tora-ken

[tora-ken]

The Best of My Heart

Word Count: Just over 6.8k

Genre: Angst, Fluff

Warnings: hallucinations, blood, character death, brief mention of religion (no details honestly), brief mention of pregnancy, disgusting fluff, not edited

Currently Listening To: In the Stars by Benson Boone

Keep reading

#fluff #angst #tw. death

[tora-ken]

.when you were mine - sakusa kiyoomi

.pairings sakusa kiyoomi x gn!reader

.genre break up

.ongoing | completed

.tw cursing(?)

.wc 2.4k

SUMMARY

Leaving Sakusa Kiyoomi was hard, but staying with him was harder.

Keep me in your arms again, I pine for the warm feeling of home where our limbs laid restlessly in our bed. I long for the touch of your fingertips and the ghost of your breath. I yearn for the mixed laundry in our room, and how you tried your best to keep the colours from mixing. Your efforts were far from being in vain, rather it was my fault for never trying hard enough for you. Trying hard enough for us.

I awaken alone now, with your side of the bed empty, and cold. A naked pillow with no head to call its own. The nights are darker, where the winter season couldn't hold a candle to the hiemal desolation that hibernated in my heart.

The coffee is bitter; dark and too acerbic for my own liking. The taste lingers too. It's pungent, and the scent wafts around the house until I leave it.

It's practically embarrassing to walk the streets without your hand intertwined in mine, I feel discomfited at the fact that I can no longer grab a hold of your hand in order to find sanctuary, the same hand I would grip onto afraid that I would lose you in broad daylight, the same hand that embraced your body every night that we slept, and the same hand that would wipe away your tears in the evening.

Yet it was twilight when you left me. I felt your presence begin to dissipate within the air as I slept for longer, so when the chill of a human's existence or lack thereof, had held me in the night, I woke up: to see nothing on your side.

And it all came flashing back to me, why you had left. Why you had packed your bags, why you cried as you removed most of your belongings into one suitcase.

ー

"You're late home today."

"Yeah."

Pure silence grows in the atmosphere and neither of us speak. You seemed expectant that I would answer you, but I couldn't tell at the time.

"...Do you want to tell me why?"

"Do I have to? I'm tired today."

"Okay. There's food in the fridge if you ever get hungry."

ー

The awkwardness that grew in our relationship may have driven you more and more to leave, and it's my fault for not trying. The effort that I lacked for our relationship had been made up for by you, and it had taken all of your energy alongside it, and quite possibly, your love for me.

I drained you by loving you languidly, I emptied your void by not filling it the way you had wanted me to. I expected you to make all of the first moves, and that you would do all the work for me in this relationship, and that I had to do nothing.

But you said to me that you were fine with getting hurt, so long as it were for me. So why are you leaving now, when you were the one who promised that you would do everything to make me happy, are you tired of me? Have you had enough?

Our solicitous tête-à-têtes had soon enough squandered from the depths of our hearts and eventually reshaped themselves into a mandatory chore made from the top of our heads, maybe to remind one another that there could've been a spark, that maybe our love was salvageable; even though you knew full well I could not respond in the healthy ways we knew I should have.

I've grown to detest the very sight of bookstores, or gardens. They were your favourite date idea and we hadn't been to either one of them together in months. But to my dismay, your favourite library had sent me an email, notifying there was a book yet to be returned, and we had to pay a small fine.

The nostalgia seemed to creep back up into my memory as I took steps closer to return the book Essays of Love that had been contained carefully in the tote bag which you bought me from our uni days.

ー

"I know it's not much, but we're starving students, and I thought this would suit your coat that your mom bought you." You shot a tender smile towards me, as you handed the off white bag with intricate black brushes against the material, that unexpectedly did suit the coat my mother had purchased for me.

"You didn't need to do this." I remember that I had pressed a small kiss against the pads of your knuckles as we stepped closer in proximity in the blistering winters of Tokyo; the neon lights of the building illuminating the features on your face in which I grew accustomed to.

"I know. But I love you."

"Thanks."

ー

"That'll be ¥1000." The local librarian speaks, aggressively typing against the keys of her board, and simultaneously writing swiftly against the yellow pad paper which had notes we both knew would be futile in the future.

Handing her the money, I gave a quick thank you before making my way back home in the dark afternoon of December. Meandering around the town wasted too much time, and the solitude which had consumed my being after your departure soon became an obligation in my life, and there could be no other way to regurgitate these feelings of drab emptiness and neglect. But I finally had time to think to myself for a bit though. As calamitous my mind was, the inhospitable temper of the winter night kept me company and I was numbed to the glacier like climate during my promenade.

I treated you with a manner that seemed perfectly fine to me, but neglectful to you and I became too expectant of your actions, anticipating for you to ask to hold my hand, or to request that I hug you in the night, and that I could pass you the box of tissues beside me; and I thought as though it was enough for you.

It's strenuous to walk around our home when everything is painted with you, when your hairbrush still abides on the edge of the vanity of our my room. When your mismatched socks still dawdle in the hallways and into my vision as I walk up the stairs every passing day after you left, or when your old shirt still situates on your side of the bed just as I had positioned it so.

Once again I yearn for you, just like those nights ago, and the pain comes washing back like a tide, exposing my most vulnerable aspects. The curtains close and I can finally let my bottled up ardour burst, chest heaving, lips trembling with an audible quiver every few seconds. Lachrymose eyes and a runny nose could only be a brief description of the inexpressible emotions bubbling up within my soul.

Sheer agony engulfs itself within me and I lose all senses of sanity as I think of how I've lost you, how you've left me, and how I can never get you back.

ー

"Kiyoomi?" His head had never turned so fast towards the reverberation of your voice. There you stood in your glory, wearing what he knew you would consider "indoor clothes", holding a bag in your arms as well as your keys to the house.

"What are you doing here?" Flicking the tears away and regaining his posture, he looms over you, observing your current state.

You didn't look any better, skin pale, lips chapped and hair disheveled, if anything, you seemed worse than he did, yet you had too much pride in your personality to admit that.

"I've come to collect the rest of my belongings." Sharp and clean was the cut. Enough to slice through Kiyoomi's heart, and you could hear it if you listened closely.

The impending outcome of your relationship had come to its destination, and he deemed it unacceptable, as he tried to grasp you in his clutches whilst you pack away the rest of your belongings, taking Kiyoomi's heart with you.

His countless cries echoed in your shared bedroom, as he attempted to take your clothes back out of the bag you had brought alongside you.

"Just one more day, please, stay with me. And I'll let you go." As heartbreaking as it would be to him, you scoffed, taking his words like a joke, like it was offensive of him to even step near you.

"Stop trying. I'm sick of this, I'm sick of you. Where was all of this six months ago? Why are you acting up now? Stop being selfish and let me go." Yanking your wrist away from him, you zip up the bag bringing the rest of your belongings, ignoring the clenching sensation going wild in your chest.

His countless tries to win you back into his arms for the night had failed to his dismay, and you had vanished into the twilight to a destination he would never figure out. Your relationship together had begun deteriorating the moment you'd granted him anything he wished without wanting something in return, or in this case, his love.

The neglect he'd provided you had only driven you to do more for him, maybe to please him, to make him look your way; but to no avail would he send an ounce of his undivided attention towards you, the love of his life for who knows how long. It was an ongoing cycle, and it wasn't until six months later you'd realise you wasted all of your time and energy on a man who wouldn't exert the same impression just to remind you that he did love you back.

Yet somehow, you knew that no matter how little he had shown you that he'd loved you too, there was a voice in the back of your head that would try to reassure that maybe, truly, he did love you the same way you loved him, but it was just that he struggled. But you'd gotten rid of the voice in that part of your head, you knew it would only hurt you to keep defending Kiyoomi in this empty relationship. Pretending to yourself that some day he'd say those three words back and not just some half assed "Me too" or "Thanks" was ruining you more than staying with him, so maybe leaving was for the better.

Although it was true that Kiyoomi was never an affectionate person in the first place, you'd assumed that he'd changed for the ones that he loves, as any normal person would do, but he would never budge out of his shell, only breaking what was left of your heart. His introversion seemed to keep up for three or more years, or however long it was the two of you dated, he'd never keep track as he deemed anniversaries to be "unnecessarily difficult to plan".

So moving on from him would be the best decision, even though you'd loved him since you were 17, and you had known no better, than to love Sakusa Kiyoomi, Itachiyama's Ace Spiker. Even though it was going to hurt, and the process would be long and hard, you knew it'd be for the better and the both of you would grow up to be happier people. After all, you're only 23.

"Goodbye, Kiyoomi. I-" It was a growing habit to always say 'I love you' before departing from him, maybe to encourage him to say it back. Although looking at where you are right now, you knew it'd be best not to say anything at all, just to save yourselves the pain.

He's fumbling through his words, before he finally stammers. "I lo-love you."

It was enough to make you stop in your tracks, but it could not fully equate to the agonising memories where you'd wait hours and hours every day just to make sure he got home safe. It could not amount to the times you had wasted to put an effort into the relationship only for him to hand back a yawn alongside a wave of his hand saying, 'Not today.' None of it could measure to the countless dates, movies, dinners he had missed, using the excuse of his practice.

You were never an important priority of his in the first place, and it finally came to be that you would never be a priority of his in the future. Staying with him for longer would only be a constant reminder of how little he tried between the two of you, and it would just be a shot to your ego at this point.

"Please say something." His voice is quiet and hoarse, barely trembling out the syllables that you could only jusy decipher. He attempts to close thr gap between the two of you, stepping closer with his hands reached out to grab yours, and you walk further back, shaking your head, shattering his heart on impact.

"No." You firmly reply. "I'm sick of waiting, I'm tired of having to lie to myself and everybody else about how you're doing when the last time I've been able to check, you would only wave me off and say 'night'. What the hell is that, Kiyoomi?" Your words shoot towards him like a shot of a new venom, and his body freezes, unprepared for your next response. "I don't want this anymore."

He shakes his head in refusal, not ready to face the facts. "Don't say it," he hushes you, "please, don't say anything. Just stay with me, I'll be better. I know I will."

The newfound urge to suddenly plead you back into his life almost convinces you to retract your statement, and just go back to him. Go back to staying in the quiet, lonely home, where you would spend most days wondering if Kiyoomi was even going to be back today. However, you shake your head again, and give him a pitiful smile, ready to crush his heart with your bare hands and let the remnants crumble for him to clean up.

"I don't want you, Kiyoomi. So just let me leave." You try your hardest to ignore the collapse in his expression as he finally hears your farewell. Taking the bag you had filled with the rest of your stuff, you walk away from Kiyoomi, with his cracked sobs in the background begging you to stay.

It's hard to miss the wails of the man you once loved when it's thrown right at your face, and you no longer have an obligation to wipe his tears away. The sobs get fainter and fainter, and you take a breath of relief as you finally feel free from the shackles that love had kept you under.

a/n hi lol this was kinda sitting in my drafts so i just like did what i could im sorry for the half assed ending im so tired these days :(( and its been like months since ive been on this account

#haikyuu scenarios #haikyuu imagines #haikyuu fluff #haikyuu angst #haikyuu x reader

[tora-ken]

.when you were mine - sakusa kiyoomi

.pairings sakusa kiyoomi x gn!reader

.genre angst, break up, lovers to exes, hurt no comfort

.ongoing | completed

.tw cursing(?)

.wc 2.4k

SUMMARY

Leaving Sakusa Kiyoomi was hard, but staying with him was harder.

Keep me in your arms again, I pine for the warm feeling of home where our limbs laid restlessly in our bed. I long for the touch of your fingertips and the ghost of your breath. I yearn for the mixed laundry in our room, and how you tried your best to keep the colours from mixing. Your efforts were far from being in vain, rather it was my fault for never trying hard enough for you. Trying hard enough for us.

I awaken alone now, with your side of the bed empty, and cold. A naked pillow with no head to call its own. The nights are darker, where the winter season couldn't hold a candle to the hiemal desolation that hibernated in my heart.

The coffee is bitter; dark and too acerbic for my own liking. The taste lingers too. It's pungent, and the scent wafts around the house until I leave it.

It's practically embarrassing to walk the streets without your hand intertwined in mine, I feel discomfited at the fact that I can no longer grab a hold of your hand in order to find sanctuary, the same hand I would grip onto afraid that I would lose you in broad daylight, the same hand that embraced your body every night that we slept, and the same hand that would wipe away your tears in the evening.

Yet it was twilight when you left me. I felt your presence begin to dissipate within the air as I slept for longer, so when the chill of a human's existence or lack thereof, had held me in the night, I woke up: to see nothing on your side.

And it all came flashing back to me, why you had left. Why you had packed your bags, why you cried as you removed most of your belongings into one suitcase.

ー

"You're late home today."

"Yeah."

Pure silence grows in the atmosphere and neither of us speak. You seemed expectant that I would answer you, but I couldn't tell at the time.

"...Do you want to tell me why?"

"Do I have to? I'm tired today."

"Okay. There's food in the fridge if you ever get hungry."

ー

The awkwardness that grew in our relationship may have driven you more and more to leave, and it's my fault for not trying. The effort that I lacked for our relationship had been made up for by you, and it had taken all of your energy alongside it, and quite possibly, your love for me.

I drained you by loving you languidly, I emptied your void by not filling it the way you had wanted me to. I expected you to make all of the first moves, and that you would do all the work for me in this relationship, and that I had to do nothing.

But you said to me that you were fine with getting hurt, so long as it were for me. So why are you leaving now, when you were the one who promised that you would do everything to make me happy, are you tired of me? Have you had enough?

Our solicitous tête-à-têtes had soon enough squandered from the depths of our hearts and eventually reshaped themselves into a mandatory chore made from the top of our heads, maybe to remind one another that there could've been a spark, that maybe our love was salvageable; even though you knew full well I could not respond in the healthy ways we knew I should have.

I've grown to detest the very sight of bookstores, or gardens. They were your favourite date idea and we hadn't been to either one of them together in months. But to my dismay, your favourite library had sent me an email, notifying there was a book yet to be returned, and we had to pay a small fine.

The nostalgia seemed to creep back up into my memory as I took steps closer to return the book Essays of Love that had been contained carefully in the tote bag which you bought me from our uni days.

ー

"I know it's not much, but we're starving students, and I thought this would suit your coat that your mom bought you." You shot a tender smile towards me, as you handed the off white bag with intricate black brushes against the material, that unexpectedly did suit the coat my mother had purchased for me.

"You didn't need to do this." I remember that I had pressed a small kiss against the pads of your knuckles as we stepped closer in proximity in the blistering winters of Tokyo; the neon lights of the building illuminating the features on your face in which I grew accustomed to.

"I know. But I love you."

"Thanks."

ー

"That'll be ¥1000." The local librarian speaks, aggressively typing against the keys of her board, and simultaneously writing swiftly against the yellow pad paper which had notes we both knew would be futile in the future.

Handing her the money, I gave a quick thank you before making my way back home in the dark afternoon of December. Meandering around the town wasted too much time, and the solitude which had consumed my being after your departure soon became an obligation in my life, and there could be no other way to regurgitate these feelings of drab emptiness and neglect. But I finally had time to think to myself for a bit though. As calamitous my mind was, the inhospitable temper of the winter night kept me company and I was numbed to the glacier like climate during my promenade.

I treated you with a manner that seemed perfectly fine to me, but neglectful to you and I became too expectant of your actions, anticipating for you to ask to hold my hand, or to request that I hug you in the night, and that I could pass you the box of tissues beside me; and I thought as though it was enough for you.

It's strenuous to walk around our home when everything is painted with you, when your hairbrush still abides on the edge of the vanity of our my room. When your mismatched socks still dawdle in the hallways and into my vision as I walk up the stairs every passing day after you left, or when your old shirt still situates on your side of the bed just as I had positioned it so.

Once again I yearn for you, just like those nights ago, and the pain comes washing back like a tide, exposing my most vulnerable aspects. The curtains close and I can finally let my bottled up ardour burst, chest heaving, lips trembling with an audible quiver every few seconds. Lachrymose eyes and a runny nose could only be a brief description of the inexpressible emotions bubbling up within my soul.

Sheer agony engulfs itself within me and I lose all senses of sanity as I think of how I've lost you, how you've left me, and how I can never get you back.

ー

"Kiyoomi?" His head had never turned so fast towards the reverberation of your voice. There you stood in your glory, wearing what he knew you would consider "indoor clothes", holding a bag in your arms as well as your keys to the house.

"What are you doing here?" Flicking the tears away and regaining his posture, he looms over you, observing your current state.

You didn't look any better, skin pale, lips chapped and hair disheveled, if anything, you seemed worse than he did, yet you had too much pride in your personality to admit that.

"I've come to collect the rest of my belongings." Sharp and clean was the cut. Enough to slice through Kiyoomi's heart, and you could hear it if you listened closely.

The impending outcome of your relationship had come to its destination, and he deemed it unacceptable, as he tried to grasp you in his clutches whilst you pack away the rest of your belongings, taking Kiyoomi's heart with you.

His countless cries echoed in your shared bedroom, as he attempted to take your clothes back out of the bag you had brought alongside you.

"Just one more day, please, stay with me. And I'll let you go." As heartbreaking as it would be to him, you scoffed, taking his words like a joke, like it was offensive of him to even step near you.

"Stop trying. I'm sick of this, I'm sick of you. Where was all of this six months ago? Why are you acting up now? Stop being selfish and let me go." Yanking your wrist away from him, you zip up the bag bringing the rest of your belongings, ignoring the clenching sensation going wild in your chest.

His countless tries to win you back into his arms for the night had failed to his dismay, and you had vanished into the twilight to a destination he would never figure out. Your relationship together had begun deteriorating the moment you'd granted him anything he wished without wanting something in return, or in this case, his love.

The neglect he'd provided you had only driven you to do more for him, maybe to please him, to make him look your way; but to no avail would he send an ounce of his undivided attention towards you, the love of his life for who knows how long. It was an ongoing cycle, and it wasn't until six months later you'd realise you wasted all of your time and energy on a man who wouldn't exert the same impression just to remind you that he did love you back.

Yet somehow, you knew that no matter how little he had shown you that he'd loved you too, there was a voice in the back of your head that would try to reassure that maybe, truly, he did love you the same way you loved him, but it was just that he struggled. But you'd gotten rid of the voice in that part of your head, you knew it would only hurt you to keep defending Kiyoomi in this empty relationship. Pretending to yourself that some day he'd say those three words back and not just some half assed "Me too" or "Thanks" was ruining you more than staying with him, so maybe leaving was for the better.

Although it was true that Kiyoomi was never an affectionate person in the first place, you'd assumed that he'd changed for the ones that he loves, as any normal person would do, but he would never budge out of his shell, only breaking what was left of your heart. His introversion seemed to keep up for three or more years, or however long it was the two of you dated, he'd never keep track as he deemed anniversaries to be "unnecessarily difficult to plan".

So moving on from him would be the best decision, even though you'd loved him since you were 17, and you had known no better, than to love Sakusa Kiyoomi, Itachiyama's Ace Spiker. Even though it was going to hurt, and the process would be long and hard, you knew it'd be for the better and the both of you would grow up to be happier people. After all, you're only 23.

"Goodbye, Kiyoomi. I-" It was a growing habit to always say 'I love you' before departing from him, maybe to encourage him to say it back. Although looking at where you are right now, you knew it'd be best not to say anything at all, just to save yourselves the pain.

He's fumbling through his words, before he finally stammers. "I lo-love you."

It was enough to make you stop in your tracks, but it could not fully equate to the agonising memories where you'd wait hours and hours every day just to make sure he got home safe. It could not amount to the times you had wasted to put an effort into the relationship only for him to hand back a yawn alongside a wave of his hand saying, 'Not today.' None of it could measure to the countless dates, movies, dinners he had missed, using the excuse of his practice.

You were never an important priority of his in the first place, and it finally came to be that you would never be a priority of his in the future. Staying with him for longer would only be a constant reminder of how little he tried between the two of you, and it would just be a shot to your ego at this point.

"Please say something." His voice is quiet and hoarse, barely trembling out the syllables that you could only jusy decipher. He attempts to close thr gap between the two of you, stepping closer with his hands reached out to grab yours, and you walk further back, shaking your head, shattering his heart on impact.

"No." You firmly reply. "I'm sick of waiting, I'm tired of having to lie to myself and everybody else about how you're doing when the last time I've been able to check, you would only wave me off and say 'night'. What the hell is that, Kiyoomi?" Your words shoot towards him like a shot of a new venom, and his body freezes, unprepared for your next response. "I don't want this anymore."

He shakes his head in refusal, not ready to face the facts. "Don't say it," he hushes you, "please, don't say anything. Just stay with me, I'll be better. I know I will."

The newfound urge to suddenly plead you back into his life almost convinces you to retract your statement, and just go back to him. Go back to staying in the quiet, lonely home, where you would spend most days wondering if Kiyoomi was even going to be back today. However, you shake your head again, and give him a pitiful smile, ready to crush his heart with your bare hands and let the remnants crumble for him to clean up.

"I don't want you, Kiyoomi. So just let me leave." You try your hardest to ignore the collapse in his expression as he finally hears your farewell. Taking the bag you had filled with the rest of your stuff, you walk away from Kiyoomi, with his cracked sobs in the background begging you to stay.

It's hard to miss the wails of the man you once loved when it's thrown right at your face, and you no longer have an obligation to wipe his tears away. The sobs get fainter and fainter, and you take a breath of relief as you finally feel free from the shackles that love had kept you under.

a/n hi lol this was kinda sitting in my drafts so i just like did what i could im sorry for the half assed ending im so tired these days :(( and its been like months since ive been on this account

#anime #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu!! #haikyuu fluff #haikyuu #haikyuu angst #haikyuu x y/n #hq fluff #sakusa kiyoomi #kiyoomi sakusa #hq angst #kiyoomi sakusa x reader #sakusa kiyoomi x you #sakusa kiyoomi x reader #sakusa x reader #sakusa imagine #sakusa scenarios #hq sakusa #kiyoomi x reader #kiyoomi angst #kiyoomi imagine #anime x reader #haikyuu sakusa #haikyuu sakusa kiyoomi #haikyuu kiyoomi sakusa #hq sakusa x reader #hq sakusa angst #ha sakusa fluff #hq kiyoomi

[tora-ken]

OMG 😭😭😭

#HAPPY 300 #tysm 😭😭 #ily all <333 #i have more followers on my tmblr than my ig how embarrassing

[tora-ken]

[01:21] atsumu miya has a big crush on you

warnings none!

you weren't surprised that he stared at her; her features so delicate, yet sharp, gentle yet so bold. envy couldn't help but knock at your door as you notice that every class you catch him staring at her: your seatmate. much like all the other girls, you'd taken a liking to atsumu miya, the setter of the volleyball club.

you shared a few classes with him, but most of the time you sat apart in far distances from the room, your existence barely noticeable to his schedule. despite having a friendship with him several years back, he'd changed and drifted from you as a result of conflict in interest. blissful and short lived was the friendship, yet quality over quantity had truly reigned over that highlighted phrase, and you had come to terms with it yourself.

even though you had been friends with atsumu for two years as early teenagers; he made life feel like rainfall on a drought, sunshine in blistering winters. he'd provided you with chunks of happiness no other person could gift to you. losing him was a defeat on your behalf as you realised you weren't as important to him as you had thought.

sitting pretty your seatmate, emiko, sighed tirelessly at your cluelessness as you quietly groan at the reminder of atsumu never looking your way, when in reality it was the polar opposite.

watching you dejectedly sit every lesson beside her was a killjoy, and she'd wish you could notice that in reality atsumu had been burning holes into your face every class, and not her. although the chase was interesting to witness, it had taken far too long and she couldn't help but feel as if she'd become a wedge in the (yet to bloom) relationship.

"that ends this lesson, please make sure that all the people's names i've written on the board have handed in their assignment by tomorrow. you may all leave." like the speed of light, you pack up your books and are the first to leave the class, sparing no glance to the innocent setter waiting to grab your attention.

"miya-san," emiko calls out, "if you're going to stare at l/n-san all throughout the class, do it so they know that you're staring at them, not me."

atsumu's face burns red with embarrassment and he nods in accordance, before running towards the direction he assumed you headed. sighing yet again, emiko slowly packs her bags up and hopes that things between you and atsumu are cleared up.

a/n: this is kind of a whole like mutual pining thing but both love interests are dense and cant pick up hints ?? its really short though rip

#anime #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu!! #haikyuu fluff #haikyuu #haikyuu x y/n #hq fluff #atsumu miya #miya atsumu #miya atsumu x reader

[tora-ken]

[01:21] atsumu miya has a big crush on you

warnings none!

other timestamps

you weren't surprised that he stared at her; her features so delicate, yet sharp, gentle yet so bold. envy couldn't help but knock at your door as you notice that every class you catch him staring at her: your seatmate. much like all the other people, you'd taken a liking to atsumu miya, the setter of the volleyball club.

you shared a few classes with him, but most of the time you sat apart in far distances from the room, your existence barely noticeable to his schedule. despite having a friendship with him several years back, he'd changed and drifted from you as a result of conflict in interest. blissful and short lived was the friendship, yet quality over quantity had truly reigned over that highlighted phrase, and you had come to terms with it yourself.

even though you had been friends with atsumu for two years as early teenagers; he made life feel like rainfall on a drought, sunshine in blistering winters. he'd provided you with chunks of happiness no other person could gift to you. losing him was a defeat on your behalf as you realised you weren't as important to him as you had thought.

sitting pretty your seatmate, emiko, sighed tirelessly at your cluelessness as you quietly groan at the reminder of atsumu never looking your way, when in reality it was the polar opposite.

watching you dejectedly sit every lesson beside her was a killjoy, and she'd wish you could notice that in reality atsumu had been burning holes into your face every class, and not her. although the chase was interesting to witness, it had taken far too long and she couldn't help but feel as if she'd become a wedge in the (yet to bloom) relationship.

"that ends this lesson, please make sure that all the people's names i've written on the board have handed in their assignment by tomorrow. you may all leave." like the speed of light, you pack up your books and are the first to leave the class, sparing no glance to the innocent setter waiting to grab your attention.

"miya-san," emiko calls out, "if you're going to stare at l/n-san all throughout the class, do it so they know that you're staring at them, not me."

atsumu's face burns red with embarrassment and he nods in accordance, before running towards the direction he assumed you headed. sighing yet again, emiko slowly packs her bags up and hopes that things between you and atsumu are cleared up.

a/n: this is kind of a whole like mutual pining thing but both love interests are dense and cant pick up hints ?? its really short though rip

#anime #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu!! #haikyuu fluff #haikyuu #haikyuu x y/n #hq fluff #atsumu miya #miya atsumu #miya atsumu x reader #atsumu miya x reader #atsumu x reader #atsumu x yn #atsumu miya x yn #miya atsumu x yn #anime fluff #inarizaki #hq atsumu miya #atsumu scenarios #haikyuu scenarios #atsumu miya brainrot #miya atsumu brainrot #fluff #cliffhanger kind of

[tora-ken]

...guys im lowkey getting back into my kpop fanfiction phase pls i thought i escaped this years ago 😭😭

#kpop #[🧠] ー yang says #txt #enhypen #im gonna get addicted #whatever we move

[tora-ken]

[23:17] atsumu miya knows colour theory

warnings none just atsumu using a lot of nicknames

"atsumu."

humming, your boyfriend turns his head around towards your direction and finds peace within your presence as you sauntered your way to him.

"this is a very important question okay?" an interrogating expression beholds itself on your face, but atsumu only stares at the features upon it like it was the first time he'd seen a human. "atsumu. i need your answer."

"yes 'm listening, sweets."

"what's your favourite colour?"

the adoring expression atsumu wore like a badge had wore off and transforms into what you could only assume was a perplexed man sitting in front of you. he laughs.

"atsumu! i told you to answer the question this is serious." his face puffs up with a vermillion tone and he pulls you closer to his body, thick arms around your waist fitting together like jigsaw pieces.

"darling, yer so earnest about it, of course i'll laugh." your face is peppered with billions of feathery kisses, swiping him away with your hands you attempt to push him away and sulk; only to make his offense stronger and kisses you more.

"miya, answer my damn question-"

"ooh, pulling out miya are we?" teasingly, he smirks and how attractive it is to watch that stupid man in front of you lovingly mock you.

"it's not that hard of a question to answer." crossing your arms and folding your legs, you move to the other side of the couch before he scooches towards you to gift a disgustingly fat and tender kiss on your cheek.

"okay, then what's yer favourite colour my love?"

"since i'm not like you," you humph annoyedly, "green."

"then simple, mine is red."

puzzled, you unfold your arms and atsumu's cheesy smiles widens in it itself, slightly beginning to look creepy so you push your palm against his face and move him away, and he laughs before coming in to hug you once more.

"they're complementary colours, baby. it's supposed to be romantic." chuckling, his face is attached to your stomach and he lays upon your body, although the position is awkward.

"it sounds like christmas. and what are complementary colours?" disproving his point and forgetting the reason why you asked him the question in the first place, you relax your body and sit up properly for atsumu to prop his head on your legs.

"they're like colours that are opposites but they're good together. like us. and what's wrong with christmas, scrooge?" twiddling your fingers between his, he mutters and awaits your response.

"that was corny, and you only enjoy christmas because you're not the one making the christmas list for all of our friends and family." flicking his head you scold him and he winces, before bringing your fingers back and trapping them in his hands.

"now i have an excuse to hold your hand as well as provide for my own safety!" he pauses for a moment, "hey i do help with christmas shopping."

"you chose to buy fuzzy dice for samu last year."

"that was a good 1800¥ spent."

"he doesn't even own a car."

"what matters is that we spend too much money on him and last year was a cool down compared to all the rocking gifts i've got him before."

"you know what, it's fine, i'll handle the shopping but you pay for it."

"i'll accept that. now, i need to go upstairs i have super secret agent stuff to attend." he kisses the top of your head and bolts upstairs.

"miya atsumu, i know you're changing the shopping basket gifts for samu! get back down here."

a/n: my exams are ending soon thank whoever is up there

#anime #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu!! #haikyuu fluff #haikyuu #haikyuu x y/n #hq fluff #atsumu scenario #atsumu imagines

[tora-ken]

[23:17] atsumu miya knows colour theory

warnings none just atsumu using a lot of nicknames

other timestamps

"atsumu."

humming, your boyfriend turns his head around towards your direction and finds peace within your presence as you sauntered your way to him.

"this is a very important question okay?" an interrogating expression beholds itself on your face, but atsumu only stares at the features upon it like it was the first time he'd seen a human. "atsumu. i need your answer."

"yes 'm listening, sweets."

"what's your favourite colour?"

the adoring expression atsumu wore like a badge had wore off and transforms into what you could only assume was a perplexed man sitting in front of you. he laughs.

"atsumu! i told you to answer the question this is serious." his face puffs up with a vermillion tone and he pulls you closer to his body, thick arms around your waist fitting together like jigsaw pieces.

"darling, yer so earnest about it, of course i'll laugh." your face is peppered with billions of feathery kisses, swiping him away with your hands you attempt to push him away and sulk; only to make his offense stronger and kisses you more.

"miya, answer my damn question-"

"ooh, pulling out miya are we?" teasingly, he smirks and how attractive it is to watch that stupid man in front of you lovingly mock you.

"it's not that hard of a question to answer." crossing your arms and folding your legs, you move to the other side of the couch before he scooches towards you to gift a disgustingly fat and tender kiss on your cheek.

"okay, then what's yer favourite colour my love?"

"since i'm not like you," you humph annoyedly, "green."

"then simple, mine is red."

puzzled, you unfold your arms and atsumu's cheesy smiles widens in it itself, slightly beginning to look creepy so you push your palm against his face and move him away, and he laughs before coming in to hug you once more.

"they're complementary colours, baby. it's supposed to be romantic." chuckling, his face is attached to your stomach and he lays upon your body, although the position is awkward.

"it sounds like christmas. and what are complementary colours?" disproving his point and forgetting the reason why you asked him the question in the first place, you relax your body and sit up properly for atsumu to prop his head on your legs.

"they're like colours that are opposites but they're good together. like us. and what's wrong with christmas, scrooge?" twiddling your fingers between his, he mutters and awaits your response.

"that was corny, and you only enjoy christmas because you're not the one making the christmas list for all of our friends and family." flicking his head you scold him and he winces, before bringing your fingers back and trapping them in his hands.

"now i have an excuse to hold your hand as well as provide for my own safety!" he pauses for a moment, "hey i do help with christmas shopping."

"you chose to buy fuzzy dice for samu last year."

"that was a good 1800¥ spent."

"he doesn't even own a car."

"what matters is that we spend too much money on him and last year was a cool down compared to all the rocking gifts i've got him before."

"you know what, it's fine, i'll handle the shopping but you pay for it."

"i'll accept that. now, i need to go upstairs i have super secret agent stuff to attend." he kisses the top of your head and bolts upstairs.

"miya atsumu, i know you're changing the shopping basket gifts for samu! get back down here."

a/n: my exams are ending soon thank whoever is up there

#anime #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu!! #haikyuu fluff #haikyuu angst #haikyuu #haikyuu x y/n #hq fluff #atsumu scenario #atsumu imagines #miya atsumu x reader #atsumu miya x reader #atsumu miya #miya atsumu #miya atsumu fluff #osamu miya #miya osamu #suna rintarou #rintarou suna #haikyuu x gn!reader #inarizaki #kita shinsuke #aran ojiro #atsumu fluff

[tora-ken]

renaissance and rebirth. they’d seemed so easy for so long, something that oikawa toru could bask in underneath the sun, something he could hold and feel as they overtook him as easily as he could feel rain upon his open flesh.

water was meant to be rebirth, was it not? the ocean was meant to be his path to retribution, meant to swallow him whole and lap at the wounds that had trenched deep into his skin until they met his bone, and then he was meant to come out anew. he was meant to step out of the ocean as doubt washed off of him, he was meant to step into the depths of this earth and be released as an extension of this water and soil.

yet as the ocean pulls at his feet, as he watches the sand swirl beneath him, he feels no different. it’s silly now, to think that the earth would ever treat him as anything more than human, and yet he takes another step into the sea. he walks until it covers his calves, now, lets the water consume that part of his body as though it was only ever the ocean’s to have and to hold.

being human is a horribly fickle thing. he can feel the way the sun settles into his skin, he can feel the quiet breeze in his hair, the way the ocean pushes and pulls with every wave, and there is nothing more.

and yet, he is human and, despite this lack of rebirth, despite the way he is still the man he was before he wished for the ocean to overcome him, oikawa toru finds no need to beg.

he hears the way you step beside him in the water before he ever sees you settle next to him. the waves give to you, ripples moving around your joints and into the waters that crash against him.

and humanity reveals itself in moments like these, when oikawa’s chest tightens as your breath reaches his ears, as the sea salt air feels sweeter, a little more vivid in the sense that this is sure to be a memory—that as each moment passes it becomes nothing more than a suggestion in oikawa’s skull, and he will be sure to know the chill of his spine, the taste of the ocean, the twist of sunlight in your hair as well in five years as he does now.

humanity tends to reveal itself in the moments that define memories, not in the earthly waters, not in the wishes we have made for ourselves, and certainly not in the desire to let go that holds deep in the marrow of oikawa’s bones.

no, humanity is found in what tells him to stay.

“there,” you say, raising an index finger to the horizon. “a sailboat.” he follows your gaze and, sure enough, there rests what could only be described as the shadow of a sail deep in the ocean’s palm.

“good eye,” he replies, and then returns to you once more. you’ve always drawn him to you, as though you were a whisper he was desperately trying to hear—he could only wish to be close enough to you to know each of your secrets, to know the way you work as well as he knew the ground beneath his feet.

and yes, humanity is in his moments of memory, and yes, humanity is in the way he can feel the sun, the sand, the water, the breeze, but most importantly yes, his humanity is grounded in the rapture he finds in you.

“iwa would be surprised to find you so quiet, toru,” you say, and as always, he leans in closer to hear you speak.

“it’d be heartbreaking for him, i’m sure,” he muses, and he’s sure to catch the way you stifle laughter with your breath.

and this is what rapture feels like.

“for him to miss it? certainly.”

he rolls his eyes at you, and then you knock your shoulder into his, sending him off balance. he grabs onto you as he sways, watching as the water flows between the two of you, but of course you laugh while he pulls on your arm, bringing him back up to where he once stood. he doesn’t take his hand off of you, and you don’t move to release him either. instead, he wraps his arm around your shoulders, bringing you into him with a quiet ease.

neither one dares to speak again. the ocean seems to flow around you, melding you together until you feel more like one body than two. and perhaps humanity is something like this, a silence in understanding, the moments after laughter, the soreness after a smile.

oikawa leans down and presses his lips against your bare shoulder, kissing your flesh in uneven certainty. the movement is unpracticed, unfamiliar, and, in its most delicate form, human.

and perhaps it is not perfection, a lack of doubt, a need for renaissance and rebirth from the ocean that could ever scrape the humanity from oikawa’s bones. perhaps there is nothing that could dare to remove what could be from the wounds entrenched in his skin. and perhaps, most importantly, it is you that will remind him of this piece of humanity.

#oikawa toru #oikawa #oikawa imagine #oikawa x reader #[❣️]ーenjoyed by yang

[tora-ken]

CRYING?????? ME??? MAYBE

people and their egos.

genre. angst

main characters. gojo satoru, gn!reader

wc. 0.5k

a/n. not proofread btw,,, made this at 2am</3 this was mostly inspired by the tiktok sound thingy so like uhm yeah

you're not sure what time it really is right now. 10pm? 9pm? 12am? you don't know, but you're tired. you want to rest. you want to shut your bedroom door, hide under the covers and just sleep till the sun rises and sets. you want to sleep forever.

the house is silent. you are silent and so is satoru.

a normal person would apologize, say that he or she was at fault and say they would never do it again.

a person with a big ego? keep quiet. and that was what the both of you were doing right now.

you're seated on the couch, eyes shut and face buried in your hands as you taste the salty tears that had trickled down your eyes. satoru is standing at the kitchen counter, hands resting on it with his head down.

he sighs, "look, let's not do this today. we're both exhausted and clearly, not thinking straight. let's just—"

"i'm tired." you say, cutting him off. he nods at that, "so am i. so let's just sleep and—" you cut him off again, "no, satoru. i'm tired."

he looks over at you, eyes shivering as he evidently starts to panic a little. when he doesn't say anything, you look back up and meet his anxious eyes. you're pretty sure you look disgusting — messy hair, puffy, bloodshot eyes and cheeks tinted with dried up tears — but it's really the last thing you're concerned about.

"let's admit it, we do this every night. argue, run away from it, ignore each other then argue again. it's..." you trail off, scoffing ridiculously, "...immature of us. with our big-ass egos, we'll never make this work."

satoru gulps, hurrying towards you to kneel down in front of you as he grasps your hands in his. with tears welling up in his pretty blue eyes, satoru utters softly with a cracked voice, "okay, then let's not run away, hm? i apologize okay? i shouldn't have been late again and i should have at least texted you. so don't say that. don't—" he brings your hands up to his lips, pecking it, "—don't do this, please? i love you so much."

your heart tears at the sight. sniffling, you smile thankfully, apologizing as well, "i'm sorry too. i shouldn't have just screamed at you the moment you got home 'cause you were stressed and all." he smiles at you, seemingly sighing of relief as he responds, "i love you."

for a moment, it's just like the beginning. when the both of you had simply talked things out and made up easily. until it doesn't.

grinning painfully, you nod as you peck his forehead, "i love you too," he smiles. "but i can't."

his smile fades, "no. we can get through this. you're not alone. we said we would solve everything together so, don't." he pleads, hand gripping yours tighter and tighter.

"satoru, don't you see? we're just apologizing for the sake of it. this will never end. you and i, we're-we're never going to work out. not anymore." you say, pulling away and avoiding his gaze. at the end of the day, the same cycle would always repeat. it didn't matter if the both of you had put aside your egos. in the end, this was never going to work.

"but, i love you." satoru croaks, helpless, "and so do you. so why? why are you letting go?"

right, he loves you and you love him too. all the more, you should let go. because if you didn't do so now, it'll just gradually worsen.

"sometimes—" you smile sadly at him, looking away from his gorgeous eyes that fill with tears. he drops your and hand and onto the ground, crying.

"—loving each other, just isn't enough."

© all rights reserved. all content belongs to iwaizumri 2021.

#jujutsu kaisen #jjk #jujutsu kaisen x y/n #jujutsu kaisen x you #jujutsu kaisen x reader #[❣️]ーenjoyed by yang

[tora-ken]

[22:07] megumi fushiguro is whipped

warnings none

"megumi, look, they fell asleep on your shoulder." nobara points out eagerly as she turns to her left side only to notice that you, megumi's one and only, has fallen asleep on his shoulder during the bus journey home.

megumi carefully rotates his head and looks down to see you fast asleep, your mouth slightly agape and eyes tight shut.

"look he's going red!" yuuji teases, and guffaws with nobara as the two of them ridicule megumi's love struck stare.

"shut up," he hisses, "you'll wake them up."

nobara and yuuji "ooooh" facetiously before closing their mouths entirely when you begin to shift from your comfortable position on megumi's shoulder and wake up.

you're silent, and you don't say anything. there's a loud silence and you kiss your teeth and rub your eyes, before realising you didn't know what you were awake for; maybe someone was too loud.

so you close your eyes again and snuggle against the pillow you'd used when you fell asleep earlier and wrap your hands around the armchair.

megumi burns a crimson red as you unconsciously sleep on him, holding his forearm with your hands and pressing your face against his shoulder.

"shit." he mutters silently, and he can't see anything except you. maybe watching you sleep made him tired too, so surely, he laid his head upon yours and held your hand that was on his arm, and slept peacefully too.

stupefied, nobara and yuuji make o's with their mouth and stare at each other, and back at the tired couple.

"what the fuck." although being a pair, yuuji and nobara felt third wheeled and cleared their throats before being interrupted by the white haired adult behind them.

"ah young love."

a/n: a bit short but eh

#anime #jujutsu kaisen #jjk #jjk anime #jjk fluff #jjk angst #jujutsu kaisen megumi #jujutsu kaisen x reader #megumi fushiguro x reader

[tora-ken]

[22:07] megumi fushiguro is whipped

warnings none

other timestamps

"megumi, look, they fell asleep on your shoulder." nobara points out eagerly as she turns to her left side only to notice that you, megumi's one and only, has fallen asleep on his shoulder during the bus journey home.

megumi carefully rotates his head and looks down to see you fast asleep, your mouth slightly agape and eyes tight shut.

"look he's going red!" yuuji teases, and guffaws with nobara as the two of them ridicule megumi's love struck stare.

"shut up," he hisses, "you'll wake them up."

nobara and yuuji "ooooh" facetiously before closing their mouths entirely when you begin to shift from your comfortable position on megumi's shoulder and wake up.

you're silent, and you don't say anything. there's a loud silence and you kiss your teeth and rub your eyes, before realising you didn't know what you were awake for; maybe someone was too loud.

so you close your eyes again and snuggle against the pillow you'd used when you fell asleep earlier and wrap your hands around the armchair.

megumi burns a crimson red as you unconsciously sleep on him, holding his forearm with your hands and pressing your face against his shoulder.

"shit." he mutters silently, and he can't see anything except you. maybe watching you sleep made him tired too, so surely, he laid his head upon yours and held your hand that was on his arm, and slept peacefully too.

stupefied, nobara and yuuji make o's with their mouth and stare at each other, and back at the tired couple.

"what the fuck." although being a pair, yuuji and nobara felt third wheeled and cleared their throats before being interrupted by the white haired adult behind them.

"ah young love."

a/n: a bit short but eh

#anime #jujutsu kaisen #jjk #jjk anime #jjk fluff #jjk angst #jujutsu kaisen megumi #jujutsu kaisen x reader #megumi fushiguro x reader #megumi fushiguro x gn!reader #nobara kugisaki #yuuji itadori #megumi fushiguro #fushiguro megumi #itadori yuuji #kugisaki nobara #gojo satoru #satoru gojo #anime fluff #anime angst #anime x reader #jjk x reader #fushiguro megumi x reader #megumi #yuuji #nobara

[tora-ken]

I THOUGJT IT WAS RN E ONLY ONE

uhm is it just me or my tumblr font got sized down 🤨 it looks like the small font now ???

#thought my phone broke tbh #[🧠] ー yang says

[tora-ken]

mutuals who you think are too cool for you so you periodically check to see if they're still following you. im normal

#I FELT THIS IN MY SOUL

[tora-ken]

crying omfg

It's a terrible day for rain

Man. Angst seems to be all I can write these days. Much thanks to a friend of mine who beta read this fic for me.

“Ne, Toru. You think one day we will be just like them? Start a family together? Have children, watch them grow up…” your voice trails off, watching a family of three play by the water.

The sun shines down, bathing the both of you in its golden glow. A small break in between missions is all the time he can get to spend with you, so most of the time your dates are simply taking walks with him.

“I’m sure we will,” he ruffles your hair, a small smile gracing his features. “Little Gojos running around the house, climbing all over you, won’t that be a sight to see.”

His hand slides over, long fingers intertwined with yours. His palm is warm, his touch gentle as he runs a thumb over your skin. You look up at him, confused as he places a feather light kiss to your knuckles, cheek and finally your lips.

“Any chance you have an extra heart? Mine’s been stolen!” he flashes you a cheeky grin, laughing as he dodges your attempt to slap him.

“That was so cheesy!” you yell. “At least try a little harder!”

“That’s all it took for you to fall for me though,” he hums. You can tell that his bright blue eyes are sparkling in mischief behind the blindfold. You don't need to see them to know what he’s feeling.

You laugh, smiling ever so brightly at him, words forming on your lips that are now lost to him.

The sound of rain fills his ears, and the water slowly turns red beneath his feet. He lifts his gaze to its source - a body, slumped against the wall stained with their blood. Crimson droplets fall from his fingers as he crouches, reaching over to brush back the hair covering their eyes. His finger shakily trails down their stone cold cheek, leaving a red streak behind.

Your body is cold, so cold. He’s not sure if the rain has made you colder, or if bodies of loved ones naturally felt colder than others, but all he can focus on is the fact that you’re just so cold, a far cry from the warmth he felt each time he hugged you tightly.

“I’m so sorry,” he whispers, pressing his forehead against your lifeless face. He knows nothing will ever bring you back, least of all an empty apology. Saying it does nothing to alleviate the pain in his heart either.

“Gojo…” Utahime’s strained voice sounds behind him. He simply stands up, sliding his blindfold back on.

“We’re done here,” his voice betrays none of the turbulent emotions he feels as he walks away, hands shoved deep into his pockets. Ichiji remains silent as Gojo throws himself into the backseat of the car, slouching against the now wet leather seat.

“Home,” he says, nothing more. Ichiji doesn’t question anything. He knows of today’s mission, and from the looks of it, it was a success. If you could call it one.

The rest of the car ride is filled with silence, Gojo staring out of the window while Ichiji focuses on driving, leaving the sorcerer to grieve in peace. The sound of wipers clearing droplets of rain from the windshield is somehow noisier than usual, the high pitched squeaks piercing Gojo’s eardrums, reminding him of how alone he is now.

When your house slides into view, Gojo suddenly leans forward and says sharply, “No. Keep going. Drive to Jujutsu High.”

Surprised, Ichiji gives a quick nod, stepping on the accelerator again. Gojo flops back against the car seat, lifelessly watching your house pass by him in a blur. He can’t go back there anymore, not after he’s taken your life with his own hands.

Why’d you become a curse user? Why’d you turn against jujutsu society? Why’d you turn against him?

His hands begin to shake uncontrollably, memories of your last moments flashing through his mind. The way you were aiming for his throat, ready to kill, eyes filled with hate he never thought he’d see directed at him.

He had no choice. He had to put you down. In self-defense and to protect jujutsu society. Or so he keeps telling himself.

“I hate the higher-ups,” you mutter, kicking a small rock on the ground.

He raises an eyebrow at you, arm sliding around your waist, “oh, why?”

“I know what they’re trying to do by sending us on individual missions that are as far away from each other as possible. They want to separate us and take us out because they consider our relationship a threat,” you suddenly stop, looking up at him.

“I don’t want this stupid power play to continue,” you frown.

“Neither do I,” Gojo sighs. The both of you knew it was highly dangerous to get into a relationship and yet decided to take the risk, something he never regretted. You always brought a spark of joy into his life and made him feel like he could simply be Satoru, even if it was for brief moments at a time.

Each second he spent with you was a second where the burden of being the strongest jujutsu sorcerer was lifted from his shoulders, for he knew you were more than willing to help shoulder that responsibility.

“If only it was as simple as killing all of them,” you sigh, resting your head against his chest. He hugs you tighter in response, nuzzling his face into your hair.

“We will change this corrupt jujutsu society. One day we will have that happy family we dream of,” he whispers into your ear.

“I promise.”

So what went wrong along the way?

One moment you were happily stealing as much cotton candy from him as possible and the next you were out for his blood, mercilessly slaughtering any jujutsu sorcerer that stood in your way. What had happened during your last mission?

He couldn’t shake the fight from his memory. The way you refused to talk it out with him, your cursed energy baying for his blood as he did all he could to dodge your frenzied attacks whilst ensuring that he didn’t hurt you. That was the first time Gojo Satoru had ever been afraid in a fight, but it wasn’t for himself. He was afraid for you.

“Don’t get in my way!” you snarl, pushing his arm away and sending a burst of cursed energy at him. He dodges with ease, trying once again to grab your arm but you throw every last ounce of your jujutsu technique at him, wrestling your arm free.

“Calm down babe! Talk to me! What’s going on? We can get through this together!” he reaches out to you and once again you brush him off.

“Shut up! Either you stand aside and let me pass or you die alongside everyone else!” blood pours down your face from injuries sustained from earlier fights and into your eyes. Wiping it only causes the crimson liquid to be further smeared on your face and you spit out the blood that has trickled into your mouth.

“You’re already badly injured. I don’t want to hurt you any further,” Gojo frowns, throwing up Infinity to block all of your attacks.

You’re not thinking straight, he notes, as you continue to throw everything you have at him. Under normal circumstances, you would have cast domain amplification to override his Infinity but at present you hadn’t done so.

“Well that’s unfortunate,” you growl. “Because I have no qualms about hurting you!”

In your angry haze, your slip ups occur far more frequently and Gojo takes the opportunity to lock you in a choke hold.

“The higher ups have tasked me to kill you.”

He feels you tense against him, and for a split second he can see fear in your eyes but anger quickly returns as you spit your next words out like venom.

“So that’s what you’re here for? To kill me?”

“I don’t want to,” he releases you to prove his point, hands raised in surrender now that you’ve calmed down more. You slide into our fighting stance, eyes narrowed in suspicion but you’ve stopped trying to kill him. That’s a win in his book.

“So what are you here for?”

“To ask what happened that made them suddenly want you dead.”

You take a step forward, letting out a tired sigh.

“I killed someone important. They were trying to isolate me then kill me and pretend as though I died on the mission. But they underestimated my abilities. That’s why I’ve been branded as a traitor,” your cursed energy levels drop to a bare minimum as you slump against him, exhausted.

“You can’t do anything about it. Not as one person, no matter who you are. Because it’s undeniable that I killed an important jujutsu sorcerer, which is treason against jujutsu society.”

“No. I will find a way. I can’t lose you,” he shakes his head desperately. “You’re all I have left.”

“Toru. You have to leave me behind. For the sake of the new jujutsu world we dream of. I know you think you can't do it, but you have to move on. I’m sorry I couldn’t keep my side of our promise,” you smile, cupping his cheek.

Taking a few steps back, you ready yourself for the fight to resume. You close your eyes and recall each and every time the higher ups stood in your way of a happy life with the man you love, letting the emotions consume you.

Your cursed energy levels spike once again, flooding your entire body. When your eyes opened for the last time, the unending anger has drowned everything else out.

“So, please forgive me.”

Back at Jujutsu High, he finds the small red box he meant to give you when you came back from your mission and opens it, staring at the thin metal band that lies within. The diamond inlaid in the metal no longer glimmers in the backdrop of the pouring rain, bringing fresh tears to his swollen eyes.

Letting out a broken yell, he throws both the box and ring out of the window, collapsing onto his bed.

“I’m sorry,” he sobs, hugging his knees to his chest and bowing his head.

But sorry can’t bring you back.

#jjk #jujutsu kaisen #jujutsu kaisen x reader #gojo satoru #gojo x y/n #gojo x reader #jjk gojo #gojo angst #[❣️]ーenjoyed by yang

[tora-ken]

[03:10] gojou satoru is a loving stranger

warnings none

taking a deep breath, you recognise the man before you and everything comes rushing back; the memories, the jokes, the dates, all down to the last moment until you had broken up. yet that tingly feeling in your chest no longer lingered as it had done so in the past, but rather a sense of relief rested carefully against your lungs and you smile.

"...satoru." his ears perk up at the familar notes of your voice, and it's almost as if he's met you all over again. the memories flood back to him, euphoria flowing through his veins as he examines your features and how you've changed.

"y/n."

"it's been a while right?" soft spoken and gentle, nothing like how you were before; loud and outgoing, ready to hand over your opinion against someone who you thought was wrong.

"yeah, six or seven years. you look great." tapping his foot awkwardly, he's unsure as to how to fulfill the conversation, maybe it was because it had been so long, and seeing you now looked like it was the last time you would ever interact.

"thank you, uh you haven't aged since college." a new wrinkle line has formed beneath your nose, and above your lips; maybe an indication that you've been happier these days. your eyes are more genuine, and there's more life shining through it compared to the stress inducing days of your young adulthood.

maybe five years with each other wasn't enough, because satoru couldn't seem to recognise the person before him. you were so mature now, your fashion was so much more trim instead of the surplus oversized hoodies and basketball shorts that you'd sport in the light of day. there was a cup of black coffee in your hands too, a beverage you'd told him so many times you despised because of the overbearing scent and the bitter flavour. even your hair was longer, with your roots a different colour to the tips. the silence between you two was perplexing, since the mood was always bright or cacophonous, but in a sense that there were two people in their youth simply basking in the events of romance before adulthood would come whisking them away.

seven years away from satoru had most definitely transformed you, from a vociferous 20 something year old coming home at the crack of dawn with their partner after a night out to an adult in their early 30s, wondering when work is over so they have time to take a nap at home and possibly slip in the time to watch some tv. the priorities you had once fixed for yourself had changed once you and satoru had broken up, and you were more in order, administrative. seven years ago, you would've loathed the person you became, you would've mocked this new person, with satoru alongside you probably fiddling with your hair. but now you remember how immature you were seven years ago, and that this change was good for you, and that silence can be comforting rather than awkward.

"so what are you doing here, i thought you hated libraries?" as excruciatingly pesky satoru had found small talk, it seemed there was no other method to communicate with you.

"ah, i'm here to meet a friend. but i could say the same about you, what are you doing here?"

"oh, just finding some books to recommend to my students." he holds up a philosophy book, by some german philosopher whose name you couldn't pronounce.

"you used to hate students."

"and you used to hate the library."

you both chuckle internally, and before you head in different directions, you quickly turn around and say:

"sato- gojou san?" the sudden realisation that you hadn't seen him in years had taken away your rights to address him by his first name.

"yeah?" his stare is unfamiliar, like he's looking at a stranger, someone he was never on an emotional journey with, someone who never helped him grow.

"it was nice seeing you." 26 muscles and your lips are pulled to an angle that used to bring joy into satoru's life, but are now only given for courtesy.

"yeah, it was nice seeing you too."

a/n: there's nothing special ab this, i think i just wanted to show how two people who used to adore the existence of one another can turn into old strangers that you would seldom speak to

#anime #jujutsu kaisen #jujutsu kaisen gojo #jujutsu kaisen x reader #jujutsu kaisen anime #jujutsu kaisen angst #jujutsu kaisen fluff #gojou satoru x you #gojo x y/n #gojo satoru x y/n