#and taako i love taako to bits and pieces
Note
number 9 or 19 for the prompt list for taakitz if you're feeling inspired? :)
Thank you so much for this prompt which is from this list (I’m still open to requests.) Sorry the reply itself is un-prompt (I spiralled), but hopefully you'll forgive me!
Read below or on Ao3.
--
Man, that’s going to stain…How’s it going?/ Well, haha, (doesn’t answer)
–
Kavitz screws all his courage to his sticking point and opens his eyes. He looks at the cake. He looks at his hands. He looks at the kitchen counter. They’re all still the same; bright red, unpleasantly sticky, and mocking him. The ‘icing’ could have at least had the decency to dry slightly in the air by now, but no, he’s made some kind of sugar based slime that is intent on eating everything - especially Taako’s worktops.
Taako’s worktops… Taako definitely absolutely loves these worktops more than Kravitz. Kravitz knows this, everyone knows this, so why on earth had he decided to try his hand at baking at Taako’s house instead of his own? Maybe it was because he spent more of his non-death crime battling time here than anywhere else, he hadn’t spent a non-work night on the Astral Plane since well… hmm… and all his stuff was here, so it made sense, perfect sense. Or it would, if he hadn’t just committed a crime against baking, nature, and kitchens in general, there was no way Taako wasn’t going to notice.
He’s stuck, is the problem. He can’t operate his phone with his sugary murder hands even though it will absolutely be worth Sloane laughing at him if she can save him from this. Sadly it’s not like he can just go over there… although, no, actually, it’s exactly like he can just go over there! Kravitz reaches out his hand, and only winces slightly at the wet sound his scythe makes as it zoops into it. It’s fine. It’ll clean, and if not he can just tell people it’s blood and they’ll think he’s extra fearsome probably definitely maybe.
He cuts a very careful rift, if he can place it just right then… Kravitz leans his face gingerly into the rift and uses his nose to press the doorbell. He learned very quickly after Sloane and Hurley started dating that it was important to rift outside and wait for someone to answer the door. Sloane tugs said door open as he’s reaching his nose out to press the bell for a second time.
“Kravitz? What, and I cannot stress this enough, the fuck?” She folds her arms and gives him a look which means he’s definitely never going to hear the end of this.
“I need some help.”
Sloane raises her eyebrows.
“It’s a cake problem.”
“You didn’t!?”
“I…”
“Kravitz! After last time? And the time before… and…”
“I thought it might be different.”
“Because?”
“Taako’s good at baking.”
“And you figured cake osmosis was a thing?” Sloane’s lack of sympathy would be hurtful if she wasn’t entirely correct.
“On reflection, it wasn’t the best idea I’ve had in my life.” An understatement, but he doesn’t have time to properly catalogue this error right now. It can haunt him when he’s lying awake at 3am for the rest of his life instead.
“How bad is it?”
“It’s not sentient.” He’s remaining optimistic.
“Yet…” She mutters.
“I gave it a bit and it seems fine.”
“Uh huh.”
“I know that’s what I said last time, but I really think it’s okay.”
“If I had a gold piece for every time…” Sloane begins.
“Please just help.” Kravitz must sound pathetic enough because Sloane just rolls her eyes, and smiles fondly.
“Okay, are you coming to me or am I coming to you?”
Kravitz holds up his non-scythed hand.
“I’m coming to you,okay. Gimme a minute and a me-sized rift?”
“Thank you.” Kravitz nods and splices.
–
There’s a shuffling noise and Sloane opens the door again.
“Why do you even have a hazmat suit?” Kravitz tries not to feel offended, he doesn’t succeed.
“It’s not a hazmat, that would be overkill, it’s a tyvek.”
“And you have it because?”
“Do you wanna know?” The distinct edge to her question tells him he definitely doesn’t.
“Is it for work?”
“Yes.”
“The flower shop job?”
“Nope, and you said you don’t wanna know anything that you could be compelled to give up in a court of law so…”
“So I won’t ask any further questions and should instead be grateful that you’re coming to help save me and Taako’s worktops?”
“You got it on Taako’s worktops? Kravitz! I’m going to miss you.”
“I don’t know if he can kill me.”
“Here lies Kravitz…” Says Sloane as she steps through the rift. “... The bestest friend a gal could ask for. I’ll miss his ability to transport me without paying bus fare most of all.”
“Thanks Sloane, you always know how to make me feel better.” Kravitz says dryly.
“So you sure fucked this up, yeah?” Sloane looks around at the general devastation.
“The cake might be nice?” Kravitz points with a sticky hand.
“Mmhmm.” Says Sloane like she wants to believe him but can’t.
“But… it’s just… yeah…” He trails off.
“Have you tried anything yet?”
“Er…”
“Water?”
“I can’t touch the tap.” Kravitz brandishes his free-hand. Tries for a second time to banish his scythe, fails. Maybe he doesn’t need to mention that specific issue to Sloane yet. “It’s really sticky.”
“Right. I’ll try water first. Do you have sponges you don’t care about?”
“As opposed to the sponges I do care about?”
“Hey, Kravitz, do you remember who you live with? The man who cares about nothing more than his kitchen and nearly broke up with you when you scrubbed the cast iron? You think he doesn’t have opinions about your sponges?”
She has a point. “There’s some in the garage.” He starts to move towards the door.
“No!” Sloane grabs the back of his suit and pulls. “You stay here, we need to keep the crime scene secured. By which I mean you specifically. Don’t move.
It’s a good point. Kravitz is going to stay so still. “I can’t quite remember where they…”
Sloane’s gone before he can finish and back too quickly for him to think about in depth. There’s definitely no reason for that which relates to her ability to case a joint.
“I’m going to try cold water first in case hot water makes it harden… or, you know, go on fire.”
“That was one time!”
“One time too many, Kravitz. One time too many.”
He opens his mouth and shuts it firmly again. The ‘gift to science’ defence doesn’t really work when he still doesn’t know how he did it.
Sloane dabs gingerly at the very edge of the worktop spatter. They both lean away in anticipation. Nothing happens. “No explosions is a good start.” She says cheerfully, as she walks back to the sink. “I’ll test hot now.” She repeats the leaning, runs the hot tap directly onto the red spot on the sponge.
“Is it helping?”
“Nope.”
“Soap?”
She tries. “Nope.”
“How hard do you think it is to replace an entire kitchen and also me in… er…” Kravitz glances at the clock. “2 hours?”
“If anyone can do it’s Magnus. Well… maybe not you. You could ring your Mum?”
“She’s not my Mum.”
“Then why did I have to get my parents to call her before I was allowed to come play and why did I have to call her Mrs The Raven Queen when I came to visit?”
“That’s manners.”
“So anyway, call your Mum.”
“I’m not calling my Mum… I mean. Fuck. Sloane! Stop laughing! Can you help me ring Magnus?”
“Why can’t you…” Kravitz brandishes his hand again. “Ah. Fine. Where’s your phone?”
Kravitz swings a hip towards her.
“Nope.”
“Sloane!”
She rolls her eyes. Hard. “It’s a good job I love you, you know that?”
“Like I haven’t earned this.”
“Hey, I’ve never…”
“Don’t make me bring up The Plantcident.” Kravitz side eyes her as she reaches for his phone.
“Urgh, you’ll never let me forget that, will you? I maintain it could have happened to anyone.”
“But instead it happened to you and I had to talk the bank manager down so he didn’t press charges.”
“It’s a good thing you’re so clean cut and know all the fancy words. Now, sssh... “Sloane holds his phone up to his ear.” … it’s ringing.”
“Wait, how did you know my code?”
Sloane doesn’t answer, she just smiles unnervingly instead. Kravitz worries sometimes about how much and how little he knows her all at once.
Magnus picks up before Kravitz can ask any more ill-advised questions (because he definitely doesn’t want to know the answers to them.)
“Hello Magnus, I just had a quick…. Yes? Oh… yes… No of course I think he’s a very clever boy… No, it’s okay, you don’t have to put me on to hi… Hello Johann. Magnus says you did a very good job today. Well done… Magnus? … Magnus?... Johann, can you get Magnus?... …. … MAGNUS?” Sloane winces. Kravitz mouths a quick sorry her way. “Great! Magnus, I… No, don’t hang up, I rang because I had a question, you know the kitchen worktops? … Mmmhm, yeah, they’re incredible, how long did they take you to make?... Oh? A week? Wow… And that was quick?” Kravitz widens his eyes at Sloane, her face doesn’t give anything away. “... and if it was a rush order? Oh… it was? Wow. Yeah. Lots of intricate bits…. Mmm… yes, you’re right, it is a funny shape in here. Good point… okay, so if someone had say, for example, stained them, how would one go about getting that stain out?... No it’s not a sex thing!... Magnus!... Do you really want to know the answer to that?... I didn’t think so… Look, it’s a hypothetical question which I need the answer to please?... Yes, haha, you’re right it is a good thing it’s hypothetical, Taako would be really upset yes, but if you could just tell me… you know, for the thought exercise, yes, right… It would depend on the stain? So if something was sticky and had food dye?... Magnus please, you have to focus… Okay… Yep… Water… nail polish remover… baking powder and vinegar… toothpaste… yes we’ll try that… yes of course hypothetically… no, please don’t tell him… Because nothing has happened. Everything’s fine. Sloane can tell you.”
Kravitz gives Sloane a pleading look and she retracts the phone to speak to Magnus herself. “Hey Magnus, yep, all fine here… Ha, yeah, just playing a fun hypothetical game, you know how we do that… give my love to Julia and Johann... Yeah, thanks from both of us… Bye!”
“So water didn’t work, but we can try the nail polish remover and the toothpaste, and I’m fairly sure Taako has the baking powder and vinegar.
“Be right back.” Sloane’s gone before Kravitz can tell her where anything is.
He tries to un-summon his scythe again while he waits. Nothing happens. He tries again, double hard, it tries to leave, there’s a second where it might, but no. Stuck fast. The door creaks open slowly before he can try a third time.
“I didn’t even know it was possible to get magic stuck to you.” He sighs.
Sloane doesn’t reply.
“Sloane?”
There’s a skittering noise. No. Oh fuck no.
“SLOANE!” Kravitz yells, hoping she’ll hear him before whichever one of them it is can get themselves stuck too.
“Pss pss pss pss pss.” He keeps his arms well out of reach, and moves slowly towards the door.
It’s Tiny Taco, of course it’s Tiny Taco.
“Hello there, why don’t you go back out into the hall? You can play with your toys and your friends. It’ll be so nice out there in the rest of the house, in literally any room but this room.”
Tiny Taco struts confidently forward and rubs his head fondly against Kravitz’s legs. This is the most affection he has ever shown him. Kravitz fights the impulse to lean into it, it’s all part of the ploy. Maybe if he slowly shuffles towards the door?
“You yelled?” Sloane asks from the doorway?
Kravitz turns to look at her. It’s all the distraction Tiny Taco needs and he makes a break for it.
“No no no no no no no!” Kravitz tries to block him with his body, Taco dodges. “Sloane can you…?”
She tries, she does. She moves fast. It’s not fast enough.
Kravitz reaches out and grabs him.
“Kravitz!” Sloane thwacks her palm against her head. “You had one job and it was standing still.”
Taco’s already squirming in his hand, this is going to get ugly fast.
“Shout at me later. Help, please?”
Sloane sighs unnecessarily loudly. “I’m taking a photo.”
“What? Sloane, no.”
“Do you want my help or not?”
Kravitz knows better than to try and bargain with her. “Fine.”
“Smile!”
Kravitz is not going to smile.
“Smile or I’m not helping.”
Kravitz smiles.
“Okay, what goes best with cat? Toothpaste?”
Taco wriggles again and digs his claws sharply into Kravitz’s arm.
“Ouch! Anything, just try.”
Sloane shrugs and brandishes the Aquafresh. “Brace yourself.”
It works, eventually. Kravitz has fresh scratches, but Taco has been pasted (and slightly snipped) clean and returned to the ‘anywhere but the kitchen’ exclusionary zone with enough Dreamies to buy his silence.
“One down. Shall we try it on the worktop or your hands first?”
“The worktop’s more important.”
“Oh wait, your phone’s going.”
“Who is it?”
Sloane checks. “Taako. There’s a few missed calls too.”
Kravitz smiles as endearingly as he can manage. Surely Sloane wouldn’t stand in the way of speaking to his boyfriend, not after how much he helped when she was worried about telling Hurley. “Would you mind?”
“Fine.” Sloane holds the phone to his ear.
“Hello Taako! It’s so nice to hear from you, love, how’s your day going? … mmhm… incredible… I hope you told him off… Maybe not the words I would have used, but as you say, it’s your school… Another award? Congratulations! Very much deserved as far as I’m concerned… How am I? Oh you know, fine… My day? Nothing much, just missing you… You can’t fireball me through a phone dearest… No, actually I don’t think you should try, if anyone can it’s you..”
Sloane prods him hard and makes a ‘wind it up’ gesture.
“Ow… I mean… How is your afternoon looking?... Wonderful… Anyway, I should let you go. I know you’re busy… No no, honestly… I’ll see you later, I know you have so much on… Love you… Goodbye, Taako!”
“Gross.” Says Sloane loudly.
“Shut up, you love your girlfriend.” She doesn’t have a leg to stand on as far as Kravitz is concerned.
“Yeah, you’re not wrong… I was actually thinking of… Wait, now’s super not the time. Let’s try and fix… you know, all of this?” Sloane gestures to the whole of everything.
Kravitz nods.
The layer of toothpaste doesn’t have the same effect on the counter as it did on Taco.
“Nail polish remover?” Sloane asks.
“Yes, whatever you think.” Kravitz eyes the clock warily.
It doesn’t work either, although it does remove the toothpaste effectively.
“Vinegar explosion?” Sloane sounds more excited than he’d like her to about this option.
“Did Magnus say how much to use?”
“Nope!” She says, happily, shaking powder across the worktop.
“Maybe you should start with a test patch?”
“Uh huh.” Sloane looks him dead in the eyes as she pours vinegar over it all.
The fizzing is far more dramatic than it would be on a small scale, he’ll give her that. Especially when it turns red.
It’s unfortunate that it’s still going when they hear the door open.
“Home, I’m honey!” Taako shouts from the entrance hall.
“Hi Honey, I’m Kravitz.” Yells Kravitz, automatically.
Sloane stops watching the fizzening long enough to pretend to puke. Kravitz glares at her. He can be gross in his own home. Taako’s own home. He doesn’t live here. Obviously.
“Where are you, Kraveroo? … Oh, hey there hi hello, Taco, most precious baby angel, how’re you doing this fine d… KRAVITZ!”
“Fuck.” Say Kravitz and Sloane in tandem.
“I can’t believe he told, we gave him so many treats!” Sloane shakes her head.
“He hates me.” Says Kravitz, mournfully. “We should never have trusted him.”
“Kravitz? Where are you and why have you given the cat a shit haircut?” Taako’s voice is hovering somewhere between pissed off and amused and Kravitz would love to be able to tip it over into the latter category. He can’t deal with being in any more trouble right now.
He widens his eyes at Sloane, sadly she’s doing the same right back.
“I feel like we’ve gotta let it fizz? That’s what’s doing the cleaning, right?” Sloane hisses.
“Yes. That sounds logical, but how do I?” Kravitz holds his free hand up.
“You could poke your head out through the door?”
“What?”
“He can’t see your hands if you’re just a head at the kitchen door.”
“Of course, thanks Sloane.” Kravitz makes it all the way to the door before realising his error. “Er…”
Sloane sighs heavily and dashes over to crack the door open before retreating to the counter.
“Hello my love.” Kravitz shouts, head poking into the hall and foot firmly wedged to stop the door opening any further.
Taako careens round the corner. “Why’re you in the kitchen?” His eyes narrow dangerously.
“I’m just doing something. A surprise.”
Taako doesn’t look any less suspicious. “What’s that smell?”
“Surprise smell.” Kravitz smiles his most reassuring smile.
Apparently it’s less reassuring than he thinks because Taako disappears, and, if the “what the fuck?” From behind him is anything to go by, blinks into the kitchen.
“It’s not what it looks like!” Sloane’s hands are in the air and her head’s swivelling frantically, looking for escape.
“Cha’boy hasn’t a clue what it looks like… what the actual fuck is going on in here?”
“There may have been a slight incident.” Kravitz decides that there’s not many routes other than honesty left at this point.
“Slight?” Taako raises a single, reproachful eyebrow.
“It’s not all of the things. Just some of them.” Kravitz tries not to sound sulky, he does.
“Why’re you holding your scythe?”
“Uh…”
“Why’re you red?”
“Er…”
“Did you try to bake?”
“No.” Kravitz replies before he can remember his plan to the tell the truth the whole truth and nothing but the truth. “I mean, yes. I did bake! The baking wasn’t the bit that went wrong. Look!” Kravitz points triumphantly at the cake.
Taako’s eyes soften for the barest moment. “It’s heart shaped.”
“It’s for you!”
“And the red stuff?”
“I had to ice it.”
“With?”
“Icing.”
“That you made from…?”
“I’m not actually entirely sure I remember.”
“Okay. Well first things first, Krav, Kraverino, beloved… you’re a skeleton. You, my guy, are made of bones. Meat you isn’t real.”
“Meat you isn’t real!” Sloane repeats. “I forgot.”
“Oh.” Kravitz unravels himself immediately and feels his scythe release into the ether, thank goodness. Not that he didn’t love it, but it’s a pain in the arse to lug around all the time, plus the drama of the reveal is always fun. “Thank you Taako.”
“Is this why you chopped Taco?”
“There was an incident.” Says Sloane. “But I toothpasted him out.”
“And he only bit me twice!” Kravitz adds.
“See, cha’boy said you he was coming round to you!” Taako sounds genuinely delighted. To be fair, it is an improvement.
“So that’s one down.” Sloane says. “Just… this to go.”
“Have you tried, you know, magic?”
“Er…” There’s a long pause. A very long pause.
“I rifted to Sloane.”
Taako pinches his fingers at the bridge of his nose. “So just to clarify, neither of you, including you, handsome man, literally made of magic. tried any kind of mending, purifying,…” he lowers his hand to glance at the mess again. “... banishing?”
“Well…” Sloane starts, as if there’s any way to get them out of this.
“We rang Magnus!” Says Kravitz quickly. He can’t leave it all to Sloane.
“Ah, well if you rang Magnus, notoriously magical Magnus! Of course he would have thought to suggest all of the best wizardly crafts, he’s always casting spells, punch, chop, harder punch, Magical Magnus, we all call him.”
“Can you get rid of it?I think the fizzing has stopped now.” Sloane points at the still definitely-more-red-than-it-should-be counter.
“Can Taako get rid of it? This lowly idiot wizard? I suppose I can maybe see my way to trying, but what good could cha’boy possibly do against something so fearsome as icing?” Taako waves his hands dramatically.
The red gets redder.
“Did… have you just made it stronger?” Sloane asks in disbelief.
“I meant to do that. It was just a warm up. Natch.” Taako’s voice doesn’t waver.
Kravitz tries very hard not to feel too smug.
“Abraca-fuck-off!”
A small chunk disappears, but the rest remains just as vibrant.
“Fuck. That was high level too. Uh. Cha’boy’s out of ideas, have you called your Bird Mom, Krav?”
“She’s not my Mu…”
Taako gives him a hard look. “Because, cha’boy’s just saying, these worktops, they’re good worktops, and it’d be a real shame if anything were to irreversibly stain them.”
“Taako, I can’t contact the god who oversees the natural order of life and death and ask her to take some time out to come fix… this.”
Taako raises an eyebrow.
Sloane gives him a look.
Kravitz snatches his phone back from her with his now blissfully un-gunked bone hands. “Fine, but I’m not communing, I’m texting.”
“She always rings you straight back anyway.” Taako says.
“Classic Mum behaviour.” Sloane adds.
Kravitz needs to spend less time with both of them, he refuses to be bullied like this.
His phone rings. “Hello M…y queen.” Kravitz glares at them both as they snicker. “We’re experiencing some issues with an, er, substance… No, not like that… No, we wouldn’t take anything that’s bad for us or the people around us… Thank you… Do you think there’s anything you can… yes. Yes, I know… I promise, this is the last time… I thought that maybe I’d be better… not just proximity… yes, okay, yes. Proximity… Thank you… I promise I won’t… I know I did, but this time I really mean it… Thank you very much… I love-you-too-bye.”
“What did your Mum say?” They chorus wearing their most pointed smiles.
“She’s going to have a look at it.” All of the fight has gone out of him. Kravitz has accepted his fate.
The counter shakes violently. Nothing happens.
It shakes again.
Nothing.
Kravitz’s phone rings.
He doesn’t want to answer. Less than anything does he want to answer, but he cannot ignore direct summons.
“Hello… yes… No… I can’t remember… I’m sorry… I don’t think… Okay. Yes. I’ll ask him…” Kravitz turns to Taako. “How attached are you to your kitchen?”
Taako narrows his eyes. “Very.”
“How would you feel if the counters had to be banished into a secure dimension?”
Taako’s mouth forms into a tight line.
“It may also not really be a question of whether you’re happy for it to happen or not because Raven checked with Istus and there’s a strand of fate which needs to be snipped right now…”
“So what you’re saying is that cha’boy’s losing a chunk of the kitchen he spent what feels like a century planning? That his best friend in the world hand crafted for him?” Taako presses his hand to his forehead and pretends to faint.
Kravitz opens his mouth and shuts it again. Guilt gnaws at him. He wants more than anything to fix this, but he doesn’t know how.
“Shall I tell Magnus you said he was your best friend?” Sloane asks.
“Take the counter.” Taako replies immediately.
“Taako, I’m so sorry.”
Taako smiles and waves his hand. “Honestly, Taako was bored of them.”
“But…”
“Magnus hasn’t really been challenged lately. I think he needs this. We’ll do it as a favour to him.”
“Are you…?”
“Honestly, Taako made the kitchen with himself in mind, but it’s not just cha’boy living here anymore, is it?” Taako waves his hand flippantly.
Kravitz pauses. “I… Taako.”
“Tell her to do it now.”
His tone leaves absolutely no room for disagreement, Kravitz gives the answer.
There’s a brief moment of nothing, enough time for Kravitz to chance a tentative look at Taako. He meets Kravitz’s eyes confidently, doesn’t even flinch as reality twists around them and there’s a gentle pop. Kravitz doesn’t need to check to know the counter is gone.
Taako smiles at him.
“I’m gonna head out. Kravitz could you…?” Sloane asks.
He cuts the rift without looking at her. “Thank you for helping.”
It seals behind her.
“I’m sorry.” Kravitz says again, because he is.
“You made me a cake.” Taako says again.
“Yes.” Kravitz replies, because he did. Regardless of everything else, he did.
“Because you wanted to fuck my kitchen up?”
“No! I, look, you made the me the pastries.”
“The date ones?”
“Yes. The ones from home. You spent weeks working at it and you didn’t even have a recipe, just me trying to explain a taste I can barely remember.”
“And cha’boy nailed it.” Taako grins smugly and Kravitz loves him in all his brash confidence.
“You did. You really did.”
“So you decided I needed cake too?”
“No one ever bakes for you.” Kravitz says quietly.
“Ango did that one time.”
“Yes, that’s true. But it’s been ages and they got set on fire, and no one else does. You deserve it. You deserve to be taken care of right back.”
“Hey, Krav. Quick question, just a teensy smidgey one. Who got the shoe organiser after cha’boy kept falling over them?”
Kravitz tilts his head, uncertain what this has to do with anything.
“Go on, don’t get shy on me, who did that?”
“Me.” Says Kravitz. He’d been sick of worrying that Taako was going to fall over and get lost in a shoe pile and need help when he wasn’t there to give it.
“And who actually puts the shoes on the shoe organiser when cha’boy forgets?”
“Me?” It’s not like he does it all the time, just now and again.
“And who got the cats those extra perches to go round the walls because I was worried they were bored?” Taako doesn’t wait for an answer. “Oh, yeah, that was you too.”
“But…”
“Bones, you care for Taako in so many different ways, so leave the baking to the professionals because so help me fantasy Jesus if you wreck any more of our house.”
“Our house?”
“Yeah. Now shut up and tell me what your perfect kitchen looks like so I can fix it.”
#Sloane and Kravitz are friends and I refuse to hear any different#Sloane#Kravitz#Taakitz#Taako#Background Magnus because nothing brings me more joy than one sided phone conversations with him#Can you guess which line made me laugh so hard I choked on my drink?#This went off piste and I had a great time#The adventure zone#TAZ#Taz balance#Tiny Taco is my favourite villain
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I loved the mermaid Lup you wrote! Would you ever do mermaid Taako? ❤️
Look. It's not as if Taako wanted to be around humans. If anything, he was pretty content with being actively far away from humans. Sure, they were fun to screw around with. Like, if cha'boy wanted to go up on a rock and lure men into dangerous waters, who was gonna fault him? It's not like they had to be lured. Mermaid and Siren were not synonymous, thank you very much. He was an asshole but not Siren-level asshole, at least.
But when you gotta keep dragging your sister out of increasingly dangerous human-related situations, it's not like you really had a choice. And seeing Lup get captured? That was the exact situation Taako tried very hard to avoid. And even then! Even then, she comes back, with a shitty grin and safe and not too badly injured, and— she comes back, not only wanting to go out again to meet with humans, but wanting to go out soon. Wanting to go out to meet a specific human who wore way too much of that white gunk they put on their skin and smelled too strongly of chemicals.
Like what the fuck, Lup!
But Taako is chill. He's so chill and regular and normal. And as much as he hated it, he couldn't bring himself to say no to Lup. She used that to her advantage way too fucking much, but that was just what he had to live with right now.
Lup's human— Barry, according to Lup. What a fucking awful name, Barry. Ugh— would come out to the water every so often to chat with her. They found a big rock off the coast where the other humans rarely came, so they could talk "in peace". Taako waited nearby, watching with narrowed eyes. Even without fully knowing the language (Barry was "teaching" her. Taako pretended to not care but Lup went over it with him afterward, so whatever), he could see the Tension building.
Taako did not want to supervise his sister's dates. That's what this felt like. He felt like a shitty, overprotective parent who was way too interested in her love life. With a human. Grosseroni. Taako couldn't see the appeal.
Well, Taako hadn't seen the appeal. But today was… different.
He still had an eye on Lup, of course. But being dragged into so many meeting with Barry had made him a little more comfortable with leaving them alone— both because Barry said he'd rather die than let her get captured again and because Taako told Barry that he would die if Lup got captured again, and that Taako would be the one to do it— so we went a little further up the coast.
He and Lup used to hang out at a place like this as kids. A little rickety abandoned dock, so overgrown with weeds and algae that one of the legs had snapped straight off. The wood wasn't too far down, but it was currently housing several little clams and Taako was not about to get into another clam fight. He had enough with the last one, thank you. The dock was short enough to just qualify as a few pieces of wood nailed together.
But it was a good place to hang out away from the sun. He was an appropriate distance from his sister's love life, hangin' below a collapsed dock, trying not to get some clams upset at him. Life was good.
The wood above Taako shifted. He perked up, turning his ear toward the noise. There was a vibration shuddering through the water. He sunk down a bit further as the vibration increased. A few pebbles from the little beach nearby got kicked into the water. There was a muffled sound from above the wood, just over his head.
Here's the thing about humans: They never had good intentions. There was a reason he didn't like messing with them. Hell, the whole event with Lup being captured had only solidified that feeling. They were gross, they were mean, and Taako was good out here, thank you very much.
The wood shifted and Taako saw a fleshy hand wrap around on the boards. He ducked, going a little deeper to swim away unnoticed. The hand dropped the board as he did— fuckin' shadows, Taako hated the sun. He sped away, towards Lup and Barry and the big rocks, only looking back when he had safely hidden away between two big, sunken boulders.
Here's the thing about this human: He was hot as fuck.
He was nothing like Barry. Obviously, humans look different. Like, duh. It's not like every fuckin' catfish under the sea looked the same. Everyone and everything had the ability to be solely who they were. But Taako much preferred the vibe of this guy than he did Barry. Barry looked like what happened when Taako tried to catch a sea cucumber for dinner. The guy looked like if dolphins were as cool as they thought they were. He looked like a barracuda but a cool one and not the one who stole food from under Taako's arms. He looked like the rock back where they grew up, the one that seemed to always stay warm even if it got too cold everywhere else.
He looked good is what Taako was getting at. And he was kneeling, looking out over the sea. He was probably trying to find where Taako (and his stupid fucking shadow) had gone. His eyes scanned the horizon for a few more moments before turning his attention back to the dock. His the sl— slee— arms? fuck, Taako couldn't remember what the arms of shirts were called— were rolled up and he was reaching into the water, taking out pieces of the dock one at a time.
Taako looked back over his shoulder. Lup and Barry were in an animated discussion about some nerd shit, probably. She had her arms up on the shore, flicking her tail back and forth in the water.
He looked back toward the human at the shitty dock, who was wiping some algae off his hand and onto his— his… what the fuck did humans use to cover their legs? Taako didn't know that word yet. With a final flourish, he turned back to Lup and Barry, swimming toward them with intent.
"—so it's less like I'm allergic to milk and more like it'll just fuck me up—"
"Taako!" Lup said as Taako surfaced too, shaking his hair out. Ugh. He knew he was technically damp all the time, but personally, wet hair on his neck did not feel great. "We were just talking about—"
"I don't care," Taako said. And then, "Sorry. Not really, actually, I'm not sorry— hey, uh, do you— do either of you know the word for leg shirts?"
#taako#taakitz#very lowkey still#blupjeans#also not centric but u know how it is w me#lup#taz balance#taz#ise cube writing#asks#musketrois#sorry for how long this took sdfksdf#and sorry to the other ppl in my ask box who's stuff is taking longer#i am at the mercy of chronic pain and work rn 😔#long post
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fic etc (new version!)
[update March 21, 2024]
These days I'm writing fic for Our Flag Means Death.
Longfic
I have three finished long pieces, in order of connectedness to canon:
Hungry for love, ready to drown (T, 33K) - a Stede POV retelling of season one starting with episode four, lots of missing scenes (so much with clothing but also wound care! dream sequence!). My love letter to canon; I watched those episodes so many times in little bursts to really absorb the writing and acting, and I'm very proud of the results. Goes well with S2 prep, if I may say so. Will probably definitely most likely get a sequel, but it's taking me a while to figure out how to approach it.
the devil's threeway (E, 30K) - Ed POV, starts with a pre-canon encounter with Jack and (non-canonical) Anne Bonney, follows up with a post-S1 meet-up with Anne and (also non-canonical) Mark Read, and then a somewhat unusual reunion with Stede. Includes the fic where Ed would not. Stop. Crying. There is a reasonably likelihood that I will write something similar or equivalent with the canon versions of Anne and Mary, but it's still marinating.
for the benefit of all the broken hearts (E, 62K) - the not RPF but not not RPF that is maybe the best thing I've ever written in any medium for any reason: a fix-it fic for the gorgeous and weird Water Flowing Underground, told from the perspective of the unnamed second wife. My exploration of the aftermath of tragedy, the possibility of repair, and varieties of love. Read the tags, read the author's note, read WFU first (or don't, I'm not the boss of you, and I do know someone who read them out of order and still enjoyed it), but please give it a shot. Posts tagged #carlita coded content are related to this work, sometimes very obliquely. There is also a follow-up fic of missing scenes, end up several worlds away, that still has one chapter remaining (I SWEAR I'm going to finish it), and a short sort of non-linear AU, back on my beat, that explores some alternate endings.
Some favorite shorter pieces
I have begun to long for you, a "mutiny against Izzy succeeds" canon-divergence AU
nice either way, my contribution to the Beard Discourse
Commit to the Bit, modern AU blackbonnet engagement and wedding
Season 2 and post-S2 fic
I spit on your grave - post-S2, Stede and Ed have a serious conversation, starting with how Ed didn't "happen" upon Stede being gut-stabbed, and going some tough places from there
lost and found - post-S2, featuring beach comber Stede and those cake toppers
Through the storm - the crew of the Revenge between episodes 2 and 3. slow and creepy!
in case I never make it through to where you are - bad ending AU set at the end of 3. MIND THE TAGS, it's a rough one.
Other stuff
Occasionally I post OFMD fic recommendations, which started as a weekly thing but, you know. They are still posted in sets of five on Fridays, when I do them, and tagged #five fic friday. (There's no particular system to my listings, just stuff I like that's not PWP.)
Not fic: I am doing a little project where I make/recreate recipes that I have written down but haven't made in a long time (or ever) - that can be found under the tag #food as play. Includes my rewrite of the 40 Orange Cake Recipe!
I have also written a lot of fic for The Adventure Zone, my favorite being The Reckoning Arrives, a 77k fic in which Lucretia, Taako, Merle, and Carey go looking for Kalen.
I wrote quite a bit of my TAZ fic with my late spouse Ryn (@taakovapes). Ryn died in September 2021; here's the post I wrote the week they died. I often post/tag about them and death and grief. (See tags #not all exits are made equal, #[grief dab], and #posts I wish I could send to Ryn in particular.)
#about me#my fic#my writing#ofmd#ofmd fic#taz balance#hiding this in the tags: it's 'carlita' because she is an amalgam of CRJ and Rita (and tbh neither)#and I learned as little about the latter as possible while I was writing#as I said at a party 'everything I know about Rita Ora I learned against my will'#there's a reason the unnamed wife is tagged Original Female Character
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🌹 🌹 !!
:D!!
Ask game here!!
These are both from Chapter 2 of Julia Burnsides vs Canon Lore :D
1. “I also have a willow tree with the colors of a sunset in the background on my thigh,” he slaps his left thigh with a large grin on his face. “That's for my family and my home after I decided to leave and explore the world and spread the word of Pan. The weird thing though is that the color of the sunset is a blue-green color with some light purple in the mix?” He laughs again and shakes his head. “Guy must have been color blind or somethin'. Either way, it's still a fantastic piece of art.”
(The different color sunset is from the minimal research I did about the colors of sunsets on other planets with different colored skies and came to the conclusion it would probably be the color of light frequencies a little bit above the regular purple which could honestly be completely wrong, but it's a fantasy world so shh lol)
2. “Magnus, what are you–?”
Before she can finish her sentence, he whips the chain around the spider's left legs, and he trips it, causing it to fall onto its side.
“Babe, you didn't have to deal with this!” Julia says as Magnus raises his ax. “You could have gone for Magic Brian!”
“But I had this idea to keep it from attacking you, and no amount of fear is going to stop me from protecting you.” He carves out some of its eyes, and the spider hisses in pain.
“Magnus, I love you so much, but you are an absolute idiot sometimes.”
(This moment was born brought to you by the fact that if Magnus attacked Magic Brian, Magic Brian wouldn't have attacked Taako, and he wouldn't have nearly killed him, leading to him not being able to discover cheese lol Or have his abracafuckyou moment)
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Tag 9 People You Want To Get To Know Better!
Thank you thank you @iam-jacks-redacted-information for the tag this was super fun and I loved reading your post!!
First Ship: oh babey you know it’s Kyoru of Fruits Basket. That was the first non-children’s-media I ever watched and I was immediately enraptured by them. Idk they still occupy a huge piece of my mind, I’m always thinkin bout them.
Three Ships: seriously you’re gonna limit me to three okay hard mode
-- Well I simply *must* start with Taakitz they were so deeply instrumental to The Way My Brain Is Now and I stand by the fact that they’re simply one of the best relationships I’ve ever seen. Do they only have a very little bit of screentime? Yes. Am I criminally in love with both Taako and Kravitz? Also yes. It’s a mental illness I love them. Something Something the world’s greatest wizard and the world’s most down bad grim reaper-- you can rip them from my cold dead hands.
-- I’d be remiss if I didn’t say BokuAkaKuroKen I’m so weak for the Tokyo OT4 nobody talk to me nobody look at me I love the dynamics, I love the characters, I love how different they all are and how well they work together, and I love Mookie’s art of them *drooling* LISTEN you’re telling me you’re not weak for a crazy professional volleyball player, a tired but handsome manga editor, a pro gamer, and a 6′5″ salary man??? Yeah okay. Sure you’re not.
-- I wanna say soapghost so badly but I have to give my last to Widojest. To you they’re the ship that never was, they’re canon to me though. He’s fire, she’s ice (LITERALLY), he hates himself she loves herself and everyone, he’s red she’s blue -- they’re the perfect foils idk guys. He wrote her an effing book for gods sake. HE CAN’T CALL HER BLUEBERRY AND EXPECT ME TO BE NORMAL ABOUT THEM. Yeah like I said to me they’re canon I am respectfully ignoring the end of the campaign.
Last Song: I’m fairly certain was “Fluids” by Michael Medrano it is SUCH the bisexual anthem idk what else to say you guys and I don’t know how to link music so you’ll have to look it up on your own but it’s worth the effort I promise it’s got the club vibes it’s got the catchy lyrics it’s got the bisexual disco cowboy singer what more do you want?????
Last Movie: Glass Onion
I almost never watch movies anymore who has the time but boy and I watched this together while I was recovering from a hospital stay and it was incredible. I love the plot, the cinematography and color design was to die for, costuming had me absolutely *drooling* I could go on and on. If you haven’t watched it, I highly recommend.
Currently Reading: Beartown by Fredrik Backman
“Culture” is an odd word to use about hockey; everyone says it, but no one can explain what it means. All organizations like to boast that they’re building a culture, but when it comes down to it everyone really only cares about one sort: the culture of winning... We love winners, even though they’re very rarely particularly likeable people. They’re almost always obsessive and selfish and inconsiderate. That doesn’t matter. We forgive them. We like them while they’re winning.
Yeah I’m reading it for the second time in less than a year it’s fine. Idk guys you can just fit *so much* character dynamic, development, and moral quandaries in these little hockey guys and the little hockey town they live in. I can’t recommend Backman’s work enough, especially Beartown, it’s such an important book.
Currently Consuming: PB frozen hot chocolate from freakin’ DQ
Currently Craving: Not to reinforce a stereotype but it’s cheese
Tag you’re it!!! @fandomsgirl10 @couldjanot @nighttimenoodle @lluvguts @eiry-real @enigmatic-cyborg @thatradicalrobot and anyone else who’d like to do this!
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Okay okay okay I hope you're still taking these and that you don't mind me sending another one in, but for the share a secret about a fic thing, I just read Say it with Flours, and it's past 3:30 in the morning for me, but I HAVE TO KNOW EVERYTHING ABOUT THIS FIC AND THEN EAT IT IT'S SO GOOD
stop i woke up and saw my inbox and almost cried !!!!!!!!!!
okay so i got inspired to write this after i watched Bridesmaids in a hotel with my parents, actually! and i agonized over a name to the point where the final doc on my computer is still just called "currently unnamed wedding shenanigans" [i still don't love the name tbh but i think it ended up being cute!]
i believe i was starting this as i was finishing trial of lucretia because i have no self control and decided that my first forays into fic ought to be three very long (for me) multichapter fics skldfjsldfsdl
this is my single most well-performing fic as well as my longest (the final doc on my computer is 92 pages long which is nuts to me!!!!) and it's fun to me because you can absolutely tell this was before i had a bit of a better grasp on characterization (and just. writing in general) but you can also see a marked improvement from beginning to end.
i had decided this would be a no magic, still fantasy races au like. a few chapters in which really has no bearing on the fic as a whole, it just felt right.
some secrets!
i've talked about this somewhere but my explanation for Taako being a father is that he spent a lot of his adolescence working at like. a boys and girls club style place and then a lot of his young adulthood working with another similar organization and he decided he wanted to foster and then fostered Angus for like two and a half years before deciding to adopt him (and this happened some time before the actual canon of the fic)
this is something that i don't think a single person has ever picked up on (because it really doesn't matter sldfjsldf) but lydia and edward are the photographers at the wedding (very blink and you'll miss it mention).
I originally wanted it to be such a slower burn but i literally couldn't figure out how to not make it drag.
the chapter names were a pain in my ass but the kiss does take place during Tulips which makes me giggle (and that's the only reason why it's called tulips)
and also I had originally wanted to add more scenes during the wedding but that chapter was like fifteen pages by itself and I got antsy
as in most of my fics that have Julia, she's much taller than magnus <3
the opinions on macaron flavors and phillip glass are my own sdlfjsd
and it was such a fun piece to write!!! this was really the piece that made me stick with writing fic. I was a little discouraged with the lack of traction I thought trials of lucretia got so this was a nice change for me
ALSO i did write a piece that is in its universe for the taz novemeber celebration
#rip (reeses in pieces)#tentatively-positive-3#THANK YOU YOURE SO KIND GAB !!!!#literally you can always ask me about my fics at any time!!!!#the ficlet takes place before the final scene of the fic slkdfjsldfkjsd#was it a cop out ending? maybe but i thought it was cute#asks
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what songs do you associate with Lucretia?
oooo The Crow by Dessa was the first that came to mind honestly. not all of the lyrics fit perfectly but “the slide show don’t put all the pictures together/you try to do it right, though” is. ooo Lucretia… the imagery of her chronicling the stolen century And her piecing together lives for Taako Merle & Magnus after voidfishing her journals really fits with that bit. also a friend of mine did show me this song specifically for my Taako playlist BUT pointed out the line “anger is just love, left out, gone to vinegar” as a very Taako & Lucretia line. he loves her, she loves him to the point of changing his entire life to protect him, and that pushes them apart. also I think “but you’re built to balance on two feet/so why you living this last year from your knees?” can be applied to Lucretia both during the year she was running from The Hunger alone and her role in stopping it during the day of story & song
Chromatic by Lighthouse and the Whaler also feels fitting for her… especially in the context of the stolen century. “is it so lonely? to be the one with some sense” definitely fits her insistence on cutting off The Hunger being the only way to stop it from consuming their world, but the song is upbeat and happy and I think that aspect really matches the fact that Lucretia really became her full self during those 100 years. she found her confidence and strength and family. also the line “I feel that we’ve grown static” being applicable both to how the IPRE physically does not change over the course of the stolen century and how it was Lucretia who voidfished their memories…… ouchie
also Crystals by Of Monsters and Men feels very Lucretia to me. I have like no annotations for this one I just. the vibes match Stolen Century Lucretia to me yknow. I feel like “let your colors bleed and blend with mine” just matches the image of the strands of light that put them all back together at the start of each year, as well as the fact that their bonds are so so significant to their journey
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I was tagged by @karinzany to take on the impossible task of narrowing my favorite characters to just 10 jgskdlfgjs
....Obviously my current bias/hyperfixation for the silly gay pirates is showing (The way I could, and nearly have, written full essays on how amazingly complex some of the characters are in this show) and I haven’t consumed much media lately besides OP, but I think I feel good about these characters being my current top 10 (They’re in no particular order)
1. Trafalgar Law (One Piece) - This man’s got two (2!!) tragic backstories and though he was undeniably revenge driven he somehow came out of that trauma so unbelievably kind. He wants to come across as this terrifying, cruel and rude ‘Surgeon of Death’ but his instincts are always to take care of others. Also, his dialogue when Cavendish and Robin tried to get him away from the fight to get treated? Still drives me insane. Despite what he wants people to believe, he gravitates towards silly and kind people too. There’s a reason why he’s so adored by his crew and they mean the world to him too.
2. Roronoa Zoro (One Piece) - Zoro’s character is so deceptively simple, but *slaps his massive tits* You can fit so many layers in this bad boy. The way he dedicates his entire being to Luffy, the way he claims that he doesn’t see the point in the whole “I’ll have your back” mentality AND YET he will absolutely rush in to block and protect the others of the crew. He’s the first mate so when Luffy is running off being Luffy he’s gotta be the one to make sure everyone else stays safe. But, he has so much faith in his crew’s strength and is such an amazing team player. He’s also a little mischievous and silly and easily embarrassed and is so fucking hard on himself. Just *makes wild vague gestures at his mossy head* HIM.
3. Monkey D. Luffy (One Piece) - When I started the series I really liked Luffy but Zoro was definitely my favorite for the longest time. But Luffy is really hard not to love. But then... Idk at some point during Whole Cake Island I would just start tearing up and crying over this boy. And I’ve only continued to do so in Wano. He’s just- god he is the sweetest ever. Just the goodest sunshine boy. He’s just so full of love and will stop at nothing to save someone he’s noticed is having their freedom taken away or are suffering at the hand of a tyrant who’s got no value for people’s wellbeing. He’s so stupid and doesn’t understand typical social behavior but he’s SO emotionally intelligent and he’s grown so much and he’s just this sweet, unstoppable force of love.
4. Taako (The Adventure Zone) - Okay, finally forcing myself to move away from One Piece characters. Taako is another character who’s just got so many damn layers to him. He’s full of himself, yet he’s got so many insecurities because of trauma. He’s an asshole, yet he’s kind. He plays stupid, yet he’s probably the smartest of the main three. He definitely started out as just a joke-y character, the whole series very much started off as just the Mcelroys goofing around playing a silly game of dnd, but his complexity as a character down the line is insane. I think about his lines and actions as the story was about to come to its end CONSTANTLY.
5. Zuko (Avatar The Last Airbender) - Probably the first character that would consume my thoughts. After all these years Zuko easily wins a spot in my list of all time favorite characters. Zuko’s character development throughout the series is just *chef’s kiss*. Wonderful. Amazing. I love this poor boy so much.
6. Karkat Vantas (Homestuck) - Honestly it was tempting to put both him and Dave Strider in this list but I think Karkat has Dave beat by a little bit in my heart. Yet another character that is so beautifully complex and wonderfully flawed, but my god was he just doing his fucking best. I love this loud angry boy immensely.
7. Hunter (The Owl House) - This poor, poor boy. I hold him so gently in my hands. He is just doing his absolute best. He’s gone through so much abuse and trauma and I just wanted him to be given the chance to be a kid. To be happy! His development is also so so good, and I just hope the trauma he’s going through doesn’t completely crush the sass and confident silliness he had before.
8. Caleb Widogast (Critical Role) - This spot was a toss-up as to whether I wanted to give it to Caleb or Essek, but I had the brainrot for Caleb Widogast for near the entirety of Campaign 2 so I felt obligated to give him the spot on my list. Can you see the pattern of my love for traumatized characters who manage to be a little silly and try their best to be kind (even though in Caleb’s case he very much believed himself not to be capable of being a ‘good’ or kind person). It was pretty hard not to include many of CR2′s characters, but I tried to keep myself from having too many from the same show/media (even though I definitely didn’t actually do that gsjkflg)
9. Roy Mustang (Fullmetal Alchemist (Brotherhood)) - Enter the series I did also cave and give two spots to. Starting with Roy Mustang. He’s silly but so fucking clever. He cares so much more than he lets on. I think he’s definitely my favorite of the series.
10. Greed/Ling (Fullmetal Alchemist Brotherhood) - My god. Talk about beautifully flawed and complex characters. Yes, they’re technically two characters but I love them both and their interaction together so much that I couldn’t give one the spot over the other. Just a pair of dudes who have to learn the hard way the consequences of their actions/ambitions.
Honorable Mentions: Jester, Essek, Mollymauk, Yato, Trevor Belmont, Alucard, Riza Hawkeye, John Silver, BlackStar, Dr. Stein, Mr. Spender, Himura Kenshin, Vash the Stampede, Kurapika, N, Decim, Eda Clawthorne, Dave Strider, Duck Newton, Ned Chicane, Usopp, Donquixote Rosinante
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ectoimp:
but its amazing how they make magnus’ willingness to throw away his life a plot point. Dumb shit like ‘lawl gonna jump off the train’ because really sad because of just how ready Magnus was to die and how little he valued his life at that point
I actually really wanted to reply to this in a way, but didn’t want to derail the other post with too much, but honestly, I really enjoyed that arc a lot for that reason. A lot of Magnus’s characterization wasn’t really seen until this arc and after, and it hits the listener who probably already cares about these characters that this character doesn’t care about the consequences if it means saving others and that kind of started more here. He could die, but he chose to do his stunt on the train because that meant no one else would do it.
Before that really, they were like- playing, but also mostly dicking around with each other and Griffin. They kind of did what they wanted and if it was funny or cool, then bonus points. But then the train happened and I feel like from that moment, Magnus started to come out. Slowly, and it was probably still for cool stunts at that moment, but his personality later was coming in, too.
You already know this, but a lot of the time, and especially in D&D, characters can start as a flat concept with a personality based on class. Like Magnus did actually, with always rushing in. But over time, as you get more attached to the character, they get deeper as you fit the character and realize how they are really. What really motivates and drives them, and as they form connections with other people and keep growing.
Like, here in the Rockport episodes he probably did it because it did look cool, but I kind of feel like it was the start for him learning how he was going to be? He’s purposely reckless because of stuff from his backstory that Travis got together.
Honestly the moment it really cements that Magnus does this not just because it looks cool and isn’t just him ‘rushing in’ or trying sick stunts is when he does the rogue training. When he’s told that sometimes he can hide away and someone else can take the hit and he like- refuses. Because if he doesn’t get hurt, then his friends will.
#TAZ#the adventure zone#tristan rambles#spoilers#honestly i could talk lots about TAZ as I'm slowly finishing the last bit- i just finished the suffering game arc#and like- i like Taako and Magnus of the main three for differing reasons but i love that boy and when Travis got invested#and started really fleshing Magnus out? it was really awesome to see the pieces that made him more than just 'lolz imma fighter i punch'#like gosh in the suffering game#the way he agonized over Taako's choice really like#it was so good#Taako is fun as a character and you see bits of him putting on his brave face and not feeling he's much outside his magic#and you know Justin probably got attached but was somehow having Taako act like he did at first but with more layers underneath#which was awesome#he still had all the humor he started the character with but he went from a puddle to an iceberg#honestly the only reason I didn't care for Merle as much as the other two was because i wasn't struck by him really like- finding himself#Clint still felt like he wasn't taking the game as seriously even now towards the end#maybe he'll get something in the last tenish episodes that really makes him stick out#but i didn't see as much growth from him- he kept flopping between 'i'm a man of Pan and devout' and 'well god doesn't really give a shit'#and i'm like buddy you're a cleric- his religion was only really used as a tool and even after changing to a nature god he was still very...#...jehovas witness style? i liked the kids but even then i didn't feel like merle got depth characterization wise. just that he had story#even his thing about being forced into religion- he never seemed bitter about being a cleric in general so it didn't stick#he just seems to say what's more funny or make references#so i enjoy him but like the others really seemed to fall into their characters so i ended up liking theirs more i guess#anyways that's enough rambling lol whoops
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do you have twitter :o
I do and I post about very serious things such as
#so many DnD shenanigans coming back while listening to TAZ#which I am#by the way#loving to bits#wowie#in the middle of the Petals to the Metal arc#WHACKY RACES OH GOSH#Anonymous#for those interested this DnD character was a wizard elf called Ex Tavery#Ex for short#and was the absolute most chaotic neutral piece of shit#so you understand why I am absolutely adoring Taako here
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(for the first sentence thing, kinda 2 sentences but oh well)
Taako scrambled to standing. “Oh hey Ango... So how long have you been sitting there?” he asked.
Angus didn’t blink. “Long enough that I’m hoping we can skip the part where you try to bullshit me, sir.”
Taako groaned. “I’m gonna turn Magnus’s thieves’ tools into grape jelly for teachin’ you that fuckin’ rogue shit,” he said. “And if you speak a word of this to anyone - anyone! - I’ll turn you into a frog. This doesn’t leave this fuckin’ room, capisce?”
“You don’t have to threaten me, sir!” Angus told him cheerily. “Your secret is safe with me. I think it’s sweet.”
Taako scowled. “I will polymorph you into a mouse and let my cats eat you.”
A few years ago, Angus would have quailed at this, but at the wise old age of thirteen, he only held back a grin. “Captain Davenport taught me Counterspell last week. I’ve been waiting for a chance to try it out.”
“Don’t test me, you little shit.”
Angus obliged and did not test him, instead opting to take another look at the countertop. Shiny bits of metal and no small amount of sapphire were strewn about Taako’s workstation, but that wasn’t what gave Angus pause. He picked up a piece of adamantine for inspection. “Oh, wow, is this the ritual circle for Invulnerability?”
Taako swatted his hand away. “No touchie! Do you know how long it took me to draw that? I need to be done by six.”
“Oh, is that when Mister Kravitz comes home?” Angus asked innocently.
Taako narrowed his eyes and made for his wand.
“Okay! Okay, I’m sorry, I’ll quit it,” Angus said, raising his arms in surrender. “But seriously, sir, this is amazing! I knew you had experience with artificing, but I didn’t realize you could imbue objects with such a high level spell!”
Taako waved a hand and shrugged. “Well, you know how we do,” he said, glancing back towards the circle. “Krav’s always getting into scraps with necrolords, so I figured, whatever, it’s not a big deal.”
“It’s very practical!” Angus said. “And the ring is lovely. Sapphires represent the Astral Plane, don’t they? You don’t have to be nervous, sir, if it’s you proposing, I’m sure he’ll say yes!”
Taako flushed and snapped his fingers; on cue, Angus began to levitate back towards the front door. “What would you know, anyway, you’re like twelve! I don’t have to take this. Get lost! Scram! Shoo!”
Angus laughed.
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Barry & the twins for 12!
Prompt from @juicywritinghoard Prompts for Fun and Profit which can be found by clicking here.
_____
Taako reminded Barry of a cat with socks on. He’d forgotten how to exist in his body and was adding pieces to the communal puzzle like his arm was a claw machine. Barry raised his eyebrows at Lup, glanced quickly to Taako, then back again. She grimaced, shrugged, and turned back to poke at the fire. Barry should have anticipated her infatuation with the log burner was going to override everything else this Candlenights.
Maybe bringing Taako had been a mistake? Barry hadn’t meant to be selfish, but last year he’d missed the twins so much. He’d never leave his Mum here alone… well Marlena wouldn’t be short of people to spend the holiday with, but Barry didn’t get the chance to visit often. He didn’t want to miss out on family time, but his idea of family had changed a lot lately. It wasn’t just him and his Mum any more. The thought of Lup and Taako being on their own didn’t sit right. He knew they tended to just let the day pass them by, but there were so many bad memories associated with it that he thought it would be nice to at least try and create some positive ones. When he made the suggestion Lup had been so excited, Barry immediately knew that Taako would agree to come too - just like Barry, he’d do anything to make sure Lup was happy.
It seemed like everything was going well at first. When they’d arrived Marlena had run down the porch steps and grabbed them all into a hug. She’d met Lup before, but only briefly, and Barry knew she was looking forward to spending time with the people who were so important to him. He talked about them a lot, of course, during their weekly phone conversation; and he talked about Marlena to the twins too. It was nice that they got to meet properly though.
The hand knitted jumpers had been waiting on their bed when they went to put their bags down after the initial hellos. Lup’s was blazing red and Barry’s a deep grey, the candle pattern across them was charmingly wonky. Lup had squeaked in excitement and immediately wrestled her way into it, Barry wasn’t far behind. His Mum made these every Candlenights; he treasured each differently patterned jumper and the cosy feeling of love which emanated from them.
There was no reply when they knocked on Taako’s guest room door on the way downstairs, but they had assumed he needed some time to brush off the journey, unpack, and recharge his social battery. They didn’t expect to find him in the kitchen with Marlena, sleeves of his candle covered purple jumper rolled up to the elbows as he helped her make hot chocolate.
“Barry! Lup!” Marlena swooped round the scrubbed wooden table to hug them both again.
“Taako was just telling me about his magical hot chocolate - I said we’d have to make it as well as the Bluejeans recipe and do a taste test.”
“Ooooh, a true battle of the chefs. I’m definitely going to have to abstain from judging though - Twin exemption!” Lup hugged Marlena back as she spoke, and Barry couldn’t help but melt a bit. It was so nice to see all these important people together and getting along. He’d been a bit worried about Taako’s spiky nature, it wasn’t always intentional, but he often left people upset in his wake, then upset himself worrying about it. Everything seemed to be okay though, and he couldn't help but beam.
They’d chatted easily as they made the hot chocolate, and even Taako had admitted that Marlena’s was ‘nearly as good’ as his own (Barry quietly thought that she had him beat, but knew better than to voice that opinion). Then they’d retired to the lounge to do the Candlenights puzzle. Barry had helped Marlena carry out the trays of velvety truffles, the fancy crisps, and the shortbread his Mum only made for special occasions because of how fussy the recipe was. Once they were all settled with candle shaped novelty plates full of goodies and huge mugs of mulled cider, Taako’s strange behaviour had began. Barry didn’t understand it, he’d seemed fine - he’d seemed more than fine. He’d joked with them, shared stories, asked Marlena about baby Barry, life before she’d lived here, and her favourite things to eat. All of them had moved to comfort her when she got misty eyed recounting a story of Barry’s Dad, and they’d laughed together once she’d dabbed the tears from her face and told a story about eight year old Barry proudly telling the audience of a robotics competition that he wanted to be a necromancer when he grew up.
“Served them right for asking in front of everyone.” Marlena had added.
“It’s a lot of pressure to put on someone! ...I bet they didn’t do it again.”
But now? Now Taako looked ready to vacate his body.
“We need more logs, I’m going to go grab some.” Lup announced, jumping to her feet.
“They’re just in the store out the back, right Marlena?” Lup asked, and Marlena nodded.
“I’ll come with you, there’s a basket for them here to make life a bit easier.” Marlena grabbed a large wicker basket from the cupboard next to the now-depleted stack of logs, and bumped the door shut with her hip.
“Follow me, love.” Marlena said, and walked towards the kitchen. Lup followed, pausing quickly to wave at Barry and Taako before disappearing through the door. Taako didn’t wave back, he continued nudging puzzle pieces, staring at his own arm as if confused by it.
“You, ah, you doing okay there bud?” Barry asked, finding it hard to mask the concern in his voice.
Taako glared at him, and Barry found a confusing amount of relief in that. Spiky Taako was more familiar to him than the new dazed version.
“No, Barold.” Taako replied, stressing his name aggressively.
“I’m not okay, actually.”
“I’m sorry…” Barry began.
“What’s wrong? Is there something I can do to make you feel more comfortabl…”
Taako interrupted before he could finish.
“I’m used to being miserable over the holidays, Barold. Lup and I sit on our sofa and remember how fucking awful every Candlenights was growing up, Barold. We order noodles and we bitch about how bad they are, and it’s nice because she’s there, but it’s miserable, Barold.”
Barry didn’t know what to say, so he went with nothing.
“... and now, now, you steal us away, and your Mum’s a fucking delight, and she knits us these jumpers, these jumpers Barold. They’re adorable. We all match. It’s like a big hug and we’ve all got one…” Taako’s voice was getting louder and higher in pitch. This was familiar territory, ranting Taako was less worrying than silent Taako. Barry tried very hard not to smile.
“... so here I am in a lovely jumper, Barold, drinking the best hot chocolate I’ve had in my life, and eating delicious shortbread which I have to steal the recipe for, and we’re doing a godsdamned puzzle, and it’s already the best Candlenights I’ve ever had. What am I supposed to do with that, Barold? What? How exactly am I supposed to process this?” Taako’s lips clamped together and he looked very intently at the ceiling, blinking hard.
Barry didn't feel the urge to smile any more, he wanted to wrap his arms around Taako, or maybe just to fight every shitty relative and foster carer they'd had...
“Have, uh, have you considered just enjoying it? Not that it matters if you miss anything, because, well, we can do this every year, there's no pressure, but you know, maybe just try to let yourself have a good time? I love having you here.”
“We can do this every year,” mimicked Taako, glaring at Barry.
“We, we can?” Barry was confused.
“Taako, of course we’ll do this every year. You’re part of my family, Candlenights is for family. If you want to be here, you’ll be here. Obviously we won’t force you, but you’re basically my brother at this point.”
Taako glowered at Barry, then looked down and repeated.
“Every year.”
“As long as you want to be here with us, you'll be here with us.” Barry replied firmly.
There was a long moment of silence, but it wasn’t uncomfortable. Taako looked up at Barry and nodded, then reached for some more puzzle pieces, finally looking like he’d met his own hands before.
Lup and Marlena bustled back in, Marlena's basket and Lup’s arms piled high with logs. Lup quickly deposited her load and grabbed the basket.
“Oh, and you can just ask for the shortbread recipe, dear. It’s fine.” Marlena patted Taako on the shoulder as she passed his chair to sit down.
“I don’t mind sharing it with family.”
#I want Barry's goth candle jumper very very very much#You get those kids that say they want to be a tree or whatever? Barry wanted to be a necromancer and no one could stop him answering that#(Not that Marlena tried)#TAZ Fic#TAZ Balance#Noodyl Writes#Barry Bluejeans#Lup Tacco#Lup#Taako
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Day 7 - Aftermath
It was weird, still being in the world after it almost ended. They had spent a long, long time wondering what a plane would look like post-Hunger, but Lup figured that this was probably the best outcome they could hope for.
The sense of rebuilding and community here on Faerûn wasn’t completely new— there had been several worlds that actually heeded their warning and prepared for the fight. But seeing it afterward? Seeing that strength and love persist even though the Hunger had tried to destroy it? It was truly beautiful.
And, honestly, made Lup feel a little bit shitty about not exactly feeling up to help.
It was— she was a mess. To put it in simple terms. Lup had spent an entire decade imagining what it would be like when she finally got out of the umbrastaff and now that she was out she couldn’t bring herself to go through with a lot of her plans. Sure, she did most of the plans that involved hugging people, or fuckin’ talking to people, and all that. But otherwise, she just felt… shitty. And out of touch.
The crew had moved on without her, especially after Lucretia’s help. Honestly, Lup couldn’t bring herself to be mad about that. She could very easily where Luce had been coming from. Like, Taako and Barry would have kept searching for her no matter what. Hell, Barry had. And she loved him for that, she really did, but in all honesty? She was kinda glad Taako— and Barry, for the little pieces he got to— had the chance to live without her being missing hanging over his head.
But it also left her in this situation. The Hunger was gone, the world was saved, and Lup had no true connections with anyone besides the crew. And even then, they weren’t the same exact people she had left.
Merle had kids! He had been married! Magnus had married too, but it was a bit of a different story from what Lup knew. Taako found people who loved him, with his show, with Kravitz— at the very least, Barry had gotten the chance to know the world, if not many of the people in it. Lucretia had the entire Bureau and people she had met along the way. Davenport was the one closest to how she felt, but at the very least, people knew him, even if wasn’t who he really was.
Lup didn’t have anything. Aside from Cyrus, which didn’t go great for either of them. All she had was a weird, fleshy body and a family who had changed when she was gone.
“Lup?”
The door to the study opened. Barry peeked his head inside. The hallway light flooded through the small gap in the door. Lup had the lights in here down low, so the contrast made her squint a little.
“What’s up?”
“You okay?” Barry asked.
“Not really,” Lup said after a moment of hesitation.
Barry shuffled into the room, gently closing the door behind him. Lup leaned against one of her hands, turning a little so she could see Barry when he leaned up against the side of the desk. He held out a hand and she took it, squeezing softly.
“Can I do anything for you?” Barry asked.
Lup would literally never get tired of him. She got so, so lucky being stuck on a ship for a hundred years with this man.
“Mh.” She brought their hands up to her cheek, pressing against it. Barry smiled. She had missed him so fucking bad. “I’m just… thinking.”
“Well, there’s your problem,” Barry said.
“Stupid,” Lup said, but she was smiling anyway. “I— it’s just… Like, we thought about what it would be like after the Hunger for so long, but now that we’re here I’m— I just don’t know what to feel about it, y’know? It’s— it’s so much, sometimes.”
“I get that,” Barry said quietly. “It’s— it’s been hard.”
“So hard,” Lup said.
“Yeah,” Barry said. “And I— Lup, I can’t even imagine how hard it’s been for you, with the— the being trapped and everything. You’re doing so good, and I know it’s been rough. I just… it’s hard to think of what can make it feel better, y’know? Do you— is there anything you wanted to do? When you were in the umbrastaff, I mean. Like, we can make a bucket list-”
“Most of it was just wanting to hold you again,” Lup said. She cleared her throat, blinking away tears. Barry squeezed her hand again. “I— the world is just so different than how it was during— when I left. I can’t— I don’t know how to adjust to a world where I don’t know anything or anyone.”
“It’s hard,” Barry said. “We could, uhm. We could go on a road trip?”
“Go on a road trip,” Lup repeated.
“Yeah,” Barry said. “So, uh, so you get to know more of the— the lay of the land and all— and we can go places where I know someone or— or where Taako knows someone, and we can talk to them, and get you acquainted, at least—”
“I don’t wanna assume your friends wanna be my friends—”
“Babe,” Barry said. “Anyone who doesn’t wanna know you is full of horseshit anyway.”
“Yeah?” Lup said.
“Yeah!” Barry said. “Like- you’re Lup! Look at you! One, you’re hot as hell-”
“Barry—”
“Two, you’re super kickass? Like, I don’t know if you’ve been hearing the news-press, but—”
“Ugh, the news—”
“I know, right?” Barry said. “And three, you’re— Lup, you’re so genuinely kind and funny that I can’t imagine anyone wouldn’t be jazzed to meet you. You gotta— I know this is your line, but you gotta stop worrying so much about it. People love you. If you wanna go out and meet ‘em, then I’m gonna be right there with you, okay?”
Lup finally let go of his hand, if only to wipe her eyes. She was smiling, though.
“You think so?” she said.
“I know so,” Barry said. “Just… think about it, okay? Doesn’t have to be a road trip, we could just— take a vacation. Gods know we deserve it—”
“We do.”
“Just let me know,” Barry said. “And I’ll be there with you, okay? Now you gotta come eat before everything gets all cold and gross.”
“You’ve convinced me,” Lup said, pushing her chair back. “This bitch is ready for spaghetti.”
“You’re always ready for spaghetti.”
“It’s a character trait, babe, keep up.”
#blupjeansweek2023#blupjeans#barry bluejeans#lup#taz#taz balance#mine#ise cube writing#habby last day of blups week :'3#i hope everyone enjoyed these sdlkfsd
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20 questions for fic writers
Tagged by @yerbamansa, thanks!
1. How many works do you have on AO3?
169 😅 150 of which are for The Adventure Zone (I wrote a LOT of small fic for TAZ, and just a lot of TAZ fic in general)
2. What’s your total AO3 word count?
604,338, which remains absolutely wild to me. I hit the half-million mark this year.
3. What fandoms do you write for?
Currently Our Flag Means Death, but previously The Adventure Zone, and I have one Star Trek (TOS movies) fic.
4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?
Sea of Love (Our Flag Means Death (TV)) (6,697 words)
Phoenix Fire (The Adventure Zone (Podcast)) (2,031 words)
Commit to the Bit (Our Flag Means Death (TV)) (2,471 words)
Dinner & Conversation (The Adventure Zone (Podcast)) (826 words)
I have begun to long for you (Our Flag Means Death (TV)) (4,185 words)
Yeah, ok, some fun reunion porn for the big fandom and a collab with two pretty popular writers for the small fandom make sense for that top two in particular.
5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?
I try to, especially since I don't get that many, and I love getting comments so much that I just want to share my appreciation. Sometimes the spoons are low, sometimes I don't know what to say except "thanks!" and if someone just commented on several chapters I might not do that for all of them.
6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?
Well, Phoenix Fire is the Worst Ending, aka the destruction of the entire universe, plus unbearably sad between the main characters, so yeah.
7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?
I do have quite a bit of fluffy fic (Commit to the Bit comes to mind, there's also a Fantasy Costco Kravitz/Taako that's very sweet), but I immediately thought of for the benefit of all the broken hearts, just because it takes an incredibly bittersweet ending of the fic it's fixing and says FUCK THAT, how can everyone get a happy ending instead?
8. Do you get hate on fics?
I've never gotten any, even managed to avoid the twitter wank that WFU got when I wrote fics of it! (long ago, I did get some vagueblogging about some stuff in my TAZ fic, but nothing ever addressed directly at me)
9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?
That is where I started and why I started (my first smutty fic is pretty bad imho but it was popular, relatively speaking, because for a bit there it was the only unlocked smut for that pairing); my original rarepair was M/F bi4bi in a complicated polycule, and so there's some them+others works in there. (readers of for the benefit of all the broken hearts are nodding along like "ok this tracks") beyond that, I'm just going to say go look at my work.
10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?
Is for the benefit of all the broken hearts (and the rest of that series) a crossover??????? Like I'm legitimately staring into space thinking about the boundary line between modern AU and RPF and........ HUH.
11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?
DO PEOPLE DO THAT
12. Have you ever had a fic translated?
Nope!
13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?
183 thousand words in a series: the only life you could save, with my beloved Ryn, when we were "just friends" - started as our attempt to co-write a reconciliation between Taako and Lucretia, and spun out into an entire timeline with themes spanning before the Stolen Century all the way into post-canon. Some pieces we wrote separately, much of it we wrote together. Even the last piece, which I published after Ryn died, includes a section that they wrote, about Taako trying to cope with Lucretia's death.
14. What’s your all time favorite ship?
Probably Mulder/Scully lol, tho I don't know if I've ever read any fic of them????
15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?
One of my very first TAZ fics was a Hurley/Sloane backstory fic that was going to be basically a beat-for-beat retelling of The Fast and the Furious (oh, I guess that's also sort of a crossover?), but I only ever wrote the first chapter. I would love to write it at some point, because I think it would be fun as hell.
I'd also love to finish my TAZ Amnesty fic, sweetness follows, which is friends-to-lovers post-canon Minerva/Duck.
16. What are your writing strengths?
Character voice, I think. Possibly a stupid depth of canon knowledge for whatever the canon is, and I think I have a knack for figuring out how to reincorporate those details. Honestly, it's hard for me to say "oh these are my strengths and weaknesses", or at least today I'm having trouble pinning that down.
17. What are your writing weaknesses?
Punctuation Pokemon, or rather, my sentences do get very tangly. I find endings really tricky, I've done a lot of work thinking through how to stick the landing. (This is one of the ways in which Ryn continues to live in my head, because they could always spot when I hadn't quite made it.)
18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?
Alas my Spanish (high school and college) is too rusty to even try, and I don't know any other languages.
19. First fandom you wrote for?
The Adventure Zone, although I wrote quite a bit of Agatha Christie pastiche in junior high, and a lot of Anne Rice influenced original fiction in high school and college.
20. Favorite fic you’ve written?
I love a lot of my fic, it's fun to go back and look and say "oh that!", and The Reckoning Arrives is up there, of course, because I loved writing it, and it saved my life. ("she's survived the impossible before" got me out of my marriage and 2 years later got me through the hospital. "you're here, so be here" got me through what came after that.)
But it does have to be for the benefit of all the broken hearts - she lives in my head, still, and I feel incredibly proud of all the work I put into it, the technical work, the emotional work.
---
Not tagging anybody, but PLEASE! if you feel like talking about your writing, do it!
#my writing#my fic#tag games#'sweetness follows' was a bit of a love letter to Ryn before I told them how I felt
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for the author asks, w blupjeans day 6 (family!), numbers 1 (What inspired you to write the fic this way?) and 5 (What part was hardest to write?) :O?? -ise
Anyone can send in questions from this ask game list here, or any other questions you may have too!! :3
What inspired you to write the fic this way?
I actually had the idea to write a ficlet about Lup asking Taako if it was possible for her to have a baby because she was pregnant before I even wrote my first official fic for this fandom. It was back when I was struggling to begin writing again, and I did actually write, like, half of it before I couldn't concentrate anymore, I hated how that little bit turned out. It was completely different from how I wrote the fic now, and now that I can look back on that experience, I think it was definitely not the right time for me to write at that point, and I came at it from the wrong angle. It was originally going to be a strictly Lup and Taako fic, but doing it from a slightly blupjeans angle definitely helped me. Also, another thing that inspired me to write it this time and the way that I did was because I remembered a series of art pieces someone did for a previous blupjeans week event that had the same family prompt that was about Lup and Barry's daughter being born and growing up, and I loved it so much and thought doing something with a similar subject would be a great idea. Also also, I loved the idea from this fic from Hali that the twins brush and braid each other's hair when the other is upset, and it loosens them up to be able to talk about it. I thought it was really cool, and I adopted that to my headcanon too :)
5. What part was the hardest to write?
It was actually really easy to write when I had a clearer picture of what I wanted to happen and who I wanted to be in the scenes. It's still a very Lup and Taako centric fic obviously, but having Barry actually being physically present in the background helped and having no one but Lup figure out what was happening before anyone else did helped a lot too lol I think the only trouble I had with it was trying to figure out Barry's reaction and that little scene there, but again, it wasn't that much. My only real concern was that I was afraid there wasn't enough blupjeans to count as a valid blupjeans week fic lol
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Taakitz #20? The coma one?
heads up--medical, hospital, mention of car crash (they'll be okay)
Medical equipment beeps in somber, hushed tones, and Taako stares at the plastic barriers on the sides of Kravitz’s hospital bed, letting his eyes unfocus and reality blur. It's easier to let the world go on without him, disconnecting from this horrible game he's losing and retreating back to solitaire.
He's got some time left before the nurse kicks him out again. If he's not obnoxious, he could stick around even longer. Things are busy at the hospital. They kind of forget the coma patients are even there.
It's been a week. Seven long fucking days. A hell Taako never thought he'd see. He was released five days ago with a cast and some sicknasty bruises, but that car accident knocked Kravitz’s soul straight into another reality. It could be a few more days. It could be years.
It could be over.
Not for the first time, or even the fiftieth, Taako’s eyes prickle with furious tears. He could take the driver of that fucking Kia apart with his teeth. He could commit the kind of crimes they make podcasts about. Try selling stamps and mattresses around this vengeful spray of viscera. Go ahead.
He'd been so fucking close, too.
Taako, I don't understand why you keep dating these creeps. It's so hard to watch you get treated this way.
Well, the thing is, Krav, I can't have what I want, so I might as well make myself miserable, yeah?
What do you want so bad you're willing to punish yourself this way?
They never saw that fucking Kia coming.
Taako knows where the tissues are, but he can't bring himself to reach for them. He aches all over, and not just from the crash. He figures if he blew his nose too hard he might black out. So he lets himself cry. What a mess. What a hideous, pathetic mess.
"You know, Krav, I wasn't… I wasn't even sad he broke up with me," Taako finds himself explaining, like talking out loud will give him some catharsis his goldfish ass brain won't find swimming in circles around the plastic castle between his ears. Inhumane. Who designed people? They need more room.
"I wasn't even upset," he repeats, his voice still hoarse and raspy. "Not about that. Sure, it fucking sucks to have to try again, to keep pretending. Fucking sucks. It's the worst kind of cycle and I can't get out, cause I would have to tell the truth and- and I'm so fuckin' scared that the worst will happen and I'll get rejected and ruin everything, cause- cause these assholes, they're easy to get over, but- but if I lost you-"
Taako angrily wipes tears from his face and curses under his breath as he brushes his stitches.
"But- but fuck, maybe- I don't know, maybe I already have lost you, maybe you're never coming back, maybe it's over and I have to figure out how to go on without you, and- and I don't think I can, Krav, I don't think I can look a world without you in the eyes. It's not just fuckin grief, you know? You're a chunk of my soul, you're a piece of my heart, I- I don't just love you a little, Krav. You mean everything to me. I don't think I'd be lost. I think I'd straight up pass away."
Taako leans forward and grips the plastic barrier too tightly, his shaking hand rattling it softly. He stares at his white knuckles and hates this, hates every single bit of it, and he almost shits himself when he hears a laugh, a low, halting rumble that he can feel in his veins.
"Fuck, Taako," Kravitz, Kravitz who should not even be conscious, says, barely a breath and yet a strong enough gale to blow Taako down. "You love me?"
Taako, tears streaming down his face, shocked beyond the ability to form a proper response, almost doesn't stop himself from hitting him.
"Yeah," he says instead, too shell shocked to lie.
"Oh, good," Kravitz whispers, closing his eyes again. "I love you. I'm glad we don't have to pretend anymore."
Taako could scream. He could jump up and down. He could run as fast as he can, skidding around corners, until he finds a nurse, because medically, truly, what the fuck. But he grips the plastic barrier and pushes himself up, and leans over Kravitz. And he kisses him so gently on the forehead.
"Me too," he manages. "Me too."
#medical#hospital#car crash#car accident#taz fic#taz#taakitz#tazb#the adventure zone#the adventure zone balance#fan5fics#taz balance#taakitz fic
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