#wrong or that I don't care ever again

[justsasuke]

There's this thought that's been festering in the back of my head growing independently like an unwanted fungus and it needs to breathe for a second so I'm sharing it.

(This is is another me thinking out loud post so please think of it as an exploration of an idea rather than a presentation.) what if, what if, what if. What if Naruto was Sasuke's first love. What if he liked him. like liked him. And when he realized it it made him frustrated. Because he's supposed to be focused on so many other things but this stupid obnoxious useless team mate of his has forced his way under his skin and won't leave him alone. And it's completely one-sided. Naruto doesn't feel the same way. yes he's obsessed with Sasuke but he really does mean friends. Naruto wants to be the greatest ninja, he wants to be Hokage and somehow he's so focused on those things that he doesn't.notice. that Sasuke is suffering. Meanwhile Sasuke is in agony because everyday it just gets worse. he cares too much. The desire for connection starts overshadowing his entire reason for existence. He's losing grip on the loneliness that was fueling his goals. And his heart is starting to ache with something completely opposite of darkness whenever he sees stupid Naruto connecting with so many people in the way only Naruto knows how. and it begins to not matter anymore if he can avenge his clan or not. All he wants is to be with Naruto in that world. He would die for Naruto. he did once. But Naruto doesn't feel the same way. And the unhealed wound in Sasuke's heart is festering too much and he's hurting in too many ways that can't disappear on their own. And then he starts realizing that Naruto doesn't understand him. That the village they were both born in isn't his home but it is Naruto's. That Naruto loves it and wants to belong to it and is actually starting to. And Sasuke realizes how far he is from this world that Naruto is living in because Naruto was born with nothing but is getting everything and he expects it to be the same for Sasuke too. He expects it to be the same for everyone. That's how it was for him. And he tells Sasuke so. And it ruins Sasuke because he realizes that if he stayed he would be ripped apart entirely by Naruto's world view, that whatever love Naruto was giving him was only burning him and suffocating him.

So he walks away. because the love Naruto can give him is not the love that will heal him or help him. It's the kind of love that will kill him.

#I don't ship Sasuke/Naruto shipper bc I like #the idea that how they cared about each other wasn't what the other wanted/needed #Like Naruto cared about Sasuke but what if it was the wrong kind of love #you know when you fall in love with someone and the love they can give you is not what you actually need #what if it was like that for them #that's what made me start thinking about this #Naruto #Sasuke #Pro Sasuke #but also poor Sasuke agonizing every night #because he feels himself falling in love but also realizes it's poisoning him #Sasuke who suffered with this unrequited love wondering if he would ever have anything like what he used to have again #thinking out loud #Idk if this even captured the nuance of what I was trying to say

[da-proti-toku-grem]

why can't anyone understand that everyone is different and not everyone likes the same things and that it's completely okay AND normal for someone not to like going out and preferring to stay at home :/

#honestly i understand that my parents care about me and they don't want me to be feeling bad #and that they ask me bc they just want to make sure i'm okay #but i've explained to them what i feel like and they just don't get and i get mad but i akso know it's not their fault and just... oughhhhh #like yeah i have a weird kind of social anxiety according to my therapist and even she doesn't know exactly how to help me yet #but there are just so many reasons behind why i don't like going out and it's not just bc it gives me anxiety #or why those situations give me anxiety in the forst place #1. i'm just a very introverted person that doesn't like going out #2. crowded places/closed spaces/places where there's not enough ventilation/loud places (be it people talking or just music) overwhelme me #3. all said in 2 + flashing lights give me huge migraines that can linger for over 3 days #4. i am very much a night owl and i'm forced to live in a society where that isn't fucking acceptable apparently and i'm called lazy for - #- not being productive in the morning when the only reason behind it is that i am a lot more productive at night #but no one ket's me do that bc 'why are you doing stuff when you're supposed to be asleep?' #i have been the same since i was little. literally nothing has changed #and people where always like 'oh she's just shy' #but idk wtf changed #maybe it was that i became and 'adult' or maybe the fact that i started therapy and they told my parents that i have social anxiety. idk #but suddenly every single person in my family is worried about it and they're genuinely making me feel like there's smth wrong about me #i mean. i have my problems i'm not gonna go telling you that i'm perfect bc i'm pretty much not #but is there really smth that wrong with me that i need to fix #or is society just a bitch that doesn't understand that there's different kinds of people and everyone is different & IT'S COMPLETELY OKAY #have they ever thought about the fact that maybe these situations cause me anxiety bc i've been forced all my life to do them #even if i don't like them #instead of thinking that i don't like them BC they cause me anxiety?? #i mean. i know i have to go out more and that there's tons of things i can do ofc #but you can't just force me to do things i don't want to and put on a good face while doing it *every.fucking.day* #aaaaand i could add a lot more things but i'm once again reaching the tag limit so i shoukd just shut up #it's just driving me crazy bc i know they're trying to help but it really is not helping at all............. #ranting

[eddis-not-eeddis]

Dealing with newcomer's embarrassment gets easier if you are surrounded by people you have no respect for.

#oh this other professional saw me do something stupid that messed up my paperwork? #but she does shady things worse than the mistake i just made on purpose to make a buck #oh i just said something dumb to my boss #give him a few hours and he'll say something even dumber to me #oh no the guy who has been working at this job for twenty years just saw me make a rookie mistake #agony abounds but he just did six other things a lot worse than I did all in one day so i'll live with it #oh no the manager is a little disappointed with my performance? #so what he's a pushover and he won't say or do anything about it anyway i'll do better next time #oh no my one coworker hates my guts #she hate's everyone else's guts too and literally never shuts up about it #i'm not special #it sounds kind of depressing--and it can be #but i have a lot of affection for these people regardless of their issues #i just don't really let my failures around them bother me too much anymore because i honestly don't care what these people think of me #i'm not going to make the same mistakes ever again #but i don't have to let this stuff keep me up at night because i did something wrong #if i'm not going to go to them for advice why do i care what they think about me? #it was something that i realized a few months ago and ever since it's made things a LOT easier to deal with #plus #these people aren't dwelling on my failures either #they all have their own stuff going on #yeah they might harp on it for a while bit new things will come up and eventually they forget #they aren't thinking about me that much anyway #XD

[navree]

Let's be honest, and I say this with full offense, Lucerys Velaryon is the Archduke Franz Ferdinand of the Dance of the Dragons. He is meant to be a sacrificial lamb to kick off the entire war proper. If we had gotten a full season of development with him like we did with the younger cast in Game of Thrones, I guarantee more people would've felt something. The only reason I personally feel bad is from a baseline level of empathy, because he was a child who was placed in an unwinnable situation due to his mom being completely irresponsible with him and his brothers.

However…

The comparison between Lucerys and Aemond is no contest. Love him or hate him, Aemond has an actual personality and goals when we first meet him. There's enough dimension in Aemond as a child to showcase the potential for sympathy between him and Jace at the funeral, a scene they didn't need to put in, but they did, which emphasizes his own innocence. Even before he breaks bad fully in S1E10, he's still far more compelling to watch due to the number of scenes allocated to him and his dynamic with other people.

This is where you and I are going to disagree just a bit, because Lucerys does do something in S1E07 and S1E08. He gouges out the eye of a family member and petulantly whines that he “didn’t do anything!” when confronted with the possibility of getting in trouble for it, then years later has the nerve and complete lack of sense to giggle at the person he permanently maimed only hours after his legitimacy was publicly called into question (again) and resulted in a murder. The narrative (perhaps unintentionally) glosses over these moments in favor of portraying him as good, whereas if you read between the lines, you can see that as being an oversimplification. The problem is that because S1 was truncated, secondary characters like Lucerys don’t receive screentime dedicated to portraying anything other than a single personality trait. Unfortunately, because of his role in the text and the way it was adapted for television, there was never a chance that Lucerys would be interesting.

I don't even have anything to add, this is just objectively correct.

#personal #answered #anonymous #and yeah lucerys refusing to take any responsibility or even show a hint of remorse for what he did is so galling to me #i could never care about him after that #like first of all you were in the wrong in the fight period #aemond did nothing wrong he claimed a free dragon who let him bond with her #i get why rhaena and baela were acting irrationally upset their mother died and they're young #grief makes you act weird #jace and luke had absolutely no reason to act the way they did #like it's not your fight and also again aemond literally did nothing wrong #but because he made a nasty comment after already being yelled at for doing nothing wrong y'all decide to gang up on him #with your cousins #and then this little idiot decides to take a whole knife to someone's face and refuses to ever feel bad #luke could have KILLED aemond #aemond could have DIED #not just from the immediate wound but also any issues that arose during a really long and arduous healing process #it's why fics with luke where he feels bad or contrite don't work for me #because he literally doesn't??? #he doesn't care at all #he doesn't care he almost killed a person for no reason and left them with lifelong issues as a result of his fuck up #out here kicking his feet and giggling over maiming another human being #again vhagar eating him was too easy #he should have gotten his eye poked out first anyway #literally only feel kinda bad for rhaenyra cuz i'm neutral leaning positive towards rhaenyra and losing a child hurts #luke himself can rot i feel nothing

[chl3borzoi]

You should never feel dread about intimacy. It should be a pain-free and enjoyable thing. You should feel held by your partner. Your partner should defend you to others and make you feel wanted, in many more ways than just sexually. If this clicks with you, i encourage you to leave. Heartbreak and being alone is sad, but it's better than bad.

#i feel like too many people taking dating way too seriously. #if things are bad and youre not comfortable or happy #and if you do indeed try to voice yourself and address things. to not be heard or understood. or respected. LEAVE leave leave #leeeavvvveeeeee regain confidence recognize your charming character qualities take care of yourself. #you should never ever ever put up with feeling scared in the bedroom #because apologies cannot fix that level of trust breaking #p #yeah i slept through therapy yeahh im binge drinking again lmfaooo. love yourself because i don't love myself. #OH a liar is something we don't entertain. #if youre partner is a liar ESPECIALLY a pathological one RUNNNN AWAY #wrong your oh look i picked up a bad habit lmfao. god. have enough self love and worth to date someone whos fucking literate. #feeling [REDACTED] Today may record vocals for my friends album later

[crow-caller]

Sorry if this is weirdly specific, but I was wondering why you don't like Ursula K Le Guin, since I saw you expressing that in the tags of a post. I've started reading some of her books and they seem so enlightening -- they touch upon issues like societal unrest, class, gender, etc in ways that are still relevant decades after the books were published. I hope I haven't ignored anything problematic she did, if at all. For all I know this could just be your preference and that's fine. I'm just worried that my seeing her as inspiring is actually a bad thing.

I get a lot of Qs on this (or at least, like three) and it makes me mildly regret my hardline status on Guin. Mostly because I don't have one. I hear many great things about Le Guin! I see great quotes from her and I understand her as someone who is extremely iconic and influential in inventive sci fi and fiction. Good for her!

My problem with her is a little one, I guess- it seems like it doesn't reflect her other books at all. I think she just wrote one bad one, the only one I read, and that's Word for World is Forest. I Hate this book, and it coloured my thoughts on Le Guin until I learned she was very respectable and loved. She especially indeed seemed on the forefront of writing class, race, gender, etc!

Word for World is Forest though I think is still... bad. I stand by that. We can't all always write good books ma'am.

Forest is about human colonizers on a forest world oppressing the ape-like alien natives, who are coded as native Americans, and how are peaceful and have no concept of war. The evil colonists colonize, the poor ape natives are sad :(( until they learn about violence :)) they were such Noble Savages they had no such thing but now they do!! Which is good but also bad :((

Basically, I hate the noble savage trope and it just is that.

#sometimes theres asks #it's been many years since I read it! maybe I read it wrong #but I don't care to bother with it again. I'd read something else by her if I ever had the time #ursula k le guin

[britneyshakespeare]

He won't leave my fucking friends alone.

#tales from diana #sorry this is about that bad friend i have to break up w that ive posted abt on and off the past couple weeks/months maybe #i still have to send him that final 'i dont wanna speak to you ever again' #ive been fucking busy ok. my summer has been full of family events and obligations #i have one brother getting married and the other having a baby!!! i have a LIFE and SHIT TO DO and PPL TO BE THERE FOR other than YOU!!! #i havent spoken to him in over 2 months too and he knows it's bc i don't want to #he's so difficult bc you can't fucking tell him the truth. you can't!!! he can't handle it!!! do you know how hard it is to handle??? #the things i have to do to cut him off. because he doesn't respect normal fucking boundaries. make ME feel like im in the wrong #like im the shady person and the liar. #i can't drift from him bc hell pull me back #i can't communicate w him bc he won't hear anything i have to say he'll just turn it around & make it abt himself. #he literally does not understand ppl having motivations to do things that don't relate to him #and he has no sympathy for what he does to other ppl. nothing but self-pity for how they don't like him anymore. #if he dealt w someone who put him through half of what he put ME through. no he couldn't actually. #i only allowed him to manipulate me for so long because i cared abt him. who i thought he was. #and he just point blank period doesn't care about other ppl. so he could never go through what ive gone through w him. #i feel like all this friend breakup has proven to me is that im actually a good person and it can be used against me by ppl who arent #some fucking lesson i needed to learn huh? #i hate feeling as negatively towards anyone as i do towards him. it's so hard for me not to have at least #a little spark of hope deep down for everyone. even ppl ive removed from my life before. i dont HATE them #theyve disappointed me or insulted me or mistreated me but at least their motivations seemed simple and clear #and MOST of them seemed to understand SOMEWHAT that they were in the wrong #even if they don't admit it to me or still find an excuse to hate me. whatever #i can see them as ppl who might feel remorse someday and grow from it #i do not see it in this guy. bc if you have a problem w him he'll only make it 20 times worse. #he's so selfish it genuinely baffles me to think about it. and he's one of the least honest ppl ive ever known. #he'll never see the error of his ways. i do not believe he has that capacity. #and will i say none of this to him? no #im just going to say thanks for leaving me alone these past couple months. it's been good for me. #i don't think i can continue our friendship anymore for my own sake.

[thehallstara]

i just. don't think dehumanizing people no matter who they are or what they've done is the answer ever. i just. can't get my mind around that. being monstrous is as human as anything else and when we dissociate ourselves from that we run the risk of believing we can never be monstrous either

#s.txt #monstrous probably isn't the best word here but yall get what i'm saying here #i've just. been seeing a lot of stuff that deeply concerns me from ppl i care about and idk maybe i'm the one in the wrong here #but i just can't wrap my mind around it!!!! #i know what it's like to be stripped of my humanity bc of who i am #most days i feel like i'm seconds away from it happening again #and it's a lot easier to justify harming people when you don't seem them as human and just. idk man #this has been spinning around in my head for like weeks if not months #and there is a through line here between this and a lot of feelings and thoughts i have abt the antisemitism i see constantly #and the islamaphobia that goes along with it too tbh #and this is now just an absolute word salad of tags 🙈 #but yeah tl;dr i just don't think reducing people to not human can ever be the answer for anything. yeah.

[steakout-05]

eeuuaghh i would like everyone to know that i apologise if i have not responded to your reblogs/mentions/posts on tumblr, i have really terrible social anxiety and for some reason people talking to me makes my nervous system think i'm being hunted for sport by a resident evil boss. sorry if i havent responded i'm not being rude i'm just having a panic attack :P

additionally: social anxiety is actually the reason why a lot of my old posts from late 2022 had weird spacing and spelling mistakes. i was too anxious to type properly

#sorry this seems like a random thing to post but it has been bugging me for a little bit now and i want to post it #and by a little bit i mean the entire time i've been on this website #as for the reason i have social anxiety: i went to a really terrible high school full of dangerous people- #-who were literally like. the worst most bigoted people ever. not everyone there was bad of course but 90% of them were- #-and that stunted by social development by 5-6 years and now every time someone talks to me i feel like i'm about to get murdered #also primary school was. bad. the other kids could sniff out the autism in me and didn't like me for it #this post isn't directed towards anyone specifically but also it kinda is because there's a DM from someone- #-that i haven't responded to in literally 8 months and every time i think about it i get anxious #i'm sorry!!! i'm not trying to ignore you on purpose and i want to say something but my brain literally will not let me out of fear :( #i'm not used to getting talked to directly so every time i do my entire nervous system starts screaming and running in circles #it's kinda ridiculous because it's like. come on. why are you having a panic attack over a message on tumblr it's LITERALLY just words on- #-a screen what are you freaking out about. but also it's like hhhhh unfamiliar social situation scary. help. #unrelated to that but i am very worried about what people will think of me and like i know i really shouldn't worry about that- #-because i can't control what other people think of me and it really shouldn't be any of my or their business. but also- #-i have legitimate trauma that backs my fears up and every time someone is even slightly critical towards me my brain just goes- #-''see? it happened again i TOLD you it would happen again. idiot. you shouldn't have said anything'' #and then i hide and cry and lay in bed thinking about how i'm going to die until i suddenly snap out of it and think- #-''wait hang on why should i care. i love being a weirdo on the internet why should i let my anxieties stop me'' #and then it happens AGAIN and it's just a viscous cycle at that point #be silly on the internet -> detect slight criticism -> think everyone hates you again -> go back on your bullshit after 3 days of crying #and it makes sense because that exact same pattern happened to me countless times as a child. #be silly in school -> get made fun of for it -> get hated for it -> rinse and repeat until you think everyone is dangerous and they hate yo #if i could put it in a metaphor it would be like me being a little rabbit who thinks everyone is a scary wolf because of their big shadows- #-even though they're all also rabbits and i'm just paying attention to the scariest parts of them because i only know what wolves look like #trauma does fucked up things to your psyche lemmie tell you #social anxiety #anxiety disorder #i'm literally the ''too scared to order food'' stereotype except it's not a stereotype because it's real and every time i look at the 7/11- #-at my campus i go ''hm but what if they hate me for the food i buy there'' even though they're LITERALLY SELLING IT what is WRONG with me #anyway um. social anxiety sucks and i don't mean to not reply ro everyone who talks to me i am sorr y

[king-of-havoc]

I wish life was as simple as googling "is X normal?" and then it tells you yes or no and elaborates on what to do if the answer is no

#king posts #like ''no but it's fine'' or ''no get fucking help immediately'' #I've been having such a fixation on normalcy recently (if you couldn't fucking tell) #and it's doing number on my mental health (again... if you couldn't tell) #like I don't CARE about being normal #I never really have #but I just want to KNOW if it's normal or not #I want to know if I am being abnormal or not #I don't want to be living like it's normal if it isn't #I want to know what's wrong with me #I want a name for it #I want to know exactly is wrong so I don't have to keep worrying about it #so I can be like ''yeah I'm weird because if X'' #instead of just ''I'm weird and I don't know why'' #I Do Not Like That™ #I need ✨therapy✨ #but I'll never get it -w- #because in order to do that I'd need to tell people in my real life what's wrong #and I would rather die than do that :) #it's a miracle I ever came out as trans tbh

[running-in-the-dark]

well I can already tell this is gonna be a bad night

today has just been fucking weird and hard. I'm in a bad mood. everything feels bad. (probably not helped by me not taking the new antidepressant last night so I wouldn't sleep all day)

the plan was for my friend to come over this weekend to help me pack. she did that last time and it helped a lot. (my husband could help, obviously, but he's in charge of other things that also need to get done. plus he's very bad at putting things into boxes.)

but the rail strike is still going on so it's likely that she won't be able to get here (or get back in time). so now that's suddenly a lot more stressful and the one thing that I thought would make it go okay is gone.

and I also have to like. at least reread my thesis a few times or whatever to study for the oral exam on Friday. which will make me want to die. because it is bad. so. that will be bad. and the thought of being asked questions about that piece of garbage for 30 fucking minutes is so horrifying that I genuinely do not know if I will be able to get through it without taking my Lorazepam beforehand (which I know is a horrible idea, and my psychiatrist told me twice that it's a bad idea, and I know it would just make me unbelievably stupid. but holy shit that is the scariest thing I can imagine.)

and of course instead of doing anything useful I'm now just sitting here feeling like shit (like last night, only worse)

#it'd just be so fucking nice if I could just.. have a break #it's just been nonstop awful shit since my dad's cancer diagnosis in 🤔 2015. I'm sorry but that's too long. I can't do it anymore. I just #need some damn time to fucking calm down #like yeah any outsider would probably look at my life and think 'well you haven't actually DONE anything in like 6 years' #yeah that's true #but I've also been sick and/or in pain pretty much since 2018. and some of that was fixed last year when I had my gallbladder removed but i #is still not good. first of all that did not work out so well for me. but also everything else is still not right and no one cares and I #just don't have the energy to fight to get a diagnosis #I'm just so tired #I really thought I'd just. go to uni. get my degree in 3 years like expected. get a job. move out. have a normal life FINALLY for the first #time ever #and NONE of that fucking happened #EVERYTHING WENT WRONG. again and again and again #and I am just. so. tired. I can't. I can't do it. #it feels so fucking pathetic to be like 'my life is soooo hard everyone feel bad for me' when there is just. objectively not that much wron #but it just. never. stops. #I've never had a fucking moment to just. sit down. and think. and make decisions about my life. everything just. happens to me #I just. feel so lost and stuck and doomed and it won't fucking get better! it won't! my life got better ONE TIME and it has been pure hell #since then #like. no. it won't get better. this will keep happening over and over and over #I'll never have a choice. not really. I fucked up my life permanently when I dropped out of school at 18 and tbh I wish I would've just bee #brave enough to do what I really wanted then (killing myself) #because fuck. this is not worth it #literally everyone I love is either really fucking far away or just. fictional. #I have no close relationships with anyone irl #everyone I know irl is mean and kind of an asshole. and I'm too useless to meet new people. #I just. I don't want to survive anymore I want to live but I can't have that so. what's the goddamn point #its gonna be fine. because I'm a fucking coward so I'll never do it anyway. but I fucking wish I could

[swinging-through-the-stars]

Majima is unusually depressed so Kiryu takes him to a theme park to cheer him up.

[Image Description]:

Majima: *with a little raincloud over his head* You can punch me if ya want, Kiryu-chan, but I'm not really feeling up to fightin' back today.

Kiryu looks concerned. So in the next panel he's taken him to Six Flags. Kiryu is sitting on a bench chilling in sunglasses, waist pack over his shoulder, holding a corn dog. Majima leans an elbow against him grinning with one of those dumb squid hats on and holding a massive bun-chan.

Majima: *in the last panel raising a hammer from a strongman game toward a littering tourist* Hey pal! Don't ya know someone's gonna hafta clean that up?! How 'bout I test my strength on you instead?!

Kiryu: *on the bench, eating his corndog with bun-chan* Nature is healing.

#yakuza #ryu ga gotoku #kazuma kiryu #goro majima #theme park #my friend and i were talking about depressed majima #and how honestly that is the worst thing ever #that even kiryu couldn't stand that #he'd definitely like take him somewhere to make him happy again #cause if majima doesn't feel like fighting then something's wrong #you gotta take care of your rival #if you don't take your rival on a date every once in a while he'll get sad

[unusualshrimp]

.

#i know this is wrong of me #but i get so annoyed when someone can't name their top 5/10 movies #and then they just give the ''ohhh im soo indecisive and theres so many good movies out there'' excuse #like. 😑 im not asking for ur thesis on every movie ever made #literally just asking you to name the first ones off the top of your head???? #do you guys know that you can just name some movies you like. i promise you won't explode and no one will come to arrest you #just think of some random movies you watched and didn't hate! just name those!!! who cares! what's all the drama for #if you don't want to tell me what movies you like that's fine. but just day that. dont go ''Oooh i can't make decisions'' #WHERE is the decision. have you ever watched a movie you liked or not. Yes? name them. No? well just say that! 😭 #i dont care if it's Accurate! this isn't some legal contract or i'll sue you for changing your mind later! what is the issue !!!!!!! #again im never gonna be mean to people who do this or even say anything to them but i just find it really frustrating #im not asking you for a kidney. just name some movies. no one will die i promise

[girlscience]

okay okay okay okay. I KNEW that the fight between Luffy and Usopp was going to be different from the rest of the show so far and I knew I was going to have thoughts about it but oh my god I did not expect it to FEEL so different. Like up to this point they have faced some fucked up people and had some serious fights, but the Strawhats themselves haven't really felt serious. This alone feels like it legitimized Luffy's captaincy and proved how the crew will trust and follow his decision making. (which is why I really really love Zoro's part in it because even Luffy was having a hard time doing this and Zoro told him he couldn't waver because if he did who could they trust? and I have so many feelings about that) Anyway, this was really the first incident related only to the crew themselves that has felt actually serious and I really appreciated that.

#I also liked seeing all the other responses to the fight as well #Nami clearly doesn't understand and just wants them to apologize and get along again but she's still siding with Luffy because he is captain #Sanji understands more but he also clearly would prefer for them to just talk it out but I feel like he does think Usopp is in the wrong #in a way that Nami doesn't and he is still following Luffy #and then Chopper... I don't feel like he fully understands but I think his issue stems more from a crisis as a doctor #and feeling it is his role to heal everyone and suddenly he is unable to care for someone he loves #However I do think that in part his experience with almost being taken by the foxy pirates really cemented him as never ever leaving #the strawhats so even though it hurts him he isn't going to do anything that he feels betrays the crew and i feel like he found a good line #of respecting his beliefs as a doctor and also still following luffy #I think Zoro saw this as necessary and knew Luffy needed something that cemented him as captain and he knew there was no other way #for luffy and usopp to work out their disagreement. also he has only been following luffy this whole time and he feels the rest of the crew #needs the level of devotion he has to luffy so if usopp doesn't feel that and wants to leave? he says go. #if you aren't willing to follow no matter what you shouldn't be here. also i think he is mad at usopp for making the rest of the crew have #to go through all this and watch it happen. #i am very excited to see all the fallout from this and how this arc goes and how they get back together #i am also super super excited for the robin plotline #i know farrrrr more about the usopp plot in this arc than robins so i literally don't know what's going on with her right now #and i'm super excited to find out #one piece

[naamahdarling]

.

#controversial take but families should not have more influence over mental health policy than the actual patients #yet again i see another initiative pushed by loved ones that will make things less safe for patients #sorry bad shit happened to your loved one but you can't call for worse treatment of psych patients and call it right #the only people who should have a voice in this are actual patients #not doctors not families not legislators nobody but patients #everyone else get out because it isn't your well-being at risk #so much seems to be about preventing families from suffering #so thay nobody will have to go through what they did #that's...not how you help patients #you can only help patients only by listening to patients #anything pushed by other parties that does good does it mostly by accident #because they sure aren't looking at what WE go through and what we say is best for US #wards are prisons and prisons are inherently violent and surveillance meant to increase interventions that funnel patients into wards #is a form of violence and abuse #abolishing prisons means abolishing psych wards as well so make a note of that #and don't EVER support ANY measure that increases ANY scrutiny of patients because it puts patients in danger of wrongful incarceration #based on the whim of what may be one trainee therapist a school counselor or Christ help you a fucking COP #increasing access to mental health care should not ever involve a mechanism making it easier to send patients inpatient for their own good #starting to think the whole thing isn't worth keeping as it is #doctors and psychs are primarily gatekeepers and cops anymore and it's ridiculous that I should have to walk on eggshells #to access second-rate care #the lunatics SHOULD be running the asylum because they're the only people a fellow lunatic can trust #takes that will get you burned at the stake

[barnbridges]

i think being autistic is like. i dont even have an attachment style. i dont even have attachments bro.

#um something under-represented is that #in my experience (and very theorized by actual physicians) most autistic people have an inferiority complex #that is innane simply to how. we are treated in this world #and how often we face rejection or being misunderstood or being generally different #and this severs greatly our ability to connect to people and how we form relationships #because you always um think there's innerly something wrong with you (and there is) and #i cannot i think define my attachments because i have such insane trust issues #i dont think anyone really cares about me or wants to be my friend or be close to me #i don't know how people think of themselves as my friends #because im such a lingering malignant figure #youre like but isnt this inner no bitch #usually i think my parents also hate me and everyone in my family hates me #i am very prone to um #my mother just pointed out that i seem sadder than usual and im like how do you KNOW #my rational brain knows my mother (as narcissistic and awful as she can be) loves me and has proven it to me time and time again #but my irrational brain is like she cannot possibly ever love me why would she love me #its um. i think literally all of us have this insecurity and instability thats just inherent #idk #which is also why i lose friends i think