#THEY ARE KILLING ME CAUSE THEY ARE SO STINKING CUTE

[livelovecaliforniadreams]

#HELP!!!! #THEY ARE KILLING ME CAUSE THEY ARE SO STINKING CUTE #I LOVE THEM TO BITS #creddie #carly x freddie #freddie x carly #carly shay #freddie benson #nathan kress #miranda cosgrove #soft #kiss #kisses #kissing #cute things #gif #gifs #gifset #3x10 #icarly #icarly reboot #icarly revival

[meatonfork]

Can I request the team maybe finding out grim hordes cute stuff?. Maybe something like plushies or even Sanrio stuff. They might be kinda embarrassed by it since their technically a young adult in the military who’s killed countless people but still collects cute stuff and guards it like a dragon.

Hoarder

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pairings: platonic 141 x grim

warnings: none, grim being shy

summary: the team finds out grim hoards

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you knew you shouldn’t be embarrassed by this. it was nothing compared to your job. but, you just couldn’t help it. it truly caused you to cave in on yourself.

you had been on a solo mission. just some quick intel gathering. it went fairly smoothly, and you were back at base in no time.

you were awfully tired, though. ready to crash in your bed, and sleep the next day away.

all you wanted to do was cuddle up with your stuffed animals, and get some well deserved sleep.

but, there was a change in plans. you had stopped by the commons to say goodnight to your team, but the sight you saw made you pause in your steps.

your duffel bag slipped from your hands as they came to cover your mouth in shock.

a bright red dusted your features, ears a stark pink.

“oh- hey guys, haha” your voice was sheepish, a small, uneasy smile on your face.

“what’s going on..?”

“grim. why the hell do you have all these stuffed animals? they cover the whole couch!” gaz’s voice was higher pitched, an effort not to laugh straight in your face.

the guys, save from ghost, had amusement dancing on their features.

“no, because this is really embarrassing. you weren’t supposed to know. how did you even find them?” you shrieked. you rushed forward to try to scoop them all up, but there were just too many. some fell to the floor, right out of your arms.

the bun your hair was in started to come lose from your frantic efforts.

“grim, you’re an adult. why do you have them?” price almost sounded disappointed, but he was too busy laughing to actually play the part of disappointed dad.

“look, this is embarrassing. i’m killer. but i can’t help it! they’re so cute! i get them when we go on missions. just- stuff ‘em in my pack.” you made a stuffing motion with your hand.

“now, will you please help me take these back to my room?”

ghost stepped forward, grabbing a small black cat plushie, and squeezed it lightly, “i like this one..”

“oh! yeah, keep it!” you beamed up at him.

“aye, i wan’ one!” soap rushed forward, gaz right behind him.

they helped you put them back, soap and gaz grabbing their favorite ones.

you finally relaxed, laid out on all your stupid little stuffed animals. you reached over and grabbed a little otter. his face was so fluffy.

you purses your lips. you gave a small hum.

“price never got one…”

you jumped out of bed, otter in hand, and made your way to price’s office.

price was sat at his desk, head in hand, filling out paperwork. a soft knock rang out.

“yeah, come in!”

the door opened softly, your face peaking through the slight opening.

“hey, cap. can i come sit?” your voice was soft. the faint smell of a cherry vanilla cigar danced around the room.

“‘course.”

“i brought you this! you never got one. didn’t want you to feel left out or anything… he kinda looks like ya. the eyes, man. it’s definitely the eyes.” you let out a huff of laughter.

you stuck your hand out, the otter looking back up at price.

his soft eyes looked from the small plush otter, and back up to you.

his hand went out and grabbed the stuffed animal.

“huh. i guess it kinda does look like me. thanks kid.” his head turned back up to you, a kind smile on his face.

“yeah. of course! no problem, cap. i’ll see you tomorrow.” you make your way to the door.

“hey, kid.”

your hand paused on the door, half way out of the room already, “yeah?”

“sleep well, yeah?”

you nod, “yeah.”

you give a smile, and made your way to bed.

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a/n: thank you for reading, stinks <3

#grim au #john price #kyle gaz garrick #john soap mactavish #simon ghost riley #soap cod #ghost #john price x reader #john soap mactavish x reader #simon ghost riley x reader #kyle gaz garrick x reader #soap #soap x reader #ghost x reader #cod #cod mw2 imagine #cod mw22 #ghost cod #cod mw2 #cod x reader #141 x reader #task force 141 #grim is a baby #real

[sorrowfulrosebud]

𝕮𝖔𝖓𝖙𝖊𝖓𝖙: Katsuki and Keiko spend their first Father’s Day together

𝕲𝖊𝖓𝖗𝖊: tooth-rotting fluff

𝕬/𝕹: this is like 2 days late but oh well lol

The sun filtered through your blinds, casting you and your husband in an ethereal glow. You stirred at the beeping of your alarm, before grinning as you realise the day. It was you and your husband’s first ever Father’s Day, so you had the day jam-packed with activities.

Katsuki grunted in his sleep as you soothed him by playing with the ashy blonde dandelion fluff that is his hair. Sleepy eyes cracked open slightly before smiling at you.

“Mph, g’morning beautiful,” he yawned as he pulled you closer, nestling his head against your chest. Gentle hands threaded through his hair.

“Good morning handsome, how did you sleep?” You asked him, basking in his sleepy nature.

“Eh, it wasn’t horrible. God, those physio sessions better start working soon because my back is killing me,” he grunted, fighting sleep.

“Why don’t you go back to sleep, baby? Get some more rest and let me and Keiko take care of you today?” You smiled at him. Katsuki cracked an eye open before smirking slyly.

“What, you and the brat gonna pamper me today? Bring it on!” He let out a yawn as you continued to play with his hair.

“Fucking hell baby, your hands are magic,” he muttered tiredly. He delved deeper into the duvet and you tucked him in, patting his back until he delved back into blissful slumber.

Today was gonna be the best day for him, you were gonna make sure of it.

You softly padded into your baby son’s nursery, careful to miss standing on his arrangement of toys. He slept peacefully in his adorable cot, no thoughts or worries as he snoozed away. Upon hearing your footprints, his breath-taking (E/C) eyes fluttered open as he showed you a gummy smile. Chubby feet supported his weight as he bounced up and down in his crib, desperate for some morning cuddles.

“Good morning my handsome boy! Look at you, already to go!” You cooed as you picked him up, blowing raspberries into his chubby cheeks, earning a happy giggle. You pretended to be grossed out by him and held him at arms length, causing more giggles to be let out.

“Well, we can’t make daddy breakfast in bed when you stink! Come on, mister. Time to clean up!”

After cleaning up your stinky baby, you dressed him up in a tiny dynamight costume, leaving the eye mask until later. You couldn’t stop cooing at your son’s cuteness and saved a variety of photos to send to Mina.

You heaved Keiko to your waist as you began cooking Katsuki’s breakfast; grilled salmon, a bowl of miso soup alongside some rice and a cup of strong Colombian coffee. Keiko burbled as you cooked, trying to stir the soup but splashing some on you.

“You’re a messy pup today, son! This breakfast is for daddy, it’s not for me to wear!” You giggled as you tickled your son, creating a symphony of happy laughter.

Upon the cooking being completed, you arranged everything super neatly on the table before placing the card Keiko made him in playgroup in a bag, as well as his gift.

“Why don’t we go wake your daddy up, hmm Keiko? Let’s show him the breakfast you made him,” you asked, heart pounding in excitement when your son held your hand. His face erupted into beams of pure light at the mention of his father’s name, babbling happily and bouncing his little legs.

You managed to arrange everything neatly, including managing to get the eye mask and fake gauntlets on an increasingly fussy baby desperate to see his father.

“C’mon Kei, let’s wake him up,” you whispered as you held your son’s hand. You pushed the door open as Keiko let out a happy yell at the sight of his dad.

Katsuki had been awake for at least half an hour, listening to your laughter but decided to pretend to be asleep for your sakes. His eyes opened in surprise at his son in his costume, ego swelling and eyes pricking.

“Baba!” Keiko attempted, reaching to grab his father’s face. Katsuki swooped down and grabbed him, causing Keiko to let out a massive laugh as his daddy pretended to eat him.

“Look at my little hero! That’s a pretty cool costume, Kei! I’m sure the original wearer is just as handsome as you,” he smirked confidently, making you shake your head and try to suppress a laugh.

You walk over to your two favourite boys, giving each one a kiss.

“Happy Father’s Day, baby. Me and Kei are gonna make it the best day ever,” you murmured into his ear. Katsuki grinned and murmured back

“It’s already off to an amazing start.”

Katsuki let out an impressed puff at the sight of breakfast foods spread across the table. Keiko babbled in his father’s buff arms, wiggling to be let down.

“Jesus friggin’ Christ babe, this looks…” he tailored off, happy grin polluting his face. You smiled in relief; you were so glad he liked it!

“Well, dig in my love! Keiko and I made everything from scratch,” you took Keiko from Katsuki’s arms and placed him in his high chair, tickling at his chubby ankles. You alternated between feeding your baby and feeding yourself; Keiko demolishing every small bite of fish and baby food.

“How is it baby?” You turned to ask Katsuki, giggling as you catch him shovel a large portion of rice into his mouth.

“Ish fucking delicious,” he drooled, savouring every bite.

“You and Kei must have worked really hard on this,” he smiled, poking at his chunky baby’s tummy, making him squeak in happiness.

“You deserve it, Ki. Eat up so Kei can give you his present!” You ushered him to eat, giving your baby the last of his food and hoisting him out of his high chair.

“Ma’am yes ma’am,” your husband playfully saluted as you gently smacked his arm in earnest.

After breakfast was cleaned away, you pulled Katsuki and Keiko into the living room. Katsuki sat on the couch as you pulled Keiko to the other side of the room.

Your knees groaned as you kneeled down, handing Keiko the small gift bag.

“Why don’t you go give your daddy the present you made him?” You asked excitedly. Katsuki full expected his son to start crawling as he usually does, but his breath hitched in his throat as his baby took a shaky step. And another, then another!

Keiko was soon toddling to his father, gift bag in tow and huge proud smile on his chubby face. Katsuki couldn’t believe it; his son could walk! He lifted Keiko high into the air, just before he would fall.

“When the hell did you learn this, eh?! Did you plan this?!” He looks back at you, pride flushing his face. You nodded back, tears of joy remaining unshed.

“Mhm! We’ve been practicing this for weeks, haven’t we bubba?” Keiko laughed in response.

“Open his gift!”

Katsuki set his baby on his knee and opened the delicately wrapped bag. Inside, a colourful amalgamation of air-dry clay consisting of Katsuki’s hero costume palate resting inside.

“I-is this-?” He looked at you astonished. You nodded and grinned tearfully again.

“Yep, the teachers at Keiko’s playgroup asked us to send in photos of the fathers and helped the children sculpt you all for a father’s day! Didn’t he do such a good job!” You joined your husband and son on the couch, wrapping your arms around your family.

Katsuki hugged you both tightly, kissing Keiko’s pink cheeks and your temple. Your heart fluttered at the small sniffles he let into your hair.

“Please don’t cry, Suki! You’ll make me cry you sensitive old man,” you giggled as you let out a small sob. You were so proud of your baby boy, and judging from Katsuki’s reaction, he was too.

“I love you both so fucking much, don’t you ever forget that,” he sobbed quietly. He never imagined that life would be like this; being your rival in first year, to friends, then best friend, then in a relationship, agency partners and eventually married and with child.

Keiko burbled confusedly at his father’s tears. He thought this day was to make him happy, not cry! He let out a big puff and yelled with his whole chest the one thing he constantly heard you say to his father.

“Dada! Wub you!” Keiko determinedly yelled to his father, causing him to snap his head towards him in shock. Katsuki gaped like a fish as he looked towards you, only to see a mirrored image of temporary petrification.

“What did you say, bubba? Say it again, say it again!” You exclaimed excitedly.

“Wub dada! Wub dada!” He exclaimed, basking in the amazed looks between each other. His chubby cheeks were attacked with kisses as he giggled happily.

“Did you teach him this too?!” Katsuki asked joyfully. His son’s first words were him expressing his love for his father, on the day celebrating him no less! You shook your head quickly.

“No, the little guy must have picked it up from us,” you say, tickling Keiko’s neck.

“Mph, phuck!” He giggled out, expecting the same reactions as before. You both completely froze, before you glared at Katsuki.

“I, er, uhhhhhh-“ he garbled out, trying to find the words. You rolled your eyes in contempt.

“Keiko, you can’t say that word. And Katsuki, get yourself ready. We’re going out for a Father’s Day event at Sato’s bakery,” you scolded, bringing Keiko to get changed.

Katsuki only looked at you both with pure love.

God he fucking loved his family.

#bnha x reader #bakugou x reader #bakugou fluff #bakugou x reader fluff #bakugou #domestic bakugou #domestic bakugou x reader #bakugou and his child on Father’s Day *sobs* #him inadvertently teaching his child to swear lololol #father’s day #he’s the best daddy fr #so proud of his baby boy

[chokkito]

RATE YOUR FRIENDS‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️

NAWWWW I CANT RATE THEM I LOVE THEM ALL A LOT 💔💔💔 anyways here we go (if any of you guys see this thats just a joke ok i love yall a lot <3)

Hiyori - 0/10 (10/10 actually love you mwah)

Hate this bastard rat, made me want to bang a uglyass soldier from a game i never played 💔💔 also stinks a lot!!!!

Hiatus - 9/10

Love it a lot as well but its french so had to take a point down sorry 💔

Thy - 5/10

I love them a lot as well BUT they main embalmer so i cant really trust them and had to take 5 points down 😔💔

Mitty - 1/10

Only gets one point because i dont want to put her in the same spot as Hiyori, a bastard as well

Tae - 10/10

My dearest of my dear friends 💞 love becoming the stepparent of random askblogs of them!! Also accepts my insanity 😇

Sam - 10/10

My other dearest friend love them a lot as well + accepts my insanity 💞 also supports me in my quest to look for my wives even if they are a bit insane and want to kill me

Orange - 8/10

LOVE ORANGE WITH ALL MY HEART BUT IM TAKING 2 POINTS OUT CAUSE ORANGE MAKES ME SUFFER!!!!! GRRRGRRRRRRR!

Kory - 3/10

Simps too much + thinks im too insane so i took points out 🙄/j

Klai - 8/10

Also a simp but i respect her so!!!!

Pins - 10/10

Love pins a lot, my dearest friend who draws very well mwah mwah

Beth - 10/10

Absolutely love Beth because she's a sweetheart (even if she likes aesop 🙄/j)

Yami - 10/10

Yami also sees me being insane sometimes and still accepts me so 😇😇 friend

Joe - 0/10

Doesn't let me kiss the cute vampire 💔

Emma - 10/10

Love Emma with all my heart!!!! Grrgrrrrrr!!!!!

Al - 10/10

LOVE THEM A LOT AS WELLL UEEEUEEEEEE I NEED TO GO BACK TO MY AKSBLOGS TO INTERACT WITH THEIRS BUT UNIVERSITY IS KILLING ME UEEEEE

Fifi - 10/10

We dont talk a lot but fifi is very nice so im putting them in here as well <3

Boris - 9/10

Fren :] love logan so much aueeueueueueueeueue

#if i forgot someone im sorry im #im very dumb and forgetfull and #IM ALSO SLEEPY AS HELL!!!!!!!! #anyways #🤡 rambles

[lutawolf]

Between Us Episode 3 Commentary and Review

Previous episode reviews can be found here.

We start the series with Team playing basketball. He misses. In the book, he is actually a very good basketball player.

Yup, you stink, Team. Bet we have Team second guessing if Win really meant they were in a relationship. Remember, the UWMA Team needs reassurances. Why? Well Win is perceived by many to be a fuck boy. Is anybody surprised? Bisexuals are often perceived this way. It will be interesting if that actually is being kept. Guess I'll have to continue watching to see.

This is what I mean by the dominant Team. He isn't really, but he does feel the need to puff up. He is concerned with being seen as weak.

Look at that pissy Win. I know a lot of people have made comments that they feel Win is different. Remember, you were only seeing snippets of Win with Team, whom he is soft with. Outside of Team, he is tough. These coconuts.

Too late! Win has already eaten him alive! The slow mo! Love it, but I love Win waiting on Team even more! Did that dead ass actually run. 🤣🤣🤣 Is there really a product placement for iqiyi! ☠️ Team, you are so brave when it isn't Win. These lovely bunch of coconuts.

New nickname is drama king, and I'm not talking about the actor. The nickname fits. Look at him freaking out, then raising his hand.

Oh, T-rex, you risk losing your head. Look at that stare from Win and also him going Dom Daddy. Telling his friend not to talk about his man like that again. 🤟 I mean, he used the guise of him being a member of the club, but that's for Team's sake. Dean is coming in with words of honesty and humor. T-rex, seriously, you are trying to dye. Poor Win, though.

Fucking coconuts 🥥 Pince don't ditch your education! Bee is gone 🤣🤣🤣 Is he even gonna wash his hand. Okay, Team, I'm pretty sure you know why Win is concerned about you and not Bee. He might not be your daddy, but he is your Daddy.

I am dead. The ABC gang is making fun of Team. Rightfully so cause he damn sure not as brave as he talked. Love how Win just bluntly asks Team if he was avoiding him. Guys! Win's sad face is killing me. I'm gutted. He doesn't want to wait for Team.

Staaaaap, don't hurt me like this. Okay, I can't judge alcohol therapy. I've been there and done that. Get ready to embarrass yourself. The coconut gang really wants to help Team. Poor Win.

Why did you have to call him out on calling him Hai. It's their version of Daddy. Don't ruin it for us! Hell to the fucking yeah! Flashback, baby! Yup! They making Win a perceived fuck boy.

These fucking drunk white crayons are singing the abc song. I'm so dead. You fuckers really went to attention and dropped your friend. Niiiice. You assholes left him with the person he was just talking about!!! You white crayons have better read the room and know the situation. Otherwise you deserve an ass kick.

There is no time like the present for a conversation. Oh, you lucky that finger didn't get bit. That's straight up disrespectful. Don't put a finger in my face unless you are ready to fight. Fuck! I love their openess. Win wants to know why he has to report. Win explains he worries. That's what Team wants to hear. That arm on the shoulder is a signal of a wall coming down. He is still guarded, but he is listening. Who is Win to Team to worry. Win wants to know what title would allow him to be protective over Team.

They were so close to kissing, but Team pulls back. It's alright cause Win is starting to put two and two together, and he knows Team is still interested in him.

Win putting the helmet on Team, so cute. Getting on a bike drunk, though, is a recipe for disaster. Kids, don't try this at home. Yeah, we were really lucky he didn't fall off with being this drunk. Go take a shower!?!? You want him to drown! You are a brat, Team.

Parasomnia is a bitch. It can be caused by sleep apnea. So imagine your body has fought sleep so long that it's just fucking wore out, right. Then exactly what you're afraid of happens, the nightmare, but your brain is past exhausted. It locks you into place so you can't wake up. It often does take someone else.

Sub trio! Swimming makes you so hungry. Team, don't tease your friend! Nah, it's cute. Continue!

Open house! Poor Team. This is gonna kill me. Poor tired, baby. Win buying his basket. He's so worried. Ha! Daddy, husband, wifey! Just call him special. Ha! He bought him healthy food too.

Dean, leave my baby alone. I can't handle it. ABC gang are pretty good friends. Come on, brat, you gotta talk. Ah, see, that step towards Team. He was going to cage, but Team talks before he has to.

Yessss!!!! Take him to your room. To sleep. Baby needs it. Move closer. We've done more than this. 🤣🤣🤣 That's it. He does puff up like a cat! The care, though! Team how can you not see it!

There you go. It's better not to wake them up but sooth instead. Help them to find comfort while sleeping. Which Team does. Instinctively seeking comfort. Aww, he completely wrapped himself around Win. Pay back!

He kicked him off the bed and called him a squid!! This fucking brat. Dead. Team lies. Here is this Dom that has put up with being ignored, run from, bad mouthed, and kicked, but the instant Team doesn't talk or lies he goes Dom. And goes straight to caging.

See that smile at Team gonna wear his shirt. Me too, Win, me too. Did Win really grab Team's pillow to cuddle and sleep with. Cuteness overload. 😍

How did you forget! 🤣🤣🤣 The love. Damn. That kiss was so damn cute. They are so damn cute.

Hope you guys enjoy! 💜💜💜

#between us the series #between us #between us kink #coconuts mafia #win x team #winteam

[velvetstreets]

Jack and reader smoking 🍃 and just vibing and shit while stuffing their face in food and just watching the shittiest movie they could find on Netflix or something do what else u want with it just randomly thought of this hope this is good for u

This is literally my fking DREAM u don’t understand bro 🥺🥺🥺🥺

———————————————————————

“Sprite?”

“Check.”

“Chips?”

“Got em.”

“Cookies?”

“Your favorite ones.” Jack smiled at you, waving the bag of cookies.

“Pizza.”

“Duh.” Jack gestured at the pizza box that was on the bed.

“Okay baby, lesssss do iiiiitttt.” You winked and shot finger guns at him. Jack laughed and sat up against the headboard next to you. You got up to open your window, luckily it was a windy day, meaning the smoke wouldn’t be a problem to clear.

You jumped back into the bed and reached over to your nightstand and picked up the joint you rolled earlier and your ash tray.

“Do you have a lighter?” You asked, turning back to Jack.

“Here, baby.” He reached into his pocket and pulled out a lighter you hadn’t seen before. You took it from him and inspected it. It was a personalized lighter, with a picture of the two of you stretched across each side.

“Oh my god, Jack-“ you laughed looking up at him, meeting his boyish smile.

“D’ya like it? It’s us!” He smiled. (a/n: 🧚‍♂️ anon :D)

“I love it, stink. This is so cute.” You chuckled, pulling him in for a kiss. He cradled your face with his hand, nipping at your lip before you pulled away. He let out a whine in complaint and you laughed at him.

“Later.” You winked.

You laid back and flicked the lighter on, pulling it to the end of your joint as you inhaled. You held the smoke in your lungs for a few seconds before inhaling. You repeated the action a few times before you felt a certain heaviness in your eyelids. You turned towards Jack who was looking at you in pure adoration.

“What?“

“You’re so cute baby. Your eyes get all low and red and you get this hazy smile on your face. I love it.” Jack said smiling you. You blushed and ashed the joint before passing it to him.

“Here.” You said.

“Thanks, beautiful.” He replied with a kiss to your cheek before grabbing the joint.

He put the filter to his lips and inhaled, holding in the smoke for a few seconds just as you did, before exhaling.

“Okay baby, what movie are we watching?” You asked him reaching for the remote and scrolling through Netflix.

Jack took a few puffs, telling you what sections to scroll through to see what was available.

“Oooh!” He stopped you

“That one.” He pointed at the movie entitled We’re the Millers (a/n: lmfaoooo this fking movie). You grinned and pressed play as you snuggled into Jack’s side. The two of you cuddled like that for a while, passing and feeding each other food and snacks and readjusting your position every so often.

“What do having boobs feel like?” He asked out of nowhere.

“Seriously, Jackman?” You turned to look at him with a “da fuck” look on your face.

“I wanna know!!” Jack defended himself laughing.

“I don’t know, they feel like boobs. They’re just apart of me. Mine are killing my back though, I won’t lie.” You told him.

“Yeah? Lemme help you with that mamas.” Jack said before placing his hands atop your clothed breasts and started to massage them.

“It’s my BACK that’s killing me, not my tits Jack.” You rolled your eyes at him and took his hands off you.

“Right I know, I just wanted to make sure both sides were equally massaged. Now cmon baby, lay on me.” He said clearing the bed before laying on his back with his arms stretched out, waiting for your embrace. You couldn’t help but smile at his stupid answer and laid on him, your head under his chin as you turned your face towards the movie.

Jack gave your forehead a kiss before he started massaging your back. He kneaded and rubbed your muscles and knots, causing a few soft moans to slip out.

“Fuck, Jack…” you groaned as he helped melt away a particular knot in your back. You felt his hard dick underneath you, and even though you thought it was so typical of Jack to get hard right now, your couldn’t help but also feel turned on. Your nipples were hard and pressed through the undershirt of Jack’s you were wearing against his chest.

“Hmm? Feel good baby?” Jack looked down at you with pink tinted hooded eyes and a smirk across his face.

“Yessss… keep doing that.” You moaned. You started grind your hips into his when he worked his way down your back and onto your hips. He knew how much tension you held in them and loved to massage it out.

“God that feels so good baby, why didn’t you do two careers? Rap and be a masseuse?” You asked him. You felt him laugh under you before answering.

“You want me massaging other women?” He asked slyly.

Your eyes flashed open as your realized the predicament.

“Nevermind, forget what I said, I was tryna pay you a compliment idiot.” You said closing your eyes and tapping his hands to signal for him to get back to what he was doing.

Jack laughed again and squeezed you in a hug and kissed your head and face.

“I know, I’m just kidding baby. You know you’re the only one I wanna touch. Especially like this.” He said before reaching under your cotton panties to slide his fingers against your slit from the back. You moaned, your fingernails digging into his shoulder. He slipped two fingers in and started to thrust in and out of you, the pads of his fingers rubbing up against your wall deliciously.

“Fuck, fuck just like that-“ you cried into his chest. Jack pulled on your hair with his other hand, making you pull your head up so he could kiss you messily. You moaned into his mouth as you rocked against him.

“So wet… fuck, I love you.“ he muttered against your neck as he mouthed at your skin.

“Fuck Jack, I’m so close.. please-“ you pleaded.

“Cum for me pretty girl.” Jack whispered in your ear and you clenched around his fingers as your let out a cry, biting his chest.

As you were regaining your breath, Jack slipped his fingers out of you and into his mouth.

“Mmm, always taste so good.” Jack hummed.

You were slumped against him and Jack could tell it was time for bed. He laid you on your back and gave you a kiss before getting up. You whined and Jack chuckled.

“M’just getting undressed sweetheart.” He said pulling his pants down and peeled the duvet back, removing any extra items on the bed to the table or the floor of your room. Jack turned off the lights and the tv and settled into bed with you.

You both laid there for a few minutes silently, enjoying each other’s presence, until you let out another whine.

“What’s wrong baby?“ Jack asked, rubbing your arm.

“Too hot.” You said before slipping your shorts and undershirt off, leaving you totally naked. You settled back into Jack’s chest before he felt you tug at his undershirt.

He opened one eye and looked at you, the both of you having adjusted to the dark now.

“Too hot.” You repeated, and took his undershirt off. Next were his briefs.

“Still too hot.” You whined, tugging his underwear down.

“Okay, okay baby.” Jack chuckled at you. You were both naked and you were finally satisfied with the lack of clothing you both had on.

Jack thought you were done until he felt you tussle and put a hand on his chest to help you get up from his grip.

“Y/N we literally have no clothes on, you can’t still be hot?” Jack asked you.

“Not hot anymore. Empty.” You whispered.

“Empty?” Jack asked with a light tone, knowing what you meant.

“Empty.” You nodded.

Jack smiled a soft smile at you and gestured for you to come back over. You smiled happily and straddled his hips and sank down on his cock. You let out a soft “ahh-“ in relief as he filled you. He always fit you so snugly it was bliss.

“Better now, baby?” Jack asked.

“Mmhmm. Love you.” You yawned against his chest.

Jack leaned down to kiss you before laying back and letting out a relaxed sigh.

“Love you too, stink.”

—————————————————————

Tag list: @hoodharlow @moody4world @watercolorskyy @lcandothisallday @harlowthot @triplexdoublex @thinkingaboutjharlow @bbyharlow @jackharlows-world @primadxna-girl @curlyhairclub @dessmxsworld @inluvwithladybug @babyharleezy @thysagclub

#jack harlow #jack harlow concepts #jack harlow imagine #jack harlow x reader #jack harlow x you #jack harlow blurb #jack harlow smut

[novankenn]

SAW : Episode Three : First Assignment (Into the Sh*t)

The briefing IV had given them was utter bullshit, or at least that was the consensus of three of the four member squad. The fourth, one Jaune Arc, thought it was a complete and utter clusterfuck. The dimensional gate had done its job, and transported them to the destination without any issues, aside from one.

They had appeared inside what looked like a massive insect hive. One that seemed to be empty...

... but it wasn't. The denizens inside were only resting, and upon the appearance of the interlopers, shit hit the fan, with vengeance. Led by the largest of the twisted beast, SAW faced a literal wall of slavering maws filled with glistening teeth.

Doom-Guy: *Grunt

Juliet: Music? You have Music?

Jaune: They are closing! Why are we talking about music!

Ash: (Pull starts his chainsaw) Come to daddy.

Juliet: Wait for me! Ally-Oop!

Jaune: Shit! Doom-Guy!

Doom-Guy: *Grunt

Jaune: Screw the music! They're going to get overwhelmed!

Doom-Guy: *Grunt

Jaune turned from Doom-Guy and watched as Ash and Juliet were slasher filming their way through the growing horde, but Jaune knew it couldn't last. He knew he had nowhere near the experience or skill that Ash and Juliet were showing, but he did have a way to even the playing field, as it were.

The flash of pink and white light flooded the expansive chamber, causing the whatever they were, to flinch, giving Ash and Juliet even more openings to cause gore to shower over them.

Ash: (Disembowelling a vampire) What the hell are YOU doing?

Juliet: (Beheading one, and then bisecting another) So CUTE!

Jaune: (Floating into the air) Powering up!

As the notes and words flooded and echoed about the massive room, everyone stopped, and took a look at Doom-Guy, who was just standing there bobbing his head to the beat, only for a second later...

Juliet: My Turn!

Jaune just paused, floating in the air, as Juliet and Doom-Guy ran ham on the gathered monsters. Ash tales a step back, and moves to stand just to the side of Jaune.

Ash: So...

Jaune: So...

Ash: Are you just going to stay floating, or are you going to maybe, kind of... sort of... kill something?

Jaune: I'm waiting for the best moment.

Ash: Sure.

Jaune: I don't see you in there!

Ash: Taking a breather. This King is getting a little old, you know. I don't, and I cringe to say this, have the staying power I used to.

Jaune said nothing, and just watched the carnage happen. It was a massacre, upon a bloodbath. Doom-Guy and Juliet were basically living blenders, rending anything not human that got close.

Jaune: They're good. You're good. I'm just better off...

Ash: Cut the bullshit, kid. You fly, I mean actually fly, or is it just levitation? Whatever, the point is, do what you can with what you have. Me, Doomy and Juliet have years of smacking around the undead, well me and Juliet. Doomy dealt more with demons.

Jaune: What's the point?

Ash: I don't think I have one, really. Just go fly past and lop some heads off.

Jaune sighed and then as if pushing off something solid, he shot forward his dress billowing out behind him, Mystetainn chambered for a swing....

The four were winded, and stinking to high heaven, after having been coated head to toe in blood, ichor, and various other bodily fluids. But the fight was over, and all of them except for Doom-Guy were sick of that song. Leave it to him to put it on repeat.

Jaune: I guess we're done, so how do we get back?

Juliet: I don't know. Do you Ashy Slashy?

Ash: Don’t use that name, please... and no I don't.

Doom-Guy: *Grunt

Jaune: You can, that's good to know, but we need to fix that.

Juliet: Why?

Jaune: In case we ever get separated. We should all be able to get hold of IV.

Ash: Good point.

Doom-Guy: *Grunt

Jaune: He said WHAT?

Ash: It will never end.

Juliet: I want a bath... did he say how many more?

Doom-Guy: *Grunt

Jaune: Okay, that could be manageable. Guess we need to find a place to rest up. Any suggestions?

Doom-Guy: *Grunt

Jaune: Okay, ten-mile walk for soft beds and hot baths! Yeah!

#Squad for Annihilating Walkers (SAW) #jaune arc #juliet starling #ash williams #doomguy #rwby #ash vs evil dead #doom #lollipop chainsaw #zombies #secret government organization #Priest - Vampires #mostly zombies #they slay zombies #but sometimes other things as well... #Youtube

[iavenjqasdf]

why do you like ero guro stuff? genuine question cause I’ve found myself liking it recently and idk why and I’m anxious about it

Idk lol ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

"Why did someone's personal meat computer that has trillions of variables going into it at all times for decades and counting end up in this particular state" is a question for, like, god or whatever, and idc what the answer is. So I'll just talk about a few of the variables that I noticed and find interesting I guess.

I remember always feeling A Strange Way about seeing violence as a little kid. 2 particular memories: seeing a preview for something on Russian TV where a dude with long blonde hair and a denim jacket was standing on top of a hill and got shot in the chest and fell into the sea all dramatic, and leafing through some kinda super bloody samurai comic/manga that someone had misplaced in the kids section of the public library. Then there were the edgy Newgrounds flash games and Happy Tree Friends and the very concept of seppuku...

I was always a super scaredy kid and would tend to get fixated on stuff like that and replay it in my head for hours at a time, in absence of external stimuli or reassurance. Stuck in the backseat on a long boring car trip, worried skullkid was hiding in the trunk and was gonna chainsaw through it any minute, unable to share my fears with my parents cause I should've been old enough to know I'd hear the saw motor running if death were actually that close by.

I guess with time, I found the best way to stop being so scared of it was to jack off to it, and in the post nut clarity, realizing that I hadn't died, or accidentally killed anyone else either, so maybe it wasn't the end of the world, and it got easier with time, as I kept testing that apocalyptic theory.

Another thought that helped: the Saw movies make hundreds of millions of dollars. Probably not something that could happen in a society where attraction towards gore was genuinely something you'd be widely shunned and exiled for, at least on that level. Bringing sex into it of course squicks out a lot of people, but that's true of everything, cause we're still so weird about sex generally.

But I saw unsimulated executions on liveleak before I watched any R rated movies. We had drills in elementary school to make sure we never forgot the possibility that a stranger would come in and shoot us to death someday, so we covered under our desks, until they told us it was time to feel safe again, and we could go back to our coloring books or whatever innocent little childlike things we did back then*.

I didn't get Formal Sex Ed till like, high school, but the kid who showed me Happy Tree Friends explained the basics of it to me on the playground back then, too. Stick the deadly weapon you were born fused to into someone else's holes until fluids came out. Same basic principle.

So I guess the cute tidy answer would be: I grew up in the American capitalist antisex death cult. How could I not end up a bit weird about the concepts of death and sex?

Explore what you like, nonnie. Never let anyone shame you for thinking or feeling anything. The only thing that Actually Matters is how you treat other people, and if you're not going out and hurting people without their consent, you're light years ahead of all the cops and soldiers and capitalists out there who are thoroughly convinced that they are Good People™ for doing what they do. Looking at images with a higher % of red pixels than average, or reading graphic descriptions of mutilation that don't have the characters turn to the camera mid-scene to say THIS IS NOT GOOD TO DO DON'T DO THIS IN REAL LIFE BY THE WAY, isn't some type of uniquely irreversible soulcorruption you need to rescue yourself from or whatever.

Let that rotten flesh-stinking flower in your mind bloom ❤️

*I never knew what to draw as a kid; my first ever drawings were imitations of Children's Drawings I'd seen on TV and whatever. Stick figures living in a box-and-triangle house unlike any I'd ever actually seen, never mind lived in, snowcapped purple mountains in the background when the only ones I knew were the very much unsnowed-upon, earth toned Hollywood Hills. I distinctly remember crumpling up and throwing away a drawing in 2nd grade because I didn't feel like my art was "marketable" enough.

I'm glad I'm able to express myself a bit more truly nowadays, at least in some regards. I guess I found my market :)

#larce track #📰 #guro #ero guro #📝

[m-jelly]

Oh! I have an idea! Can you make a levi x reader off the avatar movie since the trailer for the second one came out recently? Where reader is neytiri and Levi is Jake? Based off the plot of the movie? Please and thank you!

Hi anon, so I don't like the Avatar movie and I haven't seen the trailer for the new movie. I'll do something based on the aspect? Like a hidden culture or something and Levi finds them?

@kenkopanda-art

Connecting.

Pairing: Levi x Reader

Genre and tags: romance, falling in love, AU, fluff, cute, talk of powers? Learning cultures.

Concept: Levi gets sent into a sacred forest to persuade the people living within to leave or their home will be destroyed. While there, he falls for you, who is the closest the people have to a military leader. You show Levi your people's ways and he discovers that the damage being done to the forest is dangerous and your people are the only things stopping something old and evil from getting out.

Tag list: @ladycheesington @levisbrat25 @skittlelover69 @strawberrybunny123 @nyxiieluna @li-anne @galactict3a @notgoodforlife @demonsimp6

Levi climbed over a massive root and panted as sweat poured off his body. The forest was humid and close. He felt like he couldn't breathe. He had been walking for hours and was certain he was lost. His compass stopped working and was just spinning in circles, so now he was stuck with just instincts.

Levi cried out when his leg was yanked from under him. His whole body was raised up high and stopped near a thick branch. "Fuck!" He struggled, but something stopped him. He gasped as he saw you walk along the branch. His eyes dragged up your body and followed every curve. "Fuck..."

You crouched down to show Levi the white patterns on your skin, the green edges of your face and your pointed ears. "Why are you here?"

Levi gulped hard. "To talk."

You narrowed your eyes. "Many of you have come before to talk, but it did not end well. Why are you different?"

"Look, I lost, my compass is fucked and I'm thirsty as shit. I'm not going to do a thing to you. I would kill to have a fucking bath and get out of these stinking and dirty clothes."

You hummed a laugh. "I suppose I could help you. Are you armed?"

"Tch, no."

You smirked and made vines run all over Levi's body causing him to gasp and moan. "Oh look, you are armed."

Levi blushed. "Fine, I was."

You made the vines put him down before you let them carry you down. "You aren't too angry with me, are you?"

He ruffled his hair. "No."

You used your vines to collect his weapons before leading the way. "Come with me."

He huffed. "Sure." He kicked himself a little. He wasn't sure what was going on inside him, but he liked you. He liked you a lot and wanted to do better.

He walked behind you and eyed you in your midthigh shorts along with your t-shirt. He could see your people's symbol on your back, it was a large tree with a flower in the trunk. He smiled a little and looked at your shoulders to see markings that showed your rank, but he wasn't sure what rank you were in your people's military. He took you all in and admired you, he thought you were an incredible woman.

He lifted his head when he saw the trees breaking. His eyes widened in disbelief at what was inside the vast forest. In the clearing was a bustling community of people who were just as modernised as his people were. Homes were up in the trees with multiple floors and large windows to take in the views. A river ran through the middle of the town and at the end was a large and breathtaking waterfall.

Levi blushed at how wrong he had it all. He had been taught that your people were behind in the times, that you were savages and you didn't have the technology, but here you were communicating and using modern things with each other. He knew that they had it so wrong.

You turned to Levi. "What's your name?"

"Levi."

You gave yours. "I'm the commanding officer of the security force with have here."

He blushed. "Wow."

You hummed. "You surprised?"

He nodded. "I didn't think you had a military."

"We do, sort of. We're not like you humans, but close." You led him to a lift. "Come."

He stood next to you. "How do you power this place?"

You smiled. "The water. There's a lot of power behind running water." You looked up as the lift moved. "We also control the plants and they help us do things."

Levi admired your ears. "Tch, messed up."

You looked over at Levi. "What is?"

"How wrong we have you."

You smiled softly. "I can imagine we have you all wrong as well." You walked out of the lift and down a grand hall full of plants, trees and stain-glass windows. "I'm bringing you to the King. He'll want to know of your presence." You looked back at Levi. "Knowing him, he'll let you stay for a price."

"What kind of price?"

You smirked. "Who knows." You stepped into the main room to see your King talking to his assistant and moving through papers on his desk. You blushed when he tucked his long hair behind his ear. "My King?"

Levi clenched his jaw as the King looked over and smiled at you in a longing way. His locks were golden like sand on a pure beach. His eyes were a hypnotic blue that drew you in. He was lean with a broad chest and small waist. His eyebrows were dark causing you to be pulled into his charming long slender face.

The King walked around the table, his robes dragging on the floor as he went, he offered his hand to you and held your fingers. "Welcome back. I was worried."

You bowed your head a little. "You know me, I'm a strong one." You released his hand. "I found a human."

The King moved closer to Levi and towered over him, he was taller than you and Levi. "King Haldir, who are you?"

Levi offered his hand. "Levi."

Haldir shook Levi's hand. "Pleasure. I am sorry if my commander was rough with you."

"I'm alright. Her vines felt me up."

Haldir looked over at you and said your name sternly. "Did you feel this man up?"

You blushed. "I was checking for weapons." You flicked your wrist causing vines to place weapons down on the table. "Found some."

Haldir looked over Levi's weapons. "You may have these back."

"Are you serious?"

"Very." He smiled and handed Levi's guns and knives. "I believe he means us no harm. As for your living arrangments, I think you should stay with the commander."

You groaned. "Fine. Come on. I'll take you home."

Levi bowed to the king before following you. "I get the feeling you can't stand me."

You looked over at Levi. "You're wrong. When I look at you, you make me feel things that I'm not happy with feeling." You blushed a little. "Let's just get home and get some rest. You have a lot to learn about this place and knowing your people, you were sent here to tell us to leave. You won't win, so you might as well enjoy yourself while you're here."

"I will."

You smiled as you watched Levi helping your people. He carried heavy things, which impressed many because he didn't have powers. So, Levi relied on his natural strength to do things and it impressed you. He played with the kids as well and taught them a few things. The cutest was how fascinated the kids were with Levi's ears and the colour of his skin. Most children had never seen a human before.

You lightly touched your hair and looked in some water to check what you'd done. You had braided parts of your hair to try and impress Levi. You didn't know what it was about Levi, but you liked him and you wanted him to call you pretty. You noticed Levi was doing things to impress you as well. He would compliment you while blushing. He would tell you funny jokes too. So, you decided to show off a little.

You walked over to Levi. "Hey, come with me."

Levi stared at the bag on your back. "Uh."

"I'm not gonna hurt you. Just come."

He hummed and saw the pretty braids in your hair. He blushed a little knowing you'd done that to impress someone. "I like your hair."

Your cheeks burned. "Th-thank you."

"You're umm...tch, you're beautiful."

You smiled softly. "Thank you." You walked. "Come."

Levi followed you and internally kicked himself for not saying anything nicer. He wanted to tell you so many loving words, but he barely got a single thing out to you. He felt shitty and wanted to impress you. He wanted to shower you in love.

He bumped into your back and blushed. "Sorry."

You hummed a laugh. "You were in your own world, weren't you?"

"I was, sorry."

You took your bag off your back and waved to him. "Just through here."

Levi walked through the trees and bushes to see a small waterfall with a deep pool. "Wow. This is incredible."

You sat down and opened your bag. "I have a picnic for us."

Levi joined you and took some food and drink. "Thank you."

You sipped your drink as you watched Levi. "I have somewhere else to take you, but I thought we'd enjoy this moment."

He smiled. "Yeah." He ruffled his hair. "Are you seeing anyone?"

You choked on your food. "Sorry?"

He blushed. "I was just wondering. I'm spending so much time with you...surely the King wants you."

You blushed. "Oh, you think me and the King?" You hummed a laugh. "No, we're not. I'm single."

Levi smiled a little. "Good. I mean umm."

You leaned over to him, your lips close to his. "Would you like to not make me single?"

He blushed. "I would."

You kissed him delicately. "I did my hair for you. I admit that."

"I love it." He kissed you back making you blush. "Thank you for this."

You nuzzled the crook of his neck. "We should get going to the next place."

"Okay."

You packed up and walked with him hand-in-hand through the forest to a temple. "This is why we're here, my people."

Levi stared at the stone pillars with a story wrapping up them. He looked to the walls to see stone carvings of a monster-like man. "What is this place?"

You walked up to the grand doors and opened them to reveal a huge oak in the middle with flowers and vines. "This is where we keep the beast at bay." You turned to Levi. "If we were removed from the forest, this thing will get out and destroy countless lives. It's an ancient evil that my people have worked to keep locked up." You walked closer to him. "If your people destroy the forest, we lose power." You smiled and petted a vine before letting it wrap around your arm. "We work together and it lends us power. We need the forest to stay big or everyone is doomed."

Levi offered his hand and watched a vine slide into it. "I won't let that happen. I'll help you protect this forest."

"Thank you."

He pulled you close and kissed you. "I'll do everything I can."

You smiled. "I know you were. Also, you moved that plant."

Levi blushed. "Huh?"

"I didn't move it."

He looked at his hands. "Wait, but I'm not..."

You cupped the side of Levi's face. "The forest knows what you've been doing for us. It knows how hard you've been working. It knows you care, so now you can wield it."

#levi ackerman #levi #aot levi #snk levi #fanfic #aot fanfiction #levi fanfiction #levi x you #levi x y/n #aot x you #captain levi #levi fluff #levi x reader #levi ackerman x you #levi ackerman x reader #levi attack on titan #jelly fanfics

[cyberpunkplaylist]

Tell Him a Vengeful Ghost is Coming...

So this morning I'm feeling that my playthrough 2.0 of Cyberpunk 2077 is more than a bit bloodthirsty. I delete a lot of gangers on sight with this Feral StreetKid character I'm playing. 6th Streeters, Scavengers, Tyger Claws, Maelstrom. Anyone who shoots at me (OR MY CAR) first. I'll stalk em and quietly put a throwing knife into em. Then while looting their bodies, if they're still laying there twitching and only MOSTLY dead, they get a bullet to the head. And I feel a BIT bad about some of em. Occasionally, I'll feel like I'm crossing the line from videogame protagonist to virtual serial killer whose timing belt has snapped in a fairly significant way. I've happened on Scavengers just watching TV and having a barbeque on a grill. And I drill em anyway. I mean, Scavengers are organleggers and butchers, so I don't feel too bad about messing up their relaxing fun day. Especially after seeing their victims piled up by a dumpster in an alley nearby. But looking at a cute ganger girlie kinda twitching on the ground cos I wirelessly stared a short circuit daemon into their wetware? Yeah, I feel a twinge of guilt for a moment. Now that guilt's not as bad as Star Wars Galaxies 20 years ago when I was given a mission to go kill some lunatics outside of Corel City on Corellia. At first I'm like, "Hey, that's not a problem." I was a gunslinger. I tooled right out there with my blasters cos hey, that's just biz. But I get there and I stopped cold.

Those guys didn't seem like lunatics. They were just swimming in the river. Milling about on the riverside. And I couldn't do it. I abandoned that mission. Cos I'm not an asshole. I'd feel terrible about going down there and busting their shit for breathing on a nice day by the water. Arasaka corpos in Cyberpunk 2077 however… I went to a police bounty posting and found some Arasaka mercs and a work team by some dump site. They'd waxed a whole group of pinks and for whatever reasons Corpos have. I zeroed all of em but one. The guy who looked like the squad leader I didn't do immediately. But Arasaka did my partner and has caused me no end of grief in game in a pretty personal way. "Now… There's a reason I didn't kill you, chummer. If you live, I want you to tell them. Tell them I'm coming. All these dead gangers your people have no doubt been monitoring while I cut a path through the city? I pretty much kill them on sight. But that's just cos they're butchers and rapists, human traffickers and not averse to shooting at me. But that's just biz. I'm not some gonk vigilante. I'm a professional. It's not personal.

Arasaka and all your little soldiers though?

I'm pissed with you.

And you're all going to see the extent of that. See this dumpster here? All of your dead team-mates are in there. I put them in there after putting a bullet through each one's left eye. They'll be pretty ripe soon. So listen carefully. Remember this part. This concerns you.

While their corpses are voiding themselves all around you in the stinking dark, I want you to remember my message if they find you in time. If they care enough about your worthless replace-able life to come and find you. If their actuarial tables dictate that you're worth a recovery op. Remember this.

Tell Yorinobu Arasaka a vengeful ghost is coming. Tell him that nothing will save him from its wrath. And in whatever hell he might believe in, I will be his chiefest tormentor. Tell him that what I will do to him will make his strangling his father to death seem the sweetest of kindnesses. Tell him that.

And if you die in this dumpster choking on your own horrified vomit with my message on your lips, I'm sure he can have his techs rip this memory from your rotting brainware. Waste not, want not and all that.

Now…

In you go."

So like... I don't believe myself to be a violent or vengeful person. Each person in the world contains universes. And the thought of taking away all the days they've filled their lives with is horrific to me. (with some exceptions.) But sometimes, my imagination can be a frightful thing.

#Cyberpunk 2077 #Cyberpunk #CP2077 #videogames #gaming #violence #Writing

[chickensarentcheap]

She loses her balance as a small, gentle wave rocks the board beneath her feet; losing the grip on his hair and shrieking as she again topples backwards into the water. Already giggling when she breaches the surface; hands frantically pushing wet hair away from her face and out of her eyes. She’s never been more beautiful; the sound of her laugh, water glistening on her deeply tanned skin, and the sunburn on her cheeks and nose causing her freckles to become more pronounced. Possessing a ‘girl next door’ adorableness not expected of someone who has fought the battles she has; a youthful innocence that not even her nightmare of an ex could strip her of.

“I DO really stink!” She laughs as she swims towards him; treading water as she rests her forearms on the surfboard. “Like really badly!”

“Rome wasn’t built in a day.” Resting an elbow on the board, he reaches across with his free hand to smooth down her hair. “Took me a long time to learn. Even to get used to standing up for more than ten seconds.”

“Bullshit. I refuse to believe it. Everyone knows that Australians are born knowing to surf.”

“That’s a lie. We have to learn to surf. We’re only born knowing how to wrestle crocs and punch out sharks.”

“Speaking of sharks…” She glances down at her feet; bubble gum pink toe nails shimmering in the water.

“Shark spotters will see them before they get anywhere near you. And if something does go wrong and they do get that close? Don’t worry. I’ll choke a shark out for you.”

“My hero.” Leaning across the board, she pecks his lips. “My knight in shining armour. Or should I say ‘slightly tarnished armour’.”

“I like that a little better. But it’ll have to be a small shark. Not like a great white. Or a hammerhead. Or anything like that. Like a baby shark.”

Laughing, she scoops up a handful of water and tosses it into his face. “For someone so cute, you can be such a shit head.”

“You’ve called me that twice today. In the span of five minutes.”

“But I’ve thought about it a dozen or so times. Listen, you can play the big, bad mercenary card for everyone else, but not for me. I live with you. I share a bed with you. I know all your little quirks. How big of a softie you can be.”

“And you’ve already been sworn to secrecy. Because if any of that ever gets out…”

“I know…I know. You have a reputation to uphold. I will take your precious secret to the grave. Or wait sixty years and then leak the proof to everyone we know. You know, kinda like the files on who killed JFK. Anyone involved will be dead and no one can be held accountable. Or embarrassed.”

“I promise you that if things get out even then, I’m coming back and haunting your ass.”

“Oh please. The only reason you’re coming back to haunt is because you like it so much. It’s a nice ass. A great ass, even. You like looking at it and touching it. And doing things to it.”

“You’re lucky this water is as chilly as it is. ‘Cause talking about your ass like that…”

“Don’t worry. When we get back to the room, I’ll help you out with your shrinkage. Make it all better.”

“I’m going to hold you to that.”

“I hope you do.”

Kissing him once more, she giggles when he prevents her from pulling away; fingers tangling in her dark, wet tresses as he deepens and intensifies things. Until they’d met, she’d never been kissed like that; as if each one is better than the last and he can’t get enough of her. Whether it be those sleepy kisses first thing in the morning or the frenzied and hungry in the midst of passion, no two are ever the same and she never tires of them; the press of his body against her and the taste and the feel of his lips and the smell of his skin.

“You know, I was thinking…” Resting a forearm on the surfboard, she places her chin on top of it. “...it would be really nice. To be able to do stuff like this more often. It’s fun. Doing things like this with you.”

“I’m just glad to have someone to do this shit with. Not the same; doing it on your own.”

“I think you were a lot lonelier than you’ll actually admit to. Before I came along.”

“My life certainly was a lot more boring. And a lot quieter. Not to mention there was a lot less hair in my shower drain.”

She gives a derisive snort. “And people say romance is dead!”

“It’s been…nice. Having someone around. Seeing their stuff all over the place. Just knowing they’re there. I don’t know…” He loops hair behind one of her ears, then the other. “...you know I’m not good with this kind of stuff. Feelings. Words. Words about feelings.”

“Well I’m just happy you want to share things with me. You love to surf. What a better way to get to know each other more, right? Share the things we love. I wish I was better at it, but…”

“Stick with me kid. I’ll have you on your own two feet in no time. At least for a few seconds, anyway.”

“Who knows I could be a prodigy. Once I get used to it. I could be a regular Kathy Slater.”

Tyler frowns. “That’s Kelly Slater. And it’s a guy.”

“Than a female version of him! Once I get my balance, I could be a natural! I could be a pro!”

He stares at her pointedly.

“Okay…” Esme laughs. “... maybe not. But staying up for thirty seconds would be nice.”

“You’ll get there. Takes a while. Practice makes perfect.”

“I also don’t have any Australian in me. I bet there’s something in the blood. That makes you such a good surfer.”

“Baby. in the past six months, you’ve had plenty of Aussie in you.”

“You’re disgusting!”

******

@muchadoaboutcj @mrsmungus @munstysmind @tragiclyhip @youflickedtooharddamnit @secretaryunpaid @residentdormouse @asirensrage @thesirenrealm @themaradaniels @ninjasawakenedmystar @starryeyes2000 @muchadoaboutcj

#Tyler and Esme series #Lost and Found #back to writing angst

[silentxxsoul]

The ‘I’ve got nothing witty here the Red Sox suck and the only joy I have is this silly little gay firefighter show’

No lie the Red Sox stink so bad yall. Like 9 blown saves level of suck so I’m all in on bad-dude-Jonah and Hen-and-Chim-P.I.'s

I was gonna say something here about cute lil baby jonah but jfc that dude is drawing people getting beheaded as a kid. I feel like that's like, a classic sign of a kid who's gonna get stabby later in life

More Bobby and May content ♥ it's sad its for this, but I love them

But also, where is Harry? Like the whole fam minus him is there ??

Oh my god Hen you did not rummage through a dead woman's medicine cabinet at her fucking funeral

BUCK PLAYING WITH A DINO AND IT BEING WHILE TALKING TO EDDIE IS GIVING ME LIFE

(hella sad that it wasn't a Buck-Chris convo but I mean it's funny)

Buck serving looks at his husband Eddie

The fact that Eddie knows how many stars and how far the hotel is lmao

Wait, so no Buck-Chris content? Boo fox tomato tomato

Hen and Chim breaking into Bobby's office lmao no Chim can't be cool

Yall are terrible liars lmao Ravi and Lucy saw right through them

Ravi speaking truth, as he does

(its the same energy)

♥♥♥DIAZ FAMILY CONTENT DIAZ FAMILY CONTENT DIAZ FAMILY CONTENT DIAZ FAMILY CONTENT DIAZ FAMILY CONTENT♥♥♥

"What's wrong?" ... "Your mother." yalllllll lmao

Them getting excited that Abuela got to make the tamales lmao

I can feel the fucking tension in that room, good loooord

gimme more

Yes Hen, you are correct they escalate!

10/10 did no foresee them going to Taylor but ok

She's going to take their hunch and run wild with it, isn't shee?

"off the record" welp, I know what's going to spawn the moral conflict or whatever they called it

So Eddie is the oldest? Or at the very least the middle child, both track honestly

Eddie's been waiting his whole life for this and I for one am living for it

GO EDDIE GO

Oh shit, did not see that coming or playing out that way. Eddie reading him from the jump, but also look at our bby jumping into action without a thought

"off the record" my ASSSSSSSS

Buck you know she can't actually keep that promise, I mean we all know it

This really is going to come full circle from Dosed except this time there's no lawyers to stop her. Instead she's going to break a promise, break journalistic integrity, and put people in harms way all for the sake of "the truth".

I'm so fucking glad Eddie and his dad are airing his past and his childhood y'all don't even knowwwww

CHIMNEY NOOOOO I DIDN'T EVEN CONSIDER THAT OH SHIT PLS BE OUT WITH MADDIE AND JEE YUN

I PREPARED MYSELF BUT I DIDN'T REALLY PREPARE MYSELF HOLY CHRIST

I KNOW SHE LIVES CAUSE VOW RENEWAL BUT AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

I'm a freaking nervous wreck ohmigod Bryce Durfree is killing this creepy persona and ahhhhh

They're really going hard on this episode and I fucking love it

HOLY SHIT CHIMNEY WHAT?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

OH MY GOD

OH MY GOD

THE DIRECTING THE ACTING THE STORY LINE

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

I JUST REALIZED WE DONT KNOW THAT CHIMNEY IS AT THE VOW RENEWALS

I HONESTLY DON'T KNOW IF THEY'D UNALIVE HIM OR NOT BUT IM TERRIFIED

CHIMNEY'S HAND--THE HAND CHIM PLS KNOCK A BITCH OUT PLS

I'm not going to survive this episode holy fuck my life this is insane wtf is the crack fic shit I love it so much

like this isn't 911 at this point, right? This is just an acting exercise to let Kenny and Aisha shine bc they fucking knocked it out of the park omgggg

Honestly this episode can be summed up in two words: Holy Fuck

They're going to leave off with Taylor as a cliffy huh

Bobby ohmigod yessssss beat his ass! I fucking love protective Bobby

Uncle Buck moments getting overshadowed by Taylor is a hate crime

Chimney being sad seeing them reunite and I know he's wishing Maddie were there but I feel it in my bones she's gonna show up

(FOX IF SHE DOESN'T I WILL RIOT)

FUCK IT I'M RIOTING BITCHES

What do I have to do to get some Madney content around here?!!

Aisha and Kenny are killing me tonight

IDK how to function after this episode and I sure as shit don't know how I'll function after next week

#911 fox spoilers #911 fox #im gonna need jonah to revive me after this ep jfc #this is so intense and i love it

[coconutvanilladeodorant3]

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[idkwhyimhereignoreme]

"I will not give in"

"i'm back" sera said "Welcome home" max said "did you do as you were told?" sera said while giving him a look "and what if i didn't" he said, "stop being lazy and learn how to get up and do something around here boy" she said "boy??", what did i tell you about that watch you're mouth girl." he said in a mad tone, sera just shrugged it off "whatever don't do it again" she said "and what are you my mommy?" he said "no and i will never be" she said "well isnt that too bad" he said sarcastically frowning "take a shower you stink" she said "why are you complaining now i remember you used to give me head when i smelt like this" he said "you're delusional" she said "yea ok" sera then makes her way to the shower and washes herself "i needed this mmmm" she said as the warm water runs her body "need a little help" max said while behind her "HUH WHEN DID U GET IN HERE" sera said while blushing "oh??, this is the first time you ever blushed how cute" he said "shut up and get out" sera said in a monotone voice "no i wanna help you wash up" max said while smirking "s-stop" she said "hmmm cat got you're tongue" "no" "i thought you were all dommy mommy type what's happening now you're shaking" said max while sticking two fingers inside of her while pinching her nipples while sera moaning softly to his touch "you dont even deserve to cum due to your bratty attitude" max said "ill kill you" she said max then deepens his fingers inside of her "what was that sorry i couldn't understand you there" max said while smirking "

(a/n: the stuff the guy is saying is stuff ill say/jk)

WELP THATS ALL FOR TODAY SERA THEN CUMS CAUSE SHE A SUBMISSIVE BRAT BUT ALSO A DOMMY MOMMY WHEN SHE WANTS TO SO HOT 2 IN ONE????????????? oh DEAR

#dommymommy #submisive sissy #submisive

[wh-da-backup]

Lyric Dump posted sept 2010

bits of paper:

she walks like hell down the hallway, naked she wonders why they stare but doesn't care, she'd rather die than be repaired -----

he likes gore and she likes sugar they make the perfect dying team

I liked his words so I learned his side I like her words now I wanna learn her side

kiss me sugar breath breathe me candy death

the new Mr. Popular and his gangrene bride ---

the twisted phoenix of her mental ashes

you ask me why I feel so down, I finally tell you now look what I've done I've made both of us frown

but things are always better in our minds ---

you need her like a hole in your head watch out man it's a package deal

see the names she'll give you both yeah it's all in your head ----

I'd spend my evenings and stare at that shiny dumb failure of a child who never says a word and thinks she's a poet. how cute. ----

play their subtle obsession

lady love is out to get me

surgery under Anastasia ---

I don't care how you see it- these are my children

and I live for them and I comfort them I would kill for them I would die for them ----

love, could you be human oh could I? we're shiny silver trash machines

we've been programmed by airwaves

we've been programmed by wires spoken by liars

we've been designed, we've been designed is this alright? ----

they're lovers made of glass and lovers made of sound

catching a butterfly is not quite the same as catching a train --- Drive Me, Crazy

5th wheel's for you break the 4th wall and your bones and everything else

drive me, crazy, i wanna crash ---

i want my life back gonna have to take it ---

I was named after you but we're not the same I just can't take it just can't take the blame

the children are always afraid ---

she can have my blood I don't mind go infect the human race with mine

I'll scratch all night ----

gaping pores in teenage skin it's true i let a lot of stuff in ok ok ok

I'm fine I'm great I grin but it's true I keep my anger held in ok ok

and I fear it's a sin the state of mind that I'm in can I forgive my disaster created in turn I hope I won't have to burn in something clearer than blame like the face I've inflamed in the mirror ok --- Stupid Hair

I want you out of my face I want you lying on the floor instead I want you out of my life get away from me get off my head

I'd like to cut you up you're gonna die die die I wanna change you up dye dye dye ---

chosen one, I chose myself ---

can I borrow your self cause I don't like mine anytime anyplace anymore anyway

overreact like I do when you yell

I hang out with burners, maybe I'm one too we all got a price to pay ---

I need some brain bleach keep on thinking those razor blade thoughts ---

the man who likes to visit winter flashing lights and bubble eyes always draws his psychic lines ----

he lives his life in contempt for heaven

I have chosen to be undecided

once you've got it all figured out it's too late

setting fire to a world where nothing burns ---- Walking

coop us up all day we sweat and we stink

waiting for summer no cold to protect us from

at least we come in pairs sorrow to those who lose that friend

walk on me all day never hear your thanks hey man just set us free

just want to walk on the earth God made feel it on our soles ----

well I've got an identity and if you want to know then pay attention to the lyrics when i play these songs for you

well I've got a personality and if you'd like to know then pay attention to the lyrics when i play these songs for you

well I've got your reality and if you think you know then pay attention to the lyrics when i play a song for you ----

I think too much try to suppress it back I'm obsessed and ashamed and my confidence lacks ----

takes one to know one you are what you eat ----

a few hurtful words and we argued in bitter doesn't take much for a fire to start well she burned down the house and everything in it I told Heaven and Hell take good care of my guitars and write helpful critiques of my art ---

we'd stargaze at the empty ceiling ----

I'm thinking I'd like to be haunted tonight no need to thank me I'm frightened in return I'm thinking I'd like to be haunted tonight setting fire to a world where nothing burns. ---

that hour of your life that you gave repeatedly

you're my favorite plastic but you're not one bit of help

I know how I'm yours that my teeth absorb stains

I'm making up my list and so I guess I'll throw you in

reclining in a clean and quiet room ---

it's not damage it's this damn age we're living in blocked the flow of everything ---

and even if I had a gun I doubt I would shoot anyone I like /I'm fine

a fellow asked if i'm on drugs I don't need that to pull this off I'm fine

I've made myself disposable as a friend I've made myself unattractive so who am I to complain about it? my social capacity consists of a one-sided conversation between myself and a unanimous awkward silence (ding dong ding the witch is dead at 27) and so the universe gets its comeuppance ---- (cleverbot responses)

it's not funny your smile

so that's where his brain went

he was hard to read

I think you dislike cheese ---

facial constellations from scars I read the future in my stars I thought, I could be so pretty by pretending to be beautiful but I choose not to ---

It's been a few weeks since I've seen her as I've been away

wore a dress like an eyeris so blue like her eyes

she would blink to me in skies and I'd read them and sigh

I would read them and cry

painting stripes on my shirt

does it hurt to be from here

I do

in a car to be so far away far away

painting stripe on my shirt and I'm drowning in acidic paint I am blatantly lost to be so far away far away ---

stop touching your face

stain me with absence

turn the knives to forgiveness

peel myself from the floor ----

I'm not dirt

I get hurt

I don't bleed oil ---

another sunrise I'm already on my way nature's dying because now we start first

I'm sorry that I hit your head ---

we dug this grave to keep us alive for a little bit longer now hell seeps in through the walls along with the groundwater

wrote a letter home to you so a part of my can leave this place my love

breathing is bleeding nowhere to go but down breathing is bleeding nowhere to go but blind

together as parts of this great war machine but as souls we're alone ---

I wish this day had never been born wish i'd stabbed a knife in the womb of sunrise when I couldn't quite sleep from the dark in my eyes and now hours later the knife is meant for me

I don't wanna tell you you'll worry, you'll hurt I don't think I'm in danger and you'd think it's a joke a nauseating plea for attention you'd gag til you choke

nothing went down but a whole lot of staring i stared at the knives, the liquor, the pills, it all seemed so easy it all seemed so easy ----

songbook:

you're a wannabe wannabe and famous for that you know there's gotta be a catch catch catch hack don't look down on me just cause i'm a wreck you know there always gotta be a catch catch catch retch ---

girls in the schoolyard blabbing secrets they were told not to repeat by their parents ten years later walking around in the cold less cloth than skin they don't even have the dignity to be embarrassed

a girl died back in '93 and was buried are you really that gullible? paranoid about viruses you could be carrying are you that irresponsible? ---

mind. scent. way to pass your judgement interesting prop, hence why i'm still alive...

and you smell like chemicals you smell like chemicals you smell like chemicals ---

I never suffered teenage angst til now be careful what you wish for I never thought my heart would break be careful what you wish for I'm always eager for an eye be careful what you wish for I'm always dreaming half-deranged be careful what you wish for

sleep comes on four screeching wheels eyes are closed by dull iron lies sleep appears long-awaited ghost hello my friend where would you like to go? --- We Are

I think you lied to me before you left them lying on the floor there's now a key that locks the door built by the lies that tie the score they scar me more

and there's a way that we talk and there's a way that we breathe and there's a way that we are

you say that nobody will you say that nobody can just look outside where we are ---

there's a hole a mile wide it's in my soul it's in my pride from lies... rusted scalpels that they are

all that needles to is stitch frail threads on an open wound

you fill it all ----

drive me drive me i just want you to derive me round and round again until i am renowned state it state it just shut your mouth and stay sedated overrated don't overreact like they did

you're handling eyes now so set your pins and needles down (your sole important everything) ----

my arm laid out my gaze is wistful blood is gold i've got a bottomless wrist full what's it doing keeping me alive? we're such a waste together wish i could give it all away and that way i'd be good for something ---- Sharks

be careful when you find the one whose eyes could be your 2-inch ocean

look out look out look out seeing sharks

be the dagger of my eye ----

walk through the market avoiding the stares trying to plug up the hole in a china doll's chest

they threw us all in a prison cell we gathered our wax limbs and sat up the best we could

I on my side and you lying next to me our faces met close enough

we fell in love in a prison cell I'll lie here beside you and hold you until we die and our wax limbs will fall to the floor

holding you close only time will tell the others talk nervously don't say a word

our wax heads rolled off and I knew that the dream it had gone

[medicinemane]

Also once again, so much horror involves 20 something jackasses where they're rude and catty and like cheating on each other with each other or some dumb shit so that they can decide to smash someone else's head in with a rock while monsters are trying to kill them and that's so fucking boring to me

That's just annoying, now I can't even focus on the monsters even if they were cool (which they're probably not, the movie I'm thinking of the synopsis for when I actually saw a clip of the monsters I was just like "boo, this stinks")

Or like... what was that movie about people going and having to fire a nuke into the sun to keep it going? The first bit was kind of good, but when they went and found the crazy guy on the space station it just got boring because I already know what an asshole is, I've dealt with them. It's also not like the parts before that were horror, it was just kind of melancholy, but I liked that part

No no, I like my horror protagonists to be props if I'm blunt. I mean I'd rather like them than not, but then I'll be sad if they die, so really I just want a cardboard cutout with just enough personality to make them being eaten by a monster or whatever be interesting... Junji Ito level characters, you know? There's another place you get some good horror, even if a lot of his stuff more ends up being silly

Anyway, never annoy me with your horror characters. That's why I can't watch Blair Witch Project. Their in fighting annoyed me so much I couldn't be bothered to watch more than like 5 minutes, so I literally don't get why it's spooky cause I can't sit through their annoying personalities

It's good they got sent to the corner or whatever the fuck is going on in that movie, they all sucked

(Alternate but more acceptable problem, you made the monster too cute. Yeah she's an inhumanly tall lady but like... I'm not seeing the problem here. She doesn't even seem to be trying to kill me, I'd just go with her)