#and i also hate that I have to be like 'i'm not overreacting' to myself a thousand times when having these feelings | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

bozepomagaj · 5 months

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ATINY/MOA/CARATS vs Made in Abyss was the last thing I expected and its hilarious

feel like I need to say something since twitter absolutely loves spreading misinfo and just accusing people of shit, how have you people not LEARNED your lesson yet? Since when is twitter such a trusted source, especially gossip accounts?

And before you braindead stans start calling me a d!ckrider, I promise you I do not care about these men cuz I've got better things to focus on and I'm making this because people are overreacting and it's getting annoying. It's so obvious 90% of you haven't watched the anime (and thats completely fine, I get you) and then ended up listening to someone who made stuff up and overexaggerated. I'm not here to defend the author because I hate him as much as you do and can absolutely recognize the dude is into some weird shit but saying people are ONLY interested in this series because of r@pe and p€dophilia is INSANE. So let me answer some questions as a Made an Abyss reader (not calling myself a fan because you'll catch me DEAD before you see me buying any merch or manga despite my love for the series), kpop fan second.

Does Made In Abyss contain p3d0ph1l1c themes, gore etc.?

There absolutely is because the author is a creep (refering to the nsfw however, most of the times it's very easily skippable. As someone who hates l0l1con cuz it creeps me out, I can tell you that I really didn't have a hard time skipping said scenes even in the manga which is far more explicit than the anime (Prushka asking about Bond's 'stick', Faputa looking into Regs pants, Vueko's weird comments) and sometimes, they're even added as extras (0.5 chapters) which certain sites that contain scans don't even include. I didn't even know about the existence about a few of these chapters BECAUSE they don't include them.

The OVA is a nightmare to watch and was not only unfunny but creepy as fuck especially when they try to boil down such an amazing character like Ozen into 'I like seeing little kids in pain'. Now I have no idea if this was made independently but I don't remember the author making any spin-offs that they could base this on so I can't tell you who wrote it but even then I doubt that the author minded it since the man himself had to include that Faputas behind smells like the 'Sun' so again, not here to defend him cuz he most definitely is a weirdo, no doubt about it.

Is Made in Abyss torture p*rn?

If MiA is torture p*rn then AoT is military propaganda and supports child labor, TPN is also torture p*rn, JJK promotes violence, Berserk excuses r*pe and Evangelion is also p*do bait. See how stupid that sounds? Just because an anime INCLUDES something, does not mean it necessarily supports it. Yes, r*pe is mentioned but it's not even SHOWN, and it's a cruical part of a characters backstory. The torture that happens, happens only once if we exclude Riko's 'experiment' at the very beginning of the manga. And Mitty's transformation can't even be classified as torture cuz it's a.... transformation. Prushka's death is very censored so its not like you can jack off to that anyways. Now the piss thing is something I have noticed but haven't really payed attention it because bffr why the hell would I so idk, maybe the author is trying to tell us something or the guy thinks pee pee poo poo funny🤷‍♀️.

Is there any plot besides the weird stuff?

See now this is the part that gets me most because the reason why a majority of people nowadays got into MiA in the first place is BECAUSE of the amazing plot. The world building, the mystery, the fight scenes, etc. It's amazingly drawn, nicely paced and unique in its own way. But of course, it's manga&anime and what's anime without fanservice? I already explained that in manga, said scenes can be easily skipped and the anime thankfully doesn't include a lot of these. I do have to admit thag I dropped the manga for now since the chapter where they were in a bath cuz it was another one of those 'here we go again' moments where it made me roll my eyes and just close the tab so I don't really know what's been happening recently and if things go weirder.

I'm also gonna tell you honestly that yes, the fandom is filled with sweaty dudebros itching to see these kids half naked and the author is aware of them and pondering to them because he too is one of them. But a large majority is back from when the anime originally came out and are mostly hiding on twitter so it's easy to avoid them and they've been pretty rare ever since people with actual interest in the series have begun watching it. A reason why back in the day I didn't wanna interact with the fandom at ALL was because the moment I tried to have a normal conversation about the plot and what might actually be going on, I instead get bombarded with "UWAAAA😭😭😭" and 'c*nny' comments. I also cannot defend and don't even plan on defending the fact that Faputa is pretty much naked the entire series. I get that she lives in the literal wilderness, but the very least you could do is put a cloth on her y'know. And mind you, I'm talking about the manga. The anime is a LOT more heavily censored, and from what I heard, even MORE censored in Korea.

To sum it up:

Do I think Mingi/Soobin/Woozi are p*dos cuz they watched the anime? Absolutely the fuck not. Considering Mingi is a big CSM fan, I can see why he watched Made in Abyss because I was in that same pipeline. I think some of you are going way too far with these comments, if you wanna call them weird, creepy, wanna unstan them for reading stuff like this go ahead, not gonna stop because in the end no one can but accusing people of crimes isn't funny and never will be. If they were exposed for watching shit like Kodomo no Jikan then that most definitely IS eyebrow raising. Maybe I'm slightly biased due to me only enjoying MiA for the plot so seeing people say the fans are p3d0s when the first time I watched this was when I was freshly 15.... yeah idk abt that one. Whether they liked the weird and questionable scenes, I have zero idea I'm just here to say that you can enjoy said anime without being a weirdo and you shouldn't begin jumping to conclusions and start calling people straight up criminals. If anyone wants to have a productive conversation and ask questions abt said anime cuz I doubt you're gonna go watch an anime over a Twitter drama, go ahead and ask. If you wanna insult me and call me a d!ckrider then go ahead and do that too, who am I to stop you?

#mingi #soobin #woozi #seventeen #ateez #txt #tomorrow x together #made in abyss

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am-i-the-asshole-official · 5 months

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AITA for yelling at my mom because of incense?💭

( emoji so I can recognise my submission and this is a hella long post so be warned)

So I (16F) really hate smoke. And I mean beyond the regular hate, I mean like the moment I smell smoke I instantly become very, very angry. I'm not sure why exactly, I suspect it might be because I'm on the autism spectrum but I haven't been officially diagnosed so take this with a grain of salt. Also just to clarify, I have no lung issues which would cause me to be extra effected by smoke, it's almost entirely psychological.

My mom (50F) got into this whole spiritual circle stuff about a year ago and does meditation thingies. Involves a lot of rituals, crystals and incense. Not entirely sure the exact reason why but the important thing is this means she is lighting incense almost everyday. As a result, on most days the house smells like smoke. I have told her quite a few times to ventilate properly if she's going to use it but I feel like every time I enter the main room of the house it smells like smoke. However I can manage this by simply shutting my door to avoid getting a lungful of smoke. No, the thing that pisses me off are her "cleansing sessions." This is where she goes through the house waving an incense stick everywhere to "purify the bad spirits." This means I have absolutely nowhere in the house to escape from the smoke and often get forced outside to escape. I have tolerated these "cleansing sessions" a few times but on the most recent one, it happened to be raining extremely heavily. This meant that I was stuck. In a house FILLED with the smell of smoke.

I tried to keep myself calm for a while by ventilating the smoke from under a blanket but even then I could still smell it and it made me raging mad. So I then proceeded to stomp up to my mom and yelled at her. I said some very nasty things which I'm not proud of saying. They were very personal insults mostly pertaining to how her beliefs were bullshit and about her insecurities. We had a shouting match over it which ended in her telling me to go back to my room.

Why I think I could be the asshole here is because:

A. I could have more clearly stated beforehand that I wanted her to stop cleansing my room or at the very least she needs to turn the aircon on when she burns incense.

B. She didn't really deserve the things I said to her. She's a sensitive person and I know it probably deeply hurt her even if she didn't act like it in the moment.

C. I didn't mention it earlier but I have a brother (17M) who has athsma. He has never had any problem breathing or any complaints about my mom burning incense. If anyone would be affected by this the most it would be him and yet he doesn't care. So I feel like I just really overreacted.

Why I think I might not be the asshole here is because:

A. I have asked her before that she ventilate the house properly when she does her meditations and yet every time I can smell it. Sometimes she wont even open the windows so I have to do it myself.

B. She knows how much I dislike the smell of smoke. I have said multiple times how I hate it and every time I have smelt it in the house I've been very obviously annoyed. There was even once incident where our neighbours were having a bonfire and I literally could not sleep in my room because I could smell smoke and had to sleep on the couch. Every time she's done one of these "spiritual cleansings" I have also made it abundantly clear how much I hate this but she doesn't seem to care because it usually forces me outside.

C. As before mentioned, my brother has athsma. While it may not seem like it bothers him I don't know what the long term consequences may be for his lungs. And for my lungs too! Like, I'm not an expert but I don't think regularly breathing in smoke is very good for you. She argues it's "real natural smoke" so it's fine and I told her she should try breathing near a wildfire to see how she liked "real natural smoke."

Anyways, with all these facts considered, random strangers on the internet, AITA?

What are these acronyms?

#aita #am i the asshole

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marchiekana · 10 months

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Human heater anon here, I'll just call myself Anon H,I know you're not back from your camping which I really hope you're enjoying, camping is amazing if done right. Kinda makes me wanna do it. Anyways ! I'll leave this idea here, take it or leave it ! I just need to get this out to someone.

Ahem, I had the sudden thought of a reader who's just the most chill, laid back and nonchalant person. Someone is being annoying ? Reader doesn't care and and just keeps going. Alone ? Just Vibing. Someone disagrees with them intensely ? It's cool mate. Though it sometimes attracts people to diminish the reader because they know the reader won't care so they lash out their pent up frustration. They also annoy the characters (I'll mention them after), as in they're just TOO laid back it can be a pain. I think Silver Wolf, Serval and Kafka could be neat for that. Thanks for reading my little rant.

I'm back ehehe

But anyways this prompt made me kick my legs and giggle 🤭

Also there might be some grammer or spelling mistakes cause I typed this in like half an hour

I feel like kafka would share a similar energy too but hers is more... calculated? She'd definitely try to mess with you and make bets with the other members to see who makes you angry first(which she miserably failed at ).

Oh but she loves how you are sometimes( she loves u all the time). Your laid back attitude when someone is angry with you and seeing your nonchalant answers anger the person in front of you is free entertainment for her and the best thing is the snarky comments you give each other when you're having an argument. She'd purposefully try making you angry (which she'd, again, fail to do so)

But! Sometimes, just sometimes, she doesn't really like how you don't take things very serious. Especially when you've come back hurt from a mission or fighting with someone. or if you just fell down on the stairs. She hates how you don't take your injuries seriously and that annoys her a lot. Would subtly scold you in a soft tone but even after you shrug it off and tell her that you're fine or remark on how funny it was that this happened to you, she would raise her voice and tell you how she feels about what you're doing. But no worries after a little fight she'd apologize and tell you to take care of yourself and makes sure you do so.

But if someone really tried to hurt you both physically or with their words, that person better pray for themselves.

Now for Silver Wolf, she'd.....do nothing. She doesn't care much honestly. She likes how calm and friendly you are. Loves how you don't disturb her during her gaming sessions and will be ready to teach you any game you want. And the thing is, you're the only one who doesn't make her angry while she's teaching you cause you're pretty fast learner. Unlike a certain few.

And the way you fight is quite amusing too her. You're both very similar in that. A smug, expression and taunting words. Would definitely enjoy seeing you fight while she's on the sidelines.

Serval is an absolute tease about it. No intentions of making you angry, she just thinks it's cute.

But if, by any chance you get hurt while fighting or you happened to break one of her precious games, you better get ready cause you're in for a little ride around tantrum town. She doesn't like that you just say that you'll buy her a new one or tell her that she's overreacting with that stupid smug smile of yours. Its like You're not really sorry when you really are. Your expressions just don't match Your feeling and that causes a misunderstanding and then you're gonna get silent treatment for about three days and few death glares here and there. And maybe a few petty fights....but that's ok cause she'll forgive you in the end and tell you to atleast care about her feelings.

She absolutely loves your nonchalant smile/smug! You just look so good! She likes how cool headed you are and how well you handle situations, it could be an angry customer at her shop or anyone to say the least. Its not like she can't handle the customer herself, she wants to watch you do it, with that pretty little smug on your.

But just imagine, one day you broke her favourite trinkets given to her by her brother and she was already having a bad and then sees the condition of the trinket and an awkward smile on your face as you apologize to her. On that day, you saw a Serval that was a whole different person. She scolded you, you got angry and again, with that smug, taunting smile of yours, say something to piss her off more and she leaves. You better go ask her sorry after this and buy her some flower.

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Idk buf Kafka seems a bit too ooc in the end, honestly all of them do but oh well. thanks for listening to my rant too lol 😆

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#honkai imagines #honkai star rail #kafka hsr #kafka honkai star rail #serval hsr #serval x you #serval x reader #serval honkai star rail #kafka x reader #kafka x you #hsr kafka #silver wolf #silver wolf honkai star rail #silver wolf hsr

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batpoisonz · 2 months

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My experience as a 2S gaybian:

Before all this, I was exclusive to "contradictory" labels all the way up until early 2023. I then labeled myself as an mspec lesbian, because as a 2S person, my gender and sexuality are impacted by my cultural experiences way beyond that of someone's binary thinking. Most white transphobes couldn't even comprehend my experiences with me being 2S.

When I was exclu; it was simply just my own ignorance. I was influenced by those around me who did not understand the labels themselves. I listened to their arguments and at the time it made sense. Until inclu people came by and explained the labels to me.

I was the only one in my friend group who sat down to have a discussion with these people. and their arguments made even more sense and disputed all the arguments my friends came up with!! It was an insane and confusing experience. When you want to be loyal to your friends but something they do is just so morally wrong, you wouldn't know what to do either!

This is where I start to understand, and when I started to become critical of both sides. I thought exclu people were "radical" as well, but being "radinclu" simply just wasn't "radical" to me just for including queer people in the QUEER community, ya know?

At the time even tho my stance was changing and developing, I still fought against mspec lesbians and gays; simply because I was scared of being an outcast, that I'd get harassed by exclu people, that people would be racist to me, etc etc. but I soon learned it was the complete opposite.

AS SOMEBODY WHO IS GAYBIAN, when I was exclu I experienced MASS AMOUNTS of racism; to the point I felt like I had to leave twitter (even after I made my account private). I had people questioning my validity as a native american simply because I was an ignorant homophobe.

Say it with me: IGNORANCE DOES NOT EXCUSE RACISM!!

I even had people calling me a chimp, a creature, I've been called a chimera, I got mass reported, I got called multiple racial slurs, of which not all I could even reclaim, I got called a hermaphrodite, way way more happened. my cc got filled with racism and homophobia too!! all because I was ignorant on the subject.

Not once did I call an inclu person (while I was exclu) any of these horrible things or harass them; I just blocked them and moved on with my day.

I will admit I was a bigot for sure but I would NEVER wish any of these things on anyone.

It doesn't stop there though. when I came out as gaybian, I lost almost ALL of my online friends. I also was closeted irl because I had people at my college getting VERY hostile whenever somebody mentioned you can be a bi lesbian.

Those same people were okay with the idea of being a biplatonic lesbian.

basically, my point here is that even as you evolve and grow as a person, become more accepting of not only others but also yourself; the queer community is extremely divided. Even IF everyone agreed that "contradictory" labels weren't an issue, it still wouldn't stop the heartless attacks we all get as queers on the daily. exclus said the SAME THING about neopronouns and xenogenders 7 years ago that they're saying about mspec lesbians and gays today. AND THAT'S A PROBLEM.

The US is climbing towards eradicating all of us as queers; starting with trans people, and they're slowly inching on towards homosexuality. People WITHIN the queer community are more concerned about how we label ourselves, when we all have our own unique oppression as queers, AND SHARED OPPRESSION AS WELL!!

I've legit heard people saying the hate crimes I've experienced as a gaybian don't actually exist and that I'm overreacting because my identity isn't real.

You know who gets the same thing told to THEM?

Most queers will hear that same quote; ESPECIALLY nonbinary people and trans people in general.

everyone who is queer, is queer. whether you "agree" with the labels or not. we are QUEER for a reason.

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beaft · 4 months

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First of all fuck everyone who tells you, you just need to open your eyes to the beauty around you. These are the kind of people who have no idea what you are going through and you should acknowledge and understand that. They may mean no harm but it's an ignorant thing to say. It's up to you if you think it's worthwhile to educate them.

The first time I was very depressed was when I was 16. I loved to be outdoors, loved nature, loved to bike, to run, ride my horse. And then I didn't. The most devastating thing was that once i managed to go outside, I didn't even feel the sun's warmth anymore. I was constantly feeling cold.

That's what depression does. You won't find joy in your daily rituals, hobbys or any mundane every day things anymore.

I don't know where you are on your journey but my internal reaction to every little failure or just unnecessary deadlines or expectations I put on myself was to just go and kill myself or I hate myself.

I saw a post on here ages ago that said, you should switch hate with love whenever you're having these kinda thoughts. So whenever you think, I hate myself, go and correct yourself and tell yourself I love myself. It took me such a long time to adapt to this but I can tell you it's worth it and it did wonders to my mental health.

I'm at a point that I repeated this so much that whenever I feel bad about myself for nothing/I'm just overreacting I instantly think that I love myself. It may seem like such a small thing but it really helped me to not fall any deeper into depression. The way you talk to and about yourself matters.

Are you on medication/in therapy or is there any way you could work towards these things?

Take care and remember:

This hole is not your grave.

the trouble is, some of the people saying this shit do know what i'm going through. if it was just kale-eating, motivational-video-watching yoga mums telling me this stuff, i wouldn't care. but often it's other people who have had similar mental health struggles informing me that i should go outside and look at birds more often, because that's what helped them, and it's like:

being told "you should do this thing because it cured me" is frankly a really backhanded remark, because chances are i've tried it and it didn't do anything, which just makes me feel like even more of a hopeless case. positive self-talk is something i am trying to get better at. i am also going to try meditation, although we'll have to see how my ADHD feels about that.

i was in therapy last year, but i quit because my therapist was a complete hack (i've had enough therapists to know when they're helping, and this person was - i say this charitably - beyond useless). i'm on meds that allow me to function but don't really help my mood. on the surface, i am certainly better than i used to be; i no longer self-harm, i eat normally, i can hold down a job. every time my brain shoots me a "you're unlovable" or "you should kill yourself" i hit it with a hammer like i'm playing whack-a-mole. but some days it feels like i'm just going through the motions of improving, play-acting a mentally healthy person. i might look like i'm doing all right, but the lion in my living room is here to stay.

thank you for your words.

#this hole is not my grave!!! but boy is it deep and dark and full of worms #sorry for linking a poem in my response i know this is very cringe of me <3 but in my defense it's a good poem

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honeyjars-sims · 3 months

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2.14 A Dream Come True

Cece: Wow, your band is playing Plumbite Fest? That’s amazing!

Ben: Well, it’s one of the smaller stages and it’s at the asscrack of dawn, but it’s the biggest show we’ve ever played by far.

Cece: I’m so happy for you! What day are you playing? I want to be front row, center for this!

Ben: Well, a couple of things. Our acoustic guitarist broke his hand a few days ago and is out of commission during the festival. We could do some rearrangements, but I did tell the guys that I know a talented guitarist who can also do some killer backup vocals. So what do you say?

Cece: What??? You’re asking me to perform with your band? Onstage in front of hundreds of people?

Ben: Do you not want to? It’s ok if you don’t, but I really thought you’d jump at such a big opportunity.

Cece: It’s not that I don’t want to, I just don’t know if I can do it.

Ben: I know, it’s a lot. Look, let’s make a deal. We’ll prepare to do our set without the acoustics. You can plan to hang out and then if you feel like you can, you can join us onstage. That way you can feel out the situation without feeling obligated to do something you’re not comfortable with.

Cece: Well, I would hate to turn down the opportunity altogether. But you still haven’t told me when the show is.

Ben: Uh, that’s the other thing. It’s scheduled the week of Spring Break when we’re supposed to be in Granite Falls.

Cece: Ugh, what luck.

Ben: If you still want us to go on the trip, we can. It was my idea after all, and I'm a man of my word.

Cece: No way, I’d never ask you to turn down such a great opportunity for yourself!

Ben: If you want to go without me, that’s fine, too. I’d love to have you with me, but I know you and Lexie have been working hard at planning a great trip for us.

Cece: Yeah, we have. But I’ve worked so hard this year on building up my confidence onstage. I can’t think of a better way to prove to myself that I’ve got what it takes to be a performer than to get up there with you and play my heart out. I’ll do it!

Ben: Cecelia, I know you can do this! Let’s show Plumbite Fest what they’ve been missing out on!

Johnny: What are you two so excited about?

Cece: Well, we’re going to be playing one of the smaller stages at Plumbite Fest with Ben’s band!

Lexie: Wow, awesome!

Johnny: That’s so cool! My sister’s going to be famous!

Ben: Bad news, though, the show’s taking place during the Spring Break, so we won’t be able to go to Granite Falls. We’ll make it up to you guys, though.

Lexie: What? Are you kidding? We’ve been planning this for weeks, Cece!

Cece: I know, and I’m really sorry! I just can’t pass up this opportunity. Besides, I figured you and Johnny wouldn’t mind the alone time.

Johnny: Of course we won’t. Don’t worry about it, sis. I’m really excited for you! Make sure you get it on video so we can watch later.

[Lexie storms out of the room. Johnny follows her]

Lexie: [under breath] Stupid Ben. I knew it!

Johnny: Uh, are you ok?

Lexie: I don’t know, I’m just really upset.

Johnny: Cece and Ben can go to Granite Falls anytime, but this might be their only chance to play Plumbite Fest. Besides, Cece’s right. Now we can have some time to ourselves.

Lexie: I know, I was just really excited about all the stuff we planned together and this is so last minute…

Cece: Lexie, I’m sorry I upset you. I don’t want to back out of the trip, but playing the festival would be a dream come true for me.

Lexie: No, I’m sorry for overreacting. Of course you should go to the festival. I’m really happy for you! Really, I am.

Cece: Thanks, Lexie! Let’s plan to go to the falls this summer.

Lexie: Sure thing! It's going to be fine. Johnny and I will have a great time by ourselves.

Johnny: Even better, I’d say. Now we don’t have to have a sing-along by the campfire.

Previous | Beginning of story | Beginning of chapter | Next

#ts4 #sims 4 #the sims 4 #ts4 story #sims story #sims storytelling #simblr #simlit #stksafeharbor #sh:chapter2 #sh:ben #sh:cecelia #sh:cecilia #sh:johnny #sh:lexie #safeharborstory

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sygol · 3 months

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If one of my exes is convinced I was trying to abuse them, and that a lot of my actions were out of malice and I was trying to corner them into doing worse things. But from my point of view I had genuinely really good intentions and was mostly just confused and just trying to ask for what I wanted and needed in a relationship, and was upset when the things they promised me never happened (I felt I was asking for very reasonable things from them too). I can't say I was perfect, or that my conflict resolution skills are what I wish they were. I overreacted a lot and struggled to bring things up in a timely or effective manner. And I'm heartbroken still that I hurt someone I cared about without realizing it. But does the fact that they felt abused mean more than my efforts to have made things good for them and myself? I hate having "abuser" be something I feel I am now. And I do my absolute best to never let it happen again. But I still can't feel it was unfair to be labeled it in the first place. And I also feel as though I'll take responsibility for how I acted, but the label feels as though they won't take responsibility for how they acted. It felt so bad-faith reading of my actions and like my hurt from their actions always got turned around on me. Like I'd struggle to talk to people in public, and they'd read it as me trying to ostricise them from their friends and refusing to make efforts to meet other people? That just doesn't feel fair? I'm just awkward and didn't get along with those people but I really wanted to? Regardless I'm mostly sad to have made someone feel like they were being taken advantage of. I really cared abt them and still do but idk how I got to this position.

based on what youve told me here, i do not think you are an "abuser", or even that you "abused" them, you are not defined by the labels others place upon you, this is merely their perception; not some sort of truth.

it seems like your ex was not ready/able/willing to effectively communicate and foster a healthy relationship with you, and it seems like they let you down with empty promises, i cant exactly know this based on limited information, but speculating: your ex is probably traumatized and wrongfully projecting their fears/insecurities onto your behavior. i think they either lack fundamental understanding of who you are as a person OR is taking advantage of what they know about you to make you feel bad, the root of this is they probably dont know how to realize or address their own issues, so they are lashing out, deciding it is the fault of others.

usually when we are talking about relationships its not so much about "whos fault is it more" and moreso "are you able to share a connection" which the answer at this place & point in time seems to be: no.

i think that clearly it was not your intention to affect them like this, and if anything seems to be their own blindness rather than your actual behavior. i would advise absolving yourself of this guilt, please move on from this and learn from it to try to better connect with others who are more willing to bridge the gap with you

#asks

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ayyy-imma-ninja · 7 months

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I don’t care if it’s fucking called punishment for a reason and moon, I’m starting to hate you a lot for this overreaction and consistent denial of things. Do you wanna know something interesting within certain countries in Europe, it’s illegal to own one of any social creature because without interaction, social creatures will get depressed and will try to fucking kill themselves or will have a much shorter lives

Fairies seem to have a very similar cognitive abilities as humans, and I’m gonna tell you know some humans when forced into isolation. Try to fucking kill them selves, or go further in sane. What you’re not doing as a punishment it is torture. That makes you and every other fairy that’s pro, keeping him locked up forever without any social interaction horrible fairies!

So I don’t know what the fuck you’re going on about, but if you took a second actually listen to us and compare what we are saying to the outcome of what happened to fairies that have gone through and are going through his “punishment” I feel like you’d actually have a bit of empathy which you seem to be lacking right now. Jesus Christ. If you ever find my home, stay out of it because I don’t want you taking away any nightmares, or helping me sleep, I don’t want your brother anywhere near me if he’s just like you were thinking torture is an acceptable “punishment”

It’s not. Torture will never be an acceptable form of punishment, I’m sorry for being hard and very fucking aggressive with this, but it seems being aggressive is the only way that will get through your skull that maybe, isolating someone like this is horrid!

(by the way, humans have isolation cells for criminals that can’t be around other criminals, they still get social interaction though because we understand that without it everything it’s way worse.)

I'm going to break character and address this myself. With how aggressive this ask is, it wouldn't be appropriate for me to answer as one of the boys.

Yes. You are right. What Eclipse is going through is considered the very definition of torture, as punishment for the crime he's been accused of committing. In our world it is seen as cruel and unusual punishment, even inhuman to some. Everyone has different views and morals on that. Some hold to them, and some are willing to change their perspectives.

It's already been established that the laws of the Realm are different to the ones of our world. And in both, there are laws that not everyone likes but have to follow.

Sun has his views, that have yet to be seen. Moon has his views, which you all have seen. They both have these perspectives based off of what they know and have seen. Yet one thing that hasn't been revealed yet is their relationship with their former brother. What had led them to these views in the first place. No one except me and a handful of others know their past. The whole picture has not been revealed yet. There is a reason for that. There is a reason why they feel the way they do regarding this, and that will be explored soon.

You can agree or disagree with these views if you wish, you all have that right. Those are your morals.

But also, I feel the need to remind everyone-

this is a story.

I am glad it's gotten a lot of people invested, but please remember this is just me telling a story with characters I love with an AU I have made. Characters that all have different views about certain things that will likely clash with one another.

And I will clarify: my personal views on this subject are not reflected through the fairies, especially Moon. These differing and even questionable views are purely for intended for storytelling.

#answered ask #fairy au #dca fairy au

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wuffgang-ameowdeus-moozart · 3 months

Text

Oh no I am an anxious wreck once again. What now?

Here are a few tipps and tricks that help me personally to deal with anxiety (plus some I know work for others). Please feel free to add your own coping mechanisms in the notes!!!! Even though I technically know means to calm myself down, I always forget everything when I'm in the thick of it, so while this is mainly a reminder for myself I hope this list can help at least one other person as well :)

First of all: emotions are hard, and they are overwhelming, and shaming yourself will not make it better. Chances are it will make everything worse, actually. So don't you dare feel bad for needing help even with the "easy" stuff, or for not being able to endure as much as your peers, or even for half-assing stuff sometimes. It's fine. Like, for real. I promise it's okay. You don't need to always be at your best. You don't even need to be at your best most of the time.

What helps me personally is imagining that these struggles are affecting another person close to me. If my best friend were to call me because she needs help answering an E-Mail, or even to cancel last minute because she feels too overwhelmed to leave her house right now, I would never make her feel like crap because of it or talk about her behind her back or anything else your brain may be trying to convince you of. I know that she is at least as good a person as me (probably better tbh), so if I wouldn't do any of that, she certainly would never. In fact, believing these thoughts is actually a disservice to her, who did nothing to deserve these mean remarks (quite the opposite actually). Basically, try to twist and out-logic your own brain into being less of a cunt to you. Try guilt-tripping yourself into being kinder. The bad emotions are there anyways, might as well use them to your advantage. I can speak from experience that being anxious is a bit less unbearable if you aren't being a self-obsessed asshole on top of everything else

JUST FUCKING DO IT

If the source of your anxiety isn't a particular task you have been procrastinating on, or is something you can't just do whenever (f. ex. a job interview that's two days away), feel free to skip this part ^^

If you are still here: I know it can feel like actual hell to just do the thing. If you immediately want to click away after seeing this title I don't blame you. I mean, I am currently writing a huge ass post about anxiety instead of answering the two (2) E-Mails literally making my hands tremble. But the truth is, doing the thing is actually never as bad as it seems. Here's some stuff that maybe can help:

-> Remember that it's never been the end of the world before, so surely it won't start being it now. If you've already been through a similar situation: remember that it isn't the first time you've felt this way; remember that doing the thing wasn't as bad as you'd feared and, most importantly; remember how you felt after doing it. If this is the first time you feel like that, I'm sorry. I promise you aren't stupid for "overreacting", and I promise it will feel at least a little bit better if you just get it over with. And when you've managed the first time, you can now use that as an example instead of taking some stranger on the internet on his word. Worst comes to worst, you can still anon hate me (jk please don't)

-> Rewarding yourself. Remember that putting yourself down tends to make things worse. Allow yourself to be proud for your achievements, yes even the small ones that most people barely even think about. Because sometimes shit is just hard, but you still did it, and that's fucking awesome !!! For me personally just the knowledge that my anxiety will lessen (and I will probably get some good sleep - emotions are so fucking exhausting) is enough most of the time, but you can also give yourself a little treat afterwards. You've earned it!

-> Hide it in between chill tasks. Like right now, I'm writing this instead of my fucking E-Mail. I am a bit calmer since this is distracting myself from the daunting task of typing a few words. So I am now going to open my mails on another tab, type this shit, and send it. And I know that when I did that I will feel better about myself. And even if I fuck up somehow (how you ask? i don't fucking know), I will immediately have this task to come back to so I don't have the chance to overthink it. I FUCKING DID IT I AM THE CHAMPION OF THE WORLD

-> If you have a bunch of stuff you swore yourself you would do (a bunch can also mean like 2 btw) starting can seem even more daunting (even if it is, as aforementioned, "only" two). So I am very happy to present written lists my absolute beloved. In my experience, stuff is a lot less overwhelming if it isn't only living inside your head. You get a feeling of accomplishment when you can cross something off your list. You don't have to keep panicking about forgetting something (since everything is already written down on your list.) You can even break down bigger tasks into smaller more manegeable ones (f. ex. instead of "clean your room" -> "1. do your bed; 2. fold your clothes; 3. etc etc".) It's great because even if you don't manage the entire big task you still feel less like a failure since you've got proof of all the small accomplishments you did manage. Plus it's easier to continue on another day since you know exactly what you have to do and have proof of everything you already managed as a motivator.

-> Accept help. Be on the phone with a friend while doing the thing (if possible, of course). Ask your friends to be your hypeman before and after doing the thing. Get reassurance from other people. Go to your friend's house to ask them to read your E-Mails, summarize them verbally, and then type an appropriate answer for you (can you already tell me and electronic mail aren't in the best of terms?) Making things harder on yourself on purpose isn't being strong it's being stupid

-> already mentioned it a bunch of times, I know, but the thing that really helps for me is comparing with past experiences. I know I will feel better after I do it because that's always what happens when my brain blows things out of proportion. I know I can do this because I did even scarier stuff and it went well. Or even: if I manage to do this seemingly super scary thing, I will be able to use it as a motivator for smaller stuff in the future. I mean, what even is a fucking E-Mail in comparison to going to a social event on your own ??! (seriously, do it. in my experience it's surprisingly easy to find friends if you look pathetic enough, plus a lot of things seem a bit less paralyzing in comparison)

-> I turn it into a competition, or a game. If I do the thing I win. If I don't do the thing the anxiety wins. And I refuse to let that happen because I'm competitive AND a sore loser <3 so I do the thing. and then I feel a bit better

JUST DON'T THINK ABOUT IT. THINKING IS THE ANTITHESIS OF DOING. (which you can also use to your advantage, à la better to think about that unhealthy coping mechanism and why you shouldn't do it than to stop thinking about it and actually doing it instead. But that isn't the point right now)

DISTRACTIONS

Sometimes there just isn't anything you can do. Sometimes all you can do is wait. Sometimes you don't even know why the fuck you're feeling like that. And that fucking sucks.

I know there are some people who need an absence of stimuli in order to calm down. (If that's you, please leave some of your own pointers in the notes! I don't really have any ideas for that one tbh)

For me, the opposite is the case. I can't count the times my mom has told me to "try meditating!" or "don't do more than one thing at the same time it'll only stress you out even more!", unaware that giving my thoughts free reign would make everything so much worse.

I need to overwhelm myself in order to be able to forget about my anxiety for a while. Sometimes doing a task I've been dreading is easier after distracting myself for a few hours (being anxious is very tiring so if you let it run its course in the back of your mind for a while you'll have less energy for it later ^^). Here's some stuff that could help (though it should be noted that a) not everything will work on everyone and b) sometimes it just doesn't work. even if it worked the last five times. Don't ask me why it is what it is):

-> Do something (really anything) while listening to a video essay/podcast/audiobook. That's my go-to classic. Feel your mind slipping away from whatever you're doing? Force yourself to really listen to what is being said. Sometimes it helps to mouth the words along to my audio of choice (while still doing your thing at the same time!!) Speed it up (I've usually got my stuff at 1.75x or 2x). Assume that pretty much everything listed below can be done while having this as a second layer of distraction

-> Learn something new. I was literally just teaching myself the tabs for Every Breath You Take by The Police and 26 by Paramore on the guitar before starting this. I tried learning finnish and irish for a while there (learning vocabulary, trying to translate sth, learning grammar, etc.). Sometimes it can take a bit of time to get into it, but once you're there it's easy to lose yourself in it (in my experience at least.) And you can always start another video essay in the background!

-> Baking. I usually do half or fourth the recipe to a.) waste less ingredients; b.) have less stuff to eat so you can go bake more stuff sooner; and c.) feel less bad if it doesn't turn out how you hoped. Plus you can also make yourself more likeable by giving some to your neighbours ;)

-> Comfort book/series/movie/etc. I'll be honest, this one almost never works for me, but I know that for some people it does so on the list it goes

-> Take a walk. Touch some grass. Go outside. Personally have very mixed feelings towards this one. Used to do it all the time during lockdown (walking nowhere for literal hours while listening to music), but when it doesn't help it makes things much much worse (in my experience) So maybe be a bit careful? If you want to get away from your thoughts this is...bad. But otherwise (like if you just have the feeling of anxiety without a specific reason) it's worth a try

-> Do maths. I'm serious. For a while there I couldn't sleep, so I'd go on the net, search for equasion exercises, and just go wild. Don't look at the answer: this isn't the point. It's something with a fixed procedure and no consequences if you mess up (you won't even know if you mess up). Maybe instead of equations you find long division more relaxing. Just try not to think of school, put the pressure away, and give it a go.

-> Go to your comfort place. This is also a bit of a tricky one. First of all, not everyone has one of those. Or maybe you can't really go there (like, I always calm down when I'm at the beach. I adore the ocean. But I don't have sea anywhere near me, so sucks to be me i guess). But if you do have a place near you it's worth a try. Sometimes after a particular stressful therapy session i just...go chill at the library for a while. It helps :)

-> Blorbo scrolling. I personally prefer looking at a bunch of art and comics (visual stuff) since i don't really have the concentration to read when I'm anxious, but see what works best for you <3

-> Menial tasks. I love them. Sorting stuff that actually doesn't really matter (like taking all your books from your shelves and trying a new way to organize them). The already mentioned maths exercises. Washing the dishes/putting them back in their place (you can combine that one with the baking hehe). Volunteering work can also be pretty helpful: they often need help with menial tasks plus you can feel good about yourself for helping. Recently started helping at my local animal shelter and it's actually pretty great !

-> Sports. I personally hate sports and always feel worse afterwards, but so many people talk about it that it must be of help to someone out there. What I used to do when I got suddenly overrun by emotions is taking my skipping rope and jumping as fast as I physically could til I felt a bit better (and sweaty ew)

-> Sometimes I like starting a small project; depending on the mood either with no pressure to finish (or intention to show anyone ever because eww), or posting it in hope for praise that'll make me feel a bit better about myself heh. Just something else I can focus on. (ex. g. I've got a meeting I'm nervous about tomorrow so I started writing this huge-ass post) Just remember: IT DOESN'T HAVE TO BE GOOD!! JUST CREATE! I PROMISE BEING CREATIVE AND/OR DOING STUFF IS AWESOME!! (or if nothing else at least frustrating enough to overshadow the anxiety lol)

-> In the wise words of mother mother: Dance and cry, and cry and dance and cry. (And sing. And scream. Or get out that skipping rope. Just let it out my dude.)

-> Watch a show in a foreign language faster (like 2x speed) and with subtitles (less time to read, more required focus, less brain power to panic)

-> immersive reading (audio + text); especially effective if you do it in a language you are currently learning or one that is similar (but not the same!) to your native tongue (f. ex. portuguese and spanish)

-> Try sleeping. Doesn't always work, but at least it wastes time.

I THINK I'M ABOUT TO HAVE A PANIC/ANXIETY ATTACK

-> Strong sudden stimulant. Like smelling a very strong perfume or taking a freezing shower.

-> Just. Let it wash over you. It sucks, yes, but it'll be over. Try keeping calm. I know, easy to say when you yourself aren't currently going through it, but anxiety about a future attack will not, in fact, make things less worse. Once again, remembering past attacks can help as well? It didn't kill you then, it won't kill you now. (My therapist suggested using a mental image, like huge waves or something. I personally don't do that but maybe it'll help)

-> Cover your ears and listen to your heart. Key point: this is NOT aiming to drown out noise, but to ground yourself by listening to your own body (bloodstream and creaking bones etc) (ty anon <3)

-> I'm not sure whether this'll work with panic attacks as well (according to google one of the key differences is that these don't really have a trigger and just....happen) and it probably won't be viable in every situation. But just. Be enough of a spiteful little shit to turn your breakdown into a powermove. (The distressing emotions are there anyways might as well make use of them). You told your teacher you get extreme anxiety when you have to speak in public and they ignored you because the school system actually hates kids? Look them right in the eyes as you start hysterically sobbing so they feel really bad, maybe be extra subdued the next few lessons. As far as you know it'll get you a few pity points that'll make a difference in your overall grade! (Pretty sure I got a better grade in my arts finals than i deserved) Someone knowingly breaks a boundary you set because "oh you've been doing so well" and "it's an irrational fear so it isn't real anyways" or whatever they tell themselves to justify it? This is your chance to make them really see how what they did is wrong (and hopefully will make them think twice before pulling shit like that again). If you warned them, they are literally asking for it. And it'll seem that much more impressive when you are having a good day for once and manage to get through it without one (you've earned that extra credit). Maybe I'm just a bit of a vindictive person, but reframing the narrative like that in my head gives me some semblance of control, which makes it all a bit less scary.

IT DIDN'T FIT ANYWHERE ELSE BUT IS STILL IMPORTAT

This is mostly me reminding myself that it's fine tbh. Because it is.

-> Remember that you can just do shit. I don't know how else to say this, but sometimes my anxiety makes it feel like hiding away in my room is my only option. But that's not true! There is so much stuff you can do, I'm always in awe for a while when I get this through my thick skull once again. Like, you can just go to places. You can just write to your friends. You can just start a chat with that cool mutual you're too nervous to directly interact with. You can move. You can change jobs. You can redecorate your house. You can get into a random train and only get out at the last station, wherever that may be. YOU CAN JUST DO SHIT?!?!?! ISN'T THAT FUCKING AWESOME?!!!!!!!!

-> Extreme emotions can have unpleasant physical side effects. Sweating. Body odor. No appetite and/or extreme hunger cravings (sometimes at the same time??). Diarrhea. It sucks (especially when it continues on for multiple days and your oh so kind peers make sure to constantly remind you of those physical symptoms you are already overly aware of). But it's normal and it's fine. It doesn't make you gross, I promise.

-> THIS TOO SHALL PASS (that's it. Sometimes it's good to remind yourself. This too shall pass.)

-> Sometimes I just do small harmless shit to prove my anxious lizard brain wrong. Randomly say hi on that group chat you haven't entered for months. Create something you aren't really happy with and post it anyways, just cuz you can. Go do something on your own. The more you prove your fears wrong with little things like that, the easier it gets (especially if you have to do bigger scary stuff). Spite can be your best friend. (Plus easy way to gain more points in my mental competition hehehe)

-> Sometimes, despite your best efforts, you will fuck up. You will barely be able to say a word in the social event you forced yourself to go in order to meet cool people. You will be so obviously anxious at your friend's birthday that she will still remember that over a year later (despite your best efforts to hide it at the time). You will get an anxiety attack because of something you thought you had already gotten over months ago. And it sucks, but more importantly, it's fine. This too shall pass. This is another reason why the previous point is so important: it's harder to hold these incidents over your head if you have so many other experiences where you managed to prove yourself.

-> YOU get to decide when you want to try confronting a fear. Nobody else can do that for you, no matter how often they mention "exposure therapy" and shit (it's about the control once again. in my experience it's important for it to be your choice). Occasionally hiding away doesn't make you a failure. There are always more chances, it's never too late to start. Already mentioned it a bazillion times, but this shit is exhausting and you are well within your right to stay in your comfort zone and rest.

-> I don't know if it's just a me thing but self reminder to avoid lactose and gluten when overly anxious. (i never do but i am aware of it that should count for something)

-> gender-affirming stuff can help ^^

-> Not viable to everybody, but sometimes I just delete all social media from my phone. You can still go there through browser of course (that's where I'm actually currently writing this) but just not having the icon on the phone can already feel somewhat of a relief (social media in this case also including messaging apps like discord or WhatsApp or fucking electronic mail my beloathed). That's actually what I am planning to do immediately after posting this thing that came out a bit more personal and stream-of-conscousness than initially planned. You won't even be able to tell cuz I never tag my queues hehehe

-> mentally dunking my stupid anxious lizard brain into salt water rn. Fuck you. I'm posting this. I'm leaving my house tomorrow instead of calling in sick. I'm winning.

#i apologize if there are spelling errors or sentences that dont make sense (my focus is a bit shit rn lol)#once again hope this can help someone? plus always open to more suggestions etc etc #it feels a bit hypocritical to be posting this rn tbh since i am not dealing with my anxiety that well atm tbh #but then i look back to how it was like two years ago and actually i *did* improve even if only a bit so like fuck you too lizard brain #i hope you get to look out of your window and realize that you too have come far <3 #i love being a lil cheeseball hehehehe #anxiety #actually anxious #actually anxiety #uhm idk how else to tag this i guess ill rely on rbgs lol

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