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distort-opia · 9 months

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Hello! So I recently got into batman, and I’ve been slowly climbing my way up my reading list while also browsing through tumblr in search for metas about him, which is how I found your blog, and I really enjoy your metas!

I have a question though that won’t leave my mind, yet I also don’t want to stop my current reading list to jump into another series (JL), so I hope you don’t mind me asking this question to you instead 🙏

Basically, I’ve been wondering whether Bruce has opinions about Clark in relation to his self—Bruce’s self? So far from what I’ve read, Dick is (excuse me if the wording isnt exactly accurate, but just as a sums up) “the one that brings the light to Bruce’s darkness & the ideal self—the best of him”, whereas Joker is “the mirror to his self—the him that ‘what could have been’, the him who took different route”, and I wonder if there is a similar thinking/opinion about this self thing from him @ Clark too (like some sort of parallels)? I’m sorry if it sounds confusing 😅 Thank you!

Welcome to the fandom! Thank you for the kind words, glad you've enjoyed what meta I've put out. Hope you're having a fun time with Batman comics.

Oh Bruce definitely has opinions on Clark and Superman in general, in relation to himself. Though I have to make the note that in no way was Superman intended or built as a narrative foil for Batman's character, a "mirror self". Dick and Joker are characters who populated Batman's world from early on and were always meant to say something about the protagonist. Superman is a protagonist onto himself; he was created before Batman, and his popularity was actually a big factor contributing to Batman's creation. But that doesn't mean these two characters haven't grown together and influenced each other in a myriad of ways.

On a surface level, you've got the... grumpy one/sunshine one dichotomy. Superman is brightly colored and more emotional and fights in the light to bring people hope. Batman is enshrouded in darkness and stoically represses his emotions and fights in the night for justice and vengeance. One in the light, one in the shadows, one alien, one human, the "boy scout" and the "bad boy"... Even though they work together and are both on the side of good, these contrasts between Bruce and Clark are easily noticed by both others and themselves, and have led to conflicts on more than one occasion. But the way this translates in Bruce's head, to approach it from the angle you mentioned, is probably best summed up by the following pages... which I'm putting under a cut since this gets a bit long. Spoilers too I guess, for the Rebirth Batman run (if you haven't gotten to it yet).

Batman (2016) #36

"He's a better man than I am. [...] Who am I, compared to him?" And this is no way a new sentiment for Bruce:

Batman: Hush

Bruce doesn't see himself as a good person. He's capable of risking people's lives, of blackmail, lying, torture and manipulation, of unbelievable brutality and violence in the service of what he believes is his Mission. But he sees Clark as an inherently good person; as an ideal that he himself is not capable of ever reaching, of ever being. If I were to summarize only the projection aspect when it comes to Batman and Superman's dynamic, I'd say it's this one-- Superman is the hero Batman wishes he could be, but not one he'd ever try to become, because he believes himself fundamentally incapable of it. If as you said Dick is someone Bruce relates to and sees parts of himself in, but better (in trying to help Dick he retrospectively tries to help his child self), Clark isn't that. Superman is less of a mirror Bruce actively acts on, and more of a... negative. Clark is technically an alien, and yet in many ways he's more "human" than Bruce, having grown up with a loving family that Bruce wishes he had. Where Bruce tries to rise above the humanity he sometimes sees as weakness, both in emotional and physical terms, Clark is someone who's already "above" humanity, and yet yearns to be part of it. Moreso, Bruce envies Clark's sheer god-like power, but he knows that he doesn't have Clark's good character; that if he had this kind of unstoppable power, his need for complete control would drive him mad. Which actually happened one time, in Superman/Batman (2003) #53-56.

That being said, as is noticeable even in the pages above, this can result in Bruce putting Clark up on a pedestal, and idealizing him a bit too much, to the point of forgetting that Clark is a person too, with flaws and weaknesses. And not just that... the more ruthless and calculated side of Bruce never truly stops seeing Clark's power, both as something he can wield and something that can be turned against him (hence the hoarding of kryptonite and the contingency plans, in case Superman went bad). Perhaps Bruce's attitude more generally is illustrated best in this very recent moment:

Batman (2016) #128

Superman as Earth's greatest hero, and its greatest weapon. And Bruce is willing to risk his life to preserve that, because by comparison, he isn't these things. (And because Clark is his friend.)

#there's so much to their dynamic tbh. didn't delve too much into the more Superbat side of things but #this plays a part. they ARE best friends no matter what they say. but it was a complex journey to get there and it's still complicated #anyway. with the disclaimer that these are my personal thoughts of course #perhaps you'll have different interpretations as you make your way through canon #but I hope this was a fun read Anon!#asks #batman #bruce wayne #bruce wayne meta #superman #clark kent #my meta

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madsciencepottery · 1 month

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Hi!!!

I've recently been wanting to get into clay ✨stuff✨ for funsies, and I have absolutely no idea where to start and I spent a good chunk of time googling and learned pretty much nothing because I got overwhelmed!! What a day.

Anyways I've been asking around and I have a few questions and you seem to know what you're doing, so -

-what are the differences between clays? I understand some need to be fired in a kiln (which I do not casually have laying around my house unfortunately), some need to be baked, and some can just air dry??? But that's really about as far as I got before getting lost.

- which clay is usually best for what kind of projects??? I'm thinking I want to do just some Small Things like key trays or pencil/pen holders or etc etc.

- are there any specific tips/tricks I should be using to make it slightly easier to work with, or any specific care instructions?

thank you!!!

Hi there! I don't claim to be an expert but hopefully I can help you get started?

Now clays: ceramic clays need to be fired in a kiln and are the most durable. For your heavy-duty projects (vessels that need to hold water/be in contact with heat) this is your best bet.

Air-dry clay can mimic the look and feel of ceramic clay if you just want the aesthetic, but are usually paper-based and not nearly as durable. Flammable, and not waterproof unless you coat it with something. Can be good for decorative projects.

Polymer clay: plastic-based and mimics a lot of different materials, this is the kind you bake in your oven. Comes in many colors, semi-durable when baked, so this may be the clay for you! Each brand comes with its own set of drawbacks/advantages, so my recommendation is to get an idea of what you want to make first and then see which brand fits best (some might bake harder but are harder to condition, etc.) I mostly work with sculpey so I can't speak to every kind, but probably the best advice I can give is to get a little and just play around with it. Learning the feel of a material is not something you can read over the internet, and the way I have learned the most is to jump in and make mistakes as I go.

I hope this has helped in some small way, I'm always nervous about giving advice, lol

#asks #asks from such nice folks

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stillness-in-green · 3 months

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Project Update/Survey of Interest: The AFO Retcon Essay

Having cleared out the inbox, I thought I'd let everyone know where I am on one of the big projects I've been alluding to for a long while now, the big meta post/essay arguing that the possession plot (and therefore AFO as primary endgame villain) is, in so many words, a big stupid retcon. That essay is - for reasons I'll get into shortly - on the brink of a major change in focus, so I'd also like to gauge how much interest people have in its potential new form. Because it would be another huge one, make no mistake.

(Hit the jump.)

So, I recently started dabbling with a new word processor program and thought I'd try learning the ropes with the retcon essay; I then spent the better part of two weeks combing through chatlogs and my blog archive trying to compile all the evidence I'd want to consider to make that argument. Two nights ago, I looked at the list I had - almost fifty bullet points! - and had the horribly demoralizing realization that...

...You guys, I just don't think I believe it anymore.

Now, that's not to say I've come around on the possession plot, because I definitely haven't! Rather, my trust in Horikoshi as a writer has been so badly eroded by the state of the writing in the endgame that I no longer think even the earlier material is reliable evidence for where the story was going.

To pick the most prominent example, I always regarded AFO telling Best Jeanist at Kamino that his quirk "wouldn't suit Tomura" as one of my strongest pieces of evidence that the possession plot had not been in the cards at that time. After all, who in hell cares what quirks would or would not suit Tomura if AFO's plan, as stated in Chapter 380, was that he would wholly subsume Tomura's will?

Now, however - and Chapter 380 is a big part of this, too! - I look back on that moment and just think, wearily, "Was that ever true, or was Horikoshi just lying to us already, and the only difference between then and now is that back then the lies could hold for hundreds of chapters, whereas now they're revealed within a matter of pages?"

A chat friend letting me vent suggested that perhaps the line was just intended to foreshadow Shigaraki getting All For One (and therefore all the quirks held within it) and Horikoshi just didn't think through all the implications AFO's phrasing had on how that plot was going to go. That may be true, and it's a more generous read than I could muster at the time, but the end result is the same: If I can't trust that the writing was ever an accurate reflection of the characters and their intentions, I can't in good faith construct an argument relying on that writing.

What I think I can do, however, if people are interested, is broaden the overall thrust to something much bigger than just AFO.

I'm currently toying with the idea of a treatise-in-four-parts about the problems in the endgame. Each part would cover one major branch of related issues - they might need to be broken down into sub-parts themselves, if they run long enough! The whole thing would likely be much longer and more involved than my chapter posts; think something more like the PLF mass arrest essay. Following are my current ideas for how those four parts would fall out, as well as some example talking points for each:

Part 1: Shigaraki and the PLF. Would cover Shigaraki as a villain and what he and the forces he'd amassed circa the end of My Villain Academia stood to bring to the endgame, both ideologically and tactically. Would also cover where they actually wound up and some considerations as to why. Example Subpoints: Demanding accountability from Hero Society rather than just focusing blame on singular evils; Shigaraki as representative of all previous Villains; the MLA's shift in portrayal between MVA and the endgame; the ludicrous string of nerfs Toga was subjected to; whether the MLA was only ever intended to be a mass of numbers to whittle down the equally massive numbers of the Heroes or whether they were reduced to that after poor reader reception.

Part 2: All For One's Impact. Would focus on the sharp drop in moral complexity AFO both suffered himself compared to his pre-Tartarus characterization and inflicted on the endgame both himself and with the caliber of minions he brought to the story. Example Subpoints: AFO's inconsistent characterization; the moral reductiveness of the Demon Lord as endgame Villain; AFO and Yoichi's personal history; Vestige mechanics; the impact of AFO's inconsistency on Ujiko's portrayal; the Sekoto Peak Problem; the characterization and handling of the Tartarus escapees.

Part 3: Team Hero Is The Fucking Worst. Would focus on the multitudinous problems with the presentation and methodologies of the Heroes in the endgame. Might be two parts if it gets long enough that I decide to split it up into, like, one part on the adults/Pro Heroes and one on the kids or something. Example Subpoints: The story's bad faith attempts to portray agents of government authority as scrappy, determined underdogs; why it's impossible to believe that the current heroic cast will be able to enact a satisfying resolution to all the structural problems the story has raised; That Stupid Fucking Mech Fight; the constant refusal to let consequences stick to the Heroes; the way the story both undercuts and oversells Deku as a protagonist, and the impact that has on the broader narrative; One For All and more Vestige Mechanics; The Problem of Hawks; the hospital riot; the Todoroki family's inaction.

Part 4: Other Issues. A catch-all area for anything else I trip over that doesn't fit in any of the categories above, or problems of a more meta-narrative sort. Very Preliminary Example Subpoints: The lazy portrayal of civilian characters; meta-narrative examples of the unreliability of BNHA's late-stage writing, from simple errors overlooked in the highly demanding grind of Shonen Jump serialization to the much more damning abuse of the reader's expectations of the comic medium; idk probably lots of other stuff, I Have Many Problems.

That said, I now have to ask, how interested are you all in a project like that? A fair amount of it would be recycled from my chapter posts, but obviously it would cover stuff I never got to in those, and would be able to be written with more hindsight (especially if it's written mostly or entirely after the series ends!), as opposed to the constant problem of reacting to the story week-to-week.

I basically stopped writing the chapter posts for reasons of incessant negativity, and obviously, this would be more of that, but I mind the negativity a lot less when it's A) able to be more comprehensive and focused than meandering and piecemeal and B) in the form of a large project I can work on as I have the energy for it rather than a brand new project every single week. And, as I trust stuff like MVA In Memoriam and On Heteromorphobia make clear, I do like the idea of putting together a good, comprehensive, easy-to-reference tract on all those problems, as opposed to just letting my issues remain scattered across multiple years of chapter thoughts and bnha critical tags!

That said, it's a big project, and I do vent about these issues pretty constantly with chat and irl friends, so if there's not much interest from followers here, I would not find it hard to just let the whole thing go and turn my eyes to less intimidating fare instead.

(Current other projects include the usual roster of BNHA fic, another mid-length meta piece in the mode of the BNHA vs. Helck comparison from a while back, this time on Mamoru Hosoda's Belle, and a horrible temptation to try and write something thoughtful and even-handed about demons in Frieren: Beyond Journey's End to combat the reductive-ass takes on both sides of the argument I've been seeing all over the internet since its anime started. Also, every week I go without seeing a single damn MachtxGluck fanfic on AO3 is a week I get closer to trying to figure out a way into writing it myself.)

Do let me know! Also, feel free to chip in with anything you'd like to see me specifically talk about in an endgame analysis!

#bnha #my (prospective) writing #bnha critical in the same way the last verse of the cellblock tango is about artistic differences #i could be the bigger person here but #bnha indeed has it coming

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t1meslayer · 18 days

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Busy with important family events over the next couple of days, and so I thought it would be good to get a day-and-date release for this Debrief on the latest entry in my Sapphic Valley series, "How You Get The Girl." Be sure to read the story before jumping in!

Did you do it? Did you read the story?

Alright, I'm trusting you. Go ahead and hit that 'Keep Reading' button you scamp.

It only seems appropriate to start this Debrief off by addressing the elephant in the room. I haven't posted anything in over a month, and "By Moonlight" came about a month after its predecessor, the conclusion to "Stone-Cold Lovers."

Work, naturally, has been a major factor.

You can see me talk about that almost two weeks ago in this Tumblr post I made about writing in a coffee shop, which came weeks after I actually started writing during a trip to a friend's house.

===

Side note:

Just wanted to take a moment and acknowledge my beautiful Haley and Emily keychains. My friend who's responsible for the affairs of one ghostly farmer named Jizzabelle (Gisabelle to the laymen) got them for me! Only appropriate after I commissioned some art of her and Abigail.

Emily was my first Stardew wife, and Haley currently holds the biggest place in my heart. They make a lovely duo!

And I'll avoid any sister-wife jokes

===

While I've had some other projects like Zine writing to take care of, work and life can't explain the full absence.

The best way I can think to explain things is that:

I had the general writer's block, and

Despite the best intentions and advice of my irl friends and online pals like @alchemicallymoon and @duelbraids, I couldn't force myself to "break" that block by just... Writing something else.

This is entirely the result of my own psychosis. I have a tendency to carefully plot things out and impose a timetable that really doesn't need to exist. When I feel the cause is righteous enough, it's hard to get around that. In this case, I knew I needed to get my poll-winning idea out after dawdling for holidays like Valentine's Day, and then I knew I only wanted to post one more story before jumping on a very special event for my upcoming 30th AO3 post.

Thus, here we are: arbitrarily forcing myself into a spiral of writer's block misery because of a silly promise on Tumblr and my own sense of ordered chaos.

At the very least, this meant it's coming out not long after my AO3 pal InsertACatchyPennameHere also emerged from the woodwork to tell me they're working on something INSPIRED by my four-person friend group farm adaptations.

Much love to them, wherever they may be.

I'll probably start writing more eclectically now that my shoulders are unweighed, but don't expect my next publication to hit until I'm finished working on teasing the big event. All you Pokemon fans better get hype!

And oh how sweet this publication feels. Between my great set of recent ceramics, the figure drawing class I've been attending, and creative writing, I've felt more fulfilled than ever.

You're here to talk about Stardew, though. So let us talk.

This idea began less with any one event as it did a desire to advance the Alexis/Haley relationship, and Haley's characterization in particular. It was always going to end with watercolor painting reference, but 2 Willow Lane was what I really wanted to dig into.

As I see it, a lot of what keeps people invested in Stardew when its comfy vibes becoming routine is the air of mystery in Eric Barone's worldbuilding. Haley and Emily's parents being some world-traveling duo who left their home in the siblings' care for who knows how long (and who knows how many times over their lifetime) really piqued my interest. So much so that the new writing challenge I set for myself in "How You Get The Girl" was crafting a particularly long set of descriptions that emphasize how overwhelming the parents' influence feels — without creating an impenetrable wall of text.

Hopefully I succeeded in that. Let me know!

I tried to include some vaguely real world-adjacent references into that description of the house, as happens with the magical-realism world of Stardew Valley. For example:

The computer sitting next to their bonsai tree is an iMac G3, the kind of old 'futuristic' tech that my dad loves!

A Speedwell refrigerator is based on even more vintage tech, the Mayflower fridge, but named after a different ship ridden by Pilgrims coming to America.

That city that the family visited in an old photograph with a "monument of arching, interlocking steel" is, of course, Paris — with the statue bookends referencing any number of statues in the Louvre.

Haley's FAD magazine could be referencing any number of publications, but Vogue is probably the closest analogue to what I imagine her reading.

Furthermore, I took some notes on describing the home's layout off of my sister's apartment building, and I asked my bestie @trybard for input on what kind of hanging plant should be used in the transitional hallway. Hanging pothos, philodendron, and spider plants were the three options provided, and my response was appropriate:

They know so much about plants.

Go bug them about it.

I drew on other friends' knowledge to help decorate the house. Specifically, I asked one of my witchiest friends what kinds of protective wards someone like Emily would leave around doorways and windows. She had... A lot of reference material.

I picked Hazel given it purportedly "protects against evil; encourages abundance and inspiration." I also picked Amethyst as one of Emily's loved gifts, one that purportedly "absorbs negative energy, promotes harmony."

My witchy friend is the same one who provided the TikTok that I referenced in my advertisement post:

Perhaps the most important thing about 2 Willow Lane was the recurring motif of Barbie's Dream House.

As a surface-level reference, I think the groundwork is clear. Blondie's love of fashion and general queen bee demeanor fits comparisons to Barbie well, and she lives in a big ol' house full of stuff. We all saw Greta Gerwig's Barbie movie last year. It's still in the cultural zeitgeist.

I'm hip with the kids.

Yet, early on I also tried to make it clear that if this is a "dream" house, it's neither Haley's nor Emily's dream. Haley is a Barbie in that stereotypical sense, but also there's much to be mined from the analogy of a sort of powerless doll in an immutable house, constrained by social obligation to her family rather than literal plastic and stickers.

The cold open of Jodi and Sam was meant to stand alone, but in execution I also think drawing Kent's absence into the conversation makes for a more thematically rich comparison to these sisters who appear to have themselves more put together.

My beta reader said this wound up being one of my stronger stories because of how all of that intertwined, which I appreciated given how down on myself I was following the whole writer's block thing.

But also.

Also.

Alexis gets to be horny. She's hitting on lonely MILFs and watching girls shake their asses to the tune of bad reality TV.

We love a buff dommy mommy farm girl in this house.

Haley is probably horny too, she just doesn't realize it yet. For now I think it's fun enough to play into her being coy about building excuses for Alexis to come over, and then getting incensed when Emily barges in on their private time meant to learn more about this farm girl she just can't get out of her head.

===

Fun fact:

Every story in this series is named after a Taylor Swift song, but I know next-to nothing about her discography. All of them are suggestions by my friend whose house I was at when starting this story — the same one who controls Gardenia on the farm.

While I went with "How You Get The Girl," her alternative suggestion was "The Man."

===

All that w|w talk aside, I also want to give Sam the loveable idiot a shoutout. Had to do a fair bit of research into how skateboards are constructed for his failed ollie, and I slipped in a reference to shitty old technology that's exclusively for my beta reader to enjoy.

I also tried doing some agricultural research to figure out how the folks at Kevin Farm could have grown cucumbers so there'd be a jar of legitimate pickles... But that was getting too in the weeds.

Insert laugh track here

Decided to just go with pickled artichoke hearts to save everyone a lot of trouble.

And where does "Kevin Farm" come from, you may be asking yourself. Or the fabulous "Kevin's Special" with its definitely not innuendo tagline.

That story will have to wait for another day, my friends.

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pinkfadespirit · 1 month

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WIP Wednesday

I've been jumping around between so many different projects lately that it almost feels like I'm never going to get anything finished. The most recent thing has been a return to this Handers modern AU fic I started a while ago. I wasn't sure if I was ever going to share it when I started it but I've been feeling less shy about it recently.

I couldn't find a part in the most recent scenes I've been working on that would stand alone without context but here's something from an earlier chapter with some Anders and Jowan friendship. Because I just think they should be friends :)

"Do you remember back in school this one time we were all round at Surana's place? We did that weird... ritual, I guess you could call it." Jowan was clearly thrown by the question, not that Anders was surprised. It had been years since he'd thought about that day. The more surprising thing was probably that he'd even remembered it after so long. "The soulmate thing?" Jowan asked doubtfully as he took a seat at the other end of the sofa from Anders. "Yeah," said Anders, almost regretting even bringing it up because it really was so stupid that he was even thinking about it. "We called upon the spirits or whatever to tell us—" "What our soulmate's first words to us would be. I remember. Wow, I haven't thought about that in a while." "Do you think it was real?" He felt embarrassed just asking but he was fairly sure Jowan wouldn't mock him for it the way Surana would. "Wait," Jowan's eyes widened. "Was it her? The woman you stayed with?" "What, Marian? No. No it was... someone else. Someone I doubt I'll ever see again." "Oh." Jowan seemed disappointed by that. It was sort of sweet, how genuinely invested he seemed in Anders' happiness. "And it's not as though I believe in all that," he said, as though it hadn't been his idea to even try the stupid ritual back then. "It's got to be a coincidence. It just got me thinking." He remembered it clearly, even after more than fifteen years. Anders had been so sure he knew what the words would be, that he'd already met the person he was meant to be with. Then the board had spelled out something different, the same words that tall beared man had spoken to him: 'who the fuck are you?' and his friends had dissolved into peals of laughter as Anders' heart deflated because Karl was sweet and shy, and the first time they'd spoken had been when Anders had dropped one of his exercise books on the way to his maths lesson earlier that day. Karl had called him back, not wanting him to get in trouble with Ms Rylock, who had a real knack for making her students cry over that sort of thing. He had the prettiest blue eyes Anders had ever seen, and he'd been convinced it was love at first sight. It had to be a coincidence, or a joke Surana had played on him, because it was a common enough phrase, and because it was exactly the sort of thing Surana would do.

tagging: @goth-surana, @thedastrash, @salsedine, @ringneckedpheasant, @pyritefes2, @un-shit-yourself, @pappykins, @rusted-pipe-of-wisdom, @lordnochybaty, @spicywarl0ck, @illusivesoul, @sweetmage

I'd love to see what you've all been working on! Though of course there's no pressure if you don't feel like it. If you'd like to be added to the taglist then let me know. Or feel free to post your own WIP and tag me in it!

#wip wednesday #anders #jowan

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and-a-pidgey-in-a-wepear-tree · 1 month

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good [insert time of day here] i realised i never thought to ask you amid my delight of you being the most interactive follower i have that isnt an irl friend do YOU have ocs or blorbos. i wish to know. for reasons.

OH hello yes thank you for asking!!! I have several OCs but most of the time I simply Do Not Explain on here; I have lots of ideas and doodles but I make it mostly for myself and don't think to share — doesn't mean I don't want to tho! exhibit A: this absolutely massive post I'm about to make lmao. putting it under a read more bc Oh Boy, the floodgates have been opened

most of my OCs are for two different projects I have: The Visitors and my D&D Dark Star Campaign.

The Visitors is just a lil worldbuilding project I've been chewing on for.... oh wow, over a decade at this point??? I love all the OCs I have in there very very much, but they're definitely never intended to go in an actual story, I just enjoy the speculative biology and character / world building process.

Val is one of my oldest OCs, and she's changed SO MUCH over the years! nowadays, she's a sort of insect/dinosaur mashup alien who uses gravity warping magic and a very large axe to hunt demons. a huge issue for magic users of her species is keeping cool, as magic generates heat and can literally cook you from the inside out, so you'll notice the multiple vent-like spiracles across her body for this purpose. she was born blind and so relies heavily on her best friend, Django, to be her eyes and keep her safe. fortunately, Django has Too Many Eyes. he's a dragon genetically engineered by those in Val's species to be the perfect vessel for storing and releasing massive amounts of mirror-based magic. this kind of magic gives him many abilities, including seeing around corners, creating illusions, or multiplying attacks when applied in different ways, and he acts as Val's seeing-eye dragon. in battle, she likes to get up in the action while he holds back and gives her cues on what's happening, only jumping in himself if she's in major trouble. she's very friendly and excitable, and loves to get into the culture of whatever planet they're visiting, while he's more interested in observing and snooping. there's a lot of espionage and hijinks.

these are some of my most recent sketches of them, tho I'm sure the designs will changes in the future. specific colors don't matter at all, it's all about vibes! not pictured in the halfway colored one is Val's big iridescent black cape thing that has a slit down the middle for her rigid tail, nor her weird arms since I wanted to figure out where the torso vents could go.

Duke is another Visitor who visits planets and solves problems, but his path to get there was a whole lot different! I made him up as a coping mechanism when I was 12, and I'm still very fond of him.

he started life as a human video game speedrunner and modder prodigy. in a "The Devil Went Down to Georgia" situation, a devil (very distinct from demons!) struck a deal with him, challenging his gaming abilities with his soul as the stakes. he won despite the devil's cheating, but that's where the resemblance to the song ends. in this world, a devil winning your soul allows them to fuse with you and gain total control over your body, mind, and actions; but if YOU win, the control is reversed! and like any 14 year old who suddenly has the power to rival minor gods and a chaotic creature living in their head.... he goes off the rails for a while. Val and Django eventually find him and help him cope. his powers include electricity, glitching reality, flailing his glaive around, and being a menace to evil overlords.

you can't see it very well in this picture, but his eyes and the segments between his tail glow lime green! I'm not a fan of drawing clothes, but in my head he's relatively fashionable for a teenager and refuses to wear anything other than black. also, he decided to tell me he was trans a couple years ago, thanks for letting me know buddy 😂

my other project does actually get to see the light of day, if very slowly — I'm running a homebrew D&D campaign for my irl friends called the Dark Star Campaign! none of em use tumblr so WHEEEE I get to post all the spoilers I want! there's a kinda staggering amount of lore behind it and a ton of minor OCs, but the two I rotate in my head the most are Anya the Timekeeper and The Master, aka Armageddon.

Anya the Timekeeper is a chronomancy lich from an alternate universe! she used to help Armageddon travel the multiverse and gain power, but she's decided she's tired of being evil, and now hides in a mansion on a tropical island where she breeds dinosaurs for fun. though she's now very determined to help the party, they'll eventually have to kill her past self to prevent a paradox. her familiar is a little archaeopteryx named Trix who steals hats!

(I commissioned this art from @/goodlouse a while ago! highly recommend checking out his blog!!)

Armageddon is the BBEG and he's SO EVIL and SO MUCH FUN. he's an ancient amethyst dragon who, up until a while before the campaign's beginning, was steadily finding alternate universe versions of himself, killing them, and eating their souls to gain Unlimited Power™. unfortunately, his partner in time (hah) Anya told him to fuck off, so the quest for Unlimited Power™ has been kinda slow lately. fortunately, a D&D campaign started, and he cheated his way into existing at the players' table as The Master! my players can ask to talk to him sometimes, and I'll put on a mask of his head I made specifically for this purpose — very useful for not breaking character when the character is supposed to literally be the one sitting at the table talking to the players. I don't try to hide the fact that he's evil and they all know it, the fun is in giving them little hints and tidbits of lore to munch on. right now he's being very docile and helpful but things will get very very interesting eventually as more of his nature and plan is revealed..... =)

I'm still playing around with what he looks like as The Master, but I really like this recent design I did. his eye glows dark and menacing. I haven't found a design for his dragon form I'm really pleased with yet tho :/

okay wow thanks again for the ask, I have many many ideas in my head and it felt pretty nice to get em out!!

#ough!! many thoughts!!#lemon generator #the visitors #dark star campaign #fair warning: delving into those tags might be completely incomprehensible #I have fun here on tumblr.com #d&d #oh also #anya the timekeeper

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leverage-ot3 · 4 months

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I was tagged by my buddy and old siren (freeform) mutual @imaginejolls for this ask game!

Star Sign(s): Sagittarius sun, Aquarius moon, Capricorn rising

Favorite Holidays: halloween :3

Last Meal: my mom's cajun beef stew with rice pilaf and a roll

Current Favorite Musician: I've been listening to a lot of noah kahan recently (vermont represent), but I also adore hozier, gracie abrams, lizzie mcalpine, phoebe bridgers, etc. I've never been the same since I was told my taste in music was yallternative. I also love lil nas x and found a new musician through tiktok that goes by brye that is really good

Last Music Listened To: the playlist I listen to the most, especially for sleep: immaculate fall vibes (technically the name of the playlist is just a bunch of the artists featured in it but the description is immaculate fall vibes). my most recent song was save me by noah kahan

Last Movie Watched: this is so embarrasing but I watched the meg with my dad yesterday lmao. I have a weakness for stupid monster movies (we used to watch the shittiest syfy movies together when I was in hs. the shittier the better). I thought he'd like it because jason statham but he was meh about it

Last TV Show Watched: last one I was invested in was the new episode of percy jackson, but I did watch a little bit of that polish show high water on netflix the other day which seemed interesting

Last Book/Fic Finished: god I actually haven't been reading fic for a hot minute which is really surprising. probably my reread of of the northmost winds and skies by @jjackfrost. wasn't in the crossover fandom until earlier this year but actually adore that pairing. this is now my comfort longfic (+400k). it's so good, I read it and I wasn't even in the fandom at the time and it was amazing!!! all the characters are written so well, the voices and pov are great, the worldbuilding and storyling is amazing! I've gushed in the comments before but ugh I love it so so much. inject this into my mf veins

Last Book/Fic Abandoned: I don't really abandon fics, I just wait for them to get updated again. as for books, I really tried to get into loveless by alice oseman because aroace rep but I couldn't really get into it :/

Currently Reading: nothing at the moment (not going to list all the fics I'm waiting for updates for because I can't remember them all and the ones I can remember would take up like multiple pages lol)

Last Thing Researched for Art/Writing/Hyperfixation: ooo this is hard. technically speaking I've been hyperfixated on playing animal crossing so the most recent thing I looked up for that was what treasure islands were lmao

Favorite Online Fandom Memory: oooo I'm not sure actually? I really love having mutuals even if we don't talk. I also really enjoy when people engage with my posts and appreciate my tags and aus. I like sharing my thoughts and ideas with you guys and it's so heartwarming and validating when y'all enjoy it right back

Favorite Old Fandom You Wish Would Drag You Back In/Have A Resurgence: I agree with jolly, I miss siren dearly. can they just do a leverage in like five years and retcon the last season? thanks

Favorite Thing You Enjoy That Never Had an Active or Big "Fandom" but You Wish It Did: probably some of the kdramas I've watched. I adored the guest on netflix but there's no fandom. I really REALLY wanted some fix-it fics for the ending of my name but there weren't any because the fandom was too small :(

Tempting Project You're Trying to Rein In/Don't Have Time For: so many things that I jump between (the adhd of it all lmao). I really would like to make a leverage ot3: are they queer video essay and I have some stuff typed up BUT I work in the healthcare field and I'm really hesitant of putting myself on video because when you work in this field it can be weird if clients or employers find your channel. so that's technically on hold for privacy reasons rn. I also really want to learn how to sew and make clothes and my roommate has even offered to help (they used to do competitive cosplay) but I'm just very unmotivated. I want to get back into witchy things but don't have the mental energy to invest in that other than appreciating my stones

tagging 10 moots but anyone can play!!!: @leverageclips @all-things-breathing @digitaldiscipline @peachyteabuck @vampirewalterskinner @buzzmcnab @sidras-tak @my-beloved-lakes @kajaono @suddenrundown

#imaginejolls #ask games #jackie talks #about me #mine #not leverage #jjackfrost if you're seeing this ily #sorry if this is a little long I suffer from I Can't Shut Up Disease

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respectthepetty · 2 years

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Hiya! What BL series would you recommend the most? So far, I've loved watching KinnPorsche (it's THE best!!), I Told Sunset about You, Cutie Pie & Bad Buddy. I also got into To My Star because of you, so cheers for that!

Anyway, I would love to watch more shows but I find it a bit hard to navigate because there's so many (and no offense, but some of which I initially started watching ended up being quite lame imo), so I would love to hear about your favs! Thanks in advance if you decide to reply. Have a lovely day/night wherever you are x

I have had this question several times over the past few months, but yours has been, by far, the kindest ask, so I'll answer now:

You don't want my trash recommendations.

So many others on here do it better, like @absolutebl! They have entire spreadsheets to break down preferences while I have five rules:

Don't bury the gay (MANDATORY!)

Be gay. Do crime! aka "Eff the police" (literally and figuratively)

I'm a messy bi, and I'll cry if I want to

Adulting is hard like my sexual attraction for you

Vice Vers(a) - Flipping the norms and changing dynamics

If a show gives me two out of four (since I will never allow a show to Killing Eve me again!), I'm going to fight random people AND their unborn kiddos in the street for it. Case & point:

HIStory 4: Close to You (2021, 10 episodes, Taiwan - 9/10) - I loved all of. Not some parts. Not only one of the couples. No! ALL. OF. IT! Every couple. Every situation. Including the stepbrothers relationship and the whole ridiculous top/bottom conversations. LOVED IT! It had the messy factor that others only aspire to achieve.

Taiwan has a tight hold on passionate men in sweatpants and a basic shirt down, and for that, I'm grateful!

Now that you know this is my floor, hopefully you understand that like my fave, Marie Kondo...

I was raised on telenovelas and soap operas, so if an evil twin kidnaps the protagonist then sleeps with him and has a child who is given up to an orphanage only to grow up and fall in love with his rich (unknown to him) brother and uses witchcraft to give the rival love interest amnesia, I'd be happily sitting every week to witness it with no qualms. Who am I to judge?! Makes sense to me!

Which means I don't LOVE some dramas even though they are great because my basic rules don't apply, the messiness is missing, or they will be too tough to rewatch:

Bad Buddy (7/10) because I wanted one of them to snap, crackle, and pop off at their parents for passing on generational trauma. Also, being in love with Bad Bunny yet trying to say this title was too difficult for my brain.

I Told Sunset About You (8/10) is rude and feels like a personal attack. You've seen it, so you know what I'm writing about. We don't speak about the sequel.

Semantic Error (9/10) hurt because anyone who has been in a group project knows the pain that the lead felt, yet it tried to convince us that he was in the wrong. Team No Group Assignment!

Cherry Magic's (8/10) second couple made me irrationally upset. Cats can bring people together, but these two? Really?! Cats are better than this street dancing moment!

Gameboys' (7/10) whole plot of the dad going out to look for the son and catching COVID was...yeah, no. And if the lead said "baby" ONE MORE TIME, I was going to make like a balloon in a toddler's hand and POP!

We Best Love 1 & 2 (8/10) gave us a five year time jump between the first and second part, and if it weren't for that *excellent* drunk moment, I would have stopped watching it and stored part two in the horrible-sequels-we-don't-speak-about pile.

But a man plotting from the age of ten to manipulate his whole family into accepting him sleeping with his stepbrother (HIStory 4 - 9/10), I fully support.

Therefore, you don't want what I'm peddling. Unless you do...

Trying to spotlight more recent ones because they will be easier to find

Be gay. Do crime: Too focused on one a**hole to notice the many plot holes.

Manner of Death (2020, 14 episodes, Thailand - 7.5/10) - A story of two men trying to have sex while EVERYONE around them is being killed. Oh, and then there is a cactus and a baby murderer horribly fighting his feeling for the smartest/dumbest guy in the town.

KinnPorsche (2022, 14 episodes, Thailand - 8/10) - A story about a family that is determined to dickmatize the first person who is kind to them, which you already watched, so you know they succeed.

Eff the Police: Tend to have issues finishing, but always a fun ride *pun intended*.

Not Me (2022, 14 episodes, Thailand - 7.5/10) - Literally, eff the police...but also, figuratively.

HIStory 3: Trapped (2019, 10 episodes, Taiwan - 8/10) - If we can't avoid the cops, sleep with them, so at least we can have a good character witness.

Messy Bi: There will be tears. Lots and lots of tears.

Love Mechanics (2020 and remake in 2022, 4 episodes/10 episodes, Thailand - 7/10, remake 8/10) - Polyamory is the answer, but the characters refuse to share.

Hello, Stranger (2020, 8 episodes, Philippines - 7.5/10) - A jock decides flirting with a guy is easier than actually doing his portion of the group project. The movie sequel is not on this level.

Adulting is Hard: The angst is strong, but the chemistry is stronger.

To My Star (2021, 9 episodes, South Korea - 9.5/10) - When being a big star is too difficult, stop showing up for work, crash at someone else's house, and pop his pimples. To My Star 2 is not on this level but still brought the chemistry, so if you didn't watch, do it.

He's Coming To Me (2019, 8 episodes, Thailand - 8/10) - Life is hard, but the afterlife is harder, so pester a kid for a decade until he decides to solve murders. The way the main's sexuality is handled is perfect.

Vice Vers(a): The confessions are ALWAYS a 10!

Old Fashion Cupcake (2022, 5 episodes, Japan - 9.5/10) - When in love with a boss, walk a delicate line of being the best employee while letting him know exactly the eight ways you can blow hi...his mind...with your mo...monumental organization ski.. Oh eff it him!

My Beautiful Man (2021, 6 episodes, Japan - 9/10) - Just an ordinary man who wants to be loved and the guy who wants to worship him in every way possible.

DNA Says Love You (2022, 12 episodes, Taiwan - 8/10) - The audience knows the whole time what is happening, but has no idea what is actually happening. Is it a ghost story? Is it about a soul reincarnating? Is this about amnesia? Nope. Well, actually...yeah, still no.

I have a lot more, but this is already too long.

All in all, embrace what you like. If you like a certain aspect of show, latch on to it and explore others that showcase that particular plot device. Also, don't be ashamed of what you like. Even if others think it's lame, if you like it, then I love it. Believe me, if China had finished Addicted, there be a lot more people living in glass houses keeping quiet instead of judging us because some guys in the mafia actually do bad things.

#bl drama #history 4: close to you #manner of death #old fashion cupcake #dna says love you #love mechanics #not me the series #history 3: trapped #hello stranger #he's coming to me #to my star #too many to tag

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void-inked-pen · 2 years

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What’s your take on the current WB situation right now(that being the constant cancellations of animated content, shutting down studios like Cartoon Network, or erasing stuff from HBO MAX, not even allowing them to be accessible for dvd or Blu Ray)?

Ah, i was wondering if someone would bring this up.

I am... very upset with the animation industry rn.

many companies have been increasing their turnover rates for animated projects, even after we have tried so hard to get more hospitable working environment in the industry. To explain, a turnover rate is how often people are let go from a project. For most animated projects, you're usually only on said project for how ever long your contract lasts (or until the show gets cancelled cause lets be real, shows are getting cancelled left and right regardless of it they are popular or not). Animators are used to jumping from project to project because you only work on a show for somewhere between a handful of months, to a few years and then you start looking for another job.

recently, I've noticed a trend where people will join a project, and then after a few months of working, suddenly they're laying people off, ignoring the contract they signed and just getting people out of the crew. this behavior has escalated and now shows just randomly are getting cancelled because some new guy is in charge and thinks he understands business or how animation works.

This is what's been happening with WBA. Cartoon Network, the kings of original properties, are basically being forced to do reboots. As a huge fan of them for what they have made and done, this is extremely upsetting to me. I've always dreamed of working at Cartoon Network if I ever joined a major studio but every days its looking like studios are just out to punch me in the gut because I just don't agree with anything they are doing anymore.

It doesn't help that EVERYONE is doing reboots rn either. I'm so, SICK OF REBOOTS. Artists have so many cool and fun stories to tell, LET THEM TELL THEIR STORIES FOR FUCKS SAKE!!

I honestly believe, individual/indie company projects are going to be what saves the animation industry rn. major companies have proven they only care about money time and time again and just keep throwing artists to the way side, not caring about how much we care about our craft. Making our own projects ourselves with crew that we pick and are passionate about making stories are gonna be what helps our craft evolve and keep going. The major studios are not going to be what help us move forward anymore.

Rad Sechrist and his friends making their own projects on their own, Vivsiepop and her series online, Lake Fama and their storyboard comic series, all of these incredible creators are telling their stories on their own because they can and because they just don't think any company would greenlight their stuff so they're doing it on their own (Lake I'm not entirely sure but I know their story is a personal project they're doing with their wife and I just wanna shout it out, here's the link to that project if you wanna read~).

The current sphere of animation is why I mainly do freelance and want to get my comic off the ground this year as well as build up to my animation pitch becoming a full pilot. I honestly am just tired of the industry I'm in right now constantly being a mess and I can't see myself working in it while its so turbulent and just.... I'm tired of watching my fellow creators get absolutely shit on daily by men at the top.

Those are my thoughts. Thank you for the ask. if anyone wants to talk with me about animation as well as action... i would love to talk to you~

-Pen

#pen talks #animation discussion #animation #asks #cartoon network #warner discovery

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polyamanga · 10 months

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Combining these into one post! As always, thank you for the recs!! (Also thank you for the note about the Tenchi Ending trope--I'd seen that name and figured it got renamed, but wasn't sure!)

Jingai-san no Yome doesn't seem to have an official English translation for its manga (doesn't look like it has a completed fan translation either), but the anime seems to be on Crunchyroll in the US. It sounds like a cute easygoing slice-of-life series!

High schooler Tomari Hinowa is called to the principal's office one day to hear some shocking news: he's getting married! A mysterious fluffy creature called Kanenogi has chosen him as their wife, and despite Tomari's initial misgivings, he decides to accept. What follows are a series of delightful tales from this new couple's monstrous married life.

You spelled it Sekieri, did you mean Sekirei? I've seen that one floating around, but I never knew anything about the plot. It reminds me of Master of Martial Hearts, except also not at all lmao. Although they do have a similar boobs-forward look to them 🤔

The stage is set. The preparations are complete. A grand battle royale known as "The Sekirei Project" is about to take the streets of Shintou Teito by storm. For this event, the shadowy corporation known as MBI has developed 108 "Sekirei"—advanced humanoid beings with extraordinary combat skills. Set free into the city, these Sekirei must search for their "Ashikabi," masters who can unlock and control their fighting potential through kissing. Once all the Sekirei are paired, they must battle until one team emerges victorious and claims the enigmatic grand prize. Enter Minato Sahashi, a ronin whose life is as bleak as it gets. Weak-willed and unconfident by nature, his circumstances become even more hopeless when he fails his college entrance exams for the second time. However, when he encounters a Sekirei called Musubi, a bond sparks between them, and he finds himself becoming her Ashikabi. Although he begins to enjoy his life with Musubi and the other Sekirei he bonded with, he consequently finds himself increasingly embroiled in The Sekirei Project. If Minato wants to protect his newfound life, he will need to step up and participate in this demanding, high-stakes battle.

World's End Harem is another one I've seen people mention in poly circles (along with Arifureta lol), but I haven't gotten around to checking it out. The plot of WEH always made me kinda sad tbh! It felt a little cheat-y to me, even though I might be jumping to conclusions. (I recently got burned by trying out Lust Geass and finding its just a big NTR-fest so I'm probably biased lmaooo)

Diagnosed with multiple sclerosis, young researcher Reito Mizuhara is to be put into cryosleep until a cure can be found. Short on time, Reito decides to confess his pent-up feelings to his childhood crush Erisa Tachibana and bids farewell to his family and friends. As Reito goes to sleep and his consciousness begins to fade, Erisa barges into the room and declares that she will wait for him. Five years later, Reito wakes up to a post-apocalyptic world where 99.9% of the world's male population had been eradicated by the "Man-Killer Virus" four years prior. He is one of a handful of men who have become immune to this virus due to sclerosis treatment. Reito and the other four men are now invaluable assets to humankind and are expected to impregnate as many women as possible. Reito, however, is determined to find Erisa and refuses to make love with any other women. With temptations lurking around every corner, can he hold on to the woman of his dreams?

Arifureta, like I mentioned above, is one I've been meaning to look into. I heard that the light novel has a somewhat poly ending, but who knows if the manga/anime do the same!

Seventeen-year-old Hajime Nagumo is your average, everyday otaku. However, his simple life of pulling all-nighters and sleeping in school is suddenly turned upside down when he, along with the rest of his class, is summoned to a fantasy world! They're treated like heroes and tasked with the duty of saving the human race from utter extinction. But what should have been any otaku's wet dream quickly turns into Hajime's nightmare. While the rest of his class are blessed with godlike powers, Hajime's job, Synergist, only has a single transmutation skill. Ridiculed and bullied by his classmates for being weak, he soon finds himself in despair. Will he be able to survive in this dangerous world of monsters and demons with only a glorified blacksmith's level of strength?

Fujimura-kun Mates is an interesting title! Wondering if it's 'mates' as in 'friends' or as in 'mating'...lmao. I'm a fan of the character designs, based on the volume covers. They're simple but cute!

Fujimura is a loner delinquent at his school. Feared by his classmates since the first day of high school, he's had no friends and usually ditches class. But even his standoffish nature can't hold up when a class president with a few screws loose comes after him! And two more class presidents. They're a few cards short of a full deck too. (Actually, he's more like the tsukkomi in a world of boke.)

Overlord; I watched the first couple episodes of season 1. I only got far enough (as far as I remember) to see one of his love interests (Albedo is freaking EVERYWHERE lol!!) but it seems on brand for there to be at least a few!

Yggdrasil is a virtual reality game renowned for the freedom it offers its players. After a simple tutorial, players are left to explore the world and can customize anything and everything, from their classes to their weapons. However, in the year 2138, the game sees its final hours as its servers shut down at midnight. Momonga, a devoted player of Yggdrasil, decides to spend the game's last hours inside his guild, Ainz Ooal Gown. Strangely, at the stroke of midnight, the game does not log him out. Instead, Momonga finds himself transported to another world, one that is seemingly identical to that of Yggdrasil. Facing an already abnormal situation, he discovers that the NPCs have gained sentience. Trapped in his avatar's skeletal body and desperate to uncover the cause of his predicament and find other players like him, Momonga sets out to take control of the new world with the help of his loyal subjects.

As for The Rising of the Shield Hero, I've seen season 1 and half of season 2, but haven't read any of the light novels/manga. The anime didn't seem to be going in a poly direction (many girls were into him, but he definitely seemed to view them all as his daughters lmao), but I'm sure the light novel could have had PLENTY of time to get there. (That being said, for any that may want to check this series out, episode one features discussions of hypothetical sexual assault (nothing shown since it doesn't actually happen), and slavery is a reoccurring theme.)

Stories of old tell of four otherworldly heroes—wielding the sword, spear, bow, and shield—who defended the land from wave after wave of calamity. With the fate of the world in balance, the kingdom of Melromarc summons these legendary figures; in modern-day Japan, the call is answered, and the unwitting heroes are transported to this fantasy universe. Thrust into Melromarc and given the title of "Shield Hero," otaku Naofumi Iwatani is labeled the weakest due to his lack of offensive capability and apparent inexperience. When the heroes part ways to start their journeys, he only has one willing companion: the beautiful princess Malty Melromarc. However, she soon betrays him, steals all his money, and accuses him of taking advantage of her. For his alleged crimes, Naofumi is branded a criminal and made outcast of society. With hatred filling his heart, he sets out alone, vowing vengeance against those who wronged him.

#Sekirei #Jingai-san no Yome #World's End Harem #asks #Arifureta #The Rising of the Shield Hero #Overlord #Fujimura-kun Mates #talking #anonymous

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wiimuu · 2 years

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Jayce x Reader*

Childhood Friends.

18+ (NSFW)

You and Jayce grew up together, and care for each other more than you care for yourselves. You couldn’t imagine a life without him, and swore to yourself you’d never let anything come in between your friendship. Even if that meant your feelings. Will you live by it?

word count: 3.7k

————

The lab was quiet, dark, and empty. It was the middle of the night and you skimmed over the various papers scattered across the worktable and floor. You were a childhood friend of Jayce's and always supported him ever since you two were kids. He always had bright ideas, finding different ways to make certain tasks easier, even if it was something as simple as opening a jelly jar. Although you looked up to him, supported him, and practically followed him wherever he went, you couldn't wrap your head around his thought process and the way he did things. You smiled bittersweetly at the messy scribbling on the papers, some crumpled up and tossed away. Even if he was one of the smartest people you and others have come to know, you couldn't imagine how tired he'd been. A cold chill brushing over your bare arms caused you to shiver quietly, hugging yourself to stay warm.

"Trying to steal my thunder, (Y/N)?" You jump at the sudden voice echoing around the room, turning over to see Jayce in regular clothing as opposed to his usual buttoned-up shirt and white vest. You let out a shaky sigh of relief once realizing it was just him and settle yourself against the worktable.

"Looks like you got here a little too late, I've already memorized everything." His eyebrow perks up along with the corner of his lips, curling into a smirk. He scoffs loud enough for you to hear and walks closer to you. On nights Jayce found himself too tired, stressed, or just bored with working on his latest project, he'd call you. No matter what time it was or how long the call would last you were always ready to answer, even if you'd fall right back asleep after picking up. Not that he minded, either way, he soaked up your company, your voice, your attention. Growing up you assumed he viewed you as a little sister, so you decided to keep it that way, swearing to yourself to never let anything go any farther than that. Because things were perfect just the way they were now, and you didn't want to ruin that.

"Really? Guess I'll have to keep a closer eye on you from now on." Jayce smiles softly to himself and you watch him, feeling your chest start to ache at the sight. His clothes wrinkled and bunched up in all the wrong places, hair twisting and turning in every which direction, and his eyes tired. He leaned over the table himself, eyeing the mountains of papers in front of him. You feel yourself soften, sympathizing with him, and push yourself off the table and stand next to him staring at the same mountains he was.

"What's on your mind, Jayce? You look like hell." His smile returns softly but doesn't stay for long, and he sighs.

"Just some...personal things," He mutters out while glancing over to you from the corner of his eye, but you don't notice, "I couldn't sleep, too many thoughts, dreams I couldn't get rid of." You hum quietly to yourself in thought, thinking about how you could help. And partially what could be bothering Jayce. It was something big enough for him to not share with you, which was new. You two have shared your deepest, most embarrassing secrets throughout the years. You would always joke about how you two were only friends because you both knew too much about one another. Jayce clears his throat and stands straight, catching your attention.

"I was going to come here to get my mind off things, but I don't think I'm in the right state of mind to work. Want to get some fresh air with me? Seeing as you're here, we could both use it." He wasn't wrong, you came to the lab despite not knowing a single thing because you couldn't sleep either. And the lab was the only place you felt comfortable loitering around in. Recently, you've been thinking of Jayce. A lot. It wasn't the usual concern for him, wondering what new invention he was coming up with, or if he'd been eating enough. None of that. Your thoughts were filled with just him. Broad shoulders, tired eyes, and his award-winning toothy smile. You found yourself snapped out of those thoughts with a hand waving in front of you, followed by your name. You shake your head and smile out of embarrassment, earning a smile in return from Jayce.

"Yeah, sorry. I'd love to." His smile stays and you two leave the lab together, shutting off the lights. Walking down the corridors, the only light being the moon peeking through the massive windows. And the only sounds of soft breathing and shoes tapping against the carpeted floor. You find your heart beating a little faster with each time your arms brush against each other, and being startled with every sniffle Jayce did.

Not too long later, you're both out the front doors and notice the heavy breaths you two let out at the same time, awkwardly laughing at each other. The crunching of gravel and various twigs under your feet make it feel less quiet along your walk together and somewhat settles your nerves. Although it doesn't do much with the acknowledgment of how close he is to you, no matter how little you try to scoot away as to not have your shoulders bump as often, Jayce seems to inch back to you. You cursed yourself in your head about having these kind of thoughts toward your best friend, and hating that he could affect you without even trying. You steal a glance toward Jayce and notice his eyebrows are furrowed, and lips tightened into a thin line. You stop in your tracks, worried. Without thinking, you take ahold of his forearm and stop him with you, his expression softening immediately.

"What's up (Y/N)? Are you okay? You've got a tight grip there." Jayce chuckles quietly and you realize you were holding onto him a little too tight, quickly letting go and clearing your throat.

"I could ask you the same thing, what's with the face? You look pissed." He stares at you, dumbfounded for a few seconds before laughing and rubbing the nap of his neck. God forbid you steal a peek at the way his shirt hugged his torso. This time you were pissed, you always knew when Jayce was avoiding you, hiding something. Others referred to him as cold, too professional. But being around him for so long, there was nothing about him you couldn't read. You lay your hand back on his arm, catching him off guard and feeling him tense under your fingers.

"You can talk to me, you know, about anything." He gulps and finally drops his hand from his neck, shoulders slouching and his head hangs, not being able to look you in the eye.

"Promise you won't walk away." This side of him was surprising to you. He was soft, scared, and tense. As if comforting a scared animal, you guide him to the nearest bench and you both sit down, holding his hands in your own. You lean forward to meet eyes with him and whisper, "I promise."

It takes a few seconds of Jayce hesitating to say something, before retreating back into himself and deciding otherwise. You'd be lying if you said you weren't losing patience, but you cared about Jayce way too much. Your mind raced at what it could be. Maybe a project wasn't turning out the way he wanted? Did Viktor bail on him? Was his idea rejected?

"I think about you, (Y/N). A lot." Your heart sank and fingers twitched against his. You look around the gravel beneath you, trying to shake yourself from your own feelings. He probably just meant he was worried about you, he must've noticed how strung out you've been lately. You smile at him and nod in agreement.

"Thank you Jayce, but you don't have to worry about me, really." He stays quiet before his grip tightens around your hands and lifts you to stand with him, not saying a word and throwing you off.

A hand snakes around your waist and supports your back while the other cups your face, lifting your attention up to a pair of golden eyes. You freeze, arms suspended in the air out of pure shock, and find yourself stumbling with what to say. You start to laugh and press against his chest, trying to pry yourself out and recollect yourself, your face a steaming mess. Jayce keeps you in place, holding you while staring at you with a stern expression, his eyes exploring different parts of your face. You couldn't handle the embarrassment, how close you two were, the way his arms and hands held you. Not to mention with the casual clothing he was in, being much thinner than his usual attire, you could feel how built Jayce was. You always knew he loved to stay in shape and basked in the attention, loving to brag about how much he could lift. Yet you'd never realize the reality of it till he was firmly pressed against you, his chest rising and falling as he held steady breaths.

"I'm worried about myself," Jayce whispers, his eyes focused on the lower part of your face, "What I'd do given the chance, the opportunity. If only I knew." His voice trails off and his grip softens, letting you stand on your feet properly, now not being able to look at you.

"Knew what?" You ask.

"How you felt, (Y/N). About me, what I am to you, what you want me to be." Your heart races with every word he says. This must be a dream, you thought, there was no way Jayce would be saying any of this to you. But, given if this were a dream, you'd take any chance you could get to be near Jayce the way you wanted to be.

Taking his face gently in your hands, you pull him to you, pressing your lips softly against his. The new feeling excited you, the texture, taste, and feeling of him melting into you sparked something inside you. Hunger. A soft mewl escapes from you as you snake one of your hands from Jayce's face to his hair, tangling your fingers in it. With little to no hesitation, Jayce gives into the kiss and wraps both his arms around your waist, hugging you tightly as if you'd easily slip away from him. The silence is filled with heavy breathing and soft smacking of your lips colliding, absorbing each other in, hands roaming, experimenting. Eventually, you two pull apart, lips pink and out of breath. Realizing what you'd just done, you attempt to fix your hair and fumble with your hands, not being able to look him in the eye. A lift of the chin and you look into those golden eyes again. This time hooded and heavy, filled with something you knew all too well. Your chest tightened and heat pulsed, your legs pressing together desperate for friction. This time Jayce leans in, placing a chaste kiss and leaves you chasing his lips, a small chuckle leaving him. Flustered, you pout at him, soon after turning into a sly smirk. Jayce looks to you questioningly.

"Let's take this to my room, it'd be a lot more..private." You watch Jayce stiffen and shudder at the offer, nodding softly regardless, eyes never peeling off of you. You smile, satisfied with his compliance and lead him to your room by hand. Again, another familiar walk filled with glittering moonlight and hollow steps. But the air seemed heavier this time around, as if you couldn't breathe, and needed to get out of there as soon as possible. Jayce continued to follow with laced fingers, not saying a single word.

Not too long after but what felt like forever, you find yourselves at the bedroom door. Before you get to even attempt opening it, Jayce has you pressed against the door, back against your chest. Your hands stabilize you from the sudden push and take a glance upward toward Jayce, his expression sending some sort of shock-wave throughout your body. Next is the feeling of his bulge against your thigh, you whimper shakily through your breath as your hands start to fidget and search for the doorknob. Finally getting it to open, the both of you stumble through the entrance and fall to the floor, back and hips pressed against you once more. You'd never felt so hungry, so desperate to strip and explore someone else. Let alone, that someone being your best friend, your only friend. That thought crossing your mind, you seem to snap to your senses.

"Jayce, wait!" He immediately stops what he's doing, trying to maintain his lost breath.

"Did I hurt you? Are you okay?" Jayce fumbles with his words laced with worry and regret. You sink into the floor and sigh.

"Is this..really okay? Is this what you want?" All you hear above you is silence and you regret stopping the moment, but would hate yourself for feeling like you've put this pressure on him.

"I haven't been able to sleep these past few nights because of you," Jayce mutters into your ear, his soft breath brushing against your skin, "I thought I had it under control, but the thought of the endless things I could be doing to you. That's what keeps me up at night. You, (Y/N)."

The confident and seductive tone of his voice could practically finish you off itself. You scrambled to gather your thoughts, only to be left continuing to scramble by another soft press from his hips. Stiffness grazing against you. You bury your face into the floor out of sheer embarrassment and let yourself lay limp, weakened by his confession. Satisfied with your reaction, Jayce lifts himself along with you in one arm and closes the door with the other. Holding you over his shoulder, he splays you across your bed, and his eyes feed off the sight. Your hair a mess, chest rising faster than it is falling, and eyes locked on Jayce. The straps of your tank-top cling loosely to your shoulders , and the sweats you'd worn were well beneath your hips. He soaked this all in, hands shakily resting on your knees. Pressing your legs apart Jayce invites himself in between, arms supporting him as he now hangs over you.

"(Y/N)..I don't remember how, or when it started. But it's been so long I don't even care anymore." Jayce puts a bit of lack into his support and kisses you gently, tenderly, then pulls away to look at you with hooded eyes. "I've wanted this longer than you could probably imagine. I've wanted you." You couldn't believe this. All these years, hiding how you felt, and he was suffering just the same? You examined Jayce's features, the lighting from behind casting shadows across his face. It was dark, but you knew he meant it.

"I've dreamed of being with you like this, for as long as I can remember, Jayce. I wouldn't have it any other way." Without further instruction Jayce locks his fingers into your waistband, gliding the sweats off your legs. Shortly after, your shirt goes off too. Now partially bare although not much is left to the imagination, Jayce marvels at you.

Dipping in he presses gentle kisses across your throat and scatters them across your shoulders and collarbones. Flinching at each and every touch, you didn't know what you'd gotten yourself into. You never thought Jayce could feel this way, could desire just as much as you could. Once you notice the kisses are migrating downward, you're snapped into reality and your head jerks forward, fingers desperately grabbing at Jayce's hair. He laughs heartily and looks to you between strands of hair, his eyes and smile nearly making your heart explode. Maintaining eye contact, you both feel your grasp start to soften, watching him slowly dip in between your legs. Not being able to bare the sight any longer your hands stay in place on top of Jayce's head, your own head tilted back bracing yourself. Cold, wetness jolts your body into curling and lock eyes with Jayce. His head between your thighs, your hands resting on his head, and his hands gripping your thighs for control. The sight burned a flame of excitement you didn't know you had in you. Jayce slowly taking the hint, he goes back to work, not breaking eye contact. He winds you up and doesn't stop till you're an absolute squirming mess. It didn't take long for that to happen. Intending to break you in, two soft pads of his fingers press against your entrance, his mouth now slowing to focus on you. You ached for his touch, finding your hips grinding desperate to have his fingers inside you. Jayce smirks at the sight and settles them in slowly, watching you whine and writhe because of him. He watched you intently while taking notes on the spots he hits that makes you moan.

"Please, Jayce." You begged breathlessly, hands gripping onto his biceps for dear life. "Inside me, I want you inside me." By this time all reason had left you, and all you cared about was having your best friend fuck your brains out.

You help him slip his top off, followed with his own pair of sweats, then his briefs. Your body shuddered at the sight of him, red, and begging to be touched. Your hand snakes down your stomach and let your fingers graze alone his member, watching him noticeable shake at the contact, eyes scrunching in concentration. Grabbing a hold of it, you press it to your heat, basking in the feeling, losing yourself once again. Jayce doesn't fall far behind, drowning in the slightest feeling of pleasure. Neither of you had felt anything like it, and you both drank it up, parched.

“I don’t think I can take much more,” Jayce manages to say through gritted teeth, hands clasping at the sheets beneath you. “…can i?” Before you care to think about it, you’re already eagerly nodding, watching Jayce smile in triumph.

He effortlessly slides in, your nails digging into his arms as he stretched and buried himself into you. Your body betrayed you as it twitched and ached for Jayce to move, making it more than obvious to him. Although he was barely hanging on by a thread himself, warmth surrounding him nearly causing him to melt. Feeling his arms grow weaker and weaker, he couldn’t tap out now. He wanted, needed this to last. As your legs rested on his hips as they wrapped around him, Jayce found himself trying his damned best to move, finding a steady rhythm to keep up with. Not being as slow and passionate as he’d hope for it to be, he couldn’t help but chase the immense pleasure that pulsed through him with each thrust. Each cry that slipped between your lips, watching your face relax and contort with every move, the hint of his name every now and again. He loved it all.

It wasn’t soon after he started to notice a change in your behavior. Your hips started to move a lot more on their own, your moans growing more needy, more desperate. He could tell you were getting close, and wanted to torture you more, slamming his hips against yours. Your cries now heavier, his name shamelessly screamed out and hands holding onto anything nearby for dear life. Just the sight was nearly tipping him over the edge, even though he saw how badly you needle release, he slowed himself down to savor this taste. Power, over you. You, who’ve teased and picked at him all these years, acting so high and mighty toward him. Now a begging, sweaty mess beneath him. Because of him. He groaned at the whine that immediately escaped you from the sudden pace change, your eyes opening to meet with his. He was enjoying this, every second of it. You felt intimidated, excited, and terrified at the same time. He’d messed you up this much, you couldn’t hide your need for him anymore. In front of him you were an open book for once, and the vulnerability only made your heart pound even harder.

“Beg for it, (Y/N). Tell me what you want.” The sudden mood change threw you for a loop, softly moaning at each kiss he pressed to your face. His hips were moving painfully slow, Jayce enjoying getting to know each and every detail of you, inside and out.

“I…I want you, Jayce. Please, please fuck me.” Your plea comes out in broken breaths and shame, hating the feeling of being told what to do. But you wanted to finish more than anything, hell if your pride was going to get in the way of that. He smiled sweetly, combing his fingers through your hair lovingly, locking them in.

Before processing the grip on your hair, you were already being slammed into again. Desperately adjusting to the returned feeling you cry out, sounds you’ve never heard yourself make. It’s not long after your body arches and pressed against Jayce’s chest, your head rolling back and your hips grind and ride out your high. He finally decides to let go himself and loses all strength he’d been mustering up this entire time, face falling into the crook of your neck as he spasmed inside you. His short exhales filling your ear and sending chills down your spine. Each twitch that comes from each of you, the other reacts out of sensitivity, and you both find yourself laughing.

Jayce slides himself out with a groan and lays next to you, hand resting on his forehead, catching his breath. You turn and lay your hand across his chest, coated in sweat and lightly drag your finger in circles over him, admiring his build. As he does the same to your back his head lazily turns to you, and places a kiss to the top of you head, catching you by surprise. Snoring follows not too long ago and you giggle to yourself, snuggling into him and finding yourself fall asleep just as quickly.

——

hi, hehe;; this is my first attempt at a post. i love writing this kind of stuff, so i hope to continue to do more. (⁄ ⁄•⁄ω⁄•⁄ ⁄)

#arcane #lol #league of legends #jayce arcane #jayce x y/n #18+ content #arcane smut

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paradoxesofgalaxies · 1 year

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(I'm getting ideas from the recent ask game lol) Have you ever dyed your hair, or what color would you want to dye it?

Have you ever had a recurring dream?

Also, what's been your favorite embroidery project?

Thank you 💜

I've been dying my hair consistently since I went away to college and could finally do it without my parents seeing. We started with a red to hopefully lessen the parents reaction. Then we did black for a while. Then we dyed the underside of our hair purple with the rest of our hair black. Then blue. Then I caught my hair on fire bleaching it and had to chop my hair off and went back to black. For the next many years we alternated between black, burgundy, and deep purple as we could get away with those for work. After shaving one side of our head we went bright red. Then kept shaving more of our hair off and dying it different colors. We went silver at one point. And for the past several years we've had hair just on the top of our head and typically dye it teal/blue though sometimes, if my shoulders are working well enough, I do purple at the roots blending into teal at the tips (my hair's about 5" high when I spike it now).

I already talked about a few of my recurring dreams but one of my favorites involves being able to jump super high and float down slowly with some ability to regain height in the air. It's such a frequent dream that just thinking about it I can feel the sensation of float flying.

I've only done a couple embroidery projects so far. The first was embroidering letters which was kinda boring and repetitive. The next was the manga panel from Black Clover of Charmy flat on her face. And now I'm working on a panel from Demon Slayer of Nezuko in her box. I think the Nezuko one is my favorite thus far.

#galactic gab #asked and answered

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dragon-spaghetti · 1 year

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Ok so!! It's almost the new year!! Holy shit!!!

2022 has been. Something. A lot went wrong this year, and if you knew me in the first half of it you know how I was ✨going through it✨ lmfao

I kept it off of tumblr mostly, so for those of you who don't know; my family was evicted so I was homeless for like a week (we are now fine thankfully), we all got covid, while isolating we found out my granda could die at any time (he then passed like 2 weeks before we got evicted), had some friend group fuckery, plus a fuckton of school stress , all within the first three months of the year!

There was plenty more shit after that, such as the amount of coursework I had due, drama practical exams, the written exams (featuring my school fucking up the course, which we found out with 24 hours to go til the exam), and a very stressful few months of job searching which eventually ended with me biting the bullet and having to go full time rather than part time like I'd intended, plus a lot of mental health struggles in between 😭

Needless to say; very stressful year, I can safely say I couldn't even really breathe until October. Which was then followed by art burnout caused by sheer exhaustion from now working a 9-5, something that devastated me as I no longer had the energy to do what I love as much as I wanted to. But that doesn't mean everything was all bad!!

I made so many amazing friends this year, and became closer to many I already had. Jumping around fandoms more has honestly been great to meet so many groups. I improved a shitton w my art, got to be involved with multiple fan projects, started posting on other places than just tumblr, we hit 1000 followers here (recently 1600!!!) which is something I only ever dreamed of a couple years ago! I also finally finished school, and honestly didn't realise how amazing it would feel to finally be free from that damn place after 7 long, miserable years

This is so long but, I want to say thank you for bearing with me through it all. I know I've been a bit all over the place, but I genuinely adore the lil community we've built here, and I hope it continues to grow through 2023 💖

#drag rambles #tw: death mention #<- just in case :0 #if you read through all of that then I commend you lmfao #but yeah Uh #I was not joking when I kept saying 2022 was hell on earth :')#I shit you not we got the eviction notice on January 5th THE YEAR WAS FUCKED LESS THAN A WEEK IN #I know saying 'I was homeless for a week' sounds v dramatic but like #remember there was a solid 3 months of terrifying uncertainty where we didn't know what was gonna happen to us #we could've been in a hostel until further notice #we could've had to give up our dog if we had nowhere to go #we happened to get lucky. but it was terrifying #even though friends can confirm I was joking about it through it all. I think everyone knew I was terrified lmao #words really can't describe how that dread feels until you live it #but it's all good now! we're ok. that was by far the worst event of the year. but it's ok #this year has been so difficult not just for me but to so many people I know #and look at us. we made it guys. we made it #I'm so proud of everyone. and yes that includes you reading this rn 💖#happy new year everyone 💖💖💖

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ajokeformur-ray · 2 years

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We were born from the same star, destined in a cosmic love // Otto x Kath

A/N: A personalised comfort fic for @tsukiakarinobara, who is lovely and deserves the world. I'm sending you so much love, many many hugs, and some serious cuddles from Otto. It's been a long time since I wrote for YOU, so I extra hope you like it!❤️

I stalked (affectionate) your blog, asked questions, I watched Spider Man 2 while writing this and binged Otto fics on here, so hopefully I got his characterisation and your relationship with him right! I've never written for Otto before; this is all very new to me so I really really hope you like this!❤️

Summary: Otto comforts you by letting you know that he's there for you, that he cares, and above all else, that he loves you.

No triggers but I thought these worth mentioning: mentions of past Otto x Rosie (canon compliant; predates your relationship by some years), fluff, comfort, talks of universe jumping, Peter is a dear friend to you and Otto, personal details are included with permission.

Word count: 1, 841.

THIS IS NOT A READER INSERT FIC (though of course other people are welcome to read this, it is first and foremost for Kath).

"If you keep something as complicated as love stored up inside, it's gonna make you sick."

Words Otto had spoken once, long ago, over tea with you and Peter, had reverberated inside your mind again and again and again in the weeks leading up to the day you switched universes just so that you could be with him. These words, a throwaway statement steeped in wisdom he had gained from a life well loved, well lived, had been the deciding factor in you confessing your feelings for Otto (as well as Peter's encouragement and nudging, which really was as subtle as a sledgehammer, though the man meant well).

Otto had thanked you for your bravery in that moment by meeting you in the middle; a mutual decision to make it happen but then, oh, and then, to make it work. His reactionary smile had blinded you in the face of your confession, and just like the surface of the ocean under the moon, you had given him the same expression.

A love shared was a love doubled.

He, too, had been sitting on his feelings for you, and your developing relationship was the slow burn to end all slow burns. The two of you took what was building between you slowly, so slowly, after your confession, but the payoff had been more than worth it. Long nights spent sat close to Otto and listening to him talk you through his most recent scientific project turned into you sat on his lap, the both of you holding the other close, over months and months. The core of your relationship had remained the same, with you besotted, fascinated, and Otto feeling almost shy under all of your careful attentions and affections. He had reached out to you with his hand, literally and metaphorically, and after all of this time later, your relationship now stable, set in its ways and constantly changing and evolving, you had yet to let go of him.

You had always known (and thus accepted and respected) that, many years ago, the late Rosie had planned to never let go, but one great big miscalculation borne not from the faults of Otto's careful research but from a lack of general knowledge about Artificial Intelligence, which hindered Otto's life's work and made it a ruin, had made her release her grip before she or Otto were ready.

The same miscalculation would not be made a second time.

A mistake once? Was just that.

But the same mistake twice? That would be a choice.

Otto was choosing differently this time, every day, time and again.

In part due to how long it had taken the two of you to get together, due to how many nights you had spent under a blanket together, discussing the most recent scientific theory or gazing at the stars together, swapping stories of your day, quoting poetry at each other or simply being together in the moment - you had always shared such a cosmic love - Otto was able to read you like a book.

Indeed, he knew you as well as you knew yourself, and you would never take that for granted. Not least of all because you knew Otto at his very core, too. You knew of his untold tragedies, of how the actuators and his shared purpose had caused a crossfire between morality and reality, of how he had never been truly able to grieve for Rosie right up until you had dropped through the portal and into Peter's arms (how the two of you had managed to communicate while occupying different universes, you still didn't know, but you suspected that America Chavez had pulled some serious strings to accommodate your wants), and given Otto a new lease of life.

Otto was a brilliant scientist but even he liked to believe that the both of you were born from dust of the same star; why else, how else, had the two of you beat the odds of your individual lives and universes to find one another? It was why he called you names relating to stars; he believed that a star had died so that the both of you could live, and you felt so comfortable and safe with one another because the remains of that star recognised parts of itself in the other person.

Science is another form of modern day magic, after all, constantly changing and evolving, just as humans did from one day to the next.

On this day, you had gone to bed very late. Or, very early. It depended on one's perspective, but either way, the birds had been waking up just as you had gone to bed, and your absence in bed had made it difficult for Otto to sleep solidly, the dark bags under his eyes almost purple; like a bruise. The shade was a sharp contrast to the pale complexion; Otto looked almost sick in his pain; the actuators were at least a couple hundred pounds of metal and they were fused to his spinal column. Many days, they were the only reason Otto could move around the apartment, or continue his work in the lab. Back massages and long hot soaks in the bath were essential for him, and you were only too happy to take care of Otto in every way he wanted and even ways he hadn't considered; each of you liked to expand the other's worldview with your life experiences, thoughts and opinions.

Otto took care of you, too. He always did his best to. You were on equal footing in your relationship; even though you barely understood most of what he spoke of over dinner - at least ninety per cent went right over your head - you still listened, your gorgeous eyes alight with passion, with love and adoration for your scientist. What one received, the other returned, and so on it went, until months had bled into years and yet still were you as in love as you had been on the day you met.

Today had shaped up to be a dark day, and Otto worried after you as you shuffled into the bedroom, your feet muffled by the sounds of the birds outside accompanied with the awful sounds of car engines being turned as the city, too, began to wake up. His chocolate eyes followed you as you striped off and climbed into bed beside him, your light hair and eyes a familiar contrast to his own darker features. You nuzzled your head into the pillow, and Otto sighed in relief as your hand, already warm under the covers, crept across the bedsheets until your fingers wrapped around his own larger ones. His touch was soft, his hands callused, worn from years of manual use, and his fingers squeezed around your own.

I'm here, my little star. I'm here.

You shuffled again across the expanse of the comfortable mattress - Otto's own side designed to be firmer, with added grooves to fully support the actuators and take the weight off his back while he slept - and Otto lifted one arm, calling you instantly into his side. It was where you wanted to be even when you were there. His body is your home. Your face crumpled as a new wave of sorrow crashed over you. It came in like the tide and so all you could do was to ride it out. But not alone, never alone. You were sick of crying, and so you didn't, but your throat was thick and heavy with a lump and your eyes stung both with physical exhaustion, previous hours of crying and more tears you refused to let fall.

You felt so sick.

"Oh, my stardust," Otto sighed, his mouth tilting downwards in sympathy, "come here." It was a superfluous sentence, for you already were here, but you pushed yourself as close to him as you possibly could, his heart pounding in your ear, his skin soft and warm under your touch. Otto's hand was large, his fingers splayed as he rubbed up and down your face in firm, fluid motions, his lips in your hair as you both stayed in that moment together. The both of you knew well that if emotions weren't vented as and when they came to visit, that they would just fester and worsen and show up in uglier ways, and so when either of you needed affection or some extra love, some tenderness, whenever you needed anything, you both made sure to be there no matter what. "When you wake, I'm going to take care of you, but you need sleep right now. Your body needs it, so does your beautiful mind." Otto pressed some kisses to your temple to accentuate his point even as he stretched out under the duvet and touched your shin lightly with his foot. You parted your lower legs just enough for Otto to slot his own between, and the two of you anchored your bodies together, ready for some proper sleep.

You couldn't ever securely rest without being made wholly aware of the others' presence beside you in the bed.

Otto moved once more to cup your face in his hands, his fingers curling behind your ears, your hair spilling over his touch. "The power of the sun in the palm of my hands," he whispered, trying to think of poems he used to read, but unable to conjure up anything more than this, which was everything to you. "I'm always here, my little star. You know that, don't you?"

He pressed a tender kiss to your forehead and you smiled, your hands coming up so that you could interlock your fingers with his, "shouldn't that be my line? You're my sunshine, the light of my life."

Otto's smile deepened so much that you saw all of his wrinkles, crow's feet at the base of his eyes, and the dimples in his jaw. Oh, but he was so beautiful. "I am, stardust, and you need sleep. So do I."

Your heart warmed to hear the implication that Otto knew how much you loved him, without question, and he knew that you knew the same, too. Indeed, he kissed your forehead, then your sore eyelids, then your cheeks, your chin, and your lips, in a carefully constructed pattern, and then he laid down, letting his body sink into the mattress. The actuators settled around his body, and one of them, the one you thought to be called Flo, came up and over Otto so that she could playfully nip at your hair, like a bird grooming its human.

"I love you too, Flo," You kissed each of the actuators in turn, then Otto, and finally, you rested your head on the pillow which smelled deeply of Otto, as if his scent was permeated into the fibres and stitching, and allowed sleep to find you.

You wouldn't be alone even in your dreams, for Otto would follow you anywhere. What was the sun without his moon and stars?

#self-shipping #cosmic love

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