Tumgik
#also i gotta admit. i spent. SO LONG TRYING TO MAKE SURE HE DIDNT LOOK LIKE FEDSY AND I STILL FEEL LIKE IVE FAILED LMAO
s0urfangs · 10 months
Text
Tumblr media
pink sure is a great colour right guys yeah righ-
First artfight attack, Link for @commanderfloppy :>
30 notes · View notes
reidsnose · 3 years
Text
hair tie
Tumblr media
overview: spencer and the reader start carpooling to work together
genre: fluff!!
a/n: i really dont know if this one is any good i just thought the idea was cute but let me know what yall think :)
masterlist
-
-
spencer was startled by the sudden knock, guests were rare in his little apartment, let alone this early in the morning. a bit paranoid he put his hand over the gun attached to his hip, just in case.
what surprised him even more than the unexpected knock was seeing you through the peep hole when he got to the door.
"y/n? are you ok?" he worried, scanning you up and down quickly to make sure you weren't hurt.
"no um i'm ok," you nervously chewed on your lip, "i was going to call you but i don't have your cell yet. oh my gosh this is going to sound so weird."
you were relatively new to the BAU and they were all very welcoming. the only person who seemed a little bit more closed off was Spencer.
it was true, he was avoiding you a little bit, but only because you were the most beautiful human being he had ever seen; which only made you that much more intimidating. he was afraid. what if he said something stupid? what if the second he opened his mouth you started thinking he was just his IQ. but you were fully a part of the team now. he would have to at least be aquatinted with you.
"its ok, you can say it." he encouraged kindly, causing you to visibly relax.
"ok. oh before i ask i want to preface this by saying you could totally say no i completely understand its a super weird thing especially because we barely know each other." you took a breath as he nodded, a slightly amused smile toyed with his lips.
"i understand the implications. proceed." he mentally slapped himself for wording his thoughts like that.
"do you maybe.. wanna drive to work together? i heard you talking about how you take the train and i also heard that you have an aversion to germs and i drive by your apartment to get to work anyway so i-" you cut yourself off, looking up and seeing him staring at you wide eyed. "i'm sorry this is too weird i over stepped my boundaries and now you dislike me even more. i'm sorry for interrupting your morning. um, you're going to be late for work if i don't leave you alone so ill just- sorry. i'm sorry."
truthfully, this was one of the kindest things anyone has ever offered to do for him. and you offered it with genuine kindness, no ulterior motives to try and get something from him. he stood stunned. how were you so beautiful AND kind. and still somehow a little intimidating.
"we're gonna be late" he called out.
"what?" you turned, having already walked a couple steps from his apartment, your heart beating a bit faster at the sound of his voice.
"you said i'm going to be late. but were carpooling. so we'll both be late," he said matter-a-factly, grabbing his coat and satchel.
"YES!" you laughed, a cracking a wide smile and punching the air triumphantly.
you leaned against the railing of the stairs as you watched him lock up. he was tall and slender and very handsome. so handsome. not handsome like morgan, handsome in a way you were sure you'd never seen before. an incredibly unique and scarce handsomeness that only Spencer Reid had. you tried to forget those thoughts as he began walking towards you.
"i don't dislike you, by the way." he blurted as the two of you walked down the stairs. he felt bad that he made you think he isn't fond of you; the problem was he was too fond of you.
"oh! thats good i've been trying to think of every interaction we've ever had because i was afraid i might have said or done something."
"truth be told," he huffed out a breath, "i was kind of intimidated by you."
you laughed a real, genuine laugh from deep in your belly as you reached your car. the sheer coincidence of the situation as well as your entirely non intimidating nature was seriously laughable.
"you cant be serious! did Garcia tell you?" you asked, completely dumbfounded.
"tell me what?" he asked back, confusion lacing his voice.
"that i was intimidated by you!" you confessed.
"what? this guy in Texas called me a pipe cleaner with eyes! how could i have possibly intimidated you?"
he looked around your car trying to subtly profile you. thats when he noticed you had put hand sanitizer in the passenger side door. and you had pushed the seat back to accommodate for his long legs. it was just two little things, two ways you put a little extra effort in to make him feel welcome, but he was 100% positive if he thought about it too much he would cry. he felt the need to do something like this for you. not to get even or anything, but simply because he wanted to make you feel the way he felt right now.
"i don't know! you're so tall and smart and you seemed quiet but i guess thats only because you were avoiding me. are you sure garcia didnt tell you?" you laughed, watching the road.
now it was his turn to laugh, "no i swear, Garcia didn't say anything about that to me!"
The two of you continued driving, either talking or sitting in a comfortable silence. and this little carpool became a tradition. the two of you arriving and leaving work together every single day, causing the two of you to become closer.
you had to admit, every morning and evening you spent with Spencer made him just seem more and more perfect. unbeknownst to you, the exact same thing was happening with him.
he noticed, one day, as you were pulling your hair up to tie in a ponytail, your hands alternated searching your wrists for a hair tie but there wasn't one there. once he noticed it once, he started noticing it constantly. on a case, in the office, in the car, at a bar. you always seemed to forget your hair ties.
so he went to the store after you drive him home one day, and got a few packs of hair ties. after paying for them, he put one on each wrist and the rest in his satchel, so next time, when you needed one, he'd have it.
he felt like such a creep, constantly watching you to see when you would try to put your hair up. of course the rest of the team took notice, though they had noticed your obvious incline towards each other, Spencer was clearly acting a little weird.
and then it happened.
the two of you were partnered to go to the crime scene on a case, and you went to tie up your hair before you entered the scene. he could hardly contain his excitement, his mind moving a mile a minute trying to decide how he wanted to give you the hair tie. he watched one of your hands search your wrist, but this time it pulled off a little black band and started looping it around your hair.
he couldn't believe it. he finally had a chance to make you feel a portion of the way he felt when he saw your effort in making his car Spencer-friendly, and new he had to think of a new way to do it.
snap.
he looked over and saw you holding what used to be your hair tie, now no longer a band, but a completely useless elastic line.
"you've gotta be-" you muttered to yourself, but your sentence was interrupted as Spencer nonchalantly jutted his wrist towards you. "what are you doing?"
"take my hair tie." he stated simply, trying so hard not to blush. this became even harder as your fingers graced the skin of his wrist while you pulled the hair tie off.
"oh! thank you! you're a life saver!" you breathed, cracking a wide smile as you used it to tie your hair up.
you couldn't help the butterflies going absolutely insane in your stomach. why did he have a hair tie? does he tie his hair up sometimes? why have you never seen it up? you tried to suppress a smile, that would be completely inappropriate for a crime scene.
but you couldn't suppress the warm feeling in your chest. because that was always there when Spencer was around.
-
ultra mega super cool taglist:
@mac99martin @imhreid @spencersmagic @hollydaisy23 @raelady1184 @a-broken-pact @padfootswife
2K notes · View notes
Text
@onehithero said: also we know theres at least some actual animals besides gadoll liek the scorpion n cows tht show up for a sec in ep 1 so tankers hav tht going for them re: food sources ..SORRY FOR RAMBLING SO MUCH deca dence essay got sleeper agent activated
onehithero said: i rly like what usaid abt kabu from natsumes pov too but i cannot form a half cohernet thought abt tht one
onehithero said: ALSO ALSO i think its interesting how the ep 8 conversation w minato is i think the only time kabu talks abt being jealous of humans being able to choose their own paths
onehithero said: also how minatos convinced hes like a good lil cog in the machine yet hes done 50 things tht wuld get him labeled as a bug but he just ignores all tht. the both of them can be so disconnected w reality
onehithero said: like minato didnt know abt 1)natsume 2) how the system has made kabu so severely depressed n he culdnt put up w it anymore.n minato continues pushing the just go along w the system shit he doesnt understand tht he was contributing to kabus misery.. n bc of tht kabu doesnt trust minato enough to tell him abt natsume for so long but then he goes n asks smth so big of him as go against the system
onehithero said: thinks abt how kabu n minato r obviously so important to each other but minato understands him less n less over time & kabu kinda already knew its risky to confide in minato like minato did know abt pipe which was a long time ago but he didnt know abt natsume til kabu was already sacrifing himself for her sake. n yet kabu then goes n tries to get him on his side anyway cuz he wants tht so badly..
onehithero said: OMG OMG CHEWS THESE WORDS SLOWLY N THROUGHLY SO DELICIOUS THANK U THANK U u get it u understand i love reading n writing essay lengh responses abt deca dence & again u just hit the nail on the head w this
Please let me know if this @ u 8 times and sorry if it did.  I will reply under this readmore but i love this enthusiasm! I like discussing this stuff so if u want keep it coming. I wanna understand deca dence better and i think i will by sharing ideas w other ppl. 
I think kabu and minatos relationship  is as good as it is because theres clearly a lot of mutual love and respect between them even when they don’t understand each other and thats why minato still runs after him when he hears kabu going suicide mission lets go baby. I think its interesting that minato was like ready to lie down and accept getting mass scrapped until he hears kabu go im about to be hilarious and hes like actually living and staying alive sounds great actually forget what i said about it being over.   you are so right about kabu and trust and natsume. I will always cherish episode 5 where kabu gives this big rousing speech about how natsume inspired him and saved his life and minatos there like ..who? ..what?? I think they may not be used to hiding things from each other. Also I think them drifting apart mirrors natsume and feis drifting apart tho I think while feis the instigator on that side kabus more on his side and minato like natsume is like wondering what in da world is going on. I think someone else wrote about this better than I can.
I do think minato does know kabus severely depressed because theres this line in ep 4 where he puts his hand on kabu and says like you’ve toiled enough at that awful job. and also in episode 11 when he and kabu talk and kabu says he was in a similar place as minato now in that he was waiting every day to be scrapped minato has no reaction until kabu says but that bug saved me. I think he knows kabus very depressed but he does not know how to address it cuz the system never gives either of them the tools or options for it. Though also I feel the system discourages meaningful relationships between the cyborgs so I think what minato and kabu have is likely pretty rare. Kabu donetello and turkey also fought together for a long time but turkey turns on donetello in a second even tho they fought together, he was his number two, and they were in prison together, and were pretty much all they got and donetello kills him in turn. I also think minato probably knew because he’s empathetic. Like I’m not sure about compassion but he’s very good at understanding where other ppl are and how to meet them in the middle so both parties get something they want. That’s how he got all the gamers to collect the old deca dence parts. Not by cashing in on ppl doing the right thing but by framing it as the final mission. He gets his lgbt community center coworkers for fight with him one last time by appealing to their sense of duty. He got the system to put kabu in jail instead of getting scrapped when Mikey got scrapped for a lesser offense. The list goes on. A tangent but I think the fact he acknowledges the living conditions of the humans are gonna get worse if nothing’s done even tho he’s apathetic at best towards them shows even when the system tries to mold the cyborgs into the roles it wants, sometimes the traits they have just keep on going despite themselves. I’m gonna stop myself before I go into jill and this theme but I’m gonna talk about it someday. So I think its more likely than not he knew but he didn’t know how to navigate around it also because it’s heavily implied he’s going thru the same thing and I think kabu might genuinely have no idea Bc kabu lacks empathy but his heart... is huge. When he hears minato express his feelings of not knowing what he wants he instantly tries to reach out and explain minatos not alone in what he feels. This is why they’re good foils. while kabu moves past where he was in the start where he states he does not intend to oppose the system and his compliance while also trying to do the bare minimum drives him to suicide, and finds the willpower and a reason to live and rebel against the system through his connection to other people (first natsume , he hangs out w kurenai sometimes too, and then with the jail robots). Meanwhile minato whos stuck in his literal ivory tower (it’s a Metaphor) never makes any of these connections. It’s the irony of kabu working at a armor repair job giving him some ability to connect w others vs minatos higher position isolating him from everyone else. I think kabu living amongst the ppl he harmed drove him to give up on life quicker, while minato being far apart shielded him from rlly having to see the effects of his actions I think he was headed a lil slower in the same direction. I think we’re led to believe minatos okay where he is but I think towards the end it’s clear minato has spent most of the series also in a bad place. I think he views things very similarly to kabu in that he wants to use what power he does have to protect the ppl he cares about similar to how initially kabu tried to just convince natsume to quit several times and he was like whatever at the rest of the humans who are natsumes comrades dying but he chooses to put it all on the line and try for some systemic change when he sees natsumes determination to fight. Also I think minato holds very little loyalty to the system cuz he doesn’t only like breaks 1000 rules for kabu (the hypocrisy) but he also looks the other way a lot. For example, when he overheard the top rankers talk about limiters he’s like I’ll pretend I don’t hear it also turn on private mode next time and he doesn’t berate them for considering cheating. Also donetello has been using an illegal avatar to climb to S rank again (isn’t it interesting that even after the ranked system is abolished something similar took its place). And his avatar looks the same as it did when minato worked with the guy. There’s probably like not that many ppl in s rank. And he calls himself donetello. Minato knows he’s supposed to be in jail but does he tell anyone? He’s like well.. that looks like someone else’s problem if they notice *goes and vapes* it’s so funny how little minato cares but it’s also not funny Bc some of minatos cruelest actions and things he’s complicit in are born not outta malice but apathy to everything. I think it shows (tangent number 4?) how the systems use of excessive force is counter productive cuz neither minato nor kabu are willing to report anything to disrupt the order Bc neither of them think the level of punishment is warranted. I also think that minato is probably the first person kabu really opens up to about why on a personal level he feels the system needs to be destroyed after Ep 7 is really interesting. It really speaks to how deep their [mutual and not platonic relationship I don’t know how to label ] is. I also think that he admits to minato that he envies human is rlly interesting and would like to hear what u have to think! I think it’s interesting that what really sets minato off is kabu saying he wants to choose for himself and also wants other cyborgs to have that freedom and I think it’s one of the few times we see minato get genuinely angry and have it not stem from worry. Tangent 5 I’m really extrapolating here but I think it’s very likely given how high up minato is that he likely knows of several cyborgs that rebelled against the system for similar reasons as kabu and knows how it ends and I think it probably feeds into his defeatist attitude. I think his role in the system must really kill whatever grasp of whatever minato has cuz he constantly has to act like it’s almost the end of the world and he’s strapped for resources all the time for like decades and decades of having to fake that type of desperation to entertain ur player base and cuz ur also on tv to entertain the general populace to distract them from their soul sucking jobs. I think that’s gotta mess with his perception of himself and also his ability to see that struggle as real and genuine. I think that’s also gotta be hard cuz he seems like out of his whole fuck we r under attack persona he seems like he’s a lil closed off but generally chill and somewhat upbeat to ppl who know him and he just wants to be isabella from animal crossing. I got really off track here. I think what really gets me is their relationship is built on knowing each other so well and so long , and how it’s managed to survive and persist through all this tragedy. They really mutually respect and love each other and that’s why kabu let’s minato walk away from his revolution even tho it compromises everything he works for. It’s why minato ultimently accepts kabus willingness to die for a tanker even tho he really doesn’t get it at all and it means it’s goodbye forever. But it’s still not enough to save either of them. Minato can’t save kabu from trying to passively starving himself to death and I’m not sure if kabu even knows where minato is at mentally. Sometimes no matter how close u are to someone there r things u miss and things u can’t help each other with. Even tho the two resolve to fight and then die together cuz this seems like the best choice Bc the system they were born into offers no alternatives, the deca dence doesn’t even activate without the help of other ppl. I think it shows one relationship cant support all that weight. In the end it is through their bonds with other ppl that gets them to an ending where they both survive when they decided alone their only option is death. Also u are so right about the other animals existing I totally forgot ty I cannot believe I forgot about the scorpion which calls to natsumes hairstyle which is a visual gag on how natsumes a bug and how like a scorpion, although unassuming, and fucking kill u, just like how her trying to get her boss to open up eventually leads to the whole thing toppling down. I also have a lot of thoughts about natsume but I’m still thinking of them and thinking hard Bc sometimes she becomes kabus inspiration Pinterest board and I don’t like that. When she shines she really shines but it starts getting sloppy towards the end so I have to think a lil longer about it. Okay I’m done. Also it’s kinda hard for me to look like I’m agreeing to ur points and nodding in this format but I really appreciate ur thoughts and will try to convey this. Maybe by formatting as a response to each of ur replies next time
13 notes · View notes
withallthingslove · 5 years
Text
the handmaid’s tale s3ep5 thoughts
PUTTING THEM OUT A DAY EARLY BECAUSE IM SO EXCITED
man just when i think im done with this show it pulls me right back in lol (okay I wasn’t actually done I just was annoyed)
baby holly is so fucking cute
so fucking cute
but man was i annoyed at the beginning of the episode... I like(ish) luke in the way that i want him to be written better and just want to be able to root for him and his story. But I constantly get annoyed with how he is written. Because he was kept alive in the show when he wasn’t in the book it’s like the writers dont know how to include him sometimes so he feels shoehorned into june’s thoughts. I love the story line of him raising holly, but then to have the opening be june talking about how much she misses being held and called june as if nick who she loves didnt do that.... it reminded me of in season 2 when june hadnt thought of luke at all and didnt want to leave nick and then suddenly in episode 9 when luke was the main focus of the episode then june thinks of him. It feels like a cop out and the writers being like “oh time to remind viewers june loves luke because we forget about him until now”
and this isn’t anything against luke. i 100% believe june loves him with all her heart. no question. but it’s like the writers think we are dumb and can’t realize that june can still love luke and their memories while also loving nick in the present. So they waste a monologue of june’s voiceover reminding us that she was married
i told you bitches serena was gonna backslide
I fucking told you
jdfghreuijgrew
if anything this demonstrates that june is a selfless mother and serena is just fucking selfish. her one good deed of letting holly go is nothing compared to june as a mother. june fucking told her seeing holly would not do any good, and she of all people knows that considering HANNAH WAS TAKEN FROM HER. but serena is delusional and she thinks its her right to go see june’s kid and june’s husband while june is stuck in gilead
that phone call with luke.... MY HEART. luke fully expressing his emotion and june trying to keep her’s in.... the utter love they have for each other to this day. one plus of this season is luke finally getting emotional moments. it’s about time
i think lawrence felt really bad for june. he says he doesn’t like her but he clearly does a little bit. the way he silently offered a handkerchief and the way he looked at her after the call ended... you could see the wheels turning in his head like “this is fucked up and i cant really do anything to help her”
tuello looking fine as always
i told one of my friends the other day that while serena sucks and she doesnt deserve love i do want her to just fuck tuello. And I said that since serena is fertile and it’s fred that is sterile she should just go have a baby with him instead. And idk if its my bias to that possible story line or what but i feel like this episode kind of hinted at that? tuello again offered her a way out of gilead and i mean... they’re both hot people and they want this show dragging on for 7 more seasons so they gotta do something
after this encounter though i stan luke
the way he said “fuck you” to serena
the way he did not give her the satisfaction of playing into her delusion 
WE STAN AN ICON
when serena very angrily went “i protected your wife” and luke went “what did you say?” .... where was serena going with that?
because she literally held june down while she was raped including when she was pregnant.... that is not protecting her. has she somehow wiped s2ep10 from her memory??? 
the only two things I could think of was either serena arranging for nick and june to sleep together (lol as if they wouldnt have anyway) and then keeping holly’s parentage a secret, or her covering for holly’s escape and june’s reassignment. If anyone else has any ideas about what that line meant feel free to reply or hit up my ask box because I wasn’t sure how to interpret it. But I interpreted luke’s reaction as either “wait what did she need protecting from?” or “shut up you are the reason she is in danger”
luke was too good for letting serena hold holly and that scene was gross... serena is NOT her mom she’s just a delusional and selfish woman
watching her cry... im supposed to feel sorry for that bitch???? I dont
as soon as fred said “it doesnt have to be” i looked into an imaginary camera like here we fucking go
at first i thought the gift for luke from june was just going to be music to remind him of her but omg
omg 
omg
omg
I knew luke was going to find out that holly is nick’s child eventually based on cast interviews
but
fjrgfhrewfjkrhfkfdjrf
i have so many thoughts on that recorded message and kind of blacked out when i realized what she was going to say. and then she said even more than i thought she would
1. june is so fucking mature. your protagonist could never
2. seriously june articulates everything so well. obviously she is ashamed that she fell in love with someone else and has conflicting feelings about loving two people. and I think it’s so great that she acknowledged that
3. she encouraged luke to move on. that’s.... really big of her. i think june at this point has resigned herself to dying in gilead. But she also tells luke that she is not the same person anymore, and that she had to make a life for herself in gilead. Which is you read any of my posts/anon replies IS WHAT I HAVE BEEN SAYING FOR 2 YEARS. Luke and june obviously love each other SOOOO much. But i think luke has been a bit more daydreamy in his thinking of being reunited while june has always been a realist. that’s why she has survived in gilead for so long
4. SHE SAID NICHOLE’S REAL NAME IS HOLLY. THANK FUCKING YOU. now we can drop the bs of nichole lol
5. She said Holly was born out of love. LOVE. And told Luke Nick’s name. NICK AND JUNE ARE HOLLY’S PARENTS. AND THEY LOVE EACH OTHER. THE WRITERS SAID NICKxJUNE RIGHTS. I have been waiting for this admittance for 5 fucking episodes because we spent so much time on serena bullshit
6. She admitted the reason she stayed was to find Hannah and try and get her out and then told luke she loved him
7. Luke’s reaction... that had to be so hard for him to hear. But at the end of the day I think it’s better to know that than to keep thinking holly is the product of rape. And that’s why june wanted him to know. Holly’s history and her true parentage are important. And I think luke’s reaction was so human and heartbreaking, but the fact luke can take care of holly i think he can have it in his heart to accept what june is saying and not resent her
aight so june’s shopping partner.... not really sure what to make of that scene. She seemed to be in shock. And so much softer than we are used to seeing and I felt like that was a hint to her true personality. But who knows
fyi in case you guys forgot... the waterfords suck ESPECIALLY SERENA 
111 notes · View notes
love-loser · 5 years
Note
16 or 2 👀 or maybe 16 AND 2? Like younger brat tony who’s breadwinner to his exasperated older hubby,,
16. professor peter x cocky student tony 
SORRY OMG THIS IS SO LONG jkhddh thank you for the ask! i didnt know how to combine 2 and 16 so i just wrote 16, but someone else asked for 2 so fear not, you will be getting it. hope you enjoy
prompts here 
MOBILE USERS READ HERE PLS!! 
Even though college was a volatile time for many, this whole higher education thing was going pretty well for Peter. Granted, he’s the one teaching the class, but still, pretty good seeing as see he was so young (25) and oh so (very) endearing, both of which helped him get along with his students.
Well, most of his students.
He never knew just how much one person could annoy him but walking into class, seeing that stupid smirk on the younger boy’s smirk, just made his coffee taste that much bitter, the junior never failing to make his day just a bit shitty, somehow. 
Even more- he’d always managed to somehow know the material even though Peter was sure he was either sleeping or on his phone half the time. The Engineering professor could probably count on one hand the number of times he’d seen the brunette actually take notes. And it was already halfway into the semester. It hadn’t even caught Tony off guard when he tried to call on the boy. 
What he hated the most, though, was the way Tony’s stupid, stupid, intense, dusky eyes always seemed to undress him everytime he walked into the room. The way his hands made his excessively big iPhone look tiny when he wrapped his capable fingers around it and- not to mention those same fingers that rubbed against his lips as he blatantly checked his own professor out, in class, no less. Did kids these days have no manners?
Yes, maybe Peter was exaggerating just a tiny bit–– it’s not like Tony tormented him everyday or openly harassed him, but it’s the principle of it, see. In Peter’s mind, he only has one goal when it comes to Tony Stark, aka (surprisingly) straight A student, aka genius, playboy, billionaire, philanthropist most annoying boy on campus. 
And that goal: To put him in his place.
Peter can’t imagine what it’ll be like for the student when he gets to senior year in just half a semester–– in fact, even the very thought of Tony treating any of his teachers this way (or anyone) sends the assistant professor’s matchbox heart into insistent, restless flames.
(He chalks it up to just pure concern for his student.)Not jealousy.
Peter even writes up a list between inputting scantron grades, of why exactly he hates Tony’s guts.
Eloquently, he titles it, ❌ Tony Stark ❌.
1. Taller than me by an inch 1.5 cm.
2. Somehow knows my favourite breakfast from panera bread.
3. Always borrows notes from other people when he’s absent EVEN THOUGH HE KNOWS I HAVE COPIES BY MY DESK!
4. Wears those stupid glasses all the time.
5. Spends an average of 6 minutes after class just cleaning up, making me WAIT
6. Never pays attention in class but always sets the curves on tests.
7. Always flirts with other people outside the hall before class. (distracting!)
8.
On the eighth, Peter’s mind draws a blank. He’d thought that he could go on and on when given the chance, but maybe now isn’t the time- after all, he does only have 2 braincells left after mindlessly typing in scores.
It’s about 5:43 pm now, which probably means he should go after entering this last girl’s score and-
Done. Rarely do other professors ever stay this late, but Peter isn’t really in the mood to stick around and see. He grabs his trusty bullet journal- the one he proudly spent 2 and a half hours on in the beginning on the year, and also the one he just slandered Tony in, which, speaking of the devil-Shitshitshit, avoid him before he annoys you, Pete. It turns out his stiff, minecraft esque speedwalking in the other direction still isn’t enough to deter Tony, who looks up from his phone and calls out a nonchalant, “Hey, Mr. Parker!” Peteralmost scoffs at the sheer level of disrespect in that one line- how dare he? Who does he think he is?! At least, that’s what he sputters mentally.
Physically, the brunet is ready to embrace a thousand year nap. 
Peter mentally debates whether or not to stop and give Tony the time of day, his aforementioned 2 brain cells bantering back and forth before, eventually, Tony just decides he will have a conversation with Peter, whether he likes it or not. “Hey, earth to Mister,” Tony says, suddenly in front of his face, dangerously close. 
“Hi, Tony. You do know my first name isn’t mister, right? And you should be calling me Professor.” Peter says, voice scolding. “Okay, then, professor,” Tony says, though Peter knows he won’t really listen to him, “What’re you doing so late? Isn’t it past your bedtime? You need sleep to grow taller.”Well- okay, this is getting ridiculous. 
“That’s no way you should be talking to your elders, much less your lecturer, Tony,” Peter reprimands, starting to walk again. Hopefully, he’ll be left alone now.Unsurprisingly, and to Peter’s horror, Tony only starts striding backwards easily, as if he’d grown up learning how to walk that way. “But you’re so young. You barely look like my elder, much less a teacher,” Tony’s eyes flicker down, then drag back up, and Peter tries not to flush at this. “That’s not to say you don’t look good, though, the opposite, really.”
Peter only scoffs at this, round eyes rolling in disbelief, a warm tinge to his cheeks to top it all off. He stops abruptly, ego puffing just a bit when Tony stumbles.
“Actually, why don’t we talk about that, Tony?” He stops just to mentally imprint Tony’s somewhat panicked expression, before continuing with an adamant, “I’ve seen the way you act in class- the way you look at me,” which sounds much more scandalous than it should be.
Peter’s voice lowers to a hush, registering that they’re still in a school building, where anyone could be listening. Trust no one, not even yourself. 
“It’s not appropriate. I’m not some romantic interest for you to try to indulge in, and I’d much rather you put some of that attention to the lecture’s material instead.”
A moment passes by, then two, and Peter is still staring Tony straight in the eyes, his own hard with determination, brows furrowed. 
After a pregnant pause, the student clears his throat. 
“Do you wanna be?”
“Excuse me?”
“I mean, yeah, you’re cute professor,” Tony admits shamelessly, “Why don’t you just give me a bit of a chance? I’m not that bad, I’m actually very great.”“That’s exactly what a bad person would say,” Peter points out.
“Let me prove that I’m not, then,” Tony says. Then, his phone dings, “Well, I have to go. But I mean it, mister! Bye,” And with that, Tony bids him goodbye with a wave and a blown kiss.
Peter shudders.
Yuck.
-
What is not so yuck, though, is the next morning, is when Peter gets in at approximately 8:30 am. There’s a still toasty croissant on his desk, with a orange post it note.  
Hope you enjoy this. I was late bc i was picking it up so i just decided to skip for the whole day- TS
Peter, infuriatingly, knows exactly who wrote the note, and couldn’t resist the urge to roll his eyes. He’d been doing that alot lately.‘Late picking it up so he just decided to skip the whole day over a croissant, are you kidding me,’ Peter doesn’t bother actually protesting against the innocent pastry, though, instead setting his bag down and taking it out of the pastry bag. He recognises the label- it’s from the campus coffee shop. Tony was late to class picking up food from an establishment on campus. 
The kid’s gotta have a demerit, or something, because that might be going just a little too far, even for him. It’s like being late to a party you’re already at, but leave it to Tony Stark to somehow find a way. 
Well, that’s too bad. There was suddenly going to be a pop quiz today. 
-
Peter, later, finds that he has to reach deep inside himself to not literally slap the living shit out of Tony’s face when the boy opens the door to his lecture hall as the professor is packing up later that day.
“So you are here,” is what he says instead, eyes narrowed accusingly. He still doesn’t get why Peter doesn’t just come to class if he’s already there- are his lessons really that bad?  
“Indeed I am,” is the answer that comes, infuriatingly nonchalant. “Miss me?” 
“Never,” He huffs, slinging his bag over his shoulder. 
“Did you at least like the breakfast I got you?”
Hell yes.“No. What would be better, Stark, is if you actually attended class while you were on campus.” Then, he adds in without thought, “Especially mine.”There’s a beat of silence, the words not quite sinking in for the professor yet- it’s a different story for Tony, though. “Especially yours?” Tony asks with a grin, and the tone in his voice makes Peter immediately regret whatever he said to induce said piece of shit’s intonation.“Yes. Is there a problem?” One strong brow raises in inquiry. 
“Not at all,” Tony’s stupid smile only widens, “The opposite, really.”
39 notes · View notes
Text
Suspiria remake review from a shitty movie-goer
(this review is posted too late so excuse me for some timing inaccuracies I couldn’t be arsed to edit)
(IF YOU HATE TL;DRS JUST SKIP AHEAD TO THE “THE REVIEW” PART. YOU’RE WELCOME)
I actually hate to admit why was I interested to watch this movie in the end, but for once SOMETHING motivated me to go to a movie after countless tries from my family to get me to watch something in theatres at a “reasonable time” (daytime is what they mean, this movie was at 8pm our time, and this is when the cross-city bus transport (it goes from one big city to another) stops doing their service lmao).
I myself have a lowkey interest in moviemaking (I’m already getting there by editing my phone-recorded videos because whatever). I come up with my concepts in my head and I am mostly willing to put them down somewhere in my computer so I don’t forget it years later if I want to make that concept a thing in the end (because none of my concepts are finalized... well except for one short horror-ish story I posted on DeviantArt (see mom, I do like some horror stuff!). Reddit as of lately inspired me to edit some of my movie’s plot-lines based on irl events (not related with anything too SJW), and I’m not sure how an usual movie-goer would see this concept but I am going to try to execute it... whenever I have enough equipment to shoot my own little films or skits or whatever.
What’s that? There are people who scrolled past this and already yell at me that “YOU ONLY WENT TO SEE THIS MOVIE BECAUSE OF THE MAN WHO COMPOSED THE SOUNDTRACK~~~”? Ugh yes you exposed me, tea all over. I even had “Street Spirit (Fade Out)” on a bit of a repeat as of lately (how fucking come I wasn’t too couragerous to listen to this song before?? And “Pyramid Song”??? Man am I discovering their pearl(ie)s(*) too late). And I’m occasionally on the band’s subreddit as well. And the man himself is touring ‘round the USA, signing material of fans and have genuinely warm chats with them. Admireable.
But that’s only half truth.
I never thought I’d see Suspiria on cinema theatres in here. Until one time when I saw an ad on a completely random Lithuanian website that said this movie is coming to our theatres 14 December... I couldn’t quite believe my eyes. I made my goal to see Suspiria since then. I even dared to ask a couple of my new college ‘friends’ to see it with me, but one of them fell off the deal when I revealed that I’ll be going to see it on Saturday, and on the weekends he’s usually at home, far away from the city the college is in (he lives in college dormitory on mostly the work-weekdays). So my only movie companion ended up to be this 28-year-old coursemate (actually we both study different things but sometimes we attend some of the same lectures) who was intrigued by the Suspiria trailer herself so at least I’m gonna have her by my side of the movie, so I thought. Sweet.
I already envisioned seeing this in a mall cinema theatre but my companion offered me a cheaper alternative - her suggested cinema theatre was actually in renovation so the business is temporarily happening inside an actual drama theatre’s long theatre hall. I had to wait long until the ticket box opened and because of that I was lowkey frustrated as I finished my English test writing a little earlier, so I spent my time walking around the city until the time came and I wandered off to the old building of the cinema so then I remembered it was moved and I found the moved place. Yeah I bought the tickets before my companion could but I’ll skip ahead to the time that I almost lost the tickets because they were put down on a windowsill outside some children activity centre (Suspiria and children?? lol). I came back home late at night and was ready for the movie to happen the next day. Oh and before buying the tickets I coincidentally saw dance classes going on nearby that building... weird, as Suspiria has dance elements in there
The day came (December 15) and my family went together with me because they saw this as an opportunity to see the Christmas tree of our city (but not the movie). Needless to say, they were still visibly pissed at me orchestrating this idea, as I planned everything BUT the transport to go by. Well at least my mom and my sis. Dad was cool with it as he returned home to watch Home Alone. Aside all that, the cinema hall was cozy, Christmassy, not too small, there were a few trailers before the movie, no snack-seller places (as this is not a mall lol) - my companion was glad she wasn't at the mall as she found this place where we were at way lovelier.
Now with all that unnecessary long intro off my chest, let’s begin:
THE REVIEW
(definitely not spoiler-free, if you are sensitive to spoilers please watch the movie for yourselves before reading my review. But if you like being spoiled, I’m your friend then I guess lmao)
The intro to the movie felt like I ended up booking a wrong movie - I didn't expect that to be set somewhere in Germany, especially an American/Italian-shot one. Was that a thing in the original Suspiria? I don't know... (apparently it is, but the cities are different, never the country though)
Patricia (I didn’t know it was Chloë Grace’s role until reading the Wiki) looked like to be a really big deal here, with the dance pupils discussing her disappearance the other day and Susie overheard them, then Sara mentioned the Patricia thing to Susie after Susie revealed she was kind of chosen as the lead dancer for the Volk play... is it because Patricia was THE saviour that unfortunately knew a little too much?? Idk, it’s perhaps the reason we get to see the Klemperer guy subplot happen (I didn’t know it was Tilda Swinton behind him all the time either, must be because the way the male German accent was put on her lol). Turned out she was captured and kept under some dungeon where Sara had gone later in the movie, but looking like an almost melted and grotesquely old human being (or if Mary’s mother from “Chocolate with Nuts” was a person). Speaking of which, there is one more later in the movie, but I won’t tell just yet - we will need to get into such scenes discussion first.
Interesting deaths here, despite of them being grotesque and horrifically detailed. It almost felt like Susie, whilst doing her first dance as the probable lead dancer, temporarily turned into Olga’s voodoo doll or a violent bloodbender (that old lady from Avatar that could bloodbend was incredibly uncanny, damn) and left Olga completely fucked up, and the foam mouth later on... is this the effect myxomatosis has on a human being if it was ever humanly? She was twitching and salivating afterall. :P But no, she’s not dead until she gets to plead her death later in the movie! :O Several others occur throughout, but none is more prominent than this key scene I described, well at least according to TV Tropes.
The search for the evil person in this movie without Wiki helping me much was definitely a nice game for me to play. I kept thinking that Blanc might be that one, then I thought she’s not the one until she looked at Carolina (I think that was the tall tomboy’s name??) suspiciously and then she later passed out on the floor violently, with rabies foam and everything.
Anyway, don’t tell me Tilda Swinton wouldn’t make out a pretty good Thom Yorke post-Pablo Honey. She’s 8 years older than him, ffs! Also played a man before (e.g.: this movie I’m talking about) so the make up won’t be an unjumpable-over hurdle.
The sighs were for sure unsettling, especially because they oddly sounded like orgasm here and there. IDK why. I know fucking is referenced twice in this movie (well only fucking once and sex another time). Speaking of random things, the nightmare shots were completely random themselves, following up with some imagery we never see in the movie again, and some of that we see only a little (like the worms and bloody organs).
3 long scenes that were note-worthy for me. One is the Olga mutilation/Susie's first dancing scene that I already noted, and it was driven by music (the others will be too. Soundtrack of this movie still rules). Then there's the Volk play itself - girls go from one place to another, take poses of each other, dance individually, let their minimalistic red rope dresses flick in the air, interspersed with Sara in the underneath area and her broken leg (so broken, the bone went out of her skin!), and then the matriarchy getting her back on stage, but healing her leg with her witch powers before that. I haven't really listened to the rest of the soundtrack but I gotta check the song out so that I won't end up labeling it as a Kid A reject. No but seriously - intense dancing needed some intense drumming and painful instrument sounds just to project out the massiveness of the whole play.
Then I keep remembering the scene where Madame Blanc commands Susie to jump higher and higher in the mirror hall, up until she jumps as highest as possible. Also my companion’s favourite scene was the stare exchange between these two ladies during the part where people were singing some drinking song in a bar to celebrate ‘Volk’’s success - you hear them singing and then some chilling background noise slowly mixing and creeping its way into the atmosphere, then I think it leads into a scene where some sparkling aura entity wakes Susie up (and she’s nude) in the middle of the night and gets her to go down to this... dungeon orgy full of random stuff going on, complete with an Asian man doing something beyond explanation (I could say lewd but not quite), even more strange ritual dancing and the very much frightening Madame Helga... who looked like Jabba the Hutt for some reason. And then of course everyone slitting, slashing and twisting each other, and by the end Susie throwing us all a plot twist which makes her THE evil one who can finally let her ‘friends’ go of all that suffering they have been through thanks to the damn witches (and yeah apparently her dance friends haven’t completely died? THAT’S how they do - they tell Susie to end their suffering and she does). Also she cracks her chest open to reveal a... very graphic part of a female body that will by no doubt get this whole text review reported without consent so I refrain from any illustrations. Oh and this scene mostly has the possibly favourite this movie’s soundtrack song of mine, if not one of them, play - titled Unmade. It was a mind-boggling decision to do so but the movie editors do them I suppose, but still. I felt sad for the song having to be the background of such absurd but fair enough events? (Oh and I didn’t mention that everyone who voted for the other woman than Madame Blanc to be the leader of the witches (iirc) were rid of in this movie. Damn.)
Oh and the ending is rather an interesting detail, not talking about post-credits because as always I have to be this one movie goer who wants to do it but can’t because they’re urged to go back out of the movie theater. We turn into modern day Germany with a love heart carved on a brick wall with the letters A and L (perhaps?? at the time of finishing this review my memory towards it kind of erased some parts of the movie for me), a nice little remembrance of Lutz’s (the old man’s) love for his dear Anke, with which they have reunited during the movie, but Lutz was dragged out by some people related to the dance academy for probably wandering elsewhere than needed and somehow Lutz ended up as one of the sex dungeon victims, stripped of clothing and lying down quite powerless. That and before the modern day shot we are subjected with Lutz in hospital with Susie coming to visit, they discuss something related to the plot, Susie touches the guy speaks some more, leaves and according to the Wiki, Lutz “suffers from a violent seizure” that was nothing more than just a hard seizure. And it even erases his memories!
Anyway, as a whole, I felt more underwhelmed of this movie’s experience despite really wanting to see it. Like, “uhm yeah gore blood people getting slashed everyone’s a witch and everyone’s watched over by the witch and if you expose the witches you die” kind of underwhelmed. I didn’t want this movie to blatantly go through my head, but it did, that’s why I wanted to make notes everytime something notable happens. There was one startling moment, and it just was an innocent scene transition. And something within Olga’s mutilation scene made me chuckle (and made some other people leave the cinema hall ASAP). It’s more of a disgusting watch than scary. Also feels too dragged out in parts.
I’d only recommend it if you are gore-tolerant (there are people that can’t stand looking at blood so this might as well not be for you, especially if you’re younger than 16), like intense choreos that can impact other people literally, and... the soundtrack. Yes of course. If you dare to get through the movie with feeling its soundtrack, sometimes you might as well feel it right, but some of the soundtrack song usages might as well make you go “hmm” as much as me.
I'll remind myself to never watch a movie in theaters for soundtrack again (unless they're not THAT late). And the other 'trilogy of the three witches' movie remakes, especially if they come out at the time I haven't moved houses by now, because for sure as hell will my parents not like me going to cinema late once more. The movie is lowkey 7 out of 10 for me, can sometimes it's on the verge of falling down to 6 becaude of no completely proper comprehension of some directing choices... so 6.7/10 is good - as it still has 6 in it, but totally leans on to the 7.
Will probably watch it again. I need to remember some more of this movie sometime later. And looking for online uploads of this movie is unrecommendable - I'll wait until Lionsgate distributes it to America for wider audiences so that anything could surface 2 months (or even a few days) later from now. Though if I didn't need all that, I'd definitely not watch it again for a long time... unfortunately I want to.
Post movie feelings: my companion liked the movie, initially said to never watch it again but now wants to watch it again because it was so "wtf" she felt like re-experiencing it at some point. She liked the music (another bonus point for Yorke). She wished she could film the reactions of other people who watched this, as they mostly were confused, all being like "wtf did I just watch???". I'm already feeling bad for the 3rd companion who didn't join us but would also like to watch this - he’ll likely be one of those confused movie-goers.
1 note · View note
paradoxidolatry · 5 years
Text
Brotherly Love
@birdhole , @beatconductor a lil bit
TG: hey TG: sup
TT: Hey. TT: Not much.  Lunch break at work. TT: Sup?
TG: oh thats sweet TG: sucks theres no free pizza in it when you work as a cop huh TG: i guess its overall kind of a step up from the pizza gig tho
TT: Right? Free donuts though. TT: But nah, yeah, not so bad. TT: Didn't get a chance to tell you about it but I figure Dave or whoever's already spilled those beans. TT: Kinda weird, right?
TG: yeah dave told me TG: donuts just like a real cop huh TG: still cant quite wrap my head around this cop thing tbh TG: i can see you working as a LOT of things but a cop? thats wild
TT: Yeah. TT: I mean, I figured.  Got all that military experience, right? TT: But I didn't want to go back to the military. TT: Plus, working as a cop is an equal mix of 'keeps me active' and 'allows me to work around certain roadblocks in regards to the acquisitions business', so it was a good compromise. TT: Better than fast food and skin flicks again, at any rate.
TG: i mean i guess that makes logical sense n all TG: still fucking wild as shit to me TG: guess you can still wear a uniform even its obviously not as sweet as the fast food ones
TT: Yeah, I really miss that old greasy apron. TT: But what can you do?
TG: the grease just made your eyes pop in that special way ykno TG: chicks love it
TT: They fuckin do, don't they? TT: But somethin tells me you didn't message me to talk about the chicks missing my pizza funk.
TG: you sure about that? its a pretty great topic you could write a book on it become rich quick with your pick up tips
TT: Hey, I'm already on chapter 7: the Sausage Party. TT: But really though. TT: What's up, boss?
TG: nothing TG: i was just TG: thinking about you is all
> Heart, squeeze. TT: That right? TT: Cool, cool. TT: Was thinking about you earlier too, actually.
TG: oh? any reason or
[Dave txt @ bro] im watching u [Dave txt @ bro] > that chicken image
TT: Just, y'know. TT: Was outside on a smoke break and I saw a couple of pigeons hanging out, eating some sandwich or some shit on the sidewalk and like. TT: Got me thinking about you, and like. TT: I spent the past 13 years thing you're dead or some shit, and now you're alive and it's. TT: Just fuckin buck wild. TT: Pardon me for sound fucking sappy but it's kind of like a dream come true.
[TT > Dave: I'm behaving, dad.]
TG: ...am i a pigeon now? tho i do admit i would eat that floor sandwich(edited) TG: yeah its...its fucking wild huh? TG: kinda thought id never see you again even after TG:  i got away and shit TG: idk why not like you up and died but? after looking for you and you werent there i dunno i guess TG: i thought you just TG: werent going to come back TG: ...you didnt even see my wings yet you dont get to relate me to birds just yet dude
TT: I mean, I saw them in a picture. TT: One of you and Dave and a bunch of trolls and some old dude in front of a candy cane dildo? TT: But also you post about birds and shit all the time, so I figured that was sort of your Thing now. TT: And ... well.  I dunno. TT: Almost didn't. TT: I was just gonna stay on Earth, maybe pop in to visit every so often. TT: But then all that shit happened and Dave wasn't answering my messages, so I thought he was dead too, and...well. TT: I guess I'm, uh... grateful to the apocalypse for.  I guess bringing you back to me? TT: Well, no. TT: But like, at least letting me know you're alive.
TG: oh...yeah thats TG: thats my sisters actually and uh..shit what even is grig? grandpa i guess TG: already know mr d after all TG: i mean... im not sure how i feel yet TG: i guess im sorta glad because TG: i mean it has been my embarrassing dream to play family with you again for a while TG: i want to be a family again TG: a lot TG: its just TG: hard
TT: Sisters, huh?  Well damn, you got the whole family package with these folks, huh? TT: Nice.  How long you been with them? TT: Yeah, I figured. TT: I didn't, and don't, make it easy. I know. TT: A lot easier when you were a baby, even if our folks were shit, just cuz, y'know. TT: Everything hadn'tt happened yet. TT: Hadn't started to completely fuckin lose my mind and treat you like dogshit. TT: But I mean.  I dunno. TT: I'm not gonna force you or nothin. TT: But if you ever wanted to come backto the apartment and chill for a day, see how you feel about it? TT: That'd be uh. TT: That'd be really nice.
TG: 3 years TG: as long as ive been TG: away from scratch... TG: i..yeah i guess maybe TG: can you even handle seeing me get gay with dave tho
TT: God.  You were with Scratch that whole fuckin time? TT: Fuckin sonnuvabitch refused to tell me what he did with you. TT: Anyway. TT: Handling y'all and your homogay is a small price to pay at the end of the day. TT: Even if it's still. TT: Kinda really weird from my perspective. TT: But I respect y'all and he takes good care of you, so I can't complain too much, right?
TG: ...yeah like ten years TG: kinda fucked up huh TG: ill..ill think about it TG: okay so im gonna be real with you here for a sec okay TG: i TG: messaged you because i was talking to dave and i realized i missed you and TG: that i TG: kindawantahugiguess
TT: ...Yeah? TT: I can do a hug, yeah. TT: Where are you?  I can meet you, if you wanna.
TG: ...workin TG: at [coords] TG: dont arrest me mr officer these drugs are prescription
TT: I'll leave the cuffs in the car. TT: What happens off-duty stays off-duty, though, so. TT: See you in five.
TG: kay > Try not to freak out. Freak out anyways.
> Pull up by the curb a short walk away and park. > Look, you even pay for the parking meter and everything. > Step out of the car in your full uniform and approach Sock, one hand in  your pocket, the other raised in a wave hello.
> Oh god, he really fucking is a god damn cop. That's so damn weird. God. > Not as weird as randomly meeting up with him for a hug though. Damn it that was the dumbest idea. > You wave back, trying hard to look cool and not like you are dying on the inside and failing miserably.
> You stride up alongside him and... ...well, now what, actually. > Neither of you are very good at this kind of planning, are you. > Damnit, Striders. "Hey." > Now just to... > ... > Open your arms up? > Yeah.  That's how hugs happen.
> Oh god, he's going right for it.Oh god. Not even small talk or anything really bro? > Maybe that's better anyways because god know you don't know what to say. "Hey." > You take a deep breath and you...Go for the fucking hug. Squeeze that big bro tight.
> Aww shit here it comes and here he is.  All up and hugging you. > Actually, that's uh. > That's real nice. > You wrap your arms around him and pull him in for a good, tight hug. > It's probably not the most comfortable thing, what with your radio strapped onto your chest and name plates aand shit, but. > At least for you?  This is a fucking good hug. > (Don't you dare tear up in public.)
> You don't really care about the cofort level of this, it's something you've been craving for 13 years now, a little radio isn't going to stop you from enjoying it. > It's nice. It's familiar, like all the good parts of Bro you've been missing wrapped up for you in one big huggable form. Easy to forget all the shit for a moment. > But the moment does end and when you pull away you have to wipe at you eyes like an idiot. "Uh...Th-thanks."
> Aww, shit goddamn.  He's teaaring up too under those glasses. > You swipe one knuckle under your shades, and you take a steaadying breath. "Hey, yeah, no problem." > Breathe easy, Strider.  You glance up for a moment as you see a fatass snowflake come drifting down, then you look to Sock again. "Hey, you wanna maybe grab some lunch with me?  Haven't eaten yet and it's still my break, so."
> Well at least you are both sappy motherfuckers now. > Oh. You didn't expect that. You think about what Dave told you earlier "Stay in control" and promptly decide to fuck that advice because shit. You are already here. You already went for it like an idiot. "Yeah sure. Gonna have Donuts like a proper cop?" > You make such a face at the snow. Ugh, you didn't really prepare for that kinda weather, fuck.
> You snort a laugh and give your flat stomach a pat. "Gotta work on that signature cop gut, don't I? C'mon." > You gesture behind you with a jerk of your thumb. "Hop in up front.  You can pick the place."
"Hell yeah you do. You look like a fake ass striper cop dude." > You get into the car and immediately get the seatbelt. Doesn't feel safe otherwise. You don't really like cars still but you can't pin point why. It's just a weird personality quirk yeah? But you are used to being in one at this point of your life. > Just drive carefully. Please.
> You hop in and buckle up too, both pleased and a litttle saddened that you didn't even need to remind Sock to put on his seatbelt. > Poor kid. > Luckily, you are an impeccably safe driver, and the drive to Wherever is smooth and uneventful.
> Old habits die hard. > You feel kind of awkward in the car with him, it's too silent for our tastes. > You get out of the car at whatever this amazing food place he's taking you is. Fingers crossed for fast food- "Y'know kinda funny. Always figured my first frive in a cop car would be because I'm getting arrested."
> You snort a laugh.  It's Sock's old favorite pizza place. > God you hope he still likes this shit. > Also this wasn't a Pizza Pimp before, was it?  It was Gino's-- > Wait. > Ugh, well, maybe Dave's not at work. "If you're planning on getting arrested, you're doing this pushing thing wrong, kid."(edited)
> Oh the Pizza Pimp. Fucking score. Maybe Dave is there, that would be rad. "I didn't say I was, I said I didn't think I'd ride a cop car otherwise. Your hearing getting bad?" > You immediately freeze after saying that. Oh man, actually sassing Bro though? Please don't hit me.
> Dave is unfortunately not there, but he sure would love to.
> You catch that freeze, and you... > You snort a little, before pointing to your ears. "Too many concerts and phat-ass beats.  Knew I shouldn't have gotten all up and personal with those speakers.  Who knew the grown-ups were right about that?" > You smile, and it's a little awkward cuz you sure as hell have never been the smiling type, before you hold open the door for him. "C'mon, before we freeze our asses off."
> Oh. Okay. It's cool. It's chill. In a quite literal sense even so you get your silly ass inside. > A smile though? You haven't seen your brother smile in...far longer than you haven't seen him for sure. > That little scare knocked the speech right out of you though so you just awkwardly sit down at the next best table, suddenly really not sure how good of an idea this was.
> You take a seat opposite him, and when the server approaches, you order yourself a water instead of a soda. > Who are you, even. > You glance over the menu, humming softly.  Some of these item names... fitting for a place called Pizza Pimp. "You wanna split one, or do individuals, or?"
> Who is he indeed. You order a black coffee instead of apple juice though, so maybe the traditional Strider beverages are just staying outside today. "Uhhh..Not super hungry honestly I don't mind sharing one." > You haven't been able to eat a whole pizza at once in a while but you don't say that.
"Alright.  We'll split a medium and you can take the rest home if you want." > You let him pick the toppings too.  This really is a strange Strider day.
> The strangest. Do they have nuggets as topping because you want that.
> They might have like, baked chicken, which is kinda like nuggets and also? Is Carro-approved.
> Do you think the pizza pimp doesn't have a nugget topping what kinda fool do you take Dave for.
> A big one. >:3
> LISTEN Nuggets have been added like at least two months ago. Cock Special.
> Goddamnit, Dave.
> Sock loves Dave and the Cock Special Pizza. Prepare ya taste buds Bro.(edited)
"One Cock Special with extra cock please" > Yes, this is exactly how you order.
> Oh your face. > You're so fucking proud.  Dave sure is your little brother, and so too is Sock. > Bless these fucking kids.
"Hope you like it, it's my fav." > Both the pizza and you know.
> Yeah.  Yeah, you know. "Sure I will." > Snort a laugh. "This sure isn't Gino's anymore, huh.  You remember that place?"
"Oh yeah. Man..That's been a while. Clover gifted the place to Dave what? 2 years ago?" > Back when you were on a no homo basis. Memories.
> [Clover: nya face]
"Used to be your favorite, but maybe that's because it was free when I worked here. ...Clover?"
"I'm always a slut for free food but I still digged their shit later. Oh uh..Yeah. Little green guy? 4 of the Felt?" > Should..You now have mentioned that?
> [Dave] Oh no.
> There's this shift in your face.  It's not a frown, but a certain tightening of your lips as you're hit with the full brunt of what Sock just said. "...Dave's...doing business with the Felt?"
> WHOOPSIES >Oh. Oh, oh, oh shit. You fucked up. You didn't really think about that when you said it. At all. Shit. Fuck. Damn. "Hahaha whaaaat? Noooo. Of course not! He'd never uh...Clover is just y'know his uh... Sugar daddy yeah. Cash money man, can't say no to that even from a greenie right?" > Well it's not entirely a lie. You are sweating though.
> You paw at your face and you sit back in your seat, eyebrows knit together tightly. > Looks like you're going to have to have a little talk with Dave when you get home. "...No, guess not.  Desperate times and all that, right?"
"Yeah exactly! Haha..." > God this is uncomfortable. You are going to warn Dave but you already feel like shit. Fuck. "Don't...Don't hurt him okay?" > There's fear in your eyes now. Not for you but for your boyfriend, which is so much worse in your eyes.
> That snaps you Right out of your bad thought spiral and you quickly wave your hand. "Hey, no, no.  Not gonna hurt him.  It's chill." > There's that smile again, even if it's uneasy and a bit green around the gills.  Your brother and the Felt... "Really.  Just surprised he hadn't mentioned it before now."
> [Dave] GUESS WHY.
" 'kay..." > He probably hadn't mentioned it for a reason. You couldn't have known Dave wasn't supposed to do business with the Felt but you still feel like shit. It makes sense in hindsight and considering your history of course but...You just plain didn't know. > The Pizza arrives but you suddenly don't feel very hungry at all, sipping on you coffee awkwardly instead.
> You're, similarly, not hungry, but you've got to salvage this.  Not telling when or if Sock will agree to see you again after this. "Sorry, I just... Y'know, getting offered a gift by those guys.  If they had snatched Dave too..." > You shake your head, and sigh it off.  Out with the bad. "But they didn't, and that's that.  So." > You take up a slice of the pizza and you point is casually at Sock, an eyebrow quirked. "What're you out there peddling?"
> Oh. You'd really rather not follow that line of thought, yeah.  Smooth topic change. "Dude, don't think I should be discussing that with a cop in a pizzeria. Mr D would murder me man."
"Hey." > You make a show of taking off your badge and laying it upside down on the table. "Off-duty, not a cop.  So is it the good shit, or is it like, oregano in a dimebag being passed off as weed."
"We're still in public man." > And you don't want to piss off your Dad on top of the shit you just pulled.
"Yeah, yeah.  Weren't you in public anyway?" > You chuckle a little and you point toward the kitchen area. "Your big bro used to sell shitty dimebags out of there, way back.  Dealt to all the line cooks."
" Course you did." > You roll your eyes behind your shades. "What you want an inventory list? Okay I'll just tell you my favorite product aight? Kinder Überraschungseier......The surprise is Cocaine." > Huh, sure did slip into your mother tongue there. Welp..
> Okay.  You actually laugh then. "You're selling Kinder Überraschungseier full of Cocaine.  Shut the fuck up, seriously?" > You're nodding approvingly now. "That's a fucking great idea.  Where the fuck'd you get the chocolates, though? Make them yourself?"
> That makes you feel..really proud? Huh. You can't stop the big dorky grin from spreading on your face. "Best idea I ever had, honestly. I'm importing them from earth, duh. Along with a bunch of other banned sweets and shit. Who the fuck thought peeps are illegal anyways?"
> You balk at that and you laugh again. "Peeps are illegal here-- wait, shit, right." > Smack your forehead. "That's my job to know that now.  Wow, fuckin fire me now."
"Maybe I should show you my stock, just as a reminder. A fucking lot of dumb shit is. Fucking Lattes were banned man. Until the King unbanned them just for Jude which is honestly so fucking stupid. Way to play favorite, just like royalty should am I right? Not that I'm complaining, love me a big fat Latte." > Man it's...Nice to be able to make that kind of shit tier level german dick joke and to know you're gonna be understood just fine.
> You snort your water and you pull a face,but you're clearly goofing around a loving it. "Fucking nasty, dude.  I don't need to hear about your love of big hot fuckin Lattes."
"Aren't you glad the prospitian monarchy digs a steaming hot Latte too? What a life that would be otherwise." > You snort yourself.
"Jesus christ.  Fuckin whities, dude." > You stuff some pizza in your mouth and you talk withyour mouth full like the fat nasty trash you are. "Can you believe I have to work with them?  Like what the fuck."
"The Queen gives me the creeps with her I love everyone bull. And the King seems like a huge fucking idiot so...Congrats man. Jackpot."
"Not had the chance to meet either, but this is the closest I've gotten to infiltrating the corrupt government yet.  Maybe if I keep my shit up, I can finally overthrow them from the inside." > You are entirely dead seriouus.
"What's the masterplan? Shoot them in public?" > You aren't but you also don't mind the topic. Not a fan of these guys.
"Nah, nah, nothing like that.  Too messy.  Besides." > You gesture at the scar that runs oveer your eyes. "Never been a fan of guns."
"I know." > Hell maybe you should be grateful he ain't. Swords fucked you over bad enough. "Seems like a popular approach is all. Like historically or whatever. But I guess you gotta go for something less stale huh?"
"Of course.  Flashy's the only way to be when you're taking out a corrupt system of government."
"Looking forwards to the show Bro." > Except you hope he's fucking joking.
> You totally fucking aren't. > You toss him a wink, which of course he can't see all that well behind your shades. "Hope it's a good one.  You gonna eat any pizza, lil bro?"
"Oh, right." > You finally grab a piece too. "How's the Cock Special?"
> Stuff the rest of your piece into your mouth and brush the crumbs off of your fingers. "It's not big hot Latte, but it's nice and tasty all up in my mouth, so it'll do."
"I mean we can grab a Latte next time-" > Did you just say next time. Did you just imply you want to meet up like this again? Shit. > Stuff your mouth with Pizza real quick.
> Oh. > Oh... That makes yourr heart do the smiley emote. > You grin a liittle bit about that and you say, voice kinda soft, "Yeah... alright.  I'd like that."
"Me too...I think." > If you don't hurt my boyfriend tonight that is, is what you think.
> Don't you worry, Sock.  Not gonna hurt your boyfriend tonight. > You're not gonna be home, so Dave gets to go unhurt for another night.
> Or any other night Bro.(edited) > Or day, or ever:
> Well, at least you'll try to keep your cool when you talk to Dave about it later.
> That's a good start.
> Fuck yeah.  Before you all finish up here, you nod back to the streets now lightly coat with snow. "You going back to your corner, right?  You need a jacket?"
"I mean, I'll live..." > But it's pretty obvious that you don't have any especially warm clothes on you, you know like an idiot.
"Yeah, and you'll get sick, doofus." > You shrug off your jacket--it's a plain black windbreaker, while you wait for your city issue polcie jacket to come in--and you ball it up, handing it over to him. "Here."
> You open your mouth to respond but the Jacket is already in your hands. Oh. That's..Oh. > Is that what it's like to have a caring older brother? "Thanks..." > The Jacket is far too big for you and smells like Bro. It's a weird feeling to put it on. Like a hug you can wear. > Your heart is doing several emotions.
"Hey, no sweat. No good to go out there to work if you're just gonna freeze to death, yeah?" > You have the server bring you all a box for the leftovers, and you give those to him, too. > You stand from the stand and stretch. "Alright, my lunch is about over.  You ready to go?
"Uh, yeah." > You are still trying to sort your feelings over all of this. It's weird. It's nice. > It's what you wanted all along. > Except for the part where you are scared about Dave. > You get up too feeling like a huge fool.
> You, very very carefully, put your hand on his back and lead him out back into the cold. > Look to him, then to your car. "Back to tthe same corner? Or you got anywhere else you need to be?"
> You tense up just a little at the touch but let it happen anyways. "Y-yeah same place." > You just get into the car quickly to cut off the awkward moment. Not without putting on your seatbelt of course.
> Always seatbelt first, kid! > You buckle in and drive him back to the street corner you found him on, putting the car into park but not getting out. "Alright.  Don't get into any trouble, alright?  Oh, and patrol comes past here in about 30 minutes, so be cool when they pass, yeah?"
"Oh uh..Okay. See you, I guess." > You wave an awkward goodbye, overwhelmed by a lot of conflicting emotions.
> You're about to drive off, but then you open the door and, hanging halfway out, you call to him, "Hey! Love you, Sock."
> That just leaves you starring for a moment. Did he just-? Does he? What. Can not compute. "L-Love you too Bro..." > You are not sure if he heard that with the way you mumbled that. You are not sure if you want him to or not. > It's only getting weirder. > But it also warms your birdy little heart.
> You heard it--you've actually got pretty good hearing still, despite all tthatt music and shit. > You smile and wave again before ducking back into your car and driving off.
> The patrol driving by half an hour later doesn't find a drug dealer, just a crying kid in some back alley. > This absolutely kills the bird.
3 notes · View notes
pinkwatchblueshoes · 6 years
Text
Garvez Fluff
Just a little quick fluff that I desperately need to see but wont. Margaritas and Mix Ups Penelope Garcia told herself not again. After an intense but platonic relationship with her best friend Derek Morgan, she knew she couldnt care so deeply for another person when they could, and eventually would, just up leave her. Penelope often beat herself up for feeling this way because she loved Savannah and little Hank but her heart could only take so much after all the losses the team had gone through. She already had enough worry for her family and team as is. Newbie was trying his hardest to chip away at her "fluffy armor" as he called it. What killed Garcia was that she found everything he tried so endearing but she always stopped herself before she got in over her head. On top of everything SSA Luke Alvez was another gorgeous strong superhero, just like Derek, yet totally different. His smile knocked her off kilter, but a man like that would never look at a woman like her she lamented. After a particularly hard case Garcia was staying late to finish paperwork so she could spend the entire weekend focused on de-stressing and relaxing, NOT thinking about the young women of this case. She was pulled away from her computer screen with a knock on her lair door. "Still here?" A familiar deep voice asked. "Obviously." She snarked back but Luke only smirked at the feisty blonde. "I would ask if I could join you but you'd just say no so I'll just take a seat anyway." Penelope only snorted knowing he was just as stubborn as she was. When she finally finished up and shut down her computer and its many screens she found him intensely studying one side of her office that held pictures of friends and family, even hand drawn pictures from Henry. Garcia could see the sadness behind his dark eyes. Was this case just as bad for him? Or was he missing someone, his family? The offer flew out of her mouth before she could stop herself. "Do you want to go get a drink?" Luke turned to her surprised. "Really? I-I would love that." "Good lets go." Penelope grabbed her purse and Luke followed closely to the elevators. As they descended to the garage level in the elevator Luke's stomach growled loudly. "I'm sorry about that." He said embarrassed. "Do you think we could go somewhere with food also?" "Soo needy Newbie." Penelope groaned but smiled letting him know she was kidding. Little did he know she was starving as well. "Well lucky for you I know a little Mexican joint with the best margaritas and they serve dinner late." When they arrived the hostess recognized Penelope right away. "Oh Miss Penny!! So good to see you. Your table is available." Penelope blushed. "Come here often?" Luke chuckled quietly. Once seated the server arrived right away. "Your usual Miss Penny? Peach Margarita and the veggie fajitas?" Penelope's face got even redder but nodded yes anyway. The server turned to Luke expectantly. "You know what? That sounds delicious. I'll have the same." Luke turned to see Penelope's shocked face. "Hey it must be good if you come here often and have a usual. I trust you." Penelope couldnt stop the warmth that the statement "I trust you" put through her, even if it was just a food choice. Plus she knew Luke ate meat and drank beer so he was going outside his comfort zone for her. "So how is miss Roxy?" Penelope started with a subject she loved. "She's good. I'm leaving her at the sitter's tonight since its so late. She misses you though. I swear she knows who the dog cookies are from when I give them to her." "Well as long as she enjoys them I'll keep making them." Penelope said with a smile. There was a silence but Luke was just smiling at her, then the food arrived breaking the moment. The conversation was surprisingly easy and comfortable for Penelope. She laughed hard when Luke told her about helping out a older neighbor with some chores who then came on to him. Being the nice guy Luke was he was stuck dodging her advances until all the chores were done. "I think I like Mrs. Corgin." "Of course you would. You'd love anyone who gave me a hard time." "True." The teasing was light and fun. Penelope appreciated his sense of humor. But what really touched her was when they accidentally got on the topic of work and this last case, he listened patiently as she described having to go through the victim's lives intimately to only see them dead in the crime scene photos feeling like a failure for not saving them. Luke reached over and held her hand as she wiped her tears with her other hand. "Its never easy when we lose victims but I know those women will be remembered because of you Garcia. You are the most caring person I know and the heart of the team. You keep us going time and time again." Penelope just stared at him with awe. After a few minutes she realized they were still holding hands and oddly she didnt want to let go. As it got later the pair reluctantly parted ways. She left him with a quick hug because if she held on longer she might not let go. Penelope spent the rest of the weekend replaying the night and actually looking forward to Monday morning. When she arrived at work she put down her purse and coat in her office and headed to the kitchen to get a cup of coffee. She saw Luke talking to JJ and Spencer but as she approached with a smile Luke's eyes grew wide. Even before Penelope could say good morning Luke mumbled gotta go and quickly left. Penelope visibly deflated but quickly recovered so JJ and Spencer wouldnt ask. The snuff hurt her more than she cared to admit. "How was your guys' weekend?" JJ told her about Henry's soccer game and Spencer rambled on about a new book he read and wrote a paper on for fun. Later that morning JJ visited Penelope in her office, she leaned against Penelope's desk and asked how she was. "Fine." "Uh huh." JJ wasnt convinced. "And how was your weekend? You left before I could ask." "Fine." "Okay spill." "Its nothing." "Its not nothing." "Oh yes it is. Clearly from Luke's reaction this morning, the completely meaningless dinner we had together was nothing." "Oh sweetheart." "Please dont oh sweetheart me JJ. I know. I know that I got my hopes up and I knew it was stupid to do so yet here I am again. A guy like that would never be interested in a girl like me. Dont worry JJ, I'll be fine." "You need to talk to Luke." Before Penelope could respond her computers and her phone chimed indicating a case. Penelope gave the team the details of the case. Prominent local figures were being kidnapped, killed, and left in public areas in Phoenix, Arizona. Penelope managed to ignore Luke, even when he asked a question she answered addressing the group rather than him. Prentiss closed the meeting with the traditional order of 'Wheels up in 30'. Penelope quickly headed back to her lair but with the high heels she was wearing Luke easily tracked her down. "Hey can I talk to you real quick?" "You're on limited time Newbie." She replied not looking him. "Garcia stop. Stop please." Luke gently put his hand on her elbow halting her. "Please listen. I want to apologize for this morning." "Why? Nothing happened." "Penelope look at me." Penelope did but showed no emotion except annoyance. "I, uh, well I just wanted to say." Luke stumbled over his words and rubbed the back of his neck. "Damnit I wanted to do this better." Penelope was now confused. "Luke its fine. You better get to the jet." "No its not fine. Let me explain. I ducked out this morning because you walked in on me talking to JJ and Spencer about our date." "Our date?" "Yeah well, no I mean it wasnt a date per se but I was wondering if we could go on one? Together I mean. A date." Penelope's confusion faded away to giddiness. She'd never seen Luke Alvez so inarticulate and it was because of her! "Are you asking me out, Newbie?" "Yes." Prentiss appeared down the hall. "Alvez, let's go." Luke looked bummed but moved towards the elevators. "Dont answer yet, just think about it." Penelope was sure she looked like a fish with her mouth gaping open. Later in the day after the team landed in Phoenix she got a text from JJ. -Told you. What are you going to say? -I'm so confused. -Why? Dont you like him? -Well yes but what was going on this morning? -Penelope you're a smart girl. He was embarrassed, nervous to talk to you. Now call him and tell him you'll go out with him when we get back. Even though Penelope had trouble believing that Luke Alvez was nervous around her she took JJ's advice, well sort of. She didnt call him, but he called her pertaining to the case. After she finished answering his questions about the victims' backgrounds she stopped him from hanging up. "Wait Luke." "What no newbie?" Luke chuckled nervously. "Were you serious?" "Very serious Penelope. Why do you think I've been trying so hard to get you to like me? I loved spending time with you just us Friday night. I have to admit I wish I wouldve been much more smoother with it all." Penelope finally let out a breath and laughed. "Well that was pretty bad." She teased. "Yes it was, but I'm glad you know now. Anyway I better get back to the team." "Hey Luke." "Yeah?" "I can't wait till you get back." Penelope couldnt contain her smile. "Is that a yes?" "See you soon Luke Alvez." "See you soon Penelope Garcia."
82 notes · View notes
ts-akhmim · 4 years
Text
Episode 14 (Finale) | “All of this and more, but only in Autumn's World” - Autumn
Tumblr media Tumblr media
So I figured out that Amir does have the idol and Jakey originally had it that round... damn I wish I looked a little more but I just didn't think Jakey had it. So that probably means that Autumn is going this round, and then I just need to find a way to win this next challenge over Amir. I know Kendall and I will vote together next round regardless, so worst case scenario next round for me is that I am in some kind of fire-making challenge, but I at least see there being a good chance that me and Kendall could be sitting in FTC together, and I'm just hoping at this point that it's Augusto sitting there with us. P.S. In the event that I make FTC... I really hope I'm not seen as a goat. Like, I don't think I am, but I'm not sure how much respect I'll get for my game. I'm hoping people see how savvy I had to be to continuously work my way back up after a couple blindsides and being pushed to the bottom, but you never know with this jury / cast. P.P.S. Please no pressure cooker next round. I'm not ready to have to beat Amir THAT way.
Tumblr media
So I'll count that as half of a success. I was at least able to help convince Amir to play the idol he told me about to flush that, and with Autumn safe, the next option was to do Adam. Knowing that if Autumn did have the merge idol, she probably wasn't playing it on Adam, this was the next best option. I need Kendall and Augusto around because those are the two I'd like to bring to FTC if I can make it there. It makes sense to take them to the end as our games are all very similar, so at least we aren't against a winner at the end. Part of me thinks that bringing Amir may not be the worst thing in the world given he has screwed over a decent bit of that jury, but also, I'd rather not take that risk.
Tumblr media
So now that that's done and I'm cute and immune, I can confirm it all. Yes I do have the merge idol, yes I've had it since Final 7 but planned not to play it until Final 5, and yes that makes me the most powerful person here. Deadass everyone wants my head on a stick and I don't give a single fuck. I'm chilling all weekend, letting them think they're doing something if/when I lose win immunity, and then I'm sending a man out on one vote Monday night. You think they hate me now? Wait til they find out they can't take a shot at me until Final 4 lmaaaaoo. Be blessed! 
youtube
Tumblr media
So Amir blames me for playing his idol... I think that's a win for me then, right?
Tumblr media
I'm so glad I was able to take this challenge win! I needed to win this to guarantee I wasn't some kind of contingency plan. But now, it's about how can I guarantee a winner goes home. I've already kind of told Autumn she was in trouble (literally 0 point in lying to her about it) and have explained to both Kendall and Augusto that we should find a way to split the votes / guarantee that Autumn and Amir have no shot of working with one another and sending home one of the two people I want with me at FTC. I feel so close, yet so far away from the title of Sole Tumblr Survivor. I want this win so badly. I can't describe how much I want this win. I didn't come back just to have fun; I didn't come back just for maybe an ounce of redemption from Guyana, I came to win this mother-effer. I have at least a 25% shot at the moment, but I want to increase that number. 
Tumblr media
Final 5... it's so insane honestly because I never expected this of myself but I've played my ASS off (literally, that's why I'm flatter than a table top) especially these past few rounds. I'm kinda shocked that the clear targets are Autumn/Amir/TJ just given I have been a force in the game (subtly ofc) so its def a gag... but yeah. TJ winning the immunity was WORST case scenario because I wanted to come for that man's neck SO bad but we'll just have to get him next time. Amir having the merge idol isn't a SHOCK but it was interesting to say the least like rip telling me that but both his idol plays are gonna be kinda useless which helps my case! I know that Autumn said me and Kendall have been up Amir's ass but first of all... i'm a bottom so I would never BUT also I feel I've held my own this entire game so it isn't my truth in the slightest but I'll just have to prove her, TJ, and the jurors wrong if I got to. I've gone from flop (16th in Bhutan, 17th in Great Lakes, 12th in Socotra) to the top (6th in Flops, 2nd in Seychelles) but I am trying to WIN and wear my deserved crown, it's time I won something yknow. 
Tumblr media
Amir and I when my plan worked and NEITHER of us walked into jury yet again https://twitter.com/abridrakegraham/status/1222552252357005313 The kids HURTIN yall and I will 100% respect their privacy at this time. Like they really thought!!! They really thought they finally killed me and were probably singing ding dong the witch is dead all day and now look at em. They done lost the boy they all wanted to go to the end with, got severely played by me, AND still gotta see my face everyday. Someone check on Jordan Pines I wanna make sure he's not still holding his breath waiting for my demise. And I've teamed up with his other least favorite person? HOES MAD. But it's not just him- Kendall ready to fight Amir in PM's, TJ in his feelings on call during tribal, Augusto couldn't even find the words he was that shocked. It's all so glorious and I truly fucking love wrecking everyone's games. Amir was like I've never felt these emotions before/ this is one of the wildest moves I've ever been apart of and tbh I agree with Amir. This was batshit crazy but you know what the gag is? This is literally just another day in the mind of Autumn Hill Jury mad, the mayos mad, Augusto mad, and I'm literally on top on the world right now. Like I love Augusto yes but that move was the definition of powerful. Like it's not just playing an idol correctly. It's the fact that Amir came to me begging that I forgive him and that we work together again, I then agreed and admitted to having the idol to A WHOLE ASS WINNER, convinced Amir to tell the kids he had the idol, got everyone to feel super comfortable around me all night and day cause I knew "I was going," snapped in the tribe chat at 2:00 because I "just wanted people to be honest about voting me," got the kids to essentially then tell on themselves since they listed all the reasons why they were voting me, and then idoled out their king using his once closest ally. Liiiikkkee?? STIFF WHERE?? DEAD WHERE??? Bitch I'm playing to win ok I hope yall enjoying this master class I've put on cause I'm hanging it up after this. Unless yall get serious about having a TS version of Winners at War, then call me. But otherwise, yes I'm going ham because I have every intention of walking into the 2 time winners chat. I WANT TO ASCEND!!! So PSA: if my funeral is public knowledge, that means I ain't dying hahaha. Apparently everyone has nicknames for me and that might actually be my favorite part. Jakey calling the game Autumn's World all merge to the boys and TJ only referring to me as the Godmother?? iconic! You know I'd hate me too if I wasn't me, which is why I'm flattered by it all. They know damn well they're almost out of time to get rid of me and they've spent the entire fucking game hoping and wishing and praying and still can't pull it off. And them not targeting me out the gate like Jordan wanted has gotten soooo many people killed. But most importantly I have successfully played an idol now TWICE at Final 5.. And I sure did win back to back immunities at Final 4 and Final 3 in Crossroads so finding out this season has a final 2? Perfect let me dust off the blueprint real quick
 https://twitter.com/rcgersnatalia/status/1168071613763342336
Tumblr media
okay im going to work my ass of to win this but autumn and tj have both claimed they can do this really well, so like basically, tj cannot win immunity, i need to win or i may be absolutely screwed https://66.media.tumblr.com/583667e85060a36a2cccb8551baa27d5/tumblr_inline_oh5slaYgdO1tr4u58_500.jpg but as of rn, i was going no matter what if i didnt win immunity, i tried to make a story to autumn and we called for like 3 hours and i did my damnest to sell that tj is the problem with everything that happened last round and that i was down to vote augusto for real until tj really sold the plan out to augusto and i didnt want to go to rocks, but i played the idol out of fear that augusto-kendall-tj would 3-2-1 me so she believed there is a true rift in the beauties right now and has more of a reason to hate tj she is so fucking smart so she may have sussed it out and went along with it, but im hoping it worked??? idek but she said if she wins immunity she'll idol me she did admit she has the idol to me but maybe because she knew i already knew
Tumblr media
I just... do I even have words anymore? Like, time and time again, I'm getting screwed over and I just... it's a good underdog story now. I just have to win this next challenge. I guess regardless I had to win this next challenge, but also, I was really hoping to not have to have as much concern as I do right now.
Tumblr media
What was that?? oh cause I thought the yts who can't successfully kill me had said something https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7Wux4HnZRY0 Another day, another body bag. THEY WERE SO SURE THEY HAD ME AHHHH I really have to laugh. Kendall was certain this was my funeral and I'm like nah baby it's yours. I'm still screaming that TJ would keep immunity for himself and let Kendall go to firemaking where she would 100% lose that's wild. Only for me to find out after that sis really was THE RAT??? Y'all set her up lmaaaooo. Now I really don't feel bad cause she ran from her karma long enough and if Amir had told me that shit before firemaking I really would've smoked her in the comp. Kendall had no business snitching to Jordan about an airtight unanimous vote and blowing up all her allies' games just to do right by an egom aniac. Then Jordan still died and she falls in love with his bestie boo TJ (he's playing you sis!!) who sensed she could die this round but didn't give a single fuck?? Absolute mess. She really got Devon, TJ, Amir, and Augusto to lie about it the whole game and they agreed because they knew if I ever find out the truth, I'd kill her on sight. Bitch I killed her anyway!!! So was it even worth it? Cause she still walked into jury but she got a better placement and a noble death, which miss Devon and Augusto cannot say. Too busy being lying https://media3.giphy.com/media/6DMfLQEhixGdW/source.gif I feel so affirmed though- every person who has come for me is either sitting in jury or is about to walk in. That's power- that's RANGE! Also I just wanna say to Devon while I'm here:  you really gave me all that grief for considering you could be the rat when you, Amir, and Augusto were in on it and protecting Kendall the whole time??? Fuck outta here. Like whose fault is it really that you died Devon? I wanna know. You mad at me and Amir when you need to be mad at yourself for picking the wrong girl, which is on brand for straight white men but y'all not ready to have that conversation. Anyway! Kendall trying to undermine me the ENTIRE merge and using all these men to do it only to still get killed by me in the end?? Fucking love that shit. All of this and more, but only in Autumn's World
Tumblr media
https://66.media.tumblr.com/143402720bb2766ebe14eb1d657e2ca6/tumblr_inline_o8662rxDt11tr4u58_250.gifv
Tumblr media
Me before the challenge https://peopletalk.ru/wp-content/uploads/2016/09/tumblr_n49eidw5Zk1rsrbdko1_500.gif 
Me after I went beast mode and embarrassed the men https://twitter.com/intoragnarok/status/1233477557565173762
I'm screaming at Amir asking me after if kept him strategically or out of loyalty and I'm like sis what do you think. I was not about to let the white knights get their way and give TJ the win all because he's a good car salesman. Like y'all should've seen that 1 hr plus discussion of TJ and Amir going back and forth on camera about who I have a better chance of beating and I'm just sitting there IMMUNE taking notes, knowing neither of them wanted this. The power that that has, the intelligence that that has, the clearance that that has, the access that that has. Amir and TJ planning to kill me and then being thwarted once again is arguably my two favorite storylines. TJ wanted to do this the ENTIRE MERGE and I never let him succeed. And Amir wanted to be the one to say he killed me cause he's Mr. Smith when I'm Mrs. Smith and my ass spared him and helped him several times. Now look at em, getting third and second. I made a joke at Final 5 that Amir and I are the movie Mr. and Mrs. Smith and it's so true. I adore him as a person and I know he loves me too but we're not above killing each other. Hell we genuinely want to kill each other but time and time again we chose to kill everyone else instead lmao. 
So please enjoy this visual walkthrough of our wild ass partnership
(when we met at merge) https://i.pinimg.com/originals/3f/48/5e/3f485e53a56fb43c62c22c0790e8afd7.gif 
 (when we voted together at Final 11 and Final 10) https://media1.giphy.com/media/l3Ucho9gtq4b7SLok/source.gif 
 (when I caught Amir in a lie and killed Devon as retaliation but still wanted to work with Amir) https://media0.giphy.com/media/l3UcotueAJQAW0zjW/source.gif 
(when Amir killed Ali and Adam to piss me off) https://66.media.tumblr.com/eebc1dc0a509a652ea543aba82bcb1c5/tumblr_ojjk22iVXM1uhcmrao1_250.gifv 
(when Amir tried to get back in my good graces at Final 5) https://66.media.tumblr.com/3b157a36601820370897ace6673af493/tumblr_n17egq7Hdq1r7fawxo4_r3_250.gifv 
(when I agreed to the winners pact and got him to kill Augusto and Kendall with me) https://thumbs.gfycat.com/DefiniteVapidDogwoodtwigborer-size_restricted.gif 
 (when he kept trying me at Final 4 and Final 3/ saying he'd kill me) https://i.gifer.com/3lie.gif 
(when I snapped and took Amir to Final 2, like I said I would, and we both knew he'd lose beside me) https://66.media.tumblr.com/d1f3506fc873a7d2393d705a7f58065d/tumblr_mgooqovRHw1qkdoj2o1_500.gif
Tumblr media
mood after everything that's happened and me making FTC again- we out here. Coming out of retirement has been good to me https://twitter.com/emrific/status/1235072497055227907
Tumblr media
(final 4) oh dear me this one is a tuffyyyy wuffyyy.... okay okay. so its f4, tj thinks im voting with him and kendall to vote autumn. Autumn thinks im voting with her against kendall to make it firemaking. basically, i was originally gonna vote autumn, and i told autumn and she was like fk no so i told her im convinced but i am STILL UNSURE So if I vote kendall: autumn has to win fire making which like statistically i do not see kendall beating autumn, but then tj takes me to final 2 over autumn, and autumn will take me to final 2 over tj, she also threatened to make jury hate me if I cut her now which doesn’t really scare me tbh if I’m next to kendall anyway, but regardless of that threat, me going with tj and autumn gives me a 66% chance of winning this game. If me or Tj win final immunity, I think I win this game. If Autumn wins, then uhhhhggg she will probs take me but like we will thee i just hope she doesnt win final immunity If I vote autumn: me or kendall have to win final immunity, because if tj wins, then I’m getting third place, and kendall would probably take tj as well, so like, yeah i would beat them both at the end but i would be putting myself in a position where i have to win immunity but idk . i think voting kendall is better as i type dis
Tumblr media
final 3 oh my gooooodddd, the fact that i am here is so surreal 2 me, and idk idk this immunity is gonna be the deciding factor of my game and im so nervous but also happy and proud of myself however this game turns out. hoyoyoyooyoy
Tumblr media
SO MISSS AUTUMN JUST UHHHHHHHH wooped me arse in immunity and me and Tj had to PLEAD for ourlives but she ended up TAKING MEEEEEEEEE so partyyy Honslee tho, while this is gonna make winning 90x times harder, I am pretty happy to be sitting next to Autumn cuz our end game mr. and mrs. smith alliance is highkey iconic af ewnfewkjfnewkjnf like we killed each others allies and somehow have been aligned since early merge and I lied to her and somehow we always came back and protected each other and if i don't win im happy she will <3 but with that said, i gotta take her DOOOWNNN
AUTUMN WINS 8-1
0 notes
some short naegiri drabble thing
just a short naegiri drabble thing bc why not im craving naegiri also btw i just played a three hour game of monopoly that isnt finished yet (continuing tmw morning) and im loaded eat my ass togami also i wrote this on my phone which has autocorrect turned off so sorry for any typos/grammar errors and sorry this is not v good i wrote it late at night :/ It wasn't often the two of them got to be alone together, and to be honest Naegi couldn't tell whether that was good luck or not. He and Kirigiri were close, sure, but the two of them often shared awkward silences. To occupy themselves, they decided to walk around the third floor together, hoping to find something that peeked their interests. Aside from a few notes of possible weapons found in several different rooms (ones they'd make sure to be wary of) nothing came up. They returned to Naegi's room together and conversed casually, Naegi often being the conversation starter. They got to know each other a bit better, however Naegi realized something and couldn't help but speak his thoughts. "Y'know, Kiri," he started, looking up at the ceiling. "I don't think I've ever heard you laugh before." "Is that so?" Kirigiri answered, turning to Naegi. "I don't remember ever laughing around you." "Well, I was just thinking that..." Naegi started. "You just seem to keep your composure in every situation... how?" "I can't exactly guess," Kirigiri shifted a bit. "It just comes naturally." "I see... well, I think you should loosen up a little... you seem to be tense most of the time." Naegi faced Kirigiri, his expression showing childish enthusiasm. His friend couldn't help but smile at his expression. "Is this a challenge?" Kirigiri smirked, obviously challenging Naegi. "Alright, make me laugh." "Any rules?" He asked. "No constraints." The next few minutes were spent telling ridiculous jokes and Naegi attempting to do weird actions, but nothing seemed to phase Kirigiri. The odd chuckle was the best reaction he got out of her. "This is impossible!" He half-whined. "You're way too good at this..." he scoffed childishly, trying to think of something else to try. "Hmm, well if you think of anything that tickles your fancy, let me know." She huffed, still smirking at Naegi. "Wait..." Naegi paused, a sudden idea popping into his head after hearing Kirigiri's words. He cursed himself for not thinking of this sooner. Now that he thought about it, this course of action should've been the first thing he tried. "Hey, Kirigiri," Naegi mused, smirking at his friend, which in turn made Kirigiri frown back. "Can I ask you something?" "I suppose," she answered stoicly. "Are you ticklish, by any chance?" Naegi mentally highfived himself for his own idea as he watched Kirigiri's face go from one of confidence to one of slight panic. The answer was clear as day, and Naegi could see the anxiety clouding her eyes. She was blushing slightly, but she was trying to keep her composure as much as possible. "Uh..." Kirigiri trailed off after clearing her throat. "I... don't know?" "You don't know, huh?" Naegi asked a retorical question, leaning over his friend and making himself seem slightly taller. "Makoto Naegi, I swear..." she whispered as she backed herself further away from Naegi, almost falling off the bed. "Well, if you don't know, don't you think it's best to find out?" Naegi asked, raising his hands to his chest level and wiggling his fingers deviously. Upon the sight of his fingers, Kirigiri made a strange choking sound as if trying to fight back a snicker of anticipation. It's not that she was unbearably ticklish, but it was something about Naegi's tone of voice and smirk that just got to her. "I think information like that is best kept secret..." "I don't think so," Naegi said as he started lightly fluttering his fingers over Kirigiri's stomach, causing his friend to jerk and gasp suddenly. She didn't struggle too much, as if determined to hide her ticklishness from Naegi, but oh, he knew. "N-naegi!" Kirigiri gasped. "Un-hand me this i-instant!" she demanded in-between grunts and tiny squeaks, trying to squirm away from Naegi. "Hmm, not gonna happen," Naegi answered, continuing to poke at Kirigiri's stomach, concentrating on getting her to crack. He noted that she must not be that sensitive on her stomach, so he moved his fingers to Kirigiri's sides and gently clawed at them. To say the reaction he got from that was surprising would be an understatement, because he swore he just heard his normally-stoic friend squeal. "Weak spot?" Naegi asked, frowning when Kirigiri shook her head and bit her lip, preventing herself from giggling. Naegi changed techniques, dragging his fingers lightly over Kirigiri's sides. His friend seemed to be more sensitive to that method, so he did more investigating and tried moving his hands even higher. That's when the dam broke and Kirigiri's sudden loud squeak made Naegi jump. "Naegiiii!!" Kirigiri almost whined before starting to laugh, trying to grab Naegi's hands to pry them off the sides of her ribs. "I-I swehehear!! Nohoho!" "Looks like I found a weak spot~" Naegi teased and laughed along with her. He blushed upon hearing her giggles and squeaks, realizing that Kirigiri's laugh was quite... cute. And it seemed that as time passed, his friend's laugh just got louder and squeakier, which in turn made Naegi laugh because this was definitely a rare sight, considering Kirigiri's personality and stoicness. He switched from gentle touches to digging into his friend's ribs, which appeared to be effective. Naegi decided that he should just have fun with this. "Hey," Naegi said in an bubbly tone. "Hey, Kiri." He retracted his hands for a short moment, allowing Kirigiri to breathe. "Eheh... wh-what?" She tried to sound serious, but her aftershocks of being tickled kept her giggling and blushing. "I'm assuming you know about the theory where men have one less rib than women... or maybe it's the other way around? I wanna test that." Naegi smiled almost innocently. "C-can't you just look that up?!" Kirigiri was in-directly begging at this point, considering her ribs were most definitely her weakest spot. "The internet doesn't always tell the truth you know, and plus, why do that when I can have more fun testing my theory on you?~" Naegi teased, which made Kirigiri un-characteristically blush and snicker. God, she's adorable... Naegi thought as he slowly dragged his fingers across each of Kirigiri's ribs, counting them one by one, which was proving to be a good method. He could feel her skin twitching underneath his touch, and it was a feeling he found to be quite satisfying. "Okay!! Okay!!" Kirigiri admitted, folding her arms across her ribs to try and prevent Naegi from tickling them. "Nohoho more!" "But Kiriiiiii..." Naegi whined childishly. "I'm not done counting your ribs yet, and all your distracting laughter made me lose count! Now I gotta start all over again," Naegi huffed, starting back at square one, except this time he allowed all of his fingers to flutter freely over Kirigiri's ribs, which in turn made his friend nearly hysterical. "M-MAKotohohoho!! STOHOhohop!" Now she was begging, and Naegi was feeling quite satisfied with his friend squirming and laughing beneath him. "Hmm... not yet..." Naegi said, moving his hands back to where he started, the sides of her ribs. He dug his fingers into the bone, not harsh enough to be painful, but just enough to make it torturous. "Admit defeat and I'll stop." He teased, his voice just loud enough for Kirigiri to hear over her hysterical laughing fit. "C-Come on!! NAEGI!" She squeaked, rolling onto her right side to try and block out Naegi's hands. This only resulted in her friend moving both his hands to her left side, which didn't make the sensations any better. "Just- STOhohop!!" "Is that you admitting you've lost?" Naegi asked, chuckling as Kirgiri nodded. He stopped, just resting his hands on Kirigiri's ribs as he took in how adorable the other looked. She was blushing and still snickering cutely because of the aftershock. He gently curled his fingers, making Kirigiri tense up as he dragged his fingers down both her sides, getting a few last giggles out of her before finally retracting his hands. "Th-that was cruel..." Kirigiri panted, looking up at Naegi, who seemed quite confident. "I won, though!" Naegi exclaimed triumphantly, smirking down at Kirigiri. "I bet you regret putting 'no touching' in your list of constraints for this game." "Don't think you've won this little game of yours just yet," Kirigiri sat up, quickly recovering from the previous attack and Naegi swore he could see her smirking. "We still have another round, and you're the victim this time." With that being said, Kirigiri tackled her friend so she was on top of him and wasted no time in digging her fingers into his stomach. "W-Wait, nohoho!! KIRI!" Naegi squeaked before being reduced into a laughing mess, squirming around and trying to escape his friend's devious fingers. Let's just say Kirigiri got a more than proper revenge that day. NOTES: frick i didnt expect it to be this Long and i dont rly like how this came out but here take it i havent written a fic in so longgg
31 notes · View notes
bwicblog · 7 years
Text
VD: 😮 see, when my viewers told me there was a new chat o=
VD: 😮 i was hoping it was a live one! o= VD: 😮 or at least there'd be a little spark of life! but this is just so awfully dead o=
VD: 😮 dead BORING o=
VD: 😮 ... o= VD: 😮 i claim this chat in the name of CHANNEL 87! 😮 => u <=
VD: 😮 oh, what the FUCK o= VD: 😮 it's ruining my quirk! o=
SA: you can't claim it.
ID: ahahah wooowww.
VD: 😮 well, gosh, i guess not if it's got people in it! o:
VD: o: pretend you didn't see that! we're having some TECHNICAL QUIRK DIFFICULTIES right now 😮
VD: o= ugh!!! 😮
II: Haha, oh my
II: Well, I'm not quite _here_ since I'm technically at a lecture, but this speaker is dreadfully boring
II: You would think someone who specialized in colonization and diplomacy law would be a fascinating sort of person!
DD: omgggggggggggggg i would be okay with vd claiming this chatroom!!! DD: it would make it about fifty times cooler than before!!! i mean not that its not cool now just that shes definitely cooler and it would be an improvement
II: But they're hideously dull.
ID: nah ii, that sounds hella boring.
DD: i am seconding id!
SA: just quit using the colon with the o.
II: I was hoping they would have interesting stories about aliens, or exploration!
SA: you will look far less suprised.
II: All they have done is drone about minor policy details, which are relevant I suppose but nothing I could not simply read about myself.
DD: well if they are boring details i suspect they figured you wouldnt be especially inclined to read about them yourself so they should say them to you instead so you cant escape!
DD: unless you escape by ignoring them and chatting online instead i suppose but there is no helping some circumstances
II: I always read my briefings.
II: No matter how dull.
II: But going to a lecture is different, I expect some sort of personal flair.
DD: im sure you do but does everyone
DD: its a lecture isnt it i dont suppose youre the only one in there
VD: gosh, sa, that's about what i'm ready to do. VD: it's a shame! that quirk is my THING. VD: but oh well! VD: gotta adapt to the medium!
ID: some trolls just love the sound of their own voice. doesn't mean they're interesting.
SA: 😮
DD: nooooooooo vd 😢
II: Haha, hardly. I am mostly surrounded by teals and a few bluebloods.
SA: i suppose there is no beating it.
DD: rip the quirk
II: But none of them look particularly thrilled either, except those who I suspect are trying to curry favor.
II: And they look rather glassy.
ID: big fish little pond huh ii?
VD: ii, this may be a pretty wild suggestion, so hold onto your pants, but. VD: have you thought about escaping out the window?
SA: some trolls simply sound monotonous but they say very important things.
SA: like me
SA: full stop.
ID: hahaha yeah ii, just dive out the fucking window.
II: Sadly there are no windows in this conference room.
II: Otherwise it would have occurred to me.
VD: and don't cry, dd! the quirk SURVIVES. online, that is! on my stream. VD: winky face!
SA: that is. not at all subtle.
DD: well then take a vent DD: or a ceiling panel!
SA: are you streaming this chat?
ID: fake your death ii. it's the only way.
VD: aww. crawl out under the tables to freedom!
II: I...strongly doubt I would fit through one of those.
II: Or manage to go under the tables, haha.
II: ...though faking my death _is_ sounding appealing.
II: Or at least faking being unconscious.
ID: faking your death is fool-proof.
DD: and ahaha omg DD: im sorry! DD: i was trying not to make it weird but yes oh dear i love your stream very much and i would just like to say that im very pleased that STARship helps make it possible!!
VD: what? no! chats are boring! VD: technically, i might be streaming just a LITTLE. VD: but don't worry, this is not exactly the sort of hard-hitting content that gets my viewers going!
SA: I.
VD: unless ii fakes their death!
ID: you either succeed or they find out you're faking and cull you for realsies.
SA: well, I'm done here for an hour or so.
II: Well if I do, I shall be sure to film it for you.
II: I am nothing if not considerate.
VD: awww. you're a real doll!
II: Haha
DD: ... also maybe if youre ever interested in upgrading well be releasing a new system for synthetic neural synapse that helps streamline wetware-hardware connection and im sure you dont ever have lag but if you do i mean
II: Oh, are you a tech expert, DD?
II: How charming!
DD: i!!! DD: kind of!!
DD: you could say that!
DD: STARship is my company!!
DD: co-company??
VD: ... as is dd! VD: STARSHIP is the big hit that makes it all possible, it is true. VD: why, without them, where would we be? filming with cameras, like a bunch of cocoon-wetting pupas? =:B VD: nah!
VD: oh!
ID: oh god is this just a chat of highblood nerds now.
II: Yes, we have invaded
II: Terribly sorry
DD: well its not when youre here!
DD: 😄
VD: yes, exactly! VD: you are saving us all, id, you valiant hero, you.
DD: wait that sounded like i dont want you here and that is the opposite of what i intended
DD: yes what vd said
ID: uh-huh. totes got my feels injured by that declaration dd, but i guess you patched them.
II: Hahaha
DD: though really its not as though ive gone on at particular length about my work at anybody as of yet i mean i would like to think i am more considerate than that to both those unfamiliar with my jargon and also to my patent legislacerators
II: You don't deal with lowbloods much, do you, DD?
II: Many of the ones I know are not exactly fragile
ID: no ii, i'm suuuppperrrr fragile.
II: Hah!
ID: got a broke ass arm to prove it. =:'(
II: And I'm the governor of Provenance.
DD: i mean not really aside from the lovely members of station 11 that are helping me test my latest prototypes but also i didnt say that because he is a lowblood i said it because i was afraid i hurt his feelings
DD: though there are many physiological and psychic differences between highbloods and lowbloods it is a common misconception that they extend to the psychological! DD: for the most part anyways i mean there are some differences but
VD: i would love to take you up on your sweet offer, dd - mx dd - but i am just not sure i need it! VD: my visual hookup is state of the line. top of the rack! VD: and besides, i think i would miss all of my modifications. =:B can't get THOSE storebought!
DD: what i am saying is that i think that would have been a jerk thing to say to anybody!
DD: if i had meant it the wrong way i mean
ID: what i'm getting from this is that dd is a jerk.
DD: and oh of course i mean i know it is state of the line i am afraid i just got overexcited and-
DD: no i am not!!
II: Ah, I think I would call them...inexperienced?
DD: at least i am not trying to be 😦
II: In some social aspects.
ID: accidentally a jerk.
II: I don't think you are, DD.
DD: what did i do that was jerkish?
VD: hahaha. oh, gosh.
II: It's just plain you haven't dealt with lower castes much.
VD: y'all talk really fast, don't you?
ID: yeah we're hella touchy about you highbloods bringing up our differences. =:'(
DD: i have been told i talk very quickly and at great length my apologies if it is excessive
II: Hahaha
ID: and also apparently being used as guinea pigs for you.
II: Well, that is standard protocol I'm afraid.
VD: no, no, it is positively charming! VD: i just have got to stretch out all of my conversational muscles to keep up!
DD: and really?? DD: that has not been entirely my experience but also workplace sensitivity said that its good not to say all lowbloods are touchy or not touchy about everything in general because that is a bit of a stereotype regardless of which way you go!
DD: and oh dear now i am flustered
DD: thank you though!!!!
DD: that is very flattering
DD: and what do you mean guinea pigs?
DD: i do not eat lowbloods
VD: i.
ID: ....man.
II: ...do you eat guinea pigs, then?
ID: i mean, good on not fucking eating us.
ID: guinea pigs as in making us test your shit.
DD: i mean i have recently had pork yes!!
II: That...oh dear
II: That's not a guinea pig
DD: oh
DD: um!
II: That's just a regular oinkbeast.
ID: ahahah woowwww.
II: Guinea pigs are small and adorable and not really good for meat.
VD: oh, ii, don't drag the poor thing! VD: who hasn't looked at a little rodent and gone: well, shoot! that'd be delicious on a platter!
II: ...myself?
II: I say that mostly because they aren't really big enough to be a proper meal.
DD: i have to admit i am not certain what is common fare for eating when it comes to the landdwelling castes
ID: i mean where you find one guinea pig you'll find more.
DD: i have spent most of my time here thus far lamenting the profound lack of fish!!
ID: they travel together.
DD: i tried to get some sushi but i think the crab was fake
II: Gracious, DD, you almost make me want to take you for dinner somewhere, though surely that'd interfere with your work.
VD: oh, i don't know about that! VD: i got in a hive once that had a guinea pig just about the size of a house! VD: mean little critter, too. it nearly took a chunk out of my poor leg.
ID: 'got in a hive' sounds ominous af.
VD: i think everyone'd be better off if dd had gone and eaten that one. 😮 u o=
VD: oh, fiddlesticks.
DD: no thats fine i can work at any time but its not any time that i have the opportunity to make a new friend! DD: as long as you dont feed my guinea pig i suppose x))
II: Haha, I would never. Have you heard of Civitrecce, DD?
DD: oh no whats wrong???
DD: and no ii i am afraid i have not but i am also afraid i have not heard of most places that are not located underwater or in orbit!
VD: haha, it is only ominous if you want it ominous, id. VD: which is to say, i'd explain, but i'd hate to break the sense of suspense you're building here!
DD: except troll chicago but that was in a musical
DD: i am very in suspense!!
ID: i mean i'm just imagining you break in to hives for funsies.
II: Fair enough! It's my home city, though I am rarely there. It boasts many fine restaurants, including those tailored to the elite, so they have fine seafood.
VD: getting warmer, id! =0 u 0=
II: It also has a spaceport and land travel hub, so it has plenty of trains heading there.
VD: yessss, success!
DD: omg!! DD: in that case i would absolutely love to visit DD: you dont suppose they have any shops that sell nice moisturizer do they because i am coming to realize that this hotel does not come equipped with a salt bath and my gills are drying out and its becoming quite painful and DD: oh dear but thats me just being a complainer now!
DD: what did you do vd??
II: Oh, of course they do.
ID: hahah woow what did you expect being in the desert though dd?
II: ...I'm sorry, break into hives?
VD: 0= i got my quirk working again! =0 VD: 0= look at this, it is just like in the vids. =0
ID: text it vd breaks in to hives to murder for funsies.
DD: omggggggg i love it!
DD: and she doesnt MURDER anyone!!
DD: and i dont know ive never been to a desert!
VD: 0= what nooooo. 0= VD: 0= anyone can murder people! that's not impressive at all! =0
DD: expected it to be like the tropics!!
VD: 0= no one's going to watch that! =0
ID: so what do you do then.
DD: only the coolest stunts ever!!
II: Do you cause property damage and enter without the owners' consent.
VD: 0= hahaha, what is this, an ama? =0 VD: 0= because man, i love those. =0
ID: the fuck is an ama.
VD: 0= property damage is for wrigglers, ii! =0 VD: 0= the KEY to making it fun for the whole clade is breaking in without breaking anything, taking some stuff, and leaving before anyone can even grab their trident! =0
VD: 0= an ask me anything! 0=
VD: 0= where people.. well, gosh, ask you anything. =0
II: I see.
ID: ...so you stream breaking in and stealing from folks.
ID: highbloods.
II: _I_ do not condone this.
ID: 🙄
VD: 0= oh, don't worry, ii, i think you're pretty swell! 0=
DD: oh come on ii its not as though it really hurts anyone and besides if they didnt want their things stolen they should have installed better security systems!
SA: you sound like the sort of person that steals the remote control batteries and watches the hive dissolve into chaos.
VD: 0= and it's - yes, exactly! =0
DD: or worse ones i suppose since part of the fun is the challenge of a good security system
II: It is still illegal.
VD: 0= to both of those! =0
SA: "it's not like it really hurts anyone" "if they didn't want their things stolen they should have installed better security systems"
ID: highbloods pris.
SA: there is so many things. wrong. with that sentence.
VD: 0= i'm helping people improve themselves through a little TLC. 0= VD: 0= and by helping them put off doing their lethal bar paperwork! =0 VD: 0= it's a hard job, but gosh, someone's gotta do it. =0
II: The kind of logic used by all sorts of criminal rubbish.
SA: help me, Hadean.
VD: 0= it's not really a crime, if you think about it! =0 VD: 0= why, you could probably even say it's a public service! =0
II: It is _not_.
VD: 0= hahaha. i'm joking. =0 u 0= it's totally illegal. =0
ID: get 'em ii.
II: Yes it is and I find it particularly appalling that someone of your blood would do such a thing.
II: Shame on you for disgracing your caste.
ID: yeah vd you're setting a bad example for us lowbloods.
ID: ii if you ever catch me stealing it's because vd made it look cool.
II: Ha
II: _Clearly_ .
VD: 0= am i a disgrace, ii? =0 VD: 0= because 1m viewers per session says that an awful lot of people think i'm a shining example! 0=
II: This troll isn't a suitable role model for a blind grub.
ID: also quick fact is it stealing if you're looting a corpse.
VD: 0= i am not quite sure of what, though, now that i think about it. =0 VD: 0= gosh, i should do a poll. =0
II: Your viewers are likely average bored citizens - no, not technically.
VD: 0= ewww. don't touch corpses! =0
ID: great!
SA: no it's just grave defilement.
VD: 0= that's how you get hornrot, id! =0
II: I mean, to be fair, I'd consider it wasteful to not. Unless they have quadrants who would like the body or belongings back.
II: Then it would be disrespectful, but not illegal.
ID: if they're recently dead it's fineeee.
VD: 0= oh, yes. =0 VD: 0= breaking into hives is wrong, but touching dead bodies is perfectly fine. 0=
SA: i'm sorry, did you go looting corpses today?
VD: 0= ii, i think your morals are a little questionable! =0
VD: 0= i think you're setting a bad example here! =0
II: Morality isn't the problem here. It's the law.
ID: not today. but some times a troll has to find some quick cash!
ID: yeah vd.
ID: i'm immoral but i'm legal.
II: Morals don't enter it. Luckily, I really do not care what you think, since you are a criminal.
II: Moreover, a _stupid_ criminal who talks about their crimes in an Imperial server.
VD: 0= well, isn't that just a knife straight to my heart? 😢 =0
SA: please it's not as if the police will come hunt them down for blasting it in a defunct server.
SA: they are a high blood.
SA: who... actually cares.
ID: ^^^^
II: I don't care for their blood. I care for their blatant immaturity and defilement of the legal system.
II: They ought to be disciplined.
SA: as long as they're looking from a caste below them the police will turn a blind eye.
VD: 0= haha, yeah, i would not put it exactly like that, but. =0 VD: 0= close enough! =0
II: _I_ am not below them.
ID: so a firm slap on the wrist.
ID: aka what any highblood ever gets.
ID: unless they fucked with a higherblood.
II: I am two castes higher, and this is wrong.
SA: then call the police and we'll wait.
VD: =0 oh, don't worry, ii! =0 VD: =0 i said i'd never steal from your hive, because we were being downright frondly. =0 VD: =0 but let's be honest here! =0 VD: =0 i wouldn't steal from your hive because you're an awful stick in the mud, and i don't think anyone'll be quite impressed by your collection of troll twilight books! 0=
SA: 😮
VD: =0 u =
II: It's hardly that simple, as I'm sure you know, but I will certainly be filing this - haha, what. Oh that's amusing, considering I have no interest in that series and in fact recently derided it.
ID: also is attempted but not fully carried out murder a crime? just asking random questions i've always wondered with someone who knows law at hand.
SA: Hadean i am aggressively elbowing you in spirit.
II: Mm, technically, but it also depends on a lot of other legal codes.
VD: =0 it's only ever a crime if you get caught, id! =0 VD: =0 or if you stream it live, every night, at 6:00PM IST! =0
ID: i'm not murdering anyone pris, i'm just curious.
SA: "asking for a friend"
II: It varies by area and specific caste restriction, though I'm in favor of investigating as many attempted murders as possible.
ID: no, asking because i have a lot of free time on my hands to ask these questions!
SA: i hate you :l
II: Ignoring the small crimes usually leads to getting complacent toward the bigger ones.
ID: =:P
SA: 💚
ID: so chop the hand off the thief to send the murderers a warning kind of thing?
II: Pfft, how barbaric. Hardly.
ID: so like, then. what's the worst crimes a troll could commit?
II: Difficult question depending by what standards you're asking.
II: Castewise, the murder of a tyrian, though even that's a thorny issue given that the Condesce generally appreciates _fewer_ challengers, though there are exceptions for non-heir or heiress fuchsias.
VD: =0 oh, i know this one. 0= VD: =0 early culling a heiress! 0=
II: Please ignore VD, who is not a legal expert, and an idiot.
ID: shots fired.
VD: =0 so don't spear any princesses, id. 0= VD: =0 that's an awful big glitch to make. 0=
ID: i have yet to run in to any princesses but i'll keep it in mind.
II: But if we're talking more generally, destruction or alteration of Imperial property is a big one. That causes us a lot of issues every sweep. On a wider scale, sabotage of the fleet itself.
SA: oh i have.
SA: but they were already dead when I got there.
VD: =0 well, i say give ii all the attention they're so desperately craving. 0= VD: =0 after all, it'd be mean to steal their limelight! 0= VD: =0 even if they are droning like the speaker they were just complaining about. 0=
VD: =0 wow! 0= VD: =0 really? 0=
ID: oh i get elbowed over asking about murder, but you can talk about a dead princess?
II: I suppose it's easy to interpret my giving of facts as attention craving from the person who clearly rotates their life around that very thing.
SA: well, I wasn't involved in it.
ID: i wasn't involved in murder either but iiii still got elbowed.
SA: (also I was not serious)
SA: why would i casually asy.
SA: I found a dead heiress.
VD: =0 what? booooo. 0= VD: =0 i was excited to hear about a heiress! 0=
II: Even if you were, it's hardly my business. Fuchsia disputes are above my station.
ID: uh because you do cool shit?
II: Unless the culling was done by a lower caste.
SA: oh do you really think so?
VD: =0 there's a girl who streams and CLAIMS she's tyrian. 0= VD: =0 but i am pretty sure it's just make-up! 0=
ID: i mean dangerous but cool shit.
SA: claiming ones relation to a tyrian heiress is. unwise.
SA: 😊
II: There are violets who play at being tyrian, heaven knows why. Such a thing is not only dangerous but incredibly silly.
ID: no one here is destroying property or sabotaging the fleet ii.
ID: so what about crimes that you actually see?
SA: Oh, well, there goes my weekend plans.
SA: thank you, Hadean.
II: Haha
ID: =:P np, np.
VD: 0= gosh, id, way to be a regular buzzkill. 0= n =0
ID: that's me. head buzzkill.
II: Sometimes I deal with ones involving Imperial property, but often it's far more ordinary work. But I'm afraid we're breaking for snacks, so I'm going for a bit.
ID: well bye.
ID: snacks can be entertaining at least.
SA: ... breaking for snacls...
ID: highbloods need their snack breaks pris.
SA: oh. yes.
SA: silly. me.
ID: otherwise they get cranky! =:P
SA: 🍱
ID: careful you'll summon back the sushi-fish.
SA: DD?
ID: yeah.
AA: sushi what now. >:?
SA: 🌮
SA: there.
ID: dd wants sushi. despite being in the desert.
AA: that's a taco.
AA: >:[
ID: fuck now i want a taco.
SA: I know it's a taco, I'm correcting my sushi mistake
AA: go get a taco!!
AA: and o, o, ic.
SA: he's going to say something like
ID: tacos cost money. =:P
SA; i can't afford a taco
SA: yes.
ID: i'm sorry i'm poor pris!
SA: i could wire you money.
ID: nah i'll just whine at sips.
ID: (ps my hair is so fucking soft.)
SA: 🙄
SA: send selfie.
ID has sent sofuckingsoftman.png!
DD: omg are we sending selfies? ^_^ DD: im sorry i had to go for a little bit there was a tad bit of an explosion and i had to put out a fire DD: or well tell the bot to put out a fire!!
ID: gotta remember your fire safety dd.
SA: beautiful.
ID: also sure it can be selfie night.
DD: and oh dear your hair looks very lovely!
SA: how hard is it to ... not cause explosions.
DD: thought the horns are interesting ive never seen a floating one before is it mechanical?
ID: hahah no that's my horn.
DD: and surprisingly difficult in some circumstances! DD: i mean part of the testing process was to see if it would explode so
ID: allll keratin.
DD: test success!! DD: it just exploded more than i thought it would!
DD: and oh dear then how is it floating?
DD: and omg wait wait i want to send a selfie too then
DD: um! DD: oh no my hair is a mess um
ID: magic. and psi.
DD: one minute i need to find a comb!!
ID: mostly the psi.
SA: silly hadean.
SA: magic isn't real.
SA: clearly it's a collective hallucination.
ID: fuck you magic is real. =:P
SA: fuck you 😠
DD: fancy! that sounds like it takes up a lot of energy though i suppose horns are fairly small and if it is already attuned to you on account of it being your own growth... DD: anyways!! comb!
DD: brb ❤
SA: there they g.
SA: ...go
ID: that was a teasing fuck you. =:P
SA: i would never say fuck you and mean it 😇
IJ: Nobo>y better be breaking the law in here.
AA: dnw, prni's emojis arne as genuine as yrn floating horn. >:}
ID: oh my god my horn is realsies.
VD: =0 oh my god, what is this? 0= VD: =0 legislacerator central? 0=
SA: what are you going to do, copper.
II: Oh, are we doing selfies -
II: I'm working on that, Halvea
ID: it's selfies night in here.
ID: dd is off primping for it.
VD: =0 oh! 0=
IJ: It is something, alright. Selfies? Is that it? Hmm.
VD: =0 brb, i'm going to get my mirror! 0=
II: haha, I'm afraid I only have an old one. I rarely do selfies.
SA: it's very easy.
SA: you take your phone.
ID: oh my god highbloods.
SA: hold it above your head.
SA: and hit 'take photo'
ID: allll gotta primp!
SA: and send it to the chat.
II: http://cloudbattrolls.tumblr.com/post/152449745713/i-stole-her-glasses-and-fed-them-to-a-chihuahua
AA: you can't just hold it above yrn head, prni.
II: Camera was poor quality, unfortunately
AA: therne's an A RN T to selfies.
SA: an art.
SA: why the teal bangs.
-IJ has sent PhotoDay.png to the chat! It is mostly Halvea being unwinding in her office. Her tie needs actual tying.-
ID has sent lookselfiesarenotart.png!
ID: man, i just did what pris said and. viola.
II: Oh my, you have such interesting tattoos, ID
ID: a genuine selfie.
II: They almost remind me of paint
AA: they'rne clownpaint. isn't that neat?
SA: ...
AA: i think it's neat.
AA: >:}
ID: ohhhh my god they're tattoos.
SA: 😂
SA: look at you, IJ.
ID: i did not have a guy spend twenty hours jabbing a needle in to my face to be told it's paint is2g.
II: Haha, why would they be paint? Even if they were, that's not half-paint, it wouldn't be at all suitable.
SA: wait.
SA: you actually had that tattooed onto your body.
SA: I assumed it was just. birthmarks.
ID: yes.
AA: ikrn?
SA: i.
IJ: Teal is a perfectly fine color. IJ: An> you aren't allowe> to wear excessive amount of face paint while on the job. It can get in your eyes an> can cause temporary blin>ness.
SA: ...
SA: I don't know you. at all.
DD: whats wrong with primping maybe i want to feel pretty! DD: :D DD: anyways here you go!! DD has sent selfienight.png! [Dazzle is in some sort of mechanics lab in the background with hastily combed hair and making a peace sign to the selfie cam while beaming. He's already found time to add a bunch of stickers and filters to the photo.]
II: That is not an excessive amount of facepaint, Halvea!
II: It's a perfectly reasonable amount.
IJ: I know, In>ri>, I am stating for the peanut gallery why you >on't.
VD: =0 congratulations, dd, you are positively adorable! 0= VD: =0 i like the bows! 0= VD: =0 very nifty! 0=
SA: you would almost be cute if you weren't insufferable and a worse space cadet than myself.
ID: there is no paint so let's drop the paint tak. =:I
II: Oh, how precious!!!
ID: wow pris, suave.
II: You look so cute, DD
SA: i use my best lines on you, of course
SA: i have my priorities straight.
DD: omggg thank you!!!!! ❤ ❤ ❤
DD: i found a new app that has a lot of cute filters and stickers so ive been using it a lot!
ID: i like that your horns don't match.
DD: oh um! DD: haha they actually used to so im glad you think it looks nice now! DD: they used to make the loveliest heart shape together but unfortunately there was an incident!
II: Oh whoops, I missed SA's question
DD: and now i have no horns basically
DD: 😢
VD: =0 i know? asymmetry is such an eye-catcher! 0= VD: =0 you can make an entire logo out of that. 0=
DD: omg ❤
II: I like teal! I am surrounded by tealbloods thanks to my job, after all
DD: that is a hell of a way to cheer a troll up you guys thank you
II: So I dye my hair with it
ID: ahahah wow is that why you have no hair too?
SA: I... see.
IJ: Horns are often something that can become a hazar> when working in many fiel>s, it is a smart thing to >o.
ID: or is that a style choice.
DD: um! no that was also
DD: an accident
DD: the same accident actually
DD: or well a different occasion but overall the same series of events
ID: my horns are never a hazard and i love them.
II: Your horns look very sharp and useful!
ID: but uh. sorry about the accident i guess.
SA: that is the biggest lie i have ever heard.
DD: but i think ive had it cut nicely now dont you?
SA: short hair is practical anyways. You should embrace it.
DD: oh dear
VD: =0 well, dd's already seen my selfie! 0= VD: =0 but here, since everyone else's putting up pictures: 0= VD attaches TROLLSTARWARS.jpeg! [ It's her making a victory sign at the camera with tiny robotic camera-drones surrounding her. ]
DD: thank you! DD: and really it is not that big of a deal now aside from the um DD: lack of hair and horns and having to leave my home and all of that DD: which is to say its been a lot of trouble but really im sure it will sort itself out!!
ID: i mean it looks nice for short hair. I just always assume seadwellers have long hair because. i don't know.
VD: =0 short hair is practical! 0= VD: =0 no industrial accidents that way, haha! 0=
ID: what are those things.
DD: omgggg ❤ ❤ that is very cute vd! or maybe just epic!!!
ID: i want to take a bat to them.
VD: =0 you wouldn't be the first, id. 0= VD: =0 winkyface! 0=
SA: 😉
DD: and you wouldnt be wrong id its very common to have long hair after all it is ideal to emulate our lovely sovereign in all ways we can ❤
DD: i used to have long hair that is to say just not anymore!
VD: =0 yes, sa's got my number down. haha! 0= VD: =0 anyway, they're video drones! 0=
ID: hurrah, all stereotypes have some truth to them after all.
DD: omg ❤
ID: ....are you so in love with yourself you need constant video of all angles or...
DD: well you have to have the best angles for the best stream!!
DD: besides all of merlons angles are good angles
DD: because she only shows the best angles!!
ID: ...are you a fangirl.
DD: well i mean i am definitely a fan but i am not a girl!
ID: ...fanboy. sorry.
DD: its okay im sure its a common assumption to make about my caste given the public face of the empire is a lady ❤
ID: also you have a face that could go either way.
VD: =0 sorry, sorry, unexpected guest! =0 VD: =0 but our hold is done and i am BACK. =0 VD: =0 and i'm not in love with myself, id. that'd be silly! =0
DD: oh really do i?? DD: i dont suppose i pay enough attention to that sort of thing but girls do tend to be really cute so i will take that as a compliment!
VD: =0 but i have to make sure to please all of my delightful fans! 0=
ID: uh-huh.
ID: dd. vd or one of those rainbowdrinkers in all the movies right now. which are you a bigger fan of?
DD: um!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
DD: um!
DD: um um um um
SA: pick one the other dies.
DD: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ID: nah one of them doesn't actually exist pris.
ID: too easy a choice then.
DD: well then i would have to pick vd of course because the rainbowdrinkers are already dead!!
SA: i know that, I just want to up the stakes.
SA: but aren't they still living at heart 😢
DD: oh dear
ID: no one dies, you just have to make the choice dd.
SA: how else will they love bellae.
DD: this is a really difficult decision!!
DD: especially because i only really just found out about lestat and oh dear
ID: lestat's mate looks the superior one in that movie anyways.
DD: you are being really tough here and i do not think i can make that decision!
VD: =0 oh, gosh, id. 0= VD: =0 obviously i would pick dd. that's not a choice at all! 0=
ID: it's a tough world out there dd. =:P
DD: OH NO now i feel bad!!
DD: im so sorry vd of course i would pick you i was just temporarily enamored by my recent introduction to lestat
ID: w2g vd now he feels bad.
VD: =0 rainbowdrinkers are gross! 0= VD: =0 i don't know about you, but my lusus taught me that you shouldn't touch corpses. 0= VD: =0 never mind kiss 'em! 0=
ID: ...how about culling them.
SA: VD is right. prions.
VD: =0 yes, exactly! 0=
ID: ii is culling a rainbowdrinker illegal.
VD: =0 they're already dead, silly. 0= VD: =0 how are you gonna cull them? 0=
SA: i don't believe so as many of them go off the grid when they die.
SA: they are considered legally dead.
ID: i mean. burn them to ash?
SA: and many places superstitously view rainbow drinkers as culturally unacceptable despite the Imperial stance they are not real.
DD: i dont think you can get prions from kissing someone and oh dear i dont think rainbowdrinkers are really supposed to be like corpses! DD: they are walking and talking people after all and i do not think a corpse could have hair as nice as lestat or eyes as piercing as edwards
SA: so.
SA: No it would be encouraged to murder them.
DD: this is a very troubling conversation oh my goodness
ID: welcome to this chatroom almost every night dd.
DD: !!!
AA: aww, n, it's not T H A T bad. AA: yesternnight we werne talking about sushi.
AA: and all the ways to make it.
AA: fish like sushi, rnight?? >:}
SA: 🎊
DD: i love sushi!
DD: i have been craving some for nights!
AA: lmfao, good.
ID: it wasn't that incredible when i had it.
SA: no. not this again.
SA: damn you Sipara.
AA: 💚
SA: 🖕
ID: no damning sips for one whole night, she earned the privilege by letting me use conditioner.
SA: she can be damned for twenty minutes.
DD: well maybe you did not have very good sushi id DD: i tried the sushi out here and it was probably fake or at the very least very unfresh and really its much better when you have it properly made with fresh caught fish DD: also i just very much enjoy fish in general on account of eating it a lot of the time!
DD: and oh dear
SA: excuse me.
SA: I have excellent taste.
AA: wtf, don't i earn the prnivilege by spending an hourn brnushing yrn headfluff??
ID: that too.
AA: >:{
ID: i told you it tangles like a bitch.
ID: i t o l d you.
SA: i brought him the sushi he ate. and i am very particular about food.
DD: then maybe it is simply not to ids tastes to eat fish that wouldnt surprise me given it is probably not a part of his typical palate
ID: that's probbbsss it.
ID: i'm used to eating burgers.
ID: and squirrels.
SA: oh i've wanted to --
DD: oh ive never had a burger but ive seen them on tv a lot!
SA: ...how.
SA: I would die
ID: there's only so many things to eat in the middle of the desert pris. D:<=
SA: so fry a scorpion?
AA: you told me, but i told you it'd be, like, way bettern if you let me brnaid it. >:P AA: but w/e, w/e, it's way less tangled now, gj.
SA: leave the mammals alone...
AA: dd, go eat a burngern.
DD: !!
ID: nope. raw ass squirrel meat pris.
AA: actually, n. fuck the burngern. AA: just go stab a hoofbeast, and, like, eat it rnaw.
ID: just bite the fur off and went to t o w n.
SA: what
AA: that's the RN E A L landdwellern expernience.
AA: ain't got nothing like it.
DD: maybe i should i have been holding out in the hopes of maybe being able to get something i am used to delivered here and it has mostly resulted in me living off of lattes which is not a very good diet especially when i am attempting to be productive
SA: 🐴
DD: and they always look very good on tv though kind of weird i guess!
ID: burgers are the fucking best.
DD: theyre so..... cooked!!!
ID: ...and donuts.
DD: and in such a weird way!!
ID: yeah welcome to the land.
SA: please go to a restaurant, DD.
SA: there is an. entire world.
ID: if you don't cook the fuck out of them they might carry disease.
SA: the donuts or the burgers.
ID: both.
SA:
SA: ...
SA: I don't. know what i expected.
ID: =:P
DD: well im sure fish carry diseases too but i eat those raw all the time DD: maybe it is a matter of constitution??? DD: regardless i will definitely go eat a burger once i am done with this module do you think they would make me one without cooking the meat
ID: probably not.
DD: oh dear 😦
ID: the meat will not be. fresh.
AA: n, absolutely.
SA: actually yes.
AA: just thrnow yrn weight arnound.
DD: um!!
SA: Improperly prepared sushi can bear a number of worms and viruses.
AA: be like "I want this so frnesh it's strn8 off the hoofbeast" and they'll T O T E S go w/ it.
AA: .................
SA: particularly if it isn't chilled properly.
AA: ..................................................
ID: now you tell me. =:I
AA: why arne you feeding hads wornmy fish, prni.
DD: that sounds very concerning i have had the un-fresh fish here and i am not sure i want to have the un-fresh thing i havent had yet!
SA: I wouldn't do that to Hadean.
SA: I ate sushi at the same place before I brought it to him.
AA: would you have known it's full of wornms, tho.
ID: pris has the money for the fancy stuff sips.
ID: like. pris how much did you pay for your current outfit.
SA: I couldn't tell you.
ID: guesstimate.
AA: and it ain't that unfrnesh, dd, jeez. AA: trnust meee.
SA: however, I made roughly $3500 today.
SA: catching that indigo.
SA: so.
ID: see?
AA: hads li - >:1
SA: also yes because I would have gotten the worms too.
DD: what if maybe they can cook it like a little bit but not all the way do they do that
ID: man i should have let you wire me some cash. =:/
SA: that is caled a rare burger.
SA: you missed your chance, Hadean.
DD: oh!!!!!!!! DD: so those are a thing!!!
SA: besides what was it you said about taking advantage of people.
SA: and I should watch out.
SA: :p
AA: n, too late, yrn in the brnoke-ass rnust squad, hads. AA: no take-backs!!
ID: =:P you're learning. what have i created.
SA: 💚
ID: he still owes me a shopping trip one day though!
ID: no takebacks on that!
SA: you will be very fashionable. and also very practical.
SA: i promise.
DD: that is very good to know and i will try that because i suppose coming here should also be about trying new things!!
DD: and oh my goodness you should show us what you buy when you go shopping!!!
ID: yeah dd, dive in to the experience.
DD: changing room pix for your fav outfits! ^_^
ID: i live in a tent.
AA: lmfao.
ID: there is no rooms.
DD: ... changing tent pix?
DD: why do you live in a tent?? are you an adventurer?
AA: oh my goooooood, he meant in the storne, hadean.
SA: we aren't shopping in the tent.
AA: ^^^^^
ID: oh.
AA: also, prni, you gotta make surne he doesn't buy anything lame.
ID: sorry i don't go clothes shopping you guys.
SA: i will.
ID: i have three shirts and two pairs of pants and this shirt isn't even mine. give me a break.
AA: and y, totes an adventurnern, dd.
SA: dd, hadean is actually a fashion icon.
SA: you see, they're trying an experimental style.
SA: it's called minimalism.
SA: have you heard of it?
DD: wow that is not very much clothing even i have a lot more than that and i barely packed anything before i left aside from my lab equipment!! DD: we should go shopping together id you really need more clothing than that
SA: it's all the rage now.
DD: and yes i have but i thought that meant you have a lot of the same outfit and you style it differently
SA: oh my god.
ID: ...i have a lot of the same outfit.
ID: and style it exactly the same.
AA: omfg.
ID: and by a lot i mean. 2.
DD: thats how they make it look so nice!! DD: your outfits arent going to look nice if they are worn out because you only have two of them!
AA: evernyone else is being a dumb chucklefuck, dd, so, like.
AA: so let me say, on theirn account:
AA: y, pls go shopping w/ them. >:}
SA: i know how to shop.
DD: omg yay!!!
ID: i wonder what happened to my hooker uniform tho.
ID: wait what.
DD: wh
DD: your what
AA: he's an adventurnern, dd.
AA: duuuuh.
SA: hooker = / = adventurer
DD: that is not what i meant by adventurer!!!!
SA: --
AA: what sornt of adventurnern does not have a hookern outfit?
SA: !!oh!!
ID: i'm not actually a hooker.
SA: my god
AA: how else arne you gonna get in the brnothel to crnawl thrnough the vents to kill the duke?
DD: ............... i guess i did not think that was a thing outside of video games!!
ID: sometimes you need to dress the part tho.
AA: go thrnough the frnont doorn?
AA: puhlease.
DD: that makes sense!
AA: ofc it does.
ID: yes it does.
SA: sipara
SA: oh.
SA: you are all.
SA: awful.
SA: Peopple.
SA: I thought i was bad.
DD: you havent seemed like a bad person to me at all sa! 😦
DD: and neither does anybody else here really i mean i am pretty excited to try a burger and i wouldnt have done that without you guys!
AA: >:}
DD: omg maybe we can have some together when we go shopping?
ID: get cheese on it, cheese makes it better.
ID: well sips we are going to port port to drop lal off, right?
ID: sips can totes go on the shopping adventure too, right dd?
AA: y, y.
AA: wait, what.
ID: =:)
DD: oh there is nowhere good to shop here i dont think the town is so small!!!
DD: we should to go to the coastal city i got to see some of it on the way in and it is much larger
DD: and it is not that far away by train
ID: there we go!
AA: i wouldn't want to intrnude on yrn fancy, like, boy bonding time. >;0
ID: sips can totes use some fashion tips dd.
DD: omg!!
DD: i love giving fashion tips!
DD: the secret is BOWS
ID: perfect!
ID: sips could use some bows!
AA: fuck off, i've - oh my god.
AA: bows, like. AA: in yrn headfluff?
DD: i mean unless you are making fun of her fashion sense in general which strikes me as a little bit mean i am sure that you dress just fine!!
DD: and yes!! DD: and also i have one on my back!
DD: like at the top of my shorts its very fun to twirl with and it is nice and gauzy in the wind its almost like swimming again!
ID: sips, you twirl right?
AA: i
AA: have nevern twirnled so much in my goddamn life as i would, uh, with a bow.
AA: >:?
DD: i mean if twirling is not your thing i am sure we can find you something else its not like the style i like for myself is what everyone else likes to wear
ID: we'll find a style all your own sips!
DD: yes exactly!! 😄 ❤
AA: hahaha. >:}
AA: well, y, as long as we find one forn hads too. AA: did you know he's got fluff down to his glutes??
SA: oh, yes.
DD: yes i saw earlier when we were doing selfies and i think you said that you are the one that brushed it and i wanted to say that you did a very good job and it looked very beautiful!
ID: sips has a funner figure to shop for i think. we should focus on her.
SA: please, style it too.
DD: and yes we can find a style for everyone you and me and id and sa!!
ID: she's famous y'know.
SA: we could loop braids and put a bun in the back.
SA: very chic.
DD: and oh dear is she i am sorry i did not realize
SA: woodland chic, even.
ID: she needs famous fashion flair.
DD: omg!!! that sounds very fun maybe we could get some bright colors
DD: and something more flowy for id though i guess not so much that it is elven even though i admit that is the thought i had between the hair and the braids and such
ID: ...flowy.
SA: oh so.
DD: do you not like flowy we dont have to do flowy i just thought it would look nice with your hair maybe
SA: legolas.
SA: it's your favorite, Hadean.
ID: pris. D:<=
SA: alright, alright.
ID: i need stuff that won't get caught up on stuff.
DD: omg haha we can totally do something like that!!
ID: i do a lot of climbing and fighting and stuff. adventurer and all.
DD: oh that makes sense you are an adventurer after all!
DD: i suppose we will just have to see when it is time to pick out items what you like best and what matches with it !! ^_^
SA: Oh, look.
SA: I just had an extended case come up for this perigee.
SA: I'll be stuck in Provenance, I suppose.
SA: I'm very sorry.
ID: D:<= what a fucking shame.
AA: whaaaaaat.
AA: >:'{
DD: oh!! 😦 DD: that is very unfortunate but maybe we can do another time! DD: i hope it is not too much work for you i recall you mentioning you finished another case recently and really that seems like a lot of effort so i definitely wish you the best of luck in your endeavors!!
SA: ...yes.
SA: it was. exhausting.
AA: it's okay, dd, we can all totes go shopping next time in prnovidence.
AA: why, i hearn they've got the best burngerns on the entirne continent.
AA: full of, like, hoofbeast meat, and blood, and shit.
SA: ...
SA: you know what, I changed my mind.
SA: I won't take that case.
AA: >;0!
AA: dd, show me pics of yrn bow, btw.
DD: i do not think i want to eat anything that is full of feces!
AA: ..........
AA: ..........................
DD: and omg! DD: yes one moment!
AA: >:??
DD: and oh dear i am sorry i think i misunderstood the terminology that you used
ID: no actual shit in the burgers. don't worry.
DD: it is late and i am a little bit tired i am afraid!
ID: unless you go to the reaaallly cheap places.
DD sent thefluffiestbow.png
DD: but yes oh my goodness that all sounds very fun and we should totally visit sa!
SA: i believe that's beyond cheap, Hadean.
SA: no. No please don't.
DD: oh
DD: um!!! DD: sorry
SA: Providence is full of. Crime.
SA: and trafficking. yes.
DD: oh dear
SA: It would be very unsafe for Sipara or Hadean to visit.
DD: oh dear!!
ID: we're strong rusties, we'll manage.
SA: 🤦
DD: are you sure you are doing alright then sa i mean that sounds like a lot of trouble!
AA: aww, prni, therne's no need to get all concerned abt us. AA: we'rne strnong independent rnusties and we'll manage. besides, we'rne wornrnied abt Y O U.
AA: that city sounds RN O U G H.
SA: i am quite alright, thank you.
AA: also. okay. ngl. AA: that's a qt fucking bow.
ID: clearly we should go visit to give you some support!
ID: but if you're soooo concerned.
ID: we can go to the port city dd mentioned.
SA: Yes.
SA: yes let's do that.
DD: omg haha tyvm aa i am very happy you think so!
DD: and oh dear maybe it would be good to go to the city! DD: sa sounds like they maybe dont want to be in their city all that very much and it would be a good chance for them to get out!
SA: no, I rather like my city, thank you.
ID: i haven't seen the ocean in like. 3 sweeps.
SA: I have a view of it from my loft.
DD: i am very confused about who wants to go to what city now!
SA: it becomes less. awestriking. when you see it every day.
ID: we're going to the port city that is actually a port. and not riddled with crime.
AA: .. idk, but you ppl sornt it out. AA: i gotta get a trnuck tmrnw, and. idk. wherne the fuck you get those.
AA: so i'm gonna go figurne that out. >:?
SA: a ... dealership?
ID: do i have to sit in the middle.
DD: i suppose id did just decide where we were going so that is that!
SA: --
SA: oh that will be. good.
AA: y, lal alrneady called windowseat, soz.
ID: gdi.
ID: i hope it's roomy. =:I
AA: i do not have sa's mad buxxx, so, like, lmfao. AA: y. let's hope. >:}
AA: crnoss yrn frnonds!!
ID: my horns are gonna scrape the top of it probably. =:'(
SA: I'd offer you all a ride but I only ride a motorcycle.
DD: oh dear that sounds uncomfortable!
DD: maybe we could go to a salon and have your horns polished if they get scraped id!
SA: I think he meant he would scrape the felt off the roof.
DD: hornicures sounds nice it has been a while since i have had one after all it is a little bit embarrassing to go into a salon with broken horns
DD: and oh well they are nice regardless!
ID: what's a hornicure.
DD: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
DD: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
DD: its when you go to a salon with your friends and you have them sand your horns and polish them and glaze them!!
DD: and sometimes you can put on really cute designs or accessories like rings and
SA: You know.
ID: hahahah sand my horns.
DD: its really very very fun!!
SA: as we do, Hadean.
ID: i had them polished like a week ago. for the first time.
DD: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
DD: we are definitely getting you a hornicure!!!!!!!!!
DD: you will love it!!!!!
SA: in all seriousness, I need to go lie down again. I am rather dizzy.
ID: =:I does it hurt.
SA: i will see you all later.
DD: oh dear that sounds very alarming maybe it is because you were working so much
DD: i wish you a restful sleep please be well!
ID: ...yeah... rough night. =:I bye pris.
DD: and no they do not hurt at all! DD: it sometimes pinches your cuticles a little bit if the people doing it are not very experienced but we will go somewhere good to make sure nobody hurts you! DD: i want your first hornicure to be really really nice!
ID: uh how often do they deal with floating horns.
DD: ....
ID: perhaps i am not cut out for hornicures.
DD: probably not very often!!
DD: well they could still do your other two horns!!
DD: and i am sure doing a floating horn would be even easier since it is not that big and has no cuticles!
ID: i mean my floating horn is like. bigger than sips' horns combined.
DD: well it is not bigger than both of your other horns combined and i am sure they get plenty of customers with very large horns so it should not be a concern dont worry! ^_^
ID: i mean... i guess.
DD: really you do not need to be afraid i promise they are very relaxing and soothing and make you feel really super nice!!
ID: i mean really i'm just a lil wary of your willingness to wanna do this stuff with some rusties.
ID: we're a little. out of your lane.
DD: .... oh
DD: um!
DD: what do you mean??
ID: i mean. why do you wanna hang with us.
DD: because you guys have all been very nice and introduced me to burgers and you seem like a lot of fun!
DD: and i havent gone shopping or gotten a hornicure with some friends in ages and it seems like it would be a really nice time!
DD: and also you need more than two outfits!!!
ID: i guess that's a better reason than most have.
DD: oh dear
DD: i am sorry if i have reminded you of bad past experiences i promise i am just looking to make some new friends and you guys have seemed very friendly so far
ID: it's fine, a rust just has to be a lil wary.
ID: i mean. we're the same shade as the trolls you probably have testing your stuff. whatever that is.
DD: i understand!!! DD: at least i think i do??? DD: um! DD: i do not want to say the wrong thing!
DD: and actually there are mostly yellowbloods in the facility though there are some brown and maroonbloods around and some olives and there is even one cerulean psychic roaming around!!! DD: or maybe two DD: um i admittedly cannot really tell if there is one or just two that look very similar it has been very confusing
ID: pfff you must mean gliese.
ID: and... not-gliese.
DD: oh does that mean there are two??
DD: that is a relief to know i was beginning to think that i was going to talk about them at one point and get it wrong
ID: yeah there's two, dw.
ID: but yeah. facility stuff can make some of us rusties a little wary.
DD: well if it makes you feel any better i am not working for them they have just volunteered to allow me to offer to their participants who would like to try out some of my new prototypes that are in the troll trials stage!
DD: they are all very safe and such the only issues are with connection speed
DD: and integration capacity!
ID: if you say so. i have no idea what that stuff means.
DD: it mostly means that when things go wrong it just makes people feel like things are going really slow or not all the way until they disconnect!
DD: but i cant really go into more detail than that
DD: because it is technically still in beta!
ID: ...that does not really clear up the confusion but okay.
DD: but yes i am not fleet i am a member of a private organization and i do not think i am actually old enough to work for the empire
ID: man now they're drafting young seadwellers.
ID: does no wriggler get a break these days.
ID: what happened to leaving a troll be until they hit ascension.
DD: wait what
DD: are you being sarcastic or did you misread what i wrote?
DD: i am having a hard time telling over the internet!
ID: that's my charm dd, i'm sarcastic and truthful at the same time.
DD: !!!!
ID: mostly truthful-y rn tho.
DD: that sounds like a very confusing sort of charm!
ID: you get used to it.
DD: but yes i suppose then i should clarify that i said that i am not conscripted at all!
DD: and am likely too young to be so
ID: but you're... working for a company that works for the fleet?
DD: in fact my best friend and i have started our own company and it has grown to quite a large size!! DD: the fleet has actually purchased a contract with us recently
ID: looks like some hazy ass lines right there.
DD: oh no we are working with the fleet and it is our honor to due so but it is our own startup and it is contract-based product supply!
DD: i do not work with the fleet directly even the pr things are mostly my good friends strong suit i am mostly research and development
ID: if you say so. seems like a confusing mess to me.
DD: well!!
ID: but i'm not a. researcher.
DD: there is working for somebody as in you are hired buy them
DD: and then there is them coming into your restaurant to buy a meal
DD: in the latter situation you are not working for them they are simply making a purchase!
DD: that is what we are like!!
ID: oh. okay.
ID: i guess you must be good, if they're buying from you and not like. an adult.
DD: i try to be humble most times but it is true that we are very very good!! DD: though i muse credit my good friend with a lot of it because admittedly the product does not make the company and there are plenty of fabulous inventors around that have gotten nowhere so it is their talent at management that has gotten us this far
ID: sounds like a complicated balance of you making good stuff and then being able to sell it well.
DD: yes exactly!!!
II: Management does tend to factor more into successfully selling products than pure talent, I'm afraid.
DD: it has probably been obvious as of late but i am not the best people person so i am very grateful to my friend for putting up with some of my silliness in the past and handling the business side of things
II: Not that I am doubting DD, but unfortunately surface appearances are usually what trolls consider when buying.
DD: i do not think i would have even thought to sell any of my work without them!
II: Oh, don't be so hard on yourself, DD.
II: You are perfectly pleasant
II: Merely a bit unpolished
DD: oh well i am very glad that you think so haha i am glad that i have not misstepped too much yet
II: DD, trust me.
DD: and that is one way of putting it!! DD: but hopefully i will be able to polish myself more soon and maybe the first step is going to get our horns polished id >:D
II: I have moved in highblood circles since I was a very young troll, and have observed _far_ greater errors than any you've made.
ID: maybe you two should go on a. hornicure trip.
DD: but we are already going on one together!! DD: you do not need to have them that often but maybe some time later ii and i can besides we are already going to a restaurant in civitrecce ^_^
II: We can certainly go for a hornicure trip afterward, if it wouldn't be too much time out of your schedule!
ID: i mean me and sips are traveling rn, we won't be back in port port for a while.
DD: well yes and i would love to but it would be pointless since id and i are already getting our horns done but maybe we can do a movie or our claws instead or something??
DD: and that is okay id i am not free at this exact moment anyways and admittedly i do not actually know when people want to hang out
DD: i was hoping it is kind of soon so that i could have my first burger with you guys but i suspect that i may have to break and go eat before then!!
ID: yeah def go eat.
ID: try some chicken tho.
ID: and rice.
ID: chicken and rice are good together.
DD: okay! I have had rice with fish so hopefully rice with chicken is just as good!
DD: speaking of which i should probably go do that right now to be honest my stomach is positively hurting now that i pay attention to it and i have had nothing but trollbucks all night!
DD: ...day!
DD: hopefully there are places open this late!
ID: you'll find something i'm sure. g'day.
DD: good day!!!! ❤ i am very excited to go shopping with you!
1 note · View note
goldenscript · 6 years
Note
yeah dude my brothers make bank and they always offer to buy me groceries so bless them. in ms-hs i was really involved in the SAFE program at davis, not sure if you’ve heard about it! it’s an asian american org and was always great+very insightful for me. not advertising i swear!! awh good luck with english and your papers! sounds like you’re never gonna be running away from writing lmao and yeah about that, im trynna switch my major atm and go into human development. i have a friend (1/?)
that works in the department at davis already too and he’s willing to help me out if i transfer so that’s lit. see man i got so many people and connections at davis issa shame i couldn’t go there ;-; but it’s my fault, i was waitlisted and they eventually accepted me but i didnt see the email until a month later and they give u a 1 week deadline to reply… so.. ye there’s my tragic story.. eYY lmk your results if you do hop back on! and yes omg xmen is so.. like biologically cool bc every- (2/?)             
thing’s explained and ur like so when am i gonna like get some powers lol genes wya. YES IT IS!! omg wow we’ll be in such close proximity of each other that’s wild?? AND RIGHT LMAO KOOK HAD ME HOLLERIN bc i could imagine it so vividly. but really?? no way!! that’s crazy bc it’s so popular, it’s abg central but the drinks are bomb i swear on my LIFE em. i usually go for okinawa or plain milk t tea if im not at pekoe. i have an essay due monday so i have to be working on that all day tomorrow (3/?             
but other than that i prob wont be doing much! oh and tell me about some of your childhood/favorite shows! (4/4) -sjsu            
i haven’t heard about that actually but it sounds so cool! especially since it’s an asian american org too. i haven’t gotten around to joining any orgs and part of me half-regrets it since i really do like doing those kinds of things. i was a club president back in high school and i was always stressed and top of my shit but in the best way tbh??? but yeah, that’s amazing that you enjoyed it so much! thank you though! i’ll just have to work hard to finish this quarter strong so i’m taking all the luck i can get
ooh, human development! my roomie’s considering minoring in that since she wants to be an elementary school teacher. that’s so tight that you have so many connections already dude. :( i had a friend who was waitlisted and was gonna go to sac state but switched back to davis since they wound up admitting her a few afterwards jkdhgruijngs regardless, i can’t wait for you to come here and hopefully we can meet and hang!
i will!!! i promise!!!! and dude, yes, i fuckin’ love that their explanation has some scientific plausibility, though i don’t know a whole lot of its accuracy since i am only a mere English major - i still like to hope and think it’s pretty damn accurate tbh. but god, imagine having a power??? what would your power be? i’m torn being being an empath or manipulating time, because with empathy if i worked hard enough to develop my skill i’d actually be able to mimic powers (i spent a lot of time looking into powers when i was doing this writing thing with an old friend of mine) or with time manipulation i could actually.... teleport like How Awesome would that be ksdfhsjfskfskfs
MOOD. i love that thread and i wish it’d come into fruition tbh. also, oooh okinawa! i’ve tried that one. i’ve tried different ones but i always jump between earl grey and wintermelon since they’re both classics to me. i wanna try pekoe now :( also, omfg good luck on your paper!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
a few of my favorite childhood shows have gotta be totally spies, teen titans, kim possible, courage the cowardly dog, and scooby doo. god i loved those shows so much, especially teen titans! omg and american dragon: jake long!!!!!!! nowadays, i watch agents of s.h.i.e.l.d. and i think that’s it lmao. i used to watch teen wolf (hated it after season 3b), once upon a time (the most recent season is pretty wonky to me and idk i just fell hella behind and i’m too lazy to try catching up), and the 100 (like the first two seasons were good but then it started getting meh with the major characters deaths and the ways they went about the character development... though i’d call it more like underdevelopment in more ways). what about you?
0 notes
topreview2016 · 7 years
Text
In-Depth Review of Fast Fat Burning Meals Cookbook
Growing up, my parents were obsessive about counting calories.
We had nothing in our kitchen that wasnt Low or No Fat. Blech, I want to throw up in my mouth just thinking about the low fat cookies that, from a distance, had a green box similar to Thin Mints.
I admit, I was a little skeptical when I saw a book about fat burning, because I thought it would be more watery, haphazardly thrown together, bland ingredients that could barely be called food.
I was wrong about this cookbook.
I know, its easy to think that everything that tastes good is horribly fattening. My dad always quotes Jack Lalannes famous one-liner: If it tastes good, spit it out!. But thats just a weird product of our societal conditioning.
Unlike what most of us have been taught to believe, food is not our enemy.
Did you know that a study has shown that people who buy the low fat version are going to eat up to 50% more than someone who buys the regular version of that same thing?
Its pretty crazy when you think about the psychological effects of all those low/no fat labels, isnt it? Not only that, but research shows that diet foods stop our brains fat storage receptors from working properly, so our bodies dont get the signal to quit eating long past when we actually are full.
Your body stores fat to protect itself against chronic stress and inflammation. Stressing about what to eat, which McBurgArbys Fried Bell to order from tonight because you feel too tired to cook causes your stress levels to rise, which causes your body to store even more fat.
This cookbook is your key to breaking out of this vicious circle.
Healthy food doesnt have to taste like sawdust or take hours slaving over the stove. Stop riding the crash diet rollercoaster today and see for yourself.
One of the authors, Yuri, used to live in France, so he knows how delicious their food is. I love the richness of French food. In fact, my mouth is watering just thinking about French sauces and creams
Dont worry, this cookbook isnt going to ask you to prepare a 5 course meal every night.
You dont have to be Julia Child to master these recipes. I only learned how to cook 3 years ago and had no problem following these recipes. I read through the entire cookbook and didnt see any recipes that I would stay away from because they sound like theyd be too complicated.
I love that the authors address the French paradox:
How are the French so thin, even though they use real butter when they cook?
It turns out that its not just one ingredient that determines whether youre thin or not, but the entirety of what you eat and whether those ingredients are processed or not.
We know French people can seem, well, on a different wavelength than Americans. Youll want to pay close attention to the differences weve found between their eating habits and ours.
They prepare their meals from scratch. Im sure the thought of a French person waiting in a bumper-to-bumper drive-through line for some greasy fast food seems as absurd to you as Subways Jared Fogle opening an after-school daycare center.
I know, I dont have time to spend in the kitchen all day, either.
Thankfully, we dont have to. All of the recipes in this cookbook take just 15 minutes to prepare. And I dont know about you, but Ive spent at least 15 minutes waiting in a drive-through line before. Why not spend that time investing in your health instead of clogging its arteries?
Recipes that take only 15 minutes to make and use ingredients from scratch? This must mean its going to taste as exciting as the idea of spending my whole day off at the DMV.
If you, like me, have been burned by the blandness of low and no fat food, dont let the fat burning in the title throw you off. The Moroccan Chicken is delightfully addictive, and you gotta try the Metabolicious Kiwi Smoothie!
What do I get with this cookbook?
In addition to the cookbook, youll enjoy 3 bonuses:
Wheat-Free Wonder Breads: Just because it doesnt have gluten, doesnt mean it isnt delicious. This part consists of mostly baking recipes. Youll want to try their banana bread.
Slimming Smoothies: Amy and Yuri give you great, filling combos of fruits and veggies for delicious smoothies.
30 Fast Fat-Burning Meals: This part is the key to preparing healthy, delicious anti-inflammatory food. Your immune system will be thanking you for making these every night, and your loved ones will be excited about dinner again.
Also, youll receive an adorable Grocery List, a 30 day meal plan, a new cookbook every month, along with a monthly newsletter and access to the members only Facebook group.
I love how on Yuris YouTube channel, he has a video of him going to McDonalds and seeing how long it takes to get his food. Surprisingly, it took even longer than the 15 minutes it would take to prepare one of these recipes.
This cookbook will fit all dietary preferences and restrictions (like Paleo, Raw, Vegan).
That means is it is universal and will be helpful to everyone. No matter your background or food preferences, you cant help but reap the benefits these recipes have to offer you.
Stop obsessing over how many calories youve had today, its only going to stress you out and remember, that is part of why your body stores fat, to protect you from chronic stress. But you are stepping off the Calorie Crazytrain now because you know that this cookbook presents a much better solution.
Of course, dont just take my word for it. I am confident that youll be so happy you did this, and youll never suffer through the Oh no, I ate all of my calories for the day in just one meal! anxiety attack again when you try these recipes.
Try preparing recipes from this cookbook for just 1 week and the results will speak for themselves.
Youve struggled for so long, counting calories, trying to stay on the merry-go-round of crash diets. Why not make it easy for yourself and enjoy the process with the Fast Fat Burning Meals Cookbook?
Imagine what youll be able to accomplish with all that free time you have now, since youre not constantly searching for the next Miracle Diet or spending hours obsessing over calories. Just think about how great itll feel to show off your svelte new figure.
Everywhere you go, people will be complimenting you on how great you look, and how you seem so much more peaceful. Theyll be bugging you constantly to ask how you did it.
Can you picture all the looks of disbelief youll get when you tell them that you did it only 15 minutes a day? Bon apptit indeed!
For Instant Access To Fast Fat Burning Meals Cookbook, Click Here
var exitsplashmessage = 'Wait, Click The "Stay On This Page" Button Right Now If You Want To Get The Lowest Price!'; var exitsplashpage = 'http://www.topreviewo.com/get/fast-fat-burning-meals-cookbook';
The post In-Depth Review of Fast Fat Burning Meals Cookbook appeared first on TopReviewo.com.
0 notes