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hitlikehammers · 4 months

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i realize that this is a world where anything is possible and—

a Pro-Football/Rockstar Super Bowl Steddie AU for @thefreakandthehair

I don’t as a rule write sports AUs, but I do, as a rule, bend my own rules when someone gives me prompts for a fic I’m writing as a gift.

So: when @thefreakandthehair prompted me with ‘Starry Night’ but said she would have liked also something about football? I tried to fulfill the request (try being the operative term)

Lex, I hope your birthday was as brilliant as you deserve, and that this little fic in celebration of you brightens your day

title from this poem, aptly titled and about, what else, but football; divider credit here

(Also sincerest thanks to the ever-lovely @pearynice for listening to me babble about this and having a look at the final product and being amazing all around, and @hbyrde36 for blindly hlepng pick which ending was ultimately posted—you guys are the best ✨)

✨also on ao3

“I am about ninety-nine-point-nine…” Eddie chews on his bottom lip, coils a stray curl around his index finger and resists dragging it across his mouth: “eight, point-nine-eight percent sure I’m not supposed to be here.”

He’s entirely sure he’s not supposed to be here. Not now.

“What are they going to do?” Steve scoffs at him, leading him by hand through the tunnels. “Kick us out? Ban us?”

He snorts, and Eddie stops trying to not-hide behind his hair a little because: not supposed to fucking be here.

“You’re gonna get us arrested or something.”

“Oh, how the mighty have fallen,” Steve cackles a little and maybe Eddie’s anxious, but he’ll never not melt at that sound, music brighter, holy like he could never touch, let alone play: “Eddie Munson, poster child for sticking it to the goddamn man,” Steve tuts, clicks his tongue and shakes his head: “afraid of stadium security.”

“Pretty sure they’ve got better people on payroll for this,” Eddie points out under his breath but never once fights Steve’s hold, his lead: he’d put his whole fucking life in this man’s hands, no question. It’s just that…

“Relax, babe,” Steve squeezes Eddie’s hand in his own; “no one will know.”

Eddie…Eddie doesn’t doubt Steve, never would, but, like—this is a big fucking deal.

“If Chrissy finds out we fucked something up—“ because that’s why Eddie’s here, obviously, at least in this specific capacity; not like Corroded fucking Coffin, no matter how many albums they’ve sold, would ever land a gig like this for themselves. Nope: Chrissy’s been a friend for eons, and when her career skyrocketed they were all ecstatic for her, but she never changed from being a hometown girl with a sweet heart, never let the fame or the money or the statues dull that down in her, so she was still the cheerleader who clapped for Eddie in middle school, and so of course she invited Eddie’s band to feature on a track—and of course they said yes.

So when she signed on for the halftime show and knew they’d be nearby recording? She’d asked them to join her on stage as special guests for a couple songs.

And no matter what else proved an incentive: Eddie and the guys would have said yes in a heartbeat. It’s the fucking halftime show, but more than that? It’s Chrissy Cunningham, and she smiled and cheered when the Hawkins auditorium sat in silent judgment in the face of their…everything.

“A,” Steve’s pulling him along just a little further, still; Eddie can tell they’re almost to the field, can see literal light at the end of the tunnel; “we will not fuck anything up.”

“I’m clumsy,” Eddie offers a token protest; it’s not untrue, but he’s also kinda half-assing the fight of it; “I might—”

“B,” Steve’s cut him off; “Chrissy loves me,” then he points to Eddie; “Chrissy loves you,” and Eddie tucks his chin a little more to press the bunch of his hair tighter against the seam of his lips; “Chrissy also loves us,” Steve gestures between the two of them, then, chest-to-chest and back; “as in, us together.”

And yeah, okay: Steve had been Chrissy’s friend properly before Eddie, used to help her get the height on her ponytail before games, caused a million rumors but they were never an item—so. Yeah. Chrissy loves them. As themselves, and as SteveandEddie.

“Just here,” Steve eases them to a halt and steadies Eddie by the biceps when he stumbles for the stop anyway because: clumsy, if he’s not on stage. Steve knows this, they’ve been at this too long for him not to, but.

He anticipates it so perfectly, and it still kinda skips in Eddie’s pulse like a giddy schoolgirl for the fact of it. They they’ve got this.

“Close your eyes,” Steve instructs as he smooths his hands past Eddie’s elbows, down to circle his wrists.

Eddie feels his eyes get big as he tries to frown, but gapes instead.

“I’ll run into—”

“I will not let you run into anything, love,” Steve pulls him in for a quick peck on the lips, and speaks into the contact sweet and warm:

“I’ve got you.”

Yeah. Yeah he fucking does.

Giddy-schoolgirl-under-his-ribs again, Jesus.

Eddie slips his eyes closed and barely even has to wait for Steve to grasp his hands tighter.

“Okay,” Steve murmurs deep and rumbly and hot under Eddie’s skin as he walks him at a careful pace further, further, turns a little, further again then slows: “now,” he brings Eddie’s hands together and kisses his knuckles, and Eddie’s not just warm under the skin, now he’s warm everywhere.

“Now, follow me down, we’re just going to sit,” and Steve presses one hand to the small of Eddie’s back and leads him, and Eddie goes because there is nowhere he wouldn’t, nowhere he won’t go with Steve beside him.

It’s just not possible; he’s not built to be anywhere else.

“And now lie back,” Steve eases him gentle even as he says it, and Eddie lets him, enjoys the feeling of being handled like this, precious and delicate almost, in this space that’s anything but save that it’s them, and what they are is stronger than spun silk, tested further than diamonds but they’re also tender, they’re also blood and bone and tangled together soft and vulnerable, if only just to shore each other up and tie together tighter.

“There you go,” Steve says as Eddie feels the whole of his body, the length of his back make full contact with the ground; “and tip your head,” he puts his open palm under Eddie’s chin like he needs to guide, but Eddie figures it’s just to touch: he doesn’t complain, because hell if he minds. As if he could ever.

“Now open your eyes.”

Eddie lets himself bask in the blind touch of Steve for just one more breath before he blinks and looks and—

“Oh,” Eddie barely breathes, and he can feel Steve beaming at him, so wide and shining out in the dark like the meteors that are streaking across endless stretch of sky above them, leaving trails behind to mark their paths, to leave proof of their being before they burn on descent and oh, oh.

“Right?” Steve breathes close to Eddie’s ear, strokes Eddie’s pulsepoint where he still holds at the wrist, kisses Eddie’s jaw as Eddie gapes up because it doesn’t matter how many times he sees the show, it’s awe inspiring.

So much like the man next to him, pressed tight against him so Eddie can feel him breathe: never once has Eddie stopped being filled up with wonder for him, never once will Eddie ever do anything but marvel that he’s here, that he exists, that Eddie can look at him and know in his bones that it’s true, unshakable when he stares and thinks: mine.

“Stevie,” Eddie spins his hand so it can lace with Steve’s, fingers interlocked as he turns into the press of his mouth to catch his lips for real, to taste: “sweetheart,” he mouths, tongues into Steve’s kiss: “it’s beautiful.”

You’re beautiful goes unsaid because they say it clear with touch; what we have is so much more than beautiful is the understood fucking you. Given like the spin of a planet, or the expanse of the universe.

“I know how much you like the stars,” Steve shapes the words more than speaks them, never moving back to pull apart their lips, not all the way; “and when I saw there was a shower, and we’d have a shot to see it, I,” and Steve presses a quick kiss into Eddie then: I couldn’t not, and Eddie thinks lucky isn’t a word that means anything at all, in the face of this.

He watches with Steve pressed against him, slid down to fit with his head on Eddie’s shoulder for a long stretch of seconds before the question comes to mind and he kisses Steve temple, reverent, but still in askance:

“The lights?”

Because it’s too dark. There are still a few bits of the stage setup that need to be moved before the kickoff, so he has to figure there’d be some lights, but the space surrounding them is a near-perfect void.

“So maybe someone knows we’re here,” Steve answers, a little wry. “I maybe bribed Lenny in Operations,” and of all the people working in this mass-ass complex, for this insane fucking event, Eddie actually knows who that is; let him bum a smoke the first time they came to rehearse. “We have about half an hour.”

Jesus. Jesus.

“God, I love you,” Eddie half-exhales, half-wonders at this, this, this specimen of a human before him, pressed against him close and he pulls Steve in, brings their still-joined hands to his chest and stretches down to kiss the tips of Steve’s fingers before just pressing hands there, making sure Steve feels:

“Every time I think you’ve stretched this heart as far as it’ll go,” Eddie whispers, because it’s sacred; this feeling, this thing they make together as one: “every time, you find room to fill it up all over again,” Eddie feels that stretched-heart of his pound a little beneath their hands, and fucking good, too, because then Steve feels it at the exact same time, and that’s what matters, what counts: that Steve knows the depth of this in Eddie’s chest, always; that he understands because:

“You’re magic.”

And Eddie means that. Eddie means that with all his pounding heart.

“You’re playing the Super Bowl tomorrow,” Steve says it like an explanation; like it’s enough of a reason. Like he would have done all of this anyway, just because.

“I am playing as a guest at the halftime,” Eddie knows that’s correct, he knows, but it’s still instinct to look at Steve like he’s making sure he gets the terms for all the different sports games right and it’s worth the knee-jerk instinct surviving all these years just for the grin and the nod he gets, so encouraging and indulgent and sweet; “show.”

“You are playing the Super Bowl, tomorrow.”

Because that’s the other thing, the thing that was entirely not-music-related that existed as the whole fucking incentive for Corroded Coffin to be in town for studio space in the first place: Steve, his Stevie, his partner and lover, beloved and adored, his Steve Harrington is the goddamn starting linebacker in the motherfucking Super Bowl.

Like Eddie would miss that for his fucking life.

Which: hold on.

“Don’t you have curfew? Coach’s orders?” Eddie turns a quirked brow to him and Steve just grins and, god: taps Eddie’s nose.

Gawwwwwd.

“I’m sneaky, baby,” Steve whispers and fuck, the stars above them are exquisite but they’ve got, like, nothing on the way Steve’s eyes shine. “Stealthy like a ninja.”

Eddie wants to laugh, snicker maybe a little under his breath but he…he can’t.

He can’t because he’s, his whole body feels weightless and tingly and untethered from gravity and matter and any atmosphere that isn’t Steve and Steve alone, like just be next to this man, the love of his life, is akin to and far beyond swimming alongside the shooting stars overhead: he can only relish, can only marvel.

He gets this. He gets to have this.

Unfathomable. And yet.

“You did all this for me,” Eddie exhales, still wondering at this. At Steve: the fact of him. The whole of him. This is the night before the biggest game of Steve’s career, likely the biggest day of Steve’s life and yet, here he is. Breaking rules, risking fuck knows what, just for Eddie. It’s, it’s…

“That can’t be a surprise by now,” Steve breathes back, nuzzles their noses a little and Eddie keens, because fuck.

“It’s not just,” Eddie tries to collect his thoughts, his point; “this is big, Stevie,” he says, like that encompasses it, encompasses the day they’re on the brink of, and the fact that they’re here right now, just before that day:

“This is big.”

“All the more reason,” Steve nips at Eddie’s lip then leans back, meets Eddie’s gaze square on before he breathes out slow, and lies back down, turns Eddie’s body to him, both of them on their sides and then he brings their hands between them, close enough that they hit both their chests when they breathe in: “because,” and he takes one more breath, and Eddie doesn’t know why it feels like Steve’s steeling himself, or building up to a thing he feels he has to steel himself for, because there’s nothing he could say or do that’ll sway Eddie from his side, there’s nothing, but then—Steve doesn’t feel stiff, or scared, or nervous against him, his hand in Eddie’s hand.

It just feels big, this moment, whatever it already holds or is gearing up to hold as more; it feels momentous, equally so, either way.

“Win or lose, tomorrow, no matter how big this is,” Steve finally speaks words into the tiny space between them, his grip firm and his eyes unwavering on Eddie the whole time. “I won the only thing I really wanted in life,” and his smile, dear god.

There are no stars, falling or burning, dying in a supernova or sprawling newly born: not a single goddamn one could compare.

“And he’s not really a prize, so it’s not really winning,” Steve’s watching him with so much love, so much love; “he’s a gift, he’s my heart,” and Steve mirrors Eddie this time, draws Eddie in to press against his chest, to feel the fluttering there; “and he gave me his to keep safe, and that was a whole other gift on top of everything,” and Steve laughs a little, his own overwhelming awe, and Eddie almost doesn’t know what to do, save grip Steve so fucking tight; save to memorize the cadence of his pulse like a song.

“So no matter what you call it,” Steve draws a deep breath and lets it shudder a little when he blows it back out; “when I wake up in the morning and I know he’s mine, and I’m his,” and Eddie lifts the hand not held to Steve’s heart to cup Steve’s cheek and just touch, just drink him in:

“I feel like the biggest winner in the world,” Steve says it, so honest, so heartfelt: so much.

“You’re a fucking sap,” Eddie doesn’t realize he’s crying until the tears clog the words when they tumble from his lips but then he’s leaning, then he’s kissing Steve like the world’s ending only to begin again and it’s perfect, it’s heavenly like the fires burning miles upon miles above their heads, cosmic and immense but then Steve’s pulling back, but his open palms are pressed to Eddie’s chest to manage it and it’s contact, it’s grounding: it, too, is perfect.

“Oh, really,” Steve’s lips curl, even as they’re swollen at the pout and wet-red still; “I’m a fucking sap?” but he doesn’t even look irritated, he looks entertained, no: he looks delighted and what—

“Let me one-up your standards then, Munson,” and Steve’s leaning in, catching Eddie’s lips one more time before he raises up on his knees, tips back on his calves and lifts from those glorious fucking thighs of his and if Steve’s ignoring curfew entirely Eddie thinks he’s got a good chance of asking for those thighs to be wrapped around him at some point in the next twelve hours before he gets to spend a good stretch of hours sharing the clothed version in those tight fucking pants with the whole goddamn country, sure, but at Jumbotron-size he can’t wholeheartedly complain and—

“Edward Elliot Munson.”

Wait. That’s him. He’s Edward Eli—

Why is he being full-named here, now?

He starts to sit up too, brings his eyes up from Steve’s glorious legs where they stretch even under his track pants, to meet his eyes and—

They shine. They shine.

They put the stars and the space matter and the glow of angels on high if they’re there at all: they put them all to fucking shame.

Steve puts them to shame.

“Eddie,” Steve breathes deep and Eddie catches the gleam of something in an obvious shape in his hands, but it’s only in his periphery: he cannot, he will never look away; he might be trembling already.

He’s definitely trembling already.

“Will you,” and Steve pauses, plays with Eddie’s bare ring finger, the only one empty just now and Eddie honestly never thought on it too hard but in this moment he knows, he knows in the marrow of him that he was waiting, that he was wanting and he was keeping it safe for just one thing, just one thing:

“Will you let me fill your heart up to stretching,” Steve blinks, and a tear falls; just one, glistening and glorious for the avalanche that’s spilling from Eddie; “and then will you let me fill it up even more, again and again and again, Eddie, will you let me do that for the rest of our lives?”

As if that’s a fucking question.

Eddie doesn’t even have to process the necessity of putting his lips on Steve, of kissing him breathless and then boneless and then weightless, so fucking close and so fucking fierce and giving everything and anything and all that he is and allthat they are; he doesn’t have to process it as a choice before they’re consuming, devouring each other relentless, unceasing, and Eddie will pull back and speak the ‘yes’ that’s already obvious, he will shake a little as Steve puts the ring on the naked finger waiting to be adorned, the last lone space waiting to be claimed; Eddie will wear it proudly on the stage when millions watch him play tomorrow, and there won’t be a single second he’s not smiling like a loon through the whole goddamn day, and it’ll have so very little to do with playing the biggest show of his life, and that’s wild, that’s insane: that is the only real thing in the whole fucking world and—yeah.

Yeah: the biggest prize of living at all is the one they’re holding tight between them, the one they’re passing back and forth, soul to soul between their lips.

#steddie #steve harrington #eddie munson #fluff #established relationship #established steddie #marriage proposal #rockstar au #football au #so very very soft #stranger things #gift fic #thefreakandthehair #hitlikehammers v words

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ficthots · 1 year

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Almost

A/N: Jesús I’m so sorry this has taken as long as it has. Anywho, this one was a blast to write! Look at how great that picture is of the man of the hour! As always let me know what you guys think and enjoy! (Friends to lovers) *also I’m posting this on my phone so if the format is weird I’ll fix it later*

Word Count: 7.9k+

Everyone knows the story. The one where she’s the girl next door and she’s hopelessly in love with the boy next door. There can be some variations in the plot depending on the circumstance. For example, sometimes he doesn’t seem to notice her or give her the time of day. Other times they’re best friends and she’s been harboring this ridiculous crush on him since the first day they met. Eventually, the boy comes to his senses, realizes he doesn’t want the extremely popular cheerleader, but the girl who’s been right there his whole life.

Taylor Swift even has a song based on this tale. She’s not the only pop star or country star, whatever she is now, to take this classic and turn it into a massive hit. It’s incredibly corny and unbelievably predictable, but people eat it up each and every time. Were you a part of that group? Not necessarily. Honestly, it was your least favorite kind of love story.

Which is why it’s all the more embarrassing that you were embroiled in it anyways.

Did you enjoy being a stereotype? Nope. Did it mean you weren’t one? Nope. Hopelessly embarrassing was the fact that you ticked off every single marker point.

Girl next door? Check. Boy next door who she’s been in love with since day one? Check. Best friends their entire lives? Check. Boy comes to his senses and realizes that what he’s been searching for has been right in front of him this entire time? Not quite. Again, thank you pop stars everywhere for that infamous line.

You had been friends with Josh since your first day of first grade. Family having just relocated from some bordering state, the new neighborhood in Michigan was full of kids your age. The twins that accompanied their mom to your front door as she delivered fresh baked brownies as a welcome to the neighborhood were the first ones you got the chance to meet.

Hiding behind their moms legs, she encouraged them to say hello to you. When you invited them to play on the new jungle gym your parents had set up for you just a few days prior, the rest was history. Hardly ever apart from that day onward, you took to Josh exceptionally fast. He was much more outgoing than his counterpart, always having you in a fit of giggles.

The crush part? That happened almost immediately as well. Taken by how brave he was by jumping off the swings into the grass in front of him, you were in awe. Ever since that day, you knew you were positively smitten with Joshua Kiszka.

You recalled fond memories and times spent with the boy who had quickly become your best friend. Getting in a fight with some douche in middle school who had called Josh weird, more movie nights then you could count, Josh waiting with your mom after your driving test to see if you had passed.

It was utterly annoying how many of your memories he was in. Even more bothersome that you enjoyed having him in all of those memories. Even though it stung like a son of a bitch that he was.

It was those things which would always cause the feelings to bloom after being dormant for a long winter. Made you nauseous just thinking about it. Sure, most people develop crushes on close friends at one point or another, but in your case it was disgusting how infatuated you truly were with the boy. And did he feel the same back? Not to your knowledge or understanding.

Were there times where you were beginning to wonder if maybe your feelings were being reciprocated. Of course! You were only human for god's sake and not too shabby of a person in your personal opinion. Winter formal was a perfect example of one of those instances.

This was the dance in high school that officially morphed the teenager from an awkward, clunky child to that of a blossoming young adult. It was a big deal.

Nearly everyone had dates to the swanky sophomore event, including your best friend.

You on the other hand hadn’t been asked by anyone. As the dance loomed closer and closer, no prospective dates on the horizon for you, Josh did the unthinkable for a high school boy who understood the importance of this event in your eyes.

He called his date and canceled on her so that he could be your date. What was a heartbroken, insecure young lady now had the best guy of all to accompany her to the dance. Tear streaked face and all, he escorted you to the dance and you two had the best time. Even indulging you with a slow dance. By the end of the night, you thought Josh was looking at you…differently. In a way that you had only dreamed about over the years of friendship.

When he walked you to your front door, you thought this might be it. What better way for it to be happening? He had dropped his date to make sure you weren’t going alone, it had been an incredibly romantic and fun night, this had to be it! Your first kiss, with the boy you were head over heels for.

Instead, he smacked your arm, thanked you for a good night, and walked over to his own home right next door. The ol’ Pittsburgh goodbye they called it. Rooted to your spot dumbfounded and utterly disappointed, you felt so stupid for thinking that he was going to look at you as anything more than just a friend.

Your mom had thrown open the front door, ecstatic to hear about how the dance had gone, but you ran past her. Only muttering that you were fine when asked what was wrong, you bounded up the stairs past your father, too.

You went to your room and sobbed for the entire night. Swearing to yourself that no matter what, you would never get your hopes up like that again. You avoided Josh for as long as you could the following days, but when he arrived at your house wondering what the heck was going on with you, your defenses were down.

It was pure torture living like this. Seriously, straight up hellish. Not able to figure out why you could not get over the man that had held your heart in his hand without even knowing it for years. Danny was even at a loss.

During the course of Josh becoming the front man for Greta Van Fleet, you took to the black sheep brother. Completely by accident, but hey at least you had Danny now as well. It had been after a hang out at his apartment where he had cornered you in the kitchen.

Pestering you until you finally admitted your feelings for Josh. He truly did not understand why you had the emotions and feelings you did for the boy, but he supported you nonetheless. A little too much for your liking.

Over the span of the next several years, he was always whispering in your ear that if you just told Josh how you felt, he more than likely would reciprocate what you were feeling. It didn’t matter how many times you told Danny, he would never understand. Jeopardizing that friendship and bond with Josh just simply wasn’t worth it.

Danny swore up and down that no matter what you said to Josh, you would never lose him like how you swore you would. Agreeing with him, you told him it wasn’t Josh you would lose, but the opposite. Josh would lose you. There was no possibility that you would ever be able to face him or continue on with how things had previously been. It’s just how it was.

You accepted it and you just wanted Danny to as well. He swore he would never understand fully why you would want to put yourself through that time and time again, but you ultimately told him that this was how things were and he needed to be the one to reach that level of acceptance that you had.

Even as you got older, watching Josh turn into the celebrity he was always meant to be, performing night after night, your heart still seized up whenever in his presence. Josh had convinced you to relocate to Nashville, stating that there was no way he could live without his best friend not being as close as you had been for years.

He had only been moved for less than three months when he called you, literally begging and pleading with you that he would do whatever it took to get you there with him. That there was no way he would be able to do this without his guiding star. How he was wandering in the desert and without his fixated star to point him in the right direction, he was hopeless.

Josh always had a way with words.

In layman's terms, you picked up your entire life and moved it. For him. You were so in love with him that it even shocked Danny as he helped the move into the apartment. Only shooting him dirty looks as he stared at you in the befuddled way he was, you realized how ridiculous this all seemed.

But it didn’t matter because it was Josh.

He had kept it secret for years and you knew there was no chance of him saying anything to anyone. Sure, it was unbelievably painful to see the conquests Josh was engaging in as he waltzed around the world with his siblings, but Josh wasn’t the relationship type. Or that’s what you used to console yourself because he had never made an actual move with you.

It was also one of the rotated excuses you fed Danny as he would bring it up to you. Josh had said time and time again that domesticity actually frightened him. He was used to this rockstar lifestyle and just the thought of settling down with someone was enough to set his skin aflame.

This was one of the things you had known about him your entire life. He had sworn off serious partnerships ever since high school. It just wasn’t the life for him. It killed you, but it was his wish.

That’s why when he began dating her, you didn’t think twice about it. Just another fling that he would eventually tire of before moving on to the next, maybe to you. Chances of that were slim, but hope propelled you forward.

Josh brought her up to you on a grocery trip he promised to accompany you on. Grabbing a bag of rice, you hardly stopped when he spoke. “I went out on a date last night,” humming as you checked the item from your list, your eyes moved back up and scanned the racks. “She was great actually. I don’t know what I was expecting, but she was fun to be around.”

Snorting at his words, you gave him the look that screamed, be realistic Josh. “What? I’m serious! I really like this girl,” he laughed through his words, but you only rolled your eyes. “Yeah, yeah. Can you grab me that jar?” Pointing to the one you needed, he scowled at you.

“Thank you for listening and being of help,” his words were dripping in sarcasm, but they had you stop moving the cart as you walked together. “Joshua. Come on, I know you. Relationships aren’t your thing, which were your own words by the way. You see how hard it is on Jake and Sam with their relationships, it’s also why Danny is no longer in one. I just want you to do what’s best for you.”

His brow furrowed as he thought about your words. “So, I’m just supposed to be alone forever then?” Scoffing, you began pushing the cart again. “Not what I said. All I’m saying is just take a moment and really think about this.” He huffed, but followed along with you, grabbing a box of cereal he knew you loved.

“Asshole.” He mumbled under his breath, but you heard. In retaliation you shoved the cart in his direction causing him to topple into the shelving unit. Bursting into laughter, his face was beat red in embarrassment, but couldn’t contain the laughter seeping out as people eyed him.

“You’re gonna pay for that.” And that was practically the last you had heard of her. Josh hadn’t brought her up again. With another tour impending and an album wrapping up, you didn’t give it a second thought when Josh withdrew from you a bit.

This was typically what he did when he needed his attention to go elsewhere. Especially on something as important as an album and tour. Danny on the other hand was constantly bugging you to spend some time with him and when your schedules finally aligned, you trekked over to his house for dinner and a movie.

It was when there was mention of her for the first time from someone other than Josh. Catching you entirely off guard, you and Danny were sitting at his kitchen island, munching on the last remnants of dinner when he brought it up. “He’s still seeing her.” Your brows contorted in confusion, speaking through a small bite of food.

“What?” He set his fork down, eyeing you to see what your reaction was going to be. “Josh. He’s still seeing her. Been a few weeks now.” It felt like a punch to the gut, but you did your best to play it off. “Thanks for the update, I guess?” You laughed, but Danny didn’t match your faux enthusiasm. “I met her for the first time. We met her for the first time.” You only hummed in response, using the napkin to wipe at your mouth, meal now finished.

Thoughts ran rampant in your mind. Was she the reason he was constantly blowing you off? Was she the reason you hadn’t heard from him in a week? This was the longest he had ever spent in a fling. What the hell did that even mean? It didn’t mean anything because at the end of the day it was still Josh.

Knowing you only had another moment to respond to Danny before he noticed something was off, you placed your plate in his sink, acting occupied with this task. Back facing him so he couldn’t see your response that you knew would be plastered to your face you finally answered.

“Yeah. How was it?” You inquired, not because you were actually interested in knowing, in fact it was the exact opposite. You didn’t want to know. At all. He leaned on the kitchen island directly behind you. “He really likes her.” You snorted, finally turning around to see Danny’s apologetic face staring down at you.

Shaking your head, you pointed your finger at him. “Don’t.” His hands went up, a shrug following. “Don’t what? I’m not doing anything.” Your head cocked at him. “You’re giving me that look.” Brows furrowing in response, he feigned innocence.

“What look? I’m not giving you a look.” Your arms crossed soundly over your chest, irritation starting to bubble up. “Yes you are! It’s that look that you give me whenever you tell me about a new Josh interest. I’m telling you, it’s going to be just like the other ones.” The waver in your voice was something you prayed he didn’t notice. Trying to sell yourself that bogus excuse.

Was it bogus?

He shrugged again, arms crossing over his chest, tongue poking his cheek. “I don’t know, star. This one seems…different.” You shook the words off. “Josh would’ve said something to me by now if it was different.” Your fingers made air quotes around the final word.

With your back now to the drummer again, his words sat heavy on your shoulders as they left his mouth. “Would he?” That was a damn good question. Would he? Josh had never shied away from giving you details about various entanglements, but he hadn’t so much as peeped about this one.

Would he?

It was what was replaying over in your head as you sat on his sofa. The first time you two had hung out in almost two weeks. Why was it making you so upset? Because you knew the actual reason why he hadn’t seen you. Traces of her were all over his house despite his efforts to hide it from you. He was outright lying to you. It stabbed you in the chest when he tried to feed you the lie.

They had been adamantly working on getting the nitty gritty details about the tour nailed down. That was what Josh told you. Danny told you something different. He was lying to you. Josh never lied to you. Until now.

Not on purpose anyways.

Of course, small white lies here and there were normal, but given the details Danny was giving you, Josh was blatantly trying to hide her from you. You just didn’t know why. Did she not know about you? Did Josh not want her to know about you? Why?

Josh threw a piece of crumpled paper at your head, laughing when your attention snapped back to the present, pulling you from your thoughts. “Where have you been? You’ve been off in wonderland all night. What’s going on?” You only plastered a smile on your weary face, offering a small shrug.

“Just,” debating on actually talking to him about this or giving him the option to tell you in his own time, you spoke, “just super tired from work is all.” It was Josh. He would tell you. There was obviously a reason why he hadn’t yet. You just didn’t know it.

It turns out the reason why he didn’t inform you of their…entanglement was because of how he wanted to do it. “I want you to meet her.” He finally blurted out one night. This evening had been spent in your home, a proclaimed self care night by Josh. According to him, your shitty moods around him and your constant excuse of work killing you, meant it was up to him to fix it.

So, here you were, sprawled out on your couch with him. Both wearing face masks, nails drying from the new polish he had gotten you, eyes shut with ice packs over your sockets, it caught you off guard.

“Huh?” You questioned, trying not to move your face with the mask on it. “I want to take you out to dinner so you can meet her. Seriously star, you’ll love her. She’s great.” Being able to use the mask as an excuse not to respond, your stomach was doing somersaults at just the thought of sitting at a table with whoever this girl was.

Feeling his finger poke your cheek, you pulled the ice packs from your eyes and narrowed them at him. “I don’t know, Josh.” Giving you the best puppy dog look he could, pushing out his bottom lip. “Please, star? It would mean so much to me. You’re my best friend and I really think you should meet her. Please?”

You gave in. It’s why you were sitting at an incredibly high end restaurant, waiting for them to arrive. Checking your phone to see a message from Danny, asking why the hell you would agree to something like that, you flipped it back over to be face down when you spotted them coming towards the table.

Standing to greet them, Josh pulled you into a tight embrace, a fake smile plastered to your lips as you took her in for the first time. Offering your hand and name, you didn’t hear her response. She was breathtaking. In a ridiculous sort of way that made you question what kind of genes ran in her family. Or if this was class a work done by some surgeon in Florida or California.

Sitting back down, you nervously shifted in your seat. Alone on your side of the table, Josh’s arm draped over the back of hers. Both of them beaming with happiness and joy. Your energy did not match theirs. Josh finally broke the tension you were almost 100% positive only you were feeling.

“Sorry we were late, star. Traffic was a-uh, nightmare.” His small chuckle at the end and the blush tinting his cheeks informed you right then that they had not been delayed by traffic. Waving him off, you chugged an entire glass of wine. “It’s fine. Oh-excuse me sir! Another glass please,” you asked the waiter, tapping the rim to let him know it was urgent.

Your ring clinked against the glass loudly as you repeatedly hit it, nervously waiting for the server to come back with the bottle.

It was truly the only way to get through the night. Yet, you did somehow manage to get through it. It was excruciating, but you did it. Sure, you were a bit past buzzed, losing count after the fourth glass of wine, but it was enough to get you through it.

She was a captivating person, that you could admit. Having traveled so much of the world by such a young age, a college degree under her belt, possibly another in the near future, and working for a fashion app you had never heard of, but apparently was quite popular.

It made you hate her even more.

Not bothering to offer a large goodbye to the pairing, you hurried off in the opposite direction of where they stood, Josh confused by your behavior tonight. Hailing an Uber, you had him deliver you to the only place you could think to go.

When Danny opened the door and saw your mascara streaked face, his seldom gaze met yours. Falling into his open arms, you wailed into his chest. Smoothing down your hair, he patted your back with his free hand. “I know, star, I know.”

You crashed on Danny’s couch that night. Soundly snoring away on his sofa, he sighed, removing the heels from your feet, seeing your phone screen light up repeatedly. Josh asking if you had made it home safe and if you were alright.

He stepped out of the room, dialing Josh who picked up immediately. “Hey, I saw your messages to star and I wanted to let you know she came to my house.” An immediate breath of relief expelling from his lungs. “Thank god. She was a bit,” Danny cut him off.

“Drunk? Yeah, I know. She crashed on my couch.” Josh sighed, telling Danny to have to call him in the morning. It was the last thing you wanted to do. To discuss the events from the night before. Wanting to permanently erase the traces of it from your mind all together.

Not wanting to leave Danny’s a minute before you absolutely needed to, he pushed you out of his front door to see Josh’s car parked in the driveway waiting for you. Pouting at Danny, his stern gaze peered at you. “Go. I’ll be here if you need me.” Huffing you slowly made your way to the Jeep.

Immediately turning down the loud music blasting through the speakers, you groaned. “A bit hungover are we?” He laughed, handing you the sunglasses you always kept in his car. Grumbling in response, he started the drive to your apartment.

“We need to talk about last night, star.” Sighing, you rested your forehead on your palm, elbow on the windowsill. “Pass.” You said, but Josh put the car in park after having got your coffee for the day.

Sipping the cold liquid, you sighed with the caffeinated relief. “Why did you go to Danny’s?” His tone sounded hurt and unsure. “What?” You said with a small laugh. “You get drunk at a very important dinner for me, hardly utter a goodbye, then run off to Danny’s house. Is there something going on between you two?”

Your jaw hung slack, immediately shaking your head. “Oh my god, no. He’s just a good friend. It’s just that he,” trying to decide how to word this properly, you sat on your response for a beat. “It’s just that Danny and I are the two lonesome folk of the group so we hang out to keep each other company. That’s all,” you assured Josh.

There was no possibility of telling him the full truth, but that was pretty spot on for what you could give him. It wasn’t far from the full truth at all, really. You and Danny were the only singles of the group, therefore he could relate to what you were feeling. Kind of.

Josh bought it. Squeezing your hand over the center console, the familiar coldness shocking your system as he did. “I know. I’m sorry,” you offered a reassuring smile, relaxing into the seat and asking him to drive you home. He did and the entire way, he didn’t mention her once.

He never did. Following the disaster of a first meeting, Josh got a sense that you weren’t the biggest fan of his interest so in order to keep things calm, he simply didn’t bring her up. You were fine with that at first.

Until it felt like he was explicitly leaving out most of the details of his life and what was really happening to him. Conversations were growing shorter as he came up with little to talk about given he was around her so often, there were few stories that didn’t involve her. That was when you actually saw him anyway.

Those nights that had once been a comfort and familiarity to you were sparse now. Few and far between to happen. When you would text him asking if he was available, you typically weren’t getting responses for over twenty-four hours. Instead, you found yourself wandering over to Danny’s more often than ever.

He was a true comfort, no longer pestering you about the crush he didn’t understand, but enjoying your presence. Movies, food, even self care nights had seemingly transferred over from your best friend to Danny.

Sitting on his sofa, face masks adorned, a knock on his front door startled you both as you cackled at the movie playing on his tv. Danny hurried to the door and pulled it open to reveal a frizzy haired boy whom you hadn’t laid eyes on in weeks, nearing a month now that you thought back on it.

Josh leaned around the boy after seeing what was on his face and saw you settled on the couch. His brow furrowed and irritation bubbled up. “What are you guys doing? Danny I’ve been trying to get a hold of you,” Danny pulled his phone from his back pocket at those words and saw a few missed messages from the man in front of him.

“Okay, well you found me, what’s up?” Leaning against the front door, your head craned to see Josh. “We’re having a selfcare night!” You called out, watching as Josh’s jaw set. He only hummed in response, eyes never leaving your relaxed figure. A shirt of Danny’s on you as well.

“I-um, we need you to re-record a part of Sacred the Thread. Didn’t come out like we were hoping,” Danny’s brow muddled together. “Yeah, alright, I’ll come by tomorrow.” Josh blinked up at the younger drummer and nodded curtly.

Turning on his heel, he didn’t say anything else as he left. Danny shot you a wild look as you two burst out laughing. “The hell is his problem?” He spoke as he collapsed back down next to you. Shrugging, you hit play as the show started back up. “It’s Josh, you know how he gets.”

When the timer on your phone went off, you grabbed Danny’s wrist, dragging him to his bathroom. “C’mon, masks need to come off.” He followed you without any restraint.

You heard from Josh first thing the next morning. Showing up at your doorstep, he barged into your apartment without any warning. Startling you, you nearly dropped your glass of juice as you shot daggers at him. “What the fuck, Josh?”

His hands landed on his hips, eyes bloodshot and staring at you. “I’m only going to ask you one more time. What’s going on between you and Danny?” Rolling your eyes you leaned against your counter. “I’ve already answered that and I’m not going to again. By the way, this is the first time you’ve spoken to me in what, three or four weeks, and this is how you do it?” Scoffing, you sipped the orange juice.

Noticing that his hands had a small tremble that he was trying to mask, he shook his head fervently, regaining your attention. “Sorry.” It was curt and short, indicating he didn’t truly meet it. Sighing, your eyebrows only raised.

“Anything else?” You questioned, clearly annoyed by how your morning was starting. He released a deep breath that he had been holding in his sternum. ��Can-can we hang out sometime next week? Please?”

Your mouth set, shrugging at his question. “You know where to find me.” Not expecting that type of response from you, he looked taken aback. He left your apartment that morning and it was another few weeks before you heard a peep from him again.

The hang out that Josh requested didn’t actually occur until two months later. It wasn’t as easy going and comfortable as you reminisced on how things used to be. He had a permanent look of guilt plastered to his face from the moment he took you in.

It was only an hour later when Josh cleared his throat as you two ate in almost complete silence. Eyes falling to him, you saw a grin appearing on his face. One that you hadn’t seen in your presence in far too long. “I have to tell you something.”

Placing your utensil down, you didn’t speak as he reached behind him and grabbed a small gift bag from the counter. Taking out what appeared to be a small box, he slid it across the table to you, the lid opened.

Anger immediately pummeled you.

“You’ve got to be kidding me, Josh?” Refusing to touch it, you eyed him and the item in pure disgust. He laughed at your appalled reaction, cheeks tinting pink. “Yeah, that’s what Jake said too.” Standing from your seat, you peered down at him. “No fucking shit! What the hell are you thinking?”

He rolled his eyes in retaliation. “I love her, star. I have never felt this for anyone else in my life. Ever. I never knew that something like this could even exist! She makes me so happy and I make her happy. If I know she’s the one, which she is, then why would I wait? She and I can start our forever now.”

Shaking your head at his explanation, you stared at him like he was out of his mind. “Do you realize how insane you sound? It’s been, what, six months? This is a huge mistake in the making, Josh. You need to slow down and really think about this.” His smile never diminished as he stood.

“I have and I’m going to ask her to marry me, star.” You couldn’t stand there and listen to this. Turning, you grabbed your purse from the couch and quickly walked to the front door. With Josh hot on your trail, he was calling out to you.

“You’ve got to be kidding me. Are you seriously that upset? What did I do? Star!” He halted as he saw you get in your car, silent tears making streaks on your cheeks. “Star?” He asked once more, voice diminishing in volume as you pulled out of his driveway and went home.

Ignoring the texts and calls that he was bombaring your phone with, you couldn’t bring yourself to get up from your bed. It felt like your entire world had crumbled around you in the blink of an eye. The boy next door that you had been hopelessly in love with since you could remember had chosen someone else to spend his forever with.

Some people are destined to be your almost. Not everyone gets the fairytale ending of being with the person who they thought they were destined to be with. Just because that person might be meant for you, doesn’t mean you’re meant for them. There has to be people who don’t get the guy. That was your destiny with Josh.

Your almost.

A knock on your door woke you up from your partially sleepy mood. Opening the door, his face was fully covered by an enormous bouquet. Sighing, you leaned against your door as he pulled them down to reveal a small, unsure smile.

“I’m sorry. I’m an inconsiderate asshole. I’m stupid and insensitive.” Lips pursing ever so slightly, you chimed in. “Stupid sounds about right,” snatching the beautiful bundle of flowers, you left the door open behind you as you went to your kitchen and set the flowers in the sink.

Eyeing him, his familiar mauve tracksuit adorned you jabbed at him. “That tracksuit makes you look like a forty year old virgin, you know that?” He shrugged, bottom lip jutting out. “That’s a fair assumption to make.” You hummed.

Slowly approaching you, he gingerly pulled you into his embrace. “I really am sorry. I didn’t realize until you left how it must’ve sounded for you. You will find your person someday. I will make a more conscious effort to tamp speeches like that down from now on. You know how much I like to talk.”

You both chuckled, savoring the feeling of his familiar arms wrapped around your waist in a way you would never tire of. The words stung, but you knew he was being sincere. As sincere as he possibly could anyways. “Thanks Joshy.”

When he pulled back, his cold hands cupped your cheeks, a large smile adorning his face. That small tooth gap that you absolutely adored so visible from this close. “I love you.” You smiled back at him, hands holding onto his bony wrists. “Love you too.”

Josh remained at your house for the rest of the night.

He asked her only two weeks later. It was a big show he had put on for her. Their style you were assuming. If anyone ever asked you to marry them in that fashion you would’ve said no. It must’ve been perfect for her because to everyone's surprise she said yes.

Only six months together and they were engaged. Of course everyone was expecting a long engagement, but in some sick fluke Josh informed everyone at the same time that it was only going to be two months from their proposal date.

You were shocked to your core. According to Josh, they only wanted something small and intimate and because of that, it could be that quick of a turn around. One interaction. That’s all you had experienced with this person who was going to be marrying your best friend. In two months.

Sitting in Danny’s living room with the other siblings, you were all ranting about the pure absurdity of the situation. “This isn’t even like him! Since when has he wanted to settle down like this? And this fast? No, it’s not, Josh!” Jake’s voice was rising with every word he spoke.

Sitting on the couch, your arms were crossed over your chest, steam shooting from your ears. “Star, maybe you can get through to him! He listens to you.” You shrugged, making eye contact with the worried twin, Sam and Danny sitting there in contemplative silence. “I already tried. He is dead set on doing this, Jake. I don’t know what else to do, but this isn’t good.”

He harshly sat on the arm of the sofa, putting his face in his hands. “Fuck!” He yelled, throwing one of the items from Danny’s side table. “Hey!” He yelled at the action, Jake muttering an apology and retrieving the item to put it back in its spot.

You all sat there for hours discussing the situation at hand and what could possibly be done. The answer? Nothing. There was nothing any of you could do. Grin and bear it. The only way you were ever going to be able to do that was going to be to distance yourself from the entire event all together.

Easy enough. Until Josh approached you with a major question.

“Please, star!” You were eyeing him like you had no idea who the person was standing before you. “Josh, listen to what you’re asking me.” He nodded, somewhat understanding your predicament. “I know, but it would mean so much to me.” Sighing, you rubbed tiredly at your eyes.

“It’s weird, right? I hardly know her and-” he cut you off, slight irritation prickling his tone. “Exactly! You hardly know her and I’m about to marry her. She wants nothing more than to be your friend. Just go to the bachelorette weekend, I will pay for you, and just try to get to know her.”

His doe eyes stared widely at you, hope dancing in his dark irises. “Fine, fine. I’ll go.”

That’s how you got to where you currently are. Sitting in a dark hotel room, a bunch of drunk strangers passed out in the suite living room, contemplating your entire friendship with Josh and if this weekend had been worth it.

The door creaked open, startling you in the darkness, but when she appeared you slightly calmed down. The only person you somewhat recognized from the trip. “Hey, sorry I didn’t mean to scare you.” Putting a tight lipped smile on, you flicked the bedside lamp on.

“No worries. You okay?” She pointed at the edge of the bed, silently asking if she could sit there. Nodding, she sat giving you a genuine smile. “Thanks for being so cool this weekend, I know my friends can be kind of a lot.” You both laughed under your breath. “Ah, they’re not bad. Welcomed me right in.”

Her eyes lit up at that. “Good, good! I’m so glad. I wanted you to have fun this weekend and I really wanted to get to know you. You and Josh are so close and you know literally everything about him which I don’t, you know? You should hear how often he talks about you. Seriously, it’s so intimidating being around you. He has this phenomenal opinion about you and I just want us to be friends.” Your breath caught in your throat at her words, feeling it grow tighter with the praise you learned Josh constantly showers you in when you weren’t around.

“No, I’m none of that. Josh just likes to hear himself talk is all.” She bursted out in laughter, her next sentence making you halt your movements and truly question every decision he had made to get to this spot. “Does he really? I don’t know, he’s kind of quiet around me.”

You didn’t knock, the door was more than likely unlocked anyways. Bursting into his home, he was startled to see you in his house like that, but his mood immediately changed when he saw you there. “Star! How was it?”

“What the fuck is the matter with you?” His eyes blew wide, startled by your anger. “Excuse me?” Shaking your head quickly, you battled your thoughts. “How are you marrying this girl, Josh? You don’t know her! She doesn’t know you! At all! I mean for fucks sake you look fucking insane, Josh!”

He tried calming you down as he approached you. “Star, what happened? Did something happen on the trip?” You walked to him and grabbed his face. “Yes! I realized that I have no idea who you even are anymore. This is not you. This is not like you. You don’t do this shit. This is not Josh.” Your words evened out, but he only grew angry.

Pulling away from your grasp, he exploded. “I know what I’m doing. I’m so fucking sick and tired of hearing everyone bitch at me about this. It is my life! None of you, especially you, run it. I do! You are just the same sad and lonely girl that I’ve always known who tears down everyone's happiness, particularly mine when it has nothing to do with you. News flash, my world doesn’t revolve around you and I pray it never will! I’ve grown and maybe you need to too!”

Tears welled in your eyes, sniffling as your eyes fell downcast. His chest was heaving from yelling, but you couldn’t look at him.

“Okay. Well, then I will get out of the way of your happiness and entirely extract myself from your world then, right? Congratulations Josh. Have a great wedding.” He sighed, trying to backtrack on what he said. “Star, no hold on.” You didn’t stick around to hear anything else.

Nearly every single day Josh had hounded your phone trying to get in contact with you. Showing up at your door nearly every other day with a flower delivery for apologies. Each time he returned, the flowers remained on your doorstep.

Getting to the point where you were almost ready to block his number all together, you watched the days tick by, seeing his wedding date get closer and closer. An invitation having arrived in your mail weeks ago, but landed right in the garbage.

There was no way you were going to be able to actually attend the wedding. Of course you understood that his outburst had been in retaliation for the way you had spoken to him, but the burn of the words had yet to scab.

Danny stood in your kitchen, cutting up fruit as he shook his head in shock. “You have to go to his wedding, star. You can’t miss Josh’s wedding, are you crazy?” Rubbing the bridge of your nose, your eyes were pinned shut. “Drop it, Danny.”

Scoffing in response, he talked as he chewed on a strawberry. “No, I will not drop it. This is Josh we’re talking about. You are not going to miss his wedding. It would devastate him.” Grabbing a piece of pineapple, you took the moment of reprieve to craft your response.

You hadn’t uttered a word of the blowout that had occurred between you and Josh that night. Knowing it was an interaction of high stress and tension, you decided it was best to just let it lie. Sure, it complicated matters pertaining to you not attending the wedding, but it was a small price to pay.

Danny on the other hand knew something was wrong. There was no chance that you would actually miss Josh’s wedding simply because you had feelings for him and weren’t a huge fan of his partner of choice. That just wasn’t you.

Wanting to know the full story, if he pestered you enough he knew you would crack. And crack you did. In fact, it was a decade of turmoil and emotion slamming together in a horrific tsunami that would only leave deviation in its wake.

“God, Danny, why don’t you get it? I have been in love with that boy since I was a child! I pictured everything with him. This is tearing me up to witness this. I try to tell him how I feel and he throws in my face that I am sad and lonely and you know what? He’s right! I am sad and I am lonely. I spent so long holding out for someone that will never love me like I love them. I am tired and I just can’t do it!” Sobs wracked your body, face tight from the shed tears cascading down your swollen face, a shaking mess as you hiccuped.

Danny immediately dropped it, Offering comfort the only way he knew how to, he held you while you sobbed over the reality you faced. Your best friend was getting married in a week's time, you weren’t going to be there, you two had gotten into a knock out drag out fight, and to top it all off you were still alone and sad.

So, what did that leave you to do?

Sit on your couch for a week, self loathing and not offering anyone a definitive answer if you were actually going to attend the wedding or not. Instead, you wore an oversized t-shirt you had owned since middle school, hair an absolute mess, watching reruns of your favorite show that you had spent most of your childhood watching with Josh.

Shooting Danny a text that morning that your will not attend was set in stone, he didn’t tell anyone. Not until Josh approached him and asked if you had rode over with him. When Danny pulled him aside to break the news, you were happy you weren’t there to witness that.

It didn’t matter because he brought it to you.

Pounding on your door, a tuxedo-clad Josh stood on the other side of the threshold. You two stood in silence, his chest heaving as he tried to catch his breath. Taking him in before you, you finally spoke first.

“Aren't you supposed to be-” he cut you off before you could finish, “Yes.” You nodded, blinking rapidly as your eyes fell down. “Okay.” Foot bouncing, you finally moved to the side letting him step into your apartment.

Jaw setting, you couldn’t take your eyes off each other. “What are you do-” he cut you off again. “Are you in love with me?” Swallowing thickly, your head began to move in response, eyes welling with tears, cottonmouth setting in. “Because I’m in love with you.”

Lips parting in awe, your chin trembled, tears silently falling from your eyes. “Ho-how?” You choked out, but Josh spoke loudly and quickly over you. “I was in the room, getting ready to head out to get to the altar and I was staring at this ring,” he pulled it from his pocket as he continued.

“Danny had just told me you weren’t coming and I saw her. She’s there fully ready in her dress, getting some photos taken or something, but I didn’t care. All I could think about was you not being there and if I needed you there that badly then maybe,” it was a shaky breath, hand falling as he held the ring still, “then maybe that meant something.”

Crossing the room, he stood directly in front of you. “I love you, star. You are my light, my being, everything I could ever want or imagine in a partner. You are the person I have to spend the rest of my life with because it just doesn’t make sense any other way. This ring is yours. It was only ever meant for you. There is no one else in this universe who I would want to wear this ring. It’s you, star. It’s always been you.”

Your hand covered your mouth as you choked out a laugh, knowing that Josh was offering you his hand right then. You nodded, a teary yes escaping your throat as Josh crushed you to him in a meeting you wouldn’t forget for the rest of your life.

Some people are destined to be your almost. Because not everyone gets the fairytale ending of being with the person who they thought they were destined to be with. Just because that person might be meant for you, doesn’t mean you’re meant for them. There has to be people who don’t get the guy.

That was what you believed your destiny was to be with Josh. Sometimes things work out in ways you never understand. Instead of being your almost, he was always going to be your forever.

Maybe fairytales weren’t so stupid after all.

#ficthots #josh kiszka #greta van fleet #joshua kiszka #josh kiszka imagine #josh kiszka fanfic #josh kiszka fanfiction #greta van fleet fanfiction #greta van fleet imagine #josh kiszka x y/n #josh kiszka x reader #josh kiszka x you #jake kiszka #danny wagner #sam kiszka

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queen-of-boops · 2 years

Text

Summary: Lucas and Dani have been happily coupled up since Lucas entered the villa, but Nope has other plans...

Written for the @litgwritersroom prompt: re-write Operation Nope.

Rated Teen.

Below the cut or on Ao3.

Huge thanks to @ellegreenwxy for betaing!

“Mmm, something smells amazing.”

Dani giggled as he hugged her from behind, resting his chin on her shoulder.

“Oh, did you want some?” she teased, pushing his plate out of his reach.

“You know better than anyone that I worked up quite the appetite last night.”

She flushed immediately, likely replaying last night’s events in her mind. The two of them had been voted into the Hideaway and Lucas had been determined to make sure it was something she wouldn’t forget anytime soon.

Dani playfully shoved him away. “Sit. Eat.”

Obediently, he took his seat, taking a bite of the pancakes she’d sat in front of him.

“I love it when you’re bossy,” he said, smirking at her.

Her grey eyes sparkled with amusement. Even as she feigned annoyance, those eyes told him all he’d ever need to know; she was happy. Happy with him.

From the moment he’d stepped into the villa, Dani had been the one to catch his eye. For five days, he’d sat in his hotel room, bewitched by this artsy, bold girl he saw on his screen. He’d watched the other guys fall over themselves to impress her, watched as she’d skillfully and kindly rejected all of them. If he was being honest, he was so nervous that she’d do the same to him that their whole first date was a happy blur.

But for some reason, she didn’t reject him. Lucas was terrified he’d do something to chase her away, but it hadn’t happened. Her attention seemed firmly fixed on him, never straying as he integrated himself into the villa.

She just made it so easy. From the very first time she’d smiled at him, she’d made him feel relaxed, like he could actually be himself around her. Dani brought out the real him; he shared parts of himself with her that he’d thought he’d locked away for good.

“Babe?” she asked, a nervous crinkle forming between her brows. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah. I’m great.”

“Ugh,” Hope said with an eye roll, watching as Dani and Lucas made eyes at each other across the breakfast bar. “They’re insufferable.”

Noah sighed sadly, while he didn’t necessarily agree with Hope’s statement, he could understand not wanting to watch them together. Dani was the only girl in the villa who seemed completely uninterested in him. Which only made him want her more.

She was funny and gorgeous. And exactly his type on paper. Noah felt like he could talk to her about anything. But while he’d really wanted to kiss her after she spent half an hour debating the best Toto songs with him, she’d made it very clear that Noah was just a friend.

But at least she’d friendzoned everyone.

Then Lucas strode into the villa, dragging Thor Junior in his wake, and Dani had fallen head over heels for him. To say that stung was an understatement.

“He shouldn’t be with her,” Hope spat.

“Maybe you’re right. But what can we do about it?”

Hope got that look in her eye. The look that said she was going to get what she wanted and no one was going to stop her.

“What if one of us tried to turn their heads?”

“Dani isn’t interested in me,” Noah admitted dejectedly.

“For now. But what if her man was suddenly out of the picture? Then she’d have nothing else to do but come cry on your shoulder.”

She let the idea hang in the air, let it take root in Noah’s mind like a weed. The more he thought about it the better it sounded.

“Alright. Let’s do it. You’ll try to graft Lucas then?”

“Oh hun,” Hope said with a feline smile, tossing her braids over her shoulder. “There is no try.”

The feel of Dani’s lips against his was lingering in Lucas’ mind as he strode through the villa. How was it that in less than a week, this girl had imprinted herself on his life? Even when she wasn’t next to him, he could hear her laugh.

“What’s got you grinning like a schoolboy?” Hope asked, pulling him out of his daydreams. “It’s Dani, isn’t it?”

He noticed that her smile didn’t quite reach her eyes.

There was no point in denying it. He, Lucas Koh, the man who put up so many walls, was completely and utterly whipped. And it had only taken Dani five days to do it.

“Yeah, it’s Dani.”

Hope sighed, sliding a little bit closer to him. “You know I love Dani, but do you really think she’s the right person for you? Or is just an infatuation?

“What are you trying to say?” he growled.

“Lucas, come on. Do you really think she’ll fit into your life?” Hope purred, her manicured nail dragging against his chest. “Dani? The girl who doesn’t know when to stay quiet and thinks fifty pounds is a lot to spend on a pair of shoes?”

A small smile formed on his face as he pictured his father’s face when he brought Dani home. No, Dani was not the type of girl Lucas typically dated. But maybe that was exactly why he was so drawn to her.

“You need someone who’ll fit right in. Someone more…high class. Not that there’s anything wrong with Dani!” Hope hastily added, seeing the anger on his face. “It’s just…you live such a posh life, Lucas. Shouldn’t you give someone else a shot? Someone who wants that life?”

“Someone like you?” he asked, lifting his brow.

“It’s just a suggestion, babes.”

God, he would’ve laughed if he wasn’t so damn angry. Hope was exactly the type of girl Lucas had dated in the past. She was cool, calm, and collected; a force to be reckoned with. Objectively, she was perfect for him, a beautiful, ambitious woman who’d challenge him in every facet of life.

But as he looked at her, her lips parted slightly as she tilted her head up towards him, practically begging to be kissed, he felt nothing.

Because she wasn’t Dani.

“No thanks, I’m good,” he said, stepping back quickly.

He strode out of the living room, leaving Hope behind him, gaping like a fish out of water.

“Lucas! I was just looking for you!” Noah said cheerily.

That was weird. Noah wasn’t exactly unfriendly, but of all the guys in the villa, he was the one Lucas had talked to the least.

“Um, hey Noah.”

“Did Hope talk to you?”

“Yeah, I just left her.”

“Oh, well. Listen, she told me when you came in that she really liked you…”

If Lucas didn’t know better, he’d say that Noah was trying to set him up with his partner. “Uh, cool. Listen, have you seen Dani?”

“She’s by the loungers.”

“Great. Thanks mate!”

Shaking his head, Lucas tried to push the conversation out of his mind. Something was nagging at him though. It was odd, two people coming up to him on the same day to talk about Hope’s interest in him.

“Babe!” Dani called, her smiling making Lucas feel about twenty kilos lighter.

He couldn’t resist wrapping a possessive arm around her waist as he sat down next to her. Nor could he fight the urge to plant a row of kisses on her neck.

“Lucas…people can see us…” she murmured, the breathy pant in her voice spurring him on.

“Let them watch.”

Dani lifted his gaze to hers with a single finger under his chin. “Hey. What’s wrong?”

Of course, she knew something was bothering him. It sometimes felt like she knew what he was thinking before he knew it himself.

“Hope pulled me for a chat earlier…”

Tension flooded her body instantly. Instinctively, Lucas’s fingers roamed over her shoulders, soothing every knot he came across.

“Nothing happened,” he continued. “But she made a pass at me…”

Those striking grey eyes that Lucas loved to see light up darkened with anger. “She did what?!?”

“She was flirting with me, but I shut it down. What was really weird was Noah talking to me after.”

“Nope. Not gonna slide out of this one that easily. Hope tried to make a move on my man?”

Lucas couldn’t fight the smile on his face. It really wasn’t the right time to smile, but he really liked seeing how much she cared.

“Why are you smiling?” she demanded.

“Babe, listen to yourself.”

Dani glared at him, crossing her arms stubbornly in front of her. “I’m pissed off Lucas, I don’t want to over-analyze what I’m saying right now.”

“You just called me your man.”

“Is it too soon?” she asked. All that anger suddenly made more sense, she was scared. There was a part of her that was terrified of losing him.

“Not all. I’m yours Dani. Only yours.”

He watched the emotions play across her face: disbelief, shock, and then pure, unbridled joy. The breath was temporarily knocked from his lungs as Dani threw her arms around him. Laughing, the pair of them fell back onto the lounger in an awkward tangle of limbs.

Heat bloomed in his chest as Dani closed the gap between them, kissing him with an intensity that made the blazing Spanish sun feel downright cold.

Love Island was unpredictable. Things happened that no one was expecting, couples broke up and new islanders came in. He and Dani still had a long way to go until the end, and he knew they’d face their own share of obstacles.

But it didn’t matter. Because she was his and he was hers.

#litg #litg fanfics #litg fanfic #litg fanfiction #litg s2 #litg season 2 #litg lucas #litg lucas koh #litg prompts #love island the game #operation nope

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elephant-in-the-pride-parade · 4 months

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Ever fifth emoji

Ohhh Every fifth emoji?! 🤯💖💖💖 You're spoiling me. ✍ Do you have a beta reader?

I have a lot of different people who have beta'd or offered to beta for me, and I love when I have a beta but I am always a bit hesitant to ask, especially for longer and nicher projects. It's a big commitment to ask of someone.

🎶 Do you listen to music while you write? What song have you been playing on loop lately?

I listen to a lot of music while writing. Most recently. Glitter and Gold (Barnes Courtney), High Hopes (Panic! At the Disco), and The Saints II (Dirty Poor Robins) have all been playing on repeat.

🍷 Do you drink and write?

Previously answered no :D

❌ What's a trope you will never write?

Nope can't answer this one. Look there was a time not too long ago when I thought I would absolutely never in my life write about Threshold. And then @voyagerihardlyknowher when and made the most beautiful AU and it changed my life and look what happened, I wrote a trope I thought I never would. So I can't say there's something I'd never write. Because I have been proven delightfully wrong before.

🎯 Have any of your readers accurately guessed major plot points? Care to share which?

People have definitely guessed some before. I love to leave hints and foreshadowing to see if people will pick up on it. I love when people get it right. I also love reading the ones who get it delightfully wrong.

🤗 What advice would you give to new fanfic writers that are just getting started?

If you get a beta or a commenter and their comments make you want to never write again, that person is doing it wrong, and you can go ahead and ignore whatever they say. Find people who see your vision and inspire you to keep reaching for it. Find the ones who will enjoy how you write right now, or who understand what you actually want help with.

😬 Which of your fics would you be most horrified for friends, family, or coworkers to stumble upon?

Definitely the tentacle fic. I made a whole separate AO3 account so none of you would find that. ;) No regrets.

🤯 What's a genre you struggle with as a writer (ex. romance, action, etc.)?

Undiluted Horror and Fluff aren't my cup of tea. I prefer them mixed into fun cocktails with Adventure/Thriller and Angst and Hurt/Comfort.

#that writing life #elephantwrites #asks #writing ask

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galactic-pirates · 1 month

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For the Fanfiction Writing ask: 2, 18, 29, and 48, please! 😁

Yay thank you for the ask!

2) Where do you get your fic ideas? Ask me at the time and I'll know. Ask me now and I'm not sure. Some are obvious. Like if there's a specific prompt and then my brain chewed on it and lightning struck boom and it coalesced and came together into something.

As you are a Sanctuary friend let's take some of those fics:

Happy Ending = the song "this is the way that we love / like it's forever / and then live the rest of our lives / but not together" and I was like, make it fluffy. I don't know. I was just coming off writing Our Darkest Hour.

Choosing Fate / Time Will Tell = the tropes. I was like let's do an arranged marriage AU. Pretty sure I was watching Bridgerton at the time as well. And then I wanted to see if I could make Soulmates a trope I could like.

Life Without Purpose = for a Zombies in July event

Gentlemen of Blood = I was given the title, and had to think of a fic to go with it. That Bond quote by M came into my head of "when they say they have people everywhere, you don't expect one to be in the bloody room" plus the Sherlock Holmes movies.

I don't know, does that answer it a bit? My brain is a mess and it just needs prompting for it to spark basically.

18) Do you enjoy research? Which fic of yours required the most research? Nope I'm too lazy. I get easily frustrated. If I can't find the answer quickly I get annoyed. The internet is wonderful and I want to strangulate it sometimes. It's like I know the information must be there, but can I find it? It's no wonder I am drawn more and more to making my own worlds, because then I can just make everything up and don't have to worry about if I'm right or not. I just have to be consistent within my own story.

The aforementioned Happy Ending actually took a surprising amount of research, which to be honest probably ruined the fic because once I had all the stupid marriage details, I had to include them because I had bothered to look them up dammit. Haha, I know, why self? Also Odyssey: Future's Legacy had a lot of history in it and I had to make all the timelines line up. Let me tell you timezones + international travel = headache. I'm pretty sure Warehouse 13 never paid attention to travel times on the actual show but I made everything plausible.

29) What’s something about your writing that you’re proud of? Already answered here :)

48) Who is your favorite character to write for? Has this changed since you’ve started writing for that fandom? This is very close to question 41 (here).

Ok well let's go with Sanctuary fandom. I'm going to go left field and answer with Nigel. Which isn't exactly true but I will explain. Nigel is like the forgotten member of The Five a lot of the time. He's the one that didn't live until the 21st century and the one that isn't romantically linked with Helen. There's very little known about him and I was surprised and delighted as the more I referenced him, the more cohesive he felt in my mind. He got an actual personality, backstory, goals etc. So while Nigel isn't a favourite character, I do enjoy how I developed him.

Bonus question as you had a repeat!

11) Do you write scenes in order, or do you jump around? I'm a very linear writer. I literally can't write out of order. Sometimes this trips me up because I think if I sense that something I have written isn't right (aka the foundation is rocky) then I grind to a halt and stop making progress. Now with fanfic which I never tended to revise that heavily, that's fair enough - I'm not going to do a complete redraft but with original work? Ehhh.

It is generally speaking better to revise a complete draft, to see the entire picture. I can't recall where I first heard the expression but I have applied it to drafting ever since - "there's little point in polishing a turd" - aka, I don't know what I'm going to have to cut until I can look at the whole thing, so don't waste time polishing a scene that might not make it. But yeah getting frozen because I have to be linear, but something isn't right, but I shouldn't waste time fixing it - frustrated mental scream!

Oh another point! I have a friend that exclusively jumps around, I don't think they could write linearly if they tried. I have always wanted to ask them, but haven't dared in case they think I'm judging them (and I'm definitely not!), whether they find foreshadowing/thematic arcs/character emotional journey's etc. harder to write as it's out of order. For me, I can't imagine getting my head round it backwards but clearly people do it, so that's a me problem. But yeah no I have to be linear.

#long post #I answer things #sam talks writing

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jerardeusebio · 2 years

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just your typical anniversary rant

Dylan and I have been married many times. At least this is what I know and what I’ve been thinking about as we enter our ninth year of being in a relationship. He is in the shower when I ask him, “When did you know you wanted to marry me?”

We throw the M word around often enough, even if it doesn’t serve a function in our lives. It’s not a touchy subject. We’ve talked about getting married countless times. I’ve even made us a Pinterest board for it. This board is now at least four years old—our little toddler.

“Well, I’m sorry to disappoint you,” he says, “But it’s always been like that for me. I was always looking for a life partner. So, I can’t answer your question because it was more of my disposition.”

I begin to curl floss on my index finger. “I think you’re talking about my disposition, not yours.”“Nope,” he quips. “I was always like that. I wouldn’t have committed had I felt you weren’t husband material.”

I realize it’s Day 2,921 of quibbling over semantics. Okay. I sigh and then reply, “The whole entire world can tell that I’m the more romantic one.” I joke, but it’s true. I have, on many occasions, confessed to him that he’s the love of my life.

“Wow.” He gets the Mariah song reference in my reply. Of course he does.

“Well, then let me rephrase my question,” I say. “When did you realize that we were going to be a lifelong thing?”

“Uhm,” he responds. His hands appears from behind the shower curtain to grab his towel. “Early days.”

“Within our first year? First few months?”

“The first week.”

I bask in the moment. “Same.”

He walks out of the bathroom as I finish brushing my teeth in silence.

At least in the social sense, we’re as good as married. We’ve built our lives around each other and each others’ family and friends. That was a nonnegotiable for both of us, right from the start. But we also know this is not good enough.We still want to get married (not in the religious sense) because we want to enjoy its legal and economic implications. For one, it would be nice to have our assets from hereon be conjugal. We want to be each other’s heir when the time comes. And when faced with having to make tough decisions in the hospital, we want the other to be our default health care proxy. It would be nice if these concerns were automatically taken care of by being married. But since we can’t, and in spite of our impassioned resistance against scarcity thinking and excessive anxiety over what the future may bring, we’ve made attempts to get around these issues by creating a joint bank account, writing our holographic last will and testament, and telling our family about our wishes.

Sometime after our bathroom talk, we find ourselves in bed, browsing Netflix titles on my iPad. We check out the preview of this reality show where men and women are made to date without having them see each other. A literal wall is placed between would-be couples and that’s how they talk and “date.” In the preview, apparently, some of them will get engaged later on. That’s when the fun part starts, too, because then they’ll have to deal with finally “seeing” who they’re engaged with. Drama!

We don’t finish the preview. It is great misfortune enough to be able to easily imagine how a show like that could end, with the winners tying the knot, only to end up being on some tabloid for calling it quits some months later.

“The straights are at it again,” I blurt out.

Dylan shakes his head. "Ridiculous.”

We finally find something else to watch. A comedy. Somewhere between the laughing and the snickering, I get distracted. My eyes move away from the screen and land on our photo on the wall. Taken on Christmas Eve of 2017 at the Angkor Wat, in the frame we are caught smiling as little flowers from a nearby tree fall around us. I sink a little bit, at the thought that we may never get to really marry, that this was it for people like us. We can accumulate property, grow our joint investments, bring the other to the emergency room, travel around the world in matching luggage, buy each other’s parents the fanciest gifts, rescue all the kittens caught in a ditch, bury dead pets together, appear in each others’ family portraits, care for each others’ relatives, nurse each other in our old age, sleep in one bed for the rest of our lives and still never really get to be recognized by the state as a union.

What a fucking joke.

Happy anniversary to us?

#literature

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zephosthefaedemon · 11 days

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Get To Know The Mun

what made you pick up the current muse(s) you have? Well, Zephos is a character I've been writing about for years. She's an OC of mine, which was originally a DND character, turned for the use of rp on tumblr. She has a whole story, with verses dependent on where she ends up, whether that'd be in a HH style world, or if another fandom I can adjust terms for that world. Otherwise I love this girl, and even have a rough cosplay of her.

is there anything you don’t like to write? Mostly don't care for writing topics that end up fetish-y. Sure, smut is fine if done right, but if it's just gratuitous for no reason, I tend to nope out. I'm otherwise not a fan of writing high school au's, I don't know why I just don't. Maybe it bores me.

is there anything you really enjoy writing? I tend to opt for fantastical elements, dark fantasy and folklore I love, along with historical stuff. I also love to write emotionally charged scenes, no matter the emotion, whether horror, joy, budding friendship/romance, betrayal. I like to keep Zephos on her hooves.

how do you come up with headcanons? I wrote the character, so would that mean all my ideas are headcanons? Otherwise, I try to base her off of folklore, fairy lore, old mythology, medieval and renaissance societies, defying authority, learning to open up to new ideas, and learning to break barriers with how one's actions can haunt them, even if the things done were good but are viewed negatively.

do you write in silence or do you play music? If I'm writing a lot then music is playing, but if it's something short, I tend toward silence.

do you plan your replies or wing them? Depends. If the rp is more slice of life I tend to wing it, otherwise if it's more planned I tend to make sure everything is just right.

do you enjoy shipping? I sometimes do, but I don't force the ship to happen if I'm writing it. I want ships if they happen to be natural in my writing, develop by the way relationships should, whether for good or ill, I want to make sure relationship dynamics happen first.

what’s your alias/name? Mod MM

age? 28 on my birthday this month

birthday? gemini

favorite color? Red, black, purple, silver, green, those are my favorites

Favorite song? I'm all over the map, so it can be from sea shanties one day to classical to death metal. It's vibes and lyrics for me.

last movie you watched? The Fox and the Hound

last show you watched? Dreams of an Insomniac Volume 1

last song you listened to? Non Vos Relinquas Orphanos (It's for choir)

favorite food? Too hard to pick, mostly prefer sweets

favorite season? autumn

do you have a Tumblr best friend? I have so many I love here, such as @chainsaw-to-the-heart @poisedpearls @moxxietude @spookyowlman @plate-of-blins @hellcab @wrxthfulguard if I didn't tag you I still love ya, I've just listed a few of my friends here.

Tagged by: @moxxietude

Tagging: @poisedpearls @chainsaw-to-the-heart @spookyowlman or steal!

#faerie dance invite #mover from beyond (Mod MM)

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asinglemagpie · 1 month

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15 questions and 15 people, tagged by @gainux! Thank you, I love doing these too!

1: Are you named after anyone? So I actually found out extremely recently (in the last few months) that yes, I am. I am named after a friend of my maternal grandfather that my mum met once… but she was beautiful and smart and articulate, and that's what she wanted for me, and that was my name from that moment on.

Won't lie, two thoughts occurred: 1, wow I do not live up to my namesake LOL, and 2, did she potentially name me after one of my grandad's many affairs without knowing? (The first I said, the second I kept to myself but OOF…)

2: When was the last time you cried? Approximately 40 minutes ago because there's like 3 songs in the Hazbin Hotel soundtrack that make me cry, including the Finale XDDD

3: Do you have kids? Nope!

4: What sport do you play/have played? I played one netball match, and one basketball tournament - I was more of a dancer.

5: Do you use sarcasm? Constantly. I can't be sarcastic about it because then it sounds like lying lmao.

6: What is the first thing you notice about people? Probably their height. I'm a bit of a wee thing, so I'm always looking up at people XDD

7: What's your eye color? I'm honestly not entirely sure! I lean towards 'hazel' these days.

8: Scary movies or happy endings? Both - sometimes I need everyone to die, sometimes I need everyone to live.

9: Any talents? I can't dance any more, but I can still sing.

10: Where were you born? Cambridge. Closest I got to that university… XDD

11: What are your hobbies? I write again now! That takes up a lot of time between fic, novel, and RPing. I listen to music, loudly, and sing along whether it sounds good or not lol. I watch a lot of TV and movies, there's always something on in the background, and I like to try and watch a lot of non-English things too. I want to try going back to practising playing the flute again, and get back to reading… I've really fallen off the wagon with reading. There's a billion crafts I want to do and I'm set up for most of them, I just have to DO them which… yeah, we all know how that goes XDD

12: Do you have any pets? Sadly my only pets are my Furblets.

13: How tall are you? I am 5'4.

14: Favourite subject in school? Drama. I loved it, and did well in it. I started having severe memory issues in 6th Form which was very obvious when I suddenly couldn't remember scripts from one minute to the next, but through that and a whole host of other hardships I still managed to come out of it with top grades.

15: Dream job? Best selling author whose series gets turned into an award winning TV show or movie series with a ton of mech possibilities? Lottery winner?! In all seriousness… something I can support myself, my mum, and my partner with.

Tagging: @caspercryptid @heaventhing @lozzykins @neon-slime @rainbowd00dles @teawiththegods @theoi-crow @tonguetiedsmeghead @walnutgoat ... and anyone else who sees this and wants a go <3

#Dancing with the Pied Piper #Don't know why the tags are refusing to work half way through so hopefully you'll all see this XD

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ardent-fox · 1 year

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Tag Game Masterpost

Got tagged by some wonderful humans, including @celestialmickey, @energievie, @creepkinginc, @metalheadmickey and @look-i-love-u to complete these fun tag games, thank you and spring blossoms to each of you! 💐💙

********

✨️ Tag Game Tuesday Wednesday ✨️

Name: Lyds ⚘️

Age: 34 for another 4 weeks or so 🗓

Where in the world are you? Europe, middle of nowhere📍

The meaning behind your URL: 'Ardent' is one of my favorite words, husband calls me Foxxy cause of my red hair, also it sounds like 'ardent fucks' together so cheeky win 🍑

Your second favorite color: Dusty pink 💕

Any pets? Jasper the bun 🐇

Favorite season: Spring, I feel as if I'm in love with the whole world during it, it kicked in earlier this year and I'm absolutely fine with that 🌸

Last thing you read: Galladrabbles. My brain has been doing its cute thing where it can't focus on reading or writing anything longer than that for the past few weeks 🙃

Last song you listened to: I played the Crazy Ex Girlfriend soundtrack while getting ready to go out, so Gettin' Bi (which has become an anthem of mine ngl) 🎵

What are you wearing right now? A hoodie with a crumbling print of a tattooed and pierced out princess Jasmine taking a selfie, black sweatpants and socks with chihuahuas wearing Santa hats on them, my go-to sexy at home look 😅

A hobby of yours: Writing fanfiction and planning our home makeover, both usually taking place only in my head 💭

Your comfort show or movie: Got several, going with Pride and Prejudice (the 1995 BBC miniseries) this time 📜

And finally, what are you up to today? Had a monthly supply of hay delivered to me this morning, went to a job interview that went surprisingly well, did some chores and now I'm chilling here 😎

********

✨️ Tag Game Fandom Edition ✨️

Your name: Lyds 🌸

Your age: Still 34 😅

Your first fandom(s): Not sure what qualifies, but probably House M.D. 🩺

Your current fandom(s): Though my hyperfixations are always changing, Shameless/Gallavich is the only fandom I actively engage in 🧑🏼‍🤝‍🧑🏻

How did you first get into fandom? I was part of a Tim Burton/Johnny Depp RPG message board where I played 3 characters and we also used to write what I now realize was fanfiction on the spot over MSN. A bunch of us were obsessed with House M.D. and someone must have mentioned fanfiction.net to me cause I got hooked on reading Hilson and Huddy stories around the same time 👀

How long have you been engaging with fandom spaces? The RPG/House era started in 2008, but I didn't become active on Tumblr and AO3 until getting involved in the Shameless fandom as of April 2022 🗓

How often do you read fanfics? When my brain is in the right place, I'd say a couple stories a week 📱

Top 3 characters from your current fandom(s): Ian gallagher, Mickey Milkovich, Castiel (still going through Supernatural and loving every bit of it) 💙

Have you ever written a fic for a fandom? If so, shout it out! Yes, still at one completed ficlet and a Galladrabble collection on my AO3, not counting the 5-6 WIPs I have in my docs 📂

Have you ever drawn fanart for a fandom? Nope, can't draw to save my life 🙃

Share a personal headcanon that you feel very strongly about: Probably not the most original one, but Mickey never liked his full name until Ian stated he thought it was beautiful. Him using it in his wedding vows is symbolic of him reconciling with the darkest parts of himself and accepting them before offering his whole self to Ian, a declaration of love for both of them in his own way. The fact that it somewhat mirrors the act of him apprehensively coming out in front of his own hostile audience, only to confidently show his self-acceptance and love for Ian in front of their favorite people 6 years later is just icing on the (wedding) cake 💖

You’re trying to convince a friend to get into your current fandom(s) with you. What episode, clip, or scene are you showing them? The "I can explain this" scene when Mickey gets shot in the ass and the social worker appears at the Gallagher house, it's peak Shameless madness 😄

And finally, what does fandom mean to you? A sanctuary of creativity and comfort where we can all be, make and enjoy whatever we want, the closest thing to utopia there is 🫶

Tagging @ian-galagher, @sickness-health-all-that-shit, @gallawitchxx, @gardenerian, @squidyyy23, @juliakayyy, @whatwouldmickeydo, @auds-and-evens, @thisdivorce, @sleepyfacetoughguy and whoever sees this and would like to play! ✨️

#thank you all for tagging me over the last two weeks #decided to catch up on only these two games since there's too much to keep track of #tag game #tag game masterpost #fandom friends #about me

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my-moony-and-padfoot · 6 months

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Get to know me :) In a very detailed manner and all of this totally unnecessary and unneeded

(I found these random questions/"get to know me" thingies from Pinterest and left out a few things) I just wanted to do this because I'm hella bored and definitely shouldn't be studying

Definitely not

First name: Guess 📚

Middle name: Maria

Nickname: My friends call me Grandma, Gran and gran-gran.

Age: 16 soon seventeen omg

Height: 165.5 cm

Birthday: 31 of July

Zodiac sign: I'm a Leo ♌

Sexuality: Pan 🍳

Fave color: light pink, light purple and dark green

Fave animal/s: dogs and cats, foxes. Red pandas are cool too and reindeers. Oh oh and turtles

Pets: three dogs and four cats (in two different places tho)

Shoe size: 38-39 EU

Hair color: dark red

How long is your hair: down to my shoulders

Eye color: blue green brown ish something I really don't know, they're weird. They like often change colors weirdly idk what's up with them. So, I usually stick with saying they're green

Do you have glasses: I do 🤓

Any siblings: half big sister and half big brother, so technically one right?

Where are you from: That there is a mystery 🌎, unless you're fucking Sherlock, or another fictional detective, or a stalker

Last dream: A nightmare of my grandma trying to kill our whole family

Fave book/s: One of the harry potters and heart stoppers. Also I love this Norse mythology book I have

Last book you bought: Loki: where the mischief lies

Favorite hobby/hobbies: writing and crochet 🧶. Also I really like DND 🎲

Favorite game: Sims 4

Fave song/s: We made it - Louis Tomlinson, Hated - YOUNGBLUD, Call your mom - Noah Kahan and Boy in the bubble - Alec Benjamin (I'm sorry I couldn't pick just one)

Favorite artist/s: Louis Tomlinson (he's mainly on my play list) and I also like Harry styles

Last song you listened to: Family line - Conan Gray

Fave movie: Harry Potter Goblet of fire, I don't really watch movies 🎥

Religion: I'm a Christian, like I belong in the church but I don't really believe into anything, but I respect everyone who does <3

Have you been to the hospital: A lot when I was a child, last time was because of my knees

Ever gotten in trouble with the law: Nope

Met any celebrities: I've met a few YouTubers, does that count?

Baths or showers: Showers. Definitely showers 🚿

What color socks are you wearing: white with light purple stripes at the top

Would you like to be famous: not really no

How many pillows do you sleep with: Two, well one the other one just is kinda there but it's never under my head, it's to prop the other one up

Do you own stuffed animals: I do 🧸

If you do, how many: Six, can't sleep without one of them (it's a bunny). I lied there's seven

What position do you sleep in: The Superman position, y'know? 🦸‍♂️

What do you eat for breakfast: I don't eat breakfast, sometimes coffee though, coffee with oat milk is the best

Ever tried archery: I actually have, was my hobby for a year or something, spoiler alert; wasn't very good at it 🏹

Ever fired a gun: Nope and won't

Favorite clean word: fluffy, it's nice to say

Favorite curse word: Fuck, I say that way too much someone help me

Longest you've been without sleep: 23 hours

Have any scars: I do, a surgery scar on my knee, one on my upper lip from my teeth going through it, small one in the corner of my eyes, a lot on my knees from falling down as a kid so much, and then some others

Are you a good liar: I think I am

Can you do any accents (besides your own): Not really and I don't have that much of an accent, I think

What is your personality type: from the 16 personalities INFJ-T 🌛

Can you curl your tongue: I can, I can also do the flower thingy

Left or right handed: right handed

Are you scared of spiders: Sort of, I don't mind them as long as they're not near me

Favorite food: lasagna and tortillas

Are you a clean or a messy person: Messy but in an organized way 📦

Most used phrase: "No shit Sherlock" "no wayyy" "just...why?"

Most used word: Probably some curse word... Or "what" "why"

Do you suck or bite lollipops: Bite 😬

Do you talk to yourself: all the freaking time

Do you sing to yourself: I do, everytime I listen to music alone 😶‍🌫️

Are you a good singer: I'd like to say that I am, but I don't actually know

Biggest fear: someone murdering me (during the night with a knife), dislocating my knee, or any other part that can be dislocated (it hurts so fucking much, cannot recommend)

Can you name all the states: Maybe probably, haven't tried

Favorite school subject: Psychology or English 📖

Least favorite school subject: MATH, and chemistry, physics is sorta alright but I don't like the math part

Extrovert or introvert: Introvert

Have you been scuba diving: Nope, probably never will go 🤿 deep waters scare me

What makes you nervous: Literally everything

Are you scared of the dark: not anymore, unless it's outside, sometimes it's scary inside too, but not too often

Do you correct people if they make mistakes: Sometimes but not to be mean to them, but not like minor mistakes, unless I wanna annoy someone

Are you ticklish: Not really 🪶

Have you been in a position of authority: I've been a scout leader for the past three years, can't do it anymore tho, does that count?

Have you ever drank underage: Once because my sister forced me to, A glass of champagne how rebellious of me

Ever done drugs: Nope

Ever smoked anything: Nope x2

How many piercings do you have: I have earrings and snake bites 🐍

How fast can you type: Somewhat fast, I'm faster on my phone than on a computer

Are you a fast learner: Depends on the subject, but usually yes

Can you roll your R's: No I cannot 🐐

Do you keep a journal: Every now and then, I'm not very consistent

Do you like your age: ✨Sweet sixteen✨ It's fine, I don't really care I'd honestly rather be older ⚰️

Do you like your name: I think it's very pretty, I used to hate it tho when I was young (still kinda do, most of the time). It's fine but I just don't like using it with people

How did you get your name: From my mom and dad lol. No it "tells a story" and it suits well for English which my mom wanted, it's somewhat rare here where I live. With the spelling I have

Dream job: I have zero clue 🔎

What was your first job: A week at a daycare. But my first actual job (something I got paid for) was in a coffee shop for a summer

What places have you worked in: In a daycare and a preschool and two summers in that cafe, never going back there it was horrible

Last show you watched: Chicago med 🩺

Last show you finished: What we do in the shadows

Favorite show ever: Big bang theory, Chicago med and 911. Oh, heartstopper :)

What is your earliest memory: Sitting on a dresser and my dad telling me to wait for a bit, or being on my mum's shoulders while she was doing something outside (I'm not sure which one is first)

Happiest memory: Moving away, getting into the school I wanted with good grades

When did you start this blog: May-June 2022

When did you start writing fanfic: January 2022 (Rhe next few ones a writing related because they were in this one list of questions I found)

What was your first fic: Fred Weasley/reader definitely not with a self insert *cough cough.

How do you come up with ideas for writing: They just come up when I try to sleep, or am doing something random, or something happens so I just write it out. I hate brain storming with all my heart because nothing good comes up when I try

What character/s do you enjoy writing the most: Sirius and Remus <3, but lately I've fallen in love with Percy and Oliver and starchaser is always fun to write

What character do you not enjoy writing: Any authoritative figure because it's hard and when there's multiple characters because it's hard to keep track

Is there a fic you regret writing: Not really, I mean I'm embarrassed of some of my writings, but it just shows that I've learned and I can write better now :)

Favorite thing you've written: "When I..." A long fic about a suicide attempt and it was very comforting to write, but then I think I've written a few good hurt/comfort fics. There's like very small bits of the stories that I absolutely love, and loved to write

What do you like to write: Hurt/comfort and just sad things, I feel like I'm good at it. I like descriptive writing too and I've been trying to work on it lately

What don't you like writing: Smut, I feel a little cringe when I write it, and like longer fics, I feel I can't come up with a good enough idea for a one 🤔 Also, I don't have the patience for that

Favorite characters: Sheldon Cooper from the big bang theory. Sirius and Remus obviously, regulus, and then I like the Weasley twins... There's honestly too many that I like. But to mention a few more: Nick, Charlie, the art teacher I can't remember the name of from heart stopper. Loki <3. Will Halsted and Sharon Goodwin are the best characters in Chicago med, fight me.

Do you keep a journal: I have a few pages in the back of my calendar for bullet journaling

One bad habit: self deprecation, I apparently do that too much. Source: my friends

What did you want to be as a child: I really wanted to be a chef or a baker

Who's the last person you held hands with: My friend when dancing, if that doesn't count, then with the same friend at a school Christmas party cause I almost lost them in the hallway 'cause there were a lot of people. Before that, no clue

Are you outgoing or shy: Shy with new people. I'm shyly outgoing lol

Who are you looking forward to seeing: My bestie haven't seen her in over a year

What does your most recent text say: "Alright :)" Another one cause it was around the same time but to a different person. "It's just a little guy"

Do you have trust issues. Oh yeah

Favorite part of your daily routine: Everything cause it always goes the same way. We love structure over here

What do you do when you wake up: Turn off my alarm if it's on, then I go through the notifications on my phone and just lay there doing random things before I gotta get up. Usually reading actually if I have enough time and oh, always listen to a podcast/music

Do you like your neighbors: I don't really know our neighbors 👀 except the ones I dog sit for. Oh at least one of our neighbors thinks I'm creepy. (Literally steered their kids away from me while I was coming from school.)

Is your hair long enough for a ponytail: it is, I just often don't keep it in one. Unless it's dirty or I'm alone and need it to get it out of the way

How many languages can you speak: Two (actually three but I'm really bad at the third one) I picked french for next year tho :)

Can you cook: Yep, I'm quite good at it. I can bake too

Last time you cried: A few days ago because I was feeling like an absolutely horrible human being

How long does it take you to get ready: Like 10 minutes lol ⏱️

Favorite number: 5. Five is the Ultima number, and everything either ends in five or is divisible by five. I've always liked the number five :3

Alright 😮‍💨

That was quite long, Sorry about that, I just like questions :)

If there is something you wanna know for some reason, feel free to ask. Like I said I like questions.

I might write more things here, if I think of something or find something fun

Feel free to use these if you want, I just want to note that most of these I did not make up myself and I don't know who did.

Enjoy this I guess I just got inspired and stopped studying for this, anyone I can blame on my English grade after this 👀

Also there's almost hundred of you following me, that's so weird....

#get to know me #questions #get to know the blogger #get to know the person behind the blog #get to know you #fanfic writing #writing #thoughts #this was my procrastination #i'm procrastinating #this was fun

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sweetmilkbread · 11 months

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Thanks for the tag @kulliare!

1. Were you named after anyone?

Nope! Not that I can think of. Though my url is named for the delicious bread I had all the time as a kid!

2. When was the last time you cried?

The exact date was May 30th lol. I remember it because me and my friends got together to watch the succession finale and when it got to the ending, (especially the music! Andante Risoluto gives me chills!) I teared up.

3. Do you have kids?

I don't! The idea of being a parent was never really my thing. But I'd always love to be a parent to some pets!

4. Do you use sarcasm a lot?

Yes. When I'm around people I know, at least. Otherwise, I try not to use it.

5. What sports do you play/have you played?

Oh, this question is wasted on me lmao. I was the least sporty kid to exist, hated my phys ed classes and always made my team lose for everything. I have terrible balance and co-ordination skills so most sports are just not for me, but deep down I've always wanted to try out martial arts of some kind!

6. What's the first thing you notice about someone?

Hm...I'm a pretty self-conscious and socially anxious person, so I'd probably be busy panicking over what the other person thinks of me tbh 😭. Though something else I do notice is eye colour! Every kind of eye colour is so pretty!

7. Eye colour?

Brown

8. Scary movies or happy endings?

Ohoho I love a scary movie! Give me a scary movie any day! I have such a fondness for horror movies and books. I finally watched The Lighthouse (2019) today and I loved it!

9. Any special talents?

At one point, years ago, I knew the whole Gary Come Home song from Spongebob. But in German.

10. Where were you born?

A hospital.

11. What are your hobbies?

Reading and writing are my immediate go-to's! They are both things that I've found solace in from a young age and I love doing them so much. I've been reading some really wonderful work lately (I'm a big Carmen Maria Machado fan) and it's pretty neat. Apart from that my hobbies are probably boring lol. I also love watching movies and TV shows, listening to music, cross-stitching and making mini zines.

12. Do you have any pets?

2 dogs! Both of whom I love with my whole heart!

13. How tall are you?

5'3....on a good day

14. Favourite subject in school?

English! (Yes, I'm predictable). But I also really loved my music classes. Even if I can't listen to Mozart without picturing all my study notes in my head.

15. Dream job?

This is a tough one. Maybe this is a cop-out, but ideally something that just pays the bills and lets me make enough to live happily. My absolute dream job though would be becoming a published author of some sort? Though it's way out of my league and probably doesn't pay extremely well unless you're lucky lol 😭 I can barely stick to a posting schedule for my fanfic, nevermind writing a whole book!

I haven't been on tumblr long (embarassing) so I don't know lots of mutuals, but I'm tagging @citrusgothic, @surfledblues and @iamcalmiamthestorm, if you want to join in the ask game (no pressure tho!) x

#ask box #sort of ask box #I need to refine my tags one of these days...

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old-daemon-farts · 1 year

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Rhea gets her spotlight

I know at some point Cayde and Rhea were trying to answer questions but it's been a bit and I don't even remember what those questions were! May have been the 30 days of daemonism challenge. But now Rhea wanted to try her hands at the 100 question list. She can only answer in small burst so there will be another couple post added later on.

1. What is your name? What is your human’s name? My full name is Rheasilvia but I go almost exclusively by Rhea. My daemian still goes by Kit. 2. How did you get your name? Kit wanted my name's origin to be Greek like her irl name. So we browsed through different mythology stuff until we saw Rhea and knew it was perfect. Many years later we discovered the name Rheasilvia in a game and then found out it's a real astrological name as well! So it became my formal name. 3. Do you have any nicknames? What do you like to call your human? I call Kit, Kit. Rhea is technically my nickname I guess but Kit likes to call me "her heart". 4. What is your gender, if any? Female with she/her pronouns 5. How old are you? Do you know your CIE date? I'm seven as of writing this and my CIEday is Jan 18th 6. How are you feeling right now? Excited! I'm always excited when I talk. I use to be so much calmer, but I came to love and appreciate so much about life that talking and being here brings me so much joy that I don't know what to do with myself. 7. What is your favorite time of day? Oh this is so tough. I like mornings I think. When it's too early in the morning you want to stay in bed and cuddle, but it's also the beginning of the day and holds so much potential. Time to get up and do things! 8. What is your favorite time of year? Spring. Absolutely Spring. 9. What is your favorite activity? Baking! 10. What is your favorite food? Does it differ from your human’s? Even Kit doesn't know her favorite foods! But I love smoothies, and fruit, and cakes! 11. List five of your favorite songs, and five of your human’s favorite songs. I'm only going to list a few of mine if that's okay. They may not be my favorites but I do like them!

Lost Boy by Ruth B.

Tulip by Jessica Hoop

Try by Colbie Caillat

Drum Go Dum by K/DA

Who's laughing now by Ava Max

12. Who was the last person you talked to, other than your human? Em of Thom and Ani 13. If you could change one thing about your human, what would it be? Not a single thing. Flaws and perfections all, I love who she is. 14. If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be? I want to be purple. Oh wait I can do that whenever I want! 15. Are you affectionate? Very! 16. Are you introverted, extroverted, or in-between? Hm. I think I'm a social introvert. I love people and talking to others but the majority of the time I need quiet alone time. 17. Do you like to meet other daemons? I love seeing other daemons! I don't socialize all that much but I love seeing everyone around. 18. Do you have any friends, excluding your human? I do! At least 5 other humans and only three of them are daemians. 19. What do you do during a conflict? Nothing. I don't like conflict. I kinda hide until it's done then pick up the pieces after. 20. Are you happy with the amount of time you are projected currently? Considering I was gone for a whole year I am very happy with how much I'm being projected right now! I don't need to be around ALL the time. Little bit is good. 21. Do you have a favorite quote? If so, what is it? Nope, nothing in particular. But I like repeating different positive phrases a lot. 22. What is your favorite word? Purple. Oh wait you said word not color. Well it's my favorite word now too. 23. What is your favorite memory? My memory is so fuzzy but anytime I sit on Kit's head as a bluebird, thats my favorite memory. 24. What is your favorite thing about your human? EVERYTHING. But probably her heart. 25. What is your favorite thing about yourself? That I get to show the world how kind and wonderful Kit's heart is.

#daemonism #about us #100 questions for daemons #Rhea

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monstersliveinthemirror · 9 months

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The Guts Write up Nobody asked for

1. Out the gate with beautiful vocals in All American Bitch. The acoustic intro is interesting and catchy, but when it hits with drums and electric guitar, the song picks up so much. I love her almost punk sound in the chorus, especially the second chorus. This one definitely hits pop rock and it's incredible. The drop to the acoustic at the end is -chefs kiss-.

2. Bad idea right? Is THAT bitch. The sound is incredible, but let's talk lyrics. "My brain goes Ahhhh" is such a mood when you think about that ex you aren't over. "Yes I know that he's my ex but can't two people reconnect I only see him as a friend biggest lie I ever said" This whole track is just a love song to making bad decisions around exes. Let me just say it brings back every single time Alex showed back up in my life and we would be "friends" until the whole line of "I just tripped and fell into his bed..." SONICALLY this song is interesting and upbeat, it's just so good.

3. I don't really have much new to say about Vampire- what a beautiful song about a fucked up time in her life. I love the interesting music and changes in the song. It's catchy, it's just good. It's been good since it came out.

4. Let's talk about the bisexual anthem lacy. It's yet another song for the girlies who don't understand the difference between jealousy and attraction AKA me in high school. The lyrics in this one are silly to me, I think describing skin as puff pastry is so ridiculous, but it's such a vibe for being a teenager and thinking someone is perfect and being jealous. "I despise my rotton mind and how much it worships you" IS NOT A STRAIGHT THING.

5. This one immediately starts off gritty and is almost whiplash following Lacy. The chorus has such a neat and interesting sound and I'm so glad she took a risk with the punk leaning sound for this album. This is another song that makes this album the pop rock genre. I love how upbeat it is, it's a bop and a dance around your room with headphones pretending you're the lead singer of a band song. I will say I don't love the part where it slows down, but I'm glad it picks up and doesn't end with a slower part.

6. Making the bed physically hurt me. I feel personally attacked by the lyrics. I'm not sure I can talk about this. "Push away all the people who know me the best, but it's me who's making the bed. I'm so tired of being the girl that I am every good thing is turning to something I dread, I'm playing the victim so well in my head, but it's me who's been making the bed." Fucking ouch okay. "I got the things I wanted it's just not what I imagined" 😭 it's a perfect mid album song, slowing it down for a minute after lots of energy.

7. I don't have words for logical. Love song to the girls who have been in toxic relationships with men who take advantage of the ones who fall hard. This is an Alex song and I hate it but "you've got me thinking two plus two equals five and I'm the love of your life" I mean come on the WAY people convince you of lies. "Why do I do this, I look so stupid" is the moment of realizing that you were hoodwinked but somehow you still feel for them even though you know better. The whole outro of blaming yourself is just heartbreaking and I am unwell right now okay.

8. Alright back to it with some drums and gritty sound. This one has a great vibe. The chorus is everything to me. Upbeat I hate this man I'm gonna fuck up his life, the break up song for us girlies who knows we aren't gonna get closure but like we're ready to take it. The whole vibe of I want to make him hurt....but with the confusing aspect of wanting to make him feel better by being the one he turns to...nope I want revenge except I want him back FUCK. The perfect song for that confusing part of the break up where you're almost ready to move on but not really.

9. Love is embarrassing is a mood lol. The dumb shit we do when we think we're in love, the way we don't really have boundaries or know what we'll put up with yet. I appreciate the sound and how catchy the song is. I also love the pretty abrupt ending.

10. Alright, slow it back down. We've got the signature acoustic and Olivia's beautiful voice for this one. It seems like it's going to crescendo, but it doesn't quite get there. Lyrically, "I fantasize about a time you're a little fucking sorry" got me. "How could anybody do the things you did so easily" I am unwell. This song made me emotional about a fucking break up that happened almost a year ago. Fuck this. I am hurt. ~you know I can't let it go, I've tried I've tried I've tried for so long~ and it just ending...ugh so good.

11. Pretty isn't pretty starts strong. The sound is good, the lyrics are honest. It just addresses growing up a girl and developing self worth issues and is probably one of my favorite songs here because of the topic. We drop from worrying about relationships and just address what it's like when it feels like nothing is ever good enough. It's not my favorite based on sound, but it's good enough.

12. Ending on a sad note, I see. This one is a coming of age song and not understanding there is so much good ahead. You're just nineteen babe you've got so many better days to come. But at twenty eight I felt this. It's saying goodbye to younger days, "they all say that it gets better, it gets better but what if I don't" screams mental illness to me but I'm probably projecting my own issues. God I love how it picks up because it's such a big feeling. She did a great job of using music to set the mood in this one. Also the outro, the baby sounds the mom sounds just God fucking damn.

#guts #Olivia Rodrigo #personal #don't come for me having opinions

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bl00dycoten · 2 years

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STOP WAIT IMAGINE WRITING ANGST ABOUT FUCKING ASTRONOMY BY CONAN GRAY WITH EDDIE OR STEVE STOP IM SOBBING.

authors note: STOP YOU KNOW WHAT THIS IS GOOD. I LOVE WRITING STORIES WITH SONGS BEHIND THE PLOT IT GIVES ME 10x MORE IDEAS.

ps. this isn’t as short as k thought but that’s okayyy, rushed ending might change later, first one but i tried enkoyyyyy🫶🏼

steve harrington x gn! reader, slight eddie munson x gn! reader( just ‘friendly’ flirting)

warnings: spoilers for stranger things vol 1., angst angst angst, no happy ending, cursing, blood, fighting, reader is second choice, insecurities (? alot of comparison to nancy), steve being in love with nancy. one shot, First story so sorry.

summary: You and steve used to have a thing together in middle school, for mutual reasons you ended things in your freshman year and his sophomore year, you stayed friends and at some points it seemed as if you two never even broken up, until steve met nancy and started dating her in his junior year, it soon went back to the way things were after him and nancy broke up. You knew by then that you didn’t have his heart anymore, Nancy wheeler did. After nancy broke up with steve, you tried to win him back and it was working, until now.

Fading stars

You watched as Steve stared at Nancy while she patched him up from the demobat attack, you could already hear your heart breaking in your ears, all you could do was turn your head off to the side and bite your lip anxiously. You knew Steve, he only ever looked at you like that, well before he met Nancy Wheeler in highschool. His eyes only had that sparkle in them when you would walk into any room he was in, when he would think about you and how your day was going. But ever since he met Nancy and started dating her, he only gave her that look then, and it seems like he is doing it now too. He didn’t think about how he was with you, way before he even met Nancy wheeler.

He didn’t think about how he still treated you like you were the only person in his life, or how he acts like you have his whole heart, just to be slapped in the face by Nancy wheeler when she is in the same room as Steve, all of the moments you had with him, was nothing compared to the moments he is having now with her. It hurt but why are you so upset? you both agreed to break up that day and you also both agreed to stay friends. yes but how could you not fall back in love when he treated you like you were the only person he wants, you would give him twice as much, people would suspect you both were together, but you would laugh it off and say ‘nope, just good ol’ friends!’ even though you wished it was more, you never asked steve if he as well wished to be more again because you knew he wouldn’t, no matter how sweetly he will ever treat you, you know he is thinking of doing the same with her. Eddie noticed you’re change and looks at steve and nancy as they look at eachother as if they are the only people in the room. he takes off his jean jacket and throws it at steve, breaking their trances.

“for your modesty, dude.” eddie said and walked off to you. Steve slowly put on eddie’s jacket as he watches the man walk over to you. Nancy had went over to talk to robin who was going on about steve having rabies. a little while past and suddenly the ground was shaking, an earthquake. Eddie had grabbed onto your arm and pulled you into him as you both fell to the ground from the harsh shaking. Steve grabbed nancy and robin holding onto them as they all try to keep their balance.

“shit, what was that!” steve muttered sacredly and looked around. “uh i don’t know ? probably a fucking earthquake, steve.” robin muttered frantically going on about her fear of earthquake’s. Eddie had gotten up and picked you up off the ground. “are you okay?” he asked. “yeah, thank you, you kind of took the fall for us both.” you laughed and cracked your fingers, a nervous tick you developed in middle school. “well yeah, can’t just let a pretty thing like you fall down, now can i?” Eddie smiled, you froze and let out a nervous laugh. “you think i’m pretty?” you questioned, even though steve has called you pretty countless of times, it never seemed to equal the pretty Nancy wheeler was, steve was also the only one who ever called you pretty besides you parents. “uh yeah? i have eyes you know.” he put his fingers up to the sides of his eyes and waved his fingers around. you laughed at that and nodded your head. “yes, you do have eyes Munson.” you and Eddie continued to have small talk with each other, while Steve looked at the two of you talking and laughing, a bitter feeling was growing in his stomach as he continued to watch the interaction between you two, robin walks up to him.

“what are you staring at so hard Stevie boy.” robin whispered and laughed while taking a seat besides him. “i don’t get it, why are they laughing so much? Munson isn’t even that funny.” steve grumbled. robin raised an eyebrow then began to laugh. “what? why are you laughing?” steve said and made an annoyed face while turning to look at robin. “oh my god! is Stevie boy jealous?” robin teased and elbowed, making sure not to elbow his bites. “huh? what no!” he huffed and smacked her arm away from him.“no offense but i thought you were hooked on Wheeler.” robin blurted out and mumbled a quick apology when steve snapped his neck to look at her again. “w-well i mean i’m not hooked on Nancy, i just might still have feelings for her?” he tripped over his words, running his hands through his hair, he looks back down at the floor and sighs.

“well if that’s the case, why do you care so much about who makes Y/n laugh so much?” robin questions. “because they’re my best friend, of course i’m going to care about who their potential partner is.” arguing back with an annoyed huff leaving his lips. “best friend? oh please you guys treat each other like an old married couple. when i first met you i thought you guys were dating.” robin admits. “we um, we dated in middle school, ended things mutually on my sophomore year.” steve fumbled with his fingers now, he’s never talked about his feelings much, so it was awkward for him. “so than are you saying that you still have feelings for them?” robin asked while tilting her head. “n-no! they are just my friend. i just um..i just like how they treated me when we were together. um nancy didn’t treat me like they did. but i still love nancy, i don’t know, sometimes i just look at them and imagine what it would be like if that was how nancy treated me and that we actually, um stayed together you know?” steve grew more anxious as robin stayed silent after his little rant.

“um, robin listen just forget i ever said anything okay, it was stupid.” steve mumbled and lightly combed through his hair. “that’s pretty damn selfish steve. i mean no offense but did you ever think about how Y/n would feel if they knew that? and here you are being jealous when you should be happy they are moving on from you. you cant get the best of both world steve, Y/n doesnt deserve to be a replacement for nancy just because you didn’t work. i mean hello? what about Y/n’s feelings what if they still harbor some feelings for you and all you are doing is leading them on just because-“ robin’s rant was cut off by steve. “just because i wasn’t with nancy, yeah i got it robin, jeez. i didn’t mean to hurt Y/n if i have, i just thought i was still in love with them, uh until now.” steve looked down ashamed. “you should let them be happy. you are only fueling a brunt out fire. you guys had the chemistry yes, but maybe it just wasn’t meant to be now.” robin smiled softly and patted steve’s shoulder. “listen to my words, man.” robin pointed at him and left to talk to you and eddie, bringing up the topic about how to get out of here.

“how do we do that when steve just got snacked on like he was a snackable!” eddie yelled and pointed at the bloody bodied steve. “theoretically, we could go to the police station and steal guns and grenades and whatever we need to blow up those bat things that are guarding the gate.” robin mumbled and nervously bitting at her nails, overthinking the whole situation as they begin to plan things. “robin dont bite you nails.” you mumbled softly and held onto her arm pulling it down and holding it. robin stoped overthinking for a while. “I highly doubt the Hawkins PD has grenades, Robin. But guns, yeah, sure.” Eddie mumbled and played with his rings while Nancy walked towards you, Eddie and robin. “Well, we don't have to go all the way downtown for guns. I have guns in my bedroom.” Nancy announced.

“You, Nancy Wheeler, have guns, plural, in your bedroom?” Eddie made a surprised face as he pointed a ringed finger at Nancy. “Full of surprises, isn't she?” steve proudly said as he walked over, wanting to join the plan. it stung as you seen steve casually act like his side was hurting just to rest his arm around Nancy’s shoulders. “A Russian Makarov and a revolver.” Nancy replied casually not caring about the arm over her shoulders.

“Yeah, you almost shot me with that one.” steve said teasingly. tilting his head to the side and downwards, looking Nancy in her eyes, noses almost touching. “You almost deserved it.” Nancy teased back, it seemed like they were leaning closer and suddenly a gust of wind past, which caused you to get the chills and Eddie noticed so being the gentleman he was, he took off his leather jacket and gave it to you. “here you go pretty.” he said as he slipped it onto your shoulders.

Steve had snapped out of his trance and pulled away before their lips could touch, eyes looking towards you and Eddie. “Oh my god!” yelled robin out of nowhere after she felt like a fifth wheel. “So guns seem like a pretty good idea to me.” robin mumbled and nervously looked between eddie and steve, who were both having an intense staring contest. “Yeah, me too.” Y/n mumbled awkwardly. “So what are we waiting for?” robin perked up, looking at nancy. “lead the way, wheeler.” Eddie said, breaking eye contact with steve and began walking when nancy pointed which way to go.

“Y/n.” steve mumbled to you as you five walked through the forest in the upside down to get to the Wheeler house. “Y/n. Hey, babe. uh.. listen i just. i want to talk about everything.” steve asked, as he walked besides you. “what is there to talk about steve? i think we both made our statements pretty clear.” you finished, not wanting to talk about how shitty you love life was when you were stuck in an alternate universe. “i just-“ you cut steve off. “why do you keep trying steve? honestly i am really curious. you like to treat me like i’m the only person you ever treat like this, and that i’m the only person who holds your heart but then nancy shows up and all of a sudden it’s all about her again. you can’t just do that steve, it’s not fair that you keep giving me false hope when i know we would never be able to last anyways. we want two different things, you want Nancy, and i want you, or i did want you, i don’t know if i still do, it’s confusing okay? i really think you and i are worried about the wrong thing right now steve.” after your little rant, you gestured to the forest around you.

“woah, who said i wanted Nancy!” steve tried to back himself up but he knew himself, he did in fact want Nancy. “oh please steve don’t even. your eyes give you away. the sparkle in them when you look at her, you used to look at me like that, that’s how i know you still want her.” you stopped walking for a second, letting steve walk ahead of you until he stops and turned to look at you. “steve, i just think it finally time you stopped treating me like you still want us to happen when you know we won’t happen again because that isn’t something you actually want now. we just couldn’t fall in love with each other, that’s okay i’m sure we have our person out there somewhere. just treat them right steve, don’t make them feel like an option when Nancy enters your life again, cause i’m sure no one wants to go through that heart ache.” steve reached out to grab you hand. “Y/n i do like you tho.” “but you don’t love me? you never say it, steve.” you muttered and sighed. “look steve, i don’t want to argue, we are on two different worlds, you’re playing with a fire that burned out years ago steve, let it stay burned out.” you said the last sentence with annoyance and walked towards robin, who was more in the front, leaving steve alone with his thoughts. Steve realized than maybe all the stories he read about your childhood love being everlasting, wasn’t something steve harrington would experience, no life was definitely not a fairy tale with a happy ending were you get with steve, when his love for you faded along with the relationship you oh so wished for again.

#steve harrington x gn!reader #steve harrington x reader #stranger things x reader #stranger things #snakes oneshot

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