paper-thinprincess-blog

[paper-thinprincess-blog]

you think you’re faking this? ok. prove it.

delete tumblr. delete myfitnesspal. delete any and all calorie tracking apps. go into your kitchen. right now. get up and walk into your kitchen. now make a pot of pasta or spaghetti. or make a salad with chicken or a smoothie. or make a few eggs with some potatoes. or heat up the leftovers in the fridge. don’t count it. don’t measure it. don’t look up the calories. then sit down and eat the whole thing. don’t cut it up small, don’t wait until a certain time, don’t stare at it for forever before you eat it. cook it, put it on a plate, and eat it. maybe scroll through instagram or watch a tv show while you eat. like a post on your explore page about loving pizza without thinking of the calories or feeling fat. when you’re done eating, don’t go to the mirror, don’t go to the scale, don’t go to the toilet to throw up. then go on with your life without thinking about what you just ate or when you’ll eat next. now do that every time you first feel hungry every single day for the rest of your life.

if you can do that, fine. i’ll believe you. you’re “faking it”.

but if even one step of that sounds like your own personal hell, shut up because you’re absolutely not fake and your problems are beyond valid and you deserve to recover right now right where you are.

[paper-thinprincess-blog]

me: wants to be healthy and recovered 

also me: actively enjoys self destructive behaviour

[paper-thinprincess-blog]

All I want is to simultaneously be more and less than I am.

#ed #ed things #ednos #anamia #anarexyx #anorexii #not pro anything #mental health #mental illness

[paper-thinprincess-blog]

Sometimes the world is loud.

Sometimes it is all in my head.

#mental illness #mental health #ocd #scribble brain #intrusive thoughts #intrusive thinking #overwhelmed #ed things #ed art #ednos #ed #anamia #anarexyx #anorexii #not pro anything #my safe place

[paper-thinprincess-blog]

BED: We're going to binge!

Me: Wait... what? Why?

Ana: To get rid of all of your binge foods. Duh.

Me: We could just throw it all out...

BED: You'll feel guilty if you do. Remember? Good girls clean their plates! We don't waste food around here. Do you know how fortunate you are?!

Me: I'll feel guilty if I binge.

BED: But at least you'll feel guilty and full and warm...

Ana, as I am agreeing over a mouthful of peanut butter: Ugh.

Mia: Don't worry. I got this.

#anamia #anarexyx #anorexii #bullimia #binge eating #ednos #ed things #ed #eating disoder things #binge #ana #mia

[paper-thinprincess-blog]

Don't feed her. She is starving.

#anorexii #anamia #anarexyx #bullimia #not pro anything #eating disoder things #ed things #ednos #ed #ed art #dont feed her

[paper-thinprincess-blog]

yeah so, literally no food tastes as good as it feels to step on the scale and realize you’ve lost two pounds in one day.

[paper-thinprincess-blog]

Not wanting to eat in front of anyone because it makes you anxious

Vs

Only wanting to eat in front of people so your eating habits look normal

Vs

Wanting everyone to think you don’t eat anything

[paper-thinprincess-blog]

Everyday I wake up and weigh myself and then spend the rest of the day waiting to go to sleep so I can wake up and weigh myself again.

reblogging again bc so fucking true

[paper-thinprincess-blog]

November 17th

Input: 750

Output: 164

Total: 586

#ed things #ednos #ed #calories #caloric intake #caloric restriction

[paper-thinprincess-blog]

#ed things #ednos #ed #eating disoder things #anamia #anorexii #anarexyx #bullimia #not pro anything

[paper-thinprincess-blog]

not 👏 all 👏  people 👏 with 👏 eating 👏 disorders 👏 are 👏 underweight 👏

[paper-thinprincess-blog]

Self-care.

- Face mask ✅

- Long aromatherapy shower ✅

- Nails trimmed and painted ✅

- Hot tea and cozy blanket ✅

- Favorite show ✅

- Thinking this would be so much better 100 pounds lighter... ✅

Am I doing this right?

#anarexyx #anorexii #anamia #ed things #ednos #ed #eating disoder things

[paper-thinprincess-blog]

Ultimate Binge Prevention

10. Drink a glass of water : binging will make you gain weight

9. Grab a piece of gum : binging will make your body and face bloat

8. Get out of the kitchen : it will take you double the amount of time to get to your goal weight

7. Drink more water : your clothes will become tighter

6. Go for a walk : you will regret binging in the morning

5. Watch a TV show : wearing a bathing suit will be so much harder

4. Draw yourself at your goal weight : you will feel greasy

3. Do a YouTube workout : binging ruins your teeth and skin

2. Write down the reasons you want to lose weight : you will feel guilty

1. Drink a hot tea : control yourself for future you

[paper-thinprincess-blog]

starving isn’t cute. starving isn’t pretty. it’s not aesthetic. it’s not declining food with a smile or sipping on green tea. it’s desperately hoping your stomach doesn’t growl loud enough for people to hear. it’s trying to pick the zero calorie drink option without your friends noticing. it’s feeling so fucking hungry and knowing you won’t eat. it’s chugging water to try and ease the emptiness of your stomach. it’s your vision blurring when you stand and splitting migraines that last for hours. it’s a special, unspoken kind of self-harm that’s so easy to get addicted to. it’s feeling empty all day and it’s hunger pains in the middle of the night and it’s not sleeping while you hopelessly dream of your next meal, so far away. starving isn’t cute, it isn’t pretty, it isn’t aesthetic. starving is a cruel addiction, an intricate type of self-harm, an exhilarating torture.

and, fuck, if i don’t love feeling empty.

[paper-thinprincess-blog]

Being skinny isn't just for photos.

Imagine walking down the street or down a hallway and having your thighs breeze past each other without touching. It will be flirtatious, and in the spring all the wind and flowers will just float right through the gap in your thighs. The way you walk will be graceful. Like a delicate angel, a perfect nymph that glides instead of stomps.

Imagine in summer when the aqua waves lap around your waist and nearly knock you over. Your flat waist will be perfect for holding when your friends or family toss you easily into the air and then into the cool water. You’ll wear a bikini proudly, any bikini you want. You’ll feel more comfortable tanning like a goddess when your stomach doesn’t roll around without you doing anything.

Imagine when as Autumn sets in and you think of your crush wrapped in a blanket with you, watching a scary movie together. His hand reaches around you and he can actually touch your other shoulder. He won’t be disgusted with the flab hanging off your limbs like dead weight. And if you’re skinny enough, he may even kiss you.

Imagine being perfect even in winter. While everyone else looks like walking marshmallows in their coats and scarves you’ll still be as small and delicate as the snow falling onto your hair. You will be able to leave little to no footprint in the snow, and they will all see you as a light little bird gliding across the blizzard.

Being skinny isn’t just for pictures. It’s for living without chains that hold you back by the skin, preventing you from having joy in your life. It doesn’t matter when season it is, there is always something that will be better if you are skinny. So don’t give up. And lose that weight.

[paper-thinprincess-blog]

What people think an eating disorder is:

~going straight into fasting for 3 days

~gets up from the table to go purge without anyone noticing or hearing

~runs at night without parents knowing

~it only takes a week for you to get skinny

~you are not tired

~you don’t eat at all

~you exercise for 1 hour a day

~grades stay high

~“GREEN TEA HUNNNNY”

-take your vitamins sweet pea

-parents don’t ask you to eat

-cute outfits

-goes to inpatient and comes out cured

-eats 1 grape a day

~paints nails and smiles

~friends love and support you

~goes out and eats a piece of celery and nobody cares

What an eating disorder really is like

~looking in the mirror and saying you are going fast but never do

~waiting till everyone is away/asleep or you are in the shower to purge

~leaving bags of vomit under your bed

~running in place whenever you can

~staying up late looking at thinspo and crying wish you looked like that

~fasting for 24 hours then BINGING ON 4,000 calories

~grades fall

~everything is secrets secrets secrets

~getting high

~melatonin 24/7

~green tea Diet Coke water

~you sometime spend all of your time exercising and exercising and then gain a pound

~punching your stomach,pinching your thighs, and biting you arms in the the mirror because you are fat

~binge binge binge purge

~purge purge binge

~black tea green tea mint tea

~“sorry cant make it to dinner”

~binges late at night

~weird fucking cravings

~either takes 1000 showers a day or takes one once a week

~HUGE sweatshirts

~goes to inpatient and then goes back because you still don’t know how to eat

~purges 1 grape

~baggy clothes

~paints nails over and over because you don’t want to eat and the smell is disgusting

~STARVE YOU DUMB FUCKING HOE

~biting off your nails

~freaking out over 200 calories but then eats over 1000