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absolutebl · 2 months

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This Week in BL - It's 2024 & I'm talking about TayNew... really?

(They pretty much told us all to sit down and shut tf up, 'cause they got this. AND THEY DO.)

Organized, in each category, with ones I'm enjoying most at the top.

Feb 2024 Wk 3

Ongoing Series - Thai

Cherry Magic (Sat YouTube grey) ep 9 of 12 - I broke. In my defense, it was Monday, I needed comfort, and TayNew were right tf there. Ya know what? They are great in this show. It's a great adaptation. I might like it more than the JBL live action. You know why? Really, honestly WHY...?

That was a PHENOMENAL KISS. Those boys did Thailand fucking proud. They did fandom a solid. Thank you OGs for reminding us how it's done. I was getting used to SloppyHot. And SloppyHot has its place, but that TayNew rooftop kiss was a top tear class act. It was tender and sweet and respectful and joyful. It was eye work and breath work and years of practice. How very far BL has come while still staying so much the same. TayNew - I salute you!

(Read all about distribution issues here.)

The Sign (Sat YT) ep 12fin - we waiting, I guess? Bah.

Cooking Crush (Sun YT) ep 11 of 12 - The recipe book thing was so damn cute and I love a claiming. YOU KNOW I LOVE A CLAIMING!

In fact, I love OffGun.

I love food based BL.

I adored seeing a reboot of "the infamous dragging".

But I don’t love anything else about this show. Sigh.

1000 Years Old ep 1 of 12 - Finally we get our gay vampire BL from Feel Good Bangkok. Stars Shane (My Engineer) and fresh face Opal, directed by Champ (2gether). It’s kind of odd but enjoyable. A group of teen UFO seekers find a vampire instead. Opal looks a bit like a mix between Newnu + Leo (VIXX) - so cute + edge. Also, nice to see Shane again on our screens after so long.

Finally, I like the subtle (and sometimes not subtle) presence of ghosts permeating this show. Do the friends know she's there? Do they know she's dead? Is the existence of paranormal accepted but not that of aliens? Or are the two combined? Is this lazy writing or just fun world building? Who cares! It's enjoyable.

For Him (Thurs iQIYI) ep 12fin - the nail painting bit was very cutie queers and I've not seen it done in BL before, so that was nice. For some reason captions never dropped for me on this last episode, but it didn’t really matter. Not much happened and I understood everything anyway.

Quick pitch?

From the people who brought us Unforgotten Night based on a y-novel, about a young man nursing a heartbreak who has a one-night stand, but the other boy didn't want it to end. This turned out to be a pulp that wasn’t half as good as it should have been and even less memorable, but not terrible. 5/10 DON'T BOTHER unless you're v bored

City of Stars (Fri iQIYI) ep 3 of 12 - Oh it is such a pulp: the acting is not good and the script is terrible. Of course, I’m mildly enjoying it. Very good dream kissing. There's something appealing about these main characters - I think it's the moot crushes. We rarely get to see that. These days everything feels very one sided, this... isn't.

A Secretly Love (Thai WeTV) - Khonprot, a third-year hazer of the engineering faculty, has a secret crush on Pluem, a tsundere fourth-year head hazer. Over the years, he's seen Pluem cycle through girlfriends. Recently, after a public breakup, however, Khonprot thinks maybe a boy has a chance.

I tried but I can't get into my WeTV account anymore and I'm way too lazy to figure it out. I'll catch it grey if I can, since I've rebooted the bootlegging side of my BL life for Cherry Magic anyway.

So this show may stay in this section, or I may bump it down to "it's airing but..."

If anyone is watching it, let me know if it's good?

Ongoing Series - Not Thai

Love For Love's Sake (Korea Weds iQIYI) 7-8fin - Ugh it was GREAT, despite some pretty telling flaws. I ended up feeling like some of the filming was amateurish (very overworked low angles - director's first feature, I assume), and the narrative is a little disjoined and on the nose, AND the subs are clumsy (which I don't expect from KBL) BUT I still loved it. (FYI - I wouldn't be so harsh on a BL for this kinda thing except one from Korea.)

Quick pitch:

This isekai-based KBL is about a man who must win a game by convincing a reserved teen outcast to fall in love with him. Of course, that teen represents himself and his own unhappiness. Like many queer narratives, this show is actually about self worth, trust, and found family, and it is VERY on the nose. But I don’t expect subtlety from my BL and I enjoyed it's truly lovely redemption arc and earnest performances. While I found the narrative a touch disjointed with overworked filming angles and poorer than average captions, this is certainly much better than early KBL in terms of consistency of tone, script, and immersion. Highly rewatchable and charming, which counts for a lot. 9/10

Trigger warning for suicide depicted.

Perfect Propose (Japan Fri Gaga) ep 4 of 6 - Gosh, it’s so lovely. But I do just constantly want to give them both hugs.

AntiReset (Taiwan Fri Viki/Gaga) ep 4 of 10 - Oh look, Taiwan has created yet another BL where I spend most of the time watching it grinning like an idiot. Surprise surprise. The pet name thing was fucking adorable. Also Taiwan once more proving they come by their "kings of kissing" title honestly. I mean to say. In a week of good kisses this one was just... WOW.

On the other hand, some of the underpinning themes are starting to v worry me (ownership, consent, age), and we only just got started, and I don't trust this production company so... I have concerns.

But also... YAY KISSES!

(I'm made of weak moral fiber.)

Although I Love You and You AKA Sukiyanen Kedo Do Yaro ka (Japan Thurs Gaga) ep 6 of 10 - Like many other shows on this list. I just enjoy it the most when the two leads are on screen together. So this episode was kind of lacking because they were apart for most of it. I also am starting to agree with the tone of the plot, that maybe they ARE better off as friends not lovers. (And I'm sure I'm not supposed to want that.) Oh Japan, must you?

My Strawberry Film (Japan Gaga) ep 1 of 8 - Oh it’s good. In the arthouse lane so don’t expect sweetness & light or an HEA. If there’s no cartoon aspect to a JBL, there’s usually no joy. But it is certainly good. Teens uncover some old film and a mystery around a pretty girl. The background music is wildly annoying (and rarely in the background).

It's Done

What Did You Eat Yesterday Season 2 AKA Kinou Nani Tabeta? Season 2 (Japan Gaga) 10 eps - will binge when I have any spare time. 2024 is crazy busy for me so far.

The Servant and the Young Master - from Vietnam, it's on YouTube. I will give it a try when I have a window of time.

Began Beginning (Myanmar YouTube) - A Burmese BL? @heretherebedork vouched for it, so I will give it a watch.

7 Days Before Valentine (Weds WeTV) - Gave me Luminous Solution vibes have decided not to watch.

It's Airing But...

Dead Friend Forever (Thai iQIYI) - rumors are it's interesting. I'm waiting to know how it ends.

Ossans Love Season 2 (Japan Gaga) - 5 years later, will anything have changed? This is Japan so… probubly not. I won't be watching this. I disliked Season one and actively hated the follow ups. No thank you.

Playboyy (Thurs Gaga) 14 eps - Dear Playboyy, it's not you, it’s me… I hate you. You’re about as deep (and as palatable) as a shot glass of cum. While I'm sure you’re someone’s kink, you're my weakest link. Goodbye. I DNFed this at ep 5. Frankly I'm impressed with myself for getting that far.

Time the series (Tue Gaga/YT) 10 eps - dropped it at ep 4.

Next Week Looks Like This:

2/24 Unknown (Taiwan Youku) 12 eps - Older brother tough guy breadwinner looks after his sister and defacto adopted little brother. Little bother falls in love with him and is sent away after a stolen kiss. But when he comes back…

Sam Lin has a cameo so even if I wasn't already excited, I'm in. We should be on our guard though, Taiwan will occasionally go edgy, dark, and sad... this could go there.

One assumes GMMTV is filling in the BL time slot with something queer on their YT Channel after Cooking Crush ends, they gonna lose subs if they don't. But I've not been paying attention to the chatter so I don't know which of their line-up it will be. I think G4 are filming/off radar now, and Earth is in that het noona thing? Plus they gotta sort out the IP for MIx-Up and Ossen. So it won't be one of the announced adaptations. They'll hold My Golden Blood for the high season, so I think it'll be one of the lesser known lead-outs. Wandee or Only Boo maybe? But they only just started filming those. Are we getting our long awaited GL? Anything else left from 2023 that I forgot about?

Upcoming BLs for 2024 are listed here. This list is not kept updated, so please leave a comment if you know something new or RP with additions.

THIS WEEK’S BEST MOMENTS

Two crawling kisses from Thailand this week. Now this is a fetish I didn't know I had. Turns out, we love this one! (*waves hand in air* I speak for all of us now.)

Cooking Crush

City of Stars

Possibly the best tsundere to cinnamon roll pivot we've had in a long time.

Also the best asshole to KING pivot. Could we have a whole drama staring this character now? Please?

And finally our sunshine learning to love himself.

SIGH. what a lovely show.

And a good SMILEY kiss from a KBL.

And then some cute cuddles? Korea is spoiling me these days. I'm catching expectations now. What's next? Japan learns to kiss in their light BLs? Ha! I kill me.

(All Love for Love's Sake).

(Last week)

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redgoldsparks · 6 months

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I recently had the opportunity to attend a screening of the documentary No Straight Lines: The Rise of Queer Comics (in which I have a 30 second cameo appearance) hosted by my friend and fellow cartoonist Shay Mirk. They made this wonderful interactive zine for the attendees to fill out as we watched the film. Because I've seen the film twice before, I spent a lot of the time really going all out in my zine-doodling. I'm really happy with the result! Transcript below the cut. The all-caps writing is Shay and the mixed lower case writing is mine.

instagram / patreon / portfolio / etsy / my book / redbubble

Page 1 (cover): I watched the movie No Straight Lines: The Rise of Queer Comics and all I got was this silly zine!

Page 2: If I started a queer comix magazine, it would be called: GENDER QUEER: PAST PRESENT AND FUTURE

Page 3: Portrait of me as an underground comix artist in the 1970s (portrait of Maia looking like an Oscar Wilde flower child)

Page 4: Quotes I loved from the movie:

"I didn't know who would read this weird book." -Alison Bechdel

"I felt so embraced by the queer comics community." -Rupert Kinnard

"A lesser man would need a hammer." -Scott (Rupert's partner)

"Queer comics have created space for complexity." -Ajuan Mance

Page 5: One thing I learned:

"The movie is just as good the 3rd time!" -Maia

Page 6: My gender identity is (check all that apply):

_ Blob

_ Frog

_ Unknowable cloud of darkness

_ (fill in your own): Glam, gay, space, wizard, elf! (Drawing of Maia in a rainbow wizard hat, starry vest, knee length pants, striped socks, pointed purple shoes and waist length cape)

Page 7: Here is a gift I would like to give Alison Bechdel: The ability to teleport (this is also the gift I want so I can live rurally but visit my friends!) (Drawing of the planet earth with teleportation lines crisscrossing it)

Page 8: No one knows what LGBTQIA actually stands for... (fill in your own):

Let's

Back

Queer Utopia Land

In our

Amazing spaceship!

(Drawing of a cute spaceship in a sky full of stars)

#zine #no straight lines #queer comics #maia kobabe #queer comics history

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breadvidence · 6 months

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Please mind the #wineposting tag. Regardless: are you asking, "Should I watch this adaptation of Les Misérables?" I'll give you advice, though I suspect if you are reading this blog post you have watched all of these anyway (and quite possibly a few more, besides!).

'25 (Fescourt): Probably! If you are a Brick fan none of the adaptation choices will startle you, but having visuals to go with key scenes is a treat. This is a loyal piece. Toulout as Javert, Gabrio as Valjean, Milovanoff as Fantine, and Nivette as Éponine all give excellent performances. Be prepared for a lukewarm Cosette. You might struggle with silent film conventions, length, and French intertitles.

'34 (Bernard): Probably! This is a fairly loyal adaptation of the Brick that makes internally consistent choices where it deviates from its source (sometimes it has goofy continuity errors—politely ignore). Baur as Valjean and Gaël as Cosette give fabulous performances. Moments of silliness do not detract from the quality. Another long haul.

'35 (Boleslawski): Probably not. As an adaptation of Les Misérables this film is bad. That being said, Charles Laughton is a lauded actor, and you can't say he didn't put his whole laughussy into his performance. Because it is accessible and prominent, a lot of LM fans will have seen this film, and you might benefit from shared context if you're in fandom. Speaking personally, I'm glad I saw it, but I'm not sure you will be.

'52 (Milestone): No. Most likely based on '35 rather than on the book, this film is also a bad adaptation of Les Misérables. There are no notable performances. Because it is accessible, this is another adaptation many fans are familiar with, but understanding jokes about Valjean's boyfriend Robert and Javert's sentient hat probably don't justify sitting through the movie.

'58 (Le Chanois): No. Not the English dub, at least. "Bland" is the word of the day. Contemporary French audiences wildly disagree with me per Wikipedia.

'72 (Bluwal): Strong maybe. If you are an intense fan of the Brick, yes. Its use of a narrator to draw from the novel directly and its focus on the Amis makes this adaptation unique on this list. You might not end up liking it but you will have had an experience. If you have zero investment in Les Misérables but are still reading this post for some reason: no, do not watch this.

'78 (Jordan): At some point I will talk about this film and not make a gay joke but today is not that day. If you are not queer, get off my blog, you cis straight, begone. Everyone else: yes, watch this movie, c'mon. Perkins. That performance. At some point I need to make a serious post about queerness and '78 but right now all I've got is Javert's literal on-screen boner. Jesus Christ. Not a great adaptation of the novel but a virtuoso example of unintentional homoeroticism.

'82 (Hossein): No. This is an odd little adaptation without the charisma of a '35 or '78, somehow not as bad as either of those but not as good either. The GIF of the Amis walking in heavy wind is the best this film has to offer.

'98 (August): No—but I stared into my wine glass for a long, long time before typing those two letters. If we are judging adaptations by how they handle the source material, this is a disaster. As a film? I'm sure entertained. I call it bitchslap Les Mis. I should note here I am also a huge fan of Uma Thurman. Possibly I should recuse myself. I don't know, pal. IDK.

2012 (Hooper): I dwell bitterly on the fact that this is our film version of the musical. Brick fans are restless, musical fans are restless. People who first encountered Les Mis via this version are making feral noises. I'm afraid. I'm moving on.

2018 (Davies): It's really unfortunate that I am at my most drunk while commenting on this adaptation. Sure, watch it, it's one of those BBC series that has watchability sheerly because of production value and proximity to contemporary narrative/film expectations/standards. Personally I hate it. My partner is so tired of the tone in which I utter the syllables "Oyelowo".

The Musical: yes c'mon. Bootleg that good bitch.

#les mis #les misérables #wineposting

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ellestra · 5 months

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Farming content James Somerton style

Edited: I cleaned up sentences, removed typos and added some links

You've probably seen the latest hbomberguy video that highlights plagiarism problem on youtube. He gives several examples many I never heard about but I've been recommended iilluminaughtii before and watched some of her stuff before getting tired of seemingly endless volume (now I know why). But then he gets to the real subject of the video and I did watch a lot of James Somerton videos. And I liked many of them. I liked them a lot.

I didn't give him any money and, as much as it came as relief, I kept thinking how this must feel so much worse for people who did. I thought about supporting him for a moment when he posted (in April this year!) how his videos are getting less views because youtube algorithm and demonetisation of gay creators (it's a real thing so it was easy to believe) and he will be forced to stop creating if people don't sign up to his patreon. But I was casual viewer and he seemed big enough so I didn't. It must feel like such a betrayal to those who created a real community around him. Just like his film production company it's clear now it was another of his scams. It's infuriating how well it worked.

Somerton deleted his patreon now (along with his twitter and discord server) so there is probably no recourse for those affected. The only good thing is that someone big enough highlighted what he did (and brought receipts) so he had to stop. When smaller creators called him out it either went unnoticed or he managed to make himself a victim (and send his fans after them). He actually did what Anita Sarkeesian was accused of and gaslighted his followers about it. His misogyny just adds an extra bitter taste to this.

youtube

At the end hbomberguy talks about how if Somerton was open about what he was doing this could've been his niche. He said it just as I was thinking basically the same thing. I'm sure there is a market for field review type of videos. Not review like movie or book review but in academic sense when you take other people articles on the subject and compare to show the state of research on the subject on at the moment.

youtube

This kind of reviews doesn't need any original research. The value is in giving people overview of where the field is at and pointing them to the actual research so they can read more in depth about the results. If you already did the search for all the sources this is a perfect format to use them. Most people don't have time or resources to comb through all the resources themselves but they like to learn about it and this is why videos like that are popular. That's why iilluminaughtii, Somerton and al. were able to cash in on it.

But of course this kind of things have to properly cited. And they cannot be just all quotes. You have to make coherent points not just make stuff up for the transitions (lies that actually made Todd in the Shadows make a video not about music). I suppose that's too much work. Too much effort when you need to crank out content to satisfy all the sponsors.

youtube

I was glad to find out I already watch most of the queer creators recommended in the hbomberguy's video (and put on this watch list) as an alternative (I would add Caelan Conrad to it - funnily enough I found them through their video about antivax movement). I trained my youtube recommendations well in which way it skews but it's easier to kick out all the obviously awful when you know what talking points to avoid. It's much harder to spot grift when it pretends to care about the same things you care about. Somerton was saying all the right things. It just wasn't his words.

Did he even believe any of it? I bet he'll insist on yes but the laziness says otherwise. It seems like it was all just for the money and fans this angle gave him. That he enjoyed being cool to the audience he built and the stuff it bought him. Be gay do crime for real. Only he didn't write that one either.

#hbomberguy #james somerton #youtube drama #youtube plagiarism #todd in the shadows #archeology tube #james somerton conman #james somerton scam #youtube #plagiarism

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drdemonprince · 5 months

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reading American Psycho for the first time because I loved the musical so dang much (having watched the Chicago, Broadway, and West End versions, and left comments about it on Duncan Sheik's instagram, he only has 10k followers so I hope he Notices me) and... it really is so funny. How silly BEE denies that he wrote Bateman to be gay. This man is the most Autistic gay man ever committed to paper. Full gayness and autism as narcissism swag. When I first saw the film I horrified my straight boyfriend of the time by telling him I kinda related to Bateman in some ways but now that I've seen an actual gay man funnel all the intensity of queer repression into the role on stage (great work Kyle Patrick of Kokandy Productions) and read much of the book, it's unreal how autism swag gay swag no empathy swag this shit is. its also all so goddamned POINTLESS and silly. its amazing something so nihilistic and goofy became such a success as movie.

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olderthannetfic · 9 months

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The main problem that I have with Youtubers who attempt to approach media analysis and fandom through theory and academia is that the vast majority aren't academics. Just being in undergrad isn't actually enough, contrary to the thoughts of many. Reading a Wikipedia article and reiterating what one may find in some Google, even Google Scholar, searches. Ideally, these would be topics approached by people involved in academia as a profession, people with doctoral degrees, who can discuss complex topics in a way that is easily understood by the masses. "What is the negotiation between gender and sex in BL?" "How does CMBYN articulate/complicate hierarchal roles within the gay novel?" "Could SnK express an alternative reading of the formerly isolated Japan?" These are complicated questions they attempt to answer in their video essays when they seldom ever understand the theories they employ.

Yes, I understand this can sound elitist, but as a Black afab person who is currently in a doctoral program for literature, there aren't "easy" answers to any of the questions they attempt to pose, and many Youtubers who primarily make long-form video essays lack the life experience and expertise to sufficiently discuss anything. They're usually too set in their thoughts to answer or explore the broader implications of their claims. Defending a dissertation forces you to do this. Forming a committee of experts in various fields and convincing them to aid you in the development of your dissertation forces you to do this. Being in academic and cordial communication with your peers from all over the world in your field forces you to do this. It's not easy to constantly intake new information from various eras and nations (depending on your topic), meld this information into a coherent essay, and continually make edits as you learn new information, thus changing your outlook on things. Also: it's really petty of me, but it's also incredibly annoying to grade poorly researched undergrad essays who, after some prompting in office hours, say they got these ideas on books, movies, and shows from breadtubers like Somerton, SZ, FD Signifier, or hbomberguy. Cue: me going to watch their videos and realizing they have no idea what they're talking about 88% of the time in terms of theory and application of said theory. Even the ones who frame themselves on being educators in real life, like Signifier, lack any nuance, depth, or media literacy to make a compelling argument if you know even the slightest bit of information. On the bright side, I now know why I've encountered several students with ideologies that are basically conservatism with a veneer of progressivism, or "conservatism in a queer hat."

This concludes my long-winded way of saying "Don't turn to Youtubers for media analysis. You're better off just reading articles by people who have to actually know what they're talking about. The majority of Youtubers (especially the breadtubers) don't have the bandwidth to discuss anything more complex than an episode of Blue's Clues."

I mostly agree, but I'd point to a slightly different problem. I'm hesitant to say that the PhD itself is the deciding factor, but I do think a lot of video essayists are insufficiently prepared.

I'm a big fan of Folding Ideas who does have some formal schooling in film, but I don't think it's that education per se that makes him great. He sets himself apart from other video essayists by actually doing his research and having an in-depth approach to his subjects. He doesn't resort to clickbait, and—here's the key—he often takes months or even a year to work on something.

Honestly, I think that's a big part of it: the hoops most youtubers who want to make a living at it have to jump through involve a lot of clickbait and pandering and a fast production schedule. They don't involve reputable peer review except by the court of shriek-y public opinion on twitter.

They'd like to present themselves as documentary filmmaking (which is essentially what Folding Ideas' longer videos are), but they don't actually live up to any of the usual standards of that either.

I think it can be elitist to say that someone needs to have certain letters after their name, yes, but what really strikes me about your average youtube media analysis type and the fanbase is that they want shortcuts.

Exploring the whole history of the gay novel so that you have enough background to talk about CMBYN means reading quite a few novels. Even if you decide to throw out all past scholarly opinion on the topic (which you shouldn't), if you're going to have a meaningful personal theory, you need to have read a lot of novels first. How can you hope to be the person providing the neat overview of the whole genre if you haven't familiarized yourself widely with said genre, and not just through a summary by someone else? That amount of reading doesn't happen overnight.

The trite, surface-level media analysis online is often from people who want to be hailed as great intellectuals but who aren't willing to put in the years it takes to do all the background reading and to develop their skills in argumentation, writing, etc.

Grad school is a convenient and probably faster way to go about all that, but I think you could do it outside of a formal framework... But you would need to actually do it.

I think it's driven by a bunch of people who were The Smart One in grade school and never learned how to work hard on long-term projects instead of pushing through in a sprint. They're used to relying on being the smartest to cut corners and do things before they get bored, only they probably aren't the smartest anymore anyway, and they mistake being smart at one thing for being smart at all things.

There's a real lack of respect for the entire concept of expertise.

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breathe-rainbow · 7 months

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💌 WANTED: new queer friends 💌

You would be ideal for this role if:

- you have an unnatural obsession with fictional gay characters (bonus point if you have new tv/film recs)

- you also find yourself on tumblr in the middle of a random Tuesday afternoon

- you agree that meeting new people in your 20s is surprisingly hard… like why?

- you enjoy the outdoors and/or sports

- you love the cosy season, chilling at home on a rainy afternoon watching feel good shows or reading a good book

If the above criteria doesn’t fit you, we’d still love to hear from you.

If you’d like to apply for this role either message the above user directly or react to this post and the user will be in touch shortly.

please and thank you. 💖

EDIT: okay folks, this got way more notes than I thought it would so apologies if I haven’t reached out! Send me a message though if you want to chat! ☺️

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ardourie · 2 months

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the worst part imo is the number of white queers who ONLY watched Moonlight bc it's a Queer Movie. I just watched if beale street could talk again recently & it's bananas asking people I know & work with if they've seen it (especially if I know they watched & enjoyed Moonlight) and they're just like.. what the fuck is that. and I'm like oh it's one of the best movies I've ever seen, by the guy who did Moonlight. & it's based on a James Baldwin book you should also definitely read & I can let you borrow it if you want. and their next question is "is it gay too" and I have to try to explain from one queer to another that black stories don't have to be gay to be important

its rlly a double edged sword like i want nonblacks to care about queer stories from nonwhites but like u said it often devolves into only caring if its gay vs not caring at all bc of it being black, like both extremes suck and its so frustrating 😭 i dont understand anyone that needs a hook or a relatable aspect to watch movies bc when u do that u miss out on so much good in the world, slightly unrelated but i remember when the parasite director said so many ppl r missing amazing films bc they refuse to read subtitles and its just an overarching issue of white stories being valued above all despite there being no heightened quality or intellect from white film compared to brown ones

#💌

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wen-kexing-apologist · 10 months

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Bengiyo's Queer Cinema Syllabus

A few months back I was chatting with @bengiyo when the subject of queer cinema came up (unsurprising considering…ya know, the whole being BL buddies thing). As a semi-recent queerness realizer, and a Certified Baby Gay(™), Ben took it upon himself to share a post between himself and @shortpplfedup that inspired @the-conversation-pod and which also included a Completely Hypothetical Queer Cinema Syllabus Build Up to BL for Baby Gays. According to @bengiyo this started as a thought experiment.

But, unfortunately or…fortunately? for him, I constantly crave queer media, and @waitmyturtles and her Old GMMTV Challenge have inspired me to try my hand at working my way through this syllabus. I cannot guarantee that I will finish all these films. I have no idea how long it would even take, but I wanted to at least try!

I have been saying I would do this for months now, but I am inundated with BL content, and getting more every day, so I have been pushing it to the side. BUT! This evening a local movie theater played The Birdcage (1996) and I went and bought tickets and decided now was as good a time as any to get this started, I am hoping to take a page out of Turtle’s book and write notes/thoughts on the movies I end up watching. Forgive me the long winded introduction, but I figured some context would be nice if this ends up being a thing I stick with. So without further ado…

The Birdcage (1996) [Comedy]

Syllabus Unit 6: Gems

Summary: A gay cabaret owner and his drag queen companion agree to put up a false straight front so that their son can introduce them to his fiancée's right-wing moralistic parents.

Characters: Armand: Gay cabaret owner, played by Robin Williams Arnold: Drag queen partner, played by Nathan Lane Val: Armand’s son, played by Dan Futterman Agador: Armand and Arnold's maid? friend? live in slutty pool boy? played by Hank Azaria Katharine: Val's biological mother, played by Christine Baranski

Overall Reflection

This is a film I had never seen before. Hell, I didn’t even know it existed until around the time Ben shared his syllabus, and someone reblogged a scene from it that ended up on my dashboard. This was an interesting film to experience in theaters, because while watching with an audience made the funny bits funnier, there were also moments that I absolutely did not read as funny that other people did, and I didn’t know how I felt about that.

This film is set primarily in South Beach, Florida and partly in a drag club, which meant that the only thing I could think about whenever the drag club was on screen was Palace, the gay bar, drag brunch, queer club spot in Miami. On the other funny casual note, as a Floridian I feel seen by the moment where Katharine calls and says she’s going to be late, and it zooms out to show she is stuck at the bridge. Real.

I feel like the majority of gay media I have consumed in my life very much centers around two very masculine characters. So it was really nice to watch a story that involved more femme characters, and that the femme characters were not left as the butt of the joke. Which I recognize might be ironic considering this is a comedy and therefore there are jokes abound. But, when you compare the femme character in something like Legally Blonde, to the femme characters here, they are allowed to be dramatic, and they are allowed to trip and fall, but the love that Armand has for Arnold is palpable, they squabble and they get annoyed at each other, and they hurt each other, but they are partners, and they love each other too, and it shows throughout the film.

This sounds fucked up, I guess, but I love the undercurrent of pain that is threaded throughout the story. The way that Val starts off seeming like he is very content with the way he grew up, the parents that he had. The way that Val feels so so loved by his Dads, and he hurts them anyway. Because he is scared, because he loves Barbara and he knows that she is good, and that her parents aren’t, and that he has to hide his family. But in making them hide who they are, he is hurting them and at first you can see and feel the ways that Armand is trying to rebel against it. You can tell that initially he is angry, disappointed, upset, incredulous:

“Yes, I wear foundation. Yes, I live with a man. Yes, I'm a middle- aged fag. But I know who I am, Val. It took me twenty years to get here, and I'm not gonna let some idiot senator destroy that. Fuck the senator, I don't give a damn what he thinks.”

gifs by @hellboys

It is one of my favorite lines in the film. Because Val needs to be called out on exactly what he is asking his father to do for him. Because Armand's pain is visceral in this moment. But Armand loves his son and so eventually he relents.

Arnold’s presence and importance in Val’s life are constantly disregarded and he is allowed to be upset, and Armand is allowed to constantly put his son’s engagement and wedding in jeopardy to prioritize his partner and his partner’s feelings, because Arnold is a part of this family, and to hide him away is unfair.

I certainly had to grapple with some complicated emotions around the character of Val. I could understand where he was coming from, that he loves his fiancee and that their families have to meet, and that it is almost certainly physically safer for everyone if his parents are not visibly and obviously queer around the ultra conservative moralist senator. But the ways he ends up exhibiting casual disdain, anxiety, and judgment around the aspects of his parents’ home, his parents’ friends, his parents’ themselves makes me kinda hate him a little bit. It is hard for me not to see Val as entitled, not to consider him low-key dickish, because of how frequently he seems to get annoyed and disappointed that Armand and Arnold are not acting straight enough, that their house isn’t straight enough, that their family isn’t straight enough. But the film does not shy away from the mental toll it takes.

Were there aspects of the film itself I didn’t like? Honestly, not really. There are some jokes and terminology that do not fully stand the test of time, so if I watch it with a modern lens I think I would give it a 9.5. If I watch it in the context of the time it was written, I would probably give it a 9.8. But watching it in theaters certainly altered the way I engaged in certain scenes.

Mostly with the “I know what you’re thinking. You’re thinking dressed like this, I’m even more obvious” scene.

gif by @rosalie-starfall

Because people in the theater were laughing during this moment. Which is not to say I am judging them, I’m not mad at them for finding the moments leading up to that scene funny. I can understand how Arnold constantly having to catch himself and change his body language could come off as funny. But there is a weight to that scene for me that made the laughter feel incongruous. It is, in my opinion, an incredibly impactful scene. And it was hard for me to fully embrace that moment the way I know I would have if I was alone, after I realized that not everyone reads that scene as a serious one.

(Side Note: When I was looking for pictures of the movie poster, I found three different versions of it, and I chose the one above because it was the most intriguing to me in the way it presents Arnold. Because it is the only one of the posters that puts Arnold in a suit.)

The other moment, that I think I would have had a stronger response to if I was alone, was the moment near the end where Val takes off Arnold’s wig and introduces Arnold as his mother.

gif by @nicholasbritel

If I had watched this scene alone, I think there is a very high likelihood I would have gotten teary eyed during that moment. Because Val has spent so much time throughout this film trying to hide Arnold away. Wanting to send him off for the evening so they didn’t have to worry, trying to replace him with his biological mother, who he had never really met just for the sake of maintaining appearances.

Arnold LOVES Val. It is glaringly obvious from the first moment they share a screen that to Arnold, that is his kid. And I cannot imagine what it must have felt like for Arnold to literally have his every move critiqued and criticized for acceptable levels of gayness by his son and his partner. To feel unwanted by his son and his partner. To feel replaced by his son and his partner. He deserves to see and hear his son choose him, to know that Val considers Arnold his parent. Especially when Val’s biological mother is standing right there.

And as for the comedy aspect of this movie? I mean, it’s Robin WIlliams and Nathan Lane so it is obviously going to be a truly hilarious film all the way through.

gif by @argentinosaurus

Where does it fall in my By, For, About Queers Categorization?

For and About

Any piece of media that places queer characters at the center of it is something I would categorize as “About Queers”

As far as I can tell, the writers and director are not queer. I consider films to be made By Queers when a queer person has a role in controlling how the story unfolds, usually this means a writer or director for me, actors too if they have any influence over changing the story. (As an example, The Last of Us Episode 3 would be something that I would place in a By Queers category because Murray Bartlet who played Frank is gay and also was consulted to shape the way the characters were written and the story played out.) While Nathan Lane is gay, and I am sure a number of actors who play side characters are as well, I do not know how much influence they had over the film itself. Which is why I am currently excluding it from the By Queers categorization.

And as for the For Queers aspect? That moment where Arnold appears in a suit and tie before the dinner party, where he appears so much more obviously gay when he’s in “masculine clothes” that is written for the people who understand. The undercurrent of pain I mentioned, that exists to be recognized by the people who understand. Also, I watched this at the movie theater and I saw what kind of crowd it drew lmfao.

Favorite moment in the film?

Well, I could go sappy with it and pick one of the scenes I referenced above, but I would be lying. My absolute, hands down, no contest favorite moment in this film was seeing Agador in this cropped tank top:

gif by @thevelvetgoldmine

Now, I know that Ben told me that the Units could be done in any order, but I think I want to start from Unit 1 and work my way through from there, so stay tuned for a write-up about Pariah (2011) from Unit 1: Coming of Age Post Moonlight.

#the birdcage #robin williams #nathan lane #bengiyo queer cinema syllabus #wka long post #queer stories #queer #lgbtqia

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paperbackribs · 5 months

Text

The Gift (15 of 15)

previous: Chapter 14 The Boy Next Door Ao3 Link

Last chapter, the boys finally hashed out their feelings with Eddie revealing that he had been in love with Steve from the very beginning. This chapter, Robin just wants to watch their film in peace but a vision from the ethereal finally reveals the missing pieces about the mysterious origin of the connection.

Chapter 15 La Vie En Rose (Final Chapter)

“It’s black and white,” Steve explains, worried that Eddie won’t want to watch the film if it’s not in colour.

“I get it, like The Twilight Zone,” Eddie catches the M&M that Robin throws at him with his wide mouth, his teeth chomping shut in a way that is disturbingly attractive to Steve.

Robin cheers from Steve’s living room armchair and then throws a tan-coloured M&M in the air to herself, only for it to bounce off her cheek and fall into the crease between the cushions. She frowns while digging it out.

Steve pushes his hair back before pushing the VHS into the player. “No, it’s a romance. But a classic,” he quickly adds.

Eddie eyes him from the right side of the couch, “I like romance. Why else do you think Sam followed Frodo all the way to Mordor?”

“Uh, because the world was going to end?” Steve answers, confused. Did they watch the same movie?

Robin snorts, “Even I got the undertones, Steve. How’d you miss it. Following your ‘friend’ to the ends of the earth; that practically screams gay yearning.”

Steve throws himself onto the couch, bouncing against Eddie. Feeling happy to press the length of his arm and hips against Eddie in a way he hadn't dared to only weeks ago. “I just figured they were best friends.” He points at her, “I even thought that I would be your Sam.” Eddie shifts his arm to drape across Steve's shoulders, pulling him into his embrace.

Robin screws her nose up, “No, thank you. Though,” she says, showing her hivemind loyalty. “It is easier to read the subtext in the books rather than in a kid’s film with weird voices.” Steve claps his hands in appreciation and she points back at him in acknowledgement.

“Stevie,” Eddie interrupts, fond exasperation evident in his tone. “Yes, I love The Lord of the Rings, but I kept trying to get you to watch films about friends who could be lovers.”

He nods at Robin as she sings out, “Ben Hur and his former bestie.” She catches the M&M this time.

“Or,” Eddie adds clearly thinking of Conan and Rocky, “About hot, shirtless men to see what your type might be. I was trying to feel you out.”

Steve mentally compares his reaction between the two movie nights, wondering whether his interpretation of Frodo and Sam may have been different if he had watched it after he realised his feelings for Eddie.

It’s not like he’s any more queer now that he’s with Eddie than he was before, but perhaps his pushing back on the idea of romance at their own end of the world had skewed his willingness to see the clues in front of him. For sure what that’s happened, he reflects, considering that he hadn’t seen the dance he was doing around Eddie until the visions had started connecting them.

Steve and Eddie had had enough conversations since their confessions that he no longer felt so stupid about his cluelessness. Eddie had been wary of pushing for more and Steve hadn't realised how much more he had really wanted. But that was in the past, so Steve accepts how unaware he'd been about Frodo and his buddy slash potential lover with a relaxed shrug before deciding to turn this to his favour.

He shuffles into Eddie's side, nudging Eddie's long hair out of the way with his nose to murmur lowly into his ear; the delicate curve reddens under his hot breath, “I told you exactly how I wanted to ‘feel you out’ during Rocky Horror.”

Eddie licks his lips and Steve feels his gaze draw down heavily, as if weighted by gravity to focus and lock onto that slicked pout. Eddie notices his distraction and his eyes slowly heat; he sways a hairs-breath into Steve's space as if to pull him down into that gravity and draw him into a sweet, heavy kiss.

Steve considers, just for a moment, cancelling movie night. That is, until a candy covered chocolate beans him at the back of his head, snapping him out of the charged moment he was sharing with his tempting boyfriend.

“Hey!” He whips his head around to scowl at Robin who smiles blandly at him and says, “No Horny Olympics; you promised.”

“Where’s Vickie,” Steve asks in retaliation, sneakily reminding her of the embarrassing incident when he’d walked in on her and her girlfriend in the breakroom two days ago.

She scowls back at him, “She’s coming next week.”

Steve is considering the value in pointing out the slight blush covering Robin's cheeks when Eddie calmly interjects, “Remind me about the plot.”

Steve turns back to Eddie. “Okay, Audrey Hepburn is this beautiful girl who falls for, like, the worst shit rag all because she’s got this narrow vision of what she’s allowed to have, right?”

Eddie hums in agreement, eyes crinkled in amusement.

“But then she gets to experience the world and comes back as this sophisticated woman. And she was already lovely because, come on, it’s Audrey Hepburn, but she comes back and she’s breathtaking, right? And the shit rag gets all caught up in chasing her, even though he has a fiancé.”

“Like a cheating horndog,” Robin interrupts.

Steve points to her in agreement before returning to Eddie, excited to share about the film that he’s come to love. “But it’s all getting in the way of the family business, which is when Bogart gets involved.”

“I like Humphrey Bogart, he's handsome,” Eddie says mildly, a hint of fondness etched at the sides of his indulgent smile.

“He’s okay,” Steve agrees. “But the romance is in watching him fall hopelessly in love while he doesn’t even realise he’s doing it. I won’t give away how it happens, but it’s satisfying to see him fall all over himself for her.”

Eddie tugs a lock of Steve’s hair before gently smoothing it behind his ear. “Sounds nice, let’s watch it, shall we?”

They press play, but in an eerie echo of weeks past Eddie abruptly points to the screen as Sabrina moves to close the French-style windows of her Paris apartment, “What is that song?”

Steve and Robin’s heads fly to look at each other, mouths open in shock.

“Why,” Robin asks, slowly.

Eddie watches them like he knows that something is wrong. “I’ve had this song at the back of my head for ages. And I haven’t been able to work it out. I mean, listen to it, it’s not exactly metal, right?” He pauses to listen further, “It is nice, though.”

“It’s Le Vie En Rose,” Steve shares. “I’ve been hearing it in the ethereal ever since I brought you back.”

Eddie frowns, “Is this about the connection?” Steve had explained his experiences with Eddie’s vision, which had resulted in some delightful experimentations. But he hadn’t bothered to talk about the music, other than to mention the humming, as he figured it was a matter between him and the ethereal, not anything to truly do with Eddie and their shared sight.

Steve flops back into his seat, staring blankly at the television. “It must be.” But he doesn’t know how or why. “It’s not dangerous,” he says with a conviction that comes with Knowing, “It just...”

He holds his hand up to them to give him a minute and allows his eyes to become further unfocused, sinking deeper into a muted world that opens up before him.

The music that no longer plays on the paused tape rises from the screen, transforming from what was once tinny and small to a collection of notes and melodies that feel physical as they weave around his body. The sun is warm on his back and the smell of herbs hang reassuringly in the air.

“You did well, Stevie.”

He looks down as Nana releases his hands from the box-step they are practising, her head only reaching his shoulders. She is wearing a peasant dress that hangs to her knees with wide prints of carnations and daisies stretched across it. Her feet are bare. Nana reaches up to pinch his cheek gently, but firmly.

“Ouch, Nana!” He says reflexively, rubbing at his face even though it doesn’t sting.

“It took you long enough. Look at you, big enough to fill a room but not yet smart enough to look into the ethereal and just ask.” Steve is uncannily reminded of his mother’s tone when she had grilled him about making The Sacrifice.

“I looked at the tapestries,” he protests.

“Hmph,” Nana moves over to the old wireless, turning the knob to lower the sound of Le Vie En Rose as it starts to play again.

“Where are we?” Steve asks.

“Where we were,” she responds simply.

“I told you, a long time ago, Stevie. That you could make your own steps, but I Saw you waffling on so badly that I made sure you would have me to guide you when the time came. You were very slow,” she continues to scold, getting further into her huff, Steve thinks.

She points a wooden spoon in his face that wasn’t in her hands a moment ago. “I do not huff,” she grumbles.

“Your Nonno used to say something similar, but that does not mean he was right. You two, so stubborn. No matter how many times I told him not to eat all the ricotta before the ravioli was made, he would still get sick.”

“I don’t get it,” he objects, “What am I so slow about?”

Nana eyes him with a loving exasperation unique to family, “To accept the path of love, you silly boy. How long did you spend staring at your eye wondering about how handsome you are or what kind of person you will be with your powers before you moved forward and embraced that nice boy.”

Steve’s mouth makes a small ‘oh’ as what Nana is saying seeps into his brain. “It wasn’t like it was years,” he tries, smiling winsomely at her.

“It could have been. If at all,” she scolds, unimpressed.

The realisation of what she is saying feels like a bucket of cold water has been thrown over him, sobering in the chilling understanding of what he has now avoided. Steve steps forward, gratefully holding onto her small hand, “Oh. In that case, thank you, Nana.”

The cloud over her expression clears and Nana smiles in satisfaction before squeezing his hand back, “There you are. That is the nice boy I raised. Good, you know what I did then.”

“Is the connection going to last?” He asks, determinedly not thinking about the way he and Eddie have been using it recently.

“That is up to the two of you. I tweaked your path myself, back at this point in time, but this is the extent of my meddling.” She lets go to place her spoon gently on the island full of cut and dried greenery. “You did well in taking action and now it is up to the two of you on how you will continue.”

He hasn't even had the full moment to worry before Nana is abruptly next to him as she raises a gentle hand to his cheek. She cradles his face like he is a newborn babe in her arms again, “Do not look so concerned, you have done well so far, have you not?” Her tone is as clear and efficient as ever and, as ever, he can hear the love beneath her brisk manner.

Steve nods, thinking at how he has been trying to be better at thinking and acting on what he wants in life. And Eddie’s getting better at speaking his mind. Eddie always has, he reflects, just not about Steve to Steve. Not until he thought he was allowed to.

“You’re right,” Steve leans into the warmth of her hand, cherishing this final comfort from her. “It could have taken years. Or maybe never.”

She hums in agreement. “I usually am. Now, tell your mother that I love her very much.”

“I will,” Steve promises, knowing that even his earth-bound, stoic mother will be moved by a message from her long departed mama. Even slyly looking forward to blowing her mind a little at their usual Sunday phone call.

“And I love you to the moon and back, my boy.” The skirt of her dress waves around her knees in a non-existant wind, the swaying movement echoed in an uncanny billowing of the day's light and the solarium's walls. The background behind her wavers as does her face and body, becoming fainter in every moment.

Nonetheless, he steadfastly reaches out to fold both her hands into his own clasp, “I know. I love you too, Nana.” Steve's heart is full of gratitude. To his Nana for her intervention. To the ethereal for allowing him to see her this one last time.

Her expression is as compassionate as her tone as she frankly says, “You never know what will happen, Stevie. Now go back and give your boy a kiss from me so he knows that he has my blessing.”

Steve folds her small, round body in his, taking a moment to take a deep breath and take in her powdery scent once more, to feel the weight of her full body in his arms. She rests her cheek on his chest and Steve feels a steady sense of family and purpose behind her touch.

He is loved and he is cared for; family, whether alive or not looks out for him so that he is not only safe but happy, cherished as a beloved son. He presses a kiss down at her faded, silver hair, imbuing the gesture with every sense of affection that he can. He can't see it, but he feels her answering smile.

His sense of touch and smell fades until his arms are empty and he is sitting down as he looks out onto his mundane living area, the film still paused, and the two most important people in his life staring trepidatiously back at him.

“It’s okay,” Steve smiles. “It was a gift.”

He leans over and presses a soft kiss to Eddie's cheek, “That’s from my Nana, she says you have her blessing.”

“Okay?” Eddie says uncertainly.

Steve looks over at Robin, his expression serene. “I was right, The Sacrifice was never supposed to create a mixing of the senses.” He grabs Eddie’s hand in his, squeezing. “Not our eyes or even sound.”

“It was Nana,” he continues, feeling a sense of contentment and a deep relief at the road not taken. “There was a good chance that we never would have talked about our feelings,” he adds to Eddie.

Steve reaches out to stroke a gentle thumb across Eddie's cheek, grateful that he chose a life where he can show the tender feelings he has for the beautiful, creative man across from him.

He smiles at Eddie's wavering expression, “You would have kept feeling confused and uncertain, unwilling to break the peace, and I would have continued to be a dumb asshole who thought my feelings were the natural platonic extension of a guy I’m clearly obsessed with.”

Eddie’s lips quirk up, “And Nana did what? Beaned you from the other side?”

Steve nods wryly, “Sort of. In a mystical type of way. She chose a moment in time to guide me and made sure it would activate at the moment that I took action to save you back in the Upside Down. I, uh,” he rubs at the back of his neck abashedly, “Maybe just didn’t ask the right questions when I looked at the patterns."

Embarrassed at having failed at such a basic lesson that his Nana had taught him years ago, Steve looks away from the both of them to concentrate on a speck on the wall as he explains himself, “I think I was too caught up in freaking out about being the guy who creeps on his friend that I didn’t think to just ask the ethereal.”

Robin’s head is in her hands and her shoulders are shaking. Steve doesn’t even bother to think she’s upset, not for one second. There she is, he thinks, rolling his eyes as she raises her head to reveal tears of laughter streaming down her face.

“You absolute idiot,” she crows. “You had the power to ask all along and you forgot? Because you were pining for Eddie so hard you couldn’t get your head out of your ass?” Her laughter peels brightly across the room.

Steve’s cheeks flush and he doesn’t want to see the judgement that must be on Eddie’s face too, but he risks peeking at him.

Eddie looks pensive as he gestures a finger between them, “We wouldn’t have…?”

“Maybe, maybe not.” Steve grimaces. “Nana said possibly years, but she hinted at never too.”

Eddie’s hand squeezes him tightly and he brings a hand up to draw Steve into a soft kiss, resting his forehead to Steve’s. “Thank Christ for Nana,” he breathes with conviction.

“Yeah,” Steve agrees, voice thick with the faith of a love sincerely found and followed. “She’s pretty smart. I, apparently, am a knucklehead.”

Eddie's eyes are bright with tenderness, “She must have loved you very much.”

“She does. She did? I’m not sure where she is right now, but she was good at Knowing, at looking into the tapestry of destiny as well. I know she would have wanted me to have the best version of my life. And that must be with you.”

Eddie lights up and Steve silently thanks Nana again, for helping to add another brick that shores up the wall convincing Eddie that he is worthy, that he is deserving of sincerity and compassion.

Eddie had told him, ever since that conversation in the kitchen when Steve had been so convinced about the terrible impact of Eddie’s death, that he had been working on believing in it. In allowing himself to have faith when people tell them that they love him.

Eddie demonstrates his resolution to keep trying too when he chews on his lip for a moment before saying, “Let’s make sure it’s a life well lived then. You try thinking a little deeper, yes; but I’ll speak up more and make sure that I say what needs to be said.”

Steve nods and presses a kiss to Eddie's forehead, not too alarmed but nevertheless warmed by his determination.

They’ve both been working on being more open in their communication since they had uncovered a pattern of misunderstandings following their confessions. Tangled threads that had been small at first but becoming stronger knots; enough to distract them from the happier life open to them, if they only chose it.

Like the radiant path that Steve had Seen available to Eddie in the grassy clearing, before they had gone on to battle Vecna. An option he could have Seen for himself if he had not been blinded to it, Steve suddenly comprehends.

The first prediction he'd had of a bright life where Eddie loved deeply and was loved passionately in return - it had been Steve’s path too. But he'd been unable to look past the devastating impact the darker path would have on Dustin and hadn't thought to look further. He hadn't Seen beyond the darkness to realise that Eddie's path was also Steve's.

Steve, never suspecting that his own fate could be so throrougly intertwined into a tapestry of devotion with a boy that he had just started to have a deeper bond with and tentative feelings for. Yet, through his powerful intervention and by the grace of his Nana's gift, Eddie is alive here and now, his arms wrapped around the man he will love forever.

He lets his head fall onto Eddie's shoulder, the warmth of his cologne and the heat of his body grounding Steve in the present. Chuckling into Steve's embrace, Eddie continues to watch Bogie chase after Sabrina.

Robin fondly rolls her eyes at them, even as she sends a quick wink Steve's way. He feels her support to the very marrow of his bones: Robin never lies to him and Steve will rely on that gift in the future when he inevitably, as any human does, messes up. Just as he will return the favour to her.

Eddie pressses a kiss to Steve's hair and in the gesture he feels a promise. They will both work hard, for themselves and the other. And, in doing so, they will continue to weave their own destiny, creating a life full of joy and love, an unwavering light that will shine brilliantly and fiercely in their hearts.

Together.

If you liked anything, please consider leaving a comment over on Ao3 :-) It would make my day!

Thank you so much for reading along with my story, it means a lot to me. And if you shuffled a comment my way then you need to know how much you moved me and made me feel seen. Thank you, all. I love you.

💜💙💚💛🧡❤️

Taglist

Thank you to my own little community of people who wanted to be tagged and often shared my little fic with their own friends. MVPs, all of you.

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merrysithmas · 2 months

Note

i really like reading your thoughts on "girl"! i was just wondering what you think might happen after paul passes? do you think people will start to examine the relationship between them as something more than just songwriting partners? i mean nothing really changed when yoko said john was bisexual (and some fans still don't believe it!). in my wildest dreams, paul's estate will drop a posthumous tell all book and we'll be left with so many questions lol.

John himself said he was queer several times - I remember watching an interview with him when he was saying being an artist in a capitalist world requires money and that if he wasn't famous he'd need to have married "a rich old lady or man" to be a songwriter.

He also said he hooked up with Brian in Spain (Yoko confirmed he told the press they did "do it" and she was seemingly applauding his bravery in saying so).

Lennon remarked that he was "afraid of the fag in him" which made him act on his anger and set off his worst most fearsome temper explosions.

Also I think there was a few "tell alls" where past friends reported that he was open about his queerness & confirmed hooking up with Brian in frustration.

May Pang wrote that he told her he considered (lol) an affair with Paul. He spent two years in gay clubs in LA.

Yoko also confirmed he was bi (as far she she knew, maybe later on had he not been murdered he'd have identified as gay or pan).

Elton John said he and Lennon did "naughty" things together and laughed about said things with Sean, his godson. Julian Lennon did an interview where he said he "agreed" that John and Paul were in love during the Get Back film period.

Lennon also contributed a first-person poem the First Gay Liberation book.

Those are just the examples I can think of off the top of my head. He also seems to have had a relationship of some kind with Stu (conjecture) and an obvious-departed-from-platonic dynamic with Paul which is easily, easily an emotionally romantic affair at least (which isn't the half of it).

Anyone who denies his queerness does a great disservice to his memory & the incredible poignancy of his songs in this context during his time period. Artists have been reworking the lyrics and wording of their queer songs to appeal to an unaccepting general audience for commerciality FOREVER and to assume this was not done by Lennon, who is "confirmed" queer (if you needed to hear it from Yoko for it to be true to you) is truly delusion.

I think after Paul has left us people will feel more comfortable analyzing their relationship in a queer sense and I do think at some point it has likely been engineered that something to that effect will be officially announced or endorsed in some regard by their Estates (to generate continued moneymaking lol and interest and enigma). I feel like that's something that could happen, reasonably, after Yoko is gone and her hold on the Lennon narrative is diluted into Sean's POV & the McCartney family has the freedom to speculate or give their personal feelings on the life of their beloved father in retrospect. There's also the chance Paul could say something or leave something to that effect before he leaves us.

I feel like Paul would never say anything otherwise because John never got to endorse any release of their personal history before his tragic and senseless murder in a time period where being gay was still treated with such bigotry and cruelty (the 80s). I feel like Paul's great respect for Jane Asher and their relationship is a testament to this because he has never spoken about their relationship out of respect for her - for the exact reason that she has never spoke publically about it herself.

Paul is a pragmatic and private person and I feel like he knows the majority of the ignorant world isn't ready to hear the biggest band in human history was founded on teenaged homoromantic affection/gay love. But maybe one day, it will be.

This is speculation on my part but Paul also probably doesn't want Yoko to know anything because either she is willfully ignorant or John truly wasn't honest with her and Paul feels it's something she doesn't deserve to know - especially if it's something John kept private & only between he and Paul. It's something he always has that's over and beyond what Yoko and John had & he seems to treasure those specific things no matter what they are. Obviously... Paul still doesn't care for Yoko and he is probably extremely fatigued of the fact that she has been the managing agent & author of John's estate for 40 years (when in the late 70s she and John seemed on unsteady terms as per other parties) and then treated Julian with such disregard. Sean on the other hand seems to have grown to love Paul, but we'll see lol.

I also feel like Paul probably has a few "surprises" for Beatles fans lined up for after he and Ringo are gone - he just seems like that kind of person and wants the Beatles to continue on in great esteem for many many years to come.

thank you for your ask!!

#john lennon #ask #anon #mclennon #may the straights perish and all their false gods fall amen #guess im officially a mclennon-er now with this ask #but also i have been forever #and its my duty to give light to the dead gays of the world #as both a medium and a living gay lol #i salute u all 🫡🫡

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