#yall should use an emoji w your asks!!! i love seeing you guys use my stuff it makes me rlly happy | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

sungbeam · 2 years

Note

xnonie present to wish YOU 🫵😳 a happy birthday! even tho it's only been a few days, i really enjoyed talking marvel with u 🫶🫶

THOSE ARE AWESOME POWERS! i almost completely forgot about pym tech (sad, i admit) but yeah the entire concept of it is so cool. i'm so in love with paul rudd & scott lang in general its not funny </3 I AM A WANDA DEFENDER UNTIL THE END!! so what if she was scary in multiverse?? she was pretty while doing it 😍 if they could just make her happy for once that would be nice 😭😭

RED DAGGER BEST MS. MARVEL LOVE INTEREST!!! yeah ur right the other guys can leave SLDHDJS kareem radiates so much love interest energy & the tension between him & kamala?? exquisite 💗💗💗 i also ended up finding fics for him on tumblr (there are a handful, btw)

I DID WATCH MOON KNIGHT!! oscar isaac was phenomenal for giving us steven grant, marc spector, AND jake lockley all in one mini series. IT NEEDS A S2. during the airing of the show, i may or may not have stumbled upon khonshu thirst edits on tiktok?? THAT WAS SOMETHING. IDK IF I WANNA RELIVE THAT. IT WAS FUNNY BUT ALSO... COME ON GUYS, ITS A BIRD SKELETON 😭😭

OMG BEAM. U GAVE ME THE GREATEST GIFT OF ALL TIME ?!?!? IT SHOULD BE THE OTHER WAY AROUND, ESPECIALLY ON YOUR SPECIAL DAY ☹️ u shouldn't have!! i'm SO excited. DINO AS QUICKSILVER?!?! SIGN ME UP. I LOVE OUR TIGER KING HOSHI AS WOLVERINE IT FITS SM SHDKSJD (why can i imagine yelling "HORANGHAEEE" while pouncing on someone w/ his claws out? LMAO) and wow... HAO AS MAGIK?? AND GYU AS COLOSSUS?? idk if i can take it anymore 🙏

i made something for wol-ranghae when i saw that hoshi = wolverine but then realized that anon asks can't send pictures 😭😭 maybe when the fic is up, i'll reveal myself just to send u what i made 🫣

AHHH THANK U XNONIE !!! lmaoo why does that finger point emoji look so accusatory 😭😭😭 BUT YES ME TOO I'VE LOVED TALKING ALL THINGS MARVEL W YOU 🥺🥺

pym tech is so cool and so is paul rudd too TRUE (ﾉ´∀｀*) he's so underrated i just sighs,,, give him an oscar guys and call it a day ._. bUT YEAH SAME !! WANDA DEFENDER FOREVER like yeah u bring in an EXCELLENT POINT XNONIE !! just let the woman be happy?? Õ_Ó is that too much to ask ?? all she does is suffer.

BAHHAHAHA I can already imagine the amount of updated masterlists to mcu fanfic accts after the mcu Disney+ shows (ﾉ´∀｀*) that's so slay tbh like we got red dagger, moon knight, druig, and NOW DAREDEVIL !! okay he's deffo not NEW but the thirst has reawakened for most, but in my case, it has been discovered 😳😳 WAIT FR JAKE LOCKLEY EXCUSE ME BUT IF I DONT GET A SZN 2 I WILL RIOT !!!! WAIT THERE R W H A T EDITS ??!? y'all,,, khonshu huh 💀💀 i mean, i really am not allowed to judge, but ... okay. u do u ig :/ HE IS A BIRD SKELETON PLS YALL 😭😭😭

NAUUUR SEEING UR REACTION IS A GIFT ENOUGH FOR ME :(( U BEING EXCITED MAKES ME EXCITED BFF !!! YESSS OMG THATS KINDA WHY I THOUGHT IT WAS FUNNY HOW I PAIRED TJE MAKNAES BAHAHAH like i gave verkwan arguably some of the most powerful mutants in the verse, and now we can clown chan as a mutant as well (^_-)-☆ /j dkdndkjf im kidding lol i have a severe attachment to quicksilver, but chan just fits the mold whoops and TOO MANY PEOPLE SLEEP ON QUICKSILVER !!! YES OMG YELLING HORANGHAE IN ATTACK MODE HAHAHAH that's so hoshi plss 💀💀💀 i was like,,, who's the most furry-esque mutant? wolverine 😃😃 and i figured we could easily fit hosh w that since he too wishes to be a furry w claws called a tiger or something 🤡🤡 YEP HAO AS MAGIK AND MINGYU AS COLOSSUS!! i thought that fit pretty well :0 tbh one of the hardest people to pair was hao!! i knew i had to find someone who could be as slayfully cool as him

OMG U MADE SOMETHING FOR WOLRANGHAE AHAHAHAH I WISH I COULD SEE IT 👀👀👀 but yuhh when i finally get round to writing and posting this thing do send it in (^_-)-☆

#sungbeam strikes again #xnonie 💥

2 notes · View notes

regular-nessian-trash · 4 years

Text

It’s Vegas, Baby - Chapter II

Summary: Nesta goes out to the store and so does Cassian. Classic Nesta, she thinks he’s stalking her. Trust me it’s more interesting than it sounds lol(I hope)

Word Count: 2k

A/N: I'm back on my grind yall *sunglasses emoji*

Nicknames:

Feyby- Feyre(its supposed to be like feyre and baby put together cause shes the baby of the family)

Nestella- Nesta(its supposed to be nesta and nutella. u will learn more later;)

Tiny Ancient One- Amren(kinda self explanatory)

Mor Boobiez Plz- Mor(idk i just thought it was funny lol)

"I'm home!" Nesta calls out to Feyre. She can smell pizza and instantly strides towards the kitchen, where she finds Feyre with a large cheese pizza still in the box, half-eaten.

"Finally! I was beginning to wonder if you and Cassian finally acknowledged the sexual tension between yourselves and fucked."

"Feyre! That is not appropriate to say at all! Cassian and I are barely colleagues, we will never be anything so stop with your meddling!" Nesta replied, trying to will down a bright red blush. Feyre and her boyfriend, Rhys, had this insane idea that she and Cassian were made for each other, it didn't help that Cassian was constantly flirting with her either.

"We're back!" Mor and Amren had just gotten home from some party, with Mor holding Duchess, their shared Chinese Crested Dog. When the four of them bought a penthouse together Feyre and Mor wanted a dog, and Nesta and Amren didn't. After begging and pleading with her sister and friend to please give him away after they adopted him they finally decided to just lock her, Amren, and Duchess in a room together. They all became friends, and they found out that Duchess was, in fact, a boy. They had been calling him Duchess for too long, though, so when they called him Duke he wouldn't reply so the name just stuck. When the rest of their inner circle found out-"the rest" being Cassian, Azriel, and Rhys- they didn't stop teasing them for days. In their defense, he had a very small you-know-what and he was a very ladylike boy.

"Bring my baby boy to me! Oh I wove you so much you wittle cutie pie!" Feyre was letting Duchess lick her face, making Nesta gag. Sure she loved the dog, but seriously, he licks his butt.

"Ugh, Mor, your cousin is working me to the bone! And he won't stop trying to push me and Cassian together! He thinks he can push us together just cause we “have hella sexual tension”! Also, I was thinking about this last night, Rhys is dating Feyre and if I'm Feyres sister and he's Cassians brother, that's literally incest!"

"You know they aren't actually brothers, right? They're just best friends." Mor replied, trying not to laugh at Nesta's flustered expression. She put down Duchess and reached for a slice of pizza. Everyone knew that it was just a matter of time before Nesta and Cassian got together. Nesta and Mor were the only single people in the house, not including Duchess. And Mor was just recently dumped so she was in a big love life meddling mood. Amren was dating some guy named Varian, and Feyre... Well, let's just say that it's a miracle that she's here right now and not out getting nailed by Rhys.

"I know that, but still. They refer to themselves as brothers."

"So you're saying that if they didn't call themselves brothers you would have sex with Cassian! I knew it!"

"No, Feyre, I am not saying that! Besides, he flirts with everyone so even if I was into him- which I am not - we probably wouldn't become a thing."

"Keyword being probably." Mor says with a smirk.

"Enough of all this bickering, I'm hungry and bored so someone turn on the T.V. while I make some popcorn." Amren quickly breaks them up before Nesta tears off someone's head.

~~~~~

Cassian pulled up at the townhouse he shared with his brothers. All the lights were turned off which meant that Az was sleeping, or not home. The former was more likely because Az usually got pizza on his rest nights and there were three cold slices of meat lovers pizza left. Cassian was so hungry, he ended up eating them cold. He fought back a moan at how delicious the pizza was. He would never understand how Nesta was able to be a vegetarian. Shit. He had been such a dick to Nesta earlier. She was genuinely concerned about him and he had just pushed her away.

Cassian pulled out his phone and checked instagram. Mor had posted a photo of her and Amren with their dog, Duchess, at a party. He didn’t know if he should laugh or cry at the fact that a misgendered dog had a better social life than he did.

~~~~~

“Ugh, Feyre, Tomas and his little gang showed up at work last night.” Nesta and Feyre were chilling in the kitchen, the latter making a breakfast spread that would put Disney Channel moms to shame. Amren and Mor were nursing killer hangovers, so Feyre made sure to bang around a ton in the kitchen.

“Again? A-fucking-gain? Nuthin new, nuthin changed? Same old shit. Same old fuckin shit.” Feyre replied, forgetting that Nesta had no idea what that reference meant.

“I told them to leave and that I almost had the money to pay them back, but Tomas just slapped my ass and said ‘sEe YoU oN yOuR nExT sHiFt’ then he got up and left.”

“You do realize that we could end all of this by just telling Rhys? I know you have this whole thing about your pride and shit, but we could tell Rhys and he could pay off all your debts to him.”

“Feyre, I appreciate it, but I need to fight my own battles. I got myself into this mess, so I sure as hell can get myself out of it. Plus, I don’t like the idea of feeling like I owe my current employer money.”

“Nesta, sweetie, I love you… BUT YOU NEED TO PUT YOUR DAMN PRIDE TO THE SIDE FOR LIKE, TWO SECONDS AND ACCEPT HELP!”

“FEYRE-”

“Okay, can we yell about Nesta's issues at some time other than 6am? Also, is that bacon I smell?” Mor walked in holding her head and wearing one of Nesta's sweatshirts with some leggings.

“Yes, fattie. And it’s like, 10:30.” Feyre slapped Mor's hand away from a stack of pancakes cooling on the countertop.

“And I do not have any issues, Mor. I’m not the one that went partying with a dog last night.”

“Nesta, that is exactly the reason why you have issues. If you went partying with Duchess, maybe you would loosen up a bit. God knows you need it.”

“Brat.” Nesta threw a piece of toast at Mor's head.

“Thanks! Hey, Feyre, pass the butter.” Feyre slid the butter across the counter and cursed loudly when it just slid on the floor at Mor's feet. Facedown.

“Really, Feyre?” Nesta said in an exasperated tone.

“I’m sorry! I thought she would catch it!”

“That was our last stick of butter, you absolute dingbat!” Nesta sighed and picked up the keys to her car.

“Where are you going?” Mor asked, ever the worried friend thinking she had caused a family feud.

“To the store. We need more milk and eggs anyways. Tell me if you guys are gonna go out while I’m gone.” Nesta walked out the door of their spacious apartment and made her way over to the elevator, pressing the ground level button. She stormed over to her car, got in, and slammed the door shut. On her way to the store, she noticed that one of the local book stores was having a sale. She tried to ignore the voice in her head telling her that she had piles of unread books in her room, and all over the other communal areas of the apartment. She would just pop in after picking up the groceries. No big deal. She could restrain herself. Maybe.

~~~~

Cassian woke up and made his way down the stairs towards the kitchen at 10am.

Hey sorry don’t be mad but here’s the shopping list. I had to go out.

~Azriel

“Unbelievable.” Cassian sighed and picked up the piece of paper attached to Azriel's little note and crumpled it up. Then he uncrumpled it because he remembered he needed to see what it said. Cassian walked up to his room and threw on a sweatshirt, some slip-on vans, and grabbed his keys. He couldn’t remember why they decided to share groceries. He wanted to in the beginning, but now that he woke up without any food in the house because his brothers had eaten all of it he was thinking or re-evaluating that decision. Cassian slid into his car and made his way to the store.

~~~~

When Nesta pulled up at the store she checked her phone and saw that Feyre had sent her a text while she was driving.

Feyby*: heyyyyyyyyy nes can you pleeeeeeeeeease get me some chocolate while you’re out :)?

Nestella*: k. anything else? im walking in now by the way

Feyby: nope! thank you love you! :)

Nestella: love you too

Nesta made her way towards the dairy aisle and picked up some 2% milk, a pack of four sticks of butter, and eggs. She quickly walked over to the candy aisle and began studying all her options, she took candy selecting very seriously.

“Nes?”

~~~~

Cassian walked into the store and quickly picked up all the stuff on the list. Once he got to the last few items written he realized he wanted ice-cream for a movie night with the boys. He walked over to the dairy aisle and picked up a tub of cookies n’ cream right when Nesta Archeron stormed past him towards the candy aisle. He followed her because, well, he wanted to talk to her. But he needed to act like he wasn't stalking her cause she might yell at him.

“Nes?”

“Mother Above, Cassian! You scared the shit out of me don’t you dare do that ever again!”

Oh well.

“How did you not hear me coming? Are you really that focused on chocolate?”

“I’m selecting some chocolate for Feyre, and she is very picky so I was focused on reading what the ingredients were in each bar.” She seemed to have recovered from the scare because she just grabbed a random chocolate bar and stormed past him.

“Obviously you don’t care that much if you’re willing to just grab a random bar and walk away!” Cassian yelled at Nesta. Some other shoppers began to stare at him so he quickly said “Don’t worry, we work together. I know her, I’m not some random creep haha.” That just got him more strange looks though so he just made his way towards self-checkout and paid for the items and skirted outta there.

~~~~

Nesta was so embarrassed while walking away from Cassian. People were staring at her! Ugh, Cassian needs to learn to not yell in public places. She walked over to her car after checking out and loaded her groceries into the boot. She needed a black iced coffee stat. Nesta began the quick drive to one of the local coffee shops and once she arrived she quickly sent the girls a text letting them know where she was.

Nestella: hey bitches im getting coffee you hoes want anything

Feyby: i want a mocha frappe pleeease

Tiny Ancient One*: just get me a black americano girl

Mor Boobiez Plz*: i wanna iced coffee with whipped cream and caramel

Nestella: okay for everyone except Mor cause wtf that's not even an item on the menu

Mor Boobiez Plz: it is i swear! just ask them for it they did it when i asked!

Nestella: fine

“What can I get for you?” The guy working the register asked in a very monotone voice.

“One black iced coffee, one black americano, one mocha frappe, and one iced coffee with whipped cream and caramel sauce.”

“We don’t do that last one-” Nesta gave him a withering glare and he immediately changed his mind on what he was about to say.

“Those will be ready soon ma’am. Can I get a name for the order?”

“Nesta. Thank you.” Nesta walked over to the opposite side of the counter to wait while their coffee was being prepared.

“That was quite impressive the way you scared him into doing what you wanted him to, Sweetheart.”

“Cassian! Are you stalking me? Go away.”

“I’m not stalking you, I’m just here to get some coffee.” He smirked at her and picked up a latte that was set down beside him. He took a sip and looked Nesta up and down before smirking and saying “Hot.” he winked at her and left before she could yell at him. If he was being honest the coffee was actually the perfect temperature, but he just loved getting under Nesta Archerons skin.

20 notes · View notes

inkth · 7 years

Text

boyfriend jimin

꒰ bts as your boyfriend: soft!series ꒱

summary: more loving/shyer couple and not the most emotional w each other but touchy (not in gross pda way but more gentle soft way) & whenever you guys look @ each other honey and love drips from your eyes he literally is so taken for you!!! jimin is that mochi that is head over heels, heart eyes 24/7 ready to die for you, fight for you, love you endlessly

phone contact name: jimin 🍡

u call him your prince

obsessed with his satoori (and for good reason) so u ask him to use it and he always does for your weird obsession

also lots of emojis and cute abbreviations when you guys text

ur both very bashful kinda like lambs but you guys can be outgoing and diff esp w the boys around and definitely a bit different in bed

u both looooove finding out new stuff about each other everyday – he keeps trivia about u in his mind or jots it down in his notes

“oh! you like that game! i didn’t know…“ and when u turn away: *opens notes and quickly types in new facts*

u use lots of 🐶 emojis for him and 🥊 in reference to that ONE. TIME. one!time he did the punching bag scene in danger…

u just wont let it go it was just too good hun we dont blame u

lots of hugging, u guys practically walk around hugging

you guys have ur moments when you can easily shake off the nice facade and tease each other w insults in satoori (lmao this one is good)

likes to send u lil doodles and drawings (this boy is so talented freakinfjdjdj)

he’s reminded of you in small little things like tea or flowers

you guys watch the notebook together like all the time

he’s very precious w u and likes to send gifts back home when away nd adores everything abt u from your hair to your eyes and smile

very into cuddling at night he always is touching you, arms slung over your upper body or waist or just hugging you into his body

tugging on your hand is also common occurrence u like to rest your head on his shoulders or chest

likes calling u his princess

you’re just his everything and he tells you everyday

when he first met you it was so obvious it was love @ first sight he couldn’t even control himself and kept repeating things he already said and kept trying to keep the conversation going and then u both were laughing at him about his own mistakes w his eyesmiles on full display u were so gone omg

obvious he’s in love bc everything he does is for you and wont ever shut up or stop thinking abt u & what ur doing the other boys are TIRED.

“should i clean my room? ehhh i dont feel like it. im so tired i could just fall asleep. oh gosh but imagine what y/n would think of me in this mess i should clean it in case she comes over for any reason i might as well shave a bit too and clean the toilet” *brings out 24 cleaning supplies and the big guns: guk* “guk scrub the toilet for me i have to do the laundry” *confused guk holding soap and a scrubber w gloves on stares at wild disheveled hyung whomstve has wild eyes and a sudden burst of revitalized energy at eleven pm when he was complaining the entire car ride home abt how exhausted he was*

you guys rarely have moments where u doubt the others’ love but when u do you guys like to have deep conversations about why the other shouldns’t feel that way followed by v romantic and slow and loving s*x and cuddling and maybe a few tears bc dammit u just love him so much and he loves you

u always try n support him in concerts and shows n stuff bc u know hes rlly self-conscious abt his voice n he says when ur there it helps nd remind him hes just as valued and important as every other member when hes going thru his rough time n yall depend on each other but in a healthy way

“DO YALL HEAR THAT IT’S THE VOICE OF AN ANGEL YESSSSSSSS MY PRINCE! HE RULES THIS WORLD!” *staff backstage staring at you like ur crazy*

take turns grocery shopping n u guys would both go together but found out as the other stays home to clean its v systematic in a good way

he loves facetiming u so much when hes away omg

“let me see ur outfit i miss seeing you in the mornings”

“i sent u an ootd pic????”

“LET ME SEEEEEEEEE YOU AGAIN”

he always texts u before u leaves the studio or dance practice room bc he knows u worry over his safety

on rainy days u have tradition making tea and then in bed cuddling watching a movie

he likes to boop ur nose a lot and then smiling bc ur so cute n he strokes yr hair!!!!

he sees your face in the stars above and tells you how much he misses you when it feels like he can’t take it anymore

:: i posted this on my twitter for bts festa week but i tweaked & added a few things to this…… i just really enjoy doing these types of posts and keep in mind these series will NOT be the only type of posts ill be uploading like this :) i plan on having my fics and these “others” type posts :D

#jimin #boyfriend jimin #jimin bts #bts jimin #jimin drabble #bts drabble #jimin scenario #bts #soft jimin #jimin fluff #WHAT ARE THESE EVEN CALLED #?????????? BTS BULLET POINTS?????? I NEED THESE TO HAVE A NAME #bts as your boyfriend #series

62 notes · View notes

saintkimora · 7 years

Text

ok, here is a full account of what happened yesterday and the new events from today. caleb if you are seeing this please respect my privacy and stop reading now

ok so it started the other day. caleb texted me at night saying he wanted to talk to me about something serious the next day. i asked what it was about and he said he just wanted to be friends but i didnt read too much into it bc he is impulsive so i figured he would come to his senses the next day

so then yesterday happened. i had just gotten out of sociology at like 10:40am and i saw that he had texted me all these things about breaking up. then when i got to my car he called me on the phone. he then proceeded to break up with me over the phone. his reasoning was that since hes prob moving in a few weeks, he wanted to stop being boyfriends now that way when he does leave itll hurt less than it would, so like easing himself out of the relationship basically. i think its a stupid idea

so these are the issues i had. the first was that he broke up with me over the phone, not even in person. and like i was crying over the phone and his tone was just like very cold and detached and business like and that really hurt me bc he obv knew i was crying but i didnt feel any sympathy from him whatsoever. like if he was crying i would obv be comforting him and trying to make him feel better not talking like a robot. another thing that hurt was that he gave up on the long distance relationship before we could even try it. it made me feel like i was so worthless and unimportant that he didnt even feel like putting forth the effort to make our relationship work. and the fact that he did this all over a 10 minute phone call on his way to the gym. and then like 20 min after he had the NERVE to post a video on his snap story of him at the gym saying “feeling so good *blushing smile emoji*” like that really hurt my feelings and when i told him that later he was like “oh stop making everything about you it was just how i was feeling after working out” but like? i know he obv wasnt saying that he felt so good about breaking up. but what bothered me was that like after he broke up w me, i was a mess i was literally crying all day and i couldnt do anything but cry i was so upset. and then here he is just going on with his day like its another normal tuesday. like the fact that he was capable of being so happy not even a few hours after breaking my heart made me feel like i was nothing, like it was just an errand like “oh im gonna break up with perry then go to the gym lol” and the fact that he did it over the phone just made me feel so insignificant like i was nothing to him and that really hurt. and like ive tried to be the best boyfriend i can be for him and i try to do everything he asks of me so for him to just break up with me in such a dismissive way makes it feel like he doesnt even care

so i was crying in my car, like really bad like i was BAWLING. so i went to the student counseling center and asked for a crisis meeting and i got set up w this counselor named josh. he was nice and tried to help me calm down and focus on orgo. it was nice to have someone to talk to i guess

so then i went home. he called me again to like try to explain himself but only made me feel worse. he was like “you know when i move im not gonna be able to see you everyday and cuddle with you and fall asleep on your chest anymore” and that just made me sadder and i was crying again on the phone. then later we were texting and he was like denying breaking up with me. like, you said you wanted to just be friends and you explicitly said that you didnt want to be boyfriends anymore so how is that not breaking up??? and he said “i was trying to have a conversation with you but all you did was cry.” with the period to show how serious he was. and it really hurt me when he said that bc it felt like he was mad at me and using me crying against me, like i somehow did something wrong by crying. again if he was the one crying i would not be holding it against him like that so i really wish he didnt say that bc it made me feel bad for being emotional which should not be something to feel bad about. and at the end of the call he didnt say i love you like he always does so that hurt my feelings as well

and like i took away the hearts from his contact name and changed my phone backgrounds since they were pictures of him and that just made me really sad

i skipped psych and anatomy lecture but i couldnt skip my anatomy practical. i cried when i was backing up my car to leave bc i saw the “hi <3″ that he wrote in the dirt on my back windshield a while ago and it just set me off. so i got to school and i was planning on having this be the dropped grade so i wasnt like worried but i got a 90 anyways so that was nice. the prof was like “perry whats wrong you look depressed” and i was like im just a little sad today and he was like why and i was like “bc my significant other broke up w me” (i used s/o bc idk how my prof is about those things so i didnt wanna say bf). he told me this story about how in his senior year of college he had such bad mono it was misdiagnosed as hodgkins disease so he was given 18 months to live and his gf of 4 years left him after finding out. so he told me “perry, girls are like a bus. if you miss one, another one will come along in 15 minutes. if i had daughters i would tell them the same thing about guys” so that was nice that he tried to cheer me up. then when i was leaving from the other room (bc we leave our stuff in the other room during the practical) the TA came to me from the main room and wished me luck on my finals so that was nice of him

so then i went home. then at 10pm i met w caleb in person in his car. we talked and at first he would not let me get a word in and he just kept defending himself and what also upset me was that he thought the reason i was so upset was that he was moving and he was so defensive like “i wish i could stay here but i have no choice i cant afford to live here its too expensive” and like that is not what upset me!!! i already knew he was moving ive had time to accept it what upset me was how he broke up w me for no reason w almost no warning and did it in such a cold way. and like the way i see it is since hes leaving instead of easing ourselves out of the relationship to stop us from getting hurt when he actually leaves (which wont happen bc itll hurt regardless), i figured we should make the most of our time together and enjoy each other as much as possible since we’ll have plenty of time to get over each other AFTER he moves. so when i told him my point of view he was like “i wish i thought of it like that, im really bad at this” so that was how i resolved the issue. he was hesitant about keeping the bf label but i told im i really wanted to and i didnt see a point in taking away the label now anyways. i also told him i at least wanted to try long distance instead of giving up before it even happens. i dont remember what he said to it though lol i was too emotional. but yeah the beginning of the convo just felt like he was berating me and i started to cry again bc i dont like it when hes rude to me like that

then he told me that im so sensitive i could see a squirrel in the road and cry and i had to explain to him that i am not a sensitive and emotional person! im normally v reserved w my emotions like ive only cried maybe 3 times the past 8 years and that im just emotional when it comes to him bc i care about him so much

another thing that bothered me was that he said every relationship teaches a lesson, and from ours he learned not to rush into things. i dont get that bc yes we did rush but that wasnt really a bad thing? like he wouldve moved regardless so taking things slow wouldnt have changed that. and like since we rushed into things it will hurt more when he leaves since we are closer than we would be if we took it slow but also like, if we didnt rush we wouldnt have gotten so close and had so much fun together in the first place. so imo the benefits of getting so close so fast vastly outweighed the pain of him leaving

so everything would be great except for this next part. he told me the easing out of the relationship thing was bc he got the advice to do that from his mom and leeann. so when i got home i made a post calling leeann toxic and his mom stupid for interfering in our relationship. and like yall can tell that obv i was kidding and just exaggerating for humorous effect like i dont really think his mom is stupid or that leeann was toxic, just that their advice in the situation was bad. but caleb texted me this morning being so rude calling me disgustingly disrespectful for saying that and he said that “next time you think about doing this remember how it felt when i dumped you (so he admitted that he did dump me) - and get those tissues ready” (since ive been using a lot of tissues since i was crying so much). that really really hurt my feelings bc 1. he is once again using me crying against me and 2. it shows a total lack of sympathy for me crying, like it felt like hell yesterday i was so upset and he knows that so for him to threaten to put me through that again just shows he doesnt really care about me or my feelings.

he also said i need to stop using him and leeann and his mom as “characters in your online stories” like...these arent online stories? this blog is where i vent and talk about my feelings since i dont have anyone to do that with irl and i need to get them out somewhere im not writing these posts to be mean it just feels good to put my thoughts into words instead of bottling them up and even my therapist thinks its a good thing for me to do

so he said that but i was NOT having it. i typed up a long text in response and even i admit it was kinda mean. like in his he said “dont even talk to me for the rest of the day” so at the end of my text i said “dont talk to me ever i am perfectly fine w never talking to you again the rest of my life so bye have fun in new hampshire or whatever” and he was like “perry stop you dont mean that last part” and then he called me and once again got defensive he said he was just trying to have a convo w me and i was being aggressive for no reason. like, no??? a convo would have been texting me like “perry i know its your personal blog where you post your feelings but this post upset me and this is why” not coming at me with 4 super rude texts out of nowhere. so he was trying to play the victim and paint me as irrational and that im overreacting just like he did yesterday and i didnt like it! he was just dismissing my feelings again. so i went OFF in this phone call like wow i really snapped and it felt good tbh

like i think he was just expecting me to sit there and take it and apologize like i usually do when he gets like this but i am done doing that! so i think he was caught off guard that i stood up for myself. i was like caleb i really dont care i have the most important orgo test of the semester today you already took yesterday from me but today i am not entertaining it if you have an issue call me after my test” and i ended the convo and hung up and then he texted me “good luck on your test” like ok hi king of passive aggressiveness

so thats it. i felt good at first but later on i felt bad so i texted him apologizing for snapping at him but i said i wont discuss the tumblr issue until we are in person. i asked if he was free tonight and he said no he wants a day or two to be separate and normally i would understand but like...hes moving in a few weeks i really dont want to waste time fighting and being in this weird place

not to be out of order but another thing that got on my nerves was when we made up last night. he said “once i move youll have more free time for things like school, work, maybe going to the gym” like once again here he is commenting on my appearance! like yes i know im scrawny and i wish i wasnt but im sick of him taking jabs at my looks like my body, acne, and eyebrows when i literally have NOTHING but nice things to say about how he looks. it makes me feel bad when he points out my flaws like that and a good boyfriend is not supposed to make me feel like that

now for the most recent development. leeann sent me this LONG fb message bc caleb told her what i posted about her. like why does he have to expose me like that! i didnt read the message i was like “yeah im not reading this but just so you know i was kidding i wasnt serious i was exaggerating lol” and she was like ok lol

i just dont know why she thinks i care about her input on MY relationship? like youre calebs friend not mine to be frank i dont give a fuck what you think about whats best for my relationship like you dont know me so mind your business

and thats another thing. in the past caleb has gotten pissed at me for sharing our business too much (by telling my friends (who he will literally never meet since they all went away for school) and by posting on here) yet here he goes telling leeann everything! seems hypocritical to me

and heres a second thing. i have always told caleb that my blog is my personal space where i can safely vent and talk about my feelings and that he should respect my privacy by not reading my personal posts. and ive told him that if he does wanna read them then hes doing so at his own risk bc im not going to filter myself bc this is MY space not his so if he really wants to overstep his boundaries and look at my posts then he cant get mad at me for them bc HE is the one choosing to read them even after my warning! so i dont think he should be getting mad at me especially when i was in such an extreme state of mind yesterday since he put me through the worst day of my life for no reason which literally couldve been 100% avoided if he had just waited to talk to me in person instead of breaking up w me over the phone. and like now i feel like this isnt even a space place for me to express myself anymore since theres a chance of him seeing. and i tried blocking him before but he made a new blog and wont tell me the url so i cant block him smh

so yeah thats everything that happened. im kinda stressed rn w this whole leeann drama even though he shouldnt have been reading my posts in the first place. like its just so much drama and i dont like how it feels and idk why this relationship turned sour so fast and i wish he would just be nice and sweet to me again. so hopefully things get better

#this is so long omg #if any of you actually read all of this or even just skim it i love you <3 #personal

8 notes · View notes

tfw-no-tennis · 3 years

Text

mtmte liveblog issue 12

lets do itttt

I love nick roches art...he draws rodimus so twinky, its a delight

ohhh I forgot abt the non-linear storytelling this issue. bangin

rewinds feet don't even touch the ground hhhhhh tiny

i fuckgin love that panel of skids talking abt briefing vs debriefing, everything both he and rodimus say is just golden

I love hearing tailgate tell completely made up stories from his primal vanguard days, that slaps storytelling-wise

HHHHHH and the fact that tailgate’s happiest memory is movie night at rewinds ;_; gosh

lmao I love whirl kicking down the door

OOOOH and then the time skip!!!!!!!!! I fucking love non-linear stories

jesus, swerves whole face being gone is still disturbing

magnus rlly is a grade A badass. I forgot he has missile shoulders

rodimus saying ‘wham, bam, in the van!’ is my fuckgin favorite hvbsdhhfbhdjkf that's my son right there

cd saying that rewind is allergic to ultraviolet light [eyes emoji] remember how UV light is the only way to see mnemosurgery marks? that little detail must be in there for that ‘cd did mnemosurgery on rewind’ plotline that jro didn't end up doing (thankfully)

I love how mtmte came up with a name for cybertronian marriage :) that's the kind of lore I want baybe!

also rewind and cd hhhhhh they....the og canon gays...confirmed outright in issue 12, which is so early on, considering!...its a beautiful thing. I will talk about the representation in mtmte Extensively throughout my reread since this is, yknow, Just The Beginning when it comes to canon gays - which, again, what a beautiful thing!

actually I'm not done. thinking abt the fact that this issue came out in 2012 and also this is freaking TRANSFORMERS of all things - a long-running franchise whose primary audience is adolescent boys - is extra amazing. augh, the representation! it gets me man.

ok, so, the story! jesus poor cyclonus

chromedome riding on the trex guy hbhsjkfbjshdf dude. I choose to believe that that’s his go-to tactic here bc he’s probably pretty terrible at fighting. idk how canon that is but I just see cd as the type of dude who cant fight well at all, regardless of how many fights he’s actually been in

minibot squad!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm really interested in the little we see of general cybertronian attitude towards organics - obvs the decepticons think very little of them, and the autobots generally believe all life is important, but the post-war attitude seems a little more grey and I like that

tailgate!!!!!!!!!!!! I love tailgate SO much. the way he volunteers to defuse a bomb that he has NO idea how to defuse, and the way he lies so quickly and casually? fucking love it

and then he takes all of his bomb disarming cues from rewind, who ALSO isn't a bomb disposal expert by any means - like, tailgate risks both his own life and everyone else’s, just because he wont come clean about his real job - that's some [chefs kiss] characterization right there, I love it

augh I love how he prompts rewind, who of COURSE would have some idea about this as an archivist, for help, and rewind doesn't have any idea that tailgate’s even more clueless than him

but tg, being a generally good person, still tells rewind he should proooooobably stand clear - just in case!!!!!

and then rewind whips out some marriage issues and tg is like ooookay then lol

cyclonus just stabbing people w/his hands....icon

whirl quoting the raw ass line ‘you, who are without mercy, now plead for it?’ nice

swerve. WHY would you point a gun AT YOUR OWN FACE. especially a gun made by BRAINSTORM. why did anybody let swerve handle firearms if this is how he does it. actually, why did anyone give swerve a gun after the thing w/rung. jesus yall. so not only are hipaa laws basically non-existent on cybertron, but gun safety is a rarely-taught thing as well. no wonder yall have issues

so cd must not like cyclonus bc cyclonus was the one who attacked kimia, where cd worked. right?? am I remembering tfwiki correctly? lmao

OOOOF cd saying he was born w/out innermost....I cant remember, is it canon or just extrapolation that that isn't true, and rather it was that cd gave all his innermost energon away w/his previous husbands and whatnot, but he doesn't remember since he forgot about them? either way, oof

all the functionist history stuff is so INTERESTING...I could read an entire comic about just like, pre-war when the functionists were just taking over

tg saying he hates dominus - is that that tweet from jro where somebody asked him why tg said that, and jro basically said ‘he’s petty and jealous’ lol I fucking love it. I love how a character like tailgate, who is very ‘pure’/innocent, has flaws as well

cd has a good point - its hard to kill tfs. so, that makes it extra fucking depressing that cd was seeking out death to that extent

gahhhh the whole rewind-dominus thing is so INTERESTING - I love how vague things are...we only hear about dominus from other people’s perspectives; mainly rewind who clearly thought highly of him, but he’s obviously biased, so it’s hard to tell what dominus was REALLY like, especially with the unavoidable power gap between rewind and dominus...UGH its so interesting

oof, the whole dynamic of cd thinking that rewind cares more about dominus - dominus the ghost, and finding out what happened to him in general - than chromedome himself, is just so Ouch

and the fact that cd thinks that the SOLE reason that rewind is going into battle is so he can look for dominus, but tg makes a good point - rewind is likely also worried abt cd’s safety, especially after dominus disappeared how he did - rewind is probably terrified that the same thing will happen w/cd, bc rewind cares about cd just as much as he cared/cares about dominus, but cd cant see that. AUGHHHH the Complexity!! mannnn

HHHH and like I adore that this first gay couple we get isn't perfect, and that's OKAY bc they’re not The Gay Rep, we get plenty of other gays with their own 3-dimensional relationships....augh bruh it Gets me ok

AHHHHHHHHHH THE OVERLORD STUFF. AUGHHHHHH

who was that talking to cd?? I don't remember....it must've been drift, I think? or maybe brainstorm...

whirl :’) I mean, we find out later that its kinda his fault that rewind was blown up, but still, him putting his own life at risk to save rewind...aww

cyclonus be nice to tg, he’s trying to give you his cool baja blast innermost energon

CYCLONUS BE NICE :( :( :(

we gotta have our slowburn, tho....OOOOUGH

hhhh and then cyclonus like, realizes how much of a dick he’s being and goes back to help tg.... ;_;

cyclonus my man u are lucky that tailgate is so forgiving

and then we have whirl and cyclonus, which is another relationship i LOVE. their development is just...[chefs kiss]

cyc just grabbing tg by the head and YEETING him out the door...lmao

cyclonus’s extremely detailed threat to whirl came at like, the WORST possible time lmao

alternatively, rewind unfortunately asked the worst two people for help at the worst time

also alternatively, tg defusing his first bomb ever based on instructions from another amateur was maybe not the best move

and of course whirl just deciding to lock cyclonus (and rewind whoops) in with a bomb lmao

the requisite to joining the lost light is that you have to be a complete disaster of a person, on some level

cyclonus shielding rewind ;_;

fucking love how they managed to have a cliffhanger w/the bomb going off, despite us seeing exactly what the outcome of that was earlier in this very issue. brilliant

ah, issue 12, the issue that officially canonized the gays and introduced us to a whole bunch of worldbuilding on cybertronian relationships. i love it! plus we have some fascinating backstory and some cool character stuff, and relationship development for tg and cyclonus. awesome stuff!

up next: humansona business! oh fuck yeah

#lj rereads mtmte #The Gays Begin

1 note · View note