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oh yes it's that time of year

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thinking about how when you experience a lot of shame in your formative years (indirectly, directly, as abuse or just as an extant part of your environment) it becomes really difficult to be perceived by other people in general. the mere concept of someone watching me do anything, whether it's a totally normal activity or something unfamiliar of embarrassing, whether I'm working in an excel spreadsheet or being horny on main, it just makes my skin crawl and my brain turn to static because I cannot convince myself that it's okay to be seen and experienced. because to exist is to be ashamed and embarrassed of myself, whether I'm failing at something or not, because my instinctive reaction to anyone commenting on ANYTHING I'm doing is to crawl into a hole and die. it's such a bizarre and dehumanizing feeling to just not be able to exist without constantly thinking about how you are being Perceived. ceaseless watcher give me a god damn break.

#oh boy #exvie tag #q

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Small Independent Deer Does Its Errands

#:) #art #q

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Sounds cool. I won't check it out.

Own this BCV Original.

#me n who #q

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Ruth Asawa (American, 1926-2013), Untitled (Persimmons), c.1970s-80s.Watercolor on paper, 14 × 17 in.

#art #q

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An addition to the saga of weird Elijah things during seders.

Transcript: a series of texts including a photo of a baby deer with spots peeking through a sliding glass door. A message follows saying “deer at the Seder”. The other person responds “Elijah?” In all caps.

#q

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Vintage Japanese Ceramic Stoneware Retro 1970s Mid-Century Coffee | Tea Pot Jug || SWtradepost - ebay

#q

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you may have seen achilles in his miserable blanket burrito but have you seen odysseus Sitting Like That while appealing to achilles in his miserable blanket burrito

achilles looking very "make him stop make him stop make him stop"

#achilles: blanket burrito #odysseus: hehe. my peanits #q

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“Women Holding Strange Creatures”, Quentin Blake for Vice, 2007

#might get this tattooed tbh i love it #art

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let’s settle this shit but do NOT reblog if you’re gonna be modest about it like a little BITCH. anyway privilege check tell me which ones apply to you: hot, funny, can dance, can do math, can spell, can drive, can cook

#funny/math/spell (when i am trying. not when texting)/drive/cook #q

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#wouldnt last an hour in the asylum where they raised me #(ymca soccer game days in the south) #polls

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i will die without routine. also this routine is killing me

#q

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if you pick me up ill be so mad but you better cuddle me . Figure it out

#what is there to figure out. if they are in the air they want to be supported

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I can't do that post that's like "why did you start following prev" bc I truly do not remember why I started following any of you guys. It's probably just because we were brothers in a past life

#almost certainly my mutuals are there for correct dragon age or daenerys opions. or queens thief #q

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#cmon. behold. #also ive decided if buffy found a lifting gym and made friends w megsquats it would fix her

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#q