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#He deserves to really know and idk. It makes me think of this moment.
wonnieluvr · 10 hours
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thinking of you
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pairing -> grayson hawthorne x fem!reader
summary -> grayson can’t get you off his mind even years after your messy breakup. do you still think about him too?
warnings -> angst again lol 😭 i tried to make it a happy ending but idk yet
a/n -> pt.2 to this fic but can be read as a standalone :) this one is long, woo 😮‍💨 i also dk if gray is a bit ooc, i tried..
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you had been grayson's first love. and sometimes, he believed you were the only one he had truly loved.
you were perfect. and you knew him so well. it had never been difficult with you.
he had never been as happy as he was with you. he hadn't even imagined a world where the two of you broke up.
and yet... you were standing there, across the room.
and you weren't his anymore. how could he have ever let you go?
he could feel his chest tightening, it was becoming harder to breath.
all he could think of was you, you were right there. could he really see you again? he knew in his heart that he still loved you, he could feel the painful twinge in his heart at the thought of you leaving again. leaving without even saying goodbye, without even trying to make this right.
"gray? what are you doing?" he barely registered jameson’s voice, his brother nudging his side to get him to focus. they were meant to be taking photos for the paparazzi and all grayson could do was stare at you.
jameson posed for him, wrapping his arm around grayson’s neck to pull his attention away long enough for a good photo. or at least, one that wouldn’t spark any rumours.
grayson’s scowl was a normal sight, normal enough to please the paparazzi.
“gray” jameson hissed as they moved away to a further less crowded area of the gala. “what the hell are you doing?”
“she’s here jamie..” grayson’s tone was airy, filled with unresolved emotion. he didn’t sound anything like himself. that immediately set off warnings in jameson’s mind.
“who’s here?” jameson was an inconspicuous as grayson had been, head wildly swinging around the room to find who his brother could possibly be talking about.
that seemed to snap enough sense back into grayson. “stop it” he snarled, pulling on jameson’s shoulder in an effort to stop him. “you look stupid, come on”
jameson finally turned back, frowning in offence. “rude. so you’re allowed to act weird and i’m not?” he huffed, subtly glancing around the room this time. “can you just tell me who we’re talking about now?”
“y/n”
jameson froze, eyes widening. “what?”
grayson didn’t reply for a moment, too busy looking for you again. he had almost given up, you probably weren't even here anymore.
had you seen him? had you left at the sight of him? he sucked in a sharp breath at that thought, trying to believe you wouldn't but he knew you would. you would turn and leave the minute you saw him.. it was his fault, after all.
jameson was staring at him, trying to decipher what he was thinking. "look, i don't think this is going to go well.." he begun, the look of disapproval an unusual one for the younger brother. "but, if you're going to talk to her, take it somewhere private"
grayson blankly stared at him back for a moment, struggling to believe that his brother was really encouraging this.
"what?" jameson raised an eyebrow at him. "we all knew how much she meant to you gray, you were never the same after she left" he shook his head, "i don't know if you, or we deserve a second chance but you should try"
"thank you.." grayson's shoulders dropped their stiff posture slightly, grateful for his family for once. not his mother, his aunt, his grandfather but his brothers.
"go on, i've got distraction" he didn't like the look of jameson's proud grin but he could care less what jamie was up to this time. he needed to see you.
he caught sight of your dress first, across the ballroom. he made an immediate dart line for you, weaving between people and looking over their heads to keep track of where you were. you were moving again when he finally reached out, fingers clasping around your wrist.
"y/n"
he could feel himself at a loss for words, his breath even leaving him when you turned. you looked as beautiful as you had back then. even more so, maybe.
you were confused but that quickly turned to a look he knew all too well, one that didn't suit you at all. the sadness, the melancholy, the pain.
"gray.. what are you doing?" your voice. oh, how he had missed hearing you say his name. your beautiful voice.
"y/n i-" he could feel his throat tightening. "i need to speak to you. please"
grayson hawthorne was not a man who said please. not to anyone. but you, he would plead on his knees until you came back to him. if you came back to him.
you looked unsure, but eventually you agreed, pulling him along casually as though you were just talking like anyone else. but you weren't anyone else. not to him.
he couldn't help the way his eyes stayed glued to your figure, taking in everything that had changed. you still managed to leave him breathless, even after all these years.
when you were out in one of the more secluded corridors you finally parted from him, dropping his hand and taking a step back. even the way your arms tightened around you waist broke his heart, you were protecting yourself. from him.
"what did you want to talk about?" you were trying to be assertive, short. you wanted this over with.
he winced slightly. "i'm sorry" he had never said that to you as desperately as he did now. he should have.. "i should have defended you, i should have stopped them, i should have- i should have done a lot of things. and i'm sorry, i'm so sorry, y/n. please, you have to understand-"
"i do understand, gray. but you never came after me" your voice was meek and full of emotion. you were trying not to cry. he had hurt you. badly. "you never called, you never texted, you never spoke to me again. what was i supposed to think then? was i just a game? did even really want me? or was i just a fun summer fling? someone you could let go of when you're done messing around with them?"
you were getting angry.
"i can't let you go!" he snapped, loudly echoing down the hall. he didn't even notice, didn't care. you had to understand. "i can't stop thinking about you. you never left my mind. i see you everywhere i go. i kept all of our pictures in the foundation, i can't go anywhere without thinking about you! i never wanted anyone else. i just wanted you and i was stupid and stuck up and i left you! i loved you"
you stayed silent as he breathed heavily, running his hands through his hair. he couldn't look at you, not after that.
"i'm sorry, i shouldn't bother you-" he begun, voice quiet. he was ashamed. he was the solid hawthorne, he never broke. but you weren't a hawthorne game, a mystery. you were not what he was used to and he as much as he hated feeling like this, you were worth it.
you cut him off, "stop it" he looked up now as your voice cracked. you were crying. his hand raised, instinctually, ready to hold you but paused as he remembered you weren't his. "stop it" you repeated, turning away from him and fiercely attempting to wipe away your tears.
you hated him, you hated the way he made you feel. you hated that you loved him.
he stayed quiet, unsure what to say. was this it? were you telling him to leave, to never talk to you again. you stepped towards him again, eyes narrowed and trying to keep up the angry facade.
"i hate you so much, grayson hawthorne" he could practically feel his heart break the minute those words left your lips. "you're so-" you threw your hands up, unable to voice just how frustrated you were. "how dare you come here? how dare you come back to me now? you're so annoying! i hate you! i hate how much i think about you. i hate that you're always on my mind. i hate that i can't stop watching your interviews, that i can't stop looking up whether you have a girlfriend. i hate you so much.." you trailed off, hands clutching at his suit jacket as you teared up again.
"i loved you, gray.. i love you so much" he didn't know if it was a mistake that you had changed the tense of that sentence but he wasn't going to question it. not now that you were in his arms. he gently embraced you, head pressing into your neck, breathing in your familiar perfume. you were so beautiful.
"y/n?" a voice called from down the hall, confused. "i heard yelling, are you okay?"
you froze in his arms, slowly pulling back and patting your face dry. you looked just as you had when you'd led him down the corridor. beautiful. "everything's fine, darling. we were just catching up"
darling. grayson's heart twisted in a painful way at the word leaving you mouth. his eyes narrowed coldly at the man standing at the end of the corridor. "gray, this is my date.." you gently introduced the two, frowning slightly. unnoticeable to your date but he knew.
as you went to leave again, you took his hand, squeezing it tightly. "gray" you whispered, your eyes shining. "wait for me, please? please, i can't lose you again" he almost couldn't speak, stunned. he nodded, dumbly. hand chasing yours as you disappeared.
his hand may have been cold, but his heart was warm. for you, he would wait forever.
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tags 🫶 @pockyyasii
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dickiebirdie37 · 16 hours
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i have so many thoughts about bridgerton s3 part 1 (mostly positive because i LOVEDLOVEDLOVED the first part) but this discourse about how penelope should've chosen debling and not colin is really something that makes me so sad.
like people who think debling is a better choice (which btw he isn't) want pen to settle for a loveless marriage. pen wants LOVE and she wants to be loved. she comes from a family who doesn't really love or even like her. her sisters insult her (prudence called her fat in s1 and they think the only way she can have a suitor is when she blackmails him wtf ???) and her mother thinks she is delusional for even thinking that she could get a husband in her third season and knowing that people still want her to choose debling???? debling himself told her that his work takes up so much space in his life that he probably would never love her and this is the guy who pen should choose wtf
i think it's very telling that certain people don't want pen to choose colin, the person she loves, but want her to settle for debling. why is it always the character that is not conventionally thin (yes, i know that pen is not really a plus-size character but she is also not as conventionally thin as the other two leading ladies) that has to settle for a loveless marriage? why can't she chose colin who loves her and desires her and who doesn't want to leave her for three years to look after his estate.
pen would be so unhappy if she married debling. she would be all alone and yeah idk
colin made mistakes (just as pen has made mistakes) but he truly loves her and the moment he realized his feelings he yearned for her and wanted to be with her and this is what pen deserves. she deserves love and someone who wants her and loves her and someone who doesn't want to leave her.
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lets-laughagain · 3 days
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Hi! I saw that you were in 3 shows of Louis in Brasil. Do you mind sharing your favorite moments of each show? If you do mind ignore my ask, I just love reading fan experiences of Louis' shows.
I hope you have a nice day!
hiii i'm sorry it took so long, i was enjoying the rest of my vacation then i got sick due to the different weathers in every city 😬, but anyways here we gooo
i know you asked for my favorite moments but i talk too much and rambled about everything kjsdnadsk
RIO I got to the venue at 7pm, after a lot of traffic and anxiety 🫠, and there was still a big line to get in making giant rooks go on stage 15 minutes later than expected. I had listened a bit to them when the opening acts were announced but i loooved seeing them live, their concert was so much fun, i had a lot on my mind that day but as soon as they started playing my worries were gone like, music is everything really.
The venue's capacity is for 18k people, but i guess there were about 12k there? I'm not sure but, the chairs around me were half empty (a lot of people moved to closer seats), the floor was full but the stands not so much yk. It makes sense when you think it was on a wednesday and a lot of people couldn't make it.
As I went alone to this one and there weren't many people around me it was like me and louis and just letting out all of my emotions. Idk if it happens to anyone else, but I get a lot more emotional when I'm alone at shows. I don't even have much to say here cause I was really there in the moment giving my all, screaming my lungs out to hoth and feeling all this time deep in my soul (the drama lmao).
SÃO PAULO I was really tired after barely a day of rest at home, then packing another bag to curitiba, it was hectic, but thank god i had stands tickets again and my friends got there ealier and saved a seat for me.
Not to paraphrase harry but, that show was loud, loud and LOUD. Seriously, I've never seen so many people scream and jump for an opening act?? I was actually kinda shocked at how full the stadium was, its full capacity is 60k but as they were using only half the space i guess there were about 25k-30k people, it was really packed. Like, that video from outside the stadium that you can hear the screams is kinda crazy if you think it wasn't at full capacity.
This concert left me so proud of him, of how far he has come, like he said with no radio support or anything, seeing him in my favorite venue in my city with so many people screaming for him was something really special. This one was really about US, the fans and louis, i can't say it enough but the crowd was like part of the show too. Also, the big stage, the catwalk, the fireworks, those things made it all so much bigger, like a celebration for where he is now. I'll never forget his face impressed by the crowd like every five seconds, he deserves it all, i love this man to death.
His only wrongs that day tho were wearing that ugly outfit and not singing saturdays on a saturday!!!!
CURITIBA I had slept for like 4 hours, took a flight in the morning and spent the whole day kinda sick and anxious, I really do not know were i took forces to this concert but i did and i gave 200% of myself. I had floor tickets this time so i let myself go and jump around like crazy.
We stayed in the left side of the stage were it was a lot more chill and we could walk around. Most of the time I stayed a bit close to the stage but not so much cause i like having my own space to breath, sometimes I'd get closer to record something. By the encore I found an empty space in the far left of the barricade to see him better during silver tongues.
For me it was the most fun concert, you could see louis was happy, there was a group in front of me dancing and having so much fun together, like he said no one will stand still in a brazilian crowd that's for sure! Also, there was this girl who was talking to us before the concert who found me during the encore and we literally just screamed wdbhg at each other lmao i don't even know her name, but i can't stop thinking about it, it was really funny.
Oh and that outfit!!!! The way i screamed when i saw him in all black, i kept looking at my friends like why the fuck does this man look so good!!! WE WON!!!!
When the barricade moment happened I was only looking at him so I didn't understand what was going on, then by the end my friends said he was with a kid, but only when i got to the apartment we were staying i saw the full context and video, that broke me. He so sweet and precious, it makes everything i did for him so much more worth it than it already was, this plus the donations for Rio Grande do Sul filled my heart with so much love for him.
Also, after the concert we were trying to buy merch, but most sizes were sold out, the line was huge and security was hushing people out of the stadium 🙃 then 10 minutes later we found out louis was playing football at the pitch lmao
Some other points - I absolutely LOVE the stage design, the lights and screens going up and down work so great, it's amazing to witness it live - THE BAND, i don't even need to say anything right? his band is fucking incredible, i live for every single guitar solo from michael - The 2 seconds that takes people to realize that he is singing night changes and wdbhg are the funniest shit istg kskdnkll - People will ask me why I would go to the same concert 3 times, and just istg it IS different, they are all different experiences and i'd do it all over again (which i actually did, cause i saw louis twice and harry 3 times in 2022)
---
Last but not least, i will to speak in portuguese to thank my friends skjndkjsan
Eu sei que ela não vai ler, mas muito obrigada @hiddlestomlinson por aceitar fazer essa maluquice comigo, por vir até SP, ir pra Curitiba e me aturar por 5 dias seguidos, mesmo com tanto cansaço e doença foi tudo maravilhoso 🥹💜
@delicatepointofview de novo, muito obrigada por me ajudar tanto no Rio e pelo ingresso de última hora, mesmo passando por tanta coisa você foi um anjo 🥹 só conseguimos nos ver de longe, desse 🤏 tamanho, mas da proxima vem aí!!
@somuchstrdst e @icouldbeluckyagain amei encontrar e curtir um pouco do show com vocês!! NÓS VENCEMOS MUITO!!! ste, eu ate tava vendo seu recap hoje tomando café da tarde ajksndkjs
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the-cooler-king · 12 days
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Oh yeah..... midnight gospel be hitting.... sitting in my bed fuckin. Crying. Get a grip girl
#Its the trudy ep which is actually the episode that made me keep watching#I love love love this episode.....#Something about how.......... idk.... its a very profound ep that I can't explain and it's a nice cry#This ep kind of shaped my outlook on life especially after finding out about my friend dying#All the regrets and things left unsaid.... I make my peace daily by being really straight up#If I love and care about ppl I tell them... I say they are appreciated and cared for man#I am always thankful for people and I *love* people as a whole#And as long as the people around me intrinsically know that they are loved and cared for and cherished.... like that's it#That's the end game truly#I will never ever be sorry for that. This was THEEEE episode.#There's a lot of nuance behind my feelings best described by revolutionary girl utena#But still. I'm deep enough in my tags bc I'm crying over my s/o but not in a bad way#Fml I am so grateful to him as just an entity. As a person in my life even if our lives only intersect for this brief period of time#He hasn't been texting me much and we didn't talk much at work and I didn't even get a goodbye (rude lol)#But I know he was having a rough day. I know he needs a bit of tlc.#He could be on a downswing because I am certainly on an upswing#So I'm kind of like trying to focus on doing my own thing rn without worrying about it#Because I can't do anything about it so I might as well continue My Thang#But as I sometimes come to terms with us never talking again (gotta be prepared at all times to be ghosted)#I also come back to terms with needing him to really understand#how many people in his life depend on love cherish and admire him#And im not just talking about me... he has a lot of siblings and a not great mom. Two kids he loves.#He has always taken care of everyone else in his life#He deserves to really know and idk. It makes me think of this moment.#Realizing how much I dont ever want to question if he knows#I don't want to question if I could've done more or tried harder etc. I did my very best and didn't lie cheat steal or whatever#I am so grateful to him for letting me have that. Even if nothing can come from it in the end#Even if we should be torn apart!!!! Take my revolution!!!#Anyways. Here's wonderwall#Banger of an episode. Worth the rewatch
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lameow-l · 6 months
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so wait… furina is the name of the archon role that “furina” had to play
wouldn’t make more sense narrative wise to give her a name of her own?? like scara gets his own epic chapter about him ridding himself of his past and adopting a new name then proceed to ignore said name in favor of “hat guy” but the actress playing “furina” doesn’t get to be known for her own name?
like people of fontain (partly maybe) know the truth so why not let her free? let her enjoy the simple human life she so so longed for? even the other furina wouldn’t want this
#i think her story is a better use of the (give character name) mechanic that wasn’t really needed in scara’s arc imo#like yeah it’s cool and all but we literally saw him throw the actual physical manifestation of his past into the fucking void!!!#i personally think it was kind of wasted on him on top of me thinking that idea was entirely stupid to begin with and hyv keeps proving tha#no one actually refers to him as wanderer or by the name they choose online.. its just scara#thats both bad marketing and confusing burying the character away from new players#and like the amount of shit u have to go through as a new player just to name ur weird huge hat angry little dude is just..#but imagine how impactful such a mechanic would be for ‘furina’ who spent all her live acting a role she wasn’t#at the end of all that agony do u think she could endure hearing people call her by that name??#unlike scara she did that for the people every moment of those 500 years knowing that the fate of every person is mere a breakdown away#there was nothing in that for her or for a reward she thought deserved.. just suffering on her own#it just makes more sense for her to want a different name a different identity that has nothing to do with that role#and again i think that mechanic is stupid anyway but if it had to happen i’d loved it more with ‘furina’#or idk give her like a clueless friend she gets to meet that keeps calling her a different name for reasons and her liking the name or smth#maybe give her a different role she gets to play.. or have neuvillette give her a name#same with scara i think it would have been a lot better if he went by a name he choose when all his previous names were chosen for him#i dont see how the entirety of genshin writers and devs agreed to this mechanic being implemented honestly#like traveler is literally there waiting for a single soul to address them by their actual name (the one we choose) but every time it’s jus#traveler traveler.. even their most beloved companion calls them traveler#like that alone should've changed the writers minds bc such a name would 1. either not ever be used or replaced by a nickname#2. the hell devs had to go through to not allow certain phrases and names and 3. the hell both teams will suffer should they add a new char#tl;dr stupid dumb mechanic but they should still give furina a new name#genshin impact#furina#fontaine archon quest#scaramouche
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nandermoenthusiast · 2 months
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oh my god i got so emotional SHUT UUUUUP
#911#911verse#evan buckley#so this is what crying about a character is actually like#like i do be crying at times dont get me wrong#but i just love buck so much. i kept stopping the episode and going. omg omg omg#omg its happening. omg idk if i can actually watch this. omg its happening !!!!!!!!!!!#jesus christ JESUS CHRIST#like i know we throw the word around a lot but this is MY SON#and everything that happened in the episode. it was like it was happening to me#i felt actual physical damage and actual butterflies as the kiss moment approached#like theY DID THAT#THEY MADE MY BI SON CANONICALLY BI#idk to have this shift in a characters perception this late in a procedural….. 911 you gods#i really hope they can somehow make more seasons cause they would deserve ti#it. and like. this doesn’t have to be the end of buddie??#they could get them together at any time bc buck realizing hes into men is a lot other worm can than buck realizing hes in love with#his best friend. i just dont know how they would do it with eddie bc they would have to pull a lot of focus over there too with a big#chance of feeling repetitive with their narratives#maybe they just show them together after a timejump and say they worked some stuff out idk lmao#ANYWAY I AM STILL CRYING BECAUSE BUCK MY SON IS A CANONICAL BISEXUAL JEALOUS DISASTER JUST LIKE HIS MAMA ❤️#THIS IS WHAT REPRESENTATION IS ACTUALLY ALL ABOUT (and i mean his horrifying handling of the feelings of being left out of course lmao)#THE LOOK EDDIE SHOT HIM TOO#i am too frazzled rn i just need to scream i think#hi. im sorry this is me coming out of the 911 closet now that wwdits is on hiatus#evan buckley!!!!!#SON OF MY SONS#LIGHT OF MY LIFE#APPLE OF MY EYE
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hydrasaura · 5 months
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when i said that mha ripped off naruto (which i said only to piss off mha stans anyway) I didn't mean to sound like i was praising naruto. it was actually more like a sigh of disappointment, a reaction to seeing that all the problems that naruto had as a show transpired trough mha too and i was tired because watching naruto was enough for me but then i realized that my problem actually is that i can no longer stand watching shonen anime and i chose not to tire myself by cringing at the repetitive tropes and cliches anymore
#demon slayer falls under the same category sadly#actually it was more a combination of these 2 that made me realize that i had enough of this genre#me judging other shonen having as reference only naruto#but look! i watched both mha and demon slayer and my personal point was proven that i would get bored by them#(with the exception of some rare moments that were really good in mha but the bad and cringe moments made me forget abt them)#like i remember crying bcs this dude who trained deku died but then i remembered that a few episodes earlier he ''punished''#one of his female students by tying her up a ledge and tickling her with a feather :|#LIKE WHY DID YOU NEED TO PUT THAT IN THE STORY? HORIKOSHI OR WHATEVER THE MANGAKA'S NAME IS#WHY YOU FELT THE NEED TO ADD THAT IN???#and then you tried to make me feel sorry for the guy too?#that was such a jiraya death moment like they were playing it a sad but all i could think abt was ''rip bozo''#not saying that other anime don't have cringe moments. even moments that i had to skip because of how gruesome they were#but they sorta make sense in the big picture of the story? but other characters experience it too not just a category of people? idk#also it's funny how pissed mha stans get for having their show insulted like#when i tell ppl that my fave anime/manga are evangelion; black lagoon#and berserk they look at me like i deserve to be put in an electric chair#like they are right but at the same time i find it funny and i rly don't care#but these guys always go bananas if you insult their fav show as if you broke the geneva convention#i'd say that it's because the majority of the fans are children but i know for a fact that they are not 😭
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the-meme-monarch · 1 year
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Can you explain Strange Someone Frisk’s motivations a bit more? I don’t really understand how they could go from being a nice supportive kid to tampering with things in DR
well frisk Does appear to be nice and nonviolent even without the SOUL’s control (sans saying “even when you ran away you did it with a smile” and seemingly feeling guilty for taking more than one piece of candy (the bowl tipping over and the narration saying “you felt like the scum of the earth”(unless that’s just chara trying to guilt them/you)) and we know from deltarune that while the SOUL controls what frisk and kris do, where they walk and what they say, it doesn’t control how they say things, like kris saying things sarcastically/confusedly/as a joke when it’s a choice they don’t particularly agree with (like the “perish” being said enthusiastically, or saying they’d go to the festival w ralsei or noelle and not sounding like the Actually Want To).
and similarly to kris ithink ss frisk feels. lost. without the soul. in the context of the au, frisk doesn’t remember anything before falling into mt ebott. idk it’d they even remember their life before that day. idk if they even had one. they maybe convinced themself that they were literally made for their role, and didn’t exist before then. maybe them causing problems through the secret bosses is them trying to get the SOUL’s attention, bc the SOUL’s influence is all they know, and they know the SOUL is here now.
they’re messed up in a similar fashion as jevil and spamton (and presumably the other secret bosses we have yet to meet) but where as they were Told by frisk about their roles as characters in a story, and jevil’s method of coping being that he’s “free”, and spamton’s is by trying to escape, frisk was made aware by their firsthand experience, and has turned to telling the secret bosses. and well, while i don’t know Why frisk would let this knowledge upon them when they’d been previously kindhearted, maybe it has to do w like. their life being entirely upended by the game ending and being shunted out of that universe as a result. maybe they feel cheated. maybe they feel that doing good isn’t worth it. maybe they feel like they can’t do good without the SOUL telling them to do so. maybe they don’t even realize or think that what they’re doing is causing harm, maybe they think that telling them What’s Really Up is a good thing. they did actually help spamton, for a time.
think that makes flowey’s plea for the player not to reset, to leave the game alone let frisk have their happy ending, kinda. ironic. not that resetting Would Have done them any favors either.
also if i was made fully aware that my life was little more than a means to tell a story i think I’d snap a little bit too. my life is a game maybe I am tired of being nice, maybe I do just want to go apeshit. maybe I’ll cause some problems on purpose
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aquarri · 1 year
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#anon#there are very few people i truly hate on the earth and louis is not one of them#really my 'hate' for him comes from a place of love and the want for them to do better#because they deserve better! and they can achieve that#yeah recently i've been hating on him and have been 'unsupportive' but thats how i deal with people who are in my eyes being stupid#making poor decisions#its very hard for me to see something and brush it under the rug#(not supporting the doc bc i dont want a doc that isn't truly authentic or made without the public lies)#im not someone whos gonna sit back and laugh when i see something i dont like ya know?#(please dont call me a solo harrie bc i think you missed my hating harry holivia era :D that was a shit show and harry was acting stupid#and i said that and didnt support that either lol)#not that i need to justify anything but i complain about hshq and tour all the time#im not gonna hate on harry bc hes not pissing me off rn? lol#its tough love sorry anon ik my worth and what i deserve to give to people based on what they give back#is that parasocial? idk but i also dont need to blindly follow and act happy when im not?#also i hate the word “stan” im just here observing the drama talking on my little blog about millionaire men that annoy me sometimes#i really do want better for them thats why im here at least thats what brought me here#i do like louis or at least i liked what he stood for in previous years but idk both of them seem to be kind of lost at the moment#this just turned into a ramble but anon im not a solo harrie nor will i ever be#i would like to be called a hater larrie.#why would i be directing hater energy at harry when he just sang woman after louis did ~that~#im not gonna praise him for stunting with a 22 y/o playing daddy and releasing a copy lg doc lmao
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laomelettedufromage · 2 years
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So apparently when you graduate college, you get to unlock a whole new sleuth of issues depending on what you do or happens after
#hiiiiii making tumblr my diary again<3333#today is another bad day which I was afraid we were heading here#I think a lot of it is I just got less sleep#and it always seems to get worse on the weekends when everyone is like out partying and doing stuff yknow#anyways I used to be a very independent person who was good at keeping myself from being lonely and bored#but now I’m struggling very hard with both of those things which just feels so DUMB#but while there’s some things I can do to kinda help alleviate the boredom#there’s really nothing I can do for the loneliness at the moment which kinda sucks#and also the loneliness is definitely new#like it isn’t but me identifying it as loneliness is new#I think originally I was chalking it up to jealousy and boredom#and those two emotions are definitely still there#but I don’t think I’m giving loneliness enough credit😅#which sucks because I’m not technically ALONE… ever#it’s just my coworker doesn’t really fill the hole yknow?? and then I also feel bad for him for that#even though I know that’s not my guilt to take on#but I know I’ve been very moody IM MOODY RIGHT NOW and it’s hard to keep that contained and so some of it gets taken out on him#which feels bad because he doesn’t deserve it AT ALL#and also I really do want to leave a good impression on these people😔#idk man maybe after I eat I’ll like walk around or something#call one of my roommates#and then maybe start work on sewing my Jean jacket or somethin#it’s going to be a long month and my brain seems determined to make it suck😅#personal
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meticulousfragments · 2 months
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I don’t know if anyone else who follows me has both read the book and seen the movie Poor Things
But I read it this week and watched the movie last night and I feel like I need to talk about it with someone because it’s still rattling around in my head
#visually the movie was absolutely stunning. deserved the production awards it got without a doubt#and some of the changes I really did enjoy#the change in camera and filming style to fit tone was amazing in ways I don’t have the film vocab to fully compliment#making Godwin also somewhat monstrous but also adding the aspect of felicity was something I found so interesting bc he SHOULD becomplicated#dafoe was great with that complication though#and I liked that it was focused more on Bella and not filtered through two different men’s views#(even though I do think those filters were very much part of the point in the book it wouldn’t have worked as well in a movie)#some of the plot streamlining made a lot of sense. making everything in the house feel unreal was a great choice#I do think they made McCandless come off sweeter than I found him in the book? maybe just bc the actor was charming idk#ruffalo was excellent playing a man who Sucks#the Alexandria moment I liked but I feel like beyond that they really glossed over some of the themes of class and healthcare disparity?#Paris touched on it for sure but it felt more present in the books esp with including Bella’s career#and I don’t know how I feel about the ending#I understand making it more hopeful than the book. but what she did with the general I’m kind of. meh. can’t decide#but I also didn’t fully love the ending of the book either so idk how I feel overall#but this will be a story that stays with me I think
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imasimpforshanks · 7 months
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how they react when you randomly say “im so lucky to have you”
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ft. luffy, law, zoro, sanji, ace, shanks
a/n: idk what this is but I thought of it! And it’s been a while since I’ve written headcanons/imagines like this so this is kinda weird and badly written this time LOL
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with a giant grin plastered across his face, luffy’s response is instant and genuine, “im so lucky to have you too!” he laughs boisterous and bright as he continues, “that’s perfect isn’t it? im lucky to have you and you’re lucky to have me! we sure do make a great team.” you can’t help the way your body shakes with warm laughter at his sincerity.
there’s a moment of silence as law gathers himself. you think he didn’t hear you but then he coughs to break the silence and gain your attention. the tips of his ears are pink and he’s avoiding eye contact with you as he mumble his response, “yeah well, thanks for putting up with me.”
zoro pauses briefly turning to look at you with mild surprise. but before he’s even had time to fully process your remark, he finds his lips quirking into a smirk as you add on “i mean you are a bit of a moron, but you’re MY moron, ya know?” and with that he’s laughing the most he has in a while (but you’ve always had that affect on him, always made him feel things he didn’t think was possible), “you took the words right out of my mouth, dumbass.”
“my love,” sanji exclaims, “it’s me who should be considered the lucky one!” he gently reaches for your hand to bring it to his lips. he places a delicate kiss to each of your knuckles before continuing his sentiment, “i get to see your wonderful face and spend time with you each day. it’s far more than i am worthy of!” but then your eyebrows knit together and your lips are being pulled into a pout and sanji feels his love for you grow tenfold as you object to his statement, “you deserve all my love and affection!” and sanji concedes immediately because your word is law.
wordlessly, ace pulls you into a tight embrace, burying his face in the crook of your neck. “you okay?” you ask, and the concern in your voice is enough to make his heart melt. “yeah, can we just stay like this for a little.” he whispers into your skin. you nod, understanding his need for this reassurance, “i mean it though, i really am lucky to have you.” and as you slowly run your fingers through his hair, ace whispers “i really really love you.”
a cheeky grin sneaks across shanks’ face “you sure are! i am pretty funny, sexy, caring, and intelligent.” you snort at his expected response, “not to mention humble.” he gasps in faux shock, “of course! how could I forget humble?!” as you burst into a fit of laughter so beautifully unrestrained shanks can’t help but think that out of the two of you, he is, most certainly, the lucky one.
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kookslastbutton · 7 months
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Guilty Pleasures ༓ jjk, kth (m) | ch. i
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✑ Summary: Three years of being Seoul's power couple earns you nothing but a big fat divorce settlement and your face plaster on every gossip column around town. You're angry, hurt, and desperately want to move on, but worst of all? You're still in love with the man who started the whole mess, even though the most he can ever see you as is a friend. The renowned actor you've hired to be your company's new endorser seems to have a soft spot for you though. He's easy on the eyes, you'll admit, but who actually wants a divorcee like yourself? It's unrealistic really.
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pairing: ex-husband ceo!jungkook x ceo!reader, slight actor!taehyung x ceo!reader
genre/AU: angst, smut, loverstoexesto ?, unrequited love
word count: 3,328
Warnings: oc and jk are both 30, mention of gossip columns and unequal treatment of how oc is portrayed post-divorce, hint of differences between men and women in the business world, oc struggling to be professional, both care about each other and are not toxic but oc fell in love, oc has the need to groom him a little out of habit, talks about Bam, feat, Namjoon and Taehyung, and sexual content
sexual warnings: dom!jungkook, sub!reader, desk s*x, d*rty talk, oc is on bc, handjob, swearing, making out, neck kisses, clothed s*x, impulsive s*x, light praising, growling, some minor petnames (baby, Kook), mention of threesome, recalling of past sexual events
playing: Unkiss Me
a/n: uh…this one has been in my drafts and idk its kinda angsty but I decided I will share it. Enjoy! 🥰
series masterlist | next >>
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From the moment he stepped into your office, Jungkook could tell every ounce of color was drained from your face. All except for your puffy red eyes that is, which he knows you've been rubbing fervently to keep your tears from rolling down your cheeks.
He doesn't blame you for it though–you're his ex-wife.
Recent ex-wife that is.
For three years the two of you masqueraded as the perfect power couple; appearing completely in love to the public eye in hopes of forming an unshakable business partnership (transaction more like). You attended charity balls together, collaborated on several work projects, and attended countless corporate functions to establish both your presence in your respective industries.
That's right, you and Jungkook were in an arranged marriage and it would have flourished into a classic love story if it wasn't for one obvious detail–you're the only one that fell in love.
Despite all the times he's called you "stunning" when you dolled up for formal events or that you "feel so good" during late-night sex, Jungkook never truly loved you. He cared about you, did his best not to intentionally hurt you, and even tried loving you back; thinking he could fall for you with time.
But the most he could ever see you as is a friend, a beautiful friend, though a friend nonetheless. He knows how much it pains you, especially after you've held out hope that he'll want you the same way someday. This one embarrasses you the most which he wishes it wouldn't.
Well, Jungkook doesn't want to trap either of you in a loveless marriage any longer. So even if it means being the center of gossip columns for a while, he's giving you a divorce so you can find the right person to share your love with.
After all, you deserve it; you both do.
Today's day one of looking at one another as exes and it's bittersweet, to say the least. The only factor that would make this worse is if children were in the equation, but there aren't any.
"Thanks for letting me swing by __," he speaks first, doing his best to conjure up a genuine smile. The black floral button-up he's wearing suits him well and his smooth chest peaking out near the collar is far too tempting, yet you know better than to let your eyes linger.
"Of course," you answer and grab a small box from behind your desk. "These are 100% yours so I wouldn't keep them from you." Jungkook takes the box of belongings from your hands with slight hesitation. You're keeping a brave front for the sake of civility and professionalism.
He doesn't blame you for that either.
As a CEO of a large multinational corporation himself, Jungkook's no stranger to the age-old philosophy that that office is no place to let your personal woes get out of hand; you have a team to lead and a reputation to uphold. The latter is proving to be harder for you than him, however, being that the media is portraying you as some kind of she-devil, spinster, or worse of all—a cheater.
Jungkook plans to personally make sure those articles get removed from the public eye before the end of the week. (Not that he'll tell you though.)
"I still could have dropped by the house to pick these up if it'd been easier. I feel bad for interrupting your work day over a couple of old books, records, and dog toys." He watches you nod silently as he vocalizes the inconvenience of it all; he really doesn't have to but he does it anyway.
"No, it's alright. You haven't been to the house since you moved out, so I thought it'd be better if we met here instead." You pause to check the time. "If there's anything you think of that you might've forgotten later, just let me know. In the meantime, I have a meeting in twenty so..."
"He misses you."
"I'm sorry?"
"Bam, I mean." Jungkook throws the box under an arm and pulls out his phone. He scrolls through his camera gallery until he gets to one particular photo of a red and tan Doberman. "He hates the new place and all he does is sulk by the door."
Your heart's already struggling to settle down from the painful reality that the man you love is leaving you, let alone being reminded of another forced separation. Bam's the closest thing to a baby that either of you ever had and he was one of the few things that bonded you and your now ex-husband together.
Being Jungkook's dog, however, he couldn't stay with you. That means no more visiting the dog park, sneaking treats behind Jungkook's back, and snuggling together in the king-size bed after a stressful day.
"I'm sure he just wants his favorite chew toy that's been held hostage at the house," you joke lightly, thinking it simpler to spin the topic. It's similar to what Jungkook does when he uses flowery language to soften the cold hard truth of your divorce; that he doesn't love you and he can't ever. "Give Bam a lot of attention for me. I miss him too."
"Of cour—shit!" When Jungkook moves to slip his phone back into his pocket he loses his balance, causing the box with his belongings to spill out on your office floor. Naturally, you kneel down to help him clean up the mess. It's not until your fingers reach for the same item and come into contact with each other that you quickly retract your hand. "Sorry, did I shock you?" He asks gently and tosses the last item into the box before standing up.
"No, you didn't." You rise to your feet as well, until you're face to face with him. This time it's closer than before. His hooded eyes stare straight into yours and you can't believe it takes being inches from his face to notice how bloodshot his eyes are. "You look exhausted. You should go home and rest Kook." The petname is out before your brain tells you to stop.
Jungkook's eyes widen, the corner of his lip subtly quirking up for the first time since the start of the conversation. "Don't worry about me __. I probably get more breaks than you do. But thanks." He briefly glances at the ticking Snoopy clock behind you, a Christmas gift he gave you as a joke last year. "You still have that?"
You look over your shoulder at the small, Snoopy-shaped digital clock on your desk. Ten minutes until your next meeting. "It's cute and it makes for a great conversation starter with clients so I guess so. If you want me to give it ba—"
"Keep it," he interrupts. "Please, it was a gift and I'd like you to have it if you enjoy it." Jungkook gnaws on his lip before continuing. "Speaking of clients and business partners, I should make myself scarce now shouldn't I?"
"Yes. I do have that meeting soon." But once he leaves, neither of you is sure when you'll see the other again aside from the odd charity event. The Annual Winter Gala in December is one that particularly comes to mind.
Most high-ranking executives like yourselves attend the function to keep up appearances and to network with other professionals. Last year, you and Jungkook were the center of attention however now that you're divorced, you fear you'll be avoided like the plague—they always preferred Jungkook over you anyway.
"You're forming a new partnership with that actor, right? Kim Taehyung? I read an inkling about it online yesterday." He also read his whole biography too. The man is equally handsome as he is altruistic and kind.
"Nothing's signed and sealed yet. I'm sure you've heard that he's gotten dozens of other offers on the table. To be honest, I'm surprised you haven't nabbed him yet."
"Yeah, we don't need...wait sorry, let me rephrase that. We aren't ready for a new partner or merger yet."
You can read between the lines despite Jungkook's correction. His company is thriving more than yours in every way, so he doesn't need the help of a third-party endorser...like you. Well, you're not doing too shabby yourself and this isn't simply about fame and fortune you want to argue.
The head poking through your door stops you from following through on that last line.
"Mrs. Jeon—shit." Your secretary Kim Namjoon screws his eyes shut at his drastic misstep. "Ms. __, Kim Taehyung called and said he'll be a bit late due to unexpected delays during his filming today. He apologizes profusely but is on his way over now. Sajangnim," he bows at Jungkook respectively.
"That's fine, Namjoon, thank you. You can send him in whenever he gets here. Mr. Jeon was just about to leave and I had the rest of my day cleared."
"Of course. I'll let him know to come in." Your secretary nods and shuts the door. Jungkook shifts between his feet once Namjoon is out of sight, a habit he's picked up that tells you he has more to say.
"Was there anything else, Mr. Jeon?" You shuffle a few files on your desk, prepping for your meeting with Taehyung. At this point, you're not even looking at Jungkook.
"Mr. Jeon? I think I prefer when you call me Kook more," he mutters, allowing his line of sight to catch a glimpse of your lips. "Can I...kiss you? Before I go."
The question knocks the wind out of your lungs and you instantly lift your head up toward him. "Kiss me?" You gulp slowly, then shake your head. "No, I'd rather we not. Goodbye kisses aren't really my thing." You couldn't be a bigger liar, evident from the sudden churning in your gut. Having Jungkook's lips on yours was the best and worst moments of your entire relationship but you have to fight yourself....your innate desires that tell you to say yes.
"Okay, I understand. What about a hug?"
"Jungkook..."
"I'm sorry, I'm pushing. Thanks again for my stuff." He gestures at the box under his arm. "I hope your meeting with Kim Taehyung goes well. Maybe I'll see you both at the next Winter Gala." He makes a beeline for the door.
"Wait!"
Jungkook stills in his tracks as he watches you stride in front of him. He's unsure what you stopped him for until your hands reach out towards his shirt collar, smoothing the delicate material down. A light smile plays on his face as you do this, though he says nothing aside from a simple 'thanks'.
"It was bothering me the whole time." You finish fixing his collar and peer up into his Bambi eyes. Out of all the potential suitors, you wish Jeon Jungkook didn't become your husband. It's not like you got to keep him or anything.
Jungkook once again flickers his gaze toward your barely parted lips. And this time, you do the same for him. Before either of you have time to back out you lean forward and kiss him.
It's a hard kiss too. Painful but so inviting that neither of you pulls away.
With his free hand, Jungkook snakes a hand around your waist to hug you close. Having his fingers pressed against the small of your back is so familiar and all you can do is deepen the kiss.
You're obviously not the only one that gets a sense of pleasure from this because, in a matter of seconds, the box from under Jungkook's arm falls to the ground. He then places his second hand on the side of your neck and jawline which you lean into, exposing the other side of your neck.
"Jungkook," you gasp when his lips attach themself to the soft skin, sucking lightly. His teeth come out and nip too. "Wait, we can't do this, we shouldn't. Taehyung, he'll be here soon."
"That would have sounded so convincing if you didn't just moan the words, baby." He walks you backward until you're forced to sit atop your mahogany desk.
"Don't call me that." You allow him to push up your pencil skirt and spread your thighs until your panties are the only material he sees. You decided to go with black lace today, his favorite now that you think about it.
"Did you—"
"No, they weren't for you."
A brief growl leaves the man's rose-tinted lips. "In that case, we don't need them." He places both hands on your hips and brings you into another kiss, messier than before. His tongue shoves between the seam of your lips to lick every crevasse he can. He hasn't kissed you like this for months and to be brutally honest, he's missed it as much as you.
Jungkook hasn't been with anyone else since marrying you either, which means he's completely adjusted to your body, your preferences, and what turns you on. The same applies to you so while he's busy shoving his tongue down your throat, you palm his half-harden bulge through his trousers.
"Mm," he groans and bucks his hips into your hand. You smile at how well you've managed to draw a response from him. With a little burst of confidence, you hastily move to unbuckle his pants. "What are you doing?" He mumbles between kisses.
You decide not to answer, preferring to reach inside his trousers to take his length out. You make sure to pump it a few times until he's fully hard. Jungkook has a gorgeous dick, and that takes a lot for you to admit.
"Fuck, that's it." He says with gritted teeth, now watching your hand as it moves up and down his cock. "Get me how you want me."
"We don't have much time." You slide your panties down your legs and spread your thighs wide apart, which makes Jungkook's eyes dilate about 10 meters. "Fuck me, please." One last time. Make love to me one last time.
"Are you sure? I don't have a condom."
"It's okay, I'm on birth control. As long as you're still clean then its fine."
"I am. I got tested recently. But are you sure you want this?"
You glance at his pulsating length, tip leaking with pre-cum, and swallow hard. "Hurry."
"Fuck, okay." Jungkook wastes not another second and guides you flat on your back, his hands resting on either side of your body. The coolness of your desk has you shiver slightly. He then urges you to raise your legs until they can wrap loosely around his slim waist. And as if second nature, you link your arms around his neck as he eases him into you. He's able to bottom out without much effort thanks to how wet you've become.
"Oh god." Your back arches off the surface of your desk as Jungkook thrusts into you. They're only practice thrusts at first to get you re-adjusted to his size, yet the pleasure zipping down your spine already has your eyes rolling up.
You shouldn't be doing this at all. Your conscious whispers to again to which you blindly dismiss. You'll enjoy it now and tomorrow, start a new—another lie you tell yourself.
"Fuckfuckfuck, you're so wonderful for me," he chants while pushing his cock in and out of you, the speed of his movements picking up to an insane rate. Jungkook never had an issue with quickies so he's likely in his element now. "You know what this reminds me of?" He cocks a smirk and kisses down your neck.
"Hm?"
"That time when we were abroad for a weekend conference. Remember when we stopped at my second office to pick up some files? You were so horny that day that you pushed me into my chair and demanded that I let you ride me. It took the wind right out of my sails to see you like that, so confident and in control." He prys apart the top button of your blouse until he can slide the material down your shoulders. He doesn't take it off completely, favoring the chance to place kisses on your newly exposed area instead.
"I was beyond stressed that day. It was the first time I had to speak at that conference and you looked so good with your freshly slicked back hair. I couldn't stop myself—oh fuck! Right there Kook, don't slow down. Please." Jungkook grunts at the use of his petname and fucks you rougher, sweat forming around his forehead as his dark hair dangles messily over his eyes.
You manage to sneak a glance at the time on your Snoopy clock between thrusts. "Shit, I need to come soon, or Kim Taehyung's never going to agree to do business with me." The man laughs and buries his head on your shoulder.
"You never know, he could be really into threesomes."
"Fuck! Don't joke about that." You claw at his back and surprise both of you with the unexpected clenching of your pussy.
"You're right, I take it back," he groans and continues to snap his hips. "Looks like he's not the one who wants a threesome after all, considering your body's response to the suggestion. You wanna ask him if he walks in?" He whispers in your ear and you're embarrassed that your cheeks burn at the thought.
Of course, Kim Taehyung was sexy and you've rehearsed to yourself dozens of times not to let yourself get any crazy ideas about him. Still, one unrequited love is enough for you; Taehyung wouldn't want a divorcee. You shake the train of thought before it has time to go any further. "Make me come, Kook. Need you to finish too. It's not just Taehyung who could walk in at any second."
Jungkook grunts and continues to thrust into you, bouncing you up and down his thick length as the desk shakes underneath you. He feels you getting closer and closer by the sporadic clenching of your walls squeezing him. A big part of him doesn't want this to end but it has to....he doesn't love you. He only wants to make you feel good before he has to say goodbye. Both of you come just before Namjoon calls your office phone, giving you a heads-up that Taehyung's about to enter your office.
Jungkook shoves his pants back on while you button up your blouse and fold over your skirt. You decided to shove your underwear in your bag with the lack of time. No one has any business digging in there anyway.
"How do I look?" You turn around to get a quick once-over from Jungkook but he's already out the door. Now the person standing in front of you is Kim Taehyung who has nothing but the most genuine smile.
"You look lovely as always Ms. __. I'm so sorry I'm late by the way. I feel terrible about it so I brought you these." Taehyung whips out a large bouquet of your favorite flowers. "Hope you don't mind that I did a little research on you ahead of time. I found out these have a special place in your heart."
You smile and accept the bouquet with thanks. As you set them on your desk, a messages comes through your phone. You manage to give a quick look.
Unknown Number: Sorry I had to duck so fast! I know it looked rude but Taehyung was already opening the door and you were dressed so I thought it'd be better if I left. Hope you're meeting goes well! And thanks for everything today ;) if you need anything, you have my number.
You flip your phone over and invite Taehyung to have a seat. Business is business, and you have to carry on even if your heart has completely sunk to the ground. Kim Taehyung is sweet anyway, so you'll enjoy his company.
Too bad you don't realize how much he enjoys yours as well.
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a/n: so, yeah... there's a potential for our Jk to actually love oc and not realize it but either way he does care about her (despite the impulsive sex). And yes, taehyung likes oc... it's like a double unrequited love 😔 okay bye lmk what you think, thank you! 😘
Also, lmk what you think about jk in this poll!
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no reposting, copying, or translating my work– © kookslastbutton
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sescoups · 4 days
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favorite coworker - choi vernon
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masterlist
word count: ~5.3k (i'm so sorry)
summary: vernon is your favorite. he just gets you. of course you can't resist him - not that you would ever want to.
a/n: this is definitely NOT proofread, and i'm sorry. idk i just have the fattest crush on vernon, honestly i can't be held accountable
18+, MDNI!!! warnings under the cut <3
warnings: oral (m. receiving), making out, creepy old man (he doesn't do anything, he's just a creep), mention of vomit, lmk if i missed anything! <3
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“Wait so hang on, you mean to tell me you’ve never what..? Gone down on a guy?”
“Oh yell it out, why don’t you,” you groan, smacking your forehead into the counter. Thank fuck you just cleaned it.
Vernon is your coworker at the record store in the middle of the city. He’s super chill, does what he’s supposed to but doesn’t stress out or get pissy if you’re having a bad day and work slowly. He’s great. He’s just… a bit unaware of his surroundings, a lot of the time. You’re lucky only two people are in the store at the moment, or you would have simply passed away.
“Sorry, sorry,” he says, holding up his hands in a gesture of peace. “I just kinda can’t believe it? I mean, you’ve had sex for sure, right?”
“Yes, Vernon.” You roll your eyes and glare at an old man who is shamelessly looking you up and down. “I’ve had sex before. Just not a lot, I guess. And why is it so hard to believe?”
Had he been looking at your face, your raised eyebrow might have tipped him off to the fact that he should drop the topic and back off. Unfortunately, in typical Vernon fashion, he was doodling nonsense on a notepad, so he missed it completely.
“Well I mean, you’re hot,” he said before finally looking up at you. He started tapping his pen against the counter, leaning his weight on one hand against the counter. “You’re also pretty open about your life in general, so I just figured two plus two equals one, you know.”
“What the fu- Vernon. Think about what you just said.”
“Oh fuck. Yeah I deserved to fail math in high school.”
You burst into laughter at his words. This is exactly why you love Vernon, and why he’s your favorite coworker. You’re laughing so hard you barely manage to greet the new customer who just entered the store. Your coworker is smiling, satisfied with his ability to make you laugh.
The old man who is still eyeing you, now with extra focus on your boobs, comes up to the register just as you manage to sober up from your laughing fit. You clear your throat and turn to face him, giving him a tiny smile in the spirit of customer service. Apparently a mistake.
“Excuse me, sweetheart,” he starts, running his tongue over his front teeth in what you suspect is supposed to be a seduction attempt. “Would you mind maybe showing me some of the records you have in the back?”
The smile leaves your face immediately, and you’re about to absolutely emaciate him when Vernon cuts in to make sure you do not lose your job over some smarmy geezer.
“She cannot, sir. It’s store policy. Soz.”
You hold your snort in, but barely. The old man huffs and glares at the man next to you, crossing his arms over his chest. Honestly, you’re curious at this point. You’ve never seen Vernon handle confrontation - again, very chill dude - but you also know he is very protective over his friends.
“I wasn’t talking to you,” the old man says with an eye roll. “I was talking to the pretty young lady.”
His smile sends a shiver down your spine, and you take a deep breath. The old man watches your boobs rise and fall. Seriously, fuck this guy. You force the customer service smile back on your face because you actually really like and need this job, and decide this sack of shit isn’t worth it.
“He’s right, sir. It’s against store policy, and I’m currently on register duty. If there is a specific record you wish to see, we can look it up in the system.”
“I’ll keep looking for a while… in case you change your mind.”
The way he winks at you makes your blood boil, and it’s a wonder your teeth don’t crack from the pressure of your jaw. The man walks away, and so does Vernon. He can’t really kick the guy out unless he does something physical, so you don’t know what he’s trying to do. Soon, though, your confusion melts into amusement and glee as you watch your coworker follow the man around the store, loudly dissing his music taste whenever he picks up a record. He keeps walking just a little bit too close for comfort, and after about three minutes, the man gives up.
You take huge pleasure in the way the man skulks out, hands in his pockets and back hunched over as if he’s trying to get away from something - or someone. Returning to the register, Vernon grins to himself and resumes his doodling without a word. You shake your head in amazement before going to help the other two customers in the store.
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The next time you’re working with Vernon, you have the closing shift. Usually only one person is supposed to stay back after closing and clean up, but you just received a large shipment of vinyls that need to be sorted and placed into protective sleeves, so the two of you are working overtime together.
It’s a pretty slow shift, and the two of you pass the time by playing music for one another and guessing the artist and the title. You’re much better at it than he is, but only because you’re good at memorizing things; he has a far more varied music taste than you, and would easily have won had he remembered more than two song names and five artists. As per the terms of the game, the loser has to go out to get the dinner you preordered from a restaurant down the street. It’s not far, but it’s raining, so you’re glad to be exempt.
While your colleague is gone, you close out the register and sweep the floor so you only have the vinyl sorting left after you’ve eaten. The break room smells like wet dog and Doritos, so you bring two chairs out together with the foldable table that you’re going to use to sort the vinyls. Since no one is in the store anyway, you can people watch through the windows while you eat.
Vernon comes back in just as you finish setting up, soaking wet from the pouring rain. You coo at him when he shivers, and he shoots you a playful glare. He ends up holding his glare for all of two seconds before a wide smile stretches across his face.
“I left an extra shirt here at some point, do you think it smells like teenage boy?”
You escape the break room with two plates and some utensils in hand, laughing at his question and probably unfortunate fate.
“Because of the proximity to the break room? Probably. That shit is unavoidable.”
He grimaces before taking his jacket off, hanging it on a hook behind the register. He disappears to change while you plate the food, humming to yourself. You try not to think about how he’s probably half naked right now, and turn your attention to the fact that he most likely will smell atrocious to keep your head on straight.
You do love Vernon. He’s a great coworker, obviously, and he’s a great friend too, but that’s not really the full extent of it. You’ve been battling your crush on him for months now, because it’s pretty clear that he isn’t interested in you. Besides, if you ever did date, things would get awkward at work if you broke up. No, he is one of those people who should stay firmly at arm’s length. Unfortunately.
Your thoughts are interrupted by a loud bang, making you jump a good foot in the air.
“What the fuck, Nonnie?”
“Sorry,” he grimaces, checking that the door he managed to fling directly into the wall hadn’t done any damage. “I tripped.”
“Only you, Vern,” you sigh. “Well, food is ready to go. Let’s eat!”
The meal, consisting of some kimchi jjigae, rice and side salad, passes by in relative silence. You occasionally hum in content, and Vernon often slurps his jjigae really loudly which prompts you to giggle. He always looks glad to have amused you, and you need to look away often in order to control your emotions.
“Dude,” he groans after his third serving, “I’m so fucking full.”
“I’m not the one who got an order for five people, genius,” you groan back, your own stomach feeling like a water balloon. “So good though.”
“So good,” he nods earnestly.
You can’t stand to look at him like this; you need something to do with your hands. So you stand up and stretch, which actually does help the food settle in your stomach a bit. Your hair, tied in a bun to avoid getting any food in it, comes down to release some of the pressure on your scalp, and then you feel ready to get started.
“Take all the time you need, man, but I’m gonna start on the first box. I want to get home before dawn, if I can.”
He flashes you a thumbs up and slumps against the table to enter into a food coma. You scoff at him and shake your head before clearing the dishes from the table. Thank God you have a dishwasher in the break room.
You bring out the first box and start sorting it, referencing the list you have as you go to take inventory. It’s repetitive work, but it’s kind of soothing, too. You do your best to make the plastic of the vinyl coverings crinkle as little as possible, wanting Vernon to rest for as long as he needs to. Three servings of kimchi jjigae would make anyone drowsy.
The first sign that he is still alive comes ten minutes later when he starts drumming a random rhythm on the table. You snort when you recognize the rhythm, pausing with a vinyl halfway into its covering.
“You can’t drum the melody to Dun Dun Dance, Vernon.”
“I can do whatever I want,” he protests weakly, cheek still pressed firmly against the table surface. “But nicely done. What about this one?” He drums out another rhythm, and now that you know it’s a melody he’s following, you recognize it quicker.
“That’s Candy by H.O.T.”
“Nice.”
“You gonna work or rest, bud?”
Vernon whines at your words and rolls his head to rest his forehead against the table instead. You wait patiently as he gathers the strength to sit up properly and kick a box of vinyls over to him when he seems more alive.
“Life isn’t fair,” he pouts, “I just did so much work eating all that food, and now I gotta do more?”
“It’s like that,” you agree absentmindedly, marking off a stack of vinyls on your list. “Can you turn on some music, please? The silence is creepy.”
He nods and connects his phone to the store speakers, choosing the playlist the two of you created together on a similar night of overtime. After that, the two of you slip into a rhythm together, unpacking vinyls, checking the list, and then putting them into a protective sleeve. It’s mostly silent aside from the music, and sometimes Vernon drums along to the beat on the table, but it’s comfortable. You kind of don’t mind spending a few hours like this.
When you’re two thirds through the stack of boxes, you both decide to take a break. Your saint of a colleague brews some coffee, and you hop onto the checkout counter to browse through your phone while your brain cells take a well-deserved rest.
“Bless you,” you say as you accept a mug full of coffee. “We’re making pretty good time today, eh?”
“Yeah,” he agrees, taking a sip and wincing at the scalding temperature. “We haven’t really been talking, so.”
“That jjigae really took you out, huh?”
“Oh yeah.”
You grin at him and blow gently over your coffee. It’s still too hot to drink, as evidenced by the steam rising from it, but the smell alone is kind of waking you up. Vernon grabs your attention by clearing his throat gently, and you turn to look at him. He’s fidgeting a bit with a pen left on the counter close to your thigh.
“I, uh… I wanted to say I’m sorry about that dude the other day. The creepy one. I probably should have kicked him out, but I didn’t know if I could…”
Your heart melted a little in your chest. It was obvious he had been carrying this around with him, mulling it over and worrying about it. About you. It was endearing, and dangerous for your heart. You bit your lip and placed your coffee mug on the counter next to you.
“It’s okay,” you say earnestly. “He sucked, and I was uncomfortable, but you still made him leave. I didn’t feel like I was in danger or anything, so don’t worry about it.”
“I just feel like it’s partially my fault, for kind of yelling about the fact that you’ve never sucked a dick before.” You’re incredibly grateful that you weren’t drinking coffee at that moment, because you definitely would have spat it out all over the floor. His bluntness never ceased to surprise you. It was unbearably adorable. “I should be more aware of my surroundings, especially when talking about something sensitive like that.”
“Well,” you start, pausing thoughtfully. “I don’t really think that man would have acted differently either way, to be honest with you. Men like that are just… like that. I also don’t really care who knows I’ve never given a blowjob before. It doesn’t matter, at the end of the day. I haven’t done it because I haven’t slept with anyone who’s dick I wanted to suck, and that’s all. I just wish I knew how sometimes, you know?”
He shuffles his weight around at your words, shifting from foot to foot. He’s still fumbling with the pen on the counter, but now his fingers are clumsier than usual. You glance up at his face only to find him staring into empty space in front of him. You figure you made him uncomfortable with your oversharing.
“Sorry. That was TMI.”
“No,” he answers quickly. “We share everything. I told you when I threw up on Seungkwan’s lap and cried because I felt bad, didn’t I?” You smile at the reminder and nod. He finally meets your eyes again. “I was just thinking, you know.”
“What about?”
Vernon’s mind is the most fascinating thing to you. The way he thinks is so out of the box and different, and so beautiful. He has shown you the lyrics he writes for his friend Jihoon sometimes, and they’re so poetic you find yourself turning them over in your mind for days afterward. And the best part about it is that he always answers you when you ask what’s going on inside his head. He grants you access to his thoughts and feelings, and it’s the greatest gift you’ve ever received.
“Well. I don’t know if this is going to come off as creepy or not,” he warns, “but I was thinking like… Maybe you should just get it over with.”
“Get what over with?” Your eyebrow rises as you ask the question, and his furrow in response.
“I just mean that you could know how to give a good blowjob, if you wanted to. You could just… pick someone to sleep with. And ask them to teach you. You know?”
“Nonnie,” you start, and your bewildered tone makes him shrink a little. “You really believe the best of people, don’t you?”
“Well- I mean yes, but I didn't mean you should just sleep with anyone. You could just pick someone you already know.”
His words give you pause. You have plenty of friends in possession of a penis, but the thought of sleeping with most of them feels kinda gross. The one exception is… Well, Vernon. And you sincerely doubt that he is offering himself up. So you do what you always do and make a joke to force your mind away from the thought of sucking on your friend’s dick until he cums for you.
“What, are you offering?”
“I mean, yeah,” he shrugs.
You stop breathing. He is actually, genuinely offering to teach you how to suck dick. More specifically, his dick. The one that has been the star of many of your more illicit fantasies. You want to say yes so badly, want to finally get the experience of being something more to him, but you also don’t want to get ahead of yourself. But…
The room is silent while you’re thinking. You feel his eyes on the side of your face, feel the way he’s cataloging every emotion that overtakes your features, and you swallow harshly. Your heart is beating out of your chest and your hands are shaking, and your brain is running a mile a minute with no end in sight.
Then Vernon places his hand on your thigh. His touch is warm but light, ready to pull away as soon as you want him to, but it’s enough to bring your soul back into your body and get a grasp on your thoughts and feelings. You bite your lower lip and breathe in deeply before letting it go. Yeah, you’re doing this.
“I uh, I’m going to need some guidance,” you say, and you almost miss the way your friend’s eyes widen at your words.
“O-Of course. And if you want to stop at any time, just like, tell me, yeah?”
You smile at the comfort his words bring you. “Yeah.”
There is silence once again, but this one is heavy with a different kind of tension. You both know what’s happening, but you don’t know what your next move should be. Technically, you should be working and saving any… other activities for your own free time, but you don’t think waiting is something you’re capable of at this point.
He is the one to make the first move, placing his half-empty mug on the counter and placing himself between your legs. His hands find a place on your waist, bunching the fabric of your shirt slightly. Sitting on the counter means you’re a little bit taller than he is, but you really don’t mind it. He holds your gaze for a few seconds before his left hand lifts to cup your face.
“Are you okay with kissing?” His voice is a bit deeper than normal, and you would be lying if you said it didn’t make heat pool between your legs. “I understand if not, but-”
You interrupt him with a gentle kiss. His lips are pillowy against yours, smooth and plump. You thank your past self for bullying him into using chapstick, because you can honestly say that this might be your favorite kiss ever.
Vernon’s hand moves from your jaw to rake through your hair, and you moan a little when his fingers catch a little in the back. He responds by stepping even closer to you and sliding his entire arm around your back, your chest pressing against his deliciously. The only thought going through your mind is the fact that you are kissing your favorite coworker, and how you really, really want to bury his cock in your throat.
He chases after you when you pull away slightly to catch your breath, and you don’t even mind that the oxygen deprivation is making you dizzy. You slump against him a little when he tugs on your hair again, and you move to return the favor. As soon as you pull on the hair at the back of his neck, he forces himself to pull away and gulp down some air.
His eyes are glazed over, his lips slick with a mix of your and his saliva, and his chest is rising and falling where it’s pressed against yours. It's painfully attractive. He rasps out a quiet groan and leans his forehead against yours. You love the feeling of his harsh breaths hitting your face and answer back with your own.
You feel like you’re in a bubble, because the world around you feels muted and time feels like it has stopped moving. You wouldn’t be surprised if the earth had stopped spinning.
“Sorry,” he breathes. He buries his face in the crook of your neck and inhales your scent. “I just really wanted to do that.”
“Stop apologizing,” you respond, bringing your hand onto his head to scratch at his scalp. “I liked it. Maybe a bit too much.”
Your words bring a whine out of Vernon, and he squeezes you tighter. You’re still on top of the counter, but you can feel his bulge against the inside of your thigh. It twitches against you every time you tug at the ends of his hair, and it makes you smile.
One of your hands snakes down and cups him through his jeans. He reacts strongly despite the thick material separating you. His willingness to show you how good you make him feel make you fall for him all over again. As if he wasn’t already perfect enough.
“Y/N,” he gulps when you move your hand against him, “we’re taking this at your pace, and I can go as slowly as you want to, but I think I might go insane if I don’t get these pants off.”
You giggle breathlessly as you pull away from him, and he forces himself to take a step back from you. You lean back on your hands, your knees still spread from where he was standing previously. He’s distracted for a few seconds before he finally remembers to unbutton his jeans and tugs them down his legs.
The bulge had been apparent through the jeans, but you can truly tell how hard he is when they come off. The way he twitches in his boxers is so obvious you almost feel bad for him. You decide it’s time you follow through and receive your lesson.
You hop off the counter and slide onto your knees in front of him. It’s unfair how attractive he is even from this angle, you think, and slide your hands up his thighs. You’ve given handjobs before, so it’s not exactly your first time touching a dick, but the goal is different now. This time, your hands are just the warmup and not the main event. You’re just hoping you can bring him some sort of pleasure in spite of your inexperience.
“Tell me how to start,” you whisper up at him. He blinks a few times at the sight of you before sucking in a deep breath.
“Yeah,” he rasps. His throat is already dry with anticipation. “I uh, I mean everyone is different when it comes to this stuff, so uh-”
“Just teach me what you like, Nonnie.” Your hands are massaging his thighs, nails digging into his skin every now and then. Whenever they do, you can feel him shudder.
“O-Oh, okay,” he breathes, sounding broken already. “I prefer skipping the handjob first, I guess. I really l-like the feeling of licking, especially at the tip, and uh-” He is becoming redder by the second. “One step at a time. Uhm, start by removing my boxers.”
You nod obediently and slide your hands up to his lower tummy, watching the expressions of pleasure as they take over his face. You assume you will never get to do this again, so you do your best to burn it all into your mind for later use on lonely nights spent with your vibrator. He shudders again when your nails scratch his skin lightly. Your fingers curl around the hem of his underwear and tug.
His cock is beautiful. It’s pretty long, curving slightly towards his stomach, and the tip of it is a perfect shade of peach. Your mouth waters at the thought of getting to taste it, and you eye the drop of precum spilling from the tip. You gently shuffle closer, but he stops you.
“Sorry, you’re fine, I just need something to lean against,” he explains when you look at him in fear of having done something wrong. He maneuvers you both so that he’s leaning against the counter you were sitting on not five minutes ago, and you’re in front of him.
“What now, Nonnie?” you ask, his eyes shutting and chest expanding to accommodate a deep breath.
“You should probably just uh, stroke me a few times first. Then uhm, then you can do whatever you want.” You blink at him a few times, trying to indicate that he’s supposed to be teaching you how to do this. For once, he gets the hint. “Like I said, I uh, like licking. When you take me in you just have to make sure not to like, bite me. Other than that, you can take it at your own speed and depth - for your comfort, of course, but I’m also not picky.”
You admire the flush decorating his cheeks and neck. He looks so good like this, towering over you and looking at you like you hold the answer to his ultimate pleasure. You try to convince yourself that you do, that you will be able to listen and follow his guidance well enough that this will feel good for him. You decide that you will.
Raising your right hand, you grip him tightly in your fist. It makes him suck in a breath, and you feel the muscles in his thighs tense up. You pump him a few times, going slow and using his precum as lube. It’s not enough, of course, but you will move on soon.
“Fuck…” he heaves, leaning back onto the counter even more. He looks into your eyes and swears again. “Please, sweetheart, as soon as you’re ready, I-I want-”
You cut him off by pressing your tongue against the head of his dick. The flavor is salty and a little bit bitter, but it tastes like heaven. Your eyes briefly slip closed as you continue kitten-licking at his slit, and he lets out a winy moan. You open your eyes and look at him, only to find him with his head tilted back to look at the ceiling.
“How is this?” you pause to ask, continuing before he’s had time to answer.
“Good, baby,” Vernon answers through his labored breathing. “So, so good. Keep going, you’re doing great.”
The praise bolsters your confidence, and you give a long lick from his base to his tip. The motion makes him moan again, so you repeat it a few more times. In no time at all, his cock is covered in a mixture of your saliva and his own precum. You decide it’s time to try and take him in your mouth - both because you’ve teased him enough, but you’re also too impatient to wait anymore.
His tip breaches the heat of your mouth , and you find you have to open your jaw quite a bit to accommodate him. A punched out groan leaves him, and one of his hands comes down to tangle in your hair. When a strand of it falls in front of your face, he gathers your hair into a makeshift ponytail at the back of your head.
You love the weight of him on your tongue, and dare to sink down a bit lower. He hits the top of your mouth. You gag around him, and he gently pulls you off of him to check on you.
“You okay? You don’t have to keep going,” he reminds you. It only serves to make you more determined to make him cum down the back of your throat.
“What can I do better?” you ask while stroking him in your hand. You still want to improve.
“Honestly?” he wheezes, his hips jumping of their own accord. “You’re doing great.” You glare a bit at him, and he smiles down at you apologetically. “Sorry. But you are doing great. Maybe try sucking a bit more? Not just placing me in your mouth.”
You nod and sink right back down on him. His noises of pleasure are never-ending, and they only increase in volume as well as frequency once you properly suck around him. You bob up and down on him, his hand clenching in your hair as he’s doing his best not to fuck your throat. You’re making it pretty hard.
“Please, baby, I’m gonna fucking- Where do you want me to cum?”
His voice is hoarse and strained, and his grip on your hair has grown so tight it’s stinging your scalp. You savor the pain and rub your thighs together, mewling around him. You grip his ass and push deeper to signal for him to cum in your mouth, and it’s not a second too soon because he immediately spills his seed into you.
Vernon cums so much that some spills out onto your chin, but you diligently swallow what you can. He tries to keep his eyes on you, but his vision quite literally whites out as he reaches his high, so his eyes screw shut without his permission. You, on the other hand, couldn’t tear your gaze from him if you tried. He’s beautiful when he cums, his eyebrows scrunched in what almost looks like pain and his jaw slack in awe. His thighs tremble, and you’re glad he’s leaning against the counter so he doesn’t collapse onto the floor.
“Fuck, how are you so good at this,” he heaves out when his vision returns. You just smirk up at him, some of his cum still covering your chin and lips.
“I had a good teacher,” you tease back. Your voice is raspy after bobbing on his cock, and he finds it painfully attractive.
He notices the way you clench your thighs together and realizes you’re still on the floor. He’s quick to bend down and help you to your feet. As soon as you’re in front of him, he’s kissing you. He doesn’t care about the cum transferring from your chin to his, nor the fact that his softening dick is still out in the open; all he can think about is that he wants to pay you back for what you just did for him.
“Nonnie,” you breathe between kisses, and instead of pulling away it makes him kiss you harder, faster, deeper. He loves when you call him that. He reluctantly pulls away when you push gently against his chest, though. “We should finish the-”
“I need to eat you out, baby. Please, please let me.” His interruption surprises you, and so does his suggestion. He must see your confusion, because he quickly clears things up for you. “I want to, because I like you so much. I promise to ask you to be my girlfriend after this, but please, let me eat you out first.”
“Okay, but Nonnie-” you say, but he interrupts you with a passionate kiss as he mumbles thanks against your lips. “Nonnie.” He sighs and pulls away, resting his forehead against yours. He closes his eyes to stop himself from jumping you again, and you smile. “I’ll say yes right now. I want to be your girlfriend. Is that okay?”
He kisses you so deeply you lose track of where he starts and you end, but you’re just so glad to be kissing him again you probably couldn’t have figured it out anyway. You don’t talk much more that evening, and you definitely don’t get home before midnight, but at least you go home and fall into bed together. Maybe his inattentiveness was a blessing, after all.
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masterlist
a/n: don't forget to like and reblog if you enjoyed this post! <3
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klovesyall · 2 months
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Oh my. My brain is full of ideas, but I can't write.
Spencer, but it's his first time showering with his gf? Either she casually invites him to join her, or maybe she's also a member of the BAU and was injured and needs some assistance?
AN: oh absolutely hun. I wasn’t sure if you wanted nsfw or fluff so I went with fluff for a safe option. Also I’m so sorry if this lowkey sucks. This is definitely my first rodeo with writing and I know it’s not perfect but I hope you kinda like it?
OK MORE RECENT AN: im sooooooooooooooooooooooo sorry this took so long. I don’t even have an excuse. And I’m so sorry because this is ASS. But I feel bad not giving you anything so here you go
Warnings: Fluff, swearing? , talk of nakedness and stuff idk
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Spencer had been extra protective of you ever since you got hurt. He didn’t want you to lift a single finger, even though you were perfectly capable. He made you food , carried your bags, hell- he even offered to carry you if your crutches got too annoying. All of this to say , he was willing to do anything to make you comfortable.
“Spence, I’m gonna take a shower.” You say with your back turned as you grab some pajamas out of the dresser drawer.
“What?” His voice was filled with concern, as it often was. When you turned around toward him he had the same amount of concern written on his face
“I have to shower Spencer, my hair is so dirty it looks wet.” You haven’t washed your hair in a few days, relying on dry shampoo and braided hair to get you by.
Spencer was thinking for a moment , you could tell by the way his brow furrowed slightly. He finally answers “Let me help you.”
You were slightly taken aback by his response. Spencer wasn’t usually confident enough to initiate or out right suggest anything intimate. And taking a shower together was definitely intimate. Not to say you were opposed to the idea though
“Are You Sure Spence? You do know I shower naked right?” Your tone was some what joking but also kind of not. Regardless you hear the little chuckle you love so much
“Yes I know. I dont want you to fall and get hurt any more than you already are. If you don’t want me to thats fine I just-“
You cut him off
“That would be really helpful, thank you.”
You see Spencer’s worry ease from his face and it’s replaced with a little curve of his lip
You give him a little smile before returning to grabbing your pajamas and walking to the bathroom. Spencer graciously follows you inside, locking the door behind him. When you turn to the counter , Spencer is quick to slip past you, turning on the shower for you.
“Do you take your showers warm or hot.” Spencer asks as if it’s so incredibly normal
“Uh hot I guess? It’s ok I can-“
He stops you when you begin to walk over
“Let me Take Care of you. Please.”
You sigh “you know I can do it myself.”
Spencer takes a step toward you, placing his hands on either side of your shoulders
“I know, but I don’t want to risk anything. You do so much for me and you deserve to be helped as well, especially when your injured. So please let me do this for you.” His voice is soft but you can tell how strongly he feels about this
“Ok, I’ll let you handle it.” I say
He smiles “can I take your clothes off?”
I Nod “You don’t have to ask.” You said that a lot, and it didn’t matter how many times you did. Spencer always asked
He grabbed the bottom of your shirt and you raised your arms. He pulls the shirt off your body and folds it before placing it on the counter. He does the same with your pants. Your standing only in your underwear now
“Do you want me to do the rest?” You ask
He shakes his head “turn around for me.”
You turn so your back is facing him and he unclasps your bra, sliding it down your arms until it hits the floor. He hooks a finger under your underwear on either side of you, pulling them down and helping you step out of them. He smiles when he meets your eyes again
“See something you like pretty boy?” You raise an eye brow in a teasing manner.
“Always.” He replies before walking you over to the shower. Holding his hand, you slowly take a step inside until your under the water. Once inside , Spencer takes a step back and sheds his clothes as well before joining you in the shower.
Spencer had ensured that you had a shower bench installed into the bathroom you shared when you moved in together. He said it was for safety reasons but, you still wondered if it might be for other things.
“Sit.” Spencer says, leading you to the bench.
When you sit down he detaches the shower head and wets your hair. When it’s what he considers wet enough, he lathers shampoo into his hands and begins to massage it into your scalp.
This man has very capable hands, many uses. And washing your hair just got added to the list of them. You close your eyes from a moment letting out a contended sigh
“Feel good sweetheart?” Spencer asks gently
“Mhm, definitely.” You reply, barely opening your eyes.
Spencer rinses out the shampoo and conditions your hair. He helps you wash off and when you finally stand , you wrap your arms around his neck. His hands lace around your waist
“Thank you Spencer, you’re an angel.” You say pressing little kisses to his jaw. You can see the blush creeping on Spencer’s face.
“You’re welcome, I’m always happy to help you.” He says peering down at you.
The two of you exit the shower. Wrapping towels around your selves and getting dressed- well Spencer refuses to let you dress your self so he helps you. He even blow drys your hair for you because he knows you don’t like going to bed with it wet.
————————————————————
You lay in bed on your side facing him as he looks back at you. You reach out and brush a strand of his hair out of his eyes.
“You should stay home tomorrow.” Spencer says breaking the silence.
“Absolutely not. I’m perfectly capable of going into work. Plus Hotch would have my head if I didn’t go.” You say and Spencer sighs
“I don’t like the idea of you out on the field” he says once again with concern
“You’ll be with me. I’ll be fine.”
He sits up “I don’t want you to be fine I want you to be healthy.”
You sit up and scoot close to him “Spencer I’m going to work. If it makes you feel better I’ll stay back with Penelope and help her.”
Spencer relaxes a little “yea. Ok that makes me feel better. But don’t go doing anything stupid. That means no trying to entertain Penelope with” Spencer throws up air quotes “crutch tricks”
You groan and lay back down “whatever you say.”
You can hear Spencer’s little laugh as he turns off the lamp.
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hyunniesgirl · 3 months
Text
Bad intentions | Part 2
Pairing: Han Jisung x afab!reader
Summary: you thought you could turn Han Jisung into the perfect boyfriend material so you can get revenge on your cheating ex. Little did you know that you would end up getting much more than just a guy to show off.
Words count: 13,668(Idk don't look at me)
This content is +18 ONLY, minors do NOT interact!
It's advised to read part 1 before this one for context and better understanding of the plot.
Part 1 | Love is a mess: series masterlist
Warnings: dry humping, handjob, fingering, cursing, pet names(baby, pretty), oral(f, m receiving), unprotected piv(for the love of god don't do this irl), jealousy, angst, fluff
A/N: here I am again, procrastinating what I should be doing just so I can take this fic out of my head. Hope you guys like it ❣️
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Seunghoon was never one to do acts of service, he would tell you he loved you and even though you didn't always believe that, that's what he offered and you just took it. You always thought that that was everything you deserved, better a bit of affection than no affection at all.
So you didn't expect to find Jisung waiting for you the next morning. He's outside of his car, scrolling on his phone, leaning against the vehicle.
You close your front door slowly, like he can just disappear if you make any hasty movements. As if Jisung can feel your presence, he lifts his eyes looking in your direction, smiling and waving to you.
“Fancy seeing you here”, he jokes, tilting his head when you come closer.
“In front of my… house?” You ask, smiling and he shrugs, embarrassed. He didn't really think it through, he just got into his car and when he realized, he was in front of your house.
“I just thought we could go to school together”, he kicks a rock on the ground, losing confidence, “but it's okay if you don't want to”
You step closer to him, taking his hand into yours and interlacing your fingers. That sudden electricity from before running through all your body the moment you touch him.
“Maybe you can convince me”, you tilt your head, biting on your lower lip while looking at his lips, looking extremely kissable.
“How?” His head snaps to look at you, following your gaze and understanding what you're suggesting. He feels his ears warm, wrapping his arms around your waist and pulling your body closer to his.
Jisung kisses you, the warmth of his touch spreading all over your body. His tongue brushes against your lips and one of his hands slides through your hair, pulling it lightly.
You open your mouth slowly, too intoxicated by his scent to think clearly, putting your hands on his hips, sliding up just to find his deliciously small waist that you could never notice with the baggy clothes he wears.
“Well, you're full of surprises, aren't you?” You say when you two finally part the kiss.
He frowns, looking at you breathless.
“Shall we?” You ask, pointing at the car and he nods, turning around and opening the door for you. Before going in, you look at him, a playful smile on your lips. “You'll get me to do a lot of things if you keep using these means of persuasion”
For the first time in your life you don't want the spotlight to be on you, you feel uncomfortable being the center of attention. You know exactly why people are staring when you arrive at school with Jisung.
You wish you were being judged by showing up with a new guy barely a month after breaking up with Seunghoon, but that's not it.
People are looking at Jisung, you know they are. You don't mind the snickering comments or the idiotic jokes directed at you, but you don't want him to go through that.
“Should we have lunch together?” He asks you, pulling you out of your thoughts.
“Actually, I don't know if I'll have lunch today”, you lie. If you think logically, you should try to stay away from him at school. Maybe people won't target him if you do that.
“Do you want me to take you home after school, then?” He asks, frowning, finding your sudden change of attitude strange.
“There's no need, I have practice”, you avoid his eyes, ashamed of yourself.
You're an idiot, you shouldn't have made such hasty decisions. You should have thought about how mean people would be to him if you brought him into the spotlight with you.
Jisung feels his stomach sinking in and he can't help but take a look at himself, he never really cared about the way he dressed. He wears anything that he finds that's clean, not worried about looking good or fashionable.
He has always been the smart guy, the one who has no care in the world other than the things he has his eyes set on and that has always been his studies and music.
His family was shocked when he chose a career in music since he could do anything else. He has the brains to choose any path that had success guaranteed but he chose something as uncertain as a career in the music industry.
He did end up being successful anyway, after meeting his friends and forming 3racha, it didn't take long for them to land a contract with a big label. The three of them stayed in college though, each for a different reason.
Looking at you though, you're very different from him. You worry about your image and what people think about you. If he looks at you, from your hair to your shoes everything is matched to perfection. You're always nice with everyone, even with the people you know talk shit about you and you still keep your grades up.
So why, someone who worries so much about her image would want to be seen with someone like him?
He never worried about his clothes or being popular, but now? He's very worried about those exact things. If you end up dating him, how will people perceive you? You're the center of attention so the person who's dating you, automatically will be in that same center.
Jisung decides to wait for you after practice, he knows you told him not to, but he knows that if he stays in his head, he'll go crazy – thinking about all the worst case scenarios where you're going to dump his ass anytime now just because he's not popular enough.
You smile when you see him but it dies down a few seconds later, when a group of girls from your cheer squad walks past you, laughing about something.
“Hey”, he says when you get closer.
“You didn't have to pick me up”, you say awkwardly, hoping he didn't hear what those girls said.
“Yeah, but I thought you would be too tired to walk back home-”
“It's just a short walk”, you tell him, pressing your lips in a thin line. He stares at you for a moment, frowning, debating in his mind if he should say something about your strange behavior and knowing that if he doesn't, it will eat him alive.
“Y/N?” He starts, voice too serious, “are you embarrassed because of me?”
Jisung really doesn't want to hear your answer, it would crush him if you said yes but he has the slight hope that you will deny it.
“No! No, absolutely not”, you shake your head frantically. He feels a huge weight being lifted off his back but at the same time, he still doesn't understand why you were acting like that.
“But then why-” you cut him mid sentence, taking a deep breath. Bold of you to assume that a person as smart as him wouldn't notice how you were acting.
“People can be really mean”, you tell him, “I'm afraid you're going to go through a hard time because of me”, you pout, feeling like crying. What if he agrees with you? What if he doesn't think you're worth the trouble?
“Why would you think that?” He searches for your hands, holding them and pulling you closer.
“If you date me, people are going to talk about you and I don't want you to hear the same things I have to”, you tell him, honestly.
Popularity is great, you love the attention but it has its downsides. The amount of times you had to listen to people talking shit about you in the restroom, when they didn't know you were there, is wild. You lost count of how many times you walked in on a conversation of someone talking something bad about you and you had to pretend like you didn't know.
You don't want Jisung to experience that, he's invisible now and he enjoys that, it's not fair that you would take him out of his comfort zone just to date you.
“What about you?” He asks, making you look at him with a frown. “You don't care that I don't know how to dress and that I’m basically invisible?”
You smile. Against your better judgment you don't, you really don't.
“I mean, if you could just let me take you to a hairstylist”, you say, lifting your hand to his face and brushing his hair to the side. “I really want to be able to look at your eyes while talking to you”, you joke.
“Ouch”, he puts his hand on his heart, pretending to be hurt. “I don't care what people say about me, okay? I only care about what you think”, he informs you, as if he didn't make that clear already.
“Are you sure?” You ask once more, giving him a chance to escape, even though you don't want him to.
“I am”, he nods, pulling you even closer and wrapping his arm around your waist. “So, can I have lunch with you from now on? And take you to and back from school? Hm?”
You nod, smiling happily.
“I'd love that”
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You decide to let people talk, if Jisung doesn't care about it then neither will you, and let's say that after that conversation things just got hotter between you two.
Classrooms, cars, under the bleachers, the locker rooms, there's no place where your makeout sessions didn't reach. You just can't really behave yourself in his presence, when you two are alone you just have to touch each other and after that you just can't help what comes next.
Everyday. Before, between and after classes you're all over each other. You're covered in hickeys, your hair is always a mess and lipstick just won't last on your lips for long. Jisung is no better than you, the only difference is that he can hide the love bites more easily and his flustered face is less noticeable than yours.
You are both in his car trying to get to the restaurant before one of you yields and try to touch the other, when his phone rings.
“Hey”, he says, putting on speaker while he keeps driving.
“I’m sorry to call, I know you're on a date”, you hear Chan's tired voice on the other side of the line, “but my laptop died for whatever reason and the song we prepared to send tomorrow morning was there, I didn't have time to make a backup”, he sighs.
“We lost everything?” Han asks, panic in his voice.
“No, we have the unfinished version on Changbin's laptop but we lost what we worked on yesterday”, Chan explains and Han nods, even though his friend can't see him.
“Okay, yeah, I can go there and-”, he stops mid sentence, looking at you puzzled. “You are out of the city, right?” He asks Chan.
“Yes and Changbin has a test tomorrow, he won't be able to do it”
“Can I go to the studio with you?” You ask and Han nods, confused. “Then we are going to be there soon, Chan, don't worry”, you tell.
“Thank you”, Chan sighs, giving his goodbye and hanging up.
“Are you sure?” Jisung asks, watching you pick up your phone in your purse.
“Yeah”, you shrug, “we can have dinner in a fancy restaurant another time”, you say, calling the said restaurant so you can cancel your reservation.
Jisung watches you talking calmly with the restaurant, feeling grateful, you didn't have to be so understanding.
“Should we order some fried chicken?” You ask, after hanging up, “unfortunately they won't give us a refund”
“It's okay”, Jisung chuckles, “and I'd love fried chicken”
“To tell you the truth, fancy stuff is not my cup of tea”, you tell him, “I much rather have some chicken and beer”
“Well, my lady”, he smiles at you, “luckily for you I know a great place that sell exactly those things”
You watch Jisung work, he looks so professional while doing whatever he's doing. He's focused, a few strands of hair falling slightly over his eyes. His hands work fast, mixing, going back and forth and fixing different parts.
You sit there on the couch, waiting for him to finish. One, two, three hours go by. It's one in the morning when he sighs, closing the laptop and turning his chair towards you.
“Are you done?” You ask, hopeful and Jisung nods, standing up and walking to the couch, sitting comfortably on your side, resting his head on the back of the couch. Eyes closed trying to rest his eyes. “Did you make a backup?” You tease, watching him open his eyes slowly, turning his head to look at you.
“I did”, he chuckles, “and sent the backup to Changbin and Chan too”
“That's good”, you tell him, snuggling closer.
“Sorry that we didn't have a proper date”, he says.
“Don't be sorry. I think this is great”, you shrug, “I had good food and got to see you looking hot while working, that sounds like a win win for me”
Jisung laughs, shaking his head to your antics.
“Still, if there's anything I can do to make it up to you, just let me know”, he tells you.
That's when you realize Han Jisung doesn't know you at all, this man shouldn't give someone like you an opening like that.
“Oh, in that case”, you bite your bottom lip. “I have some ideas of how you can make it up to me”
You lean closer to him, face centimeters away from his.
“You could start with this”, you give him a peck on the lips, “and then you can go down here”, you kiss his jaw, going down to his neck, “then you can use your imagination here”, you suck on the skin that already has purple ish marks fading away.
“Is that right?” Eyes darkening, his hands land on your hips, pulling you closer.
“Mmn”, you agree with a shit eating grin on your face.
“And what about this?” He grabs your hips, bringing you to his lap. Your cheeks grow hotter, he's so much more bold than when you started seeing each other. “Do you like it?” He tilts his head, brows arched and a smirk on his lips.
“Where did the guy that freaked out about the thought of receiving nudes go?” You pout, you hate that he can so easily get you flustered.
Jisung throws his head back, chuckling while looking down on you. He tightens the grip on your hips, pressing your body closer to him. You can feel something hard beneath you and that doesn't help you at all, your face growing even more red.
“I had to change my approach when I realized you like to tease”, he brings his face closer to yours, “but you have no experience with being teased”, he smiles, seeing your breathing halt. You're cute.
He kisses you, wrapping an arm around your waist to pull you closer, rubbing your aching core on his hard on. You gasp, feeling the sudden stimulation but he keeps his lips on you, tongue brushing on yours slowly making you dizzy.
Jisung slides his hands to your thighs, pulling your skirt up so he can grab the flesh of your ass and squeeze it.
“Hannie”, you whisper, feeling his cock pressing against your clothed clit, making the knot in your lower stomach grow.
“Hm?” He asks, Jisung just loves when you use that nickname to call him. “Are you enjoying yourself, pretty?” He teases and you nod, moving your hips on your own, chasing your high.
You look at Jisung, brushing the strands of hair out of his eyes, biting on your lower lip before kissing him. You look so majestic riding him, he has no words so he tries to show you how turned on he is by kissing you with all the lust he has in himself. Hands on your hips forcing you closer to him, stimulating you more.
“I-I'm c-close”, you struggle to say, feeling all the heat spreading all over your body as you bend down and bite his shoulder to contain the loud moan you let out.
Jisung wraps his arms around your waist, snuggling his face into your neck and leaving kisses on your sweaty skin. You're kind of embarrassed, you didn't think you would be doing something like that in a place like here.
“Next time let me hear you, yeah?” He teases and you groan, slapping his arm.
“No, what if someone heard me?” You protest and he smiles, brushing your hair behind your ear.
“There's no one here at this hour”, he reassures you, “but anyone that ever heard you moaning should thank you, baby”, he gives a peck on your lips, biting your bottom lip.
“You didn't finish, right?” You sigh, closing your eyes to the feeling of his cock still hard as a rock beneath you.
“Don't worry about it”, he shrugs, “I got to make you cum, that's enough for me”, he smirks, too proud of himself but you have your own pride, no way you're going to let him see you like this and not do the same.
“Can I touch you?” You ask, getting out of his lap and comfortable by his side on the couch, waiting for his answer so you can unzip his pants.
“You don't need to feel obligated”, he says but clears his throat when you glare at him, “yeah, you can”
You waste no time, working on opening his pants and pulling his underwear down to see his painfully hard cock, he's bigger than you thought he would be. You feel your core throbbing once more, just thinking about how you're going to make him fit inside you, that won't be easy but you're sure you can manage.
You grab his length with your hand, making him jump and whine. ‘What a beautiful sound’, you think.
Your hand starts moving up and down and you watch as Jisung throws his head back, mouth open, low moans coming out and eyes closed as he approaches his orgasm. He looks so pretty like that, so you get closer, leaning over and kissing him. Jisung groans, thrusting his hips against your fist, making even more lewd noises while you just watch him, face so close you can feel his breath hitting on your skin.
When his movements start faltering, he can feel his release and in a moment later his hot cum is spreading all over your hand.
“Fuck”, he says, ears turning red instantly when he comes down of his high. “I usually take longer”, he explains nervously, making you chuckle.
“I didn't say anything”, you shrug, finding his anxious eyes too cute.
“I'm serious”, he pouts, zipping his pants back on.
“Me too”, you chuckle, “you took way longer than most guys do, there was a hot girl humping on you and you didn't cum, that's a feat in itself”, you tell him and he bites back a smile, you're such an idiot. But cute, definitely cute.
Jisung watches as you get up, looking for the bathroom so you can clean yourself and he finds himself smiling alone, thinking of you. What are you doing to him? And why does he not mind it at all?
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It doesn't take long for Seunghoon to find out who's the guy you're going out with and he doesn't waste any time to come and find you, being the asshole he is.
You're having lunch with Mina and Miyeon when you feel that familiar arm on top of your shoulders, his scent is the same, so there's no mistaking it.
“You didn't tell me the guy you're seeing is Han Jisung”, Seunghoon’s snarky voice feels like a knife being thrown at you. You grab his arm, tossing away from you, his touch makes you sick.
“Didn't think I owed you a full report of who I'm dating now”, you say back, rolling your eyes.
“Well, I mean”, he sneers, “I thought your standards were higher”
You feel your face turning red, not from embarrassment, no, it's anger, the only reaction this man can get out of you now.
“Of course my standards are higher”, you take a deep breath, knowing very well that if you punch him in the face right now, he's going to win. “That's why I went for someone much better than you”, you roll your eyes.
“Please, in what world that guy is better than me?” He laughs and you can't help but chuckle.
“I sure could tell you all the things he's better than you, but I don't think people really need to know about how disappointing you are in bed and outside of it too”, you finish, standing up. “Ah”, you turn to him before you can walk away, “don't come looking for me again, Jisung can get very jealous”
Walking home you're foaming at the mouth, who does he think he is to talk about Jisung in that way? Oh, you really wish you could have beat the hell out of him, fucking bastard. Well, fuck him, you're better off without that prick and you hope you don't have to think about him ever again.
As soon as you get home, you hear voices inside your house coming to the conclusion that your parents are home, as if things couldn't get worse.
You take a deep breath before turning the knob to open the door, meeting uninterested looks when you walk by the kitchen.
“Why did you arrive so late?” Your mom asks, not really looking at you now, much more interested in her phone.
“I had practice”, you say, opening the fridge to grab an apple. You're hungry but if you have to eat with them you're sure you're gonna have indigestion.
“Shouldn't you be studying?” Your father accuses you. “Your brother is the best student in every one of his classes”
“Well if I had that many expensive tutors I would be the best too”, you mumble, receiving a raised brow from the older man. “I don't have any exams for the time being”, you sigh, excusing yourself but before you can cross the door out of the kitchen you hear your mom's voice.
“We are going to travel again tomorrow, we just came home to get some things”, you nod, that's nothing new.
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Jisung is walking back and forth in the living room of his apartment, waiting anxiously for Chan and Changbin to be back from their morning workout session.
You didn't see it, but Jisung was there at the dining hall. He froze dead in his tracks the moment he saw Seunghoon sitting with you, all the worst case scenarios coming to his mind. Did you go back to him? You wouldn't, right?
It's true that you and Jisung don't have anything official yet, but it looked like you liked him, so even though his brain was having a field day telling him you never once enjoyed being with him, it's hard for him to actually believe you would put him aside just like that.
He can hear everything, Seunghoon isn't trying to be quiet and he's saying the exact things you were afraid Jisung would hear. He doesn't care about people talking shit about him, the only thing he cares about is what you think about him and the way you just straight away told off your ex’s makes Jisung proud of you, proud of being with you.
However, even though you don't mind all the talks and mean comments, he does. He doesn't want to harm your reputation or more importantly he doesn't want to hurt you. So Jisung made the decision to become someone better, he wants to be better for you. So when his friends open the front door, carrying their gym bags, they bump into a restless Jisung.
“Can you help me?” He asks, making Changbin and Chan look at each other and nod, sitting down with their youngest to talk.
It's been years since the three met each other and every once in a while they tried to convince Jisung to accept their advice so he could be more popular.
It was exhausting, really, Jisung only cared about music and finishing college. His routine was basically going from the studio to university to home. Work, study and sleep, those are the things he usually cares about. So it was nice seeing him going out, meeting you. He's been happier recently and it's nice for them to see him trying to improve himself for you even though they both doubted your intentions at first.
“What do you have in mind?” Chan asks.
“She- hm… she said my hair is too long?” He says, a bit embarrassed.
“We've been telling you this for months”, Changbin whines.
“Well, I think I should get a haircut and buy some new clothes”, Jisung huffs.
“Shouldn't you ask y/n to help you out with that? I'm sure she would love that”, Chan grins.
“I want to surprise her”, the younger one smiles sheepishly, scratching the back of his neck.
“Okay, then”, Chan nods, “give us time to take a shower-”
“And eat”, Changbin adds.
“And eat, then we can go”, Chan laughs, standing up and walking to his room.
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Jisung didn't talk much with you for two straight days, he only answered the texts you sent him and every time you asked if he wanted to meet, he said he had other plans. You started to worry that maybe word got out about your little scene with Seunghoon that day, maybe Jisung got the wrong idea about you socializing with your ex.
You didn't think you would miss him so much, but you kept checking your phone to see if he had texted you and waited until late at night for a call but it never came.
Maybe Jisung could see right through you, under this facade you put on. Maybe he doesn't want someone as lonely as you, someone who needs his warmth to keep going.
You try distracting yourself with anything, staying after practice to train a new routine. After killing some time, you store the things you used for practice and go out.
When you're closing the gymnasium, you feel a familiar presence close to you, making you turn around with a businesslike smile on your face.
“How can I help… you?” You choke on the air you just breathe. “Jisung?” You ask, speechless.
“The one and only”, he chuckles seeing your shocked face.
“What happened?” You even struggle to speak.
He's the same, but different? His hair is shorter, fixed in a nice hairstyle and his clothes are fitting him perfectly, like they were custom made.
“Do you not like it?” He asks, worried, hands patting his body trying to understand where it went wrong.
“No, no!” You blurt out, fast. “I like it, you look really good”, you don't actually have words to describe how delicious he looks, he already had you hot and bothered before, what are you going to do now? It's impossible to not want to jump his bones right this instant.
“Then?” He waits for you to continue, taking a step towards you, making you instantly take a step back. You're not sure if you'll be able to hold yourself back if he gets too close and you don't want the first time you fuck to be in the school's locker room.
“Why did you change?” You ask, trying to think more clearly.
“I'm trying to become boyfriend material for you”, he grabs your hand, holding it with his. “I even made social media accounts”, he smiles.
“But you were already perfect”, you whisper it slowly, brows knit together. Did you make him feel like he wasn't?
He sighs.
“I heard what your ex said that day”, he says, biting his bottom lip. “I don't want you going out of your way to shield me from mean comments, I want people to envy you for dating me, the same as there are dozens of guys that hate me because I got you”, he tilts his head, waiting for you to process what he just said.
“As long as you're not uncomfortable”, you say, trying to find any sign of hesitancy on his face.
“Not at all”, he tells you, “Chan and Binnie helped me buy nice clothes that are comfortable. Also, if I become more popular, It'll help 3racha”, he shrugs.
“Okay”, you nod nervously, not really knowing what to do next.
“Are you sure I look good?” He asks, playfully, seeing the way you're avoiding his eyes. Jisung takes a step closer, making you take a step back once more just for you to bump into the closed doors of the gymnasium. “Oh? Why do I get the feeling that you are thinking about running away?”
“Pff, me?” You scoff, “of course not”, you shake your head frantically.
He tsks, reaching for your waist and wrapping his arm around you.
“You know, a strong denial is like an affirmation in some cases.” Jisung says, bending down to your height, brushing his lips on yours but before you can lose yourself on his hold, you lift your hands pressing them against his chest and pushing him away.
“Can- can you not?” You huff, you can't believe you're even stuttering, you almost gave in. Almost.
You ended up giving in and it didn't take him much to convince you. Jisung was driving and you were anxiously waiting to arrive home, a cold shower and maybe a sex toy would do the trick. Everything was alright until he put his hand on your knee, sliding it up and down on your thigh. Did he get a new personality together with the makeover? He knows exactly what he's doing because he has that damn smirk plastered on his lips.
You didn't change from your cheer uniform since you had no energy and just wanted to get home to anxiously wait for Jisung's contact and now you regret it. It feels a thousand times more painful to have his hands touching the bare skin of your thighs. Each time that his hand comes up it gets closer to your core like he's testing the waters to see where you're willing to let him go.
What he still doesn't seem to know is that you're more than willing to let him go all the way and as soon as his hand gets too close to your throbbing core, you hold your breath as if that could do anything to help.
Jisung plays with the hem of your safety shorts without a care in the world, like he doesn't have you all turned on and your panties are not soaked.
“Stop the car”, you say through gritted teeth.
He glances at you before parking, making you want to rip that shit eating grin off of his face with a punch.
“What's wrong?” He asks cynically, unfastening his seatbelt to turn to you, his hand still caressing your thigh.
“You don't want to go there, Han Jisung”, you tell him, grabbing his arm to try and force his hand to stop touching you.
“Don't I?” He smiles, biting his bottom lip. You look so sexy saying his full name like that and he gets the urge to make you moan it. “I think I do”
“I hate you”, you groan, reaching to grab his collar and pulling him to you, making your mouths crash in a hungry kiss. You missed having him so close to you, his free hand cups your face and Jisung deepens the kiss, feeling your tongue caressing his so eagerly.
His other hand is working its way into your shorts, he's desperate to feel you on his fingers and as soon as he manages to get his hands under your panties, he can already feel your wetness leaking out of your sweet pussy.
“Shit”, he groans, disconnecting his lips from yours. “Are you usually this wet? Or is it just for me?” He asks shamelessly, making your whole face turn red.
You keep silent, trying to breathe normally again. It's embarrassing, how can someone provoke this kind of reaction out of you like this?
He chuckles, a dark deep chuckle while he slides his hand to your head to pull your hair.
“Cat got your tongue, pretty?” He asks, kissing you on the cheek at the same time as he places two fingers inside you, making you whimper. He pouts, tilting his head. “I'm sorry, you are so wet I thought you could handle two”
“Oh”, you feel your breathing out of pace and Jisung starts moving his fingers in and out of you. “J-jisung”, you moan, feeling his thumb circling around your clit. His fingers work fast, in and out of your hole, feeling you clenching around them. You're so tight, he can't wait to feel you around his cock.
His hair is all disheveled, pretty pink lips half open watching you becoming undone right in front of him. You want to stop him, you don't want to give him the satisfaction of ruining you so easily, but he's so handsome, his eyes are looking at you so deeply just waiting for you to come on his fingers.
The moment your whole body trembles, you close your eyes to the pleasure spreading all over you. You glare at him, panting and dizzy, seeing him take his fingers out of you and taking them straight to his mouth, licking them like a starved man.
“You taste as sweet as you look”, he tells you, fastening his seatbelt and starting the car again, driving back to the road like nothing happened.
“What about you?” You ask, seeing his obvious hard on.
“I think we had enough fun for today”, he glances at you, winking. It makes you sink in your seat, feeling your face turning red and the butterflies in your stomach. Jisung hopes you didn't realize that he would cum with a simple touch of yours, if he had your delicate hand around him one more time he wouldn't be able to last long, even less if he could feel your sweet lips on his cock, so he chose to avoid that embarrassment.
You feel excited from the moment you wake up and as a person who doesn't like waking up early that's a very difficult thing to achieve. But when you opened your eyes, groaning and exhausted, you picked up your phone to turn off the alarm just to find a few texts from Jisung saying he would be coming to pick you up.
That definitely left you excited, so you jumped out of the bed, grabbing a towel and running to the bathroom to take a quick shower. After finishing your bath, you get your hair done and choose the cutest clothes you have in your wardrobe.
The moment you go out, you see Jisung waiting for you outside of your house. He's looking good, leaning on his car with his hands in his pockets while he waits for you to walk to him.
“It should be illegal for someone to look this nice at this hour”, you try teasing him, to see if you can make him flustered.
“I was going to say the same”, he answers, checking you out, shamelessly and you are the one with a red face in the end, so you just give him a peck on the lips, trying to hide your embarrassment while getting into the car.
The ride to school is calm, you're nervously anticipating how people are going to act when they see you two, when they see Jisung.
Everyone stops to stare at you, at the same time as you want to hide from the prying eyes, you understand. Honestly, if you saw Han Jisung walking around looking like that you would stop to stare at him too.
He holds your hand, interlacing your fingers and leading you inside, a huge grin on his face, proud that he got the reaction he wanted. This was his plan, he wants you to show him off, he wants you to feel proud to be by his side and more than anything, he wants everyone to know you're his now.
He leaves you in your classroom, giving you a goodbye kiss and promising to find you later so you can have lunch together.
“Who was that?” Mina asks, mouth agape.
“That's Jisung”, you tell her proudly.
“Well, how did you work your magic so fast?” Miyeon asks.
“Will you believe it if I tell you I didn't do a thing?”
“I guess just dating you is enough to change a person”, Mina jokes, making you roll your eyes.
“Should I take that as a compliment?” You ask playfully and she chuckles.
“I guess you'll win the bet more easily than I thought”, she says, sighing, pretending to be disappointed.
“Actually, about that I-”, you fidget with your hands, it's not easy for you to give up and after what you just went through with Seunghoon you surely don't want to admit that what you have with Jisung is more than you could anticipate, it's something special. “I want to call it off, the bet”, you finally say, making your friends exchange glances, confused. “I don't want to play games with him”, you finish, sitting by Miyeon's side.
“Well, I didn't think you would give up so easily”, Mina laughs, “you're such a softie, y/n”
You smile, remembering about Jisung's hands on you earlier this morning, trying not to blush too much.
“I'll win the captain title again fair and square”, you tell Mina, stretching a hand to her so she can shake it. “And about Seunghoon, I don't really care about him anymore”, you shrug.
Mina shakes your hand back proudly, she can see something different in you now and she's happy that maybe you're seeing in yourself all the potential she's been trying to convince you that you have for all these years.
You feel a little bit jealous. Now Jisung can barely walk more than three meters without someone greeting or hitting on him, you're pouting during lunch, playing with your food while he goes on and on about 3racha’s new track.
“Are you listening?” He asks, tilting his head while looking at you.
“I am”, you nod, even though you could barely understand what he was saying.
“You're acting weird again”, he sighs, lifting his hand to your chin and pulling your face so you can look at him. “Talk to me”
“It's nothing”, you are the one sighing now, “I'm just being stupid”
“Tell me then, I'll be the judge of that”, he pushes.
“It's just-” you can't help but sulk while talking, “Those girls were clearly hitting on you earlier and you didn't do anything about it”, you whine, “I'm being stupid because I'm not even sure what I wanted you to do in that situation, even so, I'm still feeling bad and angry”
Jisung can't hold back the big smile that grows on his lips, he leans closer to your face, supporting his elbow on the table.
“Is my baby jealous?”, he asks playfully, with a cute voice, making you pout even harder, crossing your arms.
“Stop that, I'm not”, you say, feeling your cheeks burning because of the pet name.
“If you're not jealous, then can I go and get their numbers?” He tests, making you glare at him. Jisung laughs, embracing you in a hug and kissing the top of your head. “In all seriousness, I didn't even notice they were hitting on me. I was so focused on just answering their questions so I could get the hell out of their sight, I'm sorry I made you feel bad”, he clarifies.
You sigh, wrapping your arms around him and relaxing in his embrace.
“Don't apologize, I was being ridiculous”
Jisung breaths out, pulling away from your embrace and cupping your face with his hands. He stares at you for a few seconds, trying to use the right words to speak to you.
“You should definitely stop invalidating what you feel. What you feel is not ridiculous or stupid”, he gives a peck on your lips, brushing his nose on yours. “You can always tell me about your feelings, I'll always listen to you. So don't say things like that, alright?”
You want to cry, you want to smile, you want to hug him and never let go. So you snuggle in his embrace, nodding and mumbling about how he shouldn't get too close to other girls, making him smile while he kisses the top of your head. What did you do to deserve someone like him?
After finishing your lunch you two get up, carrying your trays back to their place and talking about what ice cream you should buy since you have a free afternoon. However, when you cross the doors to the dining hall, you bump directly into Seunghoon, causing a minute of awkward silence between you three. No apologies, just your ex staring at Jisung like he's trying to win a staring contest or something like that.
“Long time no see, y/n”, Seunghoon smiles to you, as if you didn't basically tell him to fuck off a few weeks ago. “I see you're accompanied, I'm Seunghoon, a friend of y/n”, he stretches his hand to shake Jisung's.
“I know who you are”, Jisung says, shaking the other man's hand. The hostility in the atmosphere is palpable but before you can excuse yourself, Seunghoon's voice is heard once more.
“Y/N promised that she would go on a double date with me and my girlfriend”, he recalls, “now that we are acquainted I feel like we can set a date”, he smiles and if you didn't know him you'd think he's genuinely interested in having a double date with friends.
“Sure, just let me know the day and time and we'll be there”, Jisung answers before you have the chance to deny.
You watch as Seunghoon chuckles, nodding and giving his goodbye. Your stomach sinking in, you have a bad feeling about this.
“What was that about?” You ask Jisung, brows knit together in confusion.
“What was what?”
“Don't play with me, Han Jisung”, you roll your eyes, crossing your arms in front of your chest and he sighs, biting on his bottom lip.
Jisung may or may not have regretted it the moment he accepted without checking with you first, but your ex just makes him so mad. The fact that he's not at least a bit apologetic about what he did to you just doesn't sit right with Jisung, how could he break your heart and nonchalantly show up in front of you asking for a double date with the girl he cheated on you with. Fuck him.
“I'm sorry”, Jisung sighs, sulking. “I should have checked with you but I just felt so angry”
You stare at him for a moment, sighing. That sucks, it seems you can't stay mad at him for too long.
“It's fine, I'm sure he would bother us until we accepted it”, you say, grabbing his arm to force him to carry on your walk. “Shall we go shopping for some couple outfits today?” You smile at him, that's going to be his punishment.
Or at least it should have been, so why does Jisung look so excited with every piece of clothing you try on? He looks very happy to buy things for him but not nearly as much as when he's watching you.
You ended up buying a couple's pajamas and for the date — that Seunghoon didn't lose any time scheduling for Friday — you got a bracelet with a pendant that resembles a ferris wheel, the place you two kissed for the first time.
“Shall we go to the amusement park again?” He asks, raising your hand high enough for him to look at the bracelet.
He sees your eyes shine to that simple mention and he smiles when you nod frantically.
“There were so many rides we didn't get to go because it was too crowded”, you say excitedly, “We have to go on the roller coaster”
“We do?” He chuckles nervously, “that thing is kinda scary”
“Of course we do!” You stop in your tracks, making him look at you. “I'll hold your hand the whole time, so you have nothing to worry about.”
You say, confidently and oddly enough, Jisung feels really reassured with your words.
“Oh, you're my knight in shining armor”, he sighs dramatically. “What would I do without you? Hm?”
He uses the hand he's holding to pull you closer, wrapping his arm around your waist and pressing your bodies against each other. Jisung gives you a peck on the lips, smiling when he sees you blushing.
“You better always keep me close to you”, you tell him, avoiding his eyes. “So I can protect you”
“Mmn”, he agrees, snuggling his face in the crock of your neck, “I'll keep you always in arm's length”
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The dreadful Friday arrives too fast, when neither you or Jisung wanted it to come. You try not to think too much about the way you're dressed, you don't want your ex to think you dressed up for him. Jisung on the other hand, wants to look his best so Seunghoon can swallow back all the things he said about you, knowing that you did in fact find someone better.
“Ready?” He asks you when you get into the car.
“Can't we just stand them up?” You ask, hopeful, while fastening your seatbelt.
“Let's just stay for thirty minutes, then I can pretend I received a call and we have to go”, he grabs your hand and kisses it, “how does that sound?”
“Sounds good”, you nod, smiling at him. But that damn feeling that something just isn't right keeps bothering you.
Jisung drives slowly, trying to avoid the unavoidable. It should be fine, nothing is gonna go wrong, it's just anxiety trying to make him paranoid.
Seunghoon chose a fancy restaurant, Jisung is only used to going to places like that when he meets someone from the label, together with Chan and Changbin. He doesn't really like fancy places, he wanted to take you there on a date because he thought that was something you would like but in the end you're not into that either.
“I should probably tell you right now that this restaurant is where Seunghoon asked me to be his girlfriend”, you tell Jisung as soon as he parks in front of the place your double date is supposed to happen.
“What?” Jisung asks, confused.
“I didn't want to believe before we actually arrived but I knew I recognized that address when you showed it to me”, you explain. “I think he just wants to brag, he'll try to get under your skin for sure. Maybe he'll try to talk about the time we dated, that would be a dick move since his girlfriend is gonna be there but he is a dick so I don't expect less from him”, you start to ramble nervously.
“It's okay, you're with me now”, he reassures you one more time, grabbing your hand and squeezing it, “we are gonna go there, hear whatever he has to say and in thirty minutes we are out and we can even go to a real date just the two of us”, Jisung tilts his head waiting for your confirmation and you nod, leaning closer and kissing him.
“That sounds great, you are great”, you tell him
Awkward, stifling, suffocating. Those are the words that better describe how the dinner began on that night. Seunghoon was late but his girlfriend was already there so you had to awkwardly sit there with the girl your ex boyfriend cheated on you with. You are a good person and you don't want to cause a scene, especially because you don't really care about your ex anymore so you feel a bit grateful to this girl who took that bomb away from you.
“I liked your stunt on the last game”, she says, sheepishly while picking on her nails.
“Ah, yes. We worked for three months to come up with that one”, you answer, sipping on your cup of water and cursing Seunghoon in your mind. Where the hell is he?
Except that when Seunghoon waltzed inside the restaurant, you knew exactly why he was late. The look of utter disappointment on his face told you everything you needed to know, he wanted you two to fight over him. You wanna laugh. Did he really expect to come in late just to find his ex and current girlfriend grabbing each other by the hair or yelling at each other? What a fucking loser.
He probably didn't expect to see Jisung's arms wrapped around your waist, leaning so close to you or the whispers and giggles that were never common in your relationship with him.
“Where have you been?” His girlfriend asks while he sits down but he doesn't even look at her, eyes fixed on you and Jisung.
“Something happened”, he brushes off, vaguely. “Let's order?”
You and Jisung exchange confused looks, nodding to him.
“Oh, this is the place where we started dating, right?” Seunghoon asks, after the waiter takes your order, pretending like he didn't know about it when he set the date there.
“Yeah”, you sigh, eyeing Jisung, already knowing where your ex was trying to go with that.
“You loved the pasta here, why didn't you order that?” He asks and you glance at his girlfriend who's glaring at him.
“I didn't like the pasta, you did”, you sigh, feeling Jisung's pulling you a little closer to him, making you look at him to see the man smiling at you. You release the air you didn't even notice you were holding and you realize how stiff your whole body is, why does Seunghoon make you so nervous? It didn't feel this way the other day when you met him by yourself. It's just that you have the feeling that he has an ulterior motive to this dinner, other than just bragging about his new relationship.
He looks mad at your answer, even more mad because of how close Jisung is to you. You used to be like that with him, grasping at the slightest bit of affection he would give you. He thought you would come back to him eventually, Seunghoon thought you would forgive him, would depend on him once more so why didn't you? Why don't you need him anymore?
“I heard something funny”, he grabs everyone's attention suddenly. “Heard that you're only dating him because of a bet?” He sneers.
Your heart stops at that moment.
“What?” You ask, immediately turning to Jisung who looks frozen, staring at Seunghoon.
“Yeah, one of my friends heard the funniest conversation in one of his classes”, he laughs, “I’m sure you already know about it, right?” He asks Jisung, raising a brow in amusement.
Jisung starts to shake, he can't look at you, not right now. But he also can't let Seunghoon win, it would be too humiliating for the both of you.
“Yeah, I knew about it”, he lies, feeling the least bit satisfied with the annoyed groan Seunghoon lets out. “I think you should start treating your girl better rather than taking care of y/n’s relationship”, he finishes, standing up. “I lost my appetite, let's go”, Jisung tells you, stretching his hand so you can hold it but his eyes don't look into yours.
Jisung doesn't say a word to you until he parks in front of your house and you were too scared to start the conversation but when he kept quiet even after ten minutes, only staring at the wheel in his hands, you couldn't take it anymore.
“I know I should have told you before, I-”
“So he was telling the truth?” He looks at you for the first time in the last hour and you wish he didn't, the hurt in his eyes makes your chest feel like someone is squeezing your heart. “You are low”, he spits.
You feel tears brimming in your eyes, you know you deserve that but at the same time you could never have imagined him treating you this way.
“I'm sorry, I'm so sorry”, the tears start running down your face, “it started as a bet but I called it off, I swear” you try grabbing his hand so he can look at you but he snatches himself out of your grasp, crossing his arms in front of his chest and looking outside. He's afraid he'll cry if he looks at you, he's scared he'll give in if he so much as glances at you.
“I need to think”, it's the only thing he says.
“Jisung, please, hear me out”, you plead once more but he doesn't look at you.
“I don't want to hear anything right now”, he tells you, stretching his body over yours to open your door, waiting for you to get out.
You step out of the car, glancing at him over and over, expecting him to change his mind but he doesn't and you watch as the car disappears far away on the road.
You only let yourself cry after closing the door to your room, even though there's no one else home, you still feel like you need to lock yourself up so you can feel anything.
You're such an idiot, you should have told him about the bet but it was something so meaningless that it didn't even cross your mind that you should come clean to him, in your head everything that mattered was that you liked him and that you called the bet off but you didn't take into consideration that he would feel hurt about that and that's what hurts the most.
You always talk about how Seunghoon did bad things to you, that he didn't have any regard towards you, but did you have any towards Jisung? You waltzed into his life, put him in the spotlight and made him open himself to you, but you couldn't take the time to think about how hurt he would feel if he found out about the circumstances that made you like him in the first place.
You feel guilty about everything, you wish you could turn back time and change everything but you can't, you can't go back and you can't make it up to him, you have to wait for him to forgive you or in the worst case scenario, for him to dump you and that hurts too much.
Jisung knew someone like you wouldn't like someone like him just because you thought he was cute, he knew that there was something behind your sweet words and harsh moves on him but he chose to ignore every signal, every flag and every warning his mind pointed out because he wanted to believe you. Jisung wanted to let himself like you, he wanted to be the one to protect you, the one whom you would call on every minor inconvenience you run into but in the end, he should have been the one being protected from you.
He can't believe he let himself fall for you, why would you even like him? At least he thought you did, he thought you felt happy when you were with him. Lies, everything was a huge lie and he wants to punch himself for letting you make a fool out of him like that.
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A week goes by without news of Jisung, you see him walking through the school's corridors but you're too scared to approach him so you just watch as he keeps his routine everyday, like nothing happened, like you were never in his life.
Mina and Miyeon are making shifts to stay with you, if they don't you won't eat properly and you only sleep when the exhaustion is so much your body can't handle it anymore. You're scared he'll end things, but you're ready to beg if he tries too, you know Jisung is worth begging for.
On one of the rare moments you find yourself alone, you try to stay away from everyone else who are not your close friends. You're hiding in the building where Jisung has his classes, in hopes that you can see at least a glimpse of his face.
“Where have you been?” You hear an annoying voice right behind you, making you sigh while you turn around to see Seunghoon with his arms crossed in front of his chest. “You disappeared after our double date, did your new boyfriend really know about your bet?” He chuckles, making you want to punch him in the face. This is all his fault, if he didn't open his filthy mouth to say those things to Jisung you could have come clean to him and maybe this whole incident could have been avoided.
“Fuck you, Seunghoon”, you lose you composure, not really caring about winning this one, you just want to curse at him. “You cheated on me and then you tried to ruin my relationship and for what? Leave me the hell alone”, you spit out, walking past him but before you can go further you feel his grasp on your wrist, forcing you to turn around.
“You used to adore me, y/n, you were supposed to forget about everything and just stay with me so why did you rebel?”
“Oh, for fucks sake, I never ‘adored’ you, I just treated you like a good girlfriend should treat her boyfriend even though you have never done the same to me”, you try shaking your arm away from him but he doesn't let go. “I'm sick and tired of you, let go of me right now”, you pull your arm again with all your strength but he's grabbing you so strongly it's starting to hurt.
“Let's start over, yeah? I'll be good to you this time”, he asks, like he didn't hear anything you said.
“I have someone I really like now, nothing you do is gonna change that’, you groan, feeling your wrist sore. “I don't want to have anything to do with you anymore, just forget about me”
“Why do you always make everything so difficult-”, he tries to drag you away from the prying eyes who are starting to watch the scene unfolding, but you feel hands on your shoulders steadying you in place. Jisung walks in front of you, pushing Seunghoon and forcing him to let go of you.
“This doesn't concern you”, your ex says through gritted teeth.
“If it concerns y/n, it concerns me”, Jisung answers.
“Just because you got a little popular you think you can come up against me?” Seunghoon scoffs, coming closer to Jisung, challenging him.
“You're an idiot if you think you can just grab someone's girlfriend like that and don't get in trouble”, Jisung says, “if you have anything to discuss with her you can talk to me first”
“Don't be ridiculous, we can talk like grown ups. Right, y/n?” Seunghoon tries to come to you, but Jisung grabs him by the collar.
“Don't even fucking try”, Jisung glares at him, “if you get close to her one more time you're not gonna be able to play your next game”, he finishes, letting go of Seunghoon and pushing him away from you.
Seunghoon huffs and puffs but he knows he can't get into trouble if he wants to stay on the football team, so he curses you for the last time before turning around and walking away.
“Are you okay?” Jisung asks, looking around.
“Yeah, I'm fine”, you say, stepping closer to him but that's when you notice he's not looking at you and he's not even trying to hide that. “Thank you for helping me”, stepping back and stroking your wrist which hurts like hell. You want to cry but it's not from the pain coming from there, it's from the immeasurable ache coming from your chest.
“It's nothing”, he sighs, “try not to stay alone for now, you should stop coming here too”, he says, nodding to you before he's gone, walking away from you. Leaving you there, feeling empty.
“Should I be worried?” Chan asks Changbin, as soon as he sees the number of empty cans thrown in the center table in the living room. Jisung is seated on the floor looking at the TV but clearly not watching, he's just staring at it with an empty gaze.
“He's been like that since yesterday”, Changbin sighs, leaning over the kitchen counter while watching his younger friend open another can of beer. “You would have know if you had come back home”
“So, on the only night I sleep in my girlfriend's house, Han turns into an alcoholic?” Chan asks, ironically.
“He's been weird for a few days, I think he fought with y/n”, Changbin says, “I knew there was something going on.”
“Did you talk to him?”
“I tried, but he won't answer my questions or just sighs randomly while I'm talking”
“I'll try talking to him”, Chan says, looking at his friend who just shrugs, going back to wash the dishes.
The older one gets closer slowly, sitting on the couch and looking at Jisung for a moment, trying to see if he'll acknowledge his presence but it doesn't happen, the younger one doesn't even move.
“Hey, are you alright?” Chan asks, but there's no answer to his question. “Look, you know you can talk to us about anything, right?” He tries again, but still receives no answer, so he snatches Jisung's beer out of his hand, receiving a frustrated grunt from his friend.
“Give it back”, Jisung finally lets out.
“Talk to me”, Chan pleads.
“There's nothing to talk about”, Jisung shrugs. He should end things with you, even if it hurts, that's what he should do, right?
“Clearly there's something going on”, Chan says, “I won't leave you alone until you talk and you know I can be really annoying when I want to”
Jisung sighs, he knows that very well.
“She only asked me out because of a bet”, Jisung says, “y/n, I mean”
Chan sucks through his teeth, that's not a nice thing to do. But he can't really judge her when he did something similar when he started seeing his girlfriend, so he'll have to play devil's advocate this time.
“She ended things with you then? Because the bet is over or something like that?” He tries to push to know a bit more.
“No, her ex told me”, Jisung says, continuing when Chan frowns in confusion, “he was trying to get under my skin so we would fight”
“What about y/n?”
“She said she called it off and that she likes me”, he chuckles, “I don't believe her”
“Why not?” Chan asks, still confused. “Look, Han, what she did is shitty, okay? That's not open for discussion, but why are you doubting that she likes you? Shouldn't she use this opportunity to get out of this relationship now that you found out about the bet? Why would she lie about it? It doesn't make sense”, Chan points out.
“Why would someone like her like someone like me? I'm no one”, Jisung cries out, he knows Chan is right but he just can't let himself fall for your trap again, he can't handle it if you break his heart a second time.
“Now you're only letting your self doubt talk, what do you mean you're no one?” Chan sighs, “you're a great friend, you're smart and you're part of 3racha, you're talented as hell, Binnie and I would be nothing without you”, Chan says.
“Yeah, but she's so wonderful”, Jisung sighs, “she's kind and smart, she's funny and cute, she's the prettiest girl I have ever got to know”
“Did she ever tell you that you weren't those things too?”
“No”, the younger one looks at Chan with puppy eyes. “But still, why would she make a bet to date me if I wasn't a loser?”
“You should ask her that yourself”, Chan shrugs. “You know I did some questionable things to date my girl and I'm not proud of that, but I love her with all my heart. In the end, maybe what's important is what's on her heart right now and not when it started”
When you receive Jisung's text telling you he wants to meet up, you feel relieved. He's finally gonna talk to you but at the same time you feel anxious, he's very vague about what you're going to talk about so you can't ignore the possibility of him ending things.
You set the date in your house, you don't want to go to a public place just to end up a crying mess in front of everyone there. So you wait patiently until Jisung arrives, you bite all your nails, clean everything that can be cleaned even though it's already impeccable, you do anything that can ease your anxiety and make you less nervous.
Three knocks on the door make you jump from the couch, running to the entrance and opening the door in a fast swing.
You missed Jisung's face, his round cheeks look smaller than the last time you saw him and the eyebags under his eyes are huge. You are no different from that, you know you lost weight since your cheer uniform is big on you and you're breaking out in pimples because of the stress.
“Hi”, you say, awkwardly, giving space for him to enter.
“Hey”, he answers, waiting for you to guide him to wherever you want to talk.
“Do you want anything to drink?” Should you have offered? It's something you always do when you have guests.
“I'm good”, he answers again. “Can we cut to the chase?” He turns to you, arms crossed in front of his chest. That doesn't sound good, he doesn't look like he forgave you.
“Yeah”, you nod, bracing yourself for what's to come.
“Was everything a lie?” Jisung asks, biting his bottom lip. “Was anything you ever said real?”
“Yes it was, almost everything”, you take a step closer to him but he takes a step back, not ready to be so close to you yet. “Everything started as a bet, I wanted to make someone better than Seunghoon so I could make him jealous”, you sigh, feeling like an idiot.
“It was your idea?” He asks, staring at you.
“No, it was not my idea but I accepted it anyway”, you shake your head. “I know it's stupid, I know it is. But I fell in love with you and when I realized I didn't want to hurt you I called the bet off”, you explain.
“And when was that?”
“Three weeks ago”
He sighs, walking around for a minute, trying to think.
“How am I supposed to trust you now?” He pinches the bridge of his nose, trying to rationalize, trying to find an excuse for you, so he can forgive you.
“You are-”, a sob leaves your lips as soon as you start talking, tears running down your cheeks, you didn't even notice you were crying. “You're the first person who ever showed me what love really is”, you try to explain.
“So, do you like me or do you like the way I make you feel?” He whispers, eyes pleading for your answer to not destroy the little bit of hope he still has on you.
“I like y- I love you”, you try holding his hands once more. “I never thought I could love someone the way I love you, Jisung. I love everything about you, I sleep thinking about you and I wake up thinking about you. When I'm eating something nice I always ask myself if you already ate or if you would like what I'm having. When I'm out having fun I always wish you were there with me. Whenever we go to different classes I miss you immediately and I count every second so I can see you again”, you squeeze his hand. “I’m not asking for you to forgive me right now but please don't leave me, please stay with me”, you plead, feeling the tears running down your face.
Jisung's heart breaks from listening to your cries and sobs, he wants to save his pride and leave you for good. But he can't, Jisung is so in love with you right now that even the thought of staying away from you hurts much more than how he hurt because of what you did.
So he kisses you, his hands cup your face as usual, like nothing ever happened, like you never stayed apart. You missed his warmth, his lips, his hands on your body, everything.
“I missed you”, you tell him, wrapping your arms around his waist, ready to never let go again.
“I missed you too”, he sighs, “and I love you too”
“I'm so sorry, I swear I'll never do anything to hurt you ever again”, you grasp his shirt, bringing him even closer to you.
He knows he shouldn't feel reassured by your promise, how could he? But he does, he's just stupid but that's the effect you have on him.
You sit together and you tell him everything. Why you started a bet and why you chose him, when you started to like him and why you didn't tell him about the whole situation before.
You also talk about how terrible it was for the both of you to stay apart for so long, how you were ready to beg him to forgive you and that made him laugh, that's something he could never imagine you doing.
In the end you're both exhausted. Days without sleeping properly finally come back to bite the both of you on the ass so you invite Jisung to stay over, needing to stay close to him more than usual. You two stare at each other for a moment while laying down together, you can't even believe he forgave you and that he's there with you.
Jisung brushes off the strands of hair falling over your eyes, caressing your cheek before leaning closer to kiss you for the last time before the both of you give in to the deep slumber that's waiting.
“I love you”, he whispers when you close your eyes, making you smile like an idiot.
“I love you too”, you say back to him, letting yourself fall into unconsciousness.
When the light coming through the windows hits your eyes, you start waking up, slowly trying to look around just to see a sleepy Jisung with his arm around your waist, pulling you closer to him. He looks pretty even when he's sleeping, pouting a bit while he breathes quietly.
You can't hold yourself, so you lean closer giving a peck on his cheek.
“Hannie, wake up”, you whisper seeing his eyes flutter and his pout grows bigger.
“Just five more minutes”, he asks, pulling you even closer to him.
You sigh, deciding to let him sleep but when you try to get up the hold he has on your waist gets stronger.
“Where are you going?” He asks, opening his eyes.
“I was going to make some breakfast”, you say, watching him shaking his head and snuggling closer to you.
“No, I don't wanna. Stay here with me”, he whines.
“But what are we gonna eat?”
“We can order something”, he kisses your cheek, trailing kisses to your mouth and then to your neck, biting and sucking on the skin making you giggle and squirm in his embrace.
Jisung chuckles, kissing you. It's a slow, familiar kiss, one of his hands cupping your face and the other holds your waist pulling you closer. You put your hand on his hip, trying to find stability because you feel dizzy with his scent and his lips on you.
He parts the kiss so you both can breathe, but he keeps landing pecks on your jaw, neck and collarbone. His hands land on the rem of your shirt, he looks at you waiting for your permission and you nod, watching as he instantly pulls the piece of fabric out of you. Jisung bites his lower lip, staring down at your breasts, you look so beautiful he thinks that maybe he died and went to heaven.
The man leans closer, licking on your hard nipples, making you suck through your teeth, feeling his hot breath hit on your cold skin.
“Fuck”, you mutter when he bites lightly on the spot. Jisung chuckles, feeling your hands grabbing on his arms and your nails gripping on his skin. He keeps going down, leaving warm and wet kisses down your stomach, finding the waistband of your pajama pants and giving a kiss on both the sides of your hips before pulling the piece of clothing down.
He stares at your panties for a moment, it has bees printed on it and that makes him laugh.
“Do you like bees that much?” He asks, pulling the fabric down while he watches you squirm in embarrassment. You didn't think you'd have sex first thing in the morning so you didn't bother changing to something more sexy. You slap the palm of your hands in front of your eyes, covering your face. “You're cute”, he says, pulling your underwear down and kissing your right knee, then the left, “and so pretty.” You take one of your hands out of your eyes just to see Jisung staring right to your core. He's getting comfortable on the bed, positioning your legs over his shoulders while he grabs your hips with his hands to keep you in place.
Jisung doesn't lose time, kissing the inside of your thighs before licking your pussy, a long and wet strand that makes you immediately want to close your legs but his hands won't let you move. He slides one of his hands in between your legs, pressing a digit over your clit and then inserting the same finger inside you. Jisung sucks on your clit, circling the bud with his tongue while you stare at him, your bottom lip stuck between your teeth with so much strength it could draw blood.
“I can't get enough of your taste”, he says, using his free hand to clean around his mouth, licking his fingers soon after. “Can you handle another finger, baby?” He asks, cockily while you throw your head back, nodding frantically.
Jisung inserts a second finger, going back to suck on your sweet pussy, he feels like he could cum just by eating you out. His hip starts moving by itself while he searches for some friction, humping on the bed.
“Sungie”, you let out, hands landing on his head while you pull it closer to your cunt. “I'm close”, you squirm, feeling his tongue working faster and his fingers reaching places you never could. The knot on your stomach keeps growing until you feel like seeing stars, your legs shake uncontrollably and you moan loudly, eyes screwed shut.
Jisung groans, satisfied, it's so good to feel you cumming in his mouth, he could stay between your legs forever.
He trails kisses back to you, kissing your lips with such hunger you're not sure where it's coming from. You can feel your taste in his mouth and that only adds to the arousal you are still feeling even after an orgasm.
You look at his swollen lips and disheveled hair, thinking he's the prettiest man you have ever seen in your entire life. Your hands go to the rem of his shirt and in a swift move, you get it out of him, staring at his upper body like someone starved. You smirk, pushing him down so you can lean over him, doing the same as he did to you and trailing kisses down his jaw and neck, chest and stomach, until you see the path to your happiness. You pull his pants down, underwear going together, his hard cock springs hitting on his stomach, the head leaking with pre-cum, making you lick your lips, salivating just with the thought of all of that in your mouth.
You look at Jisung, he's waiting patiently for you to do something, anything and you like the feeling of having him in that place, wanting to be satisfied by you. You lean over, licking at his shaft from the base to the head before putting everything inside your mouth.
You can't feet all of him, so you grab the base stroking it up and down on the parts your mouth can't reach.
“Oh my god”, you hear his whimper, smiling to yourself because you're the one provoking that reaction out of him. You keep sucking on his cock, looking at him, Jisung has his head thrown back, lips slightly apart but he struggles to keep watching you, the image of you sucking on him is just too much for him, you're just too sexy, he can't handle it.
Jisung can feel his release approaching, he taps on your shoulder trying to catch your attention while you're so concentrated in sucking him off.
“I'm gonna cum”, he manages to let out but rather than stopping, you suck him even harder and stroking his cock with more resolution. In a moment you feel his hot cum spreading all over your mouth, making you smile while you swallow everything, opening your mouth and showing your tongue to him.
You come closer to him, kissing him the same as he did to you and he can feel his taste on your tongue.
“Fuck, you're so hot”, he says as soon as he splits the kiss between the two of you.
“It's all for you”, you whisper, leaning close to his ear. Jisung smiles, you're going to make him go insane.
“Do you have any condoms?” He asks, hastily, grabbing you by the hips and making you sit on his lap. You nod, leaning over the nightstand to open the drawer, showing him the package.
“But I'm on birth control”, you tell him, blushing. You never asked to be fucked raw before, you and your ex always used protection even though he protested a lot about it. “I'm clean, I got tested after I found out about the cheating”, you complete. It would be embarrassing if Jisung refused but it doesn't hurt to ask. All you want is to feel his cock inside you.
“A-are you sure?” He asks, correcting himself when you tilt your head in confusion, brows knit together. “I mean, are you sure about not using protection?” He completes and you nod.
“I trust you”, you kiss the tip of his nose, making his heart flutter. Just the thought of fucking you raw managed to make his semi erection turns into a full hard on in a second.
“Okay”, he nods, throwing the package away while he sits down. Jisung gives a few strokes on his cock before you position yourself over him, he puts the tip on your entrance holding his breath as soon as he feels your wet walls around him. “Shit, you're so tight”, his hands land on your hips, helping you go down on his length.
It hurts a little, he's bigger than average so the burning sensation is not surprising to you, even though you were well prepared it still is an intrusion.
“You're the one who's big”, you tell him, biting on his shoulder as soon as you manage to fit all of him inside of you. You stay still for a moment, catching your breath. When your hips start moving it feels so good, it's almost indescribable, the amount of places he can reach is ridiculous, you want to have his cock inside of you all day.
Your pussy is just so good, Jisung can't help gripping your hips more tightly, encouraging you to move faster. He thrusts his hips against you, spitting on his fingers and sliding his hand down to your clit, making circles there while he watches you riding him with your eyes closed shut, feeling your high closer and closer. He's no different, your flattering walls squeezing him are too much for him, he feels like he can cum anytime now.
Jisung kisses you, feeling you moan loudly against his lips, you grip his shoulder burying your nails on his skin and that only makes him crazier. He wraps his arm around your waist, pulling you closer to him, going deeper inside of you. You throw your head back, not able to hold in any longer. Your moans are music to Jisung's ears, he's sure he can cum just by hearing you so it's no surprise when he reaches his orgasm, shooting his seed inside you.
“Fuck”, he groans, movements faltering. You watch as he leans on you, head resting on your chest. That's what's necessary for you to cum and you are almost not able to breathe normally after the intensity of that orgasm.
Jisung helps you lie down on the bed, getting comfortable by your side while he snuggles himself close to you.
“I love you”, that's what he says, looking at you with loving eyes and there's nothing more running through his mind other than how much he loves you.
“I love you too”, you giggle happily, giving a peck on his lips. “I'll need a whole day to recover from this, though”, you tease.
“What do you mean? You better be ready for another round”, he answers, smiling and kissing you. You better brace yourself.
[End]
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A/N: If you like what I write please reblog or let me know in the comments, feedback gives me motivation to keep writing.
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