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snakeautistic · 4 months

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One of the reasons I believed I couldn’t be autistic for so long was due to a fundamental misunderstanding of my social struggles. This being that I am not by any means incapable of memorizing social rules. Through observation and direction I can construct a broad framework of ‘socially acceptable or not.’ For example, I’m well aware that making physical contact with someone without consent isn’t acceptable. Or that stating blunt facts in a way that implicates someone negatively isn’t allowed. I know to avoid interrupting others if they’re already talking, to not walk away when I’m in the middle of a conversation. Crying, being unusually quiet and frowning indicates sadness. Someone smiling at laughing at what you’re saying means they probably are enjoying their time with you. An increase in speaking volume indicates excitement- either positive or negative. Sarcasm is often indicated by someone saying something absurd that you know they would never say, or you know to be factually wrong.

The fact that I had learned these broad rules made me think autism wasn’t a possibility for me. But being autistic doesn’t stop you from obtaining and applying information. (I mean that’s why so many interventions that ‘treat’ autism do result in the autistic person being able to pass as neurotypical.)

The difference comes from lacking the subconscious nuances and exceptions that come with those broader rules. For example- when is it okay to actually be honest? Some people will not be bothered by physical intimacy- but how would I know this? How can you tell if a group wants you to join in with their conversation? How to tell if this person is smiling and laughing politely or genuinely? How to tell if someone who you know very little about is being sarcastic?

There are not direct, easy to apply ‘rules’ for this, and yet clearly there are ‘right’ options. When the appropriate reaction must be determined by subtle body language or small shifts in tone of voice, ones that are near impossible to teach- I become completely lost.

That’s something I always find lacking with the general social skills advice given. It’s helpful to a point, but the truth is everyone is an individual. People express themselves differently, and react to your same actions differently due to past circumstances or temperaments. There is no one set of rules you can use for everyone, unfortunately. The majority of neurotypicals, while of course having miscommunications and the like, can rely on their subconscious to parse out any subtle changes they might need to make to their demeanor for a particular situation. My brain is much less adept at focusing down broader experience/rules into unique circumstances. (This is actually something that extends past social cues for me and I might make another post talking about it because I think it’s interesting)

Anyway rant over but yeah this was a huge mental barrier to seeking out a diagnosis for a while because at some level I ( ironically enough) took struggling to understand social cues too literally…

#actually autistic #autism #neurodivergent #neurodiversity #autistic #autistic things #autistic traits #autistic thoughts #low support needs #LSN autistic #social cues #socializing #social skills #asd #neurodivergence #autistic experiences #autism spectrum

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chrome-barkz-aac · 2 months

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so, me and my dad had a long conversation today about support needs, and how to manage them. because i only struggle with iADLs (barring the trouble with grooming that i have) i should be able to live independently, but unless i have help to do certain things (like chores or paying bills) i simply don't do them. i asked my dad how HE managed (he has ADHD and similar struggles with chores and bills, but he doesn't struggle with grooming like i do) and he said he bounced a lot of checks and his mom helped him with his laundry when he was in college. and he lived at home so he didn't have to worry about cleaning except for some chores he would help out with. what im saying is the responsibility of housekeeping for a whole apartment was off of his shoulders.

i want to go back to college in the fall but im worried that i'll struggle with those things again and my life will fall apart like it did last time (getting yelled at for not doing chores, breaking down over laundry, failing classes, meltdowns, etc).

i brought up living in a group home and said that although it would provide the support i need, i was worried that they only accepted MSN autistics. theyre also really expensive and idk if theres one thats a close distance from my university. it would be a good solution if i continue to lose skills (which i think i am, im having a harder time masking and keep losing speech even when calm)

my dad suggested living in the same city as he and my family and transferring schools but i want to go back to my lab at my current school and they have a much better biology program up in DFW than they do here. i could definitely benefit from the added support of my family though.

does ne 1 have ne ideas? or ways that they cope with iADL struggles? im trying to strategize early so that it doesnt sneak up on me.

#chrome barkz #actually autistic #autism #autistic #LSN autistic #iADL #iADLs

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willtheweirdrat · 9 months

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the community actually is starting to hate LSN autistics so much its destroying my hope of ever finding support and acceptance.

oh no dw about that! there is support and acceptance, and it ain't just one community, it's many. it's just up to knowing where to look. the more prevalent tumblr autism community is just made up by a larger in comparison percentage of MSN/HSN autistics, so many LSN just kinda get involved in it naturally. higher support needs autistics don't hate LSNs of course, it's just a matter of finding people you relate to. keep on looking anon!

#autism #asd #actually autistic #neurodivergent #actually neurodivergent #actually neurodiverse #lsn autistic #low support needs

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dynamopsychism · 6 months

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Almost went on a rant abt autism level/ support need discourse until I realized I really don’t want to be bothered

My discourse days are behind me and they will stay there

#not saying it’s wrong to be involved in discourse #it’s just that. I really can’t be bothered to deal with people who are blatantly wrong and ignorant #my post #actually autistic #LSN #lsn autistic #<- tags specific to me

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swordsonnet · 11 months

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lately, i've seen more people in the online autistic community acknowledging the struggles of people with higher support needs, which is of course an important development. but for some, that seems to come with the implicit assumption that low needs autistics "have it easy" or experience no stigma at all, which is just wrong??? people with low support needs are still disabled by their autism and still face discrimination because of it. sure, they are impaired to a lesser degree than those with higher support needs, but that doesn't mean you can just erase their struggles, y'know?

#sometimes i see posts that are like 'its unfair to say that autistic people have it easy and arent really disabled...' and go yes! exactly!#but then they'll continue like '...because not all autistic people have low support needs'#and i'm like. okay nevermind you dont understand this at all #i have comparatively mild autism (was diagnosed with aspergers back when that was still a thing)#and my autism has still significantly impacted and impaired my life #i think its important to acknowledge the huge range of experiences in the autistic community #and that many others have struggled much more than me #but that doesnt mean its all easy breezy for me and other lsn autistics yknow?#(i guess i would technically be considered medium support needs or something but that's because of my chronic illness not my autism)#i wish people would just. like. listen to other peoples experiences before just assuming that they know everything about their lives #ofc a huge part of this is also some lsn autistics distancing themselves from hsn people and pretending that they're not actually disabled #but not every lsn autistic is like that. and even the ones that are are usually (consciously or unconsciously) downplaying their symptoms #autism #actually autistic #actuallyautistic #this isn't really about the post i just reblogged btw it just reminded me of it #because some of the notes on it went in that direction

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five-thousand-loaves-of-bread · 18 days

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don’t exactly love going around define & police what is & isn’t high needs autism but some you all “this character/shows/etc is high needs autism representation” and show is people who can live independently/ semi independently & go to community without supervision & bunch examples can only think of iADL examples & not autism inherent symptoms bc no brain right now

like can we collectively acknowledge be visibly awkward & “weird” speech pattern & low/cant mask… not exclusive to high needs autism. n not all of what high needs autism mean. right. like can we

we know low support & level 1 autistics can struggle w masking… right

#🍞.txt #seen many low/no/can’t mask lsn or level 1 autistic say ‘hey we exist’ n don’t feel seen n like. yeah!!!!!

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decompose1 · 1 month

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u realized u just reblogged ai art right

1- i hadnt no

2- while i dont really want to rb ai art because of my ethical concerns with it, this is not an appropriate or ok way to approach me about a problem. you know that being unspecific and accusatory is just a weird argument starter, come on now. just let me know which post in the future. it's lucky enough that i was able to go back and look at urls & that one had an obvious one, but this isn't information i normally take in lol

#something something consider the way you interact with autistics tht arent lsn lol

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crowpunkcognitivedecline · 6 months

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this is a cripple punk post; ableds must tag reblogs with #i’m able bodied

stop calling ND people’s ableism against physdis folks “lateral ableism.” it’s not lateral.

the vast majority of physdis folks are ND. while ND people can absolutely be disabled, ND disability works and is experienced differently, and isn’t just “physdis but mental”

ND people’s ableism against crips isn’t “lateral.” it’s ableism with an excuse.

#DO NOT TAG AS “C SLUR”/“TW SLUR”#related: LSN autist’s ableism against HSN autists isn’t lateral #if there is an imbalance of privilege in the area it’s not fucking lateral #stop appropriating social justice terms to make it sound like we’re all on equal footing here because we fucking arent #cripple punk #crippunk #cpunk #ableism #anticrip ableism #lateral ableism #lateral oppression #sanism #autistic #actually autistic #neurodiversity #neurodivergent community

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autisticdreamdrop · 2 years

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Needing to stim is NOT bad.

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stardew-bajablast · 2 months

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the way a lot of y’all on this site hear “autism” and automatically assume whoever is speaking means “low support needs autism” is really weird and ableist. sorry it just is

#autism #actually autistic #low support needs #high support needs #lsn autism #hsn autism #ableism #star rambles

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lesbian-honey-lemon · 3 months

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Here is my problem with posts like these- the concept is sound. Autistic people *can* have all of these traits pictured. Autistic people can make eye contact, not be good at science, and understand emotions.

But all of these posts come off with the undertone that NOT having these pictured traits is the default, the standard, that autistics who don’t have these traits are talked about too much and that NOT having these traits is just stereotypical and bad. Those sentiments have been repeated far too often in the community for me to fully trust people who make posts like this one shown above. How can I know that they don’t REALLY mean to leave autistics who don’t have these traits, these “cute, good, more socially acceptable traits”, out of the conversation. How can I know they don’t think autistics who don’t fit this cutesy list are bad and stereotypical and should just shut up already so the cutesy autistics can look better to neurotypicals. Because it really does come off this way.

I didn’t read fiction at all until I was nine (I was forced to start reading it then) and didn’t enjoy it until I was twelve. I still only enjoy the few fandoms I know well and it is very hard to get into anything I’m not familiar with. My lifelong special interest is geology and has been since I was five. I have always been good at science, and although I have a vivid imagination and love art, I hate English class and can only make art for Big Hero 6 and the SCP Foundation because I know those fandoms well. I don’t make eye contact, and I have low empathy and struggle to read and understand the emotions of people I don’t know well. I have noise sensitivity so bad that I have almost given myself tinnitus playing music to cope. I couldn’t do dishes until I got myself rubber gloves, I can’t eat many “quick foods” such as instant and microwaveable foods because of texture issues.

I don’t fit most of those cutesy traits on the list. But, I barely ever see any positivity for MY traits, because the community sees me as the default, thinks I’m talked about enough and visible enough. There’s this undertone in all of these posts that us non-socially acceptable autistics are visible enough and we should just let high masking high empathy LSNs have the spotlight. And that would be fine if they didn’t also make the community completely inhospitable to us by shitting on people with low empathy, misusing the term nonverbal (which ABSOLUTELY pisses off actually nonverbal people and you’d know that if you actually listened to them), and refusing to talk about anyone who isn’t a cutesy high empathy high masking LSN. Apparently everyone else is accepted enough. Apparently people are aware of me already. If so, then where did my diagnosis run off to, huh?

#this is like half venting half discourse #of course it’s not all high empathy high masking lsns #but I am allowed to be fucking angry when all I see is stuff about them and how lovely and cool their traits are #where’s that energy for nonverbal autistics or autistics with intellectual disabilities or autistics with low empathy #where’s that energy for autistics with comorbidities other than ADHD like autistics with schizophrenia or cluster b disorders or OCD or DID #we won’t get anywhere if every other autistic is thrown under the bus to make high empathy high masking LSNs look better to neurotypicals #autism #autism spectrum disorder #actually autistic #autism discourse #asd #low empathy autism #actually low empathy

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lilqu33rboi · 2 months

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i will continue to say this until all of my fellow lsn autistics understand: we absolutely MUST focus on amplifying the voices of and supporting msn/hsn autistics! i will never stop following & reblogging posts from m/hsn autistics because some of us (lsn autistics) don't know how to get it together & realize that it isn't always about us! this doesn't mean i am trying to minimize our struggles or say that we don't have needs to be met because of course we do, but we also need to understand that just because we aren't in the spotlight 24/7 (which we are anyway when it comes to mainstream media but that's a topic for another day) doesn't mean that we get to overshadow m/hsn autistics who have needs that we shouldn't claim to understand because we aren't all the same. Just because we are all autistic doesn't mean that we can claim to understand the needs of someone who doesn't always share the same experiences as us.

#actually autistic #autism #asd #autism spectrum disorder #disability #disabled #lsn #low support needs #low support #support needs #thoughts #rant post #rant #ranting #complaining #negative #rambles #ramblings

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franchouchou · 15 days

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just want to put it out there that as a low/pretty much no empathy autistic, some of yall are way too comfortable with saying nasty things about those of us who lack empathy. we exist too. there's a reason it was a stereotype in the first place.

#actually autistic #low empathy #no empathy #medium support needs #i would go on a long rant about how lsn autistics tend to drown out literally everyone else in the community #and how i think this is related to the whole 'uhm ACTUALLY we have a LOT of empathy unlike those heartless monsters' argument #but due to brain fog i cant think of right words to do so. and ppl would probably misinterpret me anyway #anyway! remember we exist and include us in your conversations about autism thanks!!!

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five-thousand-loaves-of-bread · 10 months

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am have to late autism regression that began late adolescence, but am don’t have “regressive autism.”

regressive autism is where child look develop normally, but at usually 15-30 months old, lose social skills, language & speech, and sometimes other skills, like motor skills and adaptive skills. this where before, child vocalizing babbling talking and interacting, and suddenly or slowly, stop talking stop responding to people (so no, it not “evil ableist parents ignore autism symptom🙃”). we no know why yet. also, child with regressive autism typically more severe symptom than child with non-regressive autism. [source]

even though many people here on tumblr seem have autism regression in teenage or early adult, “autistic regression” actually more common refer to this before-age-3 regression. other names include developmental regression. —which why when talk about own regression, typically on purpose add “late” autism regression. late autism regression is actually considered rare (whether because rarely studied rarely diagnosed, or actually rare in number, don’t know).

whether have late regression or not, need all be mindful that regressive autism & autism regression before 3 exist and not ignore or drown out it. need remember those with regressive autism, most won’t be able be here on tumblr talk about it, because well, they 3, it happen at 3. even if they older now, their severity of symptom mean many not able communicate about it or use social media. because of this, many people talk about this going to be parents of child with regressive autism.

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ICD-11 recognize both regression before 3 (what am talk about here with regressive autism) and after 3. ICD-11 diagnosis of autism have modifiers (DSM also do but a little different modifiers): comorbid disorder of intellectual development (aka intellectual disability), degree of functional language impairment, and “loss of previously acquired skills,” aka regression.

A small proportion of individuals with Autism Spectrum Disorder may present with a loss of previously acquired skills. This regression typically occurs during the second year of life and most often involves language use and social responsiveness. Loss of previously acquired skills is rarely observed after 3 years of age. If it occurs after age 3, it is more likely to involve loss of cognitive and adaptive skills (e.g., loss of bowel and bladder control, impaired sleep), regression of language and social abilities, as well as increasing emotional and behavioural disturbances.

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with either regression before 3 or after 3, include late adolescents regression, important to rule out all other causes. because other reasons that make look regression may be life threatening disorders.

regression also see in child disintegrative disorder (CDD), rett syndrome, and some others. they all a little different, timing, symptoms, etc.

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do not debate “severity” of autism language here. do not use this to self diagnose. do not use this to talk about parental trauma or debate autism parents & parents of autistics.

#believe or not have seen late/no dx LSN autistic say regressive autism no exist because it just parents ignore autism symptoms 🥰#actually autistic #actuallyautistic #autism #autistic #loaf screm

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enchanting-grom-fright · 14 hours

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i really fucking hate the side of some of my friends i’ve learned abt these past few months literally just bcs our class switched to one with a low masking / hsn autistic kid in our class

like i know they’d never make fun of him to his face

but i see them trying to exchange judgemental looks with me when he does smthing “cringe” or “annoying” as if that makes it any less ableist

and obviously i don’t humor that but they’re also hanging around kids who say some really out of pocket shit both to his face and literally any moment they can think to make more jokes bcs they for some reason find their existence so fucking funny

which my friends rnt doing at all just to be clear but they still laugh at the jokes. all the time. they still want to be around ppl who’s humor. is. literally. mostly. that. they r still hearing so many of those insults and jokes so. often. made directly to them yet they don’t do anything to discourage it like not even the minimum of ignoring it. it makes me wonder if they’ve started thinking them too

i genuinely don’t get it

#at the end of the day it’s not a relatively big deal #but it’s just so fucking weird that they’re like this. ik theyd never try to harm someone for being autistic but like. they know on some #level not to do this bcs when i bring it up they go quiet #and obviously (at least in my school) i hear ppl saying this type of stuff literally every schoolday #but it especially sucks to hear even as a high masking / lsn autistic from ur own friends once it becomes smthing u see #more days than not #yk #idk ik this is actually a reasonable thing to be upset abt but id hate to sound like i’m complaining #like i’m not the main target here bcs i am not reconizably autistic to most ppl i don’t think (though obviously it does affect me bcs it pu #even more pressure on me to mask which like hopefully if ur reading this yk why that’s horrible)#and i would never ever shit talk my friends just to be clear except they’re just yk doing shitty things this time #guys anyways sorry for the rants but yea #actually autistic #ableism

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bluehairmisfit · 6 months

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Autistic people of Tumblr, how does one know what support needs level they are?

#actually autistic #autistic #support needs #autism #ASD #like I mask a lot. I don’t really know how to unmask #but I just found out recently that high masking does not equal LSN???#I mask a lot but I’m not very good at it apparently #and I have no clue how to tell what level support needs I have and I don’t wanna infringe on anyone so I kinda wanna figure it out but???

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