically live under the same roof. different rooms, but realistically having no actual space. it’s nice, and you really do hold him in your heart deeply. at an arm’s length.

you end up being stuck with cooking dinner yet again — satoru winning because otherwise he’d ’poison the kids’ (which, you think is stupid because he could easily just follow a recipe. also, he’s used that excuse before.) — and it’s like clockwork, a routine, when you find yourself sat across from him on the couch afterwards, tsumiki and megumi long gone in their respective rooms.

you’ve found that gojo satoru acts a bit differently when it’s just the two of you. less irritable, and easier to talk to; you’ve noticed this since you met him. his voice gets quieter, the blindfold comes off, his hair falls, and you’re presented with a more raw version. and maybe the kids get a different version too, but you find that hard to believe when megumi’s distaste is so palpably strong.

“movie?” satoru asks, peeking at you through narrow eyes. his face is a little smushed by his palm as he leans against the armrest, and there’s a lazy smile on his face. he looks kinda tired, weirdly enough. exhaustion is so foreign on his face that it looks almost fake. you wonder how much he slept last night, spotting hints of darkness beneath the pretty blue of his vision.

you think it’s strange that you don’t get sick of his presence, even after all this time. that’s it’s forever missed more than loathed. you’re always in such close proximity, practically doing everything together, and yet you find that crave him every second he’s not beside you. pitifully, it might just be the attachment issues you’ve subconsciously formed, and have unfortunately plagued satoru with. but that reason just seems a little too sad for you to fully admit. everything realistic is somehow bitter. you softly sigh, momentarily closing your eyes.

you’d love to stay, just to hear his idiotic rambles and comments. they always brought more substance than the film itself. and he’s been gone all day. you rub your forehead, feeling a small inkling of guilt.

“i have a mission later.” you reply, apologetically, and smile sincerely. “but when i come back, yes.”

an active report coming from a town over — information on paper only describing the energy as ‘ominous.’

“oh,” satoru’s eyes widen, and though you’re unable to read the exact emotion on his face, he seems a little alarmed. nearly wincing. he’s kinda upset that you didn’t tell him sooner, that being visibly clear — but then again, did you really have an obligation to? he didn’t really tell you whenever he had missions. but that was because he’d return in a few quick hours every time. satoru didn’t like being gone for too long either. he never dragged out his departures; he hated to leave you by yourself, even if the kids were with you. it feels a little cruel. you watch his eyes dart towards the windows, and he shifts, facing you. the movement is a little awkward, and he pauses before his speaks, hesitant with his words. “want me to go with you? it’s kind of late.”

it’s sweet that he asks.

“satoru,” you chuckle, tilting your head. “it’s a couple of second grades. i’ll be fine.”

a little white lie, but you craved some action. satoru always got stuck with the interesting missions, and even then they posed no such threat to him. all of your assignments were simple, too easy to be considered enjoyable. if this was going to be the route you were taking in life, — exorcising curses — then you could at least make it somewhat fun.

satoru can tell something’s off. you’re too dismissive, and you won’t look at him directly. but he feels as though it’s not his place to scold you, and he trusts you dearly, so he ignores his gut.

“alright.” he shrugs, his arms moving behind his head as they nonchalantly cross, contrasting the way he feels a little unusual. “call me if you need anything.”

•••

december brings cold winter air, and you blow into your palms, attempting to warm the skin that’s begun to grow a little numb.

more people should go on nightly walks, you think. maybe then it’d be more calming. every street you’ve turned to is nearly empty, the only comfort being provided by dim overhead lights. but you suppose you’ve gone through more fearsome events, so this shouldn’t really be that big of a deal.

it’s a little frustrating to be walking around so aimlessly. the report gave no specific location, just the brief mention of a couple of previous sightings. by now, they’d more-than-likely dispersed to other areas.

you’re slightly tempted to call satoru for some help, as you’ve never been the best at detecting curses at a long-range, but you refrain.

it was late, and you know he’d probably never let you live it down.

satoru would never say ‘no’ to you. but there comes a price with that reliability and expectancy. small instances, like when you caught a cold, and had asked him to order for you at a coffee shop because your voice had been to sore to do so. he complied, but not without a relentless amount of teasing, even going to far as to lie to the barista, saying ‘sorry, she’s just really shy.’ he lived for your embarrassment, and it was generally harmless, so you couldn't reprimand him for it.

but sometimes every time, he’d have his own small apology. like how right after you had returned home, there was soup coincidentally ordered on your front porch.

satoru had walked inside without looking at you.

he can be tolerable. rarely.

you're nearly persuaded to go back home, midnight beginning to take a toll on your tired eyes. as far as you were aware, the curses hadn't caused harmful havoc. but it'd be pretty humiliating to head back without a small victory, and even then you'd probably stay up feeling guilty.

unintelligible whispers break you out of your thoughts, and you blink, eyes scanning the area.

goosebumps arise, and your head turns.

finally.

you nearly jump when you see it, though keep your composure, standing straighter.

it’s hardly detectable, as it stands. fairly large too. it might actually be a second grade.

you huff, brows furrowing as you inspect the curse. this was the cause of the ‘ominous’ energy? you feel it, but it’s looks don’t work well with it’s written description. maybe you’d be heading home sooner than you expected.

your hand reaches behind you to grab your weapon, and you move forward, testing to see how fast it’s reflexes are.

it doesn’t move.

you pause, rolling your eyes briefly.

“at least put up a fight, dude.” you mumble, nearly sighing as it continues to plainly watch you. you walk a little closer, up until you’re only a few feet away, and hum. “you’re not the brightest…”

you insert your weapon back into it’s sheath, and stare. it’s been a while since you’ve had the chance to see a curse so closely. they’re all usually extremely reactive, not sparing you a second before attacking. violence is their prime instinct; the main thought in their heads.

when you reach your hand to poke it, and it still doesn’t budge, you know something is wrong.

oh.

your entire body stills, and you’re certain that you feel your stomach drop to the floor.

something felt familiar.

confirming your terrible suspicions, the curse disappears in front of your very eyes. not exorcised. you’re staring at the empty space that it once occupied, too bothered by the fact that your heartbeat has picked up ten times faster.

you almost reach for your phone, but stop, feeling as though it wouldn't be the wisest decision.

this suddenly all feels a little too calculated. you don’t even attempt to grab your weapon again.

shock numbs your bones. it bleeds through and renders you useless.

you hear your name before you see him, and you figure it feels the same as the nearly-fatal slash toji had given you almost a decade ago. so painful that it makes your heart stop. it’s spoken with such intimate fondness — too much for your poor heart to comprehend.

his ubiquity is so daunting that you’re sure all time ceases to exist.

you don’t want to turn around. you want to run, flee before you know it’s too late. before you hear him speak, and the world comes crashing down all over again. you’ve tried so hard to piece it back together. every tiny detail - you’re not sure if you’d be able to start over. why now? when you’ve finally been better. when you finally believed that normality was even possible to achieve.

but you’ve always naturally given into him, and that habit stays strong even after all these years. you think he knows that too.

it’s with upmost hesitance that you turn around.

you’re not sure what to do.

he’s a sight for sore eyes. healing, beautifully transparent. a dear smile, inviting you closer. or more like a predator awaiting it’s prey. your body is giving you every negative cue, yet your legs stay in place, submissive to his presence that’s been so horrendously missed.

he a little looks older. or maybe that’s just the unfamiliar sight of all his hair down.

“hi.”

a part of you thinks that if you ignore him for long enough, he might disappear. leave you alone, as he’s chosen to do before. he’s lost the right to be welcomed.

fury is really the only emotion you could accurately pinpoint. you hate how soft he speaks. you hate it more than anything.

if you could stomach it, you’d ask him to close his eyes and turn the other direction. you’ve always been weak when he looks at you so intently, as if studying you to the finest detail. but you refuse to be the one to look away first - you selfishly crave his attention more than you value your own self-respect.

and as suguru looks at you, he thinks you’ve made it impossibly more difficult to do anything but beg for undeserving forgiveness. he’s staring at reflective streams, seeing as they slowly trail down your face. it must feel nice to be falling tears, symbolic of raindrops returning to the ocean. he’d like to sit in front of the ocean again. with you, being careless teenagers just for a little longer. but the ocean brings back bitter memories and the thoughts of a certain brunette child, so he refrains from thinking further.

“… don’t cry.”

it’s not a command of any sort, but instead a quiet plea. you’re too pretty for tears. too pretty for pain, too pretty for this unfair life he’s plagued you with.

he watches your eyes visibly widen, and your hand raises quickly, using your sleeve to wipe remnants of your intense emotions. it stains your skin a bit red from how roughly you move, lashes dismally coated with the aftermath.

“i’m not—“ and you huff, your throat feeling tight. your head bows by instinct, and you shake it firmly. you press your palms to your eyes for a few seconds, pushing harshly, as if the pressure could ease some of the shock, or ground you in any way. “i’m not fucking crying.”

cautiously, suguru nods. he’ll play into you, listen to everything you say even if it’s not entirely truthful. anything to make his appearance less daunting and harmful. he waits for you to speak, knowing the sound of his voice may not be as pleasant as he had hoped. he’s not sure what he was expecting.

battered already, in so much internal sorrow you might collapse, you breathe as deeply as you are able to. it shakes, and you opt to biting your lip instead.

harrowing disbelief is tainting your skin and bones, and it feels hopeless to even try understanding why he’s here. waltzing right back into your life, bewitchingly present. words linger, staying on the tip of your tongue as you internally battle yourself to release them. release you.

the air smells like rain. and you think — all this anger, it was once was love.

“i hate you.”

and there’s a frown on your lips, trembling as you try to muster up all of the loathe, resentment, and frustration into those three words.

it fails. because the admission is not of truth — if anything, it’s guilt. for the sole reason that you know your feelings stand the exact opposite.

you hate suguru for leaving you. not him as a person; him as a thought. a thought that consistently runs rampant through your mind, adding fuel to a prevalent fire that refuses to be extinguished. and you imagine that he likes that he still has that effect on you, because the hauntingly serene smile he holds doesn’t even falter, not for a second.

you’re forced to stare at him with that expression, and it feels wickedly taunting. not as comforting as it had before.

“that’s alright.”

it’s all he puts out into the air, and that gentle tone he holds kinda makes you want to hit him. he’s not like satoru — you’re sure he’d let you. but suguru can sense your agonizing heartbreak. he’d sense everything about you with his eyes closed. and he feels guilty for making you reopen old wounds, but he’s unaware that they’ve never been given a chance to properly heal.

geto suguru sees a little bit of you in everything lovely. the sun shining in the morning, the smiles on two pretty little girl’s faces, the moon casting a dim halo over the world at night.

you’ve only become a greater treasure. one to be cherished, to be adored. he’s missed you in his sight more than anything. you’re still a angel on earth, incredulously beautiful. even with tears, even with that despaired look on your face. he’s fighting every urge in his body to not step closer and mend your broken self.

he’d like to run his fingers over your soul and pour his love into each crack he finds.

“give me a few minutes. that’s all i need.”

he’d prefer an eternity. but he thinks that he’s asked for something reasonable.

it’s expected when you scoff, glaring daggers with blurry vision. but it doesn’t make it any less painful.

suguru can take it. he deserves it.

“please.”

the distaste on your face refuses to falter.

you crave to love without it having consequences.

since when had caring become so much of a burden? it’s evil, honestly. maybe stone-cold was the way to go. nanami might be on to something.

“stop this, suguru.” you whisper, hand sliding down your face in frustration as you let out a bitter sigh that lacks any amusement. “leave me alone.”

he savors the way his name sounds on your tongue, the drawn-our syllables holding the same familiar care of nearly a decade ago. it feels longer, too much time spent away from you. it lightens his aura, makes his senses heightened in almost a feral way. you speak of him like fate.

old habits refuse to die, and he stays where he is, the same face of persuasion used as he outwardly refuses your answer.

“kill me, then.” he shrugs, and he thinks he might actually die from the way your frown falters into shock once again. his smile twitches, nearly threatening to downcast.

it should be what you do.

suguru was a dead man. that fact hadn’t slipped your mind. you remember when satoru saw him, in the flesh, after the sentence. he couldn’t bring himself to kill him then, and you could briefly recall the look on his face when you softly told him you could eventually do it if he wasn’t able to. that solemn twinge, knowing something you wouldn’t admit out loud.

because satoru knew, better than anyone around, that if you went through with it, it would break you past the point of repair.

suguru, seemingly satisfied with your stillness, steps a bit closer.

it kinda feels like doom. you think the world may stop for a moment, and that all the bad things in life will come and finish you off. that death will take your hand, guiding you, kinder than anything that’s ever really touched it. because what it’s held before has cursed it.

when his hands reach up, you expect a knife in the throat — any consequence for the stupidity of your compliance. but the blades are soft, and they raise to hold your face. gently, as if earning the trust of a stray kitten. because they’re not blades, they’re his hands. he feels you shaking against them. and it’s odd that all tranquility really needs is a certain sight; reassurance in the form of a graceful being who has been absent for too long. you don’t move. you’re unable to. instead, you stare, taking in a lost future. hair you used to brush yourself, eyes that would watch you with such visible adoration. they still do, and that realization alone has your head hurting.

you feel his thumb wipe below your eye, and it feels cold over your heated skin. suguru sighs, his eyebrows furrowing ever-so-slightly.

“you’re very beautiful.”

it’s spoken almost hopelessly, as if the admission physically hurts for him to say. in a way, it does. he’s let go of one of the last devotions to you that he’s kept bottled inside of him, because he knows this might be the last time he sees you. he has to let everything go. you need to know what he thinks of you, how important you are. how he’s submitted his soul to the disaster of loving you since you were teenagers.

by the way his eyes narrow, and his pupils grow just a tiny bit bigger, your eyes widen, and you’re pushing him away instantly.

you know what comes next. you’re able to predict it before it’s able to horrifically conjure itself out loud.

“no, suguru.”

he follows after you, a firm yet gentle hold on your forearms stopping you from completely leaving. you’re already shaking your head, biting your lip as it threatens to quiver. he’s trapping you, and he knows he’s already won.

“let me.” he coos, rubbing the skin of your trembling limbs. and you try to convince yourself that you shouldn’t sympathize, or fall for that sweet, missed voice of his. how he’s just a stranger you unfortunately know everything about. to ignore gentle aura you’ve missed so much that you felt as though you’ve never been able to get a grip on the pain in your chest. “let me say it.”

you’re not built for this, not capable enough to take another harrowing blow.

“leave — fucking, leave.” you seethe, frantically attempting to pull your arms back, though his hold has gotten stronger, and the fight that you have left in you is quickly diminishing by the second. there’s a moment — the tiniest sliver of time — where you stumble, and you’re being pushed closer to him before you can blink.

“you don’t want me to.” suguru shakes his head, eyeing you carefully as you stop your movements. it’s declarative.

you’d like to slap him. knock some common sense into his head because, obviously. you never wanted him to. not when you were sixteen, not now, not ever.

it’s just defense. because you cruelly know that letting him in will just make everything worse. walls were needed for protection, even if the doors are halfway open.

his hands find themselves cradling your face once more, and he’s pulling you, a small gap being the only distance left between a terrible decision. you’re subconsciously following, body keen on obeying his every move. his gaze feels a little intrusive, looking so intently you have the urge to turn your head and close your eyes. your breath is shaky, and you feel a little light-headed.

you wonder if anyone else in the world has ever loved someone this terribly.

hastily, your hands place themselves on his chest with an attempt to push him away, but they stay pliant. you look at him, incredulously.

“what is wrong with you?”

it’s clear when his expression darkens a little, and he dejectedly looks to the side. you catch his eyes widening a bit, the harshness of your tone foreign, because you’ve only ever spoken to him with such tender care. you’re spewing out words with cracks in your voice, nearly whispering because you’re afraid that if you speak any louder, it’ll truly start a storm.

“you… you kill people, leave me — leave everyone — and then…” your eyes close, and you feel the liquid trailing down your cheeks again before you’re able to stop it. you can’t finish your sentence, too busy holding your breath to calm a threatening sob.

it feels like you’re sixteen again, and everything is crumbling.

his arms move slowly as they wrap themselves around you, and you feel even more inclined to cry when he presses your head against his chest. like he’s done dozens of times before. he sucks, the world sucks. this comfort is long overdue, and you still can’t find it in yourself to complain, simply succumbing to the pressure of his presence. you’d like to hug your younger self. because she needed this, even if it can’t really count as closure. even if you currently felt your knees buckling from beneath you.

“i wish i could take away the pain, pretty girl.”

suguru won’t give you false apologies. he only feels guilt for causing you harm. he dislikes how pain looks on your face, and he wants to tell you that he’s unable to sleep at night without you, that every day is a challenge. that truthfully, the ache is mutual. but he has something to accomplish, and you stand on opposing sides.

the two of you are stubborn people.

“take it,” you tremble, and your arms are already around him, despite the screams in your mind. he feels safe. he feels like everything and more. “please, please, take it.”

the pleading in your voice makes suguru feel horribly ill, and he tightens his grip on you, not really knowing what else to do.

it’s worse when you’re the perpetrator. the criminal, the evil. he wonders what your life might have looked like without him in it — how happy you could have been. should’ve been.

but there’s been bad things — events that he’s sure might had ended horrifically differently without his existence.

he wonders how your scar looks, now.

suguru’s fingers are firm as they reach below your chin, and he forces your eyes to meet once more. they’re red and glossy, but still undeniably captivating. he’d like to look at them forever.

“i would, if it were that easy. i promise you.”

you believe him. it could be from the genuine strain in his voice, or your muddled brain that’s clawing to escape your own head. what good is a healthy mind?

he’s saying your name again, and it’s quieter this time. more intimate. you don’t cower, you stay, even huddling the tiniest bit closer. you’ve given up on composure, you’ll let him selfishly have you. besides, it feels nice when he’s treating you so delicately. hands ghosting over your cheeks, eyes that admire your desperate, sad ones. you don’t stop him this time, numbly prepared for the aftermath.

he pauses, trailing his thumb over your jaw, and swallowing thickly. he’s never quite looked normal. always too perfect in comparison to everything else. he smiles, and you see a hint of something that you can’t really classify as full joy.

“i love you.”

the world doesn’t end.

you’re still looking at him, thinking that it will for a moment. instead, you see bashful pink.

‘i love you’ is such a tricky sentence. it’s powerful, meaningful, and could also be a lie. the power of speech is that there really are no limits, and you suppose that’s what makes bad people. sometimes.

he toys with the collar of your shirt, briefly, and lets out a breath of amusement through his nose. suguru feels lighter. and simultaneously horrible. he tilts his head, barely, his voice quiet.

“will you let me kiss you? even if you hate me?”

there’s a little teasing in that sentence, and he nudges his nose across the side of your face affectionately. you’re unaware of how hard his heart beats against his chest as soon as he asks.

you’re sixteen once more, and you’re silently nodding before you’re able to think further.

you’re imagining fairytales you can’t believe in.

it’s hard to determine how long you’ve thought about it. his lips on yours. your hands are in his hair and on his face nearly immediately. you’d trade a lot of things to be this close for longer — you wish to be combined. and he’s soft. he’s so soft you dread taking your hands off of him. if heaven was a place on earth, it’d be this.

pitiful.

he tastes sweet, like a forgotten dream. butterflies suffocate your insides as you stand, and your knees feel a little weaker. suguru is a bit impatient with his movements, hands trailing down your sides to squeeze and caress. his touch feels hot and is hastily done, but gentle nonetheless. you feel his lips curl up against yours, and your stomach flips.

you rather not pull away. pulling away brings back reality, and fantasy is really all you want. if you kiss him a bit harder, and close your eyes a little longer, you’re able to stay.

he pulls back first.

you’re breathing heavy, eyes wide as they bore into his. he might be the most precious thing in your life, and you’re not sure if you’re able to let him go. you’re afraid that you’ll love him forever, and that you’ll never be in the same place again. this feels cruelly temporary, and you know it is. by the way his expression settles, and the way he repeats those three words so quietly, it’s meant for only you to hear. a fact.

“i love you.”

you swallow thickly, in a haze that’s caused just by his very being. a drug-like addiction, and you feel so content it’s like you’re home.

suguru knows you won’t say it back. and in all honesty, he prefers it that way. it’s what’s best. what matters most is that he knows you mean to. he’s able to read that lovestruck wonder on your face so easily it makes him warm. it was both a relief and horror to be known so perfectly. you, who still wears your heart on your sleeve. he’s forever grateful that you’ve always been so giving, so selfless when it comes to him. he feels as though he abuses your sweet compassion.

you tug on his sleeve.

“we can work something out.” you whisper against him, and suguru knows he’s gone too far. he’s tensing, and his eyes are anxious, a small shake of his head contrasting your nods. “i’m yours. i’m yours before anything else.”

heart, mind, body, soul. you’re bonded for life, and you’ve known that since you were young.

“oh, no, baby.” suguru hurriedly answers, and the desperation in your voice, the way you clutch on to him a little tighter, has his head reeling. he’s panicking. “you’re better where you are, sweet girl.”

you know his mind is made up, that it’s fruitless to try, but you’re so blinded by desires that you don’t even care that you’re begging him. he’s mean, doing this to you. there is no ultimatum or other decision - this is it. you’re just destined to be separate, and that hurts to realize, so you’re glad he’s cushioning the blow. just enough for you to keep standing.

suguru is complicated. he hates that he is, he hates what his life has brought him (the only exception being the beauty of the people in his past; you included), but he’s certain that you’re safer as it is. golden and pure. with satoru, with shoko. and you’re strong. you’re so strong he can’t put it into words.

maybe he had some reasonable motives — riko’s death, yours and satoru’s near deaths, haibara’s death — but they’ve shaped him. shaped you, more, as it seems. you continue your life, even after it’s been tainted red, and blackened with misery. satoru, the same. you can take a bit more. you’ve gone through the worst of it. at least — it’s what he selfishly tells himself.

it was stupid to come see you. kiss you, at that. but he can’t bring himself to regret even slightly. if he’s considered evil, barbaric, he’ll gladly take the titles if it meant spending more moments with you. it’s cruel, not malicious.

you’re still his person. but he can’t have you fully — at least, not in this lifetime.

suguru isn’t really sure he could pass on the torch so easily. to give you up completely — the most ultimate sacrifice. where there would be a possibility of his replacement, and the loss of his heart. he can’t trust anyone with loving you; no one can really love you like he does. he’ll take pride in that.

“you’re going to live a long, happy life.” suguru quietly assures, nudging his nose against yours. your eyes are tightly shut, overall avoidant. this might be a nightmare, if you believe hard enough. “find someone who loves you, and you easily will, do everything-“

“i don’t want anyone else.” you interrupt, eyes narrowing as they open, like the idea is something of the unthinkable. “you’d be stupid to think i do.”

this might be worse than unrequited love, you think. every feeling is mutual, besides the belief that you should be together. he’s the bane of your existence. and that kills.

suguru is reasonable. you understand his refusals, why the two of you can’t be — how immaturely you’re thinking about this. you can’t leave your life behind for him, it’d be asking for your own death sentence and the loss of everything left that’s good in your life.

you can’t create a cycle, as much as it pains for you to come to terms with.

“i can’t have you, pretty girl.” suguru sighs, trying to ignore the way his voice wavers the tiniest bit. he’s growing desperate in persuasion, but even he falls flat against the situation. “i want to, so bad, but it’s not right. we’re not right.”

your chest feels tight as you stare up at him.

you wonder, truly, if he’s aware of all the turmoil he’s caused; that he’s let happen, because he never even came back to offer a mere shoulder for support. he simply left you in the dust.

it hurts to hear, especially coming from lips that had been pressed so wonderfully against yours. you still can’t bring yourself to hate him.

you used to fear irrational ideas. that if you let someone in, take care of you, you wouldn’t really be yourself anymore. independency never worked well, and you’ve strung on a bit too hard to a knight in shining armour. a being like icarus, who’s flown too close to the sun. you were right, it seems.

you’ve lost, and it kills to realize.

bitterly, you remember hearing some time ago that ‘it gets easier.’ or better. it’s been repeated to you, multiple times. the reality is, you’re not too sure. what gets easier is maybe the coping. but even that is still evil and painful.

hopeless, you stand, and your voice feels hoarse.

“… suguru?”

how can you hate something so natural? when it feels as though those syllables are meant to be spoken in repetition. his name means excellence; to surpass all.

suguru looks at you, eyes previously occupied with gazing upwards to avoid an act of human emotion. they mirror yours, glossy and faintly red. no visible tears. he has the self-control you lack.

but you can be a little selfish.

“can you…” you take a deep breath, and lean a little forward, resting your head in the crook of his neck to escape a reaction. if he feels the liquid of your tears, he doesn’t comment on them. he’s awfully warm. you’d like to lay in bed with him under a summer sun again. you’re trying to force every part of him into your memory while he’s pressed to closely against you. how his hair tickles your neck, the security of his loving arms keeping you from physical harm, how pretty he looks up close.

it’s not greedy to ask for a final request, you think.

“can you stay with me, then? for a few more minutes?”

an innocent question, while he’s been nothing but cruel. despite everything, you’re still you.

it reminds him of his youth. when you and satoru would get into playful arguments, gaining a few steps on him, only for you to turn back and check that he was still there. or when you would return from missions, him being the first person you looked for every time, just to let him know you came back safely.

sometimes, you’d come back a bit battered up, and instead of confiding in shoko for help like any other person would, you trusted him with treating the wounds. all natural, because that meant you got to spend more time together. human bodies are fragile things. he realized the true extent of that after toji. you really can’t take anything for granted.

so it’s really no wonder why he fell in love with you. why he came to fully accept it. and his belief stands strong — anyone would. angels are irresistible, he finds. he would sometimes see wings.

suguru’s glad you can’t see his face. because maybe then, you’d catch the sight of a reflective shimmer trailing down his cheek.

the embodiment of your dreams, hopes, and desires holds you so gently, a little tighter now. he nods against you, but it feels disconnected, because he’s faded into darkness that has already consumed him. too far gone.

time is nothing for now.

and you wonder if it actually does get better, or if everyone is just lying to you.

•••

september, 2018.

“sensei?”

blinking slowly, you immediately straighten at the sight of three towering figures above your relaxed position.

there’s a panic that sets in at the recognition of how watery your eyes feel, and your head turns in an instant to cough awkwardly, avoiding their stares.

it’s around noon, judging by how pleasantly the sun shines through the window, and how awake your students look. yuji liked to sleep in sometimes.

“did i zone out for a bit?” you mindlessly chuckle, the words feeling a little strange on your tongue. you might have a migraine from how much your head is hurting. “i didn’t get too much sleep last night, sorry guys.”

your smile radiates a reassuring warmth, and the concern on their faces leaves by the time you look back at them. if jujustu didn’t work, maybe you could take up acting.

“we finished the warmups you instructed!” nobara beams, short hair flowing after her as she proudly stands. she glances at yuji, her eyes narrowing. “well, me and fushiguro did.”

yuji shoves her.

nobara has always reminded you of rough recovery rooms and gentle curing hands. it makes you a bit nauseous, the nostalgia of it all.

the sight of the whole trio sometimes felt like daggers digging into your heart, stabbing greedy wounds into open gashes before they have a chance to heal.

brighter days for them, a dull ache for you.

“you weren’t awake yet-“

“i told you to wake me up!”

“you did not!”

yuji and nobara bicker for a second, and you feel a little overwhelmed.

because since these two have set foot on campus, they had seemed oddly familiar. unbeknownst to them, but relentlessly distressing for you. you’re silent as you observe, the uncomfortable pit in your stomach staying clear as day. stubborn, because that’s only natural for you.

more than a decade has passed — nearly three years since your last encounter, almost a year after his death, and yet here you are. the hurt just as strong, because you’ve realized that the pain will never fully go away, and you suppose you’ll have to adapt to living with it forever.

but you’re grateful. though you couldn’t go back to the way things were, you have a chance at stopping the cycle. after all, you know little about what the future has in store for them.

you hope it’s kind. you want those grins to stay permanently, for their youth and innocence to linger for as long as possible. because you never had that luxury. the end of your purity was far too quick, adult emotions flooding your senses. you’d do anything to keep them from feeling like you.

plus, you’re allowed to grieve over the child you could’ve been.

“alright, alright,” you blink, interrupting them before their voices can get any louder. they immediately quiet down, turning to you expectantly. it freaks you out a little.

you were still relatively new to whole teaching thing, not used to being followed so attentively. it felt weird to give orders — to have them be listened to, really. satoru was more of a natural, his cheekiness benefitting him perfectly. even if the students found him undeniably strange.

“give me ten minutes and i’ll meet you outside.” you wave a hand, pointing to yuji. “and sorry kiddo, you’re doing some laps for getting up late.”

you fight a smile as you witness a pout form on his lips, nobara’s laugh drowning out his whining. you’d probably only make him run one, but it was always amusing to lie to his face. you adored yuji — he was a bundle of joy graciously given to the universe. it’s pure luck that he ended up with you.

you watch as nobara drags him out, your head resting on your palm, softly chuckling. they complimented each other well. like siblings, you think.

your head turns, finally facing eyes that hadn’t strayed away from you since you woke up from your daydream. it's like a sixth sense now. you know when he's looking at you, when he seems genuinely bothered. it took time to know him. he’s a hard shell to crack.

“you don’t get special privileges, megs.” you snort, motioning your head towards the door. “go join them, i just need some time to wake up.”

megumi looks unimpressed (and honestly, when does he not?), sighing softly before coming closer. the cushion beside you sinks as he sits, and you raise a brow questionably. his voice is blunt, quiet as it fills the room.

“you think too much.”

it surprises you a little, but you’ve come to learn that megumi is rarely predictable, and to always expect the unexpected.

“do i?” you muse, your smile visibly weakening as you softly laugh.

he was too aware of everything, perception like no other. he reminded of you of suguru sometimes, behavior so nonchalant in comparison to the rest of the world. they were both silent observers.

megumi nods, and you realize he’s rather close, only a few inches away from grazing your skin. touch was something megumi struggled with growing up, so you never pushed it on him; you hated making him uncomfortable, while satoru could care less. the giant didn’t understand boundaries. but sometimes, movie nights in his adolescence led to him latching on to you in his sleep. he had his moments.

it makes the action of his hand raising, pressing your head into his shoulder, much more meaningful.

“don’t think.”

megumi’s never been one for melodramatic situations. growing up, he’d used to complain when tsumiki would force him to watch disney movies with her, getting visibly annoyed when he’d spot her tears during more heartfelt scenes. you never brought up the fact that he’d let her rest her head on his shoulder (you secretly wonder if that’s why he’s doing that now), or would rub her back. megumi’s not kind, per say, but he knows how to secretly love (in his own, strange way. similar to satoru), and you think that’s more important than anything.

“that’d be cool.” you sigh, closing your eyes. your eyelids feel heavy on your face, and you try not to get too comfortable, remembering that you’d have to get up in a few minutes. “wish it were that simple.”

megumi hums, staring straight ahead.

your past is a secret to him, tightly kept in the confinements of your heart. and that's really the only hint he's ever needed to know that it still affects you. satoru, the same. he knew little about your lives before he came into the picture, only hearing bits and pieces when you and satoru would get a bit sleep-drunk and giggle about old memories. he's always tried his best to listen, soaking in any details he can. people are generally more honest and open when physically tired. it's why they confess things during late night conversations, and why the flow of words comes out more natural.

you were different from the idiot that had originally taken him in. megumi can scream from every rooftop that he hated gojo satoru (despite it being secretly untrue), but you? the mediator, who he looked up to more than anything? impossible, it’d be criminal.

maybe you disliked seeming hopeless in front of him, but he didn't mind that vulnerability. he wished you'd trust him with it more — that you knew he would never dream of judging you. he's not too well with words, or communicating, really, so he's also not too sure how to tell you. a double-edged sword.

"you're okay, though — right?"

his eyes glance downwards towards you, dark blue highlighting the inklings of concern. it's not awkward when he asks.

he has a heart, despite satoru's beliefs.

heart warmed, you grin, raising your head to look at him with crinkled narrowed eyes.

you find it funny how the world works. going in some strange, bittersweet chain of events because here you were, caring for the life of a dead man’s son while he had permanently tainted yours. and you're happy. not completely, but sun shines through. the blinds are halfway open.

something that had once seemed so dark has been becoming technicolor.

"yeah." you nod, sincerely, and pat his cheek gently, stifling a laugh when his face scrunches in silent disapproval. "thank you for asking. really."

his face gently pulls away from your touch, and you can tell he's slightly flustered, just a tad embarrassed at your small affection. you're grateful for him, unbelievably thankful for the bits of effort he's always put into caring about you (and tsumiki. and maybe the tiniest bit for satoru. tiny.). a true blessing.

gingerly, he stands up, hands in his pockets as he glances at you again, double-checking. you smile.

he only continues to walk towards the door when you give him a nod in reassurance.

you're left staring at your hands when he leaves, a soft sigh escaping your lips. some days are harder than others. it's the toss of a coin, no chances pre-determined. you simply wake up to the surprise every time.

admittedly, you miss the version of you that doesn’t really exist anymore. naive, but more open. fearless and valiant, only ever seeking improvement. you feel bitter that you took that time of your life for granted.

you’ve found that everything’s felt easier, though. something in the air is different.

“hey, did you leave the kids outside? it's hot out there and they're complaining like crazy-“

you hear footsteps come to a halt, and your head tilts up, finding satoru in it's vision. he stands in place by the door, eyes wide as he stares.

"hey," you nonchalantly wave, stretching to alleviate the soreness in your muscles. "i'll be out in a second."

you attempt to get up from your seat, but satoru ushers towards you, stopping you from successfully moving.

"woah, woah, woah — what’s got you so blue?” he asks, scanning over you briefly. there's a light-hearted smile on his face, and if you didn't know him well enough, you might have mistaken it for amusement. but it's down-casted slightly, and he's looking at you a little too intently.

you snort, rolling your eyes playfully, “i’m not blue.”

satoru blinks, unappreciative of the response that he can only justify was from being around him too often.

“fine — what’s wrong with you?” he corrects himself bluntly, crossing his arms. your eyes follow him as he takes a seat beside you, and you internally sigh, thinking about how you’ve left your three students to perish under the sun.

you wave a hand dismissively, "nothing.”

“aw, c’mon,” satoru drawls, and you have half a mind to complain when he sprawls himself over your lap, his eyewear pushed upwards and off his face as he looks up at you. the blue twinkles, even under the fluorescent lighting. “you’ve never been a good liar.”

“okay, now that’s a lie. a bad one.” you scoff, poking his nose. “i’m a talented actress. oscar worthy.”

he playfully winces, narrowing his eyes at you. “no one’s ever been honest with you before, huh?”

“who needs opinions?” you roll your eyes, nudging his head softly. “it’s all about self-love now.”

“yeah, yeah,” satoru whistles, peering up from one eye, the other closed as he visibly relaxes against you. “see how far that takes you.”

you gasp dramatically, “mean.”

the corner of his lips quirks up, and his familiar smirk returns.

banter was natural with satoru. it was hard to take anything seriously with him around.

he brings joy in mundaneness.

“you shouldn’t trust megumi, y’know.”

confused, you pause, looking at him questionably.

“why?” you ask, and you’re internally conflicted as you attempt to recall every recent memory in your head that’s a classified secret. or, something you’ve generally told megumi as of late. nothing comes to mind.

“dunno. he told me something was wrong with you when i walked past him right now.”

your eyes widen, and you groan, head falling back against the couch’s soft exterior.

traitor.

“so,” satoru continues, and his voice is softer, a little more serious. “really — what’s wrong?”

it’s always been pointless to beat around the bush with satoru. he’s impatient, immature, and wonderful. a bad mix that makes you wonder how it’s even possible that he’s generally likable.

“nothing.” you emphasize, rubbing your head in slight annoyance. “he’s making it up.”

you rather not have this conversation. not while the air is half-hearted, and everything has been steady. but he’s right there. and it might not hurt as much as you think it will.

satoru gawks, mouth open, before poking you harshly. “now you’re calling our son a liar? low blow.”

you huff, “he went lower by betraying me.”

a beat of silence.

“so he was right?” satoru blinks, and he’s sitting up hesitantly, awaiting your voice, or a movement. anything to confirm.

“will you leave me alone if i say no?”

“no? you just admitted he wasn’t lying.”

“oh. yeah.”

you’re smiling lightly, faintly awful because you’re not too sure how wise you’re being. maybe this was only the mature option.

“um… i was just thinking. about him.”

you hadn’t really spoken much about last december. there was no tension or anything — it was just a touchy subject for the both of you.

satoru had more right to be bothered.

you expect his expression to drop — for it to grow uncomfortably quiet, leaving you to voice a regretful apology. you’ve rarely seen satoru break. his joyous front is him in natural form. sorrow doesn’t look right on his face.

he’s only been at his worse around you. and that’s a fact that binds you for life, as dismissive as you two seem to act about it.

angels carry weights off your shoulders, and satoru smiles a little. albeit, visibly bittersweet, but a smile.

“we do that a lot, don’t we?”

he’s stupid, annoying, and infuriating when he looks at you like that. as if you two are similar, and he knows how to ice the bruises on your back.

(he does.)

geto suguru is an enigma. is, because even in death, he’s found a way to stay alive. he lives in memories; in thoughts that keep both of you awake at night.

“i guess i just …” you trail off, staring at the floor. you’d be okay with living the rest of your life by satoru’s side. he’s peace, and he knows you tenderly.

you exhale, a small bitter chuckle leaving your lips.

“i don’t know what to do with all the love i have for him.” you admit, arms laying flat as you shrug with a despaired smile that makes satoru feel a little hollow. your hands flow freely, motioning for a few moments before resting back in your lap. “i don’t know where to put it.”

you haven’t known in years. it’s bundled up, suffocating your insides and exhausting your soul. he’s too well tangled with it.

a lot was left unsaid.

answers you crave, questions that will forever follow.

“i’ll take it.”

satoru grins, and you have to bite back a smile from how infectious his expression is. it radiates sunshine.

you feel his warm hands cup over yours, and he gently rubs across your knuckles with his thumbs, soothing that isolating cold. “you can give it to all of us, actually. but more for me.”

he’s silly, and he’s everything and more.

you wonder if you would’ve made it through without him. he’s impacted your life so heavily, you can’t imagine a world void of his presence.

“you’d like that, wouldn’t you?” you mumble, smile ever-so-visible as you playfully nudge him. satoru nods feverishly.

“i’d adore it.” he’s beaming like the cheshire cat, and your expression falls flat as you await whatever idiotic words would flow out of his mouth next. he brings a finger to his chin and hums.

“you know what, though? maybe give some extra to megumi. but i’m not really sure any love could save that kid. not even a mother’s. he's creepy, i'm telling you-“

“satoru.”

he innocently smiles, eyes closed. “just a suggestion.”

you playfully roll your eyes.

it’s all romanticism until it truly hurts. love seems so small, so trivial, when you’re not being affected.

satoru hides his grief better than you ever could. he copes uniquely, and you suppose his way may even help you a little.

they should invent a healing that is linear, you think. so you can’t fall behind, and you can be all-smiles too.

but you’re close enough.

just the right amount, actually.

#geto suguru #geto x reader #suguru x reader #geto suguru x reader #suguru geto x reader #suguru geto #jujustu kaisen x reader #jjk x reader #jujustu kaisen #jujustu kaisen fanfic #jjk angst #stsg x reader #gojo x reader #jjk #gojo angst #geto angst #anime x reader #jjk gojo #gojo satoru #jjk x you #jjk season 2 #satoru x reader #jjk geto #jujustu kaisen fluff #jjk megumi #fushiguro megumi #yuji itadori #shoko ieiri #gojo satoru x reader #satosugu x reader

[arminsumi]

˗ˏˋ꒰ 🍒 ꒱ i still like you

Gojo x gn!reader

Overview; rejecting Gojo in high school, but figuring out your feelings much later when he's become a teacher at Jujutsu High

Content; headcanons, angst with fluff/happy ending

Warnings; rejection talk, heartbroken Gojo 😭angsty romance

Note; call him SADTORU cuz he cryin' over u

REJECTING Gojo Satoru is difficult. The man refuses to believe that you're rejecting him.

"Huh?" is his initial response. Then he laughs. "You're a good joker. Really got me there."

He is convinced for the first few months that it's an ongoing joke. He still brings you flowers as usual. He still flirts with you in the locker rooms. He still kisses your cheek as he giggles and runs off back home, like how he's done since you two were kids.

But he slowly, very slowly, realizes that you don't reciprocate his feelings. That his passion doesn't pierce the veil you have draped over your heart.

For years he still acts as usual, but more toned down. There was a time he would smile at you, then tear up when you left. He made a playlist that ended up being the heartbreak playlist. He rejected anyone who asked him out, except for an odd few who he tried with. But that was just to try and forget you, and the impression you made on him.

Now he's become a teacher, watching over Yuji and the others. A lot of time has passed. His students were told many times about the one who rejected Gojo-sensei and when you were introduced to them, Yuji even said "Oh, the one who rejected Gojo-sensei in high school lol?" ("Yuji!!" 💢Nobara smacked him)

You sat with Gojo in his office that afternoon, drinking tea. He hadn't lifted his cup, clearly something was on his mind (er, and he also didn't like tea. But he knew that you did, so he made it for you.)

"Hey, remember when you rejected me? Well, I know this is gonna sound childish, but I held onto my feelings all these years. I still like you."

You can't believe your ears for a second. He's pushing into his thirties soon, and yet he still possesses the pure and boyish feelings from his high school years.

"It feels like as I got older with you, my crush matured. Kinda like it graduated from being a crush and became..."

He trailed off, the final word on the tip of his tongue. Those bright blue eyes teared up under his silken blindfold.

"Love." he chuckled.

"Satoru..."

"Sorry, I've just been in a reminiscing mood lately. Ignore me."

"Satoru, is it too late to tell you how much I regret rejecting you?"

He stutters. The high and mighty Gojo Satoru, who always had a cocky and self-absorbed edge, stutters.

Jokingly, he lifts his blindfold and looks at you with one eye. "You jokin' with me?" he laughs nervously.

"No, I'm serious." you tell him honestly. "I was on a different plane of existence back then. As the years went by I started wishing that I said I like you back."

His heart races. It races like it used to back in his high school days. When his crush on you first developed.

#♥️ 𝐆𝐎𝐉𝐎 𝐒𝐀𝐓𝐎𝐑𝐔 — 五条悟 #fluff #angst #angst with a happy ending #gojo #gojo satoru #satoru gojo #gojo saturo #SADtoru lol 🤭 #gojo x reader #satoru x reader #gojo fluff #jjk #jujutsu kaisen #jjk fluff #jujutsu kaisen fluff #jjk x reader #jjk x you #jjk x y/n #jujustu kaisen #jjk gojo #jujutsu gojo #gojou satoru x reader #jjk satoru #jujutsu kaisen satoru #gojou satoru x you #college au #gojo satoru fluff #gojo satoru x you #gojo satoru x y/n

[takumifujiwarastan]

"look at me, not him."

pairings: megumi fushiguro x best friend!reader contents: jealousy, sprinkle of angst, a bit suggestive, reader has a bit of traumatic past but not too many details. no established relationship (yet)!

594 words

a/n: very self indulgent bc i js wanted to write for mah boi megumi <3

he couldn't hate yuji.

he couldn't hate the fact that he was stealing your attention away from him more and more with each passing day.

that the small smiles only he could see were now becoming regular when you were around the pink haired boy.

of course, he's more than happy that you're smiling. the shell that had been enclosing you for so long was finally starting to break in the company of safe people who cared about you.

he just wished it was him who made you smile like that.

since when did he start wishing that? he couldn't remember. he couldn't count the days he's spent thinking about you. the nights he spent dreaming about you. you somehow slithered your way into his mind along with every thought that whizzed by.

it used to be just you and him. being unofficially 'adopted' by gojo a few years after he was, you'd come to know him most your whole life. he knew everything about you. he knew the background you came from. the pain you suffered. every hit you took. every time you got back up and kept going.

he missed the days of just him and you. lazy afternoons in each others' dorm rooms, spent basking in the warmth of the sun that shone through the window and talking about whatever. sleepless rainy nights that ended with you in his arms, your breathing in sync with his as the rain pattered against the glass of the window.

and the rare smiles he got to see from you whenever you were with him. him. not yuji.

and its yuji you're waiting for now, as you stand patiently at the end of the hallway, where he said he would meet you after showering and changing after training.

megumi's sharp eyes narrow at the sight of you waiting for someone other than him yet again. without even a second thought he starts padding down the wood floor of the dorm hall.

"y/n." he breathes out, stopping just a few feet from you. you look up at him, meeting his eyes that seem to carry unfamiliar emotion behind them.

"hey..." you reply softly. "you alright?" the question falls from your lips so innocently, in such a clueless matter he can't be upset that you aren't spending time with him. his eyes soften at this, then closing them with a sigh.

his fists then ball up at his sides upon hearing yuji's voice at the other end of the hall. he turns his head and shoots him a menacing look, to which the peach haired boy with widened eyes retreated back to his dorm.

you turn your head and watch as yuji goes back into his room, shutting the door hastily. "megumi, me and yuji were going to-" your irritated tone is cut off when a hand is brought up to your face, tilting your head back towards the raven haired boy as he crashes his lips into yours, a small gasp escaping your lips when your back hits the wall. his free hand is seated on your waist, gripping feverishly as he deepens the kiss.

he pulls back a few moments after, looking into your eyes with a fiery anger yet desperate longing at the same time. his hand holds your face so softly, tenderly, contrary to the emotions brewing inside him. his thumb brushing over your cheekbone so delicately, as if you were fragile as glass. you can almost hear the yearning in his voice when he breathes out;

"look at me, not him."

do u want a part 2?

#jjk x reader #jjk x y/n #jjk #jujustsu kaisen x reader #jujustu kaisen #megumi x reader #megumi fushiguro #jujutsu kaisen #jujutsu sorcerer #jujutsu megumi #jjk megumi #jujutsu kaisen megumi #x reader fanfiction #tumblr stuff #writers on tumblr #post #megumi x you #megumi x y/n

[lalalabelle]

"Everything i ever did, i did for you.."

Pairing: Gojo Satoru x Reader

Warnings: just a lot of angst and some swearing

Summary: Yelling at Megumi about his stubbornness that reminds him of you.

Masterlist----check out the other stuff

"Why can't you just trust me?" Gojo chuckled to hide his frustration from Megumi while training at 2 o'clock in the afternoon. He didn't like having this conversation over and over again every time he went to train him and his other students.

"You can't just put someone in danger especially if it's your student!" Megumi was baffled at how unfazed his mentor was at the thought of another student risking his life to save his friend, to save him.

In truth, Gojo didn't like the thought of someone risking their life too but some things must be done in order to protect his loved ones and the son that he's adopted. He saw how willing Yuji was to fight for his friends and he just needed a little more increase in strength and power, that's why they have been training nonstop for the past few days and Megumi did not like that.

"Why can't we just be a team? Why can't i help him? We are supposed to stick together, doesn't that mean-" Gojo was pissed off now, he doesn't know how many times Megumi has argued with him about this and usually he would be calm about and try to reason with him but today wasn't a good day.

"In a real battle, you would not be there to protect him." Gojo glanced at Yuji and then back at Megumi. He did not understand why his student felt the need to question what he was doing when he has explained countless times that this was for the better.

"WHY NOT?!" Megumi was in disbelief when his teacher could only resonate that he would be out of the fight and that his friend was just going to fight for him. Gojo was shocked at his student's change in tone as he looked at him disapprovingly. "I WILL FIGHT. I'LL BE THERE-"

"Megumi..you don't know that." There was a lot of things he wanted to say, how his mind wasn't thinking clearly, how unpredictable the future is, how undefined the battles and wars are going to be, how even he doesn't know if everyone is going to live another day.

"YES. I. DO." Megumi was being stubborn, willing to do whatever it takes to convince his mentor that this wasn't what was best for him or what he wants. "If Yuji is going to fight, then we're going to fight together. All three of us"

Gojo looked away and closed his eyes, composing himself before saying something he might regret later. "You shouldn't even be near a fight! You are too important." He tried reasoning but he knew that it was hopeless, it was really hard to be on the sidelines and watching others fight for you when you are fully capable of doing it yourself.

"IM NOT!" Megumi yelled

"YES. YES YOU ARE" Gojo is getting impatient

"NO!" Snap!

Something broke inside Gojo as he felt tears on his eyes, threatening to fall.

He grabbed his blindfold and harsly ripped it out of his eyes and his tears were fully visible, looking at Megumi with desperation and sadness. "FUCK! WHY CAN'T YOU JUST LET ME DO THIS FOR YOU (Y/N)!" He yelled at Megumi then his eyes widened, he can't believe what he just said. He dropped his blindfold to the floor and walked away. "Enough about this. I'm done talking about it."

Megumi felt bad about the whole thing and went to comfort him under the large tree in their training grounds. "Gojo-sensei.."

"I'm sorry, i shouldn't have yelled at you today. It's just you look so much like her and it's funny 'cause you're not even related" He laughed bitterly and wiped his eyes looking at sky.

"She actually gave me something, it's like a hologram of our shared times together.." Megumi saw Gojo click something and then a hologram of you showed up infront of them, standing and smiling. Gojo kneeled to you like you were the most precious thing on this planet.

"Satoru.." The hologram of you spoke, frowning as you said his name. "Yes, love?" He replied back, eagerly looking at you like he had lost you for years.

"I want to be a sorcerer and protect people on this planet...you don't have to do this with me.." The hologram continued and looked at him sadly. "But i want to!" "I know you do.."

The hologram knelt down to his level and placed a hand on top of his. "Please understand..there's a possibility that we could die but even if we don't, we can never go back to our old lives again..."

Gojo shook his head as if saying that he does not care about those things if he can get to be with you. "Why would i want to go back to my old life, if you're here?" He tilts his head to the side and gives the hologram a grin that slowly turns into a sad smile.

You chuckled at his cute antics and cupped his cheek, looking at him fondly. "My satoru.."

"You're perfect..I-" When he went to touch your hand that was cupping his cheek, the hologram suddenly malfunctioned. Gojo looked down and sighed.

He sat back against the tree, looked at Megumi thrn back at the distance. "Everything i did, i did for her, and now she is in shoko's office passed out because i accidentally hurt her"

Megumi stayed silent and just listened to everything his teacher was saying.

"I guess since you were so much like her that i wanted someone to protect you too.."

#jjk gojo #gojo x reader #gojo satoru #jujutsu gojo #jujutsu kaisen #jjk headcanons #jjk x reader #jujutsu sorcerer #megumi fushiguro #gojo satoru x reader #angst #jjk angst #Spotify

[lev1hei1chou]

By your side

Gojo x reader Genre: Angst to fluff Words: 4.8k Synopsis: Gojo survives the battle in Shinjuku Masterlist

Everything felt like a sick, twisted nightmare. It all started back in 2006, when Gojo and Geto were tasked with escorting the Star Plasma Vessel to Master Tengen. Although the duo tried their best, Riko Amanai met her end, which really affected Gojo.

To make matters worse, your and Gojo's very close friend, Geto, ultimately decided to choose a different path which definitely did not earn the approval of any sorcerer. Well, his ideals weren't the most practical or ethical, but nothing can really be done once he's fixed his mind.

Seasons dont wait for anyone, and just like that, a good number of years passed. You, Gojo and the others you studied with were now teachers at Jujutsu high. A new student by the name of Yuta entered jujutsu high and was welcomed with open arms. Well, not by the higher ups but no one cares about them. You pitied Yuta, for he was haunted by the girl from his past all because of a curse he bestowed upon her unintentionally.

The boy managed to fit in but the news of both him and Rika reached the ears of Geto, who took this as an opportunity to try exterminate all non sorcerers. The night parade of a hundred demons sure was eventful, but it also marked the end of Suguru Geto, the sorcerer.

To finish off his very own best friend with his very own hands was definitely a great ordeal for Gojo, but you were there for him throughout his mourning period. You shared his grief and helped him recover, atleast for the young talents that were now the responsibility of the teachers.

A year passed, and the boy you saw growing up was now old enough to be enrolled in Jujutsu high. You were proud of how Megumi was doing, since you witnessed his growth right from when Gojo brought him in.

History repeated itself when another teenager was put up for execution by the higher ups, but this was for a different cause. It was baffling, as Yuji Itadori was now a vessel of the great Ryomen Sukuna, due to the turn of events.

Megumi took up the task of narrating the events of that night to you. Although it was hard to process the wave of information, one thing was clear. Yuji does not deserve to get executed and this feeling was mutual to you as well as Gojo. You trusted Gojo well enough and knew he wont let it happen.

Months flew by and it was the 31st of October. Many sorcerers were called to Shibuya. A large curtain was cast, and civilians were trapped inside. It was later made clear that it was orchestrated by Pseudo geto, or Kenjaku and this was a plan to seal Satoru Gojo.

It was painful, to say the least. Your lover was now sealed and put out of commission. And seeing your friend's body get used like this was even more disappointing.

Everything now lay in the hands of the active sorcerers, and that itself was a huge burden to bear. Each and every sorcerer went beyond their limits, and that's when Geto's morally gray ideals ran through your head like a broken record. Forcing yourself to shake off the thoughts, you moved on.

The dreadful night came to an end and the aftermath was something no one ever expected. Your comrades were either dead or fatally wounded, the prison realm was in the hands of kenjaku and Sukuna ransacked the entire area within a short period of time.

To make matters worse, Yuji's sentence was now back.

After recovering from your injuries, everything sunk in. Nanami, your closest friend, was gone. Your students went through hell too. Gojo was sealed. And Yaga, was killed by Gakuganji. You werent particularly fond of the old geezer and this only added to how irritating his whole existence was. As fuel to fire, you heard through someone that Yaga was ordered to be executed by the higher ups, which just increased the level of hatred you had for them. Masamichi Yaga, the only proper and trusted adult figure you had in your life, was now gone.

After a list of events, it was obvious that Kenjaku was unstoppable. He went on with his next act of terrorism: The culling games.

The culling games were just as bad as what you faced on the 31st of October. Multiple sorcerers went against each other with only murder in mind, so you had to prepare yourself mentally. You believed in your students' abilities to make it out alive, but who knows what kind of people they'd have to fight.

Most of your comrades were a part of the games, from students to co-workers and the other allies made in the way. It felt like the heavens were against you being peaceful. There was no going back now.

You ended up running into allies, and when talks of the prison realm and unsealing of Gojo Satoru came up, you learnt that the only two items that were capable of nullifying the realm were the Inverted Spear of Heaven and the Black rope. All you could do was facepalm when you realised that the spear of heaven was in a location known only to Satoru, and the rope was burnt away when Miguel fought against Satoru. There wasnt any left. Sweet.

It was hard to deal with the absence of Satoru. Not only was he a significant other, but also a trustable partner and ally when your job was concerned. The one thing that kept you going was the fact that he was still alive, and could be unsealed one day.

And thus, you set out to find other possible ways to unseal him. After battling against a good number of curse users, you met Yuji, Megumi and Hana. You asked them about how they were doing, especially Yuji. Then, you found out that Hana could possibly be the key to unseal Gojo.

A twisted turn of events occurred, and Megumi was now Sukuna's vessel. Who wouldve guessed that the latter had set his eyes on the former. Yuji was no longer the vessel of the king of curses. Tsumiki was a vessel for some curse called Yorozu. Tsumiki was someone who you cared deeply for. She was an extremely caring person who wasnt even capable of causing harm to anyone. To think she was the one to become a vessel was painful, to say the least.

Sukuna battled out against Yorozu, and as an end to it, the latter lost and was killed, thus putting an end to Tsumiki Fushiguro. You wouldnt blame megumi for falling deeper into an abyss of darkness, as his own hands were now stained with his sister's blood.

A player has added a rule to the culling game. Rule 13: As of this moment- 9:09 PM. on November 19, 2018- No new players may join the culling game.

A player has added a rule to the culling game. Rule 14: The game ends when all players except Suguru Geto and Fushiguro Megumi have died.

Kogane's voice rang when you were with your allies. "To win, we just need to defeat Kenjaku and Sukuna" Maki said to you and Ui Ui. The young boy retorted stating that it was no easy task. Ofcourse it wasnt, but Satoru Gojo would make his return soon.

Everyone regrouped at the room and Yuji entered. You had a good number of formidable allies which gave hope for the next mission to be a success. Choso handed over a book to Yuji. And everyone in the place were now awaiting the return of the strongest sorcerer.

After a long discussion as to why it wasnt a good idea to unseal Gojo inside the building, the location was moved to a different place. The allies took refuge behind the rocks that lay. Your heart pounded with anticipation and hope. Angel used the jacobs ladder to unseal Gojo but he was nowhere to be seen.

Hours later, you were informed that Gojo was inside Shoko's lab with Ijichi and Ino. You were beyond elated to see the love of your life after 19 grueling days that were anything but uneventful but a hint of nervousness lingered for some reason. With shaky arms, you reached out to the handle. Taking a sharp breath, you opened the door and your breath stopped.

There he sat on the bed. For a moment, you felt like all the weariness from the past one month vanished into thin air after taking one look at the man. He seemed better than you thought, with extra muscles and all that. You pinched yourself slightly to confirm that this was all real, and thats when you teared up a little.

Shoko noticed your presence and signalled the others to exit the room. What a thoughtful soul. Satoru was now looking at you as well, smiling widely like the dork he is and waved at you to come nearby. Taking short steps, you walked and took a seat next to him silently.

"You couldve taken a picture when you stood at the door, it would last longer" he teased while taking your hand. You had prepared yourself beforehand to not cry, considering the fact that he wouldve been overwhelmed with all the news from the time he was gone. The task however seemed impossible as you broke down right there.

Satoru was shocked for a moment but then quickly regained his composure as he pulled you into his lap. Hugging him tightly, you cried, as if he'd disappear if you let him go. He was at a loss for words too, which was very unlike him, but hugged back and peppered soft kisses.

Breathing hard, you pulled away and wiped your face. Looking into his eyes, you took his face in your hands and kissed him softly, hoping to pour in all your feelings through the kiss. He was quick to reciprocate with equal love and even smiled while kissing. You realised how much you had missed him.

Pausing to catch your breath, you leaned your forehead on his, and the silent acts of intimacy conveyed all the unspoken words. You hugged him again. "I met Sukuna and the bastard in Geto's body" he started. Not liking where this was going, you hesitantly nodded. He took that as a sign to continue "We'll fight on the 24th of December".

You knew the date very well. This was inevitable from the start, so you decided to put all your belief on your boyfriend. A relationship is all about trust..right?

The fact that he didnt say anything about Megumi puzzled you, but it was better to not ask. "Promise that you'll come back to me safely" you said. He gasped, as if he was offended by the mere thought of you questioning his strength. "Are you serious?" he asked incredulously. "Its not that i dont trust you, Satoru. Its just that its Sukuna you're going up against." you paused before continuing "He has his own techniques and ten shadows." He was still visibly offended and turned his head to the side.

Sighing, you smiled and asked again. "Promise?" "No." he snapped jokingly. Slapping his shoulder lightly, you shook your head at how childish he was. "Fine, I promise" This moment made you forget everything that happened and you breathed in his scent, wanting this to last forever.

Atleast you had one whole month left, until worry would consume you completely.

As expected, the much dreaded day arrived and you waited for Satoru along with your students and allies. Yuji turned to look at someone and there he was, in all glory, accompanied by Utahime and Gakuganji.

The audacity of this old geezer to show up you thought. Hopefully he makes himself useful somehow. Just the sight of him made you want to charge and obliterate him right there, but you held back as his help might be needed. The hatred would never subside though.

"Sensei, your cursed technique's in the way"

Satoru smiled and pointed at his back, and Yuji took the chance to slap his back as a good luck. And just like that, Gojo left to the battlefield. Ijichi created a barrier and Utahime started dancing. Within a short while, the much anticipated battle started.

You stayed back with the allies, in order to observe every detail of the battle that unfolded, ready to jump into action whenever necessary. Anything could be the outcome of this battle and everyone was prepared for that. Anyone will have to jump in, with no concern for their fate and give their all.

The ongoing battle never seemed to stop even for a moment, with both sides using their techniques and domains. The result was hard to predict. Everyone keenly observed the intense fight between the duo.

The thought of what kenjaku might be up to lurked in the back of your head, but there was a well devised plan made, so you turned a blind eye towards the thoughts and went back into observation mode.

A strong and terrible gut feeling made you nauseous. Albeit putting your trust in Satoru, you couldnt ignore the bad vibe. As if your suspicion was being proven, something unexpected happened. Something that left horrified expressions in every face.

All you saw was Sukuna with Mahoraga, unleashing his next attack. Everything froze as you stared in utter disbelief. Satoru's body was cut into two parts, and his upper half fell to the ground. He laid in a pool of blood and you felt nauseous.

It was so quick, that you couldnt process it properly. Yuji stood up in shock, and Yuta reached out to unsheath his katana but Maki stopped him. Everyone else were frozen in shock and Miwa walked up to you and hugged you silently.

You couldnt even cry, as it all felt absolutely unreal. A million thoughts ran through your head. It felt like a sick joke. To get him in your life, to almost losing him to Toji, then getting him back, then the whole shibuya incident. Did the forces above hate you so bad?

Why make you meet the so called love of your life just to take him away? For fucks sake, he was all you had. The only family you had. The students were like family as well, but nothing measured up to Satoru. He was your everything: your love, your reason. When you felt like the world was against you, he stayed by your side. When you reached a standstill, he helped you. When you couldnt trust at the initial stages, he kept giving you reasons to trust him and fall hard.

Every single memory you had with Satoru played in your mind like a movie. Swallowing a thick lump, you reached out to pat Miwa weakly.

When you came back to your senses, you realized that time only froze for you. Kashimo was already rushing towards Sukuna. Breathing in and out, you noticed Yuta walk up to you. "Sensei, we need a plan to retrieve Gojo sensei's body" he said. Well, he had a point. But your brain already had too much going on.

Ieiri stood next to you and said "Get it together y/n. I know its hard, but we've got priorities. If you manage to retrieve his body somehow, I'll try my best. I wont let the only people from my life slip away again" "I'll help as well sensei" Yuta chimed in.

Inhaling sharply, you nodded. You didnt bother about what could possbily happen to you. With only one goal in mind, you sneaked into the battlefield with Yuta. By then, Hakari was out of the allies den and by the looks of it, he was going to fight Uraume.

Sparing no glances towards Sukuna and Kashimo, you and Yuta retrieved Gojo's body and narrowly missed a huge iceberg that now fell in the place where your boyfriend laid. With wide eyes, you looked at Yuta, who signalled that both of you had to leave. The nauseous feeling came back as you felt the crimson liquid seep through your clothes. Regardless, you thanked yourself mentally for acting quickly and not wallowing in your sorrows. There wouldnt have been a chance to retrieve your lover's body then.

For whatever reason, you looked back and what you saw made you feel a little terrified. Sukuna now was in a much different form; his face looked different, he had another extra pair of arms and he had a mouth in his stomach. The king of curses looked absolutely menancing. He also yielded cursed objects in his hand.

You then entrusted Satoru's body to Shoko and Yuta, and went back to watching the battle. You trusted their abilities, and your presence might be a distraction to them. Besides, your help might be needed in the battle at any time.

Within a matter of seconds, right after you settled in your seat, Ryomen Sukuna had put an end to Kashimo Hajime. By the looks of it, Hajime's one time attack barely had any effect on the king of curses.

Higuruma Hiromi and Yuji Itadori rushed into the battlefield, not wanting to waste any time. Yuji was fueled by pure hatred, as Sukuna was everything but good to him. Not only that, he massacred thousands while in Yuji's body and also took over his best friend's body now. Hiromi was strong as well. He'll have to read out Sukuna's crimes and let the judge do the work. But truth be told, that wont be an easy task.

The battle was intense again, with Yuji landing black flashes and Hiromi using his own techniques. Retrieving Megumi was important, but the question of how hasnt been answered yet. Sukuna doesnt show any signs of fatigue. Heck, he only looks stronger now.

There were no signs of stopping, and for hours allies swapped in and out to face the monster there. You went out to duel against Sukuna a few times as well, and now your body was decorated with injuries. He was extremely strong, even with lesser cursed energy. You felt that he was weakening physically, but to bring him down? Its going to take an indescribable amount of time.

You were capable of using RCT, so you managed to heal yourself and helped heal the injured allies as well. Everyone seemed exhausted, and the only thing that kept them going was the determination. After coming this far, it would be disgraceful to go back now. It wasnt even a choice to begin with. To give up would mean Sukuna happily finishes everyone off, causes terror and rules the world with Kenjaku.

More than that, to you, this was about your friend's and adoptive son's body getting manipulated like this.

A few more hours passed, and with combined efforts from your side, the curse that terrorised the sorcerer and curse user community fell. You were immensely proud of how every single person on your side fought for the same cause with so much determination and coordination. You also had a sense of gratitude towards each and every one of them.

You were worried about the man who was getting healed by Yuta and Shoko, but you were also glad that a main root of problems was a part of history now. The door opened and the duo walked out, visibly tired. They took one look at all of you and it didnt take long to realise that the enemy had been defeated.

Ijichi walked in with a figure in his arms. Everyone turned and now was facing him and realised it was none other than Megumi. The state he was in made you want to cry. Atleast the past didnt repeat itself fully like it did with Geto. The boy you saw growing up now lay helplessly, body full of injuries. You thought of what he wouldve went through and it pained you heavily.

When Ijichi announced that the boy was alive, you turned towards Shoko, unintentionally holding your breath.

She smiled a little and said that hes alive and well. And then, you crashed onto the chair, completely done in, letting exhaustion take over you. You were still bleeding from a few spots as you prioritized healing the others and now your cursed energy levels had been depleted.

----

When you woke up, the first person to greet you in the hospital bed was Kugisaki. Just her existence there made you tear up, as her return after the incidents of Shibuya was a question mark. Reality sunk in and you let the tears flow freely. The goals were achieved. Your first years were safe and sound. Sukuna was gone. Your second years and third years were safe as well. Satoru was okay as well.

Maybe the universe wasnt completely against you. It just presented you with multiple hurdles. You mentally patted yourself on the back for holding on. It does pay off in the end.

Nobara enveloped you in a hug, and cried with you.

"How are you?" you asked her. "Im okay, Im just glad youre awake."

Right at that time, Shoko walked in, pleased that you were finally awake. "You were out cold for two weeks dummy" she said, letting out a puff of smoke.

"Atleast I can breathe easy now" You got up and hugged her. She was caught off guard at first, but then she hugged back and relaxed. She wasnt particularly a big talker, nonetheless you understood what she wanted to convey.

"What about Kenjaku?" you enquired. "Oh that. Yuta finished him off. We have the body safely with us" Nodding, you walked up to the door. "Ill go meet Yuji and Megumi"

Maki, Panda and Toge were on their way when they noticed you walking towards Yuji's room. They called out to you and after chatting for a while, you learnt the details of Yuta and Kenjaku's fight.

Waving goodbye, you continued and knocked on the Yuji's door. You felt the wind getting knocked out of you. Oh its just Yuji himself. "Im glad youre okay, sensei" he spoke enthusiastically. On the corner of your eye, you saw Choso sitting on the chair. Smiling at him, you asked Yuji to put you down and pat your clothes down.

You spoke to him, and figured he was doing well emotionally, physically and mentally. That's good, you thought to yourself.

Then, you went on to meet Megumi. You were definitely worried about him. You smiled to yourself after seeing him sleep peacefully. Apparently he had already awoken a couple of days back, and even visited you thrice.

Not wanting to disturb him, you finally went to Gojo's room. The same feeling of nervousness hit you like it did when you met him for the first time after he was unsealed. You opened the door slowly, and it seemed that your boyfriend was already aware of your presence outside the door.

He smiled at you again, and opened his arms. He looked different for sure. You ran straight into his arms and he lifted you up in the air, hugging you tightly. This was really him. Your Gojo. He was alive and well. Cue the waterworks, you held each other and cried together. This was a very vulnerable moment for both of you. Satoru crying was not something you expected, but after everything, it would only be odd if he didnt cry.

Letting out everything you held in for this long was a nice feeling. Besides, you could breathe now. The love of your life was here, safe in your arms, by your side. There wasnt even an indicator of the events that happened in the past. And then you realized something.

Breaking away from the hug, you reached out to lift his shirt with hesitant hands. There it was. A huge scar decorated his body in the very spot he was cut in.

"Missed me buttercup?" he asked. Ofcourse he was happy to be back too. Tracing his scar softly, you realised he was not a figment of your imagination. "Why wouldnt I be" you cried out and pulled him in for another hug. "I kept my promise, didnt I?" he sniffled. You choked out a thank you. He then kissed you passionately and you were more than happy to return the gesture. "Deja Vu" you whispered out. "I'll always come back to you, no matter what. You should promise me that too yeah?" He whispered out too. Looking straight into his eyes, you said "I promise, no matter what."

"Do you wanna have some kikufuku?" he asked and you could only laugh. Regardless of what happens, your Satoru will always be the same loving, dorky guy you knew from day 1.

---

You felt someone pepper your face with kisses. Slowly opening your eyes, you saw Satoru, and he gave you one last kiss with an audible mwah sound. It was really happening, you thought to yourself. After cuddling for a while, you got up, just to be pulled back into Gojo's chest.

"Cmon baby its late" you said while looking at the clock. it was 12:30 pm. Looks like 2 weeks of sleep was nothing compared to a night of sound sleep with your other half. "Just a little more time pleaseee" Satoru whined out. Cant really say no to that now.

After a while, you both headed out to have breakfast and there you met all the other students. You didnt really want to press him on and ask about how he felt yesterday and ruin the moment. He's always been that confident individual, so you were worried about his mental state, after going through a defeat like that. Satoru isnt the one to talk about his feelings either, so you'll have to pop the question yourself.

After socializing with the students, Satoru pulled you away. But you weren't exactly done speaking to Choso.

"Love, what was that for?" you enquired, clearly not happy about being interrupted. "WOW I've been deprived of my rights to talk to the love of my life. What an unjust world we live in" he spoke out dramatically.

Laughing silently, you asked "where are we going?" "I dont know" he said playfully. Wrapping your arm around his, you went closer and leaned your head on his shoulder. He reached out to stroke your hair.

"Yknow, I met Nanami, Suguru, Yu and Riko" he started. You hummed. "I spoke to them at the airport for a while. Nanami told me to pick between south and north. But now Im glad I chose north" You definitely did not understand a thing, but didnt ask much. "How do you feel?" you asked. "Hmmmm lets see." he dragged out. "Im not very happy about getting defeated by that curse, but I think I'm more humble now" The last sentence made you laugh and he stared in disbelief. "Are you laughing at my agony now" he gasped out. "I'm not. But baby, you and humble dont go in the same sentence" you teased him now. "Oh come on. Im not very pleased to admit I'm not the strongest" he voiced out. "You'll always be the strongest in my eyes Satoru" you admitted. "will I now?" he wiggled his eyebrows and poked your arm.

Laughing at how adorable he is, you continued to take a stroll with him. "He was crazy strong yknow? Im not sure if i could have beaten him even if he didnt have megumi's ten shadows. I felt like he didnt go all out... In a way, I'm happy that someone as strong as him beat me" he commented. "Yeah, he was strong. We had a hellish time against him" you mentioned.

He may have lost against a curse that strong, but none of that matters to you. Satoru Gojo was here, by your side and that is more than enough.

---

A few days later, all the students and the remaining teachers paid their respects to all the souls that fell. Yuji placed flowers near Nanami's grave. Then, everyone placed a flower on principal Yaga's grave. Megumi stood near the grave designated for Toji. You walked up to him. "you okay?" "well i dont really care" he replied. Maybe Toji did care for his son, but never really showed it openly, so this is what he gets. Miwa silently mourned the death of Kokichi Muta. From the corner of your eye, you spotted Gojo and Shoko near a grave stone. You went near them, and figured it was for Geto. Wrapping your arms around both of them from the middle, you silently leaned your head on Satoru's. You were glad that you were able to properly mourn your friend and the others.

While walking back to your rooms, you smiled to yourself. Yuji and Yuta's sentences were now non existent, thanks to the work of someone. The annoying higher ups were exterminated.

Even if you lost loved ones, made multiple sacrifices, almost lost many people dear to you, it all worked out at the end.

You'd do your best to make sure that this peace never gets disrupted. At any cost. Everyone who you valued, were here, by your side.

----

A/N 2: it took me hours to write this and lmao the whole fight after kashimo dying was all just what i imagined. So yeah.

#jujutsu kaisen #jjk #gojo satoru #gojo x reader #gojo satoru x reader #jjk gojo x reader #jjk x reader #jujutsu kaisen gojo #jjk hcs #gojo #gojo fluff #gojo smut #gojo angst #gojo x y/n #gojo satoru fanfic #gojo x you #satoru gojo #gojou satoru x reader #jujutsu gojo #jujutsu satoru #jujutsu geto #yuta okkotsu #yuji itadori #shoko ieiri #sukuna #Kashimo #jjk fanfic #jjk x you #jjk x gender neutral reader #jjk headcanons

[calypsocolada]

MIDNIGHT RAIN | y. itadori

(this is part one! click here for part two)

synopsis: you and itadori part ways in shibuya. authors note: HI! i'm back! back with a fic with probably the best boy to ever exist. hope you enjoy! cw: sfw, angst, fluff, kissing, blood, gore, use of y/n, slight spoilers for s2 wc: 2.9k

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This was your second mission and honestly you weren’t sure if things could get any worse. Any darker. Any more bleak. The hope that glimmered at the end of this day had long been snuffed out the moment you parted from Itadori. He'd grabbed your hand, pressing a kiss to your knuckles and asked you to stay out of trouble. You promised. 

You didn’t make friends very easily, that and not many people ever took the time to try with you. To try and know you. No one. Until Itadori. You were quiet, he was loud. You were cold and he was kind. He was sunshine, you were midnight rain. Like day and night. But you liked him. You liked him a lot. He tried with you. Tried hard to know you, to know things you liked. What you ate at lunch, what you listened to in your room, what shows moved you. He paid attention. In return you did the same. He’d go with you to bookstores, carry your things and make jokes about the dirty books you picked. You’d go with him to the movies, to see a movie about a worm. It wasn’t as bad as you thought it would be. 

You two had plans for halloween. Like many others you were going to dress as Barbie and Ken. Itadori’s idea. 

Instead you were in Shibuya.

“I told you you’d like it!” Itadori beams as he holds the door open, sunshine momentarily blinding you as you walk onto the sidewalk. 

“I grew to care for that worm.” You said and heard Itadori laugh warmly. Itadori had dragged you to his earthworm movie. He jogs up to you and walks on the side closest to the street.

“I’ll have to show you the other movies sometime.” He says with a smile. You snort out a laugh.

“Yeah, I’d like that.” You say.

The mall was deathly silent. You walked through, your cursed tool clutched tightly in your hands. 

When you were young you’d come here. Your Mom would drag you to her nail appointments but after she’d give you fifteen dollars to spend at any store. It was worth it in the end.

You’d never seen this place so deserted. It was frightening. You blew out a breath and scanned the dead atmosphere. You were tracking down people that were stuck here, bringing them somewhere safe. Panda and the smoking guy, you didn’t have time to learn his name, were close by, doing the same as you. Walking past a store a t-shirt catches your eye.

Rain poured, soaking you through. Itadori had picked up speed, he reached for your hand and pulled you gently towards the dorms. You two had been sitting in the courtyard and had fallen asleep by accident only to be awakened by the freezing cold rain that had seemingly come out of nowhere. You two slipped inside as he pulled the door shut behind you both. You started laughing, wringing out your drenched hair. Itadori shakes his head like a dog eliciting another laugh out of you. 

“Come on, we’ll warm up in my room.” He says, placing a hand on the small of your back to usher you forwards. Friends. Sometimes you have to remind yourself. As much as you hated it you were a hopeless romantic and your mind played up everything, not everything is like the movies. You blushed nevertheless. When you got to his room he unlocked it and let you inside first. You’d never been in his room before this moment. It was clean, a poster of a girl in a bikini hung on the wall. It made you laugh slightly. He followed your eyeline and rushed forwards, ripping it off the wall. 

“Sorry.” He says softly, embarrassed as you shake your head.

“It’s fine, Yuji. I have posters on my wall too.”

“Of half naked men?” He jests as you snort, rolling your eyes.

“No. I was trying to make you feel better.” You say as he stuffs the poster in a drawer. 

“Let me get you something dry.” He says over his shoulder. The gravity of the moment does not elude you suddenly. He hands you a t-shirt and sweatpants. 

“I’ll let you change in peace.” He says politely.

“You- you can just turn around. I’ll be quick.” You say, reaching for the hem of your wet shirt. He whips around and in the mirror you can see how red his face was. You giggle silently and change quickly, hanging your wet clothes over the back of a chair. You look down and smile. It was a spiderman t-shirt, Itadori’s favorite hero. One that reminds you of him. It smelled like him, this whole room did. “Okay, done.” You say as he turns around, you swear you can see his cheeks turn even more red.

“My clothes suit you.” He says, then realizes what he said and buried his head in his hands. 

“Thank you.” You say softly. 

“You should keep the shirt, it’s one of my favorites.” He says as you bite your lip to keep from smiling too much.

“I wouldn’t want to take your favorite shirt, Yuji.”

“I want you too.” He says and you can tell he means it. You blush, nodding your head. “Here,” Itadori starts, pulling the covers back on his bed. “Hop in, I’ll change and then we can watch a movie or something.” You slide under the covers and face away as Itadori changes. He jumps beside you a moment later, flicking on the tv. 

“We could watch spiderman? I’ve never seen it.” You say as Itadori gasps, turning to look at you. 

“You’ve never seen spiderman? Like any of them?” He asks as you nod your head.

“None of them.” You say and he doesn’t answer you back, just turns back to the screen and flicks on the first spiderman movie. You both settle in the bed and you pull the covers closer to your body, still pretty cold. Itadori notices, he always notices small things. 

“Still cold?” He whispers. You nod your head and Itadori moves closer to you, sliding an arm around you, pulling you against him. He’s like a personal heater, his body warm. You gasp, you had never cuddled with a boy. “Sorry, is this okay?” He asks and you have to nod your head because you're afraid your voice will betray you. He pulls you just slightly closer and lays his chin on the top of your head. You should be nervous. You had a crush on this boy and right now you were in his arms. But you were utterly comfortable, you’d never felt more safe and secure in your entire life. 

It was a similar spiderman t-shirt in the window. You blinked a few times and wondered why you were almost in tears. Tonight felt different. You couldn’t stop worrying for everyone. Especially Itadori. You wished you were partnered with him. You were dying to know if everything was going okay with him. If everyone was alright. You just had this sick feeling. 

“Miss?” A voice  to your right startles you but your reaction is quick, if it were a curse you would’ve obliterated them. It was a young girl and her mother. You blew out a breath. You didn’t sense any cursed energy near them so you strapped your tool to your belt. 

“Are you two okay?” You asked as the little girl looked at you with doe eyes, her mother holding her. 

“Are you here to help us?” The mother asks.  You nod your head. “He said you’d be here soon.” She says as she walks forwards.

“Who?”

“A boy, he had pinkish hair. He was heading towards the lower section.” Itadori. Your face lit up.

“He was here not long ago?” You ask and she nods her head. You blow out a breath. Getting the smallest bit of information about Itadori’s well being eased your mind. You escorted the mom and her daughter out of the mall and towards the safe zone where a lot of other survivors were. You remembered your first mission as you headed back into the mall, running the way Itadori had gone. 

The curse was too strong for your first mission. You’d almost died. There’s a lot of things that goes through a person's mind in these moments but all you could think about was Itadori. You didn’t grow up with a loving family, you had no friends to go back to, no one that would miss you if you died. Or so you thought. You’d packed your bag, made your way out to the car that would escort you to your first mission. You tossed your bag into the trunk and heard your name being called. You turned to see Itadori running faster than you’d ever seen. He was almost just a blur. 

“Yu- oof,” His body slams into yours as he sweeps you off your feet in a bone crushing hug. He spins you around as you giggle. 

“I’m sorry!” He says as he sets you down. “I almost overslept.”

“Overslept?” You echo as he nods his head.

“I didn’t want to miss your sendoff to your first official mission,” He says, ruffling your hair. You blush.

“It’s not all that exciting.”

“Yes it is.” He insists. “You’re gonna kill it. Literally.” He says.

“Thanks,” You grin. 

Itadori couldn’t have been more wrong about that statement. It only took four minutes and thirty-six seconds for things to go from exciting to detrimental. The curse had overpowered you, sliced you up in many places, you were losing blood but you were still fighting. You’d rounded a corner and pressed against the wall. You couldn’t stand any longer, your legs giving out as you slid to the floor. First mission failed. Your tool was loose in your hands and you heard it clatter out of your hand onto the floor beside you. You pressed your hand to your stomach and felt something sticky and wet, pain striking through you like lightning. You hissed in pain. If you were going to die it wouldn’t be on the floor. You’d die fighting. You pushed to your feet, heavily relying on the wall. You scooped up your cursed tool and staggered out into the hallway where you saw the curse you’d been fighting standing still before falling to its knees, revealing Itadori just behind it. A fucking superhero. You tool clattered onto the floor startling Itadori. His eyes met with yours, his eyes went wide, taking the sight of you in. 

“Fucking thank god,” You breathed out. You probably looked like a corpse walking.

“Oh- y/n,” His voice shakes as he runs forwards catching you before you could slam into the ground. He gently sweeps you into his arms, rushing towards the exit. 

“I didn’t kill it,” You coughed out, hoping a joke would lighten the moment but when you looked up you could see tears in Itadori’s eyes. You felt shitty for joking. 

You woke up days later in Shoko’s office. Itadori was snoring softly beside the bed, your favorite book in his hands. You slowly sat up. Your midriff was bandaged as well as your arms. You pushed to your feet and padded across the room to the bathroom, flicking on the light. There was a bandage on your cheek and a few bruises and small cuts on your face. You walked back into the room just as Itadori stretched, startling at the sight of you walking around.

“Y/n! You should stay in bed!” He insists, springing to his feet, sliding an arm around your waist. 

“I feel fine.” You say but he’s pulling you back towards the bed and sitting in it with you. “How long was I out?”

“A couple days,” Itadori says, worried expression on his face. You smile. 

“I’m fine. Thanks to you.”

“I should’ve gone with you.”

“It was supposed to be my mission, you weren’t supposed to go.”

“No more missions alone. We’re a pair.” He says, reaching across the space between you both to tuck your hair out of your face.

“You should probably partner with someone who doesn’t get their ass kicked.” You say as he shakes his head.

“I want you. No one else.” He says, sliding his hand against your cheek. “I mean it.” You can’t help but smile. 

“If you're sure.”

“Deadly sure.” He insists. The conviction in his eyes was serious. You must’ve scared him. You remembered walking out into the hallway, you were covered in blood, you probably looked half dead. That would be a scary sight for anyone.

“I’m sorry if I scared you.” You say, looking away from him for a moment. This moment felt vulnerable. 

“I was scared. That curse was strong and then you walked out…” He trailed off, his hand falling from your cheek to gently twirl around a lock of your hair. 

“I feel like a burden,” You say. “You didn’t struggle with that curse at all yet it almost killed me.” Itadori’s eyes go serious.

“You are not a burden. Any person on their first mission would’ve struggled with that curse. It was stronger than predicted.”

“Yeah, but-”

“But nothing. You’re incredible, you’ll see that.” He says, giving you a smile, the first one since you woke up. You nod your head.

“Thank you.” You say. 

It’s quiet for a moment. Before Itadori speaks again.

“I thought I was going to lose you.” He says, a haunted look in his eyes. You reached for his hand, lacing your fingers through his. “All that blood.”

“I’m sorry,” You say, biting your lip. He jumps forwards and yanks you into a hug, a softer one this time, he still holds you tightly though, as though you’ll slip through his hands like sand and be carried away by the wind. You rest your chin on his shoulder and hug him back. “I’m fine now. I feel much better.” You whisper. “Thanks to you.”

“I’g go insane if I lost you.” He says. You close your eyes. 

“I think I would too.” He pulls back suddenly, you both are so close. His eyes flick to your lips before looking back in your eyes. 

“Can I ask you something?”

“Of course,” You say, ignoring the flips and flutters in your stomach. 

“Do I have a chance with you?” He asks. It's quiet as you try and understand what he’d just asked you.

“What?”

“You're so smart and cool. I just- I think some moments you might like me back but you’re out of my league and,” Itadori rambles as you hold up your hand.

“Yuji, hold on.” You say, taking a moment to let things simmer in your mind. “You like like me?”

“Love. I love you.” He corrects. Your lips fall open, your brows hiking up. 

“Love…?” You say as he nods his head. “Yuji-,”

“It’s alright if you don’t love me back,” He says. “I don’t expect you-” You lean and cut off his words, words you didn’t want to hear. You press your lips to his. A soft kiss, that sends butterflies to your stomach, sparkling confetti behind your eyes. Itadori hums contently, his hands sliding up on your jaw, pulling you closer to him.  

You still feel those same butterflies just remembering months later. You rounded a corner and skidded to a stop. The area was a disaster, as though some fight had just happened. Debris was still toppling over, there were large slash marks in the walls. You walked slowly through the disaster, sliding your cursed tool into your palm. Just to the right there was leaking water flooding out of a bathroom and what caught your eye was the striking image of blood mixed with the water. You swallowed and proceeded forwards. Lights flashed inside as you stepped into the puddles, peeking around the corner. Nothing could’ve prepared you for the sight. You understood immediately how Itadori felt when he saw you covered in blood, staggering along through that hallway. You saw his shoes first, the blood pooling around him. He was propped up against the wall, half his shoulder missing, blood covering his face.

“Yuji,” Your own voice sounded foreign as you charged into the bathroom, tears springing to your eyes in an instant as the sprinklers doused you in cold water. He looked dead. Your hands shook. Everything seemed to slow. You two should’ve been dressed in stupid costumes at a stupid halloween party. Should’ve been playing beer pong, you two would win, Itadori was great at that game. He would’ve spun you around so fast after your win, you’d be holding onto the hat on your head laughing. You’d be damned if the boy you loved died. You felt again for a pulse and felt the faintest of ones. Itadori was a fighter. You couldn’t carry him out of here but you could get up to the top and find Shoko. You pressed a kiss to his forehead and ran as fast as you could. You made it back in record time with Shoko in tow but when you skidded into the bathroom, water splashing against your jeans, Itadori was gone. You should've asked him to promise to stay out of trouble. 

#jujutsu kaisen x reader #jjk x reader #yuji itadori #jjk itadori #jujutsu itadori #itadori x reader #itadori x you #yuji x reader #yuji jjk #yuji x you #itadori yuuji #itadori yūji #jjk

[delzinrowe]

Nightmares - Choso x Reader

⠀⠀✧˚ ༘ ⋆｡♡˚ ⠀⠀⠀It's all a nightmare, and you can't wake up.

WORD COUNT: ~2.4K WARNINGS: Angst, hurt, much needed comfort. F!Reader. SUMMARY: Y/N didn’t want to close her eyes. Closing them meant seeing those god awful images again. [Spoiler for Chapter 259!] A/N: This is for all my fellow Choso girlies. Chapter 259 never happened. Stay strong. Stay delulu.

↺ home⠀⠀|◁ masterlist⠀⠀II hc/brainrots⠀⠀▷| kofi⠀⠀♡

One moment.

That was all it took. Just one moment of carelessness. One brief second of Inattentiveness. In the short time Choso had he acted on instinct, ignoring his fear and putting others above him like many times before.

All Y/N could do was stand by and watch, frozen by shock and panic as she witnessed the flames lashing out. Although it happened in the blink of an eye she could have sworn time fate pressed the slow-motion button. There was nothing left she could do.

Tears started to spill from her eyes uncontrollably, they went unnoticed by her. But she could hear someone scream, a gut-wrenching screech, that she didn’t realize came from her own throat.

“Choso!”, it was all she could come up with, all that was in her mind. The image burnt into her mind, preparing to haunt her in every waking moment of her uncertain future.

Red hot flames blazed up high, threatening to set even the air surrounding her on fire. It was only then that she took in the smell of burnt flesh. If there had been time she might have paid attention to the nauseating feeling it caused as her stomach churned.

All too soon Choso had completely vanished, leaving behind not only his little brother Yuji but also Y/N with a heavy broken heart. Her mind blanked, nothing could have ever prepared her for this.

Life as a sorcerer was hard enough, and she knew that there was a possibility of dying every single day, especially with the odds stacked so high against them. Yet, it never occurred to her that she would lose him of all people, in such a cruel way no less.

Him, who she had been suspicious of from the beginning. Him, who she always had her watchful eye on whenever he was around the younger students. Him, who she looked at with less concern with each passing day once she allowed herself to get to know him. Him, who elicited chuckles and laughs from her even when he said something awkward or nonsensical. Him, who opened up more and more to her when he decided to fully embrace his human side. Him, who for some reason kept reaching out to her whenever he wanted to learn more about being human, despite having his little brother Yuji. Him, who slowly made his way into her heart more and more with each passing day. Him, who she was too afraid to confess to…

In an instant everything went dark. A screech rang in her ears for what felt like an eternity. Y/N jolted awake, beads of sweat having formed on her forehead. Her wide open eyes scanned the room, as her body fought to control her ragged breathing.

After a little while her vision accustomed to the darkness, making out the shapes of the furniture. If she hadn’t been so shaken up by the visuals still in her mind she might have felt embarrassed about how long it took her to realize she was in her own bedroom.

However, even in the supposed safety of her own quarters, Y/N couldn’t compose herself. Heavy tears spilled from her blood shot eyes. The smell of burnt flesh, the heat of the flames, even the sight of scorched earth kept replaying in her mind, tormenting her furthermore. Having these moments played out in her dreams repeatedly, being tormented by nightmares night after night… It felt like a cruel joke.

“Well, there’s no point in sleeping now…” A deep sigh followed her mumbled words. Talking to oneself was normal, right? Or maybe she was on the road to going insane. After eventually leaving her bed, she walked into the bathroom to splash her face with some cold water. It was meant to help her wake up faster from her sleepy state whenever she was faced with a nightmare, and with time it had become somewhat of a routine.

She didn’t even spare one glance at her reflection in the mirror. It would only show the same thing: blood shot eyes adorned with dark rings.

Her feet dragged her out of the room. Was it possible for a person to act on autopilot for days on end? If so, it was her recently. She couldn’t tell you at what point she put on her jacket or shoes, or when exactly she reached for her keys and headed out.

Darkness still swallowed most of the surroundings. The moon’s small scythe barely illuminated anything, but in all fairness it was all pretty much a haze and a blur to Y/N anyway.

How long had she been walking? It could have been anything between ten minutes and an hour. She wouldn’t even be able to tell anymore. Much like a zombie she simply kept walking where her feet took her, they had a mind of their own at this point.

She didn’t want to close her eyes. Closing them meant seeing those god awful images again. If only she tried hard enough maybe she could keep them open forever? What a miserable kind of wishful thinking.

Before she knew it she stood in front of a door, the heavy knocking of her own hand seemingly ripping her out of her own trance. Almost aggressively she banged her fist against the wood, only stopping once she heard the shuffling steps behind it.

“Y/N? Wh–” She wouldn’t even let him finish the question, which she knew would only have the same answer as the many times before. Instead she took a step forward and wrapped her arms around his torso, burying her face in his shirt. Once more tears spilled from her eyes, staining the oversized shirt she had her face pressed against.

“You dreamt of it again, didn’t you?” His question was met with a squeeze of her hold as she tried to tighten it more, desperately clinging to his frame as if her entire life depended on it.

“Choso…” The single word she uttered was muffled, but she couldn’t bring herself to care. She knew he’d understand it no matter what, just like he understood that she needed his embrace now more than ever. Quiet sobs followed soon after. Were her eyes hurting from the lack of sleep or the many tears she had cried recently. Perhaps it was both.

“I’m right here.” Choso spoke in a tone that was far more gentle and soft than usual. A tone that was reserved solely for her. It had taken him a while to learn different human customs, yet he knew exactly what to do whenever she wanted to hug him. Thus he instantly reciprocated by wrapping his own strong arms around her.

Learning about human behavior, traditions and customs wasn’t difficult for him, especially when she taught him. He was quick to understand that sometimes emotions needed to flow freely and all he could do was to offer comfort in whichever form he could.

“I can’t lose you.” Y/N kept mumbling her words, almost as if she wasn’t aware that he could actually hear them. It was a moment of vulnerability. Raw and unfiltered. The bare emotion she emitted was heavy yet beautiful.

“You won’t.”

Through the tears she scoffed at his words, barely pushing her head off his chest to shake it in disagreement.

“You don’t know that.” Despite talking to him Y/N didn’t face him. Perhaps she was too afraid of what he might think of her tear stained features. As if he hadn’t seen her weep many times before.

“Look at me.” It was astounding how soft and gentle his tone could be, and if she hadn’t been too busy being plagued by negative emotions she would have praised him for his remarkable empathy towards human sentiments.

But she did as he asked, haltingly lifting her gaze up. One look into his eyes and she nearly forgot the horrifying images that had awoken her earlier this night. For a cursed spirit he sure was enchanting. His presence had an uncannily peaceful aura but no one except Y/N seemed to take notice of it.

Choso glanced at her, he took in every single nuance of those glossy eyes that had shown him compassion and kindness when others had been wary and cautious. He had always been a fast learner and had soaked up everything she taught him about human traditions and emotions like a sponge. He was no stranger to the feelings she stirred up inside him, and he was sure that he caused the same kind of feelings inside her. Or, at least he hoped for it.

He almost forgot that he wanted to speak, all because of the way she looked at him, as if he was her life line. If it had been anyone else the silence might have been eerily uncomfortable, however with her it was everything but.

“I won’t lose me. I wouldn’t leave you alone.” It was a subconscious instinct to pull her tighter against him. For a brief moment he swore he saw the faintest hint of a smile flash on her lips but all too soon she buried her face in his shirt once more. Her weight shifted to lean more against him, perhaps because she felt safe in his embrace. How ironic to show your most vulnerable side and feel safest in the arms of a dangerous cursed spirit who happened to be your former enemy. None of it mattered anymore.

“I should head hom–”

“No. You’ll stay here. There’s no chance I will let you go home so you can experience the same nightmare again.” He didn’t let Y/N finish her sentence, he wouldn’t let her argue over it. The woman knew him well enough to be aware of his subtle stubborn nature.

Unbeknownst to Choso, her lips curled into a soft smile when he interjected her words. The dreadful feeling in her gut dissipated, making space for a happier sensation. She couldn’t explain their friendship properly. With the way the two behaved when they were alone she knew fully well that there was more between them, but speaking about it might disrupt what they had now. For the time being she was happy with how things were. Even if she knew that she should tell him about her feelings before it was too late. She couldn’t bear the thought of her nightmare turning into reality.

Minutes passed as the two still stood in the hallway, and neither of them said anything, simply letting the comfortable silence linger between them. Choso wasn’t sure how much time really passed, not that he actually cared about it. The only thing he cared about was getting Y/N into bed and making sure she could rest peacefully. Only when he heard her yawn against his chest did he decide to break the silence.

“You need to rest.” Admittedly, it was an obvious observation, but in his defense Choso wasn’t sure how to tell Y/N that she needed to sleep, and that he wouldn’t let her leave without at least a couple of hours of proper sleep.

“No, I just need you.” The female sorcerer slurred her words, it seemed quite evident that exhaustion was taking over her. Although she did fight against the oncoming sleep, it was futile. His warm embrace, paired with the way he gently reassured her lulled her into a feeling of safety.

The beating heart in his chest surely exposed his feelings, with her ear being so close to it he was convinced she’d hear it as clear as his voice.

“I’m here, and I’ll always be.” With more and more of her weight leaning into him he couldn’t drag her to the bed on her feet. Further exhausting her or risking her stumbling over her feet was the last thing he wanted.

Despite feeling uncertain of how to proceed, Choso knew he had to get her to bed. His only logical option was to carry her. He didn’t waste any time in picking up the young woman by hooking his arm underneath her knees and pulling her up to his chest. Instinctively Y/N’s head dropped onto his shoulder. The view of her like this nearly made the black haired’s knees give out. How he wished that he could simply tell her what he felt, but now wasn’t the right time. For now he needed to get her to bed and let her sleep without any disruptions.

Which is exactly what he did. Without further delay he carried her into his bedroom, as if she didn’t weigh anything to him at all. No thought went to it, it came easy to him as his physical strength was immaculate. However, once he stood in front of his bed he couldn’t find it in himself to set her down. An intense urge to keep holding her, to protect her and shield her overcame him.

“You’ll stay, right?” Y/N’s quiet words surprised him. Her closed eyes deceived him to think she had already been asleep, which made hearing her voice now unexpected.

“I’ll stay, of course.” Not a moment of hesitation as he reassured her. Nothing could have made Choso leave her side, especially not now. Eventually he gently placed her on the mattress, careful not to cause her any discomfort. Instead of taking his leave he kept his word and stayed with her, laying down next to her with his arms wrapped around her frame.

“Don’t leave, you promise…?” A smile tugged on the corner of the curse’s lips at just how exhausted and sleepy she sounded when she spoke. She fought hard to stay awake long enough to hear his reply. Although her efforts were in vain, before he could reply, sleep took a hold of her and engulfed her in darkness, albeit a soft and warm kind of darkness.

“I’ll never leave.” Meanwhile he struggled to fight his own urge. The urge to hold her tighter and kiss her forehead.

“I promise.”

Screw it. The urges won him over as Choso leaned closer to Y/N. Tenderly he pressed a kiss onto her forehead, which conveyed more emotions than any words he had ever spoken to her. Maybe he was a coward for not telling her about his feelings, but she’d be lying if she said she didn’t know exactly what kind of shared love the two had developed even without verbally expressing it.

Choso glanced at her once more, taking in her still features and how her chest rose and set in a steady rhythm. How come this woman had so easily found her way into his heart? 

Some day he would tell her. Some day she would respond that she reciprocated his feelings. Some day. But until then he’d be by her side even without words to speak.

#stef writes #kamo choso #jujutsu kaisen #choso x reader #kamo x reader #kamo choso brainrot #kamo choso imagine #kamo choso scenario #kamo choso x reader #kamo choso x reader fluff #kamo choso x you #jjk #jjk fluff #jjk x you #jjk x reader #jjk x reader fluff #jujutsu kaisen fanfiction #jujutsu kaisen fluff #jujutsu kaisen x reader #jujutsu kaisen x you #choso

[prdx0invader]

★。＼｜／。★★。＼｜／。★★。＼｜／。★★。＼｜／。＼｜／。★

“𝙞𝙣 𝙚𝙫𝙚𝙧𝙮 𝙪𝙣𝙞𝙫𝙚𝙧𝙨𝙚 𝙞𝙩𝙖𝙙𝙤𝙧𝙞 𝙛𝙖𝙡𝙡𝙨 𝙞𝙣 𝙡𝙤𝙫𝙚 𝙬𝙞𝙩𝙝 𝙮𝙤𝙪… 𝙗𝙪𝙩 𝙞𝙣 𝙚𝙫𝙚𝙧𝙮 𝙤𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙧 𝙪𝙣𝙞𝙫𝙚𝙧𝙨𝙚 𝙞𝙩 𝙙𝙤𝙚𝙨 𝙣𝙤𝙩 𝙚𝙣𝙙 𝙬𝙚𝙡𝙡..”

★。＼｜／。★★。＼｜／。★★。＼｜／。★★。＼｜／。＼｜／。★

♡ — notes yuji x reader, yuji being a cutie, fluff to angst, gn!reader, bad writing, might make this a series with other characters <3 (i made this in the middle of the night so spare me)

★。＼｜／。★★。＼｜／。★★。＼｜／。★★。＼｜／。＼｜／。★

𝘪𝘯 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘺 𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘶𝘯𝘪𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘴𝘦 𝘪𝘵𝘢𝘥𝘰𝘳𝘪 𝘧𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘴 𝘪𝘯 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘺𝘰𝘶, 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘪𝘯 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘺 𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘶𝘯𝘪𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘴𝘦.. 𝘪𝘵 𝘥𝘰𝘦𝘴 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘦𝘯𝘥 𝘸𝘦𝘭𝘭..

𝘪𝘯 𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘶𝘯𝘪𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘴𝘦, 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘵𝘸𝘰 𝘭𝘰𝘯𝘦𝘭𝘺 𝘵𝘦𝘦𝘯𝘴 𝘸𝘩𝘰 wanted 𝘤𝘰𝘮𝘱𝘢𝘯𝘺. 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘵𝘸𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘩𝘢𝘥 𝘯𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘪𝘯 𝘤𝘰𝘮𝘮𝘰𝘯, 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘸𝘦𝘳𝘦 𝘣𝘰𝘵𝘩 𝘸𝘳𝘰𝘯𝘨.

yuji sat inside the classroom, wondering what to do since his friends had plans. EVEN GOJO WAS BUSY. it was like this most of the time though. it could be worst you know. he could be dead right now. yuji got over his little moment of silence and stood up to go home. he noticed somebody pass by. it was ____ . yuji never really talked to them but he thought they were really cool. "hey, ____ !" yuji waved over at them. they turned around and waved back. "why are you still here itadori?" ____ asks. "don't you go wtih megumi and nobara after class?" yuuji looks down embarrassed, "well not all the time..but are you dong anything? maybe we could do something!" he quickly changed the conversation. __ smiled, "no, im not doing anything. what'd you have in mind?" these really had no idea what to do together, they didn't know much about each other. but they walked around a couple of stores in the city to find something that can catch their eyes. there was a close figure store that caught yuuji's eyes. he out his face to the window as his eyes lit up at the figure he was waiting so long to get. "you watch (show name) too, itadori?!" __ questioned. yuuji looks back at them. "duhh!! it's my favorite show!" both of their eyes light up at each other. "marathon at my place?!" "of course!" the two had a sleepover at ____'s place getting to know each other and sitting together screaming to each other aboutt (show name). " ____ where's your family? you mentioned them before but there not here." "oh, they're at (country name) still. i was living with a very close friend of my mom before having enough money to buy this place." "you're lonely too huh?" "what?" ____ looked at yuuji. "it's just me at home...that's kind of the reason i asked if we could hang out." yuuji and ____ lock eyes and smile. "well.. how about from now on you could come over whenever you like. i don't care how long you stay." ____ said with a smile. yuuji hesitated for a sec but agrees. they finally had the company they wanted.

yuuji stares down at a completely lifeless ____ in a hospital bed. he felt so many emotions but the only one visible was betrayal and shock. its been about 3 weeks he's been staying at ____'s place, and the other noticed how close you two were. it just hurts seeing lose another close person. he hated being a vessel even more.. maybe if he never got close to you, you wouldn't have gone out like this. why did it have to be the day he was gonna confess to you? he just wanted to love you and you to love him.

★。＼｜／。★★。＼｜／。★★。＼｜／。★★。＼｜／。＼｜／。★

♡ — author note srry its so bad, i don't know how to write but i'll write more of this cause i like it ♡

#jjk #jjk x reader #yuji itadori #jjk angst #x reader #black reader #yuji x reader #gn reader

[xkaidaxxxx]

Yuji x Reader

hint of angst and hint of fluff

reblogs are appreciated. <3

“You’re hiding something from me aren’t you?” You asked Yuji. You always had that feeling however you chose to ignore it. You didn’t want your relationship with Yuji to end. “Yes. I think it’s about time before things got way too far,” he replied looking over at Megumi and Nobara. Nobara knew about everything but kept quiet. She wanted to tell you. You girls are best friends. She knew she was betraying you by not telling you. After all, you have been dating Yuji for 6 months. “ I’m..dating Megumi..I have been for a long time. I agree with being your boyfriend...because I wanted there to be a cover-up. Megumi and I are not ready to be public right now.” He revealed. Your heart shattered. Tears ran down your cheeks. “Y/n…I didn’t know how to tell you...I promised Yuji and Megumi I’d keep it a secret. I know they need time so...I couldn’t tell you. I’m so sorry.” Nobara said, rubbing your back. You turned and slapped her. Your best friend betrayed you. Yuji made a fool out of you. All the dates and gifts. The “I love you’s.” You feel betrayed, heartbroken, angry, etc. Too many feelings all at once. “I’m sorry Y/n..It was horrible of me to do such a thing.”Yuji said, moving Megumi behind him.  “The 3 of you made a fool out of me!” you sobbed. Gojo walked in at the wrong time. “HEY GUYS IT'S FUN DAY!” he said excitedly then read the fucking room. Nobara’s right cheek is red and puffy. Megumi is behind Yuji. Y/n crying with her eyes showing all the pain she’s feeling. “ How could you three? My friends. My teammates. People I consider family… well-considered family.” you spoke. They replied not a single word. “Y/n come here. Let's talk.” Gojo said. He knew he needed to separate you from them otherwise things would get ugly. You grabbed your bag and phone, walking out with Gojo. “ I never want to see their faces again..” you said, still crying. “Now do you really mean that?” Gojo asked, walking with you. “Yes. Nobara knew about it and y-yet still led me on with Y-Yuji. Yuji taking advantage of me. Meg-umi goes along with it. They made a fool out of me! They betrayed me! They all lied to me.” You replied wiping your tears. You should have trusted your intuition. “If you feel like you’re in a trap then you’re more than likely already in one. Trust me. I understand how you feel.” Gojo replied sitting down at a bench with you. He suddenly started crying with you. In silence. You eventually broke the silence. “Why are you crying?” you asked sniffling. He looked down at you. “ A few unfortunate people like us get betrayed by someone we love eventually..so I understand how you feel,” he replied. After all that crying you both felt okay. You wiped his tears with a tissue you grabbed from the tissue box you kept in your bag for your horrible allergies. He smiled softly. “Now blow,” you ordered and he did just as you said. You then grabbed another tissue and blew your nose as well. “You’re such a baby.” You said to Gojo as you threw the tissues in a nearby trash bin. “Hey you’re the one wiping my tears and making me blow my boogers into a tissue you’re holding,” he replied back smacking your back. “ I was being kind because I care about you! Idiot that hurt!” you yelled smacking him. “ Hey..in all seriousness. I care about you too and we’ll eventually be okay. We’ll heal together.” he said. You walked into the training room with him. “Yeah, that's one of our important goals. Healing and self-care.” You replied with a soft smile.

#anime #fanfiction #jjk x you #jjk x reader #jjk #jjk yuji #jjk yuuji #yuji x you #yuji x reader #yuji itadori #jjk itadori #itadori x reader #jujutsu itadori #jjk gojo #satoru gojo #gojo satoru #gojo fluff #gojo x reader #jujutsu gojo #jujutsu kaisen #anime and manga #fanfic #jujutsu satoru #gojou satoru x reader #jujutsu nobara #nobara kugisaki #jjk nobara #jujutsu kaisen nobara #jujutsu kaisen megumi #megumi fushiguro

[idkfitememate]

The angst inside me yearns to be released. I must write creepy little guy. (Again, no fucking clue who this is as I write)

Male reader for personal reasons?

Male reader for personal reasons.

(P.S. women can read this, but I see a single weird/fetishizing comment? Your ass is getting fucking blocked. Thank you!~ <3)

He shivered as he felt your sharpened canines sink into his neck.

It wasn’t uncommon, on nights like this, for you to slink under the cover of darkness into his room and wrap your car to big and much to long body around him multiple times over, completely covering him in you.

You were too big for his bed, often he could hear it creak underneath what you could fit onto its poor frame, the rest of your body shoved into his floor, masses of hands and tails and tongues and otherwise slithering across the wood silently.

He couldn’t bare too remember the day you became this.

The day you ceased to live.

All he really wanted to recall was that one day you were alive and well, as human as can be, then the next you were… this.

Fundamentally obsessed with everything that had to do with him, a mixture of his and your bond.

There was a reason he had no fear when he found the King if Curses had made his home inside of him.

Because you were here.

Thinking now with what knowledge he had, it would be a lie to ever call you “human”.

You were old, older than most old curses he would inevitably be forced to fight, each being hundreds if not thousands of years old.

But you…

He shivered, and you curled tighter around him, many voices whispering to him - male, female, old and young, just born and on the verge of death - that he was okay, that you would protect him from… the thing inside him.

The pinkette resigned to your grip, feeling a pair of hands wrap around his waist, the teeth that you had planted in him sinking deeper, rumbling purr-like noises emitting from your throat.

You made sure he didn’t feel it.

The pain.

Your nails scratching into skin, teeth puncturing the surface.

You “loved” him far too much.

Tails lightly thumped against your skin and his walls in a rhythm. A couple mouths, some pressed to his skin and some… away from his form panted, tongues lolling out and hot puffs of breath filling the room.

You had been such a sweet boy.

Itadori had found you one day while on an outing with his parents. You had been on a playground by yourself, wearing the classic monster truck tee-shirt and blue kids cargo shorts. Your velcro also monster truck theme shoes flew through the air as you kicked to gain momentum on the swing-set you currently occupied.

Your hair was wild and untamed as you soared through the air, your squeals and high-pitched laughter filling the air. Your carefree mood quickly inspired the boy as he turned to his parents, intent on making them say yes to him going to play with you. But, before he could even get a word out, the adults nodded at him, releasing their holds on his hands, and allowed him to race off onto the wood chip covered ground of the bright and colorful children’s playground.

“Hello!! I’m Itadori Yuji!! What’s your name?” He shouted. You glanced at him, swinging even higher, before leaping off the swing from its highest point.

He watched, slack jawed in awe as you literally flew through the air, landing perfectly on your feet. You had landed with your back to him, dramatically looking over your shoulder to stare at him. You then placed a hand on your waist and flicked your hair over your shoulder and out of your face, so he could clearly see your vibrant (e/c) eyes.

You pursed your lips into a pout with a small glare before braking out into a wide grin, displaying your inhumanly sharp teeth.

“I’m (y/n)! And you better remember it!” Fully facing him you jabbed a finger in your direction before pushing it into his chest, causing him to stumble from the sheer force behind the tap.

“And I’m your new little brother, got it? From now on I’m stickin’ by your side no matter what!” Your grin grew with every word before you snatched his wrist in your hands - your nails were sharp. They nearly pierced his skin - and dragged him onto the play set, climbing with him behind you, laughing when you reached the top first.

And that was how your weird relationship began.

You were there for him, every day. As his mother grew odder and odder and his father grew a bit more distant with each passing moment, you were a constant. Your childish grin and weird ideas - you once convinced him to launch you as hard as he could. You flew three blocks and crashed throwing some rando’s wall - they helped him get through life, especially when he was dumped in the care of his grandfather.

You stayed with him at that point, your parents never being mentioned once by you or anyone, nor had any missing kids reports that matched your description ever come out.

You really were like a little brother.

At least, you were.

He had no control over the situation, and it took years of comforting from his grandfather - who was getting sicker and sicker by the day - and therapy to finally come to terms with it.

Your death.

It was totally on accident, you had convinced him to go on another adventure, taking him to an abandoned building while singing, walking atop the chainlink fences as he walked beside them.

You had giggled when flashing him that signature grin, saying “I’ll go scope it out, you stay here!” or something to that effect.

And you ran inside.

He should’ve ran in after, should’ve told you he felt uncontrollable with how the building looked, should’ve said something.

But he didn’t.

And he was forced to hear your screams and cries die out beneath the rubble of the freshly fallen building.

He desperately pulled at debris, calling out to you to “Just hold on!” as he pulled large chunks of concrete from the pile and threw them away.

How he held your crushed and crumpled body in his arms, shocked to silence and paralysis.

Tears silently slid down his cheeks, soaking into the concrete. Rain began to fall, drenching the both of you.

He cradled your body, sobbing into the bloody mess that once was you.

What part of him mind that wasn’t sobbing was desperately trying to keep what little he had for lunch down. Bone fragments were everywhere, blood had splattered all across… well everything!

He could see a couple teeth and nails here and there and if he looked hard enough, he would’ve seen one of your eyes trapped between some small wall chunks.

The building had quite literally fallen with no warning, and very rapidly as well. The way it had fallen basically landed so much pressure over your body that you had actually fucking exploded.

And so, Itadori cried.

Ignoring the world around him he sobbed and sobbed, paying no mind to how your should-have-been-dead body twitched slightly in his harsh embrace. How you made noises no dead-man should, how the shadows climbed the shattered walls around him, eyes teeth and hands clawing, reaching out to him.

“Ɏ…Ʉ…J…ł…”

His breath stuttered as he hiccuped, refusing to look up.

“Ᏸ…Ꭵ…Ꮆ…Ᏸ…Ꮢ…Ꭷ…Ꮦ…Ꮒ…Ꮛ…Ꮢ…”

His grip tightened, if at all possible. He shoved his face into your neck, iron filling his nose and blood smearing his cheek.

“҉L҉…҉o҉…҉o҉…҉k҉…҉a҉…҉t҉…҉m҉…҉e҉…҉”҉

He shook his head.

”…Ǝ…M…T…A…⋊…O…O…⅃“

He sobbed louder.

“Ꮭ..Ꭷ…Ꭷ…Ꮶ…ₐ…ₜ…𝓶…𝔼…𝙱…𝙸…𝙶…B…Я…Ө…Ƭ…Ή…Σ…Я…

I̵̹̦̓Ṱ̷̒́͂̀̓̍͌̑A̵͎̦̻̰̯͇̗͙̿̄̑̈́͊̓̽D̴̙͉̺́͊͒̎̄̎̈́̉̚̕ͅO̶̟̻̬̥͑̿̊̈̎̍̚͝͝R̷̡̦̮͕̥̰̈́̅Ĩ̶̪͍͙̲͇ ̶̢̟̤̩̪̥̄Y̵̧͉̝̓̏̒͑̋̊̊͠U̴̟͉͔͙̟̮̤̗̩̓̿J̵̧̛͖̠͔̺̙̬̩̎I̴̢̡̫̰̥̮̺̥̱͌̀!̵̢̓͂̇!̸̤̱͓̿̔!̴̬̯̙̱̆̃̋̚!̶̰̱̮̹̳̥̬̀̄̀̿ͅ!̸̡̤̟́̔͘͝!̵̱̱͑̐̓̚”̵̧͚̩̝͚͍̭͛̓̀́”

He wailed as he felt the millions of hands wrap around him and your “human” corpse. It wailed with him - you wailed with him.

Thousands of sounds, from a howling dog to a screaming bird echoed as you sobbed with the boy, over your own death.

…He should’ve seen how his mother shook when you were around. Like something was deathly wrong. Her skin would pale - more than it already was - and her eyes would widen slightly. She was good at hiding her fear.

Fear of you.

He should’ve also noticed how whenever you were in a room with him or his family and others were there, you’d play the “don’t see me” game. It was simple in practice, pretend you weren’t there.

Itadori struggled, obviously, but it was brushed off by other adults as him having an “imaginary friend”.

Like they couldn’t see you.

How you’d wonder around those people and they simply didn’t notice your existence, your presence concealed from everyone besides his family.

Besides him.

How whoever you went, chaos and despair were sure to follow, with your long animalistic nails dragging lightly on someone’s skin, their name later showing up in the obituary. How you’d mutter something in someone’s ear and they would later be found guilty for the serial murders of their entire family. A glance in their direction and a new extreme suicide method would be discovered, following their death.

You were an enigma, one he wouldn’t bother solving through his rose tinted glasses.

But now, with the howling sounds of… you(??) behind him, he didn’t know.

Maybe it would be better to solve you, maybe it would’ve been better to get to know you on a more than superficial level.

Maybe he should’ve looked between the cracks of your carefully constructed caricature and see what was beneath the surface.

The monster beneath the surface.

‘He was damn good at hiding it.’ He mused, coming back to your warmth wrapped around his own, the… whimpers - he had no clue the man could make those noises… he wouldn’t mind hearing them more often - of Sukuna.

He wondered how long he had, subconsciously, known of the Jujitsu world after being introduced to you.

How often he saw small time curses and brushed them off as tricks of the light.

How often people on the streets assumed he was insane as a child when he spoke to air, having a full conversation.

“̷B̷…̷i̷…̷g̷…̷B̷…̷r̷…̷o̷…̷t̷…̷h̷…̷e̷…̷r̷.̷.̷?̷”̷

You didn’t speak much, but when you did your voice was commanding.

Even if the most prominent voice in the millions of overlays was that same voice that of the child who introduced himself as (y/n) all those years ago.

He turned to you, eyes meeting yours with hundreds of pupils dotting the whites of your scleras. Sharp teeth finally dislodged themselves from his neck, a smaller tongue coming forth and licking the wound.

“Yeah, little guy?” He responded. He tried so hard to not see you as wrong. As his little brother.

It was hard but he was pulling through, especially when you had near the same personality as back then, if not a bit more protective.

“ᒪ…ᓍ…ᐺ…ᘿ…ᖻ…ᓍ…ᑘ…”

Smiles placed themselves across your form, it reminded him of why you snuck in at night.

You didn’t want to get him in trouble.

You didn’t think of yourself and how you could get killed - he didn’t doubt his teachers, but he knew for a fact the couldn’t kill you, no way - and how sad he would be after.

You were always like that, putting his likes before your own, much to his chagrin. It was funny that way, with how you insisted to do everything for him, despite claiming him as your “older brother”.

“I… I love you too, (y/n).” Your purrs rumbled out again, loving whenever he used your name.

A part of him was grateful that you didn’t introduce him to the Jujitsu world in his youth. You hadn’t dragged him in head first, kicking and screaming.

Hell, as far as he was concerned, you never even meant for him to fall down this slippery slope but he did, and he was happy that you stuck around.

He was even more happy that you could calm - terrify would’ve been the right word - the storm that raged inside his head.

That beast.

That damned laughter echoed around his skull, constantly reminding him of failures.

Of his failure to Junpei.

As though you could feel the sudden sadness, you whined, shoving the appendage most like a head in the junction on his neck. He giggled at the feeling of a tongue running across his skin, rubbing a hand on your head(?).

“Hey now, settle down.”

A noise came from you, somewhere between a quiet bark and a yip, as you settled down, continuing to nuzzle into him.

He loved these nights.

Unfortunately, he no longer had them.

With the recent war - is this a war? He hadn’t even gotten a drivers license or gotten his first job how could he be part of a war? - he had no time for sleep.

It was constant moving, never spending more than one night in one place. His life consisted now of three main things:

Eat. Fight. Sleep (if you can).

Over and over, he never slept enough to give you a chance to slip into his grasp and share the moonlit nights chuckling at you and his little jokes.

And with that result, he could hear The King’s voice grow louder in his head. Taunting and laughing at him for every misstep and mistake.

For every death.

He was on the verge of giving up, of finally relinquishing control and sitting the recesses of his mind, ignoring the world till he was killed.

Then he met his older brother. And learned of his other brothers.

Searing pain ran through his mind at the revelation, a few images of you flickering through his brain as a harsh reminder.

And today was no better than the rest.

All. Fucking. Day. He was forced to fight curse after curse after curse with no rest. He could feel the dried blood on his skin and the screaming and aching pain of his joints and muscles, begging him for at least one full night of sleep.

He couldn’t.

Not with HIM mocking him at every waking moment.

He was loosing his grip on reality, his steps less prominent and his punches not hitting as strong as usual.

“Yuji!”

He could barely pay attention to the man who called him. His older brother..? Right, yeah. He’s fighting right now… Why is he fighting?

At that moment a punch landed to his gut, launching him back a few feet, he kneeled to the ground, clutching his stomach.

A groan left his lips as his eyes grew weary, struggling to stay open. A kick hit that same place as the punch, causing him to flip and roll over, crying out in pain.

Tears began to slip from his eyes. He knew he couldn’t keep this up for much longer, but sleeping would mean that HE would have a chance to.. a chance to…

The boy curled in on himself, arms around legs and legs pressed to his chest as he lay on his side in the middle of the road. Whimpers and tears escaped him as he laid there in fetal position, the cracked concrete beneath him growing wet with each passing second.

He felt weak.

He felt worthless.

Finally his body began to rapidly shake with how hard the sobs that tore their way through his throat were. He wailed into the air, hands gripping at his clothes. Everything stopped as he cried, the curses onslaught slowing as the half-curse looked back at his broken brother.

But as he screamed and sobbed, the air changed.

Static filled the sky as the world grew eerily quiet around them. The air stilled and something dark began to form behind the boy.

“̴Y̴…̴o̴…̴u̴…̴v̴…̴e̴…̴h̴…̴u̴…̴r̴…̴t̴…̴Y̴…̴u̴…̴j̴…̴i̴…̴e̴…̴n̴…̴o̴…̴u̴…̴g̴…̴h̴…̴”̴

Your voice rung out as clear as a bell, effectively silencing any attempts to speak out.

You were huge - easily towering over most buildings surrounding them, which stood at around 430 ft - looking like a mass of wriggling arms and mouths, tongues whipping wildly in the air. Eyes crowded around area of your body, looking in multiple directions but focusing on the now whimpering curse that had dared punch and kick Yuji. You were worm like, noted the half-curse, something like a centipede or millipede, arms and legs supporting your weight and shuffling your body forward.

But then you leaned down.

At the front of your body was an impossibly large mouth with sharpened teeth. Some of which protruded from parts of your lips and cheeks. Your maw opened and a long tongue like appendage slipped out, slithering in the air like a snake. The end opened and a much smaller form poked out, this smaller human-esk form being barely four ft in height.

A boy with dull (e/c) stared back. Long (h/c) hair flowed down his back, tied with a (f/c) ribbon. Only his waist up was exposed, but what they could see was covered by a (f/c) kimono with a gorgeous sash.

The small figure-head of a boy looked like he had jumped straight out of ancient Japan, completed with a scowl.

He opened his mouth to speak, and that’s when they saw how hollow the boy was. No teeth, no tongue. His mouth was pitch black.

[̲̅“][̲̅H][̲̅…][̲̅o][̲̅…][̲̅w][̲̅…][̲̅d][̲̅…][̲̅a][̲̅…][̲̅r][̲̅…][̲̅e][̲̅…][̲̅y][̲̅…][̲̅o][̲̅…][̲̅u][̲̅…][̲̅”]

Multiple of your mouths licked their chops as you stared down the curses, paying no mind to the half-curse.

A chuckle.

Hands flew off you from every angle, gripping the flesh of the now crying curses, ripping and tearing away at their bodies. Chunks of curse were thrown into open and waiting jaws, the crunch of deformed bones echoed.

It was only a moment more until the black haired man noticed the lack of sobbing.

It seemed the same for you because immediately after his thought, your body snapped up to glare at the top of a building. Your body climbed back up to what he realized wasn’t even your full height to stare down at the building.

To glare down the tattooed pinkette.

Animalistic growls of various kinds left your many throats as you stared down with such vibrant hatred that it made lesser curses nearby actually killed themselves in fear.

“k…i…ຖ…ງ…໐…f…¢…น…r…Ş…ē…Ş…”

Unlike his usual prideful expressions and loud boasting, the man was silent, a grimace on his face instead.

“You…” He growled.

It wouldn’t take a genius to recognize that the two of you had history. Those glares you gave each other were more than just ‘seeing the enemy for the first time glares’. Those were glares with passion.

Pure and unbridled hatred.

The air around the area of you two became so damn oppressive that it felt as though the sky itself was fallen down on all those below you. The half curse fell to his knees and griped his head in pain.

He noted others doing the same. Whether it be a curse or one of the sorcerers who came when they felt the shift on the battlefield or saw your… summoning?

It didn’t seem to matter as one by one, everyone and thing fell to their knees.

The biggest issue was the fact that not even The King’s aura had every cause something like this. Sure he was suffocating but never to this extent.

That only left…

You.

‧꒰˚ʚ🎀ɞ˚꒱ ‧‧꒰˚ʚ🎀ɞ˚꒱ ‧‧꒰˚ʚ🎀ɞ˚꒱ ‧‧꒰˚ʚ🎀ɞ˚꒱ ‧



Back when man first made its claim across land, showing its might against enemies;

The first true fear was born.

Dark and grim in shape, it was built off the deepest and darkest desires and nightmares of sentience.

The one thing feeding its dark heart?

The primal fear of being prey.

Of being hunted.

It was the predator to humanity, the thing destined to wipe it out and what of which every other fear would soon be born of.

It was that which lurched in the shadows, it was that which watched from the deep, it was that which breathed down their necks.

Eyes to stalk your every move.

Ears to hear your every step.

Noses to smell your scent from miles off.

Legs to rush you before you could run.

Hands to grip you so you’d never escape.

And mouths to swallow you whole.

…

It fed on people’s worst fantasies.

Changing its shape to fit in, to sneak under the now watchful fearful gaze of humanity.

Taking on a man or woman’s face. Or girl or boy.

…

It fed on the worst of the worst. Tasting their sinful flesh as they committed atrocities to their own kind.

Kindled fires that turned to wars and fed on those cries.

… Till it found a boy.

A boy who gazed at it with no fear. A burning rage in his eyes.

One that could only be snuffed with bloodshed.

It took him under its wing, training him, teaching him. Hiding him from those whom wanted him dead.

But he grew arrogant.

He had grown, two faces and two arms with an added mouth then adorned his form.

He truly thought he could over take it.

Instead, he died; Or rather, he was sealed.

It felt nothing when this happened. Finding the situation to be telling.

And so, it continued. Feasting on the fears and darkest desires of humanity while watching the amass of beings like it grow.

Then, it took on the form of a child, dressed in the common wear of the century. The world was advancing, shiny metals making up the village’s - no, cities as they were now called, with the human populace unimaginably rich in numbers and cultures.

It met a boy, whom uncannily looked like the one it had taken in years ago, as did the boys father.

It vaguely remembered a concubine the other had, but never the less, it smiled.

T’was a new dawn, a new day, and a new life.

And that “boy”?

Well, he was feeling quite good~

…

“To a new era!~ Raise your glasses and cheer, fellows of the dark!~”

Lmao I’m tired ૮꒰˶ᵔ ᗜ ᵔ˶꒱ა˖⁺‧₊˚

#jjk x reader #jujutsu kaisen #jujitsu kaisen x reader #x reader #x gn reader #x gn y/n #Gn reader #gn y/n #I’s sleepy #goodnight 💤

[skunaskitten]

The Full Moon ch1

Paring: weretiger sukuna x reader

Contains: fluff, baby weretiger yuji, protective sukuna, Four armed sukuna, sukuna with tiger ears and tail, angst, big cat cuddles. marriage, pregnancy

Warnings 18+: smut, hybrid smut, death, character death, blood,

Summary: you were sent off through the forest to find the shrine of the weretiger but instead the beast found you. After bringing you into his home you soon find out who he really is and your heart starts to fill with new emotions.

Parts> chapter1 [chapter2] [chpater3] [chapter4]

You have known and heard about a beast that terrorized the villages near by, a man that shifted into a tiger beast. It was not the typical man that turned into a beast on a full moon with a silver bullet to kill him. No this was a cursed man who was once the greatest sorcerer and now he was a beast that terrorized everyone. So many rumors and stories about him eating people, stealing children and taking women for his needs. You didn't believe too much about those stories until you see it for yourself. All you knew is this monster had destroyed your village and burnt it down to the ground. Killing everyone you knew as you watched them burn. From what you knew is that he only attacks villages if they did something to him.

The neighboring villages wanted to team up to take him down to invade his home and destroy it. The forest that surrounded his shrine was filled with creatures and courses, which was another thing they had to worry about. Every group of hunter that was sent the fewer of them had come back and if they did return they were torn to shreds barely hanging on a thread.

Soon the men were in fear and spoke about that powerful curse his body covered with markings like a tiger. Pricing four red eyes like a demon and sharp large black claws with the control of flames. You wanted to see him for yourself to prove that these stories were real. You knew these kinds of things had to be dealt with with action or respect if you want to live.

The hunters saw you as a good prize for the beast to have so you were sent into the forest to find his shrine. A trap for the weretiger. As you trailed along the dirt path hearing the wind through the trees making them creak. You felt as if you were being watched and hearing noises around you with only bits of moon light that shined through clouds to guide the way. Hearing rustling around you and the forest go quiet  making you feel uneasy. Then a roar of a beast rumbled through the trees making your blood run cold. It must be him. With no time to waisted you ran down the path trying to find somewhere to hide then you kicked something tripping over whatever you kicked and landing on the ground.

You groaned in pain and sat up hearing a baby cry. Confused why there was a child out here thinking the so called weretiger had taken it. You went over seeing the baby boy sitting dressed in a black onesie and a tiger tail behind him thinking it was some sick joke to put it on him. Picking him up into your arms getting a closer look to see his pink hair with some brown on the back of his head. He begin to cry and tried to call out saying da. Your heart broke and held the baby close as you ran trying to get away from the sounds of roaring. Picking up the pace then heard branches break and a loud thud behind you. You looked behind you to see glowing red eyes on a large figure in the shadows. As the figure came into the moonlight you saw the beast.

Four eyes that glowed red and black markings on his face was all you could see before you took off running. The baby cried and tried to squirm out of your arms. "No no don't go. It's ok I got you." The weretiger got closer to you and tried to grab you but you ducked into some shrubs going a different direction. As you ran through the trees you found the shrine. Fuck you just ran straight in to his domain. A roar came behind you as he jumped through the trees and stopped with a growl, you knew you were trapped now.

The baby squirmed in your arms as you pulled out a dagger probably not even bigger enough to do damage to him. "Get away from us." You knew this beast could kill you. He is a weretiger, a cursed man that turns into a beast with fire power. "Da!" The baby reached towards the beast and you felt his tail curl around you. 

In shock and horror hearing the baby call this beast dad and his little tail move. You just kidnap the weretigers child "This is your kid?" He let out a loud growl, you looked seeing him more clearly as the clouds moved from the moon, the light shining on him. 

The black striped marking along his bare chest and face. Four red eyes glowing like the men said they did. He is big and deadly , fluffy tiger tail moving behind him and his pink hair with tiger ears laid back. You stared at him a bit longer then to the baby and set him down. You watched the baby ran over to the beast with a giggle wiggling his tail. The weretiger leaned down to look at his child checking if he was safe. 

You had so many questions no one knew about a baby. He has a family?  If so, where were they? How did a monster like him get a woman and have a child? He growled and got on all four stalking closer to you. Feeling your heart race and pointed the dagger to him then looked at the baby seeing him waddle walk along his dad. Did you have the will to hurt him and leave his child alone?

Tossing the weapon down on the ground making up your mind. You couldn't do it not with the baby around. If you hurt that little boy you will be more of a monster than his dad. Animals that humans deemed dangerous and killers have families and if curses and beasts can have a family what is the difference. He looked at the dagger then to you showing his teeth with big fangs. "I don't want to hurt you. I won't tell them about the baby." He chuckled and spoke "you will still die."

Your eyes widened with fear and your heart raced. Did he just talk? He can speak?! He was about to charge at you but then he roared in pain and looked at his side seeing an arrow. The hunters still followed you here after all that. You came out here to track where he lived, not lure him out to be killed. Another arrow shot at him making him roar and the baby cry. The beast pulled his son behind him getting pelted with more arrows he ripped them out then moved an arm casting a wall of flames where they hid in the tree line. You could hear screams coming from where the flames burned. He took a step back knocking over his son making him cry and squeal.

"Stop there is a baby!" The beast let out a roar blocking out your voice. You took your chance to help him for now to protect his son. Maybe doing this good deed he will let you go. Quickly you ran to the baby and picked him up into your arms getting him away from the scene. You heard and growl as you turned to see the four eyes stare at you with a death glare. "I will keep your baby safe just go kill them. You can trust me."

Keeping the boys face against your chest trying to calm his crying as his dad looked at you then turned his attention back to the hunters seeing them run out from the forest. You turned you body away shielding his son from the gory mess. All you could hear was sounds of people screaming, the roars from him, and the feeling of the sorcerers power.

The baby cried as you rocked his little body in your arms to calm him. Everything went quiet for a moment then you heard heavy footsteps stalking up behind you. You could feel the hair stand up on the back of your neck as you turned to see him towering over you with blood on his body. "Da." The baby reached to his dad as you lifted him up to the beast. He took him into one arm then growled at you and moved his other hand to hit you on the head. The force of his hand was enough to knock you out.

Your eyes opened a blur vision of a warm yellow light filled your view as you turned away from it you heard a giggle. You sat up rubbing your eyes feeling that you were tucked in a soft bed. After your vision cleared you saw the room but then saw the baby boy sitting in front of you. He smiled and crawled towards you as you smiled back at him and said "hello little one." Then you saw his little tiger tail wiggled behind him. Everything of your memory of what happened a while ago came back and eyes widen in shock. Where is the father?

"Where is your mother?" The baby looked at you confused. "Where is dad?" The baby looked back behind him as your eyes followed to the shadows and saw glowing red eyes but only two. You froze as the baby giggled. "What do you want here? Why did you come? You better give me a good reason not to kill you right now."

Hearing his deep husky voice sent shivers down your spine. "They sent me here to find your home. And I was supposed to report back. I did not know they followed me." "How do you expect me to believe you human. You hunters and sorcerers have done nothing but try to kill me and my family." You gulp hearing the anger lace in his voice. "I didn't know you had a family. No one has said about a child. Please I won't tell anyone. I was not here to kill you." 

He darkly chuckled and said "well its a shame that I am here to kill you. Your life is meaningless. Another filth in the world that is only here for war and to kill everything in sight. Including the innocent life you human have taken from me. So why should I let you live tell me brat why I should I let you live!" He growled as you looked at the baby then reached out to pet his tail then his father snapped at you. "Do not touch him!" 

You watched the figure walk closer staring into his eyes then as he stepped into the lantern light. Seeing a man with the same pink hair like the beast but human. Only tattoos along his jaw and his normal eyes are blue and dressed in a white kimono. He was handsome and it made your heart stop. How was this a tiger beast? He looked to his son, seeing him crawl over wiggling his tail. "You really want to kill me in front of your kid."

"You have a smart mouth on you don't you.  I can give you a chance to run while I put my son to bed. If I catch you. You're dead." He picked up his son then walked away as you panicked on what to do. Should you run and live? But he would have killed you if he really wanted you dead and why did he bring you here after he knocked you out?

You were spending so much time thinking he came back still seeing you there in the bed. "What you want a quick death." "Why did you bring me here?" He looked at you then his gaze moved away from your form. "I am not sure why myself. But I guess I do owe you a safe return since you protected my son even when you saw him like me. What is your name?" You gave him a look at the question and told him. "Hmm what do the people of your town call me. Beast. Were tiger. Monster. Demon. Cause I have a name ryomen sukuna. To you it's just sukuna."

You nodded looking to him and said "honestly they call you all of the above but glad to know you are somewhat human and still have respected thoughts. No one knows about you having a family. And when I saw the baby it broke my heart that we are trying to kill you by making him alone with no parents and they will not hesitate to kill him too. It's not right. Why would I want to destroy a family? I will be more of a monster than you. So I chose to protect your son. It's not like I can go back they will see me as a traitor."

Sukuna looked at you and let out a sigh and said "fine I guess you can stay here till I find a place for you to stay away from me. But how do I know I can trust you. To live beside my family." You shrugged looking around. " You can kill me easily and I guess I can be your housekeeper." He strode his way over to you then quickly grabbed your left wrist making you yelp and try to pull away but he brought your hand to his mouth. You watched in horror and he showed his cat fangs then bit into your ring finger.

You yelled feeling a burn then he covered your mouth telling you "quiet darling you will wake the baby." After the pain subsided he let go of your hand. You pulled it away from him seeing a black band around your finger like a ring. "That is a mark of me. I can sense you wherever you go. I can sense when you try to do harm to my family. Your blood is only mixed slightly with my tiger curse. No use for running now sweet heart. You made your deal with me not you have to keep it or else I might just have a meal." 

Your heart raced and hand shaking as he laughed. "Dont worry not enough poison for you to turn, that takes a lot out of a person to handle that power. You can have this room. If you chose to stay. Its not like you can go anywhere else. If sorcerers see you they will see the tigers blood and instantly kill you. So you are stuck here forever till your last breath. if you want to die early then go ahead and run."

Sukuna turned his back to you sliding the door open and said "I will have someone bring you clothes and a tour in the morning if you last that long. Good luck, brat." He closed the door and walked away hearing his evil laughter. You are screwed and stuck here. It shouldn't be that bad, maybe.

In the morning you were woken up hearing someone walking around your room. You turned to see what looked like a woman or man with white hair and a red spot on the back of their head. "My name is uraume. Sukuna had sent to give you some clothing and show you around the shrine." You saw the clothes folded on the edge of the bed then look to them. "Are you male or female?" "Male, you better hurry, sukuna can be impatient." He left then you got up looking at the clothes then got dress seeing the black kimono that was given to you. 

Soon you walked out seeing uraume and followed through the shrine. Seeing the garden, all the colors of flowers and trees throughout the outside between the buildings. You didn't know he had multiple buildings behind the wall that fenced around close to his home. You followed into the kitchen area where sukuna agreed to let you cook things for yourself and him. Showing you the cleaning closet where they had all the supplies to clean his shrine. 

Uraume gave you more clothing to wear to feel more comfortable. Following him through the building your eye had caught sukuna out in the garden in his kimono. You stared at him then saw him carrying his baby boy, watching the baby reach for a flower. A smile appeared on your face seeing them as both their tiger tails wagged. So much for the stories of the were tiger being nothing but a killer and monster that shows no mercy who steals women and children. 

Now you see him in a different light, seeing him in his natural state and in his home. This was nothing from what you were told everything was a lie. "Is something wrong y/n." "Its just everything I was told about sukuna and what I heard is the things he did was evil and he was killer a monster who ate people. But i am here now seeing him with his baby and it breaks my heart to think that if he was killed." Uraume looked at you and said "you care for him? Are you not afraid of him? he can kill you."

You looked at him and sighed saying "I am afraid but I am sure I will get over it. And I care for him I guess only because he has that cute little baby. What is his name?" "Yuji itadori named after his mother." You smiled and said "I would love to see the woman who was able to tie down a beast like sukuna." He frowned and said "my lord's queen is not around anymore. The hunters had gotten to her."

You covered your mouth then looked at sukuna and yuji seeing him smile at his son playing with a flower he pulled from the plant. "I am sorry I didn't know. My apologies." Uraume nodded and said "it took him time to let go. After he slayed the entire village and burned it down to take revenge of the people who killed his wife." You looked at him in shock then said "wait was it the village near the lake passed a flower field?" He confirmed with a nod and your blood went cold that was your town. Those hunters were from there. You needed to talk to him and tell him where you are from, but first you just need to do what you need to.

A few days went by and you did the cleaning around the building making sure everything was nice and neat but then your body ache. When it was feeding time you made some food for yourself while uraume cooked as well for sukuna. The other chores you did was go outside and check the garden to water the plants and clean any leaves out of the kio pond. Sukuna would sometimes watch you from afar seeing you doing as much as you could to not get kicked from his home.

You felt his eyes stare and when you looked at him he would snarl and look away then leave.  One day you walked through a hall and heard little baby giggle and pats of feet. You looked to see little yuji running laughing  then ran over to you. He went behind your legs hiding. You smiled then heard big bad sukuna walk towards you and grunted. "Little brat, where did he go? Did he run down here?" Your eyes looked down to the floor as his eyes followed and saw his sons little tail wiggle. A giggle left you as sukuna walked quietly over to you.

You watched him and froze seeing him smirk and sneak around you then grabbed his son making him squeal. Sukuna lifted yuji up givin him a grr and said "I caught you now you need a nap." You laughed looking at sukuna then yuji reached out to you. Sukuna turned him away from you not wanting you to be near his son. Which you understand his reason for not trusting you fully. 

Though you have been here for almost three weeks and you have not turned on him like he thought. You have also been helping uraume with chores and cooking he thought you the foods and drinks sukuna liked best. Now it was finally your turn to go and bring him his food and drink in his throne room.

As you walked through you noticed some ox skulls decorating outside the room. When you went in he was sitting inside of a small shrine. As you walked closer you saw the little bundle of joy in his arms, yuji sleeping. You stayed quiet and smiled then set the tray down looking at the baby. "Yuji is very cute and looks just like you." Sukuna looked at you then said "I am assuming uraume told you his name. Dinner smells nice." "It was something my mother made for me sometimes. Using herbs from our garden that you just so happen to grow here. Hope you like it."

It was silent for a moment then you broke it with questions. "Sukuna, your wife. I am sorry that the people in my village had killed her. I don't deserve to be here but I want to make it up to you. I want to help and give you the respect you deserve." Sukuna looked at you and growled deeply his eyes turning viscous. "It was your town. So you are the last surviving flesh from that damn place. I knew I should have killed you. I don't need your pity!"

He growled at you, causing yuji to squirm and start to cry. Sukuna shook him and held him close to his chest. "Get out of my sight and do not ever speak of her again. I don't want your tongue to taint my wife, nothing of her is to leave your mouth or I will cut your tongue out. You got that. You are lucky I let you stay."

"Sukuna I am sorry I just want you to be better. I want to stay here. Even if it feels lonely I love it here better than being at the towns seeing the death that occurs there because the sorcerers keep marking random people they don't like as curses." Sukuna growled again and said "just get out and leave me alone you are disturbing my peace with my son." You respected his wishes and let out a sigh and left his throne room. Damn it you should have just stayed quiet.

After the short talk with him you felt bad for bringing up bad memories. Now he was avoiding you, hissing and growling at you a lot more now whenever you got close. Did he hate you that much? Why not kill you already? Walking through the garden you remembered that sukuna loved spider lilies. So you started to head out of the gates but stray too far, all for collecting some lilies that grew in the area. You started to leave the bundles of the flowers at his bedroom door just to show your thanks. Little did you know he brought them into his room with a smirk.

The following days his home was starting to have a dark presence over it like something was going to happen. Uraume warned you to stay away from sukuna because a full moon was one day away. He also told you during the moon do not ever enter the abandoned tiger shrine in the back it was not a place to be. Sukuna had disappeared the whole day before the night of the full moon and you worried. Uraume took care of yuji while his father was gone, who knows what. You worried and wanted him to be home safe.

Night of the full moon even if there was bright light that shined on his home it still felt dark and unfriendly. Everyone was gone even uraume and yuji it was just you alone to attend to the buildings. But then you heard the cried of yuji coming from the garden. Your heart raced and mind filled with worry as you ran out calling to the baby. You then saw him sitting on the ground under the moonlight but he had tiger ears, his tail more fluffed, and a patch of tiger stripes along his back then when he looked at you his eyes like a cats but red like his fathers.

You went to him but he cried and turned away then ran off on all fours as you chased after him telling him to come back. This was crazy him being in that form being a baby was no issue he moved like a house cat. You followed him through the throne room and out through a hidden door leading to another area. The abandoned shrine was old with claw marks, nothing growing it was just dead. Yuji ran inside as you quickly chased him but as soon as you went through the entrance everything went quiet.

Your heart raced as fear set in not know what was happening until you hear a deep loud monstrous growl. Yuji cried and let our a baby tiger meow. "Yuji come on let's go back home. Its not safe for you here." As soon as you went to pick up yuji into your arms a loud crash came from behind you. Turning around quickly your heart dropped and blood went cold. It was sukuna but he didn't look like him.

Four arms, two large tiger tails, his four eyes, ears on his head and a patch of stripes just like yuji with all his black markings. "Sukuna?" You said his name with a shaky voice but then he roared at you showing large teeth and swiped a clawed hand at you. You yelled about getting hit and landed on the floor of the shrine and dropping yuji. The baby cried as sukuna went after you again. Motherly instincts took over as you picked up yuji and ran but sukuna pounced into your way crashing into the wall.

You ran a different direction until you heard metal chains dragging around. Sukuna chased you around the room clawing and snapping his jaws at you and roaring. You breathed hard trying to yell for sukuna to stop but then you tripped landing onto your back holding yuji. He cried in fear then you looked to see sukuna with blood red cat eyes crawling on all limbs stalking towards you both. Tears filled your eyes feeling the sting from his claws on your arm that slashed you open. Your own blood soaking you and some on his son.

You started to back away, keeping yuji close. "Sukuna stop its me and your baby." Sukuna growled and drooled from his mouth with each pat on the floor from his hands and feet. He wants to kill you and there is nothing stopping him. You turned you back to him just as he was about to pounce with a roar and closed your eyes protecting his son from the attack. A sound of chains being tugged sukuna grunted and fell onto his stomach.

Looking over to see him trying to lunge at you but you noticed a chain around his neck with seals keeping him from going any further. Relief washed over you and began to cry holding yuji who was still crying out loud. Sukuna roared and tried to get at you both claws digging into the floor scraping it. "Stop please stop. Its us sukuna." He didn't care he was to blind in this state as you cried yuji whimpered and said "ma ma".

Yuji hid into your chest as you held him and heart beaten fast with fear and worry. You hugged yuji looking at sukuna still hearing the baby cry for his mother and held onto you as if you were his mom. Sukuna looked at you both then to his son letting out a growl. Yuji looked at his father and put out a little hand saying "da, ma." Sukuna bare his fangs at the baby as you pulled yuji away into your arms making him cry again. "Sukuna how dare you do that to your son. That is fucking cruel. Snap out of it ryomen. This is your family. Stop it!"

Tears streamed down you face as sukuna saw a flash of his wife in your position. He remembered this all before when he tried to attack his own wife and hurt her the same way holding their son and her yelling at him. Sukuna felt his heart twist in pain as he backed away from you and ears went down in shame. His whole demeanor changes from aggression to sorrow. Sukuna turned away and laid down with his back to you. Your heart felt heavy and you could feel the brokenness of him. All he has is yuji the last remembrance of his wife. The love they made was whimpering and shivering in your arms.

"Yuji its ok. I got you. I am here. I will keep you safe both me and your father." The night was slowly turning into early morning as sukuna was calming down more enough for you to walk over to him. "Sukuna?" You got closer to him and pressed your hand to his back making him growl and jump a bit startling you then yuji begin to cry again. You tried rocking yuji but it didn't work until sukuna turned to you make you move away in fear. "Da." 

Sukuna looked to his son, seeing him hold out a hand. He leaned down putting his face to yujis little hand and licked it letting out a purr. Soon yuji fell asleep in your arms after touching his fathers face and feeling his love. Sukuna looked at your eyes then gazed at your arm seeing the wound bloody and festering. He moved closer as you froze then felt his tongue lick over the wound numbing the pain. You could hear purrs from him then watched him get closer to you. 

There was a padded mat on the floor as sukuna leaned over to drag it closer to you both. It surprised you when he put an arm around you and pulled you with him onto the mat and laid down curling his body around you. Just like a cat protecting their family with his head resting on your thighs and you back against his legs with one of his arms still around you. Even though it was cold you still felt warm being so close to him. Still holding a sleeping yuji you watched sukuna stare at you. You moved a hand to pet his head giving him a look of sorrow and care still feeling heart broken, all he wants is comfort.

Soon sleep took over you and cuddle against the warmth of his body while he watched over you and his son. He let out a heavy breath from his nose then begin to purr. It was a surprise to him how comfortable you felt around him enough to just fall asleep with his son in your arms. After a few minutes he fell asleep just before the sun had come out, changing him back to normal. His arms are still around you, keeping your body against him while you sleep.

Thank you for reading. Iets see how sukuna will react later with the reader. All love is appreciated!

go to chapter2

master list for Halloween au/ kinktober

master list for stories

#sukuna #ryomen sukuna #jujutsu kaisen #sukuna x reader #yuji itadori #ryomen sukuna x reader #jjk x reader #yuji x reader #itadori x reader #sukuna x you #sukuna x y/n #ryomen sukuna x you #weretiger sukuna x reader #true form sukuna x reader #true form sukuna #yuji baby #kinktober #kinktober 2022 #halloween au

[harunovella]

embers of a fire ; c.k.

synopsis: you loathed him, you despised him... and you couldn't even truly understand as to why. it was superficial, overly judgmental of you to hate choso kamo... however, a class project forces you to spend time with him. little did you know, the man you couldn't swallow, would be the one man you'd never want to leave your side.

cw: fem!reader, snobbish/holier-than-thou!reader (but she gets better okay!), emo skater boi!choso, college au, enemies (?) to lovers, reader's parents are the source of her bitchiness/aka terrible parents, big bro!choso/lil bro!yuji, kissing, slight angst, love confessions, smut (good ol oral w fem receiving, fingering, no condom...), srry if I miss any! MDNI!

wc: 16k+

an: thank you for 100+ followers! I forgot to announce it when I posted my reiner fic a few weeks ago.... but anyway! okay this is super long and I was considering breaking into two parts but yall are real champs and can def read 16k words lmfao (if not, just yknow like it and finish reading it later). i've got the hots for most of the jjk men and I am OBSESSED with emo goth boy!choso so here you go! title inspo comes from this PHENOMENAL song! enjoy xo

How does one make the most popular and loved girl on campus turn her bright-white, toothy smile upside down into a grimace of pure malice? Pair her up with the loner, emo, goth boy of course!

It was your sophomore year of college which meant getting rid of the same ol' prerequisites everyone and their mother must take during their undergrad. You flew by those classes with phenomenal grades, best of the best, one of the top of your class—and that was a ton of students to compare yourself to. After all, you came from a legacy, a bloodline who (all before you) attended the same university. Hell, there was a hall named after your clan. You were that person. Everyone wanted you or to be you. And you held your head high with the upmost confidence knowing this.

Except there was that one guy... the only person who knew how to get on every single one of your nerves, under your smooth and well maintained skin—Choso Kamo. If anyone else were watching from the outside in, they'd say the man did nothing wrong other than exist and breathe the same air as you, but somehow that irked you.

Everything about him irked you.

From the baggy, dark clothes he wore—shirts two sizes too big and jeans so loose with tears you weren't sure if he did them himself or if it was the style—to the dumb tape (tattoo? you weren't sure) across his nose. The endless amounts of piercings on his ears, septum, and (yes, you somehow managed to notice) his tongue. The god awful tattoos that peeked out from the loose sleeves of his tees when he wasn't wearing a jacket... to the chipped black nail polish on his fingernails and the many odd hairdos he did with his long hair.

Yeah, everything about him rubbed you the wrong way. Especially when he felt the need to skateboard everywhere he went on campus and nearly crashing into you multiple times.

It didn't help that he hung out with two other wackos—one being a pot head who had crackhead energy and the other always wearing the creepiest of grins and smirks as if he were plotting murders in his head.

God, Choso gave you the worst vibes. Of course he'd be assigned to work with you on a project for your Intro to Psychology class. It was a whole get to know someone better assignment that felt so kindergarten. Writing up a report relating to the lessons learned while also becoming friends with someone you didn't know? Hell, that was not going to be you.

You squirmed in your seat at the announcement, rubbing your forehead and sighing. Almost begging Professor Yaga to switch you with anyone... absolutely anyone.

"Don't worry so much," Utahime said as she poked your arm gently.

"I don't get why you're so bothered by his existence," Yuki laughed from behind you, tugging at your hair that sat almost perfectly down your back. "He's kinda hot with that emo vibe he gives off."

"Oh, god," Mei Mei rolled her eyes as she sat on the opposite side of you. "You have such poor taste in men. Bet he has no money."

"Mei Mei," Utahime sighed. "I can switch with you, I've got that knucklehead Satoru as my partner," she nudged her head back in the direction of where the man sat—nearly surrounded by girls fawning over him not so discreetly in the middle of a lecture. You looked over and scrunched up your nose. Wasn't like you had anything against him, actually, he was pretty intelligent and was at your level... he just was a bit too chaotic and always had a flock of girls following him around. It was quite annoying.

"It's fine," you huffed, nearly sinking into your seat before you straightened your back. "Yaga wouldn't allow it anyway. He's stubborn. I'll just... have to... get through it."

"Atta girl," Yuki patted your head as she leaned her chin on her other hand. "And while you're at it, give me his number. I'll gladly snatch him out of your hands once it's all over."

"Doubt I'll be getting anything out of him besides what's needed for the project," you shook your head as you shut your eyes, momentarily meditating to embrace what was to come. Opening your eyes and peeking over your shoulder to spot the man you were paired with, perched in the corner of the auditorium with his focus elsewhere, you cringed. He looked unbothered, completely uninterested and deadpan. He was slouched back in his seat, pen bobbing in between his fingers as his other arm draped over the empty seat beside him. It was then you noticed one of the two delinquents he hung out with was missing, leaving him alone with a talkative Mahito that had been bothering some poor kid beside him about god knows what. Just as you were about to look away, Choso's eyes shifted to meet yours, expression still barren, earning an eye roll from you before you turned your focus back ahead.

"Remember, this will count as 50% of your grade as the remaining 50% depends on how well you do on your exams and attendance. Don't miss class like a certain Getō did," Yaga spoke up. "Class dismissed."

"You know what I want to know?" Yuki started as your group of friends began gathering their things. "Why is it that Suguru and Mahito thought it was a good idea to get stitches as tattoos? Maybe that's what Choso is hiding under the nose tape."

"I thought they drew it on themselves?" Utahime furrowed her eyebrows.

"From what I've heard, they both lost a bet to Choso and had to get those god awful tattoos," Mei Mei spoke as she brushed some of her hair over her shoulder.

You, however, were in your own world. Their conversation went in one ear and out the other as you constantly found yourself stealing glimpses of Choso, annoyance clear in your expression. Anyone but him, really... Why did you have to be paired with him? You probably would've taken Suguru instead if he hadn't skipped. He used to be somewhat normal from what you remember. Back when he was best friends with Shoko and Satoru. You weren't sure what happened there but, to be fair, you didn't care much. Satoru was in his own world, enjoying the constant ego boosts and Shoko hung out with the medical students. You supposed they all went their separate ways.

Just as you were deep in thought, not realizing where you were staring or what you were doing, a masculine, monotone voice startled you. "If you're so intrigued, just take a picture of me."

Blinking a few times before gasping, you looked over to see Choso had been a few steps higher than you, leaning in to speak before walking past you with an indifferent expression on his face. As if he didn't just insult you, making you seem like you were interested in him. "As if!" You huffed, earning a few looks from your girlfriends. "It'd break my poor camera."

"Good one!" A sudden laugh made you jump again in your spot as Mahito patted your head before following Choso.

Swatting him away before running your fingers through your hair, you glared at the two who walked across the auditorium, towards the exit. "Jerks..." you mumbled before snatching your bag and lifting up your chin.

"They really get under your skin, huh?" Yuki pointed out.

"They're beneath me, that's all." With a wave of your hand and a flip your hair, you held yourself high and mighty before exiting the class. Yeah, you were prissy and a bit obnoxious but, hey, that's what everyone loved about you. And their opinions mattered the most... right?

Choso never understood your hatred towards him. Actually, he didn't seem to care. Plenty of people hated him for whatever pathetic, judgmental reasons—and you probably the same—but there was something different about you. He couldn't quite put a finger on it, but it definitely felt like you were hiding something from him. From everyone.

In all honesty, you had him intrigued. What was it about you that was sounding sirens in his head? You dressed like you were trying to be Elle Woods, in pinks and pastels. You did your hair so neat and perfect—nothing like his chaotic nest. You always held your head high, wore this sweet perfume that was near nauseating. You drove a car he definitely couldn't afford. He was sure you were a spoiled brat of some rich entrepreneur—but he couldn't say you didn't deserve your class spot. Truly, you were intelligent; bright in all ways possible. That, he'd give you credit for. However, your personality? That way of being, so prim and posh? Something wasn't right. As if you were forced to be this way with all the eyes on you.

And maybe that's why he was so "excited" to be your partner for this assignment. He was going to figure it out, what it was that was hidden behind the makeup and hair pins, amongst those designer outfits and manicured nails. Who you truly were, deep inside.

It also didn't help that one day when he was skateboarding around campus to get from point A to point B, he so happened to pass by your car where you were sort of blasting nu metal from an artist he vaguely recognized. All alone, singing—practically screaming—in a secluded parking lot where you believed no one would see you.

Yeah, you definitely were hiding something from everyone. 

Choso departed from Mahito after telling him he was going to stay behind to plan meet ups with you—which, in turn, got some vulgar remark from Mahito. The man with a twisted grin saying how you really needed a good lay and that he hoped Choso would be that. Choso, who was very used to Mahito's unfiltered mouth, didn't even bat an eyelash, just dismissed his friend and leaned against a wall.

"Mei Mei and I gotta split, we have to meet up with Shoko," Utahime spoke as you and your group piled out of the auditorium.

"And I've gotta go tutor Todo!" Yuki waved as she turned the opposite way, leaving you on your own. You didn't mind, wasn't like you didn't have a friend—or at least an acquaintance—in every corner. Actually, you were more than likely going to call up Kiyotaka to see if he wanted to meet you in the library for your weekly study sessions as you both were taking an economics class.

However, that thought went out the door when your focus landed on your beloved goth. In all his emo glory, leaning against a wall with one door propped up against it, you couldn't help but eye him from head to toe. Now that he was standing, you could truly see how big his shirt was on him and how much he really loved the color black. You were amazed he wasn't wearing black lipstick to top it all off. Maybe that was crossing the line for him. Who knows.

Realizing you were staring for much too long—and probably blocking the doorway—you sighed and approached him. "Let's get this over with."

Lifting his eyes from his phone as he scrolled through his socials, meeting your own—disinterested—pair, Choso stood straight with a huff before speaking, "it won't take us one hour to complete this assignment. We have weeks worth of work to do."

"So?" You then crossed your arms.

"So... miss top of her class, you can't half-ass this work. No matter how much you hate me," he said with tired eyes—a look he always carried. You wondered if he ever slept. He wondered if you still had your little heavy metal sessions.

The two of you stared at one another for longer than you should've. You let out a small scoff before rolling your eyes, "whatever. We can meet up for an hour daily. I think that'll be my limit for how long I can endure your demonic aura."

Eyeing you as you had turned your head to the side stubbornly, a small excuse of a laugh left his lips, "I'm not into satanism. Don't worry, Barbie doll, I'm not going to sacrifice you to some nonexistent deity."

Twitching at the nickname he gave you, you sighed and straightened your posture. He knew how to irk you. "Sure, whatever. Then why do you wear upside down crosses?"

"It's for the aesthetic, obviously," he said as if you should've known that. "Same reason why you love to wear those big pearls on your ears, or that scarf with that plaid pattern. Or even those red bottom heels," Choso listed as you found your cheeks heating up. Was he keeping tabs on you? Was he paying the much attention to what you wore? And why were you blushing?! "You call that fashion, I call this fashion," he said as he flicked the earring that dangled from his right ear.

"Creep," you mumbled before reaching into your bag and pulling out a small journal. Removing the pen from it and writing down something, you tore the piece and folded it neatly before handing it over to him, dropping it into his palm as he extended his hand out. "That's my address. Don't go about stalking me and seeing what I'm wearing. Be there at 8PM, no later. We can do this every Monday through Thursday for one hour. Don't bother me from outside that one hour. Got it?"

Looking at his palm, then down at you, he slid it in his back pocket before answering, "sure."

"Perfect! Now you can leave me be. And stop noting what I wear, loser," you stuck your tongue out before walking away. Yeah, you were mature. It just didn't help that you needed to get out of there, and fast. For some reason, your face felt hot and your heart was racing. You were afraid you were going to start stuttering if you stayed any longer. Why was he so nonchalant? And, damn, why did he smell so good?! You weren't even trying to sniff him, but his cologne knocked right into you. Also, why the hell was he so observant of what you wore? He had no right!

As if.... you weren't the same towards him.

He didn't need to know that.

8PM on the dot. You heard someone knock on your front door, knowing very well it was Choso. You were home alone that evening—as you almost always were as your parents were too busy to focus on their only daughter. You were in the midst of tidying your room—making sure nothing too secretive was lying around—before you made your way downstairs, and to your front door. Sucking in a deep breath and forcing your best scowl, you opened the front door.

In all honesty, the hours that lead up to Choso's arrival were nerve wracking. You weren't sure why. Nothing out of this world, wasn't like he was anyone impressive. Yet you put more effort into your look than you should've for just lounging in your home and working on an assignment. You told yourself it was just how you were. You always looked your best, even at home. Even when you were in those little, pink shorts and an oversized sweater with a cartoon character on it that made you look smaller. It was the first thing Choso noticed when you opened the door—besides the fact that you had subtle makeup and your hair in two little space buns... reminding him too much of his own hairdo.

But, he knew better than to point that out. You'd chew him out.

"Still living with your parents?" He pointed out, though you were sure it wasn't a question and rather a statement.

"So?" You narrowed your eyes. "No point in living in the dorms when I live close to the university. Not everyone lives in a shoe box for an apartment," you crossed your arms as Choso simply blinked.

"And you know where I live because—"

"I— I don't!" You blushed. "I just assumed!"

A subtle grin on his lips as he stood at your door, one hand gripped on the strap of his backpack while the other was deep in the pocket of his grey sweats. So he did own a color outside of black? "And I'm the creepy one."

Snapping your eyes up from the spot they had landed on—definitely not the outline of his dick in his sweats—you hissed, "shut up."

"Can I come in? Or are we going to just stay here and banter?" He asked as you sucked in a deep breath, taking a step to a side and gesturing for him to enter. Without hesitation, he did so. Eyeing his surroundings. The formal living room with modern couches and decor, a dining table and several art pieces hung about. A few framed family photos spotted on the coffee table. It was quite... minimal for a home with a family. Much too clean and pristine. He was starting to understand why you were the way you are.

"Do you want... water or something," you grumbled as you offered, noticing how Choso was curiously studying your home.

"Nah, I've got my own bottle in my bag," he said before spotting your staircase. "Where're we gonna do this?"

Sucking in a deep breath, you pointed upward, "my room." Leading the way towards and up the stairs, you stopped on the second step before turning to look down at him, "don't even think about stealing anything or taking photos. Got it?" You pointed at him as he lifted his hands up in defense before you hummed, turning and treading up the steps.

"I was thinking about stealing one of your panties, but now that you say that—"

"Ugh, gross!" You exclaimed, shaking your head as your steps became stomps. "I wouldn't even doubt it..."

Slightly grinning to himself as he followed you, Choso came to a stop at your doorway as he eyed your bedroom. It was exactly as he expected. Pink... so pink... pink and white with cute things everywhere. Yet, so organized and cleaned up. Like... an unused children's room. This can't possibly be your happy space. So many plushies stuffed on your bed? Sanrio decorations on your desk? A vanity filled with endless makeup products? Well, maybe it was your happy spot. But... it felt like this was some experimental room you were tossed in and put under supervision to see if they could make you the perfect girl.

There had to be something hidden amongst all the bubblegum decor. Something that hinted to the real you.

"Do I sit in all those or in that..." Choso pointed at your bed covered in plush toys or your pink bean bag that sat on a white, fluffy rug. God, how could you even breathe in here?

"You can sit here," You corrected, pulling out your desk chair before you sat in the sea of teddy bears, somehow not disrupting the layout. As if there was a spot specifically for you. "You've got one hour, emo boy."

"Right," Choso sighed as he settled into the white chair.

Lifting your eyes from your laptop as you had flipped it open, you couldn't help but stifle a laugh. He stuck out of your room like a sore thumb. So out of place... Like a black rose amongst a bed of pink. For a moment, you thought it was cute. For a moment. "I'll start with the introductions," you spoke up after nearly clearing your throat from words that weren't uttered but thought out.

Reaching into his bag and pulling out his laptop, Choso looked at you for a moment to see you focused on your screen before his eyes darted around your room, looking for anything off. Your mattress, pillow... maybe behind your dresser or underneath your bean bag. Something hidden. You must've kept a secret collection of records somewhere. Maybe even black band tees. "Sure..."

You started asking the basic introductory questions: full name, where you were born, how old are you, what are you studying... so on and so forth. It was child's play. You wondered how Professor Yaga made this assignment so lengthy when it could've been completed with twenty questions or less. You assumed it was something psychological, suited for the class.

Typing out Choso's answers, he then started asking you the same ones, you answering without missing a beat—or making eye contact. "Lastly, what's your favorite heavy metal band?"

Feeling your lips part, you instantly sealed them as you lifted your focus and shot him a look. "That so is not a question!" You exclaimed, glaring.

Looking at you with a subtle smirk, Choso shrugged, "last one is a freebie for the introduction. You asked me why I am so emo, so I thought it was fair I asked you something I was curious about."

"First of all, you actually are emo. Second of all, I do not listen to heavy metal music. I have no idea where the hell you pulled that out of," you narrowed your eyes, but Choso only leaned back in the desk chair and sighed. "What?"

"Your little head banging sessions in your car beg to differ," Choso said as you blinked, eyes gradually widening as you instantly tossed your laptop onto your stuffed toys before standing to your feet. "The kitten has claws—"

"I don't know what you are talking about but you need to stop stalking me," you pointed your finger at him.

Lifting his hands up in defense, he sighed, "I don't know why you're being so defensive. If it isn't true, if I'm lying, you wouldn't care. But I'm not lying, I know what I saw. You haven't even denied it."

Clenching your jaw as your glared down at him, you pushed your hand against his laptop and shut it as your other hand settled on your hip, "sure, I listen to alternative music that isn't up to my quote unquote standards when no one is around. Sure, I love to scream and bang my head to release my inner frustrations through heavy metal. However, do you think anyone would believe you if you started spreading word? No, they wouldn't, because that's unlike me. I wouldn't do any of that," you said with your eyes still squinted. "Nice try, Choso."

"I have no intentions on spreading rumors—sorry, facts—about you. Actually, with me being the only one to know this, it means I was right about you," he said, looking up at you with that bored expression he so gracefully wore.

Arching an eyebrow, you leaned towards him, "right about what?"

A small smile appeared on his lips as he sat up, looking you in the eyes, "that you aren't who you seem. That all of this," he gestured to your room, "is nothing but a cloaking device forced upon you to hide who you really are. You're just a poor princess trapped in her tower of pink lies. Tell me I'm wrong."

Eyeing him as you kept your focus locked on his, taking in deep breaths, you nearly bit your tongue off. "You are so wrong."

Choso was not wrong. Nowhere near wrong. Actually, he was burning hot with his assumptions and theories and intuition. You hated that. Yet, you couldn't avoid him. He was your partner and you weren't going to fail an introductory class. Damn that man.

You continued your daily meet ups at your place—sometimes at the library if you knew your parents would be home. Those happened seldom, and Choso didn't even have to ask to know why there was a change in environment. He was well aware your parents would despise him if they saw him. Now a week into your project, Choso was slowly learning more about you, more than what you put out. He was well aware that you had both beauty and brains, he wasn't going to lie, he had eyes. However, he started noticing the little cracks. The holes in you that were created by your own pillars—your parents. They wanted you you be the perfect little girl for them. Since you were the only child, they were so fixated on you and your achievements.

Probably why you had all those trophies from various competitions on a shelf in your home.

You didn't enjoy it, you didn't have to tell him for him to know. He saw it in your eyes whenever you lied and said you had fun competing as a child. (In reality, he was sure you wanted an actual fun childhood.)

It was obvious why you were the way you were. They were carving you out, shaping you the way they wanted. Not how you did.

And Choso was sure, if he pushed hard enough, he'd get you to tip over and break into a million pieces. Pull yourself back together, and bring out a better you. The real you.

Of course, that is once he gets on your good side.

"So how are things with you two?" Yuki asked as the two of you walked along the campus, leaving one of your shared classes. "I mean, you've hardly complained about him since we started working on the project."

Sighing as you held your journal against your chest, you looked off to the side. "He's— He's... there..."

"There?" She asked with a small snicker. "What the hell does that mean? Hey! You still haven't given me his number!"

"I'll give it to you later," you mumbled, looking up at the sky now, eyeing the scattered clouds and the distant birds flying below them.

"Later? Oh! So you did manage to get it, huh?" Yuki grinned, nudging you with her elbow.

"Yeah, a few meet ups in, solely to let him know where to meet up. Can't have my parents seeing him," you said, thinking about the reaction your parents would have if they saw Choso in your room. Oh, how they'd panic. Your father would lose his mind and your mother would—without a doubt—pass out. The thought made you chuckle.

"What's so funny?" The blonde beside you asked, eyeing you with an arched eyebrow.

"Nothing..." you hummed.

"Hmm..." studying you, Yuki then crossed her arms. "So, you've got a crush on him—"

Coming to a complete stop, you turned and eyed her, "excuse me? Repeat yourself? Deranged witch!"

"There she is!" Yuki pointed with a laugh. "For a second I thought I lost you there! You weren't being so bitchy—"

"Shut up," you rolled your eyes, turning back in your spot, continuing to walk. "I do not have a crush on him, where the hell did you get that from?"

"You haven't complained about him once and, well, you are his partner still... you haven't managed to convince Yaga to switch you. And don't give me the whole he won't bullshit, we all know everyone in the faculty and staff adore you. So, what's up? What's got you so... chill? You aren't even fuming like you normally would. C'mon, talk to me. You know I'm the best person to confess to," Yuki grinned with a flip of her hair.

Pinching the bridge of your nose, you shook your head, "there's nothing. We just meet up for an hour, do our work, then go our separate ways."

"So the assignment isn't bringing you two close? I know for a fact it's got 'hime and 'toru fu—"

Lifting a finger, you shook your head, "don't you finish that sentence. Please." Watching her lift her hands up in defense, you shook your head. "He's a hard man to open up. His responses are minimal and almost cryptic. He doesn't speak much when it comes to himself, but he seems very interested in me. Like he wants to unravel me. Creepy in my opinion but... whatever. If it's getting me an A, I'll do whatever."

Watching you wave your hand dismissively, Yuki tilted her head with a small grin, "unravel you, huh? Like... get in your panties—"

A gasp left you as your eyes widened. "Yuki, shut up!" You snapped. "No, it's like— he just wants to get to the deepest bits about me! Not that!"

"Deepest bits, like, having his thick, long, di—"

"I'm walking away now!" You said as you picked up your pace, only to hear her laughing. Yuki knew how to get under your skin, but not in a spiteful way. She just liked to bug you, your reactions were golden, so she could only imagine how you were when you were with Choso.

In all honesty, as much as she loved pestering you for his number, she couldn't help but think... you two would actually be quite the power couple. There was something about opposites attracting that made her swoon, especially when it was her little, preppy, best friend and a very handsome, depressed looking, goth boy. The image of you two being together made her smirk. She needed to do something about it.

Walking towards your car as you let out a huff of annoyance, you pulled your keys out from your bag and eyed your surroundings for a moment. Secluded. Just like how you liked it. This was why you always parked here, towards the back of the campus near the history wing. Not many people ventured this way, it was the perfect hideaway.

Unlocking your car and slipping inside, you set the keys in the ignition and plugged your phone in. Taking in a deep breath as you settled in your seat after tapping your favorite playlist, you started bobbing your head to the music. Then, before you knew it—as the rhythm was flowing through you—you started singing (screaming?) along. You were so into it that you nearly forgot your surroundings. That is until your eyes landed on your favorite loner.

There, standing across the way on the sidewalk with one hand clutched onto his skateboard and the other holding his cigarette in between his index and thumb, was Choso. Watching you with a smirk on his lips. When did he get there? How did you not notice? You weren't even a song into the playlist!

With a huff, you lowered the volume and shoved your door open, not bothering to shut it as you stomped over towards the stoic man. He simply stood there, taking a drag and puffing air as you came up, practically barring your fangs. It was cute to him, you looked like an angry kitten. "You!" You pointed as Choso simply took another drag.

"Yeah," he breathed, watching as you stopped before him, just before the curb as he stood towering before you with the additional inches from the sidewalk.

"Where— Where the hell did you come from?!" You shrieked.

"My mother's—"

"No! I didn't see anyone!" You whined as Choso sighed, taking one last inhale from his cigarette before putting it out.

"What? Bummed someone knows you have little therapeutic head banging sessions?" He slightly tilted his head. It was then you noticed his hair was down, in all it's disarray glory, sat beneath a dark grey bucket hat. He wore a baggy tee again, a plain black one and matching sweats. His feet covered in beat up converse this time around. You were so deep in your studying—gawking—that Choso cleared his throat.

Snapping out of it, you looked up at him again and frowned, arms folded as you stomped a foot pathetically, "what is it that you want from me?!"

"Nothing, really," he shrugged. "Just that you quit being someone you're not. Y'know, for someone who judges others for being their true selves."

Fighting the urge to gasp, you bit your tongue, instead, grabbing his hand and yanking him. You pulled him along to your car, opening the passenger door and nearly shoving him inside. Shutting the door behind you, you then rounded the car and took the drivers seat. With the sound of the car locking, you turned up the volume again and sat there with your arms crossed. Your focus was straight ahead as Choso took a minute to take in his surroundings. Your car—a cute, white, Mini Cooper—smelled like spring days. Nothing out of place, cleaned as if you've never used the car before. You had a little dancing flower on your dashboard and a pink ribbon wrapped around your mirror into a bow. Yet, the music emitting from within did not match the interior.

Eyeing the screen before him, he then leaned back into the seat, recognizing the artist as one he listened to religiously. "So, are you kidnapping me?" He asked, turning his attention ahead, eyes aimlessly gazing around his surroundings.

"No," was all you said before raising the volume up. "I know you won't say anything, no one would believe you anyway." Feeling his eyes on you, you bit your inner cheek before mumbling, "and it's nice... having someone to enjoy this with..."

Seeing the way you stubbornly kept your focus anywhere but on him, Choso couldn't help but tease you, "I think you're finally getting soft on me—"

"Don't get used to it!" You snapped, now looking and pointing at him.

Lifting his hands up in defense, Choso looked ahead once again with a small sigh, "is it okay if you go over my place tonight?"

Blinking, your eyebrows narrowed, "why?"

"It's personal," was all he said, voice lower than before. You couldn't help but frown. Personal? "I can't leave home tonight."

"Oh... Kay..." You trailed, studying him and seeing how his demeanor changed, no longer in a teasing mood. "Fine. Since you were such nice company, I'll allow it."

Rolling his eyes, Choso couldn't help but feel a twitch of a smile grow on his lips, "whatever. I'll text you my address."

"Apartment 310..." you sighed, eyeing the grey door before you decorated in nothing but a peephole and... an odd decoration hanging from the door knob. Something resembling that of a child's creation in arts and craft class. You'd have to ask Choso about that—

The sound of heavy, rapid footsteps and excited yelling was heard from the other side of the door, causing you to lean in with furrowed brows. Did he have company? Or was that a really loud TV? Knocking on the door as you had leaned back and stood straight, you heard the heavy footsteps once again—except this time approaching. Seeing the door swing open, your eyes widened.

"What—" seeing no one before you, no sign of Choso, you tilted your head. "Who—" lowering your focus, a pair of big, bright eyes gazed up at you. A little boy, easily 4 or 5, stood before you with a look of awe. His pink hair was messy—ruffled in different directions, as he wore a hoodie with tiger ears and matching shorts plus white socks covering his tiny feet. "Oh... this must be the wrong place... I'm sorry—"

"Yuji! What did I tell you about opening the door?!" Hearing a familiar voice call out—much more intense than you had ever heard of before, you turned your head to see Choso approaching. However, the sounds of whimpering caught your attention as the little boy—which you now learned was named Yuji—was tearing up. "Oh no... I'm sorry, I didn't—" kneeling before the little boy and lifting him in his arms, Choso rubbed his tiny back. "I didn't mean to scare you. But, please, listen to me, okay?"

"O— kay..." the little boy sniffled.

Watching this all unfold, eyes wide in shock, you shook your head and swallowed. What... just happened? Who was this little boy? And why did the sight before you—Choso being so gentle—make your insides twist? "Umm..."

"Come in," Choso nudged his head for you to follow. You, closing the door behind you, did so. He lead you to the living room (which was really just a couple of steps ahead of you) as he sat on the couch, settling the little boy down and wiping his tears as you slowly sat besides the older man. "You can play for thirty more minutes but you must clean and put away all your toys and get ready for bed after, okay?"

"Mhm!" Yuji nodded his head in excitement, only to turn his head to look at you, gasping as he nearly had forgotten you were there. "Choco, is this your girlfriend?" The little boy asked, suddenly all giddy, causing your heart to skip a beat as your eyes widened. Girlfriend?!

"No, she's just a classmate," Choso clarified as you frowned, slightly offended for whatever insane reason. As if you should be insulted by that! Why did he answer so casually? How was he always so calm?! "Why don't you introduce yourself?"

"Okay!" The little boy exclaimed, taking quick steps to stand before you, "hi! My name is Yuji Itadori!"

Blinking a few times, looking down at his tiny hand as it was extended towards you, you took it in your own and gently shook it. "Hi, Yuji... I'm—"

"I know who you are!" He gasped, saying your name as he pointed at you while jumping. "Yeah! That's you! Choco talks—"

"Okay, Jiji, that's enough, go play with your toys," Choso shooed him as Yuji frowned, then gave the older man a small glare before stomping away, mumbling to himself.

Letting out a small breath, you looked at Choso, "you're a young father... he must look a lot like his mom."

"I'm not his dad," Choso clarified, shaking his head as he was covering his mouth, still processing what Yuji was about to say. With a deep breath, he then leaned back against the couch, "his my little brother. Half brother, actually, but... yeah. I'm his legal guardian."

Eyeing Choso as he had yet to look at you, almost as if he were deep in thought, you simply nodded. This must've been what was personal. His little brother, Yuji. "Oh... I see." Not wanting to press, you opened your bag and pulled out your laptop to get ready for your hour session. Just before you did, you gave him one look, realizing he was still dressed similarly to earlier—hair down, a t-shirt and sweats, but now no sneakers... only socks. Turning back to your laptop, Choso did the same as he lifted his from the coffee table before him, getting straight to work.

Thirty minutes had passed and Choso excused himself for a moment, mentioning how he had to make sure Yuji put himself to bed. As he did that, you continued your work, even if your mind was wandering off to uncharted waters. Thoughts of Choso... Choso being a fatherly figure. Again, it was stirring something unwanted within you. You had to force yourself to think about something else.

That is, of course, until a shadow casted upon you. You looked up, behind you to see Choso looking down at you. A small yelp left you as you gulped, quickly turning your attention away as you noticed Yuji standing beside him—hand in hand with Choso. "Oh?" You blinked as the little boy smiled. You realized he was now dressed in his pajama—a cute, dark blue set, with little animals scattered around it.

"I wanted to say good night! So... good night!" He waved with his free hand.

"Good night, Yuji. It was nice meeting you," you smiled back at him before Choso guided him back to his room. The grin on your lips wouldn't fade away, you had to admit, Yuji was adorable.

The cutest kid you've ever met. Hearing distant mumbling, your curiosity got the best of you as you settled your laptop onto the coffee table and stood up. Quietly walking to the small hallway where the two bedrooms and bathroom sat, you carefully peeked over. Choso was kneeling before Yuji's bed, reading a bedtime story. You could see the little boy was fighting sleep as his eyes fluttered closed. Choso noticed this, too. Standing up and making sure all of the plush toys were surrounding him—the way his little brother liked it—Choso leaned in and kissed his forehead good night before gently caressing his hair.

Your heart was racing. You hadn't noticed it. Forcing yourself to look away and walk back to your spot on the couch, you found yourself nibbling on your bottom lip. Trying to focus on your work, you couldn't seem to get passed the single word you typed out. The images of Choso caressing Yuji's back, wiping his tears, holding his hand... and tucking him in... it made you feel so uneasy. It made your heart race. It made your face heat up.

"Okay, he's asleep," Choso said, snapping out of your thoughts as you clinched. He noticed but stayed silent.

"I can keep meeting you here if you need me to," you said, eyes practically glued to your screen, refusing to look up at him. You knew if you looked him in the eye you'd do something foolish. Probably even blush.

"I normally have a babysitter if he doesn't have his evening karate class... but money has been getting tight," he confessed, causing you to look up at him as he reached for his laptop and sat back down. You couldn't help but feel sympathetic. As much as you weren't fond of Choso—for petty reasons—you could only imagine how much he was struggling to raise a little boy on his own.

"It's okay, you don't need to explain," you said, "I like Yuji. He seems like a really sweet boy."

Looking at you, Choso wore a subtle smirk, "he's my bloodline."

"Whatever," you playfully rolled your eyes. "He's innocent and I like his hair."

"You don't like mine?" Choso slightly tilted his head, letting the strands fall to a side. You couldn't help but smile, shaking your head. "No? Wow. Is it because it's not pink?"

Letting out a small laugh, you reached over to touch his hair without thinking. You wrapped some around your finger, twirling it before letting it fall loose, "it's not so bad..."

"I'll take that as a compliment."

Eyeing one another as a comfortable silence fell between the two of you, you felt your heart begin to race the more you looked at him. Shyly looking away, you cleared your throat. "Let's finish today's work."

Studying you and the subtle blush that tinted your cheeks, Choso nodded. "Yeah."

It was becoming more and more apparent to Choso how much you were softening up to him. Maybe it was because you saw a different side of him after your first visit to his place... or maybe you just wanted to be seen as a saint in little Yuji's eyes. Whatever it may be, you weren't so easily agitated anymore. It caught him off guard when you started giving him small smiles—in which his would subtly reciprocate. He had to test his waters, of course. Maybe you were smiling to someone behind him? But no, it was towards him.

Then, you started inviting him to your little in-car-concerts. He would recommend you music that you'd soon find yourself playing on repeat while alone or in the comfort of your earphones. Other times, you'd recommend him songs in which he'd learn the lyrics to almost the very next day—Choso wouldn't admit it to you, but he kind of wanted you to be impressed. And, you were.

Choso also noticed just how attached his little brother grew to you. Every visit you made for your hourly sessions, you found yourself coming earlier and earlier to spend time with the little boy. He had always asked you to play with him or to watch his favorite movie, but you had told him you couldn't while working on your project, so, of course—in his infinite wisdom—little Yuji suggested you come earlier. And you did.

There was even a routine you started with the duo: helping out Yuji to sleep, even if Choso insisted You didn't have to (you had to, solely because Yuji begged you to... and you did want to, too).

You were... changing, to say the least; and Choso wouldn't complain nor want to stop it.

However, your parents began to notice.

It wasn't as subtle as you thought. You were well aware of the change in demeanor you had. You were nicer to those you once were quite bitchy to. You weren't so stuck up nor snobbish—as Yuki liked to point out—and you were actually associating yourself with others you once saw beneath you.

This... wasn't a good look, at least, not in your parents eyes.

"Why are you always sneaking away?" Your mother had asked. An odd question coming from her when she nor your father were never around. "Are you secretly dating someone?!"

Growing wide eyed, you shook your head. "No? I have an assignment I've been working on with a partner. We meet up together."

"Uh huh," your mother crossed her arms. "Don't think we don't notice these changes," she gestured at your figure. "Your attitude is becoming much too laid back and care free. You aren't on time like you used to be and you are becoming careless with your fashion! Are you on drugs?!"

"Mom! Of course not?!" You shrieked, narrowing your eyebrows at her accusation. "I'm not changing, I'm still me!"

"Yeah? Is that so?" Walking around the kitchen counter and pulling out something, your eyes widened at the sight of your (what once was hidden) vinyl records. "Satanic music!" She waved them as she approached you again, then handing them to your father who stood beside her. "I will not tolerate this!"

Watching your father snap the records, a sharp gasp left your lips as your eyes instantly welled up in tears. "That— That isn't satanic music! That's just music! It was a gift! How could you?!" You cried out as your body trembled at the broken pieces on the ground. A gift Choso had given you during one of your sessions after remembering you had a record player.

"You think we don't know what the hell this is?!" Your father finally spoke, shaking the two pieces in his hands. "You, sneaking around behind our backs?! You probably have been smoking pot in your room—"

"I'm not! It's just music, for heaven's sake—"

"Don't you raise your voice!" Your father snapped as you hiccuped.

"You— You two are being ridiculous! Over music?! You broke a gift someone important gave to me!" You exclaimed, chest heaving as the anger and rage boiled up within you. You were blinded that you hadn't realize the confession you made, too focused on the fact that they had destroyed the practically brand new vinyl you were afraid to touch because you wanted to preserve them. Yet, that went out the window. "All because you're too scared your perfect daughter isn't all about unicorns and rainbows anymore because she's a damn adult! I'm sick and tired of being someone you want me to be that I'm not!"

Hearing them scoff your name, you shook your head and turned to grab your keys, ignoring their yells as you stormed off. You didn't look back, slamming the main door of your home behind you before rushing into your car and speeding off. Your vision was blurred from the endless tears as you continuously wiped them away. You didn't seem to care about speed limits or being pulled over, you just wanted to get away as far as possible.

And as far as possible was at Choso's.

You found yourself crying into his chest the moment he had opened the door. He lead you to his couch—that you grew familiar with—and settled you there before coming back with tissues and water. He wiped your tears as you explained what happened, whimpering along the way as Choso frowned for you. The more he learned about you, the more he knew you were just a bystander of your parents ruthless grip. He was sure the person you had been becoming around him was the woman inside begging for freedom... and to see you cry like this? Sobbing over the gifts he gave you and snap at your parents? His heart was aching. 

At some point, a worried Yuji came waddling in with a plush toy—one you learned to be his favorite—as he handed it to you for comfort. Claiming it made him feel better when he was sad. You thanked the little boy as you caressed his cheek before hugging his tiny body. He couldn't help but stay lingering, sitting beside you in hopes you'd feel better.

"You're welcome to come over whenever you want," Choso offered. "Even if I'm not here, I have a spare key hidden under my front mat. Not wise, I know, but things happen."

Smiling at him as you sipped at the water Choso had handed you, you shook your head, "I couldn't... I don't want to intrude."

"Believe me, you're not," he said, looking you in the eyes with a worried expression. "I rather you feel safe and wanted here than anxious and afraid in what's supposed to be your own home."

Looking down for a moment at the stuffed Spider-Man in your hold, you then looked over at Choso, "thank you."

"You can sleep over!" Yuji exclaimed as he bounced in his spot. "We can watch a movie and—and eat popcorn!"

Looking over at the eager, little boy, you let out a soft chuckle, "okay, Jiji." Seeing him clap in excitement, he pushed himself off the couch and rushed away to his room.

"I'll get you something to sleep in, and you can stay in my bed," Choso stood as you turned your attention to him, watching him walk away. Before you could protest, he waved his hand, "don't worry about it. I've fallen asleep plenty on the couch with Yuji."

Choso's clothes were even baggier on you. The shirt was a dress and the sweats he offered hung so loosely you had to tie them up with a spare hair tie. However, you didn't seem to mind. They were comfortable and they... smelled like him. You hated to admit it, but the times you've got whiffs of him, you indulged. He smelled so good, like fresh laundry. There was a hint of spice, maybe the subtle cologne he used or the possibility that he liked his home smelling like the fall. Whatever it was, it filled your senses as you lied on his bed and it... made you feel safe.

After watching a movie with Yuji—which he chose to be Big Hero 6–you retired for the night. Choso gave you brand new toiletries to use as needed as well as clothes, telling you to feel free and use whatever you needed. It made you feel... wanted. You hadn't felt like this in so long. Sure, your friends were wonderful people, but even then you hadn't felt like this. You couldn't quite describe it, really. Besides the feeling of being noticed and needed, even if it was subtle, there was that thing bubbling within you that only Choso ignited.

Turning on your side and seeing the analog alarm clock on his bedside table, you sighed. It was half past midnight and, for some reason, you couldn't sleep. Maybe it was being in someone else's bed. Maybe it was your parent's words. Whatever it was, it had you getting up and wrapping a throw over your body as you aimed for the living room.

Gently nudging Choso as he seemed sound asleep, resting on his back as he took the entire length (and more) of the couch, you frowned. "Choso..." You whispered.

Mumbling and groaning, the sound made you blush as he peeked an eye, "what is it?"

"Sorry... I can't sleep..." you confessed. "Umm... can you... can you come back to bed with me? Maybe having someone there will make me feel at ease..."

Rubbing his eyes as he sat up, Choso grabbed the pillow he slept with and tossed the blanket over the cushions before following you to his room without a word. Maybe it was because he was half asleep, but he so easily slipped into his bed, lifted the sheets for you to join him, and casually spooned you from behind. You were flustered at first—of course! But then you eased into his warmth with a pleasant sigh as you closed your eyes.

Only to open them at the sound of faint whimpering.

Sitting up, you looked around the room, only to see Yuji standing at the foot of the bed—one arm wrapped around his Spider-Man plush as his other had his tiny hand balled into a fist, rubbing his eye. "Yuji?" You quietly called to him. "What's the matter?"

"Nightmare..." he pouts. "Choco let's me sleep with him when I have them..."

"Oh," looking over at Choso and seeing he was dead asleep, you looked back at Yuji. A soft smile graced your lips before you waved a hand for him to join you. "C'mon, the more, the merrier."

Crawling up to you as you helped settle him in between you and Choso, you pulled the quilt over the two of you before petting his hair, telling him to sleep well. That he was safe.

Just like you.

Morning had come and you woke up to both Yuji and Choso gone from the bed. You went to do your (simplified) morning routine as you washed your face and brushed your teeth. Once exiting the room, you were greeted with breakfast—Yuji happily nomming away as Choso looked as if he were about to leave somewhere.

"Morning," you greeted as Yuji patted the seat beside him—in which a full plate of food sat. "Where you headed off to?" Eyeing Choso and seeing he was in a pair of black jeans and a band tee—with his beloved Doc Marten's and hair in its spiked buns—you tilted your head.

"I've got work," he said. You recalled him mentioning he worked at a record shop (see broken vinyls that were once your prized possession from him). "I have to take Yuji to a family friend to babysit—"

"Oh, let me," you offered. "It's the least I could do. Let it be my thank you," you nodded. "I'd have to get some stuff from my place but I can bring him with me. I'm sure Yuji wouldn't mind."

Nodding his head eagerly, Choso looked at his little brother, then you, "alright, I guess that's okay. I'll have to let Nanami know."

"Nanamin will get why!" Yuji waved his tiny hand. "Choco's pretty friend will babysit! She's now Yuji's best friend!"

"What about Megumi and Nobara?" Choso asked as he leaned over Yuji to steal some of his bacon, earning a swat from the little boy.

"They— They are!" He exclaimed. "But now I have an older best friend!"

Smiling at them, you gave Yuji's cheek a gentle pinch, "I'd happily be your best friend."

"Yay!" He clapped before sticking his tongue out at Choso.

"Okay, okay," Choso waved a hand. "I'll go ahead and put his car seat in your car so you have it ready."

"Okay, thanks," you said as you began to eat. You couldn't help but feel excited to spend the day with Yuji... as odd as that sounded. He was an entertaining little boy and he really seemed to love you like his own blood.

"Okay, Yuji," You said as the little boy gawked at the size of your home, calling it a castle. You showed him around the house, even your backyard, before you made your way up to your room. "I'm going to shower and then we can head back to your home, okay?"

"Okay!" Yuji's muffled voice called out as he had now found himself stuffed in the horde of plush toys on your bed. He couldn't help but toss himself in it the moment he saw them all. You didn't mind, whatever made the boy happy.

"Stay there, alright?" You pointed as he rolled over and nodded, only to spot a pink dog. "Yeah, has your color, huh?"

"Same hair!" He pointed at his head, earning a sweet chuckle from you.

"I'll be quick," at that, you closed the door and took a quick shower. You folded up the clothes Choso leant you and reminded yourself to wash them at his place so your parents weren't suspicious if you left them at home.

Changing into a pair of grey leggings and an oversized, white hoodie that had TOKYO written across the chest in varsity letters, you slipped on socks and exited the bathroom. Just as you reached for a pair of sneakers, you noticed Yuji was knocked out on the plushes. Smiling, you slipped the shoes on, grabbed your tote bag that you filled with your things—plus Choso's clothes—then reached for Yuji and held him against you as he rested against your shoulder.

Careful enough to leave your home and shut the door quietly, you put him back into his car seat and buckled him in before you went for the drivers seat and made your way back to Choso's.

That afternoon was quite busy. You finished up your assignments that were due the following week, did some cooking for lunch that you enjoyed with Yuji, played with him and watched movies, then cooked again for dinner. For the most part, Choso's fridge was filled with a lot of children's food. The occasional fruit and vegetable, too. But a lot of kiddie portions. He truly cared for his little brother, it warmed your heart how attentive he was. How responsible and how much of an effort he put into Yuji's life.

After dinner, you took Yuji for a small walk to get some fresh air and enjoy the sunset. You sat at a park bench for a bit and talked about his favorite TV shows and video games before you walked hand in hand back to his home.

Watching some episodes of a TV show you loved as a kid—one Yuji never knew of—the two of you dozed off on the couch. This was what Choso came home to.

His heart raced at the sight, you with Yuji curled up against you as you shared a blanket. A small smile grew on his lips as he took his shoes off and quietly walked over. Carefully lifting up Yuji, ready to put him to bed—as it seems you had already taken care of bathing, brushing his teeth, and changing him into his pajamas—you squirmed awake. "Good evening, princess."

Sighing, you stretched before sitting up. "Hi."

"You can stay again, if you'd like," Choso offered but you shook your head with a gentle smile.

"I should go home... even though my parents don't seem to care as I haven't received a single phone call or text," you sighed, standing up to gather your things before walking to his front door.

Following you, Choso opened the door for you with his free hand as his other kept Yuji against his shoulder. "Like I said before, you have a place to stay here."

Looking up at him as you felt your heart flutter, you smiled again. A silence washed upon you two as you quietly gazed at one another. Tiptoeing, you gave his cheek a sweet, lingering kiss, before settling back, "thank you."

Eyeing you as his focus flickered between your eyes and your lips, Choso felt himself leaning forward, just about ready—

Feeling Yuji squirm, Choso straightened his posture as you blushed, waving goodbye before exiting his apartment. "Yeah... goodnight, princess..."

"...and then... I kissed his cheek. After that, I could've sworn we would've, you know..." you waved your hand, "kissed..."

"Kissed?!" Yuki exclaimed as you shyly nodded, blushing. You had told her everything from your parents wrongfully snapping at you, to you staying with Choso... up until you left the following day. Which had been yesterday. "Why didn't you?!" She gasped as she leaned towards you.

The two of you sat on a bench out in the main, open courtyard, usually doing this after your shared class before moving onto your next one. "I— I don't know... but, either way, I shouldn't..." you sighed, fiddling with the hem of your dress.

"Why not?" Yuki furrowed her eyebrows.

"Because... it'll never work out. We can't be together..." you trailed before sitting up with wide eyes. "Either way, it's not like I have feelings!"

Narrowing her eyes as she stared at you, Yuki shook her head, "I think you're lying. You wouldn't be this way if you didn't feel anything for him. You've changed, in a good way. You're telling me you stayed in his home, in the same bed... and feel nothing? The fact that you ran to him before thinking of anyone else, like... me?! And then you two almost kiss?! Come on!" She threw her hands up before slumping in her seat. "You've gotta follow your heart, and it's clear what she wants."

Turning your focus away from her, your heart skipped a beat. In the distance, you spotted the man of the hour walking alongside Mahito and Suguru. Swallowing the sudden lump in your throat as he noticed you, you shyly waved with a faint smile as he reciprocated the action.

Grinning at the sight, Yuki nudged your knee with hers, "can't knock it till you try it."

After the incident with your parents, you found yourself showing up at Choso's much earlier than normal. He didn't question, knowing very well you were avoiding your parents, simply welcoming you in (more like Yuji shoving his older brother to a side to hug your legs and shriek your name). You truly have grown to love Yuji more and more after each passing interaction.

You and Choso finished your work earlier than usual, deciding to sit together and watch some TV with Yuji sat in between. Usually, he was playing with his toys or Switch, but he always made time to be with you. Even if he was in the middle of using his brother's phone to FaceTime his two best friends. As you were in the midst of watching comedy reruns, Yuji was in the middle of squealing and laughing, talking loudly as one of his best friends—Nobara—basically met his level of excitement. You had actually met his two best friends a few times after Yuji had them over. You learned that Nobara was like his long lost twin while Megumi was the level headed one of the three. Usually quiet, but every now and then showed his own wave of emotions that almost matched the other two.

"Say hi!" Yuji said as he lifted the phone to your face.

"H— Hi, you two," you waved as you gently pushed the phone back so you could see them properly.

"Hi!" Nobara waved happily, sitting up in her seat and giving you a toothy grin.

"Hello," Megumi shyly waved as you chuckled. Yuji claimed Megumi had a crush on you, but you liked to think he was just timid. (Though, you weren't sure how, when his parents—who you had met that same day you had met him—were the complete opposite of him).

Suddenly with his eyes glued on the TV and practically dismissing his best friends, Yuji pointed, "a festival!" He said, watching the ad that appeared on the screen. "Choco, can we go?" He asked, wide eyes looking up at his big brother while kicking his legs in excitement. "All three of us?!

"Sure, if she wants to," Choso said as he ruffled Yuji's hair before the little boy looked up at you, awaiting your response.

"Oh, of course!" You nodded before bringing the phone back to the little boy's attention. "We can go Friday night." Already distracted by his best friends, you let out a small laugh before looking at Choso who shrugged.

The upcoming days went by like a breeze. To your luck, your parents were away on a business trip (without telling you until your mother's assistant left you a text). You rolled your eyes and didn't seem to care, you were used to being on your own rather than have a set of parents around to raise you. It was something that haunted you during your late night thoughts. However, unlike before, you had two people that made your days seem a lot better. Two people you felt as if you could breathe around and not have to worry about proper etiquette and perfect manners.

Friday had finally arrived and your classes came and went. You had met Choso at his place and carpooled with him after letting Yuki know where you'd be. The girls had made last minute plans to go to the movies but, like the great person she was, Yuki offered to make an excuse for you. No one but her knew how close you had grown to Choso. It wasn't like you were... intentionally hiding it, it was known he was your partner. However, you didn't think it needed to be known. It wasn't like you were a couple.

Now enjoying your time at the festival, playing games together (in which Choso had to help Yuji), eating great food and riding some rides, you had won Yuji a tiger plushy that was the size of him. He was a happy boy, but the smile on his face was wider than you had ever seen. He thanked you profusely as he hugged it tight and decided to name it after you (you didn't mind, it was a cute gesture).

Now seated on the ferris wheel as you eyed the environment around you, Yuji sat in between you and Choso as he watched the fireworks with stars in his eyes. You couldn't help but look at Choso with a gentle smile as he looked at you. Soft gazes being exchanged as you felt your heart race, blushing before the two of you looked away. You hated how fast your heart would beat within your chest whenever the two of you made eye contact. It made your stomach turn each time... Maybe Yuki was on to something when she said listen to your heart. As obvious of advise as it was.

"I had a great night," you said as you were now back at Choso's place, standing before your car as he held a sleeping Yuji in one arm and his giant stuffed tiger in the other. "Thanks for inviting me."

"Don't thank me, thank Yuji," he nudged his head towards the sleeping little boy, causing you to chuckle. "I'm glad you came. I would say it must be lonely going back home, but you must be used to it."

"Yeah, I am," you sighed. "But at least I had fun and I can think about that if I get in my head," you tapped your temple, earning a small smile from Choso. "I hope to do something like that again."

"Yeah, me too..." he nodded, eyeing you.

A silence weaved before the two of you as your eyes gazed into one another's. Taking in deep breaths as you could hear the blood pumping within your ears, you tugged Choso down by the collar of his shirt as your lips pressed against his own. Your other hand slid into his hair, through the loose bun he held it in as you tilted your head to deepen the kiss. You didn't think much into it, actually, you felt you were in a fever dream as your tongue slid against his bottom lip before his tongue met your own.

As if you realized what you had just done, you pulled away and took a small step back, looking down at Yuji's resting body before wiping your lips with the back of your hand. "Sorry— I shouldn't have done that. I need to go." Without hesitating, you turned and rushed to the driver seat of your car, leaving Choso with a heart thudding in his chest and confusion floating around his head.

Then Monday came around. You had the intention to act like nothing happened when you met up at his place, casually conversing with Yuji and enjoying your time before you got to work. However, Choso was on a different boat. You were breaking out of that disguise and showing your real self, and having you kiss him said a lot. Why the hell would he act like it didn't happen when you clearly wanted it?

"Stop looking at me like that," you said as you typed away.

"How do you expect me to?" Choso asked.

"By looking away?" You shrugged but Choso rolled his eyes, closing your laptop as you gasped. "Hey—"

"I don't know who you've been with before, how your past relationships or whatever were like, but I don't do hookups or whatever the hell the kiss on Friday initiated. You tried acting like nothing happened these past three days, even though you were clearly avoiding me and my messages. Yuji wanted to take you to the aquarium yesterday and you simply left me on read only to answer hours later—"

"Oh, god, it was just a dumb kiss!" You rolled your eyes.

"So dumb that there was tongue?" Choso lifted an eyebrow.

"I got carried away, alright? It meant nothing," you clarified, but the sudden tremble in your tone was a dead giveaway.

"So if I kissed you right now, it wouldn't do anything? You'd feel nothing?" He asked as you nodded.

"Do your worst, I don't see you in any other light. You should be happy I've started considering you as a good fri—" before you could complete your sentence, Choso's hand was on the back of your neck as his lips crashed onto your own. His tongue was quick to slip past your teeth as it met yours in a frenzy. You, at first, tried pushing him away. However, the grip you had on his sweater only pulled him closer as your laptop nearly fell onto the floor if Choso hadn't moved it in time.

Desperately kissing one another as your noses bumped and saliva smeared, you breathed against one another. As both of you clung onto each other, the sound of Yuji's voice calling out for his big brother caused you to push him off of you as you wiped your lips. "I should go," you panted, gathering your things as Choso watched you.

"Wait—"

"It's getting late, my parents should be back," you said as you aimed for his front door, not bothering to look back.

"Fuck..." he breathed as he sunk into his seat, rubbing his face before Yuji called his name again.

A week passed since the second kiss. It was almost as if there was an unspoken rule not to kiss nor touch as you spent your meet ups with a safe distance apart. You didn't bring anything up, of course not, and Choso was too conflicted to figure out what the hell he should do. He knew you were stubborn, and if he wanted something with you, he knew it wasn't going to be easy. There were still layers protecting you and if he tried anything, he was afraid you were going to resort back to square one and hate him again.

So, he let it be... as much as it was eating him alive knowing you definitely felt something for him as he did for you. It was probably why things were awkward, as much as both of you tried to avoid being such way.

Choso was seated at your desk as you were nestled on your bed. It had been a while since he was in your home and the only reason why he was there was due to an annual inspection at his apartment building. If it hadn't been happening, you two would've been social distancing on his couch instead.

"Finally," you breathed, tossing yourself back on your bed. "We finished."

Looking over at you, the way your shorts clung onto your thighs and how your sweater rode up to expose a piece of your belly, Choso sucked in a sharp breath. "Fuck it."

Sitting up on your forearms, your eyebrows furrowed, "wha—" Choso was suddenly on top of you. You let out a gasp as he practically pinned you on your bed. Your eyes widened as you looked up at him, but the second you felt his lips on yours, they fluttered close. Your palms tried to push against him, but the sensation filling you—the nights of endless dreams of Choso—you couldn't help but succumb. Your hands slipped through his hair, tugging at the loose strands as your lips parted for him.

Kissing you deeply as his tongue glided across your own, tracing every inch of your mouth as you tugged on his hair, Choso felt you wrap one of your legs around his waist. Lowering himself on you before rolling you over to straddle him, you subconsciously began grinding your hips against his as your tongue reached for his again.

Just as you felt Choso's hands reach under your sweater, your door slammed open. Your heart was pounding faster than ever as the sounds of your father screaming echoed in your head. He came rushing in with rage in his eyes as he ripped you off of Choso. Your breathing somehow seemed louder than the yelling beside you as your vision began to blur. From one second to the next, you were shoved back behind your father as he grabbed Choso by the collar and yelled in his face.

The voice of your father and now your mother as she stood by the door in pure shock that turned into disgust, muffled as you tried reaching out for Choso as he was shoved towards the door. "Choso! Wait!" You called out but your father blocked you. "Stop— No! Choso!" Your blurred vision was forced to look back at your father as he  spat out his disappointment in you. Saying you will never see that boy again as long as you lived under his roof. How he blamed Choso for the person you were becoming and how you were forbidden to leave the house unless you told them exactly where you were going.

It was absolutely childish, you were an adult! But that wasn't what had you the most devastated, no, it was the fact that—yes, you had fallen for Choso and things were never going to be the same.

"How long has it been?" Yuki asked as she sat before you at her dinner table.

"9 days," you sighed, rubbing your temples as you sunk into your seat. Yuki basically became your therapist as she knew just about everything that's been happening between you and Choso. As exhausting as it was, she was rooting for you two. She was hoping for the best but hearing how things just kept getting out of hand, she couldn't help but worry for you. "He's avoiding me now. He's blocked my number. Couldn't call nor text him." Groaning as you leaned your forehead into your palm, you shook your head.

"You need to tell him," she said but you shook your head again. "You've gotta find a way. He can't be avoiding you for no reason."

"If I tell him I'm sure he won't say he feels the same. He's doing this for my sake, I can tell... I just—" sucking in a deep breath, you frowned, "it shouldn't have ended up this way."

"Well, you can't control your heart from falling so deeply for someone, can you?"

"Choco! You are smoking again!" Yuji stomped as he eyed his older brother who had just walked in from the balcony. "You promised you'd stop!"

"I know," Choso sighed as he rubbed his forehead.

"You broke your promise!" The little boy pouted. "It's not good for you! It makes you stinky and can kill you!"

"I know, Yuji—"

"I will stop eating candy if you stop smoking!" The pink haired boy pointed as Choso sighed.

"No, you won't—"

"And why haven't I see my best friend? It's been too long, Choco!" Yuji furrowed his eyebrows as he crossed his arms. Choso knew he meant you.

"I don't know..." the older man groaned, as if feeling a headache coming. He was used to his little brother's nonstop talking and pestering... but today, he wasn't having any of it.

"Liar! You are always talking to her! I miss her and you stopped having her over!"

"Enough!" Choso snapped as Yuji instantly flinched. His bottom lip pursed out as his eyes began to water. His tiny body trembled before he turned and ran to his room. "Dammit... I—" going after him and finding a lump under the sheets that was shaking, Choso frowned. "Yuji, I'm sorry." Seeing the giant stuffed tiger sticking out from under the sheets, Choso gently pulled the blanket back. "I didn't mean to snap on you... I just..." taking a seat on the bed as he eyed Yuji, Choso rubbed Yuji's back. "I can't see her anymore... which means you can't, either."

"But... I miss... her..." Yuji sniffled into the stuffed toy.

"Me too..." lying back on the bed as he looked at the ceiling, Choso felt Yuji shift beside him as Yuji sat up.

"Why can't we see her?" He asked.

"It's complicated..." Choso answered as he rubbed his face.

"Do you love her?" Yuji tilted his head as he held the stuffed tiger beside him.

Feeling his heart skip a beat, Choso rolled onto his side and eyed his little brother. "I do."

A gasp left the pink haired boy as he scooted closer. "Well, if you love her, you shouldn't give up," Yuji said as he gave Choso a hopeful smile. "You should go see her and tell her!"

A heavy knock sounded on Yuki's door as you furrowed your eyebrows and looked at it. "Are you expecting someone?" You asked.

"No, but you are," she said as she leaned back in her seat, stretching her arms above her with a sigh.

"Huh?" You shook your head as your confused expression deepened.

"Go open the door," Yuki nudged her chin.

Unsure as to why you listened, you let out a huff before pushing back your seat and standing up. "I don't know what you have up your sleeve... it better not be my parents. They know I'm here, you'd think they'd believe me..." you mumbled to yourself as you opened the door, expecting two unwanted faces... instead, getting one you had been aching to see. "Choso?"

Seeing the way your eyes widened as he stood before you at Yuki's apartment door, drenched in rain water as a nightly shower had rolled in, Choso felt his heart race as he reached for your face and pulled you into a sudden kiss. His beating heart grew faster as he so desperately clung onto you, but your palms instantly pressed against his chest and shoved him back.

Seeing the look of shock now on his face, you clenched your teeth, "you— you think you can just come out of nowhere and—"

Pulling you back into this kiss as his hands tug onto your wrists, Choso silenced your complaints with his own words. "I love you," he breathed against your lips, kissing them repetitively. "I love you," kiss, "I love you," kiss, "I fucking love you," kiss. "I'm sorry, I'm so fucking sorry," he nearly whispered as he pressed his forehead against your own as you stood stunned before him. "I was scared. You deserve better than me. I believed you were too good for me. We are from such different worlds and you deserved someone like you. That's why I avoided you. But, fuck, I've never felt this miserable being away from you. You were all I could think about. Dream about. I missed you. I missed your smile and laugh. The smell of your perfume. Seeing you being your genuine self around me. I missed having you around and caring for Yuji. Fuck, why do we do this to ourselves?" Choso breathed. "You avoided me, I avoided you. We let everything that doesn't matter affect us but I don't give a damn about what anyone else says, I love you and I want you. I want to be with you. I—"

Reaching for the back of his head as you tilted your own, you kissed him, now being the one to silence him. "I love you, too," you confessed before wrapping your arms around his neck and hugging him tight. "I do... I was scared, too. Of everything. But you bring out the best in me, you make me happy, Choso... I want you just as bad."

"Finally!" Yuki groaned as she stood from her seat. "Having Choso's number was handy."

Looking over at her as you had nearly forgotten where you were, you blinked in confusion. "What?"

"Oh, nothing, just me being the greatest friend and telling Choso where you were and making sure you two finally get together. It was exhausting seeing how things were going all because of lack of communication and fear and how ridiculous your parents are. You're an adult, they can't stop you from who you love," she rolled her eyes with a wave of her hand. "Now go on and leave with Choso and have fun. You can thank me later," she shooed as you and Choso backed up before she closed the door on you.

"Uh..." you stared at the door before looking up at him, seeing him shrug.

"She had been texting me for a while. I was actually a bit confused but then I started seeing her on campus when you weren't around and we got along pretty well. So I figured she'd know your whereabouts, asked her where you were, and luckily you were with her. This would've been much harder if you were home, but I would've done it anyway," he explained as you smiled.

"This is the most I've ever heard you speak," you teased as he shook his head. It was then you remembered he was still soaking wet and you were still outside just barely covered from the rain. "Let's go back to your place before you get sick."

The second you arrived at his apartment—and learned Yuji was staying at Nanami's with this last minute decision to see you—Choso was quick to pull you back into a kiss. You had tried to stop him, telling him he should dry up, but Choso instead started undressing right before you in between kisses. His black tee that clung to his body was the first to go, revealing his toned chest that you so quickly went to touch, feeling his abs underneath your fingertips. Then, he went for his sweat pants, kicking them to a side before he went for your clothes. You couldn't quite process what was happening, your head was spinning from the kissing (and the fact that he was in nothing but his boxer briefs before you). Before you knew it, all that covered you was your underwear as Choso left delicate kisses down your neck and collarbone.

Now standing before his bed as he held your hands in his, Choso pressed his forehead against yours as the two of you stood in silence, listening not only to the rain trickle, but your shared breathing. "I'm not that bad of person, am I?

"No," you shook your head. "I was a fool. I'm sorry..."

"Doesn't matter anymore," he mumbled, "you love me and I love you. That's all I care about. What's in the past is in the past, I love everything about you, and I'm glad I got to peel away those layers," he smiled as you did, too. "May we?"

"Mhm," hummed, "yes... please."

Reaching behind to unclasp your bra before slowly removing it from your body, Choso then lifted you up and settled you on his bed, tugging down your underwear. Bare and exposed to him as your heart raced and chest heaved, you were just about ready to cover yourself, but Choso's lips beat you to it. He kissed along your chest and bare breasts, down your belly and to your thighs. He parted your knees and admired the way your bare pussy glistened for him.

Watching with hooded eyes as he licked his lips, you swallowed as you clung to his bed sheets. Your eyes followed the way his figure lowered to his knees, how he kissed closer and closer to your heat before leaving a sweet peck on your clit.

Reaching one hand up, Choso interlaced his fingers with yours before he licked a broad strip up your cunt, moaning at the taste of you as you shivered. He felt your free hand slide into his dark locks as you let out a shaky breath the moment his tongue teased your entrance, only to make its way back to your aching nub. Choso smiled at the way your hand tugged at his hair to push on his head, further burying his face against you. Swirling his tongue around your clit, he made his way towards your hole before teasing it once again.

"Choso, please, stop teasing..." you begged with a breathy tone.

"Anything for you, baby." Plunging his tongue in you as he fucked you slow, he pulled away to play with your clit before two of his finger pushed into you. The sounds you made had his grip tightening around your hand as his other thrusted his fingers in and out of you.

Your toes curled as you felt that burning desire within you ready to explode. "Ch— Choso, I'm gonna—" but before you could finish, he pulled his fingers out, replacing his tongue with his thumb on your clit. Feeling his tongue sink into once again, Choso was more than ready to lap up your juices as you came on his face with a shaky moan.

Taking in as much of you as he could, groaning in delight at the taste, Choso released your hand before he crawled over you and slid his tongue past your mouth to share your essence. He listened to you hum as your shaky hands reached for his briefs and tugged them down. Helping you as he removed the remaining piece of clothing on his body, he felt your hands caress the side of his thighs before reaching in between the two of you.

Gliding your tongue along his as you so sweetly wanted to swallow each other whole, your hands wanted to feel the weight of him on them. You gently began to rub at his length, already knowing it was going to a bit of a hassle to have him fill you just by the feel of his bare cock in your palm. You pumped him slowly, brushing your thumb over his slit as his breath hitched against your lips. "Fuck me, please," you quietly begged. "I want you, I love you."

Separating from the kiss as he gently peeled your hand away from him before he could come on your hand (which he was sure would happen in any second) he brought you deeper into the bed before he reached for his drawer. That is until you stopped him. "What is it?" He asked, heart dropping. Were you having second thoughts?

"I want you bare," you breathed. "Please..."

"Are— Are you sure?" He asked as you nodded. "I'll pull out."

"No," you shook your head, giving him a look as if saying it was okay.

Blushing, Choso nodded, "okay." Wrapping your legs around his waist as he aligned himself with you, Choso slowly sunk into your tightness as a hiss left him. You reached up and held onto his shoulders as he bottomed out, pausing for a moment as he rested his forehead against yours.

"It's okay," you breathed before giving him a small peck to the cheek.

Pulling back slowly, Choso began thrusting in and out of you at a steady pace. He littered your face with kisses as your eyes fluttered closed. Kissing down your neck and chest, he brought one hand up to fondle with one of your breasts. Giving the other some attention as he sucked at the skin and left red blotches in his wake, faint bites and kisses too, he brought your nipple into his mouth as he began to pick up his pace.

"Faster," you breathed as Choso did so. He thrusted deeply into you, giving your breasts equal attention. Kissing and licking, biting and marking, moaning at the feeling of you squeezing him. Your hands tugged on his hair, the sweetest sounds leaving your lips as he fucked into you in a way that made your heart flutter. He wasn't trying to break you nor fuck you into the next life. No, he was loving you in a physical way to prove just how deep his feelings ran for you. The languid movements of his hips, the kisses against your body, the way he brought his hands into yours as he whispered his love for you into your ear. You swore you could hear angels singing. The tears brimming in your eyes and staining your face as you felt this wave of pure ecstasy wash all over you.

You had never come like this before, almost in unison as you felt your mind, body, and soul becoming one with his. You must've been in heaven, up in the clouds. It was almost ethereal. He filled you so deeply before his body nearly gave out and collapsed on yours.

He needed a moment as he stayed in you. Catching his breath before pulling out and falling beside you. Tugging you to him as his lips lazily met yours in the loveliest, sloppiest kiss, Choso ran his fingers through your hair as he mumbled sweet nothings against your lips.

"I love you," you breathed, nuzzling your face against his chest before looking up at him. Caressing his hair then rubbing your thumb along his nose and cheeks, you gave him a sleepy smile. "You're so handsome..."

Giving you the same smile, Choso caressed your forehead, placing his hand on the back of your neck as he kissed you once more, "you're beautiful..." he muttered. "So pretty... I'm so damn lucky..."

"Me too..." Enjoying the silence shared between you as you felt yourself more than ready to fall asleep, you then forced yourself up as you remembered something. "Choso! Your hair is still soaking wet!"

Letting out a small laugh, he sat up and reached for your hands, tugging you out of the bed with him, "then let's share a shower and you can dry my hair."

"Oh, I so won the bet against Gojo," Mei Mei said as she stood beside Utahime.

"Kinda predictable, but at least she's happy," Utahime said.

"And I helped!" Yuki beamed as the three of them watched you walk hand in hand with Choso across the courtyard of the campus. The biggest smile was on your face as Choso gazed down at you, almost as if it were a scene ripped from a rom-com.

"Ladies, now that Choso is taken, I'm available—"

"Save it, Mahito," Yuki raised a hand as the other two women beside her simply ignored the man. A laugh left Suguru as he was trailing beside Mahito, instantly gaining Yuji's attention. "But if Suguru is available..." teasing him with a wink, Suguru's eyes widened. "Men are so easy to toy with."

ONE YEAR LATER.

It was almost impossible to keep your hands to yourself. You always found yourself twirling Choso's hair around your finger, giving his bicep a small squeeze, hugging his arm, placing your palm on his thigh... it was rare for you not to be right beside him. Choso didn't mind, he never did, he loved how your touches felt. He welcomed them, actually. When you weren't touching him, even in the slightest way, he felt off. As if something was missing.

You didn't seem to care where you were. If he wasn't around, you'd patiently wait to see him again, knowing very well it would be you jumping him into a hug or pulling him into a needy kiss. You weren't sure who you had become within the year you had been with Choso, but it was so freeing.

Especially being able to do it in front of your parents.

They were not happy when they found out you had been secretly dating him for months without telling them, but their reaction didn't phase you. Actually, you were in the midst of moving out. Choso had offered you to stay with him—and although you were a bit worried at first—you couldn't have been any happier with your decision. Away from the two most troublesome people in your life, now living with the person you most adored, and your tiny best friend, Yuji. Yuji was the most ecstatic when he learned the news of you moving in. Already planning out things to do with you like movie nights and games to play together as well as other little things that made the boy happy.

Overall, you were happier than ever. Freer than a bird. And seeing the look of disgust on your parents face at dinner did nothing to stop you.

You didn't know why you did it, maybe it was because they were your parents, and maybe since you were a good person, you still visited every now and then. However, it was almost always with Choso. And they couldn't do anything about it.

"Well, we have to go pick up Yuji," you said as you stood from the now cleared out dinner table.

Choso followed in your lead as he felt you slip your hand into his. He was already used to your parents at this point and didn't bat an eyelash to their judgmental looks. Though, they were... improving. Slowly. The glares and scowls weren't so bad anymore. Wasn't his fault their little princess of a daughter fell in love with a terror like him. He loved her more than anything in the universe and nothing would change that. "Good night and thank you for dinner."

Gathering your purse and cardigan from where they hung, Choso opened the front door for you as the two of you walked right out. These nights always ended this way, you never waited for a response or some sort of action. In reality, these gatherings never lasted more than an hour. There wasn't much to say or do besides eat...

Climbing into Choso's car as the two of you let out a laugh you had been holding in, you gave his cheek a kiss before he backed out of the driveway and made his way to Nanami's. "It's the way your mom looks so disturbed when you hold my hand."

"And how my father bites his tongue whenever I give you the smallest of kisses," you chuckled. "A year and you'd think they'd move on. That's what happens when you have one kid. They should've had more."

"It's alright, they'll find a way to accept it... Eventually. In a decade or so," he said as you sighed, reaching over to hold his hand while resting your head against the seat.

"Whatever, at least my grandparents like you. My grandmother is always asking for you when I do my weekly calls," you snickered as Choso smirked. "She doesn't get why my mother is the way she is. She blames my father. Oh well, at least we've got their support."

"And our friends," he added.

"Mhm," you smiled. "That's all I need."

Eventually arriving at Nanami's home, you were greeted by said blond man trailing behind an excited pink haired boy. Yuji always had a habit of rushing out the moment you arrived, practically glued to the window whenever Nanami announced you two were on your way.

Helping the little boy into his car seat, both you and Choso greeted and thanked Nanami before the man bowed his head and closed the door for Yuji. Said boy smiled at you as you turned to give his hair a little ruffle before poking his ribs gently. "How was Nanamin's?"

"Fun! He helped me with my homework and then we had dinner with his family and then we played uno!" He said as you grinned. "And you?"

"Not as fun as it is being around you," you pouted, earning a giggle from the little boy.

"Choco's not fun?" He asked, earning a sigh from his big brother.

"Of course he is, he makes it all the better. I don't know what I'd do if he wasn't there," you sighed as Yuji lifted his eyebrows, only to grin.

"Then I think I know what you have to do to make sure Choco is always there!" Yuji clapped his hands.

"What is it?" You curiously asked as Choso looked over.

"Get married!" He exclaimed.

Looking at one another, Choso shrugged, "he's not wrong."

Playfully rolling your eyes, you readjusted yourself on your seat as you went back to holding his hand. "Well, then I'll be waiting for you to propose."

an: so you've made it this far? thank you so much! i promise you it was worth it... how are feeling? it's dramatic, i know, but i love drama and angst as much as i love smut and fluff... reblogs are much appreciated! xo

#haruno writes; #choso #choso kamo #choso x reader #choso x you #choso x y/n #choso x female reader #choso smut #jjk x you #jjk smut #jjk x reader