#So sorry it's taken me so long to post this thing!

[essektheylyss]

This was entirely tangential to this post from @utilitycaster which is why this is its own post, but the tags made me think about what feels most compelling about Liliana to me, and it's really because there's such an interesting approach to redemption in terms of the sunk cost fallacy to be had there.

There have been plenty of comparisons between Liliana and Essek, but I don't think they're really situations that can be compared. Essek had done one horrible thing (that was of relevence to the story; it is implied that he's taken other actions that he feels were wrong, but we don't know what those entail nor do the Nein care enough to ask, so per narrative convention, they do not matter for analysis) and was only still involved in it to the extent that he couldn't take it back, so to survive he had to continue covering his tracks. But he was also incentivized to otherwise act in alignment with the group that was not those on behalf of whom he had made terrible choices, because he was still living in the Dynasty, and as such wasn't actively perpetuating those actions beyond the cover up.

Liliana on the other hand is acting with the Vanguard and has been furthering if not personally committing atrocities on their behalf for a number of years, continuing to the present. Like Essek, she believes her involvement in the cause to be a difficult choice that was made for noble reasons, and now can't see a way out. But she is also relieved to be told to stay, though at the point that they discuss her leaving, she is alone and outside the immediate range of contact or oversight from the Vanguard. It seems reasonable that she could disappear with a decent headstart, and perhaps become untraceable quickly enough to be safe from anyone following. With this context, returning to the Vanguard with the intention of feeding information to the opposition feels like the riskier choice, but crucially it is the devil she knows.

I actually liken this more to Cassandra de Rolo than Essek. Cassandra was manipulated against her brother by the Briarwoods, but this was also spurred by having watched Percy seemingly leave her for dead. There are legitimate reasons why the Briarwoods, as the people who rescued her and then kept her alive for many years, are the easier option in which to place her trust. She knows what she's getting from that vantage point and how to handle it. She doesn't inherently have faith that someone she only knew as a young and helpless child, who ran from the hardships she's faced, would have the strength or willingness to do what she has found necessary for survival.

I think that Liliana's actions are more willful, not least because she was not a child nor in mortal peril when she joined the Vanguard, but she sees herself as having made difficult choices when only faced with difficult options, and I do think they have been difficult. She didn't want to leave her family; she doesn't want to hurt the young Ruidusborn under her care; she is probably genuinely sorry that innocent people were considered a necessary sacrifice for what she sees as the greater good. It is psychologically taxing to feel as though one is always picking between bad options, which is a significant contributing factor for why people buy into a sunk cost for so long. And over time, those hard decisions become easier, because you know what to expect from the outcome. Though Liliana is well aware that she might be killed for a misstep among the Vanguard, she already knows how to act to maintain their favor, but how she might be received on Exandria by those fighting the Vanguard, even with the Hells vouching for her, is anyone's guess.

This is a very real reason why people remain in cults and struggle to push back against this kind of conditioning: because the decision to leave feels more immediately perilous than the decision to stay. (On a certain level making these kinds of choices and actions habitual is a fundamental basis behind a lot of military conditioning.) And if you are acting in the interests of your own survival, but that survival comes at the cost of that of countless others who have not, in fact, made any threat or harm against you to begin with, then is the nature of your survival morally defensible?

This analysis isn't a question of whether Liliana will commit to her role as double agent and turn fully against the Vanguard, or even which one of these is a "better" story; this is about what the story might say if she doesn't. Yes, she might commit to a different path than the one she's on and make an effort to redeem herself, but it is also a perfectly coherent and interesting story if she doesn't.

#sometimes it really feels like people just. pick a character name out of a hat #and then decide that that character must get what the person feels they deserve regardless of the rest of the existing text #instead of like... considering the text for the story that has already been told and what it might still say from that vantage point #cr meta #liliana temult #essek thelyss #cassandra de rolo #critical role #anyway do not know admittedly how coherent this is but I gotta finish up my work day so I'm posting it. yolo

[blughxreader]

Hi no your world building idea on the financial implications/restrictions of the purge are making me chew through steel actually. Because sure it keeps getting higher and higher financially, but that means that people (who don't just succumb to illegal means) start to develop weird cultures around it.

Like people who decide young that they would rather just make themselves as likeable as possible in hopes of getting a yandere for themselves the same way some people hope to become house spouses. Obsessing over looking and behaving perfect to the point of not knowing who they actually are outside of performing this role 24/7 (because who knows when their potential meal ticket might be watching? Where they put cameras? You can never risk breaking character. You have to be the character and hope they never find out the truth)

Celebrities in interviews talking about how they wanted to be famous in part to have resources to find the best darling and then keep them. People trying to become a celebrity's darling just so they can try and network their own career.

People add keeping their darlings on the list of lottery winning fantasies. Talking about the way they'd decorate their rooms and the things they'd give for mental and emotional enrichment.

Purge sympathizers who argue its an honor for you to be chosen as a darling since it means an easy life for a year. Darlings being financially taken care of, sure, but dealing with people taking them even less seriously as individuals because of the ""privilege"" to the point that then asking for basic rights or ammendments becomes a war against them being framed as greedy or demanding. (They already financially support you, and now you're insisting that they let you outside too??? What's even the point of kidnapping you then?? So what if it's for medical and dental care, that just means people who aren't your yanderes touching you, examining you, not a chance).

I'm just having so many thoughts and it's your fault (affectionate)

FROTHING AT THE MOUTH

Incredible ideas. The culture around the Purge is so interesting.

Like imagine a Yandere who’s dreamed of having a Darling their whole life, only for a bigger and badder yandere to show up and kidnap them? Anyone can kill and be killed. Darling, Yandere, and Normal aren't permanent labels.

There would be Darling seminars, where people could learn how to catch the attention of a high-value yandere. Or Yandere seminars, on how to maintain passive income and keep the darling reliant on you once the captivity period ends.

And maybe early in post-Purge captivity, there are mandatory and voluntary workshops for Yans and Darlings to learn how to coexist together in accordance with the law.

I actually love your ideas. Lottery winning fantasies? Kids dreaming about their future Darlings instead of weddings?

It's easy to map out the laws in a world like this, but culture is so multi-faceted and intricate. I'm actually barking at some of these ideas

Sorry this took so long to respond to haha. Your ideas were so good that i had to think for a while about how to add to them.

#yandere #yandere purge #purge au #yandere purge au

[pearlparty]

Distraction

Note to self: never ask for a spot ever again.  Just die like a woman when you drop the bar. 

Pairing: Austin x Reader (no use of y/n)

Summary: Austin teases you at the gym and you get distracted from your workout.

Warnings: Language, innuendo, flirting, established relationship

Word Count: 2075 ish

Note: Breaking another impromptu indefinite hiatus to post lol. Based on this post/reblog to cure writer’s block. Lol I wrote this in like a day and a half and in an airport so take that for what you will. I just really like men sweating and grunting I’m sorry. Feedback is a writer’s life blood, so please tell me what sucks about this so I can improve!!

Austin had always gone to the gym with you. You’d go together, but usually stayed in your own lanes doing your own workouts, and then leave together.  The routine allowed some space to breathe and work individually—do things separately together. It happened organically for one reason: different desired routines. And that’s how it stayed for weeks, leaving each of you satisfied at the end of the hour and a half.

Today provided another reason for why separate workout routines proved more effective than working together. 

You’d walked in with the intention of setting a personal record on the squat rack.  You’d been working your way up for weeks.  Maybe you truly felt prepared to lift it, or perhaps it was the extra zing that the pre-workout put in your step, but either way you stepped up to the rack prepared to put your legs to the test.  The cute dark blue crop and legging combo probably gave you an extra boost, too. It did make your ass look good, after all, and that little “I’m sexy and I know it” boost worked like magic for motivation. 

Unfortunately, you didn’t see the way Austin’s eyes lingered a little too long when you put your jacket and bag into the locker. Maybe if you’d seen his eyes darken, you’d have caught onto his little game instead of being taken by surprise. 

Still, before you parted ways at the locker, you couldn’t help but admire the curves of his bare shoulders beneath his muscle tee. Such fond memories of those shoulders and the weights they occasionally carried: your niece when you went to the park weeks ago, the heavy cement bag for your parents’ backyard, your thighs—

You shook the thought from your head, and moved to the track to warm up. You’d moved closer to the weight section to do some warm up Bulgarian Split Squats when Austin called you over to his spot at one of the benches. 

“Babe,” he called out, “can I get a spot real quick?” The question fazed you a moment; he rarely asked for a spot, but you supposed that the empty gym deprived him of many other options. 

“Yeah,” you chirped as you rose from the mat. “Yeah, sure.” 

Austin positioned himself on the bench and prepped for his heavy set. You couldn't help but admire the way his muscles rippled beneath his skin, the determination etched on his face as he focused on the task at hand. The veins in his hands and forearms seemed to pulse as he gripped the bar, and a small part of you wished they were wrapped around your neck—

"Ready, babe?" His voice snapped you out of your reverie, and you quickly positioned herself at the end of the bench, ready to spot him. You cleared your throat. 

"Ready," you replied as you braced yourself for the weight that was about to come crashing down. He grinned but didn’t say anything. 

As Austin began his set, your eyes were drawn to the flex of his muscles, the strain evident in every movement. You couldn't tear your gaze away, mesmerized by the raw power and intensity he exuded with each repetition.

With each huff and grunt that escaped Austin’s lips, you felt a flush of heat rise to your cheeks. You tried to focus on the task at hand, on keeping him safe as he pushed himself to his limits, but you couldn't shake the feeling of arousal that pulsed through your veins.

As Austin finished his set and racked the bar, he flashed you a grin, his chest heaving with exertion. He rose from the bench breathing heavy, sweat dotting his brow. 

“Thank you, baby,” he murmured with a breath, voice low and husky as he gently pinched your chin between his thumb and knuckle. 

Your heart fluttered at the sight of him, mind filled with images of his sweaty body entwined in passion with yours. You swallowed hard, trying to push aside the thoughts that threatened to consume your mind you helped Austin re-rack the weights.

"Anytime," you replied, voice barely convincing nonchalance as you tried to quell the desire that burned within your chest—a desire slowly spreading throughout your extremities and to your lower belly. "Anytime." 

Walking back to your mat, your mind swirled with overwhelming amounts of filthy thoughts, and the reps got increasingly hard to count (which ended up being fine because working to failure is good for growth, but still). Those damn grunts? Every huff and breath of exertion? The small whimper that escaped his lips when he struggled momentarily to get the bar up on the last rep? All played on a continuous, horny loop in your head as you spent the next few minutes finishing the exercises before your squats. 

His damn blue muscle tee, his damn cap that couldn’t cover his pretty curls at the back of his head, his damn gray joggers, his damn water dripping down his chin as he chugged from his water bottle after a couple of sets on the lat pulldown machine that made his damn muscles flex and sweat collect on his damn collarbones. Damn him damn him damn him.  

A trip the the gym had supposed to clear your mind, not fill it with insufferable horny thoughts. How were you supposed to focus on the movements properly when he walked around looking like that?

And now you needed him to spot you during your squats. Lovely.

His gaze wandered to you in the mirror as he took another gulp of water. You waved him over.

He adjusted his earbuds and wiped his chin with the collar of his shirt as he approached you. “Hey, gorgeous. Need a spot?” Was his voice always so deep? I must be ovulating because this is not normal.  

“If you’re not busy? I wanna beat my record from a couple weeks ago,” you answered. 

“New PR, baby!” he whooped, clapping his hands together once to try to hype you up.  He likely mistook your distraction for nerves. Hell, you wished it was, not an aching need that pulled your attention away from your workout.

A nervous laugh left your chest, suddenly rather timid at the prospect of him being so close while you were trying to lift something seriously heavy.  You turned to face the mirror behind the rack—turn away from him directly but still see him behind you in the reflection.  Had you seriously never appreciated how he dwarfed you before?

Okay, enough, focus on the damn lift you horny simpleton, the sane part of your mind berated.  You pushed the thoughts aside and stepped under the bar.

“Ready?”  you tossed over your shoulder to him as he stood a few feet back.  

“You got this,” he affirmed.  You took a breath and lifted the bar off the rack and stepped back.  Austin put a close but reasonable distance between the two of you and looped his arms under yours, prepared to pull you back if you were to fall forward.  

Another breath, and then you went down.  Austin followed your movements and you let out a puff of air as you tried to push yourself back to the top.  

“C’mon, you got it,” he gently coaxed from behind you.  It wasn’t the typical motivating voice he used in the gym.  No, it was much softer, teetering on the edge of something—well, you weren’t sure you wanted to find out or you’d surely drop the bar and hurt both you and him.  If you hadn’t been balancing over 200lbs on your shoulders, you might have shot him a wide eyed look.  You came to the top of the position.  “Alright, that’s one.  Just seven more.”  His voice seemed to have some extra smoke in it today.  

A flush of warmth spread through your torso, tingling in your extremities that had no connection to the exertion of the second rep. His words lit a fire, spurring you on as you sank into the third. 

“Doin’ so good,” Austin murmured, his hot breath fanning down your neck. “Just like that.” 

Fuck off fuck off fuck off you hot bastard. He was doing it on purpose. Whether it was to get a rise out of you or provide some extra motivation, you didn’t know.

Down.  Up. Four. Focus. Five.

“You’re killing it. Just focus on that form.” You could have sworn his hand brushed the side of your waist. 

Six. A breath. Seven. The burn in your quads nearly made you question whether you could do another rep. You hissed out a sharp breath and braced yourself, legs wavering at the top of the rep for only a second. 

“Nearly there,” Austin continued, the same salacious insinuation lining his words. “Can ya gimme one more, baby?” 

A thrill shot down your spine, and your breath caught in your throat.  Damn him.

You finished the set, legs trembling slightly as you stepped back to re-rack the bar with a huff. You set your hands on your hips to suck in a well deserved breath. A stupid smile graced your lips as you realized that you’d accomplished your goal despite Austin’s distracting encouragement.  The burn in your legs slowly turned to a sweet jelly-like sensation. 

Austin approached the rack, going around to meet you toward the front, a smirk lining his perfect lips. “Feeling good?”

You nearly rolled your eyes at his double-entendre. “Yeah,” you snorted, as you stepped around to meet him. “Feelin’ grea—“ You stumbled, the jelly in your legs making your knees fold momentarily. 

Right into his strong arms. 

“Woah, now,” he chuckled, pulling you back up with his hands firmly on your back and ribs. “Careful there, Bambi.” That time, you did roll your eyes with a laugh as you steadied yourself once more, but not pulling away from him yet. “Don't hurt yourself.” 

“Oh please,” you flicked the brim of his hat, “I’m canceling my membership; you are too damn distracting.” You giggled as you pushed him away to walk to the equipment spray, throwing a little extra sway in your hips as you strutted away. The jig was up; no sense in trying to focus on something when it would all be for naught. You wanted to play this out. 

“Is that right?” He cocked an eyebrow, that permanent smirk etched onto his face. “So you didn’t like my extra motivation, hm?” He gripped the brim of his cap and flipped it around, giving you a more than adequate view of his triceps and biceps as he pressed it down in the back. You sucked in a breath. He knew how much you liked it when he put his hat on backwards.

“I blame the endorphins. I’m taking my business elsewhere so I can actually focus,” you quipped. You stepped to the rack, deliberately putting it between you and him as you sprayed down the bar.

“Hm. That’s fair, I guess.” He moved in closer, placing his hands on either side of the rack and leaning over the bar, his voice low and suggestive, “Guess we’ll just have to find other ways to work out together then.”

You cocked an eyebrow, allowing yourself a moment to shamelessly look him up and down as the tip of your tongue wet your bottom lip before you pulled it between your teeth. Your delicate fingers curled around the bar as you rested your chin on it. The smell of his sweat mixed with his cologne and nearly made your knees weak again. You tapped your right toe behind your left heel, enjoying his proximity and the innuendo in the air.

You hummed as the tension crackled between the two of you. “Whatayasay we cut this strength session short and go home for some cardio?”

His eyebrows raised and he chewed the inside of his cheek, glancing dangerously down to your lips. A low hum resonated in his chest. “I like the sound of that.” 

He shortened the distance between you, tantalizing movements to tempt you closer to his lips. And then, “Meet ya by the treadmills, baby,” he teased with a wink and then pulled away. 

—

And that’s how you figured out that if you worked out with Austin, you’d end up horny and skip the workout for another sweaty activity.

tag: @mrsniallhoran505

#austin butler #austin butler fanfiction #austin butler x reader #austin butler imagine #elvis 2022 #elvis presley #masters of the air #elvis film #mota #gale cleven #Austin x reader #austinbutler #austin fic #austin butler fic #austin butler x you #bikeriders #dune part 2 #Is it wrong to tag movies he’s in even if this isn’t about those? Lol #Idc he’s hot #I’ve fallen into the gym guy rabbit hole and I’m making it everyone’s problem

[drdemonprince]

Any chance you'd expand on the hank hill trans guy post? (Sorry, best indicator I could come up with.) The concept interests me as I decidedly know my maleness, yet don't feel impeded by for the most part, any male gendered norms/boxes. I am fairly masculine, though I rarely use those kinds terms to describe myself. I have found I often do stray outside of what society pushed for me when I transitioned, yet I again do not feel it has taken from my right to maleness whatsoever. I am just me, who happens to be male. I have had friends try and suggest I am NB adjacent but I do not feel this way whatsoever. I feel more people are outliers to gender expectation than we care to admit and it's disappointing the way cis-people deny that. Hope this wasn't too long winded, I value your writing and perspective, and wanted to hear more of your thoughts on this.

Yeah, well so many things all get conflated by gender labels, and it's all so personal, you know? Masculinity does not have to mean maleness, and a person's gender identity might be a reflection of some innate quality they experience themselves as having, or a general summary of their tendencies, or their desired presentation, or their sense of affinity with other people, or an interpersonal tool, or something they just go along with because it was given to them by society, or any other number of things.

I think my recent substack piece on detransition goes into this pretty well, and I have an upcoming piece of what @pastimperfection calls "bilateral dysphoria" that comes out next week that delves into it too.

I think I mostly saw taking on a male identity as a means to an end more than any kind of innate reflection of who I was, though I did feel an affinity with effeminate men for a lot of reasons. I think I also discounted how much I have in common with my fellow nonbinary people of all stripes, because that identity became so strongly associated with being an annoying type of queer person that everybody else just wrote off as ultimately being their assigned gender at birth anyway no matter how much they protested. it doesn't help that 'nonbinary' is a catchall term for literally thousands if not millions of very distinct experiences and desires.

transitioning gave me control over how i was perceived, finally, but hormones are a throttle that only go in one very specific direction, and you don't really have all that much control over which changes kick in at which times and what people will make of you once you do start registering to them as some identity other than what you were first saddled with. it's an incredible gift to be able to toggle that throttle. but it's limited, not because medical transition isn't incredible and needed for so many, but because there is no escaping the goddamned binary cissexist logic that influences everything about how people treat you, how you navigate institutions, who finds you desirable and what they want out of you, and so much else.

if you're able to cast a lot of the external societal bullshit aside and feel strong in your maleness, maybe you're stronger than me or maybe our orientation to these things is just different, i don't know. i was never all that sensitive to feedback that i was doing the whole being-a-woman-thing all that wrong. i reveled in violating those rules to an extent. succeeding at being a woman despite my best attempts was what felt super dysphoric. and now i guess im succeeding at being a man, insofar as im always read as one, and it feels just as uncomfortable and objectifying and false. i thought that with manhood i could probably just grit my teeth and deal with it, but i'm finding that i can't.

ive always been very open that for me, gender is a thing I Do, and i guess to those who know me well it wouldnt be surprising to hear that i have gotten tired of Doing Being a Man and dont feel like playing that particular gendered game anymore. I tend to get bored of things! and find the flaws in things. and find my comfort in being fault-finding and contrarian and not being a joiner. and thats okay. i learned a lot along the way. not having to try any more is a huge relief. i can just do whatever. and know actively that people will more often than not be wrong in what they make of me.

maybe it was natural feeling for you to decidely 'know' your maleness without a care for masculine standards because that is the right identity for you! and maybe i only feel secure in the "not knowing" realm and in letting go of what people think of me or finding any kind of tidy categorization for it because that's the right spot for me. for now. until i find a new interesting way to be unhappy and striving for more and different again. :) that's just part of being alive, for me.

[wigglebox]

Found you ☀️

#spnfanart #destiel #destiel fanart #dean winchester #castiel #wiggleart #rolls up 1000 days later with an empty rescue #I’ve always had this scenario in mind but I never knew how I wanted to draw it and actually it was gonna be quite sad at first #with Cas being taken away by the empty #but the other night I wanted to draw him getting rescued lol #so I’m like I must do this inbetween my other projects #also #the final image is of them being back in the room they were in 1518 #because to me I don’t want their first kiss to be in the empty #but back home #sorry for the long post lol #I have to figure out how to get this thing on Twitter

[okkennymay]

Not really an ask at all, but I just wanted to say that I love how your little chicken sona looks like a feathery sausage.

And, of course, to say that I love every single bit of art you do and impatiently await the next comic page so I can thirst some more over this wet cat of a man. Hehehe~

Thank you anon 💖 My little 'Kens are very dear to me, they are in a way me after all, to see affection for them and their odd form makes me as happy as can be~

You are just an absolute sweet pea! 💖 I hope I don't keep you waiting too long for the next page, but just in case, let me quickly indulge you in some wet cat of a man right now UvO

#okkennymay #Vlad Masters #Danny Phantom #'kens #'ken #askkenny #anon ask #I'm so happy to finally be answering some of these asks <3 #I'm sorry it's taken me so long #I'm embarrassed to admit to being scared to interact with anyone because my body/poor health punishes me for it almost every single time #Same thing when I post anything it's utterly maddening but I ain't never gonna stop throwing myself at the wall created from my fear #I GOT DREAMS AND AMBITIONS BODY COME ON WORK WITH ME HERE ;C;

[lorephobic]

2, 17, 22 for Saltburn

2. a compelling argument for why your fave would never top or bottom

this means nothing to anybody who follows me for saltburn, but i just answered this question about my other blorbo and came to the exact same conclusion for the complete opposite reason. oliver quick would NEVER top because he is clawing to be the main character of every room that he enters. he wants to be desired so badly that he'll reinvent himself into whoever he thinks you want.

there's a sort of trope in obsession-related media where the obsessor ends up forcefully taking from their victim exactly what they want. and i think that oliver subverts this narrative by never taking anything from felix. he never asks for more than he's given. when he finally has the opportunity to kiss felix, he doesn't. he takes from venetia, and he takes from farleigh, and he takes from james and elspeth, but at the crux of his character, is his need to be taken by felix. this is, of course, a metaphor for bottoming LMAO

17. there should be more of this type of fic/art

ok so tbh i'm not a huge fic person because i'm so incredibly picky about the way that the media that i care about is interpreted, which is why i've never read a single saltburn fic and honestly i probably won't ever, just because i feel like there is very little room in this story to expand and no way to twist and rewrite it in a way that is true to the characters that i care so much about. but WITH THAT BEING SAID, i was honestly so totally astonished by @125hr's cattonquick art that it made me realize that maybe i do want to see more beautiful art of them kissing and we can all pretend like they had their moment<333

22. your favorite part of canon that everyone else ignores

this should honestly be it's own post, but since my last rewatch i've been thinking a ton about the final dance being a reflection of felix's initial tour through saltburn, which has been talked about! but what i haven't seen talked about is all of the other scenes that end up echoing each other. felix's life on the screen and oliver's role in it form a perfect mirror image, starting and ending with oliver staring at felix at parties and not being able to touch him. starting and ending with oliver watching felix have sex with someone that's not him. starting and ending with oliver fucking people who aren't felix in an attempt to get closer to him. on a second rewatch, when you know all of the signs, there's such a devastating sense of oliver returning back to square one, lost in a crowd full of felix's friends and nobody even knows his name. there is a time before felix and there is a time after felix and exactly at the center of this timeline, there is a man on his hands and knees in a bathtub getting the closest he will ever get to the thing that he wants.

#saltburn posting #asks #worried that with 2 im drawing a false relationship between bottoming and being desired and being taken #which is rapidly leading me down the linguistic rabbit hole of what it means to be fucked #and how that word holds a negative connotation that is so deeply ingrained into the way that we speak and think #to be fucked is a bad thing. it is an insult to say fuck you. #and of course all of this has its roots in misogyny #but i think it's worth mentioning that it is probably slightly problematic to conflate one on the receiving end of sex #with one who is being taken from #which in isolation already sounds extremely puritanical and is not at all what im going for here LMAO #anyway SORRY these r so long #they should honestly all be their own posts because i have so much to say all of the time #but these were SO fun to spend some time thinking about so thank u for sending them<3

[crybaby-bkg]

Bakugou loves it when you wear colored lipstick. He likes when you wear makeup in general, if it means he can sit there and watch you during the whole process. But his favorite is when you put anything colorful on your lips—stick, gloss, liner. Anything that makes it an unnatural color, something that makes your pretty mouth pop and vibrant.

In those instances, he’s practically insatiable when it comes to kissing you. He’ll watch you apply some bright purple on your lips in the mirror before some big event, and immediately is ducking his head down to sneak a kiss. He doesn’t like taking pictures much, but he’s gladly taking mirror selfies with the neck of his shirt pulled down to show the possessive lipstick stains you’ve left on him. He ignores your whining and protests when he practically manhandles you to kiss off your lipstick because, goddamnit Katsuki, you ombré’d this lip and it took really long and it looks too good for him to keep kissing it off!

You thought that maybe he would hate the lipstick transfer, but if anything, he begs for it. Wants a kiss on the lips when you’re wearing red, a kiss on the neck when you’re wearing pink, a kiss on the collarbone if it’s black, and maybe even a kiss a little lower if you don’t mind messing up your makeup.

He’s polite enough to wait until you’re about to wash it all off to ask if you could reapply the color on your lips. You didn’t understand why at first, not until he’s kissing at you feverishly and pulling away scraps of clothing until you’re both laying there naked, him covered in colored lipstick stains and you in love bruises.

And does he have the most orgasmic nut of his life when you pull back to kiss at his leaking tip and he catches sight of your stained gloss around his base and on his pubes? Definitely. And does he ask you to do it again the next time you put on makeup? Definitely, again.

#this is an apology for the last thing I wrote LOL #I cant hurt you guys anymore sorry #but I was thinking about this the other day when I did my makeup #I don’t wear lipstick and colored gloss as much as I used to bc of the pandemic #and like always wearing masks n stuff #but I wasn’t going anywhere so I was like #fuck it let’s have a BRIGHT and dark lip for once #and immediately I was like #okay he would break his neck to kiss it off bc he’s an ass like that #omg and also the image of him only having a few pics on his social #media #wtf I didn’t mean to press enter on those last tags ajdhdjdj #ANYWAY #him posting that pic of your kisses on his neck and using that as his pfp for so long #UGHHHHG his pr team would be so mad bc it’s SO unprofessional but he needs mfs to know he is TAKEN and in LUV #YOU HEAR ME?! #okay bye lmfao #—new treat in the streets! 🍫 #bakugou treats! 🍬

[jinxybri]

so... i've been having thoughts about Forgotten Stars again.

i re-read forgotten stars a lot. i re-read all of my writings but especially forgotten….

there are a few chapters in forgotten that mean so much to me, that i managed to write out so brilliantly (at least to my standards) that portray what i wanted them to.

this'll have spoilers for the current version of forgotten stars so be wary. (note: i will rewrite forgotten stars at some point. that point is not today. not yet :] )

chapter 7 when Ocie finally finds out about Rae not remembering himself or his friends. how she breaks down, how the weather outside the library also breaks with her and how she fears what she is feeling because she doesn't know the extent of her powers.

chapter 9 where Athena tells Icarus about Rae and especially how they open up about how much it hurts them that the uncle they know is gone and how they dont know how to fix it

chapter 11 is definitely my top 3 with how i wrote how Rae himself is struggling with himself. how things feel familiar and yet he doesnt know why. how he sees how much effort Athena is putting into all this and yet… he can't help. and then he goes to the portal and there is nothing. and then he panics and runs and runs until he no longer breathes and crashes. how he feels utterly useless cause he can't help someone he knows he cares about and yet the feelings feel false because he doesn't know why he has them.

chapter 12 is a goodie too cause it shows Caspian, struggling with everything - with feeling lost, with Rae, with Momboo.

chapter 14 is an another top 3 for me and it has my favourite beginning… which is just Soup. how I managed to write about Rae's inner thoughts and how everything felt like home and yet… at the same time it felt like the furthest thing from it. how talking with Caspian felt so familiar, how laying in that bed and sitting on that couch he felt at home and yet… he couldn't justify staying.

chapter 15 perfectly shows Athena's inner thoughts with how things arent progressing enough or fast enough for them and how they struggle with that. and then Rae's pov of him choosing to fight for her, choosing to stay and focus on Athena and Ocie instead of chasing after the feelings of home elsewhere

and then finally chapter 19. one of my favourite chapters. where Athena finally hits a boiling point and his powers activate and he has no control over them. how she scares both of his uncles and surprises the god of creation and then finds solace in how Rae cares for them. how they choose to fight for him, too.

guys if you cant tell, forgotten stars means so much more to me than just a fable fic. in its core, yes, its a fanfic and yes its about premade characters but i've put so much into it. i continue to pour my thoughts into it despite not having worked on it for months now. how i keep thinking of how to better guide the story and how many more ideas i have.

#plesae just be patient with me #i promise itll be worth it #ill probably start working on forgotten stars after i finish this one shot and get further into tangled au #gods i need to work on the tangled au again #i truly hope that by the time i manage to post my things there's still going to be people excited about them #i am truly sorry things have taken me so long #life has simply thrown so many obstacles at me #i am doing my best i promise #for now yall get small analyses on tumblr and wips on the discord whenever i work on things #forgotten stars #bee's writing tag #fable smp #fablesmp #icarus morningstar #rae morningstar #fablesmpblr

[m0e-ru]

tohruest adachiest manager's choice experience as compiled by the tumblr branch moel gas station 2023

helloooo my dearest okyakusan my most wonderful customers whether you have a membership card or just passing by. Here is the manager's choice of how to have the most tohru adachi experience ever 📣📣📣

this post will have a breakdown of the whole diagram with highlights, and my own opinions of each medium stated. Otherwise, here's a summary as a list!!

YES!!

Persona 4 (PS2 2008)

Standalone Drama CD Vol. 3 (scattered cameos)

Manga Adaptation (Sogabe)

adachi jumpscare table

Vol. 10; Chapter 54

Vol. 12

Arena Ultimax; Episode Adachi

Arena Ultimax Manga Adaptation (Rokuro Saito special mention!??)

this is a bit cool too

The Golden Animation

Blu-ray/DVD Vol. 2; Bonus Drama CD: A Sense of Gratitude

Blu-ray/DVD Vol. 4; Bonus Drama CD: Boo ~ I bear a grudge on you ~

The Animation

Standalone Drama CD Vol. 2: You'll understand when you get older

The Golden (PS VITA 2013) (Social Link, new events, etc.)

um

The Golden Animation

Episode 6: See? I told you Yu.

Episode 7: It’s cliché, so what?

Unaired Bonus Episode “Another End Episode”: Thank you Mr. Accomplice

other opinions 

I’ll be linking all available online resources for everything I’ve stated!! If a link is broken or the media is inaccessible, hit me up!! I have my own personal archive.

YES!! segment !! wahoo !!!!! this is where i constantly stuff my nose in whenever i want a good reference on adachis character. AND THEY'RE ALL PERFECT TO ME!! <- about the media

Persona 4 (PS2 2008)

Back to basics everybody!!! Let’s remember who this goofball is from the start. Forget he has a social link and see him be the bumbling fool for plot exposition and the real murderer !!!! Just like how I tell you not to reference the attendant during 3/20, we can put Shadow Adachi’s mannerisms and his influence under literal god aside and try and focus on what that means as symbolism and extra information on Adachi himself!!

Standalone Drama CD Vol. 3

THIS IS A FUN ONE he has scattered cameos throughout the drama and was essentially being dragged around by Dojima.

Basic premise of this volume that it’s sports festival season!! Yasogami’s at it and the IT are participating, as well as Nanako—although she worries that her dad won’t even come to see her and that she wouldn’t even be able to do the family three-legged race.

Adachi’s appearances here are so stupid, he says he was an “elite” then flops trying to help high-schoolers with homework because Naoto’s there. He does his usual begging and whining with Dojima etc etc he also drove Dojima to compete with Nanako after saying the man finished all his reports as fast as possible.

I like this one because it reinforces who Adachi is based mostly from the main game. With the context that fans listening are aware he’s the culprit (or not), they do sprinkle in his “emptiness” (<- no i'm exaggerating it sorry) and bring it to the front of the picture a bit.

Translated Transcript: https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/14uOTyzic9Ij9DjN4ZRNBLFTcGe0UF-PvX4qMnqcs2Fk/edit#gid=283104639

Available video link: https://youtu.be/p3yDNbczEqg?t=228 (timestamped to 3:49)

Manga Adaptation (Sogabe)

SOUJI SETA TRUTHER COMING IN STRONG also i just adore Sogabe’s adaptation on the game as a whole. While I am Marie lover#1, this manga did begin in 2008, and I like to think it’s the hypothetical that Marie really was expunged completely OKAY WHERE WAS I

As mentioned, this whole adaptation focuses on the game before Golden was ever a thing. No scooters, no extra events, no nothing. Although, Sogabe did write in a bit of Adachi’s Social Link in a context best suited for Souji.

I like Sogabe's take on Adachi in the manner of how he draws him and writes him as a character. It's not as whimsical or lazy like the anime, and the way he took the downhill spiral of the Hospital arc, from November to December, just actually felt like my emotions were ready in the right places. Surprisingly, in every adaptation, I was really enamored to see how Adachi acted differently in each one.

In the manga, he didn't seem as slack jawed as he did in the game at least. He looked like he was trying so hard to act concerned when he he actually feels guilty for everything going down !!! OR MAYBE NOT !!!!!!!

compared to the game, you can really how much he exudes of being so. plastic. ung kaplastikan. and you're mad not because you're stuck with ps2 limitations of three polygons of an arm waving around, but you're mad that he reeks of faking concern. But also unlike the game, you don't understand what's going on anymore because of the things that have transpired in relation to Adachi's character. Which is Sogabe's adaptation of his Social Link with Souji through having dinner with each other.

and Souji doesn’t know him! They share things with one another that one dinner but otherwise, Adachi’s never rambled on about himself as much as he does in a normal Social Link run. There is a different sort of motive with Souji and he wants to some things wrap things up while everything else is falling apart around him. If there’s a chance to help someone, even if he’s only talked thoroughly once or twice and that the other party’s opened up a single time to him, he’s the boy who wants to get through to people either way. What if Souji’s a bit selfish himself and wants to be in control of things when everything in his life and vision are literally blurring as he breathes? (takes place in november when nanako's hospitalized btw)

I love the lack of intimacy between the two, contrary to what majority of the fan base wants or even BELIEVES. Souji is a kid with a year in Inaba, of course he does a million other things with his time than hang out with an adult that’s some kind of darker version of himself and a representation of a possible bleaker future considering how similar they are. 

As for the specific chapters, I think it’s fulfilling to go through the whole manga from the start. Like, forget everything you know about P4 for a second and experience it as fresh as possible. Then you get to Chapter 54 to see Adachi’s condensed Social Link and get to Volume 12 to see things come together. Sure, I start getting a bit iffy with Volume 13 but I enjoy the parallels between the two, genuinely.

i have more stuff locked and loaded but uhmmm yeah 👍

Available manga link: https://manhuascan.me/manga/persona-4-official 

VISUALIVE (stageplay)

you will never see adachi ever act like a cunt like this ever again. he only does it once because hes gay.

i have made a million essays about this this is the foundation of this gas station itself

Available video links to the only things i’ve subbed ever because they’re the most important ones to this fruit’s development:

https://youtu.be/mWRB1dIgFNE

https://youtu.be/QRps3M9uXiw

or you can watch the whole thing because Masami Itou’s portrayal of him is just delightful: https://youtu.be/7oTpjmeD-mk 

Arena Ultimax; Episode Adachi

hahaha. haha. laughs weakly. haha.

I would kindly ask everybody to do this in Japanese dub but otherwise ehmmm yeah ! Episode Adachy. I do enjoy how they try to elaborate how his personalities are coalescing into a single face as he doesnt have to fake around people anymore. Like the fact that his lame humor is still present and he’ll do stupid voices, which makes you wonder if he was always like this or that it’s something he adopted while acting out the last facade he’s done for over a year—or more. 

HE IS SO FUCKING OPINIONATED AND THINKS HES SO COOL he has SO MUCH PRIDE but also he doesnt at the same time. you think hes a soldier surviving in the idgaf war but hes still dying in the mines he planted and crossfire for multiple reasons. hes simultaneously a teenage girl and a man in his late twenties.

Adachi is totally giving a fuck, not just in a white girl bully “I’m better than everyone” kind of way but like he’s totally giving a fuck about a lot of things. “Oh I gotta stop whatever this god has going down for this city in bumfuck nowhere because the case is going to go around in circles and i’ll never serve jail time in peace” how many times has he turned corners in an alleyway maze just by saying this.

hes literally trembling in his shoes with everything happening in that hour but hes just so good at bottling up emotions from others and HIMSELF. Theres only so much he’ll admit in his own monologue—in his own thoughts. That hes aware of things but he’ll never say it out loud even in his own head i’ll tear him apart with my bare hands <- i am just genuinely annoyed he can do this and not me but i should be grateful that i can express myself than be an emotionally repressed asshole 

He finds kids who are mirrors where he sees himself in. One, a goody two-shoes who has it all, the other an actual brat with a fucked up life from loneliness, isolation, and abuse (a million other things). And he’s not annoyed only because he finds similarities between him and them, but the fact that they’re children and they have at least a decade more than his ass which he spent sulking about with.

He’s mad at Bancho because he has his way from the kindness and generosity of his time he’s spent with others, something Adachi didn’t do; in which he could use his situation with his family and education as an excuse, but he never brings that up because as much as he likes seeing others eat shit and he has his way, Adachi also considers himself a fuckup. can you see this irony. So many chances to get out there and socialize, but he stuck his nose in his studies thinking a good future’s already laid out for him—BUT THE BUBBLE POPPED which is what fucking happens when youre in Japanese economic depression after the bubble economy. and you dont bother to leave your comfort zone either EVEN WHEN YOU DONT NECESSARILY like the things youre doing because it’s the only damn thing you’re used to !!!!

He’s sick of Sho because he’s an oversized 10 year old who’s doing the exact same thing Adachi’s done in the past and Adachi is sick of that. he hates himself. and he’ll hate a kid for acting the same way. He’ll project so much he’ll fix another person’s mistakes not out of pure goodness of his heart, but because he doesnt like himself as a person no matter how much he tries to deflect these thoughts in his own head.

Adachi’ll scoff and nitpick Narukami because he doesn’t want to admit this better version of him is better. That he’s not this other guy, but rather, he’s just himself. He complains and whines about Dojima and even says he “hates him,” but is everyone not aware he’s the second biggest tsundere in this series next to Marie at this point. they are COMPETING for that number one title.

no matter how many times he tries to sever connections for the sake of the other party, those bonds are developed enough for the other party to WANT to tie it back together. he doesnt know how to build bridges, but he doesnt know how to properly burn them either. hes sloppy at everything he does. he is gay.

okay sorry about that im sososo dizzy honestly. where was i. i talked about his issue with his Persona before and how it isnt his Persona a million times on this blog sorry i really everything's spinning right now 'and you're still writing an adachi essay?' hushup

Japanese Bubble Economy: https://www.britannica.com/topic/bubble-economy 

Available Video Link: https://youtu.be/0TkRLCGqT3g 

Arena Ultimax Manga Adaptation (Rokuro Saito)

this is a bit funny. i read it mostly for Sho like. while i do adore it as very beautiful adaptation. when it comes to adachi uhh. hmm. looks around. the rokuro saito effect. he did mementos mission too if you're wondering and what I mean by this.

I mean he did reinforce Adachi getting proper police training and essentially being above average to the top of his classes (krav maga, shooting accuracy, detectivisms, etc.). His humor and mannerisms are also delightful i think personally with the way they're illustrated and essentially visualized. Rokusai has his quirk for drawing everybody really pretty which he does really well for Persona characters, but it also caught me really off guard when he works on adachi like okay! sho breaking his ribs can fix everything itsok.

Available manga link: https://m.manganelo.com/manga-cn116859

OH now this is the section where im a bit iffy with the characterization here but i still like to reference it sometimes

The Golden Animation

Blu-ray/DVD Vol. 2; Bonus Drama CD: A Sense of Gratitude

Adachi doesnt have a big part here he’s literally there to help with the Dojima garden and Narukami plants cabbages for him.

Available Video Link: https://youtu.be/1SNKljdyUcY?t=640 (timestamped to 10:40)

Blu-ray/DVD Vol. 4; Bonus Drama CD: Boo ~ I bear a grudge on you ~

THIS. this, goodness gracious it was so silly. Adachi’s here for a few segments with Dojima in the pub. Detective yaoi if thats what you’re into I guess. He also sounds a bit cheeky here in speaking tone and the scheme he’s pulling to call Naoto to do their job while Dojima’s knocked out on duty.

Available Video Link: https://youtu.be/PasKTZtKx_c?t=720 (timestamped at 12:00)

The Animation

i dont have much to say about the actual anime i dont really watch it, but i respect the Narukami truthers out there. It’s just not for me, nor do I reference it for Adachi at all. why does he look like this

i dont have that much judgement to say if it's good enough to use as reference for Adachi besides it visualizing how much of a goofball he is, I guess I could mention that. I have issues of it depicting lore but otherwise i dont think it's that much different than what the base game pulls besides it different pacing to better fit the animation medium.

Standalone Drama CD Vol. 2: You'll understand when you get older

Not particularly partial with this one because the anime gave Narukami a face, like he’s his own character here. Dojima makes Adachi go to Okina and deliver something because his clown ass forgot to hand it over to the other prefect police who visited within the day. Narukami’s off to go help Ebi stand in line for a makeup promo and Dojima says they can go together. There’s a subplot with the IT where they think Narukami’s being arrested lol so they go follow him throughout the rest of the drama.

Adachi just hangs out with the silly billy that is his boss’ nephew who has so much kindness and generosity that it could get the kid killed one day.

Available Video Playlist Link: https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PL2Wysh6PBhe_jyqxxIcyt_XrW6GcKHRn0 

The Golden (PS VITA 2013)

I scratch my head and wonder what they were going for with Adachi’s Social Link besides the fanservice. I mean thats what they did with akc in royal i guess. <- has my own opinions about this but im closing my mouth.

It feels a bit too… intimate for me? What’s the deal with WANTING to invite him for dinner… without Dojima around either. Like they’re a two in one package for me, you can’t see one without the other most of the time. Like Adachi’s slacking off work while Dojima’s slaving away by himself? I’ve always believed they get off at the same time or something because of the subordinate status.

I did enjoy the Junes segments though, it kind of felt like it was a good placement—if you move things around a bit. Him hiding behind your back while you’re doing groceries so it looks like he’s busy was a bit funny, and him chatting you up while you’re supposed to be busy yourself is also silly if you consider that Bancho himself wants to bail and was just caught into his chismosa and whining. He has enough of a degree of association with you as you’re putting your nose into the murder case and that you’re his boss’ nephew, so that’s kind of why you’re the only few people he can talk to.

(pauses yes or yes ) i also ate ice cream where was I going with this

dont make me talk about the accomplice ending that thing’s pretty corny to me but also unnerving i dont want to think about it alot.

With the way things have gone for Adachi’s new characterization with the added Social Link and the new events for Golden, it personally made me think twice about it all, especially when his TV studio and Shadow self ended up the same. There’s a lot to go about this? (<- deranged) and I will admit that I myself got sucked into the idea that he’s an antagonist and couldn’t truly experience everything right at that point. whoopsie. Then again, looking at it at this point in time after a few years makes me realize yeah maybe this does make a bit of sense! The nature of the fog has changed, which can explain the drastic change in character between Namatame and Adachi. which is an essay for another day I really feel a bit out of it.

The “um” segment. Stuff I dont really like to reference nor put in the pot that makes adachi soup because im really iffy with it and how the writing was taken liberally for the sake of the audience rather than the reinforcement of source material itself.

The Golden Animation

The Adachi centric episodes 6, 7, and the accomplice ending bonus episode lol, as the whole Golden anime was really for Marie and other new Golden add-ons like Okina and scooters and ski trip and etc. 

how do I put this. im really opinionated on this segment it’s okay if you dont take my word for it. I dont like the production quality. The animation is honestly really bad and the artstyle itsnt tasteful with how it’s executed. There’s enough frames of Marie that people looking over my shoulder while I watch would call her Adachi. It really is a boatload of a cashgrab and fanservice that kind of adds new insightful things to the lore but honestly? I don;t trust it. Like the writers forgot what they were writing about and started writing fanfiction of what they originally made.

It did give some insight with Adachi, but I hate how they just made Narukami the way he is for this adaptation. Like the boy does have all the time in world and hes not an overworked high-schooler with so many commitments now he can… make a man dinner and deliver it to him…? I would definitely say “> Adachi doesn't seem to lead a nutritionally balanced life...” and leave it at that, i am not making him dinner i dont have time for that. can someone get this guy a girlfriend please. Don’t get me started how they treated his character development and lore surrounding him overall im sick of it. At least Sogabe made it all look pretty.

anyway here’s the part where i can add my closing thoughts as someone who fills a niche solely because they think and enjoy things so differently than the present majority. I don’t think im mature enough to enjoy things peacefully in a community full of different people but also because im losing the idgaf war myself. I’m glad I can enjoy a media in general and I’m so happy when people can enjoy it with me. (had to stop the cat from clawing on the vacuum he likes the texture apparently) where was I

hold my hand as i go through a hundred coming of age arcs in my life and that one day i wont be as embarrassed as i am now to admit i like tohru adachi as a character and talk about him with a restraint so childish because I dislike how a majority depict him. he’s part of my journey as i learn things about myself as much as mimi but in a more human way because. hes human. or something. one day i can forget his reputation in the community and create all the things i make with pure love that is not fueled by spite to be right and correct. I already know i am right and correct because everyone can enjoy things their own way and find things that they like in one thing that are different from things others like. for now, i will still treat him like an insufferable uncle older brother thing whose arm i periodically chew on until i reach bone and let him carry me back to bed when im tired of being annoyed of him. 

#long post #persona 4 spoilers #persona 4 arena spoilers #kommento #sulululat #pagsususuri #tohru adachi #p4 #// SCREAAAMS SO FUCKING LOUDDDD IM FREEE IM FREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE THIS SHULDNT HAVE TAKEN THE WHOLE DAY BUT IT DIDDDD IT FUCKING DIDDDDD #// sorry for code switching in the middle of writing i was trying to translate this word and it didnt feel right as a direct tl #// friend cameo shes the one who read the manga and watched vl with me and proved my theories thatnks to friendship #// MEME BY ANOTHER BESTIE TOO THIS IS TEAMWORK #// sorry for what happened at the ultimax segment im normal now i prommy #// revising this on laptop MY BACK HUURTTSSS FUCKKK #// the rokusai part is another thing though these tags are like an hour apart #// i think im done oh my god im so tired i couldnt put rokusai's manga in the diagram IM SORRY ROKUROSAITOOOO #// i dont want to say this is a dissertation of sorts but all of the things i write are incomprehensible mishmashes of information put toge #// ANYWAY IM DONE FOR ! IM TIRED ! this is the biggest adachi centric thing ive done right next to the tierlist explanation i dont think iv #// ever posted here IM SORRY OKYAKUSAN !!!!!!! anyway heres the . fuckingg. thing. highlighting manager's choice because thats MEEEE :33333

[theangel-aziraphale]

how accurate are Dante's works?

Well... to say they were accurate at all is to imply that he had personally visited Hell. Or heard real accounts about it.

No, instead, he had a demon in his ear.

Crowley thought it would be funny! Only his colourful descriptions have changed the public's view of hell. Even down to Lucifer's depiction. I mean, really, he can get big when he's upset, of course, but normally he looks like you or I.

Although I will admit I hadn't personally been down there myself, I've only visited once before and that was... uh. Nevermind.

Anyway, really poor Dante couldn't have relied on anyone more fiendish for the job. Not that I could have given him a better account, but it is what it is!

#aziraphale posts #good omens #good omens rp #good omens roleplay #good omens asks #good omens askblog #go aziraphale #aziraphale #aziraphaleposting #good omens aziraphale #good omens 2 #aziraphale lore #// another book to own ty anon! #// i always forget that one and i studied it for a game design thing i had to do at uni! i got to design a chibi lucifer. #// i got a fairly decent grade for that project 😭 #// sorry this took so long yesterday i was very burnt-out after work but im fine now! its taken me days to answer this 😂 🩵🩵

[chaotictarlos]

My stay at home honeymoon fic is almost 10K words

#i haven't written as much this summer as i thought i would #im so sorry its taken me so long to post things #i didn't expect RL to start going so good so quickly

[noirapocalypto]

I think I just need to sob into someone’s shoulder. I think that would really fix me. I just want someone to be with me while I cry. Even for a little bit.

#took a smol t-break I’m high again #relaxing in my new house #my nuu hoose #feeling peace for the first time in a long while #listening to good music while being high is one of the best things #I’m vibing #I should have taken my last edibles instead Damn #it’s all right #also the post was because I imagined hugging my therapist for some reason #because I cried a lot every single session I’ve gone to since which isn’t a lot I admit #anyways—there’s a scene in Ted lasso where he asks dr. Sharon for a hug #and I wish that was appropriate to ask #because I think I would have felt more comfortable opening up after that #I just felt like talking #don’t mind me #I also overshare hella when I’m stoned so sorry in advance

[piosplayhouse]

Hmm I saw a post where someone was fixing AI generated art which is fine but one of the things they "fixed" was correcting a cross-eye that the AI had generated and making both eyes face the same direction and hmm... could we not do that lol

#just talking out loud because its really taken me a long time to accept that cross eyes and wall eyes are things that people have so its ok #to represent them in art. i mention it every so often but it is really hard to not feel like i need to correct eye facing errorsd #despite having misaligned eyes myself haha . idk not the biggest problem the art community has but it's not talked about i suppose #i dont really post dr anymore but i saw this sometimes with spamton art where people would only draw him with 'crazy eyes ' when he was #being . yknow silly . and ig thats kind of canon but it is a little weird to think about it too deeply #sorry anyway im doing laundry lol

[fnafawoundleftbleedingau]

...partially considering holding off on posting AWLB part 2 until I've got like, the whole thing written, and re-read/reworked in places fully.

#insomniac hyena rambles #idk if I will. just been thinking lately #sorta realized how badly I stifle myself with my work because of someone I know #and just how much anxiety they give me over my hobbies sometimes #sitting aside for a bit and working on that personal project and just #having the space to do whatever was so damn nice and refreshing #and I want my posted works to have that same feeling #i feel like it may be why i keep having trouble with AWLB part 2 and staying focused #I keep looking at it through that anxiety lens they've saddled me with #it may just be this time of the year gettting to me too thats making really consider holding off on AWLB like this too. but. #the other stuff really doesnt help either #sorry for ranting. um #long story short. taking concerns from others into account is fine #but theres a big difference in things that are constructive and actually should be taken into account #and just not making something that's exactly what someone else wanted when you're just trying to create for yourself #don't let anyone pull the joy out of your hobbies for you. you'll just upset yourself. struggled to find joy in your work- #and get frustrated as hell with people.

[vamptastic]

i genuinely don't understand what capitalist countries stand to gain by fighting each other instead of collaborating economically. like why does the us warmonger against china when we would benefit more from trade? ostensibly it's for moral reasons, but regardless of the veracity of any given claim i think the united states has shown itself to prioritize economic success over human rights on a number of occasions especially during the cold war. i suppose i assume most wars are waged on the grounds of economic gain (natural resources, global political power, straight up money in the form of the military-industrial complex) but you could make an equally solid argument that just as many are waged over purely social and political issues- ethnic and religious conflict, blind nationalism, the whims of a dictator. it just confuses me at times, i guess. i have a hard time believing that the united states is bound and determined to wage war against china over human rights abuses, infringing on other countries sovereignty, and neo-colonialism in africa when we've propped up fascist dictators in many a country who've done far worse. is it literally just the association with communism? because surely whatever evil fuckers actually want war know that china is very far from communist right now. is it just nationalism? the idea that we must be on the top of the totem pole, even if our economy would stand to gain from trade? because i suppose i could believe that, but i think if that was true we wouldn't have gotten to where we are today in the first place. blegh. at the end of the day i am also ignoring the fact that many many different groups of people want war against china for reasons ranging from sinophobic jingoist nationalism to a genuine belief that the united states is a global moral watchdog determined to establish ~democracy~ worldwide. but there is a definite slant to media coverage on china right now, genuine attempts at disinformation, and given that the media in the us is so deeply tied to corporate interests it leads me to believe that there has to be some economic motive here, and it frustrates me that i can't figure out what it is.

#this post is long and convoluted and circuitous. sorry. #please do not try to like. publically own me or erupt into moral outrage over this post if you're reading it btw. #suppose i would be interested in hearing others takes on this but im just curious i genuinely don't have answers here #i don't want to argue or be accused of being immoral for not taking a hard stance on an incredibly complex issue. #anyway. i am also not trying to say that either the us or china are ' good ' or ' bad ' #insomuch as any country can be good or bad. particularly a country millenia old or one that changes leadership every four years. #individual actions taken by each government are undeniably bad. yes. #but as a us citizen i find it very difficult to find reliable information about what is happening in other countries. #our media has become so wildly polarized that you can often figure out national issues by looking at both sides #but when the media is unified on portraying one falsehood both left and right? you're fucked. #often media that claims to be neutral could be more accurately described as western #i trust ap and the bbc on us politics - not global politics. #all that being said when it comes to things like the treatment of uighur muslims or the political situation in hong kong and taiwan. #i'm not entirely sure what to believe. #and i also believe that if every single immoral act the us claims china has done is real... we still wouldn't wage war based purely on that #...i do genuinely think the claims that china is colonizing africa by offering loans is horseshit though #even if it was itd be fucking rich for european countries that wrecked africa in the first place #to moralize about the means by which another global power allows them potential economic power #the problem arises from capitalism on a global scale itself i mean #there is no way to build up infrastructure and trade routes for an entire continent without #in some way eventually profiting from it #i do see the comparison to the us and latin america and i think that's kinda apt but #the way ppl talk about it you'd think they were doing what france did to haiti good god