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#Mrs. Gloop
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Mrs. Gloop: Any luck? Mr. Gloop: Of course not! How am I supposed to find a schtuffed cat in ze voods at night?! Mr. Gloop: Vy can't Augustus keep track of his toys? I must be crazy to be out here. Mrs. Gloop, calling for the stuffed cat: MIIINKAAAA!!! Mrs. Gloop: Oops. (embarrassed laughter) Mr. Gloop: I may be crazy, but I'm not as crazy as you.
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rolex-kaard · 7 months
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redraws of quentin blake's illustrations
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"Mr. Wonka doesn't seem to think so!" cried Mrs. Gloop. "Just look at him! He's laughing his head off! How dare you laugh like that when my boy's just gone up the pipe! You monster!" she shrieked, pointing her umbrella at Mr. Wonka as though she were going to run him through. "You think it's a joke, do you? You think that sucking my boy up into your Fudge Room like that is just one great big colossal joke?"
"He'll be perfectly safe," said Mr. Wonka, giggling slightly.
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blink blonk here's some human bill designs im experimenting with
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rknchan · 1 year
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i guess someone else has already done that but nevertheless i couldnt help :ccc
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artgygrl · 6 months
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catcf my version the parents
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wonkaconfessions · 1 year
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I have a personal headcanon that Augustus’ parents had a hard time conceiving children. Mrs Gloop couldn’t get pregnant for a long time. When she finally did the baby ended up being very sick and couldn’t put on weight and didn’t make it. When she could finally get pregnant again and it ended up a healthy baby, she ended up spoiling him with food because she was so afraid of losing another child. That’s also why she was the oldest mother out of all the parents (based on the actresses ages at the time)
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siglai · 2 years
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HIII IM BACK :D i think i did alright !!!! i didnt fuck up super badly on stage and it was p fun :3 we read off scripts and stuff it was silly
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stargirlshooter · 2 years
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There Perfect….Bring Them To Me
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Conversation
How the five ticket winner families decorate their trees:
(The Gloops)
Mrs. Gloop: Okay, boys! Let's decorate ze treeeeeeeeeeee!
Augustus: I'm hungry. Let's eeeeeeeeeeeeat.
(The Beauregardes)
Mrs. Beauregarde: Each icicle must be carefully placed.
Violet: I subscribe to the school of "throw and go".
(The Salts)
Mr. Salt: Sylvie, don't chew on that cord!
Veruca: Yeah, Sylvie, save room for the bubble lights.
(The Teavees)
Mr. Teavee: We can't have a blue bulb next to a blue bulb, can we?
Mike: Anything that doesn't set the tree on fire works for me, pal.
(Wonka and the Buckets)
Wonka: One thing I'll never understand, Charlie. In spite of all the chaos, the ugly tree and old decorations... Everything turns out perfectly.
Charlie: One of the mysteries of the universe.
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suppotato123 · 4 months
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The cast and crew of the Wonka movie want so bad for us to believe that Timothée Chalamet’s Wonka is going to grow up to be Gene Wilder’s Wonka, and I know he’s got a lot of years ahead of him, but I just can’t picture him falling so far from grace that he becomes that sort of person. I do think, however, that future story tellers could have a great opportunity to use his already established naivety, clumsiness, and total lack of common sense to make the golden ticket winners fall into their particular unsavory situations sheerly because of Wonka’s oversight, and not malicious intent or apathy.
Augustus: *falls into the chocolate river*
Wonka: Oh my goodness! Augustus try and swim back to shore!
Augustus: *is starting to go under*
Wonka: Okay that didn’t work! Stop struggling! Try and float on your back!
Mrs. Gloop: Vhy are you just standing zere? Call your Factory vorkers to come get him!
Wonka: *makes a thoughtful face* Huh, that makes a lot more sense, actually.
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Here are a couple of poses I was playing with for the Mrs. Gloop piece.
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comicaurora · 9 months
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My younger sister: “I’m getting more and more concerned about Aurora. I don’t like Mr. Gloopy-Pants very much.”
…permission to refer to gloop monster as Mr. Gloopy-Pants?
Mr. Gloopy-Pants allows this
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hereforreadandwrite · 9 months
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Chapter Three
Masterlist
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"(Y/N)!!! Hurry! Hurry!" cried Charlie who was waiting with his parents.
"One second! I'm coming!"
You were finishing styling your long hair (Y/H/C). You put your hairbrush on the bedside table before leaving your room to join the Bucket family. All eyes were on you. You ran your hands nervously over your new skirt.
"It suits me well?" you asked with an embarrassed smile.
"You're so beautiful," Charlie said smiling at you.
"A beautiful young woman" commented Grandma Josephine.
"Maybe you'll finally find a man for a husband," joked Grandpa George.
"Pop," growled Mr. Bucket.
"Come on kids. We gotta get going before we're late," Mrs. Bucket said as she picked up the coats. "Let's go! Let's go!"
You kissed your grandparents who wished you a good day. You were uncomfortable when you kissed Grandpa Joe who patted your back. He refused to talk to you or even look at you. It wasn't your fault it was also your dream to meet Willy Wonka. You were wishing your grandparents a good day, leaving the cabin with your uncle, your aunt and Charlie. The boy was more excited than you, literally making you run to get to the chocolate factory as quickly as possible. Your excitement subsided when you saw the crowd gathering in front of the gates. You showed them your golden ticket. The police let you pass and put you in line with the other families. Charlie took your hand looking shyly at the other children. Beside them, you were doing a bit of a task. Augustus was eating his chocolate with his mouth wide open, Violet was chewing gum loudly, Mike was tapping his foot nervously and Veruca was ordering her father to move the clock forward so he could go inside.
"Badly behaved children," you thought as you pulled Charlie closer to you.
You and Charlie turned one last time to see Mr. and Mrs. Bucket waving at each other and blowing kisses. At ten o'clock sharp, the gates of the chocolate factory opened. Your hand tightened around Charlie's.
"Please enter!"
The group entered quickly, passing the huge gate.
"Come forward"
The group advanced to the huge gates.
"Close the gates!"
The gates closed with an ominous creak as the group continued to advance to the doors.
"Dear visitors, it is my great pleasure to welcome you to my humble factory. Who am I? Well..."
The group stopped in front of the huge doors that revealed huge red velvet curtains, which opened on a musical puppet show that sang the glory of Willy Wonka. Your gaze fell on Charlie. The boy was looking at you as perplexed as you. The other parents and children were also perplexed, except Mrs. Gloop and her son. The end of the show was ludicrous, a firework was triggered which set fire to the puppets, melting them and making their eyes pop out of their sockets. The music distorted before finally shutting up. What had just happened? The group was snapped out of their minds by hearing someone giggle and clap frantically. All eyes fell on the man who was smiling with all his perfectly white and perfectly aligned teeth. Your eyes widened when you saw that the excited man was none other than the strange man who had helped you and offered the clothes you were wearing. The man was quickly climbing the stairs, carefully observing his guests.
"Who are you?" Violet asked with an unpleasant tone.
"Willy Wonka," you say in a small voice.
"Really?" Charlie asked under his breath.
Willy observed his guests with a huge smile, his breathing was noisy. His gaze met yours. You quickly looked away, preferring to focus on your new shoes. God, that was terribly embarrassing.
"Good morning, starshine! The Earth says hello!"
The guests watched Willy Wonka in awkward silence. Seeing this, the famous chocolatier rummaged in his coat to pull out small cards.
"Dear guests, greetings. Welcome to the factory. I shake you warmly by the hand," he said, holding out his hand to his guests when he realized he shouldn't have said that line. He quickly retracted his hand. "My name is Willy Wonka."
"Then shouldn't you be up there?" Veruca asked, pointing to the throne that had appeared during the show.
"I couldn't very well watch the show from up there, now, couldt I, little girl?"
"Mr. Wonka," Charlie called, taking a step forward. "I don't know if you remember, but our grandfather worked in your chocolate factory."
"Was he one of tose despicable spies who every day tried to steal my life's work and sell it to tose parasitic copycat candy making cads?" he asked in a harsh and threatening tone.
By reflex, you put your arm around your cousin, drawing him towards you, glaring severely at the chocolatier. Willy lifted his head slightly, meeting your eyes (Y/E/C). You held his gaze, daring him to go after your Charlie.
"N-no, sir," Charlie replied shyly.
"Good! Say hello to him," Willy replied cheerfully. "Let's get a move on, kids!"
Willy turned his back on his guests, rushing into his chocolate factory at a rapid pace. Seeing this, everyone quickly caught up with the famous chocolatier. Augustus asked him if he wanted to know their first name. To which Willy replied that he didn't see the point before changing the subject, saying that they had a lot to do. The group arrived in a huge corridor and were struck by the sweltering heat.
"Just drop your coats anywhere," Willy said pulling off his long red velvet jacket which he threw on the floor along with his weird sunglasses.
"Mr. Wonka. It sure is toasty in here," Mr. Teavee said, removing his jacket.
"What?" asked the chocolatier, turning to the man. "Oh! Yes! I have to keep it warm in here because my workers are used to an extremely hot climate. They just can't stand the cold."
"Who are the workers?" Charlie asked curiously.
"All in good time," he said before looking at you. "Now..."
You felt your cheeks blush when you saw his eyes for the first time. He was looking you up and down, a proud smile stretching his lips. The chocolatier started walking, crossing the huge hallway when Violet hugged him. Willy tensed, grimacing in disgust.
"Mr. Wonka, I'm Violet Beauregarde!" she said while loudly chewing her gum
"Oh... I don't care," he replied with a small forced smile as he continued on his way.
"Well, you should care! I'm the kid who's gonna win the special prize at the end."
"Well, you do seem confident, and confident is key."
You looked at Willy perplexed. He didn't seem convinced of what he had just said. On the other hand, mrs. Beauregarde was delighted. Veruca rushed in front of the chocolatier who was forced to stop, his expression distorted by another grimace.
"I'm Veruca Salt. It's very nice to meet you, sir," she said with a small bow.
"I always thought a verruca was a type of wart you got on the bottom of your foot."
You couldn't help but giggle. Willy looked at you out of the corner of his eye, a slight smile appeared on his lips when his attention was drawn to Augustus Gloop, his face covered in dry chocolate and crunching a piece of chocolate with his teeth.
"I'm Augustus Gloop. I love your chocolate!"
"I can see that. So do I. I never expected to have so much in common," he said halfheartedly before turning back to Mike. "You. You're the little devil who cracked the system. As for you two... you're only lucky to be here. And the rest of you must be their-"
Willy was gagging trying to say that word. Mr. Salt said the word parent, which made Willy laugh nervously.
"Yeah! Moms and dads," he said before his eyes clouded over. "Dad? Daddy..."
"Mr Wonka?" you called passing your hand in front of the chocolatier who came out of his trance. "Are you doing well?"
"Sure, Barley sugar. Let's move along."
Willy turned his back on the small group, advancing to the door which was at the end of the corridor. You couldn't help glancing at Willy out of the corner of your eye. You would never have believed that this extravagant man ran this world-famous chocolate factory. Was this guy making fun of you? He had listened to your complaints against your family, he had offered you his clothes that you dreamed of having. Your fingers twitched thinking of something. Willy knew you had won the day you found the golden ticket. When you first met, he must have thought you looked grotesque in Grandma Georgina's old clothes and he didn't want to be ashamed in front of the reporters. Willy Wonka bought you his clothes to avoid public humiliation. You were snapped out of your thoughts when you felt Charlie's hand tug on your sweater. You realized that the hallway was shrinking more and more. The adults had no choice but to crouch in front of the tiny door. How were they going to get into the room?
"Important room, this," Willy said, pulling out a big bunch of keys. "After all, it is a chocolate factory."
"Then why is the door so small?" Mike muttered.
"It's to keep all the great big chocolate flavor inside! haha!"
This answer was strange. Willy inserted the key in the lock, slowly unlocking the tiny door. The chocolate maker slowly reached for the door, the leather of his glove making a creaking sound, to push the double door wide enough to let the group in. The smell of chocolate and sugar penetrated your nostrils. The ground was covered with grass and some strange plant you had never seen, there was a chocolate waterfall and a river running through the huge room.
"Now, do be careful, my dear children. Don't lose your heads. Don't get over excited. Just keep... very... calm," Willy said calmly.
In shock, Augustus dropped his bar into the grass. You carefully observed the surroundings, not hearing Charlie whisper that this place was magnificent and Willy's gaze resting on you, affirming the words of your young cousin. You didn't notice the glare Madame Beauregarde left you either.
"Every drop of the river is hot melted chocolate of the finest quality," Willy began as he walked into the room, followed closely by his guests before turning to them. "The waterfall is most important. Mixes the chocolate. Churns it up. Makes it light and frothy. By the way, no other factory in the wolrd mixes its chocolate and waterfall, my dear children. And you can take that to the bank. "
The chocolatier started walking again, leading the little group into the room. All of his sweets made your mouth water, but there were so many things you didn't know where to start. The group was crossing a small bridge, passing over the chocolate river when your attention was caught by a strange machine, flying above your heads.
"People!" Willy called, catching the attention of his guests. "Those pipes suck up the chocolate and carry it away, all over the factory. Thousands of gallons an hour. Yeah. And do you like my meadow? Try some of my grass. Please have a blade. Please do. it's so delectable and so darn good-looking."
"You can eat the grass?" Charlie asked, clinging to your arm.
"Of course you can! Everything in this room is eatable. Even I'm eatable. But that is called cannibalism, my dear children. And is, in fact, frowned upon in most societies."
This Willy Wonka had a pretty weird sense of humor.
"Enjoy!" he exclaimed, separating you with a wave of his hand. "Go on! Scoot! Scoot!"
The group quickly separated to run for the sweets they were craving so much. Charlie let go of your arm to go to his side. You were getting closer to a plant made entirely out of some sort of chocolate bulb. You withdrew one of the bulbs uncertainly before bringing it to your lips, crunching the candy. The taste of the chocolate was exquisite and the cream soft. It was the best chocolate you had eaten.
"Delicious, isn't it?"
You jumped when you heard your host's voice. You turned to Willy Wonka. The strange man had his Cheshire smile on his lips as his hands gripped his cane.
"I knew this clothes pulled beautifully, Barley sugar. You look lovely," he praised, smiling at you.
"T-thank you," you say uncomfortably, running your free hand up your skirt. "I thank you again for this gifts, mr Wonka."
"Mr Wonka makes me look old. Please call me Willy, Barley sugar. I would love to know your name too. Now we are no longer strangers."
"(Y/N) (Y/L/N)."
"(Y/N)," he said dreamily, testing her name on his lips. "It's a very nice name. So (Y/N), do you like the visit?"
"Yes, this piece is extraordinary," you say, smiling. "There are so many things to taste, but it's impossible to know where to start."
"This way!"
Willy grabbed your wrist, dragging you to the edge of the river where there were flowers whose petals looked like pale pink crystals. The chocolatier picked one of the flowers. He took out a petal and brought it to your mouth. Your cheeks began to blush, you parted your lips, slightly sticking out your tongue, allowing Willy to lay the pale pink petal there. The candy melted on your tongue, the taste was so sweet. Could the morning dew have a taste?
"Morning dew?" you asked surprised.
"Yes, a delicate candy, isn't it?" he asked, picking up a new petal that he was examining before eating it. "So fragile and refined. Kind of like you."
Hearing that, you had a hard time swallowing the candy. Why did he have to say such an embarrassing thing? You were about to ask him why he hadn't told you who he was when you got home, but Willy stuffed the candy into your mouth preventing you from asking any questions.
"Later, Barley sugar," he said in a low, deep voice, running his fingers over your cheek. "We have plenty of time."
"Daddy, look over there! What is it? It's a little person! Over there, by the waterfall," Verruca exclaimed drawing the others' attention.
Everyone was closing in on the little girl, staring at the oddly short man who was working to harvest the sweet plants. You were taken out of your contemplation by feeling someone push you, forcing you to step back. Your gaze met that of Mrs. Beauregarde. She looked you up and down before chuckling. You felt your heart sink when you saw her laughing at you. You nervously played with your fingers, unaware that the other adults had noticed several other identical little men and the story of Willy in the land of Loompaland.
"Augustus, my child! It's not a good thing you do!" growled Mrs. Gloop.
All attention was now on Augustus. The boy was on the other side of the bank, he plunged his hand into the river to drink the chocolate.
"Hey, little boy," Willy called as he approached the edge of the river. "My chocolate must be untouched by human hands!"
To everyone's surprise, Augustus lost his balance and fell headlong into the river. Mrs. Gloop gasped in shock as Willy rolled his eyes, annoyed at what was happening. The boy's mother rushed to the chocolatier telling him that her son could not swim. Despite the urgency, Willy remained impassive. His gaze rested on the pipes which were getting dangerously close. The corner of his lips quirked up as the pipe dipped into the chocolate and began sucking in the liquid. Your eyes widened as the power of the suction began to swirl, pulling poor Augustus in. The boy disappeared into the chocolate before reappearing in the pipe. The pressure from the machine increased, propelling the chubby boy into the pipe.
"There he goes," Violet said in a monotonous voice.
"Call the fire brigade!" exclaimed Mrs. Gloop panicked.
"It's a wonder how that pipe is big enough," Mrs. Beauregarde replied, ignoring Mrs. Gloop's panic.
"It isn't big enough," Charlie replied. "He's slowing down!"
"He's gonna stuck," Mike continued.
"He's stuck," Mr. Teavee said as he saw Augustus plug the pipe.
"He's blocked the whole pipe," said Mr. Salt.
Your attention was drawn to the Oompa Loompas. They had begun to hum and move in rhythm.
"What are they doing?" Veruca asked.
"They're going to treat us to a little song," Willy replied with a huge smile. "It is quite the special occasion. They haven't had a fresh audience in many a moon."
The Oompa Loompas began to sing a song about Augustus and his gluttony, all while dancing a suspicious choreography. At the end of the song, poor Augustus was sucked into the container before the "flying saucer" left the room. Willy was the only person to applaud the performance of his employees.
"Bravo! Well done!" he congratulated. "Aren't they delightful? Aren't they charming?"
"I say that all seemed rather rehearsed," Mr. Salt said suspiciously.
"Like they knew it was going to happen," Mike continued mumbling.
"Oh, poppycock," Willy replied as he walked towards the next post before being stopped by Mrs. Gloop.
"Where is my son? Where does that pipe go to?" she asked, pointing to the pipe that was pissing off her poor boy.
“That pipe, it just so happens to lead directly to the room where I make delicious strawberry-flavored chocolate-coated fudge."
"He will be made into strawberry-coated chocolate-flavored fudge! They'll be selling him by the pound all over the world?"
"No. I wouldn't allow it. The taste would be terrible! Can you imagine Augustus-flavored-chocolate-coated-Gloop? Ew! No one would buy it."
"You surprise me," you muttered.
Charlie clapped his hand over his mouth to keep from chuckling at your comment. You thought you saw Willy looking at you with an amused smile before making a strange cry. An Oompa Loompa arrived in front of his boss, eyeing him stoically. He was so small.
"I want you to take Mrs. Gloop to the fudge room, Okay? Help her find her son. Take a long stick and start poking around in the chocolate-mixing barrel, Okay?"
The Oompa Loompa nodded slightly, crossing his arms over his chest. Willy made the same gesture. The Oompa Loompa uncrossed his arms bowing in front of the chocolatier before approaching Mrs. Gloop. He tugged at her skirt, urging her to follow him. Mrs. Gloop left the room, leaving the group behind. The room had become silent.
"Mr. Wonka?"
"Huh?"
"How would Augustus' name already be in the Oompa Loompa's song, unless-?" Charlie asked.
"Improvisation is a parlor trick. Anyone can do it," Willy replied before turning to Violet. "You, little girl, say something. Anything."
"Chewing gum," she replied without hesitation.
"Chewing gum is really gross, chewing gum I hate the most. See? Exactly the same!" he said looking at new Charlies.
"No, it isn't," muttered Mike.
"You really shouldn't mumble. Because I can't understand a word you're saying," Willy said looking down at Mike before sighing and smiling. "Now, on with tour?"
The group stood in front of a tunnel entrance. A drumbeat rose through the air. A boat, resembling a candy pink seahorse was approaching. The sugar ship stopped in front of the group and the drumbeat ceased. The Oompa Loopams laughed like idiots as they eyed the group.
"What's so funny?" Violet asked irritably.
"I think it's from all those doggone cocoa beans. By the way, did you guys know that chocolate contains a property that triggers the release of endorphins? Gives one the feeling of being in love," he says as he lays his eyes on you .
You looked away, nervously clearing your throat as you put your arms around Charlier's shoulders. The boy was looking at you puzzled before his gaze landed on Willy Wonka. The atmosphere was strange. The moment was broken by Mrs. Beauregarde.
"You don't say," she said in a sultry voice.
Willy was ill at ease seeing the lustful look given to him by Mrs. Beauregarde.
"All abouard," he said nervously, motioning the group up.
The last three parents came up quickly, accompanied by their offspring. Charlie got into the boat first, settling on the last bench. You were about to get on when Willy held out his hand. You swallowed, staring at the chocolate maker who was smiling at you.
"Some help?" he asked, smiling at you.
"Yes thanks."
You took Willy's hand and climbed into the boat. You sat down next to Charlie, who snuggled up against you when he saw Willy settling down next to you. Your cousin brought his lips closer to your ear, placing his hands so no one else could hear what he was saying.
"I think Mr. Wonka likes you," he said before stepping back, chuckling.
"Stop talking nonsense," you say, shaking your head slightly.
"Onwards!"
The Oompa Loopam resumed beating the drum, setting the pace for his fellows. The boat resumed sailing, towards the entrance to the tunnel. Willy pulled out a candy pink ladle from under his seat, dipping it into the chocolate river and giving it to you.
"Here. Try some of this. It'll do you good. You look starved to death."
You took a sip of the chocolate before handing the ladle to Charlie.
"It's delicious," you say, glaring at Willy and smiling.
"That's because it's mixed by waterfall," he says smiling at you before looking at the others. "The waterfall is most important. It mixes the chocolate up. Churns it up, makes it light and frothy. And by the way, no other factory in the world-"
"You already said that," Veruca cut in, giving the chocolatier a bored look.
Willy was upset that he got cut like that. He slowly curled his finger, the leather making an unpleasant noise. The chocolatier's expression had grown stern as he looked at the children one by one.
"You're all quite short, aren't you?" he said, completely changing the subject.
"Well, yeah! We're children!" scolded Violet, continuing to chew her gum loudly.
"Well, that's no excuse! I was never as short as you."
"You were once," Mike replied.
"Was not! Know why? Because I distinctly remember placing a hat on top of my head," Willy said as he adjusted his hat on his head. "Look at you short, little arms. You could never reach."
"Do you even remember what it was like being a kid?" Charlie asked curiously, clinging to your arm.
"Boy, do I!" Willy laughed when his eyes grew cloudy and his smile faded. "Do I?"
You looked at Willy puzzled. He seemed to be reliving a painful memory. You put your hand on Willy's forearm, exerting a slight pressure that brought him out of his trance. The chocolatier turned his head towards you, his gaze boring into yours. Were you dreaming or were his eyes purple? Did he wear contact lenses? Your hand slid down his forearm, reaching for Willy's hand.
"Mr. Wonka? Mr. Wonka! We're headed for a tunnel," Charlie said.
You jumped when you realized what you were doing. You withdrew your hand from Willy's, avoiding his gaze, preferring to look at your new boots.
"Oh! Yeah," Willy replied. "Full speed ahead!"
The Oompa Loompa hit faster and the others rowed harder. The boat accelerated entering the dark tunnel. You couldn't see anything.
"How can they see where they're going?" Violet asked puzzled.
"They can't," Willy answered. "There's no knowing where they're going. Switch on the lights!"
The lights came on, illuminating the tunnel as the ship rolled forward. You couldn't suppress a terrified cry as you felt the boat being carried away by a much too fast current. On the first wave, you grabbed Willy's forearm. The chocolatier looked at you, an amused smile appeared on his lips when he saw you terrified. The boat was suddenly slowed down. You caught your breath when you realized you were holding Willy's forearm firmly. You excused yourself quickly, letting go of the chocolatier's hand, who was content to smile.
"People. Keep an eye out! We're passing some very important rooms here," Willy said looking at some strange doors.
You looked at the doors that seemed worthy of keeping safes with neon lights. Everything here was so strange. Mrs. Beauregarde's attention was drawn to a door where it was written "hair cream." Violet's mother turned to Willy, blinking.
“What do you use hair cream for?”
"To lock in moisture," the chocolate maker replied, laughing and lightly patting his hair.
You rolled your eyes, bringing your attention to the other doors. Your attention and that of Charlie was drawn to a room, the door of which was wide open, revealing Oompa Loopam whipping a cow who was quietly ruminating, not disturbed by the blows.
"Whip cream!" you say at the same time.
"Precisely!" laughed Willy, looking down at the two cousins.
"That doesn't make sense," Veruca replied, turning to the chocolatier and rolling her eyes.
Willy's smile disappeared as he turned his head towards the infamous girl.
"For your information, little girl, whipped cream isn't whipped cream at all unless it's been whipped with whips! Everybody knows that," he said with a smirk.
Veruca was shaking her head, turning her back on the chocolatier. It moved slightly, cracking the back of its neck. The interaction with Veruca had pissed him off, but he was trying to hide it. The sound of the drum grew louder and faster. Hearing that, Willy turned to you, taking your hand in his. You were watching the puzzled chocolate maker as the boat took a second steep descent. You closed your eyes clinging to Willy's arm when the ship made a complete turn on itself before slowing down abruptly.
"Stop the boat!" Willy ordered before looking at you. "I want to show you something."
"W-what?"
Willy chuckled as he pointed to the door in front of which the boat was stopping: Inventing Room.
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idontknowreallywhy · 5 months
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Commute day again! Today’s unedited train snippet is based on horrifying recent events in my own life.
I think it falls roughly within the fluffwhump category.
This was going to be a Gordon-centric fic but he didn’t quite experience the level of indignation I felt was merited, so big brother had to step up.
Hereby claiming “smirk” for Fluffember
Stress Relief
✈️✈️✈️✈️✈️✈️✈️✈️✈️✈️✈️✈️✈️✈️✈️✈️
Scott stood frozen in the middle of the room and felt the last shreds of sanity slip from his fingertips.
How could this have happened?
It had disrupted his understanding of the universe, as if reality itself had finally betrayed him.
The only anchor to his old life, the innocent, trusting life he had lived up until this juncture, was Gordon. His beloved little brother who was writhing on the floor at his feet, shaking and crying…
And howling with laughter.
At him.
Scott opened his mouth to raise an objection to his brother’s frivolous attitude to this disaster but no words came out. Instead, he coughed and spat foul tasting green slime on to the carpet.
It glittered offensively at him.
“H….hooooow?” He croaked desperately.
No explanation was forthcoming - the slippery little fish had rolled on to his stomach and was beating the floor with his fist. Scott spat more slime at him. He probably deserved it.
Wait, did he? Had this been a prank?
Bewilderment was shunted aside by anger.
“GORDON!! WHAT DID YOU DO?”
His brother looked up at him, eyes streaming:
“It wasn’t me, bro” Gordon gasped then bit on his own fist in an apparent attempt to regain some semblance of control “you’re not supposed to squeeze them that hard”.
A tiny seahorse figure fell from the end of Scott’s nose and Gordon dissolved into another fit of giggles.
Scott looked down at the slimy rubbery mess in his clenched fist and frowned, the confusion returning with backup.
“But isn’t… isn’t that… the… ENTIRE POINT?”
He waved the remains of Gordon’s puffer fish toy to emphasis his point and gloop splattered on to the ceiling. To join the rest of the gloop on the ceiling.
“It’s a stress ball! You squeeze the indestructible ball, it remains indestructible and you feel less stressed afterwards! THAT’S WHAT IT’S FOR!!”
Scott’s voice teetered on the edge of a whine.
“Yeah but none of them are really that robust big bro, particularly not in the face of Mr Big Cheese Businessman levels of stress.”
Uhoh. Scott looked down at the brand new, ridiculously expensive designer suit his PA had quietly handed him when he’d turned up ten minutes before the board meeting fresh off the back of a muddy rescue.
The suit oozed at him.
It was apt really. Some of the board members had oozed too. He’d just been sharing some of the ludicrous highlights with his little brother (who was always pleasingly sympathetic on the topic of corporate hogwash) and had absent-mindedly picked the actionably-falsely-advertised item off his brother’s bedside table to toss from hand to hand as he ranted.
He blinked rapidly as something slid into his field of vision. Gordon stood and gently plucked a tiny glittery shark from his commander’s eyebrow.
“Let’s get you cleaned up shall we?” Sympathetic tone and matching facial expression were being masterfully deployed.
“NOT my room. This stuff will ruin my nice carpet.” He sagged. “Honestly Gordo, it was such a tiny thing… how is there so much of this… ick?”
Brown eyes twinkled as Gordon smirked knowingly. “One of the mysteries of the cosmos, big brother.”
🦑🦑🦑🦑🦑🦑🦑🦑🦑🦑🦑🦑🦑🦑🦑🦑
Gordon steered his slimy brother into his own en-suite and closed the door behind him, turning away to survey the sparkling chaos his brother had created.
There was a pause. Gordon could hear the shower switch on and some indistinct muttering from the other side of the door. Then a cough, followed by a snort, followed by a bark of laughter.
Gordon smiled to himself. Maybe not quite what the designer had planned, but the little toy might have had its intended effect after all.
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frickfatphobes · 2 months
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i've heard people say things like "even if fatphobia was real, I wouldn't have learned it from media"
so let's make a list of all the fat villains and a-hole characters in media to try and prove that representation (even bad representation) can heavily influence the culture it influences:
• Ursula (The Little Mermaid)
• The Mayor (Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs)
• Big Jack Horner (Puss in Boots: The Last Wish)
• The Toad (Flushed Away)
• Vernon Dursley (Harry Potter)
• Doctor Octopus (Spider-Man 2)
• Stromboli (Pinocchio)
• Queen of Hearts (Alice in Wonderland)
• Wario (Super Mario Brothers Franchise)
• The Matchmaker (Mulan)
• Jabba the Hut (Star Wars)
• Buford (Phineas and Ferb)
• Dale "The Whale" Biederbeck (Mr. Monk)
• Augustus Gloop (Willy Wonka)
[feel free to help me continue this list]
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