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simkhira · 4 years

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I Have 300+ Gameplay Mods?! & Yes, They All Work Together...

Yes, you read that correctly. I have over 300 gameplay mods / overrides in my game. 340 to be exact. & Yes, they all work just fine together. By that I mean hardly any last exceptions / errors. So if you are looking for ways to spice up your game - here you go, sis:

⭐ = my ultimate faves

PLEASE SEE ALL 300+ LINKS ON YOUR MOBILE DEVICE! desktop tumblr won’t let us be great.

BIG DISCLAIMER: Use these mods at your own risk! Just because all 300+ of these mods work for me, does not mean they will work for you. ALSO - when patch day comes, do not refer to this list for the most up-to-date versions of mods… I will only be updating this list when I feel like I need to.

O K A Y

let’s start with... the basics:

MC Command Center ⭐

UI Cheats Extension ⭐

More Columns in CAS ⭐

No Mosaic ⭐

CAS Background

CAS Blob Remover

CAS Immersive Lighting

CAS Tidy Accessories + Details

New Loading Screens

Cube Map Remover ⭐

Into the Light (Lighting Mod)

Out of the Dark (Lighting Mod)

Twinkle Toes (Lighting Mod)

No Fade on Sims and Objects

Build/Buy Camera (Tab Mode) ⭐

Lot Trait Effects Hider

Smaller Plumbob ⭐

& then you need... realistic socialization:

Chat Pack ⭐

Whim Overhaul ⭐

Meaningful Stories ⭐

Personality Please

Better Elders

More Face to Face Conversation

Call Over Sims (Higher Distance)

Call Anytime + Chat Longer on the Phone

Unlisted Phone Numbers ⭐

Low Fun is Boring

Family Matters (Share Big News with Family Members)

Share More News ⭐

Congratulate More

Ask What Happened More

Conversation Tweaks

Chat Standing Still

No Stand Up to Greet

No Rude Intro Animation

No Flirty Animation

Apology Fix (Don’t Apologize if Your’re the Victim)

Angry Walk-style Only When VERY Angry

Less Intrusive Conversations

NPC’s Get Out of My Convo

Autonomous Parenthood Social Interactions

Autonomous Social Interactions

Reduced Idle Chatting

Know Your Coworkers / Classmates ⭐

More Away Actions

More Social Activities

Spend Weekend With

Teach Me the Rumbaism

now let’s talk about... realistic romance:

Chemistry System ⭐

Pillow Talk After Woohoo ⭐

No Shy First Kiss

No Woohoo Dance

Shower Woohoo Tweaks

No Romance for Family

Restricted Romance Interactions

Less Jealousy

Simda Dating App

Can I Come Over?

Date Night Event

Movie Night Event

Set Family Relationships ⭐

Set Extended Family Relationships ⭐

Bathroom Privacy Tweak

Bridal Shower Event

Bachelor(ette) Party Event

Auto Engagement / Wedding Ring ⭐

Vacation Weddings

Sit at Weddings

Better Wedding Presents ⭐

Honeymoon Event

Buy More Gifts from Phone

Ask for Romantic Massage

Realistic Divorce ⭐

Traumatic Divorce for Children

Improved Relationships

No Restaurant Bill When Invited ⭐

Faster Cooking at Restaurants ⭐

Better Food Quality at Restaurants

Finish Eating in Restaurants

Restaurant Guests Overhaul

Restaurant Sit Tweak

(can y’all tell that restaurants annoy me? lmao)

first comes love, then comes... pregnancy / toddler / kids / fur babies:

Ages Behavior Tweaks

Toddlers Spawn at Parks (with Parents)

More Children at Beaches

Pregnancy Overhaul

Rub Your Baby Bump (Small Pregnancy Overhaul)

Determine Baby’s Gender for All ⭐

Ultrasound Scans ⭐

Baby Shower Event

Amazing Birth (Rave About Your Delivery)

Advanced Birth Certificate ⭐

Sibling Care Tweaks

Make Less / Clean Less Mess

Auto Brush Teeth After Puking

Auto Put Activity Crafts into Inventory

Allow Toddlers to go to Services

No Call Out of High Chair

Toddler Power Nap

Better Toddler Milk

Better + Younger Nanny

Call a Babysitter ⭐

Call a Dog Walker

Shorter Dog Walks

Dog Walkers in Other Worlds

Scold All Pets

Sell Grown Up Pets

Pet Food Serving Overhaul

More Efficient Pet Brushing

Kids Can Walk Dogs

Kids Can Order Espresso

Kids Can Ride Bikes

Kids Have More Phone Interactions

Kids Can Cook

Kids Can Do Retail

Kids Can Garden

Kids Can Make Flower Arrangements

Kids Can Make Robots

Kids Can Workout

Kids Can Do Spa Activities

Kids Can Play Guitars

Kids Can Play Ping Pong

Birthday Anytime

Let Friends Age Up ⭐

No Auto Put Away Toys

No Auto Put Away Pet Toys

No Puddles Under Tubs (Toddler Bath)

Has to Pee Walk-style for Kids Only

Better Homework ⭐

Better Grade School ⭐

Better High School ⭐

Preschool for Toddlers ⭐

School Projects are Fun

More School Holidays

25 School Vacation Days

Prom Night Event ⭐

Sleepover Event

Pizza Party Event

Field Trip Event

Family Reunion Event

Pool Party Event

speaking of school... university:

Less Credits for Degree ⭐

University Costs More ⭐

University Holidays Fixed

Higher Scholarships ⭐

Rejection Letter

Harder Distinguished Degree Acceptance ⭐

Degree Required for Promotions

Faster Run to University Class

Teens Jump to University

Choose Your Helmet

Choose Your Roommates ⭐

Roommate Age-Checks

Roommate Significant Other Fix

Roommates No Random Outfit Changing

Roommates No Random Item Spawning in Dorms

Roommates No Spawning Meals

Roommates No Trash

Roommates Sleep All Night

Roommates Less Music

College Org Members Are Uni Students

Faster University Homework ⭐

Faster Tutoring Class

Copy Graduation Photos and Diploma

No Bad Microwave Buffs

No Ghosts on Campus

Sports Fixes

Game Day Event

Graduation Party Event

once you graduate... careers & aspirations:

Plan Career Outfit

Better Work Actions

Enlist in War ⭐

Live in Business

Faster Retail Actions

Faster Record / Edit Videos on Video Station⭐

Higher Acting Gig Payouts & Royalties ⭐

More Realistic Overmax Pay ⭐

Higher Payments for Paintings ⭐

Higher Royalties for Apps/Games ⭐

Higher Royalties for DJ Mixing ⭐

Higher Royalties for Lifestyle Brands ⭐

Higher Royalties for Song Lyrics ⭐

Higher Royalties for Music ⭐

Freelancer Edits are More Successful

Sketchpad No Fees

Campaign Rally Event

Visible Political Position

Watch Political Speeches at Podium

Retirement Party Event

The University Aspiration Pack ⭐

Accomplished Lady Aspiration

Family Aspiration

Grow Up Aspiration

Teacher’s Pet Aspiration

Knowledge Aspiration

Retirement Aspiration

Romance Aspiration

Famous Pastry Chef Aspiration

Twilight Years Aspiration

All-Rounder Aspiration

Programming Genius Aspiration

Travel and Culture Aspiration

Wellness Aspiration

9 to 5 Career Pack ⭐

Night Shift Career Pack ⭐

Part Time Career Pack ⭐

Fitness Career

Health and Beauty Career

Modeling Career

Journalism Career (Adult + Teen)

Trust Fund Career (Adult + Teen)

Welfare Recipient (Adult + Teen)

Saturday Jobs (Teens)

Oceanography Career (Teens)

Private Tutoring Career (Teens)

All Freelancer Careers (Teens)

Tutor (Odd Job)

Woohoo (Odd Job) - lmao

Art Show Event

hahaha... adulting sucks:

Basemental Alcohol ⭐

Happy Hour Event

SNB Realistic Bills ⭐

SNB Banking

Invest in Stocks

Lowered Thermostat Bills

Instant Thermostat ⭐

Auto Wrinkles for Adults

Life Decider

House Warming Party (No More Fruitcake)

Door Knock Notification ⭐

Island Events Notifications ⭐

No Strangers Knocking at Your Door

Quick Showers / Baths ⭐

Shower + Bladder Reliever (don’t judge me)

Power Nap ⭐

Sleep All Night

Smarter Robot Vacuum

Functional Tide Pods

Clean Your Bedsheets

Auto Put Away Clothes

Auto Start/Dry Clothes

Laundry on Community Lots Costs

No Idle Laundry Animations / Sparkles

Don’t Prep Food Where You Angry Poop ⭐

Don’t Wash Dishes Where You Angry Poop ⭐

Eco Dishwasher

Faster Cooking ⭐

No Auto Set the Table

Ask to Cook, Bake, Grill

BBQ Event

Custom Food + Recipe’s ⭐

Custom Drinks + Recipe’s ⭐

Grannie’s Old Cookbook + Recipe’s ⭐

Bake Cupcakes in Oven

Coolers are Cooling

Advanced Fishing ⭐

Fishing Trip Event

Fish for Crabs, Lobster, & Shrimp

More Seafood Servings

More Snacks in Fridge

More Food at the Bar

More Food in the Cafe

Flea Market Every Sunday

Get to Church

just in case you... get famous:

No Fame Decay ⭐

Celebrities Never Reject Fans

Celebrities are Quarantined in Del Sol Valley ⭐

Get Famous Award Overhaul

Less Celebrity Reactions

Famous Sims Gain Followers Automatically

More Follower’s Resolution for Everyone

Free Staff (Chef, Barista, Bartender, etc.) ⭐

Gardeners and Maids on Weekends

Red Carpet Event

whatever you are... just be happy and healthy:

Fitness Controls ⭐

Balanced Calories ⭐

Go for a Walk

Hiking Increases Herbalism Skill

Power Workouts

Athletic Outfit in Winter ⭐

Healthy Drinks

Improved Meditation Stool

Improved Spa Day Tablet

Improved Yoga Mat ⭐

Craftable Pottery

Less Elder Exhaustion

Less Sickness

Longer Basketball Games

More Fun Stuff

Online Gaming with Headsets

and I can’t forget these... more gameplay mods:

NPC Controller ⭐

Improved Autonomy

Simulation Lag Fix

Simulation Timeline Unclogger

Improved Autonomy During Loading Screens ⭐

No Empty Venues When Arriving ⭐

No Temperature Deaths ⭐

No Death from Murphy Bed

No React to Stranger’s Death

Realistic Death (Mortem) ⭐

Memorial Event

Freezing Sims Don’t Turn Blue ⭐

More Club / Holiday Icons

Make Hidden Holiday Traditions Selectable

Random Holiday Traditions

Wellness Traditions

More Holiday Icons

Less Rain More Sun

Less Snow More Sun

Summer Blow-Out Event

Christmas Eve Event

New Year’s Eve Bash Event

No Ugly Rain Outfits

More Umbrella Variations in World

Open Umbrella on Rainy Days Only

No More Broken Umbrellas

Destroy Leaf Piles ⭐

Dress Code Lot Trait

Gender and More Lot Trait

Preferences Lot Trait

Add Sims to Groups During Events

No Auto Club Gathering ⭐

Flower Arrangements Slower Decay

Take Photo Overhaul (Moschino Stuff) ⭐

Snorkel Everywhere

Don’t Turn NPC’s into Spellcasters

No Role Outfits for Sages

ROM Portal Only for Spellcasters

& you also need these... much-needed overrides:

More Sponge Colors

More Sippy Cup Colors

More Dog Leash Colors

White Ice Skates

Better Food Textures (All of Them) ⭐

Hidden Bassinet ⭐

iPhone X Phone Replacement

Playing Cards Replacement

Military Salute Overhaul

Small Saucer Light ⭐

Working Medicine Cabinet ⭐

Working Alarm Clocks ⭐

Realistic Fighting Animation

Oasis Springs + Island Living Palm Trees ⭐

special thank you to all of the wonderful mod creators! seriously, I could not play this game without you guys... (no, really.) There are way too many of you guys to name without missing someone... so if you reblog this, all I ask is that you please tag your favorite modders! (& maybe even add your favorite mods?)

#ts4 #sims 4 #the sims 4 #s4 #s4 mods #the sims 4 mods #sims 4 mods #simkhira #prettyxsimblr #s4cc #ts4cc #reblog to save a life #mods 2020 #ultimate mods list

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origami10 · 3 years

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Ajin ch 86 thoughts

Okay, it’s been a little bit! Thoughts and spoilers under the cut! (Warning, this is very long)

Writing this in a word doc because a) I don’t want to risk going on tumblr and b) I don’t want to risk the post getting deleted in the middle [note from the end: this ended up being four pages long in a Word document, so I’m sorry]

Ahhhh, last time buying the digital magazine >< Until... if... Sakurai starts publishing something new...

It seems kind of unfair not to have Ajin be the cover feature if it’s ending DX I guess they’re just starting with a new series, though. Is that how that works? (It has a main character with white hair so I might be interested...) It’s at the beginning of the mag.

Okay, yeah, pages 111-175. Aggghhhh I’ve always put off reading the end of series, but I think this is the first one I’ve been up to date with when it actually ended. Promised Neverland was close.

ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

ooh completely new characters...?????? whoops overshot the starting page by a few ughhhh it’s definitely the last one... I mean we knew that, but still..... OMG NO IT’S IZUMI AND TANAKA ISN’T IT?? jeez woah I can’t wait to hear other readers’ reactions [edit: yes this was about clover, and she recorded her reaction, which was beautiful ;u;] also omg they’re at least appearing together

omg Sakurai’s author’s note: “It’s very cold, isn’t it. Everyone, I hope you don’t catch a cold.” YOU’RE NOT EVEN GOING TO ACKNOWLEDGE IT’S ENDING?

okay, so at least some time skip Tanaka: New identity, who dis Ooh, Izumi called Tanaka “anta” – the rude/familiar version of ‘you’, rather than the polite one. Honestly I don’t remember but it’s probably what she called him previously. And then turns around and called him anata the next page X’D Okay, I’m glad that not being consistent is okay in Japanese, I always worry/wonder about that ooooh so Tanaka doesn’t have a new identity YET. I wonder how long it’s been?? omg Tosaki prepared it?? Was he thinking that far ahead? Or is he not dead.... ??? okay so he made it ahead of time oh, and Izumi was the one who asked him for it??? Oh wow, Izumi has yet another change of identity. I wonder if she’s back to (omggg I forget D: her original name... Tainaka [hah]) Also another great shot emphasizing their height difference X’) lmaoooo I always love when there manages to be some humor oh, they’re only about three years apart! I wonder if that helps pin down the timeline at all??

Aw, Izumi still respects Tosaki lmao “I’m going home.” “You really have places to be?” Oh I guess that wasn’t quite it- she really was wondering if he was had a living location... so he has been kinda on the run >< [Sakurai. Sakurai, happy ending. There is, right? Right?]

Oh dude I really didn’t think we’d get any resolution on that ship and like, idk if this counts as resolution but it sure looks like it does right now okay I’m really sorry but part of me is like ///we’re using so many of the remaining pages on this/// although oh I guess it’s only been 10 pages... it feels like so many since the chapters have been so short lately...

heyyyyy I mean we kinda knew the U.S. ajin would be back or else what was the point of introducing them Ogura not being dead at the end of the series is extremely impressive (also hopefully Kai :prayer hands: as in I think he survived) so Ogura didn’t tell them he was coming back huh ... with the crew??? :eyes emoji: lmao AND they thought he was dead, I’m cackling oh okay so they had heard he wasn’t dead the close up of Jim’s face reminds of Kai somehow I guess this manga isn’t so long (and the U.S. ajin left enough of an impression) that at least we’re not like WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE “I’ll kill you!!” “Go ahead!!” HA Winnn I think the people in this series need to get their idea of ‘fun’ checked I don’t really understand what he says in the bubble after that... I’ll have to check the English did he like, metaphorically die because he’s out of FKs? I’m not up on my cigarette brands enough to know if that’s an FK or not... I think it’s what the brand turned into...? oh no what’s this omg is it gonna be Kai? Are they all gonna be in there? Kotobuki?? also this is already super sad that not everyone got out of jail free... unless they did and I’ll see... but also it’s realistic so all for the best I guess? i have no idea OH HA I thought it was the juvenile detention center but it’s Takahashi ! o_o not entirely sure I understand what Takahashi says to the guard either at least everyone’s having... fun??? KAI KAI KAI gahhhh this looks exactly like how ch 69 started and agh they’re both in juvie but ahhhhh they’re together?? I’m already scared to read and actually find out –o- oh wait they have dates to get out! and they said plural ‘we’ “That was fast” I feel like that panel represents what this chapter means to me somehow lmao they just want them to be not their problem anymore... that really wraps it up nicely, hilariously, and realistically I’m glad I’m not translating this because there are really a couple lines where I don’t completely understand them “something happened that day” um, yeah WOW I did NOT think we were going to get an answer to whether Kai was an ajin now or not, but I feel like that definitively answers that question????? also that’s terribly funny HE DOESN’T EVEN KNOW KEI REVIVED HIM?? -punches a wall- Kai’s whole personality is ‘I don’t really remember that happening’ >_____________________________> Kei... gave Kai a reason to live... because he almost died...? I still kinda have faith in this wrapping up well but GOD Kai is not a character to invest all your emotion into, laughs cryingly Kotobuki: “You literally never make any sense, man.” oh no “ano natsu” GAH

I just realized that this almost certainly means Kai and Kou never met. There isn’t enough keysmashing in the world to express my desire to throw my laptop at a wall right now

In no way shape or form did I ever expect to get closure on Akiyama, even on him getting out of the barrel

Manabe definitely stole whatever it is he’s holding but it was probably some kind of personal effects...? [my powers of prediction suck most of the time] he really looks beat up now ;u; Izukyū-Shimoda... Win, that’s not where you traveled, is it? Maybe I saw it on the Sunday NHK travel program... but it’s also the end of the train line and has ferries going out into the ocean islands. Is he getting away, or going home.......? or to Hirasawa or something...?

well that was an extremely abrupt shift are they really shooting Satou up into space they’re not using him as a test subject are they that sounds like an even more awful idea than I ever could have come up with okay... oh jeez can we please please not have Satou be Captain America you just KNOW he’s going to make trouble again, ,, , , ,!!

oh jeez Eriko! I didn’t expect to see her but it’s nice! it’s really sinking in that that’s all the closure we’re going to get on Kai isn’t it Eriko tsundere as if that needed confirmed okay cool, so she’s out of the hospital (for now)

It does seem appropriate? Likely? That Kei didn’t go home. WE BETTER SEE KOU THIS CHAPTER oh, it’s fall (or winter? Izumi said it was cold...) oh phew

Sakurai said RIP KeiKai shippers I guess.... but they still influenced each other so that’s still shippable even though they’re not together? sigh not everything is so straightforward and I guess it’s good it reflects that

Kei looks happy enough was Kei working a blue collar job with Kou or something? That’s 100% unexpected Kou adorable omg what is his new name gonna be Also ;-; so they’ve giving ajin rights but everyone’s still staying undercover...? or Kou isn’t I guess, that’s sweet oh wow we admit Tosaki’s great I guess last chapter’s statement that they found his remains must have settled whether he’s alive or not ‘iroiro atta na’ YOU THINK also pretty sure that’s Kai’s line from the drama CD what’s with that Kei face??? OMG PERF also that is scarily close to what I wrote in a fic, but also pretty much to be expected crap I guess at least Tanaka and Izumi are with each other? KAI’S MOON JACKET WITH THE SMILIE we really messed up characterizing Kai as the sun haha he’s out he’s out he’s out is he going to meet someone literally zooming out on everyone (like at the end of last chapter too) is kinda messing with me Like they’re still around and doing stuff but we aren’t (don’t get to) watch them anymore Kou saying ‘let’s all meet again’... my heart is warm ;0; LMAO

we can at least rest assured that everyone stayed in character

I can’t I can’t I can’t [note, this was when I thought Kei saying ‘nah’ was the last page]

O MM FRICKING GODDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

omg Sakurai you’ve done it again bwahahaah a coworker hit him and is like ‘oh cool fine nevermind’ this is WAY more hilarious than I was expecting for this chapter How do I always forget that Ajin has so much comedy not remembering what page number the chapter ends on is nice

Tankobon releases May 7th in Japan Elizaaaaaa Kei’s got a Shion coat

alright uh well I guess that’s good, in a way, we still get to imagine whatever we want

Finishing it hasn’t sunk in yet, I’ve have to get back to you on that one.

#Ajin #Ajin spoilers #ch 86 #ahhhhh

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deeahhnuh · 4 years

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2019!

I've done this year-in-review thing since 2007! 2007-2012 are over on my old LiveJournal, and 2013-on are right here on my Tumblr. :)

2020. 2020! That year sounds space-age or something lol, and not like it's just, well, tomorrow. Happy New Year, Tumblr!

What did you do in 2019 that you'd never done before?

Not too much, lol! I guess I just kept doing the things I usually do, but tried to do them better/improve them (when it comes to work!), or do more of them (fun times and family times!).

Did you keep your New Years' resolutions, and will you make more for next year?

Every year I mention that I don't really make New Year's resolutions - more like little goals all year! - but hey, it's a new decade! This year I think I will make a resolution that I will hold myself to. In 2020, I resolve to work hard - like really hard - on being healthy! Eat right, exercise, lose weight, work on maintaining less stress - be good to myself! I know everyone makes that kind of resolution, but it's a good one for a reason. :)

Did anyone close to you give birth?

Aw, no new babies this year!

Did anyone close to you die?

Sadly, yes... my uncle (my dad's oldest brother) passed away in May. ♥ We also lost a beloved neighbor in August.

What countries did you visit?

Lol, none!

What would you like to have in 2020 that you lacked in 2019?

I seemed to lack the ability to chill this year, haha - I stressed out about everything! :O So I’m ready to go with the flow better in 2020!

What date(s) from 2019 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?

Can’t think of any big dates, but this December marked 5 years since I graduated (and gave a speech at the departmental ceremony, to toot my own horn lol!) from the University of Maryland! Time is bizarre - 5 years feels both forever ago and also not that far back!

What was your biggest achievement of the year?

I’ve been working in the registrar’s office at a community college for three years now! I love it, and I’m proud of the work I do!! :)

What was your biggest failure?

Everything’s a learning experience of course lol, but thankfully I didn’t goof too bad this year! ;)

Did you suffer illness or injury?

Oh my goodness, I started off the year with a thumping in my right ear (the name for it is “pulsatile tinnitus” - which somehow makes it sound scary!). :O Happily, that mess dissipated in a few months’ time, but it sure did worry (and annoy) me! Other than that - all good! :)

What was the best thing you bought?

I was very fortunate this year to buy a few things that really made me smile!

I do love a perfume! Dior Addict is a stunning, spicy vanilla (I love ‘em sweet!) that really hits the spot.

I’m also pleased, on the “I stan goofy dance music” front, to have found a couple of old Ministry of Sound compilations that I’ve had bookmarked on Amazon for awhile - they came back in stock this year and I snatched ‘em up. Anthems Sound of Dubstep (2012) is brash and obnoxious fun, and Sessions Ten (2013) is slightly less brash but just as obnoxious so I love it. They’re both releases from the Australian arm of MOS!

Oh and one of my fave used record stores had a copy of one of DJ Rap’s “Bad Girl” CD singles with mixes I didn’t have; I was kinda shocked to see it and very very happy to buy it! It was only 99 cents. Wow!! I do like a ridiculous deal! :)

Whose behavior merited celebration?

My mom is amazing, as always, and so are my dad and brother! I love my fam!!

Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?

No one!

Where did most of your money go?

See above - my more frivolous spending went toward perfume and goofy dance tunes, haha!

What did you get really, really, really excited about?

I will never, ever forget opening a very special present for Christmas this year. I love and adore It’s a Wonderful Life, and I even wrote a paper about it in college. I used a fabulous book as one of my sources - The It’s a Wonderful Life Book by Jeanine Basinger - and since then I’ve always had it in the back of my mind to purchase it someday. It’s a fantastic keepsake kinda thing for a fan of the movie. Unfortunately it always seemed to be out of stock, or way too expensive to consider, so over time I kind of just put it on the back burner.

But just a few days ago on Christmas morning as we all opened gifts, I tore wrapping paper off a box, pulled off the box top, and bam - there it was. Decorative tissue paper obscured it, but I could see the book cover peeking through - The It’s a Wonderful Life Book! My mama, the best mama, found this awesome book for me! My Christmas - my year! - was made! ♥

What song will always remind you of 2019?

Here’s a Spotify playlist of the songs that I loved this year; most are old releases lol. New(er) songs and albums I loved this year:

“Like Sugar” by Chaka Khan. Funky!

“Lost in the Fire” by Gesaffelstein feat. The Weeknd. Cool and atmospheric!

“Lights Up” by Harry Styles. Boy band guy makes good lol! Great tune.

Mazy Fly (2019) by SPELLLING. Dark, richly layered, weird, beautiful.

The Destroyer - 1 and The Destroyer - 2 (2019) by TR/ST. Two EP-ish releases that make up a whole album-ish listen. The Destoyer - 1 slightly edges out the second release, but I just like hearing so much synthy TR/ST goodness!

Compared to this time last year (2018), are you:

Doin' all right, and hopeful for a great start to 2020!

What do you wish you'd done more of?

Listen to more albums - new or old! The last few years I seem to listen to a handful of albums a year, then spend the rest of my music-listening time playing dance music compilations. Ah well, maybe I'll catch up on my massive "to listen" list in the next decade lol!

What do you wish you'd done less of?

Stress (see above lol) - but I'm def working on it! :)

How did you spend Christmas?

Family time!! ♥

What was the most embarrassing thing that happened to you in 2019?

Nothing, yay lol!

How many one-night stands?

None lol

What was your favorite TV program?

My silly cartoons! Family Guy, American Dad, Bob's Burgers, and SpongeBob SquarePants (lol idk, nostalgia is hard to kick!) still make me laugh even though I am otherwise a perfectly reasonable adult. :)

Bravo's Real Housewives - all of 'em! - crack me up and bring the totally ridiculous drama!

The Orville is fantastic, one of my fave more recent shows. I love the cast! Each episode really adds to their stories and builds the show's world. Looking forward to the next season!

Emergence is a great new sci-fi show with a strong cast - especially the sensible, big-hearted lead Allison Tolman - and suspenseful storyline!

I haven't seen the first season, and to be honest I don't think I'd be able to explain what the heck it's actually about because I'm easily confused, but American Gods caught my attention this year! The cast is excellent - even if the plot escaped me, lol, I really got into the characters.

And What We Do In The Shadows! Such a delight!!

How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2019?

I love a classic, slightly minimal style, but I'm just happy to look decently put-together lol!

What kept you sane?

My fam, my entertainment stuff (music, movies, TV, magazines), working with wonderful colleagues... ♥

Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?

No! :O

What was the best book you read in 2019?

The It’s a Wonderful Life Book was probably the best book I read (well, most of it!) this decade. ♥

What was your greatest musical discovery?

SPELLLING is awesome - definitely an artist I'm excited to hear more from!!

What did you want and get?

I won't say The It’s a Wonderful Life Book again! :)

On a more serious note, I had my first MRIs in a while for MS maintenance - my previous neurologist retired and my new doctor wanted to get a baseline. I was very, very anxious about getting the results. My former doctor last ordered an MRI in 2011, so this was definitely a good and highly necessary step, but very nerve-wracking! I'm so fortunate to not be experiencing symptoms - and haven't since my initial occurrence of optic neuritis in '09 (though I was actually diagnosed with MS in 2011) - but what might the MRIs (brain and T- and C-spine) reveal?

I wanted to receive good results - a report of stability, not progression. And would you believe it? I did. My (amazing!) neurologist gave me the greatest news I had all year - stable, no new lesions, all good!! Of course this is for now - who knows about the future? - but I'm thrilled, and thankful. As this year ends and I reflect on all the good, this takes the cake!!

What did you want and not get?

Pffft, nothin' lol! I've got so many lovely things and reasons to be thankful - who could ask for more?!

What was your favorite film of this year?

Lol I did not see many new movies, but of the '19 films I saw, my fave was Knives Out! I only just saw it yesterday - what a fun way to close out the year! Fantastic cast, clever story, funny - just all-around entertainment.

I also loved Yesterday. All the Beatles references and the obvious affection for the group and their fans just felt like a great big hug! So good!

What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?

Girl I'm well and truly a thirty-something now - 33!! I had fun! I did lots of little fun things with my fam - like shopping, watching movies, that kind of good stuff!

What three things would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?

Like I said above - who could ask for more? Not me! :)

Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?

I'm late to the David Harbour bandwagon - but better late than never!

And also Daniel Craig in Knives Out was a good thing.

What political issue stirred you the most?

Ew, there's something stirring like every hour or so.

Who did you miss?

Losing my grandmother at the end of last year really colored a lot of this year... and then losing my uncle added more shadows. ♥♥♥

What is a valuable life lesson you learned in 2019?

I always answer this one with a twist on the Pet Shop Boys song title and my life philosophy - "Happiness is an option." So here we go! The chorus of the song acknowledges that "it is not easy," and some times are definitely like that. This year had those moments, and next year will too, because that's how life is! It is often not easy.

But! The last bit of the chorus follows "it is not easy" with "happiness is an option." Things can stink, but they can be okay too. That's what "happiness is an option" has always meant to me, and it means that just as much this year. Maybe even more!!

What quote can be used to sum up your year?

See above haha! "Happiness is an option” has been my fave quote for years, and I’m gonna keep on living it! :)

#year #deeahhnuh #2019

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boyslaughplus · 5 years

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Brassica Valentine's Day Special

Hello Tumblr! What a day to start this off! <3

Because it's Valentine's Day, we decided to release a little short story set in the Brassica universe. It takes place a few months before the game but aside from some recurring characters it's independent of the main story (though maybe not insignificant...)

If you haven't played the game, don't worry, this story doesn't need any knowledge of its plot. If you have played the game, you might appreciate some of the details and hopefully enjoy this story that is a little more Ode-centric than the currently released acts.

But without further ado, here's the Brassica Valentine's Special:

Walking into the room, it felt like entering another world. The festive decoration stretching through the entirety of the castle foyer, the exquisite looking food stacked on the tables in the main hall, and of course the colorful crowd of royals, dressed in extravagant suits, robes, and dresses—everything seemed to shimmer and gleam in the light of the chandeliers. Ode certainly wasn’t new to these kinds of events but he still experienced a mild culture shock whenever he attended.

His cousin, Lord Valentine of Barah, had once again invited him to one of his famous birthday parties, or Valentine’s Day as many people called them. It was an event that was famed for the bonds it created, both interpersonal and political, due to the gathering of many young royals and the chance to confess to a crush or to court someone you fancy. Valentine himself chose among about half of his guests a select few who were given a rose. This rose should then be given to someone else who caught your interest and it was looked down on people who left the event not having given away their rose. Similarly, not receiving one marked you as being socially inept, undesirable even as some harsh voices would put it.

Ode did not care much about this custom. Especially this time his mind was set on other matters because more than just attendance, gifts, and well wishes were expected of him: he had been asked to perform for all the guests.

His parents, the king and queen of Barah, liked to boast about Ode’s musical talents since he rarely concerned himself with politics and state affairs. Ode didn’t like to play the role of a musician, less so that of a performer. He liked music and singing, but his audience was usually just the local wildlife and his best friend Friedrich. And that was it. He had never meant to make music a defining part of his public persona.

Even so, Ode didn’t mind the request. If his cousin wanted to hear him sing, he would gladly rise to the occasion. Or so the prince thought before he arrived. Now that he was amidst the cheerful crowd that was basking in the joy and the glory of attending an event as high-class as this one, Ode couldn’t help but nervously eye the stage he would soon be on, under the piercing gazes of everyone in the room.

Searching for his cousin to give his regards and discuss the details of his performance, the young prince of Barah looked around the hall. But with little success. It surely didn’t help that this was a masquerade ball!

In his search for Valentine, Ode passed many eccentric figures. Among them, a dashing royal in a dark suit embroidered with gold and complemented by his long turquoise hair and the rainbow of colors that was his crystal covered mask. A large group of what seemed to be avid admirers, flocked to the man and Ode made sure to steer clear of them as he rarely fared well with such people. He could still hear them laugh as he passed the vegetarian side of the buffet where a lone, lean, golden figure stood. Between most other outfits his wide pants almost seemed exotic though they were still overshadowed by his lack of shoes.

“What a bold choice for a ball in February,” Ode thought to himself.

Taking another look at the dainty royal’s outfit and his mask full of triangular ornaments, Ode wondered where he might have come from to be dressed this way. But there were more pressing matters at hand!

His search continued for a while and subdued the nervousness regarding his performance. When he finally found Valentine, the festivities were already well underway, and it didn’t take long until Ode found himself behind the stage, talking to the string quartet that had already been playing for most of the evening. Now too they would provide the backdrop for his song. A ballad that had resonated deeply with Ode and so he wanted to recite it this evening. Clutching his flute to his chest and with a pounding heart, Ode walked onto the stage to Valentine’s excited announcement.

For a moment he looked at the audience that was quieting down, their expectant gazes locked onto the tall prince who was more than glad to be wearing a mask himself right now.

His nervousness spiked briefly before disappearing completely once the sound of a cello resonated through the hall, indicating the start of the song.

It was the first time they performed it together, but the string quartet was well practiced and it didn’t take long before Ode went along with their rhythm. Unsteady as his flute play was sometimes, Ode had also been told it had character. He stopped to think and just played without worry; A melody a little solemn, if hopeful, he thought, to preface the first verse.

O friends, now I see, the morning draws near The moon looks upon us and all we hold dear

How we will part ways, nobody could say, How long we have left, no one could explain

The end though ’tis sure, is nothing to fear.

We sing and we dance despite illness and death Make most of the time until our last breath

When lost and in pain, we shall not lose hope, Stay resolute still at the end of our rope

’Cause as long as we breathe, there’s still some time left.

The deep voice of Barah’s youngest prince carried well throughout the room and by the time the next verse came around, Ode had nearly forgotten there were other people present, simply getting lost in the song.

But before too long it came to an end and for what felt like forever, the audience stayed quiet. Whispers began to spread among the guests and Ode could feel a wave of tension sweep through the entire hall.

Just then a thought entered the prince’s mind. Had this song really been suitable for such a celebration? What if he just embarrassed himself… his cousin… his kingdom? Lord Valentine initiated a polite if quiet applause as he took the stage.

“My dear cousin, the fledgling prince of Barah, everyone! Now after such a… unique performance, how about we welcome tonight’s main act? I’m sure you have all heard the tales of the bard who single-handedly—”

Ode felt his fears confirmed as he was led off the stage. He really didn’t like gatherings where people valued tact above genuineness. Where a single misstep could mean one’s social death. Had he cared more about the opinions of others, he might have been glum, but seeing Valentine trying intently to salvage the mood of his guests still made him feel like a disappointment.

The prince walked down the room, hearing the whispers and quiet sneers of other Royals behind him as he passed their tables.

Ode needed fresh air.

He left the hall just as the bard began to play and immediately felt relief as he stepped into the cold evening air. This wouldn’t have happened had he sung for the animals. At least they didn’t judge him and appreciated whatever he sang as long as it had heart!

Once he returned home, his parents would surely berate him for tonight’s events. If he could, Ode would just let go of all etiquette and responsibilities and leave the royal world. But whenever he came close to actually doing so, Friedrich told him to reconsider. Told him he was being rash.

Now was another of those moments. Anger rose within Ode that nobody seemed to have cared about his intentions. That nobody seemed to have seen what Ode saw in the song and instead focused only on its melancholic exterior. Without his friend to talk to him, the prince took off his mask, sat down on a bench in the gardens, trying his best to calm down on his own.

Though he would only stay alone for a short moment.

Soon Ode could hear the footsteps of someone else approaching in the distance. They came ever closer before abruptly stopping just behind him.

“Oh… hello. You are Prince Ode, correct?”

The mellow voice enchanted Ode immediately. He turned around and saw a slender, red-haired woman in an elegant dress decorated all over with pearls and flowers.

“Y-yes. That is correct lady, uh—” he hesitantly replied, wondering why she would want to talk to him.

“Sappho. Though you might know me as Seraphina of Radix.”

Indeed, he had heard of her, the crown princess of Barah’s most powerful neighbor land. Although he had never imagined that the heiress of such a mighty kingdom would look so delicate and sweet.

“Don’t you want to listen to the bard, Princess Sappho?”

She snickered and sat down next to Ode.

“Oh no. I needed to go outside for a bit. I have little patience for such mindless racket.”

Ode’s heart jumped at hearing this. Was he maybe not alone in this after all?

“I see. I feel much the same way! Although this wasn’t the main reason I left…”

He stayed silent for a moment, trying his best not to think about the political consequences this conversation could have should he mess up again.

It wasn’t by any means an uncomfortable silence, but to his relief Princess Sappho broke it soon, anyway.

“Well, I have to say I enjoyed your little performance earlier. Genuinely, I mean.” The princess took off her shimmering, cat-like mask before continuing as Ode got lost in the gaze of her bright eyes.

“Few people would have had the courage to perform it here, let alone do so from the bottom of their heart.”

The last thing Ode had expected to be met with this evening was kindness, and he smiled enthusiastically at Sappho, feeling the confidence to openly speak his mind.

“Thank you, Princess Sappho! I was worried that I made a mistake, but your words reaffirm me that the others’ reaction was not my fault! Although… Maybe I am nonetheless unfit for such festivities.”

The princess laughed.

“So what? I have talked with many a royal tonight, but this is the first enjoyable conversation I had. Just because you are not like the rest, you are not any less valid! Contrary so. You should be proud of yourself, Prince Ode!”

Never before had Ode experienced anything like ‘love’. Not in the way it was always sung about. But this very moment he thought he had gotten a glimpse of what it was like. As this realization set in, he took a deep breath to respond to the princess just to be cut short when she continued once more.

“But anyway, I’d happily go on with this conversation but I’m afraid I have to go. There is someone who is waiting for me right now and I cannot spare much more time.”

She stood up, turned to the prince and held out a rose towards him. The one she was supposed to give to someone special. Prince Ode could hardly believe it.

“Farewell Ode. I’m sure we will meet again some day.”

Hastily, Ode straightened his back and gratefully accepted the rose, looking at the princess with a multitude of feelings he could not yet fathom entirely. One of them disappointment that she was already about to leave.

“Farewell Princess Sappho! And thank you!”

A smile flashed on the Princess’s face just long enough that Ode could feel her grasp on his heart tighten. She turned around and walked away further down the path she had come from.

Ode watched her disappear in the shadows of the garden and just now noticed the quickened tempo of his heartbeat.

Long after she had left, Princess Sappho was still ever present in the prince’s mind. For a while he stayed outside, lost in his thoughts and the stars shining brightly above him.

It truly was the most special Valentine’s Day he had ever experienced. Full of determination, Ode made a silent vow. He would see her again.

And he would act upon the feelings that stirred up inside of him that day. For they were far too precious to leave alone.

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tyrannysaurusfloof · 5 years

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Masterlist (Non Youtube/Star Wars Works)

Since I’ve only recently decided to post my fanfiction here as well, I figured posting one long masterlist of them was better than an individual post for each one /o/

Links and summaries under the cut due to length |D

Tolkien Verse

- TOLKIEN SENTENCE PROMPTS: A series of multi-chapter, oneshot based sentence prompts covering a variety of Tolkien characters and pairings. Ongoing.

- HIS FATHER’S SON: Post BOFA Everyone Lives AU. After surviving and recovering from his wounds at the Battle of Five Armies Thorin is crowned rightful King under the Mountain with Fili and Kili at his side. Dis arrives from Ered Luin and the family are finally reunited in their true home again. However, a family secret kept hidden for over 80 years is soon revealed and the lives of the heirs of Durin are changed forever. Complete

- TO HEAL A SICKNESS: Fili is sick and nothing seems to be curing him. At only 50 no one is convinced he will survive. Kili makes the decision to leave Ered Luin, despite Fili’s condition, to find a cure for him in the wide world of Middle Earth. He is determined to do this because if there is one thing he cannot afford to lose from his life, it’s his best friend and brother. Complete.

- DANCES WITH ELVES: Glorfindel is extremely excited about the arrival of the dwarves and yet also seems to be excited about the prospect of dancing with Erestor a midnight gathering he has organised for some reason. Kili is bored because Thorin is gone and he wants to explore so Fili makes up a reason for him to. They stumble over the little midnight dancing session of the elves and decide to join in, but only if it could be done dwarven style. Cue some fun between the heirs of Durin and Glorfindel. Complete.

- BATTLES FOUGHT BEFORE: AU where Legolas fought the Battle of Five Armies alongside Thranduil and did not go off to Gundabad. Legolas reflects on the death and destruction during the Battle of Five Armies on the eve of the Battle of Helms Deep and wonders how he had ended up in the same position again. Complete.

- BONDING: Aragorn worries about the lives of the people of Rohan but Legolas can see that his worry goes down deeper than that and he challenges him about it. The two friends discuss Aragorn’s choices and what they might mean. Eowyn’s stew features. Complete.

- ELROND’S SUSPICIONS: Elrond suddenly realises that since the elves of Greenwood (Mirkwood) have such strong magic that when he has had dealings with Thranduil in the past, after Legolas had passed his majority, it could have actually been his young son in disguise of an illusion. Thranduil and Legolas are approaching Rivendell so Elrond decides to investigate and see if he can find out if his suspicions are true. Complete.

Dragon Age

- Advice From a Ghost: Fergus and Gilmore don't exactly see eye to eye over marriage, but they don't have to worry because they both have someone looking out for them that gives the best advice. AKA Fergus and Gilmore hallucinate about their dead brother/friend after an argument. Complete

- To Be By Your Side I Would Willing Storm the Gates of the Black City: a collection for zevwarden week on tumblr /o/

- A Teryn and His Knight: Fergus Cousland has a problem. And that problem has a name - Ser Gilmore. There's only one resolution.

- Milk Adventures: Fenris wants milk. Hawke has no idea where to buy it. Shenanigans ensue.

- Ferelden Flowers: Carver wants to give flowers. He has no idea what he's doing really.

Fire Emblem Kakusei/Fire Emblem Awakening Verse

- THE THIEF AND THE PRIEST: Libra is a priest of Naga and keeps to himself as well as he can. He looks after everyone that he can, but he doesn’t get too close to people. That doesn’t stop people trying to get close to him. He looks feminine and people assume he’s a woman and try to come onto him. This starts to change when he meets Gaius. Gaius is a thief from all over the place and he just happens to be in the right place at the right time to save Libra from his not so welcome admirers. That is the start of a strange relationship between them, something neither of them really regret. Complete.

- MATERIALISTIC POSSESSIONS: Four times Virion presented Libra with elaborate presents. Four times Libra couldn’t refuse. Complete.

CSI: Miami Verse

- FALLEN FROM HEAVEN: AU where Ryan Wolfe is not all he seems. Eric Delko finds many strange things start happening involving Ryan after he meets the strange man Ryan calls dad and he becomes determined to find out exactly what the reason behind all this is. Ryan however tries his best to keep Eric in the dark but when their emotions get mixed up in Eric’s search it makes it a lot more complicated. Horatio seems to know more than he’s letting on. Complete.

- PARENTAL ADVISORY: Alternate Universe. When Horatio and the team are called out to a homicide they find Ryan Wolfe, an eighteen year old boy who has been locked up for his entire life by his paranoid - and now dead - parents. As Horatio unravels the story surrounding Ryan and the death of his parents he faces a revelation unique and disturbing. Complete.

[K] Project Verse

- [K] PROJECT MURDER SERIES: A three part series revolving around Sarumi and Mikorei. The main story is a multi-chapter fic focusing on “Munakata Reisi is sure Suoh Mikoto is living on inside his head and he doesn’t quite know what to do.”

Yu-Gi-Oh Verse

- I SHALL RECOUNT TO YOU (RE-WRITE): It’s been twelve years since the fateful duel that sent Atem to the afterlife and led Yuugi to a life alone. Life carried on as normal, until a dream leads Malik to the discovery that Atem wants to return to the modern world. Cracking the mystery and bringing the Pharaoh back, Malik, Yuugi and friends, end up with a bit of a mess on their hands caused by the ancient ritual that was used. Features a lot of ships. Ongoing.

Dramatical Murder (Dmmd) Verse

- INTERESTING EXPERIMENT: (A look at what Aoba’s Dmmd Virus/Trip bad end and Re:Connect Virus/Trip route would have been like had it been Mizuki and not Aoba.) Virus and Trip have never heard of anyone recovering from having their mind completely broken by Scrap before, especially someone who was controlled by Morphine. And yet right before their eyes it was happening and they knew in that moment they would get more excitement from Mizuki than they could from Aoba. Complete.

Tales of Vesperia Verse

- WHIRRING HEART: Yuri notices that something is bothering Raven the night before Brave Vesperia are due to go to the Tower of Tarqaron. Concerned with the timing Yuri goes to talk to Raven and finds out the old man is not as confident as it seems. Yuri offers some comfort almost without realising it. Complete.

#tales of series #the lord of the rings #the hobbit #csi miami #k project #fire emblem awakening #masterlist #so queue me

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starkissr · 6 years

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idk why

ppl want to be fake friends like i’d rather have real friends or no friends but i don’t get why ??? ppl rly wanna try n be my fake friend like no listen i’m sorry but i can’t be ur friend on the day u feel lonely n a stranger when ur thriving and omg!!!! this one rly just told me my expectations are too high bc get this! i asked her to consider me like o ok lol so you’re rly telling me in ur twisted idea of a friend I’m not allowed to expect u to care abt me like isn’t that only the literal definition of a friend my mistake??? bc i totally get having no expectations of ppl and all that but at the end of the day when ur then best friend decides to ignore ur existence then come back into ur life whenever they feel like it? like my problem isn’t that ur trying to come back into my life i’m open to whatever ok but when u can’t have consistent intentions to be a good friend u auto = fake aka nobody ???? i GET that ppl mess up obv i’m not perfect either but it’s just admitting that and actually understanding where u went wrong n at least making an honest effort of not doing it again that is SO CRUCIAL

wow wow wojeofiae and like it’s just soooo funny when ur pride is the fucking reason we’re not friends??? like if ur ego is what’s holding u back i rly don’t need someone so easily swayed by that bs in my life? so no i’m not gonna try or give a fuck abt u if ur idea of a friend is not aligned w mine like and if it isn’t that’s fine we don’t have to be friends uk but like idk it sucks tbh bc i’ve been sooo transparent abt how ur lack of words/actions hurt me so bad so u literally know but don’t do anything w this knowledge??? n still wanna try and talk to me like we’re friends after?? fuck no

it’s sad that 2 of my absolute best friends did this to me in diff ways but like this is the underlying pattern n it just hurts so bad when the person ur the closest to in the world and has learned the most abt u and has been thru sooo many ups and downs just one day decides that ur not important to them anymore uk??? like and when they come back later bc of c that’s what they always fucking do! they expect it to be like the old days and make u feel like ur fucking crazy for being hurt when they literally just left u in the dark. it was so painful to grieve thru that period without u bc i had to feel what it was like when u turned ur back on me and yes it was v fucking cold bc when i was ur friend it was all sunny days n that was a stark contrast but

also these past few days rly just make me wanna ask u why tf are u so fucking bipolar and a passive aggressive cunt to me one second and talking to me in ur bubbly tone like im ur friend legitimately 2 seconds later bc oh u just remembered u can use me for this thing or that??? i’ve literally never met an angrier or immature person? like ok obv i’m just off one on this rant so i’m gonna explain just how this girl tried me today! so she’s my roommate n keep in mind like i have told her explicitly my problem w her is that she hurt me when she didn’t communicate w me n went mia like i said this multiple times so no guess work needed n anyway today i was playing music in our room and guess what this girl does!!! puts her music on louder than mine! at first i was like?????????????? literally what? LIKE DID U RLY!!!!!!!!! JUST DO THAT LOL it was rly too much for u to tell me u wanted to play ur music???? i was honestly amazed and was like ok like obv this just sounds like shit at this pt n tbh all i wanted to do was just ask u why u felt that u didn’t want to tell me u wanted to play ur music? but then i checked myself and remembered ur words that i am expecting too much of u when i ask why u don’t care to communicate certain things so i guess it’s too much to ask u this too so like what now? n i just turned my music off after this internal resolution that u literally told me i can’t expect anything from u aka i can’t ever expect u to show up for me so like who is someone to u that is there one day and not the next?? like a relationship needs a degree of stable commitment and if i can never count on u why would i want to waste my time waiting on u to fuck up / my breath for calling u my friend?

the ppl i’m lucky enough to call my friends are ppl that i’m inspired by and i’m not saying ur an ugly person like obv u have parts of u that are so beautiful and that’s who i saw in u before but like if u keep showing me how ugly u can be don’t blame me if u singlehandedly broke my trust in u ??? AND ANYWAY LOL if ur reading this still the CHERRY on top of it all and what actually got me fucking mad is this !!!! girl!!!! asked me for a bandaid a breath after i turned my music off. like. o. ... .m. . . m. g. i just honestly couldn’t believe it n w her cheery ass tone like this is what i’m talking abt how u only matter to them when they need u!!! i was debating asking her abt the music thing now that she decided i was worth speaking to but literally it just wasn’t worth it to hear another one of ur excuses??? i would’ve loved to see what u would’ve twisted out of that situation tbh but i was also like ok like i don’t wanna help u bc ur a cunt but then i was like uk what! she wins if i’m a bitter person bc of her by telling her no so i let her have my stupid bandaid but talk to me like we’re friends one more time and i swear to fucking god !!!!! i won’t be so silent

n my friends are like r u gonna be friends w her after n i’m like ? what friend treats a friend like this ????????? like real q? this is not a friend. why would i say yeah i’ll be friends w her just to make her happy? no bitch my one requirement to be my friend is to act like a fucking friend and if u tell me that’s expecting too much of u like ok but u have to understand! this is my definition of a friend i can’t be ur friend then ! stop half ass trying!!!!!! either leave me tf alone or the moment u choose to decide (and actually act like) u wanna be real to me is when i consider u my friend again uk!! i’m not gonna hold ur shit over ur head but idk i feel like it’s bc they think that i will that they don’t try or honestly i don’t know their reason why but all i do know is there’s a blatant discrepancy between their words and their actions. for both of them but like the one who did this to me first even apologized to me and like i honestly rly appreciated that like it was only! a year and a half late lol but still i was happy but then they went ahead and did them and i haven’t heard of them since! like ok COOL so u just wanted to say we’re friends then go away again like that’s what i’m saying i don’t get it why do ppl want to be fake friends? what’s the pt????????? wow ok these are just the questions that i’m asking myself rn it like tears me apart that the ppl who know me best can’t bother to act like my friend when they wanna still have the perks of calling me a friend ! literally if any of them were to hit me up and put an attempt that lasts o idk beyond a single day to be my friend then i’m down i’m there but don’t fucking tell me i have high expectations for thinking ur my friend yeah obv i’m rly frustrated at everyone for complicating everything like clearly i care so much abt these ppl and that’s why i’m hell bent on trying to make myself feel ok for not taking them back bc as much as i love them i have self respect and literally it would just become an emotionally abusive relationship if i try to engage in a friendship where the friend would just let me down every day like i already have my own shit i’m dealing w why tf would i want to put myself thru unnecessary pain?

like everyone knows when ur being genuine or not. the recent one gave me a fake apology and it was so clear it was fake and last night she even admitted that it was n that she doesn’t think she needs to apologize and like i’m just like ......... so let’s just say i forgot that u can’t stick to ur word ok.... did u rly just have to remind me again?! this is what i’m talking abt it’s just painful and i can’t be ur friend if u can’t be real w me ok that’s all if anyone wants to be a human w me say hi like i rly don’t think anyone reads this so i was gonna delete my tumblr so long ago bc like whats the pt if no one sees u but then i realized how fucking cool that is and how liberating it is to just like put ur thoughts out into the interweb like journal writing is cool n all but on the off chance someone other than me does happen to see this then hi ur only looking at my deepest thoughts so i might as well know who u r lol but like if not (prob) then that’s ok i’ll just lol at myself when i reread this later! as stressful as this is like omg i’m graduating next week and i won’t have these kinda petty problems anymore and like that’s cool when that happens but idk i’m just not ready to grad f m u so ik as like annoying as this is and as stressed as i am abt my classes and assignments and finals and the future i’m eternally grateful for my education n like that’s why i don’t wanna leave! it’s the little things like tn i was at a coffee shop studying w friends n in the car ride back me n one of them were talking abt that one cute barista like he doesn’t matter but having someone to just say whatever the fuck u want w n confide in! it’s these little pleasures that i just love so much!!! n like i didn’t even notice but my friend brought to my attn like how he was acting kinda dumbstruck when he was talking to us n i was like lol fuck ur right that’s fucking hilarious n i had a new thing to laugh abt that i wouldn’t have if i had experienced it alone uk! like talking is literally what allows a relationship to flourish so w these 2 ppl where they just don’t communicate w me like that sounds like such a small flaw but the reason why it’s such a problem is that it literally stunts the friendships growth! how can we connect and etc if u can’t share what’s rly going on w me??????? or like why do u feel u don’t need to talk abt the truth?????? but ya as i was saying lol it’s ok i’ll just have to grind until i can get into my next school (hopefully, someone take me pls lol sos) but ya idk i suffer a lot during school but tbh it’s my fav ever so i’m so sad i’m graduating!!!!!! but like the only thing that’s making it ok is bc all of us are saying the same thing and it’s comforting that even tho we all dk what the fuck is going on i’m not the only one

so mostly sad bc i’m gonna miss my real friends here soooooooo much like w all my heart omg nothing will be the same again and i’m not ready! i’ll miss being seconds away and the fact that i can go over or call them like hoe get ready bc we’re going to the beach that’s down the street!!!! at my parents place the beach is half an hour away and i was in love but u had to drive like an extra 15-30 min to get to even nicer beaches n bruh let me tell u i rly did myself right by going to a school an actual 5 seconds away from the beach and granted besides us students it’s a rich white conservative person area but still it’s in a cute n clean area?? omg like this is just as good as it gets uk??? so ya blessed to be stressed

!?!?@#

#mind

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inonesingleline · 6 years

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Ooh, yes, I have a lot to do today before I can do any celebrating, so naturally let’s procrastinate with the end-of-year fandom meme! THIS GOT REALLY LONG I’M SORRY.

1. Your main fandom of the year: The Good Fight, which is a madness while it’s on, always a dull aching hum in the back of my mind while it’s off, and still makes me feel instantly sick to my stomach every time I see a bit of news about it. Fun! But yeah I guess this is the only thing I participated in fandom for anyway; I wrote a little fic, I made some gifs, I tried to offer comfort to my fellow sufferers. (The show is great and most of you won’t feel sick about it, lol)

2. Your favorite film this year: Another year of not being much of a movie person--and to think 5 years ago it was everything! But favorite film in cinemas was Lady Bird; at home, I’m glad my recent Lesley problem has given me a chance to watch some great Mike Leigh films--I loved High Hopes, Another Year, and All or Nothing.

3. Your favorite book this year: A slightly better year for books; after years of shamefully managing, like, five, I read 26 this year and, more importantly, really got back into the habit in the last few months so I think 2018 will be even better. I read many mysteries, which is always a go-to genre when I’m in a reading funk. But the very best book I read, far and away, was Cassandra at the Wedding by Dorothy Baker. Shout outs to Still She Wished for Company by Margaret Irwin, Alias Grace and The Handmaid’s Tale by Margaret Atwood (hmm wonder why I read those), The Prime of Miss Jean Brodie by Muriel Spark (how had I never read it before???) and Excellent Women by Barbara Pym. Of the mysteries, there is a reason why And Then There Were None is revered; holy shit. The rest were just comfort food. If any of this sounds like your thang, we should stalk each other on goodreads, hmu

4. Your favorite album or song this year: Yeah if I’m embarrassed about my engagement with film and literature this year, let’s not even talk about music. I don’t think I listened to a single new (or new-to-me) thing this year. The only music I listened to at all was a playlist of old favorites I can sing along to on longer drives. And this a year with new St Vincent! Shameful. I did listen to a fuckton of podcasts. All my music time has gone to podcasts.

5. Your favorite TV show this year: Honestly, The Good Fight. And if you want a ridiculous list of honorable mentions, here are all of the currently-airing shows I adored this year in approximate descending order of my love for them: The Good Place, Crazy Ex Girlfriend, Harlots, Grace and Frankie, Catastrophe, Feud, Big Little Lies, American Vandal, One Mississippi, The Marvelous Mrs Maisel, Search Party, Insecure, Alias Grace, The Handmaid’s Tale, Transparent, Brooklyn Nine Nine, Orphan Black, Broad City, GLOW, Better Things, Stranger Things, I Love Dick, Veep, The Bold Type, Younger, One Day at a Time, Schitt’s Creek, Jane the Virgin, The Americans, Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt, Speechless, Colony, The Worst Witch. Among older shows, I discovered To the Manor Born and watched it like seven times in a brief but heady love affair this summer, and The Good Life, too. I rewatched Ugly Betty and As Time Goes By. Oh, and while I guess it doesn’t count for 2017 shows, I honestly adored Mum. And had a weird week where I snarfed down a whole season of Strictly Come Dancing. OK that’s probably enough about television. Clearly, television is what keeps me from engaging with any other form of media. :|

6. Your favorite Tumblr this year: I LOVE ALL MY MUTUALS EQUALLY AND ARDENTLY, even if I’m pretty bad at keeping up conversations with you all xo

7. Your best new fandom discovery of the year: Can I use this space to talk about my year in situations? Obviously in these last weeks I’ve been losing my fucking mind over Lesley Manville, who is a sleeper situation, but clearly a Code Red Level One now. I also had some delightful times with Penelope Keith and Raquel Cassidy, who occupy that delicious but not all-consuming space in my mind that Lesley once did. I almost had a thing with Ashley Jensen, but I guess Penelope stole me away before that got off the ground. And Christine Baranski is clearly my forever girl. I didn’t think my fickle ass could ever love anyone so deeply for so long, but here we are.

8. Your biggest fandom disappointment of the year: Ummm...? I can’t really think of any, although I will say it was frustrating when all I wanted was a good mystery book series to lose myself in and I had to toss aside many half-read or after the first book. (If I’d finished all the books I started this year, I would have finished my reading challenge and then some.) But of those the biggest frustration was, despite enjoying the Agatha Raisin tv series because Ashley Jensen, and enjoying the Agatha Raisin audiobooks on a different level because Penelope Keith, how honestly terrible I found the Agatha Raisin books. So instead I read summaries of them all because I was weirdly invested in that ship for a hot minute, lol. Not worth it. Please come back, tv show.

9. Your TV boyfriend of the year: NONE but ugh I still have embarrassing Gary Cole feelings, and also Peter Mullan’s character on Mum is allowed to date my girlfriend, yeah.

10. Your TV girlfriend of the year: So many??? AUDREY FFORBES-HAMILTON is all goals, Diane Lockhart forever and always, yeah I want to softly cuddle and bathe in the luminous glow of Cathy on Mum, Hecate Hardbroom, both Grace and Frankie, and I had a dream about awkwardly trying to date Tig Notaro, so.

11. Your biggest squee moment of the year: DIANE TURNED OFF THE CAR AND WENT BACK WITH HIM!!! God damn it, I am still so fucking embarrassing about this ship. Also, so many Audrey/Richard moments. I keep thinking I cannot fall in love with another het ship, but if you make mah girl all googly-eyed, I’m probably gonna be there for it.

12. Your most missed old fandom: Nothing buuuut if it counts I did really feel sorry about the Major Crimes fandom after they fucking fucked Mary/Sharon over, and kind of gleefully monitored the carnage from a safe remove. Honestly so terrible, glad I got out of that mess years ago.

13. Your fandom you haven’t tried yet, but want to? Hmmmm I don’t know? I feel like if there were anything major I would be on it already. I know what I like and I do not delay gratification. But if anything, I think I should probably watch Janet King very soon? Also I’m hovering on the point of diving into The Crown; I did try the first episode for Harriet reasons, but could nooooot get into it. But a number of friends/culture bloggers I admire love it. So I may give it another go. If only in anticipation of Olivia Colman!queen yas!

14. Your biggest anticipation of the New Year: P H A N T O M T H R E A D and seeing Lesley on stage doing Long Day’s Journey :3 and the return most especially of The Good Fight and Grace and Frankie. I also do very seriously intend to diversify my fandom interests in 2018: read more, watch more films, listen to more new music. If I have one concrete resolution, it’s that I will see every movie directed by a woman that comes through town--I mean, of course, through the good indie theater, anyway. I’m setting a reading challenge at an ambitious-by-recent-standards 50 books and intend to meet it. And I want to get better at focusing? If I’m watching a show or a movie, I should really watch the show or movie, not play on my phone half the time. Maybe get better at documenting my experiences and reactions. And continue enjoying this Lesley thing until she wears me out.

Everybody do this, I’m really interested in everyone’s fandom year!

#memes #long post #ok better get to work now

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ashthelazy · 7 years

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CR Expo 2017 Con report!

Over the weekend I tabled at Crunchyroll Expo and it was pretty eventful for a first-time con.

Day 1

I was stressing out the week before con because I’ve been making last minute decisions on prints. For example I lost my high resolution files for my large Fire Emblem prints ever since my pc crashed and I only had low resolutions on my tumblr. Fortunately, Kimm bumped up the resolution quality with her photoshop wizardry powers (I still don’t know how she did it but I can’t thank her enough) to have these prints in a large poster size. I ran them through fed-ex at the cheapest rate which really brought down the print quality, but hey, what can you do?

ANYWAY, first day at the con and I’m already a wreck because grid cubes ARE SO HARD TO ASSEMBLE LMAOOOO. My two helpers Kimm and Saga were with me the entire weekend and they really helped pull my shit together. I think what made me anxious about this con was my table location since I was at the very far corner of artist alley. It wasn’t so bad when a flood of people started walking past my table.

The table.

We eventually added Kimm’s bunny to the “Ryuji shrine.”

Even though Friday was pretty slow a lot of weird events happened. Like someone told me I was cute and wanted to exchange numbers. I was internally a hot mess afterwards but he got the message and didn’t insist on it. There was also these three guys who straight up asked me if I drew hentai and apparently they were livestreaming this?? GO FIGURE LMAO. I probably made a fool of myself in front of 3k watchers 😂 😂 ALSO!! KIWI CAME TO VISIT AND DROPPED OFF A GIFT!! I FINALLY GOT TO MEET HER AND SHE WAS REALLY NICE!! AHH I’LL TREASURE THESE BEAUTIFUL PINS AND CHARMS!!!

I really wanted to pin these to my lanyard but I had a feeling people would ask me what table number I got these from and I’d have to constantly say that a friend dropped these off as a gift. ^_T

smol commission of a smol kancolle character.

Because it was pretty slow for us Kimm and Saga walked around the area and kept spending so much on merch and commissions that they were struggling to stop spending any more lolololol. I also stepped out to check out the autograph booth and found out you had to get a ticket beforehand in order to get inside. I WAS A BIT SAD BECAUSE I WANTED TO SEE THE CHOCOBROS BUT IT’S OK.... I HAD ALL WEEKEND TO GET THEIR TICKET.... [to be continued]

It was only the first day and all of us were pretty tired. We checked in to our hotel and ate instant ramen for dinner. In order to avoid clogging the sink we threw the broth into the toilet. hsdfhafoasdfhoasdfhlf;as

Day 2

Heyo I cosplayed Chie.

This day was really busy considering it was the weekend and all. I had such a hard time keeping my wig straight. I think this was also the most times when the artist alley lights would turn on and off on random occasions.

I love how customers get the most reaction out my charms when they flip them over. They would either laugh or go WOAHHHHH.

The future is now.

Apparently there’s this running gag for this day: if Kimm and Saga leave the table I get lots of sales or if I step out I miss out on commission opportunities. I stayed in my table for most of the day to prevent this from happening.

I also!!! Saw!!! An Akira and Ryuji cosplayer!!! The Ryuji cosplayer had a Burger King hat on AND SAGA, KIMM, AND I LOWKEY WERE LIKE. YO MAN. YO. COME TO OUR TABLE. THEY EVENTUALLY STOPPED BY AND RECOGNIZED MY ART BECAUSE OF THAT BURGER KING RYUJI DRAWING I MADE LAST MONTH. AND THE RYUJI COSPLAYER HAD IT AS THEIR LOCK SCREEN.

What a weird turn of events..... I also didn’t know Rodi was at the con and that caught me off guard!!! WE ART TRADED ON THE SPOT AND I GOT THE PHANTOM THUGZ ZINE AND RYUJI BUTTONS. THEY’RE FUCKING AMAZING.

And Debbie stopped by my table!! She dropped off a gift!! AAAAAAAAAAA I’M SO TOUCHED... BEAUTIFUL FINAL FANTASY BOYAS..... DEBBIE WAS ALSO REALLY SWEET ;o; I was overwhelmed by everyone’s kindness and it was only day 2....

I was really scared of walking around the con alone in cosplay because I clam up when people ask for photos but lol i kinda got over it.

I think mid-day was when I ran out of my Akira/Ryuji ramen charm. That was unexpected since I had no faith in it BUT THANK YOU FOR THOSE WHO BOUGHT IT!

I walked around artist alley for a bit and noticed a Noctis shrine for one of the tables. Being the shy fucker I was I asked Saga to deliver my FFXV charms to them in hopes they won’t find me. THEY EVENTUALLY FOUND ME IN THE END WITH ONE OF THEM SENDING ME A CRYPTIC TWEET. SDKFHADS FNFALSFANJA FSD

Right when artist alley was about to close this guy wanted the last Lucina print and I was laughing my ass off because he didn’t care for Lucina or Fire Emblem, he wanted it because it was the last print. When we were bagging it he wanted us to keep the “Last one” sticky note to show off that he got the last Lucina print AND I LOST IT FROM THERE. LIKE SURE MAN WHATEVER FLOATS YOUR BOAT. 😂 😂

Overall it was a good day.... Even though Saga and Kimm were crying over their wallets but they said their purchases were worth it.

Also for dinner we had ihop and their onion rings were made out of pancake mix LMAO.

Day 3 (Warning: unnecessary use of caps lock)

This was my favorite day for several reasons. Like even though I wasn’t able to get tickets for the chocobros in the last 2 days I snagged a Max Mittelman (Ryuji’s VA) ticket! But even after getting the ticket I got nervous because I was really gonna meet him....

Saga asked me to draw a really ugly Ryuji on a cardboard of welch’s fruit snacks so I can have his VA sign it. Though, I think signing is limited to one item unless you’re willing to drop 10 bucks.

L-lewd.

At one point someone dropped off their change in front of Ryuji and left. Honestly, same.

Eventually it was almost time to for the autograph session so I replaced Ryuji’s portrait with one of the ugly drawings Saga requested earlier.

I also found it funny how someone was holding my FFXV print right in front of me while we were waiting to go inside the autograph room. When I finally met Max Mittelman in person I gave him the Ryuji picture to sign.... I’m just trying to keep my composure at this point since I was REALLY NERVOUS IN FRONT OF HIM. After that I told him that I was the artist who drew the Burger King Ryuji art and he gave me a HIGH FIVE!!! I also told him to visit me in artist alley (if he could find me that is) and LITTLE DID I KNOW HE FOUND MY TABLE. I WAS SO CAUGHT OFF GUARD I FELT LIKE I WAS RUNNING MY MOUTH WHEN TALKING TO HIM. HE CAME OUT OF NOWHERE.

HE SAW THE RYUJI SHRINE FULL OF CHANGE I’M SORRY HE HAD TO WITNESS THAT. ANYWAY I’M GLAD HE VISITED ME BUT AT THE SAME TIME WAS THIS EVEN HAPPENING? WAS I DREAMING THIS? I WAS INTERNALLY DYING UNDER THE TABLE AFTERWARDS.....

And the grand finale.... the art trades!!! I got to meet old faces and new ones! Everyone was really kind and it gave me heartburn just thinking about it!! T__T I really appreciate this!! I’d also like to thank Kimm and Saga for being awesome table mates!! Words can’t express how much you made this con even better!

I’m glad I got to table at CR Expo! It was such a huge impact on me that I had to write my thoughts here!! Hopefully I get to table again next year!

#personal

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