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squishy-mochi-is-bright-pink · 3 years

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hi! uh—sorry if this is confusing, it’s my first time making a request. uhm—i’ve just been feeling rlly down lately and was considering self harm. so, if it’s okay with u, can i request for tsukishima/sakusa/osamu (u can choose if doing all is too much) seeing their s/o with a fear of sharp objects about to self harm but not going through with it and them comforting their s/o? u dont have to do it tho if ur not comfortable with it, i just wanted to try asking :)

Characters: Tsukishima and Sakusa

CW: self harm, sharp objects

Genre: comfort

Word count: 1, 616

Summary: You've been struggling with thoughts of self harm, which then lead you to a fear of sharp objects. Your boyfriend notices and tries his best to help you.

A/n: your request wasn't confusing at all, don’t worry. So sorry I didn't get around to writing Osamu but I hope this is alright. if you ever need someone to talk to im here, or you could request as much or as little as you want. Just remember self harm isn't the answer, alright? Remember you're loved <3

Tsukishima

Okay, so even though everyone says that Tsukishima doesn’t care or isn’t a good boyfriend to you that is a big fat lie and you know it. This boy is super observant. ESPECIALLY when it comes to you.

You’re his baby and the love of his life, and one way he shows his love to you is by paying attention to everything you do and acting accordingly. He’s usually subtle about it though. You shiver? Oh, look extra hoodie. Tense up when one of your classmates approaches the two of you? Oh no something came up with the team and you’re both required to solve it.

Slight rant aside, he notices immediately that something is wrong. It may take him a little bit to figure out what exactly but he’s looking into it immediately. By the end of the day, he’s checked with your friends if anything is bothering you, he’s found out whether or not you are behind on work or if school is stressing you out. But nothing.

Luckily for him, it was Friday, thus, he was coming over to your house after school (practice). Usually, he’d come over and do some homework then you’d watch a movie together and honestly you could use some affection right now.

When he arrived at your house you were already showered, dressed and waiting at the table to start your homework. He came in and placed a gentle kiss on your forehead and sat down across from you, he’d already changed into casual clothes after practice.

Tsukishima exalted deeply for the first time that day and let himself relax now that he was alone with you. He’d spent his entire day trying to figure out what was up since you’d been acting weird for a little while now and he was back to square one. Nobody he’d asked knew anything that might have upset you, and he’d asked a lot of people. More accurately he’d asked Yamaguchi to since he knew people found Tadashi less intimidating. However, he still hadn’t had any luck in narrowing down the issue.

You seemed to be focused on whatever work you where doing so he decided to do some of his own work and ask you about it during the movie. He pulled out his maths book and a pencil from his pocket to begin working on the algebra homework.

After around thirty minutes of working together with some lofi playing in the background and occasionally asking for help from one another, his pencil lead snapped in the middle of an equation. Slightly irritated, he went to his bag to retrieve a sharpener but couldn’t find his pencil case. Shit, he must have left it in his desk. Oh well, he won’t need it till Monday anyway.

“Hey, Shortcake,” that stupid nickname he’d gave’ you made you look over to him “do you have a pencil sharpener? My pencil case is at school.” At the mention of a sharpener, you squeaked out no far too quickly. Okay, somethings up. He’s sure of it now.

So he gently set down his pencil and placed one of his hands on yours. When you looked up and made eye contact you could see how concerned he looked. Though it isn’t just concern, there’s something soft and loving there too. It’s because of this that you just aren’t able to break the eye contact, even though you’d much rather check your house slippers for bits of dust.

“Baby,” he starts softly, “I know somethings up. You’ve been different for a few days now. And as long as you’ve been in my class you’ve never forgotten your stationary. Do you want to talk about it? Or we could do something else if you want.” By now there were tears beginning to slowly roll down your cheeks and Kei had gotten up to wrap you up in a hug. “Come one baby.” he says as he guides you over to the couch to sit down.

Once he had you settled in beside him he started to rub gentle circles on your back and waited patiently for you to calm down enough to talk to him. Once you had calmed down a little you began to explain everything. From the thoughts of self-harm to avoiding anything sharp or dangerous just in case. And he just sat there and listened. All the while gently rubbing circles and patterns into your back. He listened to every word you said and took it all in making sure to give little nods or hums of acknowledgement, enough to let you know he was listening without interrupting you.

When you’d finally finished telling you everything he simply scooped you up in his arms and hugged you as tight as he could. “Baby, Y/n. I’m so proud of you. You’re so strong and I’m so glad you didn’t do anything.” he gently kissed the top of your head and whispered, “I love you so much.”

You snuggled further into him and he turned the tv to your comfort movie, even if he didn’t love it or would much rather watch a documentary about dinosaurs.

Sakusa

Sakusa is another boy who people wrongly assume is a bad partner. I object. Although he is slightly more hesitant when it comes to physical affection in public he’s one of the best boyfriends you could ever ask for.

Generally, when the two of you hang out he has a routine to ensure there is no fear around germs and he can be as affectionate as he wants. You both take showers and change into freshly washed clothes when you arrive at either home before you spend time together.

Because of how naturally observant this boy is, and the number of showers he’s had to take at your house he has your shower products almost memorised. He knows what they are, what they do and where they go. Honestly when you’re running low on something he’s more likely to notice than you are. And of course, being the loving boyfriend he is, he’ll remind you to add it to your shopping list or even go shopping with you.

This mans love language is probably quality time or acts of service, so if there’s an opportunity to give you a hand or just spend time with you he’ll take it.

Today was just another day, well not exactly, Sakusa was coming to spend some time with you today, which honestly was not rare at all. You had both fallen into a steady routine of taking showers and changing before spending time together. He would never ask you to do it but you knew it made him more comfortable. Plus he far preferred your shower to the locker room one.

So as always he walks into your house, puts his bag on the table and walks to your bathroom to take a shower. When he’s in the shower he notices that your razor is missing from its normal spot. He thought that was a little bit odd. Mostly because he has never seen your razor missing before. Any time he noticed something was missing before it was always just running low on shampoo, or body wash or only having one bar of soap left.

It isn’t that weird so he just makes a note to himself to remind you about it later like he always does. Once he’s finished and changed into his favourite sweats and second favourite hoodie (you’re currently wrapped up in his favourite). He goes to your room and curls up beside you as you’re preparing to put on a movie.

By the time Sakusa had remembered what he needed to remind you of the movie had been playing for around 20 minutes. So he decides to just wait until after the movie to bring it up. With that decision made he just decides to focus on the movie and how you feel giving him cuddles.

After the movie was all finished and you and Omi where cleaning up, when he brought up the missing razor. “Hey baby, remember to add razors to your shopping list. Yours is missing” he mentioned as he placed your throw pillows back on your bed. He paused in the middle of fixing your pillows, that was not the reaction he expected. Something was up. When he turned around and saw you near tears he rushed over to check on you.

“Baby, talk to me whats wrong?” hes says in the most soothing voice he can muster when he reaches you. You dont respond, just crying a little harder and hugging him back. “Its,” you sniffled a little, “its nothing Omi. Ill be fine” you sniffled again trying desperately to pull yourself together.

Sakusa pulled out the handkerchief he kept for you in his pocket. And by the time you'd told him everything he was crying too holding you. "it's gonna be alright baby. I'm here, we're gonna get through this together."

You fell asleep holding together, knowing that you weren't alone. And wouldn't be as long as you have him and he isn't leaving any time soon

#haikyuu comfort #haikyuu fluff #haikyu x reader #haikyuu #sakusa x you #sakusa drabble #sakusa comfort #tsukishima x reader #tsukishima headcanons #tsukishima fluff #tsukishima kei #sakusa kiyoomi #tsukishima hcs #sakusa hcs

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heavensmortuary · 3 years

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🍁🍂🍁🍂Alright, since its mid-September, its time for my annual spooky movie reccomedation list! I include ratings, and I can include trigger warnings for any of these films upon request as well! I'm also looking for horror movies to watch myself, so feel free to comment/ask any as well!! So, here we go, in no particular order...🍁🍂🍁🍂

Fantasy/sci-fi horror:

The Thing 1982 [R]: A group of scientists find a shapeshifting alien underneath the ice in Antarctica, and they just survive as it imitates them. Trust no one. The Thing is one of my favorite movies in general. Its scary, retro, and the special effects are insane. It reminds me of classic Lovecraft, but better. Very terrifying. 10/10

Pan's Labyrinth 2006 [R]: During the Spanish Civil War, a young girl named Ofelia enters a world of twisted fantasy while above, her step-father's brutality causes trouble in the midst of a rebellion. Genuinely a beautiful movie. It's like a fairy-tale, and sometimes you forget it's a horror movie. It's simply magical, but frighteningly real. If you love classic fantasy, monsters, history, and horror, you'll love this movie. 10/10

Alien 1979 [R]: A team on a shipping vessel in soace come in contact with a parasitic alien within the clausterphobic confines of the ship. A classic, and it's still absolutely terrifying. Sharp insight on early 80's consumerism (in more than one sense), and a marvel of alien horror. Its very claustrophobic, tense, and 100% worth watching, especially if you love scifi. 10/10.

Aliens 1986 [R]: Continuing the story of Alien, space marines must investigate a distress signal from a colony, and what they find is more horrifying than they could have imagined. Full of retro action, humorous quips, scares, and plenty of bullet spray, it's a terrifying and fun watch. I enjoyed it just as much as the original, and its just awesome, while being scary at times. 10/10

Annihilation 2018 [R]: After the mysterious death of her husband, a Biologist goes into Area X to discover what horrifying cosmic entity his team found there. Not nearly as good, or accurate as the book (I CANT reccomend the Southern Reach trilogy enough), but this movie genuinely frightened me at points and the setting is simply beautiful. Its clever, creepy, and it's a strange watch. 8/10

Signs 2002 [PG-13]: After strange symbols appear in the cornfields on a family's farm, they must protect each other, and their faith, during the invasion. Love this movie, it's just spooky enough, but outside if the monsters, the people in this movie are what really matter. It's compelling, and a beautiful story. Simply excellent. Plus you'll know where the screaming guy in a closet meme comes from after seeing this one. 10/10

A Quiet Place 2018 [PG-13]: Could you survive a world where making a single sound could spell your death? Monsters decend upon the Abbot family, just as a baby is on the way. One of my favorite movies ever. Its beautiful and ABSOLUTELY horrifying. I think I forgot about eating my popcorn while watching this one. Overall, the desperate survival of the Abbots is heartwarming, but oh so stressful. If you can, PLEASE watch the sequel right after this one. 10/10

A Quiet Place 2 2021 [PG-13]: The Abbots face new challenges as they traverse a devestated landscape, and monsters wait around every dark corner for them. An EXCELLENT sequel. I caught myself actually going "NOOO AAAA" at some points, and its totally a worthy sequel to the scares in the first one. Again, great story, great characters, great cinematography, great message. 10/10.

Coraline 2009 [PG]: Coraline Jones, unhappy with moving to a new house, suddenly finds a whimsical world in a little hidden tunnel inside the house, but she learns the sinister truth behind the candy-colored world beyond the wall. Dont let the stop-motion animation confuse you; this movie is terrifying. A classic from my childhood, and its a treat to watch every Halloween. The Beldam has to be on the list of the most horrifying villains ever. 10/10

Zombies, ghosts, ghouls, and everything in between:

The Haunting 1963 [G]: Based on the novel The Haunting of Hill House, a group of people must stay in a supposedly haunted mansion. Eleanor, one of the women, suddenly believes that the house is talking directly to her. One of the many adaptations of the book, it's spooky, and it's very disturbing, while also having a nice theme. Perfect for setting the mood on a October night. 8/10

Night of The Living Dead 1990 [R]: Survivors take shelter in an abandoned farm house while the undead attack. Can they work together, or let their own prejudices get the best of them? I havent seen the original yet, but I love this movie. Very scary, and its directed by Tom Savini, so lots of good ol zombie gore. Not only that, there's a good bit of social commentary here on racism. The classic was the original zombie film. 9/10.

Dawn of The Dead 1978 [R]: As the undead rise up, survivors take to a shopping mall in order to survive. I don't know how to describe this movie's vibe. It has this weird retro 70's feel, mixed with uncanny horror. It's campy at times, but it doesn't take away the scariness. Very fun in a weird way, and its an on-the-nose satire of american consumerism. 10/10

Train To Busan 2016 [R]: While the world crumbles around them, a small group of survivors must learn to protect each other on a train headed to Busan. Seriously, please watch this one. It's completely unique to any zombie film I've seen. It's scary, but you genuinely care about the characters, and its VERY intense. Love this one. 10/10

Murder and ect:

Scream 1990 [R]: A masked serial killer stalks high school students in middle class suburbia. Its a parody of the modern horror genre, clever and scary all at once. I enjoyed it as a classic and I liked the commentary on how violence with no essence effects people, especially when glorified with horror films. Definitely not for everyone, but its good never the less. 8/10

Wait Until Dark 1967 [NR (I give it a PG-13)]: A gang of criminals looking for heroin attack the home of a blind woman, and it turns into a horrifying game of back and forth between them, until it can go on no longer. Literally one of the best thriller movies ever. Genuinely scary, and genuinely clever. This was actually the first film I saw Audrey Hepburn act in. Super tense near the end, I was biting my nails the whole time. 10/10

The Village 2004 [PG-13]: A rural community is faced with a hard decision as the monsters in the woods leave bloody warnings around their small town. I watch this one every autumn. Its atmospheric, the score is breathtaking, and its a great story. Its beautiful, gently frightening, and its overall a love story. I love this one a lot, even though I know a lot of people didnt like it. Don't go in expecting a great twist at the end, and you'll enjoy it. 10/10

Jane Eyre 2011 [PG-13]: Jane Eyre becomes the governness to an estate, and find a dark secret there. Not necessarily horror, but its gothic and absolutely beautiful. Its the perfect october movie. I love it lots. Nothing hits different than a rainy october day, a cup of chai tea, and this movie playing. 10/10

TV Series:

Stranger Things 2016- [PG-13]: After a child is taken by a supernatural force, the small town community of Hawkins must search for answers and find him before its too late, but as they search, a horrifying conspiracy comes to life before them. I adore this series. Its a love letter to the 80s. Cant reccomend it enough. 10/10

The Twilight Zone 1959-1964 [PG]: A serialized series featuring many different stories ranging from scifi to horror and everything inbetween. Its genius honestly. Each story is compelling, and thought provoking. A great Halloween watch. 10/10

The Walking Dead 2010- (seasons 1 & 2) [R]: A sheriff wakes up from a coma to find himself in a terrifying world of the undead. Its a decent series, at least in the first two seasons! Its pretty scary. Its great if you like zombie movies! 7/10

Over The Garden Wall 2014 [PG]: Two brothers find themselves lost within the world of the Unknown, a place where time is blended together and reality isn't quite right. Ok, real talk here. Its my favorite series of all time. I could go on and on and on about it. If you haven't seen it, please I beg you. Theres nothing like it. Its literally the BEST autumn show to watch. Clever, funny, lightly disturbing, deep, nostalgic...its fantastic. 11/10

So, there you have it. Huge list of horror movies I've enjoyed and actually reccomend. I have seen quite a few more than this (Halloween, Dawn of the Dead 2004, Nightmare on Elm Street, ect), but I specifically picked out the ones I love the most. Enjoy! And have a great autumn.

#krakens croaks #hope yall enjoy!!#feel free to rb and add some reccomenations

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ndoandou · 3 years

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Hi!! I saw your requests were open, so uh could I request an Ikevamp headcanon for Arthur, Theo, Vincent and Isaac reacting an MC who is super energetic. Like, as in she could literally dance around the mansion without having a care in the world? ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ

Yeah lol pls feel free to take your time with this request and have a nice day!! ༼ つ ◕◡◕ ༽つ

This is cute 😳😳

This ended up being wayyy longer than i thought it would be. Arthur's part went deeper than i thought it would be-

This is probably one of my longest headcanon/scenario, i hope you enjoy 😌

Lets say for context, MC is sweeping through the hall while humming, and as time went by her humming becomes louder. Eventually she straights up start singing while twirling and dancing around

Arthur

The first encounter with this trait of MC kind of surprised him. He wasn't expecting young lady to be this active and bright

Gets along very well with her actually

He doesn't mind her energetic personality, but sometimes in gets in the way when he is working on his stories.

He doesn't see her as "annoying" like what most people woukd describe her

He just thinks that she has so many things in her mind (in a good way) that she expresses them all at once //my mans pulling off a doctor doyle 😳

Arthur was in his room, trying to concentrate on his writing when he heard MC singing loudly outside

"I dare say, she is one active lady." Arthur said to himself as he exhaled.

Arthur got up and openned his bedroom door, revealing MC who was singing and dancing around with the broom

MC noticed arthur who was leaning on the door frame with a defeated expression

"Good afternoon to you arthur!" MC greeted him cheerfully, which then she went back to singing and dancing around

"Good afternoon to you too, dear" arthur said which MC probably didn't hear

Once he tried flirting with her but it all flew over her head

This one time MC and arthur was left alone and he tried to make a move on her

Arthur leaned over to MC's ear and whispered

MC seemed unbothered and let him lean over to her

"Seems like we're left alone, love.. would you like to have some fun?" Arthur whispered suggestively

MC was an innocent and very bright girl but she wasn't stupid

"Hm? No. Oh! Arthur can i ask you something?" MC asked unbothered by arthurs invitation

This took him by surprise

"Oh..ehm, go ahead poppet."

"Am i annoying?"

Arthur was blown away by her question.

"Annoying? No, no. That's not it, love. Why do you ask?" Arthur asked her curiously. He wasn't expecting this question from her.

"Ahahaha..! It's nothing important, its just when i lay down at night, i start realizing the unpleasant looks i get from some people whenever im doing something or saying something. I tell myself not to be annoying but i lose control of myself the next day." MC said cheerfully as if what she felt wasn't anything serious at all

Arthur felt really bad after hearing that. He realized that she was being misundertood badly.

He realized that behind that cheerfull personality, she had such deep thoughts

He wasn't expecting her to reveal her most vulnerable side to him out of everyone

He realized that the time he looked defeated arounded MC must have been in her memories

"Oh..oh dear me. I didn't know you felt that way, and im sorry if im one of those people who made you feel that way." Arthur said, with a sympathetic look on his face.

Arthur realized that MC never wanted to cause discomfort to anyone with how she is.

"Hmm i probably sounded REAL silly with what im saying, you can pretend that i never said anything, honestly!" MC said casually as she got up from her chair

"Wait! Hang on a second, poppet. Sit back down" arthur said as he gestured her to sit down, which she did

"I dont think you are annoying. You are just misunderstood, love. It seems to me that you have many going on in your mind that you express them all at once, like a big ball of energy." Arthur explained to her

MC's eyes widen

She found his explanation rather accurate

"Oh..you..you think so?" MC said taken back by the way arthur described her

"Yes, yes. I have an idea for you, poppet. If you want to learn how to express yourself better, how about you try writing all the things in your mind- in any form you want." Arthur suggested

MC's face lit up

"That sounds very fun!" MC exclaimed

"In fact, i want to do it now!" MC said as she jolted off her seat hurrying over to the door

"Oh, and thankyou very much arthur. You are the first person to understand how i feel" MC said smiling genuinely as she headed out

Arthur felt his heart skip a beat.

Without realizing, his cheeks were tinted pink

"By jove! What is this feeling?" Arthur said to himself

Surprisingly, MC was seen in the library writing away in peace most of the time, when she isn't doing her chores

If arthur was working on his own work, MC would sit next to him and start writing aswell

She would write poems

Everyone was worried if MC had fell sick because it was very unusual for her to be this quiet, but arthur just explained that she found herself a new hobby.

Mc would show arthur what she had written, and arthur woukd be blown away everytime.

Everyone got curious with what MC was writing, and when they read her poems, their brains just melted away

Even when vincent brought one of her poems to shakespeare, he became shookspeare

Everyone actually encouraged her to publish her works to the public

MC was excited with that idea, but she said she would give it a thought

Occasionally MC would be the ball of energy she was, but she settled down more

Vincent

He would find it extremely adorable!

Just combine MC and Vincent together would make them the angels of all angels

For context, vincent would be entering the mansions gate after visiting shakespeare

He noticed a dancing figure in the hallway through the window

As he entered the mansion, he could already hear MC's singing voice from the second floor

He goes upstairs and there was MC singing and dancing around with the broom

"Hello MC! You seem very energetic as always" vincent greeted with a smile

He would ask MC if she was singing a song from her time period

He would even ask her to teach him how to sing the song

Vincent isn't an energetic person, but MC's personality rubbed onto him

He would only be energetic around her as she is basically the catalyst xD

Vincent would end up dancing around with her, spinning around through the hallway, laughing and singing

The night after goofing around with MC, she was stuck in his head

He got up from his bed and went over to his art supplies.

He had the strong urge to paint her

The way she danced, sung, and laughed created a crystal clear image in his head

After spending the whole night painting, he was knocked out asleep from morning to afternoon

MC was sent by sebastian to wake him up

She recieved no answer when she knocked, which then she invited herself in

When she came in she saw a beautifully done painting of her

Feeling her heart skip a beat

For once she felt really shy instead of her energetic self

"V-vincent, its afternoon" MC shook his shoulder gently

Stirring up, vincent woke up

"Oh..good afternoon MC. Thats strange, usually you would yell at everyone to wake them up."

Being fully awake, he noticed that her cheeks were tinted red

"Whats wrong MC? You seem rather flushed" vincent asked softly

"The painting.. it's beautiful." MC said, smiling shyly

Realizing his painting was exposed in his room, he blushed into a deep shade of red.

He wasn't mentally ready for anyone ESPECIALLY her to see it

It went silent for a moment and they both avoided eye contact

Not being able to take any more of the awkward air, MC went back into character

She started giggling

"W-what are you embarrased for vincent?" MC said surpressing a laugh

"You tell me MC." Vincent said with a chuckle finally melting away from the awkward situation

Eventually they were both laughing full of joy, even everyone was wondering what was going on in vincent's room

Long story short, they are the inseperable ball of joy 😌

Theodorus

He finds it SO iritating but he can't bring himself to hate her

Despite being so annoying she still had that angelic aura that reminded him of vincent

He already finds the mansion's residents irritating (except vincent ofc) and they arent even as energetic as MC

Wont admit that he adores her at the same time

"HONDJE! For the last time, shut up!" Theodorus shouted, his head poking out of his bedroom door

He was trying to have his afternoon nap after a long day of wheeling and dealing some art.

"Dancing and singing is good for the mind and body! Would you like to join theo?" MC said ignoring his harsh tone

Looking at her with annoyance painted on his face, he glared at her then slammed his bedroom door shut

"Guess he doesn't.." MC said to herself, continuing to sing and dance around

A few hours after that theo payed vincent a visit in his room

He wanted to ask him for advice on how to deal with how loud and energetic MC is

He would have asked arthur but he would most likely give him advice on how to get into her pants

"Come in, what's bothering you?" Vincent invited him, noticing the conflicted look his brother had

Theo sighed folding his arms

"Broer, how do i get hondje to shut up? I keep yelling at her but she never stops" Theo asked, irritation clear in his voice

"Don't call her that! She's a very sweet person" Vincent scolded

"S-sorry broer.." theo appologized looking like a sad puppy

Vincent gestured theo to take a seat next to him

"Well, i understand where you are coming from. She is very energetic indeed." Vincent said

"So..how do i stop her from driving me crazy?" Theo asked

"You say you would yell at her to be quiet right? How about.. you try talking to her VERY nicely" vincent said, emphasizing the word "very"

Theo looked at his brother, confused

"Broer.. are you sure?" Theo asked

"Yes! She is someone you have to speak kindly to for her to listen. Trust your big brother!" Vincent said cheerfully

Vincent ended up teaching theo how to speak to MC the rest of the night

As expected, the next day MC was singing loudly once again

Theo was going to go shout at her but he remembered what his brother said

He gulped and exited his bedroom approaching her

MC who was singing and dancing stopped in her tracks when she noticed a figure standing behind her

She turned around greeted with theo who had a stiff expression

"Good day to you theo! How can i help you?" MC asked cheerfully

"I.. uh hond- i mean MC. C-could you please lower your voice p..please? I am- i'm trying to rest. I would v-very much appreciate y-your coopera..tion." Theo said stuttering allover the place while fidgetting

He wasn't used to being nice to people

It went silent for a bit

"Oh my! How strange, you aren't yelling at me! My appology theo, i didn't know i put you in such distress!" MC said with a guilty expression

Theo was blown away by her response as it just sounded way out of character, making him feel guilty

"O-oh! Don't worry, i appologize for always yelling at you." Theo said flailling his hands all over the place.

MC looked at him and started laughing softly

"O-oi! What are you laughing at hondje!" Theo exclaimed, his face red with embbarasment

Secretly, he felt refreshed after hearing MC laugh again

"Ahaha! My appologies, you just looked and sounded very adorable! It's..ahaha.. very unlike you theo!" MC said, laughing

Theo's brain stopped working, i mean did MC rly just call him adorable

"Whatever! Im going back to my room!" theo stomped away, face still red

"Alright, alright! Have a nice rest! MC said still giggling

Theo slammed his door shut and slumped down against the door

"Maybe.. hondje isn't that bad at all..." theo said to himself

ISAAC

Poor boy will have a mental breakdance

ESPECIALLY when hes reading or doing some cool kid stuff //p h y s i c s

Atleast she doesn't tag along with arthur and dazai...

He knows that she is a kind soul, just has too much energy >:(

He doesnt hate her of course! He just wish she would tone it down :(

Isaac was in the library reading a book when MC started humming while she sweeped the floor

The humming slowly became a string of "lalala" and soon enough she was singing

"Goodness me, MC! This isn't the first time you have distracted my concentration.." isaac said as he burried his face into the book he was reading

Considering how soft isaac's voice was generally, MC did not hear him.

Having enough of it, He shut his book close aggresively and proceeded to walk out the door, slamming the door

The sound of the door slamming alerted MC causing her to jump slightly

"That was really loud..where did isaac go?" MC asked to herself

That was when she heard the door open, revealing leonardo

"Hello leonardo! By any chance, did you come across isaac? He suddenly left and i dont know why..." MC said

Leonardo lit up a cigarrilo and spoke

"Ah yeah, by the looks of it.. you might have upsetted him by accident, cara mia. I saw him stomping through the hallway with a sour look on his face" leonardo said calmly, inhaling his cigarrilo

"W-wait what? I..upsetted him?" MC asked in disbelieve

Leonardo noticed the unsettled look on her face

"Calm down cara mia, here take a seat" leonardo said as he gestured her to take a seat in front of him

MC sat down with a conflicted look on her face

"Heres the thing cara mia- you are a very bright soul and isaac..he is a quiet kid. He finds loud noises distressing especially when he is focussing on something. In this case.. i assume you were singing loudly around him?"

This realization hit MC like a truck

"Oh no! I never meant to make him feel uncomfortable.." MC said sadly

"I need to make it up to him...but how?" Mc continued

Leonardo leaned back to his chair

"Well, as you know, isaac has a monstrous appetite. It will be his meal time in a bit. Maybe you could bring his meal to him and talk things out with him

MC's once gloomy face lit back up

"Thats a great idea! Thankyou very much leonardo!" MC said as she stood up, hurrying out of the library

When MC arrived in the kitchen, he was greeted by sebastian who was plating up some food and rouge.

"Good afternoon sebastian! Is that for isaac?" MC asked

"Indeed, why?" Sebastian asked curiously

"I will take it up to him, since i also have something to discuss with him" MC reasoned

Sebastian stared at her for a bit

"Very well." He said

As soon as sebastian finished plating things up, MC took the tray and headed to isaac's room

She took a deep breath and knocked his door

"Come in." He said calmly

MC went in and placed the tray next to him

Isaac looked up which then his face twisted into discomfort

"Oh..thankyou" he said simply

"Im sorry.." MC said sadly

Isaac's expression showed confussion

"Huh? Why are you apologizing?" He questioned

"You left earlier, because i was bothering you right?" MC questioned back

Isaacs heart melted a bit. He felt like he did something mean considering how he saddened someone who he thought would be the last person in the world to be sad

"Oh! Oh..that.." isaac exclaimed not knowing how to respond to her question

"I really am sorry. I have always been a loud and active person that sometimes i forget about the people around me. I just fall deep into my own world once i do something..." MC explained

Somehow isaac could relate to her words. He knows how it feels to be so engulfed in what you are doing that you just forget about everything else

Maybe her peronality is like his deep interest with physics..

"Dont worry about it... i kind of understand what you mean..im sorry for storming out like that" isaac said, guilt in his voice

It went awkwardly silent for a bit

"Oh! I have an idea! What if... you shout out "gravity" whenever im being too loud around you? Im 100% sure that will alert me!" MC suggested cheerfully

"P-pardon?" Isaac asked unsure if he heard her right

"I guess that was an awfull idea..." MC said as her expression dropped once again

Isaac felt really bad when he saw her sad expression

"N-no! I.. i will think about it.." isaac mumbled, which MC heard

"Really?! Thats great!" MC exclaimed

"So...are we on good terms now?" MC continued

"I suppose you could say so.." isaac said shyly

"Good, good! I will head out now, give me a shout if you need anything" MC said as she left the room

Since then MC and isaac had formed some sort of frienship. Leonardo was glad to see that isaac was finally speaking up, guess its thanks to MC that a tiny portion of her personality slightly rubbed onto him

The day came when MC was being too loud

This time, isaac was playing chess with arthur as dazai watched them

Just like always MC started singing loudly

Isaac took a sharp inhale

"GRAVITYYY" isaac shouted on top of his lung scaring arthur and dazai at the point they probably ascended to a different dimension

"Oh! Sorry isaac!" MC said

"Bloody hell, isaac! I know you came up with the concept of gravity, but what the on earth was that for?!" Arthur said with a hand on his chest that was beating fast

" i think i pooped myself" dazai said as he hurried out of the room holding his butt with his hands.

Isaac stayed quiet, not answering his question

"Back to the game please" isaac said calmly

Arthur just sighed still wondering what all of that was

#ikevamp #ikemen vampire #ikevamp arthur #ikevamp vincent #ikevamp theo #ikevamp isaac #ikevamp headcanon #ikevamp headcanons

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magesup · 4 years

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hello! i uhm well so… i wanted to send in an anonymous ask but i don’t think it’ll let me say as much as i wanted to say, so uhm… im gonna carefully write this post and hopefully it’ll make you happier!! ahah so basically first of all, congrats on 10k!! you deserve this and much much much much mUCH more!! im a new follower… it’s been a few weeks since i chanced upon your tumblr account, and i just saw that you had a twitter account and now i follow you on there and here as well, and well!! hehe im so happy i decided to follow you cause i just love your art style (ill talk about this in a bit fasdf im sorry this is gonna get like really really really long;;) and your comics. but anyways, thank you for working so hard!! i have like zero artistic capability so people who can draw really well just amaze me like woah…. woAH!!! WOAH!!!! WOAH WOW WOW OH MY GOD !!! HOLY SHIT !!! like oh my god the talent, the artistry, the beauty, the love, the etherealness. no but seriously like artists amaze me, and your art is so precious and pretty and i just LOVE how you draw in general. like i personally will never probably get the work that goes into developing an art style that like you are okay with and then drawing and creating ocs and then like coloring and shading and then like line work, but also like other features like hands and bodies and then like the face and the hair as well, so like thank you for your hard work!! like really really really thank you for your hard work ahsdjkfahsdfh

oki but like. this is truly getting longer than i expected, i am sorry if this creepy;; ahskjfahsdf but anyways, you’re really one of my favorite artists ever i think mhm cause !! i just really adore the way you draw like everything like !!! and i also adore how you color things like it’s really unique ( or well at least to me it is ). the way you draw eyes is extremely unique and i just really really really really love it like!! idk how to explain it but like it’s so pretty and i love how you color the eyes like ??? it’s like kinda a gradient towards the inside??? like it’s a darker color to the inside color lines the outer part of the eye and then like a lighter color is inside and then a small white + black circle-like thingy!! and i just. im in love. hfsjkdhfjshdf and also the way you draw the noses and ears ( like you draw ears so well and prettily and lovely ) !! like it’s so cool and just!! you draw hands really prettily too and your clothing is always like on POINT! like the way you color the clothings and htne draw it and all the little details and shadings like … oh my god hKJSDHFSD i just love it so very much!! and i love when you do like chibi(?) form when you make comics. i think it’s the cutest thing ever and im once again so very much in love hKJSHDFDSf like the blush!! and like the eyebrows and like the small circular hands in chibi form. it’s so very cute!! and like your art is just super expressive like you express the emotions of the people who draw so well in your art and i find that wonderful and fascinating hSKJDFHKSJHDf anyways. thank you for always working so hard and for giving me the honor to look at your art and thank you for posting your art!! hehe and anyways im sorry this is really long lmao HKSJDFHKSHD please do not feel the need to post this ahsjkfhkasjdhf it got super long ;; im super sorry!! but once again thank you for your hard work and i really truly sincerely love your art!!

oh shit wait I FORGOT SOMETHING !! I LOVE THE LIGHTING IN YOUR ART !! AND I LOVE HOW YOU UTILIZE THE COLOR WHITE IN YOUR ART LIKE I ABSOLUTELY LOVE IT!! ALRIGHT IM REALLY SORRY HSDKJFHKSDJFHSKJDHF

oh,,,omg…ive received a lot of messages on here but this one is just on a whole other level,, ITS IN THE STRATOSPHERE :OOO!! i dont even know where to begin but first off THANK YOUU ??? OMG????? LOL DA HECK THIS IS SO NICE AND SWEET??? WHO RAISED YOU TO BE SO KIND!!! i was smiling so hard the entire time while reading this and each sentence made my smile grow even wider omg i will never get over this. please ive read this like 3 times over and over the best way i could describe my emotions while reading this is it looks like an exponential graph skyrocketing up TOT <3

i will now address every sentence you made in a bulleted list please join me under the cut

*loses self composure* AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA THANK YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!!! if i could manifest my gratefulness right now it would be the size of the sUN omg i seriously cant tell you how happy this made me cAN I KITH YOU??? *gently kiths*

*coughs* asdsj moving on

the acknowledgement of all the work that goes into creating ??? omg you are a true art enthusiast :,) i too overanalyze my favorite artists styles and can spend literally hours just looking at them in awe so dont feel bad about the long message i love every sentence you wrote TOT and yeah *looks back* it took a long time to get where i am now but im happy where my current level is at! earlier this year i would say my style was at the lizard stage but now i can comfortably say it is at the monkey with a hat stage :D

“favorite artists ever“ *FALLS BACKWARDS* *ANGELS SINGING AS THEY CARRY MY SOUL TO THE HEAVENS* OMGGGGG <333 nuff said that was the final blow

and reading the whole second paragraph, i was CONVINCED that you knew my own style better than i did 0_O like the way you described how i draw eyes i had to look back at my own stuff to check if it was true shdfjkh

and “unique” *doubles over* *clutches heart* thats one of my weaknesses TOT <3 that means so much to me im sure i mentioned this before but i think my styles pretty generic :,0 so hearing this makes me super happy (but i feel like every creator thinks that so its all good :D)

and noses, ears, and hands!!! bruv all the detail you pay attention to is just *ugly sobbing* im so touched omg TOT i love drawing ears and hands :,)

and thank you clothing is my favorite part to shade!!! just getting in all those folds is *clenches fist*,,,so satisfying

and thank you so much for loving the chibis TOT in all honesty i just do most of my comics in chibi cause im too lazy to draw them in my regular style skdskd the blush, eyebrows, and circle hands are critical to make a good chibi TVT circle hands >>> regular hands

and expressions!!!! omg you really think that?? bruv thats so sweet oh my god. i only know how to draw like 3 types of smiles TOT i think the fact that when i draw a certain expression i also emulate expression on my own face helps somehow ahahaaa

AND AAA THANK YOU!!! i love using white lighting it makes the colors pOP 0_o (although lately i have been lazy in using it adfsjd) (and i also have too many arts with just white backgrounds TOT)

and no please dont apologize!!! thank you so much for sending such a long heartfelt message omg it made me really really really really really happy T_T i will continue to work hard and get better and post more art!!! (ง •̀_•́)ง as soon as my sats and college applications are over my power limiters will be gone and i will draw myself into an oblivion :D

(also sorry this took so long to answer i wanted to accurately show my gratitude and appreciation for your message *tears up*)

#i say that as if i havent taken longer to answer to asks before T_T #sincerely from all of my heart thank you once again omg this made me smile so much #thanks for the ask~#nctyz #thanks for the submission~#theres no way i can possibly convey how thankful i am through just words on a screen but im sending you all my love <3 #submission

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somnilogical · 4 years

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transfem protestors released info that moved 350000$ of donations from miri. because miri is an evil org, they decided to lie about why they think it happened and say its really confusing. i know the answer to this ~mystery~, i know why this year was different; i can talk about it in public, they cant. cuz im freeee from CDT PR. i can decide to lazily choose an algorithm that optimizes utility in multiverse, not just institute whatever choice seems to give most utility "going forward".

<<Our fundraiser fell well short of our $1M target this year, and also short of our in-fundraiser support in 2018 ($947k) and 2017 ($2.5M). It’s plausible that some of the following (non-mutually-exclusive) factors may have contributed to this, though we don’t know the relative strength of these factors:>>

https://web.archive.org/web/20200214061634/https://intelligence.org/2020/02/13/our-2019-fundraiser-review/

they then go on to list eight pretty thin excuses. you know perfectly well why this year is different from all other years, MIRI. your ""speculations"" are fake.

a small group of transfems moved ~350,000$ from your ineffective charity.

i suppose eight of these factors also account for why CFAR extended their fundraiser 5 days longer than announced after donations were super low?

or maybe there is a more compact generator for both of these events: whistleblowers protested what you have been doing releasing lots of marginal information and donors saw this.

i know why this year is different, you know why this year is different. Colm Ó Riain you are facilitating MIRI lying, hoping that if one doesnt mention something, people wont pay attention to it.

like lying in such a way that you wouldnt be held legally culpable, because you could say in front of a court with low schelling reach "you cant prove what i was thinking". except i dont care about legal culpability, i care about causal entanglement. you heard about the protests (or, much less likely, were kept from hearing about these protests somehow by a distributed version of this algorithm set one personstep back), you have > 1/100 intelligence. your omission of this is deception.

is <<In past years, when answering supporters' questions about the discount rate on their potential donations to MIRI, we've leaned towards a "now later" approach. This plausibly resulted in a front-loading of some donations in 2017 and 2018.>> really more plausible than "there was an entire protest against MIRI and CFAR's support of UFAI. people reacted strongly to this, it shows up in the donations.¹"?

it would have come up on a list that scrapes the bottom of the barrel for plausible causes in a counterfactual world in which you werent optimizing for good PR. an AU in which you were searching for and publicising how things were causally entangled.

¹see, for instance, the Patrick LaVictoire who had aggregate donations of:

25,885$ november 26 2018

35,885$ august 29 2019

117,199$ february 14 2020

giving diffs of 10,000$ and 81,314$ to estimate 2018 and 2019 donation periods. iirc at some point the diff was 81,000$, id guess at some point afterwards they donated \floor{100π}$. https://web.archive.org/web/20200601000000*/https://intelligence.org/topcontributors/

and then went on to do the standard antitransfem thing calling ziz a "gross uncle" style abuser who just wants status like brent.

https://pastebin.com/TUZ7EThz

with their evidence being someone kaj said it, and kaj's evidence being that ziz said:

<<> I asked Person A if they expected me to be net negative. They said yes. After a moment, they asked me what I was feeling or something like that. I said something like, “dazed” and “sad”. They asked why sad. I said I might leave the field as a consequence and maybe something else. I said I needed time to process or think. I basically slept the rest of the day, way more than 9 hrs, and woke up the next day knowing what I’d do. [...]

> In the case that I’d be net negative like I feared, I was considering suicide in some sense preferable to all this, because it was better causal isolation. However, despite thinking I didn’t really believe in applications of timeless decision theory between humans, I was considering myself maybe timelessly obligated to not commit suicide afterward. Because of the possibility that I could prevent Person A and their peers from making the correct decision for sentimental reasons. [...]

> I was very uncomfortable sharing this stuff. But I saw it as a weighing on the scales of my personal privacy vs some impact on the fate of the world. So I did anyway. [...]

> I tried to inner sim and answer the question. But my simulated self sort of rebelled. Misuse of last judge powers. Like, I would be aware I was being “watched”, intruded upon. Like by turning that place into a test with dubious methodology of whether I was really a delusional man upon which my entire life depended, I was having the idea of Heaven taken from me. [...]

> I made myself come up with the answer in a split second. More accuracy that way. Part of me resisted answering. Something was seriously wrong with this. No. I already decided for reasons that are unaffected. that producing accurate information for person A was positive in expectation.>>

which doesnt sound at all like brent or other people ive encountered who were chronically angsty about status.

im going to write more about this and others in another post but like okay:

[1] ppl with high current or natal testosterone (centrally but not exclusively cis men) keep doing this thing where they mind-project that everyone else has the same degree of status sensitivity and unreflecticity upon it as them when actually this is hormonally mediated.

ziz has a natally & currently estrodized brain and from my observations doesnt have that submodule testosteronized. people with PCOS like ilzo have mentioned that they had masculinized status sensitivity modules, lex somni and some cis guy all tried increasing testosterone and noticed status-sensitivity went up, without looking for this effect in the first place. there are papers on it. your experiences are not universal.

[2] but also this isnt really a "belief", its a coordination mechanism. in the same way "its in black peoples nature to be servile" was a coordination mechanism for slavery rather than a "belief". humans actually can use evidence efficiently and see, for instance, in the antebellum south that black people were human just the same as anyone else. but the local social positionality and what they valued made it more advantageous to verbally report otherwise.

similarly for any minority. "*phobia" is the wrong word, its not fear its a schelling coordination mechanism that humans can expect most of society to have their backs on when bad times happen. which tracks what social justice theorists mean by this stuff being "structural". its not about some emotion of hatred or fear against the specific phenotype of "black skin" or "gender divergence" its about what humans can coordinate against.

hence the use of "antitransfem" instead of "transphobia", i picked this up from ziz and gwen and later noticed it mirroring the form of "antiblack". i wonder if antiblack was coined after encountering a similar issue.

[3] you parted with a marginal 71,000$ (compared to what id expect in a counterfactual world without a protest given your lifetime donation total was 35,885$ and you donated 10,000$ last year.) to protect a UFAI org. is this not an amazing amount of "subservience" to MIRI? anarchotransfems getting together to protest the present omnicide isnt "subservience". the transfems protesting against google being evil werent "subservient", but the employees at google who fired them out were.

its amusing watching this one narrative being tiled everywhere, but with different targets. the authoritarians did the same thing to emma goldman. ▘▕▜▋ says emma and somni are haxing a clueless ziz to "bully" people, linta said somni was infohazardously corrupting people, CFAR affiliates say ziz was 'whipping people into a frenzy' and 'demanding subservience' from them. im going to write a post about this.

#more institutional gaslighting #justice justice #这个时候你在路上遇到的所有人都是向你索命的孤魂野鬼 #why is this year different from all other years #lots of people at miri besides this person looked over their post and did nothing

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weaverlings · 5 years

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(so this is super long and mainly about WTNV because that’s the part I understand, or... at least have spent a lot of time thinking about, but there’s definitely a heavy component of comparison between the two series in this)

@vildflower said: I’ve been thinking how wtnv and tma approach similar concepts of vaguely otherworldly entities who are only somewhat connected to the universe that they seem to operate in vs. the universe that they seem to exist in

so this is all super interesting stuff thank u!!!! I just needed to get to the computer to go over it properly bc tbh it deserves it

vildflower said: like,, tma has the whole concept of rituals and avatars whereas wtnv could arguably have. a hierarchy? like when you think about it;; huntokar, the distant prince, the woman from italy, even the great golden hand, are ancient and possibly the closest to ‘gods,’ who dont interact w nightvale often but either have vested interest in it or are able to interact w it more easily due to number of reasons as compared to, like, the rest of the world?

Part of the reason I listened to The Magnus Archives in the first place was because I’d heard hints of the connection between belief (fear specifically, as it happened) and reality, and the tangible effects that this connection has. I have pretty much always interpreted Night Vale along similar lines, but now having listened to TMA... I don’t feel like the execution is all that similar?

While the lines are super fun to draw, WTNV doesn’t have such clear divisions or, well... I guess TMA didn’t, either, but I don’t think WTNV does have such clear organizational structure?

I think the/a key difference between WTNV and TMA is that not all of the entities of Night Vale necessarily tie back into an overarching force, or at least... the same overarching force. Which you go into, but that’s just such a core aspect of TMA that it at least feels pretty distinct.

And the gods of Night Vale, I think, all have a much clearer and even more “relatable” sentience than the Powers. The gods have trouble communicating with other people, in various ways, but they also, say, express regret or ask for coffee when they do communicate.

vildflower said: and then theres the smiling god who could be said to be in a category of his own, or even perhaps in the same category as cecil- the way the smiling god’s existence seems to be in direct connection to desert bluffs/the joyous congregation and cecil seems to ‘depend’ on nightvale and its residents. or maybe it would be more accurate to equate station management and the smiling god, both finding ways to communicate w their respective towns through 'avatars’: cecil & kevin.

Yeah! If being a “Voice” means anything, I do think it would be related to these gods... I guess it would’ve been Huntokar, once, for Cecil. (And now, well... I don’t know. But if bloodstone worship is just happening, that’s a lot of undirected faith, and I feel like it needs to go somewhere... or to something.) And yup, for Kevin, it would be the Smiling God.

However, one thing I’m hoping we’ll see from this arc is addressing the fact that what the Joyous Congregation THINKS is the Smiling God is apparently really different from what it actually is. Even some of the church elders - the actual pastor - believed that it was the centipede, and this would seem to indicate that’s not true.

I mean, if nothing else It Devours! was pretty clear about the fact that the centipede was just an animal, so I don’t see it or anything like it having plotted or directed someone to exploit people’s brains for labor in the future

So I wouldn’t put the Smiling God in the same category as Cecil, or even Kevin, but I think Cecil and Kevin occupy the same category like you said...

For what it’s worth, I’ve always thought of Cecil more like an “oracle” (even before Alice Isn’t Dead!!) - giving advice or answering questions, kind of a guide, if in a sort of opaque or enigmatic way, whether he wants to be or not. And then Kevin is more like a prophet - offering a vision of how things should be, giving commandments, etc, regardless of what people might ask for or what would help them.

vildflower said: continuing this heirarchy the next lower tier would perhaps be city council and the librarians which have pretty fixed, smaller areas of direct interaction w nightvalians. there’s also the spire! which sounds quite similar to the spiral, i think….

I think that’s a good example of how it’s different... “Barks” sounded like the kind of thing that could have been related to the Spiral, that sort of distortion. But the purpose was different - the Spire wanted to bargain, and from the sound of it it’s a lot more open about its demands (iirc: Night Valian “Thanksgiving” involves going out to thank the Spire for its “mercy”). It’s also a known destination.

People in Night Vale know what it is to them. They may not know what it is exactly, but they do know the role it plays in their community. So while it absolutely fits into the structure of Night Vale, I don’t think it’s that similar beyond some (admittedly major) aesthetic elements?

All of those forces in Night Vale, the librarians and the council etc, while indeed forces and while they definitely relate to the human citizens in weird ways... they’re still citizens.

The Powers are TIED to the world of TMA, but an explicit part of it is that they’re fundamentally alien to it, too, and basically need to be forced in.

vildflower said: but yeah,, hope you don’t mind the long rant rip aksk but at this point I’m pretty sure one could draw up a list of some 15 nightvale entities too lmao

(fdsdgh no you don’t need to apologize, I loved it and I’ve been thinking about this kind of thing a lot anyway too!!)

vildflower said: HOW COULD I FORGET! the glow cloud interacts w an even smaller group of people (the PTA) than the city council + angels!! I’d say they’re actually at the lowest rung cause they seemed to only be interested in josie; maybe their attachment to them in turn lead to be attached to nightvale even after she died?

actually the Glow Cloud works w/ the school board and seems to end up in conflict w/ the PTA and I only remember this because I was checking on it for something recently oops.

ALSO THE ANGELS... YEAH THAT’S NEAT because!! they’re the only part of this that has an explicit connection to belief in canon!!

“They are all named Erika with a K. All angels are equal to all other angels. They share all memories and all physical sensations. They experience everything simultaneously. Their minds are overwhelmed with enlightenment and pain.

“They have no centralized leadership, but they do have committees, lots of committees. These committees do not have titles nor objectives. The committees simply emerge as needed...

“Angels have no bodies, only visual projections of winged, barely humanoid forms. These forms are dreamed up by those who see and acknowledge them, and may vary based on the viewer.

“The secret hierarchy of angels is an ethereal mass of feelings and thoughts made manifest by necessity. They’re only individual beings because we imagine them so, but they are collectively beings.”

But I think, yeah... Night Vale is, at its core, a community. And the worldbuilding of WTNV reflects that, even to the extent that belief is involved. I mean, really, the world does run on “belief” it’s just not a supernatural thing... We believe in the necessity of our social structures, so we create and act on them.

And that’s what happens in Night Vale, it’s just that in Night Vale, a divine Glow Cloud runs the school board and the librarians will eat you. All the “forces” that we expect are there. Even though they’re strange (to us, at least), it’s all centered around the maintenance of a community. TMA has a much larger scope.

theres that whispering forest too and omg the desert otherworld, and the black star in ‘a story about you’ & other episodes; entities that manifest more as locations than sentient beings?

So yes!! Night Vale as a place is definitely a gathering point for the weird. I think of Hiram’s favorite memory in this context, too - Hiram was happy in Night Vale because he could just live, for a while, anyway. Or at least, when people were upset, they weren’t upset by his nature as a five-headed dragon (who cares, right?) but because of what he did)

It does have a clear structure, but it’s not the same kind that the Powers operate under - WTNV (depending on interpretation, and none of it is canon tbh, as much as I love it) and TMA are both very different explorations of the connection between belief and reality.

Like the Whispering Forest is... well, apparently it’s its own town now. But it was sort of the local weird forest; it was... a citizen, maybe. In the way, indeed, that the Glow Cloud still is! It just wants to live (and grow. and expand) and Night Vale is a place it can do that.

The Desert Otherworld seems to be connected to the Smiling God, although we don’t know much about how or why or if it’s always been that way. Dana saw some things, though, like when she almost forgot herself in the image of a triangle (iirc), not to mention the rumbling and whatever’s up with the Mudstone Abyss... And then it does have its connection to Night Vale, too, through the Dog Park... There’s a LOT going on w/ the Otherworld; that’s basically its own post dsfdgfdg

And the dark planet lit by no sun is like. I admit I’ve never thought of it in the same light as the other things before! So I’d want to do that before going into it but that raises some SUPER interesting possibilities and if you have more thoughts I’d love to hear them! It definitely merits that further consideration.

So in summary: TMA has rituals and avatars, and WTNV has community. I think.

#welcome to night vale #wtnv #the magnus archives #wtnv spoilers #tma spoilers #spoilers #kevin //#smiling god //

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nvrissa · 5 years

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hello laid ease and furries ( u know who u are )......hahaha....are u ready for this ? zimzalabim ! my name is xan ( she/her pronouns ) and my laptop has been broken for a good 3 years now i have to use an onscreen keyboard so if u see me typing for 20000 years on discord only to send u a single sentence u know whats up x JSDBJWBJW here is the intro....im really winging this no one call me out for that WOOO....tw: medication, mental health, body image ? perhaps just to be safe <3

ok ! so im not gonna talk too much abt family stuff bc yuno and i are doing the collab of the century here and art takes time people ! JSBDJBWDJW but so u get a good idea...i will write a little abt it lets get it

so the kwons were two of the biggest faces in hollywood ( and tbh they are still considered icons / hollywood royalty no matter how old they get they stay #Relevant ) think bradgelina ! literally everyone knows who the kwons if u dont u probably live under a rock /:

their parents are very into the fame thing...so when it came to their kids ( nari and wolfe ) they SUPER pushed the famous life onto them, really expecting both of them to be just as obsessed and enamored by the public. idk if u guys ever say that vid of gigi and bella hadid before they were huge were their mom was pressuring them both to get into modeling and to stay skinny and to be stars etc....it was kinda like that !

so narissa, being the first born, really just internalized that shit...like imagine being told ever since u were a baby that fame and status and ur last name are wildly important and not being able to remember a time when u werent being watched by cameras / a third party ( the public ) bc that was her life ! nari has....no experience as to what life is like without cameras and without having to create this image of herself that ppl are gonna be into

obviously that’s NOT normal....and it had it’s toll on her /: as a kid she grew up so fast like u know those kids that seem so mature and wise for their age ? that was nari. she always had two versions of herself: inside nari vs outside nari. she was so good at being good just bc she knew what stuff to express and what stuff to keep inside ( spoiler alert: most of it was kept in x )

she is still very much desperate to please her parents despite it all /: i feel like for a long time she kinda excepted and agreed that fame is everything ( hence why shes known for using her last name to get her places ) but shes starting to realize just how FUCKED it all is and just how much it’s messed her up so stay tuned for more fun !

ok so career stuff ! nari started off as a child model bc she was um super cute and super good at knowing what to do / not freaking out in front of cameras <3 but she was always obsessed with actors ! she used to sit in front of the tv for hours legit study and memorize ppls mannerisms and various movie lines.. she was literally always just quoting random lines / imitating various actors so often her parents were like ok word go act !

she landed her first role at 12 and it was a pretty huge role as a lead chara in a mini television series that revolved around a cast of kids ( think stranger things but not plot wise just how some of the mains were kids ) with zero acting experience before hand ... so it was pretty clear to the media nari got the spot bc she was a kwon ! there was a bunch of controversy around the show before it came out but once it was released...there was no denying nari had talent

after that it was just a whirlwind of acting doors opening up for her. everyone wanted nari bc of her last name and all the attention that came from it, not to mention every director wanted to be The One that helped narissa kwon become one of the most famous actresses of the 21st century. most of the time she was getting cast for selfish reasons but nari never realized it /: she was just happy to be acting bc it really was like therapy for her to become different ppl

flash forward to age 15 when narissa was finally diagnosed with generalized anxiety disorder and was prescribed meds to help ! it was actually a director from a movie she was working on that suggested to her parents nari might be struggling after witnessing her have a panic attack on set. not wanting a scandal, her parents agreed it was best to get her “help” which included pills and weekly therapy !

so nari actually didnt mind it too much tbh she HAD been struggling for a while she just assumed her anxiety was normal and just like something all famous ppl were dealing with but that wasnt the case. she was hesitant to open up to her therapist just bc she was still obsessed with this idea of inside nari vs outside nari, and she was very scared to cross that line so it took....years of sessions to build up that trust

as she got older though and as she got more famous, everyone just assumed she was better. she was more famous and loved by the day, she had become a chanel ambassador ( thank u jennie x ), her interviews on youtube always brought in record views, she’d started in plenty of movies critics agreed would become cult classics, her social medias were nearing kardashian level in terms of followers: everything was on track....

....except nari had actually never been more unstable. she had become so dependent on her meds she couldnt go anywhere or talk to anyone without popping a few in. all the watching eyes were starting to make her paranoid, not to mention the pressure from her parents ( who couldn’t be happier with nari being so famous ) was at its all time high. she had been nominated for an oscar at 21 and everyone was expecting her to win...and then she didnt

narissa kwon famously fainted at the 2018 oscars after it was announced she had lost the award. her actual fainting wasnt caught on camera or televised, but it WAS witnessed by some of the most relevant names and faces in hollywood who were in that room. the scandal took the media by storm, the hashtag #getwellnarissa trending for over 42 hours until a statement was released she had fainted bc of dehydration and other undisclosed causes and that she was okay & currently taking it easy at home surrounded by family

in reality it was the abuse of her medication as well as all the stress, but when your last name is kwon manipulating the press is as simple as making the right phone call. unfortunately for nari and her parents, the article about the brat pack came out a week later, and there was no manipulating that source /:

for narissa, it was all a wake up call. she decided to go off her anxiety meds altogether. after falling out with the brat pack she spent that year trying to figure out who she was separate from her fame and her last name. despite some offers from a few casting directors ( surprisingly some people still wanted her despite the scandals bc she was still a kwon, after all ) narissa rejected every role except one in a coming of age indie movie that explores womanhood and mental health as well as strained relationships with mothers. the movie is set to release sometime mid august hehe (~:

she agreed to come to milan to reunite with the brat pack bc she’s still searching for herself ! nari figures the people who quite literally grew up with her might give her some answers......not to mention there is still a part of her who is desperate to reclaim the image and status she had before everything fell apart </3

PERSONALITY/TIDBITS

narissa is....complicated to say the least. growing up in front of the cameras and in a family who prioritized fame and outside opinions of you as the most important thing, she is quite literally desperate for praise and approval. because she legit has no idea what parts of her are real and what parts of her she’s created for her public persona, she often looks for understanding in others!! shes very very good at analyzing people and understanding people in the hopes that its gonna make her better at analyzing herself, but to no avail.

libra sun capricorn moon !! THIS is super accurate and telling if u wanna read but i kinda just summarized it in the last bullet

she is such a perfectionist with everything she does and a bit of a control freak in the sense that if she’s not the one doing something, she doesnt have faith whatever that is will be able to live up to her unrealistic standards. directors are often concerted with nari bc whenever she gets big roles.....she is so hard on herself, often asking for take after take bc she monitors every little thing abt her expression or her movements. she’s often left frustrated and disappointed with herself bc again, her standards are SUPER unrealistic ):

she’s relatively sweet!! growing up with the brat pack they probably knew her as the life of the party, very bubbly, confident, and very easy to have fun with as long as you’re being tolerable. however, she can get kind of opinionated at times so it’s very hard for you to gain her trust and respect back if you lose it. she’s also prone to random mood swings / periods of isolation, but whenever she returns its with a big smile and a soft voice assuring you everything is okay

very good at lying and deceiving ppl but she hardly ever does it on purpose ( unless her publicists asks her too ). she’s carried this persona / public image of herself curated for consumption from others for so long, sometimes she has no idea when she’s being sincere or if she’s just convincing herself she’s being sincere. most of the time she only deceives other people about herself. she can come across as kind of elusive because of this ( think daisy from gatsby’s perspective ) but it’s not on purpose. she just legit has no true sense of self isnt that sexy?

speaking of sex. JWDBJWBDJWBD she also uses that as a coping mechanism / a weird affirmation that yes, she IS wanted by others and yes she IS seen as someone beautiful and that she IS something to be consumed by others ( like i said in my tags....male fantasies male fantasies ) but then at the same time she feels guilty abt this and so unsatisfied and disgusted at how she’s living her life as an object / manifestation of other people’s projections rather than as a normal person...rip </3 its a cycle

ever since her relationship with micah that was so hated by the public it actually ruined and ended their relationship, nari has been too scared to publicly have a relationship again. the media seems to love seeing her on casual dates with other stars, but not to see her tied down to one person, as that kind of “damages” this super accessible persona she’s put out ( think idols and why they cant date )

she loves poetry, french music, all of marilyn monroe and audrey hepburn’s movies, nonfiction essays abt womanhood and identity, anything chanel, is particularly fond of silk dresses but is partial to velvet as well, wears lacy bralettes under everything bc it makes her a little more confident, actually prefers large parties to small ones because small gatherings are more personal therefore give her more anxiety, would only eat fruit and drink champagne if she could live like that, doesn’t know how to swim so she’s scared of the ocean as well as the dark, used to study ballet as a kid and misses it terribly, doesn’t know how to drive and isn’t planning to learn, can be materialistic at times, is probably an introvert masquerading as an extrovert for 22 years now, the only movies she cant stand are westerns, loves to travel but is scared of flying, doesn’t drink coffee, and is allergic to nuts.

last but most important fact about narissa is that she loves her brother wolfe more than anything in this world so messing with him is the only way nari is bound to 100% hate you. she can bully him all she wants ( ex. starting very real rumors he IS in fact a furry ) but no one else is aloud to actually be mean to him or she will kill you

also very random but i had a hc that when she was 6 and her pet cat jinx died she caused enough fuss at home her parents actually made it a national holiday in about thirteen different states. the anniversary of this death is december 4th and yes . the brat pack better mourn jinx with nari every year......

pls spare plots im sorry this is so long.....JBDJBWJDBWJBWDJBJ i promise it will be worth it also im sensitive and very small ... how can u say no ?

#bratsintro #╰ ♡ . 𝒎𝒂𝒍𝒆 𝒇𝒂𝒏𝒕𝒂𝒔𝒊𝒆𝒔 𝒎𝒂𝒍𝒆 𝒇𝒂𝒏𝒕𝒂𝒔𝒊𝒆𝒔 ── ooc !#yes this tag is inspired by the margaret atwood quote....bc i am Literally haunted by it #so is nari x #also this gif ? inspired by her furry brother<3 #this intro is a whole mess pls . plot with me anyway ?#THIS IS RIDICULOUSLY LONG HOLY SJBWJBJWBDJW yea i...am so sorry oy my god

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clexacon · 6 years

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Here’s a full transcript of the UnConventional episodes featuring Natasha Negovanlis and Elise Bauman.

Huge thank you to Rebecca Soileau for doing this transcription for ClexaCon!

Opening Song

“Give me someone who loves like me, up there on the tv or movie, anything would do. Cause I’ve learned surviving isn’t living, we deserve way more than a brief romance on an episode or two, we deserve something unconventional”

Hey there Clexacon-ers! Welcome to another episode of “Un-CON-ventional”, the ClexaCon podcast! I am your host as always, Dana Piccoli and we are less than 2 months out from ClexaCon 2018! Can you even handle it? Before we head into this really really fabulous episode which I’m really excited to share with you, I do have a couple things I just want to tell you. On March 1st, which is coming up very very soon, tickets go on sale for “Breakfasts with Clexacon Guest”. And that is something you do not want to miss if you can score a ticket to. You’re going to be able to possibly be able to meet Katherine Barrell, Dominique Provost-Chalkley, Tamara Duarte, Emily Andras, Anna Silk, Natasha Negovanlis and Elise Bauman. What an incredible opportunity to dine and dish with some of your favorite, favorite stars! So keep that on your calendar, March 1st, tickets go on sale and they are going to go fast. Also on sale, speaking of good stuff, ClexaCon has added some really really cool new merch to there store! They’ve got slick, black on black and blue on blue “ClexaCon 18” shirts, they also have new hats and all sorts of cool stuff so check out there store, just click on the little store button all the way on right of their ClexaCon website and there you go and you’ll be looking ah-mazing!

I don’t want to keep these guests from you any longer because I know that your super amped about it so, we are going straight into my interviews with Natasha and Elise! Here we go!

I am very very happy to introduce my guest for this episode of “Un-CON-ventional” because they are 2 of my favorite people in the world, you know them, you love them, Natasha Negovanlis and Elise Bauman...LADIES! Thank you for being here!

Elise: I’m giving us a round of applause

Natasha: Thanks for having us

Dana: I mean come on, it was a given right? I’m gonna throw a monkey wrench into this whole thing, so dear listeners, I am not going to ask these actresses, these multi talented creative types, anything about their flagship Carmilla. No i am not.

Elise: Whaaat?!

Natasha: Whatt?!

Dana: Because I don’t know if you know this but these guys are going to be doing a “Hollstein” panel at ClexaCon so there’ll be lots and lots of Carmilla questions there. So this, this is my version of the actors studio and i'm just going to ask them all sorts of weird ass questions, and hopefully some thought provoking questions, so you can get to know them a little better as people. How do you feel about that lades?

Natasha: I feel fantastic about it

Elise: Very excited

*laughter*

Dana: Alright! So my first question: this is for both of you...

Natasha: Ok

Dana: What would you tell your 15 year old self now, if you could go back in time?

Natasha: You know what, I was thinking about this recently, actually, haha, I was thinking about it bc I was taking a painting class with my mom and I was thinking about how i'm more a creative person than someone who can follow instructions and I think if I could go back in time I would maybe tell my 15 year old self that she doesn't have to go to university. Um, here in Canada, university and college are different things, so what we call university, I guess yall call college but college and university are different here so usually when your very academic and a straight A student, it’s expected that you go to university to get a degree. But I think that um yea, I think I would tell my 15 year old that it would be ok to like go to an acting school or go do a diploma program instead. That being said, I don't have any regrets. But I think I would tell myself and also tell young people now that it's ok if you learn differently from others. Yea, I don’t know something that just popped into my head recently.

Elise: I am into it. And I would probably tell young Elise that she could just skip over the vegan stage that she was in for a brief while.

*laughter*

Elise: There was like a year and ½ that I just went without dairy and you know like why? Why..

Dana: You would tell young Elise to eat that ice cream girl, eat it!

Elise: Cheese is a great invention. I understand that humans are like probably incapable of digesting it very well and like it probably really bad for environment and like cheese pizza is a great thing so that’s probably the sage wisdom I would gift young Bauman.

Dana: *laughing* I would expect nothing less from you Elise. So eat cheese.

Elise: Eat the dairy, don’t forgo the yogurt. The whole course of my life could’ve been very different. I’m kidding. It was great, it was a great time. Nothing against vegans, vegans are great people! Gonna get a lot of backlash for this.

Dana: Now’s she’s backtracking. *laughing* So speaking of food, if you and Natasha were attending a dinner party, what do you think the other one would bring?

Natasha: oohh

Elise: I would say Natasha would maybe, I mean this is a little on the nose, but maybe like a greek salad.

*laughing*

Elise: But like a REAL greek salad! Like real, authentic feta cheese and all that good stuff. Either that or she would go straight to like a meat platter. Be like alot of cured...

Dana: Just like lamb on a stick or something?

Elise: No it would be, like it would be really nice. She would have hand selected a bunch of really nice meats and pickles and cheeses and she’d thrown like, a good platter.

Dana: So she’d be like the queen of charcuterie?

Elise: Charcuterie! Thats what its called. Yea yea yea, she would do that. It would be on a really nice wooden board or something.

Natasha: Ooohhh that’s very accurate. I think I would do something like that or at least some ingredients for someone else’s charcuterie board, for sure. Some like, preserves or something. Um yea i don't think I’d bring a salad because no one likes the girl who brings the salad

*laughing*

Natasha: Also it would be a little be cheap of me too, you know? I think, to let it impress. Also I have a secret, culturally i'm not greek, but I do make a mean greek salad, my family's macedonia.

Dana: Macedonia!

Natasha: So the food is actually terrible, it's like boiled potatoes and overcooked flavorless meat.

Elise: Nobody wants to be the girl with salad, but especially nobody wants to be the girl with the boiled potatoes.

“laughing”

Natasha: Yea I brought you some boiled potatoes, hahaha. I think that Elise would bring like some hummus, some appetizers for before dinner. Like some really good hummus, maybe some kale chips, or she would just bring her own separate meal that she would eat out of her own tupperware while everyone else is eating. Which like I secretly do admire because I wish that I had Elise’s discipline. No or she��d surprised everyone and bring a really nice dessert actually, like a good pie.

Elise: Ooohhh yea! I baked a pumpkin pie recently, it was a good time.

Natasha: Yea

Elise: Yea, alright I like that, I like that. I think we should throw a dinner party. I think that's really where this is going.

All: yea!

Elise: Make a mental note, make sure Elise doesn't bring kale chips

Dana: Alright Natasha, what's the biggest misconception about you?

Natasha: I think the biggest misconception is that i'm extremely vain and/or high maintenance. And I was thinking about this, I don’t know if its my bone structure or what but I was thinking about this recently and its interesting that a lot of people who take care of their appearance, or are really good at self care are perceived as high maintenance because my being good at taking care of myself means that i dont need alot from other people! Know what im sayin?

Elise: Ha. “know what im sayin.”

Natasha: I think that would be one. I’m not so fancy. I think that's the biggest misconception that i’m fancier-

Elise: She's into fancy cured meats but nothing else.

Natasha: ...that im fancier than i am, but i mean,

Dana: But she’s not like using them as facial hydration or like...

Elise: Yea.

Natasha: That's what i use greek salad for.

*laughter*

Dana: It’s astringent, it works.

Dana: What about you Elise, what is the biggest misconception about you?

Elise: Mmmm, I think probably somewhere around, I think people think im only ever a positive person, which may be a bit of a far stretch sometimes (she says laughing). I think I have a lot more aggression than people realize,

Dana: “Although she is little, she is fierce” is what you’re saying?

Elise: Yea something like that.

Dana: Do you have a punching bag, something you can work with?

Elise: I don't have a punching bag, I just signed up for soccer again! I signed up for a soccer team.

Natasha: That's awesome

Elise: Yeah I used to play soccer from maybe like 10 until high school and I loved it and it was definitely my sport and then I, well i just stopped playing after high school because there weren't many opportunities to play. And I have terrible knees, but that's not stopping me so i'm going to go do another stint at soccer. Just for fun. I think I need that outlet. I think I really need to get back to my tomboy roots. I've been feeling that way a lot lately. I’m like “why am I trying so hard to be this other thing? I don't know.” So I’m going to go back on the field.

Dana: I love how this shit got really deep right there.

*laughter*

Dana: See there was a method to my madness guys! Ok so, what is the question that you’ve always wanted an answer to, but have yet to get one?

Elise: What happens after we die? Like thats been a huge one since I was a kid.

Dana: I think that's pretty fair.

Elise: I thinks that's really what is the meaning, why am I here, what the point, what’s the purpose?

*laughing*

Elise: You know, things like that, generally what I think about on a Wednesday afternoon.

*laughing*

Elise: Natasha?

Natasha: I was just going to say, how one changes their fitted sheet when they are by themselves?

Elise: Or.. How one folds a fitted sheet!? That is something would love an answer to.

Natasha: Yes. Im sure there are YouTube tutorials for this, but putting a fitted sheet on a bed when you're one person is so tricky. Because as soon as you tuck one side in, the other side lifts up..or like putting your duvet cover on.

Elise: Oh yea

Dana: Oh the worst! And then you get trapped in the duvet cover when your by yourself

Natasha: Yea!

Dana: Then you just hope someone comes to the door, like UPS.

Elise: That one i figured out, you have to like lie the whole thing down on your floor and then take the two corners and then like pull it over and it's a logs and anyway...

Natasha: The germaphobe in me does not like that. I’d think of the dog and it would be like, ugh on my floor. Although he does sleep in my bed technically, so what's the difference?

Elise: Oh yea a dog.

Dana: I’d introduce you to my dog right now but she's currently snoring and farting, simultaneously

*laughing*

Natasha: Amazing!

Dana: Ok ,what are you guys nostalgic about?

Elise: Pogs

Dana: Pogs? Like the little paper things?

Elise: You can get medal ones too or plastic ones

Dana: Oh haha pardon me!

Elise: You were really fancy if you got a metal pog, that’s when you know you made it.

Natasha: Oh yea

Dana: But what’s the purpose of pogs? Like what did pogs do?

Natasha: It was a game!

Elise: Um, elevated, like your self worth as a human. *Laughter* Like you know, feeling really blue today, but let me just look at my pog collection and know I feel alot better about my outlook

Dana: Did you throw them? I don’t, I remember pogs but i didn’t play with them. But what did you do with them? Did you just throw the little pieces of cardboard, excuse me, metal?

Elise: I think you just hoarded them and like compared your pogs to other kids.

Natasha: Nooo it was a game, it was like a serious game guys, there were tournaments!

Dana: Is this, were pogs more popular in Canada? I’m starting to think they were.

Elise: That and Tamagotchis, Tamagotchis were the it thing for a while.

Natasha: Yea

Elise: But I killed all my pets so I wasn’t very good at that one. I would set my alarm and wake up at 3 am and be like “I gotta water this thing again?” and it’d be dead by 7 am the next day. Yeaa

*laughter*

Dana: What about you Natasha? Are you nostalgic about pogs are is there something else that really gets your nostalgia button?

Natasha: Oohh I don’t know, I mean, gosh, I get really nostalgic over children's choral music.

*laughter*

Natasha: I was a choir nerd so I can’t hear children’s choirs without getting very emotional. And then I can’t listen to it. Or like really obscure like choir folk music. Because I used to go, I used to compete in competitions with my choir and like travel across North America and yea. There’s this one cd we have of, it was like, my choir sang with like ten other choirs from all across North America and it was this massive church and we were all, it wasn’t, it just happened to be in a church, they weren't religious choirs, but we were like all along the outside of the aisles and in the balconies and I just remember it was a really cool experience having hundred and hundreds of voices under 12 coming together. So yea, whenever I hear kids choral music, especially around the holiday times if there's something playing. I don't love the holiday season but if there's something with a kids choir I get really nostalgic cause my best childhood memories were surrounded by choir and singing so yea.

Dana: That's really sweet. Alright super serious question here guys, have you ever seen a ghost?

Elise: Yes I have.

Natasha: Whoa what!

Dana: What? Tell us who was it, what ghost was it, where was it? I want details, I want everything.

Elise: I’ve seen a couple ghosts. I was a kid and a lady ghost just flew over my bed one day, well not flew, it was just kind of like there, I don’t know. And then another time I was in a church and I saw a man in like a uniform or something walk by and then I was like what the, so I went into room but there were no doors leading out of that room so I was like “probably a ghost, probably a ghost”.

Dana: Did your sightings of ghosts stop as you got older?

Elise: Yes, yea. I only saw the 2 when I was a kid. Maybe they weren't real, maybe they were figments of my imagination.

Dana: Or you were really intuitive as a kid and you were open to it. I think a lot of kids see things that adults turn their minds off to.

Elise: Totally. I totally think that are other parallel realms going on and we can kind of pop in and out of them occasionally.

Dana: What about you Natasha? Have you ever seen a ghost? A spirit? Poltergeist?

Natasha: No i’ve never seen one, I think i’ve shut myself off to that stuff so. But a medium did once tell me that i had a posse of ghosts around me, she did not use the word posse (laughter) but there were many spirits around me that were not related to me and that I didn’t know and I was like “oh that’s disturbing”

*laughter*

Natasha: Particularly there's this little girl ghost that follows me around and I was like ok, not the most terrifying of the ghosts.

Dana: The good thing is you’re never alone.

*laughter*

Dana: Why aren't they helping you with your f***ing fitted sheet though is my question?

*laughter*

Natasha: Yea, like who’s refilling the ice cube tray, come on ghost posse!

Natasha: But weirdly enough both my mom and my brother saw the same thing in the house I used to live im. They used to see this dark shadow that was darker than a shadow move across my basement wall in the same spot and they hadn't told each other until years later because my brother was a really little kid when he saw it and my mom saw it but she didn't really believe in that stuff. Then like years later my brother had mentioned it and it was really strange that they both saw the same thing without and had described the exact same thing without talking to each other about it. So that was kind of bizarre.

“Scary Music”

Dana: Next question.

Natasha: I like these questions.

Elise: I know. I’m into this I like this. This is fun.

Dana: : Let's talk about failure.

*laugher*

Natasha: Oh great! How much time do we have?

Dana: Says one of the most successful actresses working today. So what is a time that you failed spectacularly but learned a lot?

Elise: Oh god like every day.

Natasha: Yea, I was gonna say, every day

Elise: Im really, this is very interesting. I have like an allergic aversion to failure. I really don't like for people to see me failing in any capacity. Which leads me to put up a front of “I've got it all together, everything's fine, dont worry about a thing”. Which is not always the case because I’m a human being and I don’t think I know any human beings who have it all together. But I was thinking about this the other day. Because the emotion I remember the strongest of being a kid is embarrassment. When I think about times I got embarrassed as a kid, I will still get a flush in my cheeks. For whatever reason, that is still such a pungent thing I can connect to being a kid and I think a driving force has been me trying to avoid that feeling. Which has led me to make safe choices a lot and do things, which really goes against my nature. By nature I’m a person who is a risk taker, who is a person who puts themselves on the line so i'm trying, it's really interesting that your bringing that up, because that’s something i’ve been thinking about a lot the past couple weeks is fearlessness and failure and wanting to really re-evaluate my relationships to those words.

Natasha: Yea, so well said. I think that I also fail on a daily basis but learn from it every time. You know it's interesting because I was also a very studious young person who always wanted to succeed and do really well at things, and I remember when you were talking about nostalgia and we were talking about choirs, I have this memory of me in this voice competition between, I took a year off between highschool and university and I was in this really serious voice competition and I had to sing like 8 different pieces all by memory and four different languages from particular years. It was the most intense thing I had ever done, this huge national competition. And in the middle of one my songs I forgot the words and I forgot the words for the first time ever in my life in the middle of this really intense competition and I stopped. And I remember I wanted to just fall and run out of the room but I just looked over the shoulder and I looked up and I started again and then I did the rest of my piece after that and then of course immediately threw up when I left the room. I was so humiliated than I had ever been, I think that’s my most embarrassing moment that I blocked out for a long time and i’ve never been so so humiliated. But I had to stick around for hours because all these professores were adjudicating it, and I ended up coming in 1st place and I remember being so shocked and the reason why is because of how I was able to recover and it was really amazing. It was a really great lesson just when your talking about failure and what you learn from it. It was a really great lesson in that its ok to make mistakes and its ok to not be perfect and it’s really about how you dealt with it. And I remember how the professors were like “Yes, you forgot the words, but you were able to keep going, even though you wanted to cry, you were able to get through the rest of your pieces flawlessly and you composed yourself so well”. So I think that was a really good lesson in that you don't always have to thrive for perfection all the time.

Elise: Totally

Natasha: Yeah, have little universal reminders of that everyday.

Elise: Even like setting your alarm and sleeping in. I failed, i’ve already failed at the getting up at the time i said i was going to get up. Like there are moments of little failures throughout the day yea risk. That's another thing, i have to risk the failure too.

Dana: Can i share my failure with you?

Both: Yes please!

Dana: So you may know that I used to work at this website and I loved it and I was very devoted and after I did this event for this little show called Carmilla, I came home and I got a phone call from my big boss that my position was going to be eliminated. After I had worked, you know, really really hard to establish myself in this position, and I was so humiliated by it that I didn’t leave my room for 2 days. All I could think was “i’m nothing without this job” like I cease to exist, who Dana Piccoli is ceases to exist now that this job is over. I was so worried what people would think of me, would they think that I sucked, would they think that I wasn’t good at what I was doing and I was so nervous about facing up to it. But what I think I learned through all that is that who I am is more than any job and what I do and what I’m trying to do, what I’m trying to give is bigger than all of that. And I think it really made me a stronger person, it made me a stronger writer, it made me a much more intuitive, empathic person to because I failed spectacularly in front of the internet, and the lesbian and queer internet who I had become very intimately connected with. So, that humiliation, that failure, led to me being who I am today and it's something im proud of and I’m happy with. So thats my big failure that I learned from.

Elise: Your sense of worth and external things, those things can be blown down like a house of cards in an instant and so if I haven’t developed the things that are in me then when those things do inevitably fall down, such as aging, like if I place so much value in my looks then im you know all of a sudden those by nature start to lessen. Um, then yea like I think that's just so on point what you said about how I though i didn’t have any value outside of this external thing. That's something i'm really trying to work on right now too. Like whoa whoa, what have I placed my own value in? And then what is it actually outside of those things, you know? Yea that’s so good.

Dana: Alright, let's go into something slightly lighter than that. What's the best thing you've ever bought yourself with your own hard earned cash? Or loonies, loonies I should say!

And it doesn't have to be a big thing. But it's a thing that your like I bought this with my own damn money and hard work.

Elise: I think for me, maybe not a thing necessarily, but coming to LA for this winter, that's where I am right now, that's been a big thing for me, is taking these few months off of working to be here and really focus on what I want to be focusing on. Also I went through a brief stint of buying some really awesome New Balance sneakers and i’ve got a few pairs now and i’m just really loving my collection of sneakers.

Natasha: Oh man. I think one of the biggests misconceptions about our type of internet fame or how we got “famous” is our followers equal dollar signs

*laughter*

Dana: We know that Natasha.

Natasha: Well I was going to say, im in so much student debt because I put myself through 3 years of school that I still live paycheck to paycheck. That I would say that my ability to pay my rent every month and not worry about paying rent anymore is a really wonderful accomplishment and I also recently closed off one of my student lines of credit sooo...

Elise: Nice!

Dana: Congratulations!

Natasha: Simple, I’m like oh my credit score has gone up and improved greatly and I was able to buy myself eye glasses so that I could see again, and I might go to the dentist this week.

Dana: It’s the little things!

Natasha: Yes! So I think it’s humble adulting. And being able to adopt my doggie and take care of him responsibly. I think that's like the best thing.

Elise: Yea they can be expensive.

Natasha: Yea, they can. I mean he’s not so fancy but he’s better dressed than I am.

Dana: Mine’s costing me a fortune!

Dana: Ok so final question before I get to always final question. Where is your happy place?

Natasha: One of my happy places, because I really can’t choose just one, it depends on where i’m at in my life and what I need in that moment, you know, my happy place is most of the time on set, when i’m doing my job and doing a job that I love and i’m on set, thats like the best feeling in the world. But outside of work, I’d say, I still work at a farmers market for no real reason and I do that every 2 weeks or so or once a month with one of my best friends that I used to work in his restaurant when I was a starving artist and yea. I think just seeing the same faces i've been seeing for the last 5 years getting my hands dirty, and selling like wholesome and organic food, it's just really nice. It really is one of my happy places and I call it my therapy because for a moment I can go and like just be girl selling pie and eating delicious food and catching up on life with my friends and it’s so nice to have something that forces me to wake up in the morning and be accountable and show up. I don’t know. It really is just one of my happiest places. There's always street performers and musicians that play every week and there's always that great music like someone playing accordion and it such a Toronto thing too but it’s just so cute. There’s all these families around that are all mixed race and speaking different languages and there’s just a really nice peaceful vibe to that particular market that i enjoy. So yea, that's one of them.

Elise: I’m just a girl, standing in front of a pie, asking it to lover her.

*laughter*

Natasha: I do that every time I’m there

Elise: Ah man thats too funny. Where is my happy place? Um I went to Joshua Tree this Christmas and fell in love with it there, its so beautiful. I went rock climbing with my brother. Like any time im outdoors in nature that's when I really feel like most connected to my higher self and the planet and the universe and all that good stuff. So yea but I mean, I generally live in giant garbage ridden disgusting cities, like NY and Toronto and LA. I don’t really get that alot. So those moments when I am outdoors, like I went snowshoeing up on these mountains with my friends in BC over Christmas and yea those are def my happy places.

Dana: You guys are such beautiful souls.

Elise: Someone just recently, not told me, because I knew they existed but baths man! Baths are so underrated. I haven't had a bath since I was kid probably….Natasha’s face right now is like ugh ugh. But baths are just so relaxing! I had one the other night and I was like this is really great. You guys are so not on board, just trust me! Put some epsom salt, light a couple of candles, you might surprise yourself.

Natasha: No. I’ve tried to take baths all the time and i've just accepted that i don't enjoy them. Everytime i do it im like why am I forcing myself to do this? Because i'm going to be like 30 in a few years and society tells us that women loves baths. Like, no.

Dana: Not only do we love baths, we love eating yogurt in baths.

Natasha: Yea

Dana: All I can think about is getting epsom salts up my who-ha, that’s not relaxing to me.

Natasha: No, sitting in my own filth and having to stare at my naked body and like accept my body issues is absolutely not! And also being confined to a small space and being wet, im not about like water, im like no, no.

*laughter*

Dana: So to hell with your bath Elise, your happy place.

Elise: Well thanks for ruining my happy place.

Dana: We just made it a sad place.

Natasha: Hey to each their own, no judgment. I get the concept of the bath

Dana: You guys are heading to Vegas, soon, as am I. As are the many people who are listening to this. Was last year your first time in Vegas?

Natasha: It was.

Elise: It was indeed.

Dana: So I always ask everyone at the end of the podcast, what their favorite things about Vegas are and what would they recommend? I know your guys were really busy and you didn’t have a lot of downtime, but did you get to do anything where you were like, this is kind of crazy fun!?

Natasha: We had a really nice time in the artist alley. We went to some cool vintage shops and went to a really nice cafe, that I think was really more our speed. Elise and I are really similar in that we take our jobs pretty seriously and want to be in high spirits, so I feel like all the bartenders and like restaurant folks hated us because we were like “We’ll just have water and a salad.”

*laughter*

Natasha: And went in at like 10 every night but I did see a Cirque du Soleil show that was incredible! I saw “Love” and i’m so glad that i did it. I was like when in rome, im going to go see a show even though it was past my bedtime and...

Elise: I was so mad I didn’t go to that.

Natasha: Yea, like the word spectacle, that's what it was, it was spectacular. Cirque du Soleil is always amazing but the fact that it’s in a theater that's built specifically for the show, everything was seamless and flawless, from the lighting design to like even the technical cues, like someone in a booth cue-ing them up and they’re seamless. The dancing was amazing. I saw “Love” so it’s all Beatles music, which I love so much, so yea it was really fantastic. I hope I get to see another show this year.

Elise: I’ll be down, lets go, lets do it.

Natasha: The performances were just like really really amazing. I also just love the desert. I love dry climate and I love desert life but I’m not as into debauchery as my. I don't know what it is man, I don't know what people think im like.

Dana: I’ve spent numerous evening and experiences with you and I would never describe you as debaucherous.

*laugher*

Natasha: No, i know i know! I think I had a brief moment in time like 7-6 years ago and then I was like cool, im good

*laughter*

Dana: So what about you Elise, besides the slot machines?

Elise: Artist alley was pretty rad, there's all these crazy old vintage stores just chalk full of weird Vegas antiques.

Natasha: Yeah.

Elise: So that was pretty cool. The strip itself is not really my jam, but I don’t know, I mean I’m not really there to see, im more there to meet people and hang out and yea. Im really looking forward to it, Vegas was such a good time last year.

Natasha: Yea, I mean I enjoyed the convention itself so much, I think its my most favorite one I’ve done so.

Dana: Oh yay!

Natasha: I’m really looking forward to it again this year, more than the city. It could be anywhere and I would enjoy it.

Dana: Do you hear that ClexaCon? Next year we could be in Iowa!

Elise: Let’s not push things Dana

*laughter*

Dana: No offense Iowa! I’ve been to you, you’re lovely. Well thank you to the two of you, you are always so thoughtful and interesting and funny and i’ve probably interviewed you guys a gazillion times but it's always a new and interesting experience!

Elise: Thank you for having us, this was fun!

Natasha: Yeah you always have the best questions!

Elise: You really do, we sometimes have the same questions all the time.

Dana: I know you do so you going to see the 3 of us, well the 2 of them and i'll be there too at the Hollstein panel at ClexaCon. Not sure what day it is yet but they're going to be there. And where can our listeners find you on social media if they aren't already following you, which im sure they are

Elise: @baumanelise and that is now both the same on Instagram and Twitter because I was a baby when I made my twitter and it involved numbers and it really didn't need too so it's all matching now.

Natasha: You can find me on Instagram and Twitter @natvanlis, my first name and then my last name mushed together! That’s it!

*laughter*

Dana: Oh well, you guys have a wonderful next couple of what... we have less than 60 days until ClexaCon?

Natasha: Really? Time flies.

Elise: I gotta start packing.

Dana: It does. I know right? I have all my outfits planned out. I have a spreadsheet with my outfits on it.

Natasha: That’s impressive! Can you come over and do that for me please?

Elise: Organizational queen-ness right there! That is awesome.

Natasha: That's amazing. Elise and I usually have a crisis the night before amd

call each other or meet up in our hotel rooms and up wearing like running shoes and a t-shirt

Dana: Please! You guys looked amazing last year.

Elise: Looking back on what I've worn, it really does look like there's not been a lot of planning in there.

Dana: You goobers. Every time I've seen you you look amazing.

I’m going pink, so the next time you see me i'll have dark pink, ombre hair so crossing my finger that that works out

Natasha: oooohhh! I hope it works out better than my bangs.

*laughter*

That is going to do it for this episode of “unCONventional”. Thank you so much for listening!

Are really liking “unCONventional”? Then do a us favor and leave a review, tell some friends, tweet about it, we’d really really appreciate it. You can find ClexaCon on Twitter, Facebook and tumblr @clexacon. You can find me, Dana Piccoli on Twitter @dandpiccoli. And our theme music, our wonderful theme music is by Stephanie Berlanga and you can find her at stephanieberlangamusic.com. We are so close you guys, we are so so close, we are going to have one more episode before the show and planning to do a live taping like I mentioned last week so looking forward very much to that. Until the next time we meet, here's Dana Piccoli swearing fealty to you.

#clexacon #clexacon2018 #clexacon 2018 #unCONventional pocast #clexacon podcast #Natasha Negovanlis #elise bauman #carmilla movie #carmilla series #creampuffs #lgbt #lgbtq #lgbtq+#clexacon guests

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ill-be-istj-if-no-one-else-is · 6 years

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1.Hi! I have trouble seeing if im an istj or not. I relate to the anxiety at trying new things where i dont know what to expect (unless i know theyre safe) but i also cant relate to the attention to details, or remembering facts accurately, or repeating enjoyable experiences. When i eat something i like, and return again after some time, i feel my enjoyment of it decrease w each repetition.

2. Sometimes i relate to building the big picture from the ground up, like i know how the facts led me to a conclusion. But sometimes not, like i just feel that the answer is right, or the conclusion hits me while im on the bus even though i havent been thinking about the query for a while. I also relate to the idea of wanting to do my duty and i relate to some aspects of inferior ne, like the feeling of dread at something, without a clear image of wat would happen

3. But on the other hand i also suck at managing practical things like administrative tasks, banking. Everything always goes wrong and i omit so many details, things to do that ppl would find self-evident. I also have endless troubles by putting things and forgetting where they are, taking keys with me and forgetting phone, or vice versa, forgetting if i locked the door even though while locking i focus to tell myself to remember. Is si-dom likely?

----

Hi anon,

I want to answer this carefully but my short answer is probably no.

While I believe any glowing description of a type that only focuses on the positives and neglects the negatives is to be looked at with considerable skepticism, I do believe that all types have strengths and weaknesses and if you only relate to the most negative aspects of a type then you need to continue looking.

Going into the specifics/debunking the many Si stereotypes here:

Anxiety with the unfamiliar is to some extent normal. Si users want familiarity as a default and what they consider safe and what they consider predictable overlap. That’s really the key. All people feel fear or trepidation sometimes and it’s usually not for things they’re already comfortable doing (kind of tautological here but hopefully you get what I mean).

Si is not perfect recall; I misremember facts sometimes because I’m a human being with a fallible memory. However, if you’re not fairly detail-oriented and you never try to repeat enjoyable experiences, that does indicate you’re not relating to the positive aspects of Si at all, just anxiety, which can come (typology-wise) from low Si or from high Ni feeling as though they can’t prepare or enneagram 6, or outside of typology for the reasons I’ve mentioned or from actual medical anxiety, depending on the severity.

The thing about food enjoyment decreasing seems like it’s just you. I remember back a while ago someone was like “all the SJs I know are like ‘every blueberry tastes different’ and I’m like “uh...probably? Fruit is very variable? I don’t know, I’m not super taste-sensitive.”

Having an epiphany while daydreaming is just kind of how intuition in any position may work, so it’s more a case of how often. Most people who are vaguely capable of being an adult similarly do want to fulfill their obligations on some level, and we already discussed anxiety; all the second ask indicates is that you have both sensing and intuition and are a person who is not totally flaky. Which is all good, but again, there’s a lack of any strong indicators of high Si. This continues into the third paragraph which in fact contradicts common indicators of high Si - everyone forgets stuff sometimes, but if it’s a very common occurance and you lack attention to detail, you are not fulfilling any of the positive (by which I mean both ‘typically seen as good’ and ‘things you have rather than things you don’t have’) traits of Si.

Typing yourself is hard and complicated and I find it difficult to state the exact specifics of what you need to look at because it really needs to be very big picture yet with many detailed examples all at once. However, for a very bare-bones approach, it is useful to understand what you do that is different and better/more than average, and what you seem to struggle with more than most people. This helps eliminate a lot of the ‘that’s just being a person’ data.

I also want to finish up with the fact that a lot of descriptions describe inferior Ne as this existential specific if unnamed dread which is a very Ni-Se way of thinking about it. It’s a lot less detatched and philosophical than described and much more viscerally ‘everything is out of control’ and at least in my experience it often comes with a more John Mulaney ‘this may as well happen’ feeling. It’s also not usually an extreme fear/anxiety but more of a ‘I don’t want to do this’ feeling.

#mbti #introverted sensing #Anon ask #answered asks

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ekel-a · 3 years

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Heartbreaks Aren't Easy

You ever seen a movie where the girls falls in love in one month and she’s already picking baby names and planning her wedding coz she found ‘the one’That girl is me! All the time! I love to love! First time I was inlove….I picked flowers, dresses, honeymoon destinations, baby names I even went to one of those baby face apps and matched me and my ex’s faces together to check if we would have an ugly baby..( I do that in month 2 of dating you Im sorry, I cant take any chances) The apps are sickening accurate, I tried it on my sister and her hubby (I’m sorry Lydia and Rahim, I was just checking) and my niece was so close to the apps prediction image!Yes I love to love and I go overboard sometimes its my bad habit because when you put in such high expectation its so easy to be broken and Oh Lawd was I broken in tiny little pieces when our 2 yr on and off charades ended…I drank a bottle of wine every single night! Every single night! Because I couldn’t sleep! Yes, I was slowly becoming a tinsy bitsy alcoholic….and I would hide when I drink because I didn’t want anyone to know how bad I was doing, I was angry. Very angry. The anger was extreme! I would treat people terribly I was rude and mean gosh I was toxic! It took me a while to get rid of it, a nun walked up to me at a certain office, I had rudely cut off a line and answered the man infront of me in the worst possible way and left the whole crowd in amazement.. she walked up to me and asked ' Why are you so angry? Forgive them, whoever it is, its not worth it' It was like an epiphany..I moved to another region..traveled all across the region to see what I can do to help the community, involved myself with all sorts of projects to keep myself busy. And Gosh I was busy. But I was still broken angry. And you know the saying ;hurt people , hurt…people' Its damn right accurate. The first guy I dated after that merry go round I messed him up like no ones business. I treated him so bad I cant even bring myself to forgive me for how I treated him till date. Then I noticed, I was doing to him the same things that had been done to me. Pain is a chain. It is. I was hurt and I was vulnerable and much worse, I was scared, I was scared of every single man I met, I was scared of men in the street I was scared of men at church I was scared of all men, at one point I cancelled out the forever after happy neutral family thoughts that I used to look upto, I didn’t even want to hear it, I told my very born again mother that I don’t think I like men anymore ..long story short …I was in a church having the devil cursed out of me ..Oh mom hahaha… . I didn’t trust anyone and in my little mind I was protecting myself. I build a wall so high even the wind couldn’t come above it.Heartbreaks are hard, they can ruin you….people will think you’re crazy you’re insane. I had a cousin who thought she was helping me by telling me what he was doing, letting me know he was moving on she didn’t even know how hurtful she was being, I learned, when people are hurt, don’t try help, don’t try give them advice, let them hurt, let them heal and most all. Listen to them..dont give advice don’t tell them what to do. Just listen….I had a friend I used to complain to…every single damn week I call him complaining about how angry I was….He has no idea but his no judgement listening kept me sane hahaahaLong story short It took me a year to get it together…then the most terrible thing happened. Dating got difficult for me, Its like I went back to the girl who was straight from high school who was nervous when she saw a boy…I had a lot of guy friends mind you, its just ..the dating part. Oh Lawd… I would fidget and stutter and talk without making sense, I was always very nervous…Once I was on a dinner date I dropped the whole plate of food on my dress with my butter fingers and as I stood up to go get cleaned up I slipped and landed on a piano in the restaurant, I'm just lucky Mbeya restaurants never have big crowds..there were only 2 other people in the restaurant. It was bad, I was grown woman and I was acting like a teenager..all nervous and fidgety, I wrote him a long message excusing myself and embarrassingly tried to slip out the kitchen door (damn waiter told on me)… he caught me at the parking lot trying to escape I was an inch close to running, luckily the man accepted my weirdness wholeheartedly and we went back inside to finish dinner ...hahaHeartbreak can totally change you..its tough out there when you wear your heart on a sleeve. So be careful with people’s hearts…But the let me lighten up your heart by telling you a little story about the one man I love unconditionally ….When I was young, my father used to give me these tiny little pills whenever I was sick, he used to say they would make me feel better. So whenever I was sick and from the hospital I would eat my meals take my meds and finish up with the magic pills he specifically got for me whenever I was sick, he used to say they treated everything and anything, this went on till I was 5 years old…until about when I was 8, I hadn’t been sick for a while and those pills used to taste so good. So I stayed home that day and played sick, I pulled his leg so he wont go to work I rolled on the floor and cried so hard the neighbors heard, trying to convince him I was sick and I needed those magic pills, my mother saw right through me she didn’t even give me the time. But my father oh my, he carried me rubbed my tears and demanded they make me soup… felt my forehead and demanded my mother take me to the hospital ..’Oh no Dad I need the pills they will make me better again’ When he declined I started crying and complaining again..’my tummy, my head they hurt so bad, please give me the magic pills’ Gosh I cried so hard, and so he did, he went out to the nearest pharmacy (as he told me) and got the pills. When he got back he gave me one pill. I took it in and sprung up saying I felt better already. I drank my soup and he asked me if I would be able to go to school tomorrow…I said yes. Whenever I played sick he without argument gave me 1 magic pill. Until I was old enough to forget about them. 10 years later, I was abroad for college, my first year, I was walking around in a supermarket and saw something Odd…It’s the pills! I screamed! The pills! I went to the counter paid for them and immediately started to chew em on them..bringing back memories of when I was young...but I was just so curious! What were the pills doing at a super market?? So I asked the lady at the counter..'what are these?'‘They’re called Tic Tacs!’ She said I took a picture and sent him an email ‘You knew?’ he called and laughed for 10 minutes straight!Is it too late for fathers day story?...

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cooljazsheepie · 7 years

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Webcomic Creator Interview with Kosmic of Feast for a King

Hi, all! I usually don’t post my webcomic creator interviews on this account, but this one is special since the comic is explicitly NSFW. The creator, Kosmic, is super awesome though and deserved an interview anyway. Check it after the cut.

Me: Please introduce yourself.

Kosmic: My name is Kosmic and I make two comics currently, Feast for a King and Eggshells. Although I mostly focus on Feast for a King! Which is a really graphically violent/sexual story about man eating worms in a sci-fi setting. I started it in September 2014 and I’ve basically been working every day on it since then.

Me: What made you pick sci-fi?

Kosmic: I’ve always really loved sci-fi stuff!! Many of my favorite stories/movies are sci-fi or have some robot/alien elements to them. I think it’d be more accurate to say that sci-fi picked me because FFAK was inspired by a dream I had which had some very strong sci-fi elements and visuals. I think at the time when I started FFAK, I was also feeling really inspired by the first two Terminator movies and wanted to like, take the elements about that i found successful in those movies and include them in my own story! I liked how much the characters struggled and how hopeless it felt to face their enemies, but they kept going anyway despite being so afraid. I also had a bunch of stories/characters I worked on sometimes that was really just my own version of Trigun that I didn’t know what to do with and just...felt like building on more of that type of world. I think I first started those characters in like 2009 but they were basically just back-burner ideas for something eventually. I got a lot of story material like that!!

Me: Do you have a favorite part of the creative process when you're working on your comic?

Kosmic: Favorite part of he process...That is kinda difficult. There are so many parts that I enjoy that blend in with each other, it’s hard to determine when one step begins and the other ends. Brainstorming with music is always really nice, especially if it’s in the afternoon and I don’t have any responsibilities to worry about. I do a lot of self RP too. I can go anywhere in the story I feel like and just let my mind explore freely!! Its always very fun/exciting to discover things I didn’t expect or when some connection suddenly clicks that opens up new doors of ideas! SO.. daydreaming is my favorite part, I suppose. That feels kinda basic to say, but I can’t think of anything that tops it!

Me: Nooo. I totally get what you mean. Just letting ideas come to you is the best! You do color and black&white comics. Do you prefer one over the other?

Kosmic: I don’t really like the look of colored comics for the most part, honestly. I find it way too mentally distracting and I find it often takes me out of the story by making me too aware I’m reading something. So, I generally prefer the look of B&W comics when I’m the one reading. However! I personally find it boring to do for too long if I’m the one working!! I hate doing the same stuff for too long and black/white communicates a certain type of atmosphere to me, so after a while it can feel kinda stiff or limited when I don’t...really need to be?? I used to be determined to only use B/W ONLY EVER!!! and now I am allowing myself the freedom to experiment using some aspects of color to communicate my ideas and not worry about a consistent look too much lol. I sort of feel like my comics fall somewhere in the middle because they obviously DO use color but aren’t like the ‘typical’ full color comic, I guess? I dunno. That’s how i interpret it anyway. I am breaking my own rules of what looks good!!! If I had to make a decision, it would still B&W over color. :3

Me: Do the colors you pick have a certain significance for the characters? Like I know you have several named after them and the worms are colored by status.

Kosmic: Yes! Totally. They are super important! I have a whole color lore or color language I have built in the story. I dont really focus on like...every color in the rainbow though. Its mostly with basic default-y colors of Red/Yellow/Blue + Green. Red and Green being the most important ones I use in FFAK. I reflect a lot on their dynamic and parallel in several different ways with various designs and narratives, Crimson and Celadon’s relationship is also meant to be a direct translation of that conflict and bond I see with those two colors in the context of the story as well. Red and Green is like the ...PURE EXPRESSION OF LIFE AND DEATH!!! or something.

Me: For your worms, do you choose certain animals for them or you just go by whatever? Like how Paper is a bunny.

Kosmic: Nah, I mostly go by whatever and many worm designs are just improvised on the spot as these weird...animal chimera things. Paper is sort of an odd one out because she’s specifically very bunny-themed.

Me: Do you have a favorite character?

Kosmic: Crimson’s my absolute favorite character!! However... Knife is also very important. I guess he’s a close 2nd. I just have put a staggering amount of work/history into both characters they both kinda stand out a little bit from the rest lol.

Me: I know you said to just read whatever, but how does the use of gender shape your comic? As a creator.

Kosmic: I suppose it shapes a lot and yet it...doesn’t? IDK, it’s difficult to explain cause I think gender is a broad topic and I’m not sure what parts to focus on with it shaping? Haha. Most of my characters are just self-inserts really. It’s not really a conscious thing that I feel like I need to fit a quota of or something. I just sort of naturally feel the need to articulate feelings about my experiences using the characters sometimes. I also generally use my comic as a safe place to explore my thoughts about identity and sexuality. It makes the comic really personal/vulnerable/stressful sometimes, but I also feel like I understand myself a little easier. As much as I reflect on it I don't really have a concise answer or reason.. it’s just part of life! So there it is!

Me: Do you find that you attract or put off readers with the sex? Like do people expect a hentai situation? Or ignore the warning and get mad about it?

Kosmic: Yeah, it definitely rocks the boat a bit. I get a lot of polarized reactions from my sexual content. Mostly it’s supported and people understand and respect what I do with it, but I have definitely received negative comments or like, people feeling betrayed it was included at all. (Nothing upset people more than that period sex scene in chapter 11 for example .) It’s also often described as a vore fetish comic which I also...have mixed feelings with LMFAO. It just feels really misleading and simplifying the narrative. I think the fact that I include genitals in my drawings [means] people get the impression it’s supposed to be a smutty hentai comic, but then when they read it isn’t that either. So it’s hard for people to determine what it is. It pushes buttons, I guess. good and bad.

Me: Who is your intended audience or do you not have one?

Kosmic: I don’t really have an intended audience!!! I just draw it as much for me as possible. :D

Me: What made you decide on making a webcomic?

Kosmic: I’ve been determined to make comics since i was like...13 or 14? And webcomics are very freeing!! You just post it and go!! Nothing can stop you from making your story how you want and I love that.

Me: Do you have any advice for other creators?

Kosmic: Advice is tough... But I suppose it is important to establish your boundaries between yourself and the audience. Your enjoyment and relationship you have with yourself and your art is what is most important. So be careful not to burn yourself out on what people will think/say/ask and it’s OK to feel overwhelmed and over-stimulated sometimes. Even when it’s positive attention, it can still be just as stressful and draining. I find that’s the hardest part about making a comic is learning how to deal with the reception rather than making the comic itself lmao. So yeah! Draw and write what you want! Always. But also give yourself a private place only for you, so you can reflect on your journey. :3

Me: That's great advice. Do you plan on making a print version?

Kosmic: My friend Cameron made Chapter 1 into a book and mailed it to me as a surprise. But besides that, I have no actual plans or real desire to make a printed version.It seems like it would take a lot of work to do and I’m very lazy. Maybe some sort of art book would be more ideal, but who knows!

Me: Will you be attending any cons or making any merch?

Kosmic: I went to one con in 2015! I sold like...a single poster I think. It was fun (especially because a friend from Canada was staying and helped tremendously with it,I also got interviewed the first time there!) but not exactly the ideal experience. Another friend also made keychains for me of the characters that we sold online. But, besides that, I don’t have any cons planned. I want to make t-shirts in the future, but I’m so slow to do these things. I just really need to take the plunge, but I generally get intimidated by money making stuff!!

Me: Do you do art full time?

Kosmic: Yes LOL. FFAK is basically my life. I do educational/instructional flash animations as well for the monies, but I am pretty broke most of the time. If it weren't for Patreon, IDK what I’d do!! I am so thankful for it.

And that’s it. I already linked Kosmic’s Tumblr profile, but you can also follow them on Twitter for personal or comic updates! If you have any comments or questions, feel free to post here or submit an ask. If you would like to be interviewed for your own comic, contact me here for explicitly NSFW content or over on my literacy blog if your work doesn’t have content restrictions that make it NSFW. Please also feel free to suggest artists for me to interview.

#kosmicdream #kosmic #feast for a king #webcomic interview

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theganjadigest · 7 years

Text

/r/trees FAQ!

Hello fellow ents, I've been on this sub for quite a while now and it's about time we have a solid FAQ addressing questions I see asked just about every day, sometimes more than once. My goal is to give in-depth, researched answers to many of these.

Of course, I am but human, so if you think Im wrong or have made a mistake, send me a pm and lets hash it out. If you all like it and it sticks around I want to continue updating it!

HOW TO CLEAN A GLASS PIECE

Cleaning a glass piece is way easier than you might think. Unless you have a very complicated piece, this method will work every time.

Soak your piece in 91% isopropyl alcohol for 10-15 minutes, up to 30 if it's really gunked up.

-For pipes the easiest way is to put it in a baggie -For bongs, rigs, large pipes, etc, find a way to either submerse the piece or fill it up all way in every spot you can.

Put some water through a coffee pot or boil it in a pan. You want it as hot as possible.

Pour the hot water through the piece and you'll see the dissolving resin melt right off the glass and get whisked away. Pour all of the water through to ensure the iso smell/taste doesnt longer, and tada.

This method also works for pieces made of most other materials.

For dab rigs that want to harvest reclaim:

Soak your piece in isopropyl alcohol for up to 2 hours, occasionally stirring it or giving it a gentle shake.

Empty the reclaim-laden iso onto a large plate and set it in a breezy area (or use a small fan) for 24 hours or until all of the alcohol has evaporated. Scrape and enjoy.

Run boiling water through the piece to finish cleaning it and remove any remaining alcohol.

An alternative method is heating up the piece just enough to turn the reclaim into liquid and let it collect in a harvestable location.

WHAT ABOUT SMOKING RESIN?

Age old question with a million different answers. After thorough research, here is what I have come up with:

Can you get high off resin? Yes, but it turns out the potency depends on many factors. Strains naturally vary in THC content for one, and not every toker tokes the same way; lighting habits, how often the bowl is cleaned, and how old the resin is has a lot to do with the potency.

On average resin has roughly half of the THC content your average bud. However, if the resin has been overheated or is old and subsequently been exposed to more bowls, it is likely to have a much lower THC content.

Why does it give me such a headrush if there is less THC?

This is likely due to asphyxiation. All that tar prevents your lungs from absorbing the oxygen they need, leading to a lightheaded feeling similar to holding your breath for a long time or standing up too quick. Smoking resin also often leads to headaches, likely for this same reason.

When you smoke resin you're literally smoking the byproducts of combustion. It is way more carcinogenic, it gunks up your lungs, and it tastes like garbage. I dont advise it.

WILL I PASS THIS DRUG TEST?

Since there is no blanket response to this question, I'll instead cover the general information. If your question is too specific for this guide, ask away ent!

To begin, lets make some labels.

• Rarely: Once a month or less • Occasionally: Once every other week or so, about a few times a month. • Often: At least once a week • Regularly: At least once a day • Heavy: Multiple times throughout the day

How long does THC stay in the system?

In the average clean person, THC is metabolized and expelled completely within about 3 days. If you smoke occasionally, it could take up to a week, but likely not any more. Smoking often it could take 2-3 weeks and regularly up to a month. Heavy users can expect to remain dirty for up to 2 months. These are generalizations of course, but it's an accurate baseline to figure out about how long until you're clean again. Remember to expect slight variations depending on your weight, level of activity, and diet.

How to get clean faster?

There is no sure-fire way to piss clean if you have smoked within the last couple days.

But what about those detox drinks? Well, they have extremely mixed results and often end up showing an unreadable test. This is because they basically just want to flush your system, and since they're technically dietary suppliments, they aren't regulated by the FDA and can literally be bullshit in a bottle.

The only proven way to speed up the process is to accelerate your endocrine system (you need to pee it all out). This can be done by exercising to burn fat that has the metabolites stored in it, sweating copiously (saunas work well), and drinking a lot of water. Cranberry or pickle juice is also common because they make you pee more.

What about saliva tests?

Dont smoke the day of the test and use Listerine before the test and you'll pass. If you have smoked the day of the test there is no guarantee that you'll pass. There are kits on the market made to clean your mouth so that you can pass, but I have no experience with them personally.

What about hair tests?

Hair stores THC metabolites in it indefinitely, as far as I know. Because hair takes so long to grow, most testing is done on the area closer to your scalp, with the size of the testing area depending on the timeframe they want you to have been clean for. There are shampoos but they seem to have mixed results at best. If you have smoked within the last week it likely wont show up yet, though.

TOLERANCE BREAKS?

What is a T-Break?

A tolerance break is when a regular smoker stops smoking for a while to allow their accumulated tolerance to drop.

Should I take a T-Break?

If you're starting to feel like you're getting less of a high or if it is taking more and more to get you to the level you want to be, a tolerance break may be in order.

Your body's immune system reacts when you smoke weed. It releases special cells to attack the intruding molecules and metabolize them, and just like when exposed to other foreign bodies, it learns how to fight it. The result is a shorter, less intense high. When you take a tolerance break you're letting your immune system "forget" about it for a little while so when you come back it cant respond as efficiently as it used to.

How long should a tolerance break last?

Well, that's up to you. If you take a break for a week, you'll get higher again for a little while, but it's pretty temporary. 2-3 weeks is generally considered a good amount of time away for the average smoker. The longer you wait, the more of a resistance your immune system will have to rebuild, and the longer your t-break will be effective.

I SMOKED FOR THE FIRST TIME AND DIDNT GET HIGH, WHAT GIVES?

Dont worry, this is super common! And most of the time it's just because you're a newbie at smoking.

Many first timers dont know how to properly hit a bowl, or they dont hit it hard enough so they dont ingest enough to actually get high. The second time is almost always successful.

Another possibility is that since the cannabinoid receptors in your brain have never experienced a cannabinoid other than the ones they create, they may simply block them. I find this unlikely though because I have personally experienced many people getting too stoned their first time.

I HAD MY WISDOM TEETH REMOVED, CAN I SMOKE?

NOOOO. Trust me, it isnt worth it. Smoking (and using straws) creates a suction that can, and will, rip your bloodclots out. This means that the hole where your tooth was is just that: a hole with a bunch of exposed bone. And it is painful.

I suggest using it as an opportunity to take a tolerance break, but if you insist on getting high while recovering, edibles are your only safe option. You see around about how you can bite on gauze, or use a gravity bong, etc., but none of those methods are foolproof. If you arent careful or if you even cough too hard, you can very easily ruin your next 3 weeks.

I've been through a double dry socket because I smoked when I shouldnt have, and it was one of the most painful experiences of my life. You have been warned.

Submitted August 02, 2017 at 01:59PM by BeautifulChickens via reddit http://ift.tt/2uWXCAK

#ganja #pot #marijuana #420 #blaze it #legalize it

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bronzeflower · 7 years

Text

Who The Fuck Writes A Ten-Page Rant?????

Also on ao3

-----

Chapter 7: Literary Device Kingdoms

-- turntechGodhead [TG] began pestering tentacleTherapist [TT] --

TG: roooooooose TG: rose TG: rose TG: are you there

TT: Yes, Dave, I am here. TT: And it seems like you have adapted John’s penchant for using eight letters at a time for emphasis on various words.

TG: what really TG: goddamn it

TT: Yes, this appears to be a despicable habit that we must rid you of.

TG: please do TG: i dont want a total of eight letters exactly all the time to haunt me for the rest of my life TG: but that isnt what i came here to talk about

TT: Did you perhaps pester me to inform me of your previous conversation with Karkat?

TG: hell yeah i did

TT: I only assumed because that is what you were bugging me about previously.

TG: that is a pretty good assumption to make TG: anyway the conversation i had with karkat was really nice TG: hes a lot shoutier over text than voice TG: he types in all caps like holy shit TG: so angry TG: does some long ass metaphors TG: im still the best at them but karkat may be shooting for my place on the throne TG: make a note to watch out for that

TT: It has been noted.

TG: thank you for that rose TG: best goddamned advisor i ever had TG: i trust you completely TG: wow i sound like one of those kings that trust their shitty and evil advisor without a single thought that their advisor could potentially want to overthrow them TG: are you going to take over my kingdom rose

TT: I have no interest in ruling the Kingdom of Metaphors. TT: I am perfectly happy here in my “Palace of Prose.”

TG: thank fucking god TG: i dont think i could handle a rebellion TG: shits dangerous you know TG: do each of us get a literary device kingdom TG: if i have the kingdom of metaphors and you get the palace of prose TG: which is an awesome name btw TG: like is john the king of hyperbole TG: or jade the queen of personification TG: do they get kingdoms TG: are they opposing kingdoms TG: or are they all good friends and shit TG: does every single literary device get a kingdom or is only major ones TG: these are important questions here rose

TT: I’m not sure if John would be suited to the role of ruling over the hyperbole commonwealth. TT: I’m certain he would need to have some sort of training first. TT: He would need to become the heir to the kingdom. TT: Or he should rule over some other literary device.

TG: that makes me wonder what literary device he would rule over TG: hold up let me pull up a list TG: holy shit there are a lot of literary devices TG: i dont know what half this stuff is TG: shit ton of different types of irony TG: what the fuck is a zeugma

TT: A zeugma is a literary device that is both literal and metaphorical. TT: For example, “they covered themselves in dust and glory.”

TG: thats actually pretty cool

TT: Quite.

TG: what were we even talking about before all this literary device nonsense.

TT: I believe you were talking about the conversation you shared with Karkat.

TG: oh yeah TG: but yeah hes super long winded and his metaphors are actual works of art TG: he was actually the guy who wrote the top quality hate mail i received

TT: Really?

TG: yeah really isnt that fucking fantastic TG: you wouldnt have expected it if you were just talking to him in real life TG: but over messaging holy shit TG: absolutely glorious TG: he should really do something with that talent TG: write a fucking novel or some shit

TT: I would never have expected Karkat to be so…

TG: angry TG: long winded TG: creative with his words

TT: Yes. TT: He always seems so nice and professional. TT: Then again, I’ve only ever seen him at work, so I suppose I don’t exactly have the most accurate idea of what his personality is actually like.

TG: you also just spend your time flirting with kanaya

TT: The flirting is consensual.

TG: what are you two dating now

TT: Yes, actually.

TG: holy shit TG: did you go on a date TG: is that why you couldnt respond to my message TG: i need a brief overview of what happened stat

TT: Nothing much, really. TT: All we did was go out to lunch and walk around the park for a little while. TT: It was nice.

TG: that sounds like a fantastic date TG: very casual like a first date should be

TT: Agreed.

TG: anyway how are you doing TG: done anything interesting lately TG: something other than writing your book TG: which one are you on anyway TG: like the fifth or something or other TG: you just have a large fucking amount of books that you have written TG: and you go into these modes where you dont talk to anyone unless its the cashier at the grocery store

TT: I require food to survive, Dave. TT: But, yes, I have done something interesting lately. TT: Instead of writing a book, I opted for reading something.

TG: what really TG: what are you reading TG: actually i dont think i want to know TG: knowing you its probably something weird with a shit ton of monsters and stuff TG: not really something im interested in

TT: It's actually a novel that Kanaya recommended to me. TT: It's very interesting.

TG: well i guess if its not about monsters eating each other or a huge ass monster talking above a whisper that murders everyone its fine TG: lay it on me

TT: It's actually a series of books. TT: I'm only on the first one so far, but it holds a certain amount of charm to it.

TG: well youre going to have to do more than just tell me that the book has a certain kind of charm TG: you might want to actually tell me about the book

TT: Well, it's about a young girl who is being sent to finishing school by her family in order to become a lady. TT: However, the finishing school she is being sent to is not a normal finishing school. TT: It teaches a finishing of a different kind. TT: That is to say, it teaches young ladies to assassinate people as well as gather information.

TG: holy shit TG: that was not the direction i was expecting that to go

TT: I would recommend the book series to you. TT: You often like stories with a steampunk theme to them, and Kanaya stated that Etiquette and Espionage is a must read book for all those who love the steampunk genre.

TG: i do have to say TG: i am a little bit interested in reading the book TG: i might just go to the bookstore and buy it

TT: I knew you would be curious about it.

TG: yeah well im interested because you said there was a steampunk theme to it TG: but why were you interested in it TG: you typically go for the lovecraftian horror stories TG: god those are so fucking creepy TG: i have no earthly clue why you enjoy reading them so much TG: i personally cant stand reading those TG: ignore my tangent and answer my question instead

TT: I don't know, Dave. TT: Your tangents are awfully fun to analyze.

TG: goddamn it rose TG: youre an author not a fucking therapist TG: regardless of what your chumhandle says TG: anyway i know kanaya recommended it to you but what actually made you interested in the book

TT: I have always had a certain interest in fashion and such, particularly Victorian fashion. TT: I also enjoy the humor in the novel. TT: It is very deadpan, and it is enjoyable to read that someone wants to murder their first husband in a casual tone. TT: Don't worry though, Dave. TT: The only murder that occurs is in the last book, and the deaths are of minor characters. TT: Kanaya assured me this was such. TT: However, she did mention that there were some graphic descriptions of violence, particularly in the ending part of the last book. TT: If you don't feel comfortable with that, you don't have to read the novels.

TG: nah TG: i think i should be more or less ok TG: if i feel like i cant handle reading some part of it i can always go to you or kanaya to find out what actually happened in that part TG: but of course you read it because of people possibly murdering their future husbands TG: do you know why kanaya really liked the series

TT: Apparently, she has an interest in vampires and rainbow drinkers. TT: So there is a supernatural aspect to the book.

TG: so are there werewolves and shit as well

TT: Yes, there are.

TG: sweet TG: i probably need to get out of the house anyway TG: it will give me an excuse to stretch my legs and such

TT: Do you really require an excuse to do that?

TG: yes

TT: Well, don’t let me stop you.

TG: alright TG: ill be taking my leave

-- turntechGodhead [TG] ceased pestering tentacletherapist [TT] --

Now, before you leave to go to the bookstore, you needed to do one more thing.

-- turntechGodhead [TG] began pestering ectoBiologist [EB] --

TG: john TG: john TG: i have a very important question for you

EB: lay it on me.

TG: what literary device kingdom would you rule

EB: that’s a really weird question, dave. EB: i think you might have to elaborate a little.

TG: so rose and i were talking TG: and we decided that I was the king of metaphors TG: we later decided that she was the queen of prose TG: which of course begged the question TG: what the fuck would you be

EB: i don’t think i want to rule an imaginary literary device kingdom! EB: it seems like a lot of responsibility.

TG: of course its a lot of goddamned responsibility TG: youre ruling a kingdom here TG: a hypothetical kingdom sure TG: but a kingdom nonetheless TG: youve got to take care of all the little people residing in your kingdom TG: but youre basically supposed to chose the literary device that you utilize the most often

EB: i can’t recall using many literary devices! EB: i think i would probably end up being the subject of one of the kingdoms.

TG: thats fair

EB: what about jade? EB: have you asked her?

TG: no but she probably rules over personification or something like that TG: you were more of a mystery

EB: i guess i’m just going to have to think about it.

TG: ill just be waiting over here for you answer TG: because this lack of information is clearly what is keeping me up at night TG: well i wont be actually waiting TG: that would just be creepy as fuck TG: ill just occasionally check pesterchum to see if you have come up with an answer yet TG: be sure to pester me when you do alright

EB: i’ll be sure to do that, dave.

TG: thanks bro TG: anyway im going to the bookstore to get a book rose recommended TG: for once it was not about horrorterrers TG: see ya later john

-- turntechGodhead [TG] ceased pestering ectoBiologist [EB] --

Your curiosity had yet to be sated. You were still curious as to what literary device kingdom John would rule. This was of course purely hypothetical, but it was still something very important that you needed to know as soon as possible.

Anyway, you decided that now would be a good time as any to make your way to the bookstore. Since it was literally right down the street, you didn't actually bother going into your car and driving there. That would be pointless and stupid because then you would have to find a parking space and pay for parking and that was entirely too much work to go get a book from a bookstore that was so close to your house.

When you got to the bookstore, you started out be looking around to see if you could find the book anywhere. It occurs to you that Rose never actually told you who the author was. She only told you the name of the book, which was fine, but it would have been very helpful to actually obtain the name of the person who wrote it as well.

You also didn't know all that much about the book save for a few basic things.And like hell are you actually going to ask someone for assistance to find the book. However, Rose did give you the title of the book, which is occasionally good enough.

As you wandered through the store, you ended up being surprised at a familiar face.

Oh god. It was Karkat. And yeah, the two of you talked pretty casually over Pesterchum and Trollian respectively, but you don't really think you could handle an actual interaction with him in person again. It was too soon, and you hadn't exactly had the time to recover from the previous in person interaction you had with him.

Oh no. He just saw you.

"Oh. Dave." Karkat greeted. "This is certainly a surprise."

"Oh, yeah, hi. I mean, hello. Yo? Actually, nevermind. I guess I really did mean hi. So, hi there Karkat. How have you been doing? The store treating you well? Asshole customers not keeping you up at night are they? And, wow, you are still cute. And I'm still rambling on like I'm not able to breathe if I don't talk. Not that I can't breathe if I don't talk, but with the amount of shit coming out of my mouth, I really wouldn't be surprised at this point.Sorry, I'm not very good at talking to people in real life."

"You're not very good at talking to them over text. Whatever delusion you created to make yourself think that you are anything less than a huge fucking dork is completely and utterly false, and at this point in time, you really just should accept that you aren't that good at the social aspect of life." Karkat said.

"Karkat, I'm hurt. You of all people should know how cool of a person I am."

Karkat looked around bewildered for a moment.

"A cool person? I don't see anyone like that. All I see is some dork who wears shades indoors to look cool."

"Harsh, but I do actually wear the shades inside for a legitimate reason. My eyes are super sensitive to light, so if I ever took them off, I'm pretty sure I would go blind."

"They seem like that would be extraordinarily uncomfortable to wear while sleeping. I hope to whatever god you believe in that you don't go blind if you remove them in total darkness."

"Yeah, it's fine if I take them off when there is a low amount of light, but I don't like taking them off that often. Not only do they look super cool and protect me from the evil sunlight, they were a gift from my best bro."

"So, sunlight is evil now?" Karkat asked.

"What? No. Sunlight isn't evil now. It has always been evil. It's just been watching over us like the fucking malevolent god it is."

"I don't think the sun can be considered a god. First of all, there are stars that are way bigger than our sun and a whole lot hotter as well. Second of all, the sun is probably going to die in a couple billion years, so we have that to look forward to."

"I can't wait until the evil that the sun is gets defeated."

"Well, it's not going to be in our short ass lifetimes. I can assure you of that."

"Damn it. And here I was, looking forward to the destruction of the sun."

"Well, I wouldn't get my hopes up if I were you. Unless someone makes a video or a video game where the sun blows up. I don't know." Karkat furrowed his brows. "Maybe then you can live out the fantasy of the sun blowing up? I mean, it would be better than nothing, right?"

"Fair enough. Anyway, what are you getting here at the bookstore?" You questioned.

"Well, I was trying to find a new book to read, but I can't really find anything that I haven't read yet that is in the genre I enjoy."

"You're looking for a romance book, right? Terezi said you liked romcoms and cheesy stuff like that, which is honestly kind of adorable, and please just forget I said that last part. It didn't exist. It was never said. Anyway, you clearly must read a lot to not be able to find something that you haven't read."

"I don't know what I should respond to in that sentence. It all sounded like a huge pile of feces that just won't stop coming out. Except the pile of feces is coming out of your mouth instead of your asshole."

"Maybe you should answer the part where I commented on the amount of reading you do because that is super impressive, and it isn't a creepy compliment like suddenly telling you that you are cute is." You explained.

"Ignoring the fact that you called me cute on multiple occasions, I thank you for your acknowledgment of my prowess in reading a various amount of novels."

"You're welcome. Anyway, if you are having trouble finding something to read, you could always try out a different genre, I guess. I mean, I'm pretty sure there are plenty of action books and stuff that you haven't had the pleasure of reading yet."

"I do still prefer romance novels." Karkat said. "What kind of books do you like to read? Or, I guess, more specifically, what book are you planning on getting here? Or are you just browsing?"

"Rose recommended a book series to me, but I am having a bit of trouble finding it. The first book is called Etiquette and Espionage. Have you heard of it?"

Karkat scoffed.

"Of course I've heard of it! I hear about every book with rainbow drinkers that my moirail can get her hands on! However, it was an amazing series with a properly done romance."

"There's romance in it?"

Karkat looked at you in silence for a few moments before taking a deep breath.

"Yes and a very well done romance at that. Scratch that. There are multiple romances throughout the books. Of course, you have the obligatory red romance triangle that the protagonist ends up getting herself in, but it was obvious from the beginning who she would end up with, speaking as one of her redrom interests she was, at the most, black for, even if there was a bit of red/black vacillating. However, the romantic interests are intriguing due to the sheer difference in blood color. You see, the main character is an olive blood and the two who are trying to court her are a rust blood and a seadweller respectively. Which, of course, puts her in the position of trying to choose between one far above and far below her station in society. She was already testing that, being an olive blood going to a highblood school. In addition, her redrom interests are black as hell for each other, often fighting, and it's done so subtly, and that particular romance was very interesting to read about, even if it was kind of a minor romance in the book. In addition to the redrom interests, she actually gets a moirail, and that romance is adorable as hell, and it is honestly so sweet. She also gets a blackrom interest that she never actually acts on due to that interest being someone she considers an actual enemy."

Karkat looked at you in astonishment for a moment.

"Wow. That was probably one of the first times someone has let me go on for that long about romance without telling me to shut the fuck up."

"Why the hell would I tell you to shut up?" You ask. "You're clearly passionate about it, so I see no reason to shoot down that enthusiasm."

"I, uh. Wow." Karkat just kind of stared at you, and you were beginning to start feeling pretty awkward.

So, of course, you did the only thing you could really actually do.

"Yeah, it would be really shitty of me to just fucking tell you to shut up about something you clearly enjoy talking about. Anyway, it is always super nice just to hear people talk about something they love, and it's just kind of sad when people are sorry for enjoying those sorts of things when really it shouldn't be embarrassing at all. If it's something you love, you should embrace it. It's kind of dumb that people just shoot you down like that, bro. Especially since it was really nice to see you light up like that, and oh my god, please just shut me up."

Karkat started laughing. This was the second time you had gone on a long-winded spiel that he laughed at. It was honestly pretty adorable.

"I guess you're right. Hey, you're having trouble finding Etiquette and Espionage, right? Maybe I could help you find it." Karkat suggested.

"That would be fucking fantastic. Please, show me the way to the elusive novel."

"Right this way."

You followed Karkat to an area you must have looked through ten thousand times, and he just pulled a book off the shelf and handed it to you.

"There you go."

"Holy shit. The cover is pink. Pink is such a nice color, you know? It's all happy and nice and shit, and I really should consider getting some pink into my wardrobe now that I think about it. What do you think, Karkat? Would pink fit my complexion well enough?"

"Probably. You wear red well enough, so you should be able to pull off pink really well."

"Really? Well, maybe you could go out with me to help me pick something out. Usually, I would go with my sister, but she's not very good at picking things out that I actually like, and she doesn't typically like the things that I pick out. Also, it's kind of difficult to shop for yourself, you know? Who knows? Maybe I could help you pick out something new as well. It's always nice to find things that you wouldn't usually pick out for yourself, but then you find out you really enjoy it, you know?"

"That's an odd request, but I don't really see why not."

"So you don't mind helping me out with finding a fun outfit?"

"Not at all. It would probably be fun, especially if we are helping out one another."

"Great. You can bring a friend if you want. You know, if you're uncomfortable with hanging out with me for alone for an extended period of time. It's perfectly fine." You said.

"I think I'll actually take you up on that offer. I have a friend who has been pestering me about getting a new outfit for a potential date he's going to have, and it would be fantastic if I had some extra help.He's a complete mess, and I don't know if he can tell his shoes from his cape."

"Clearly he's a fashion disaster, and we're going to have to fix it. However, I'm warning you now, I am also a fashion disaster."

Karkat looked you up and down, and your throat felt dry.

"I think I can deal with you. You're not nearly as much of a fashion disaster as you may think you are."

"Thanks for the confidence booster. Anyway, when and where do you want to meet for the shopping spree? Unless you want to go over the details over Pesterchum."

"We're already here and planning it. Might as well do it now. I'm free this Saturday. So, maybe we could meet up at noon at some restaurant for lunch and then go to the mall to shop for clothes."

"That sounds fucking fantastic. What restaurant though?"

"I could probably find some place nearby the mall to go to that isn't complete fucking shit. I'll have to ask my friend to see if he's good with that time. He probably will be though. He is almost always free. But, on the off chance that he is not, I can always message you over Trollian, but I’ll have to do that anyway to tell you the exact location and time to meet up.”

"It sounds like a plan." You stated. "Anyway, I'm going to pay for this book, and I'm hopefully going to read it at some point in time instead of just allowing it to rest upon my shelf for the rest of eternity. Mark my works. It will be read."

"Good luck with that." Karkat laughed. "But seriously, I do hope you manage to finish it. It will give us something to talk about on the outing."

"I thought we were going to talk about what kind of clothes we want to try out."

"That's actually a pretty good idea. Just let me jot that down." Karkat pretended to write something down on an imaginary notepad. "There we go. If you have any other ideas, be sure to submit them to my website so that I can fully analyze the shit out of them."

"Will do." You suddenly remembered something very important. "Also, I just remembered I need to ask you what literary device kingdom you would rule."

Karkat looked at you like you had just eaten a lemon whole, rind and all.

"What the fuck kind of question is that?"

"An important one. Come on, please answer it. I don't actually have all day, like some may believe."

"Dave, we just spend a good half hour to an hour standing here and talking to each other."

"Shit, really? Never would have guessed that much time had passed. I still would like an answer though."

"I'll think about it. I'll even message you so you can sate your burning curiosity as soon as I figure it out."

"I'll hold you to that." You said, and you finger-gunned at him. "Anyway, I should be off and actually buying this book and possibly reading it at some point in the hopefully near future."

"You do that." Karkat said.

You left kind of awkwardly. And by that, you meant you totally left in the coolest way possible. Yes. Definitely. Didn't even trip or anything. Okay. So maybe you stumbled a bit, but it's whatever, right? You were still kind of cool, and your dignity was definitely left intact.

You go up to the counter and buy your book and then make your way home. You check Pesterchum to see if John has given you an answer yet. None. Absolutely none. What blasphemy. Well, you can always pester someone else about it.

-- turntechGodhead [TG] began pestering gardenGnostic [GG] --

TG: jade i have a very important question for you to answer TG: it is imperative that you answer this message as soon as possible TG: shits super important TG: like the world will be destroyed by a whole bunch of meteors if you dont answer this question TG: it will be fucking catastrophic for everyone involved TG: and everyone involved will just be everyone in the world TG: possibly the universe too who really knows

GG: dave

TG: what

GG: just ask me the question already!!!!

TG: oh yeah right TG: okay ill lay it on you TG: if you were the ruler of a theoretical literary device kingdom, what literary device would you be the ruler of

GG: that question is super weird :/ GG: but i guess i would rule personification??? GG: i havent really thought about it really GG: its kind of super oddly specific too

TG: maybe a little bit TG: but i knew you would rule over personification TG: john is still trying to decide what literary device kingdom he would rule over

GG: oh! GG: maybe he could rule over the hero kingdom!!

TG: is hero a literary device

GG: i think it might be more of a character arc than a literary device but this sight seems to count it as one

TG: ok i guess thats fair

GG: im going to keep looking through these literary devices GG: some of them are kind of funny!! GG: like this one called non sequitur

TG: what the fuck is that

GG: according to the site its a statement that doesnt really make any sense or have any sound logic GG: like saying that if all humans have bones and crocodiles have bones GG: then crocodiles must be humans

TG: what the fuck is that logic

GG: its called non sequitur for a reason!

TG: sounds like something you would find straight off of tumblr TG: hot off the press and ready to consume

GG: that metaphor didnt really make any sort of sense dave

TG: when do my metaphors ever make sense jade

GG: … GG: :/

TG: exactly

GG: i found a literary device that might fit john!

TG: what is it

GG: its called a parrhesia GG: which is basically a fancy way of saying freedom of speech GG: like saying what you mean and stuff like that

TG: sounds perfect TG: i will be sure to inform john of this development TG: pester me if you need anything alright

GG: ok! GG: :)

TG: … TG: 8)

-- turntechGodhead [TG] ceased pestering gardenGnostic [GG] --

-- turntechGodhead [TG] began pestering ectoBiologist [EB] --

TG: okay so i found out what kingdom you would rule over

-- ectoBiologist [EB] is an idle chum! --

TG: alright so you arent here TG: whatever TG: ill tell you anyway TG: you would rule over the parthinian kingdom TG: that was not the correct kingdom TG: that was just a jumble of words that didn’t even make any sort of sense TG: they just happened to start with a p TG: okay just give me a second to double check what it was called TG: parrhesia TG: that still sounds like a jumble of words but i swear its an actual real word TG: it means like freedom of speech or whatever TG: boldness of speech TG: i just realized that all you guys have a literary device that begins with a p TG: prose personification parrhesia TG: and im just sitting over here on my throne of metaphors TG: … TG: super fucking weird TG: anyway TG: see ya

-- turntechGodhead [TG] ceased pestering ectoBiologist [EB] --

You weren’t really sure whether or not to tell someone about seeing Karkat at the bookstore. You were kind of tired, and you were all peopled out for the day, so you just decided to go to sleep instead.

You can’t wait for Saturday.

#davekat #homestuck #dave strider #karkat vantas #john egbert #rose lalonde #jade harley

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aheartshapedgun · 7 years

Text

The Fate of the Furious: Dom and Letty

This will be full of spoilers, so I’m gonna cut it, but I’ve been bombarded on Instagram with questions that I hope this post will answer… Feel free to ask anything it doesn’t. My inbox’s always open. It’s a very fangirl-ish post.

So, someone asked me how the movie can still be worth seeing, if Dom’s the father of Elena’s baby - which he is - and here’s why:

You have to keep in mind that I met Vin like 15 minutes before the screening started, so it was very hard for me to focus during the first 20 minutes or so, and basically the duration of the film. This might not be a 100% accurate cuz I’m sure I missed some of the details, but it’s still what happens in the movie... One way or the other.

First of all, the scene we’ve been waiting for - the bed scene. They were SO IN LOVE in that moment, like two teenagers, that I can accept the fact it was way too short. Letty mentions them seeing a dad and his son and that she thinks he’ll be a great father, and then, if I remember correctly, he lifts the blanket a little and touches her belly and she laughs and says she’s not pregnant and that cute little laugh of her KILLED ME! So sweet omg! She also kisses his chest and touches his chin which I thought was just super adorable. She says “Look at that smile” when she sees that lovey dovey look on his face and that she loves seeing him happy or he says he’s happy. Can’t remember the exact words but one of them definitely mentions happiness and it was so fucking cute, y’all gonna squeal, trust me! Also, when Letty tells him she’s not pregnant (THAT CHUCKLE THO 😍) and says “We need to think about why we never asked the question” or somethin, his smirk was so fucking cute! I DIED! The happiness that radiates from the both of them is the cutest thing I have ever seen in my life I really can’t! And when she mentions his smile I was beyond done!!! FUCKING OMG!

My second favorite scene is when they reunited… or the alley scene… I’m not sure yet… THEIR REUNION CUZ OF THE SMOOCHES AND THE HUGGING! I CANNOT DEAL! So, as we’ve seen in one trailer, Dom jumps his car over the sub and it crashes, but he manages to get out before that happens. Then the sub blows up and since he has no cover, the team shields him from the heat with their cars. I really liked that scene, ‘cause it shows how much of a damn family they are even after all this shit Dom pulled! Then Letty gets out of her car and walks towards him while he’s getting up from the ground and he’s like “I have a lot to explain” and she goes “Starting with that bitch” 😂 They kiss and it’s so cute! Camera focuses on Rome (their faces are blurry but you can still see them smooching) and he says something like “Now THAT’S the Dom I know” That was so sweet and funny! And then the focus goes back on Dom and Letty and they hug and it’s not just any kind of hug but one of those I’m holding the most precious human being in the entire universe in my arms kinda hug and he tells her “You know I never left you… I never will.” and they kiss again…… The way she chuckles mentioning that bitch! She just seems so happy, so relieved! They both do! I think they give each other like 3 little kisses or so and the hugs are emotional af! I think they even let go for a quick second and then hug again, because it feels so damn right. And I was sitting there like CAUSE OF DEATH: CUTENESS! And when he’s already back with the fam and Letty’s in danger but then saves herself by pulling a stunt with her car he’s like “That’s my girl” and I literally squealed so hard cuz HE WAS SO GODDAMN PROUD OF HIS GIRL! I NEEDED JESUS!

Also there’s one point where he’s still bad and they drive next to each other and the looks were killing me! Them too, I think! But then later you have like almost the exact moment where he’s back with the team and I just fucking LOVE how different it is. Letty’s smile!!!!

The scene in the alley where he’s chasing after her cuz she got the case was so intense! I imagined it to be, but it was NOTHING like I imagined it to be. It was WORSE! Even more intense than I ever could’ve imagined! I had TEARS in my eyes during that scene! He sees her getting away and you can tell he’s torn, like he doesn’t wanna stop her but he knows he has to, and so he fires his gun in the air and then happens what we see happening in the trailer. They talk and she tells him “I don’t know why you’re doing this, but I know one thing… You love me and you are not gonna shoot me.” And when she walks away and turns the corner, Rhodes is there putting a gun to Letty’s head. And then Dom puts a gun to Rhodes head (I SCREAMED BECAUSE YAY DOM!) and he’s ready to pull the trigger. You gotta love that no matter how much he wants to protect that baby, his and Elena’s baby, he’s willing to risk that baby getting killed to save his wife. Y’all go watch that scene and tell me it doesn’t mean that his wife is more important to him than that son he’s got and I call you a fucking liar because DAMN! LETTY IS HIS HEART! Anyway, Letty lets go of the case and Dom and Rhodes leave, and the moment Dom’s out of sight, I WAS CRUSHED cuz she breaks down crying I mean she tries not to cry but that doesn’t work very well. She literally tries to steady herself grabbing the wall cuz she knows if she doesn’t do that, she’s gonna fall to the floor and drown in her puddle of tears. It broke my fucking heart! SERIOUSLY I ALMOST CRIED WTF IS MITCHY DOING KILLING ME WITH DA ACTING! 😭 Her emotion in that scene! Dammit! I was a 1000% done!

When Ramsay says they might have to accept the fact that Dom really has gone rogue and insinuated that they should give up on him you hear a loud bang which is Letty slamming the car door shut and then she says like “You wouldn’t even be breathing right now if it weren’t for Dom. He saved you!” and walks past her bumping her shoulder! QUEEN! And Roman goes “You’re just gonna let her do that? Bump your shoulder like that? I mean it was pretty aggressive” Ramsey sits down in front of her laptop and Rome says “What? You’re gonna write her an email?” 😂😂😂 Honestly, even though I kinda knew what to expect, that movie made me feel uneasy af, so every lil’ laugh I could get out of it was a true blessing! So, thank you Roman.

One thing that absolutely disgusted me was the emotion between Dom and Elena. You gotta prepare for that. That was honestly the ONLY thing I didn’t like. And well, the fact that he calls the kid Brian, which is stupid af, but I just pretend his name is Marcus, and Marcus only, so it’s cool. Smh. But about that emotion… When Dom is on the plane and Cipher’s like “I think I have to remind you why you choose to do this” he gets to see Elena. And his face when he sees that baby was a bit odd to me cuz I thought he saw that kid already when Cipher handed him that phone in Cuba… Maybe it was seeing him face to face for the first time, Idk… Anyway, Elena puts her hand up to the glass that separates them, he puts his hand up too. So they touch but not really, you know? And I was screaming internally like WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING THAT YOU IDIOT!!! There was just too much emotion… It kinda grossed me out. It felt pretty intimate to me and I don’t like to think of those two that way. There wasn’t a longing look on his face or love in his eyes or anything, but there definitely was SOMETHING in his eyes and I didn’t like it. I didn’t want him to be looking at Elena that way. Whatever way! I hated it! And I also kinda hated seeing him cry when he sees his kid and him telling Cipher that the most painful moment for him was his son reaching out for him and Dom not being able to touch him… I wish his painful moment had been about Letty… Oh, and Dom looks up to the sky during the BBQ scene (to dead!Elena) and says “I’ll take good care of OUR son” Ugh like why the fuck did he say that? But well, I realized fairly quickly that there’s a solution to this problem and it’s to focus on what’s happening between Dom and Letty cuz if you’re able to ignore that Dom and Elena shit by focusing on the emotion between Dom and Letty, you’re gonna experience one hell of a ride going through all kinds of emotion and it’s fucking epic!

Anonymous said: Were dom and letty together at the end of the movie?

The end scene needs to go up on that list of scenes that are my fav, because it was really beautiful! I always said to people who asked me that I might be able to accept this baby, if I truly believe Letty’s happy and if I don’t have the feeling like this was something that was forced on her, y’know? And tbh, she is so very happy in that last bit! It IS a matter of opinion after all, I guess, but to me, she only seemed a little bummed out that the baby isn’t hers. Just a wee bit. She did seem more like she was just happy to have him back and see him happy and I also think it helped her that the baby was so cute and there was no drama with the baby mama to expect because Elena’s dead. The ending wasn’t even that out of character for me. For Letty, I mean. Just something about it made me feel like I understood why she doesn’t freak out or get mad at him and leaves his sorry ass… Like I said, whatever talk they had about the baby, she didn’t seem like she was pushed to be there. She seemed like she totally wanted to be there. By Dom’s side. With this baby.

When Dom waits for Deckard to arrive with his kid, she stands next to him, and she gets close to him and smiles, saying “Dont worry, he’ll be here soon” and then she pecks him on the arm and that was such a sweet little thing she did there, such a sweet little kiss… I STILL CANNOT! And the moment when Dom introduces his son to her and says she’s the most important person in his universe she got so shy and her smile was so sweet! It was so fucking adorbs HELP ME 😍😍😍 There’s another scene where Dom holds the baby and she says he (the baby) looks cute and then Dom tightens his grip around her and it is such a beautiful moment tbh… They looked so happy omg 😭❤ Maybe she says he’s adorable but she definitely says something about the baby that just makes him so fucking smile and happy and God it is so sweet you don’t wanna miss it for the world! That’s why I’m saying you gotta see it! It’s so easy to ignore the whole Elena thing cuz our babies are so so fucking cute in that movie and precious and THE FOCUS OF ATTENTION! So many times where the camera’s on Letty and we see how she feels even if she’s not saying anything and with Dom too and the vibe they were giving me in that last scene was like they went right back into honeymoon mode after that BBQ like they probably gave the baby to the guys and got right on to that 😂 They really seemed like they couldn’t wait to get back to that thing they were doing in Cuba 😏👉👌😇

Anonymous said: doesn’t a part of you still just want to scream at vin and the writers about the faults in the timeline that they had to make in order for this storyline to be true?! or for writing something like this at all?!

Only like a very tiny part of me. I didn’t know I’d be feeling like this after watching it tbh. I expected to be disappointed. I’m so glad I saw it because I’m really not that pissed anymore. A little maybe. I’m still pissed they did this baby thing, they should’ve casted an older baby not to mess up the timeline (Elena says she found out before he went to get Letty back so at least he’s not a cheater!), but I do love the movie. A LOT. Simply because it’s all about them. About their love and how strong it is. Can’t hate that can ya? Those scenes between Dom and Letty are full of love, hurt, desperation, longing, … so many things, and F. Gary did an awesome job capturing that. And I swear, Vinchelle brought their A-fucking-game! Their acting is off the charts! Insane! Especially in those moments they have together. So yeah… Letty not being the mother of his first child sucks an awful lot, but that movie screams! It screams, Letty is his true love, his one and only, and they literally can get through anything. Any. Fucking. Little. Thing. They love each other so much and they’re my babies and like I said I cried at some points 😭❤ Seeing the movie was really good for me. It helped me cope with this huge mess we were thrown into. I seriously can’t wait to see it again! I wouldn’t be surprised if you feel the same but OMG the scene where they reunite is absolutely beautiful! All the smooching and hugging and the way they both chuckle! God that was the fanficiest moment of them all I think 😂

Anonymous said: What happens in the after credit scene in F8?

There wasn’t a tag ending, but I felt like there was still more story to tell, so I really hope they’ll do at least ONE movie after this… I mean to hell with it, gimme both! And I hope she’ll get pregnant. I’ll be sad if she won’t.

Anonymous said: Is Luke Evans in Fast 8?

He has a small cameo, yes. It was awesome!

Anonymous said: do you think ramsey is gonna be anyones love interest in fast 8?

Ramsey is not anyone’s love interest, but there’s a funny scene between her and Tej and Rome at the end. I won’t spoil that 😋

#fast 8 #the fate of the furious #dom and letty #fast and furious 8

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