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mojoflower · 7 years

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Magical/Mage/Spark Stiles fic recs (90%Sterek, 5%Steter)

A Moving Sea Between the Shores by foxtricks (knightofbows) M. 26k. Complete. They're so fucked. They fucked up so bad. And it's all Stiles' fault." // Love one another but make not a bond of love: let it rather be a moving sea between the shores of your souls." - Khalil Gibran

What delicious torture and pain and mistakes and regret and fear and suspense, unf. Stiles, it turns out, is quite a powerful mage, but he DOES make a small miscalculation... which very nearly leads to the deaths of the whole pack, to his imprisonment and torture. If only he and Derek had Bonded first, they might not have fallen to this point. But they hadn't....

Chapters alternate from what leads up to the Fuck Up and what follows. Derek is a good Alpha, Stiles is a good Emissary, but each thinks the other deserves better than what they could offer. Fully satisfying ending with sufficient comfort.

Dream of Life Again by BarlowGirl E. 18k. Complete. “You better be ready,” Lydia says as she cleans dirt out from under her nails with an antiseptic wipe. Stiles can smell the lemon scent even from where he stands a few feet away. She’s probably going to end up covered in blood in a few moments, but she likes to be in control in any way she can, so he doesn’t tease her about this. “It’s time to start.” // “I’m ready,” Stiles says and he’s pretty sure it’s not even a lie. Hopefully. // Scott, Stiles, and Lydia each sit at one point of the triskelion that Lydia’s drawn on the tarp. The center is a tight knot of some language Stiles had never even heard of before this, written in ink in tiny writing. It’s beautiful and also makes him slightly nauseated. Lydia makes both cuts, so the blood drops from Stiles’ arm and Scott’s, too, into the center of the triskelion. There’s wolfsbane on Scott’s knife, not enough to make him sick, but enough to keep him from healing too quickly. // It’s a surprisingly simple thing, after that, for what they’re doing. Blood, a few words, and a little magic. // Just those things, and, for the first time in three years, Laura Hale gasps in a breath. // Or: Resurrected Laura!!!

What an interesting story. It felt strangely... clinical?... distant, maybe. Stiles is very removed from everyone, and there's alot of teasing in the beginning as to why (we never DO learn the full story there). Any road, Stiles has a connection to some veerry powerful magic, but doesn't really want to think about it too much, much less admit it. Meanwhile, he continues with his distant-yet-close relationship with the pack, and his strange dance with Derek, and just. It was very interesting.

Such Things Don't Bear Repeating by Allizane E. 25k. Complete. A wizard, a wolf, and a boy. Or: spells and magic can never truly substitute for strength. (Harry Potter AU, in triplicate.)

This was beautiful, flowed like poetry, kind of. Three parts, three points of view, and we slowly watch Stiles grow, watch his powers develop. I never did figure out what he was supposed to be: he's a bit sociopathic, but has every reason to be (he's missing his tongue when Deaton first finds him.) I probably wouldn't have read it if I'd noticed the dark!Stiles tag, but the story didn't really come across that way. More wild!Stiles, and the future's wide open. ******* So Derek takes the twisted threads of blood and bone and fire (because they’d all tasted like ash to the wolf, like someone was already burning them up), he takes them and ties the loose ends to Stiles, because what else is there to do?

The Long Way Round by exclamation E. 180k. Complete. A magical accident sends Stiles back in time. Now he's stuck in New York, living with Derek and Laura, and the only way to get back to his own time is to learn to use magic. Meanwhile, he must figure out how much he can tell them about their future. Can he warn them about the dangers they face? Can he change his own past?And can he trust the creature known as Bookworm, who seems to know him better than he knows himself?

oh. my. fucking. god.

this is astonishing.

The one where Stiles is MAGIC, whoa, that is such a focus, and he's powerful, and you get the learning montage and everything. (He's also the ouroboros, which explains how he got sent back in time to hang out with Derek and Laura when they're living in New York.) The one with the dragon, Bookworm, and the magic shop, and the accidental coven, and the vengence ghost, and where Derek is a dancer at a club (lol) and ALL THE GOOD THINGS.

i am addicted to death (so remind me what it’s like to live) by cywscross T. 18k. 1/2 but it reads like it’s complete. Stiles is sixteen years old. He has already died seventy-eight times.

Holy shit. (This says 1/2, but it's tight and complete, no worries.)

Magic Marker by Batwynn G. 3k. Complete. Look, just because he’s magical, doesn’t mean Stiles has to be an adult, right? // Where Scott keeps quoting Spider Man when he comes in the room, his dad keeps getting that pinched look around his eyes when he accidentally turns the microwave into a portal to another timeline, Lydia has stopped wasting her breath by heaving great, disappointed sighs at him, and Derek… Derek tells him to get it out of his system somewhere not here. Which is actually pretty nice, for someone with such judgmental eyebrows.

I would SO love to get a bigger peek into this world, heh.

In Which Stiles is Secretly Magic by apocryphal T. 27k. Complete. All Stiles wants from life is to learn to control his magic, keep his grades up, and not die horribly while saving Beacon Hills from supernatural threats. It's all going pretty well until Derek Hale, werewolf extraordinaire, has to go and ask him on a date. That asshole.

lol... stiles is a hoot.

Attach me to your world by artisan447 E. 27k. Complete. Turns out Stiles is magic. He's as surprised about that as anyone.

Sweet, sexy and intense: everything you want a surprise bonding fledgling magic fic to be.

Growing Up, Growing Strong by cywscross T. 10k. Complete. Stiles is adopted by the Hales.

Lovely series of snapshots. Stiles at 10 saves the Hales, but loses his dad, and Talia takes him in, but it's Peter he attaches to. There's selective mutism, slow integration, kidnapping, self-rescue, discovery of magic (spark), and he's 16 in the end, but I think the rating could have easily remained a G. (We'll have to use our imaginations for the rest.)

Red Witch by rootbeer T. 34k. Complete. The red hair of a banshee. The red eyes of an alpha. The red hoodie of a mage. The red of fire burning.Derek Hale has been a prisoner to the hunters since they burned his family alive. But now someone has come to save him: skinny, defenseless Stiles--147 lbs of skin and fragile bones. Turns out, sarcasm isn't his only weapon.

Ah, this hit the spot. Derek's a mess, poor baby, he's spent years locked in a cell in isolation being taunted by Kate when Stiles shows up as a captive in the next cell. It's about everything you'd want. (I love the protective fire around Derek, it's perfect.) Stiles is a BAMF, Derek is a beta. And those stories about the Red Witch and his/her companions? Not just fairy tales.

Children's Tales by artemis69 G. 5k. Complete. Be careful, little girl. // Don’t go causing troubles in Beacon Hills, because the Hales live there, little girl. // Keep away from Beacon Hills, little girl, or the Hales will destroy you. // --Or: In a world where the Hales are alive and the protectors of the town of Beacon Hills, the humans politely fake ignorance of their not-really-human status, and they all live happily ever after. // Then Kate comes in. // Well. // Tries to.

How much did I love this story, omg, it's kind of hilarious: Kate (POV) goes Hale-hunting and is thwarted at EVERY TURN because the whole damn town knows who she is, and who Derek is, and the character descriptions are so funny: "The annoying other kid is still there and both of them are mowing the lawn of a little white house. Hale is very focused, working methodically in parallel strips. His friend is running in circles around a rose bush like a rabbit on cocaine."

Inhuman History by Amazonia_8 E. 32k. 7/? Stiles doesn't remember much about what happened the night he was to be introduced to the mysterious Hale family. He knows his mother is dead, but nobody can tell him why. He thinks it might have something to do with the things that happen to him, or that he can make happen, even though he's never been able to control it. Now it's just him and his father, an invalid he must spend all his time caring for, scraping by in a run down house in a run down town, miles away from the life he once knew. // Until strange things begin to happen, starting with the great black wolf that shows up at his door and the stranger man that claims he knows his father. Claims that Stiles is in danger and that it is his duty to protect him.

Hooooly guacamole. This one is a RIDE, I'm pretty sure I only breathed once in the whole first half. Only 7 chapters written, and it looks like it'll stay that way, and the story isn't NEAR complete, but you do get to end on a very satisfying sex scene, and this author is so good that even a glimpse into this world she's building is worth the time you put in to read it. The first chapters are such a tease, with references to things like John being paralyzed and mute, and Stiles having flashing memories of 'before', and it doesn't get explained for a while (it does eventually, tho, don't worry), and wow, it's just fantastic.

The Road Less Traveled by gryvon E. 25k. Complete. Stiles doesn't want to die in a basement. No one is going to die in the Argent's basement, not if he can help it.

ALL the Stiles!whump and hurt/comfort (although the comfort for the first round of hurt is rest-of-pack rather than Derek, but it's totally emotionally satisfying. This is the one where Stiles starts practicing magic by twiddling a pencil and then gets to firebomb some ghoul-things in the cemetery.

Night Owls Early Birds by Lissadiane T. 24k. Complete. Confession: Stiles is afraid of having magic. // The Spark had been cool. It had been small, manageable. He could do some funky stuff with Mountain Ash, all with the power of belief. // And now here he is, his Spark blown wide open, apparently coming down with a fatal case of magical overload, and all that stands between him and bleeding out is a grumpy owl that looks suspiciously like a feathered version of Derek Hale. // (In which Stiles learns he's a witch, but instead of a wand and a trip to Diagon Alley, he gets blood magic, a grumpy and reluctant owl as his companion, and an accidental blood bond with Derek Hale.)

Oh. This was... really intense, I wasn't expecting that, somehow, the summary made it seem kind of funny. Stiles' magic is no fucking joke, and it LITERALLY tears him apart sometimes, like, peeling his hands inside out and crushing them kind of thing... and all the extraordinary pain that goes with it. When they say blood magic, that means there's gallons of it everywhere. Which is AMAZING, and the intensity is wonderful, don't get me wrong, it's unique among the 'Stiles discovers he is magic' stories, because it really does seem more like a curse than a gift. Steve the owl is a hoot (lol), and Derek's quiet loyalty and fierce protectiveness is lovely. It's a fantastic read, and so is its sequel.

In Which Stiles Finds He Much Prefers When Interesting Things Happen to Somebody Else by Zoom Zoom (PaperLillyWebs) T. 21k. Complete. “Finish what you start,” the skull rasps at him, making him jump. When he looks up, the skull is just as still as before.Loosely based on Howl's Moving Castle by Diana Wayne Jones.

What a fun story! Stiles the apprentice is every bit of adorable, his Master Hale is a shadowy, mean kind of figure, and something's going on where none of the ends match up. The story borrows the Howl's Moving Castle world, but that's all, none of the story or characters. I love it.

How to please your house spirit by Lesatha M. 14k. Complete. Derek startled awake in the middle of the night. For a split second he didn’t know why, then as he felt a strange weight on his chest, he raised his head and looked down. And stayed speechless. // There was a tiny creature, barely the size of Derek’s whole hand, sitting on him. It had a human shape, from what Derek could see.It looked furious.

ohmygod this is infinitely adorable, Stiles is a (murderous, multitasking, shapeshifting) little shit (so is Peter) and Derek is utterly wrapped around his (occasionally) tiny finger.

Of Werewolves and Tentacles by Guede E. 173k. Complete. Stiles Stilinski and Scott McCall, childhood best friends who were separated, now reunite to get to know each other again. Since Scott's a werewolf and Stiles is a new graduate of Miskatonic University (which is proving strangely attractive to Peter-Hale-shaped werewolves), they've got quite a bit to catch up on.

So glorious. A lot of fun to read, lots of action and complexity and I know basically nothing about Lovecraft, and that didn't matter at all. Stiles is great in this, very pushy, very much an asshole, and still got that old insecurity inside... which, coincidentally, is very much what Peter is like. They're a lovely match. (The fifth story introduces Derek into their dynamic, but only in the end, and, sadly, we never get the sexin' for that -- aside from some strange dreams in Part 6 -- cause it would be delicious.)

And what are the odds that I'd read two sentient house fics in the same month? (The other being the equally fabulous When sparks fly by LunaCanisLupus_22. Sentient house is in Part 5 and isn't very friendly.)

The Foul Rag and Bone Shop of the Heart by WritersAreLiars M. 35k. 6/? “Stiles. Did I just watch you sell that man a hex-bag full of crushed caffeine pills and rocks from our own parking lot?” // “I threw in some sage too.” // -Stiles may have lost his job and his place as Alan's Mastery student, but at least his former teacher had the decency to set up an introduction to Peter Hale, werewolf and necromancer. // It looked like Stiles wasn't as done forming impossible infatuations on his teachers as he thought. // (At least this time he's legal.)

Entirely delightful and unique... author creates a fantastic world and Stiles' blithe abandon of traditions works very well with Peter's scheming. Worth reading even if it's never finished.

You Only Live Once...or Twice by WonderWolf E. 33k. Complete. “Anything,” Derek’s eyes are determined, boring into Stiles’.Stiles huffs a laugh, “Careful there, big guy. Don’t want to be promising anything to every necromancer you meet. Some might ask for your soul or someth—” // “I’ll give you my soul to bring her back,” Derek says, his voice steady and strong with resolve, “if that’s what you want.” // Stiles’ mouth gapes open for a moment before his brain kicks into gear and he stutters out, “N-no, I don’t ask for that. I only ask for money.” // (Or the one in which Stiles is a necromancer who needs help stopping a rogue alpha and Derek is the solution, but at what cost?)

Interesting premise.

Red String verse by gryvon E. 13k. Completed works, incomplete series. Peter had given up hope of ever finding his soulmate until the red string on his finger leads him to a four-year-old. He's going to Hell. Or jail. Or both.

Everything about this series is perfection. How Peter is so utterly astonished and appalled at the age difference. How Stiles turns out to be tremendously and precociously magic. The sexual tension when Stiles gets tired of waiting (and Peter goes to the station to turn himself in, lol.

Those Are The Days That Bind Us by s_a_m M. 63k. Completed works, incomplete series. His father wasn’t stupid. He was an officer of the law, trained to look for patterns. He confronted Stiles about werewolves and they shouted and Stiles tried to explain but his father was so, so, so mad, more mad than Stiles had ever seen him, ever in all his life and then his father looked at him and said,“It’s like you’re not my son anymore.” // And Stiles broke.

Really good. Poor bb Stiles, life generally sucks hard. When he leaves, he has a lot of adventures and new friends that I DON'T instinctively dislike (what can I say, I'm very loyal to my OTP: I generally hate it when they split up and one of them seems to move on). There's VERY little Derek in this, even though about 50% of the story is in Beacon Hills both before and after the 7 years of running away. Maybe part 3 will have a little more Sterek. But, yeah, Stiles is badass, so that's awesome. The author writes well and the story moves quickly.

Professional Werewolf Witch by reptilianraven G. 5k. Complete. "Are you going to buy anything else?" Professional Eyebrows says and Stiles would like to buy him. A cup of coffee. On a date. // He just ends up pointing at the crate of whatever the fuck is behind Professional Eyebrows' head and says, "Uh, a box of that stuff." // P.E. turns, glances at the crate, and raises an eyebrow at Stiles. "You want a box of charmed rattlesnake tail?" God, magic is so fucking weird. // "Yeah." Stiles nods because he's making an ass out of himself. The hipster vampire browsing in the corner is not so subtly laughing at him. The sooner he leaves the better. // -The one where Derek Hale is a Professional Werewolf Witch who owns a magic shop and Stiles fails at being smooth on a regular basis.

so fucking funny

I Know Where Babies Come From, Derek by DiscontentedWinter M. 52k. Complete. Stiles finds a baby on the porch.It looks exactly like him. // Well, this is awkward.

Funny and unique and gripping (and there's one part that's simply fucking heartbreaking, god every.time. I bawl like a baby). I love this so much. It's totally one of my return-again-and-again-comfort-fics (even though there's very little that's slow-paced and domestic about it).

When sparks fly by LunaCanisLupus_22 E. 87k. Completed stories, unfinished series, but that doesn’t matter. “Derek,” Stiles thunders. “Were you ever going to tell me your house is trying to hook us up?” // Derek's head snaps up, eyes wide and scenting the evident crackle of magic in the air. // Or the one where spark!Stiles moves into an enchanted apartment block owned by a grumpy alpha and is completely oblivious to the building's efforts to matchmake them.

OH, golly, I love this, it's so funny and fabulous and unique and THE HOUSE, GOD, I LOVE THE HOUSE, it really is all up in everybody's business. Don't worry about the chapters x/? Each chapter is its own complete storyline, so feel free to jump in any time, you'll never feel like you've been left hanging. I absolutely LOVE the irreverent (and yet, very well-conceived and detailed) urban fantasy vibe. And I love every character just the way I like to.

(Just read another fic with a sentient house (fifth story) and urban fantasy tones: Of Werewolves and Tentacles by Guede, which was a delight.

Untamed by rosepetals42 T. 28k. Complete. Of course, the transfer kid gets mentioned because transfers are rare, but the news isn’t that exciting. In fact, according to Laura, no one even seems to know his first name. The only thing anyone has really figured out about him is that he’s American. And that’s not exactly hard because he obviously has an accent. // The only thing Derek really knows is that, despite other reports, he seems quiet enough, prefers to work alone, and has the most amazing shade of amber eyes that Derek has ever seen. // Not that he’s looking. Obviously. // OR: A Harry Potter AU where Stiles is a Slytherin transfer student and Derek is the grumpy Gryffindor who falls in love with him. // There are also potions, elves, and falcons involved. Oh, and illegal use of magic. Obviously.

Best. This is the best Hogwarts/Teen Wolf AU I've ever read, hands down. All the feels.

A Wild Heart's Desire by mikkimouse T. 13k. Complete. If there's one thing Stiles Stilinski knows, it's that Deputy Derek Hale absolutely Does Not Like him. The only reason Derek even tolerates him is because their kids are worryingly codependent. // So Stiles is understandably confused when a very feral Derek shows up in his backyard after a call gone wrong and proceeds to move in with him.

Aw, feral!Derek is so sweet. And so is Stiles. And both of them are hella oblivious.

A Life for a Life, Makes the Whole Wo rld Bound by augopher M. 91k. Complete. Stiles was lonely; there was no other way of putting it. The Nogitsune had left the pack a wary of him, not that they thought it had been his fault. No, they worried it would happen again. Once bitten, twice shy. // The morning after his 18th birthday, his torso was covered in mysterious green tattoos. He hadn’t been that drunk. He'd definitely remember that. Great. Something else to make him feel like a freak. Insomnia led him to his mother’s diary and a tale of how she helped an odd man once who gave her the warning, “Be careful of your wishes three." Everything clicked into place. // So...he was a djinni. He subtly changed things about himself. More muscle? Done. Better hair? Done and done. End his crippling insecurity? Done, done, done. He hid his new gift until he found himself bound to Derek. // With Deaton’s help, they translated meanings in his tattoos, but they were incomplete. A passage of his 'Rules and Regulations' was missing. Everything was fine dandy until Stiles’ new powers and penchant for mischief and karmic retribution threatened to destroy him, fracture his mind, and turn him into something which couldn’t be contained. // Could the pack save him in time, and at what price?

Court of the Bitter King by The Feels Whale (miscellea) T. 7k. Incomplete series, but that’s okay. There’s a reason Stiles refuses point-blank to take off his shirt in public. That reason would be the massive number of …somewhat illegal tattoos he’s had done over the years. // It’s not that his dad doesn’t know about the tattoos, it’s more that his dad doesn’t like to think about them. It’s a mom thing or more precisely, it’s a ‘mom’s side of the family’ thing and Stiles’ maternal relatives make his dad very, very nervous.

Interesting. Dreamy and a little surreal. Third part is unfinished, but then, so are dreams, often.

The Time Travelling Werewolf's Confused Spirit Guide by The Feels Whale (miscellea) G. 5k. Complete.

Normally you don’t imagine yourself as living in the dystopian future that hapless time travelers accidentally stumble into. // Or: that one where Stiles learns the hard way that reality is not static, time is not a river, and sometimes the way things are is not the way they were supposed to be.

Sweet and weird. And it all worked out in the end, but I'd miss asshole Derek.

Her Blood on His Bones by secondstar E. 123k. Complete. Stiles may be cursed but that doesn’t mean he’s going to lay down and die. He’s going to fight. He won’t stop, he can’t stop. If he does, they win. [Daemons, Dark Materials universe.]

Aching for you by LittleRedEmissary T. 45k. Complete. When Stiles tries to cast a protection spell on Derek and accidentally casts a spell much stronger than either of them expected, the duo has to relearn everything that they've learned about protecting the pack, because the old methods won't do anymore. With the infamous Winchesters coming to town Derek hopes that the hunters will just drive through town, but the pack has never been good that laying low.

Love this. God, Dean's an asshole. But he gets better.

Writ in Hecate's ink on willing skin by Lenore M. 6k. Complete. "As you're always so fond of pointing out, you're the alpha. When bad shit happens to you, it affects all of us. If someone wants to use your alpha mojo or your wolf force or," Stiles waves his hand, "whatever you want to call it for diabolical purposes? We need to be ready."

Beacon Hills Mysteries by miss_aphelion T. 80k. Complete. Stiles appears alone at the doors of the emergency room the morning after the full moon, covered in blood with a deep slash torn across his left side. He's suffering from hypovolemic shock and barely conscious and he won't tell anyone what happened—not his hospital appointed psychiatrist, not his father. Not even his pack. // The list of suspects is disconcertedly short. There were only seven others in the woods with Stiles that night: Derek, Scott, Boyd, Erica, Isaac, Jackson and Allison. And none of them remember the night in quite the same way.

My note for the second story: Whoa, so intense and stressful and simply amazing. Really, this whole series is the bomb. (Even with no sex!) And super!magic!Stiles like whoa.

Patterns of Intention by drunktuesdays E. 17k. Complete. Derek looked like the stuff of his deepest fantasies. His shirt was rumpled where Stiles had his hands in it, and he was breathing hard as well, chest heaving. His eyes—his eyes were glazed over and he looked stunned, like he’d been—like Stiles had—“No,” Stiles said, blood draining from his face. The word was croaky and felt like it had to be wrenched out of his chest. “God, no.”

The one where Stiles' magic is expressed verbally, and he starts to think he magically is making Derek want him back.

No spell quite like your smile by charimiel T. 29k. Complete. "I’m Stiles by the way. I’d shake your hand, but the stuff on my hands isn’t actually ink and I don’t want to subject anyone else to that.” .... Derek’s really just exuding an aura of ‘what the fuck is wrong with this guy’. Stiles gets that a lot actually.OrThe one where Stiles owns a magic shop and Derek probably regrets coming back to Beacon Hills right about now.

Cute.

From Here On by Isa_Iadel M. 97k. Completed stories, incomplete series. Stiles Stilinski hasn't been Sheriff for very long and dealing with the aftermath of the attack against the Hales ends up being far more complicated than he ever could have imagined.

Crazy good story, incredible and original world building (really, SO original), and Stiles is magic! to the max and totally wonderful protector of the town and all the characters, OCs and those well-loved, are just amazing. (Derek is underdeveloped, which is a pity, but everyone else is so riveting that it's alright.) Can't wait for the next installment.

B.S.T.P.H.T. by dornfelder E. 27k. Complete. Before Derek has the presence of mind to object, Stiles pushes the paper in his hands and makes for his jeep. “Just read it, okay?” is the last thing he says before slamming the door shut. // He starts the engine, and drives away in record time with gravel scrunching under his tires while Derek stands there dumfounded. He accelerates unusually fast, and the jeep’s back lights disappear into the night.What. The. Fuck.

dream-walker by hoars E. 5k. Complete. This is not the behavior Stiles was expecting from a werewolf he’s been dream invading. To be honest, Stiles expected more blood, bruises and begging. He was not expecting creepy Derek to go to sleep next to him.

Vision without action is just a dream. by Mynuet T. 17k. Complete. Vision without action is merely a dream. Action without vision just passes the time. Vision with action can change the world. (Joel Barker) // Stiles has never known how to leave things well enough alone. If the root of their unhappiness is Derek losing the love of his life, then that's the problem Stiles is going to fix, no matter what it takes. He probably should have realized that things never go according to plan."

Perfect!

How I Met My Werebunny by Moku T. 20k. Complete. “This is going to end in tears,” Scott told Derek while he watched the man easily lifting Stiles’ desk up with one hand and driving nails into the ceiling with the thumb of the other. “Probably mine.” // Or:When a Stiles and a Failwolf love each other very much, they’ll engage in a prank war. Basically, it's a mating ritual for dorks in love.

So precious!

Shakespeare Was a Wolf by mommymuffin Unrated. (I’d rate it an M.) 40k. (Incomplete series, but that’s fine.) Derek gets turned into a wolf by a witch. Naturally, he expects Stiles to fix it.

“To say that Stiles flailed before he hit the ground in the most spectacular display of falling down the world has ever seen would be a gross understatement.”

Spark by rispacooper M. 10k. Complete. Derek had never actually seen Stiles in his full dragon form. If he was being honest with himself, he wasn’t sure he wanted to. The first time Derek had properly met Stiles, spoken with him, he’d had a hard time not reacting to the heat of him, far too reminiscent of the lick of flames at Derek’s skin. Dragons exuded heat, Derek had known that, intellectually. They might look like cold-blooded reptiles but they were creatures of fire.

Derek did not have good memories of fire. Stiles couldn’t have been expected to remember that, but it hadn’t helped that he’d focused on Derek with those impossibly wide eyes of lustrous brown and then let out of a puff of marijuana-scented breath and announced he’d take Derek instead of a sandwich.

Lord knows it would be the first time by uraneia E. 12k. Complete. Stiles is home from Berkeley for the summer, but only because he promised the pack. He'd rather not see Derek, because whatever the thing was that they were doing, they're not doing it anymore, and it sucks. // Unfortunately, he doesn't have a choice. The betas tried a magical remedy for Derek's melancholy, and now Stiles has a three-year-old who looks like Derek. Stiles doesn't know how to deal with that, and he definitely doesn't know how to tell the betas he and Derek were secret fuck buddies for a year and a half.

Another kidfic: ending has a nice twist.

Of Bananas, Babies and Buzzkills by calrissian18 T. 25k. Complete. “Are you, um—What are you doing back?” He looks as uncomfortable as Stiles feels and that’s some small consolation.“You know, the usual. Witches, I’m the highlander now, magic bananas.”

Oh, god, the one where Stiles magics up Protozooey, and he's SOO CUTE.

I was a little disappointed in the ending (little rushed), but ALL the rest of it is so delicious it's ok.

(Once in a) Blue Moon by clarkoholic, skywardsmiles E. 60k. Complete. Stiles and Derek are getting along, but they’re not a family, and they’re sure as hell not mates. Christ, they’re basically just two stupid guys who happened to get pregnant because of a full moon and sheer dumb luck.

Oh, the angst, the pining, the guilt, the blame, the anger. Total pain-fest while we watch Stiles nearly die from the burden of the pregnancy. Lovely sweet ending, of course.

A Heart is a Heavy Burden by lielabell T. 41k. Complete. In Which Stiles: is accosted by unhappy witches, becomes friends with fire demons, is rescued by darkly handsome wizards, discovers hidden inner depths, is introduced to princes, and finds true love. Though not necessarily in that order. // (Or the Howl’s Moving Castle AU fusion fic you never knew you wanted but are delighted to have.)

Hale's Moving Castle. (I need say no more.) -- not magic!Stiles, but wizard!Derek is just as good.

Haven't Forgotten My Way Home by tryslora E. 101k. Complete. Stiles walked away from Beacon Hills and never planned on coming home. Now he needs help, and there's nowhere else he can go other than back to his childhood home and the pack he left behind.

Great story: intricate, suspenseful and unique. It stands well on it's own, no need to read others in the series if you don't want to.

Stiles, why is Derek Hale passed out on our front porch? bymarguerite_26, mothlights E. 4k. Complete. Stiles doesn't hear the knock on his front door, but he figures there must have been one, because now his dad's calling out to him, "Stiles, do you know why Derek Hale just passed out on our front porch?" // Stiles freezes, carton of milk half way to his mouth. He looks around the empty room, wondering if it has any answers. Derek Hale just passed out on his front porch -- sounds like one of the signs of the coming apocalypse.

Breathe Me by mommymuffin Unrated (I’d give it T or M) 127k. Complete.

Stiles tries desperately, but the air just won’t come to him. He can’t do it himself. He needs someone. Someone to help him.

And Scott left him.

Fabulous series. Starts as a kind of one-shot, just Stiles-Derek-panic attack, but then the author, lo, encounters plot, and what a plot it is. I love this one, it's fast, doesn't stint on violence, the whole second half is one stressful situation after another, and there is Cor, the amazing wolf made out of the blood spilled between Stiles and Derek, which is a concept I haven't encountered before.

I would rate it an T or an M... there's sex, but it's not described in any detail.

Last Call by grimm E. 6k. Complete. He doesn’t come to The Beacon to pick up people. It’s precisely the reason why he doesn’t go anywhere else. People in this neighborhood know him, know he’s not interested in being hit on, which allows him to have a drink in peace. Derek knows he’s good-looking, but the type of people it attracts disgust him. At least other werewolves can smell the unfriendliness on him and stay away, but that doesn’t stop everyone. He went to a gay bar with his coworker Isaac once and it was horrifying.

Dragon's Breath by trilliath E. 56k. Complete. Between the hunters and the monsters that have interfered with life in Beacon Hills, the pack has had to learn a lot in the last few years, including Stiles teaching himself to practice magic in private. It's not exactly a secret from the pack, but it's not something he's shown much. When it comes time to put his skills to the test, Derek is the only one who finally gets to see Stiles's wild magic put to use saving Erica's life from a new threat in town. // The aftermath changes something between them, and those tenuous lines tangling them together may mean the difference between life and death for them both.

Lovely, vivid and intense.

In Sanguinem Scriptum Est by secondstar E. 31k. Complete. In order to stop a new onslaught of nightmares from plaguing him, Stiles decides to become an emissary. No longer defenseless, he begins to realize that not everything is as it seems.

Strut on a Line, its Discord and Rhyme by xiaq T, 73k.

“Carry me,” Stiles says. // “No.” // “But I’m injured.” // “You have a rash,” Derek says. “On your arm. Your feet work just fine.” // “Please?” // “No. You weigh almost as much as I do. And you ate a pound of chicken at lunch.” // "Well, yeah, but I pooped like an hour ago, so.” // “You’re disgusting.” // “Don’t play, you love me.” // I do, Derek thinks, relatively horrified. I really do.

Oh, wow, this was so fun: such a fast read, it just never lagged for a moment. Not that it's action-packed, because it isn't, but just because the story is so interesting and kept moving right along. Lots of OCs in this (Paidrag, Teagan, Walsh) and they're fully realized and wonderful. Stiles is a human adopted into a wolf pack that's been slaughtered a year earlier, and Derek and his dad are in Beacon Hills to help him recover from an extended kidnapping from demons. Both of them are young (fifteen and later sixteen), so their interactions start out innocent. Stiles is his usual self: brash and loud and weirdly confident in himself. Derek is shy and quiet. They make a good pair. Scott is the big brother who is suddenly a guardian. I pretty much loved every part of this: especially how Stiles magic just got stronger and stronger.

The Walls Are Breathing In by secondstar E. 42k. Complete. Nothing could go wrong. It was just supposed to be a safe trip to the Nemeton. But this is Beacon Hills and things are rarely that simple. Welcome to the life of Stiles Stilinski. // Or, that time that Stiles accidentally became a sorcerer against his will.

good story, and I loved the art (great colors)

Out Of Milk... by 74days M. 88k. Complete. Derek Hale moved in with the Stilinskis after acting a hero, much to Stiles distress. However, things take a turn for the strange when his arrival coincides with some strange happenings in Stiles life - that will change the course of the pack forever.

Sooooo magic!Stiles. EXCELLENT story. The angst is strong in this one...

Salutations or Something by ravingrevolution E. 155k. Complete. He needed an actual hobby outside of work where he would interact with actual people who did not live with him or talk to him through the internet or his phone. // Like yoga? His stupid mind supplied in an annoyingly accurate imitation of Scott’s voice. // Stiles sighed. // Like yoga. // “Fuck.”

"He was pretty sure that before he started doing yoga his life had not been an action movie sub-plot, but apparently things had changed. He really would have preferred to have starred in a romantic comedy, but he didn’t often get what he wanted." (Spark Stiles)

What I Did On My Summer Vacation by grimm E. 119k. Complete. There's something weird about Beacon Hills that Stiles can't quite put his finger on. The way everyone in town knows his name the day he arrives. The way they insist the melancholic howling that echoes through the forest every night is just a dog. The way his dad denies getting a dog, even though Stiles comes home to find one sprawled across his bed, some big black thing whose eyes gleam red in the right light. The way that massive oak tree out in the woods vibrates under his touch, pulsing with sickly life. // There's something weird going on in this town, and Stiles is determined to get to the bottom of it.

hope is the thing with feathers by ShanaStoryteller T. 29k. Complete. Stiles is ten when he saves the Hales from their burning home and Derek from a wolfsbane bullet, and this establishes a pattern that seem to continue indefinitely."Then he's facing a burning home, and he wraps the hood of his sweatshirt around his mouth before he pushes the door open and steps inside. There's Mr. Hale asleep - he hopes asleep - on the couch, next to - Stiles thinks that's his brother but there are so many Hales, who can keep track. He rushes over and starts shaking him, can see the rise and fall of the man's chest so he knows he's alive, but he's not waking up. // He shoves away his hood so he can shout, "Mr. Hale! You have to get up, there's a fire! Mr. Hale, get up!" Nothing, he's not even twitching, both of them taking in deep even breaths like they're having the most peaceful of rests, and Stiles is going to cry. "Wake up, wake up, wake up!" // There's a moment, where all Stiles can hear is the blood rushing in his ears and not the roar of the flames or the creak of wood, then with a violent, silent pop it's all back and both of the men are gasping awake, eyes open and jumping to their feet. "

This is awesome: It starts when Stiles is ten, and he finds himself drawn int the woods in time to pull the Hales from their burning house, and much magic is used on that day, and lo, Stiles is an extremely powerful mage. For all that he's very brave and snarky, he's also very laid-back, and so he rolls with the punches and allows himself to be adopted (more or less) into the Hale clan, even tho they're very, very weird. So for the next five years, he tags along, fights the good fight, discovering new powers along the way, grows a bond with Derek (who hates words, and hates feelings and hates combining the two even worse), keeps his oldest and bestest friend Scott (who is similarly chill about the whole thing), and just blossoms before your eyes. It's fabulous. (So is the whole series.)

Beltane by DevilDoll E. 8k. Complete. "Watching Stiles heal someone has always been a little uncomfortable for Derek, like he's seeing something intimate and private that shouldn't have an audience. That's nothing compared to how it feels." This is an AU in which Stiles has magical healing powers.

Taking Leave by coyotl M. 91k. Complete. Stiles leaves. It's not like he wanted to, ever, but he had to. Sure, there were choices, always. It's just that, sometimes, all the choices were bad ones.

fucking fantastic. stiles resembles a gaiman-esque saint or a god or something, on a dubiously moral killing spree for half the story. the writing is magical and gripping, and the story moves fast: gritty and bloody and unapologetic. unique and lovely.

Didn’t See That Coming by knittersrevolt E, 84k.

Stiles leaves Beacon Hills in the dust after he catches his husband cheating on him. // He finds his way to New York where he starts working for the Hale House Nursery, accidentally adopts a werewolf baby (through no fault of his own thank-you-very-much), and somehow starts training to be an Exorcist Emissary. So, in general, life was going good. // Then he hears that demons have found their way into his hometown. Can he face his inner demons and go back to save the day?

I love this story so much, it’s such a fast and engaging ride. Plus, accidental baby acquisition, who doesn’t love that? The one where Scott's a cheating jerk so Stiles basically runs away to upstate New York and gets a job at Hale's Nursery Preschool with Laura, and after a few months finds a woman giving birth in an alley, takes her to the hospital, and comes home with her baby when she dies. Her werewolf baby (not that Stiles has any idea about that). So now Stiles is the proud single parent of baby Sam. He eventually moves in with Derek (because a hotel is no place for a newborn and Derek has an extra room). Things develop over the next few months, and then the Alpha Pack shows up and Peter starts acting suspiciously. Meanwhile, Stiles is getting magic lessons from Mee-Mee, who is a Demon Puller in addition to being the local supernatural pediatrician and druid.

They discover that a demon escaped the Alpha Pack and went to Beacon Hills -- along with Peter and the twins he kidnapped -- so Derek and Stiles have to pack up and follow it, right on the heels of his dad and Scott, who hired a private detective to find him. Beacon Hills is interesting, Stiles starts up a body shop selling (magical) creams and ointments and navigates the social waters of a town who seemed not to care that he was cheated on.

Stand Fast in Your Enchantments by DevilDoll, Rahciach E. 77k. Complete. "Stiles knew damn well what a pissed-off wolf sounded like, and every hair on the back of his neck was telling him that somewhere in this room was a very pissed-off werewolf." // An AU in which Derek is feral, Stiles is magical, and they eat a lot of fast food.

Love this one so much!

#Teen Wolf fic rec #Sterek fic rec #mage Stiles #magic Stiles #magical Stiles #fic recs #I spent WAAAYY too long on this #spark Stiles #spark stiles rec list #magic stiles rec list

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baobeejun · 5 years

Photo

Wizard Woozi ✨✨✨✨⭐⭐🌙🌙 for @chanstrology 💕💕

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calamariikid · 6 years

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it is done

#i spent waaayy too long in front of the computer hunched over my tablet holy shit #but i have a new icon!#so yay!#i'm not even that happy with it #but i'm getting better at digital so that's good #also tumblr downgraded the quality a shit ton what a surprise #also yes. it's me in my god tier out fit okay. i'm a hero of space #of course i am tho #the outfits are all black #noah rambles

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male-fanfics-for-days · 4 years

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Pierced By Cupid

Tsukishima x Reader

A/n: I may have spent waaayy too much time on this one, so sorry if it seems like it was dragging on. Tsukki is a charater I went from hating to loving mostly bc I relate to him so much. Anyway, enough on that!! This has not be prof read so sorry for mistakes!!

ENJOY!!

EDIT: I made a part 2 which you can find here! The Jealous Type

At first, he didn’t really notice. He wasn’t looking for anything so there was no reason he really would have noticed, but when he did he was actually shocked by how he didn’t notice before.

A boy, only what he could guess was an inch shorter than Nishinoya with h/c hair and his school jacket off, was in his class studying at the time. Not surprising, however, it was a college prep class. But it was the way the boy kept glancing up at the clock that got Tsukishima’s attention, bouncing his feet and twirling his pencil in his hand while seemingly only somewhat paying attention to his studies.

The only reason Tsukishima was at all looking at the boy was because he was annoying, the boy just wouldn’t stop moving which reminded him of a certain ginger boy the made him groan in his head, prying to any god that he didn’t believe in that this boy wasn’t like the short, excitable spiker on his volleyball team.

Somehow, he got vibes that this boy was different, though he didn’t want to jump to a calming conclusion.

Soon the bell rang and he stood from his desk as it was time for him to get ready for the after-school volleyball club activities. The boy he was watching before, despite seeming anxious to get out of class, was calm in collecting his things. He put away his notebooks and pencils in a neat and orderly fashion, setting them all gently in his shoulder bag that looked brand new.

“Tsukki?”

Tsukishima blinked a few times, refocusing and looking down at his long time friend, who was staring up at him in confusion.

“What?” Was Tsukishima’s blunt response, starting to put away his own things as well, which were not much.

“You were drifting is all,” Yamaguchi muttered out, looking around the room as the other students left. “You were pretty far gone too.”

“The guy who sits behind you wouldn’t stop moving.” Tsukishima replied honestly, adjusting his headphones on his neck and making his way out of the room, Yamaguchi following by his side.

“The guy behind me?” Yamaguchi thought out loud, looking to the ceiling as they both made their familiar path to the club room to change. “You mean L/n-san?”

“I don’t know his name,” Tsukishima tisked, rolling his eyes while stuffing his hands in his pockets. “He was just moving so much and staring at the clock, it was annoying.”

“Hm, it’s probably because his petition for a club creation got accepted and it starts today.” Yamaguchi theorized, and despite his refusal to believe, Tsukishima found himself getting curious.

“... I didn’t think a first year would be allowed to do that.” He simply stated, both to keep the conversation going and to state a fact that he really didn’t know. Yamaguchi chuckled softly and nodded his head.

“Apparently it took a lot of convincing, both on L/n-san’s part and apparently his middle school teachers and a therapist.”

“And where did you hear all this?” Tsukishima prodded. Not to say he wasn’t interested in this tale, but it was an odd amount of information for his shy, freckled friend to have. “Gross, please don’t tell me you are gossiping now?”

“E-eh! N-No Tsukki!” He stammered, flustered. He waved a hand and looked up at Tsukishima. “The others in the class were talking about it while we were eating lunch… I wasn’t eavesdropping! They weren’t quiet about it!”

“What club did he want made, anyway?” Tsukishima swiftly changed the subject, much to the relief of Yamaguchi’s heart.

“Archery.”

“Archery?” Tsukishima echoed back, stopping his walking in the hallway just outside the door that led into the club room and gave Yamaguchi an inquisitive look. “Why archery?”

“I’m not sure,” Yamaguchi shrugged. “But, if it involved a therapist, he probably has a reason he likes archery.”

Tsukishima stood silent for a long moment in thought, which surprised Yamaguchi a small bit. Tsukishima was never one to show an interest in a subject that he wasn’t himself already interested in, but for him to be thinking about not only someone else, but what that someone else was interested in was like seeing a blue moon.

Finally Tsukishima gave a grunt and a shrug, opening the door to the club room and thereby bringing an end to that conversation.

--------------

The next day, Tsukishima found his gaze unwillingly going back to the boy from before. It seemed he wasn’t as anxious as before, though still bouncing his legs and twirling his pencil, he looked far more at peace today. Tsukishima wondered if it was because he got to do his archery club yesterday after school, like it was an itch that wasn’t satisfied until he had a bow and arrow in hand.

Tsukishima then began to wonder what that was like, to hold a bow and an arrow in hand, to release an arrow into a target several feet away from you. He’d never done it before so he let his mind wonder.

Was it fun? Did he get a lot of people to join the club? Is it like playing volleyball or like playing an instrument? What type of techniques does he do to hit the middle of the target with one clean release of a bow string?

The more he thought, the more his curiosity grew. He knew it was probably pretty obvious he was burning holes into the back of the boy's head, but he couldn’t help getting lost in his own head.

“Y/n-chan!”

A girl came bouncing into the classroom and Tsukishima was immediately annoyed, she was far too perky compared to the boy whose head raised at the sound of his name.

“Hello, Nachi-san… Why are you here?”

Tsukishima felt the corners of his mouth lift up at the boy, Y/n L/n’s, reactions. The girl gave a dramatic pout while placing her bento on his desk.

“We are supposed to be eating lunch together!”

Y/n looked up at the clock, then down to his desk, and then up at her before averting his eyes to the desk once more.

“I don’t remember saying that…”

“You don’t remember a lot of things.” She sassed back, putting her hands on her hips. Y/n glanced at her before bouncing his feet and twirling his pencil once more, the girl, Nachi, started to speak again.

“You also said we were going to study after school. I have a test coming up for math and you know how much I suck at math, really it’s as if it’s a whole other language. Speaking of language, we should study English together as well. You’re so go at it, I don’t think you have ever gotten below a 95%!”

As the girl rambled on with pointless conversation, Tsukishima could tell that Y/n wasn’t at all listening to what she was saying. It looked as if he just turned off his mind, eyes slowly drifting around the room, never on the or anyone for that matter. It was like he was seeing a different world before his eyes, and this was all while the girl continued to prattle on.

Tsukishima couldn’t stop the low chuckle that left his throat as he watched, the girl just now realizing that the boy she was speaking to had no idea she was even speaking in the first place.

“Y/n-chan!!”

Said boy flinched at her loudness, his hands going to his ears as he blinked rapidly at her, his brows frowning as she huffed at him.

“You were spacing out ag-”

“You should eat your bento before lunch ends.” Y/n dropped his hands to his desk, leg beginning to bounce once more as he looked at the clock. “I’ll be at archery after school, so I won’t be studying. Oh.”

Y/n then smiled at the girl, completely overseeing the fact that he cut her off and wasn’t listening to her.

“I bought a new bow yesterday with my father after the club, it is larger and is a more western type of bow. It has been really fun to use so far and I really can’t wai-”

“Did you even hear a word I said?”

The girl cut him off, glaring down at him with arms crossed. Y/n lost his smile and looked at her confused.

“When?”

“Just now!” She called out. “I was talking to you then you cut me off!”

“Oh…” Y/n’s joy that was once there faded quickly and he dropped his head in a bow. “I’m sorry… I didn’t mean to… I just had-”

“Never mind, Y/n-chan.” The girl sighed, shaking her head and picking up her bento. “I’ll go have lunch with my other friends.”

Y/n watched her leave silently, Tsukishima himself watching as well. He didn’t really understand it, but he was angry at the girl. Tsukishima himself was not someone with an overabundance of patience but even he could understand Y/n was not someone who could focus easily.

It was obvious that Y/n had a type of ADHD, the lack of focus on conversations, the constant moving, covering his ears with loud noises, interrupting mid sentence and rapid movement from topic to topic.

Despite all this Tsukishima was even more curious about the archery boy, and not for the reason he was before. Before he was curious on a basic level, why archery, why start a club, why so much movement, and so on. Now he knew more about it and was more curious on a deeper scale, why do archery if you had trouble focusing, why be in a college prep class that requires a lot of focus and study, why was it so difficult for him to start a club (despite the obvious fact of only being a first year).

Yamaguchi wasn’t at school for a family reason, as he had told Tsukishima threw a text, so when the day was through and time for him to go to his own club, Tsukishima found himself walking down the hall to a different gym then his usual.

It was went he heard solid swift thuds through the open door way of the gym that he found what he was looking for, in the blink of an eye, he saw arrows pass the view of the door then a satisfying thunk of the arrow finding its target.

Tsukishima stood in the entrance of the gym, looking from one side of targets to where the arrows were being shot from. Despite being in the view of Y/n, he was far too focused on the grip he had on the arrow and bow string to care about someone at the entrance of the gym.

He released the arrow with a breath out, and instead of a thunk deep into the target and Tsukishima expected, he instead he a snap and crack. Looking to the target, he allowed himself to be in shock.

The arrow just released had gone straight through the back of an already embedded arrow, leaving the first arrow split in two while the second arrow was stuck between the two split pieces.

“Wow, you’d better hope that’s not school property.” Tsukishima snickered, giving Y/n his ever famous smirk. Y/n looked a little shocked that anyone was there, let alone watching. He held his bow by his side, placing the arrow he was about to take out back in his quiver.

“It’s my own equipment.”

“Ah, so were you just trying to impress me?” Tsukishima continued to smirk, Y/n looked to the floor and shook his head before looking back up at Tsukishima.

“I didn’t know you were there… I don’t suppose you're here for the Archery Club?” Y/n mood seemed to shift from anxious to relaxed as he spoke the words archery, but Tsukishima shook his head.

“No, I’m on the volleyball team. I just came to see what the noise was, I’ll be leaving.”

He turned and walked away from the gym doors, his mind already thinking up an excuse for having to show up late for practice when he heard Y/n’s voice.

“You can come by anytime you want,” Tsukishima turned and looked at Y/n with a blank face, Y/n smiled a small corner smile. “The club was just made, so it’s only me. The teachers are going to find other students who want to join… Until then, it will just be me.”

Tsukishima and Y/n both stared at each other for a moment, Tsukishima not breaking his blank faced facade. He turned and walked away, throwing a comment over his shoulder before he fully walked away.

“We’ll see.”

---------------------

Y/n changed the times for his club, so instead of having it just after school he asked for the early morning as well, before school truly started. He was the time he set up so him and Tsukishima could spend more time with each other without Tsukishima getting in trouble for missing practice.

Their meetings have been happening for about 4 weeks, Yamaguchi formally meeting Y/n a week after Tsukishima had already been hanging out with the archer.

In such a time Tsukishima learned a lot about Y/n.

Archery was one of the only things that ever allowed Y/n to focus with an almost superhuman accuracy. It was also one of the ways he would study, more likely to remember the answers to a review if he nails a bullseye. Another thing he had learned was that Y/n was just as sarcastic as Tsukishima himself, the only difference is that Y/n never said it out loud.

Y/n had trouble with noise, specifically loud noises or the sound of multiple people talking at once. He once described the feeling to Tsukishima as he was cleaning his bow and arrows.

“When I hear a loud noise or a crowd of people, my whole body goes stiff. It started to become hard to breath and not matter how hard I try to block it out, I can’t move.”

Y/n sighed, letting the bow rest on his lap and on his crossed legs. He sat across from Tsukishima who was looking through Y/n’s notes, Tsukishima looking up at him pause.

“When that happens, I kinda… black out. My whole body suddenly feels like the energy was just sucked out of me,” Y/n looked at Tsukishima in the eyes as he gave a somewhat weak smirk. “I usually pass out when it happens.”

“... that sucks.” Tsukishima responded, Y/n giving him a blank look before rolling his eyes and standing.

“No shit, aren’t you supposed to be the smart one?”

Tsukishima smirked and looked up at the boy while raising a brow.

“Keep that attitude and I won’t let you eat my spare sweet bread.”

Y/n immediately turned back around, almost entirely forgetting he was supposed to be doing archery.

“WAIT YOU HAVE SWEET BREAD?!!?”

In the classroom, they simply acted as strangers. Not ignoring each other, but also not making a show of friendship. Tsukishima and Y/n both realized they were the same in that they didn’t really need to interact with each other constantly to know the other is still a friend.

Yamaguchi said how nice it was to see Tsukishima gain more friends, which Tsukishima quickly shot down as him not ‘making friends’ like a child. One of the reasons Tsukishima was quite upset with Yamaguchi about saying this was that he said it during volleyball which meant his other teammates heard it and were relentlessly teasing him.

Sure, he was good at dodging their questions and instead riling them up the way they tried with him, but his teammates genuinely wondered who this mysterious new friend of Tsukishima’s was.

None of them thought they would meet this friend today.

They were maybe 1/4th of their way into practice when they heard a soft voice call out to Tsukishima from the gyms door way, everyone in the gym turned their heads to see a short h/c boy standing with a shoulder bag over his shoulder, his uniform jacket around his waist and a grey notebook in his hand.

“Um… Tsukishima… You forgot your notebook in my gym.” Y/n held up the notebook as if to show proof of why he was interrupting their practice, he gave a deep bow to the coach and the other volleyball players. “Please excuse the intrusion.”

“You’re fine, kid.” Coach Ukai said, but the end of whatever he was going to say was drowned out by a few people Tsukishima never wanted meeting Y/n.

“Are you Tsukki’s new friend we’ve heard about?!” Tanaka called out, going straight up to Y/n who flinched a little at his loud voice, flinching more as Nishinoya jumped up and down next to him.

“Ah! You’re shorter than me!! I’m not the shortest anymore!!”

“You’re still the shortest on our team, however.” Tsukishima cut in, making his way over to Y/n who only relaxed a little more as Tsukishima stood next to him, taking the notebook.

Nishinoya was irked by Tsukishima’s comment, but it was Hinata that set off a bomb of questions aimed at the already slightly overwhelmed boy.

“OOOOHHH!!! You’re the first year that started the archery club, aren’t you!?!?”

“Uh… y-yea-”

“ARCHERY?!?! LIKE THE KIND SAMURAIS USE?!?”

“Well, not all the time but-”

“You’re the leader of that club right?? How many people have joined so far?”

“No-”

“Alright, calm down.”

Daichi tried and failed to calm the rambunctious trio, even Kageyama was muttering out questions. It took a moment to realize that this was what kind of chaos Y/n couldn’t listen to, and when Tsukishima looked down at the boy he could tell immediately he was not well.

His chest visibly stuttered, showing he was not breathing right, his skin went and lighter shade and his eyes were moving rapidly to each person who was talking and speaking over each other.

Tsukishima swiftly turned away and walked over to his extra school bag he brought with him, thanking his past self for finding a reason to bring it.

“Tsukki?” Yamaguchi softly called his friend, but Tsukishima was too focused on something else.

Tsukishima pulled out his headphones, an extra water bottle, his phone, and his black volleyball jacket. Standing back up and turning back to Y/n, who looked to be getting worse by the second, he put his plan to action.

Without even acknowledging the other people in the room, he put his headphones over Y/n’s head, placing them over his ears, plugging it into his phone and playing whatever music was available. He picked up Y/n’s hand and placed his phone in his grip, then put the water bottle in his other hand before putting one of his large hands over Y/n’s eyes, then glaring at the group that was round them.

Y/n leaned into Tsukishima’s hand that was over his eyes, his breathing slowly going back to normal, with puffs of air as he tried taking deep breaths.

“You’re all overwhelming him, idiots.” Tsukishima almost growled out, glaring at a specific four people. “Do any of you know what personal space is?”

He didn’t wait for a response as he took his hand off Y/n’s eyes and guided him to his bag, Y/n kept his eyes closed and took sips of the water before allowing Tsukishima to lower him to the ground next to his bag. Y/n curled his legs to his chest, putting the bottle beside him and clutching Tsukishima’s phone close to his chest, Tsukishima then placed his black jacket over Y/n like a cover, successfully blocking out the harsh gym lights.

Once he stood at full height, watching Y/n for a moment for any other signs of discomfort, he turned to his team and glared.

“If I knew you were all going to try and kill him, I would never have let you even know he existed, not that I wanted to in the first place.” His last comment was directed at Yamaguchi, who looked down.

“Gomen, Tsukki.”

“We didn’t try to kill him!!” Hinata cried out. “Will he be okay?!”

“Not if you keep yelling, you walking, human orange.” Tsukishima snapped, making Hinata irritated but covering his mouth.

Sugawara was the one that came over to Tsukishima, glancing down at the covered, curled up boy.

“Is he really okay? What was that?”

“He’s sense’s are hypersensitive. Like I said, he was overwhelmed.” Tsukishima replied, looking down at Y/n and sighing, before looking off somewhere else. “He’ll be fine, he just needs time to recover.”

“Would it be best for him to move to the club room then-”

“No.” Tsukishima quickly answered, cutting off Sugawara who seemed taken back by his quick answer. “Let’s just keep practicing. He’s fine here.”

There was a thick silence before Coach Ukai clapped his hands and told them to continue. Kiyoko and Yachi stood by Y/n as he hid away in Tsukishima’s jacket, making sure no stray volleyball hit him while he was recovering. The boys were also cautious of being too loud, especially Hinata, Tanaka, and Nishinoya, the loudest of their team.

Practice went on like normal and finished just the same, them all getting ready to change and go home. Tsukishima kneeled down in front of Y/n, who was still curled up and had his jacket over his head, and he slowly took the jacket from off him.

What he saw made his heart skip a bit in a way he never felt before.

Y/n had his arms crossed over his knees with his head laying on them, Tsukishima’s headphones still on his ears playing music while he slept peacefully. His cheek was pressed to his arms and his mouth was slightly one, little out tiny puffs of air.

He looked so small, so at peace. A peace Tsukishima has never seen on someone before, and watching his eyelashes flutter somewhat in his sleep as he dreamed, Tsukishima quickly realized what this feeling in his chest was and felt a heat rise to his face in response.

Slowly peeling his phone out of Y/n’s hand and taking his headphones back, he placed his hand on top of Y/n’s head and spoke softly to the sleeping boy.

“Hey, we’re leaving.”

Y/n didn’t stir for a moment, which made Tsukishima softly run his hand over Y/n’s head in a gentle pet to wake him up.

“Y/n.”

It was then that Y/n’s eyes fluttered open, Tsukishima moving his hand back to his side and watching as Y/n slowly woke up. He opened his mouth and let out a yawn, then lifted his arms over his head in a cat like scratch, letting his legs stretch out as well. He made little noises of someone just waking up, rubbing his eyes and he took in a deep breath, his eyes fluttering closed for a moment.

Tsukishima would first be found dead and as tall as Nishinoya before he would ever admit to thinking Y/n was currently the cutest being he has ever known and has ever existed, and he was really glad no one else was left in the gym to see it. He would never admit that he would have been jealous to know others saw Y/n’s cute display, to know that Y/n was like a plushy in human form.

“Your practice is over?” Y/n rasped out, his voice still soft from sleep.

To avoid being seen blushing, Tsukishima quickly went about packing his things.

“We are leaving now.”

“Oh… okay.”

---------------------------------

There was little to no talking among the two as Tsukishima changed and got ready, Yamaguchi had stayed in the club room to tell them both that the team was buying meat buns as an apology for what they did earlier.

Yamaguchi spoke with Y/n casually as they made their way down to their coach's store, Tsukishima only half listening to what they were saying, half thinking deeply to himself.

Did he really fall in love with this archer boy? Half of his mind reasoned with him that it wasn’t that surprising, seeing as they had a lot in common but they were also very different. That part of his mind admitted full force that he was in love and that he was allowed to have nice things like then.

Then came his logical side, with a list; they were both boys was the biggest, Tsukishima had never looked at guys romantically before, he knew Y/n for 4 weeks, outside of school he barely knew anything about Y/n outside of the small things he’s been told, Y/n himself doesn’t know much about Tsukishima since he never really made and effort to explain more about himself outside what he thought was needed, the team would probably never see him the same again, people in class would probably talk which was more annoying than anything.

He started thinking the same way he thought for volleyball, why try if it was going to end poorly, for both him and Y/n. Why risk all the bad things that could happen, no, that would happen.

‘I’m not in love’ He thought to himself conclusively looking down at the boys conversing next to him, but unfortunately for him, his heart had other plans.

Y/n had a tired smile that made his face shine in the most beautiful way, a gentle laugh leaving his chest as something Yamaguchi had said. His eyes squinting into crescent moons with crows feet wrinkling his slightly flushed cheeks, making them look soft in the moonlight. Then, he turned to look up at Tsukishima.

He knew at that moment that no matter how many times he would say it’s not true… he was pierced by this small cupid boy, and Tsukishima now knew what it felt like to be one of Y/n’s targets. Though, he was not complaining.

His eyes reflected the moon and were glossed in a still sleepy way, his eyes still crinkled at the corners and a smile now more soft than cloth could ever be. He was looking up at Tsukishima as if he had just handed him the earth and sky, and as dangerous as the feeling was, Tsukishima could feel in his chest that if Y/n asked for it, he would give him just that.

“I’m sorry if I made your practice more difficult, Tsukki.” Y/n said gently while shrugging his shoulder, unknowing of the effect of his voice and words on the tall boy's heart.

“... Tsukki?” Was the only thing that could leave his lips, his brain using every ounce of control it had not to turn into a blushing mess. He was so whipped for that small archer, and Y/n had no idea.

“Oh, sorry,” He bowed his head with a slight laugh. “Yama-san calls you that, so I thought I could as well.”

Tsukishima glanced over to his long time friend, who only gave a small chuckle in response.

“Mm.” Tsukishima didn’t risk his voice, knowing if he tried to say anything at the moment, he would in fact let loose that Y/n was more than welcome to call him anything.

“Oi! Tsukishima! Yamaguchi! Archer-san! Over here!”

The trio glanced up and saw the rest of the volleyball team outside the store, each eating a meat bun. Without knowing it, Tsukishima walked closer to Y/n’s side, and the only reason Y/n noticed was the warmth and was radiation off him.

They got closer and Daichi stepped forward, bowing to Y/n who became even more flushed then simply the evening air.

“I would like to formally apologize for overwhelming you before.”

The rest of the team bowed as well, making Y/n back up into Tsukishima, resulting in Tsukishima gently placing a hand on the small of his back.

“O-oh, it’s okay.” Y/n looked down and away, avoiding eye contact. “You’d be surprised how often that happens to me, I’m just glad Tsukki got to me before I collapsed.”

“Eh?! Would you have died?!” Hinata exclaimed in sheer worry, but flinched after seeing Y/n flinch himself from the loud tone of his voice. Hinata was hit in the head by Kageyama, who scowled at him.

“You’re too loud, boke.”

“Ugh! I--” Hinata was about to yell as just a natural reaction when talking to the dark haired setter, but glancing at Y/n who was slowly starting to hide behind Tsukishima, he growled low and glared at the ground. “...I know that.”

“Here,” Asahi came over to Tsukishima, Yamaguchi, and Y/n, handed them a bag filled with meat buns. “I got one for each team member and two for...eh...uhm.”

Asahi had to peek around Tsukishima’s back, everyone now noticing that Y/n basically hiding behind Tsukishima and staying close to his back while watching everyone. Y/n blushed and stuttered.

“E-eh, my names L/n Y/n.”

“L/y-kun.” Asahi finished, smiling shyly back at Y/n who gave one as equal.

Though it would go unnoticed as Tsukishima going into the bag to grab a meat bun held by Yamaguchi, what it really was was Tsukishima blocking everyone's view of Y/n.

Sugawara spoke next, smiling at everyone.

“As nice as it would be to get to know L/y-san, we have early practice tomorrow and it's getting colder.”

“Right,” Daichi said, “Tomorrow morning will be one by one training seeing what each of us can work on, so get well rested.”

“Yes sir!!”

Tsukishima gave the meat bun bag to Y/n and covered his ears, everyone else sheepishly looked on and replied again more quietly.

Yamaguchi said he needed to go to the grocery store to get a few things for his mother before he went home, so he told Tsukishima and Y/n to go without him. This left the two boys to walk home together, alone.

Y/n quietly munched on the meat buns while they walked, unknowingly shivering as he stared up at the evening sky, then to the buildings around in a distracted way. Tsukishima didn’t really know what his plan was, but he stopped Y/n from walking with an arm in front of him.

Y/n bumped into his arm, not seeing it before, then looked up at Tsukishima.

“What’s wrong?”

“You were going to trip over that.” Both Tsukishima and Y/n looked down and saw a large branch from a nearby tree in the way, Y/n went to pick it up but Tsukishima just used his foot to kick it out of the way.

He then began taking off his jackets and placing it on Y/n’s shoulders.

“You are also shivering.” Tsukishima looked ahead, acting as if this was no big deal. But he caught a glimpse of Y/n snuggling into his jacket more and had to look away, a silent cuss mouthing from his lips.

“Thank you, Tsukki.” Y/n said, continuing to munch on his snacks. “If I didn’t know any better, I’d say you were being nice to me.”

Tsukishima, stopped walking, in turn making Y/n stop walking and look up at him. Tsukishima then places the back of his hand on Y/n’s forehead, Y/n himself looking on in pure confusion.

“Uh… Tsukki-”

“If you think I’m being nice, you must be sick.”

Y/n snorted and let out a hearty laugh, swiftly swatting away Tsukishima’s hand and stomping down the road like a child, all while Tsukishima hid a smile behind a smirk.

“You’re dumb.”

“Wow,” Tsukishima snarked, walking next to Y/n and looking down at him with his signature smirk. “Did you think of that one all by yourself? I’d say I’m proud but, I don’t care.”

Y/n laughed again, shaking his head, not noticing the look of pure admiration Tsukishima was staring at him with.

Despite the nervousness he felt of his feelings being found out, Tsukishima felt as if their conversation was as smooth as any. It wasn’t forced or uncomfortable, Y/n laughed freely and comfortably while Tsukishima joked and sent sarcasm his way. He would have thought that after knowing how attracted he was to the boy, he would have stopped being natural or at least would not be talking as much as he was at the moment.

But everything with Y/n was natural, as natural as the moon is to the stars. Their conversations switched and changed often, though Tsukishima felt no irritation as the excited glimmer in Y/n out weighed any negative thoughts.

Tsukishima hadn’t even really realized it until he and Y/n stopped in front of a house, that he was walking Y/n home and this was where they went their separate way.

Y/n neatly folded the bag that was now empty of meat buns and put it in his pocket, slowly taking off Tsukishima’s jacket and handing it back to him.

“Here, thanks again for letting me use it. And it was nice to meet your team.”

Tsukishima took his jacket back, flushing slightly at touching Y/n's hand and looking off.

“Even despite the fact they almost made you pass out.”

“Well, in truth they did make me pass out, but luckily you were there so I didn’t collapse and make a fool of myself.”

“I don’t think that is what makes you a fool, Y/n.”

Y/n puffed up his cheeks and slightly hit Tsukishima’s arm, Tsukishima not feeling anything and just smiling it off. Y/n turned to his house and walked to his door, not wanting their fun to end but they would see each other again tomorrow.

Knowing they would be together again tomorrow, even for a short while, made Y/n’s chest swell with joy.

“Y/n.” Y/n had just put his hand on the door handle when he heard Tsukishima’s voice.

“Yeah, Tsukk--”

He turned to face Tsukishima, but he didn’t expect him to be so close. Practically pushed up against the door, Y/n looked up only in time for Tsukishima to lower his head and made their lips touch.

Y/n’s eyes immediately fluttered shut at the warmth that suddenly filled him body, the smell of Tsukishima intoxicating him just as his jacket had been for so long.

In truth, if it were anyone else, Y/n would not have calmed down so quickly, he would not have felt comfortable enough to fall asleep just anywhere, he would not have felt comfortable letting just anyone touch him the way Tsukishima had.

And in return, Tsukishima didn’t know anyone that made him open up as fast as Y/n did, not even Yamaguchi, his childhood friend. He had always been closed off and unwilling to put his whole heart into things, with fear of failure, heart break, rejection. But through this kiss, through connecting his lips to Y/n’s, he was saying that his heart was open to Y/n and only Y/n. Somehow, through the 4 weeks of knowing one another, it was like cupid's arrow was destined to pierce them both.

They pulled apart, the breath mixing as they stayed close, the lips brushing over each other as they soaked in what had happened.

“Kei.” Tsukishima’s voice came out in a hushed tone, one that made Y/n swoon.

“Wha--”

“If we are going to be together,” He continued, standing straight and looking down at Y/n’s flushed face with a smile. “Call me Kei.”

Y/n stood in shock, but as many things in his head, he was quick to smile back and Tsukishima. He allowed his heart to swell with the only thought of the tall boy with glasses and a sarcastic attitude, Tsukishima too allowing his mind, body, and soul to be only filled with the short, just as funny, archer boy who stole his heart in record time.

“Well… goodnight then… Kei.”

“Goodnight, Y/n.”

#haikyuu x male reader #haikyuu!!#tsukishima x reader #x male reader #tsukishima x male reader #tsukishima kei #haikyuu x reader

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pinetrce · 7 years

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{ pet peeve: People who say “you have to read my rules” but make their rules page impossible to find }

#{ I don't mind requiring rule reading; I do that too! }#{ but for fuck's sake don't HIDE your rules page }#{ I just spent waaayy too long trying to navigate someone's theme }#{ tried guessing the rules link too }#{ nothing }#{ is your minimalist aesthetic REALLY THAT IMPORTANT? }#{ u g h }#🌲 Out Of Mysteries — (ooc)

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captainsy-cookiemonster · 3 years

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Okay. You have to marry Walter or Sy. But Walter will never lend you his sweaters, ever, and it turns out Sy is a foot fetishist. Who do you choose?

Walter. His sweaters would be waaayy too big for me... We're talking about sleeves being too long for my arms for good 6 inches, and they'd be way too stretched out the roll the sleeves up. They'd fall down all the time. I mean, look at this large man!!! I'm small!!

But, I can still steal them, can't I? He just won't give them to me, right??

So I'm gonna steal them, and he arrests me for it *wink wonk*. That'd be a fun little half-roleplay, right?? 👀👀

Just imagine the whole him catching you wearing his sweater without his permission, bending you over the kitchen counter and cuffing your hands behind your back.

I'm talking full interrogation at the kitchen table, him having none of your shit, while you're flirting shamelessly.

He can't do anything... You're his wife!

And it turns into a punishment/game. Let's see how many times he can make you cum with just his mouth before you're absolutely begging him to just fuck you.

And let's see how many times you can cum on his cock before he is completely spent.

I... Need a moment.

And Walter.

Please.

I need the bear🥺

So yeah, Walter. I'm sorry Sy, but I don't like my toes sucked😬😂

Thank you babe 💖💖💖

#Ask lisa #walter marshall #Captain Syverson #Ooops smut bomb

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vaggatha · 4 years

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i spent waaayy too long on this piece which is deadass just a messy sketch

#chaggie #hazbin hotel #vaggie #charlie #if i repost this it's bc it disappeared from the tags again #anyway i hope the girls enjoyed their slipknot gig lol #my stuff

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kiwicorgii · 4 years

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posting this here too because I spent waaayy too long on this— (and also because Instagram crop ruined it) now I get war flashbacks every time I watch the mv, I’m gonna go sleep for these days straight now

just proves that you should never give up :)

#def leppard #rick savage #joe elliott #phil collen #rick allen #art #1980s #80s

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lalainajanes · 4 years

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Hey! How’s life been treating you??

Hello! I’m okay-ish, thank you for asking, kind anonymous stranger! I hope you’re doing well!

It’s taken me a looong time to adjust to working from home and my work is connected to an industry that’s been hit pretty hard by the pandemic so layoffs are happening, we’ve lost 9 people in my office over the last few weeks, including my very favourite coworker :( I still have a job but the cuts have been happening on Fridays so who knows what’ll happen tomorrow?

In the plus side, I took last weekend and vegged hard, spent waaayy too long on a mindless computer game. I did a thing that was scary but ultimately good with my attempts at original writing. And I ate a decent amount of vegetables this week, for the first time since like, March.

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gilbertgonzalezjr · 4 years

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2010 - 2020 A Recap!

A decade, in an instant, told as only I can! (WARNING: Not for the faint of heart!) My Personal Highlights from 2010 - 2020

- Quit the California School for the Deaf after 10 year - Moved to Los Angeles - Had 22 [rotating] roommates in my one bedroom apt (just in the first year) - Got an agent, a manager, auditioned and started booking work as a Hollywood actor (Even recorded an original pop song in a major studio) - Got my certification and started working full time as an ASL interpreter. - Delivered my first sermon and became a preacher - Started a non-profit ministry - Rediscovered keto (formerly my version of “atkins”) and lost 100 lbs. - Got a boyfriend (my first [long term] relationship) - Met my 20+ year #1 favorite music artist: Celine Dion - Met many celebrities and influential people that I have always respected and admired and even became close friends with a couple of them. - Launched a video production ministry and started creating documentaries, short films, music videos, and featurettes of my own. - Officiated 2 marriage ceremonies - Got over my fear of flying - Tried mangos for the first time. I like them.

Life was good at the end of 2009. I was with my friends A LOT whom were (and still are) my family. I had just taught my first year of Bible Study and I was working at a job I really enjoyed… well, somewhat.

Now, I have never talked about this publicly before, but the school for the deaf taught me a lot in the 10 years I worked there to that point. I became involved because I loved to sign so much, I was really gifted at it, and I desperately wanted to help people (interpret). I wasn’t always greeted in the community with the same level of openness unfortunately. I was surrounded by very strong personalities and I was targeted a lot by the staff that were all much older than me. I was reminded of my place constantly. Comments about my youth, my “flamboyant” personality, and my being hearing (not deaf) would constantly come up as a negative. It became a hard place to work at. After a couple years of tolerating it, it began to wear on my health and I had to go on medication for anxiety. Staff members would brag to one another about how much they could put me through hoping I would quit or break. I was imitated, mocked, and teased endlessly. I was accused of “stealing” sign language (“their” language) for profit. I was not taken seriously by some and ignored entirely by others. One time, I was even removed from a Valentine’s Day party because the teacher didn’t want me to have a good time with the other staff and students knowing I bought them all small gifts with my own money. I was escorted by the teacher of the classroom to a printing room far across the other end of campus to make unnecessary copies of random books (“busy work”). She bragged about it later to our mutual supervisor.

“You should have seen what I did to Gilbert earlier today. I got him so good! You should have seen the look on his face. Ugh! I don’t like him! He’s always so happy”.

My supervisor, whom I revered as a mentor, scolded her,

“You’re evil. What has he ever done to you?”,

to which the teacher replied,

“Nothing except that others, like you, like him. I just want to make sure he knows that I don’t like him and I don’t have to.”

It was classic bullying, by *staff*. I had come to learn that most people want what they perceive as “validation” and relevance so intensely that they are willing to take or create it however they can, especially at the expense of others… in whatever little corner of the world they are currently in. At CSDF, specifically, there was a history of culture clashing from the deaf towards the hearing so a very tangible hostility was constantly felt by hearing staff members, even if they only meant to contribute and serve the community. It was super politically charged and I didn’t have the stomach to fight it everyday just to stay kind and happy in my daily interactions with other staff. I felt like I was in a pressure cooker and there was no place to come up for air. I knew I had to leave, or else it would make me just as bitter and jaded as they all were. I didn’t know how I was going to do that, but just around the corner, was my ticket to exceedingly do so. I was about to be free.

Four years after competing in American Idol (2006), I was contacted at the beginning of 2010 by the President of Nova Talent International: Tammi Smith. She knew of my singing and wanted me to join Team USA and compete in the World Championships of Performing Arts. Several months later, I was in Hollywood, CA, amongst 50 other American performers and 52 other countries all with their own teams of talented contestants. I won 5 silver medals, made the semi-finals of the competition, and met my first talent manager and acting coach. It was then that I called my boss and gave my notice at the school. Within 3 short weeks, I was living in the city of angels, out of my car, with only my clothes, my cats, and a massive amount of faith. It was the boldest move I have ever done in my life.

It took me a month to book my first commercial and get my own apartment. I had spent much of that initial time with my good friend Kiki who took me off the Inglewood streets and let me crash on her couch while I auditioned and made my daily rounds with agents and scouts. It was hectic and her hospitality saved my life. I love you, Kiki! Thank you so much!

I fell in love with the Los Angeles Dream Center and its pastor Matthew Barnett on my very first visit. I was scared because I didn’t want to invest into a Church community if the Pastor was going to end up speaking terrible things against the LGBT community like I had previously experienced in the Bay Area. I hadn’t had a home Church like this, where I felt welcomed and celebrated and was able to serve so openly. I became great friends with Pastor Matthew and became the Church’s sign language interpreter and even starred as a lead in their Christmas play. It was all so magical. I felt special, chosen, and like I was starting to cause real growth in overly conservative circles. I started close friendships with so many of the young adults that attended there (my age group). It was like I stumbled into a dream. It wasn’t long, however, before I realized I was the butt of so many jokes behind my back with my new “Christian” friends when I wasn’t around. I wasn’t aware that I was the only openly gay attendee at the Church. The support that I received to my face was diminished by the comments made about me when I was gone. “When will Gilbert stop being so rebellious and learn that being gay is a choice, and he can simply choose out of that lifestyle?” ”Gilbert wants to start a bible study? How can we trust him? He thinks it’s okay to be gay. Yeah, I don’t trust that. I will not be attending.” “I will never attend Gilbert’s wedding if he marries a man. That’s an abomination.” I began to distance myself from the very people that I thought were my new friends.

Soon even, after that.. I stumbled upon a subculture at the Church that I had never even considered before… closeted gay Christian men! It was such a phenomenon to me, but they had their own community. I was not raised Christian so I didn’t know that in some circles, you can be as flamboyantly gay and “out” as you want as long as you don’t identify with the word “gay” or wholly accept your attraction to other men. I found myself running in circles of gay men that were just as gay as me (and in some cases WAAAYY “gayer”) but they would never talk about it. In fact, they would go immediately silent when I would discuss my desire to date Zac Effron or the guy from the Betty Crocker potato commercial. I would be confronted with “Gilbert, you have to not feed that. That’s an attack on your identity by “the enemy” (meaning the devil). “You’re not gay. You’re straight. You just have to keep speaking it over yourself until you feel its truth.”

I was so confused because I thought that being a Christian meant you had to live openly and honestly and it was *profoundly* obvious that none of us liked women. For some in the community, they would still even date girls and would go through the charade of pretending to be into them hoping that their attractions would be “corrected” and change one glorious day. It grieved me to see all these girls that thought they were dating the holiest boys around because they refused to touch them. The girlfriends did not want to accept or even see that their boyfriends were refusing to touch them only because they would rather be touching each other instead of the girls. Often they even would. I can’t tell you how many times we would be hanging out and things would become so intensely homoerotic, that it would even make me uncomfortable. That was the secret though… they could “act gay” and indulge in that behavior in private because they were able to “release” with one another without acknowledging the constant elephant in the room. It was a level of delusion that I just couldn’t get into. I separated from all individuals within that community... with the exception of one. The truth is, I had fallen deeply in love with one of them. He and I had insane chemistry... and I remained in that hopelessly romantic place with him... for 6 solid years.

For 6 years, I waited for this young man to wake up and understand it was okay to be both gay and Christian. I wanted him to be free and hoped that we could be together, officially. He never made that journey though. In fact, he confessed that was too afraid of what others thought and what his family would think and feel. His parents were famous ministers and he put his entire worth and value on his and their reputation. We had long talks about it, and hard conversations about our mutual attractions to one another. (He didn’t trust himself to sleep over at my apartment). Because I was the only one who was willing to acknowledge that I was gay, I was in an impossible situation. The desire and weight of making the first romantic move was on me, full force, but as a friend, I also wanted to respect his “attempted” orientation as a “straight” man. The situation put us both in a constant stalemate.

Like most instances of unrequited love, or being stuck in “friendsville”, I couldn’t move forward because I was blinded by what could be, right in front of me. I was also plagued with insecurities stemming from our dynamic. “Was I not good enough to come out for?” “Was I not attractive enough to push this relationship past ‘friends’ into something more?” were my constant thoughts. Most importantly, I attributed my waiting for him to God. I wanted to do this God’s way and thought that waiting was achieving that. Love is “long suffering” and “about the other person” I would tell myself, I would quote Galatians 6:9 over myself and my situation everyday hoping God would reward me and allow this guy to “get it” and go on a journey that would end with him in my arms… but it never happened. I had enough at the close of 2016 and decided to kick myself out of friendsville. After Church one day, he walked me towards my car and half way there, I stopped him. I took him to a secluded corner, looked him dead in the eye, and asked him out on our first official “date”. He smiled and looked intrigued. He told me that he would consider it. I asked him to consider it himself and to not discuss it with the “non-affirming” people in his life that believed being gay was wrong. He agreed but then broke his promise later that day when he asked three different people what they think he should do. (I wanted this to be a decision he made, alone, for the first time, for him.) He came back very angry. He said that he now saw this all as a betrayal to our 6 year friendship and I had to accept that. I was was now the bad guy. It was my worst fear, but at that time I didn’t care. It was the key to my sanity. I had to realize that he was living a life for the approval of others… not himself. A relationship wouldn’t have worked for us that way. He was mad that I wouldn’t continue the charade anymore of staying in the “undefined” place we were always in. It was the hardest I grieved and the hardest path back to healing I had ever had to take. The only other time I cried that hard and that often in the weeks that followed was when my grandmother died. A broken heart does feel like a death, because it is. The harder part was feeling like I had to forgive God for never giving me what I waited 6 years for, and yes, I felt like He was the one that asked me to wait. It was a difficult journey. I was hurt and angry with God but that had to process quickly. I was still a minister and the ministry was counting on me to walk out what I had always taught them to.

The other big journey during this decade was not just discovering the Gay Christian community, but becoming an established leader in it and starting my own ministry.

I didn’t know what I was in for. It has been the most fulfilling journey and also the most challenging. I had thought gay Christian ministry was gonna be rainbows, unicorns, pizza, and movie nights while we all discussed how great Jesus was… and boy was I wrong. No matter how much I wanted to avoid it, politics kept coming up… government and “Church” politics. It was something I still have to get used to. I also met the combative side of people that can be so vocal about what they want from me, that they are willing to act out in unbelievable and often dangerous ways to try and force me to give it to them. I wasn’t prepared for that, and I faced it often (and still do).

Also, I originally believed that it was only the non-affirming world that didn’t understand me, personally and my perspective on life and faith, but I must admit that the times I have felt the most misunderstood, isolated, and alienated in my life was by my very own gay Christian community. I still love ministry and what I do, and it is still the place that I feel I do the most good, but the journey has been far from a walk in the park.

Since 2010, I have had an unusual amount of Judases in my life. My own talent manager (and close friend) went after my former roommate (whom I had strong feelings for) and he moved him into his yacht when I was at work. I came home to an empty apartment. They thought it would be fun to call me on speaker phone and brag about their new affair. I lost a manager, and roommate and gained a broken heart all in one horrific night. My anxiety attack was so bad that night, I thought I was going to die and nearly called 911. My second talent manager was no better. He moved a younger guy in with me from the UK so that he could have “sexual access” to him whenever he wanted. At first, he told me it was because he was a fellow actor, but once he later confessed his true motive, I never let him in my house again and protected my roommate (whom had become a close friend) at all costs.

In 2014, I had a ministry partner and best friend who tried to steal the ministry from under me and was collecting people behind my back to start his own Church. He was only moderately successful, and then when his Church launched, he burned his bridge with every single person that left me for him in a matter of days. I knew God would justify me, but it still hurt. During this time, one of my absolute closest and most trusted friends started sending homemade Snapchat porn to the members of the ministry behind my back. I had just helped him patch up things with his fiance (another Phoenix member) after he was caught by multiple members having an affair. And then in 2017, one of my closest friends whom had seen all the other stuff unfold, suffered a stroke and during his healing, began to actually self destruct. He turned on me and started pursuing very young members in our ministry, confessing to them that he enjoyed that they looked underage because that’s what he was sexually attracted to. I dealt with all of this at the time of being dumped by my boyfriend who I caught texting his female ex. Later, I found out that he had lied to me about his feelings towards her and how often they were in contact and were even still seeing each other. I felt like the world was caving in on me. The members I was pouring into the most were growing increasingly more unreliable and yet more demanding of me and my time. Then, a third leader (also a close friend) informed me that he too was stepping down. I didn’t know if I had it in me to continue anymore. I nearly gave up... but I didn’t. I pushed through, and I am so glad that I did.

My 7 year journey with ministry has been some of the most exciting and fulfilling years I have ever had, but it has also caused me the most pain. I can see why some ministers leave the call and never return, remaining bitter and jaded. I don’t judge them. My heart goes out to them. We are all human and we all have our limit of what we are able to handle. I will say this though.... if you attend a Church or a Bible Study... be on time. Be reliable, and help out wherever you can. The leader needs all the help that they can get and they are doing this as a sacrifice of love, not obligation. They deserve your constant respect. I’ve learned that you can’t join a walk of life where you pour into the best of people without seeing and experiencing their worst as well, myself included. I have had to grow at an exponential rate to keep up with what I was teaching others. I believe the best teachers are the ones that lead by example and therefore I want to always deliver a great example.

Being a minister is a path not meant for all, but for those that choose it, what a painfully glorious one it is. I will have to keep you updated as this is still a path I am on, growing every day, still trying to encourage others every day. I can share now that what I have learned the most is boundaries. I have learned that “yes” and “no” wield far more power than I could have ever imagined, and going forward, I intend to wield that power more and more, and hopefully in the future… without guilt.

Meeting Celine Dion earlier this year and watching our interaction go viral on the internet was surreal. It changed me forever by showing me that anything really is possible. We have always heard it in school, but to have evidence that dreams come true can be overwhelming in the most wonderful way. The moment her and I shared is something I have only wished in my heart until that point, nearly certain it would never get to happen. Thanks to God, the joke was on me.

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Ending the year with our 6th annual Christmas video, “Extraordinary Merry Christmas” was appropriate on so many levels. The concept of the video is simple, “what makes a Christmas season ‘extraordinary’ is just the people you choose to spend it with.” I think this statement is far more true than just being limited to the holiday season. I think what makes life ‘extraordinary’ is also based off the individuals we meet and the relationships we get to cherish along the way.

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My platonic soul mate Theresa Eugenio shared this song with me by the Jonas Brothers earlier both by phone and by her 2019 post and I would like to share it with you with a dedication as well. Going into 2020, I am more guarded with my time and my peace of mind. Yes, I am more of an introvert and far less social, but when I do engage, I do so with intention. I want people to be off their phones, and unveiled with me. I also want people to feel loved and supported by me like never before because I have learned that that truly is what is most important in any interaction.

Thank you to everyone that made this decade one to remember. It is absolutely my most EPIC decade to date. Let’s see if the next 10 years can compete. (SPOILER ALERT: I have a feeling that the next 10 years will not only will be able to compete these past 10, but they will be FAARR better! The best is truly yet to come… not only for me, but for all of us!

Happy New Year! God bless!

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extreme-technicality · 5 years

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Did I ask you yet? I can't remember, so here you go. 💜 14 please.

14: Talk about a vacation.

Alrighty yalls are getting the Story of That Time Lyn Went Camping With Their Discord Spouses, this is gonna be so long and I’m not sorry :D

So this story starts aaaalllll the waaayy back at the end of March. One of my favorite fic authors had just finished up a very sweet shinkami fic and in the notes of the final chapter, added a link to a brand new Discord server specifically for shinkami shippers. Naturally, I joined, since I felt this author and I had grown to be very close through the two multichap fics I left comments on. (I didn’t expect to stay long.)

THEY RECOGNIZED ME. Not very surprising, since my Ao3 and Discord screennames are the same, but I was still shocked. I was even more shocked when they made me an admin (which was honestly one of the most questionable decisions ever, like ily but I should not be given any modicum of power because monkey brain WILL activate and cause chaos). Within three days of the server being active I had, in no particular order, become Official Teacher, adopted everyone, and got Discord married to the creator of the server (and the author of the og fics, which,,,I’m still reeling over that tbqfh, thankfully they don’t have tumblr so they won’t see me gushing lmao) as well as to another admin. Within about a week of that happening, we had created a group chat on Discord, exchanged phone numbers and created another group chat, found out we all liked camping and lived within reasonable distance of each other, and decided to plan a camping trip for two months out.

We had barely known each other for two weeks and we were all saying “yeah, I’d be down to spend a weekend with you two cuddled up in a tent together on a platonic camping trip”. But we had to wait cuz it was early April and we weren’t set to go until the end of June.

Fast forward to like, mid-June? My spouses are freaking out because the Anxieties are hitting. Meanwhile I’m so chill, like “yeah I’m about to meet internet friends who are both at least 5 years older than me and spend a whole ass weekend with them, this is fine”. My anxieties didn’t start hitting until about a day or so before the trip itself, when I started thinking “omg what if I miss one(1) single train and that makes me miss the bus and I can’t make it up there omg what if the train that the internet is telling me to take actually gets me somewhere completely different omg what if I get there and they completely fucking hate me and think I’m too childish omg omg omg”

I’m happy to say every single one of these fears was completely unfounded. Funny how anxiety works :)

Me and Spouse 1 (the one who instigated this whole thing, Author-kun) were taking buses, while Spouse 2 was driving with most of the supplies. The entire bus ride we’re texting each other privately, as well as keeping the server updated (cuz they were all very invested in how their parents would get along in person lmao).

Spouse 2 got to the bus station first and was waiting for me to get there next. I step off and I’m looking around, looking around, and THERE!! A squishy GREMLIN!!! MY SQUISHY GREMLIN!!! And in true gremlin form, we saw each other and immediately squared up to fight (we didn’t actually fight tho). And we hugged, and I shoved my bag in their car. We hopped on Discord vc and were screaming with each other and one or two other server members, and we chilled for about an hour until Spouse 1’s bus got there.

Spouse 1 had arrived, we spent at least five minutes hugging each other in the middle of the terminal and probably drawing more than a few looks, and then it was off to the campsite– well, ish. It wasn’t check-in time yet, so we took the opportunity to get lunch at this little diner and also buy food for the weekend.

Hehehe, Walmart was so much fucking fun.

While we were driving, we put on the Official Team Parents Camping Trip Playlist, dubbed PlatonicScience™️, with such clearly platonic favorites as certain songs from Six (the musical about Henry VIII’s six wives) and kingdom hearts music. (Spouse 2 made the playlist, I love them for it, and it remains my favorite playlist 2.5 months later.)

We then went to check in and get firewood, ice, and try and find our campsite. Funny story, the first place we pitched our tent was not, in fact, our assigned site :))) luckily it was literally like a slot or two down so we just picked up the tent and walked it down the way lmaoooo.

The rest of the weekend was honestly amazing. We went swimming, like, daily, I lost my sunglasses in the lake, we watched Brokeback Mountain and Inuyasha when it rained, I made us crepes for breakfast both mornings we were there, my spouses built the campfires every night (because they apparently didn’t trust me with fire, for some odd reason), I won Spouse 1 a stuffed frog from a claw machine for their birthday, they were apparently offered a slimy green gummy bear by a random kid, and I found the sunglasses I thought were lost to the depths of the water. Oh, and we all agreed to get matching tattoos in the same place. We would’ve done it before we left, but none of the 3 parlors were open to walk ins on sundays :(

The final day, we had a few hours to kill before my bus and Spouse 1’s bus would come, so we packed up Spouse 2’s car and went back to the nearby town to dick around for a few hours. We poked our heads into a few stores, I almost got like five pocketknives at a flea market, we almost got lost, and we ended the day with ice cream and lunch at the same diner.

Then it was back to the bus terminal so Spouse 1 could get their bus home, and fam when I tell you it immediately felt colder without them. Spouse 2 and I were absolutely despondent in their car. Yeah, we had each other, but we were missing Spouse 1 T_T

Finally MY bus got there, and it was even worse cuz I didn’t even have anyone to cuddle the sadness away with TnT Spouse 1 had written me and Spouse 2 letters, and included gifts of a minute hand on a chain for both of us in there. So I opened my letter on the bus, got emotional, put the necklace on, and then I looped Sad Boi Music™️ until I got back to my stop. Then it was, like, two or three trains plus a lot of walking before I got back home late that night.

#kingdomheartstrashmouth #ask dadzawa #mermaidlorelei #its 2:30am and a bitch might just have to go loop sad boi music™️ cuz theyre missing their spouses #also i know i mentioned it like once in the actual post but yeah the whole discord married thing is entirely platonic #spouse 1 is almost seven and a half years older than me and spouse 2 is roughly five years older than me #the Team Parents Camping Trip is also planned to be an annual thing too #oh right i also got a bigfoot walking stick from the campsite!! it was $7 #and thats $7 i dont regret spending in the slightest

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vaalkyrja-blog · 7 years

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// Meta-a-day: tell me about how Zofian nobles show off their wealth, and aside from lineage, what other factors separate the nobles from the commoners?

ooc.

zofian displays of wealth

as much as the game tells us that zofia is across the board known for its leisure and plenty, and never having to work hard for anything, i think that this image actually is only perpetuated by the nobility. it’s clear in-game that the peasantry still works hard; alm talks about being handy with a plow, and those sheep in ram village aren’t going to milk themselves. even if mila provides a lot of bounty, it still takes human effort to actually obtain it by sowing crops, reaping harvest, etc. i don’t think that the hard-working villagers are only a product of the famine that’s been going on for two years by SoV — someone still has to farm, even in golden era times.

as a result, though, i think that zofian wealth display goes hand in hand with the idea of not working, because this helps to uphold the traditionally ‘zofian’ image of mila’s bounty. among the nobility, leisure pastimes are huge, and as much a presentation as they are an actual pastime.

hunting for sport. zofian nobility often own vast amounts of privatized land ( clive and his four villas lmao ) and with that comes a lot of private hunting grounds that people do get jailed and fined for trespassing on, or hunting within. the game there is supposed to be solely for said nobleman’s use. though different nobles enjoying sport hunting to varying degrees, you’d be hard-pressed to find nobility that doesn’t own hunting dogs. breed and pedigree matter a lot here, and the dogs themselves are a symbol of wealth. more on that later.

sports such as dressage, pedigree showings, and horse races are also common in zofia among the upper class. in fact, i vaguely headcanon that dressage is one of the only ways that noblewomen are permitted to engage with horses beyond a purely aesthetic level, though it’s still considered a little strange. dog and cat shows are also common, and nobility who participate in these sports go a long way to not only make sure that the animal performs well, but also looks good; fortunes are spent on trappings and outfittings, and all sorts of fancy tools. there are books upon books on the subject. a lot of wealth display in zofia is centered around the idea of ‘how much money can i spend on stuff that isn’t necessary to show that i don’t care about spending’.

on that note, certain animals are only owned by nobility — purebred dogs, for example, and horses. though horses certainly exist in villages and among commoners, they’re often very noticeably workhorses, and especially in villages, they don’t tend to belong to one specific person, since the upkeep for even one horse is very costly. nobility is often recognizable for owning fine horses of good lineage, and owning a lot of them, hence fernand: “i mounted my finest destrier and sped here as quickly as i could.”

very importantly, only nobility are permitted to own warhorses of any kind; trainers are not permitted to sell horses bred and trained for anything related to battle to someone without the proper papers. this is to make sure that only nobility are able to become knights, which is something the game mentions. as a result, nobility are often depicted in portraits alongside a favored animal — often their finest hunting dog. the animal itself is an indicator of wealth and class.

i also have been thinking about how prior to the war, there was likely a holiday that the zofian nobility ( and to an extent, the middle-upper class ) celebrate which involves deliberate wastefulness. they’d gather together a bunch of stuff, the better quality the better, and burn it — clothing, food, silverware, etc. the point of it is to show that you’re so wealthy that you don’t even consider losing these things to be anything worth caring about. people noticed whichever house amassed the most things. it’s obvious why this was only done amidst the upper echelon, but the practice dwindled when mila left and the famine hit, and has probably since been dropped completely after the war as the nobility began to understand what it is to want for something.

wealth, of course, among the nobility, also manifests not only financially, but also as political power. the two are often directly correlated, but not always, and depends a lot more on influence and connections, as well as other forms of socio-economic monopoly. you can have a family that’s very wealthy financially, but if they don’t have assets or investments in the right places, they might not have a lot of political clout or leverage with which to sway the king. in some ways, political wealth matters more than financial wealth, and of course this is where the court games come into play.

difference between nobility vs. commoners

aside from the obvious blood lineage, there’s a whole lot that separates zofian nobility from commoners; in fact, they pretty much run in two entirely different spheres, and culturally they can even be vastly different. python points towards this incredibly wide gap when he says to clive that people born and raised in nobility just can’t ever hope to understand commoners, and vice versa, no matter how open-minded and egalitarian they might be. the lifestyles are just so vastly different.

one of the biggest cultural differences i think comes in the form of speech. it’s easy to see in the game, even, where that comes in — clair’s way of talking is an exaggerated form of noble rhetoric, but i think it’s actually what’s common in the circles she runs in. we should keep in mind that clive, mathilda, and fernand are nobles too, but in many ways they’re quite different from regular nobility. at the very least, they’ve been in the deliverance for this long, and have adapted their mannerisms to appeal to a wider audience. speech in the higher circles isn’t so much about what you’re saying as it is about how you’re saying it, and clair’s ‘fancy’ words and habit of speaking in third person and addressing others by epithets are likely a lot more emblematic of how the average zofian noble talks in court and at other social engagements.

class lines in zofia are also heavily drawn on the urban vs. rural line, as well; though nobles are decentralized around parts of zofia, urban areas tend to build up around noble places of residence — because of the heavy need for manpower within each house ( servants, etc. ), it’s natural that communities tend to form around the seat of nobility in each region. additionally, all high nobility have residences in the castle city around zofia castle ( which……is unnamed bc intsys likes to make my life hard idk, but is presumably the capital ) in order to attend court when it’s in session and also to just stay in the know.

because of these aspects, nobility tends to be associated with urban lifestyles and culture, while commoners are associated with rural life. dialects are probably different as a result; nobility probably all speak relatively similarly, probably an ‘urban dialect’ with minor variations, while rural dialects can vary drastically, and what’s spoken near the mountain ranges probably sounds very different from what’s spoken elsewhere, etc. this is also why i think lukas gets so much flack for being “backwater nobility” — removed from metropolitan life and therefore uncultured, very literally situated amongst the commoners because of real, geographic location.

i also think that nobility and commoners probably view the mila faith differently and worship the zofian religion in different ways, actually. again, the game depicts zofians are being decadent and depraved, but realistically this probably only applies to nobility, or people who can afford to be decadent and wasteful. the mila faith among the upper classes tends to be about celebrating mila’s blessings with pleasure and leisure, because this is historically what mila wanted them to have — to lead lives of comfort and happiness. in this way, their worship verges more on what we see in SoV’s opening sequence, with wine and dancing and excessive food and riches. it’s all about just basking in decadence because you can, because this is what mila wanted for us. in this way, their faith much resembles dionysian worship practices.

in contrast, i think among the commoners, the focus is a lot more on being grateful for mila’s bounty and plenty, particularly focused around the harvest. there’s still a lot of food and drink and celebration, but it’s less about overindulgence and leisure and more about being grateful for what you have, sort of like the idea around thanksgiving.

as mentioned before as well, only nobility are permitted to enter the knighthood, and i think traditionally, nobility are also the only ones allowed to assume high-ranking leadership positions in the military. there’s probably been more wiggle room for this over time, though, and there have definitely been cases where commoners have risen to become celebrated military leaders ( i’ll talk later about how i headcanon how mathilda’s house was one of these waaayy back in the day ), but this is still a rare occurrence, and the knighthood is still restricted to those ( men, usually ) of noble birth. this is why mycen had to be formally made a count by the king himself in order to be granted knighthood, though i think such an occurrence is very rare and — as fernand shows us — definitely looked down upon for not being traditional nobility by lineage.

#( this goes under a read more #cause it ended up being 1600 words #i am so sorry #as always other zofians can feel free to chime in )#rigelsprince #( ✉ )#⊰ ᴏᴛʜᴇʀ ⊱ | shieldmaiden .

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