mirazai

[mirazai]

[mirazai]

seven deadly sins and their causes

pride / low self-confidence, searching for praise

may want to be famous, may be obsessed with being publicly recognized and receiving credit for what they do (and sometimes, what they don't do). generally, such characters are difficult to sympathize with unless the reader is aware of their inner life. fix: develop internal confidence & remain above others' opinions

greed / insecure, feeling unsafe, paranoid

obsessed with what they do not have, to the point of elevating that desire above God or basic morality. often the desire is for wealth, but can be for anything, including friendship or love. depending on the desire, the character may be easier or harder to sympathize with. probably the most common sin i see in myself & others. fix: understand that anything obtained by subverting god/morality carries bad karma and will not bring satisfaction

wrath / obsessive self-hatred, feeling wronged

rage directed towards the innocent or a desire for excessive punishment. justified anger does not count. may manifest as violence, suicide, racial hatred. easy to sympathize with when suicidal or when the reader is aware of their inner life. likely difficult otherwise. fix: understanding the victim of the rage is innocent, or that pursuing excessive punishment/torture only harms oneself

envy / fear of not receiving one's share, scarcity mindset

not only desiring another's possessions, but also the desire that the other loses said possessions. taking joy in another's pain. such characters are often easy to sympathize with, if envious of another who isn't innocent. fix: realizing another's pain does not enhance one's own experience of life

lust / impaired higher faculties

harmful s*xual deviancy (adultery, r*pe, porn use). excessive m*sturbation alone falls under gluttony. often, such a character is animalistic and lacks human faculties for reason, spirituality, or connection. very difficult to sympathize with. fix: must leave behind animalistic nature and see s*x as inherently mundane (not the point of life). must understand s*x as an opportunity to connect with a partner(s), much like cuddling or conversation.

gluttony / using sensation to escape pain

overindulgence and overconsumption of anything. food, m*sturbation, television, music, books, or even indulging in self-pity. such characters use gluttony to escape whatever pain is in their minds. overindulgence fills the mind with sensation and noise so that one is not forced to rest there in silence. very easy to sympathize with, and also very common. fix: must remove the noise and sit with the mind/meditate. must deal with the pain. may spend life afterwards as an ascetic, or on the path of moderation.

sloth / anhedonia, hopelessness

little interest in life itself. such a character is more depressed than one who commits suicide, as they have no desire to even take the actions required to die. the ultimate form of trying to opt out of life. such characters are very easy to sympathize with as well, and often face a complete spiritual void within themselves. fix: only way out is to fix the inherent spiritual void. heartbreak and other momentary pains cannot cause true, permanent anhedonia. must believe in some meaning, either some form of religion, or a personal mission of some kind. any form of this meaning must be oriented around being of service to others, as sloth is caused by not wanting to live for whatever they were living for before (likely some false mission, or for themselves, or for an object of greed etc.)

#writing #sins #character development #character study #characters #character motivation #character arcs #arc ideas #emotional development #fatal flaws

[mirazai]

Book recs for different kinds of healing 💕

Best for people battling trauma: The Body Keeps the Score

Best for anxiety: Hope and Help for Your Nerves: End Anxiety Now

Best for recovery from addiction: The Unexpected Joy of Being Sober

Best for women survivors of relationship abuse: Healing the Trauma of Abuse: A Women’s Workbook

Best for understanding a therapist’s perspective: Maybe You Should Talk to Someone

Best for battling burnout: Burnout: The Secret to Unlocking the Stress Cycle

Best for healing from emotional pain: Emotional First Aid

Best for understanding family trauma: It Didn’t Start with You: How Inherited Family Trauma Shapes Who We Are and How to End the Cycle

Best for navigating relationships: Attached: The New Science of Adult Attachment and How It Can Help You Find—and Keep—Love

Best for highly sensitive people: The Highly Sensitive Person: How to Thrive When the World Overwhelms You

Best for practicing self-love: Loving Bravely

Best for finding order in life: 7 Habits of Highly Effective People

Sometimes picking up a book is the best thing we can do 📚

[mirazai]

In the Buddhist view, suffering is my karma, so what then? Do I just live with it, forever?

Suicide would only increase it, I know, but how much is too much? Does it ever end?

#Buddhism #mental illness #cry for help #karma #bad karma #death

[mirazai]

it frightens me, how much i can regret. i wish i took every path not taken, that i was anything but what i am now. let me be anything but this

#cry for help #depressing life #depressing as fuck #idk what im doing #mental illness

[mirazai]

[mirazai]

Unironically about to try this to fix my IBS

Let’s talk about: Energy Absorption

Energy absorption is how you take energy from outside and blend it with your own energy. It’s very important to understand how you absorb energy so that you can keep your field as fortified as possible.

Sex

Sex actually impacts your field greatly. Letting someone inside you in any way, kissing, etc, allows their energy to mix with yours. This is why it’s important to watch who you choose to be with. If you are higher vibe than the people you sleep with, you’re gonna feel very healing for them and this can lead them to becoming a little ummm obsessed. Because you boost their field. They will say stuff like wow you feel so amazing, omg, and they’ll come back around. And how do you feel? Well since your energy was just drained in the exchange, you may notice you feel down, empty, sad, lonely, but generally worse after sleeping with them.

Food

When people used to ask me why I stopped eating meat, one thing I told them was the energy. When you ingest something like meat, for example, you are bringing the energy of that being into yours. So if you eat beef from a cow who had a sad, horrible life on a cow farm, welp, that energy is now mingling with yours. This is why I advocate for people, if they want to eat meat, to look local, or to hunt it themselves. The same thing goes for plants though. Plants lovingly tended to have more energy than those not as personally cared. Again, this is a good reason to buy from small local farmers who can give more to their plants. The more sensitive you become to energy, the more you can begin to understand how certain energies impact you.

Absorption by touch

You can absorb energy through intentional touch, specifically when it comes to nature. If you have been feeling off energetically, sitting in grass and touching grass can help bring your energy field back to neutral as the pure energy of the grass gives to you. You can feel this with water too. Water actually can clean your energy field from energies you pick up during the day, but you can also intentionally absorb energy through water with submersion, as well as mixing things in water to be absorbed by your physical being, such as epson salt. This is a lot of times why people say cuddling with their pet improves their mood. Animals and plants have very pure energy, and they can help clear your field and recharge you. It’s not you’re giving them your negative energy it’s more like they can help take it on and transmute it. Some charged objects such as crystals, can also house energy that can then be felt by the person touching it. I’ll do a post on charging items at a later date.

Intention can affect absorption. Setting intentions with your food and water and anything you take into yourself is a good way to ensure it’s energy is used the best it can be. There’s a reason many cultures show gratitude before eating and after eating. Thanking your food for nourishing you is an example of this.

Just existing, your energy field is in flux based on people around you, buildings, your clothes, everything has an energy but you don’t necessarily absorb all of this energetically. Some energies that feel heavy can cling to you, which is why water cleansing is so powerful. Like if you live somewhere with heavy pollutants or you work around sick people, water cleansing will be especially beneficial for you to reset your field. If heavy energy lingers too long in your field it can start to be absorbed. Which is why regular time outside, water cleansing and intentional eating are all important practices.

[mirazai]

are YOU a shaman?

Have YOU been unexplainably ill for a long time? Do doctors have no idea what's wrong? Do you suffer from unexplainable body-aches, illnesses, headaches, or vomiting? Do you faint, sleep much more than average, or hide from the light?

If so, YOU may be a shaman!

Await a vision of a supernatural figure and a dream of your own death- this is the initiatory process, after which your illness will be lifted. Welcome to the guild.

For more information, see The Catalpa Bow by Carmen Blacker.

#mystery illness #invisible illness #shaman #magic #witches #witch aesthetic #witchy #witchy things #spiritualism #dreams #i hate being sick #body aches #headache #fatigue

[mirazai]

he didn't love me, so i never left my room

he called me fat, so i watched what i ate

no one will love you echoed in my tomb

but who said that? tell me, whom?

i knocked at the door, to try to escape

yet that same voice told me it was too late

my life would be over just as it began

no, i said, this can't be my fate-

it is, it is, the voice gently crooned

familiar, static sensation of doom

you don't want to leave, you've been unloved so long-

come sleep and let me sing you a song-

please, i begged, i can't take this gloom

who said that? tell me, whom?

so i stayed in bed, and tapped at my phone

but the voice, it never would leave me alone

she won't stop talking, i posted, downcast

who the hell's with you, some stranger asked

nobody, of course, i typed, alarmed

i'm truly alone, my life is all gone

then who's fucking talking, you goddamn moron?

and the voice- i need, the who, the whom

of frightening tales about infinite doom

the fear-fueled, deep blue safe cocoon-

of course! there was no one else in the room!

it was me, just me, feeling more pain

because it felt safer than having to strain

he said i was worthless, i took it as fact

and let me, myself, constantly attack

til i was a wreck, a ghost in the gloom

there was never anyone else in my room.

#poetry #sad poem #sad poetry #depressing life #tw depressing thoughts #depressing quotes #depressing as fuck #mental health #loneliest #wish it wasnt me #this is a cry for help

[mirazai]

It's a pity that students read Heart of Darkness in high school or college, well before most of them are likely to understand the implications every time Marlow, Kurtz, or someone else refers to "The Company". Anyone who's worked in a job where your performance rating matters knows exactly how encompassing that term is. The book is a critique of empire and colonialism, but it's also a critique of capitalist culture (which has only gotten worse since it was published).

#heart of darkness #antiwork #capitalism #anti capitalist #late stage capitalism

[mirazai]

There's this whole trend that's been going on for a while now that every story has to be "gritty" or "real" in order to be worth anything && it's super frustrating bc obviously realism isn't always the point. It's the same people who don't understand why artistic depiction is often better than photographs, the whole point is communicating a sense/nonverbalizable thoughtform the artist has.

The trend is also why books like Hanya Yanagihara's A Little Life win awards despite being terrible, actually unrealistic, and literally torture porn. Cause something actually being "gritty/real" means no happy endings, maybe bittersweet at best. I'm so ready for this to go out of fashion lol

The previous post made me think some more about the real life influences on LOTR, so because I’m down with a cold and have a lot of time to spare, I finally wanted to write a coherent post about those comments GRRM made about Aragorn and his tax policy.

For those who haven’t heard the actual quote, here it is:

Tolkien can say that Aragorn became king and reigned for a hundred years, and he was wise and good. But Tolkien doesn’t ask the question: What was Aragorn’s tax policy? Did he maintain a standing army? What did he do in times of flood and famine? And what about all these orcs? By the end of the war, Sauron is gone but all of the orcs aren’t gone – they’re in the mountains. Did Aragorn pursue a policy of systematic genocide and kill them? Even the little baby orcs, in their little orc cradles? In real life, real-life kings had real-life problems to deal with. Just being a good guy was not the answer.

And my god, do I have problems with this approach to Tolkien. It’s kind of like asking why Bilbo was unconscious for a lot of the battle of five armies, when we know it was a story Tolkien was telling his kids before sleep.

When looking at LOTR, I think you can’t not read it as an ultimate escapist fantasy - and what’s most important, Tolkien’s personal escapist fantasy.

He is Frodo - a man born into a middle class family, educated, well-read, with close friends coming from the same “social sphere”, like Merry and Pippin, who died in WWI. Sam is in a very literal sense the batmen Tolkien fought with, which he said he considered “so far superior to myself”.

Tolkien had a few batmen during the war, like the article from my previous post mentions. Most probably because he fought in a few different units, but also, he may have lost some of them to war.

And in LOTR, they all get a happy ending.

Of all four of them, Frodo is the only one who can’t return home, most probably mirroring Tolkien’s trauma. He’s the only one whose ending is grounded in trauma, PTSD, loss. The rest of the hobbits get happy endings - very simple and traditional in a way that after the war was nothing but good - they marry, they have kids, the kids marry each other, everyone is happy and lives long lives.

Sam, especially, gets the happiest ending of all in this sense - he marries a woman he grew up with, he has so many beautiful kids, he is mayor for like seven times and everyone loves him, the Shire thrives.

Tolkien was too traumatised after the war not to write Frodo as a mirror of his experiences. But then he took all the people who fought alongside him, who suffered alongside him, people who he lost, and gave them the happiest fairy tale endings he could think of. And it’s not that Merry, Pippin and Sam weren’t as traumatised - this ending is not meant to belittle their experiences - Tolkien is simply giving them the ending that real life didn’t give them.

Returning to the original point, to Aragorn - it’s just another version of the same mechanism. Gondor was struggling, Gongor had Mordor as their immediate neighbours and was heavily affected by the war as well. And then there came a just, good king, and everything was fine. The end. It’s a subplot of the same fantasy as the hobbits’ endings. It doesn’t matter how hard ruling is, we trust that Aragorn is a good king, because people of Gondor deserve a good king (the people of the real world deserved a good ruler who wouldn’t drag them to war), and we know that Aragorn is an honorable, just man.

Nothing about the LOTR ending - apart from Frodo’s trauma - is meant to be realistic. Why would Tolkien want to write WWI and the aftermath - this time fictional.

[mirazai]

I hate you constant production of sequels and prequels. I hate you reboots that contribute nothing. I hate you origin stories that no one asked for. I hate you everyone that makes adaptations and leave the original creator in the dark. I hate you everyone that takes stories and strips away everything they have to say so it can appeal to every possible person. I hate you everyone involved who thinks no one notices when you directly ignore the events/cannon of the previous installment. I hate you shows that only make sense if you've seen all the other shows. I hate you studios that think you can buy yourselves a good story.

#still can't believe these are from a real set and not a cosplay convention #stop with the reboots already #nobody needs sex and the city powerpuff girls edition

[mirazai]

Lo Scarafaggio (3/?)

“I believe,” begins Severus, “that Mr. Potter is suffering from a sort of possession, if you will. Something that magic as it exists now is not accustomed to dealing with. He's been seeing visions, both true and false, of the future and the present."

"How long has this been going on?"

"A year or so," admits Harry. "I told Headmaster Dumbledore, but he didn't seem to think it was a problem."

"Albus Dumbledore? Has he looked into the issue?"

"Well, he just said to come to him if I had another vision, but when I did, he wasn't at Hogwarts."

"Potter's godfather and have I agreed that he is not likely to help. As Mr. Potter said, Dumbledore has not made this a priority, despite Mr. Potter's distress."

"I'm not distressed!"

"You were about to lead your friends into a trap because of a false vision," hisses Severus. "You were distressed enough that you wouldn't think clearly! Imagine my surprise when I called Grimmauld, and found Black safe and unharmed, and then immediately spotted you and your friends ready to hare off to the Ministry!"

Harry seems prepared to spew vitriol right back, but Father Michele has had enough. From what he can tell, neither of them would be here if they didn't at least believe they shared a common goal. "Distress aside," he says. "You mean to say that due to one of these visions, you and others were very nearly led into a trap? What would have happened, had you gone?"

"Well, we might have been hurt. Or killed."

He frowns. "This trap, it was entirely a physical threat? Not metaphysical? Who would lay such a trap for children? Oh-" and then it comes to him, all at once- he'd seen it in the wizarding newspaper, last week, over a caffè corretto. A break-in at the British Ministry, and their Dark Lord aspirant returned from the dead. "It's that traditionalist group, the, ah, mangiatore di morte? Eaters of Death?"

"Eaters of Death?" Harry laughs. "No wonder Voldemort never took over Europe."

"If they are after you, because you nearly killed their leader as a baby, and they managed to lure you into a trap with these visions, is it not possible they've slipped you something? Something that induces suggestibility, perhaps, or- some magical method of sending you visions?"

"Do you know of any such methods?" asks Severus.

"No."

"Nor does Professor Medici, nor Dumbledore, nor any of the other distinguished staff of Hogwarts. Where magic fails, we must try other methods. And, well- there is other information I would share," offers Severus. "After an Unbreakable Vow, if you would be interested in helping us."

"Nominally, my duty is limited to my diocese," he replies. "But given that there are few wizards and witches who take vows, and fewer still who are experienced in the rites of exorcism, I suppose that does make it my duty to help you- but I will not consent to an Unbreakable Vow. I have already taken a vow to uphold confidentiality in cases of exorcism, and I assure you that vow was just as serious as the vows of the priesthood."

Severus scowls, but Harry nods. "We don't really need the Unbreakable Vow, do we?"

The professor glances at him, but seems unwilling to speak, so Father Michele continues. "Whatever information you have," he says, "I would not reveal it. My mother was English, and my father Italian, but they were both Muggles- but you already know that, Professor, or you wouldn't have revealed so much, or brought Harry here. Put just a little more trust in me, and in the vows of my profession, and speak openly. I assure you that I will do whatever I can to help you get to the bottom of this matter. The Church works with psychologists, prayer groups, and even Muggle universities. I have the resources to help. And if the matter proves intractable, if it requires magical intervention as well, Arlo will help."

"Arlo Medici? He just called you a cockroach!"

"But he will help. The reason he will help is the same reason he loathes me- he, too, is Muggle-born."

#harry potter #harry potter fanfiction #fanfiction writing #fanfiction prompts #should i continue? #idk what im doing #fanfiction #fic writing #maybe ill put it on ao3 #snape #professor severus snape #pro snape #professor snape #loscarafaggio

[mirazai]

Marmot Pass, July 2022

[mirazai]

they're even ruining powerpuff girls its like nobody wants to take a chance on good original content anymore

I hate you constant production of sequels and prequels. I hate you reboots that contribute nothing. I hate you origin stories that no one asked for. I hate you everyone that makes adaptations and leave the original creator in the dark. I hate you everyone that takes stories and strips away everything they have to say so it can appeal to every possible person. I hate you everyone involved who thinks no one notices when you directly ignore the events/cannon of the previous installment. I hate you shows that only make sense if you've seen all the other shows. I hate you studios that think you can buy yourselves a good story.

[mirazai]

Lo Scarafaggio (2/?)

So he steps back, and they stumble through, the man with the hooked nose and the weedy, unkempt child savior. "Hello," he says. "I am Father Michele. Please have a seat." His English does not flow as well as his native Italian, or even Latin, but they don't seem to mind. The boy, in particular, looks exhausted.

"I have espresso, and biscotti," he offers, digging about in his kitchen. He always keeps them on hand for parishioners, and his system doesn't fail him now. With a light tap of his wand, the cups and dishes float over to the table and settle themselves gently before his guests. "I'm surprised," says the hook-nosed man. "Medici claimed you'd given up magic altogether. Is it not contrary to your faith?"

"The devil and our Lord are parallels," he replies. "Where we take the Lord's sacrament to enjoy His blessings, followers of Satan use their own cursed objects to cast evil spells. Satan often gives the possessed the power to manipulate the world in ways that defy physics. So why, then, should the Lord be incapable of granting such power?"

It's clear the man appreciates that answer. His dark eyes glimmer with interest. "Medici spoke as if you were a zealot, but it's clear that isn't true. I apologize for my abruptness earlier. I am Professor Severus Snape, I teach Potions at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry in Scotland." He holds out his hand, and Father Michele shakes it.

"And you?" the priest asks, turning towards the boy. He's mowing down the snacks as if he hasn't eaten in days. "Ah, boy? What is your name?"

He puts his biscotti down and meets Father Michele's gaze with irritation. "Why bother asking? I know you know, I saw you looking at my scar."

Severus is scowling, but he raises a hand to stop him from interfering. "I know you are Britain's child savior," he offers gently. "That does not mean that I know your name."

"Not so famous after all, Potter," the man smirks. He ignores him, focusing on the boy.

"Potter?" he asks. "And what is your last name?"

"It's Potter," the boy responds. "Sorry, Father. I'm Harry James Potter. Um, I go to Hogwarts. And I'm the Boy-Who-Lived, in the UK."

"More biscotti?"

"No, thank you," says Severus, and the boy wilts slightly. Father Michele puts another packet of biscotti before him.

"You have come all the way from Scotland to see me, so tell me, how can I help you?"

#harry potter #harry potter fanfiction #fanfiction writing #fanfiction prompts #should i continue? #idk what im doing #fanfiction #fic writing #maybe ill put it on ao3 #snape #professor severus snape #pro snape #professor snape #loscarafaggio

[mirazai]

Lo Scarafaggio (1/?)

Father Michele was not accustomed to receiving Floo calls, especially after he left Rhea Silvia for the priesthood. So he was stunned when, late one evening, the fire in his hearth morphed from a bright yellow-orange to an eerie green, and a man's face appeared in the flame.

"Arlo?" Father Michele steps before the flame, unbelieving. "Arlo Medici? Sei tu?"

"C'è lo scarafaggio. Wizards from England came to Rhea Silvia and asked to contact you-"

"And he'd be more likely to help us," interjects another voice, "if you didn't call him a cockroach. Do you mind, Professor?"

"Mezzosangue," Arlo mutters- half-blood- but he steps aside, and an unknown man's face appears in the flame. His hooked nose nearly pushes the flame just outside the fireplace, and Father Michele hurriedly moves his books to the table.

"May we come through?" asks the man, pulling another face into the flame. "I believe we need your help."

The fire takes a minute to coalesce around the new face, and Father Michele rubs at his eyes and looks again. That can't be right. But there it is, clear as day- a forehead marked by a distinctive bolt of lightning. Britain's child savior.

"Well," he mumbles. "Well. Yes. Please come through."

#harry potter #harry potter fanfiction #fanfiction writing #fanfiction prompts #should i continue? #idk what im doing #fanfiction #fic writing #maybe ill put it on ao3 #snape #professor severus snape #pro snape #professor snape #loscarafaggio