empahla

[empahla]

My life has been Monday all over the place.

I’m not sure when this current run of bad luck started. It’s hard to pinpoint since I’m not a lucky person historically (or at casinos). But when it comes to unfortunate, this year is pulling out all the stops. My mom died in January, so that could be colouring my impressions re bad luck, but I suspect not. The broken tooth PTSD flare might also be skewing my views  but again, I consider it…

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#recovery eating disorder recovery funny bad luck repairs

[empahla]

Are you sure you're nervous?

My mother taught English literature and language. I wonder if I would've loved words as much without her? #words #nervous #language

Definitions are important things. We aren’t always speaking the same language, even if we’re speaking the same language. I get nervous. I’m not sure that means the same thing to me as it does to you, however. And what are we talking about – walking home alone in the dark, or swimming with sharks? I’m Keegan. My brain goes into overkill almost instantly. Happiness is a dictionary. And, according…

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#anxiety #dailyprompt #dailyprompt-1916 #fear #language #nervous #phobias

[empahla]

Things I liked about the week that was - an off-the-cuff joint.

To start fresh Monday, you have to do the cleaning on Sunday. #sundaymood #recovery #grief

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#cats #eating disorder recovery #grief #loss #memes #mother #music #pets #recovery

[empahla]

Work to rule is the correct choice.

Employers don't own us. We forget this too often. #capitalism #quietquit

We live in strange times. The world of work has become very odd. Employment is supposed to be that thing you do that allows you to live your life. You work for the paycheques, and the income lets you pay your bills and do other things. Some jobs are callings, and some are just employment, marking time. But none of them should have an element of ownership. None of them should be your…

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#capitalism #dailyprompt #dailyprompt-1899 #economics #employement #quiet quit #work #work to rule

[empahla]

Laughter and humour.

They say laughter is good medicine. Perhaps I'll order some from Amazon. I'm finding it challenging of late. #humor #humour #laughter #grief

Laughter comes in various shapes and sizes, and not all of them are benign. There’s a big difference between laughing with and laughing at someone. I’ve never been very fond of the latter, not in real life, not in television, and not in film. Laughing at is mostly about punching down and the cheap shot, and mostly, I’m not that keen. This is unfortunate: it’s a popular genre enjoyed by many,…

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#dailyprompt #dailyprompt-1892 #deadpan #humor #humour #laughter #sarcasm

[empahla]

I'm neurotic, an off-the-cuff joint.

The intersection of grief and c-PTSD is not the happiest place in the world, especially when you factor broken teeth into the mix.

I’m neurotic. I’m neurotic in the literal sense – I have neuroses. Lots of them. A neurosis is a mental condition not caused by organic disease, involving symptoms of stress such as depression, anxiety, obsessive and compulsive behaviour, and somatic responses, but not a radical loss of touch with reality. Neurotics mostly don’t experience psychotic breaks. At its root, neurotic behaviour is…

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#c-ptsd #dailyprompt #dailyprompt-1882 #eating disorder recovery #eating disorders #grief #ptsd #teeth

[empahla]

Grief is like Pop Rocks.

Grief turns your brain into Pop Rocks for quite some time. It's rather annoying, tbh #grief #death #mother

My mother died on January 3, 2024, but we – I – finished the last of the bureaucracy last Wednesday. All the notifications we need to do are done, all her services are cancelled, and all the government departments are updated – and why there isn’t one department to do that in this computer age is beyond me. Someone should create a death app. You enter the name of the person deceased along with…

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#anger #dailyprompt #dailyprompt-1870 #death #grief #mother

[empahla]

A work in progress - memoir and life.

Memoir or autobiography - I'm just impressed that I put together 80,000 words in a single group. #memoir #recovery #eatingdisorderrecovery

I’ve written my autobiography. Sort of. It started out as an autobiography but evolved. My perception of what I was writing altered as I progressed, mostly due to an initial lack of understanding on my part as to what an autobiography is. What I’ve written is more of a memoir. An autobiography is a factual account of one’s life. It’s not terribly subjective, and autobiographies usually follow…

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#dailyprompt #dailyprompt-1867 #eating disorder recovery #eating disorders #mental illness #recovery

[empahla]

And then there was NutraSweet - an off-the-cuff joint.

I’m not a big fan of “what’s your favourite” questions because mostly, I don’t have favourites, and people tend to think that’s odd. What is your favorite drink? Whereas I think having favourites for categories so broad as drink, book, car, and movie is the strange choice. What kind of drink are we talking about, anyway? Favourite hot drink? Favourite still drink? Favourite carbonated…

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#dailyprompt #dailyprompt-1855 #eating disorder recovery #mental illness #recovery #self care

[empahla]

What do we owe the horrible people of the world?

Not everyone is good people. We've gotten out of the habit of mentioning that. "The Emperor's New Clothes" isn't a how-to manual. #Bigotry #Fundamentalists #2SLGBTQIA

“You catch more flies with honey than vinegar.” My parents used to say this to me frequently, especially my father. I’ve always been one to get passionate about topics I consider essential, and I’m not convinced that greys and moderation are appropriate in all areas. Some things deserve a robust response. [i] I wonder how often they used that honey and vinegar phrase with my brothers. But I…

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#2SLGBTQIA #bigotry #bravery #bullying #hate crimes #human rights #philosophy #politics

[empahla]

Ethics and the hard line

To be ethical is a good thing. When did we stop valuing it? I blame the 1980s. #ethics #values #philosophy

I’ve always had an overdeveloped sense of fairness. I say “overdeveloped” because it’s a charge that’s been levelled at me on more than one occasion. Overdeveloped. Aggressive. Judgmental. Rigid. We do like to throw adjectives at people when we disagree with them. I don’t know that the adjectives are entirely incorrect. I can be outspoken when it comes to my ethical convictions. I can be firm…

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#anxiety #ethics #Mental Health #morals #politics #recovery #values

[empahla]

On Saturdays, we wear memes.

On Fridays, we wear camo. #Recovery #EatingDisorderRecovery #MentalHealth

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#eating disorder recovery #eating disorders #memes #mental illness #recovery

[empahla]

Bring on the connectivity - an off-the-cuff joint.

The internet is a good thing, but the growing pains are going to be severe. #internet #tribalism #StarTrek

Gen X is an interesting generation. We’ve not only borne witness to amazing changes, we’ve embraced and adapted to them. We’re the kids born between the mid-sixties and 1980. We’re the latchkey kids and the MTV generation. We’re women in higher education and the workforce without (official) restrictions. We’re ostensibly about equal rights. Daily writing promptThe most important invention in…

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#boomers #change #dailyprompt #dailyprompt-1840 #gen x #internet #millenials #star trek

[empahla]

To-do lists - an off-the-cuff joint.

I have anxiety, so lists are my happy place, but I think lists are a good thing for everyone - though my son tells me differently. #goals #todo #mentalhealth

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#anxiety #dailyprompt #dailyprompt-1837 #goals #lists #recovery #self-care #to-do

[empahla]

Stuff

The thing with death is the aftermath. There's so much bureaucracy and minutiae. How odd that bureaucracy inspired poetry. #death #grief

We're our stuff, and our stuff is us, and our stuff is garbage, not in a metaphorical sense with regards to the quality of its execution or its greenwashing, but in the literal sense, in that most of our stuff is trash, or will end up there, not while we’re here, of course - in that case our stuff is valuable, all of it, the tchotchkes, the gifts and family heirlooms, the Chanel lipstick you…

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#death #grief #loss #mother #poems #poetry #recovery #stages of grief

[empahla]

Turning the page.

The death of my mother has been infinitely strange. Life goes on, and that's one of the weirdnesses. We had her memorial service. I gave the main eulogy. I've attached it to the post. #grief #death

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#death #eulogy #grief #loss #mother #recovery

[empahla]

Tight pants and other sins

Recovery doesn't stop for grief, and grief doesn't consider recovery. Not much in our life is done singularly. #Recovery #Grief

I���m wearing a pair of pants that are a little too tight, and in terms of eating disorder recovery, that’s a pretty epic win. [i] That I’m wearing pants – not baggy jeans, track pants, or yoga leggings – is also a win. Pants were in the category of “clothing allowed when my body is perfect.” Until then, it was baggy bottoms – bonus points if it was ugly or slovenly, or tighter ones covered in…

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#eating disorder recovery #eating disorders #fashion #grief #recovery #stages of grief