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#and I feel like if people are going to make ‘bisexuality is being attracted to ALL women and ONE man’ jokes
kafkaguy · 2 years
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havin a gender crisis at the train station lol #epic
#reading some lesbian comics and marvelling at the butch experience.......... and then also going into Brain Explode Mode bcos#of how similar it is to the transmasc experience#understanding why so many trans dudes are like 'oh what im just butch or a very masculine woman'#and butches are like 'oh what if im a trans guy'#THE VENN DIAGRAMS BRO. INTERSECTIONS AND CONNECTIONS AND SHARED EXPERIENCES#we are FRIENDS but also its making me feel all . What If She Pronouns. What If More Nonbinary Than I Thought...#cos the thing IS as a bisexual i do feel like my sexuality and gender identity are so intertwined its sometimes annoying#so i cannot think of it as like Ah Yes I Like Men Therefore Im a Homosexual#its a like. i like EVERYONE therefore i am EVERYTHING cos ALL my attraction feels Gay with a capital G#im gay for women im gay for men im gay for everything in between and outside#but i dont see my attraction to women as attraction to the opposite gender cos i dont see women as Opposite or necessarily separate#and vice versa i dont see my attraction to guys as . excuse the outdated language - 'same sex attraction'#because i dont necessarily see myself as A Man . yknow?#the binary is fucked identity is everchanging and ever molding and i am just a little wavelength of light floating through space#THEREFORE. idk where i was going with this#i just think that queerness and humanity are so much more complicated than any of us realise#and sometimes it is so frustrating and tiring seeing other people like me and wjth the same experiences as me#being so conservative and so assuming and trying to generalise something so personal#i am not Doing Trans Wrong . there is no wrong to be trans imo#and i also think we need to be kinder to detransitioned people + transmasc lesbians / transfem gays + nonbinary bisexuals ok thanks bye
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aroaessidhe · 5 months
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2023 reads / storygraph
A Crown So Cursed
conclusion to the Nightmare-verse trilogy, a YA urban portal fantasy
follows a Black girl trained to fight nightmare-monsters in Wonderland, to protect the people of both worlds
but the nightmares start coming for her in the real world - at a convention, and even her own home, and the crew have to prepare to fight a greater evil tied to Wonderland’s past
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revanchistsuperstar · 2 years
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Oh lol I just realized something that I just never explicitly mentioned here after taking a hiatus from tumblr and then just coming back like nothing happened:
When I was running this blog back in the day and it was an SPN blog (yeah I know) that slowly shifted into a Star Wars blog, and I was vaguely popular cosplayer, I was pretty well known for the fact that identified as genderqueer and bisexual.
Yeah I went back on my adhd medication and actually was able to focus on the triggers for my dysphoria and what I was feeling for the first time in 10 years and realized I’m a gay man whoops
#concerta done transed my gender#but honestly seriously I came out to my Facebook friends yesterday but it’s something I’ve been feeling for a while now#there’s a whole essay I could write about how I came to this conclusion#that basically I was dating people who were attracted to women and who treated me like a woman sexually#and I get really bad dysphoria from being treated sexually as a woman when I’m presenting more masculine#so basically I’ve been cosplaying as a hot femme AFAB enby for the last 12 years#and not medically transitioning because I was subconsciously afraid of it making me unattractive as a femme#but I have finally come to the conclusion of fuck that I’m a man#who cares if going on t makes me less hot as a girl I’m not a girl I just do drag#starting HRT in December and I’m so excited#I do eventually want top surgery but I honestly don’t have much dysphoria around my chest so I’m fine with waiting till the fat redistributa#redistributes whoops#and I gain some muscle from working out and whatnot#my dysphoria is much more around my hips and my height#also yeah I do still vaguely identify with bisexuality I do sometimes find women hot#but yeah I’ve always been more into men and I’ve always been open about that#ya boy is 29 years old and I’m finally figuring this shit out#lol also love that for the longest time I’m was like ‘I can’t be a man! I’m so feminine!#……..like y’all it never crossed my mind I just might be a fucking faggot 🤣🤣🤣#but hi yeah I’m Jensen and I’m a fruit. he/they please!#concerta transed my gender#adding that tag for my blog sorting transition tracking purposes
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rainymoodlet · 2 years
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💖💜💙 happy pride month, y'all! 💖💜💙
my simself living my best life and being the masc and femme bitch i can't bring into reality right now. my journey of accepting my sexuality was fraught with toxic friend groups that tried to control my identity, my own history with abuse affecting the way i felt toward women, and my own experience as a cis woman in this world. getting caught in the trap of top or bottom, masc or femme, when in reality, the entire point of living life true to yourself is living it as true to yourself as possible. if i want to be your leather jacket gf with her arm around your shoulder one day and your glamour babe whose lap you still sit on the next, i can.
i ultimately identify as bisexual, but that was because i fought for that title. i was bullied out of owning my own self by friends who thought that a friend group consisted of tokens, that i'd be "copying" if i felt comfortable saying i was bisexual right after somebody else did. pansexuality was the first place i learned to accept who i was, and so while i reclaim bisexuality for the girl who hurt herself and was hurt by others for her attraction to women, something she was scared was predatory, something she was scared she was perpetuating out of the men that hurt her, i thought i would give a tribute to the spectrumless love that taught me what self-truth and self-acceptance is. 💗💛💙
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babydarkstar · 8 months
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ohhhhh man people on here will be so willfully ignorant about their biphobia in favor of stupid fucking pseudo labels “how is pan/omnisexuality transphobic and biphobic🥺i dont understand and ive never understood even though i have 5 bisexuals explaining it to me in this comment section and how it’s offensive to them for me to assume they only like cis men and women🥺bi people say they are only attracted to 2 genders so whats the big deal🥺” im literally going to smack you in the mouth with my baseball bat. blocked
#im tired. lmao#genuinely people need to get off this website and develop a personality that isnt their sexuality#like i get that it becomes a huge part of who u are once u accept yourself but it’s like#did you have a personality before. what are your interests. do u have a favorite color that isnt your flag#im a hater.#i will continue to be until ppl realize how much bisexuals are scorned#and honestly it’s upsetting that theyve always been so scorned and shunned and made fun of#that bisexuals feel the need to label themselves as something entirely new#something that means the same exact. EXACT. thing as bi#‘well it’s more comfortable for me to use this’—have you ever thought about why that is.#have you thought about what makes you so uncomfortable about the label? is it because you think you’ll be seen as tr*nsphobic?#or stigmatized as ‘actually being straight’ like others in the community have done for decades?#im so. i just spent all day exercising my brain with schoolwork#i go onto the gay trending tag and one of the first posts is just. hoardes of biphobic content and comments#im just here to have a good time and it gets worse every fucking day on here#you’ll listen to everyone in the fucking alphabet except when bisexuals say youre being oppressive and PHOBIC you gang up on them#and threaten actual violence#also bisexuality is NOT. and never HAS BEEN. attraction to 2 genders. get the fucking prefix assumption out of your tiny fucking head#anyways i love you transppl who stand in solidarity w us. you are the real ones
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arthur-r · 7 months
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also this song is hitting me in the face so bad right now i’m not used to wanting sexual autonomy that’s a new college experience and this song is ringing in my ears about it
#tell me baby baby do i walk like a boy do i speak like a boy do i stand like a boy sorry babe you keep asking#do i kiss like a boy should i spit like a boy may i fuck other boys????#idk. feels like disability and transness are trying to take me away from myself. and it’s a weird like#this is not a dilemma i’ve really had in the past?? like i was pretty happy with being infantilized and de-sexed#(that’s a lie it still feels bad shdhdf) but like i don’t know like i’ve never been LOOKING for attention like that but now it’s like#i dont know. like now im receiving it and i want it but it feels wrong#like i’m an attractive girl or like i’m a tragedy to be rescued and held close or like i’m a piece of fucking meat#depending who i am talking to. i just want to take the reins back i want to be the person who defines myself????#have never felt as strongly that i want to be a gay man. but im just being compartmentalized and it makes me uncomfortable#anyway i want to feel strong and competent. and soft and kind but i want to be a fucking man about it you know????#i want to be myself without that making me into a woman in other peoples minds. and i’m really struggling with that#straight men being into me = not fun. the gay guy who liked me was creepy and the bisexual guy im hanging out with worries me slightly#but that’s not his fault you know?? but like i felt so much more secure when i thought he was gay because now i can’t escape the idea that#he likes me in the way he likes women. and that’s internalized transphobia that’s externalizing into biphobia like it’s really not good#but it is. scary and weird. idk i kind of just want to go back and back up and save all of this for after midterms shdhdhf#i dont know. i’m gonna go to sleep for real now but the point is this is a good song and it’s the struggle i’m having right now#and it’s what i was feeling during my flare-up last week that made me feel so broken and disconnected from myself and my sexuality#i dont know. i really like the first guy and we should hangout later. i’m gonna have a nap and figure out later what i’m doing today#but yeah everything is just weird. my flesh to jail my soul i just feel like i could fall!!!!#in the meantime im just gonna focus on experiencing depression. and have a nap about it. wish me luck shdhdf#me. my post. mine.#delete later#friends only#nsfw-ish#????#ask to tag#vent cw#(sort of. just feeling weird)
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pippin-katz · 8 months
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Alex & Being Bisexual 🩷💜💙
I've seen a lot of people complaining about Alex not having as big of a crisis over being bisexual as he did in the books, but I feel like a lot of people are overlooking the development he does go through.
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Henry is the first guy he has felt attracted to that he actually knew prior to getting physically involved.
Alex & Miguel
Nora's asks specifically about men Alex has "been with", not men he's liked or interested him. She means physically, and he knows that too. Alex doesn't even bother with giving any context or details for his high school hook up. His description of his hook up with Miguel is straightforward, direct, and factual, because he doesn't have an emotional attachment to that moment or Miguel.
This, and his interactions with Miguel, gives the impression that they don't really know each other that well. It seems like they met during the campaign, made out in a hot tub, and now occasionally they talk at school.
They don't seem like friends, rather acquaintances after a one night stand, which is pretty much what they did. Their first conversation is mostly Miguel trying to get quotes for his journal and flirting with him rather than any kind of real discussion.
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Gifs courtesy of @phakphumm from this post
Alex isn't stupid; he knows Miguel is flirting with him, however he chooses not to acknowledge it. He doesn't discourage him, but he does not encourage him either.
He avoids saying anything about it at all. His expressions after the eyelashes comment show him at a bit of a loss for how to respond. Alex seems flattered by the compliment, but doesn't seem to have any real desire to hook up again.
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Everything Miguel says, he says in an attempt to get something out of him, whether it be flirting to hook up and/or get quotes for his journal.
Same thing at the state dinner; Alex isn't fully paying attention cause he's busy staring at Henry, but Miguel opens with compliments, specifically about his memo, which is definitely an attempt to flatter him. Then he starts asking direct questions about the campaign, Alex doesn't answer, and he walks away. They're not really friends.
New Territory
It's one thing to admit being somewhat attracted to the same sex, under limited, physical circumstances. Lots of people often joke about "being straight/gay but I would sleep with this person".
It's another thing to develop an attraction to a person you know of the same sex when you've never had those feelings before. It's not just physical anymore, because you know and like this person outside of that context, and the physical intimacy gains a new meaning.
Alex VS Feelings
This is a new feeling for Alex. This man practically makes out with two women he barely knows without any qualms, but when he's waiting to see Henry? His close friend who he knows and plans to kiss?
He is nervous; not just a little nervous either:
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Alex is a pretty confident guy, able to host massive parties and dance without any reservations about it, unlike Henry who awkwardly bounces. He's a fantastic public speaker. Excluding the wedding, which were extreme circumstances, he's able to navigate a room comfortably. We know from the closet conversation that he used to get scared, but it's clear based on his campaign efforts, the DNC speech, and so on that he's grown into his role and can play it well.
Here, Alex can't sit still. He doesn't know how to stand. He's shifting around, almost pacing. He visibly tries to muster up the confidence we know he has, but can't. He's trying to pose, or look confident, and almost gets there, but the second the door opens, he panics and just stands there.
"But that's just cause he really likes Henry!"
Yes, exactly; Henry is his first step towards fully realizing his identity.
Once the tension is broken, Alex is confident again and doesn't hesitate anymore. He may not be completely sure of his identity, but he is completely sure that he wants Henry. Those thoughts take priority when he kisses him. He knows physical intimacy. He knows how to kiss with someone regardless of who they are. He has been with a couple men, and is a man himself, so he knows what feels good. His confidence stays intact during their exchange when they get to his bedroom.
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There are very small moments where you can see his nerves poke through.
When Henry pushes Alex over the couch, not only is it surprising to him, it also disconnects them for a few seconds. He has a chance to look at Henry while they're not touching or kissing, no direct distraction.
When Henry starts undoing his pants, he looks up, inhales quickly, blinks a couple times, and swallows; it's almost like he's thinking "okay this is actually happening now". Again, no direct distraction, as Henry isn't doing anything yet, and Alex isn't touching or kissing him.
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Both moments go by fast though because he's focused on what he knows, the physical part. He knows he wants Henry physically, so he can focus on that, and deal with the other feelings later.
Alex is aware that he has feelings toward Henry that are new to him. He doesn't know what they mean, and it's nothing even close to what he feels later in Paris and at the lake house, but they're starting to form. He's the one who suggests that he and Henry see each other again, and you would have to be blind not to see the brief disappointment on his face when Henry says it has to be very casual. It's also important to note that this is right after Alex comes out.
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The Bisexual Label
While his feelings make Alex nervous, Henry is still his friend and he feels comfortable around him. He's the first person he comes out to; he was unable to say anything definitive about his identity during his conversation with Nora, despite her best efforts to help him.
Henry is the first person he tells and he distinctly shows uncertainty when he first uses the bisexual label:
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He's serious about it; not overly serious, but he's coming out very formally. He's nervous, even though he's telling Henry, who he literally hooked up with five minutes ago. Henry already knows he's attracted to men. Alex is not nervous about that; it is clearly the label that he's uncertain about.
Confidence
A lot of people get taken by surprise when they start questioning their identity because they had simply never thought about it before.
The uncertainty Alex has about his identity was initiated by his feelings for Henry. Alex clearly never considered the idea of being in an actual relationship with a man. Without Henry, he may have never figured out that he was fully bisexual. He may have continued fooling around occasionally with guys, never giving serious thought to the other possibilities, unless/until he met someone like Henry who basically smacks him in the face with a mirror.
Being with Henry makes him truly think about himself, and come to the conclusion that he's bisexual. Seeing/dating Henry also makes him more comfortable and confident in his identity over time.
While Alex hadn't acknowledged Miguel's advances before, after he sleeps with Henry, he actively calls him out on it and refuses without hesitation as soon as Miguel puts the suggestion out there. Miguel even says "Well, I don't anymore", confirming that had been his intention in earlier scenes.
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He had been trying to hook up with him again, and because Alex never addressed it, Miguel thought that it was possible. Alex may not have addressed his comments, but Miguel could see for himself that they had a positive reaction; he felt flattered and bashful. That response coupled with the fact that Alex did not outright tell him to stop was enough reason for Miguel to think it could happen again.
Also, Alex told Nora that he got the feeling Miguel wanted to hook up again, but that he was a journalist, which does not say he wouldn't be down. He never says he wouldn't want to; instead he expresses his apprehension to the idea due to his job. So for all intents and purposes, before Henry came along, Miguel was correct to think it was a possibility.
This seems to be the first time Alex has ever actually addressed their tension, and it occurs after he starts seeing Henry and using the bisexual label.
Owning The Bi Label
Then Zahra finds him and Henry the next morning. She is kind enough not to tell Ellen immediately, because even if she won't admit it, she does care about Alex a lot and recognizes the importance of something like this. However, she makes it very clear that he needs to tell her ASAP or she will.
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When he comes out to his mom, he is significantly more sure of himself when he uses the bisexual label. He laughs and uses the shorten term "bi" which is a small detail but indicates his confidence, compared to how he cautiously said "bisexual" when coming out to Henry. He's not at all nervous to use the term, and says it grinning.
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This is also indicative of his confidence in his label because Alex doesn't lead with his sexuality. He leads with meeting someone, and clarifying that it's a man, and that it's Henry. So once they're on the couch talking, Ellen is also already aware that he is attracted to men, but this time, he's prompted about his label and he shows zero nerves about using the term "bi".
Queer Identity
By the end of the movie, Alex is able to publicly refer to himself as having a queer identity. Obviously, he was outed against his will, but he is still able to stand up and acknowledge who he is without nerves about it. He has been with Henry for a year, and he knows who he is, and he’s not ashamed of it. As he says, the leaks were an issue of privacy, not shame. Alex is not afraid to say who he is, and he is queer, he is bisexual. He’s a different person than he was before Henry. He’s learned about himself because of him.
Does he have a complete, computer-error-noise breakdown over it? No, he doesn’t, but he does not immediately start waving a bi flag around either.
Okay, that’s all! This took so freaking long to put together, but I hope it helps people understand how his bisexuality is addressed in the movie. Just because he has a different journey than he did in the book does not mean he did not have a journey at all, and I hope this allows people to see it more clearly! Thank you for reading!
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officialspec · 1 month
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can you pleeeeease post your dm sexuality/gender hcs on here.... 🥺 i don't have a twitter but i wanna know. it's like a pandora's box to me now i'm like scratching at the door. let me in
heres the link 2 the thread (mild spoilers btw) ill post a transcript under the cut for ppl who dont have twitter
first off i think laios relationship to sex is super removed for like 50 reasons without even getting into his actual sexuality
he grew up in a place with very repressed ideas about sex and has a lot of fear about asserting his presence in situations
his special interest takes precedent over any social interactions he has and the level of closeness he feels towards people
he has a hard time figuring out his feelings towards other people both bc hes autistic and bc he has freaky deviantart fetishes that make sex in his mind a very abstract concept <- this one is me projecting mostly
that aside, i feel like gender-wise hes attracted to ppl so infrequently it may as well be entirely case-by-case
the idea of him being gay appeals to me from the 'raised with traditional values he Does Not fit into/hasnt begun to question it yet' perspective, i lauve characters who put a lot of stock into performing a role thats expected of them and fail miserably for unknown (gay) reasons
from his perspective tho i dont think he would ever really label himself anything. hes going to pride parades in the shirt+shorts Ally Fit to clap for his friends
hes also 'cis by indifference' imo... i love tmasc laios hcs it just doesnt mesh w his personal history to me. i do think hes got some kind of therian gender thing going on (not trans or nb but a secret third thing) but i cant see him changing anything abt his appearance/pronouns to accommodate that post-canon. hes just doin his thang
falin is in a similar boat for gender. i LOOVE tfem falin but the village repression thing has been bugging at me so i dont think i subscribe to it anymore (canon purist sorry) BUT if u hold that hc i am clapping and cheering regardless
instead i was propagandised to a while back and i LOVEEE the idea that being fused w a male dragon and the residual traits she has after being revived have given her a type of gender euphoria she didnt realise she was missing. a little boygirl swagger if u will
sexuality-wise i also dont think she would care to label herself, shes a lesbian by virtue of only being interested in One woman and zero other people. without marcille i do think shes still exclusively attracted to women, and i like to imagine she might experiment around a bit during her travels post-canon (pre-relationship). hearing abt it might put marcille on the news though
marcille is very simple That is a transfem lesbian. she cant get pregnant, shes obsessed w being femme and all that combined w her half-tallman struggles to be seen as 'properly feminine' by elf standards reads very transfeminine to Me. also her bookboy crush REEKS of comphet its not subtle
i think a more comfortable marcy might have the space to experiment w being elf butch like her manga boys but thats mainly self indulgence for me. utena could have saved her
senshi is gay his whole thing is abt not being able to perform dwarven masculinity to a proper standard (soft hearted, not as strong or rugged as his peers) which is like gaycoding 101. also hes a bear. homosexuality be damned by boy can work a grill
adding onto this i rly think senshi got some type of euphoria from being an elf in the changeling chapters. he was feeling himself so much i think he was using it as an outlet to have fun being a little fem and fruity without needing to justify it. do u understand
i dont have any particular opinions abt him gender-wise beyond that. his bulge is an essential part of his character design but i also saw a transmasc senshi a couple days ago that made me nod my head thoughtfully so i could go either way
chilchuck is cis and bisexual this is just canon. not even just his old man crush on senshi altho i do think thats very funny but they put his ass on a cover themed like hes in a dating sim with all the men and women in the cast and then slapped it in front of a chapter called "bicorn". i simply cant pass up that kind of overt signaling. its so fucking funny what else is there to say truly
izu to ME is a transmasc aroace lesbian (this one has the least basis in canon i just know it to be true) shes a little genderfluid with it nd uses he/she i think. i like to imagine she consistently uses masculine personal pronouns to refer to herself either way tho (boku, ore)
i think izutsumis gender/sexuality is entirely secondary in priorities to her body dysphoria. she has a lot of learning and acceptance 2 do before that kind of self discovery is on the docket and in my mind eschewing gender on some level is part of that. get sillay
shuro is cishet but at least he feels bad about it. next
kabru is a transmasc bisexual this is also practically text. his whole thing of being treated like a doll by milsiril to put in pretty dresses, plus i think it would be pretty easy for him to stealth in the west since tallmen are seen as inherently more masculine than elves
(i also think changing genders is just more common for elves. theyre androgynous enough that it wouldnt be hard and like who in their right miiiiind would be the same gender for 500 years. dwarves too)
i think he started presenting as male socially in the west but didnt need to consider medical transition until he moved to a more mixed culture where other races might see him as a woman
i dont have to explain the bisexual part. have u seen him
namari is a butch bisexual this is just canon straight up. shes not transmasc but i think the default settings for dwarven women is like 4 years of T regardless. shes a hit at all the local cruising spots despite her renfaire nerdisms i know this
and just bc im thinking abt em kiki and kaka are identical and kiki is tfem :} theyre both attracted to women but kaka is a sub so i forgive him
THATS ALL 4 NOW theres a lot of characters so i cant have thoughts abt all of them at once but i hope this was good. im right about everything forever as per usual
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chucktaylorupset · 1 year
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goddddd it’s fine!! its fine!!! its okay if if 12 year old girls decide they’re asexual and look back and realize that actually it was just puberty and the gross sexualization of women that alienated them from their feelings of attraction and actually now she feels she was always allo. That’s allowed! That’s okay! Its not the end of the world if some of the people coming home to the label of asexuality are actually arriving at a way station onto what will be a better place for them. Cause you know if what she wanted was to feel she had the language to give herself permission to not be obligated to engage in sexual acts, to not exist as a sexual foodstuff for the consumption and digestion of others, If she needed the world asexual to shield her like that that’s okay!!! Cause whats important is she found a way to not do the things she wasn’t ready to do. What you wanna say no? No, you are obligated to figure out your attraction to others and the torture of its existence in a complicated fucked up world with language that doesn’t always sink home. Who is she hurting. Oh yeah it’s on a twelve year old to never be wrong about who they think they’re becoming, it’s up to a twelve year old to find a permanent state of self, it’s on a twelve year old to figure out the uncomfortableness of becoming a sexual being on their fucking own. Cause yknow if she’s wrong then people are going to use that as evidence that asexuality is a phase as if people looking for an excuse to dismiss other people’s identities would just not exist if we all perfectly performed our fucking labels like they’re the audience that decides if our fucking rock opera gets to hit broadway. Like there’s a fucking quota on how many times a person can be wrong about a label. I’m bisexual!! And if I’d just allowed myself to think that it’d be okay if I was wrong about being bisexual, or that it was okay if it wasn’t permanent, then I would’ve taken the first step to realizing I was actually a long term bisexual all the sooner.  There isn’t a fucking deadline for figuring out the perfect label for yourself, there isn’t a fucking surety purity test at the door. God, and all these trans kids and people agonizing about if they’re really trans or if they’re just faking it, as if that’s important when transitioning makes them happier! But no, we gotta make a philosophical argument from the ground up for what it means to be queer every fucking time so you don’t get it wrong cause god forbid, can you imagine
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stylesharrys · 24 days
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hot distraction [bisexual!y/n]
authors note: a little cheeky subby!y/n smut for you guys, had this idea in my drafts for months and months but i never really got round to writing it. anyway, here you go darlings, enjoy <3
warnings: dom/sub relationships, unprotected sex, kissing, teasing, swearing, spanking, dirty talk, anal (fingering)
word count: 2,862
summary: y/n breaks up with her girlfriend and harry helps take her mind off things.
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//
Harry has no idea what to do. He’s never seen her cry before and he doesn’t know if he should give her a hug or try to make light of the situation.
“I don’t even know why I’m crying.”
Harry’s even more confused than he was before. He’ll never ever understand women’s emotions. And by the sight before him, he doesn’t think he ever wants to.
“S’okay, petal. It hurts now but it’ll be a distant memory in a few weeks time.”
She scoffs at him, at his sorry attempt to cheer her up. Y/N doesn’t need or want pity. She wants to warn off all women and whore it up for a little bit.
If she’s honest, the breakup has been a long time coming. They’d only been together six months but things weren’t the same as when they first met.
Alora was a beautiful woman, funny and kind. But the first few times of fooling around were a lot more exciting than six months in, where her sex drive seemed to just vanish.
Y/N has thought that perhaps she was the problem. Maybe she craves sex too much and too often and that’s the issue. She also thought that maybe she secretly had a fear of commitment and that’s what made her more than okay with Alora calling things off.
She knows now that’s not the case. Alora was seeing other people behind Y/N’s back. Given, they never really spoke about being exclusive, but Y/N had just assumed that if Alora was seeing other people, she’d have the decency to let Y/N know.
And now, she’s about ready to swear off all women.
She stands from the sofa, wiping the tears from her face and taking a shaky breath. There’s no way in hell she’s going to ruin her Friday night sobbing over another woman. No fucking chance.
“Do you have plans tonight?” she asks Harry, chin raised as she acts unbothered by her situation.
Harry shakes his head. “No, why? You wanna go out?”
Her lip is taut between her teeth as she considers the proposition. A night out could be perfect – sex with a hot, random stranger will most definitely take her mind off things.
She nods, once. But it’s like Harry can smell the hesitation. He squints at her, leaning forward in his spot on the sofa.
“You’re not just wanting to go out so you can have a one night stand, are you?”
“No!” her voice is high-pitched, a dead giveaway that that’s exactly what she plans on doing.
Harry huffs, closing his eyes for a moment. It’s no secret that he’s got the hots for Y/N. He’s always found her incredibly attractive. But in the two years he’s known her, she’s only ever dated women.
He doesn’t think there’s ever even been an instance where she’s acknowledged another man. Harry notices her sheepish expression and his tummy knots and twists.
“If you were into guys…” he mumbles out, more to himself but it still reaches Y/N’s ears and she frowns.
“I am.”
Harry’s head snaps up, staring at her in bewilderment. “You are? I thought you were gay.”
Y/N laughs softly. “I am… slightly. I prefer men usually, but women are just softer and more attentive I find.”
Harry raises his eyebrows, a cocky smirk on his lips. Bingo.
“That just means you’ve never been with the right guys.”
His voice has grown deeper, sultry. And the entire mood of the room has changed. There’s a tension in the atmosphere, one they’re both awfully familiar with but never with one another.
“Is that so?”
They’re dancing on a tight rope between friends and something more, neither too sure who’s going to fall first. It feels naughty, wrong. So wrong to allow this tension, these thoughts.
But there’s nothing inappropriate about it. They’re both single, consenting adults. What would it matter if he kissed her? If she kissed him back? If he spent an hour between her legs and had her creaming all over his cock?
“And from what you’ve been telling me, wasn’t you getting frustrated that Alora was too vanilla?”
Heat rises to her cheeks at his words. Harry moves closer, tips of his fingers ghosting are her bare thighs, the hem of her baggy t-shirt barely covering her knickers underneath.
“Something tells me, you don’t want something soft. You’ve just never been manhandled the way you want, so you’re taking the easier route.”
Y/N has never felt so seen in her life. “Isn’t that right, pet?”
She grows shy under his words, feeling small and vulnerable and her little panties are fucking soaked.
“Maybe,” she squeaks.
Harry’s smirk grows tenfold, eyes dark and lustful. His gaze never leaves her face as he stands in front of her. His tall build towering over Y/N’s.
“Personally, I think you just want to be a good girl…”
His hand finds her face, gently caressing her jaw as he speaks. When her eyes flutter closed absentmindedly, she hears Harry tut before her.
“Keep those pretty eyes open, puppy.”
Her eyes open, wide. All doe-like and fluttery. It awakens that hunger deep in Harry’s stomach – one full of need and desire.
“Y/N… d’you like it when I call you puppy?”
She nods, so innocent and sheepish. It has Harry’s cock twitching in his pants. God, she’s going to be the death of him.
Y/N’s nuzzling her face into his hand, eyes heavy but open, like she doesn't want to be scolded by Harry. He pouts down at her, a look of sympathy in his eyes and Y/N’s never felt so warm and safe.
“My poor petal, all touch starved and needy.”
It’s like a flip has been switched within her. She’s no longer that bubbly and bratty girl he’s always known. She’s soft and quiet, desperate and eager to please and Harry is stretching out his boxers.
“Go in your bedroom for me, puppy. Want you naked with your legs spread.”
He places a gentle kiss to her lips, barely offering a taste of what’s to come. The act has her heart leaping before she rushes to her bedroom to rid herself of any clothes.
She’s never allowed herself to look at Harry in the way she is now. She always told herself that friends are only friends and never to indulge in anything else with them.
Y/N can admit that she’s always found him attractive, always enjoyed his company and mayb often stared a little too long whenever he was topless or when the veins in his arms and hands were that little bit more visible than usual.
She supposes he’s always had some sort of chokehold on her, something she’s never thought too deep about. But now, she can’t get out of her head. Laying naked on her bed, legs spread as he approaches her bedroom door.
She’s pulsing, cunt hot and leaking. God, she doesn't remember the last time she felt this turned on, this excited, this ready to submit completely.
Whatever he wants, she’ll give him. Whatever he offers, she’ll take.
Harry eyes her as he enters her bedroom, gaze focused on that weeping little cunt. He’s holding his breath, fighting back a wanton cry. He doesn’t think he’s ever seen anything so sexy in his life.
Y/N watches with glossy eyes as he tugs his t-shirt over his head, the ripples of his golden skin exciting her more. If he’ll let her, she’ll happily lick the expanse of every single tattoo adoring his body.
She’ll do anything. Anything.
Her hips begin to squirm as his thumbs loop into the waistband of his shorts and boxers, anticipation getting the better of her. Harry notices, pulls his hands away and raises a brow.
“I don’t remember saying you could move.”
Y/N’s body stills, blood running cold. Her lips are pursed into a thin line – “I’m sorry.” Her words come out shyly, like she’s embarrassed to be told off.
Harry tuts, no longer interested in pulling himself free. Instead he moves toward the foot of the bed and climbs up on his knees, sitting between her shaking thighs.
Y/N’s chest is heaving in excitement, bottom lip gnawed between her teeth. Harry reaches for her left thigh, gently massaging the soft and supple skin before raising his hand and dropping it again in a harsh smack.
She shrieks at the unexpected impact, brows knitted as she bites back a moan.
Oh, he wasn’t fucking around.
“If you’re sorry then you’ll lay on your tummy and take your punishment.” He flips her over before she has chance to register his words. Flat on her stomach, hands held behind her back, Harry takes her in.
He lets his hand caress her hips for a moment, trailing down to her bum and he smoothes over the skin. “And I don’t want to hear a fucking sound.”
He spanks her once, her entire body jolting. Y/N buries her face into her pillows, suffocating any desperate moans that beg to be cried. She keeps quiet, eyes rolled to the back of her head.
Harry spanks her again, harder this time. His hand print is left on her supple skin and he groans to himself. He spreads her cheeks apart for a moment, allows himself the sight of her dripping cunt, eagerly trying to clench around something.
“Look at you, puppy. So wet and good for me.”
Smack.
Smack.
Smack!
Her bottom is sore, stinging as he finally relents. There’s tears in her eyes as she struggles to compose her breathing. She’s not brave enough to admit she almost came from her punishment.
Harry takes a moment to admire his work, how raw her pretty bum is. Her skin is beginning to rise in the form of his handprint, sore and tender. He holds her hips, thumbs rubbing along the stripey lines of silvering stretch marks on the sides of her bum.
“Pretty puppy, did so well for me.”
She coos at his praise, fingers wiggling in an attempt to feel him. Harry chuckles, leaning down to pepper kisses to her bum and up her spine. He fools her with his kindness for a moment, allowing her body to relax under his touch.
But when his lips reach her neck, he grabs a handful of her hair and yanks her head up, teeth nipping at her jaw and nosing at her ear.
“Now you’re going to be a good puppy and let Daddy fuck your pretty little hole, okay?”
Y/N’s cunt throbs at his words. Daddy. Daddy. Daddy. Fuck, she can’t get it out of her head. Harry releases his hold on her hair, her face dropping back into her pillows as he clambers off her.
He strips from his boxers and shorts, thick length smacking at his lower tummy as he clambers back onto the bed again. Harry’s hard, painfully so and Y/N wants nothing more than to lay on her back and watch him work his way around her body.
But he doesn’t allow that. Instead, his hands find her hips and he’s hoisting her bum in the air, back arched and chest to the mattress with her face buried in the pillows.
The sight is mesmerising and Harry can’t look away. Pretty pussy all wet and plump. The tip of his cock slides through her slit and Harry lets out a shaky whimper. A noise that does not go unheard by Y/N, who’s jaw slacks at the sound of it.
She’s eager for more, gagging for his cock. She’s never felt so submissive in her life, so willing to be used as a fuck toy. And she never would’ve pegged Harry for the type.
Y/N supposes he does possess a lot of dominant qualities. Whenever he speaks, all eyes are on him. Whatever he says, it’s always respected. And when Harry doesn’t like something, nobody challenges him.
It’s been right in front of her the whole time. They’ve both been so blind.
“So pretty, baby. Look at you.”
The praise goes straight to her head. She’s woozy and needy and thinks she might fucking cry if he doesn’t fill her with his cook soon.
“Daddy’s good little puppy. Want me to fill your little hole, baby? Want Daddy to fuck you so hard you can’t even remember your name?”
Y/N’s too deep into subspace to respond, but that’s not a good enough excuse for Harry. He strikes down on her sore bum again and she shrieks, nodding feverishly.
“Yes, Daddy! Please, I’ve been so good.”
The sound of her begging is something Harry will never let himself forget. Her body responds to every tiny touch he offers, she keens for him. For more.
Lining himself at her hole, Harry pushes forward just enough to allow her half of his length. A wanton cry escapes her lips, muffled by her pillow as her body tenses.
Harry gives her little time to adjust to his length, sheathing himself further into her tight hole until he bottoms out.
Y/N struggles to stay quiet, struggles to not reach for him, to touch him. Harry reaches for her hands again, pulling them behind her back and holding her in place by her wrists.
“You’re fucking soaked, puppy.” He praises, breathless at the sight of himself tucked deep inside her.
Harry begins to rock his hips, slowly at first until he finds a comfortable pace and her ass jiggles with every thrust he gives. Y/N’s cunt grips him like a vice, obscene noises filling their ears and Harry decides he wants to hear more.
“Wanna hear you, puppy. Tell Daddy how good it feels.”
Y/N is wailing the second she’s given permission, wild and desperate and begging for more and more and more.
Harry’s thumbing at her puckering asshole, softly smoothing over the taut skin as Y/N begins to buck her hips back into him. He’s seething through gritted teeth, struggling to keep himself together as he gently pushes his thumb into her tight hole.
“Yes, Daddy! Please… please….”
She’s incoherent as she tries to speak, words still muffled and gurgled. She can feel him in her stomach, filling every inch of her body and subconscious mind. As if she exists solely for him, for his pleasure.
“My sweet girl, taking me so well. Look at you, puppy. All dumb for my cock.”
Harry’s thrusts get harder and faster, his thumb lodged deep in her ass as he fucks into her. Y/N’s arousal soaks his pubic bone, skin slapping and gruff moans echoing through.
She can’t stay quiet, not even if she tried. Moans are tearing throug her throat with no sense of hesitancy, her entire body being rocked as Harry pummels into her.
Eyes rolling to the back of her head, jaw slack, she’s close. Her cunt begins to tighten around him, desperate to mild him dry for everything he has to offer. And Harry can feel it – he feels every little squeeze she gives him, every spasm of her slick pussy.
His spare hand smacks down on her bum in quick, constant successions, his pace impossibly faster and the breath is knocked from her lungs.
She can’t see, can’t think, can’t hear. It’s like her soul has left; experiencing eternal bliss for the first time in her life. But she feels Harry’s fat cock twitch between her walls, she feels the stinging bite of every spank, she feels her coil begin to tighten and pull.
“You gonna cum, puppy? You gonna cum all over my cock?” Harry pants.
She’s nodding, unable to find her words. It takes her a moment to catch a breath. “Please,” is all she can manage to whimper out, her entire body on fire.
Harry spanks her again, eager and hot moans bubbling from his chest. “Cum, puppy. Make a mess on Daddy’s cock.”
Y/N’s entire body begins to tremble relentlessly, a high pitched whine falling off her tongue as she explodes around him.
Her arousal coates his cock and stomach, squirting out the best it can with Harry’s length still shoved in her cunt. The sight of her squirting all over him has him seeing stars, and he’s quick to pull out, coating her back and bum in thick ribbons of arousal.
“Jesus fucking Christ.”
He’s a panting mess as Y/N’s hips fall onto the mattress with a soft thud. He watches her body move gently as she catches her breath, listens to the soft pants that escape her plump lips.
Only now does he realise, he’s yet to kiss her the way he’s been dreaming. Harry crawls beside her, brushing the hair from her face and she’s quick to nuzzle into his touch.
He moves closer, his lips encapsulating hers in a soft and tender kiss. Both their eyes flutter closed and their mouths work in unison, gently. Y/N never knew she’d crave the taste of someones lips until Harry pulls away and rests his forehead against hers.
“Have a nap, puppy. You’ll need your energy for later.”
//
thank you for reading, i'd love to hear your guys' thoughts on this one 🥺
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ltleflrt · 28 days
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Figuring out I'm on the ace spectrum was so difficult because I have always been a horny bitch. I knew what sex was at a fairly young age, because I'd asked my mom and she's one of those good parents who'll answer questions like those, and as I grew older and would ask more complex questions, her answers would evolve along with my curiosity and understanding of the world. And I remember having fantasies as young as 9 or 10 years old, even if they were hella vague and nothing close to what sex actually is lol
So as I became a teenager, and all my friends' focus turned from playing with dolls to flirting with boys, I automatically thought I was attracted to boys. And I paid more attention to Cute Boys than I did to Cute Girls, because girls were just nice to look at while boys were People To Have Crushes On. Because of heteronormativity. Looking back on it now, I know there were girls I liked to stare at just as intently as boys, although less often because I wasn't trying to pay attention. And I certainly didn't fantasize about girls because I started reading romance novels in 5th grade, so I was fantasizing about male romantic partners because that was the fiction I was consuming. I didn't even realize fantasizing about girls was possible until I was 17, and I had a few "am I a lesbian" internal crises for years because of it.
So when I did start having sex, I had A LOT OF IT with SO MANY different guys, and eventually a couple of women once I started accepting that bisexuality was real. But it was never really fulfilling. Not like my fantasies were. Not like my books were. I was slutty because sex was fun, I was horny, there were plenty of options so I kept searching for that satisfaction I was craving.
Getting married was a relief (even though it turns out I'm aro-spec too lol) because I was tired of hunting, and even if sex with my husband was meh, at least I had someone around to scratch that itch if I had it, and he didn't mind if I occasionally took care of things on my own because I'd read an especially hot scene in a romance.
I learned about asexuality in my early 20s, but I brushed it off. Couldn't be me, I'm far too horny for that. But I think that comes from the fact that everything you hear about Aces is attached to sex-repulsion or sex-indifference. I wasn't either of those things. I was horny all the dang time. I was fantasizing about sex all the dang time. I figured actual sex was meh because my imagination was so vivid that real life could never match up. Which could be true to an extent, but I think not as much as popular opinion would have us believe. If fantasy was really that much better for everyone, then I think we'd have less incels and unplanned pregnancies than we do.
In my 30s I finally saw people talking about The Spectrum, and I started examining my past, and I figured out I wasn't really attracted to anyone I had sex with. I do occasionally find someone attractive; there are men and women and enbies who make my skin feel tight and give me a little wave of lightheadedness lol... but it's always always the fantasy that gets me really going. If given the opportunity I wouldn't have sex with any of those people. Thank you, but no thank you, I'd rather just imagine it than physically participate in the act with them.
(Ok I might go down on them, but that's less about wanting sex, and more about being able to add them to my Tally. Hell yeah I want to brag about making *insert hot person* have an orgasm. There's PRIDE in that kind of accomplishment lol)
I have a lot of respect for aces that are not horny. I understand it even if I don't share the sentiment. And I feel like most of them understand me even if they don't share the sentiment. There's a solidarity between us.
Until I go into a fandom tag for a character that the aces have glommed onto because they're canonically ace or headcanoned as ace. Good lord, the non-horny aces can turn into downright vicious bastards if a horny ace sexualizes their blorbo.
This post is for them.
Horny aces exist. Please look up "autochorissexual, lithosexual, and aegosexual."
Refer to those definitions in regards to romantic attraction as well as sexual attraction.
Some aces may not fall into one of those definitions, because asexuality is a spectrum, but they may still be horny.
Horny aces are not disrespecting you by enjoying being horny on main. We promise we'll wash the stickiness off our hands before we hold your hands in queer solidarity.
And most importantly: Your blorbo is fictional and does not need to be defended from icky sexuality. They exist in an infinite multiverse, so your blorbo and my blorbo are not the same, even if they appear to be on the surface.
AND:
This post is also for the people who are confused about themselves because they're horny but don't actually feel attraction. You're not crazy, you're not wishy washy, you're not "waiting for the right person to come along" (unless you are, in which case I hope you find them). You're just a thin strip of color on a massive rainbow that holds more unique shades than anyone can perceive at a glance.
You're valid. You're one of us too.
And don't be mean to the non-horny aces. Tag your smut so they can avoid it. (But actually so I can find it lol)
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rogueddie · 9 months
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Change / Gloom
It's not hard to figure out that Eddie is gay- or bisexual? Steve isn't sure. All he knows, undoubtedly, is that Eddie Munson likes men.
The rumors from high school definitely do a lot of the heavy lifting in regards to Steves revelation. But he knows what it looks like when people are attracted to him. He knows exactly what it looks like when people try to hide that they're attracted to him.
His first test was simple; stretch. The bottom of his polo always rides up and, as expected, Eddies eyes lingered on the slither of skin on display.
A simple test. An easy one.
The second test is not so easy- it requires Robins help and she's not the most subtle. Luckily, she's as keen as he is on getting him a boyfriend (specifically, an Eddie-shaped boyfriend), so she puts in as much effort as she can at being convincing.
Eddie admitted to her that, yeah, Steve is attractive. That he also finds Steve attractive. And not in a straight way!
("What the hell does that even mean?" Robin had asked, when Steve insisted that she needs to clarify that. "If he's attracted to you, it can't be straight!"
"It totally can," Steve tutted. "Tommy was attracted to loads of guys in a straight way."
"I'm going to ignore that because we don't have time to unpack any of that-")
He hadn't expected Robin to be so convincing, or for Eddie to be so open yet. It ruins his very thought out plan in the best way- he only needs to confirm if it's more than just physical attraction now, and that's the easy part.
"You're late," Steve greets. He leans his hip against the doorway, crossing his arms.
Eddie rolls his eyes. "So sorry, princess. You gonna let me in?"
"Say please."
"Please." He shifts, trying to look annoyed, putting his hands on his hips. The hall light illuminates his face too well for Steve to miss the slight blush.
Steve steps back, beckoning him as dramatically as he can manage without feeling like an idiot.
"Eddie!" Dustin calls, waving him over to the couch.
Robin already helped Steve make it so there's only two spots left open... Eddie, like they'd hoped, choses the corner so he can lean over to talk to the kids.
Once he's checked the door is definitely locked, peeking into the kitchen to make sure the back door is also shut, he plops down on the sofa. He shifts, stretching his legs out so his thigh is pressed up against Eddies.
It's not until the movie starts that Eddie leans over and whispers; "what are you doing?"
Steve quietly hums, raising an eyebrow.
Eddie gently kicks his ankle. "That. And at the door."
"I can't be friendly?" Steve whispers, with a teasing little smirk- it always used to have girls stuttering.
"Not like this," Eddie hisses. "Back off."
"What? I was just-"
"I know. I'm telling you to stop."
Steve slowly pulls back so they aren't touching as much- where they're sat doesn't leave much space.
He feels unmoored. He's never felt so wrong about his chances- even at Scoops Ahoy, despite his attempts, he knew he was probably going to get rejected. He's not sure he has ever been so off.
"I'm getting some popcorn," Eddie says quietly, towards the mid-point of the movie.
"I'll help," Steve quickly offers, jumping to his feet before Eddie can turn his offer down.
"Hey," Robin pipes up, grabbing his arm and giving him a light squeeze- reassurance, comfort. "Make me that ice cream shake I like."
"Understood," Steve nods, giving her a lazy salute.
It takes a good few minutes to make, giving the two of them more time alone in the kitchen.
She's giving him the green light.
"Sorry about that," Steve says quietly, once they're in the kitchen. "Didn't mean to come on too strong. Or, like, if it's too public. I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable."
He doesn't say anything for a long moment. He keeps his back turned to him, waiting in front of the microwave, shoulders hunched to his ears.
Steve isn't sure whether he should say anything else. He looks uncomfortable. Steve isn't sure if speaking up would make it worse or-
"Who told you?" He eventually asks. He finally turns around, expressions dangerously blank. "Was it Gareth?"
"What?"
"He probably meant well," he ponders. His smile doesn't reach his eyes- it makes something uncomfortable squirm in Steves stomach. "He never did have the displeasure of meeting King Steve."
"Eddie-"
"It's ok though, right? You didn't mean to make me uncomfortable."
"What the fuck are you talking about, man? Are you mad that I, like... know? Is that it?"
"Is that it?" Eddie repeats, mockingly. "No, Harrington. I don't care that you know- most people guessed it, what's one more? No, I care that you're making fun of me."
"I'm not making fun of you."
"Really? Could've fooled me."
He turns back to the microwave- it dings, but Eddie stays there, pretending to be busy.
Waiting for Steve to leave.
"I'm not making fun of you," Steve tries again, hating how wobbly his voice sounds. "I was- I mean, I thought maybe, you, um... but if not, that- that's ok, I can, like... fuck."
Eddie slowly turns, frowning, looking slightly more concerned- but the suspicion still lingers. "Spit it out."
"I thought you might like me but I don't know if it's just physical so I thought I'd try and flirt as a way of testing the waters before actually trying to ask you out," Steve rushes out in one breath.
"You were... actually flirting?" Eddie blinks at him, slowly. "Seriously? Not a joke? But... what? I thought you were straight?"
"So did I," Steve shrugs, scratching the back of his neck. "Never really, um... thought about romancing a guy before."
"Before..?"
"Before you."
"Holy shit." Eddie goes to pinch himself- stopping at the last second with a shake of his head. "If I'm dreaming, don't wake me up."
"This is your idea of a good dream?"
"You know damn well it is, you little brat." Eddie laughs, shaking his head again, in disbelief. "I've fucked this up a bit, huh? Can we start again?"
"Oh. yeah, sure, of course, uh-"
"Wait, no, I don't have the patience for that," he quickly darts around the kitchen table, grabbing Steves waist and pulling him close. "This alright? Not gonna say psych?"
"If you don't kiss me right now, I just might."
"Say please."
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posi-pan · 9 months
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wayne brady is pansexual!!! 💗💛💙🥳
i’m pansexual. in doing my research, both with myself and just with the world, i couldn’t say if i was bisexual, because i had to really see what that was, especially because i really have not gotten a chance to act on anything. so, i came to pansexual because — and i know that i’m completely messing up the dictionary meaning — but to me, pan means being able to be attracted to anyone who identifies as gay, straight, bi, transsexual or non-binary. being able to be attracted across the board. and, i think, at least for me for right now, that is the proper place. i took pan to mean that not only can i be attracted to any of these people or types physically, but i could be attracted to the person that is there. i’ve dealt with the shame. a shame cake, just eating it every single day — and then worried about… people finding out. i’ve always had a wonderful community of friends who are in the lgbtq+ community, people that i’ve grown up with in shows, gays and lesbians, and, later in life, my trans relatives and my niece. i’ve always had that community, but i've always felt like a sham because i wasn’t being forthcoming with myself. i could speak out about black issues because i can’t hide that. and you can play at being an ally, but until the day that you can truly say, “this is who i am, and i wanna stand next to you,” that's not… i always wanted that day to come. i’ve told myself in the past, also, nobody needs to know my personal business. the world can absolutely go without knowing that wayne identifies as pan. but that gave me license to still live in the shadows and to be secretive. what does that feel like to actually not be shameful, to not feel like, “oh, i can’t be part of this conversation because i’m lying?” i had to break that behavior. i’m now trying to be the most wayne brady i can be. i don’t know about most, actually. i’m still coming together. but if i’m healthy, then i can go onstage at let’s make a deal and be the best wayne brady that everybody wants and expects. i can be the best dad that maile needs. i can be the best friend to mandie, the best son to my mother, and one day, the best partner to someone, because i’m doing this for me. not dating yet though! [laughs] i am single, but it’s not about being with someone right now. i’ve got some work to do still. then, wayne as a single, open-minded pansexual can make a decision and be free and open to other people.
i included more quotes from the article than just strictly pan related because it’s quite touching. good for him!!!! 🌈👏🥰
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elvensorceress · 18 days
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idk I get incredibly angry at homophobes being cast on my gay shows. anybody want the start of my fic where Eddie dumps her bigoted ass and then has a gay ole sexy time with his husband and his husband's new boyfriend? because here. you can have. it's cathartic 💕
test drive - 2K, BuckTommy, BuckEddieTommy, Buddie endgame forever / Explicit
The restaurant is dimly lit in a way that might be classy and romantic, but Tommy’s hand is also on Buck’s thigh. And he’s having a lot of very not-classy, not even very romantic sorts of thoughts. Everything is far more along the lines of, he could put his hand on my dick, and I know what his cock feels like down my throat, and why are we here in a public place when we could be back at my loft taking turns fucking each other until we’re both a mess of cum and lube and sweat and sexy bruises and love bites? Because all of that is way more appealing than what they are sitting here, waiting to do. 
If it were just one of their dates, it’d be great. Those are fantastic. Tommy likes to pick him up and take him to nice places and he smiles in a really, really soft cute way that also has an air of, I am going to fuck you until you scream and you will love every second. And holy fucking god, does Buck love every second. 
Bisexuality, man. Who knew? 
It’s so fantastic. It’s so different? Or maybe it’s just that Tommy is different because he’s ridiculously cool and hot and Buck always really liked when someone knew what they wanted and would take the lead and he could do everything in his power to please them and make them feel good. Confidence is infinitely sexy and competence even more so. And Tommy has all of that in spades. 
And Buck loves men. Buck really loves men. It makes so much sense and how had he never even considered? Maybe he considered but he sure as hell never realized wanting a man and being attracted to a man was something that fit so well. Fuck, it fits so well. 
Maybe he could even end up with a man someday? Maybe he could marry a man and have a relationship that is like this all the time for the rest of his life? Not that he doesn’t like women still. Women are great. People who don’t identify as either or they identify as both or however they choose— they’re great, too. 
Everyone is hot and Evan Buckley is very bisexual, and it just might be one of the greatest revelations he’s ever had. 
He’s just really, really enjoying being with a man right now. 
He is not, however, enjoying the thought of this dinner. Everything about this dinner makes his stomach a washing machine of anxiety. For no reason. He doesn’t know why. There’s nothing wrong with it. 
Why wouldn’t he and his boyfriend go on a double date with his best friend who is their mutual friend, and his best friend’s girlfriend. What is wrong with that? It’s fine. Should be— fun? 
Shouldn’t be a bad taste in his mouth that the wine still hasn’t gotten rid of and roiling in his stomach that is really killing his appetite. But it very much is. 
Tommy squeezes Buck’s thigh and rubs it in a way that surely is supposed to be comforting. But it makes Buck want to drag him out of this restaurant and back to the loft where he can show Tommy how good he is at fucking him now. Not just because it would be a thousand times better than the prospect of this dinner. The bar is so low on the ground, it’s buried at this point. But also because sex with his new boyfriend is better than— actually, Buck is having a hard time thinking of anything that is better right now. 
Very hard time. 
They’ve been practicing. Everything. Blowjobs, fucking, fingering, ball massages, prostate milking, rimming— all sorts of really fun things Buck never even imagined could feel so good. Not that he was oblivious to a lot of it. He has toys. His ex was into pegging. Buck might have been unaware of how intense and gay— well, bi. He’s bi now. Buck is bi now. Probably always was but he knows it now. He’s bisexual.— his attraction to men could be. But he was not unaware of sexual acts that feel good to his body. 
But it’s totally different with a real man and a real cock and being manhandled by someone who might actually be bigger and stronger than you is really fucking hot. 
He checks his watch again and it’s already 7:28. They’re almost half an hour late. Which is so not like Eddie. He’s not sure if Marisol is like that but he knows for sure Eddie is either fifteen minutes early for everything or he texts if there is a problem. Even then, he’s only ever a few minutes late. If that. And last Buck checked, there were no new messages on his phone. 
He checks again, and still nothing. Not even to Buck’s message of, hey u ok? u on the way? He frowns and sets his phone back on the table and turns to Tommy. “How long before I’m allowed to be really worried?”
Tommy gives him an amused smile. “You can be worried.”
“How long before we need to bother Athena? Ten more minutes? Five? Sh-should I bother Athena now?”
Tommy’s eyebrows scrunch and he looks at Buck like he’s crazy. Okay, it’s probably crazy. Just. He’s worried? That must be the churning in his stomach. “I’m sure Eddie’s fine. It hasn’t been that long. And he’s Eddie.”
Yeah. Yeah, he’s Eddie. But Eddie was also shot downtown in the middle of broad daylight and nearly bled out all over, and there’s not much anyone can do even if they are trained in hand to hand combat and self-defense and those kinds of things. Not many ways to defend against a sniper round that shouldn’t even be a thing. 
Not that Buck is thinking about that. Ever. 
He’s just turning into a washing machine over this dinner. That’s all. 
Five minutes later, some of it finally eases when Eddie finally shows up and sits down across from them. Alone. 
Alone?
“Sorry, guys,” Eddie runs a hand through his hair and breathes like he’s run a hundred miles. He’s hardly been looking distressed at all lately. He’s been glowing smiles and pretty laughs. Not pretty. Nice? Good? Good that he’s so much happier and at peace. 
But he’s not that now. 
“I would’ve—” Eddie checks his own watch, one that was a Christmas present that Buck had engraved with, all the time you need, and must realize how late he actually is. “Fuck. Sorry. Really sorry. I’ll buy? Unless you’ve already eaten and paid and are about to leave.” 
Tommy shakes his head and has that nice smile that’s so reassuring. “We haven’t. Don’t worry about it.”
“We were waiting,” Buck adds and itches to ask him what’s wrong, why he’s late, why he looks— like he isn’t okay. 
“Great.” Eddie nods tersely and it sounds anything but great. “They got anything stronger than wine and cocktails here? Because—” He doesn’t say. But he does make a face the conveys everything. 
“Doubt it,” Tommy says. “But we can get something somewhere else. Is Mar— Mari?”
“Marisol,” Buck supplies. Not that it matters. Not that he cares. Is he supposed to care? There’s nothing wrong with her. She’s fine. 
“Right,” Tommy says, which should say everything. Eddie’s been hanging out with Tommy for months, Buck’s been with Tommy for months, and Tommy is pretty damn good at remembering people’s names. “Marisol. Is she still on the way?”
Eddie’s jaw gets very tight. “No. We’re done.” 
Tommy looks at Buck and Buck looks at Tommy. They’re done? They broke up? Not that it’s particularly surprising. Part of the curse of dating someone you met on a call. Gotta be. Also the whole thing where Eddie has some kind of commitment issues or something because as soon as he gets a girlfriend, he has to spend all his time doing anything besides being with said girlfriend.
“So, drinking?” Tommy says. 
Buck pushes his wine glass across the table. They usually share when they eat together. Drinks, food, anything. And he’s happy to offer it to the cause. 
“Yes, drinking.” Eddie takes Buck’s wine and downs all of it. 
Eddie’s single again. Marisol isn’t coming to dinner and she’s not part of their lives any longer. Not that Buck has a problem with her. She’s fine. She was nothing really. That wasn’t going to last. Eddie likes the idea of being with someone. So he says. He’s allergic to actually having a relationship for some reason. 
The washing machine in Buck’s stomach disappears though. Which is so much better. Now, it’s just Buck hanging out with his best friend and his boyfriend. 
Maybe there’s a little washing machine. It’s nothing though. 
They order food and drinks, and Eddie only goes through a couple shots and three glasses of wine and one beer. But he eats and also drinks water and doesn’t seem inebriated at all. So, they focus on the meal and Tommy’s latest work stories of helicopter rescues. 
It’s not until after Buck discreetly hands their waiter his credit card before they’re actually brought the bill, that Eddie actually starts talking.
“I kind of fucked up. Didn’t mean to. I owe you an apology,” he says and looks at Buck with worlds of regret and sorrow. 
Whatever it is, Buck forgives him. He’s sure he’s done far worse than whatever it is. “Why? What, uh, what happened?”
Eddie doesn’t look at him. Or Tommy. He does shake his head but not like he’s saying no. More like he’s disgusted. “I let it slip that you two are— that you’re. Dating. Together. Boyfriends? Do you call each other that? Are you boyf— never mind, I let it slip. I’m sorry. That was my bad. Not my secret to tell.”
Tommy looks scrunched and confused again and Buck— he doesn’t understand what the problem is? No, he hasn’t told many people yet. But it’s not a secret that he and Tommy are together. 
“Eds,” Buck says and immediately thinks he probably shouldn’t have called him that. He doesn’t know why. But he shouldn’t. “It’s fine. I’m not— It’s not a secret. I’m not hiding. Or— or in the closet? I’m out. Now. I’m bi and—” And he’s really happy about that. He really loves it. He’s bisexual. He loves women and men and whoever regardless of gender. And holy shit, does he love men right now. He really, really loves being with a man. He looks to his side and grins brightly at Tommy. “And I’m not ashamed or embarrassed that Tommy and I are together.”
There’s a cute half smile that curves the side of Tommy’s mouth and Buck so wants to kiss him. And do all sorts of other things with him. 
“Well. Good.” Eddie taps his finger on an empty shot glass like he’s contemplating ordering another. “Still. Didn’t go well. Didn’t mean to out you like that.”
“Didn’t go well?” Tommy asks. “Saying that Evan and I are dating didn’t go well?”
Eddie purses his lips and does a slow, exaggerated shake of his head. “Nope. But at least I learned that now. Has the waiter brought our check yet? Because I’m just going to drink more if I don’t head out soon. Not that I’m sad about her or anything. I’m pissed. You think you know someone, and no. No, she’s a raging homophobe.”
She— oh. Oh, that’s what happened. “She broke up with you because we’re gay? Bi and gay? Or— you know what I mean.” Is Tommy gay? Or bi? Or something else? Buck hasn’t actually asked what label he uses. How he qualifies his sexuality. He felt weird asking. It’s so personal. Is he supposed to ask? All he knows is that Tommy was into him. Tommy kissed him and it was breathtaking, incredible, magnificent and changed Buck’s whole life. He didn’t really think anything beyond that. Couldn’t really think beyond that. 
Eddie definitively points at himself and then at phantom nothingness. “I dumped her. Because I said this was a double date with you guys and she said, well not really, and I said, no really. It’s a double date. Her and me and both of you. Double date. Except not her. Ever. Anymore. Because she had to go off about how it was wrong and made her uncomfortable and I ‘let both of you be alone with Christopher?’ And it couldn’t possibly be a date like me and her would go on a date because she’s a woman and I’m a man and that was normal. But you two are both men. Both muscular, powerful, masculine, manly firemen type men— so it could never be the same especially because neither one of you are flamey or girly or whatever, so it could never work, the two of you since neither one of you is ‘The Girl.’ Which is all bullshit. By the way. Obviously. And,” he finally stops and breathes, and there’s a hard swallow in his throat and his eyes are distant and his whole body is strung tight and if he could breathe fire? He probably would. Holy shit, he’s pissed off. Buck isn’t even sure he’s ever seen Eddie this angry at anyone who hasn’t hurt someone he loves. 
Although. Technically she did? Not hurt per se, Buck doesn’t give a shit about what she thinks of him. But she was insulting them. So. Yeah, okay, of course fiercely protective Eddie would be angry. 
“And anyway,” Eddie says, still never quite looking at Buck or even at Tommy. Never quite focusing on them. “That’s how I’m single and back on the market again.” He smiles a wide, bitter, snarky kind of smile, and steals the half-full beer glass in front of Buck and downs it in one gulp. 
(Read on AO3)
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lenaaxxo · 4 months
Text
best i ever had
Anon request:
Paige seeing her ex at a party and getting jellllyyyyyyyyyy.
Pairing: Paige Bueckers x fem reader
Warnings: drinking, cussing, partying, angst
Authors Note: The reader is bisexual, Paige is unlabeled, and this is my first fic so please bear with me.
Word count: 1.4k
It was a Friday night in Storrs, Connecticut. My friend, Madi wanted me to go out with her to our local bar, Ted’s. I didn't feel like partying since my ex-girlfriend broke up with me a week ago. She said she couldn't balance school, work, basketball, and our relationship. I thought that was absolute crap because there are so many pro athletes doing exactly that, but there was nothing I could do about it anymore. 
“Come on y/n, don't be a loser and cry over her for the rest of the night,” Madi begged while attempting to drag me out of bed. 
“Okay rude, plus I wouldn't be a loser for crying over her. I mean we were together for almost 2 years,” 
“Okay, I'm sorry. How about we just go to the bar and drink? We won't even have to dance, plus I'll let you borrow something of mine in case someone wants to flirt with you tonight.”
When she first came into my room I was half convinced to go out but once she mentioned drinking and partying I was all in. The whole school knew of my and Paige's relationship so I knew someone there would tell her they saw me at the bar. And the idea of flirting with someone else seemed like good practice for later. 
As we walked up the doors of the bar Madi and I could hear the music blaring from the inside outside. I almost reached for my phone to text Paige that they were playing her favorite song, Best I Ever Had by Drake, but remembered our current situation and resisted. Inside the bar, it was super busy. Exams had just finished so everyone was drinking and dancing with their friends before Christmas break.
Madi and I walk up to some empty seats at the bar and I order a dirty Shirley, she gets a Mojito and we order 2 shots each. The first few moments of being in a bar are the absolute worst. You're so sober you don't want to be there with all the loud music and the sticky tables, but after about 2 or 3 drinks everything’s perfect and you never want to leave. That's how I'm currently feeling now. The revealing shirt I'm wearing paired with my tight skirt makes me feel like prey to everyone's eyes. 
“Okay, I'm gonna go dance. Don't miss me too much” Madi said after taking her shots. She usually sees a guy she finds attractive and goes up to them asking to dance. I loved how confident she was, she was always the one who went up to guys and by the end of the night, they were all over her. 
While sipping on my drink, I look around the bar. I noticed a few people from my classes and some athletes from the men's swim and basketball teams. And to my happiness, I saw most of the girls from the women's basketball team including Paige. She was wearing a blue cropped tank top paired with some black cargo pants. The sight of her abs between the cut-off of her top and the waistline of her pants got me to chug the rest of my drink and order another. It was about 3 minutes of sipping my second Shirley before someone sat beside me. 
“Hey,” I heard him say. “You wanna dance?” As I turned, I saw the most gorgeous guy this campus had to offer. He was tall with dirty blond hair and blue eyes. 
“Yeah, I'm down.” As we walked to the dance floor, I could feel eyes on me. I knew I'd get looks with this outfit on so it didn't bother me that much. Especially after 2 drinks and 2 shots. 
“So, what's your name?” It was loud in the middle of the dance floor. Around the bar was much quieter, so he was almost yelling out his question to me.
“Y/n. What's yours?”
“Zach,” He had a cute name, I thought. I mean at least it wasn't something like Reginald or whatever. 
As we danced, the feeling of being watched never left. It honestly felt like someone's eyes were burning into the back of my head so I looked around. The only eyes I made contact with were Paige’s and her gaze was murderous. I could tell she was jealous just by the way her eyebrows were pulled down, so I decided to mess with her. 
I turned so that my ass was on Zach's lap and I began grinding on him while maintaining eye contact with Paige. As his hands made way to my hips I held onto them as he guided me to the song playing through the speakers. That was enough to get Paige and I knew it. I wasn't much on physical touch so me holding onto hands pissed her off more than anything. As she started to walk over to us I turned around and wrapped my send around his neck before I felt her firm grip on my upper arm. I quickly said bye to Zach as Paige brought me outside the bar.
“What the fuck was that? You're out here dancing with guys that basically look like me?” She yelled as she cornered me against the wall. She was so hot when she was mad. Her jaw clenched, and she held intense eye contact.
“Wow, your ego’s so big you think he looks like you, Paige?” 
“Don't make this into an ego thing y/n, he and I are literally the same height and we both have blond hair and blue eyes.” As she spoke, her arms moved with her, she pointed to the door of the bar while speaking about Zach.
“Fine then! Maybe he did remind me of you. But you don't get to badmouth me or be angry at all because you’re the one who broke it off after almost 2 years! Two fucking years of ups and downs P. I was there with you through your whole ACL recovery and each time you cried, I held you close to me, not anyone else,” at this point, I was crying and screaming at her. I was so hurt and drunk that the words just kept spilling out. 
“You said you couldn't handle us and you left. You fucking left me. So I'm trying to move on. I’m trying so fucking hard but I honestly don't think I can ever fully get over you. I don't want to get over you. I don’t want to be with anyone else but you. You're the only one I can truly be myself around. Not even Madi makes me feel as safe and understood as you do,” She stood there in silence for a while. I could see the tears brimming in her eyes before she spoke.
“Let's get you home” I was so exhausted that I agreed to let her take me home. I could tell by her body language that she hadn't drunk tonight and her car in the parking lot of the bar confirmed it. She never lets anyone drive her car unless she absolutely has to, so it being back there meant she was one of the designated drivers for the night. 
“Can you text Madi and tell her that I’m leaving?”
“I will once I get you home.”
Entering my apartment wasn't much of a struggle. I walked straight into my bathroom to take my makeup off as Paige went into my room. 
“Here I got you something to change into” Her voice was soft. I could tell she didn't want to hurt me anymore than she already had that night. 
“Thank you,” I couldn't find it in me to say anything else to her.
“I have to go back for the girls”
“I realized that, but could you stay till I fall asleep?”
“Yeah, of course,”
Getting into bed with Paige again felt euphoric. This past week I never thought It would ever happen again. Just knowing that you were falling asleep in the arms of someone you trusted with your life was something I thought I had lost forever. The longer I held onto her and breathed in her perfume, the more tired I got. 
“I'm so sorry, my love. You were the best I ever had, but everything's just too much right now,” I heard her say, right before I fell asleep.
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chiocchi · 4 months
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If you don't mind answering, why do you ship Tom Riddle and Harry Potter? Besides the whole issue that they are enemies, and the age difference, both characters are heterosexual. It's canonical fact. If it's the dynamic you like... Have you thought about Tomione's ship? They have a lot of potential together. And in the right direction, they would be a couple that could make it in the books.
JDKLJKLFJSDLKFJA This kinda feels like people knocking on your door and trying to get you to believe in their religion. It's pretty funny.
I don't know why are you calling issues to a part of the pairing's appeal lkajdsjfs (And Hermione is Harry's age and they are on the same side too?). And not sure about that canonical fact. Harry can be read as bisexual quite easily and Voldemort|Tom... idk he seems more obsessed with power, immortality, and Harry. But even if that's the case, I don't see why it should matter. We're in fandom after all.
I don't know if I'll be able to convey why I like this ship so much. For starters, I'm really into the unique connection they share. There was a piece of Voldemort's soul inside Harry's; they had a mental link; a whole language they're the only ones to speak (for the most part); Voldemort chose him and marked him; and there's even a prophecy that linked them together. There aren't two people more connected than them. They're soulmates, and the fact that Voldemort didn't intend it and Harry hates it adds another layer of complexity.
But not only that, they're like a broken reflection of each other, which I find fascinating. In his second year, Harry was worried about the similarities between them. Both half-bloods, orphans, raised by Muggles, they both considered Hogwarts their first real home. I feel like they would have really understood each other in other circumstances. They would have been friends. Because one of their key differences is that Harry found friends and adults that loved him while Tom was probably bullied and, y'know, the whole Dumbledore thing.
Not to mention that Harry would die for everyone whereas Tom would kill everyone. They're insane in their own way. I love their similarities and differences, but more than anything else, I love when they're together. The fanfics and fanarts are awesome.
And the whole thing of being enemies feels quite gay sometimes klafjdlskfja. Harry can't help but think Tom is handsome and, despite everything Voldemort did, Harry wanted to give him one last chance to show remorse. I have no doubt Harry is crazy enough to actually forgive him.
I've thought about Tomione and I've come to the conclusion that I don't like it. pinktom has a really good post about it and I agree with it. Besides, Hermione liked Ron and had something with Krum, and they're nothing like Tom. Just because she's heterosexual doesn't mean she's attracted to any man, y'know? klajdlfkdjs I don't think they would have been a couple in the books, no matter the direction. If it's the dynamic you like, have you thought about Tomarry? More believable, more intense, and a wider range of wholesomeness to fucked up in the fics. It's really interesting. Unless you don't like men being together? Hmm? Suspicious (just kidding. To each their own. So no need to go to other people's asks to try to change their minds :kek:).
Also Harry is my favorite character and he's not replaceable. I kinda don't care about any other character tbh. Thank you for coming to my Ted talk.
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