#and no one really has any goals

[artgletic]

case study of the self-identified god

#obsessed with the fact that rain world is a game about survival #yet every character we meet has the express goal of trying to optimize killing themselves #every creature in game seems perfectly content fulfilling their role in the ecosystem no matter how many cycles they do the same thing #(rly obvious with gourmand's entire route. guy who lives their life to the fullest without the slightest hint of resentment) #it was really only the ancients who thought they were above it and thought of it as something to escape from #5pebbles is so interesting because the only reason hes “”“godlike”“” is because of his vast knowledge. if he was in any slugcats shoes he #would die instantly which is ironically what hes been trying to do this whole time #this comic was kind of exploring the idea of awareness (divinity) as something that drags down ones enjoyment of life (walking). #if 5p would humble himself down enough to walk around like any other creature #he would a) be much happier in life and b) achieve the ascension he's been gunning for for millennia like all the slugcats did #but he never will. #getting rid of all his work on the problem or even his awareness of it entirely #would just be a trick of convenience that steals away his godhood #and him calling himself godlike is kind of a cope LOL #a cope being faced with a problem he was never meant to solve #a cope being faced with what he did to moon #a cope being faced with the rot inside him #oh well. #anyway fuck 5 pebbles i hate that guy #rain world #rain world fanart #rw five pebbles #rain world five pebbles #rw gourmand #rain world gourmand #five pebbles #rain world void worm #rain world ancients #also JUST KIDDING ilu 5p. you suck but i💛u

[fear-no-mort]

favourite thing: his new habit of saying uhuh/mhm and also this

#the first time he did it in unmortricken i was like Fuck Yes and little did i know he would just keep doing it the whole time #DESPERATELY hoping they keep both of these things. i Love when characters have tiny little habits sprinkled in their actions #to me these things kinda sorta symbolise him no longer being afraid to really be himself #like he no longer has to hide certain things about himself that inside of the cfc wouldve made him appear ‘suspicious’ #since he IS like so much different than any other morty ever #also barely related but like. em is fundamentally such a good character bc everytime we see him he’s feeling something different #in his first appearance he was cold and distant because at the time he was new to being free and was strictly focused on his goal and wasn’ #even sure if it would work #in his second appearance he seemed hopeful and honest both of these things just being a trap to get the people of the citadel to trust him #and his old colder self unfurling near the end after he successfully becomes president #in his third appearance he seems giddy almost. he’s constantly giggling before and after sentences and he’s super eager to just Get The Hel #Out. and also to reveal the truth to morty prime. make it so that he doesn’t have to be the one to shoulder everything anymore. #and this fourth appearance. apart from a few little details he really just seems happy and comfortable. the entire episode he was just doin #whatever he wanted and nobody got in his way at all. and i could not be happier #normal about this character! #rick and morty #evil morty #rick and morty spoilers #odiespeak

[foreverppl]

Moodboard for Jinnah Beatty (they/she), lead singer of ethereal goth band Mayday Malady.

@infamous-if

Playlist

#romancing august I think but we’ll see what oriana is saying when the updated demo comes out hehe #some quick facts: #they usually go by their last name #her goal with her style is to be constantly mistaken for a beautiful ghost #lots of long skirts/dresses + layers. gossamer looking fabric etc. only ever wears black or white #on stage she’s also usually wearing a mourning veil bc of course she is #half of her love of music comes from the spectacle of it. like being able to construct a persona and exist in it for a little while #like playing make believe #they make a lot of their own clothes. if they weren’t doing music they’d definitely be doing something in fashion. #she deeply deeply hates being misunderstood or having her words/actions be twisted so she’s like pulling her hair out rn lmao #the band’s songs are pretty high usually so she always secretly finds it funny when fans try to sing along and are off key or something lol #the only tattoo they have is seven’s initials and she doesn’t really plan on getting any others #they’re hesitant abt being a positioned as the leader bc sometimes she has issues with reeling in her emotions #and responding reasonably in the moment. #anyway she can’t relate to the loser mc allegations she’s the coolest mf on the scene tbh #but I am sorta… scared for them. #on account of the horrors that are yet to come #bc truthfully they don’t know any coping mechanisms that aren’t just ‘ignore it until it goes away’ lmao #one of the things she is currently ignoring to the best of their ability is seven #if: infamous #mb #mc: jinnah beatty (infamous)

[saltpepperbeard]

NEXT GOAL WINS - 2023 | dir. Taika Waititi

#Next Goal Wins #Taika Waititi #Rhys Darby #Michael Fassbender #Will Arnett #Edit #SUCTION CUPS MYSELF TO ANY SORT OF TRAILER FROM ANY OF OUR LOVELIES LMAO #AND THIS ONE CHECKS MANY A BOX #Always excited to see more of Taika's directing work #And even MORE excited to see him working with our lovely bunch still #And EVEN MORE excited to see more Polynesian stories coming from Taika #Speaking of which that Siva Tau has me feeling some kind of way #I absolutely ADORE to see it #And Taika just vibing as a priest hsdkjlsds PLEASE #Really hoping they all get accolades for this one

[brittlebutch]

actually it's kind of funny how people will say Alex's fatal flaw is that he 'doesn't ask for help' and that it's his determination to handle things on his own that leads to his deterioration and eventual death when his whole introduction to the present-day timeline was a very literal cry for help that simply went ignored

#N posts stuff #like even if you think alex was lying throughout the entirety of season 2 and he was waiting from the Moment jay showed up #JUST to kill him (Which again i don't think makes much sense when he could have killed Tim & Jay immediately instead of #breaking Tim's leg. anyway) EVEN IF alex spent that whole time lying it doesn't actually change the fact that he would have at least #been Pretending to Ask For Help and if he wasn't lying then he was Literally Asking For Help and it doesn't Actually matter #what intention Alex had because the text is Ambiguous about Alex's honesty during season two; what isn't ambiguous is the way #other characters (specifically Jay) respond to him; like yeah - S2 Brian/Tim were never in one million years going to help Alex with shit #so sort of any argument that brings up Tim as someone who asks for/offers help is borderline meaningless in this era of the series #Jay had the 'opportunity' to help Alex (and i'll get back to that in a sec) but DIDN'T - Jay wasn't Interested in actually offering Alex #'help' bc Jay is ultimately curious about Answers and 'Offering Help' and 'Getting Answers' are two Wildly conflicting goals #Jay thinks Alex has answers and when Alex doesn't Offer these 'Answers' to Jay on a silver platter Jay gets pissed off and paranoid #and starts Stalking Alex bc he thinks it's 'Suspicious' that Alex won't give him the Answers (that Alex probably doesn't Actually have) #ANYWAY. ultimately this post is about how it's absurd when people argue #that individual character choices could have made a difference in the way this series played out - specifically wrt Alex #because EVERYONE in this WHOLE series are being affected by influences outside of their control ; including Brian Tim and Jay #so it's silly when people are like 'if ALEX had just made a different choice For Himself this could have all been avoided' WRONG. #bc Ultimately there's not really a way to 'help' someone else out of this situation - Tim tried and failed Repeatedly #the comics proved he even failed with Jessica - like MH isn't a horror situation where you can kill the big bad #'getting help' is a meaningless argument - what would successfully helping or getting help even look like? anyway. #the sub argument of this post is that Alex's biggest 'sin' is that he doesn't perform emotions the way other people want him to #like Alex is a character with a kind of flat affect - instead of LOOKING scared or grieved he LOOKS bored or angry #and everyone judges him based on that - so Alex is 'Suspicious' he's 'Lying' he's 'Guilty' but all of these deductions are predicated #on the belief that Alex isn't reacting to his circumstances the way a 'Normal' person would - so it MUST all be an act and so he's guilty #so everyone treats him like he's guilty until the end of season two when he's like 'Fuck it FINE i'll be guilty then' and so it goes #not a self-fulfilled prophecy but being Cornered Into a prophecy and then Blamed for it - SAD. anyway

[roseworth]

comic convos with Comic Dudes are crazy bc we are reading these stupid picture books so differently. when we have a “who’s your favorite robin” convo and i say jason or steph and they say “tim because he’s the best one” i know we are looking for completely different things in these books

#also today someone who has said before that they ‘only read deathstroke comics because he’s more interesting than the other dc characters’ #asked me ‘which robin has been on the titans’ #i had to stop for a second because?? um. all of them #except steph and duke #i also tried to talk to that person about rose one time (they said they like deathstroke comics and i will take any opportunity i get) #but i said ‘do you know rose wilson’ and they said ‘yeah she and slade are toxic couple goals’ #and i thought ok. either you’re mixing her up with adeline or you have really strange opinions about this guy and his daughter #either way i ended the conversation

[emmaspolaroid]

I have the capacity to be normal about it. But I won’t.

#it was clear from the beginning this girl is INSANE #but this proves that she really will use any means necessary to accomplish her goal #as long as she’s the only one who has to suffer for it she doesn’t gaf #when you’re desperate not to turn into your mother and end up just like her anyway #punching furniture and eating asphalt about it #the promised neverland #emma tpn #Nikki talks about TPN

[soldier-poet-king]

I love my Nonna dearly but I also just got my first real "here's how you should find a man" advice so truly 2023 IS my Charlotte Lucas year

To be fair, I'll give them credit, this is one of the first times my family has pulled this shit on me. I suppose my "I'm too busy focusing on school" excuse that I used through all 8 years of undergrad and grad school doesn't really work now that I've been working full-time for a year. And she also didn't bring it up in front of everyone or out of the blue, it came up because we had been discussing how insane my motherhas been about babies lately and my Nonna said "oh it's BC she's waiting for grandkids"

And like??? Just because my mother got married and had kids by my age (which may have been the right decision for her, this isn't judging even if I think her life went to shit bc of it) doesn't mean it's the right decision for ME

In fact, it is the ABSOLUTE WRONG decision for me. Theres a whole long list of reasons why I'm not getting married + or having children, including but not limited to: the trauma of my parents marriage and my childhood, my own ongoing health stuff, the whole religious queer anxiety guilt complex I've got going, the fact that if I were to get pregnant the resulting mental health crisis and dysphoria would undoubtedly make me *** y'know not soemthing that is frequently a source of nightmares for me or anything, my inability to take care of myself let alone CHILDREN, and the anxiety of raising children religious when I don't even know wtf is going on with me, CHILDREN??? IN THIS ECONOMY????

Ofc I can't exactly say any of this to my Nonna who, while incredibly sweet and loving and Good, is also like. Not at all exposed to these concepts and would probably freak out if I was like hello yes I am a big fat queer and I rlly hate the concept of gender and societal ideas of womanhood :) it also doesn't help that rlly the only single, middle aged woman my Nonna knows is this lady who works at the church who is DEFINITELY a badly closeted lesbian but also she's super fuckin mean and condescending and no one likes her BC she's a bitch, on top of the whole being a badly closeted lesbian in a conservative heteronormative religious environment

Like even IF I were to get licitly Catholic married to a man. You wanna find one for me??? My Nonna was like "go to church more to find a man" HELLO??? WHERE??I GO TO MASS EVERY WEEK?? Every religious man I know irl is a radtrad women can't wear pants type or is a manchild. Even if I COULD find a normal man, he'd have to get real cool about some stuff real quick. In that forever dilemma of too leftist queer for the religious and too religious for the leftist queers. (Obvs your partner doesn't have to be your duplicate but I'm like. Generally being on the same page. The same BALLPARK. is probably conducive to having a healthy relationship, y'know?)

Besides a significant part of my having 0 social life is because I am living in my parents basement which is in a shitty not-a-suburb of mostly immigrant families with youngish kids or super old folks from when the neighborhood was built, so it's poor and run down but also super fuckin far from anything To Do, so it's the WORST of both worlds of urban sprawl. And I have no car. And I already spend 2.5 hrs a day commuting for work. And I'm chronically tired. And joining a fencing club or taking art class or whatever costs MONEY y'know the thing I'm trying to SAVE by living in this hell place???? She literally said in the same convo "live here as long as possible to save money" like??? YOU CANT HAVE UR CAKE AND EAT IT TOO as long as I'm living here I'm NOT going out and meeting ppl BC there is literally Nowhere To Go. Big box stores like Walmart? Yet another strip mall? The highway??? THIS IS SOULLESS HELL of neither nature NOR accessible city amenities

And anyway, I would rather be in a long term marriage for tax benefits relationship anyway. Not platonic, not romantic, but a secret third thing (jk but also serious). Like. Mutual devotion that blurs the lines and transcends labels. It could be completely chaste. It could not be. It's not a dealbreaker really. It's about trust and devotion and companionship and love. But also I'm insane and I KNOW how insane and obsessive I sound, and society prioritizes nuclear family relationships and not the weird ass shit I crave, and I feel too much too fast and would ruin any relationship I had even if I WERE to somehow find someone who prioritizes those things too

So like. It's fine. Most days (not all ofc, but I'm trying) I'm okay with this and being on my own and learning to cultivate my own peace and Goodness and I know who I am and what I believe and what I trust to be Good and I'm working toward that and I'm not sacrificing it for anything. But also. Can you give a bitch a break. Please. I'm so fkin tired

#franposting #my bday isnt even til JUNE #im going to bitch anyway #im genuinely really upset but part of that is bc my headache has come back #and its worse than ever #i might cry but my head already hurts too much #i got really good news at work and only the men in my family made a big deal #the women were just. meh. and ofc none of them have careers so why should ot be important to me? #as the only granddaughter ofc :)))) #i am going. to crawl into bed. hair washed. lavender candle on. #do a lil meal planning. and then read or maybe just sleep. #tmrws goals after church are gym and grocery shopping before dnd #have to make my body hurt so much i cant think again #ofc bro 1 has claimed the car. so maybe i cant go #god. gos. i fuckin need to get out of here #but i literally cannot afford even studio apt rent in the city #and moving to one of the boroughs doesnt gwt me any closer to anything esp without a car #literally. just like. fuckin kill me #or find me a decently paid not soul killing job in a smaller city or even a town #where i could have a garden #or a porch swing. sit in. the sunlight

[thethingything]

oh yeah also, Bread Quest bread 10: cheese topped rolls

I almost forgot to count these ones and I'm pretty sure there are other types of bread we've had that I've forgotten to count too. we just had these buttered with truffle salt earlier and it was a really nice breakfast

#personal #thoughts #🍬 post #food #bread quest #new year's resolutions 2024 #posts made on pain meds #I keep forgetting we're counting any bread besides just white loafs so then I have a bread we've had before and almost forget to count it #it's turned into a fun way of seeing how much variety there is in at least one type of food we eat though #and it means we're getting excited about both trying new types of bread when we get the chance #and about eating types we've had plenty of times before but just haven't had so far this year #I'm realising a bunch of the goals we have for this year are all just about trying new things and learning new things #like trying as many types of bread as we can and both seeing and learning about as many different species as we can #and even the Big Drawing is one where we're drawing a bunch of stuff we're not really used to and having to learn how to do it #and playing around with an art style we're not as used to #and like even though this year has been pretty shit so far I'm pretty sure regularly engaging with stuff that feels new is helping

[crypt1dcorv1dae]

Apollo with thick eyebrows and freckles and body hair is my truth. He's a small tank also. Wide. He works out bc 1: he does not want to ever be called a twink and 2: it helps with stress and God knows he is STRESSED. Oh also he's trans. Also when his hair is un-gelled it looks almost exactly like trucy's, his lil bunny ears curl around his face all cute and he hates it which is why he gels it back so aggressively

#apollo justice #hes my ideal transition goals ngl #like the image of him in my head is like yes. yes this is what i want to be someday. #he has inspired me to finally talk to my dr about being trans and wanting to seek transition #im goig to be really really clear abouty dysphoria being one of the biggest sources of anxiety and depression for me #and it making me feel so bad i dont even want to leave the house sometimes bc i dont pass well usually #bc you never want to undersell your dysphoria to a doctor or therapist. if anything you should oversell it to ensure you can get care #like you dont have to say you want to die or anything bc thats always risky to tell any medical professional but like. #but always tell them it makes you hate yourself even if its not true #if you need to lie about what exactly your gender identity is to get the type of care you need too then fucking do it #doctors will not give a nonbinary person HRT 90% of the time sometimes u need to fib a little about your gender to get what u need!!!!

[everysongineverykey]

some guy commented on my narrator + toriel fic saying "well the narrator's done some questionable stuff once or twice but he's not the one who let SIX children DIE just to SPITE her ex-husband" lmaoooo bro did you even play undertale? you can just say you have no reading comprehension it's okay

#like. of all the toriel slander i've seen this is by far the most ridiculous bc like #even on the most basic of levels it is so clearly wrong. toriel did not let the children go WITH THE INTENTION OF THEM DYING lmao #like her entire thing is not wanting kids to die and being overprotective because of it. that is a basic tenet of her character #and most toriel slander i've seen at least. knows this basic fact #they say shit like 'she's controlling and domineering' or 'she should've gone with them' #but this guy? no. they seem to believe that she. wanted them to die. to 'spite asgore'? how exactly would this spite him? #if i recall correctly (sarcasm. of course i recall correctly) #asgore was the one who WANTED the fallen humans to die. #or he didn't really want them to die deep down inside #but still he saw to it that they did. they would not be dead if it were not for him #and the anti-human laws he put in place #and his attempt to raise the kingdom's spirits by declaring war on humans. #i try to be as neutral as possible on any given character but you can't deny that that's an objective fact. #if toriel let them die she would be helping asgore's purposes. #her entire goal by living in the ruins is to take in fallen humans and protect them #so asgore DOESN'T kill them. so she can thwart his plans THAT way. #also i love the wording of 'the narrator's done some questionable stuff' #he exploded stanley. he erased all of stanley's friends and coworkers. he has made stanley's existence a living hell for god knows how long #i mean yeah yeah it's not really him who's in control they're both slaves to the narrative and all that #but he holds a lot of power over stanley and he uses it. and abuses it. #to act like wilful sadistic murder is on the same level as a distraught bereaved mother #trying to save other children from the fate her own suffered and becoming overprotective in the process #is just ridiculous. lol #anyways i deleted the comment :] no toriel slander under toriel-sympathetic fics pleeeaaase

[shopcat]

people will see two characters who are good friends ... best friends even ...live in each others pockets ... are incredibly important to each other and a really lovely and sweet and very simple example of friendship being important and fulfilling and meaningful and beautiful and not "just" friendship because there is no such thing... and then they will turn around and they haven't even finished the previous sentence before being like Oh but if this one wasn't a lesbian she would be in love with her male best friend and vice versa. obviously. or he has feelings for her but he "let them go" because she's a lesbian if she wasn't though they would date. in fact if this was a magical world where he was a girl all along they would be in love because all that stuff i said about friendship and importance was actually just words ?!

and like beyond the sheer lesbophobia and sheer CRUELTY for him to even consider either of them in that light on a regular basis i would honestly prefer people own the fuck up to what they're apparently trying to say here and fully commit to going "No, i DON'T actually think friendship that stays platonic and that factor of it will NEVER change can be equally important or MORE SO as other kinds of relationships and in fact i don't think the very idea exists i was just saying all that stuff about platonic nonromantic soulmates to just say it". right before the apparent mission statement of so many that is "if a lesbian is friends with a man i think her sexuality is getting in the way in one way or another". i wish you people just literally got your phones taken away and a parental lock put in place.

#i wish when you blocked people it hurt them. #he. and obv you know who i'm talking about. DOES NOT HAVE FEELINGS FOR HER #and she. DOES NOT HAVE AND NEVER HAS AND NEVER WOULD AND NEVER COULD HAVE FEELINGS FOR HIM #you're NOT going oh in another life we would've got married if i wasn't gay you're not DOING that #you're being WEIRD. STOP IT. ITS SO FUCKING EASY 😭😭😭 #if you seriously can't conceptualise any of those dumb hypotheticals where he's like a girl the whole time or shes Not a lesbian #where the end goal isn't ''oh so they can date now :)'' it's.... so they're still friends.... THEN YOURE INSANE ‼️‼️‼️ #AND POSSIBLY FUCKING EVIL‼️‼️‼️ #so they ''CAN'' date now sends shivers up my spine #this is what i mean when i say i hate that codependent shit now. no one can be normal about it and now i hate it all #i'm going to make anti codependent hcs to put negativity out there to balance it out. i don't think steve knows her last name #also anyone who thinks steve as of s4 has any sort of feelings for robin that is literally so gross 😭 why would you even like him if you #thought that. case in point and i'm NOT even exaggerating here that is what people who Hate steve say #as proof for hating him. cuz they think he has feelings for her. which is something you would hate him for #also literally do not doubt me for if some reason in s5 he says and acrually means ''i have feelings for robin still'' i would .. stop #liking him... it would be easy..... #sts #anyway. this isn't about trans content either that's a whole other . Thing. which i don't really care about right now

[eddis-not-eeddis]

.

#things in my life are actually getting better #but i don't really know how to cope with that because it's been about seven years since anything really good has come my way and i #i am freaking out #i might be having a mid-life crisis a little early #i'm a year behind but some of the BIG plots I've been scheming and dreaming of are finally about to come to fruition #and i cannot be even remotely normal about it #i feel like i'm paralyzed #i am so so scared of everything right now #i just want to hide myself in a dark corner and never have to see a single person ever again #it's not the first step on the path #but it's the first one where the end goal is FINALLY in sight and i have worked SO HARD for this for five years #(but really seven because for two years just hanging in there and not dying was harder than any of the work) #now that my goal is within my grasp #real and tangible #i don't really know what to do with myself #it's terrifying #and exciting #i feel like i can do anything but also like i'm going to crash and burn #ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

[kerorowhump]

the duality of kururu is that he could've actually forgotten to tell keroro to mind the height of the door on the aircraft in ep26... but maybe he didn't say it on purpose because he likes to have fun at others' misfortune... but MAYBE it was also that he was trying to stop keroro 🤭 like when he made angol mois fall in his solitary jail ... pulling the strings so that ultimately the GOOD outcome can still happen... pushing fuyuki in the water with a lifesaver? he almost drowned later, he could use the skill of Knowing How To Swim... or... anything in the cavity episode still resulting in the cavities being taken care of... (even if he enjoyed blowing him up from the inside 🫢)... to me he's like a true chaotic neutral, he enjoys teasing others and if that helps achieve a positive goal too that's nice

#kururu #musing #LIKE THE MANGA PAGES I RBED #LIKE IS HE GIVING SHINRORO THE CRAYON? YES IN THE END. BUT HE STILL MESSED WITH HIM #i dont know any other context there tho so i didnt put it in the post #i love kururu hes fascinating *writes a wall of text of analysis* #he clearly enjoys the company of the platoon esp keroro (he has like a special understanding with him) but hes ok with being by himself too #in ep26 he was the only one to not have a goal in relation to the main plot. he really won the idgaf war #like keroro was involved selfishly and tamama dororo were involved selflessly n giroro a bit of both but kururu was like idc im just gonna- #fly the dang ship. literally wait for u guys up here. oh he rocks #headcanon

[herequeerexitentialfear]

[Belated] Wip Wednesday!

you know my life is hectic when notes ap fics while im waiting for the bus make a comeback. anyway Tesoro is being a weirdly sweet manipulative cunt<3 i need to write one of the many times Celia fucks up everyone lives shes looking to pity-able. this is notes app writing so no editing or rereading [except for the beginning with whos speaking] just stream of thoughts- i already know many places i will sit down and improve when i have time

[Tesoro] Do you know who Amelia reminds me of?

[Celia laughs] It's obvious, isn't it?

[Tesoro, dead serious] She reminds me of you.

[Celia, at the same time] Of Elen-

Seeing Celia freeze in shock, a cruel part of him was glad, to be assured that with just a few words he could still metaphorically lay Celia bare, strip away all of the stone walls and bravado, and leave behind a scared child, even after all these years.

Golden eyes were wide, the white fully surrounding. Bright pupils were growing larger, threatening to drown out the narrowing ring of gold.

Its a secret so few know that those pinpricks growing to even half the size of a normal pupil is an indicator of true fear, whereas the usual pinpricks is normal. To those who knew her younger, they think it just changed over time to be smaller, but the truth is she's in many ways conquered her old fears, and those that have taken their place are a slow constant fear, about larger factors. Celia doesn't worry that she will get physically attacked from any side. these days, its the era of mind games instead.

It was always interesting, Celias eyes. More normal than black in place of white, but those metallic eyes and bright pinprick pupils were unsettling to him even more. At first glance, human, second, anything but. Celia- of heaven, according to some old Latin books, derived from a surname meaning the same.

It was easy to see her as something other, even holy, but no benevolent god could create a soldier like her. Those who called her brother an angel were just as misguided, but the veneer of kindness and comfort that made it easy to ignore Cecios' terrifying power over people and see him as holy was lacking in his sister, who they viewed with fear, no seemingly benevolent and gracious angel but an awesome- in the most classical sense of the word- leader of man, set apart from the rest with an unsettling aura of difference. A far cry from the little girl Amelia so reminds him of. Elena was the seemingly godlike one, inspiring awe and fear, then. Celia was just another scrapper desperate to prove her worth in the eyes of her peer, and oh, how desperate she was.

It's the most likely reason why, why he can disable her like this, bypass years of walls. Because he was there before those walls became impenetrable, before she stepped up and shut everyone else out. Some lingering memories of him as her superior, in their childish hierarchy, instincts to listen to him, still dormant inside her.

For every time she learned to put up a higher and stronger wall, he had learned how to bring it crashing down.

It's the same cruel part of him that whispers it, but she truly is his greatest success, rising from the bottom to new heights - all with him by her side advising her.

#with just a few words he could still metaphorically lay Celia bare- strip away all of the stone walls and bravado #- and leave behind a scared child- even after all these years. #thebirdwrites #gold & silver #celia #tesoro #god hes so fucked up i love him #again this is unedited and has glaring issues but im tired #in a fucked up way he would dislike Elena coming back because A. it would disrupt everything #and B. he will no longer be the person that can cut and affect Celia the most #He loves them both! his best friend and leader and his new friend and new leader! #hell hes the one that stays in contact with her! #but hes also a control freak<3 #something something the power trip in being able to strip someone back to a scared child #actually i fucking wrote it #again. hes so fcuekd up but i love him<3 #if any of this seems similar its because Cecio looked at him and said that who i want to be as a man #an extremely attractive and nice seeming serial emotional manipulator #alongside his other transition goals: Griffith from berserk #wait let me check the timelines #cecio was 11 when the first chapter of the golden age arc released! #dont think about when english translations happened #but he could theoretically see Griffiths design and decide silver haired pretty boy is what he wants to be #god i really do go on tangents in teh tags

[comet-wire]

Ngl I've been having a gender crisis again on top of all the stuff that's happened with my dad, I think I still identify as male/masculine idk 🗿

Same with my ace/aro spectrum placement ☝️🗿

#comet rambles #putting in queue to deploy later #parent loss tw #just in case by association n implications ☝️🗿/nm+gen #when i get stuff set up with my checking account i was already thinking of getting a new chest binder once our personal issues with finance #has been figured out definitely #i dont wanna say much n jinx stuff so ill leave it at that #personal #gender shit is hard n i really think i may be a he/they or he/him still #or if not then closeted butch lesbian idk #most signs point to male gender identity leaning though 😔👍 #also my social battery is outta wack but i needed to get this out so i apologize to anyone who i have yet to respond to/gen+nm 🥹 #like i genuinely still feel as though ive been born in the wrong body and i tried to accept my feminity and it went well!! #like i started embracing my femininity the past few years and now i think im over it because it feels like i just attempted to try #and be something i wasn't if that makes any sense #i hate being referred to as she/her or as a girl even if i understand some people will still see me as fem despite my personal identity etc #its not that i hate my femininity its just i feel anything but female while still enjoying traditionally fem stuff at times #hope this makes sense #🗿👍 #still ace/aro though just cant figure out if i only enjoy the thought of romance (cupiosexual/romantic) or if i feel comfy in one #i know im sex repulsed though thats for certain #as of lately chris Redfield and Albert Wesker have become two of my transition goals and idk what to do about this lmfao #i wish i was kidding #but im not 😭 #sitting here like EVA shinji with his head in his hands in the damn chair image/lh #also wanna be a rootin tootin goth cowboy 🥰 #if it turns out im like a comphet butch/nb lesbian im gonna shit myself though/lh+nm