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#I am pretty out there rn - I have been up for like almost 21 hours :'D
mitamicah · 4 months
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Happy bithday to this chill cat :3
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sergeifyodorov · 10 months
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willy mitch and auston for the character ask thing? <3
FIRST IMPRESSION
now bcause of Leafs Cultural Osmosis i had heard of them for a long time before i starting becoming a real leafsguy. Uhh generally i heard the most about auston matthews because he’s big and cool and sexy and hit em with the 4 and all of that. I think my most definitive pre-leafsfan leafs memory of them (him in particular) was once newsscrolling in like the early 21-22 season when he came back, struggled a bit, and then shaved his mustache for movember and started immediately scoring a g/pg
IMPRESSION NOW
Willy: a beautiful blonde Barbie doll of a man. going to gloss over how sexy i find him because it is, genuinely, embarrassing, and instead talk about the fact that he’s a) kind of stupid, but in an exceedingly charming way, b) has named his dogs after famous artists (pablo and banksy are their names), c) is one of the de facto leaders of the nhl’s swedish contingent. he also has this amazing power where he’s like… vibe immune. Like in one of Those Leafs Moments where all hope is lost and you know it is not going to end well, he’s going to score. Or, conversely, when the Leafs have cut the other team open and they’re bleeding all over the place, Willy isn’t going to do much. this means he is both “the only one who scores in the playoffs” and also “never there when they’re winning” which means ppl suspect he’s being carried or something. he’s not. also i suspect he might be a little bit gay but that’s not really my business
Mitch: babygirl of the year 8 years running. I am one of thee premier marner defenders like people hate him for NO REASON. only time ive been mad at my father in the past several years is the other day when i yelled at him for being Wrong About Mitchell but let’s not get into mitchydaddyissues because we can be here for hours about that. he is a creature of light he is Kind On Purpose but also he’s definitely got so much to work through in therapy it’s hard to define. also kind of dumb irl, but hockeywise just absolutely gobsmackingly intelligent. Has the ability to create chances out of nothing i am thinking of so many moments rn but most specifically the oilers game this year where they were down 3-1 and then he just stole it and MAGICKED the leafs into like. 3 goals in 5 minutes and they ended up running away with it. gorgeous. also he is one of the most decorated Winners in ohl history his conn smythe era is almost upon us and i believe this thoroughly
Auston: ALSO SEXY and im NOT embarrassed abt it. Gonna be real theres so many marner scholars out there and i consider myself a trendbreaker. Im a matthews scholar. He’s a virgo you don’t understand him like i (also a virgo) do; he’s meticulous and nerdy and completely blank in his understanding of things he does not care about; he’s whiny and petulant and completely ruthless -- to him there is only the place now, and the goal, and the clear line he needs to draw between point a and point b. he likes things to be Pretty he is fastidious and in that gray area between genre aware and completely oblivious; maybe he is choosing not to take notice of it. he also looks really gay. like are u flagging on purpose mr mustache and earrings
FAVOURITE MOMENT
Willy: overtime winner willy… he is unlike the other leafs stylistically in that he is absolutely fantastic at controlled zone entries AND he has straight-line speed that they. don’t. so this makes him naturally very talented at finding that open space you often get in 3v3 ot and sniping it on the breakaway. i think my fav in this recent years was the one against the blues… he just BURNS tarasenko and forehand-backhands binnington completely effortlessly so sexily. Also him straight up telling steve dangle he couldn’t read
Mitch: POINT STREAK NIGHT. Technically he set the record against tampa in tampa but he TIED the record in toronto against the sharks… it was 2-1 leafs and the sharks had the net empty and mitch was out there and he PASSED on the empty net and we were all like MITCH WHY TAKE THIS FOR URSELF and then the guy he passed to missed. And then he got it back and took the empty net himself and the cheering was so loud and long they had 2 pause the game a lil bit… this was in the recent aftermath of borje salming’s passing and they had the patch on their shoulders, and they were in the actually nice RRs, and mitch was CRYING and i was CRYING and i am STILL CRYING… he means so much to the leafs he WILL be one of the Great Leafs by the time his career is over no leaf will ever wear 16 again after him i love him so much!!! Thats a formative hockey memory
Auston: that time he ate the post and got really really bitchy about it to the press w his swollen lip
IDEA FOR STORY
Willy: now willy is just so cheerily and sexily oblivious it’s honestly kind of hard to maincharacter-ize him. Like he’s just kind of :) chilling. i WOULD like to see a meaningless sitcom episode type beat of him trying to wrangle all of the Swedes to some sort of dinner or something, and shenanigans ensue.
Mitch: the urge to tragic-protagonistize him versus him just being a cheery little motor who’s doing his BEST. i dont know what my mitch niche is he’s really just the emotional heart of it all and im not a very emotional person it is hard 4 me. he’s our main sadman’s bestie <3
Auston: now AUSTON i can write about forever. go read scheherazade etc but in the meantime i think he deserves some begrudging romance. he doesn’t WANT to fall in sappy gay love he’s not sappy he’s not gay and he’s not lovey he wants to WIN CUP but sometimes… WIN CUP comes with bonus SAPPY GAY BOYFRIEND. Also he deserves some erotic tension to knock him off that high horse he’s got a bit. get a leetle bit humiliated. Etc
UNPOPULAR OPINION
Willy: this is really only unpopular among leafs uncles on twitter etc but he is not lazy or emotionally uninvolved at all? He’s literally just coolheaded. U value perseverance and grit but when u get that from a blonde guy who doesn’t hit u don’t value it. that’s genuine xenophobia methinks
Mitch: i don’t get gay vibes from him he’s just real friendly and sweet and pretty. like yeah he definitely messed around w his teammates in juniors but it’s giving more like. experimentation and the results of the experiment were heterosexuality. Bi girl’s straight boyfriend vibes
Auston: coming from my place of Auston Scholarship again i disagree with a lot of the way he’s portrayed in fic… not all of it obvi but i think there’s a certain amount of Big Sexy Latino Guy must therefore be dom top/all this like. anger and feistiness and aggression and stuff when he pretty clearly is not any of that. like he’s never started a fight and tries to stay away from that… in fact his 1 nhl fight (matthews v stamkos, this playoffs) was him clearing up sticks from an earlier shoving match and then stammer going for him to try and draw mutual fighting majors. it’s kinda skeevy and just makes me like. Roll my eyes and leave when he starts getting possessive because he’s. Not really that possessive he likes to share he likes 2 have his guys and likes for all of his guys to like each other… he is having threesomes with bunts and freddie come next season i prommy, not pitting them against each other
FAV RELATIONSHIP
Willy: i think his half-mentorship half-romance with rasmus sandin is really inchresting… also just his general social standing among The Swedes as both one of the country’s best active players AND as a legacy boy
Mitch: 1634 :]
Auston: now im going 2 contradict myself… 1634 are of course platonic/hockey soulmates but i do love his dynamic with Others. The 1634 + machuk dramatic love triangle is v compelling… he did have this fun little Mutual Bastardy relationship with bunts… 9734 is very. Something. and i think the mattdrai girlies who love some regional rivalry high draftee mutual loathing would really enjoy some good good auston/ras dahlin now that machuk is too busy being happily married to sasha barkov
FAV HEADCANON
Willy: he is the oldest boy of six children so he has DEFINITELY done some child wrangling in the past… some oldest brother shenanigans… i think he’s probably great with kids and just with calming down and bossing around those that are younger/obviously less experienced and worldly than him
Mitch: thought the percy jackson books were dense academic texts but obviously really likes greek mythology. so . lied about having read percy jackson (he has not but he says he has)
Auston: paints his toenails
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lilypixels · 3 years
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Izzy’s Dag-Dag The Artist… Tag
By @morgynemberisagenderfluiddaddy
~ Rules ~
Show us a rendition of yourself in your own art! Can be anything! Sims render? Random stick figure? Picrew? Go nuts! (Just be sure to tag the artist if you use someone else’s picrew!!!!) Tag the blogs you want to know, and don’t be a dick that’s it! Also, feel free to answer as vague or in-depth as you want. And if you don’t want to answer a question for any reason just don’t vibe with it! Skip it if you wanna! Also make sure you tag me and use #dagdagtheartisttag so I can see it!!!!!!!!
This is a bit long so i’m just gonna...
~Questions~
1.) Do you prefer to be referred to by your name or blog name? Both are fine! I don’t care much about what people refer to me as in general and have had someone on here call me lily once
2.) Where are you from? I won’t say exact, but I live in the middle of USA (I can’t wait to move-)
3.) Do you have pets? 👀 Yes! 3 dogs and 2 cats, tho only one cat is truly “mine”
4.) Tell us about your “dream”. uhh like where I want to be in life? what I want to do? um I’m still working on the exact job title, but I wish to do research at a natural history/science museum (sorta like archives or collections manager, but neither of those are quite right i think). Otherwise, I just hope to adopt and even foster kids cause my life would not be complete without little ones :3 (spouse/partner optional lol) 
5.) Aside from art, what are your hobbies? Randomly researching things that grasp my attention, games...lots of games, reading, watching tv, coloring (wait does that count as art-), uhhh spacing out
6. )Does anyone irl know about your blog? yeah, but mostly just know about, not like see my posts i guess
7.)Do you know anyone from your blog irl? not outside of just chatting on discord
8.) What are some fun facts about you? I’ve had some poems published before (it was with entering a poetry contest), I have surprisingly good balance, my brain is not properly awake/functioning until 10am which has led to me almost using soap as toothpaste a few times too many, I have a birthmark on my finger (bonus: it sorta changes color/how noticeable it is depending on how hot or cold I am lol, i call it a mini thermometer cause of this), apparently Lion King was my Disney movie obsession as a kid...oh and I have a certificate in cryptozoology lolz
9.) What’s your day job? i work as a private nanny/glorified babysitter (i don’t live with them or drive but work regular hours through week and as needed; even join the occasional vacation with them)
10.) Do you have a celebrity look alike? i don’t think so; a girl in high school once said I look like Cameron Diaz tho-
11.) What’s your aesthetic? for my blog I think it’s becoming like dark academia meets cottage core?? idk for myself...who knows
12.) What kind of artist are you? the tired kind lol
13.) How did you get into your form of art? if we’re looking at sims, uhhh well I just happened to learn about cc one day, then happened upon simblr, saw edits, and thought I’d give a try cause I can’t draw but I need a creative outlet so this worked for me
14.) What do you watch/listen/read/anything else while you create? if I do anything, its listen to music; music is generally random based on what I feel like but more recently its been 2d anime groups (idolish7, hypnosis mic, etc)
15.) What is your favorite of your own creations so far?  lets see...this, this, and this edit wise I think
16.) How would you describe your art style? idk chaos
17.) What is more satisfying to you coloring or outlining? coloring, I like coloring 
18.) What meme would you use to describe yourself?
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19.) What character from any media form do you most identify with? oh gosh uhhhh there’s a few but I’ll say Iori and Sogo from Idolish7 since they come to mind first lol. Iori is a fellow aquarius who hides his interests and agonizes over past slipups even a year later, others have legit moved on but he’s still stuck on it (that was true moment I was like “omg you are aquarius” lol cause yeah meee). Sogo i heavily relate to as well cause he’s,,,very nice and hides his own feelings, putting others before himself (but when right buttons get pushed, he can be scary lol) so yeah, those two
20.) If you were on the run, what would you change your name to? I’ve never thought of this...no clue
21.) Have you ever or do you want to change blog names? I have changed names, yes; I used to be silverine-sims but after a time i didn’t ~vibe~ with it
22.) God forbid Tumblr decides to pull a MySpace and lets us have page songs, what song would you choose?  page songs like adding playlist to blog? i mean its possible already with bit of coding and I used to have one set up but uh one song huh? gosh um I guess Twisted Hearts by tasuku hatanaka; it was op for Moriarty the Patriot s2 and I’m pretty obsessed with it rn 
23.) Oh yeah, I’m still on the MySpace train and I’m starting discourse! Who’s your top 8? my brain refuses to think and rank; i have trouble with choices and that extends to favorites,,
24.) Did you understand those references or did you have to look them up? (I’m fully aware I’m ancient, but are you?) i know of myspace but otherwise i have no clue what all it entailed
25.) One last question; why are you like that? I grew up watching Secret Saturdays, He-Man, Teen Titans, Danny Phantom, and Spongebob idk what to tell ya ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Dag dag?
Now tag tag!!!
I know not all of you will do this or was tagged by izzy already but I’m tagging everyone I can think of anyway-
@cyansimblr @neriney @lunchsims @waysims @klayde @sinfulwunders @void-imp @ladykendalsims @lazysunjade @almost-spring @smolteabirb @lunaziie @clumsyghostie​ and uh uh anyone else cause its too early and my brain just quit
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btssavedmylifeblr · 3 years
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I forgot to send on my voting story. Ok so my brother and I both got mail in ballots, and let me tell you how we both forgot to mail it in so we just thought to bring them to our voting location. The lady there kinda yelled at us? She was confused and didn't know how to go about it. And honestly I just took it because we were the idiots who didn't mail in our ballots. We had to rip them up and they just us new ones to fill out in person and submit. Not exciting, but a story for void snippet. 👀
Anonymous said: Hi!! I'm so excited for void! I voted today around 30 minutes before the polls closed in my neighborhood because I had to wait for my dad and brother to get home from work since they wanted to go all together hehe. It was a pretty fast process! We just pressed buttons on screens (compared to last election where we had to bubble in everything by hand) plus, I got to keep the stylus that they gave us and it works on phones too! 🥰🥰 Thank you! I love your writing so much 💜💜💜
Anonymous said: I did mine through mail me and my husband did and we went to the post office a little while back and then he took us on a nice little date afterward and we got ice cream! Also I love void💖 keep up the good work
Anonymous said: VOTES FOR VOID??? I love democracy and I love VOID! So since May I've (temporarily) moved back home from New York to Indiana RE: covid; I've voted absentee for the both the primaries and presidential election (I'm still in IN rn...blah). I voted early and mailed in my ballot for the presidential election (about 3 weeks ago). Made sure my family was voting (brother mailed it in, mom dropped off a ballot, and dad did early voting) and encourage them to put up a Biden sign in our yard <3
Anonymous said: HI BEE! I ALSO VOTED TODAY! IM 21 SO THIS IS MY FIRST TIME VOTING FOR THE PRESIDENTIAL ELECTION (my 18th bday didnt make the cutoff since im a december bday) im so happy to have done my part! I made sure to study up on the judges and policies and everything! Luckily the polling place didn't have a line so i was able to get in, get my ballot, and fill it in right away! I even dragged my mom and cousin to come with me. I made a joke on snapchat to encourage my friends to vote too. It was a pic of my "i voted" sticker with a caption saying "omg youre so sexy when you vote aHaha" -🦙
Anonymous said: this is my first time doing this so, so i hope i’m sending this correctly! i voted early in late september by mail! i live in a swing state, so it’s really important for me to vote and not waste time!! bc of my age, this is my first time voting so i’m really nervous 😅
Anonymous said: I voted by email! I'm overseas so I wasn't sure if my ballot would actually make it through in time, so I decided to go electronically. Had to sign a waiver saying I understand that my vote won't be anonymous but I haven't been given a reason to suspect voter suppression/fraud in my state, so I'm happy I think...!
Anonymous said: hi, i voted early on oct 24th. my absentee ballot didn't come in, so i had to travel back home to vote (~3 hour drive). when we got there, there was a ton of people outside the polling place, but no lines, so i was in and out pretty quick. it was my first time voting, so i had all the candidates i was voting for written down on a tiny receipt so i wouldn't forget 😅. my mom was with me, so she voted too. took a pic with my sticker (mask on for extra covid-ness) and went home. drove back the next afternoon!
whippedforkook said: Hi Bee. 💕 I voted in early October - nearly a month ago! 😱 It’s been really weird with all the lead up to the election because it felt like it should have been done once I cast my ballot! A lot of my friends have volunteered to get out the vote: writing postcards to voters, texting, phone banking, working the polls, curing ballots. I didn’t volunteer at all this year, but I hope that all of my friends’ hard work and everyone else’s is enough. I’m also hoping and praying that I will be in a better place mentally for 2022 so that I too can volunteer. Our work starts with 2020 not ends. 💕 Wishing you well. 💕
begineuphoria said: I went and voted last Friday as it was our last early voting day. No way was I going to wait until today with the crowds of people in my area that still act as if masks are somehow infringing on their rights. 🙄 It was a rather normal experience for the most part. Other than having to use a coffee stir stick to press the buttons on the machine to vote. In and out within five minutes.
Anonymous said: I voted down the street at this pretty park this morning. I got up at 5:30 and it was freezing. Luckily I wore like 30 layers and stood outside for 2 hours. Some nasty orange man supporters were rude but everyone else was pretty nice. A really cute older couple was playing soccer with pine cones and kicked it towards me to play too. Not the worst time tbh.
Anonymous said: Did mail-in voting in California! Extremely exhausting and took forever to research all the propositions - they are notoriously tricky in hiding their flaws and one side tends to outrageously outspend the other. But in the end I felt really good about my research and decisions! No need for you to post a snippet for this story - would like to save that to read sometime in the future ;) Thank you so much for doing this!
joonsgotthejuice said: Votes for void??? I am here! I went last Thursday and it was chaotic bc I kept going past the poll place but the line was soooo long so my mom called me and woke me up like "its pouring rain and the line is super short get up I'm gonna pick you up" so thats the story of how I got dressed in 5 minutes and dragged my ass to vote in the rain <3
Anonymous said: i voted early on thursday it was cold and rainy but i went in the late afternoon and thankfully the only waiting i did was a few minutes for an elevator i got very lucky and while waiting for the results is awful the relief that came from voting in general was just great
Anonymous said: Wheeew the polls just closed and I finally got to cast my ballot yayyy ( I was the one working the polls from earlier) it’s been a really really long day and we actually had surprisingly good turnout. I saw a woman try to vote for someone else who claimed to be “helping” and I saw a woman who I’m pretty sure was on some typa something 👀 Overall though I really I’m really thankful for people like you who encouraged people to get out and vote. I hope the odds are in our favor❤️🤞🏼
chelsea-chee said: Hello Bee! Today surprisingly my elderly father wanted to vote so I brought him out with me. He only cared about voting for Biden, which meant I got to help decide who he should vote for with the rest of the candidates and amendments! Say hello to baby bee for me as well! 💖
Anonymous said: Okay I gonna got a chance to vote today and the process wasn’t that bad actually. I went in just now and it wasn’t that busy( thankfully) so no lines. I’m from Texas and it’s gonna be almost impossible to turn this state blue, but every vote counts! I love that you are getting people to vote and also sharing your experiences as well!
owl-orgy said: Dropped off my mail in ballot at a polling location! I originally wanted to vote early in person because I was worried my signature wouldn’t match closely enough but ended up just turning it in and double checked today to make it said “ballot accepted and counted”!
Anonymous said: I voted in person this afternoon, better late than never I guess. I was gonna go last week but then I got cramps from hell. There was no one in line in front of me, I think my county early voted because it was packed everyday the last few weeks
Anonymous said: I voted early a couple weeks ago. Exciting thing though that did happen was I got both my parents to vote for their first time ever.
Anonymous said: I had a mail in vote. So, I filled it out and dropped it in at the ballot box at my library. (I also checked out books for the first time in years, so I had fun!)
bubblyjiminnie said: I literally just finished voting. Lucky for me, the line and wait wasn’t very long, and it was a nice enough day that the short amount of time I had to spend in line outside of the building wasn’t too bad. My social anxiety when it comes to stuff like this tends to be high but that’s what I get for waiting until Election Day instead of going the mail in route. This was only my second time voting, but I’m glad that I did 😊
Anonymous said: I turned my ballot in last week :) I’m not a big fan of crowds and I hate make spur of the moment choices but despite that the first time I was able to vote back in 08 my Mom pressured me into voting in person because “you’d have to experience it at least once in our life”. And ever since then I comfortably vote by mail. I take my time, do all of my research, listen to music, and best of all don’t have to deal with people.
Anonymous said: here in Washington state it’s super easy to vote. I dropped my ballot off in mid-October and it’s already been accounted for! Mail in voting and drop box voting is fantastic and provides equal opportunity and access. Sad to see some people in red states misinforming Americans about it! We also have a referendum for implementing mandatory sex ed, including teaching respect, empathy and consent as part of the curriculum so I was happy to vote yes on that too!
unionrox006 said: I voted about 2 weeks ago by doing a mail in ballot. The other eligible to vote members of my household did the same. We chose to vote by absentee ballot because both my mom and I have an autoimmune disorder, so we have to be careful going out in the pandemic. Tbh, the ballot layout was a bit confusing at first as was all the paperwork and required IDs and documents. But my dad explained it to me and we got them filled out and mailed off. Kinda mad I didn't get a sticker for it though
bluetostone said: Love this and so excited for the next chp of void! I early voted a few weeks ago and because I live in a pretty rural county I was in and out of my polling place in a few minutes. No sticker though 😢. I live in a swing state so it could go either way in terms of delegates. Just praying everyone is safe tonight as the results roll in...though, won't we not know for sure for a couple of days or weeks?
Anonymous said: My mom, sister, and I received our early voting ballots a while ago and I took the longest to fill mine out because it was making me anxious :,( but I did return it before it was due. I checked our ballot statuses and mine and my moms were accepted but my sister’s said they hadn’t received hers back. Then she got another ballot so she filled that one out too and I took it yesterday 👍👍 I think she got two because she changed her address late so they sent two?
vixsynsblog said: Non-interesting voter story: I'm paranoid and live in a highly divided area, so I filed mail-in ASAP, mailed it a few days after cause neighbors are nosy and don't understand boundaries. Was able to track my ballot through my credit company, which was nice. Only thing I was missing was my sticker. Never got one✊😔. So I had to improvise and write it in pen on my disposable mask. I'm working all this week so if riots break out from either side, I'll be at work. Prayers for the safety of others🙏
______
Waaah!!! Thank you all for voting!! You are all my heroes. I am so grateful and proud of you. I’m sorry I ran out of time to respond to you individually. I’m going to drop two big scenes from Chapter 7 in gratitude (one of which will be familiar to my patrons and one won’t). I’m hopeful I will have the whole next chapter out very soon. Love you all!
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Void spoilers below the cut.
When you wake up in the morning, there are still no signed HR forms in your messages. Had you been a fool to think they were interested? How much time does it take to decide such a thing? Perhaps just by putting the idea out there explicitly, it had lost all of its taboo appeal. 
There is a calendar reminder waiting for you: Today is chili pepper pollinating day. At least this gives you an excuse to talk to Hoseok. 
You find the science officer in the lab as always, sitting with his knee up against his chest. Hoseok doesn’t look well. He’s got dark circles under his eyes.
“Hey, um…” You shuffle your feet. Want to fuck me? No wait…“You don’t look good. Were you here all night?” you ask.
He blinks at you, bleary-eyed. “Um, was I? Yeah.. I suppose. Lost track of time.” He rubs his eyes, before looking you up and down, then casting his gaze back to the floor. 
All you want to do is ask about the forms. Or the meeting. Or what he thinks of you now. But you don’t. “I need to pollinate the chili peppers today.” Usually Hoseok is the person who assists with that. “But I can get one of the other guys to do it if you need the sleep.”
“No!” Hoseok lurches forward, standing up a bit to rapidly and needing to put his hand back on the bench to steady himself. “I mean, I’m fine.” 
You should disgaree with him. He is exhausted. But you’d like more time to talk to him. 
Pollinating the chili peppers is both time-sensitive and time-consuming, hence why it took two of you to get the job done. There were no insects on your ship to do the job for you and if they didn’t get pollinated, they wouldn’t bear any fruit. Your chili peppers were your favorite crop. Not only a vital source of Vitamin C, but all your food benefitted from having a bit of spice added to it. 
You and Hoseok head for the greenhouse together. The intital set-up gives you something to talk about in the beginning. Hoseok gathers the pollen from one flower onto a paintbrush, then hands it over to you to paint onto the stigmas of each little flower on the next plant in the line.
Slowly the conversation dries up as you fall into a silent rhythm. Other than just enjoying the chili peppers, you must admit that this was one of your favorite tasks on the ship because of the high likelihood that the two of you would brush hands peridically. Always gave you butterflies. But today he seems extra intent on keeping his distance from you. Was he disgusted by you now? His hands are trembling.
“Are you sure you’re okay?” 
His hand twitches so hard that a little rain of yellow pollen cascades onto the floor. He curses in frustration before turning to face you. “Are you sure you’re okay?” 
“Um, yes, I’m fine. Why wouldn’t I be?”
“This, um, plan of yours…” he gestures to the vague tension in the air. “It doesn’t feel like you.”
“I’m trying to save the mission. That has always been my top priority.”
“Yeah, I’m still not clear on how this benefits the mission.”
“Yoongi said…” you start to say, but are cut off my Hoseok’s derisive snort. 
“Look, if you’re in love with Yoongi, just go date him, okay? Don’t feel obligated to include the rest of us out of pity.” 
You frown. “I’m not… I’m not in love with him. It’s just sex. Just biology.” 
“This isn’t you!” Hoseok argues back. “You hated the idea of anyone of us ever treating you that way. And now you just want all of us to… to… use you like that?”  He splutters out the end of the sentence.
“No one is using me! This is my plan! I’m in charge!”
He sighs. “Well, I can’t be a part of it. Excuse me.”
______
Taehyung finds you in the gym. It’s good to see him up and about, even if his arm is still in a sling. 
“Hey, so I need to talk to you about this, um, ape sex thing.” He fishes awkwardly into his pockets and pulls out his tablet.  Maybe Jimin was right. Is Taehyung going to be the first to take you up on your offer?
You pause your jog on the elliptical machine. You wish you weren’t so sweaty and gross for this conversation. Taehyung is such an intimidatingly attractive man with those strong eyebrows and that perfect skin. 
Taehyung opens up the tablet and flips to the form. It’s happening. He’s going to sign the form. Shit. Then what will you do? It’s one thing to say you want to have sex with your whole crew, but what if he’s hoping to go right now? You need a shower. 
Taehyung has really nice hands. Long strong fingers delicately navigating the touch screen. It seems totally improbable that a man this attractive would be into you, even if you were the only woman in the universe. It just adds to your suspicions that hormones are driving everyone crazy. Perhaps if you slept with him once, he’d lose all interest. 
He finds the form and then turns his gaze up to you, staring you down with those eyes. It’s a good thing that Taehyung rarely turns his full gaze on you, because it is almost too much to bear. Shit, is he just going to sign it? Is he waiting for you to give him some sort of signal?
“You can’t do this to Jimin,” he says.
“What?” Not what you were expecting. “Do what to Jimin?”
“This.” He gestures over the HR form. “Signing these forms with everyone. Having sex with everyone. You’re going to destroy Jimin.”
“Jimin’s the one who suggested this whole thing in the first place.” It’s a lie. You know its a lie. Or at least a gross exaggeration. But Jimin was the one who first brought up the idea of sharing. All for the benefit of the man in front of you now. 
“No way.” Taehyung scoffs, crossing his arms and raising an eyebrow. “No way was it Jimin’s idea that you sleep with the whole crew.” 
“Well…” You can’t bear his gaze anymore and look down at the floor. “He wanted me to sleep with you.”
That surprises Taehyung. He puts down the tablet. “What? Why would he want that?”
This is awkward. “He, um, thinks you’re in love with me.”
“What?” There is only surprise on Taehyung’s face. It’s actually a relief to see that Taehyung is just as shocked by that idea as you were. “Why does he think that?”
“I don’t know…” You feel kind of dumb now. Of course, Taehyung doesn’t feel that way about you. Look at him. “Cause you told him you were jealous. Cause you can’t stand to be in the same room as us…”
Taehyung bites his lip. “Oh, um, shit, sorry, that’s not what I meant.”
If Taehyung isn’t jealous of Jimin... 
“Taehyung…” He looks up, biting his lip. “What did you mean? Who are you jealous of?” 
Taehyung’s eyes widen, but he doesn’t say anything. Instead he reaches for his microphone and mutes it. Out of respect, you mute yours as well. He glances toward the camera in the corner of the room, then stands up and begins unzipping his jumpsuit. 
“Um…” You are distracted by the golden arms that peak from either side of the tank top as the zipper reaches his groin. “What are you doing?”
“Need something to block the camera.”
“We have towels,” you mutter.  But he’s already stripping out of his shirt. The musculature of his back ripples. He hangs the shirt off of the camera to block the rest of the room from view. 
“Yeah, but this way anyone watching will think we’re having sex.” His chest is just as attractive as his back and you flush at the sight of it. Mercifully, he zips back into his jumpsuit as he returns to his position in front of the exercise machine. 
“You want them to think we’re having sex?”
“Don’t you? It plays right into your whole save the mission with bonobo sex plan.”
“I suppose.” Though the plan was also supposed to be that there would be no more secrets between the crew. “What plan of yours does it play into?”
“The one where Jimin doesn’t realize I’m in love with him.”
“You’ve never tried to tell him?”
Taehyung laughs wryly and shakes his head. “How would that conversation go? Hey man, I know we’ve known each other for years and I’ve already seen you naked and that you just think of me as a friend, but I’m in love with you. I know that’s awkward but now you have to spend the next twelve years with me, knowing that I’m attracted to you when you don’t feel the same way.” Taehyung sighs. “Doesn’t sound like a good plan to me. If he doesn’t feel the same way, I’ve just ruined the friendship for nothing and then I don’t even have that.”
“Yeah… I get that.”  There’s something touching about realizing that Taehyung has been fighting the same battle as you for the last two years. 
“I couldn’t tell anyone before launch because what if they wouldn’t let me go then? You know?”
“Yeah, the director wasn’t big on sending anyone who might ‘complicate’ the mission.” The two of you share a sad knowing smile. 
“Yeah… And I thought it would be fine, you know? I like women too. I’d just date women until launch and no one would know. I wasn’t planning on falling in love with my roommate.”
“I don’t think any of us really knew what this would be like.”
“I knew it was going to be a problem. I should have pulled out…” 
Your mind flashes back to that moment of doubt when Hoseok talked you into still coming on the mission.
“But I couldn’t just let him go off into space without me. Even if he’d never feel the same way, at least he’d still be in my life.”
The emotion in Taehyung’s words makes your eyes begin to mist. “You really do love him.”
“Yeah,” Taehyung sighs again. “But he’s in love with you.”
“Well, he thinks he is.”
“What does that mean?”
“He only feels like that about me cause he thinks I’m the only option.”  You wonder if maybe he would feel differently if he knew about Taehyung’s feelings. 
Taehyung frowns and shakes his head. “You don’t give him enough credit.”
“Oh come on, you know him. How many women did he date while we were in training?”
“A few…” 
“And how many of them was he in love with before he found the next one?”  
Taehyung bites his lip. He can’t really argue with that. “So why are you with him then, if you don’t think it’s real?”
You shrug, rubbing your arm. “He wants me. It’s nice to feel wanted, I guess.”
“You know you could have that with any man on this ship right?”
You scoff. “They’re all suffering the same delusion. It’s only-available-vagina syndrome. I just want us all to fuck and get it out in the open. Maybe if we could get it out of our system, they would see I’m nothing special. And then we can get back to the mission.”
Taehyung eyes you up and down. “You don’t give yourself enough credit either.”
You shrug. “You wait and see. Jimin will get bored of me. They all will.”
The two of you both slump backwards in your seats, mulling over your shared woes.  Taehyung bends down and picks up the tablet again. “So what should I do with this?”
“Obivously, you don’t have to sign it. I should have realized that not everyone would be interested.”
“Jimin thinks I’m in love with you?”
“Yeah…”
“Is it okay if we let him think that for now? At least until I figure out how to tell him the truth?”
“Okay.”
Taehyung smiles and signs the bottom of the form, then sends it to you. Your phone lights up with a message. “Thank you,” he murmurs before he leaves. 
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chaoshomeschooler · 3 years
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1/29/21 - 3:40 AM
this is pretty long so here’s a read more
I’ve come to accept the fact that I simply do not operate in the daytime. The past several days I have ended up staying up until 4 saying “I’ll go to sleep soon” while getting nothing done. Then I sleep until some ungodly hour the next day - not like I’m in my bed sleeping until noon. No. I get up, go to work, then doze off at work between customers. Every time I fall asleep at work I get... scared? I hear these clicking sounds and I feel dread while I’m sleeping but I still just kind of sleep. It’s really not fun. But either way, I’ve been getting almost nothing done in the day because I sleep until really late (today I stayed home and I ended up being up for three hours then taking like a four hour nap) and then I get nothing done at night because I keep thinking I’ll go to sleep soon.
So today I’m just staying up all night, getting things done, and hopefully I’ll be so tired that I can get to sleep at a decent hour tomorrow, even if I end up dosing off all morning.
And guess what. It worked. I got an assignment done and I started on my next one. I’m still awake enough that I’m going to go work on a scholarship and a commission after this.
For me everything is about results and not method. Ideally I’d operate during regular hours but ya know - it may not be the right way but it’s the only thing that’s working for me right now.
Oh yeah and I’m actually using my desk for once in my life so I feel like a real student for once lol.
Stu-dna challenge days 27-29:
27. study in groups or study alone?
What’s a group?
JK umm when I used to be in co-ops (Classical Conversations or CC, for the initiated) and that one year I was at the career center I did have several group projects and breakouts in classes - I hated the group projects because either I was the only one who did any work (career center) or I was stuck with someone who hated me/the group was so big it was hard to get anything done (CC). So nah, in most cases I would rather study alone unless it’s with my one friend who actually cares about her grades like I do.
28. do you like the cold? what are your favourite winter activities?
I don’t necessarily like the cold but it’s better than the heat bc you can put on layers or use a space heater - in the heat there’s only so much you can do.
Uhhh my favorite winter activities would really just be anything Christmas related. Just hanging out at home and decorating or baking or making gifts for my friends or anything like that
29. do you have any hobbies?
I find it hard to define hobbies? Like I sew and crochet but that’s also my job. I learned embroidery over the summer and I also write but I don’t have time for either of those things any more.
I also play piano but it’s kind of a school subject due to the like intensity of my learning that (wow I can’t english rn). Cello is more of a hobby for me because I don’t take lessons anymore - but that’s another thing that I don’t have much time for.
spell-studies challenge:
3. Wed. Jan 27: what are you most excited for this semester/challenge?
This isn’t school related but it’s happening this semester - I’m going to go visit Belmont University and my Adult Friends aka my favorite band who all went there are gonna meet up with me there.
I guess describing them as my favorite band makes it sound really unrealistic - they’re a super tiny band and I met them when they were even way less famous - I started talking to them and one of them commissioned something from me etc etc now we talk on and off on social media and whenever they come to my area we hang out. Also they’re not that much older than me I think they’re like 7 or so years older.
4. Thur. Jan 28: Wanna post a work space pic?
I added the pic at the top of the post before I even saw this prompt lol :)
5. Fri. Jan 29: TGIF what’s today’s ~vibe~?
today’s (yesterday’s???) vibe is ✨disappointment✨ I slept way too much and got nothing done yaaayyyyy - so by the time my parents got home (they work like a million hours a day so I don’t get to see them much) I was still working so I couldn’t spend any time with them. I’ve been trying to spend more time with them bc I’m graduating this spring/summer (*barf*)
but the vibe going into the rest of today is ✨fuck you you better get some shit done and tire yourself out so you can go to sleep fuck you and your bad habits✨
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hobeymakar · 4 years
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Unapologetically | C. Makar Part 1
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Chapter word count: 3,526
A/N: Title from the song Unapologetically by Kelsea Ballerini. This is my first chaptered fic in a long time and my first written on here, so please be kind. This fic is based off a set of very vivid reoccurring dreams I’ve had over the last couple of months that involve Cale and like the true psycho I am, I wrote the big things that happened in those dreams down. Then I decided recently to just turn it to a fic, so this is pretty self-indulgent. Is it possibly narcissistic of me to write a fic about me? Maybe, but I’m gonna write it anyway. This first chapter is gonna be a lil boring and weird because it has a lot of time skips but Chapter 2 will be much more exciting and way better
Shoutouts: @pizzasloot and @hockey-and-wine for being my biggest cheerleaders for writing for this fic in the gc and also shoutout to @grenawitka​ for always keeping the gc lit. I love you girls!
Warnings: explicit language, alcohol use
-
Tatyana “Taty” Marie Ventura or “Ace” as she is now being known as, never thought that when she started a podcast in the comfort of her Rhode Island home, that she would kind of blow up. Taty started the Ace of Hockey podcast because she wanted a career in hockey media and wanted to do it her way, being unapologetically herself. She started the podcast and started messaging hockey players and other athletes in hopes that they would come onto the podcast to talk about diversity and inclusion in the sport.
That’s how she finds herself on an early October evening receiving a message from Cale Makar on how he’s a fan of the podcast. She internally screams because she never thought an actual hockey player would listen to the podcast. She assumed only hockey fans would listen to the podcast and that it would never reach the notoriety of other hockey podcasts.
From: calemakar_
Hey, just wanted to say that I’m a big fan of your podcast. Buddy of mine showed it to me and I think it’s fantastic. It’s helping me learn how to be a better ally
To: calemakar_
Thank you so much, that means a lot honestly!
From: calemakar_
You’re welcome. I’ve been showing it to the team and they think it’s great for them to learn how to be better allies
To: calemakar_
Wow, that means so much! I just want people to know that hockey is great but it would be so much better if it became inclusive to everyone regardless of sex, gender, race, ethnicity, religion, etc. I just want hockey to really be for everyone
From: calemakar_
That's what we all want. We don't want anyone to feel like they can't play or enjoy hockey because of who they are
She doesn't know how to keep the conversation because she's awkward and just lets the dm sit there. She turns her attention to the latest hockey news and figuring out who's gonna be her next guest for the podcast.
A few hours later, she sees a follow request on her personal IG account and not the podcast account. She sees it's from Cale and is confused on why he would want to follow her personal account. She barely posts stuff about the podcast on there and uses it more to keep up with family with the occasional posts promoting the podcast and the guests. She accepts the request and doesn't think anything of it.
A few days later, she notices that he's been liking her posts and viewing her stories. He's been seeing her interact with family and friends and she still doesn't understand why he cares enough to keep up with her personal account. It starts becoming weird when he adds her on snapchat.
She sends him a dm on instagram to make sure it's actually him and not someone pretending to be him.
To: calemakar_
This might sound totally weird but did you just add me on snapchat?
From: calemakar_
Yeah I'm sorry. Josty thought it would be funny to hijack my phone and add you
To: calemakar_
No need to apologize, I just wanted to make sure it was actually you and not someone trying to be you to catfish girls
From: calemakar_
Yeah no, definitely my account
She accepts him as a friend on Snapchat and sends him a message.
To: Cale Makar
Hope it's okay I added you back
From: Cale Makar
Yeah, that's cool. You didn't have to tho. Don't want you to feel like you had to
To: Cale Makar
Trust me I added you back because I wanted to. I don't just accept anybody
She hits send before she can even think twice about it but then she reads it back and wants the ground to swallow her whole. She panics as she watches the delivered turn into a read and the little bubbles show up saying he's typing. It feels like forever before Cale sends a response back.
From: Cale Makar
Well I'm glad you didn't add me back out of pity
She doesn't know how to respond to that right away so she opens up other messages and posts updates on her work on her story. She goes back to the messages and starts typing a response, not wanting to leave him on read forever.
To: Cale Makar
Why would anybody do that?
She exits out of it and hopes that her attempts at extending a conversation aren't met with disappointment.
From: Cale Makar
I admit you got me there
To: Cale Makar
I get people to say that a lot
From: Cale Makar
Never picked you as the type to brag
To: Cale Makar
There's a lot of layers to me and a lot of things you don't know about me
From: Cale Makar
Well I hope I get to know more about you
She blinks multiple times not knowing if the message was actually real. After blinking several times, she realizes the message was real and she lets out a squeal. Is he actually flirting with her? She pinches herself because she must be dreaming. There's no way her favorite hockey player and crush is flirting with her. Shit like that doesn't happen to her! She has zero game and has been on a grand total of zero dates in her life. She has had zero boyfriends and girlfriends in her life, so this is something brand new for her.
Maybe she's reading it wrong? Maybe he's just being polite and isn't actually flirting. She decides it's better not to stress it and just go with the flow. 
That's how she approaches the next couple of weeks with her pumping out content for her podcast, working her actual day job, and working on her social media game for the podcast. She also dms tons of people she sees as potential guests on the podcast. 
Her conversations with Cale become more frequent as she eventually finds herself sending him snaps daily. He actually feels comfortable enough to comment on her posts on her personal IG page now and she honestly doesn't know how this is all even real.
Like before she's not stressing it and is going with the flow. However, on the day of Cale's 22nd birthday, she gets hit with a message that causes her to freak out a little.
From: Cale Makar
Hey, is it cool if I got your number? It's much easier if I can just text you. I like you and want to keep getting to know you more
She hyperventilates because she has never had another human being shoe this much interest in her, her whole life. She pinches herself to make sure it's real and it really is real. Cale Makar actually asked for her number. She doesn't know if she should be jumping for joy or preparing for something to go wrong. This is completely uncharted waters for her and she doesn't know if she should go with her heart or her mind. Her mind is telling her not to do it, but her heart is telling her to do it. After a minute, she decides to go with her heart.
To: Cale Makar
Yeah, that's totally cool! (xxx-xxx-xxxx)
She sees a text from an unknown number a minute later pop up on her phone
From: xxx-xxx-xxxx
Hey, it's Cale
She saves the number under the name "Cale 🥰" and types out a response
To: Cale 🥰
Hey, happy birthday btw! Hope you're having fun!
From: Cale 🥰
Thank you I'm in Calgary rn with my family
To: Cale 🥰
Glad you're having fun with them
From: Cale 🥰
Thank you it's good to be back home
To: Cale 🥰
I can imagine! I'll let you get back to your family
She focuses on getting ready for Halloween, which also happens to be her sister's birthday. Her sister is turning 21 this year and she wants to make the most of it, even in the midst of a pandemic. They plan on going to Salem, Massachusetts with family and throwing a little party at a cousin's house in Brookline, Massachusetts. She sees Cale post pictures and videos on his Snapchat story of him and his family celebrating his birthday. She sees all his teammates wishing him a happy birthday on Instagram and Twitter.
As she’s getting ready to go to bed that night, she gets a video call from Cale.
“Hello?” she asks, not knowing why he would be calling her.
“Ace!” he shouts, causing her to cringe slightly.
“How’s your birthday going?” she asks.
“Great! I’m with my brother and some buddies from back home! We got a bonfire going on right now!” he explains, showing off the fire and his brother and friends.
She wants the ground to swallow her whole because she looks absolutely disgusting with her hair tied up in a bun, and old URI sweatpants and an URI sweatshirt on. She has no makeup on and she’s pretty sure she has some acne on her face.
“Hey Ace! I’m Taylor, Cale’s brother!” Taylor shouts in excitement.
She can clearly tell that he’s buzzed, as well as Cale.
“Hey Taylor,” she smiles, waving at him politely.
His buddies also introduce themselves and she can tell that they’re also slightly buzzed. A part of her hopes that they aren’t driving and are gonna make it back home safely whether tonight or the following day.
“You should come!” one of his friends suggests.
“I’d love to but I live in America and the border is still closed,” she replies, feeling slightly awkward.
“It’s a shame! I know Cale really misses his girl right now!” another friend chimes in, causing her to almost choke on her wine.
“I’m not his-”
“He won’t stop talking about you! He’s got it bad for you!” another friend adds, causing her to blush even more.
If the ground would swallow her up right now, that would be amazing because she can't believe the shit that she’s hearing right now. She doesn’t know if it’s the alcohol that has his friends saying that but a part of her wishes it’s true. God, a part of her wants him to want her because she definitely likes him. She likes everything about him but she’s too much of a loser to put herself out there more. So she just lets him do all the talking and flirting because once again, she has no game.
“Shut up Taylor!” Cale cries out, shoving his brother lightly.
“Well you seem to be having a fun time with your friends,” she says, not wanting to bring up anything that was said about his feelings for her. 
“It would be better if you were here,” he adds, his voice dropping slightly in volume.
“Yeah, well maybe we’ll meet one day,” she adds, not wanting to sound desperate to meet him or anything.
“When I get back to the States, I’ll make that a reality,” he replies, sounding sincere for being slightly intoxicated.
She’s reminded of the saying that drunken words are sober thoughts and gets a warm feeling in her stomach.
“Well I’ll let you keep having fun, birthday boy. I’ll talk to you later,” she smiles.
“Bye Ace,” he smiles back, before ending the call.
She immediately refills her glass of wine because she’s definitely too sober to be thinking about all the feelings Cale manages to give her every time they talk. She eventually falls asleep and if she dreamed about being in Calgary with Cale, she’ll blame it on the alcohol fucking with her dreams.
The next day is a busy one for Taty as she celebrates her sister’s 21st birthday in the best way she can while in the middle of a pandemic. They go to Salem, Massachusetts and have a blast doing many Halloween-related activities and then once it gets late, they head down to their cousin’s place in Brookline, Massachusetts to watch Halloween movies and to have a good time. Her sister decides to get drunk and Taty posts all their adventures on her Snapchat and her Instagram. She also sees that Cale has been posting his Halloween adventures on Snapchat, which aren’t as exciting this year because there’s no Avs Halloween party this year due to it still being the offseason and not everyone on the team is in Denver at the moment.
The next few weeks go by for Taty and it eventually gets to the point that she’s video chatting with Cale every day. They sometimes will stay up until late at night just talking and getting to know each other. Every day she’s becoming more comfortable and it’s on the first day of training camp, where she decides she’s finally gonna grow a pair and let him know how she feels.
He calls her after a long day at training camp and she actually has the time to talk to him as she isn’t working on anything for the podcast or her day job. 
“How was camp?” she asks him, as she locks herself in her room.
The last thing she needs is for her nosy ass sisters to eavesdrop on her conversations with Cale.
“It was tiring but fun. It was great to be out there with the guys again, even though everything is so weird with the virus going on,” he explains.
“Oh I bet, I can’t imagine all the testing and the extra precautions you guys have to take. The whole season is gonna be super weird huh,” she replies.
“Yeah, weird is a bit of an understatement,” he chuckles lightly.
“I really like you,” she blurts out, then immediately wishes the ground would swallow her whole.
She buries her face in her hands and contemplates ending the call to save herself from further embarrassment.
“Oh thank god! I was starting to think you didn’t really feel the same,” he admits, biting his lip.
“No I definitely like you. It’s just I’m new to this. I’ve never dated before or anything. I’m kind of a giant loser if you haven’t already caught on,” she admits, almost rambling at the end.
“Yeah no, you’re not a loser! You’re the coolest, most fun girl I’ve ever talked to and I just want to keep getting to know you because I really like you,” he assures her.
"So are we putting a label on this? Are we dating?" she asks.
"I guess you can say we're long distance dating," he chuckles lightly.
"I did know our video chats were considered dates," she teases.
"I was seeing them as dates and I want our future ones to be considered dates," he confesses.
"Alright so set up our next date," you tease.
"I know you're recording for the podcast tomorrow so what about Wednesday?" he asks.
"I'm off work Wednesday so that would be perfect. What time works for you?" she asks him.
"8pm my time," he answers.
"Yeah that works for me," she smiles.
"So it's a date?" he asks.
"Yeah it's a date," she smiles, getting a warm feeling in her stomach.
She tells him about some funny stories involving her family and he tells her some funny stories from training camp. They chat for hours and before she knows it, it's past midnight and she has to go to work in the morning. 
“I need to go to bed. I have work in the morning. Goodnight Cale,” she yawns, waving at him
“Goodnight love,” he waves back, ending the call. 
If she cheeses a little at the fact he called her love, no one is around to see it. 
December goes by pretty quickly and she feels bad that her calls with Cale become less frequent. December is the busiest month at work because everyone is doing Christmas shopping (being a store manager is hard work) and she finds herself working double the amount of hours she worked before the holiday season. Add doing the podcast three times a week and she’s absolutely gassed. Luckily, Cale doesn’t hold it against her because he starts getting more busy with preseason starting and his parents coming down for the holidays. Taylor is currently in the middle of his final season in the AJHL so he can’t make the trip down to Denver for the holidays. They text each other every day throughout the month however, and she manages to call him on Christmas and on New Year’s Eve, asking him if he’s excited for the new season to start on the 2nd.
2021 starts off worse than 2020 started because of the pandemic but Taty manages to make the best of it. She watches the Winter Classic while on video call with Cale. Luckily, the Avalanche start their season off at home again this year. The following day, she finds herself rushing home from work to be able to catch the Avs first game of the season against the Wild. She makes it home and takes a quick shower before changing into her Cale jersey and joggers. She quickly eats dinner before going into her room. She puts the game on and makes it just in time for the players to come out to the ice. She watches the game and manages to text Cale throughout the game knowing that he won’t see the string of texts until after the game. He finishes the game with one assist and 2 hits, as the Avs win 4-2 to start off the new season on a high note.
As she’s getting ready for bed, she gets a call from Cale.
“Hey, great game,” she smiles, trying not to show how tired she is.
“Oh shit, I just realized how late it is over there,” he sighs, not wanting to keep her up.
“It’s okay. I always stay up past my bedtime to talk to you,” she teases.
“How was work?” he asks.
“Annoying. We’re winding down from the holiday season but we still got a lot of people shopping and returning stuff,” she explains.
“I don’t know how you do it honestly, being so young and running a store, I mean,” he explains.
“Yeah well luckily I’m only an assistant manager,” she replies.
“Still pretty incredible what you do,” he assures her.
“Says the NHL superstar,” she scoffs.
“Hey, I’m not a superstar at all! I’m just another player like everybody else trying to be the best at my position,” he explains.
“Why do you have to be so humble all the time?” she teases.
“It’s just who I am,” he shrugs.
“And I love you for it but like just admit you’re a superstar,” she replies.
“Fine, I’m a superstar. Happy now?” he teases.
“The happiest. When are your parents going back to Calgary?” she asks, switching the subject.
“Tomorrow,” he answers.
“I’m glad you got to have them with you for the holidays, though,” she adds.
“Yeah, it was great seeing them again. I just wish Taylor could’ve been here,” he replies.
“Yeah well you’ll see him once his season ends and on the bright side, he’ll be at UMass next season,” she adds.
“Yeah I just miss him. I always go home for Christmas and this year I couldn’t,” he explains.
“Yeah I can’t imagine what that’s like but it will get better,” she assures him.
“Yeah I know it will,” he nods.
“I wish I could be there to make you feel better,” she sighs.
“Yeah, well we’ll see each other next month,” he smiles, a hopeful tone in his voice.
“February 5th can’t come fast enough. I’m gonna blow you away with the best interview you’ve ever done,” she teases, referring to her interviewing him for the podcast.
“I guess we’ll have to see about that,” he teases back.
“You wound me, Makar!” she fake gasps.
“I’ll make it up to you with a killer real first date,” he smiles.
“I’ll hold you to that. I expect to be really wooed,” she teases.
“It’s gonna be the best date you’ve ever been on,” he almost guarantees.
“It’s gonna be the first date I’ve ever been on,” she informs him.
“I know. That’s why it’s gonna be the best you’ve ever been on,” he jokes, causing her to roll her eyes.
“You’re so funny, Makar,” she deadpans.
“Stop acting like I don’t make you laugh all the time, Ventura,” he teases.
“What happened to humble Cale? I like him better than this smug one I got here,” she teases back.
“Stop acting like you don’t like it,” he replies.
“Yeah, I like every side to you,” she admits.
“Well that’s good because I like every side of you,” he smiles.
She feels her cheeks heat up and that warm fuzzy feeling return to her stomach. Is this what falling in love feels like? She’s never felt this way before and god, she hopes the feeling never fades because it’s amazing. No wonder people love falling in love so much, it’s magical and she hopes she doesn’t fuck it up. She just counts down the days until February 5th praying to god that nothing goes wrong once they finally meet.
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peakatseven · 3 years
Note
🎸 happiness, because this song is my spirit animal lol
And if you'd like you could do these too, I'm super indecisive so I couldn't shortlist oops. You don't have to do them all, I'm just horrible at choosing:
🌕 across our great divide, there is a glorious sunrise
📖 +📜 I'm curious
Congratulations on 700!!
u gave me a reason to go back and review some of what i already wrote for this novel which comes in really handy the day before camp nano starts SOO thank you so much ily <3 i dont have my guitar with me rn so i cant do the cover just yet, im sorry, BUT i can do this:
here’s a lil snippet of my work in progress “Swing By The Lake”. I’m really proud of how this scene turned out even though i put off writing it for the longest time because i hate writing sex scenes. it’s not an actual sex scene, but it pretty clearly leads to that. kindda weird that this is the first thing that you’re gonna read from me because i NEVER write sex scenes but whatever it’s actually pretty significant to the plot because it’s the start of Charlie realizing how much she actually cares for Agustina which is just... *sigh* perfect
things u should probably know before this: charlie is a 17 y/o girl who’s vacationing in this beach town where she met Agustina, a 21 y/o photographer from Argentina who is also on a trip in this beach town. they’ve been hanging out at the cliff of the hill that separates each other’s houses for most of the summer, both at sunrise and sunset because that’s just what people do in the argentine provinces and its also romantic af. it also kindda fits the feeling of your writing prompt so its a win win! i hope you enjoy this :)
~ i’m celebrating reaching 700 followers!! so if u want to, you can send me some of these and ill do my best to create something cool for you! ~
Charlie opened her eyes after what felt like a few seconds. The room was still dark, but she was restless. Looking out the window, the moon shined full and bright over the still ocean. In a split second decision, she grabbed a sweater before heading down to the beach. With her shoes on her hand, she walked along the shore. The water ran up to her calf sometimes, a bit too cold when mixed with the fog that filled her lungs. Charlie wondered whether it was too late or too early to be out by herself, but there was no better hour to sort things out in one’s mind. If it was truly Noemi who had seen Charlie and Agustina together at the beach, why hadn’t she come to tell her parents already? Was she really going to keep the secret for Charlie without her even asking? It was hard to believe. Noemi must be up to something, waiting for the right time and way to say it. Or to gather evidence. But, why? Was there really a chance for Charlie to deny her accusations and get away with it? As all the possible—and impossible—scenarios came to her, Charlie collected pebbles from the shore, her long nightgown served as a great bag to store them momentarily. She came to realize that it was near impossible to be anxious or fearful in such a calm atmosphere. Alone in the beach, under the stars and surrounded by mist, touching the water while collecting stones. Silence only being interrupted by the ocean against her freezing legs. It was as if God tried to comfort her with nature. As she kept walking, there were more and more stones underneath her feet. So much so, that by the time she came to the end of East-Watch beach, it hurt to walk barefoot. Charlie got away from shore and sat on a stone at the bottom of the hill. The same one where she’d had breakfast with Agustina almost 24 hours prior. She put on her sandals and made a split second decision. It almost didn’t come as a surprise when she found Agustina sitting on the cliff, just like the time they were both there for the first time. The foreigner couldn’t see her, but she was most certainly aware of her— the stones bounced on one another as she walked. Charlie sucked in a breath and walked slowly closer to Agustina. She wasn’t sure if what she was doing was right, it was a much wiser decision to just leave and never talk to her again. Deny everything Noemi might claim once they were back home and forget that whole summer even happened. It was a wiser and safer choice. Yet there she was, hand over the lady’s shoulder, almost touching. “Why are you here?” She said without turning around. Her voice was cold, colder than the fog or the ocean. This one froze Charlie inside out. Silence. “If you are not going to say anything, you should just leave.” Charlie breathed in to speak, but her mouth didn't obey. She remembered the last time they were together and how abruptly she'd run away. Agustina had nothing to do with Noemi, she didn’t know how terrifying it was to see her at that beach. And to top it all, Charlie avoided her when she walked, probably the entire way, to The Saltbox Inn just to see her. What was there to say after hurting her in such a way? "I'm sorry doesn't cover it." She finally spoke, sitting down and leaving the stones just behind Agustina. She didn't turn, but her breathing was louder. Faltering. Charlie hadn't noticed from afar, but Agustina went there to cry. "Oh, Agus." She said as she sat down behind her and embraced her into a hug that wasn’t reciprocated. "I'm so sorry." "Why are you here?" Agustina's voice was weak, it broke Charlie to hear such a light-hearted lady like Agustina be in such pain. And it was because of her. "I couldn't sleep." "Why?" Charlie took in a deep breath. "The other day, I thought someone from my town was there and saw us." Charlie said, she rested her forehead against Agustina's hair. She meant to go for a kiss on the cheek, but she was turned away. "So you naturally pushed me and ran off." Agustina scoffed. Charlie was speechless. She hadn't really been thinking at the time. Hell, she barely even remembered what actually happened. "And
then you never came back or called. And then when I walked the entire way to your place… you saw me, and ran away as fast as possible. Again. Of course I'm sorry doesn't cover it." "But I am sorry, Agus, please tell me what can I do to make it better?" Charlie's own voice cracked a little. She felt awful for hurting the girl beside her, she'd done nothing but given her the best summer she'd had in years. "Charlie." Agustina sighted and covered her face with her hands, shaking herself away from Charlie's hug. They were still side by side at the cliff’s end, their legs lightly brushing against one another as they swung with the wind. But to Charlie, not hugging Agustina felt like they were miles apart. She sat back before speaking. "Come here, please." Charlie begged. Agustina lightly turned her head, giving Charlie a chance to catch those slightly swollen green eyes. In an attempt to lighten the situation, she grabbed one stone and threw it over the cliff. It bounced off of a stone and then made it to the calm ocean, which brought a hint of a smile to Agustina’s face. "Please." She offered another stone out to the Latina, who grabbed it and sat back and rested her back on Charlie. Charlie pulled her closer, just enough so she could hold her with both arms around her waist. The sun must have been rising at that moment, because Agustina's face lit up in all the shades of blue. She threw the stone over the cliff, but Charlie didn’t hear whether or not it reached the ocean. She was too hung up on how Agustina’s lips looked especially soft from the side, glistening with what remained of her tears. Charlie brushed her thumb over the lower lip as softly as possible. "I'm sorry." She whispered before going for a quick kiss barely on the side of her mouth. "I'm sorry." She repeated and leaned closer, asking for permission. Agustina slightly turned and that was enough. Unlike any other kiss they had shared before, this one felt like they were both savoring every second. They were both so depraved of the other that every moment, every move was sacred. "I'm sorry." Charlie whispered as she moved from Agustina's lips to her jaw, drying the new tears with her own lips. She kept apologizing in between her approaches. All she wanted was to make Agustina feel better. She did everything she could think off to comfort her. Charlie kept kissing every inch of Agustina’s exposed skin, staring into her eyes before going further— silently asking if it was okay to do so. Charlie let her body take over without giving much thought to her actions. They were soon enough throwing their clothes aside, condemning everything that dared come in between them. There was nothing Charlie wanted— needed— more than to be closer to Agustina. As close as humanly possible. She needed to take the pain she caused away. “Charlie.” Agustina sighed when Charlie reached her stomach. She used a tone Charlie had never heard before. It reminded her of the prayers sung at Church, delicate and desperate with a hint of fear. Charlie froze. “Is this okay?” Agustina let out an audible sight, caressing Charlie’s cheek with her fingers, softly guiding her to look up.  Agustina’s eyes were still a bit red, but they were also a slightly darker shade of green. “I-” She looked for the right words to speak. “You don’t have to do this.” “But I want to.” Charlie answered without missing a beat. She smiled shyly at the older girl, looking down as she soon realized what she had just said and what was about to happen. “But… I don’t know how…” She trailed off, resting her forehead on Agustina’s belly. “It’s okay,” She whispered. “I’ll guide you.”
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hanwooz · 3 years
Text
Interview tag~
tagged by:  @xuseokgyu​​ Thank you so much for tagging me! 
Name/nickname:
kellie
Pronouns:
she/her
Star sign:
cancer but i really feel like i’m not a typical cancer most of the time lmfao maybe because both my rising and moon sign is sagittarius? anyone an expert on astrology and care to tell me how it influences my personality LOL
Height:
5′3.5″ (about 161 cm)
Time:
i’m working and currently on lunch rn and it’s almost over lol 12:21 PM
When is your birthday:
july 10
Nationality:
american let me out
Favourite band/groups:
seventeen ofc but i also listen to other groups out there, can name any and i’ve prob heard at least one song of theirs lol
Favourite solo artists:
chungha! i also listen to a lot of kr&b and i listen to a lot of songs from sweet the kid these days!
Song stuck in your head:
magnetic by rain and jackson 
Last movie you watched
i think... it might’ve been i saw the devil (2010),  i don’t recommend for the light hearted as it tackles very uncomfortable topics 
Last show you binged:
i finished hotel del luna just yesterday! i dropped this drama back in 2019 but i decided to pick it up again because i had nothing else to watch, finished in like three days 
When you created your blog:
like a few weeks after i got into svt lol july 6th, 2015
Last thing you googled:
is (company name) legit because i got an email from a recruiter haha
Other blogs:
i don’t have any other active blogs T_T my infinite blog is @soowons​ but i rarely go on it
Why i chose my url:
this is a shared blog so we just combined our biases’ names = han (from hansol) and wooz (from woozi). it wasn’t intentional but hanwoo also means korean beef and we thought that was pretty funny LOL
Average hours of sleep:
5-6 hours on the weekdays usually i know that’s so bad but i really don’t feel a difference when i get 7-8 hours of sleep vs 5-6 hours is it just ME 
Lucky number:
173. i feel like i’ve had this number as part of my locker combination for so long and it was very easy to remember
Instruments:
i don’t play any instruments unfortunately.. i wish i said yes to piano lessons when i had the chance lol
What i’m currently wearing:
a maroon 5 t-shirt i got from one of their concerts and just regular pajama pants i received on christmas from my aunt
Dream job:
i don’t have one actually i just don’t want to work and get money LMAO but that’s impossible so i guess i want a regular desk job similar to the one i have now but with a way better salary
Dream trip:
i reaaaallly want to visit japan one day and maybe go back to korea again because there were so many things i wasn’t able to fit into my itinerary the last time i was there!
Favourite food
the baked shrimp toast (i hope it’s called this in english i don’t even know) my mom makes for special occasions!
Favourite song:
depends on my mood but today i am feeling twenty twenty by pentagon because i also finished the drama the song was the main OST for not too long ago!
Top three fictional universes you’d like to live in:
1) harry potter maybe? 2) percy jackson 3) marvel 
thanks for reading if you got this far lol i had fun doing this!
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xxcureangelxx · 3 years
Note
5, 9, 10, 13, 20, 21, 24, 25, 28, 30-35, 38-42, 44-46, 50, 52, 54, 60-62, 66, 71-74, 86-91, 96, 100! 😊
okay I literally have no clue how old this is and if I'm even taking the questions from the right post but here goes I guess? 🙈
<u>5. What is your favorite Color?</u>
PURPLE
<u>9. How tall are you?</u>
about 1,70 meters or 5'7"
<u>10. What shoe size are you?</u>
size 40-41, I think that's about 8 in US sizes?
<u>13. What talents do you have?</u>
uhhh good question... not sure if it counts but I guess I'm quite good at a lot if things but can't do anything extraordinarily well?
<u>20. Are you religious?</u>
Absolutely not. Due to family history and a lot of other things I'm actually against it a lot but people can do whatever they feel like is right for them as long as they don't harm others with it.
<u>21. Have you ever been to the hospital?</u>
Yes, quite a lot actually. practically grew up in hospitals as a baby because of kidney issues, broke both my legs with 4 years old, had to revisit for tests a lot during my childhood because of the kidney issue. it calmed down afterwards until I was back in hospital last year because of my terrible mental health and I'm currently in a rehabilitation clinic for it as well.
<u>24. Baths or showers?</u>
Shower's because we don't have a bathtub
<u>25. What color socks are you wearing?</u>
currently none, I love going barefoot, but usually I wear white, gray or black. I know... I'm a bad gay.. no rainbow socks (;ŏ﹏ŏ)
<u>28. What type of music do you like?</u>
you know.... I hate this question with a passion even though I love music so I'll just throw in my yt-playlist here and everyone who's interested can look through it to get a picture xD not sorted in any way and not a conclusive list at all, I just add songs as I find them
<u>30. How many pillows do you sleep with?</u>
mostly just one at a time but I've got two different ones. one is the normal fluffy kinda pillow, the other is made of some kinda foam material and rather thin.
<u>31. What position do you usually sleep in?</u>
I'm always lying on the side! have been doing that since I was a baby too.
<u>32. How big is your house?</u>
compared to what? 🙈 I'd say decent size for 5 people to live in, would have space for 1-2 more if rooms were used differently but definitely not enough to comfortably live with 12 or even more people like my family used to. we've got like 3 proper sleeping rooms (one of which is the attic so not very nice in terms of heat and the staircase is smack in the middle of the room), a kitchen, a dining room, a big living room, a tiny bathroom that barely fits a toilet and shower, and the basement is a mix of storage, electrics and stuff, washing room/utility room and it's got another smaller room that's been turned back into a small workshop but used to be the room of my brother and later my grandmother.
<u>33. What do you typically have for breakfast?</u>
I guess this is where it shows that I'm german but we usually just eat bread (preferably whole grain) with cheese or slices of salami or ..meat sausage? is that a proper translation? 🤨 idk... it's rather simple really. on the weekend maybe buns and boiled eggs. on the occasion that I'm too tired for it or don't have enough time I eat cereals but it's not very common when I'm at work/school
<u>34. Have you ever fired a gun?</u>
No, and I don't want to
<u>35. Have you ever tried archery?</u>
Yes!! I did last year when I was in the hospital and it was super fun! was quite good at it as well, even for my first try 😤
<u>38. What's the longest you've ever gone without sleep?</u>
I think about 3 days? if we count "barely unconscious for a few hours" as sleep that is... otherwise no clue...my memory of the bad sleepless time is quite hazy lol
<u>39. Do you have any scars?</u>
yeah, quite a few tbh. got 2 huge ones from surgeries due to my kidney issues, well they look like 2 but it's actually multiple ones since they simply cut open party of the old ones again, tiny hooman apparently have very little skin. then I got some other ones here and there from accidents, general dumbness, etc, like when I cut through my sunday morning bun and almost cut half of the tip of my finger off because my mother sharpened the knife and didn't tell me or that time as a kid I couldn't wait for my ironing pearl pictures to be done and burned myself on the hot iron, mostly stuff like that.
<u>40. Have you ever had a secret admirer?</u>
I mean.. if they're a secret... how would I know? ;) not sure if it counts that it took me months to realize I had a crush on my best friend and the feelings were reciprocated and I was too blind to see the signs?
<u>41. Are you a good liar?</u>
Nope. People actually think I'm lying more often than I lie... so.... :/
<u>42. Are you a good judge of character?</u>
I'm.. honestly not sure what this one means? like, am I able to judge what kind of character a person has after barely meeting them or smth? if so, I'm terrible at it
<u>44. Do you have a strong accent?</u>
in german? nope. in english? hmm hard to judge since I rarely hear myself speak. I think the stuff I do know how to pronounce is mostly okay but since I learned it through reading I'm simply unsure of a lot of pronunciations. 'also'.... I can not for the life of me pronouns that word no matter how many times I hear it... it's kinda become a quirk after some classmates pointed it out to me and I'm incredibly aware how terrible I say the word but.... just can't get rid of it ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
<u>45. What is your favorite accent?</u>
I.. actually really love the way my best friend talks? 👉👈 they're french btw. just... typical me for struggling to understand them though, already terrible at it in german too...
<u>46. What is your personality type?</u>
honestly, I don't think I can answer that. I'm big on self loathing and everything's pretty shitty so, no thanks
<u>50. Left or right handed?</u>
Right handed. but does it even count id I'm bad at doing things with that hand too? lol
<u>52. Favorite food?</u>
hmmmm tough question... not the biggest fan of food in general a lot of the time... probably Züricher Geschnetzeltes
<u>54. Are you a clean or a messy person?</u>
Definitely messy. my allergies did not like this post trying to clean and tidy up more often though. my depression does not like this post either
<u>60. Do you talk to yourself?</u>
sometimes. quite a bit when watching movies or if I mess stuff up
<u>61. Do you sing to yourself?</u>
barely. got a lot of bad experiences with that so i keep my singing to a minimum. my shower is a great listener though
<u>62. Are you a good singer?</u>
I was in a choir for a few years when I went to 'middle school' and I had like one solo part once but other than that I can't really say because I barely ever sing in front of people
<u>66. Do you like long or shor hair?</u>
this question is currently my absolute nemesis.. I've got suuuper duper long hair and have had it ever since elementary school and I used to be super happy with it and sometimes I still am happy with it but other days, depending on where I'm at genderwise, I absolutely hate it and I just want to take the closest scissors and cut it all off... currently haven't had the guts to look for new hair styles though... but in other people? or women more specifically? I love long hair 🥺
<u>71. What makes you nervous?</u>
Or the shorter question: what doesn't make me nervous... I'd say pretty much everything has got the potential to make me nervous. I'm an overthinker, anxiety is a big thing for me and ptsd makes me scared of almost everything. so.. yeah... sucks to be me sometimes ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
<u>72. Are you scared of the dark?</u>
Yes, very
<u>73. Do you correct people when they make mistakes?</u>
I try not to but sadly I sometimes do, even if it's not my place to. I really don't like that part and hope I'll be able to learn not to sometime
<u>74. Are you ticklish?</u>
Yes and I hate it 😭
<u>86. What are you allergic to?</u>
again, easier question: what am I not allergic to... it's... a lot... like, really a lot. with the test on the skin of my arm I reacted to every single substance and the more thorough blood test lead to much of the same result. the absolute worst are birch trees (pitty, love those), then the usual pollen of pretty much every tree or flower, all animals with fur or feathers, dust and... yeah list goes on and on, you get the picture... :/
<u>87. Do you keep a journal?</u>
no.. have tried to multiple times in the past but never made it more than a week... too depressing to write and read... the therapist at the rehab clinic is currently forcing me to try a positivity diary for the millionths time, can't even get that done each day even though I'm doing it on my phone and get notifications to do it each evening...
<u>88. What do your parents do?</u>
making my life hell lol.. okay on a serious note, my father was a car electrician, he's retired by now, my mother is a housewife, she used to work different jobs before her first kid, later on she took care of my grandmother who was suffering from dementia, got some money and retirement points for that too.
<u>89. Do you like your age?</u>
I-... I don't know? it's weird because I both feel a lot younger and a lot older than I am rn....
<u>90. What makes you angry?</u>
another tough question... I actually have anger issues in that way that I'm barely capable of feeling anger... used to be worse but I already worked a lot on it in therapy so there's at least some there now... in the past I simply started to cry and felt overwhelmed by sadness whenever I was supposed to feel anger... so I can't tell very well what makes me angry because I first have to realize that I'm feeling anger or more like should be feeling it....
<u>91. Do you like your own name?</u>
Not really, no, but I guess I finally figured out some reasons why.. I've recently started going by a bit of a different name too but only my closest friends know so far and I'm not sure if I'll be using it irl at all..
<u>96. How did you get your name?</u>
I'm still trying to get my mother to admit that she named me after this song but she keeps denying it.. she's a fan of this band so it would have fit.. but she keeps saying she just liked the name, no long thought process behind it..
my chosen name is a bit of a different story. an ex friend I got to know through yt gave me that nickname almost 10 years ago after I complained that you can't make a shorter nickname out of my birthname and it's also the name of s character I like, especially his voice, and... idk it just feels more gender neutral and I simply feel comfortable with it. it just fit.
<u>100. Color of your room?</u>
same as question 5: Purple 🥰 or... well half the walls are purple, the other half is white
phew... can't believe I made it through all of these....
in case people haven't noticed yet, I'm currently kinda getting back into tumblr? I think I've already stayed a lot longer than any times I tried getting back before. it mostly started because we've got super bad wifi at the clinc I'm at rn and reddit takes up waaayy too much mobile data and... idk, I guess I just missed the vibe of tumblr
I'm not sure how long I'll be able to stick around but we'll see
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noahhernandez · 4 years
Text
2/9/2015 v. 8/11/2020
1:Talk about the first time you watched your favorite movie. My favorite movie is Scream, and it started when I saw the midnight premier of Scream 4 with my dad back when I was in 8th grade, then Scream 1 came on AMC late on night and I just really like it
I still think Scream is one of my favorites, but Halloween has jumped up there just because I am obsessed with all things horror really lol. I started to love Halloween because of the new trilogy.
2:Talk about your first kiss. It’s really not that interesting but really like embarrassing. It was with my first boyfriend and I had just turned 15 and we were at the school just walking around and we went into the band hall and I was like ok im leaving and he was like wait and we kissed and i was like o
the same ! 
3:Talk about the person you’ve had the most intense romantic feelings for. I never really have had intense feelings for anyone. I d k
One my exes- I mean we were dating for awhile so that’s pretty intense to me. 
4:Talk about the thing you regret most so far. I regret… Nothing really I mean, I have done really bad things in my life, but i don’t regret them
I regret failing like 2 semesters of college lmao and almost dropping out. If i didn’t then I would 1- would have been done earlier and 2- would have already completed a year of grad school but IDK also another is wasting lots of money in 2017-2018
5:Talk about the best birthday you’ve had. The best birthday I’ve had was.. Idk This year was was nice I saw Iggy Azalea in concert, then I celebrated my friends’ birthday then mine and it was just everyone got to get together so ya this year my 18th
For my 21st birthday I went to Portland, Oregon and spent the weekend there and it was pretty and my first time there so it was nice despite what I think about PDX now. I don’t even know what I was doing for my 19 and 20th birthday lol. 
6:Talk about the worst birthday you’ve had. My 17th birthday because I was stuck 2 hours away from home with a bunch of nerds doing a band competition 
That is still probably my worst birthday. I forget to mention that I was gone literally from like 7am to midnight. They werent a bunch of loser nerds, they were my friends, but I still wish I was just at home lol. 
7:Talk about your biggest insecurity. I am skinny, but not fit. If I eat anything I get this like stomach and it makes me so sad. and ever since I got a job I work odd hours and I eat a lot of fast food and I’ve gained 10 pounds in 2 years and I guess i’m insecure about my weight
I am still insecure about my weight, and I probably weight like 5 pounds more than I did when I made this post 5 1/2 years ago. 
8:Talk about the thing you are most proud of. We have band banquets for band, and I only went my sophomore and junior year, and seniors give out awards to underclassmen that are just jokes really, and both years 4 different seniors gave me an award for being the biggest gossip in the entire band and I was proud of that lol
Well since then I have graduated both high school and college. I am proud that I finished college !! A BS in Psych. Proud of myself that I got promoted (in 2017) at my job; i’m proud of myself that I have my own apartment, and blah blah basically just doing regular adult shit. 
9:Talk about little things on your body that you like the most. I like my nose because of how perfectly fixed it is. I also really like my freckles/moles/dark marks idk what they are exactly, but they’re on my face and they look great
I still feel the same way about this, maybe add my eyebrows- they’re not like clean and nice they’re just expression markers on my face that i love.
10:Talk about the biggest fight you’ve ever had. I got into a fight with my old friend Angelica and that was almost 4 months ago and we used to be best friends and now we never talk.
When Janett didn’t talk to me all summer of 2019 because I told our other friend Angel something
11:Talk about the best dream you’ve ever had. I cant remember one 12:Talk about the worst dream you’ve ever had. I can’t remember one
13:Talk about the first time you had sex/how you imagine your first time. The closest thing i’ve had to like sex was being locked in a back of an SUV with a stranger drunk as fuck and naked and its embarrassing
Just awkward and nothing to which I expected. 
14:Talk about a vacation. When I was 16, the high school band took a trip to Hawaii, and all my friends were in band so it was great. We did a lot of things, we toured Pearl Harbor and even played a few patriotic songs on the USS Miss. and our hotel was on Wakiki beach. I went snorkeling in some beautiful water and shit and idk just walked all around Hawaii having a great time omg we got on stage at the Hard Rock Cafe and sang with German people i miss it
Hm that was fun. But I.. went to NY with my ex and that was pretty cool because I literally love New York, and I went to NOLA two years ago (today actually) and got miserably drunk so that was fun too 
15:Talk about the time you were most content in life. Probably just in the middle of junior year when everything and everyone was going with the flow
I feel like 2016 was a very content year because I remember nothing about it. 
16:Talk about the best party you’ve ever been to. Idk which one to talk about the one where I had a lot of fun and risked my life or the one where there was a lot of drama stirred up and drank myself to sadness. 
I haven’t really been to a party? I have gone out and had good times. Really anytime my friends and I go out I am having a good time 
17:Talk about someone you want to be friends with. I am already friends with people I want to be friends with
18:Talk about something that happened in elementary school. I kissed a boy on the back of the head and i told I just fell onto his head
Let me think of another one. Back in like fourth grade my friend was in a wheel chair and his backpack was falling from the back and I was trying to grab it and i was only 3 feet tall i couldnt see over or wasnt paying attention and i crashed him right into the bookshelves at the library. 
19:Talk about something that happened in middle school. A girl was mad at me because idk why lol and she pushed me in the hall way and I fucking flew across that hall on the floor and hit the wall she’s pregnant now
When I was in 5th grade (which is considered middle school in my district) I was standing on the play ground and someone threw a stick at my head and it knocked me the fuck out and I was bleeding from my temple.
20:Talk about something that happened in high school. In Jr. Year I was pulling into the parking lot but I was texting and I accidentally put half my car on grass area near the side walk luckily it was 7am and only one person saw me do it lol
One summer going into our senior year we had a party at Michelle’s house. First of all we were very drunk and Coby’s parents were like we are coming over and we cleaned TF UP so fast and sat on the couch and turned on I Know What You Did Last Summer and his parents were like interesting and and left and then we continued to drink anyways- we started playing truth or dare and my friend Angelica was like I dare u to kiss Anthony (someone I had liked prior) and he wouldnt and we started attacking him and calling him homophobic and hitting him with pillows lmao- him and I are still friend-ish
21:Talk about a time you had to turn someone down. I can’t think of something right now.
Literally anyone on grindr.
22:Talk about your worst fear. I’m afraid of having no career and being stuck doing something I hate and living paycheck to paycheck
Yeah, I’m scared of that still but I.. think just like being broke and jobless. RN with the pandemic we aren’t really working and still getting gov’t assistance, so.  IDK being a real real adult scares me a lot. 
23:Talk about a time someone turned you down. I can’t think of a time :)
One time in like 2016 maybe idk - this dude told me to come over and he lived far like not that far maybe 25 minutes lol far for me anyways I got to his apartment and there was a gate code and i asked him what it was and he didnt answer and it was like 2-3am and nobody was coming in or out and so i was like damn this sucks lmao
24:Talk about something someone told you that meant a lot. Nothing really has meant a lot to me. Everyone tells me the same thing over and over again and its so surface level
I still can’t think of anything but I’m sure the friends I have met since this and my friends Faith, Michelle, Peter, and Alisa have said something supportive that meant a lot to me. 
25:Talk about an ex-best friend. Angelica Ramirez. She was my best friend for only 3 years, but together we went through A LOT of shit. We started out senior year just fine, but she lied about a few things and made a lot of us feel like crap in October. I won’t lie, I do miss her. We have too many memories to just forget, too many funny stories and great adventures. She helped me with too much, and sometimes I think about how I cut her out of my life and I mad a bad choice. But only time can heal things and I have moved on and truly found people that won’t make me mad every 30 seconds. 
Brianna Pajak, I don’t remember anything about her except she was poor and we stopped being friends because she always wanted to fight and be annoying. 
26:Talk about things you do when you’re sick. Lay on bed on my computer and watch TV
I normally just suffer and cry about wishing I was healthy again.
27:Talk about your favorite part of someone else’s body. Their…!!>>>??? 
I must have nice hands and ur nose must be nice too! so nose and hands. lol
28:Talk about your fetishes. none
yeah I don’t have any lol not that I can think of. 
29:Talk about what turns you on. Idk i really like kissing and touching and this is awkward. 
30:Talk about what turns you off. bad breath by
that and ugly/rough hands, acne sorry i know it is natural but, shorter than me lol, white people, long hair on guys, and thats about it i think hm i am single yes 
31:Talk about what you think death is like. I think its like idk its scary tho
um idk i dont like thinking about death because i literally want to cry when i think about it. 
32:Talk about a place you remember from your childhood. I remember being in trees a lot
My step grandma’s a lot because my parents were working and she would watch us. She passed away about a month ago :( 
33:Talk about what you do when you are sad. I usually only tell one person and that person is Alisa and I cry sometimes to her and expect her to make things better and she does thank u
I be doing the same thing, I text someone and that person could really be anyone but it happened the other day and I texted Bri and she was very helpful. 
34:Talk about the worst physical pain you’ve endured. I have no idea, I’ve never broken pulled strained twisted fractures or anything i have no life
I still haven’t done any of that stuff to my body. I also have burn scars but I did not feel those when it was happening. I would just say i guess my wisdom teeth coming in because I did not get them removed. I have 3 out lol.
35:Talk about things you wish you could stop doing. Pushing potential love interests away 
I have had some ‘love interests’ since this post, but it’s been about a year now since and I kind of push away the opportunity of getting close to someone. I also need to stop being a bitch sometimes. 
36:Talk about your guilty pleasures. eating 
I would say idk eating was a stupid answer. 
37:Talk about someone you thought you were in love with. never
I was in love and i didn’t ‘think’ I was in love. I don’t know what you mean by talk about them, they were my partner but we broke up hehe.
38:Talk about songs that remind you of certain people. Fireflies by Owl City reminds me of my 7th grade crush Fancy by Iggy Azalea reminds me of my two friends Michelle and Alisa idk anything else
um Idk. i rly cant think  39:Talk about things you wish you’d known earlier. I wish I would have known that
That it’s okay to tell people you’re struggling lol . That is okay to fail sometimes (school).  40:Talk about the end of something in your life. everything is just about to start
When I ended how to get away with murder I wish I never did I love that show with all my heart. 
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splendidshinobi · 3 years
Text
FULLMETAL ALCHEMIST 2003 LIVE REACT: EPISODES 21-25
almost halfway done lads how we feelin'
episode 21: the red glow
ah yes barry
"i'm alphonse elric!!!!!" yes u r baby!!!
who just popped over the wall
scar im assuming
"i kill therefore i am".....barry spouting descartes rn
it was scar haha
um
hi greed
thought i saw you earlier
WHY DID THEY DRAW HIS ARMS THAT LONG
ope he found the chimera crew...
jerry jewell's evil laugh gets me every time lmao he's so great
ed has deep philosophical talks bro
also ed is chaotic but his personal morals are unshakeable
who are these prison guards gonna release
oh hey kimblee
oh hey squad
ed take out ur pokeball
um wth is that
OH MY GOD TUCKER WHAT
EW
I THOUGHT IT WAS A GIANT YODA OR A SWAMP MONSTER
he looks FUCKKEDDDD
bro of all the things i was not expecting him
oof ishval flashbacks
young scar why is your hair brown
why is it white now
WHY IS HE NAKED
whos her
lust 1.0 im assuming
ew omg tucker is literally so fuckin nasty lookin idk
idk why but he's worse than rod reiss titan for me
wait a damn minute
wait a damn fucking minute
goddamnit
what is GOIN ON
i need tucker to stop whispering he sounds like fucking voldemort on the back of quirrells head
jesus
episode 22: created human
hughes' pajamas look like armin's futon from aot junior high
the bad place???? was that greed's prison gluttony was lookin at?
im still shook af over tucker and tbh its been like 24 hours since i watched episode 21
STOP WHISPERING TUCKER
driving me up a wall
my poor son looks so tired :(
those moral principles at it again
bradley.......
ewww the way tucker walks STOP
hi envy!!!!!
so all of those prisoner guys gonna get flattened by some alchemy
hey kimblee!!!
so did greed escape with the homies???? cause i feel like he would have made his presence known already....
i feel like im missing a lot because im a ding dong
musty prison kimblee is kinda...hot....physically speaking..oops..personality wise obviously there's MUCH to work on
so envy knows hohenheim
ED BABY
he won't do it
oh no alphonse
oh god memory implants
al's identity crisis CONTINUES
they wanna become humans??? huh....doesnt really make sense for their characters...(maybe envy but more on that at 11)
is ed gonna kill these guys for al
some1!!!!!! hold!!!!! me!!!! im so stressed
is he pretending to do it and he's got another plan up his sleeve!!!!????
honestly he's so depressed i cant even tell
those unshakable moral principles at work again i see
the red water can turn ed into a god???? wtf ed doesnt want to be a god he wants to punch god
oh theres the greed squad! i found them!!! is kimblee joining up with them
maria girly!!!!!!!
THE HOMUNCULI IN THEIR STUPID UNIFORMS I--
who's the lady. i need 2 know.
episode 23: fullmetal heart
alphonse is destroyed again
poor kid
"edward sir" brosh pls!!!
oh excuse me--- ***Bloch
The Ross Slap™
winry <3
pinako takes no prisoners
ed didnt you JUST tell brosh and ross they might be right that you needed to trust adults with more shit and now youre blowing off hughes
ed's DRAWINGS im-
hi sig hi izumi!!!
al is so sad over there in that corner
poor baby son
sometimes i feel like hughes and mustang are ed and al's divorced dads
the little arakawa avatar cows in the back im CRYING!!!!!!!
“bean”
snappy al
ooffffffff
omg hughes plz
elicia is precious though we love her
"dad's friend the bookworm" omg sheska
awwww gracia made edward a cake!!!!!!!
god catch me cryin in the club
CONGRATULATIONS
"whatever" al im crying he's so sad
AL MADE BROSH OR WHOEVER CARRY HIS DESTROYED ARMOR TO THE ROOF IM ACTUALLY YELLING
"you goof"
yes winry you are correct boy is a goof
sir you are being so dramatic
give that baby a hug
"so called brother"
so we all know that was a knife through the heart for ed
al just jumped off a FUCKING ROOF and ED TRIED TO FOLLOW
so im crying
i liked this better when they HAD A CONVERSATION ABOUT AL'S FEARS AND MADE THE FUCK UP
episode 24: bonding memories
guess we're gonna play w my emotions again
sometimes like....one bit characters talk...like villager b ya know? and im like who are you i know that voice
so the nasty military has come to ruin some lives again
and barry for some reason
aww poor al
youre real you are!!!!!!
i just feel like people would know people that wear sunglasses in the rain would be ishvalan
but what do i know
obviously they dont have the white hair thing in this version
poor ed is so sad
these boys need a hug 
let me just *pulls out adoption papers*
well if scar doesnt have queen mei to adopt in 03, he’s got this little toothless boy
dont lie al you do care
ew i dont like her
the drama of this boy
so the nasty military has come to ruin some lives again part 2
apparently they are *mercenaries??? excuse me
i have some questions regarding this kid’s mom
well you know i can see why this kid feels this way about his mom
it does look like she ran off...
al and scar dream team up
HEY ED!!! HEY WINRY!!!
bout time
yall gonna have this talk now????
barry STOPPPPPP
brotherhood barry is the true king there i said it
damn scar you baddie
barry like....you already knew him
anyway
WHAT THE HELL
NO RICKKK!!!!!!
someone save this boy!!!!
oh good his mom “saved” him
ah damn thats pretty tragic
she didnt know they were right in front of her
ow
well my questions were answered
so she attacks with grape fanta. thats one way to do it
ed looks like such an angry gremlin right now this is a heartwarming moment sir please
why are ed and scar being so civil right now this is so weird
bye scar
we’ll see him again
see you later scar
episode 25: words of farewell
maes who let you buy that awful pink suit 
gracia please it better not have been you
mustang ew please
dont open the door lookin like that
what the hell are you doing in here 
so hughes WASNT in ishval here?
i think that takes a lot away from his character but anyway
bradley hangs around like a creep at every possible instant
why would bradley care about ishvalan refugees like hughes cmon
“unspeakable crimes” BRADLEY YOU LITERALLY CANNOT TALK
juliet douglas is this lady’s name
only took me 1000 episodes to figure that out
ED AND AL??? NOT DEALING WITH DANGEROUS THINGS??????? dont make me laugh assholes theyre lying thru their teeth
izumi time lets go
wow we’re still going to rush valley? wasnt really expecting that tbh
elicia i LOVE you!!!!!
ew kimblee “hi”
how did he lightning himself like that
if i were ishvalan i would not go to the south....yet ANOTHER war torn region of amestris but ok
okay
an amestrian desert biker gang rolled up to wreak havoc
HUGHES AHAHAHA 
tbh i wouldnt want to tell roy anything either stupid bitch
anyway
um why do i feel like its hughes’ death episode
he would not be shown tucking elicia in to bed otherwise 
please im not ready to be hurt again
oh no
yeah he just learned something about our girl juliet
ive been waiting for this information 
he’s gonna die before we learn anything helpful
yupppppp
hey lust figured you’d show up sooner or later
i too wish i could look that sexy pulling a kunai out of my forehead
SLOTH????????
did girly just say SLOTH
i- nothing about her seems particularly slothy but ok
u know what!!!!!!!!!!!!
ENVY HEYYY
DUMBASS ROY JUST HAAAAAD TO LEAVE
haha famous last words
oof it hurts every time
not the FUNERAL scene no!
time for me to go 
peace out homies im dead inside
yes my brigadier general 
NOT THE RAIN
COME ONNNNNN
hughes is sneezing six feet under
was ed supposed to be looking at hughes’ ghost
um....right
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theycallmegothboy · 3 years
Note
1-100 >:DDDD REVENGE!!!
FELIXXXXXXXXXXXX >:(( 1. Spotify, SoundCloud, or Pandora?  -spotify  2. is your room messy or clean? -it’s pretty messy i guess  3. what color are your eyes? -blue and grey
4. do you like your name? why? -yeah it’s fine 5. what is your relationship status? -single 6. describe your personality in 3 words or less -certified intrusive thot 7. what color hair do you have? -brown and rn it’s red 8. what kind of car do you drive? color? -i dont have a car 9. where do you shop? -hot topic, goodwill, target 10. how would you describe your style? -comfy emo 11. favorite social media account -of mine, probably discord or youtube 12. what size bed do you have? -twin >:(( 13. any siblings? -i have 1.5 brothers  14. if you can live anywhere in the world where would it be? why? -probably vancouver, idk canada seems lit 15. favorite snapchat filter? -i like the one with devil horns and a tail but its cute 16. favorite makeup brand(s) -i dont wear makeup 17. how many times a week do you shower? -i used to shower every day, but i dont do anything that gets me dirty so like maybe 3 times but if i leave the house then i shower 18. favorite tv show? -stranger things 19. shoe size?  -8 or 9 20. how tall are you? -5′6 with shoes >:(( 21. sandals or sneakers? -sneakers wtf 22. do you go to the gym? -lol no 23. describe your dream date -making some pie or something together and then eating the pie and then sitting on some rooftop looking at stars 24. how much money do you have in your wallet at the moment? -quite a bit actually but i’m saving up for a phone lol so soon it will be like maybe 10 dollars lmao 25. what color socks are you wearing? -not wearing socks but the ones i had earlier were white (ankle length) 26. how many pillows do you sleep with? -just one but it sucks 27. do you have a job? what do you do? -NO BUT IM TRYING TO GET A JOB BUT THE FUCKIN PEOPLE THERE ARE GHOSTING ME AND WONT REPLY TO MY EMAILS SO LIKE SBJHBJS 28. how many friends do you have? -like 4 lmao 29. whats the worst thing you have ever done? -idk nothing super bad but i do a lot of small shit that makes me feel guilty when i realize what i did 30. whats your favorite candle scent? -juniper rosewood 31. 3 favorite boy names -leo, clay, charlie 32. 3 favorite girl names -ivy, uh... idk thats all ive got 33. favorite actor? -no clue 34. favorite actress? -no clue 35. who is your celebrity crush? -not a celeb but i’d smash danny phantom 36. favorite movie? -nightmare before christmas or edward scissorhands 37. do you read a lot? whats your favorite book? -no, but my fav book is probably the prince and the pauper? idk 38. money or brains? -CASH MONEYYYY jk probably brains but if your entire personality is being “smart” like fuck off lmao   39. do you have a nickname? what is it? - a bunch of people call me son (see #49, #100), some call me rat, dumdum, goth boy
40.how many times have you been to the hospital? -just once i think when i was birthed. i also went once with my brother cause he kicked some scissors i left out on the floor and it sliced his toe the fuck open and he needed stitches and i watched him get the stitches and almost passed out :/ 41. top 10 favorite songs -please dont make me do this i dont have it in me 42. do you take any medications daily? -yea i take 20mg of vyvanse but i need to get it raised to 30 cause 20 is Not Enough 43. what is your skin type? (oily, dry, etc) -i got some dry fuckin skin yall dont even know 44. what is your biggest fear?  -it depends. the dark is a pretty constant one though 45. how many kids do you want? -like 2 or 3 eventually 46. whats your go to hair style? -in my face, looking stupid 47. what type of house do you live in? (big, small, etc)  -it’s pretty small 48. who is your role model? -i dont fuckin know lmao  49. what was the last compliment you received? - “i belive in you, my son, you’re an amazing human being“ (same friend mentioned in #100, not actually a parent of mine) 50. what was the last text you sent? -”no it’s a raccoon“ YOU GET NO CONTEXT LMAO 51. how old were you when you found out santa wasn’t real? -i dont think i ever hardcore believed in him, maybe i did though i remember sleeping under the tree one christmas eve waiting for him but i was like “oh yeah that makes sense“ i guess 52. what is your dream car?  -i honestly dont give a shit as long as it actually fucking works 53. opinion on smoking? -cigarettes? fuck no that’s nastyyy. weed? that’s fine i guess but wait till you’re like 18.  54. do you go to college? -no. am sophomore n highschool 55. what is your dream job?  -musician/palentologist 56. would you rather live in rural areas or the suburbs?  -fuck the suburbs lmao, but also im tired of rural, so like.. semi urban?? 57. do you take shampoo and conditioner bottles from hotels?  -no but i take the little soaps >:)) 58. do you have freckles?  -yes 59. do you smile for pictures? -awkwardly, yes 60. how many pictures do you have on your phone?  -dont have a phone but i have like 12 on my computer currently. 4 are of me, the rest are of my cat or random shit 61. have you ever peed in the woods?  -yes 62. do you still watch cartoons?  -cartoons these days kinda suck but like if they were good fuck yeah i would like gravity falls can come hang yknow? 63. do you prefer chicken nuggets from Wendy’s or McDonalds? -i had nuggets from mcdonalds today so i guess them? i dont really care 64. Favorite dipping sauce?  -i got sweet and sour but i dont like it that much. that schezuan sauce was great 65. what do you wear to bed?  -wouldnt you like to know? ;))  66. have you ever won a spelling bee?  -NO ive only been in two. the first one i misspelled the word “turmoil“ cause i had never heard it before and the second one i spelled the word “owed“ as “ode“ cause i was thinking like ode to joy and then i felt like a big Fool afterwards :(( 67. what are your hobbies? -lol what hobbies 68. can you draw?  -i am physically able to draw, but not well, no 69 (haha). do you play an instrument? -yeah i play a few 70. what was the last concert you saw?  -i saw Chicago in either georgia or tennessee i cant remember in like 2016 71. tea or coffee? -hot coffee, iced tea. NOT the other way around. (i love both though) 72. Starbucks or Dunkin Donuts? -starbucks 73. do you want to get married? -sure why not 74. what is your crush’s first and last initial? -dont have a crush 75. are you going to change your last name when you get married?  -idk maybe 76. what color looks best on you?  -i dont know but i wear black a lot and that’s pretty dope 77. do you miss anyone right now? -yeah  78. do you sleep with your door open or closed? -closed 79. do you believe in ghosts? -on the fence. not 100% “oh my god look at these gHoSt oRbS i need to sage my house!!!“ but i accept that there’s some things i wont understand about the world and that i have no answers to. i wouldnt be surprised if there are, and i wouldnt be surprised if there aren’t. 80. what is your biggest pet peeve? -whatever my adhd decides i viscerally hate with a firey passion right at that moment  81. last person you called -my brother (the 1 of the 1.5 from #13 and the one who sliced his toe in #40) 82. favorite ice cream flavor?  -chocolate is dope 83. regular oreos or golden oreos?  -regular double stuff. if you say golden, mint, peppermint, or thin oreos i’m gonna have to euthanize you, i dont make the rules.  84. chocolate or rainbow sprinkles? -rainbow cause it’s prettier  85. what shirt are you wearing?  -queen shirt from hot topic 86. what is your phone background? -i didnt get a phone between question 60 and now but my computer one is some mountains with the moon in the background 87. are you outgoing or shy? -really depends on who i’m around 88. do you like it when people play with your hair? -YES FUCK AAAAAAA (this girl played with my hair literally once in middle school and i was like oh shit and i had a crush on her until the end of middle school true story,,, so ashley if you’re out there-) 89. do you like your neighbors? -to the left they’re fine and their dog is nice but idk what happened to the horses so that’s sus but that’s where our cat came from so they can hang  guess, behind me they’re fine but their boys are loud, to the right they’re fine, and even further to the right are the dope neighbors and waaaaaaaaaay far to the right is a llama and he’s dope as hell 90. do you wash your face? at night? in the morning? -whenever the fuck i remember to/have the energy 91. have you ever been high?  -i dont think so but i wouldnt put it past myself 92. have you ever been drunk?  -not that i can remember, no 93. last thing you ate?  -sloppy joe from a can 94. favorite lyrics right now -”not gonna waste my life, cause i’ve been fucked up“ 95. summer or winter?  -fall. fuck you 96. day or night?  -night but i like it when it’s actually night and it doesnt get dark at like 4 fucking pm cause that makes me depressed 97. dark, milk, or white chocolate? -dark is good, milk is fine, white is only suitable for fancy stripes on chocolate covered strawberries 98. favorite month?  -i vibe with september 99. what is your zodiac sign -sagittarius (was almost a scorpio but i was holding out >:))) 100. who was the last person you cried in front of?  -in person, my mom like 6 months ago, on a discord call, my friend (i love you by the way, you’re the best,,, i dont think he has tumblr but im just putting it out there) like a month or so ago. i hate crying in front of people, i turn into such a hyperventilating snot monster which is not suitable for human gaze and thats the real tea :/
felix this took like 2 hours of my life i will never get back i hate you and i hope you’re happy with what you’ve done <3 <3
also anyone who wants to stalk me, enjoy this information that im handing to you on a silver platter :)) <3
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maerveil · 4 years
Text
50 Questions You Have Never Been Asked
i was tagged by @loverofelves​ :3c thank u <3
1. What is the color of your hairbrush?
black, nothing special, my mom got it from a dollar store for me bc my old one was literally falling apart but i refused to replace it
2. A food you never eat?
the only thing i can think of that i would probably not eat even if that meant it gets thrown away is steak, or any cut of red meat. i have a lot of trouble swallowing it for some reason. most other foods i hate i would still rather eat than waste them
3. Are you typically too warm or too cold?
theres no really comfortable temperature for me i think. im always either too warm or too cold. but since i spend most time in my bedroom which only gets sunlight for about 4 hours a day, im usually too cold
4. What were you doing 45 minutes ago?
painting with watercolours and listening to music
5. What is your favorite candy bar?
i avoid sweets so i dont really know the different breeds of candy bar
6. Have you ever been to a professional sporting event?
ive participated in a few swimming tournaments when i was younger and a friend dragged me to see an ice hockey match a few years ago
7. What was the last thing you said out loud?
'hey’ at my cats because they were climbing my shelf....
8. What is your favorite ice cream?
not really a flavour, but strawberry sundae, with real strawberries and white chocolate... theres nothing quite like it
9. What was the last thing you had to drink?
tap water
10. Do you like your wallet?
its a huge black leather wallet. i wanted one like this really bad when i was like 14 yrs old, now i kinda think its too big. but i like that it has space for all kinds of clutter like cards and pictures... i want to say i feel neutral about it but considering how long ive had it im probably at least a little attached
11. What was the last thing you ate?
a small bowl of plain oats with milk for breakfast
12. Did you buy any new clothes last weekend?
no... im saving my money for useless things rn!
13. The last sporting event you watched?
im really not into sports so whenever i watch sports it i dont do so deliberately. uhm. i think biathlon was on tv one time a few months ago when i visited my dad
14. What is your favorite flavor of popcorn?
i like it when its sweet but not so much that your fingers get terribly sticky from it
15. Who was the last person you sent a text message to?
my dad probably
16. Ever go camping?
yea i went camping w my dad a lot when i was younger, almost every summer for 8 years. im mentioning my dad a lot here. we are not as close as one might think
17. Do you take vitamins?
no
18. Do you go to church every Sunday?
no im too pretty
19. Do you have a tan?
no, but my right arm is a bit red from sitting on my balcony too long yesterday
20. Do you prefer Chinese food or pizza?
depends entirely on my mood, i dont have a general preference
21. Do you drink your soda with a straw?
only when i want to act like a slut which is never
22. What color socks do you usually wear?
i usually wear black tights
23. Ever drive above the speed limit?
I CANT DRIVE AND I NEVER WILL and if you drive above the speed limit thats +5 on your sin counter. i will know
24. What terrifies you?
those scary creepypasta images, communication, and anything unpredictable. also the possibility that jjba part 7 will be animated entirely in cgi
25. Look to your left what do you see?
a manga panel of dio i traced and taped to my wall, a bunch of jjba prints, and a tiny sticker of diego
26. What core do you hate?
if this is about music... i actually dont even want to spell out the name of that genre, thats how disgusting it is. its got to do with anime
27. What do you think of when you hear an Australian accent?
that time in like, 7th grade, where english class was mostly about learning australian vocabulary
28. What is your favorite soda?
i dont drink soda im so scared of the liquid sugar but like cherry or vanilla coke probably
29. Do you go into a fast food place or just hit the drive through?
i dont ever go to fast food places, but if i did id hit the drive thru. inside its too loud and i hate when people can watch me eat
30. Who was the last person you talked to?
in person... my dad i think
31. Favorite cut of beef?
its all bad
32. Last song you listened to?
all the fools sailed away by dio (the band with real life people in it)
33. Last book you read?
der unsichtbare apfel by robert gwisdek. im still reading it actually im just too busy to finish anything rn
34. Favorite day of the week?
saturday of course!! although last night there was someone in front of my window at 3am who screamed for two seconds for seemingly no reason. this stuff doesnt happen on weekdays
35. Can you say the alphabet backwards?
no and im self conscious about it
36. How do you like your coffee?
black!!
37. Favorite pair of shoes?
my dr martens mary janes... easy to get in and out of... simple... cute... whats not to love. theyre starting to fall apart tho bc i wear them all the time
38. At what time do you usually go to bed?
between 9 and 11 pm
39. At what time do you normally get up?
between 5 and 9 am
40. What do you prefer - sunrises or sunsets?
emotionally, sunrises bc sunsets remind me that the day is over and my time has run out... but aesthetically, sunsets
41. How many blankets are on your bed?
two, one weighted and one normal
42. Describe your kitchen plates?
plain white... super boring and i hate them but i used to live with a minimalist and tried to be considerate to avoid conflict
43. Do you have a favorite alcoholic beverage?
rum w cola or pina coladas, but i usually avoid alcohol. makes me feel like a soggy sponge and so sleepy. hate it
44. Do you play cards?
no all card games are bad!!
45. What color is your car?
i cant drive
46. Can you change a tire?
i cant even consider learning how to do it
47. What is your favorite province?
*nods*
48. Favorite job you ever had?
i hate jobs and careers and i would sooner let myself get exploded into a thousand pieces by impact with a speeding train than take up a job again
49. How did you get your biggest scar?
i was 15, in a really bad place mentally, and tried to make a point to someone... uh oh!
50. What did you do today that made someone happy?
this question is guilt tripping me
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Text
Survey #259
"i went straight to heaven, but i kept on knockin’.”
What's something that makes you feel more creative? Music. What are the last three nail polish colors you wore? Wow, idk the last time I wore nail polish, but probably black or maroon. What's the last thing you binge watched? Avatar: The Last Airbender w/ Sara. Do you watch youtube videos or tv shows more? YouTube is essentially my TV. Quite literally - I don't have a television in my room because I never watch it. What's a DIY project that you don't think actually works? Oh dude, plenty. I have DIY-obsessed friends online as well as a Pinterest, I know this shit, lmao. I can name one though with total certainty because I was with a friend when she tried that disgusting "YOU CAN MAKE cuPCAkES IN A C uP!!!!!" crap. It's the most eggy shit you'll ever try. Do you collect Mason jars to use for crafts? No, but I think those crafts are generally super cute. Have you ever gotten rid of something and then regretted it? If so, what? (or what's one thing?) Oh yeah, one of my biggest being my senior prom pictures, but not for the reason you'd expect (save for two pictures of us that're just REALLY fuckin cute): I want them back because goddamn I was pretty ok and I miss that now that I hate my body every waking moment of every day. :^) What color is the zip-up hoodie you wear the most? Don't have one w/ a zipper, they're ugly. Do you live in an apartment that has inspections? No. Do you hate taking naps during the day? Nooo I love naps and usually take one a day. I tend to feel really tired all over again a few hours or so after I wake up. Who in your immediate family has the best natural hair? MEEEEEEEEEEEE. Would you ever audition for American Idol? Hell no. Do you know anyone who thinks they're more talented than they are? Lol wow, this is mean. I don't think so. Do you buy gum? Rarely, even though I like it. What's your favorite dollar store?  I don’t have a favorite, I'd say? But I think we normally go to Dollar General. How many cell phones have you had in your lifetime? Maybe like, six? Have you ever been inside a Victorian mansion? BITCH I WISH!!!!!!!!!!!! I would kill to get married in one, omfGGGGGGGGGGG. What was the most boring field trip you ever want on? I don't remember a bad one. I loved going on field trips. The last time you went, what were your favorite rides at Cedar Point? I’ve never been. Which country would you most like to visit? Eeeeek idk, but probably South Africa. What are your favorite types of videos to watch on YouTube? What I watch on YouTube has become pretty diverse, but I know my favorites are easily Mark's actual big projects w/ egos 'n shit alksjdflk;w gOOD SHIT MY FRIENDS. I still love let's plays, of course! Are you a hoarder? No. Is there a guy (or girl) that you wish things had worked out with? Yes. If you were to start a collection, what would it be? I'd loooove Shadow of the Colossus stuff, particularly the amazing figures they used to have only in Japan. And World of Warcraft stuff; all I have rn is an Illidan poster and a fae dragon plushy hanging from my ceiling that Jason got me. If you were rich, what things would you get done cosmetically? Mother of god, a lot. #1, make me skinny again for the love of fuck. Which would result in loose skin being taken off and probably a breast lift because being overweight ruined my comfort with them laskdjfw. Whiten my teeth and give me laser hair removal surgery on my legs, please. Are your parents too controlling? Not at all. Who is your favorite fictitious redhead? VOL'JIN Blizzard what the FUCK give him BACK What shows have you seen on Broadway? None. Who is the prettiest Asian YouTuber that you can think of? Bitch Mark is Korean and he's gorgeous as fuck goddamn it ain't fair. But this is a weird question. What is the best news you've heard lately? When my mom got a follow-up blood test, things looked good!! She especially needed to level out her sugar, which she did well on. She also didn't lose or gain any weight, so that's wonderful. Have you ever flown first class? Hunny I am v poor. Have you ever had food SO bad in a restaurant that you sent it back? I don't believe so, anyway. Do you talk in your sleep? Very regularly now. Have you ever locked yourself out of your house? OOF, yes. Are you the type of person who can shake insults off easily, or do they tend to stick around in your brain & bother you? They stick with me for a long, long time. At least two I remember from years upon years ago. Who was the last person you cut out of your life intentionally? My old therapist that I trusted and loved when I fucking shouldn't have. Where were you raised? By who? Eastern NC, by my parents. What were your first words? "Dada." What were some of your favorite things when you were young? DINOSAURS, Webkinz, Pokemon, and Spyro, to name a few. What did you grow up listening to? Mostly country and pop music. What games did you play in the past? Spyro was my obsession, and I also loved hunting games (ironic, as irl I would never even consider it???) as well as fishing ones, plus Crash Bandicoot. What was the best birthday party you ever had? I'm not sure. How about the best vacation? I'm unsure; I haven't really been on a lot. Do you have any secrets you never intend to tell? Yup. What memory would you like to disappear from your mind forever? A nightmare I had about my dad. If you were someone else, would you be friends with the person you are now? Yeah. Do you consider yourself a smart person? No. What friend in your life has been the greatest influence to you? I don't know. Where is the scariest place you’ve ever been? What made it so terrifying? I shared a bedroom with an EXTREMELY volatile, violent woman once in the mental hospital. As in she had to go in solitary when she had a violent episode, during which she became very destructive to her surroundings, so as you could guess, I was worried about my own wellbeing. She was eventually moved because I was that uncomfortable. Did you celebrate Easter? Are there any holidays you are more inclined to celebrate than others? If so, which? Well, Easter hasn't come yet, but we'll probably go to my sister's house for the kids. We'll celebrate Christmas and Thanksgiving without fail. We don't pay much attention to others. I'd LOVE to do something for Halloween, we just never have anywhere to go/anything to do. What was the last thing you deleted? Pictures. What colors make up the majority of your wardrobe? Is there any color you like, but don’t wear often? There's black there. Oh, there's s'more black. What's that???? More bLACK????? MAN, I wish I could pull off pink. When was the last time you were in any amount of pain? I had a pretty intense headache yesterday. Who was the last person to hug you? Do you hug this person often? My niece, and yeah, every time I visit. What are you most likely to argue or debate about? The fact I almost never leave my pajamas lmao. What was the last show you watched? Have you seen it before, or is it something you’re watching for the first time? A few days back, I was reeeaaally bored and actually watched TV deliberately, CAN YOU BELIEVE IT?????? It was The Witcher; wasn't bad. I'd be willing to watch more. How would you describe your taste in clothing? What would a dream outfit look like to you? uuuuuggggGHHHHHHHH let me be GOTH. Give me a corsette if they weren't notoriously uncomf with plenty of chains 'n stuff. BIG, SPIKY BOOTS. SKINNY LEATHER PANTS. UUUUGGGGGGGHHHHHH. Have you ever tried snowboarding? No. What’s your favorite planet besides Earth? Saturn is dope. Would you ever be a coach for any sport? Nope. What color of eyes do you have? Blue. Do you like tacos? NOOOOOOOOO. White or red wine? Wine is gross. Do you prefer foxes or wolves? Foxes. What’s the youngest you would consider dating? No younger than 21. Do you think suits are sexy? mmmmmmmmmMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM Did you go to high school with your current best friend? No. What is your boss’ (or school prinicpal’s) name? N/A Were you a fan of Michael Jackson before he died? I was never really a fan. Respected him immensely as a musician, I just didn't care much about his music. Turkey or ham for Thanksgiving? Ham. Turkey is always too dry and stringy. Do you look good in hats? I wouldn't know, I haven't worn one in forever. Never with short hair. Colons or equal signs for your smiley face's eyes? Colons. Do you like architecture? If so, do you have a favourite style or structure that you’d like to make note? Yes, and I should really have an answer for this, as architecture was a big part in Art History... Ummm Etruscan stands out, and of course Roman/Greek (even after the class I don't remember their differences well...). I love Middle Eastern architecture, too. What is one of your favorite words, in any language, and why? I just love the sound of "serendipity," as well as uhhhh "sakura" in Japanese and "kanji" in Chinese. I'm trying to think of a German one, as there certainly are some, but they're evading me right now. Where is the farthest you’ve travelled on foot? JESUS FUCK probably going to get Sara's brother from school, mother of all that is holy. But it might just feel like it because it was during the peak of my muscle atrophy in my legs. Are there any songs that you perhaps like but avoid because it makes you sad when heard? A good number. Do you like the area that you live in? What do you like or dislike about the area? NO. There's not shit to do and it's not aesthetically pleasing at all. Do you have a memory of when you really thought that you have lucked out on something? If so, what was it? Uhhhhh. A handful, I guess? Oh, uh, the suicide attempt to name one and probably the biggest. I took way too many of those pills to experience almost zero symptoms of an overdose; I did look up what "too many" was, because I wanted that. I'd say I was pretty fuckin lucky. If you have apps on your mobile phone, which one do you use the most? Facebook. Which do you like better: fantasy or science fiction novels? Why? FANTASY!!! I think it allows more creativity and possibilities of something magically "making sense" because yeah, it's fantasy. Science fiction has more "realness" to it, more, obviously, scientific elements versus make-believe. Do you like opossums? Do you think it is ethically right for others to keep opossums as pets? OPOSSUMS!!!!!!!!! ARE!!!!!!!!!! FANTASTIC!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! They're my second-favorite animals kdsja;lkdjaw. BUT ANYWAY, no, unless it's for rescue reasons. When was the last time someone asked you a huge favor or advice? Do you get asked often by this person? Oh I have no idea. Probably my mom? And no, definitely not. She hates asking for help. What are your thoughts on nihilism? I definitely get it, but it's not my personal outlook. Do you like the snow? More like love. What are your thoughts and feelings towards work/jobs in general? I don't know? I've never even had a real, steady job, so it's hard to really answer... I've only had bad experiences. It's kinda weird to me how you have to work your ass off (usually) to get a job you enjoy, as well as slave for some stupid green paper until the day you die just to stay alive and healthy. But at the same time, it offers a sense of fulfilment and is as well something productive and beneficial to the masses to do. Civilization would be very, very different and unadvanced if we were without them, so I guess it is a necessary thing. Humans gotta work together to keep where we're at. Do you believe in astrology? I've never actually elaborated why I don't believe in it so there ya go: not in the slightest. All it does is offer extremely broad characteristics that, in some light, almost anyone can relate to so they feel included in something. We naturally want to "belong" within something as social creatures, and astrology is an easy one with it being so vast. It gives equally indirect advice that can be applied to a multitude of situations, so people just mold what they read to fit their world. Don't base your goddamn life choices on the random positioning of shit in space. What is something that you’ve made/created? Do you take pride in your creations? Well, way way way too many OCs that I do indeed love a hell of a lot. If you have a Tumblr account, do you have any followers that you wish would not follow you? Well I'm sure there are bots. What kind of books do you generally enjoy to read? Fantasy stuff, mostly. But I also love novels with deep meaning, particularly about life in general. A good plot is mandatory. Does the quality of a video, on YouTube or a television, matter to you? I mean of course in some situations, like if I'm watching something educational/something to gain visual knowledge from. What is one situation that may cause you to become shy (if there is any)? Don't don't don't don't don't point out that my serious interests/things I massively love are "weird" like it's been years and I can still barely explain why my biggest tattoo is a tribute to some fuckface on the Internet lmao. When one is depressed, what can a friend do about it? Do you find that there is a good method to approach people in helping them combat depression? It is SO important to, first, ask them what they want. Do they want advice, an ear to just listen, just your presence, to be alone? As for combating depression, that greatly depends on the origin (if any) of theirs. There are so many factors in answering this question, but what I mentioned should, imo, always be the start. Do you tend to listen to music that embraces your mood or does music dictate your mood? Is it a little bit of both? Definitely both. When I'm sad though, I'm almost definitely listening to somber music too. Do you find yourself to be generally a forgiving person? I'm too goddamn forgiving. Do you have an embarrassing memory that you now look back at and can laugh? If so and if you’re comfortable, could you share one here? Omg I have a Bible-length collection of those suckers. I'd prefer not to. What is one skill that you have worked hard to develop? Is there still room for improvement on that skill? Damn, anxiety-coping mechanisms and actually trusting them to help me through attacks. I used to be convinced that they were useless because it just wouldn't work and weren't immediately effective, but you've gooooooot to trust the process, friends. What do you consider to be your main passion(s) and how did they come about? Spreading awareness of the seriousness of mental health and the comfort of knowing there's hope. You can never stop pushing. My own experience with mental health struggles is definitely the deeeep roots of that. Who do you think influenced you the most in your life so far? Why? Jason changed my life in many ways. Trauma does that. He taught me a lot about the necessity of having faith in yourself to survive on your own, a shitload about love and how it's not some fairy tale, and that people change, even those you least expect to. What is something that you have overheard people talk about that really bothered you? I could name more than a few things about race stuff, living where I do. What do you normally say or how do you normally act in response to a compliment? I usually do this shy laugh and say "thank you" with too much enthusiasm. How many books do you own? Do you have more physical books than electronic books? I've no clue where a lot of my old ones are. I have no electronic ones; I strongly prefer to read a physical book. What are your thoughts on higher education? Is it really necessary? In your opinion, what changes can be made? Depending on your aspiring career, it can be necessary, but just as easily, it can be unnecessary. I know for a fucking fact it should not be NEARLY as expensive as it is. Maybe even free, but I have no idea what monetary concerns that could cause with whoever runs the place. Have you ever received a heartfelt compliment from a stranger? Probably at some point. How many people would you consider to be extremely close to you? "Extremely"... like three lmao. Maybe one more or so. When was the last time you had to speak to a crowd? How well did that go? When I was taking pictures at a wedding last. It went okay. How would you describe your general outlook towards humanity? We by no means deserve to be the apex predator and Earth would be a shitload better without us. How long do you think you could last without any contact with your significant other, best friend, or a person whom you consider would be the closest to you? I'll use my mom here, in which case idk. I don't particularly want to find out. I talk to her at LEAST by text daily. Every day now that she can't work/is always home with me. Have you ever realised that someone was lying, but it was too late to confront them? Nope. Eventually speaking up is how I lost her, but.
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