#also i just need other people to understand me

[munsooooon]

Steve hates very much to be called "Steven" not even as a joke, he has not talked about it with anyone but implicitly everyone senses it in some way or another and therefore they do not call him that way, it is always Steve or Harrington or some nickname. That's because when his parents called him that it was because they were incredibly angry or drunk and therefore punished him in horrible ways, when they called him Steven he usually ended up getting beaten up. When they called him Steven in public it was enough to make him freeze and make him shiver, eventually he would be silent and terrified for the rest of the evening.

Now being older if someone calls him Steven, he immediately assumes they are fighting with him or that he did something wrong and depending on the situation or the person he will react with sadness or anger, for example, when Tommy called him Steven, it ended in a awful fist fight. It really makes him feel very bad, in recent years sadness is what he felt the most when he hears his name, because it hurts him too much to disappoint the people he loves.

Eddie doesn't know it, but he doesn't call him Steven either, it's always a nickname or Stevie, or Steve or even Harrington. Until one night, when they were in Steve's room kissing fiercely and passionately, Steve was under him doing whatever it took to feel Eddie rubbing his skin, between gasps and accelerated breaths, every little movement Eddie made or every little touch Steve felt, he reacted effusively with his whole body shuddering, he was and felt hypersensitive, he couldn't keep still.

"Steven" Eddie whispered with softness and a beautiful smile, Steve looked at him surprised. "Stay still, I need to take your clothes off, love"

Steve loved that. It was the first time someone pronounced his name with such love. He stood for a few seconds, processing what was happening. He began to shake in anticipation of what Eddie might give him. His brain was short-circuited, and all he could think of was Eddie calling him "Steven" with that authority and that beautiful softness that only he had. He felt loved.

"Are you okay? Do you want us to stop?"

Steve took a few seconds to appreciate him, ran his face gently, because the words wouldn't come out even though they were in his throat. He was always silent when he shouldn't be but he couldn't help it.

Eddie kissed the hand that was on his face, not intending to go any further, and Steve melted once again, he wanted to speak and express loudly the pleasure the other boy was making him feel but he couldn't. Instead, he took Eddie's hand and directed it to his pants to make him feel what he had provoked, to make him understand that he didn't want to stop.

"No, I don't want to stop" Steve said as he sat on Eddie's lap. "Call me Steven again, just you, just you Eddie, call me love, baby, tell me I'm your princess and never stop"

Steve was incredibly loud that night, moving his hips against Eddie's lap, trying to fuck himself harder, deeper. He spoke his name softly and lovingly, until he began to cry, begged for more as tears flooded his face. Eddie held him tight with his arms to keep him right where he wanted him but also to keep him safe to hold him as he released a weight he seemed to be carrying for years.

Eddie couldn't utter a word, it was unbelievable. Eddie was always loud and Steve was quieter, but in the dark, in the security of their love, Steve could be whatever he wanted and could act however he wanted, so he was being loud as he wished because in Eddie's arms no one could punish him.

"You're such a good boy, don't you?" Eddie says softly.

"Yeah?" Steve asks as he chases Eddie, he moans loudly as Eddie once again hits that place on his body, his mouth stays open as he moves on Eddie, soft sounds keep coming out of his mouth, he closes his eyes, because he can feel Eddie all over his body, even though he moves slowly.

"Yeah. You're so sweet, my baby boy, I can't even explain how much I love you, princess"

Steve smiles with his eyes closed. He looked precious, his cheeks were flushed, his lips red, and somehow the tears made him incredibly beautiful.

....

Steve still hates being called that, he finally confessed it to Eddie but also gave him permission to call him that on special occasions. Plus, he told him that he would love to tell his parents what he does with the traumas they caused him. Because now every time he's called Steven it's because he's loved, because he's revered and because he's being fucked incredibly well.

Steve get his name back, Steven belonged to him and Eddie.

#eddie munson #steddie #steve harrington #eddie munson x steve harrington #steddie headcanon #stranger things #steddie ficlet #guys i blame my depression and the deftones for this

[d-lissa]

I am biting anyone that takes Tashi out of the throuple of doom and say that the guys only actually love each other and not her, or would've been better off without her or whatever.

Just say you can't conceive being in love with more than one person at the same time and move on, because that movie was not for you.

#challengers #the entire movie is about how they all needed each other to play tennis (live life) to their best #and how when missing one of them the entire thing felt off #they all bounced out on each other #please stop trying to put them in little neat monogamous boxes they are all three obsessed with each other and that's what makes it #interesting #LET THEM DATE EACH OTHER IN A THREE WAYS RELATIONSHIP DAMN IT #STOP LESSENING THE BOND THEY BOTH HAVE WITH TASHI AND TASHI'S OWN FEELINGS FOR BOTH OF THEM #BITING YOU BITING YOU BITING YOU #honorary mention to the people that don't take her out but also act as if what she and patrick have is lesser in feelings and intensity as #what patrick hadwith art #again. not the point. why are you prioritizing a relationship over another?? makes me think of those people that can't understand #valuing friendships just as much as romantic relationships. just because it's DIFFERENT doesn't mean it is any LESSER in intensity #it's just something else! all three have very different dynamics with each other that belongs to their own categories and can't be compared #or ranked by how “important” they are #jesus fucking christ #i do NOT have the dental health to bite so many people but by god i won't let that stop me

[infinizero]

Danny as The Ghostly Informant TM except nobody realizes it's the same person

Danny after retiring, maybe because the portals are closed or maybe because he became Ghost Royalty or Important Ghost TM who told everyone not to come to Earth, decides to go travelling like or with Dani/Elle

Its really up to anyone whether it was reveal gone right after graduation and dude wants to find himself before doing the whole college thing or reveal gone wrong and is running away maybe in another dimension maybe in the same and Amity Park is a blind zone in any case he goes travelling

The first one he encounters is a more easygoing JL member maybe Flash maybe Wonder Woman trying to figure out how to defeat a Realms ghost so Danny, seeing them struggling, decides to help and either talks the ghost down or soups them

In both cases he opens a portal to the realms and lets them go back through.

They talk a little, Danny as Danny introduces Infinite Realms ghosts as they are trying his best to figure out if they also want to hunt down ecto-entities. The JL member would want to learn more so they exchange information details just in case something like this happens again

Around this time, a JLD member gets wind of the new Important Ghost around the area and needs to find out more about them. After scouting around a little, he finds a way to summon what seems to be a young protective spirit who seems close to the Important Ghost.

Spoiler alert: the protective spirit and Important Ghost are both Danny. All the time travel stuff are attributed to Important Ghost and the beating up other ghosts who come near a specific place to protective spirit. Bonus points if there is a misunderstanding that Important Ghost is protective spirit's parent that's why they beat up Pariah Dark

So they summon Danny as Phantom to ask questions and eventually get the ok to summon him again just in case they need to know things, with the understanding that neither will hurt each other (the JLD member also has the vague idea of asking Phantom to bring Important Ghost over to their side if another worldending thing happenes again)

Soon enough, Danny as Danny meets one of the younger JL adjacent teams (Teen Titans or Young Justice when they're babies? Maybe even Damian's team that I don't know the name of? Maybe the Outlaws?) and helps them out against one of his rogues.

If it's the same dimension, Danny sees that they are younger superheroes and/or not as connected to the government as the older ones, so he warns them about the anti ecto acts and being careful since being so close to death is very slowly making them more liminal/if they're liminal then tells them to stay away from GIW

If not the same dimension then he just gets talking to them about ecto-entities and does basically the same thing as the first JL member he met, eventually exchanging contact information

This pattern continues for a while as Batman receives reports from whichever Robin about ecto-entities being a thing and either holding a meeting because of the anti ecto acts or because there is an entire species that could destroy all of us by possessing Superman and none of you JLD thought to inform me???

At this point of time, most of the JL has met and some even asked for his help and they talk about the various things they've learned from their Informant(Danny) and because it's Danny they slowly get a full picture of everything because he talked about obsessions with one person and cores to another and so on so forth

They all eventually come to the conclusion that they should ask for more details from their Informant

Cue Danny being bombarded by text messages of all the people he's helped asking him about the Realms while being summoned as Phantom.

#danny phantom #danny fenton #dpxdc #dcxdp #batman #justice league #ghost royalty danny phantom #misunderstandings #at one point #someones gonna actually talk about the informant #and someone else is gonna go #hey that sounds a lot like my informant #and someone else says me too #and they all agree not to tell bats because hes gonna adopt Danny if he knew #spoiler alert #clockwork has already adopted him #and wants to get with alfred #so bruce would be trying to adopt his future stepbro #in the meantime #time for the jl to summon phantom! #constantine and raven hiding all the adoption papers #BATS THAT KID IS NOT ADOPTABLE #DONT ANGER AN IMPORTANT AND STRONG SPIRIT BECAUSE OF YOUR ADDICTION

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

Aita for not telling my friend that her husband is gay and cheating on her for months after I found out?

Okay so I really don't know what the right move would have been in this situation and I feel really bad about it.

So I, 28(f) have two childhood friends who I'll call Rose (28f) and Matt (28m). Rose and Matt started dating in school, married quickly after that and have been together for years. It had been a really fairytale relationship and honestly I was really jealous of their relationship for a long time, before this situation started.

So I was hanging out with a friend who didnt know Matt and Rose, who we'll call Ben (30m). We were chilling together and he got a grindr notification. We like to share like who were talking to, what the plans are etc and he showed me this guy he'd matched with and it was Matt. I freaked out, Ben was like "hey maybe theyve got an open relationship and you don't know" I was skeptical but I had to admit that there was a small possibility that was the case. Ben sent me screenshots of Matt's profile and their texts and I arranged to hang out with Matt by himself the next week.

So when we hung out I confronted him about it with the screenshots and he broke down and told me the truth. He's gay, he's known he was gay since he was 13ish, and he's terrified of his, very conservative, family finding out. I asked him if Rose knew, and he confirmed that she didn't and he's been telling her that he's visiting family/other friends and instead meeting guys from Grindr to sleep with.

I was trying to balance my support for him, because I really felt for him and his inner turmoil being closeted for so long - I'm bi myself and it took me a long time to feel comfortable sharing my sexuality with people - and my anger for him cheating on Rose. I was also concerned because he was just meeting randos and sleeping with them with nobody knowing where he was, like bad shit could happen and nobody would know. We talked for over 5 hours going over all aspects of the situation, and by the end of it he said that he was going to come clean to Rose and tell her the truth and theyd figure out what to do from there.

Matt never told her. I waited for two months before I pressed the issue because, well that's a huge thing to talk about and I didn't want to pester him any more that it needed to be pressed. But after two months, he hadn't said anything and I was like "hey, she needs to know about this. You have no idea if youve given her any stis from the number of people you've slept with. She needs to know." He said he was going to tell her when he got home. He didn't.

In fact, Matt never told her willingly. Two weeks after I confronted him for the second time, a different friend came across him on Grindr in an unconnected situation, and he sent the screenshot straight to Rose without talking to Matt first. She immediately left him. She got an sti test and he had given her gonorrhoea.

They're getting a divorce. His family is incredibly homophobic, so Rose and Matt have agreed that they will gender swap who he cheated with when talking to his family (I.e., admitting he was using dating apps to cheat and the number of times he'd cheated but claiming that all of that was with woman rather than men). Since then they haven't spoken and Rose has been staying with her family.

I've told her all of my side of what happened and while she understands why I spoke to Matt first, she says she's upset that I didn't tell her at the same time, as gonorrhoea usually takes about two weeks to develop in the system and she (direct quote) "might have walked away with a shred of dignity if I wasn't peeing fire while i come to terms with being a useful idiot."

I feel dreadful. Obviously the blame really lies with Matt for giving her gonorrhoea in the first place but I can't help but feel responsible for not telling her when it was clear he wasn't going to do it by himself.

Aita?

#aita #am i the asshole

[gffa]

i’m fully obsessed with the fact that through multiple comics it’s implied that as devastated bruce would be (or has been, in Jason’s case) to lose any of his kids, losing dick would literally drive him mad. that boy made a man and a father out of him and losing him would be the end of the world

It's a one-two punch of how Dick is the one whose presence in the world gives Bruce hope, that even when they're not talking to each other, Bruce still knows that Dick exists in the world and that there's hope for life and justice and happiness. The world is still worth something if Dick Grayson is in it. Fighting to save people is still worth it, if the little boy he saved that night can still find a life to be happy in. Followed up with the gut-punch of how Dick is the one who came to him the youngest, the one who understands him the most, the one who taught him how to connect with family beyond the people who were in his life from Before. Never underestimate how much Alfred saved Bruce, gave him stability and love and structure that he desperately needed, but Dick was the one who came along and demanded that Bruce open his heart up further, demanded that Bruce expand his world again, demanded that he openly show some affection, demanded all that just by being Dick Grayson. Dick Grayson is his baby even more than the others, no matter how old he gets, some part of Bruce still sees him that way, because that one came to him when he was the youngest and wore his heart so openly that Bruce's own heart ached with every burst of anger and every burst of love from that little boy. Dick is the one that demanded to be seen and loved and made part of both Bruce and Batman's worlds, just by showing up and refusing not to connect with him. Every time he perched himself on a sofa upside down or sat himself on the edge of a table and asked what was wrong and refused to let Bruce brood, he made himself part of the world that Bruce needed to stay sane. Every time he laughed or made a ridiculous joke or eagerly showed what he'd perfected, he made himself part of the light of Bruce's world. Bruce loves all his kids equally, there's no one that he loves "more" than the others, but he has relied on Dick more than the others, Dick is the one that made those inroads to Bruce's heart possible in the first place, and Dick is the one that refuses to be anything other than A Good Outcome. No matter how many times Bruce starts to angst over his mistakes, Dick will say, yeah, you fucked up sometimes, but I love who I am and I love this life you helped give me, and no amount of mistakes you've made will undo that. You saved me and I love you for it. Dick is his ideal dream realized--someone who fights for justice, who understands the darkness of the world but loves openly anyway, someone who knows the mean and dirty things that must be done sometimes, but still cares about everyone, someone who will devote their life to fighting to save people but won't lose himself. Dick is Bruce's ideal version of Batman. Bruce loves Dick because Dick is so easy to love, because even someone who can be as hard to love as Bruce is is so loved by Dick Grayson, and because Dick understands him better than anyone. He loves Dick because he understands him in return, because Dick is always there when Bruce really needs him, yet also stands up on his own, he has become someone Bruce is proud of in a way that even his hell brain can't rip apart. And he loves him because Dick Grayson is the one that made him realize he could open his heart up to accepting new people into his life even after his greatest tragedy. He didn't have to just hold onto what came Before, he could find new family and love them just as much as he loved his parents, that there will be people worth loving in this new world. Bruce loves all of his family, he'd go off the deep end for any of them, but the one that I don't think he'd come back from is the death of Dick Grayson, the loss of the light of their world. That kid made him want to not just be better, but be part of the world again, because Dick Grayson was in it.

#lumi.txt #dc #batfam #dick grayson #bruce wayne

[saturns7moon]

just had the fattest astrology realisation about myself bro. majority of the time, i’ve always found myself being attracted to people with virgo/aquarius in their chart, but mainly virgo. and for months i’ve been ITCHING to figure out why that is cus i’m constantly always finding that sign in people’s charts when i have even the littlest bit of attraction them, platonic or romantic.

i’m a sidereal libra sun in the 1H. the sun is in fall in libra, basically meaning it lacks light, where the sun shines for signs like leo and aries, the sun is dark for libra. the sun is the core of our birth charts, the center of what makes our birth charts, basically the human equivalent to our personal identity. it is a common thing for sidereal libras (scorpios) to feel as though they have never truly felt connected with their selves. libras are known to be the sign linked with relationships, libra rules over our house of relationships (7H) opposing their independent counterpart aries who rules our first house of self (1H).

from personal experience, i know libras, especially libra suns, have a very difficult time when it comes to understanding their selves. they find their bits of identity in their relationships because commonly growing up their environment might’ve made them feel as though there wasn’t space for them to grow and understand their selves as individuals, so usually like any child would, they would seek that void in other people, satisfying what they truly want by satisfying others. this is why i’ve observed a lot of people claiming that libras have a hard time being with their selves, leading them to have people pleasing tendencies, and commonly in the astrology community, there is that small joke of how libras cannot choose anything or make an easy choice when it comes to simple things like food, and (i’m taking it to the extreme here so i can really make my point, so i’m not saying that this is fact 😭) usually that’s because libras have never had an easy way to create a choice for their selves. i’ve observed that they don’t know how to form an opinion or choice on something independently without background approval from people as there is a fear or anxiety that they might be making the wrong choice which completely juxtaposes their sister sign aries who is known for their independence, and leading their own route, sometimes forming a sort of hyper independence, which is the shadow side of aries opposed to the anxiety ridden side of libra who is afraid to make a wrong decision.

now leading to where i was going with this, virgos are sidereal leo’s. leo’s are the only sign in the entire birth chart wheel that is ruled by the sun. the sun shines, the sun is hot, the sun gives us light. the sun has many benefits, like giving us our vitamin d and also just boosting any type of energy we may need. yknow how people make that joke where it’s like "when you are out in the sun and all of a sudden all your problems in the world are lifted"? basically what i’m getting at is the sun is a light that benefits us as people greatly. now with astrology, and on my personal experience, i’m a sidereal libra sun like i said, and i have a lot of libra in my chart (sun, rising, jupiter) and i’ve always said to my self, i have a hard time understanding my identity and who i am and what i have. and not saying all signs don’t have their shadow side, we all do. but within the astro wheel, all signs have something that somebody else wants, whether you realise it or not.

personally, all the sidereal leo’s i have met have that light, a sense of sureness, a strong grip of identity that i am lacking within myself. it’s so admirable and beautiful to me to see someone shine the way that they do, and whether they know it or not, sidereal leo’s to me are so such impeccably amazing people. they go for their goals and they never stop no matter the circumstance, and their such a beautiful ball of energy that i wish i was myself.

however this is why i wanted to write this as i got the click of understanding on why usually i always get my heart broken by this sign. i’ve noticed that sidereal leo’s, in all my past relationships, have really left a painful mark on my heart and i just couldn’t understand why before, but thank the lord we have astrology 😭.

the sun is a malefic planet, alongside saturn and mars (in vedic astrology) including rahu and ketu (our north node and south node).

personally, what i’ve gathered, is that virgos (sidereal leo’s) have what i lack, and i’m attracted to them because they have the quality i truly desire within me. however the sun is, as mentioned, a malefic planet because it shows what has to be sacrificed in order to make the most growth. the sun is a giant ball of fire. people commonly use fire to purify something in some cultural practices. to purify means you need to burn and leave something behind. you need to kill something to start again and rejuvenate. kinda like a phoenix. i think because i lack light, i’m constantly looking for that in other people, and as i grow up, i’m starting to understand that i shouldn’t look for my light solely in other people and to start with myself, no matter how scary that may be.

the sidereal leo’s i have and do know in my life have taught me different types of things, good or bad. i’m eighteen and still creating an understanding of who i am as a person, so i’m always gonna be taught different types of things. no matter how the relationship ended between me and a leo, i always hold a certain amount of love and respect for that person as they taught me something special for me to understand more about myself, which is truly what i want in life. to understand me and so i can go and help people understand their self. however, i can’t do that if i’m going out there with no fire within me to burn and constantly leaving failed match sticks behind me in piles.

sidereal leo’s are a light in their selves that i love and adore and hope one day i can come to a place and have that for myself, have that light i can cherish the way they cherish theirs. whether they know it or not. for now i’m still seeking approval from people, subconsciously and consciously, but i’m still growing as a person and hopefully one day i can put something out here without trembling in fear on whether i was wrong and what people would think of me lmao. sometimes idc (aries moon and mars, scorpio mercury) but most times i do 😭. but for now, yeah. we’re all just living and growing.

okay i’m done 😭. this was a bunch of waffle i’ve just been writing for thirty minutes and idek if i make sense half of the time lmao. that was a lot🧍🏾‍♀️. and also i’m so sorry i’ve been gone for so long, i usually only write on here when i get that strike of inspiration that i had just gotten now. idk if i’ll be back again, but i’ll try loves 😕🫶🏾. okay bye bye for now <3.

#astro notes #astro observations #astrology observations #sidereal astrology #vedic astro observations #sidereal astrology observations

[missmastectomy]

This is a vent post more than anything, but honestly? Despite the lip service I see a lot of gender criticals give to detransitioners, ime the Average Joe is a lot more likely to sympathize with detransitioners and to see us as fully fledged human beings. People who don’t know anything about the trans discourse aren’t ideologically involved and they’re more likely to approach us individuals first.

I’ve noticed a LOT of gender criticals and radfems basically view detrans women as “traitors” and assume the absolute worst about our motivations. I have literally seen radfems say shit like “well, I could never trust a detrans woman because she transitioned because she hates women and secretly wants to dominate me/rape me/enact misogyny on me,” radfems acting like transition ruins a person and that it’s impossible to ever come back from that. As if there aren’t literally women who used to hold all kinds of problematic/misogynistic beliefs who eventually snapped out of it.

For all the talk about how women need only be biologically female to be women, I’m convinced a lot of the most adamant GCs don’t see us as women. They literally just see us as gender freaks. They have this image in their mind of us as this weird in-between female, separate from the real women.

It’s so incredibly insulting. These people have a caricature of detrans women in their head. I highly doubt most have ever even met a detrans woman irl. It’s so stupid because most detrans women are very clearly female after they’ve been off hormones a few years. I’ve literally known women who were on hormones for years and I had no idea because they sound and look typical. Like, when I first detransitioned a lot of people thought I was male, but now I am gendered female and deal with the same shit as any other woman. And no, not every detrans woman will be able or want to assimilate back into her birth sex, but that still doesn’t take away from her status as a woman.

Detransitioners have literally gone through hell. Where the fuck is all this righteous indignation y’all level at these endos prescribing kids HRT, when you actually talk to someone who went through that? Fuck any GC who treats detransitioners like trash because you lack the basic human empathy to understand that what we went through was abuse. Most detransitioners nowadays started transitioning as children. CHILDREN. Kids who were traumatized, who had already been violated or neglected in some way. We were the ones who got swept up in a massive social experiment and we payed the price for it.

Some of y’all are repulsive. We are human beings, not pawns in your culture war. I see the same crap leveled at detransitioned men, too. Not every detransitioned man was an AGP fetishist that abused women ffs. I also know men who were gay or experienced CSA and ended up pushed into transition as kids. The way people talk to detransitioners and our bodies is disgusting. People calling Jazz Jenning’s SRS shit like a “festering, non-functional fuck hole.” What the fuck is wrong you, that was literally a teenager who was groomed into this is as a 6 year old.

At the end of the day detransitioners cannot rely on other groups, only on individual allies and ourselves. I am thankful for the feminists and GCs who sincerely care about we went through and want justice for people harmed by transition. The rest of you can piss off. Go find another toy to chew on.

#detrans #gender critical #detransition #radblr

[harrietvane]

So, in Busman’s Homeymoon, Lord Peter buys Harriet Vane a mink cloak worth 950 pounds (according to the Dowager Duchess’ journal entry), but he buys Tallboys for “only” 650 pounds.

Even bearing in mind that real estate really did used to be cheaper, do you understand how that is possible? Or how to find out more about relative purchasing power? I used an online calculator website which gave me some figures, but it still seems insane that one could buy an entire Elizabethan farmhouse for 2/3 the price of a garment! Very curious to learn from others who understand this better than I do.

Ah, I see my esteemed colleague @oldshrewsburyian has also had some interesting thoughts on this, so I'll link that here as well before I begin.

So, it's a legitmate question, and there's no catch-all simple answer (in the gotcha sense of 'why didn't i know that bit of cultural Truth'), but there are mitigating factors that take it from a ridiculous price comparison, to merely outlandish. Even taking into account that the coat is quoted in guineas, not pounds, and that PW says the bank valued Talboys at £800 via a mortgage (the paid price was a discount, for paying in cash quickly, which is Plot Relevant), it gets us to roughly the same place, value-wise. Or shall we say PRICE-wise, rather than value, as I'll get into below. There's several factors at play here - they mainly relate to class, and spending power:

-The house is Not That Great, in terms of the kind of property that PW would usually be buying. I mean it is still a large-ish house, big enough to have 2 adults and small children in, but it's not what would be on his radar normally. The only reason they know about it, it that it's near a place where HARRIET grew up as a child. It's not getting any high marks in particular Beauty, Convenience, or Quality - the main reason HV's drawn to it is sentiment, rather than anything else. They both know that they will have to significantly add to it, and alter it, in order for it to be a comfortable home. That would usually be out-of-budget for someone in Harriet's position, who would expect to buy something that meets her needs 'as-is'. Most people looking at buying that house would be Harriets not Peters, so it might be a tough sell.

-The house has no power, and limited plumbing: There's dark references to DRAINS by the dowager duchess, it's entirely possible that this house has no modern plumbing at all - they make the comparison that the huge palace the Wimseys grew up in wasn't plumbed until recently, but then again they do have about 800 servants, whereas Talboys is just a regular house: they will have Bunter alone (at first), with an assist from Mrs Ruddle. There's mention of "a cistern" with some basic valves, but the scullery is mentioned as having a copper, from which hot water is "scooped into a large bath-can" - a copper being, simply, a large metal basin over a fire, in effect. No running hot water, maybe no flushable loos - it's a factor. They also talk specifially about having to electrify Talboys themselves - it's candles and lamps until then. It's fancy camping. By the mid-1930s, a lot of middle-class buyers would expect a little more convenience in both water and wiring, unless they had significant support staff, which Talboys would not be expected to house.

-There's probably no farm! It's a farm house - not a wider land purchase. People like PW's brother the Duke are wealthy primarily because they own land, not because of the big palace they have (which eats money, rather than generates it). The land is what gives them spending power, because other people are paying them rent to live on it, farm on it, or both. PW's own personal 'younger sibling' wealth is also mentioned somewhere to be primarily in real estate (assumed to be in London) - sad to say: he's a landlord, and that's why he's rich. Talboys, on the other hand, as a purchase, would not, in almost any way, be expected to generate revenue through either farming, agriculture, or charging rent. Until they invent house flipping in 80 years, or until the motorway goes through in 40 years, there's not much expectation that Talboys would increase all that much in value.

-Lastly, there's a massive disparity in what The Market Will Bear when we compare a basic residence vs a luxury item (like a mink coat) in the mid-1930s. This is not particular to that time, though. Like any first-year economics student will tell you, the price of something is not it's intrinsic value, it's what someone is WILLING to pay for it. If someone is willing to pay such a price, that's the price it will be. So, we're not comapring Objects, we're comparing Buyers: the the main purchasers of a slightly run-down farmhouse located nowhere special are Harriets, and main purchasers of mink coats are Peters. Talboys is priced for Harriets. The mink coat is priced for Peters.

Compare for example, a contemporary parallel: the Hermes Birkin bag. It's a leather handbag with a starting retail price of about USD 11,400. Just for the bag. Then, you have fancier versions of the fancy bag, eg wikipedia tells me one version sold at auction for USD 380,000 in Hong Kong in 2017. Now, the Harriets of today are not buying a Hermes Birkin handbag, but they are probably trying to buy slightly run-down houses outside urban centers for (one hopes) slightly less than 380k. The Wimseys of the worlds are clearly buying Birkin bags. In that way, it's actually pretty easy to get to a place where Person A might buy a single luxury item for X pounds, and Person B might buy a whole residence for X pounds, and neither feel like they'd done something insane. The key here is in a Wimsey/Vane marriage, they run up against this concept immediately, and repeatedly.

There's a good reason the first epistolary section of the novel is almost entirely taken up with money chat - the ring, the purchase of shirts from Burlington Arcade, the marriage settlement, the gift from the bride to the groom, the mink coat, the bitchy exchange between Helen and Harriet about HV being allowed "six free copies of her book" to distribute. These people come from 2 fundamentally different experiences of the world. They might have gotten engaged using the word 'Magistra', specifically to emphasise their fundamental equality (in the context of learning and the mind, to begin with), but it can't be denied: there's gaps that need to be bridged. They both know parts of their married life will be spent in attempting to do that, hopefully to their mutual satisfaction. Mention of a mink coat for 950 guineas is a nice, neat shorthand for illustrating what's still at play between them here.

#dorothy l sayers #and this isn't even getting into the delicious things like #a) helen being considered unspeakably vulgar by calling attention to the price of HV's ring but #b) peter being considered friendly and polite by openly stating what he paid for talboys #like these are some delicate class rules at play here! when to mention money and when NOT to mention money! context matters! #here's so much going on - this is (I feel) what DLS means when she says she couldn't simply marry them off #they'd have to really engage with what that would mean #and then she wrote 2 whole novels about it #replies #fromthedeskofcripslock

[that-ineffable-devil]

Long post incoming, but I've been on and off it for days so you're gonna see it.

On Charles and Love

I think there's a lot more to Charles' reaction to Edwin's confession than what we may first assume.

Charles loves harder than anyone, but I don't think he even knows what it means or feels like to be IN love--or to be loved back. This isn't a dig at Edwin, so don't @ me. This has to do with Charles' past.

When Edwin first confesses on the steps of Hell, Charles doesn't even hesitate with his response: "Great, love you too, can we go now?" He does love Edwin, one way or another. He hasn't needed to examine that love any further. He doesn't think Edwin could mean it that way, because Edwin probably has never given any indication of feeling that for anyone. Perhaps he didn't think Edwin capable of love in that way. Perhaps it's his own repressed sexuality. Perhaps it's the feeling that he is inherently unlovable. Perhaps it's a combination of things.

On Edwin's and Charles' Repression

Look, Edwin is clearly autistic and heavily emotionally repressed--he's British, from 1916, and male. That's the perfect storm of emotional repression. But he clearly feels and feels deeply--he just doesn't always let on about it. (Which is such a nice thing to see for autistic representation, the "unfeeling alien" trope ain't it.)

And even though they've been together for 30 years, they clearly do not talk about deep emotions much, because it makes Edwin uncomfortable and Charles probably wouldn't manage to get much out before cracking a joke instead--it's his defense mechanism.

As for his own repression, Charles grew up in the 80s as a biracial kid with an abusive father. He was also at least questionably queer while alive: he was part of an alt crowd, wore eyeliner, and wore a single dangly earring. Now that doesn't mean for certain he's queer or questioning, but it IS a pretty common code in media and storytelling. And I imagine no small part of his father's excuses for abusing Charles had to do with "beating the queer out of him." Of COURSE that led to repression--how could it not?

On Feeling Unlovable

And the feeling that he's inherently unlovable? Does he really feel that way? I think so.

He wants it. He wants to be loved so badly. And because of that, he tries so hard. He tries to stay light and happy and kind, even when he's suffering underneath--he has his own flavor of emotional repression. Because if he can't be loved, he can at least be liked.

And he doesn't just want people to like him, he needs them to like him, because he needs to know he's likable. Because there's safety in being likable. There's safety in being funny and friendly and "a good sort of chap." It's proof he's not the monster his father was--the monsters his friends were. It's his shield. The shield he uses to protect himself from the world, yes, but also to protect the world from him. Or at least, who he thinks he is, deep down.

It's also, in his mind, his only chance at being loved. His only chance at staying loved. Because love is earned. Because love is the reward for good behavior. At least, that's how it was as a kid, right? And that's all he knows. He died before he could experience any other kind of love--besides the love between himself and Edwin, which is its own complicated matter.

The other difficult aspect of growing up in a household where love and affection were weaponized and where violence is an acceptable reaction to anger, is how it radically alters your perception of love and family.

You crave the love and validation you never received, but you also fear it and don't believe it's real when it comes without strings.

You struggle to identify love in healthy relationships because if it doesn't hurt, then is it really love?

And even though you crave it more than anything, you're afraid of it. You're afraid for things to get real, because real love--or your understanding of it--is dangerous.

Because love is a weapon and you can't bear for anyone to use it against you again.

Hurt People Hurt People...Sometimes

Trauma manifests differently in each person. There are some commonalities, but it's never exactly the same. I know the saying is "hurt people hurt people" and that's not entirely wrong. But sometimes, hurt people heal people--or at least try to. Charles is in the second group.

Charles never, ever wants anyone to feel the kind of love he knew while he was alive. So he paradoxically loves openly while remaining guarded. His loyalty and devotion are unmatched. He went to Hell for Edwin. But he also never told Edwin the truth about his father until essentially forced to. Because that involves vulnerability. It involves, in his eyes, weakness. And what did vulnerability and "weakness" get him in life? Well...dead.

But he craves reciprocation. He needs to feel like he can be vulnerable, safely. I don't think that Edwin has done anything to make him feel unsafe, but being that they're both emotionally surpressed boys killed by other boys for perceived weaknesses at 16 and the lack of a ghost therapist...it's not all that surprising they haven't dealt with their issues in 30 years.

I think this is why he latches onto Crystal so quickly and easily. Firstly, she's alive: he can at least pretend to ignore his own death for a bit. Secondly, she's his age (sort of) and can see him, which is an uncommon experience at best. Thirdly, again--she's alive, so it can never last--never be real. Either she'll age beyond him, or she'll die and likely be taken to her afterlife. Which he'll happily ignore for the first two reasons.

On Types of Love

I won't get too into this, because I'm in no way an expert in the wide variety of emotions attributed to love. But I will say this: Charles died at 16.

If we set aside the possibility of him being aromantic for now (which he absolutely could be), he may never have had the chance to fall in love while he was alive. If he could even recognize it for what it was. I mean, I'm in my 30s, been married and divorced twice, and I'm still not sure I've ever been in love. At 16, you're drowning in hormones and it can be hard to decipher feelings.

On Arrested Development

If you think about it, his death and subsequent ghostly afterlife are a supernatural version of the arrested development a lot of child abuse survivors experience. But his development arrested literally--he literally CAN'T grow up. At least, not physically.

He may have had 30 years to address his issues, but why would he have thought to? He doesn't have the same responsibilities or needs as a living adult. He's constantly on the job or on the run from Death, he's living with Emotional Repression the Person (my beloved), and frankly...it hurts to examine those problems. How many adults are actively avoiding their own issues?

On the Confession

Edwin, with the most heartwrenching tone of voice since David "I would like to spend" Tennant, makes clear that he's IN love with Charles. And for a moment Charles looks like he's been walloped in the gut with an iron bar, trying to process. But then the trauma-brain kicks in.

He finds the first "logical" explanation to someone (Edwin) telling him they love him: it's a literary reference, and Edwin is...maybe not "messing" with him, but maybe being extra dramatic about this? It can't be real.

But then Edwin gets upset--he's serious about this. And Charles sort of...short-circuits. He can't process this right now, not when they're running for their afterlives. Not when the Night Mother is waiting to split them up. Not when he's barely even begun to process his trauma. So he does everything he can to make sure Edwin knows that, no matter what, he loves him. Maybe not in the same way, but with the same depth.

Because they'll have time. They'll have all the time in the world to figure out what this means. Because they certainly don't right now, and everything Edwin is saying flies directly in the face of every opinion Charles has ever held about himself.

And what the hell is he supposed to do with that?

#charles rowland #edwin payne #dead boy detectives #paynland #payneland #cw: abuse mention #cw: trauma mention

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

question! is it a form of neglect to purposefully not give your children sex ed? i've been thinking a lot abt it lately, especially bc that's how i grew up. when i started asking sex related questions, people would either awkwardly lie or straight up tell me not to ask. to the point my mom would guilt me for asking, saying "you can read i'll find you a book" [never gets me any books abt it] "but stop bothering me bc i have a lot on my hands" ect ect guilting stuff.

like, thinking back on it now, it makes me feel more and more like not giving your kids sex ed on purpose is a form of neglect. i understand NOT knowing sex ed stuff but it seems like when you get kids, it's kinda your job to make sure they get that info somehow? so many people DON'T know basic sex ed or even what CONSENT is and it seems like that's not just a school system thing but sometimes it's also a PARENT thing.

sorry to ramble in your inbox. i've jst been thinking about this a lot, especially being on your blog, and wondered if you had any thoughts on it.

hi anon,

this is a rather thorny question and not one that I feel comfortable making generalizations about.

certainly there are caregivers who intentionally withhold access to information about sex, anatomy, and consent as part of a larger pattern of manipulating and indoctrinating their children, and stigmatize or otherwise punish children for seeking knowledge. in those cases I think we can generally say that withholding information is part and parcel of mistreatment. I assume, based on the rest of your ask, that this is the kind of behavior you mean when you talk about "purposefully" failing to provide sex ed.

but what counts as "purpose"? if a caregiver is otherwise meeting their kid's needs and not doing any cult shit but never raises the topic of sex ed because their kid never asked, or because they assumed that health class had it covered, or because they themself never got any decent sex ed and don't have anything particularly helpful to say, would we then call that neglect? I wouldn't, personally. it's nice when parents can, especially if their kids are coming to them with questions, but I also understand very well that the average parent is an extremely busy person who is doing their best and probably does not have any particularly thorough knowledge of sex. don't get me wrong, I have plenty of issues with how much sex negative behavior and general ick people learn from their families, but I can also recognize that this is a multigenerational cultural issue and that the parents are also the products of their own upbringings.

this is also a whole other tangent but I don't believe parents should be expected to be the primary vessel of knowledge for sex ed anyway, any more than they're expected to teach math or science. but I recognize that that's also a belief that requires schools to have mandatory, semester-long sex ed classes that are taught by a professional like any other subject and frankly the US is just not going to be there any time soon when Republicans are still trying to classify being a drag queen in front of a child as a sex crime.

tldr. it's complicated.

[windvexer]

Hiya Chicken! I was wondering if you could expand upon what you meant in your most recent post (some people DO need physical items)? I think I understand what you're saying (some people are incapable of directing energy for spellwork on their own and need the assistance of tools, and that's okay?) but I'm not sure it's entirely clicking in my brain. Is it somewhat akin to "some people cannot effectively direct their energy without additional forces like correspondences to nail it down"? The idea is something I can get behind, I just want to make sure I'm not missing out on other nuance and completely misinterpreting. It isn't something I've really thought about before, so I want to make sure I'm like. Understanding fully and completely. Thank you for your time :)

Hi!!

We are in reference to this post.

Hey! I like where you’re coming from, but I think there can be more to it. You're really kind for inviting me to talk about my thoughts 😅

Uh... I'd also like to say that this has been on my mind for a really long time, so I don't think the following is comprehensive, but it's a good start.

I also want to reiterate that when most people say "you don't need stuff to practice witchcraft" they probably mean it in an encouraging and anti-consumerist way, which I don't disagree with; I just think it's more nuanced than that.

Accessibility: A part of witchcraft is integrating it into your life so that it’s possible to practice. If you’re a very ‘out of sight, out of mind’ individual, then it may literally be necessary to have physical tools, altars, and reminders around you, or else you’ll wake up 5 months later remembering you wanted to be practicing this entire time.

Also accessibility: You say that some people might need tools to help move energy, which is a factor (more on that later!) but it’s also a thing that some people can’t just sit down in an empty room and focus on visualization + willpower. Not all people can sit still and use meditative focus to direct their thoughts for an extended period of time without any external stimulation. That doesn’t mean they wouldn’t be good at energy work; it just means they can’t engage with that style of practice.

Still accessibility: This is more on the “it’s okay to buy mass produced” side of things, but an interest in witchcraft doesn’t automatically equal talent or interest in handcrafting skills. Making custom boutique tools takes time, money, energy, workshop space, and physical ability that not everyone has. It’s unfair to imply that even if you can buy a ready substitute online for $30, a beginner is a poser if they don’t take four months of free time to hone a personal hobby and make the tool themselves.

Sorcery: Not all schools of sorcery agree that you can advance down the path you want to take while never accumulating physical tools, icons, or ingredients. For example, my paradigm (which isn’t terribly unique) advises that in order to make changes in the physical world around you, then you need to use physical tools. No crystals to impregnate with energy? No herbs to sprinkle into the dinner? No candles? You can’t even direct energy into the threshold, windows, doorways? Then maybe you’re not going to be able to affect physical reality the way you want to.

(But, Chicken! You don’t need physical tools to put energy work into the front door. So you agree that the physical object is still a necessity? Or, no? Is it possible to create a purely astral threshold? Because...)

Energy: Just because you can perform an operation without using any physical tools doesn’t mean you have the personal energy to pull it off, especially not on a regular basis. For example, perhaps someone can create an energy construct of a cauldron sufficient to perform ritual gestation. They cast a spell purely out of energy work, and feed it with energy. That’s all good! But I can’t do that, because it would exhaust me. It’s not that I’m unable to direct energy; I can do energy work. It’s not a lack of talent or education. It’s just that I am literally, physically, too much of a low-energy witch to be able to do a lot of work without tools. If I had to substitute everything with energy work, I couldn’t do a lot of my witchcraft; I am too tired.

Spirit Work: In my paradigm (which is not so rare), a very important way to develop relationships with gods and spirits is to invite them into your physical space by devoting trinkets, houses, shrines, or spaces to them. By giving them a slice of your life, you invite them into your life! I don’t have to do that with a spirit. I can use my energy to bridge the gap with them every time. I can provide energy offerings to them every time they come through to me. I mean – hypothetically. I hypothetically could, but I actually can’t, because even though I can do energy work, I do not have enough personal energy to call my gods and spirits through into my IRL space using my own power multiple times a day. I especially do not have this energy when I need them most – a.k.a, when I am fatigued, distressed, and in need of help.

At a certain point, if Oak tree tells you to go find wood for a staff or wand, you’re going to have to do that. Maybe it’s going to take months or years of spellwork, careful searching, and cunning, but if you want your relationship to progress, it can’t be 100% on your terms. My point in all of this is just to say, I do agree with the sentiment that (as @lazywitchling says) you can't buy skill. And a lot of confusing resources can seem to imply that a beginner has to load up on unnecessary tools just to get started, which is untrue.

But I think sometimes that this push against anti-consumerism and a desire to protect beginners has warped into a sentiment that all witches are supposed to be able to validly work with 100% mental magic all the time for all purposes, which I don't believe is true.

Some people do need stuff! For lots of different reasons! And I think that should be normal and okay.

#answered

[ystrike1]

Don't Take Your Eyes Off Me - By Elvechica (8.5/10)

The mask is off. We all know the idol industry is extremely dark and twisted. It's old news. Being an obsessive fan is frighteningly common. So common in fact that it's not hard to believe crazy stories like this one. Maybe somewhere out there a real-life idol is lurking around, obsessing over one of their own group mates. It's such a crazy thought, but this is the painfully realistic version of that crazy scenario.

Please note: The happy ending of this story is extremely twisted and flawed on purpose. I think this should have been a long form story, with about twenty chapters, but there are only six. It looks simple on the surface, but the main character is just as flawed as his stalker.

Jun is a tall, handsome man with rich actor parents. His father now owns a talent company. He was born with literally every single advantage possible in life, and he loves the performing arts. Naturally he tried to debut as a actor. When he failed he tried to become a model....he failed again...he couldn’t hack it. Not even with a famous last name and good looks.

Jun is scum.

Making a boy band under his father's company label is his last shot. His last choice. Becoming an idol is literally his back up plan, because he can't handle failing. He thinks his lofty parents don't respect him....so he doesn't respect himself and he's willing to take advantage of other people to go higher.

His father offers him a gimmick. Writing. Daddy will pay a talented ghostwriter to write AND COMPOSE trendy idol songs...and Jun will get the credit.

Jun accepts, because at this point he thinks he can't succeed without cheating.

The ghostwriter plan works waaaayyyyy too well. The first single is a bop. Their tiny social media accounts blow up. It'll be a one-hit wonder if they don't keep up with this lucky momentum....so the trio of three takes every job they get offered.

Primula is a trio of pretty, hardworking hotties who fit the boy band bill just right.

Jun Sakuma is a *LYRICAL GENIUS WHO COMPOSED EVERY SINGLE THAT MADE PRIMULA THE SUCCESS IT IS. Also, he's buff and tall and a great dancer. (His voice kinda stinks though, which is a major hint. Being in a boy band is just about avoiding failure for Jun. It wasn't his original passion.)

Yuma is a nice guy, and he is a great actor. He accepts television and stage roles to promote the group. He's also a talented singer, and dancer.

Isshin was an up-and-coming model before he joined the group. He had an existing fan base before he started singing, and he has the voice of an angel. He's very talented with instruments too, and he's the ghostwriter. Jun used up his talent to get his backup boy band debut. Jun doesn't know his unstable career involves standing on a friend's back, and HE DOESN’T FEEL REAL REMORSE UNTIL HE LEARNS THE TRUTH.

Daddy also threatened Isshin. Isshin can't take it anymore. He tells Jun everything. He hates Jun's fake innocence. He hates watching someone who hasn't written a single word take credit for his talent.

(He's lying.)

He says he hates Jun.

(He's lying)

Jun is immediately swallowed up by guilt. He can no longer distance himself from the truth. He doesn't want to be propped up by the genius writer lie anymore. He decides to work harder, and pour all of his passion into the career he chose so half-heartedly.

He understands that Isshin is angry and hurting the most.....so he listens to everything Isshin says.

Isshin uses Jun's body. Isshin controls his diet. Isshin controls what he wears. Isshin says they have to live together.

Isshin claims he is doing this because Jun needs to be strictly trained.

Jun believes this...because he is the weakest link in the group and he doesn’t want to ruin everything for everyone.

He keeps his mouth shut about the ghostwriter lie, because Isshin says he wants the group to succeed.

He's willing to make sacrifices.

Jun should be too.

Jun values himself so little that it damages the people around him. Yuma, his parents, and his managers can all see his talent....but Jun has failed too much and he only sees himself as an obstacle.

When a big company says "his" writing talent is wasted in such a small group....Jun feels guilty for stealing Isshin's talent all over again. It's been a year, and Jun is dying to share the truth because he genuinely loves his fans and being an idol now.

Learning from Isshin has been amazing...besides all the abuse I mean...haha...every form of abuse...

Jun wants to tell Yuma and spill the beans.

The convenient secret that allows Isshin to control Jun.

It all feels so obvious, but Jun is the perfect victim. A busy idol with a strict shedule. He's used to being overworked and abused.

He thought Isshin hated him, but no.

Isshin has been too excited to stay sane for the entire year.

All of that brutal training and control was just an excuse.

Isshin wanted to play with his favorite idol, and he loved every second of it.

When Jun flunked acting Isshin was already there...in the background watching.

Waiting for a chance.

After Jun reveals the secret their relationship begins for real three months later. The group re-debutes because they're still popular and Yuma is a decently popular stage actor.

Why does Jun forgive Isshin?

Well, it's because something is deeply wrong with him. Something is broken inside Jun. Something that is hard to describe.

Without Isshin's obsession he would have faded into nothing. Isshin's weird nonsense actually made Jun a better person. By the end he's no longer totally reliant on his daddy. He's surrounded by good friends, who recognize his talents. He's more confident and he doesn’t see himself as an "untalented" extra.

Even though that's all true any normal person would have rejected Isshin and got a restraining order.

When I say this is realistic I mean Jun doesn't "forgive" Isshin. I mean Jun is an adult that recognizes he also did bad things, and he appreciates Isshin. He admires Isshin's talent too, even if his obsessive motives were impure.

It's wrong, but he loves Isshin anyway.

He wants unconditional love and support in his life, because that's what saved him from falling apart.

Jun has actual practical reasons for accepting his yandere partner besides money, and it's good.

#yandere #male yandere #yandere male #yandere boy #recommendations #recs #rec #recommended #Don't Take Your Eyes Off Me

[eldest-of-katts]

okay because people have shown up in my dms talking smack I'm going to make one blanket statement on the 1000 year loli chilchuck thing.

yes, there has been a problem with young girls being put in suggestive positions in anime with the "uhmmm she's actually a bajillion years old" excuse. yes, other characters don't treat chilchuck like an adult. yes, he is short with big eyes.

However, chilchuck consistently acts like a grown man. he- in both the manga and the anime- straight up just is an adult. He looks like an adult when he is any other race during the swaps in the manga. When the other characters get turned into half-foots they look similar to chilchuck. He is explicitly stated to have more dungeon and general life experience than laios, and he acts like it.

The 1000 year loli trope explicitly functions as an excuse to prey on people who are inexperienced and unable to advocate for themselves. Chilchuck is a parent, is a union organizer, has explicit boundaries that he enforces rigidly, and he is treated as an adult man by everyone who doesn't have a fantasy racism-focused character arc/issue.

I can see how if you haven't read the manga and seen that he has an established life that he later reveals (and haven't paid attention to him in the anime lol) you could get a mistaken impression about him. Marcielle does too in the source material! It's part of her character at the start of her arc that she has issues with longevity!

The thing that irks me a little about this interpretation is that it leans into the child-coded discourse that was prominent a while ago (she's short!!!!! but has boob???? ILLEGAL!!1!) and it does a disservice to the themes of infantilization as a policy maneuver hurting the working class.

I saw chilchuck and his labor advocacy for half-foots both as a metaphor for racism (obvious take ik) and for ageism.

The working gen z as a cohort are being infantilized and pushed out of job markets due to infantilization, similar to half-foots in the show. gen z is being maliciously portrayed as too young to vote, enter office, know themselves, know their rights, and take advantage of their resources. Simultaneously, child labor protections and protections against workplace abuse are being rolled back in the US. In Japan, young people are being worked to the bone for nothing and are becoming disenfranchised as a generation while simultaneously expected to be the labor faction that supports the postwar generations in their old age.

Chilchuck's being treated poorly I saw as a clever commentary on the ways infantilization allows for protections to be stripped away under the guise that "oh it's just a job for teenagers- they don't need more than minimum wage" or "let the kids rescue the economy! they're always complaining about that job market!" while simultaneously stripping away rights under the guise of protection- "We can't have that on the internet! think of the children!" "to protect these young people we must raise the age of medical consent for hormones/reproductive health decisions!"

Kui's work with this series spoke to me on many levels, and specifically, the infantilization issue touched me in a way that few other pieces of media have. The struggle to be taken seriously in a stem field as someone young, as someone female, and as someone who had a high-pitched voice to the point I did years of voice training to be taken seriously, chilchuck's character resonated. I (kinda) understand your instinct to think "SHORT! CHILD! RALLY THE MASSES AND KILL THE PEDOS!!1!" but in this case, it's misdirected- mostly because the author was trying to use this misdirection to prove something to you, the reader.

Kui consistently makes cutting commentary on modern issues, the show's take on food neutrality as its headliner, but also the author's takes on cultural issues and the environment (with a focus on our place in the food web as animals). I feel that reducing chilchuck's very conscious position as a tradesman and an activist discounted due to his apparent age down to "1000 year loli ewwww let's send this random tumblr user suicide bait" just displays a lack of critical analysis of the show and a level of disrespect towards Kui and the work as a whole.

TL:DR- stop sending me kys messages I'm fucking that old man

#dungeon meshi #chilchuck #suicide mention #fandom critical #dw I blocked the person but please refrain from telling people to kill themselves over chilchuck #hes a cool character but he is- still- only a character #long post #I know he's short but short people can still have sex #shocking I know #the person who sent me the message also has a lot of weird opinions of laios #like that he's too 'pure to think about sex' #broooo nooooo don't have weird opinions about autistic people being unable to consent!! #that's weird as fuck! autistic adults are still adults!!! quit infantilizing an already marginalized class!! #you're falling for the blatant misdirects that legislate away our rights!! #I get that it's just an anime it's not that deep #but at the same time the analysis skills are not skilling!!! #the reading comprehension is not comprehending!! the media literacy is not FUNCTIONING!!! #i am WORRIED ABOUT THIS #YOU WILL FALL FOR A PSYOP YOU ARE NOT IMMUNE TO PROPAGANDA #your words and deeds online are indicative of a deeper issue in your thinking that reveals a lack of understanding towards your own biases #you retain puritanical reactions and instincts despite carrying a new title #your understandings of the world are deeply and evidently shaped by flawed and cruel systems that you have failed to examine or grow out of #AUUUUGH please learn and grow as a person suicide bait helps nobody

[celestie0]

hello, my lil smut for ch 10 enthusiasts!

i know most of you are here for porn without plot, with little to no care about the plot, but let me get something very straight to you: ellie has mentioned before that kickoff is a slow-burn, it’s in tags too (cue: go check them out).

you might be wondering what a slow burn is (i fully believe you have slow comprehension skills, it’s fine, i myself am dyslexic), but for your ease here’s a number of definitions of slow burn from google:

A slow burn is when the romantic attraction between characters builds slowly over the course of a novel or series.

— bookriot.com

If something is a slow burn, or if it happens on a slow burn, it develops slowly.

— collinsdictionary.com

The slow-burn genre in movies is typically characterized by deliberate pacing, restrained storytelling, and a gradual buildup of tension and suspense.

— collider.com

Slow burn love is a love that goes beyond the initial spark of attraction — it is, as the name suggests, a kind of love that requires time and attention, but that can also last.

— slice.ca

next time, i would suggest you all should use google to search for terms you do not understand the meaning of, or better yet when you do understand something (which i am sure you do), you must always consider it and the feelings of the writer before you send insensitive asks to them.

moving on, you all are in fact very horny and need to get laid instead of asking ellie or anyone to write you smut. ellie had specified multiple time that kickoff chapter 10 will not have any amount of smut in it. if you want to read smut jjk fandom is very horny there are at least 2000 smuts of gojo satoru on tumblr and ao3 alone, you should read those. very easy to find them.

anyways, here are the reasons why smut in chapter 10 of kickoff is bad idea:

reader is an introvert, she’s not weak, not insecure, she is an introvert. i am not saying introverts don’t hook up because they do so. but reader is not the kind to hook up the first chance she gets.

reader and gojo are not just two people who are lusting after one another, their feelings are both emotionally and sexually very strong for each other and they respect one another a little too much to jump in to fucking each other and ruining their relationship before it even begins. why will it be ruined? because they both have not bonded as much as you all would like to pretend they have.

it is one thing to have sex with a stranger or a friend you find attractive and not let it interfere with your relationship with a person than doing the same with someone you are interested in. when you like someone, there are emotions involved. there is a lot more that satoru and reader need to sort out before they should consider sex.

they want a long lasting relationship with each other, rushing into sex will hinder that, because when you rush into things you do not let them develop with the ease and smoothness that they would have had had unnecessary stress not influenced the they. for a relationship to be successful, the foundation needs to be strong. you do not build a foundation by fucking each other’s brains out but rather by doing other mature stuff like bonding through conversations and emotional and significant gestures.

remember when reader walked out of that washroom leaving satoru with blue balls? remember when satoru refused to touch her when reader when asked him to? yes, you are invalidating their entire personalities by asking them to fuck each other already.

they each have a personality, and neither falls in the bracket of fucking the person they want to spend their lives with without letting the relationship marinate enough to last.

they began fresh in chapter 9, where reader made it very clear that satoru needs to reassure her of his feelings. you are not reading the same fic that most readers are if you think they have been together for a long time now, because trust me the last 4 chapters have been anything but smooth sailing between them. if that is your definition of “been together for a long time”, maybe reconsider the relationships you have in your present lives because it requires revaluation.

when they established starting afresh, it meant they will rebuild their bond, which means that they will need to go back to square one and start to focus on one another in order to strengthen their bond and state their feelings in a more tangible manner.

when ellie wrote this fic, she created an outline of the plot, the events that would take place and their sequence; you expressing your disappointment will do nothing but demotivate her and it will definitely not make her write that smut for you.

this is ellie’s fic, and the plot in her fic does not allow her to write smut in chapter 10. done.

a bonus:

if you’re asking reader to make gojo jealous maybe consider the fact that they have indeed established semi-exclusivity, and in order to build the foundation of a relationship you need to act petty like pulling cheap stunts to make the other person jealous.

i need you to realise that kickoff is a rather realistic, non-toxic piece of fiction where two people who are into each other are not going to fuck before reassuring the other of their feelings.

wait patiently, and the good will come to you. if you can’t do so and would prefer to send ellie hate, send in passive aggressive messages to make her characters have sex, or give her backhanded compliments disguising your demand for the couple to fuck, you should:

use your creativity, your knowledge of english and write a smutty fic.

go ahead and read one of thousands of other gojo smut.

stay quiet and keep your opinion to yourself, kickoff is free for you. ellie is not your provider, she is sharing the fic with you. if you want her to do something that desperately, negotiate a commission.

anyways, kickoff has healed me.

some of you loudmouthed ones may not care about plot, just the smut, but most of us are here for the plot. we like the plot, we like knowing what’s going on in the lives of the characters. we enjoy their lives, we grieve their loses. let the experience be fun for us and ellie, and leave if you cannot behave in a civil manner.

the only things that’s acceptable of you readers are constructive criticism and love. if you don’t have either of it to give, kindly quieten yourself and close the tab. leaving the fic would be easier than being frustrated over it.

apologies for the mistakes, the ask was written and sent in absolute rage over a small fraction of you very insensitive people.

💌🫶🏼

flowie, i could cry. seriously idk how you manage to know my own story more than i do LOOOL but i swear every time that you reflect so deeply on kickoff, it has me in awe and in tears because i just feel so seen by you. and thank you SO much for standing up n making these points, because they are points that i've really wanted to make but was just too scared to, and i feel so safe to see that you've written this out for me in my defense 😭😭😭

those definitions of slow burn had me tearing up so bad idk why sdfkjdshfklj i think because they take slow burn as more than just "oh two characters wait long time to fuck" and make it into something more, and honestly even i needed to have that put into perspective for me! thank you so much :'')

your understanding for my characters 😭😭 i just i canttskfksjdf. i totally agree 100% w all your points, and they completely align w the creative direction i want to take w my story. i KNOW that sex can be spontaneous, and doesn't always need to be goody goody and within the confines of a relationship. i have enjoyed so many stories where sex is wild n toxic n crazy, because i just think it fits the VIBE of that specific story.

but i've tried to show time n time again w kickoff characters specifically that they aren't as inclined to act on their libidos, at least not when they truly care about someone else AND when they're trying to look out for themselves (like the examples you brought up, w reader putting her foot down during the bathroom sex scene. or when gojo refused to touch reader in the hotel room bc he knew that she would regret it in the morning)

i knowww that readers have different perspectives on these scenes, and i LOVE that. there's absolutely no right or wrong way to interpret a scene, because stories are inherently subjective and are meant to be enjoyed that way. i have interpreted scenes in my own favorite stories very differently from maybe what the author had in mind, or what other readers had in mind. but what i find really upsetting about people expecting me to include smut prematurely is that it makes me feel like you're not really reading my story for what is is, and rather you want me to make it into something that YOU want, disregarding all of my other attempts to really try n show my readers who these characters are. if reader was spontaneous or if gojo was careless, and these traits were shown in the story, then maybe i could understand certain expectations, but i've tried to put thought into showing their personalities, and for certain readers to entirely gloss over it and move straight to "SEXSEXSEX" is really disheartening, n yes demotivating for me as well.

there's a difference between "oh my god it would've been so hot if they fucked in that bathroom, but i guess it makes sense why they didn't...can't wait for them to slut each other out eventually tho!!" and sending me a direct ask that just says "i am so disappointed you're not gonna make them fuck in the next chapter, even though you've spent the past two months working on it and it's 80 pgs long and you haven't even released it yet but i'm still going to be passive aggressive n find fault w it because! me want sex!! me want sex!!"

i think deeply about my stories because they are personal to me. it's like journaling essentially LOL. i've mentioned before that kickoff is an ode to a painful situationship i had my first year of college, and i've also mentioned that reader is based off of a very close friend of mine who i love very dearly n i feel so bad that she doesn't believe in herself at times, and i wanted to show her how much i'm rooting for her through my story. i figured, well if i'm going to write a story, might as well share it w others and i'm a horny bitch so of fucking course there's gonna be smut.

like it's a win win situation for everyone i think?? i get to write what i want, i get to share what i want, n i get to entertain my lovely lil readers, n we all get to interact w eachother n make cute lil headcanons n talk about our days, n then we move on w our lives until next time?? why can't it just be like this, lol. i think if some people just really toned down their entitlement, then the writing community as a whole would thrive.

ANWYASY sorry flowie i didn't really direclty respond to your words, kinda went on a rant here, but tbh i think you said everything i wanted to say :'') so thanks bb <33 LOVE YOU SO MUCH

#kickoff #asks #flowie bb

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for getting upset at my ex for being PDA with his boyfriend?

🌱🚌🍰<- To find later

Ages aren't super relevant here but everyone is in their mid-late 20s. About a year ago, my fiance of about 8 and a half years, Jake, broke up with me. It wasn't the smoothest breakup, I didn't take it well at the time, but I've since had a lot of time to think about it and I do understand (and agree with some of) his reasons for it. We're still on friendly terms and recently started casually chatting again 2 months ago after he said he needed a break for a while. I admit I do still love him and we had said at the time that we would want to get back together someday but that it would be a long time before we could consider that again and I wouldn't be upset with him if he changes his mind. There are a number of reasons why things weren't going well, I know I have a lot of body image issues and that had a lot of impact on our sex life, and there was also just a lot of baggage from old issues that built up over the course of the relationship. I've since been in therapy which I know was long overdue and working on a lot of the issues that contributed. Ultimately though, what ended up being the breaking point was issues we were having with polyamory.

I'm going to try and keep things as succinct as possible because the including all the details would make it way too long, but here's basically what happened: Jake and I agreed to be open about sleeping with other people, as long as we kept things out of our shared space. We weren't sure about dating others yet, but we said we'd talk about it if it came up. I know Jake felt jealous about me being with others while I worked on our own intimacy issues, but he told me that he knew that was unhealthy especially if we wanted to eventually be poly. A few months in, I heard from one of our friends, Emily, that a new friend of ours, Daniel, thought Jake was hot and might have a crush on him. I was shocked that Emily would tell me that because she knew Jake and I were together, and I told Jake to discuss what to do about it. He was kind of upset that I told him because he said he would've wanted to hear that from Daniel directly, I argued it was relevant but apologized anyway and dropped it. Over the next few months, Jake and Daniel started texting a lot and Jake started developing feelings for him. When Daniel confessed during a movie night, Jake said he felt the same but that he'd have to talk to me about it first. Jake told me he wanted to go for it, which was surprising because he had said literally the day before that he wasn't sure, but we decided to try poly with some ground rules. Ultimately the issue came down to the "shared space" rule we were already following. I considered making out as sexual, but Jake disagreed and told me that was too controlling if we were allowed to have dates at the apartment. This led to a fight, and when I went to the other room to calm down, I realized that if I couldn't handle seeing Jake with someone else so close to me, I couldn't do poly, so I went back out to tell him. He asked why we couldn't keep talking about it, I said I couldn't change how I felt, and he got upset that I wasn't willing to have a conversation about it now that he had feelings for someone else, so I asked him what he'd want to talk about and he said not to bother because it was obvious I had already made up my mind. The next day he told me we should take a break, and we broke up a week later. I want to make it very clear that I don't blame Daniel for any of this and I don't think anyone was "cheating". As far as I'm aware, Jake and Daniel started dating about 4-5 months after we broke up. I'm not going to lie and say that seeing Jake so happy with someone else doesn't hurt, but I know that's immature of me and I'm working on getting over it.

About a week ago, Jake invited me to go to a bar with a bunch of our old friends. It was a lot of fun and I had really missed hanging with everyone in a group. At some point during the night though, I noticed Daniel being kind of handsy with Jake. I brushed it off because everyone was drunk, but as time went on it became less and less subtle, and I started getting a little uncomfortable. I noticed that one of our more reserved friends, Jason, was also looking a bit flustered. At one point Daniel pulled Jake away from the table to go off somewhere, and everyone just kind of laughed awkwardly before continuing conversation. I know that Jake didn't like PDA before but it's possible that changed, idk.

At the end of the night when people were saying goodbyes and starting to head home, I pulled Jake aside to thank him for inviting me and saying it was a lot of fun and great to see everyone again, but that I noticed people were kind of uncomfortable with Daniel's PDA and suggested that he tone it down a little in the future, especially around Jason. Jake didn't say anything at the time but his smile dropped a little bit and he said he'd talk to Daniel about it.

The next day, I woke up to messages from both Jake and Jason telling me I was out of line and that nobody but me had any issues with their PDA. I even mentioned Jason looking uncomfortable and he said that it was because he had had a crush on Jake for a while now, but that it would be unreasonable for him to ask Jake and Daniel to change their behavior around their friends (which I completely disagree with when it comes to PDA and being inappropriate in public). Jake told me that if I was going to bring our breakup back into the group dynamic it would be better if I didn't come in the future. I asked a few of our other friends and one said that it could be too much sometimes but only when everyone was really drunk, one said that if it did go too far they'd say something, but that it never had, and the last one told me that I was being rude and was clearly just not over Jake.

I don't think I'm an asshole for being uncomfortable with PDA and even if nobody else agrees with me (and at least a couple do), I didn't go about telling them in a rude way at all, but most of the group is saying I was overstepping and to get over myself. AITA here?

#aita #am i the asshole

[pluckyredhead]

☕️ what if I want the rant about ollie cheating now (or whenever you're up for it)

Oh good, because I mentioned it as bait and I'm glad someone took me up on it. 😂

CW: Sexual assault.

Yeah so here's the thing: Ollie has definitely canonically cheated on Dinah at least once, maybe twice depending on your definition. But the idea of Ollie as a serial cheater and womanizer comes from a story where he is raped. Which uhhhh is absolutely NOT cheating.

So for nearly 30 years, Ollie had exactly zero love interests. The closest he came was Miss Arrowette/Bonnie King (Cissie's mom), who appears in exactly 3 stories in the early 60s where Ollie only regards her as a pest...but in a 1969 issue of JLA where all the Leaguers bring dates to a carnival, he brings Bonnie because up to that point, she was literally the only woman he had interacted with besides Wonder Woman.

Also in 1969, he meets Dinah. Within a few issues, he's declaring his love:

Note that there's nothing to indicate that Ollie knows Bruce is stalling for time. He's just down bad.

Anyway, Ollie and Dinah are soon in a committed relationship and remain that way for over 20 years. Starting in the 80s, various writers introduced a couple of brief relationships with other women in Ollie's pre-Green Arrow past, but that's not cheating either - he dated them before he knew Dinah.

Then in 1987, DC introduced Shado, a Yakuza assassin and the best archer in the world, better than Ollie. Ollie and Shado have an immediate and intense emotional connection, but he is in a committed relationship, and neither Ollie nor Shado even vaguely hints at him leaving Dinah for her.

But then Shado shoots Ollie (long story), and then nurses him back to health through his injury-induced fever and delirium. And a little while after that, she turns up with a son, Robert, who looks a lot like Ollie. Dinah is suspicious, so Shado tells her that Ollie didn't cheat on her: Shado had sex with Ollie while he was delirious and thought she was Dinah, and Ollie has no memory of it and has no idea that Robert is his son.

To be clear: this was rape. The story doesn't treat it like rape, and it's clear the writer didn't understand that it was rape. To this day, no comic has acknowledged that Shado raped Ollie. In fact, when Ollie finds out about it years later, he's happy, because he wanted a biological son (this was pre-Connor).

(My feelings about Shado are complicated. I think she's a really interesting character, and I'm loath to discard her because of this one incident that was not intended to be interpreted as rape, but I also think it's really important that we acknowledge that it was rape because our culture is not good about consent. I think we can hold multiple ideas in our heads at once, like "Shado is interesting and cool" and "this is a fucked up story and male survivors should be supported and believed.")

The original comic also didn't treat it as cheating, but subsequent writers did. It didn't help that in the early 90s, there was a scene where Ollie (canonically in the back half of his 40s) is kissed by a college-age girl named Marianne who has a crush on him, and kisses her back. Dinah caught them and eventually broke up with Ollie over it (among other reasons). I think this is one of those things where some people would consider it cheating and some wouldn't, so YMMV.

Ollie was then killed off and replaced by Connor, and Connor's book was written by Chuck Dixon, who really hyped up Ollie's legacy of sluttiness (citation needed, Chuck) in contrast to Connor's virginal but definitely totally heterosexual purity. (Lollll sucks to suck, Chuck.)

Then Ollie was brought back. And as much as I love Quiver, the story that brings him back, it absolutely depicts what happened with Shado as Ollie cheating, which: NO, KEVIN SMITH. IT WAS RAPE. (Interestingly, Dinah seems to consider what happened with Marianne to be cheating, while Roy does not.)

This was also at the start of the post-9/11 era, where there was a real preoccupation with depicting heroes as deeply flawed, dishonest, and generally harmful, with feet of clay - just generally fucking up and being assholes pretty much all the time. (See Identity Crisis, Civil War.) And so Ollie then definitively cheated on Dinah, having sex with Black Lightning's niece Joanna, who was almost immediately murdered by a supervillain afterwards which was also largely framed as Ollie's fault because superheroes ruin everything. (And because Joanna was a triple threat of female, Black, and sexually active, so she HAD to be fridged.)

Dinah dumped Ollie again, and the way Ollie was talked about in the comics - and outside of them - rapidly escalated, with basically every character constantly describing him as a cheating horndog who couldn't keep it in his pants. This dovetailed with Ollie being portrayed as worse and worse in flashbacks around Connor's conception and birth - originally he didn't even know about Connor, then he knew but lied to everyone, then he was actively cruel to Connor's mother, etc.

I think the peak (or nadir) of all this for me was when Dinah told Babs she was marrying Ollie and Babs shrieked that she couldn't because Ollie was a CHEATER who had "fathered Connor with that Shado woman!" Um, Connor's mother is Sandra Hawke, Connor is a good 15 years older than Robert Jr., Ollie had not even met Dinah at that point, and I don't remember who wrote that issue of BoP but if you can't tell the difference between two entirely different Asian women, you're a racist hack.

Thanks to the New 52, this is all pretty much in the past (the New 52 had entirely different Green Arrow problems, including him being raped again but a completely different woman).

But in conclusion: yes, it's canon that Ollie has cheated on Dinah. However, he only cheated after getting a reputation as a cheater when he was in fact a victim of rape. Before that, he was a horndog, but specifically for Dinah and Dinah alone, and he was faithful. And I'm glad that the discourse on this has shifted so much in the past decade or so, because Ollie has done plenty of things we should blame him for, but this wasn't one of them.

#oliver queen #green arrow #meta #rape cw