#There might be some triggering things

[rythmicjea]

Hobbyism is the best way to get through grief. ~Cole Sprouse

NEW FIC BACKSTORY

Okay... so... This is an odd one (and a long one). This is kind of representative of my current "chaos era". It's a bit of a story and I put most of it in the A/N. But this was not a story I was ever intending to write. In fact, I am not part of the fandom (scandalous I know), and better yet, I had no idea that the show even existed until this past November... But apparently it was big! My excuse is that I was not of the demographic for it age wise. I think if it's age appropriate, anyone can watch anything. Rock on, man.

The backstory of this goes, I found out that my baby boy (cat) Jayne, had advanced kidney disease. For a brief and shining moment, I thought that he would beat the odds. Unfortunately, he was gone within two weeks. I held him as he passed. I have a little altar to him on my desk because he will never be forgotten. But, in my grief, I knew I needed to find an outlet. While I can't journal write (I absolutely hate it lol) I can tell stories. And I wanted to write something very dark and nihilistic that basically combined Peaky Blinders with Riverdale (Chaos Era).

So while I was falling down the Jeronica rabbit hole, I was gathering playlists and mashup videos to aid in my inspiration. But, the story refuse to appear. Instead, YouTube kept suggesting clips from a show I had never heard of. And the clips were OLD. Like from over 10 years ago. Though I said I was uninterested the recs kept coming. So I did ONE google search. I read ONE synopsis. I saw a cast list and I saw a timeline of a relationship. I thought that was all I needed. My brain said NOPE!

The timeline of this relationship ended every entry with "and they hugged". I was very confused about why this couple was only hugging. Then when I saw that the last episode was graduation I got a little more incensed. I had two puzzle pieces that didn't connect without a third. So, I asked around. I have friends that were of the age demographic at the time this was on. And every one of them said that 1.) they loved the show and 2.) It was a very Disney show. Now, there were some sporadic kisses here and there but I remember being that age in high school and while I wasn't some "light BDSM scene on the second time I ever had sex" (Looking at you Bughead in Riverdale...) I definitely did more than just hug my high school boyfriend.

Even though I wasn't satisfied with the answer I thought that was the end of it. My brain had other ideas. My brain told me that if I didn't write this story then I would never write again. Well. That's death to a creative type like me. While I never wrote every day or even put out stories consistently, I was still crafting stories in my head. I needed to be able to write. I was in a desperate state. So I thought "fine, I'll write 3000 words, delete it, and then write what I want."

I wrote 10,000 words in one sitting.

I wrote 50,000 words in 18 days.

I didn't watch the show until I was like 80% done with the fic.

It currently stands over 100,000 words.

If you've made it this far you're going "WHAT IS THE STORY?!"

Okay, I'll tell you. It turns out I was being recommended the clips because of an actor. This actor is Cole Sprouse. I knew him mostly as Ben Geller from Friends. I didn't know he had an actual career before Riverdale. I just thought he did something as a kid, and then came back after college. I was so wrong... So so so so so wrong...

If you guessed The Suite Life of Zack and Cody and The Suite Life on Deck you would be correct.

This massive story started as a way to explain why Cody and Bailey "only hugged". Turned into a love story. I made Zack not straight and married to a man with identical twin girls. London is a pediatric surgeon (and I still stand by that decision knowing what I know now). And Cody and Bailey are probably the least likable characters in the entire thing but they are relatable. This is a story of trying to find love after you discover the amount of abuse you went through. Why running from things is not ideal. And maybe, even when you live an outlandish life, there's some normalcy to discover. It's kind of dark, but there's a lot of humor. If you're not familiar with the show, I would just think of it as an original work. (I know, I know... certain death for a fanfic writer lol)

If you enjoy it, please drop a kudos and my comments section is open and I welcome kind and constructive criticism and questions. Like, fuck me up with questions. Please.

#ao3 #ao3 fanfic #writing #writers #cole sprouse #dylan sprouse #Cody Martin #Zack Martin #the suite life of zack and cody #The suite life on deck #Bailey Pickett #London Tipton #debby ryan #Brenda Song #Zack is gheeyyyy #Cody is kind of a dick but in the BEST way #There might be some triggering things #This story may ruin your childhood... #and i don't care

[forecast0ctopus]

herbie fully loaded

#made goofy drawings of him n dan but i like how they turned out.. might make stickers lmao #i’ll post the full thing if i do.. #i’ve never done stickers so i must attempt at some point ig #if i like the samples i get im pulling the trigger ill do it i’ll order stickers for real #i’ve been meaning to make ace attorney stickers for years but i’m a coward #this crop is like 1x1’ lmao

[uncanny-tranny]

This whole "you're responsible for your triggers, nobody else >:(!" argument is weird to me because it's like... we know that ultimately, we are in charge of our trauma and our trauma responses, and I don't think everybody genuinely thinks that they have no agency over how their trauma can impact their life and the way they navigate it. So it's weird to me when peoples' first response is to remind us that our trauma is only up to us.

To me, it comes across like people are upset that traumatized people and people with triggers have boundaries related to their triggers and that it would be an asshole move to be like "fuck your boundaries! I do what I want around you!"

It is completely understandable if you're not able to accommodate somebody's triggers, but you don't have to put up a veneer of putting the blame on everybody else. It's okay to have conflicting needs, and that isn't really anybody's fault. Just move on, and don't engage with that person. There doesn't always have to be a Bad Guy in every situation.

#trauma #mental health #mental health advocacy #and like... in general our requests might be 'please don't talk about [x] AROUND me' #not 'never ever even THINK about [x] or i will actually kill you' #like there is a difference and too often people take boundaries as like... a personal affront or accusation #i have some triggers and sometimes i have to put up boundaries about it and it's shitty when people act like i've killed them #like once i tried *talking* about my triggers with my dad and he acted like i was so unreasonable for being triggered by my abuse #(he's much better now that he has sorted his own things out and i'm actually proud of him for that) #(last night i talked about a boundary and he was like 'oh because it's a trauma trigger?' and i was like YES. THANK YOU FOR GETTING IT)

[discountalien-pancake]

I keep thinking these covers will get easier but they just get more elaborate. And creepy. Given how on-the-nose this cover is, you wouldn’t think it took @longsightmyth and I literal hours of back and forth in the harem discord to hammer out all the specifics!

#book covers #my art #truthteller #fireheart #fireheart fsunday #but at least I could jump around this one and be drawing something *different* #wintercry was just: shades a rose. shades a rose. shades a rose. shades— #shit does this need trigger warnings?? #tw strangulation #tw animal harm #it’s all symbolic!! neither thing happens in myth’s fic!! #well there might be some animal harm but nobody is sewing a live canary onto a dress bodice

[pastafossa]

Idk who needs to hear this but if something traumatic happened to you a while back and you've been doing well healing, and then have an incident that prompts an anxiety attack, that's ok. It doesn't diminish the progress you've made. It doesn't mean you've fucked up. It doesn't mean it'll never get better. It doesn't mean you're getting worse. It just means you've got some more healing to do.

#had some religious trauma smack me in the face recently #which was not on my bingo card of Things That Might Trigger A Mild Anxiety Attack this week but here we are #having tripped right over the sleeping dog #but i'm reminding myself and anyone who needs to hear it #that it's still progress #healing takes time

[retros-artandstuff]

vriska + a transmasc dave doodle

#tryna get into colored pencils again we'll see how it goes #its been a while since ive done a good tag ramble #but like i dont hv anything to ramble about #my art #traditional art #doodles #fanart #homestuck #homestuck fanart #dave strider #dave strider fanart #vriska serket #vriska fanart #oh actually i do hv smth to ramble about today #that being scheduled posts #yknow scheduled posts are actually really convinient and helped me quite a bit #like i used them for a couple months and honestly really liked useing them cuz it allowed me to hv a pretty consistent posting schedule #but in the end i just didnt feel right with it mostly due to the fact that even with it set to post three times a week it felt weird to hav #some of my drawings posting weeks after i finished them. like they were old news to me already but they were barely being released to every #one else it just felt weird for me ig. not to mention that like on the rare occassions that i didnt have anything to post i felt obliged to #draw smth just so i would have smth to post and most of the time that led to me being unhappy with my art. so now ive just decided like fuc #it imma post whenever i want and honestly im really happy with that even if i might be going a little trigger happy with the posting button #recently lmao. ive just been drawing a whole lot and hv so much to post its insane. hell i still hv things in my gallery that i needa post #but ill save those for the next couple of days lol but yeah thanks for coming to my very long ted talk/ramble and goodnight 😴 #damn im such a yapster what the hell

[goddessofroyalty]

The fic this belongs from will likely never see the light of day because it's a "write until it's out of my head not finished" thing but wanted to share these paras because I like the image.

Pairings: Zoro/Sanji

Tags: omegaverse, past-mpreg

-----------

Even with the girl sleeping in Zoro's lap - the thin limbs of childhood dangling limply as her head rests against the swordsman's chest, green hair a curtain over her curled brows softened by sleep. One of Zoro's arms is wrapped snugly around her waist to keep her secure, but other than that he seems barely aware of her as he listens in to the two captain's conversation. Fatherhood an easy burden for him. Although Law supposes he would have had plenty of practice with Strawhat as his captain.

As if he can read Law's thoughts and plans to prove him right Strawhat leans back on his chair. Stretching his upper body towards the gallery.

"Sanji! I'm hungry!"

"You're always hungry!" Zoro says, reaching out with the arm not holding his daughter to tug at the captain's shoulders. The girl's sleep undisturbed by her father's movement. That tired after a day of running around with the Strawhat crew.

#Zosan #zoro x sanji #roronoa zoro #monkey d. luffy #Omegaverse #One Piece Omegaverse #mpreg #One Piece mpreg #I accidently a ficlet #The other reason why the whole thing probably won't be posted #is it's a lot darker than this moment #and would need some pretty serious trigger warnings #(somehow Law is my character to put through the wringer) #Might steal this bit for another fic though

[mixelation]

OH MY GOD I forgot about the tag system - do you even know how much I scrolled - holy shit I'm in tears - thank you so much btw

oh my god, YES, please use the tags dsjfdjsh

also i guess i do have an "au round-up" post that's like a baby master post here. it has the tags i use + a link to view them chronologically. if you're new or have months of "catching up," the "chrono" view of the tag is probably what you want!!

i do kind of assume anyone chronically on tumblr enough to be following my silly AUs is pretty good at tag usage? but if you're not: i do try my best to tag all my tori AUs so that you can look at every posted in order. make sure the URL shows "/tagged/" rather than "/search/" and you will see everything in the tag in reverse chronological order, plus you can add /chrono/ to see every post in chronological order. afaik chrono only works if you're using a certain view: you have to do like mixelation.tumblr.com/tagged/reborn au/chrono. and i think chrono might just not be on the app? i also do this bc i imagine some people follow me who do not actually care about seven AUs with one OC and might want to blacklist those tags as spam control.

posting random thoughts on an AU out of order and then only writing random scenes is a chaotic way to do it, but using the tag and the /chrono/ function does reduce the chaos a whole bunch

#adjacent note on tags: #my policy for tagging is that i cannot GUARANTEE tags bc quite frankly im bad at it #so i don't take requests for tags for content/trigger warnings #but i do like being able to track my own AUs so i've been pretty motivated to tag things #toriverse #i might go through a tag EVERYTHING 'toriverse' at some point but i don't like the mass post editor

[snekdood]

bitches be like. i hate vegans so much that i’ve decided i like killing animals and its fine and i dont feel bad and animals dont have feelings and its fine and im cool subversive and different and edgy and like to post fucked up stuff to make vegans uncomfortable bc im just so cool

#you sound like every cishet republican man to me #you're not a Cool Subversive Leftist you're literally regressing by seeing animals as just objects of your pleasure and thats it lmao #im sorry but you dont just get to throw out all of veganism. it does infact have some roots in leftism. #you can sit there and cope with the fact you agree w some vegan talking point by calling it 'animal welfare' all you want #doesnt change the fact that a lot of those ideas in those circles were formed by vegans. #damn woooah vegans arent a monolith and dont all agree on the same shit woooahhh who knew #literally i have no idea how we even got to this point or how this would be surprising. #when i was on vegan twitter bitches were arguing all the fucking time within it. ur really gonna sit ther en tell me they're all secret #eco fash that hates native ppl and people who have to eat meat? ya sure??? #you would think the individuals on tumblr- of all places- would understand how frustrating it would be to be grouped in with the worst #members of their community as if you represent them and are the sole spokesperson #you'd think they'd hate when someone jumps to conclusions about them based on their lifestyle #but naur. i think yall take it too personally. as if a vegan just being in a room is somehow trying to force you to be vegan. #literally grow tf up. #if a vegan being in the same room with you triggers feelings in you that you Have to stop eating meat- i really think thats a you problem #bud. homeboy hasnt even spoke to you leta lone look at you and apparently you feel this weird pressure now #idk man dont you think that pressure might be coming within?? maybe.... you do infact feel things and feel a lil guilty abt eating meat? #not telling you to stop... i still eat meat here n there. but at least im honest with myself about how it makes me feel to do it. #its infact normal to take a second to think about the loss someone made in exploitation to provide you with whatever. #if you can let yourself feel a lil guilt about buying a fast fashion thing you can sure as fuck finally extend your fuckin empathy to #animals and stop treating them like objects or toys.

[jojosgaylittleadventure]

This is the fourth fic in my Josuyaus series that takes place while they're still in high school You can find my series here I also have a master post of all my Josuyasu writing here

Summary: After a study session gone wrong, Josuke finds himself needing somewhere he can feel safe and at home and that some where turns out to be Okuyasu. Tags: Post-Canon, Pre-Relationship, Friendship, Hurt/Comfort, the following tags are not from/between the ship (just an fyi), Non-Consensual Kissing, Non-Consensual Touching, Side Character/Main Character Attempted Sexual Assault, Attempted Sexual Assault, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Victim Blaming

#I LIIIIIVVVVVEEE!!!!!!!! #sorry for going missing for like 500 years and then coming at you with a heavy ass fic #this is one of the longest fics i've written so far and it took so long because i wanted to do it right #any of my regular readers please read the tags as this is a heavier fic that might cover topics that some people might find triggering #i know that's not my normal thing so i just wanted to give an extra warning so no one get's jump scared tho a lot of it is rather mild #in my opinion #anyways... #Jojo Part 4 #jjba Part 4 #Diamond is Unbreakable #Josuke Higashikata #Okuyasu Nijimura #Josuyasu #Sophia Writes #Part 4 #Josuke #Okuyasu #Tomoko #She's in there for a scene or two lol #Fic #i'm low-key nervous about posting this one because it feels like it really took a lot of me to write it >.> #it was emotionally taxing but i really wanted to write it

[cobwebbed-crow]

Noise in public is absolutely an accessibility issue. By the way.

#original post #disability #anyways don't bring your screaming children on planes please #if you can at all avoid it #I see people making the argument that the worse thing that can happen if you bring screaming children/babies on airplanes is: #“some people might feel a bit annoyed by it” #that's just not fucking true #the worst that can happen is that you'll end up triggering someones migraines and leaving them in debilitating pain for hours/days #“well those people should just wear headphones” #<- NOT the point of my post #plus headphones aren't like...magic devices that block out every sound. you can still hear background noise even with them on #should I tag this as discourse? #Not sure.

[howlingaround]

Little Cousin Dodo on an adventure

#Faction Paradox #My Art #Yea its ugly but i wanted to draw it anyway #Not happy how it turned out but maybe i will redo it with colours when i get good at art #Also i hid the rest under the cut because it might upset some people but i dont know what trigger warnings should be used for that thing?

[eeblouissant]

Today I’m thinking about the time Dorothy said that she gave herself a perm during her ‘midlife crisis’ in response to Stan impulsively buying a car

#does this mean her hair is or was particularly straight at some point in her life ? #just how curly was it ??!!! #this is also adding to my hc that she chopped her hair herself after the phone call #I’m thinking. it sounds like she went thought a few different ‘eras’ & now I *need* to draw what those eras might have looked like 😭 #it’d be a fun project !! #im feeling especially attached to Dorothy lately #<- more than normal ? #that’s my baby #the golden girls #dorothy zbornak #personal #she couldn’t have done that perm too long before meeting Blanche actually #like 5-10 years max. since she’s 55 at the start of the show #hmmmmm im thinking many thoughts many things to think about #or did the perm go terribly and *that* triggered the hair cut #I have to KNOW I have so many thoughts

[basofy]

hmmmm i guess i can let these out in the wild now

these are doodles i did the next day i watched that convo, while still having a bad stomachache, so they're more like vent art

idk if im the only one that took this thing extremely seriously, but it made me sad and it keeps making me sad the more i think about it

img that describes what the scene felt like to me

#my feelings on the matter are extremely conflicted #because im not really opposed to the themes that were explored #but i keep rejecting the conversation no matter what #wheter it's because of the execution or because this happened like 10 years later i dunno #it was such a strange thing to be surprised with #sometimes i dont know if it was made to be serious or not #my main conflict is how different it feels from how lisa tends to tackle these things #i was talking to a friend and they mentioned that it could be made to feel like a joke at first and then get rly dark #because thats how it feels when youre a kid in the position jack was in #i keep wishing there was more to that though #anything that showed that the game cares about jack after it #i think it was made as some sort of trap? to see who took it as a joke and who took it seriously maybe #but it keeps giving me a stomachache im rly bad with triggers haha #didnt expect my comfort game to put this right on my face and leaving it all up to me so im not having a lotta fun #my stuff #lisa rpg #this was my first fanart for the DE wtfff #still wish they got something extra that wasnt a pain to watch just becuz i like both charas #in fact i dont understand some of the choices in the conversations but there are some i liked a lot #i might probably still like garth out of nostalgia but it's random sometimes i like him sometimes im grossed out and so on #lisa garth #garth lisa the painful #jack lisa #if ya need this tagged tell meee #honestly this goes further than 'i hate garth now im gonna send him to the roulette' for me #i dont stop anyone from hating him my issue is with the scene in itself i think. i just wasnt expecting this #also be nice in the tags this thing makes me overthink so much lololol #everytime i make art for this thing i end up changing my mind like i dont feel the same way about the first doodle anymore #upd8 from 3 months later im more at peace with this thing MENTAL ILLNESS CURED YAYYYY #i just allow it to make me sad when it has to

[variousqueerthings]

actually you know whose reaction I'd be really curious about, potentially coming across fourteen in the shops? Francine!

#francine jones #martha jones #the doctor #dw #doctor who #the (second?) last time they saw each other she nodded to him #and i tend to interpret that as a mix of 'thank you for talking me down' 'hey we survived hell together' and 'thank goodness #martha is coming back to us and you and i both know it's the right thing even though i know you're a fucking mess too but also pls go' #not in the sense that martha was trapped with ten but that ten maybe Could have convinced her to stay potentially #or even just that francine was afraid that ten might do so/martha could possibly choose ten over them #also just that in some ways the jones fam saw the doctor and the master being An Terrifying Other Species moreso than most #there's that relief when martha comes back like they weren't sure she'd be walking back inside #so they dont end it on Bad terms technically #but also potentially... sees fourteen and it's a trigger? sees fourteen and is afraid for martha? #sees fourteen and assumes the end of the world is coming back? sees fourteen and is just... oh... hoped id never see you again #sees fourteen and it's an awkward british 'how have things been? good. you? yeah good. got a garden now. oh that's nice' #(was francine there when martha was on that joint call -- she was wasnt she? #i cannot remember if there's any Looks between them there that indicate how she feels about ten at that point) #anyway i think francine should've been in martha's final scene i think francine was the most important part of martha's life #that symbolised the ways that ten had affected that life #and seeing how francine potentially felt after end of time would have been such a strong indicator of how that story ended there #the tenth doctor #the fourteenth doctor #doctor who spoilers #dw spoilers

[itspileofgoodthings]

💕💚

#so. Rambling on this my 28th birthday #I think I might have some kind of hormonal/mood imbalance #maybe. I think that could be likely #and I also think I have very fast emotional cycles #so I work through things quickly #and so I’m in kind of a pattern right now where I post in utter anguish #and the anguish is REAL and I am by no means faking it #but then it resolves. Not even the thing that causes the anguish but the feeling itself #and I just feel better and then I move on #and I am trying to get somewhat of a handle on what exactly it is #and I know I don’t owe anyone an explanation of what I post #but I guess also I would like to #and I think—as I type this out—that what’s happening to me right now #is TWO things #and one of those things is the very real very new pains of adulthood and life #that are hitting me like a shock to the system #but then ALSO some old emotional echoes that need to be purged from my psyche #that are not in fact how I want to deal with things or react to things #but which flare up in response to triggers #and cause anguish so bad it is literally physical #and I would love to be able to distinguish between the two #because there IS much that is hard and scary and painful and confusing in my personal life right now #and also there are simply old wounds and fears at play that I would like very much to set down #and allow myself to change. In response to which I would like to choose a new way of thinking!!!! #a truer and different attitude! #and yeah. it’s so hard. It’s SO HARD. It’s SO HARD TO ACCEPT THAT IT’s BOTH and it just AHHHGHHHHHHHHHHHJJ #!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! anyway thank you for listening and for seeing and for taking the cries of anguish posts #I guess I just wanted a follow-up of some kind #because sometimes I feel insane and I feel like I LOOK insane #and it’s awful