#without letting her know that I feel like my life is empty without him and all that because I’m crazier than she knows
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4Me 4Me - Matt sturniolo
♱✮♱⋆ ⋆♱✮♱⋆ ⋆♱✮♱⋆ ⋆♱✮♱⋆ ⋆♱✮♱⋆ ⋆♱✮♱⋆ ⋆♱✮♱
♱✮♱⋆ ⋆♱✮♱⋆ ⋆♱✮♱⋆ ⋆♱✮♱⋆ ⋆♱✮♱⋆ ⋆♱✮♱⋆ ⋆♱✮♱
Summary: completely ghosting your ex boyfriend definitely helped you get over him…right ??
Warnings: 18+ MINORS DNI !!!, use of alcohol, weed, and nicotine, language, tiny bit of smut, switch!matt x Switch!reader, uses of pet names (baby, honey, sweetheart, pretty girl), not proof read, lmk if I missed anything
Word count: 5.8k
You and Matt dated for a year and ended up on bad terms due to your jealous toxic behavior and Matt’s possessiveness. For the first 2 months of the break up yall stayed in contact and still acted like a couple until you got a fucking grip and completely ghosted him on the 3rd month. You started going out a lot more and making new friends even flirted with a couple guys but nothing was truly helping that bit of emptiness that you still felt without Matt.
It’s now been 10 months since you and Matt broke up and 8 months since you’ve completely cut contact. You stopped going out as much you really just focusing on yourself and fixing your bad behaviors making yourself a bit cold and distant with everyone in your life, your friend even calling you “heartless” at one point. And maybe also you know tattoo therapy….
·:*¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨*:·
Tara invited me to her party that’s tonight and of course I said yes, it’s been a while since I’ve seen her or even went to a party period.
Its was currently 8pm and I’m contemplating going now that I’ve been staring at myself in the mirror or a bit to long
“Yeah no I can’t wear a dress”
Everything about it was just unflattering and too feminine I change into some baggy dark wash jeans with one of those black rave star halter tops that literally only covers your boobs and the rest of it is straight up string
I accessories with a black BEBE belt , black and white tie dye beanie, studded cuff bracelets, and to finish off the look some black and white DC shoes. I also make sure to lift my thong a tad bit so you could see it poking out of my waistband
“Okay now I feel better”
I definitely started dressing less fem and more masc over these couple months but honestly it’s a nice change I personally think it’s made my style better
I check the time it’s 8:30pm and my Uber should be here in 5 minutes. I grab my phone, my vape, my penjamin, and my house keys. Lock the door and happily go outside and get in my Uber
·:*¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨*:·
Pulling up to Tara’s party you got a bit of a qweezie feeling in your stomach but just brush it off texting Tara letting her know your here and step out of the car thanking the Uber then head inside.
It was loud and surprisingly dark you try to look around and see if you recognized anyone…..JAKE ! It was always easy to spot him due to his height. You head in the direction of Jake but also looking around to see if you know anyone else, you see Tana in the distance with her bf, Johnnie awkwardly standing next to Sam while he talks to Colby. It was nice to see your friends again you couldn’t lie you missed being out like this.
You finally get to Jake lightly tugging on his jacket for him to notice you, Jake looks down in confusion but breaks into a smile once he sees you
“Y/NNNNN nice to see that you escaped prison” he chuckles and embraces you into a hug
“Please don’t make me seem like a criminal Infront of people that don’t know me” chuckles “but thank you I really have Tara to thank though, speaking of her where is she ?”
“I actually do not know but maybe the bar knowing her”
Chuckles “yeah you’re right”
You turn in the direction of the bar and sure enough you see her tiny self
“God damn y/n how many tattoos did you get within these past couple months, your more covered than me”
You look around confused for a second then realized you never posted about your tattoos when you got them
“Oh shit right dude honestly um I thinkkkk twenty, cause I have 28 in total right now and when we meet I only had 8”
“Your crazy”
“Says you you also have a fuck ton of tattoos”
“Yeah but mine are small patch work you’res is like HUGE”
“If you think any of these are huge then you should see my most recent tattoo it goes down my whole leg”
“Your actually insane now go see Tara cause she has something for you”
He lightly pushes the small of your back in the direction of the bar which you moved heading to where Tara is your anxiety spiking for some reason you take a hit of your vape and continue
Tara sees you coming her way and started squealing in excitement and runs to hug you and you hug her back of course
“Ughhh you don’t know how much I’ve missed you you really went all ghost on everyone for so long” she looks you up and down “like look at these tattoos most of these weren’t here a while go” she chuckles “you look so hot though maybeeee might get a guys number you neverrrr know”
You laugh at her teasing blushing a little bit
“Nono I’m really not here for that I just want to have a good time you know that”
“Hehe okay we’ll take a shot with me pleaseeee”
“Just one”
“Three”
“Two”
“Fine two”
“Give me a chaser bro I am not taking these straight”
Tara laughs handing you her Diet Coke “Go first”
I throw back both of the shots then chug down the coke
“Uhhh fuck I hate alcohol so much”
You Take a hit of your vape and pen
“Smoking is also bad for you, you know”
“Yes but I much rather kill my lungs then my liver thank you very much, also Jake said you have something for me what is it”
“Oh yeah um it’s not a gift or anything but more like someone gave me this to give back to you, open your hand”
You give Tara your hand while she places something in it
“Promise me not to get upset”
“I can’t promise anything Tara but I won’t make a big deal out of it”
“Okay”
·:*¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨*:·
She moves her hand, it’s a ring and bracelet…. Matt’s ring and bracelet that I gave him when we first started dating.
“Well that sucks it’s the one thing I wasn’t expecting coming from him, give it back to him they’re his not mine”
“Give it to him yourself y/n it’s been 8 months”
“Yeah I guess right…”
Tara smiles a little
“Okay well let’s not worry about that now let’s have fun”
·:*¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨*:·
Nick pov
“MATT YOURE COMING INSIDE”
“NO IM NOT I BROUGHT YOU AND CHRIS HERE NOW GET OUT”
“I’m tired of your depressed self you never have fun, ever since y/n broke up with you, you’ve been MISERABLE and I’m tired of it, it’s been 8 months officially, tighten the fuck up and get over it”
“Matt you even got ready JUST GO IN you act like we’re gonna see y/n, I tell you all the time that women has CHANGED for the better at that. she doesn’t go out anymore she’s a homebody and on her work grind dude”
“I don’t understand why you still talk to her”
“She didn’t want too for the longest but I made her stay my friend cause I didn’t wanna lose a good friend cause of my brothers possessives and his own problem’s”
“She also had things wrong with her”
“NO SHIT MATTTTTTT SHES THE ONE WHO NOTICED THAT AND DECIDED TO END IT”
“Matt come on dude you’ll be with us the whole time”
“I do not wanna go”
“You are not about to miss ANOTHER Tara yummy party now get your ass out of the car, NICK GRAB HIM”
I hop out of car and open the driver door and pull Matt out the car while Chris pushes him out, Matt is extremely pissed off
“OKAY JUST GET THE FUCK OFF ME”He straightens himself out
“Okay we can go inside yall are so annoying”
“Wait Matt where is your ring and bracelet?”
“I guess I just forgot them”
“You fucking idiot”
I could tell he was lying it’s not hard to tell he always wears them and he was fidgeting with his hands way to much
My phone vibrated in my pocket it was from y/n
“Nick are you at Tara’s party ?”
“About to go in why !?”
“Im coming outside”
“WAIT YOURE HERE ?!?!?”
“Um yeah Tara invited me??”
“Stay inside”
“Now why the fuck would you tell me to stay inside?”
I look up from my phone to see y/n coming towards us with a confused look on her face
“Oh fuck”
My eyes dart to the side looking at matt for the second, she turns her head to look at him then tilts her head
“Oh That’s why, well I came to give you Matts bracelet and ring back but since he’s here”
She walks to him and places Matt’s bracelet and ring in his hand
“Next time don’t send someone else to do your dirty work Matthew I know you’re not weak like that”
“Y/n I-“
“You don’t have to explain yourself Matt I don’t need to know, it was good see you three, I’ll be going inside now if you’ll excuse me”
We watched as y/n walked back inside
“Now if I must say y/n has only gotten more attractive, holy fuck even the way she composed herself”
“Chris shut the fuck up” I start “well is that what you wanted Matt”
“Her tattoos…holy fuck”
“Oh my god your not even paying attention”
“I am I am but what the hell why did she only get more attractive and I’ve gotten less”
“Your not ugly your a very handsome boy”
“Yes a very attractive young man”
“Okay yeah but COMPARED TO THAT no dude I just fumbled”
“I mean not really yall where toxic asf nearing the end of it”
“Yeah but she’s changed”
“And you haven’t soooo let’s move on with this conversation and get THE FUCK inside please and thank you”
·:*¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨*:·
Y/n pov
I run back inside to find tara and grab her by the arm
“Matt is here I ran into him by accident”
“Girl huh how?”
“Nick told me he was outside so I went to give him Matt’s stuff but he was literally right there I just gave Matt his stuff of course but I spoke to him but I feel like I was super harsh with it”
“Girl breathe… talk to him literally what is the harm it’s been 8 months I’m sure he would understand also it’s not like you like him still”
Bats eyelashes blank stare
“Oh you’ve gotta be kidding me y/n”
“IM JOKING IM JOKING but I do wanna apologize to him for everything cause it was mostly my fault”
“Okay but wasn’t he like overly possessive”
“Yeah… but I always pushed his boundaries with that shit and was always insecure and made him not have any privacy like I definitely need to apologize to him more than he does to me”
“Instead of telling me that why don’t you just go”
“Heeehhh let me go hotbox the restroom and enjoy my first thennnn I’ll go talk to him later in the night”
“Might as well get another shot in while you’re at it”
“Ugh fineeee just because I know your gonna bother me about it anyways”
·:*¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨*:·
Its 10:35pm now your a bit more drunk then you would like and you where also a tad bit high as well.
You feel all sweaty and crammed now kinda wanting to go home now but you still wanna talk to Matt so you go to find him. you stumble apon chris first though he was sitting and talking to colby and his girlfriend Malia
“Hmm chris have you seen matt?”
“I havent actually why”
“I wanna talk to him”
“y/n youre drunk”
“Yes i know chris im not gonna do anything stupid trust”
“Hmm dont know if i should”
“He going into the bathroom right now” colby spoke up
“Hehe thank you colby also Malia you look absolutely gorgeous”
“Thank you y/n” she giggles
“Hmm of course”
You very joyfully head to where that bathrooms are and stand there and wait for matt to come out, getting more nervous you hit your pen
“You waiting for someone beautiful”
You look up and meet eyes with a guy youve never meet before, you look at him confused
“Random flattery wont work on me”“Awe come on you wouldnt dress that way for no reason”
“What are you implying exactly huh”
“You know what i mean look at you” he goes to grab your waist and you back up
“Hm okay well imma give you two options now. 1. Leave and dont bother me again, or 2. Continue to harass me and i make a scene”
“Awe come on a pretty girl like you shouldn’t be threatening no one” he went to brush your hair behind your ear but you slap his hand away
“Try some stupid shit again dawg”
“Awe what you think you all tuff i bet i could bend you over right here and fuck that attude out of you”
You spit in his face “lmao the fuck you think you are”
“YOU BITCH” he pushes you hard against the wall winding you
Just in the blink on an eye you see matt grab the dude by his collar his slam him against the wall “watch your fucking mouth and if see you put your hands on any women again ill wont just slam you against a wall next time, patchetic excuse of a man” matt lets go of the guy looking over at you worried then comes over too you
“Are you okay ?”
“Yeah i didnt feel it tbh im a little to drunk”
“Um can i jus-”
“Wait no dont say anything can we talk outside i really need to talk to you”
“Um yeah lets go to the van”
·:*¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨*:·
You both head outside and get in the van at first it’s just silence between yall until Matt clears his throat so you speak up
“it’s been a while since I’ve sat up here”
“Yeah it’s one think Chris doesn’t have to worry about anymore”
“He must of loved when I stopped coming around huh”
“Only for the part he didn’t have to fight anyone for front seat, he misses messing with you he really sees you as a older sister y/n”
You didn’t even hear him you were too much in your head which lead to word vomit
“I’m sorry for everything, I was a pretty shitty girlfriend I never had trust for you even though you gave me no reason to feel like that I had a lot of mental health issues going on and I pushed everything onto you and it just became more and more toxic cause my jealously and insecurity’s only grew… I truly am sorry for everything”
There was a moment of pure silence which scared you a bit until Matt let out a light chuckle
“I see that you’ve gotten way better at talking about your feelings”
“Yeah it’s called get on anti depressants and getting help”
“Oh shit sorry..”
“Nono oh my god I was joking about the anti depressants, I am on ADHD medications now though” you laugh and how easily he believed you
“You’re an idiot”
“Youre a bigger one”
“Shut up”
“Hey, don’t catch an attitude with me Mister” you grab him by the chin making him look at you then let go
“Okay I’m sorry I take it back, but I do wanna say I still can’t apologize to you about how possessive I was cause well it hasn’t changed, I thought it was cause well I haven’t had any interest in anybody but no… seeing you again especially with other guys it gave the same feeling in the stomach that it did back then as well”
“Matt can I ask you something”
“Yeah of course ?”
“When we were together what was i for you”
He looks at you confused but then just sighs
“Everything. You made everything just feel so perfect nothing was bothersome anymore all my thoughts would leave my head I was just happy… anytime I was away from you all I was waiting for was you to text or call me once you weren’t busy anymore or asleep, everything revolved around you because I wanted it too, you felt like my true safe place… and when you ghosted me it honestly ruined me.
“Matt…”
“I thought it was some kinda sick joke at first but even Nick and Chris couldn’t get through to you.. it felt like my whole world crumbled down. After the first week I got a little better since Nick forced you not to break contact with him and Chris just because of me, I’m pretty sure neither of them told you this but sometime when you would call them they would have the phone on speaker just so I could hear your voice…it was the least they could do they said cause they felt bad”
“I’m sorry Matt I didn’t know it affected you so much…but I do remember on the 4th month of having no contact with you Nick called me at like 3am asking me if I could just get back with you could shut up but I didn’t know what he ment at the time”
He looked confused for a second but then it clicked
“I woke him up one night cause I couldn’t sleep and just complained about how much I missed you”
“You know I unblocked your number on the 4th month right?”
“Huh no what ?!?”
“Yeah I unblocked your number a while ago totally not to see if you would call me or something…but since you didn’t I just assumed you were over it at that point, it lifted a weight off my shoulders but now knowing that wasn’t the case, I’m sorry”
“Hm don’t apologize you didn’t know”
“I still feel bad” you pout
“Wipe that pout off your face you look ridiculous”
“Ugh you’re still so mean when I pout”
“Uh yeah your not a kid don’t baby yourself”
“I don’t even mean too you know that”
He laughs resulting in you taking a hit of your cart and exhale in his face, he waves the smoke out of his face
“Rude”
“YA MOTHER, actually I take that back I love your mom so much”
“She actually asked about you last week well she asked Nick not me”
“Awe did she really?”
“Yeah she asked when you would come to visit her in Boston”
“What yall tell her?”
“Nick told her that he would ask you”
“He never did ask”
“Oh well um when would you wanna go see her and dad?”
“Next time yall take the trip out there I’ll go with yall”
A huge smile plasters across Matts face, he uses his hand to cover his face trying not to seem more happy then he needed to be
“Yeah okay, I’ll let Chris and Nick know and we’ll figure out a week to go”
“Okay perfect, I’m actually kinda excited I haven’t been in forever”
“Does this mean we’re back to being friends?”
“Absolutely” you give him a bright smiles “just make sure to not go back into bad habits, I’ll make Nick go off on you”
“Yeah yeah whatever”
“I’m serious Matthew”
“I promise I won’t go back to my old bad habits”
“Pinky promise”
I hold my pinky out so Matt can interlock his but got distracted by the feeling of the car door opening behind me, it was Chris
“UGHHHAHHHHHH MOVE”
“Chris back now don’t even start”
“She just came back and I already have to sit in the back”
“She’s a women she gets front, go”
“Ughhh”
Chris dramatically closes the door with a big huff then gets in the back with Nick
“Sorryyyyy”
“You’re not sorry you have a full smile on your face”
I couldn’t help but giggle, I missed this to be honest.
“Okay let’s get y/n home and then call it a night huh”
·:*¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨*:·
Almost 4 months have passed since the party, you started hanging out with the triples more often even if it was just to sit in there house and do work, Nick wanted you up and out of your house even making you run errands with him and Matt just like yall use to. You were mostly with Nick and sometimes Chris for the first 2 weeks but gradually starting hanging with Matt more often weither it be watching a movie together or just talking about a topic over a meal.
After a month has passed yall started going on night drives together sometimes it wouldnt even be days you were at the house he would just randomly come by your place and tell you to come downstairs. Matt always knew you enjoyed listening to music and driving around at night and it was a nice way to catch up more, matt even opened up a bit more about his insecurities and internal struggles
Now going into a new month the boys planned a trip to Boston to visit their parents and of course you’re going along, you’re currently all packed and waiting for Matt to get to your place your legs bounce with anxiety but also excitement, you haven’t seen there parents in a while
Soon enough Matt texted you that they were here, you quickly headed downstairs seeing the van putting your luggage in the back you could hear Matt screaming at Chris to get in the back, Chris gets out of the front with a huff and gestures at you the get in
“Let’s go passenger princess we don’t have all day we have a flight to catch”
“Chris just shush”
·:*¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨*:·
It’s now 6pm, trip there was nice no difficulties or anything except for Chris trying to scare you while on the plane resulting in Nick and Matt silently yelling at him cause he made you scream super loud by accident. once getting through all the airport security and whatnot yall where finally able to get outside, Nick ordered a Uber for yall while yall waited. You’re still a little tried leaning your head on Matt’s shoulder
“Y/n?”
“Hmm?”
“You okay?”
“Mhm just still tired, sorry”
“It’s okay, you can take a nap in my room when we get to the house yeah?”
“Can we eat first?”
“Mom knows we’re coming she said she’s making us dinner so you’ll eat don’t worry”
He tucks your hair behind your hair and kisses the top of your head, only recently he started being physically affectionate with you again and your fine with it he knows your boundaries
Soon enough the Uber gets there and yall head to the sturniolo household
Once there the boys head in first and you follow behind them, Mary Lou ignored the boys and engulfed you into a big hug
“Ohh honey how have you been”
“I’ve been good, how have you been?”
“Oh honey you know the same old same old nothing new around here, I’m glad to see you again I thought I wouldn’t see you again after Matt told me yall broke up”
“I thought the same thing to be honest but everything is worked out now, I’m glad to see you again and doing well”
“Same to you”
“Ayeeee look who it is, my daughter in law that’s technically not my daughter in law anymore but still definitely is to me”
You laugh at jimmys comment before he gives you a small squeeze
“It’s nice to see you again sweetheart”
“Same to you”
“Okok whatever y/n isn’t important what about your sons?”
Of course Chris had to speak up, you see Matt rushing back downstairs you didn’t even see him go upstairs
“Your stuff is in my room if you need anything”
“Thank you Matt”
“Mhm of course”
·:*¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨*:·
It’s been 3 days since yall have been in Boston it’s been a lot of family time and catching up, you’ve been sleeping in Matt’s room on his bed while he continues to protest to sleep on the couch in the living room even though youve told him multiple times that its okay for him to sleep with you.
Its currently 8pm on a wednesday evening its just you and matt in the house chilling in the living room. mary lou, jimmy, chris, and nick went out to a small get together with friends. Matt didnt wanna go out which is common, you stayed because well your not from boston and dont know anybody theyre going out with plus you really wanted to catch up on your reading since your behind.
You get up from the couch to stretch
“Imma go take a quick shower”
“You showered yesterday though?’
“Imma just wash my body off not like im washing my hair”
“Hm okay have fun”
“I guess??”
You giggle as you walk away genuinely wondering why he seemed annoyed by you going to take a shower. You clip your hair back then grab some jammies and your hygiene stuff then go to the restroom to take your quick shower. You lied about the the quick shower you actually ended up doing an everything shower minus your hair cause you felt like it, it still wasnt super long only 20 minutes. After drying off you slip on your black lace panties and your junji ito PJ pants over them, tossing on a black spagettii strap not bothering to put a bra on, You also do your skin care then clean up and head back to matts room putting your dirty clothes in the basket you and matt are sharing for the time being.
You grab your headphones, penjamin, reading glasses, and book from your bag then get comfortable on matts bed putting in your headphone and connecting them to your phone choosing your reading playlist, opening your book placing the book mark next to you and put your glasses on, finally taking a blinker cough your lungs out a bit and now ready to get completely immersed in the book.
Its been 20 minutes since you finished showering matt figured you would comeback downstairs once your done but youve been gone for 40 minutes now and it was bothering him so he went upstairs to his room to see you peacefully reading on his bed not even noticing that he walked in, he decided not to bother you and just grabbed clothes so he could go shower as well leaving you be for now until he was done.
·:*¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨*:·
I picked up my phone to check the time its 7:27pm youve been reading for a little over an hour now, you take a quick stretch then sit back down to continue reading
“Damn you still reading?”
“Oh hm?”
I look up from my book and see Matt shirtless with grey sweatpants on and damp hair. I could feel my face heating up
“I came In here earlier and you were reading I figured by the time I finished my shower you would be done, didn’t know you wear glasses though when did that start”
“Oh. Um they’re just reading glasses I’ve had them for a while now but I never really read but now I use them all the time”
“Can you look at me and point your finger up”
Confused but curious I do as he says, he takes a picture and starts laughing
“You’re so cute”
“Oh shut up, let me see”
“I’m being serious”
He walks over to me showing me his phone with a stupid smile on his face
“I look so stupid”
“Erm actually looking ahh”
“SHUT UP”
“I’m kidding I’m kidding, I think you look very beautiful with your glasses”
He places his hand under my chin making me look up at him threw my glasses
“Don’t look at me with those eyes sweetheart”
“Maybe keep your mind out of the gutter, I’m just looking at you Matt”
He chuckles and lets go of my chin
“Well I’m headed back downstairs enjoy the rest of your night”
“Matt for the love of god can you just stay up here with me”
“Naw naw I don’t wanna bother you”
“Matthew Bernard sturniolo please stay with me”
I don’t know why I’m begging, but I just wanted to be with him I wanted it to feel like old times I don’t want him to put that space between us anymore, I just want him again.
“Are you sure?”
“Matt I swear to god-“
“Okok I get it I’ll stay”
“Okay, I’m almost done with with book though so give me like 5 minutes”
The moment I pick up my book he takes it from my hand and places it in a higher spot where I can’t reach
“You’re done reading cause I’m bored and cause I said so”
“Fine”
I take off my glasses as Matt crawled into bed with me, cuddling closer to him he wraps his arm around me and plays with my hair
“What’s going on sweetheart, what’s going through your head”
“Nothing why do you think that ?”
“Well it’s just that this is the first time we’ve done this In a long time so you know”
“I just wanna be close to you I don’t know, I’m comfortable around you”
“Glad I make you feel comfortable”
He kisses my forehead continuing to run his fingers through my hair, I drape my arm over his chest scooting myself closer to him
“Matt.”
“Yes?”
“Is it bad that I don’t wanna let you go ever again”
“No, cause neither do I. You’re so important to me on so many levels just those 8 months alone went to show me that I was miserable without you”
“I’m sorry”
“Don’t apologize, you did what you had to do and guess what you learning and progressing also helped me out you know”
Just watching him talk made you smile, Matt in general makes your heart feel warm
“Matt can you kiss me?…”
“Woah..y/n I-“
“Nevermind sorry that was to mu-“
Matt cups my cheeks and places a small peck on my lips then looks at me for reassurance, I nod my head. He pulls me into another kiss it’s slow but passionate just like it’s always been, I began to move myself from my side to the middle to straddle him, my thighs on either side of his body directly placed above his slowly but surely growing erection. I break the kiss, Matt places his hands on my thighs looking up at me
“Are you sure about this”
“If I wasn’t I would tell you”
“Hmkay just making sure baby, is it okay if I mark you”
“Only if they’re hidden”
“Can I make just one of them noticeable?”
“If you buy me the pair of shoes I’ve been wanting”
I said it as a joke cause Osiris NYC 83 skate shoes are 1. Expensive and 2. Lowkey hard to find especially the color ways I want. Seeing a smile spread across Matt’s face told me that he already bought me the shoes and I should have come up with a better deal.
“Whatever your thinking in your pretty little head in correct”
He flipped us over him now being on top of me
“Safe word is meatball”
“Matthew you’ve gotta be kidding me”
He chuckles and kisses my neck
“I’m joking sweetheart gosh, you know it’s always been strawberry nothing has changed”
·:*¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨*:·
He carefully takes the clip out of your hair throwing it across the room, he kisses the side of your lip slowly going down peppering kisses over your neck he lightly bites down on your collarbone earning a whimper out of you
“Ow Matt”
“Sorry baby”
He kisses where he bit soothing his hand over it with his other hand slipping it under your shirt
“Can I take this off?”
You nod your head
“Words sweetheart”
“Yes”
“Arms up”
He easily slips your shirt off again tossing it across the room
“No bra?”
“Shut up”
“Yes ma’am”
He kisses down your chest to stomach leaving marks every once in a while, coming back to your lips giving you a small peck
“My pretty girl”
Your face heats up in embarrassment making you cover your face with your arms
“Awe come on don’t do that baby, let me see your pretty face”
You put your arms down
“There’s my beautiful girl”
“Matt just fuck me”
He chuckles “your so impatient I’m just admiring you honey, it’s been too long also just look at these beautiful tattoos on you”
He traces the stars that go down your left ribs, you squeeze you thighs together at this point everything Matt is doing just feels like teasing
“Do you really need me that bad”
“Oh shut the fuck up”
Matt slides his finger under your waist band
“When is the last time you’ve came y/n”
“Matt don’t make me answer that”
“No I wanna hear the answer”
“Matthew”
“Yes sweetheart”
You sighed knowing damn well he wasn’t gonna let it go
“The week before I ghosted you”
“Hm that was also the last time we had sex isn’t it?”
“Yes now shut up and just fuck me Matt please”
“At least you said please”
He quickly pulls down your bottoms panties included, Kissing down your stomach once again until reaching your pussy giving it a light peck
“Already wet huh?”
You close your legs around his head, you notice his eyes scanning over the tattoo on your under right thigh
“Yeah and what your gonna do about it ??”
“Eat you the fuck out”
(I would write full smut for yall but I’m genuinely so bad at it..)
·:*¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨*:·
Now naked cuddling in bed together watching SpongeBob while Matt plays with your hair making you doze off a little
“You tried sweetheart?”
“Kinda”
“Let me get some clothes on you then we can sleep yeah?”
“Yeah”
Matt grabs you a pair of his boxers and a shirt of his
“You got it or want me to do it”
“I’ll do it just throw on some boxers please, I love you and your body and your dick very much but please cover it up”
“Repeat what you said”
“Throw on some boxers please”
“After that”
“I love you?”
“I love you too”
He puts on his boxers while you slip on your as well and put his shirt on, he lays back in bed tacking you in the process
“Does this mean we’re back together?”
“Don’t rush it pretty boy ask me again in the morning and I’ll say yes as of right now though let’s sleep”
“I love you so much”
“I love you too Matt, I won’t leave you again I promise”
“You better you know much I hate when you leave, just stay”
·:*¨༺ ♱✮♱ ༻¨*:·
Ragghhh hihiiii um this is kinda an authors note i guesss sorry if this is kinda wack shit I had writters block for 8 months and this is my first writing coming out of it so be nice 3:
#matt sturniolo#matthew sturniolo#matt sturniolo x you#matt sturniolo smut#matt sturniolo x reader#sturniolo fanfic#sturniolo triplets#sturniolo smut#sturniolo x reader#Spotify#nick sturniolo#chris sturniolo#christopher sturniolo#nicolas sturniolo#chris sturniolo x reader#nick sturniolo smut#nick sturniolo x reader#nick sturniolo x you#chris sturniolo smut#chris sturniolo x you#smut
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Don't Go Blindly Into the Dark
Summary:
To hide that he can't read, Jan Van Eck has been forcing his son to pretend he's blind since he was eight years old. Wylan is now attending Ketterdam University, and meeting Jesper Fahey may very well be about to change his life. But is he safe to tell Jesper the truth? And what will Jesper say if he does?
Jesper is struggling to weigh up his life in the Barrel and his life at the University of Ketterdam, and there's a good chance that his growing debt is about to make the decision for him. He hasn't attended class consecutively for months, but maybe that will change when his newest project includes partnering up with Wylan Van Eck. But can he really leave the Barrel behind him? And how long can he keep up the pretence of who he thinks Wylan wants him to be?
Content warnings for this chapter: weapons, ptsd references, implied violence
Tags: @justalunaticfangirl @lunarthecorvus
If anyone else would like to be tagged let me know :)
AO3 link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/55445686/chapters/140852350
Chapter 5 - Kaz
“It can’t be a coincidence,”
Kaz mused over Nina’s words for a moment, the cogs in his mind turning slowly to put the pieces together. It definitely didn’t feel like a coincidence. But Kaz tended to follow a strict practice of believing nothing was a coincidence. He’d told Inej that once, and she’d nodded wisely.
“Fate has plans for us all,”
She’d been sitting on his windowsill, watching the rain running down the glass. She began to trace one with her fingertip, and he followed it with his eyes. Kaz frowned. He’d left the door open, because it was raining and he didn’t want her to open the window, but for some reason he was suddenly compelled to push it shut. Like there was something here that should be hidden, that he didn’t want to entertain the possibility of anyone else ever bearing witness to. He flexed his fingers and gripped his cane tighter, refusing to move.
“Suddenly, I believe in coincidences again,”
Inej looked at him for a moment, then back to the rain.
But it seemed very unlikely that Nina landing a strange job on the Geldstraat right before this job started was a coincidence. Kaz didn’t know what it added up to yet, but he would figure it out.
“Well, anyway,” said Nina, “I spoke to Feliks, all good for the job. He’s not thrilled about it though,”
“Of course he’s not,” said Kaz.
“He said you’ll owe him for the lost income,”
That would be more concerning if Feliks didn’t already owe Kaz money. And anyway he wasn’t really paying attention to that; mind still whirring away trying to solve the puzzle of Nina’s job on the Geldstraat last night. Not a coincidence. No such thing as a coincidence. No such thing as fate either, but Kaz really shouldn’t be thinking about that right now.
“Did they want you to go routinely? At the Geldstraat?”
Nina bit her lip.
“He said it could be an ongoing offer, if I wanted it. But he also said he lost an indentured Healer recently, if he gets someone else I don’t see him forking out any extra cash for the pleasure of my company,”
“When you say lost…?”
Nina grimaced.
“Concerningly vague,”
Kaz wasn’t surprised. He nodded.
“Alright, I’ll look into it. If this ends up being an ongoing job for you it might be good for intel. Inej is at the Crow Club, tell her to get a bag together - I want you at the university tonight,”
“Tonight? Kaz, you said two days, I have clients-”
“They’ll wait,”
“Kaz-”
“Update Inej. I need to talk to the old man,”
Nina huffed a little, but she turned on her heel and went on her way. Kaz watched the empty doorway for a moment before he slowly stood up - his leg was wreaking havoc today, and he leant heavily against his cane to find his balance. He was going to be vulnerable without the Wraith for a time, and now she was vanishing slightly earlier than expected. He’d set up a communication line but it still felt dangerous not to have her close by, gathering secrets.
“I’m not sure I’m following,” she’d admitted last night, when they were discussing the plan.
It was before word had come from Nina and she’d left to follow her to the Geldstraat. They sat in Kaz’s office at the Crow Club - the door was closed and the room had no window, but they needed privacy and there wasn’t much Kaz could do about that. He watched Inej, wondering if they would need to step outside, but she seemed fine perched cross-legged on a chair, posture perfect, hands planted on her knees. Kaz found himself studying the tiny movements in her fingers, the occasional movement of her boots against her knee as she shuffled her feet. He bought her the boots the night they came back to the Slat, because he was an idiot and he hadn’t brought anything with him for her to wear. She’d traipsed after him all the way from the very North of West Stave to the very South of East still dressed in those ridiculous purple silks, completely barefoot. It hadn’t helped the whispers amongst the Dregs about what he’d hired her for.
“What connection does any of this have?” she asked, beginning to drum her fingers against her knees.
“It’s about forming the connections,” he’d told her, “Just focus on getting close to the mark - or let Nina get close and follow suit. Then we can discuss what comes next,”
Kaz’s leg screamed at him all the way down the stairs, only quieting slightly when he began to cross the ground floor of the Slat towards Per Haskell’s office. The Slat was nothing special to look at - actually it was ugly as hell to look at, with its faded, faintly mossy eaves, the wonky boards at the front that made it look like it was leaning on the buildings either side of it for support, and the fact that it probably was leaning on them but the boards just accentuated it - but nothing had come as close to feeling like home to Kaz as the Slat did since he’d arrived in Ketterdam and his entire world was slowly pried from his weak little childish hands. That was what this city did; took everything from you. And this is what you did to survive it: demand something in return. Scrape and claw and bleed your way through the Labyrinth until you didn’t just defeat the monster at its centre, you became it. Kaz Brekker, Dirtyhands, the Bastard of the Barrel. He wasn’t quite there yet, on the very top, but he would be. He would taste the monster’s flesh, and embrace the city as his own. The Labyrinth was meant to be a prison, but if you played your cards right you could own it. And Kaz never sat down to a card game he couldn’t win.
“Enter,” came the gruff, muffled response from Per Haskell to Kaz’s sharp, single knock on the door.
It sounded like he’d already been drinking, and when the door was open the smell alone confirmed it. Kaz fought the urge to grimace, keeping his face a cool, flat mask as he closed the door behind him. There was a window in this room and for a strange, ridiculous moment Kaz almost moved to open it. He needed to get his head on straight - the Wraith wasn’t even here, and if she had been then she could open a damn window herself if she wanted to.
“Kaz, my boy,”
Haskell gestured for him to take a seat, and Kaz’s leg was putting up such a protest that for once he took up the offer.
“Sir,” he said, nodding.
Haskell grunted. He was playing with one of his little ships in a bottle things again, and for a moment just let Kaz stew whilst he drove his focus into rearranging one of the tiny pieces. Kaz didn’t get the appeal of these little models but they were popular to display in merchant houses, to sit on desks or mantelpieces like the homeowner was waiting for your gaze to linger on it just a second too long so that he could tell you a long story about it and how it’s an exact replica of a ship he, in fact, owns himself. There were two half-constructed ones sitting on Haskell’s desk that he’d given up on over the last few months, and Kaz watched the man’s meaty, and slightly shaking, fingers fumble over the details of his newest one, feeling unsurprised that he’d never been successful at finishing any. After a minute had passed Haskell sighed and plunked the thing carelessly against the table, then picked up his glass and downed the last few drops before all but slamming it back down. Kaz flexed his fingers over the crow’s head of his cane, tightening his grip.
“Brandy?” asked Haskell, as he began to pour himself another glass.
Kaz abstained.
“Alright,” the old man breathed, taking a sip before he continued: “What trouble are you here to tell me this time, then?”
What could Kaz tell him by way of trouble? That Jesper Fahey abandoned his security shift without telling anyone where he was, only for the Wraith to drag him back five hours later from a Dime Lions club? That Nina Zenik had been sent to the Geldstraat to complete a highly suspicious Tailoring job that might have had something to do with the job Kaz had been planning for so long? All he said was:
“I need Nina and Inej to start the job earlier than I thought,”
Haskell frowned.
“How long will they be gone?”
“I don’t know yet, but it’s all under control. You’ll get your twenty percent,”
Haskell’s jaw twitched. It always got on his nerves when Kaz didn’t tell him what a job was, but that wasn’t part of their agreement. And besides, Kaz didn’t want to spread the details of his plans to too many people - everything in Ketterdam leaked.
“You can’t just take my Heartrender and my best spider without telling me h-”
“They’re not yours,”
“Well they ain’t yours,” growled Haskell.
“That isn’t what I meant,”
He groaned loudly and performatively, shaking his head.
“Don’t go getting righteous on me now, boy. I want them back here within the month, at minimum,”
Kaz pursed his lips.
“I’ll try to arrange that,”
“You see that you do,”
“Yes, sir,”
Haskell snorted, but Kaz knew he lapped up every stupid politeness he gave him. He liked to think of himself as the patriarch of a large, criminally-inclined family, but everyone knew it was Kaz who did the real work. It was more of a formality for Kaz to ever tell him anything at all.
“The Black Tips are still edging away at Fifth Harbour; pushing their luck,” he said, watching Haskell run a ringer along the rim of his glass, “We should move quickly if we want to re-establish our dominance,”
Haskell waved a hand dismissively through the air,
“A mere dog yapping at our heels. Monitor the situation, if things are any worse in a few months time we can organise a parlay,”
The man really was an idiot. Kaz nodded.
“Yes, sir,”
By the time Kaz left the office, disgruntled and impatient, Nina was back at the Slat.
“Where’s Inej?”
“Upstairs getting her stuff,” Nina said, nodding vaguely towards the stairs, “You really not going to tell us anything at all?”
Kaz sighed.
“When you get to the University, go straight to the office opposite the Boeksplein; it’s 24 hour, and they should be expecting you. You just arrived from Ravka - private journey, pepper it in because the tourist ferries don’t arrive this late - and there should be transfer papers waiting in your name. They might kick up a fuss about you being early, accommodation-wise, but-”
“But we’re two young rich girls from Ravka, it’s the middle of the night, we’re exhausted from travelling, and we’ve nowhere else to go,” Nina finished in a falsely distressed voice, winking at him, “I think I can manage that,”
“Good,” he handed her a thin stack of kruge, “That’s a month’s salary in advance, if it takes longer I’ll give you more but if it’s shorter I’ll need it back,”
She narrowed her eyes.
“This is your money? Not the Dregs’?”
He shrugged. He had to pay her somehow.
“Thank you, Kaz,”
“You won’t be any use to me if you run out of cash and starve,”
Nina sighed, tucking the notes into her pocket.
“Well thank you anyway,”
#don't go blindly into the dark#no beta read#six of crows#grishaverse#crooked kingdom#leigh bardugo#kaz brekker#inej ghafa#jesper fahey#wylan van eck#nina zenik#kanej#wesper fic#kanej fic#wesper#wylan hendriks#soc fanfiction#soc fandom#soc fic#six of crows fandom#six of crows fanfic#six of crows fic#six of crows duology#grishaverse fanfic#grishaverse fandom
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I don't need space, I need you
Mattheo and Theodore fluff
Based on this request, please don't hate me for taking 29 days to post this rather average piece, but I had a lot of requests and not a lot of time. I hope you like it!
Finally I had time to write today! Big yey for me, people. I needed it and I'm so happy I wrote something today. 💛 Sending you lots of love and of course: happy readings!
A/N: I got some stuff going on in life so if I don't respond, I'm sorry. Just know that I love you. 💛
Mattheo
“Where’s my princess?” Mattheo sings as he enters the common room in search of you. “Not here, I would check the library.” Blaise states not looking up from his book. Mattheo nods and is about to turn around to head straight for the library, but Draco’s snickering stops him from doing so. “I bet you’re pleased to have a moment of peace.” Mattheo focuses on Draco, not completely getting where the blond's going with this. “I honestly pity you, man, must be so suffocating.” Suddenly all eyes are on Mattheo and not just his friends, the entire slytherin common room is curious to hear what the big bad boy has to say. Mattheo moves a nervous hand through his curls and chuckles. “Yeah, she’s a bit much with her hugs and cuddles, and urgh those constant questions to check on me. I’m lucky she studies so much, so I have a break from time to time.” Mattheo sits down opposite of Draco who grins and nods, fully believing that Mattheo feels saved by your absence. However, Mattheo felt miserable sitting there, knowing that he could be spending time with you.
Just like Mattheo was searching the castle for you, you had been searching for him and ended up checking the common room. With watery eyes you turn around, unnoticed by anyone, and leave the common room. He thinks I’m too much?
***
“Who is it?!” Mattheo yells as he pushes you against the wall of an empty hallway. He rarely raised his voice with you, but now his face was close to yours, his eyes dark and piercing yours. He looks more pained than angry, but you just look confused. To him it was obvious, you had fallen out of love with him and probably found someone else. There was plenty of proof:
A quick kiss on the lips and a wish of good luck before Tuesday's test was all Mattheo got, instead of the tight hug and intense kiss you would normally give him before a test.
When you got your results back on Wednesday you jumped into Luna’s arms and just gave him a happy smile, while he was standing right there next to Luna. His heart ached to hold you and press you against his chest. Worse was when you asked Enzo about his test first and ended up discussing all the answers, barely giving your boyfriend any attention.
Thursday you went to sit next to Pansy in the common room, instead of settling in your boyfriend’s lap. Mattheo was forced to watch you the whole evening without touching you once. When you left for bed, you told him not to walk you to your room and reminded him to spend some much needed time with his friends. The sweet kiss you gave him, didn’t make up for any of it.
Were you trying to get rid of him? To Mattheo the case was obvious.
Friday was the worst. Happy to finally have you next to him as you were both reading, settled close by the fire. With his eyes still on the page of his own book his arm moved behind you to pull you closer and you let your head rest on his shoulder as you continued to read, but still Mattheo frowned. Normally you would sling your legs over his and cuddle up against his chest, wrapping your blanket around the both of you and creating this warm bubble of love. He could barely focus on his book, as his eyes constantly wandered to you reading next to him but not cuddled up against him like you used to.
So by Saturday Mattheo had pretty much had it with you. You rubbed your temple as squeezed your eyes. “I have a headache, I’m gonna head to my room and rest for a bit.” You got up from your seat to leave the library and Mattheo did the same. If you weren’t feeling well then he needed to be by your side. “Oh, don’t Matt. I’ll be fine. I’ll ask Pansy to give me something against the pain and settle next to me until I fall asleep.” Mattheo stood perplexed as you just kissed him and left. Now he wasn’t even good enough to take care of you anymore.
This was the moment he snapped. With stern strides he follows you.
“Who is it?!” You frowned at the question and met Mattheo’s dark eyes. “Obviously, you’re done with me. So who’s better than me, huh?” His voice was filled with anger, but his question sounded so heartbreaking, that you felt no need to get angry with him for pushing you against the wall and snapping at you. You cup his cheeks and softly shake your head. “Matt, I love you. I have no idea what you’re talking about.” Your voice is calm and endearing, reminding him of how much he needed your love. You were always so gentle with him and feeling you slip away the past week hurt so much that he felt like falling apart on the spot. He's too hurt and afraid to lose you to act tough and with a whisper he confesses his worries. “You don’t check up on me anymore. You don’t wish me luck before a test like you used to. We don’t cuddle anymore.” You stare at him in silence for a moment, you had never seen Mattheo this soft and vulnerable before.
Your hands still resting on his cheeks move to his neck as you wrap your arms around him and pull him against you. Mattheo snuggles his face in your neck, embarrassed with himself and desperate for your warmth. You rest your head against his and your fingers move through his curls, making him sigh at your touch. “You told Draco I was a bit too much. So I backed off, because I didn’t want to lose you. I know I can get clingy sometimes, I’m sorry.” Mattheo moves away to look at you and his eyes look guilty. “No, no. Don’t apologise. Don’t be sorry. I love you clingy and cuddly. I need you to be around me.” Your eyebrows knit together. “But I heard you say-” Mattheo interrupts you and shakes his head. “I was being stupid. Don’t listen to the things I say. Just stay with me and love me… overwhelm me with everything you have.” You tilt your head in confusion. “No, I mean listen to me, just forget about what I said back then. I- I was trying to act tough so I pretended to- you know.” You chuckle. “You pretended not to like cuddles, because you wanted to be a tough guy?” Embarrassed with himself Mattheo nods. “I’m a softy for you and I need my daily dose of love. I don’t need space.”
You sigh at Mattheo’s pouty face. “My boyfriend’s an idiot.” Mattheo nods and leans in for a kiss. “Please, let me take you to your room and let me take care of you, because I want nothing more than to be around you.” You pull him in for another intense kiss as an answer and as you walk to your dorm, he squeezes your hand the whole time walking.
Theodore
“Where’s my lady?” Theodore frowns as he sits down opposite of Blaise, who raises his shoulders without looking up from his book. Theo shakes his head in annoyance, he needed you like he needed cigarettes. He spent the whole day longing for your love and warm embraces. Merlin, all he wanted right now was for you to entangle your fingers with his hair and ask him about his day. “For once the two of you aren’t attached to the hip.” Mattheo quips and Draco snickers. “Must be refreshing to have a moment to yourself.” Theodore stays silent for a moment and a little further, near the common room entrance you halt in your step. “She’s so mothering, it’s almost toxic. I don’t know how you do it, mate.” Draco wiggles his eyebrows at Theo as Mattheo talks. “You know, if you ever need us to come save you, we could always come up with a code word.” Draco offers and Theodore chuckles, not knowing what to say. “It’s not toxic, but I’m happy to have a moment with you guys, because she can be a bit much. She’s always so… clingy.” You chew your lip and slowly take a step back, leaving the common room as the word ‘clingy’ rings in your head.
***
You didn’t want to lose your boyfriend due to being too clingy. So you decided to keep your distance.
Instead of spending your evening studying cuddled up with your boyfriend you ask Hermione to help you out with potions who of course never passes the opportunity to study. Keeping up his tough act in front of his friends, Theodore can’t protest as you leave the common room to go study with your friend instead of with him. Theo feels himself get cold as he sits by the fireplace with his friends. If you’re not there to keep him warm the room just feels empty and even the conversations are boring. He can’t help but curse himself for letting you go study with Hermione. Having to make peace with an evening without you, Theodore longs for the next day and having you next to him during breakfast while you talk about your plans for the day.
The next morning, at breakfast Theo only gets a small kiss from you before you turn to Pansy gossiping about some third years. Theodore can’t resist but snake an arm around you and you love his touch, but you try not to be too clingy and decide to not fully lean against him. Your boyfriend is happy to have you next to him, but disappointed that you stay engaged with Pansy’s gossip instead of giving him some much needed attention. Why were you not combing his hair with your fingers until it looked the way you preferred it? Why were you not checking if he had done all his homework? What was so bloody interesting about Pansy’s conversation?!! He was getting so annoyed that he was caught by surprise when you kissed him tenderly and headed for class. His mind and body were screaming to have you back by his side and walk you to class, but he just turned to his breakfast and spent the morning sulking.
Finally, after two days, he had you close to him, settled on his bed with a book in your hand. You were all alone in his room and you both enjoyed the peace and quiet. You lay between his legs with his arms around you, while his head rested on yours, reading some of the paragraphs of your book but mostly taking in your warmth and scent. He gives you a soft kiss on your cheek and you smile and lean against his chest. “I love you.” You whisper and his eyes shine even brighter than he smiles. “Love you too.” However, your romantic moment is ruined when Blaise and Mattheo enter. “Astronomy tower?” Mattheo raises his eyebrows at Theo who is about to decline the invitation, but you speak up first. “I was just about to meet up with Luna.” You jump up and Theodore's eyes go furious at the suggestion of you leaving. “No you’re not.” Theo snaps at you, shaking everyone in the room. “Why are you so eager to get away from me?” Theo questions and Blaise and Mattheo’s eyes move from their friend to you. You take a step back at your boyfriend's accusation. “I’m not. I’m just giving you space so you can hang out with your friends.” Theo shoots Blaise and Mattheo a dark glare. “Out! Both of you!”
As soon as the duo closes the door behind them and you and Theodore are left alone in the room Theodore gets up and towers over you. “I don’t want space, I want you. So tell me what’s going on, because I can’t stand it anymore.” His voice is stern, but you feel yourself relax as you no longer have to act differently and you can finally be honest with him. “You think I’m clingy and sometimes I’m too much… and I get that and I don’t want to lose you… so I did my best to give you some space in the hopes of saving our relationship.” Theodore’s heart aches at the soft tone of your voice. How could he make you feel like you were too much when you were all he wanted. “I’m such a shit boyfriend.” Theo sighs as he sits back down on his bed, making you frown and join him. “No, I was too much.” Theo’s head snaps to you. “You are not. I didn’t want those idiots to think I was whipped or soft or- so I said you were clingy, but you're not, if anything I am… I want you around 24/7.” Your eyes widen at his confession. “Soooo, you’re saying that ‘the’ Theodore Nott is so in love with me that he prefers cuddling over hanging with his friends.” Your boyfriend chuckles. “Yeah, so please just go back to reading in my arms and make me the happiest man alive.” You lean towards him and he meets your lips. The sweet kiss quickly turns passionate as you both fall back on the bed.
For the ones who asked to be tagged, here you go lovies: @ho3forfakeguys and @bitchoftoji
#mattheo riddle imagine#mattheo riddle#mattheo riddle x reader#slytherin boys#slytherin#theodore nott imagine#theodore nott#theodore nott x reader#pepercorgiworldwritings
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baby steps ♡ yandere!leon kennedy x reader
nsfw (18+) - minors dni or i will call ur mom. and also the cops
word count: 5k
description: moving to raccoon city with leon, your long-term boyfriend and childhood sweetheart, doesn't go as planned. while you consider moving back home to lick your wounds, leon conspires to keep you right by his side, where you were always meant to be.
tags/warnings: yandere!leon kennedy, specifically rookie cop leon, squishy soft dom leon, manipulation and generally toxic behavior, baby trapping (via tampering w condoms), daddy kink, praise kink, pet names, no use of y/n, fingering, p in v, creampie, cockwarming, mention of vomiting
a/n: this piece was commissioned by #1 Soft Dom Rookie Leon Truther and My Feral Puppy Wife @nexysworld ,, pls pls check out her work, she's so very talented and sweet and i am lucky to call her a friend ;w; <33
hopefully if u made it this far u read the tags and know what ur in for, but out of an abundance of caution i would like to reiterate that this is a yandere!leon fic and therefore contains dark themes a la dubious/uninformed consent and unhealthy relationship dynamics. if that's a no-no for u, pls kindly move on and take care of urself !!
my masterlist ♡
my ao3 ♡
fic under the cut, thanks so much for reading and i hope u enjoy ;w;
-venus ♡
Leon had it all figured out from the day he met you, the first day of kindergarten. The two of you were going to be just like the movies, just like the storybooks– you would grow up as friends, blossom into lovers, marry young and start a family, and everything would be exactly as it should be. He would have fulfilled his purpose, and you would have fulfilled yours. All would be right in the universe.
And he wasn’t exactly far off, for a long time. You were attached at the hip through elementary school, somehow managed to stay friends through middle school and after an awkward, smitten kiss shared in the empty auditorium, you began dating in high school. It was perfect, he thought. He didn’t even have to pull that many strings.
You went to prom, got drunk for the first time, learned to drive, all in each other’s company. You had each other’s virginity. You’d seen, touched and savored every inch of each other. There was almost nothing you didn’t share.
It wasn’t too long after graduation that Leon applied to begin training at the police academy, just like he’d always dreamed of. It was a solid profession with plenty of benefits for both of you and it would give him the opportunity to help people, ticking off all the boxes of what he wanted for himself. It was perfect, it was safe.
No one was surprised when he soared through the police academy with impeccable marks. You were such a little angel when he graduated, showering him with kisses and sweets and letting him pound you into the mattress for a whole weekend to celebrate. And when his application in Raccoon City was accepted, you did exactly as he hoped you would and you followed right along with him.
Of course you would follow right along. You didn’t know what life without Leon meant. You couldn’t even conceptualize what that would feel like and you had no intention of finding out, but that was fine by him. He was happy to be your rock, your guidance, your big, strong boyfriend who would hold your hand and follow you through everything.
With Leon, you would never be alone. You would never be far from home. After all this time, he was your home, exactly as your lives were designed.
For the first few months of living in Raccoon City, the two of you shared a cozy apartment. It was a little worse for wear, but it was cute, and it was a fun way to start your adventure into young adulthood together. He was happy to handle all of the spiders and quadruple check the locks every night if it made you feel safer, if it gave you an excuse to come crying to him like a beautiful angel whenever you were frightened.
Bumps in the night, creaks of the pipes, the skittering of the upstairs neighbor’s little dog, they all sent you folding into his arms, shaking like a leaf, crying for him to protect you. He was your knight, and God were you his perfect little princess. The apple of his eye, the one and only object of his affection. No, not his affection, his obsession.
You were all he thought about, day and night, for more than half of his 21 years of living. Everything he did, every breath he took was with you in mind. You were the only living manifestation of complete and total perfection, every inch of you crafted with care and divinity. Your lives fit together like puzzle pieces– hell, your bodies fit together like puzzle pieces. You were meant for each other.
It wasn’t long after you moved that the job you had lined up fell through, and you were left reeling. Moving away from home just to fall flat on your face was a massive blow to your self esteem, especially considering your parents practically screamed a hole through the phone at you about it. The next few days were spent sulking around the apartment, trying to pick up the pieces and choose a completely different path for yourself.
And there was Leon to hold you while you cried. To make dinner every night and dote on you endlessly, to pamper you with gifts and to insist over and over that he could make rent on his own, that he didn’t mind if you needed a little more time to wallow before finding a job… and to console you when your search for employment would prove fruitless once again.
He was there to tell you it wasn’t your fault, that the job market was just rough right now and that no matter what, he would be there to take care of you.
Weeks stretched into months and you still felt like you were spinning out, even with Leon by your side. Every single day was beginning to feel the same and you didn’t know what to do, all you knew was that you couldn’t imagine living the rest of your life like this. Something had to give and Raccoon City clearly wasn’t it.
Leon came home with a big smile on his face, just like any other day, but today was extra special. He’d finally had his one year review at the police station, and he was getting a sizable raise. He couldn’t wait to tell you he was gonna get you out of this shitty apartment and into somewhere nicer. He couldn’t wait to sneak his way down to the jeweler in search of a ring. The storybook life he had laid out for you was coming to fruition right before his eyes.
But you were quiet over dinner, and you looked exhausted. You wouldn’t even meet his eyes as you picked at your plate.
He was just about to ask you what was wrong when you finally spoke up, “I-I think I need to move back home with my parents.”
Silence. He felt like he had been shot.
“It’s just that… I know you said you’re happy to take care of bills and everything, but I just feel terrible every day being a burden and I think I need a chance to figure things out and get back up on my feet. I don’t even know what I’m doing with my life anymore.”
His expression fell and his heart ached, any and all excitement he had about his situation now gone in an instant. All the money in the world meant nothing to him if he couldn’t share it with you, and to see you so lost and scared made him feel like he fucking failed you, his poor, sweet princess who looked to him for purpose and protection and partnership.
Leon wasn’t stupid. He knew that allowing you to move back in with your parents could potentially be a death sentence to your relationship. When people aren’t around each other anymore, it’s only natural that they drift apart, and Leon could not let that happen. It wasn’t even an option in his brain. Something had to be done and something had to be done now, before your lease was up in a few months, before push came to shove and you would finally have to make your choice.
He wasn’t even really sure where he got the idea. It wasn’t something he’d ever considered before, mostly because he didn’t think he’d ever be put in this position.
A few nights after that conversation, Leon couldn’t sleep. It was well past two in the morning and you were peacefully asleep beside him while he stared at the ceiling, entirely lost in thought. He witnessed the worst and darkest of humanity at work every single day, but nothing scared him as deeply as the idea of losing you.
Eventually he got out of bed as carefully as he could manage, not wanting to wake you with his troubles. He only planned to get some water and maybe a minute or two of fresh air to clear his mind, but what he didn’t plan to get was some inspiration.
You had asked him to stop at the store on his way home from work to pick up a few things you needed, and the bag was still sitting on the counter. He took it upon himself to grab a few things he needed, too, and among the items left in the bag was an unopened box of condoms. At first his eyes skimmed over it without much interest, but it wasn’t long before he froze where he stood and turned to look at the bag again.
Leon wasn’t sure what came over him. He didn’t really feel like himself, it was like he was watching his next moves from a third person perspective, hovering above, detached. For a moment he even wondered if he was sleepwalking, or if this was a dream. He stared down at the box in his hand, carefully opened it, and pierced a hole in the center of each and every one. He tucked the packets back into the box and brought it with him on his way back to the bedroom, stashing it in the usual spot in the bedside table.
On his side, of course.
He tried to go back to sleep, but he couldn’t help but just watch you. You were so pretty, so peaceful when you were dreaming, such a nice contrast to the stress and insecurity over finding your life’s purpose that plagued you in your waking hours.
But Leon already knew your life’s purpose. He reached out, gently brushing your messy hair away from your sleepy face so he could admire you more fully, and all he could think about was how much happier you’d look with a ring on your finger and a baby in your belly. Maybe an unexpected nudge in the right direction would set you back on the correct path and make you come to your senses about moving back in with your parents.
You huffed out a sleepy little breath from between your plush lips, stirring in the bed and peeking open your eyes to look at him. It was clear you weren’t fully conscious yet, but you were trying, squirming closer to him to tuck yourself into his chest.
“W’time is it?” You mumbled, rubbing your eyes.
He smiled fondly, petting your hair and pressing a kiss to the crown of your head as you cuddled up to him like a sweet little baby bear, and he tried to pretend he hadn’t accidentally made himself hard as fuck thinking about knocking you up just to get you to stay with him. Somewhere deep down, he knew it was gross, he knew it was wrong, he knew it could violate your trust in so many ways.
But Leon was nothing if not a yearner, a hopeless romantic who couldn’t bear the thought of life without you by his side. He’d done everything right by you and you were still straying away from him, and that just wouldn’t do. It’s an act of desperation, he thought to himself, justifying his actions into the ground, I just want her so badly I’m not thinking straight, all pleas for forgiveness he would store for later use.
“It’s late, baby,” He mumbled into your hair, breathing in the scent of your shampoo. “I’m sorry if I woke you up.”
You just shook your head and tightened your arms around him, clearly on the verge of dozing off again. Perhaps if the circumstances were different, he would have just let you, but he wouldn’t be awake in the first place if it weren’t for the extreme sense of urgency he felt.
His broad, warm hands engulfed you, one cradling the back of your head while the other rubbed your lower back, tapering off to paw at your hip. Your shirt– well, his shirt– had ridden up nearly to your waist, baring your cute panties, your soft belly and your plush thighs to his gaze. He swiped the pad of his thumb along your hip, imagining your bone structure spreading open to make room for his growing baby.
Leon didn’t take the time to talk himself out of it before his fingertips were sneaking down between your legs, slipping beneath your panties and finding your clit with practiced ease. The sensation was enough to jerk you awake again, a quiet mewl tumbling from your lips as you rocked into his hand, so sleepy and out of it and just so very cute.
“Leon?” Your voice was thick with sleep, but airy and light with sudden onset desire. That was all he needed to know he had you right where he wanted you.
“Shh, shh, you’re alright,” He cooed softly, following up the soothing whispers with a few gentle nibbles and bites to the shell of your ear, knowing that such attention always melted you into a puddle. “You’re alright, pretty baby, I just wanna play with you. Can daddy play with his sweet angel?”
You squirmed in his hold for a second, pondering his proposition while barely awake, but it wasn’t long before you were nodding into his shoulder and peppering his collarbone with wet kisses in return. It never took much to convince you when he spoke to you like that, so adoring and saccharine.
“That’s my good girl,” He mused, invigorated by your consent. Almost instantaneously he became more heavy-handed with his touches, fingertips massaging firm, purposeful circles around your clit, occasionally dipping down to collect your growing arousal and bring it back with him. “You’re all mine, you know that? Never gonna let anyone else have my baby.”
Poor you. Clueless of his intentions, you interpreted that sentence in a much different way than he really meant it. But, ignorance is bliss, and what you felt right now was nothing short of blissful.
You poked your head up just to catch his lips with your own in a wanton grasp for more intimacy, a signal of your agreement, like you were giving yourself to him. He knew it was wrong that you didn’t fully realize what you were agreeing to, but again, he compartmentalized that, deciding that was a problem for his future self. What mattered right now was securing your place at his side for the rest of your lives.
He could feel the way your hips were stuttering, he could feel how short your breaths were becoming against his lips, and he knew you were getting close. Grunting into your mouth, he forced his hand further down your panties and sank two thick fingers into your hole, stretching you open for him. The intrusion was quite a bit less gentle than you were used to from him, drawing a shocked whimper from you, but you soon began to relax once more when he curled up into your sweet spot, sending you boneless.
“D-Daddy,” You whined, nails biting into his shoulders. “Hurts… Slow, slower…”
A shiver rolled over his body, that of immediate guilt. He knew he was being a little rough with you, and he certainly didn’t want to hurt you, but…
“Fuck, I can’t help it,” He groaned, “Been thinking about this pussy all night, princess, I need you like air…”
You could hear the desperation in his tone, and even more you could feel it in the way he touched you like he was starving, like he was stranded in the desert and you were an oasis. Softened by this– and entirely hypnotized by his praise– you resigned to the feeling, allowing him to play with your body as he pleased. He was rutting into nothing without even thinking about it, his cock woefully hard and straining against the front of his grey sweatpants.
He wanted to prepare you properly, he really did, but he was so revved up and needy, he didn’t want to risk blowing his load anywhere but inside you. That wasn’t an option. Hands shaking, he pulled away from you just long enough to kick his sweatpants off and reach for one of those condoms, silently resenting the fact that he had to wear one at all, but he had an appearance to keep up.
He tore the package open haphazardly with his teeth and rolled the condom on, shuddering deeply. His grasp was tight on your thigh as he pulled it up and over his hip, his other hand pushing your dainty purple panties aside to guide his cock into the heavenly, pillowy walls of your ethereal cunt.
Fuck, you were so fucking tight, clenching around him, whimpering and whining and writhing like a perfect little puppy in heat. Leon’s teeth sank into your shoulder as he bottomed out in you, and he almost could have sworn he felt the tip of the condom rip open even wider. The image alone had him moaning like an animal, pinning your quivering body to his own while he rolled his hips, fucking you deep and hard and slow, savoring every single stroke of your slippery walls around his aching cock. Every meeting of your hips was joined by obscene squelching with the way you were practically sucking him in.
“G-God, fuck,” Leon growled, his face contorted with pleasure. You and Leon had always had what you considered to be an active and healthy sex life, but you’d never seen him quite so beside himself with raw lust. Whatever drove him in that moment was primal, and you could feel it in his every movement, his every breath, see it in the wild look in his eyes.
His pupils were like dinner plates as he gazed down at you, stamping your forehead with kisses and feeling over every inch of your body. “Look at you, just look at you… Such a perfect little dolly for daddy to love on forever and ever, huh? Oh, my princess…”
You were lightheaded with arousal, every nerve ending in your body lighting up with white hot pleasure. You could barely even form a sentence, just nodding along as he moaned out his praise and letting him manhandle you like a ragdoll. Perhaps his words had more than a modicum of truth to them.
“F-Feels so… so… fuck, daddy, feels so good,” You babbled mindlessly, head falling back to the pillows beneath you. He was overwhelming your senses, taking over every corner of your mushy brain. The room was dark and you were still a bit delirious with sleep and to that effect, nothing existed in your world right now but daddy, daddy, daddy…
He laughed softly, pressing a kiss to the spot on your shoulder he’d so harshly bitten earlier, the pace of his thrusts not faltering for a second. “Yeah? I’ll bet it does, judging by the look on you,” He teased, nipping at your throat. “So pretty when you’re all fucked out.”
Your back was arching up off the bed, your eyes rolling back and your walls pulsing around him. Addicted to eliciting pleasured reactions from you, Leon wedged one hand between your two bodies, flattening his palm on your lower belly before pressing down.
Stars. You saw stars. A broken, high-pitched cry ripped from your throat, and you didn’t even have the capacity to hope the neighbors didn’t think you were being murdered, because you didn’t care. You could feel every rigid inch of him inside you, dragging over every nerve, his cock stuffed so deep that you swore you could feel him in your throat. Toes curling and your nails raking down his naked back, tears were beginning to prick at your eyes– you were close.
That was a good thing, though, considering he was too, and he could only hope the wet heat of your release would mask the feeling of his own. Leon sealed his lips over your own once more, swallowing your broken, needy cries as he fucked you to completion, letting his hand fall a little bit lower until his fingertips were on your clit again.
Your body twitched at the stimulation, thighs clamping down tight around his hips as you sobbed into his mouth and soaked his cock with your gushing sex. “Daddy,” You wept, clinging to him for dear life as he fucked you through your high, his own spilling out in sync. “Daddy, daddy, daddy…”
“Shh, I’ve got you, baby, I’m right here,” He cooed, taking your bottom lip playfully between his teeth before pressing a gentle kiss to the tip of your nose. “Just stay put, you’re doing so good for me, angel…”
His hips continued to piston forward as he hoped to force as much of his cum into you as he could manage, while still maintaining the believable illusion of protection. He intended to put every last one of those tampered-with condoms to use, though he wondered silently to himself if you might give up and just let him take you raw once you were to inevitably find out you’re pregnant.
You were a weeping, shivering mess in his arms, thighs clenching and twitching around him as he shushed you and babied you, petting your hair away from your tear-stained face and stamping you with delicate kisses, still stuffing his cum into you with shallow thrusts. He couldn’t wait to see you blossom right before his eyes. He couldn’t wait for you to realize your purpose was right here with him. He couldn’t wait to have you to himself for the rest of your days, his princess.
Leon remained sheathed deep within you, even as he softened, wanting to make sure you stayed plugged up well. But, he also couldn’t resist the warmth and wetness of you, how comforting it felt to be enveloped by you.
“You just stay put right there, okay, princess?” He reiterated quietly, lips brushing over your brow in a loving kiss. “Want you to keep daddy warm for the rest of the night. Can you do that for me?”
As if he even had to ask. You would have done practically anything for him when reduced to such a bleary, agreeable state of mind. He knew you all too well.
You just nodded like a bobblehead, dreamy, doe eyes staring up at him through teary lashes, hanging off his every word like gospel. He tucked you in even closer to his chest, cradling you with such adoration, his hips rocking forward every now and then just to get a reaction out of you, and to remind himself this was real.
He wasn’t at all surprised that you were able to fall asleep like that, stuffed full of cum and sated like a good little princess deserved to be. In a perfect world, you would never have to move again, just stay there in his lap forever and soak up every drop of him you could take.
In the coming weeks, that box of condoms wouldn’t last long. The only thought on his mind day in and day out was bending you over every surface in the apartment, and you thought nothing of it. Of course you noticed his sudden, insatiable lust for you, but you assumed it was a symptom of knowing his beloved girlfriend was just a few short months away from potentially leaving. He was only grasping at every inch of you he could commit to memory, right?
In all fairness to you, you weren’t exactly that far off.
Your tired eyes pried open at the familiar feeling of Leon rutting up against you, gripping at your hips like you would disappear if he didn’t. The morning sun was just barely beginning to peek through the windows and the bed was warm, it was a lovely way to wake up, one you would never get tired of.
Or at least you never thought you would. You loved Leon— and his sexual prowess— very dearly, but you also loved being able to sleep through an entire night without interruption, and you hadn’t been getting much of that over the past several weeks.
“Mnh… Leon, babe,” You grumbled, burying your face back into your pillow. “Not today. I’m exhausted.”
He was taken aback by this at first, and then his expression fell with disappointment. Leon had gotten so used to breeding you dumb every morning before work that he wasn’t confident he could go back to functioning without it. Regardless, Leon knew that continuing his attempt to seduce you while you were this grouchy would be a death sentence, so he opted to take the path of least resistance.
After the moment or two it took for him to process that decision, Leon’s touches quickly shifted from provocative to soothing– he was no longer grasping at your hips but wrapping you up in his arms, pressing gentle kisses to your temple and cheekbone as if to regain your good favor.
You hummed contentedly, relaxing back into his embrace. Leon always warmed up like a heater in the night, and you were more than happy to bask in it. His muscular frame was like a weighted blanket and his presence alone was usually enough to knock you out like a light, but for some reason, you were struggling to fall back asleep. Every second felt like five minutes and despite your best efforts– and your complete and utter exhaustion– sleep refused to reclaim you.
Biting back the urge to blame Leon for waking you up in the first place, you huffed out a breath and rolled over in his arms, hoping the change in position might be just what you needed.
Wrong. Very, very wrong. Something about the movement made you dizzy, nauseous, your stomach twisting into knots. You wanted to say something, but you weren’t even sure what to say. It came on so suddenly that it caught you off guard and you weren’t even fully confident you would be able to get up at first.
You whined his name quietly, nuzzling into his chest and wrenching your eyes shut in an attempt to reorient yourself, your arms closing around your middle instinctively.
“You alright? What’s the matter?” Your sweet boyfriend asked quietly, brows furrowing with concern. He could feel your body trembling against his own, your back rising and falling with short, shallow breaths.
Now it was your throat tightening, too, and the second your mouth started to flood with saliva, you knew what was about to happen. Leon didn’t stop you when you writhed out of his embrace and stumbled out of bed, depending on muscle memory alone to get yourself to the bathroom with how woozy and ill you felt.
You just barely made it to the toilet in time to vomit. The cold tile felt nice on your knees, but the impact, not as much. It wasn’t long before Leon materialized at your side with a glass of water and a cold washcloth to hold over your forehead, rubbing your back and already silently conspiring to call out of work and give his poor, sick angel the princess treatment all day.
You collapsed back into his chest with a deep shudder, reaching for the water in a desperate attempt to wash the taste of bile from your mouth. He ended up grabbing it for you, raising it to your cracked lips and helping you take slow, measured drinks.
“There you go, pup,” He hummed, rocking you gently in his lap, his poor little darling princess. “I’m sorry you’re not feeling well.”
Your eyes fluttered closed, a sense of relief washing over you at last. Maybe you just caught a bug, or ate something your body didn’t agree with, or your stress and exhaustion were finally catching up to you. Surely you would feel better within a few days.
“I’m okay,” You whispered, reaching for his hand and squeezing it affectionately. “Thanks for taking care of me.”
Leon smiled, a burst of warmth spreading through his chest. You couldn’t possibly imagine what that meant to him, considering he chose to interpret it in whatever way felt most validating. After all, no one could take care of you like Leon could, and they wouldn’t have the chance to try, anyway. Not over his dead body.
Stooping down to kiss the crown of your head, Leon’s every word was thick with syrupy sweetness, “My baby, I would be so lost if I didn’t. Taking care of you is like breathing to me.”
And he meant every part of it. He didn’t just mean it, he showed it. He showed it when he held your hair back, and he showed it when you realized you couldn’t even remember when you’d had your last period. He showed it when you sent him to the drugstore in the middle of the night for pregnancy tests, and he showed it when you broke down crying at the results, wondering how this could have happened.
His favorite part was showing it when you tearfully called your parents and told them you were staying in Raccoon City, not because you had found a job, but because you were pregnant.
“I can’t believe they’re choosing to react like this, sweetheart, I’m so sorry. They should be happy for you, and it’s awful that they’re anything but happy for you,” He said, voice low and soothing, tone purposeful. “I’ve got you, princess. I’ve got you. I’m gonna take good care of you and this baby, and we’re gonna be happy. Alright?”
Leon tipped your chin up with his knuckle, making you look at him. Your cheeks were red and your eyes were puffy with tears, droplets still clinging to your little dolly eyelashes.
It was hard not to believe him when he spoke with such conviction, when he looked at you with those rich blue eyes that bled from an endless well of love. The pad of his thumb skimmed over your pouty bottom lip as you unknowingly submitted to his grand design.
#venustext#sintext#resident evil#leon kennedy#yandere!leon kennedy#dark!leon kennedy#leon kennedy x reader#yandere!leon kennedy x reader#dark!leon kennedy x reader#leon kennedy smut#leon kennedy x you
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who the hell is rocky? * fem!driver
who the hell does sebastian keep calling 'rocky'?
pairings: sebastian vettel x fem!driver, max verstappen x fem!driver, logan sargeant x fem!driver, oscar piastri x fem!driver
notes: here ok now she has a nICKNAME OK IT'S ROCKY IT'S ROCKY OK BECAUSE SHE LIKES ROCKY ROAD ICE CREAM NOW
(series masterlist)
she presses her lips together, turning the knob and peeking in. “seb,” she whispers into the room. “are you in here?”
sebastian raises an eyebrow, tilting his head. “yeah, why?”
“great, so i wouldn’t feel as bad sneaking in here.” she pushes the door open and quickly shuts the door behind her. she beams at him, shoving her hands into her jacket. “hi!”
he looks up at her, head still hung low from the papers he was looking at. “what do you want?”
“oh, we’re playing hide and seek with jack and laura,” she grins, walking over to the empty seat at the his table. she sits down and tucks her legs under her body. “and oscar, logan, mick… liam… i’m not in the mood to be found so soon.”
“so you’re hiding here? in my office?” sebastian raises an eyebrow, looking back down at his papers. “isn’t that cheating?”
“they didn’t specify where i couldn’t hide.” she puts her palms down against his table with a small grin. she extends her neck a little bit. “what are you doing?”
he flips the papers towards his body, shielding its contents away from her. “i’m looking at data. you’re not a cheater — go play hide and seek properly.”
she shrugs nonchalantly. “i’m the oldest child. of course, i bend the rules to make sure i win.”
“really? oscar and logan let you do that growing up while they were around?”
“no, they put a stop to that when i turned 14,” she presses her lips together and rolls her eyes, shaking her head. “but they can’t erase that trait when i spent my whole life polishing it.”
sebastian blinks. “seriously?”
“yeah,” she nods excitedly. “how do you think i got this scar above my brow?”
“from falling down.”
“no, ciara and i fought cause i changed the rules at the last second so that i’d win and then she attacked me.” she lets a moment pass when sebastian finally lifts his head to stare at her. “we were playing uno — it’s a very intense game.”
he furrows his eyebrows. “get out of my office, rocky!”
sebastian approaches the two hunched over in the corner. “have you guys seen rocky?”
logan lifts his head. “rocky? who the hell is that?”
“hey, what are you guys doing?” they turn around, seeing the younger driver with an ice cream pint in her hand with mick trailing behind her.
“i told you to stop eating ice cream, god damn it!” sebastian screams, hands darting forward to grab the pint from her.
“hey, it’s the lactose intolerant one!” she shrieks, running to hide behind mick. the pint pokes out of the side towards logan. “want some?”
logan nods, taking the pint from her. “yeah, sure.”
“wait,” oscar speaks up, waving his arms in the air. “seriously, who is rocky?”
“this dumb ass,” sebastian scoffs, gesturing at the girl now eating her ice cream again. “all she ever eats is rocky road! hence, rocky! breakfast is rocky road, lunch is rocky road—”
“dinner is rocky road,” she mocks, stabbing her spoon into her pint. “it’s okay that i’m eating this because mick got me the no milk version!”
“that doesn’t even make sense! chocolate has milk in it! so does ice cream! do you know what ice cream is made out of?”
mick sighs. “she wouldn’t stop bugging me for ice cream, okay?”
logan laughs, throwing his head back. he clasps his hands together, “tomorrow we’ll teach you how to say ‘no’ to rocky. it took us a long time to figure it out too.”
“really? that’s just what everyone is gonna call me now?” she tilts her head, shoving a spoonful of ice cream into her mouth. “we spend our whole lives without giving me a nickname and seb just comes along and calls me ‘rocky’ and everyone is just gonna ride along with that?”
“yeah, you can say that,” oscar nods with a smile. “it’s fitting, anyway. you would die for rocky road ice cream… right?”
“fair argument.”
“max,” oscar whispers. “have you seen rocky?”
max raises an eyebrow, pausing his conversation with charles. he tilts his head. “yeah, she’s in my garage.”
oscar throws his head back, blinking blankly at the older driver. “what would rocky be doing in your garage?”
“what do you mean? she’s part of my team,” max trails off in confusion, lips pursed in confusion. he glances at charles next to him, who simply shrugs and looks at oscar as well.
“no, she’s not. what business would she have being in your garage?” oscar raises an eyebrow. “unless you guys are scouting her for the future?”
“what? we’ve had rocky on the team for months.”
“she wouldn’t do that. she doesn’t like red bull.”
“red bull literally created her.”
“no they didn’t.”
charles furrows his eyebrows, looking between both of them. “see, i don’t think you guys are talking about the same thing.”
max points at oscar. “what are you talking about?”
“who are you talking about?”
“my race car? her name is rocky.”
oscar’s frustration slowly washes away as realisation dawns over him. he’d completely forgotten that max named his car. he laughs slightly. “right! sorry, mate. i was talking about (y/n),” he explains. “rocky.”
max raises an eyebrow. “who passed the bill to call her that?”
“seb.”
“oh, seb is good with nicknames!” charles beams, patting oscar’s shoulder. he presses his lips together. “why rocky though? that doesn’t really…”
“she eats a lot of rocky road ice cream,” oscar smiles. “therefore, the nickname.”
max frowns. “she’s got the same name as my car… that’s not… that will be confusing.”
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#logan sargeant x reader#sebastian vettel x reader#max verstappen x reader#mick schumacher x reader#oscar piastri x reader#fem!driver#female driver#f1 fem!driver#f1 female driver#vettel reincarnate#disneyprincemuke#disneyprincemuke imagine#disneyprincemuke imagines#disneyprincemuke f1#disneyprincemuke vr#formula 1 x reader#f1 x reader#f1 grid x reader
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I am so conflicted
#I had a therapy appointment today and kind of vaguely told her what happened between me and my friend#without letting her know that I feel like my life is empty without him and all that because I’m crazier than she knows#and she told me that if I was uncomfortable I had every right to express that#and I told her that I was really shitty with how I expressed it and so she asked if I had apologized for that and I have and then she said#like yeah I could’ve done it better but my feelings matter and I was uncomfortable so I shouldn’t feel too guilty for lashing out#she compared it to breaking up a fight like there’s lots of ways to do it and sure it could be broken up in a bad way but what matters is#that someone broke it up#and she also like asked what I would do if I was on the other side of the situation#but I’m just conflicted because I don’t like that my fp could be in the wrong I don’t like that#I love my therapist and I know she’s the expert and she’s a damn good therapist but just#he can’t be in the wrong I’m the one that hurt him I’ve done this so often and I told her that and she asked if I had been uncomfortable in#those past situations and like sometimes yeah and sometimes I’m just in a bad headspace and probably self sabotaging but I just idk I can’t#fathom me not being in the wrong here but deep down I know she’s right that he really should be wanting to evalute what made me uncomfortabl#and like try to make things better but I feel like I’ve made him feel like I just don’t care about him or something which is so far from tru#like not knowing if he’s okay right now is tearing me apart and my other friend also stopped talking to me but those two are dating so thats#probably why I knew if one stopped being my friend the other would follow so I only have one friend again I guess but tbh I shouldn’t have#any if I’m just going to do this kind of shit over and over#I also slightly feel set up and that’s the paranoia talking because I tweeted asking how I can be a better friend and clarified that it was#genuine and everything and my three friends told me I was a good friend#and just apparently not and I know it wasn’t a set up but paranoia and stuff says it was and hhh#everything is just so much and December is coming and my next therapy appointment is on me and my fps friendaversary#but also the day that an idol of mine died so that’s so cool#December is the worst month
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𝐄𝐍𝐇𝐘𝐏𝐄𝐍 𝐀𝐑𝐆𝐔𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐖𝐈𝐓𝐇 𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐈𝐑 𝐒/𝐎
part 2
genre: angst, established relationship
word count: 2.9k
warnings: curse words (and some of the boys are really cruel to yn :()
masterlist
LEE HEESEUNG
"Please, can we talk about this tomorrow?" Heeseung groans as he slumps down on the couch, rubbing his face with his hands. He really doesn't want to get mad at you at such late hour but he can't help it when you keep talking his ear off from the moment that he's walked into your shared apartment. "I'm dead tired, just let it go for now, okay?"
"I'm not sleeping with you today," you scoff, not even daring a look at him so that he doesn't notice the tears of frustration that have started brimming in your eyes.
You've just found out from one of Heeseung's friends that he's been out with his ex for almost the entire day. Without telling you a word about it. Normally, you weren't the jealous type as you trust your boyfriend with your whole heart. But after hearing that he's been having the time of his life with the girl that once has broken his heart, while you were at home waiting for him to come back, your thoughts drifted onto a completely different track.
"Why? Fuck, so what if I saw her today?' He exclaims, slapping his thighs with a breathless laugh. "Nothing happened! She just wanted to talk, YN! Talk. Stop trying to turn it into something that it's not."
"Then why didn't you even bother telling me that you were meeting her?" You ask, involuntarily letting yourself get emotional and raising your voice as well. "Who even does shit like that?"
"I just didn't think it would matter so much to you, that's all. I thought you trusted me a little more!"
"So you're saying that if I were to hang out with my ex and didn't tell you anything about it, you'd be fine with it?" You snort when he nods his head. "Alright, yeah. Watch out cause I almost believed you."
"God, you're just like her! Why would I ever think of cheating on you with her when the two of you are exactly alike?" Heeseung ignores the hurt look on your face and keeps on talking nonsense, fueled up by anger. "Both have trust issues. Both are ridiculously jealous. Both are way too clingy for anybody to bear. Fucking twins!"
You laugh in disbelief as you stand up from the couch. "Why are we even in this relationship if I'm so fucking unlovable to you?"
"Good question," he quietly murmurs.
You don't bother to wait for his apology or pleads for you to stay as you know he's way too deep in his anger to even start acknowledging your feelings now. You don't even have the strength to slam the door, so you just quietly let them shut behind you as you walk out on the dark street.
PARK JAY
You cross your arms over your chest, watching as your boyfriend finishes getting dressed for work. He said he would take the day off today but he obviously forgot to do so and now is leaving you hanging onto another empty promise.
"You're twisting my words! I just said you promised you would stay with me today, that's all."
"Well and I said I forgot! End of story," Jay grumbles at you, dismissing you with a wave of his hand. "Whatever, I don't have time for this right now."
"You never do!" You raise your voice involuntarily and turn your face away as you feel the tears gathering in your eyes. How could he forget? "Not even once have I ever been prioritized while being in this relationship with you! And it's not like you even have anything important to do today!"
"We're not having this conversation again," he laughs breathlessly, threading his fingers through his hair. "My boss called me and said he needs my help. Of course my job is gonna come first in a situation like that, YN! After all this time, I thought you'd be more understanding by now."
"Yeah, it's just there are days where I want to be put first for a change. It's not like I ask you for that every week!"
You can't help but let the tears drop down your cheeks, failing to hide your emotions for any longer. You're right, though. Jay knows it too. You never complained about his work or asked him to take the day off, unless the date was important to you. It's just too bad he was too much in his own head to think about it for a little longer.
"I can always take the day off next week!" Jay says with a roll of his eyes. "And, god, why do you always have to cry?"
"Because it's my fucking birthday, you asshole," you breathe out in a broken voice before standing up from the bed.
Jay's eyes almost double in their size as he lets your words repeat in his mind. Birthday. It's your birthday. He tries to grab your wrist as you walk past him but you jerk it away from him.
"YN, I-"
"I don't wanna talk to you right now."
You rush out of the bedroom. Slamming the bathroom door behind you, you slide to the ground and bury your head in your hands, finally letting out the sob that's been weighting on your throat throughout the entire morning.
SIM JAKE
As you walk out of the restaurant angrily, you dial Jake's number. It's the fourth time you've been stood up by him like that, sitting completely embarrassed and alone at the table reserved for two. Jake was supposed to meet you here forty minutes ago and while at first you waited patiently for him, knowing his schedule is rather tight, after half and hour of having your calls not answered, you started losing your cool.
"Hi, baby. What's up?" You hear his cheerful voice from the other side of the phone.
"Nothing much besides the fact that I've been stood up by my boyfriend once again this week," you reply in a rather passive aggressive manner as you open the door of your car. "How was your day, babe?"
Jake keeps silent for a second or two before a groan leaves his throat. "Fuck, it completely slipped out my mind. I'm sorry."
"Yeah, you should be," you nearly growl, starting your car. You curse quietly when the engine stutters and chokes but doesn't want to start by the first two times. "I waited forty minutes for you, jackass."
"Shit, are you still there? Just wait a little more and I'll be there soon, I promise."
You scoff loudly. "You've got some nerve, I'll give you that, Jake."
You can hear him sigh heavily and you can just picture how he's pinching the bridge of his nose at the moment. "Can you stop that? I already apologized. I'm sorry that I have to work."
"Oh, you're very welcome." You grit your teeth, keeping your phone pressed between your ear and shoulder as you drive out of the parking lot. "Would it really kill you to remember about me even once?"
"YN, you're not being fair right now," he says and you know he's pushing himself to his limits to not raise his voice at you. "Look, one of us has to actually make some money. I can't keep my head wrapped around everything."
"Oh, yeah? So you're at work right now?"
He stutters slightly. Got him. "Well, no I-"
"Jake, are you coming, man?"
Hearing Heeseung's voice shouting on the other line makes your fingers clench on the wheel tightly. You breathe in sharply and let out a short laugh. "Good to know what your priorities are, Jake."
"No, wait, I'm-"
You interrupt him again before ending the call, "Don't bother."
PARK SUNGHOON
You breathe out in relief when you hear the familiar sound of Sunghoon's car pulling up on the driveway. He hasn't been answering any of your calls since the afternoon and you really started getting worried. You've been arguing with each other throughout the couple past weeks and you took notice of how distanced he's become towards you. You've attempted to fix that but it's a really hard task to do with your boyfriend being as stubborn as he is.
"Oh my god, I was so worried about you," you say the second when Sunghoon walks into your house. "Where have you been?"
He only nods his head at you in acknowledgement and toes his shoes off wordlessly. You frown slightly at his sudden muteness and put the sizzling pan aside.
"I made you dinner, figured you'd be hungry," you start again and only get disappointed when he dismisses you curtly.
"I'm not."
Pressing your lips together, you nod your head slightly before following him to the living room and taking a seat next to him, not close enough to irk him any further though. The two of you sit in silence, mindlessly watching the random channel that Sunghoon played. He has his arms folded on his chest and you wonder what went so wrong that he suddenly turned so cold towards you.
So you try again, speaking with a soft voice. "Why didn't you answer my calls today?"
You feel your whole body tensing when he lets out a groan. "Cause I didn't want you distracting me."
"Okay, what the hell is up with you, Hoon? Why the attitude?" You ask, turning away from the TV screen to look at your boyfriend's frowned up face.
You don't miss the roll of his eyes as he clicks his tongue. "For fuck's sake, if I knew you'd be this needy today, I would've stayed out longer."
You try not to show how much his words hurt you but the look on your face tells him a completely different story. You clear your throat and decide on voicing the thought that's made itself way too comfortable in your mind during the past few weeks. "Sometimes I just feel like you don't love me anymore."
"Well, maybe I would've loved you a little more if you stopped being so clingy. Seriously, fifteen calls, YN! Who the hell does that?"
Silence. His hurtful words linger in the air heavily and you both say nothing. You avoid his eyes, lips slightly trembling from the heartbreak. Sunghoon still says nothing as you stand up from the couch and leave the room in a rush.
KIM SUNOO
"Do you even hear yourself? Why would she be lying?" Sunoo shouts at you as he crosses his arms defensively.
You're gripping the edge of your sleeve tightly, trying to prevent yourself from raising your voice as well. Even though you're keeping cool, his words and accusations stab your heart with dozens of needles. Having your boyfriend believing his friend rather than you has got to be one of the worst feelings in the world.
"And why would I be lying?" You ask, glaring him down. "Why would I, your girlfriend, lie about my whereabouts? For fun?"
He scoffs at you,. "Well, you didn't tell me you were hanging out with Sunghoon, did you?"
"No, because I wasn't hanging out with him, we just stumbled upon each other on my way back," you explain calmly as you clench your sleeve even tighter from frustration. "We literally talked for five minutes."
"That's not what what I've heard."
You roll your eyes at his stubbornness. "Yeah, cause what else would a person that's been in love with you for two years tell you?" You can't really help the sarcastic tone that's sneaked itself into your speech and you can see it only irks Sunoo more as he nearly scowls at you.
But all that you've said is the truth. Since the beginning of your relationship, you've noticed his best friend's spiteful looks thrown your way along with the heart-eyes directed at Sunoo. You've kept quiet for all this time, not saying a word even when he ditched you for her or made plans without your knowing. But this, this is just too much for you.
"You don't know what you're talking about," he has the audacity to laugh at you.
"No, Sunoo, it hurts me, you know?" You finally let all of your feelings that have been crumpled inside you for all these years. "Do you ever even try to acknowledge my feelings when you hang out with her?"
"Don't turn this on me right now. And I'm not allowed to have female friends now? What kind of a girlfriend even are you?"
You get up from his bed and scoff at him. "And what kind of a boyfriend accuses his girlfriend of cheating while he sneaks out without her knowledge to meet up with his best friend?"
With that, you turn on your heel and leave his apartment, slamming the door behind you.
YANG JUNGWON
"That's not what friends do, YN! Are you even listening to me?"
"I am but you're being ridiculous!" You bite back at your boyfriend, walking back from a lunch with your best friend.
Throughout the entire meal she's been throwing jabs and snarly remarks at you, and although you've already grown used to her attitude, Jungwon just couldn't let that slide. He thinks it's illogical that someone you've been calling your friend for such a long time, would act so mean and nearly insulting towards you.
"I don't understand how can you let her speak to you that way," he breathes out in disbelief. "I wanted to spit in her face after an hour of talking to her, why do you let her do this to you all the time?"
"Because she's my best friend, Won!" You try to stay your ground as you dig into your purse, looking for your keys. "That's just how she is. I've learnt not to take any offence in that. You shouldn't either."
"I just care about you, so forgive me for not liking it when someone insults my girlfriend!"
You sigh, feeling tired from the night and the ongoing argument. "I know you do but I don't see it that way. She's just rough around the edges, that's all."
"Of course you don't see it. All you need is constant validation. You just can't live with the thought of somebody not liking you. You'd let a stranger walk all over you only if it meant you had gotten his approval. That's not fucking healthy, YN!"
"How can you even say that to me? Why would you-," you stop yourself from engaging in this conversation and slump your shoulders with resignation. "I don't wanna do this anymore."
Jungwon sends you a confused look. "What do you mean?"
"I just want to be alone right now," you say and Jungwon can clearly hear the exhaustion in your tone. "I'll see you tomorrow. Thanks for walking me back."
NISHIMURA RIKI
The moment that you hear the door slamming, you sigh as you realize it's one of these days again. For the past week or so, Niki has been coming home frustrated beyond words but not even once has he said what was bothering him. Sure, you've tried to intervene and ask him what's was it all about but he always dismissed you quickly. It hurts you to think that maybe he doesn't trust you enough to confide in you like that.
"Hi," you greet him as you stand up from the couch. You walk over to your boyfriend and wrap your arms around his neck in an attempt of hugging him but only get disappointed when you feel his body tense up. You pull away and look at him pointedly. "Another bad day?"
Niki hums and moves away from you, going into the direction of the kitchen. You follow him, feeling worried for him as you know he has the tendencies of bottling up his emotions inside.
"Wait! Don't ignore me again," you scolded him slightly, forcing yourself to stay calm and speak with the soft tone. You grab him by his forearm. "Niki?"
"Let go of me," he breathes out, voice heavy and your heart screams at the thought of him deciding to struggle with all of it by himself again.
You do as he asks and free his arm instantly. "Okay. Just talk to me, please?"
"There's nothing to talk about, Yn!" He snaps at you and runs his hand through his hair. "Stop pressing me!"
"No, you always keep acting like everything's fine when it's clearly not! I don't want you to keep it all to yourself. I want you to feel like you can talk to me about stuff like that," you explain, trying to keep him on your side. "I want to help you!"
"I don't need your help, though!" He scowls, sending you a sharp look. "If I knew you'd be sticking your nose into my business the second I walked through the door, I wouldn't even bother coming back."
"Hey, that's so cruel and uncalled for, Niki," you gasp slightly, feeling his words pulling at your heart again. "You're my boyfriend, of course I care about you! I hate seeing you like that but you just won't let me understand what's going on with you!"
"Are you my psychiatrist or my girlfriend? Jesus, I'm not in the mood for that right now," he sighs heavily and walks past you straight for the door.
"No, wait!" You call after him but you're too late and he's already slamming the door behind his back.
permanent taglist: @bambisgirl @arizejkt19
#i dont think id forgive all of them so easily in the real life lmao#hoon especially yeah i kinda went off with that one im sorry#enhypen#enhypen imagines#enhypen x reader#enhypen reactions#enhypen reaction#enhypen angst
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Light The Flame
mbf! Joel Miller x F! Reader
Part 2
Synopsis: Your mom moves the two of you back to Texas and attempts to reignite an old flame. What will happen when she learns his candle now burns for you?
Genre: fluff, angst, and smut! the trifecta!
Warnings: divorced parents, mentions of cheating, no Sarah, no outbreak, drinking, age gap (reader is said to be in college but Joel's exact age isn't stated), Tommy is a bit of a sleaze, kissing, 18+ content, p in v sex, protected sex!, lots of different sexual acts, cursing
Gif credits to owners!
Inspired by this post from @deathsholywaterr ! I hope I did your idea justice!!
Also this shit is long so buckle up!
It had been about three months since your parents' divorce was officially finalized. Your dad had moved out long ago and with no other ties keeping her in California, she decided to move back to her hometown in Texas. And although you would miss your friends and the life you had in LA, you couldn't shake the feeling that you needed (and deserved) a change. Plus, you had just found out your boyfriend was sleeping with your so called best friend. So, yeah, you wanted to get out as soon as possible.
All of your stuff was packed into a moving van and moved across the United States. You knew Texas would be super different, but a welcome change. Not to mention a chance to reinvent yourself. Taking college classes and finding your path in life, that was the goal. But, of course, a girl still needs to have a bit of fun and you and you had heard Texas nightlife was very fun!
That's how you found yourself, perched on a barstool, at a downtown Austin bar, listening to drunk people sing karaoke only hours after unpacking your clothes. You giggled lightly to yourself as a very drunk man hit a way too high note. Rotating the barstool around to place your now empty glass on the counter and just as you were about to motion the bar tender over to order another a man settled in next to you. He leaned against the counter, a bit closer to you than you would've liked.
"Hello gorgeous, how 'bout you let me get you a drink?" His words slurred together as the smell of the beer on his breath wafted towards you. Your nose scrunched in disgust.
"How about no?" Your tone was sweet, but your words were not as you batted your eyelashes at the man. He was cute, but you weren't exactly in the mood for flirting especially with someone as intoxicated as him.
"Come on, one drink. We don't even gotta have a conversation, just wanna know your name. I'm Tommy by the way." He held out his hand, with how close he was it almost hit you in the face. You recoiled.
That's when a different man appeared next to the two of you, he grabbed Tommy by the bicep and yanked his hand back. Then pulled his body a few feet away from you, finally giving you the space you had been wanting the whole time.
"I'm sorry about him, sugar. My brother is an idiot and I'm an idiot for thinking he'd be okay alone for five minutes." He turns to Tommy. "Can't even let me pee, without causing me problems, can you?"
Trying to hold back your smile, you flattened out your skirt, getting rid of the imaginary wrinkles in it. The brother's eyes lock onto your hands, seemingly just now taking you in. He gulps as his eyes glaze over, then clears his throat.
"I really am sorry about him. Here, let me buy you a drink." He says and you almost giggle at how badly the two brothers want to buy you alcohol.
"Don't worry about it! Sadly, I am used to drunk men coming up to me. I appreciate it though, but honestly I should get home." He looks lost in thought, like he's debating offering to drive you home. But just as he opens his mouth Tommy slips and falls, almost taking his brother down with him. Then, who you're assuming is the older one tries to get him back to his feet.
He continues to struggle to get Tommy up, as you stand from your seat after placing a few dollars onto the bar for tip. Tommy drops to the floor again and he sighs. Ruffling through his pocket he pulls out his card and hands it to you.
With a quick, "If you ever want that drink." Before getting Tommy to his feet and pushing him back to where they must have been sitting. You glance at the card wanting to know his name.
Joel
A few days later, you found yourself at the grocery store. You wandered aimlessly through the aisles. Half in an attempt to orientate yourself with the new areas and half just looking for what sounded good. You wanted snacks, just weren't sure what exactly. As you pushed your now pretty full cart down the wine aisle, you saw a familiar face at the other end.
You tracked him with your eyes for a second before his met yours. A smile graced his lips, eyebrows raising in surprise. Honestly you were surprised yourself. Not only did he recognize you, but he was happy to see you.
Making his way towards you, he offered you a small wave, which you returned. Your cheeks heated up slightly, you remembered he was attractive, but now in the bright florescence it showed even more. Glancing down at your outfit, you cursed yourself for not putting in just a bit more effort this morning.
"Hello again." Joel said when he finally made it over to you.
"Hello again," You mirrored his words, "Wasn't sure you would recognize me just now." You cursed yourself at the words you let slip out. Insecurities on full display.
"Of course I would recognize that beautiful face again." He says nonchalantly, like he didn't just openly call you beautiful. Like he didn't just openly flirt with you!
Cheeks flushed, you cleared your throat, "Did...uh...did you and Tommy get home alright?" He smiles like you've said something funny.
"We did, you?" Awkwardly, you shift your weight.
"I did."
He looks at you with the same smile from before, something mischievous now playing in his eyes. Cocking his head at you, he looks like he is trying to get you to say more.
"You never called, don't want that drink, sugar?" Now you are adorning a playful look back. He was scared you weren't going to call him?
"I was getting to it." You say, simply. Not wanting to come off too desperate, but also not letting his hopes get dashed.
"I was really looking forward to seeing you again." Joel takes a step closer to you.
"I might be at the bar sometime this weekend, maybe you will." At your words his eyes darken slightly. He knows you are toying with him.
Taking one more step towards you he leans down, his lips ghosting the shell of your ear, "Maybe I will." And he's trying to play back. He smirks at you before offering you another wave and walking off into the depths of the store.
You are left there, blinking and blushing at his retreating figure.
That weekend, you were doing your makeup oh so precisely. The dress you had picked out hugged your figure perfectly. You wore your best heels. Your hair was meticulous. Now to just hope Joel showed.
It's not like the two of you picked a specific day or time so what if he wasn't there? You couldn't think like that, you could only hope for the best and look your best too.
As you pushed open the door of the same bar you had first met Joel at the cool air washed over you, causing you to shiver. That's when your eyes met with his. It was almost like he had his eyes trained onto the door, just waiting for you to arrive. It looked like he chuckled at your shiver as he stood and made his way over to you.
"Cold princess?" His head cocked at you in amusement.
You crossed your arms, "Actually I'm just fine." And with a nod you saunter past him and towards the bar to order a drink.
He follows closely behind him and you just know he's smirking at your response. Joel lets you attempt, and fail, to gain the bartenders attention. Before he places a hand lightly on your shoulder and nods as if to say "watch this".
Bringing his fingers to his lips he blows out a loud whistle, your eyes widen in shock. He smirks down at you before making eye contact with the bar tender who is now staring incredulously at Joel.
"Joe, think you can get my girl here a drink?" My girl? He didn't mean it like that, he couldn't have.
"Only since she's so pretty. But you? I've told you about doing that, Miller. So annoying." The bartender, Joe, mumbles the last part more to himself but both you and Joel hear it. Joel laughs behind you, you feel the rumble of his chest against your back. A shiver runs down your spine.
He leans down, talking into your ear, "Sure you aren't cold?"
You roll your eyes, he knows what he's doing. Actually, he's doing it on purpose. Letting out a scoff, you readjust your position on the stool allowing your body to graze against Joel's a bit more. His hand reaches out to grip the edge of the bar. You can feel his eyes boring into you, his knuckles are turning white. Yep, you know what you're doing as well.
And just as Joel was about to say something else to you, Joe comes back with two drinks in hand. He passes a smaller glass to Joel, with what you assume is scotch in it. Then he passes a taller glass with a mixed drink in it to you. Its the same drink you got the other night you came in and you wonder how Joe remembered. But you brush it off as good customer service and take a sip of your fruity drink.
Joel smirks down at you as you are obviously enjoying your drink ad sips his as well. The ice clinks in his glass when he sits down the half empty vessel next to you.
Once again, he speaks into your ear, "Why don't we find a booth?" Nodding in response, he holds his hand out to you to help you off of the stool. You can't help the blush that rises to your cheeks at how much of a gentleman he is.
The two of you sat and talked for hours. Subtle flirts, learning about each other, anything and everything. Although you weren't sure you were ready for a relationship after the train wreck that was your last one, you enjoyed Joel's company and it seemed like he enjoyed yours. Plus, it didn't hurt to just have a strictly physical relationship, did it?
Thats how you found yourself agreeing to another date with Joel. Thats how you found yourself moving your hips into his on the dance floor. And thats how you found yourself in his bed later that night.
Currently he was sitting on the edge of the bed, your legs straddling his as you kissed fervently. Your hips moved seemingly on their own, grinding your clothed core down onto his jean clad member. He groans into your mouth when you grind down even rougher. Big hands grip onto your hips, stilling your movements.
"Careful princess." His voice is deep as he mutters into your lips before catching them in a deep kiss again. This causes you to now let out a moan. Damnit if you weren't the most turned on you've ever been.
Joel seems to catch onto the faster movements of your hips, knowing you need more. His lips trial down your neck to the juncture of your shoulder, he bits you lightly before licking over the marks. You gasp, bucking your hips forward at the feeling. He smirks against your skin and moves his lips down your exposed chest. Silently thanking yourself for wearing such a low cut top.
Lips ghost against the skin of your breast before he pulls your shirt aside to let one boob out of its constraints. He sucks your nipple into his mouth and that's when you fully loose yourself into the pleasure. If you weren't fucked before, you sure were now. Well...you were going to be soon hopefully.
Pulling off of your bud, his breath fans over the sensitive skin causing a shiver to run down your spine. Something flashes in his eyes as a smirk graces his lips.
"Either you're always cold or I really have an effect on you." He says, craning his neck back towards your lips. You roll your eyes before he's meeting lips with your own and flipping you over to lay on the bed.
Your head lands all but gracefully on the plush surface, his lips never leaving yours. The hands that were on your hips, now explored your body leaving goosebumps in their wake. One massaged your still covered breast, the other slowly made its way up the inside of your thigh. His fingers tentatively crossed over your core and up to the buttons of your pants. Your need to have him inside of you grew stronger as you lifted your hips involuntarily, trying to urge him to take of your pants.
"So desperate." Is all Joel says before he is popping open the first button. Then the next. Then the next. Slowly he unbuttons them all and pulls your pants just as slowly down your legs. The pace makes you whimper out.
He was right, you were desperate. But with how slow he was going, who wouldn't be?
"I want to taste that pretty pussy." Joel says as he finally makes eye contact with your lacy underwear.
"Please, I just want you inside me." He gives you a look at your words, like he wasn't sure you meant it. Or he wasn't sure you were that ready?
"Next time, please Joel just fuck me already."
He seems to contemplate this for a second, but ultimately agrees, "Your wish is my command."
He slips out of his own shirt and quickly slides his jeans off too. Standing there in just his underwear, you swear you could pass out from the view alone. But your head was too cloudy to say anything. Joel seemed to see the lust in your eyes and just shook his head before grabbing a condom from the nightstand.
"Take your shirt off for me, sugar." Its a bit more of a request than a command but you follow it like it was an order. You had to admit it was a bit sexy to be told what to do.
"Good girl, let me see how wet you are." He stands over you while stroking his hardening dick through his underwear. You watch in awe before following his instructions and pull your own panties off of you.
Spreading your legs, you display your pussy to him and he groans at the sight. He strokes himself a bit faster as you slide your fingers through your soaked folds. Fingers dip into your opening and you hold back your reaction, keeping your eyes locked onto his. When your fingers are thoroughly coated in your juice, you trail them up your torso to your mouth. Sucking your fingers in and licking them clean.
Darkness fills Joel's eyes as he decides this is the last straw and he is on top of you in a instant. Pulling your fingers out of your mouth he shoves them into his own, swirling his tongue around your digits.
Quickly he pushes off of you just to take off his underwear and slip the condom onto his painfully hard penis. You gulp at the sight, mouth watering like you've been in a desert for days. You make a note that next time you must also taste him.
But, these thoughts leave your head as quickly as they came because Joel is pushing his member into you. As the tip breaches your entrance, you are gasping and gripping onto his arms for support. You feel his muscles tensing under your fingertips as he begrudgingly paces himself, trying to let you adjust
You almost giggle at the pained look on his face. Wrapping your legs around his waist, you hook your ankles together and pull him the rest of the way inside of you. He has to catch himself from falling on top of you from both a mixture of shock and the forceful nature of your movement.
Eyes meet yours with a shocked look. You just give him a smirk and a shrug in return. Regaining his composure, he pulls out of almost completely. So painfully slowly that you almost keel over. You know its your punishment for what you had done and you were feeling the full force of your actions.
But, the punishing doesn't last long as he enters you again. He thrusts out to his tip again only quicker and rougher. Continuing this action of thrusting in and out of you picking up a tempo.
After letting out another moan when he slams into you particularly hard, you crane you neck slightly to see the look on his face. He seems to have fully lost himself in the pleasure. The teasing is all lost and he is now fully focused on getting you both to your orgasms.
Joel is now fucking into you with no more reservations. He reaches a hand between the two of you, using his thumb to rub your clit. He rubs the bud in circles, trying to work you towards your peak.
"Cum for me, princess." He says with a grunt, gripping your hips roughly. His hips snap into yours roughly.
You feel the beginnings of your orgasm. The coil in your stomach begins to tighten. Your hips buck up at the feeling, needing to orgasm.
"Joel!" You gasp out as you are pushed over the edge. You clench around his cock, pussy urging him to cum as well.
Working you through your orgasm, he continues his motions on your clit. He thrusts are getting a bit out of rhythm as he is also reaching his own peak. Leaning over you he reattaches his lips to yours, pushing his tongue into your mouth.
As his hips stutter into yours he is thrusting into you one last time before spilling his load into the condom. Joel moans into your mouth as he works himself through his orgasm. Hips slow down as his orgasm ends and Joel is plopping down next to you. Wrapping you in his arms as his member is still inside of you.
All that is heard in the room is heavy breathing for a minute as Joel's sweaty body surrounds yours. You look up at him and his eyes meet yours. A smile graces his lips before he is pecking your nose and bringing you even closer to him.
Eventually, he pulls out of you and ties of the condom. Moving to toss it in the en suite before returning just to wrap you back into his warm embrace.
After the first time you and Joel hooked up, the two of you hung out at least three times a week. You would go to the bar, get a few drinks, talk a bit, laugh a bit. But you would always end up back at Joel's place. In his bed. In his arms.
Your mom was also starting to catch onto something going on with you. With you coming home late, giggling on your phone, smiling randomly at the thought of Joel. Not to mention, you were acting a bit shady. Even your friend noticed a change when she called you the other day.
But it was nothing but physical, right? Right...
Pushing open the door as silently as you could, you slightly stumbled into the dark house. Still a little tipsy as well as a bit of jelly legs from your earlier activities. Slipping off your shoes and picking them up so your heels wouldn't echo, you tried to reach the stairs to your room.
The minute your hand grabbed the banister, the lights in the living room flipped on like some movie scene. Your mom sat on the couch, arms crossed staring at you.
Jumping you tried to calmly greet her, "Hey mom."
"Don't 'hey mom' me, where have you been?" She was never this serious, so it scared you slightly.
"Out, I found a bar in town and I've been hanging out there." You didn't want to mention Joel just yet. One because how did you explain to your mom that you had a fuck buddy. And two that that fuck buddy was almost twice your age.
"By yourself?" Shit, she saw right through you.
"I mean, I talk to a few people there. Made friends with the bar tender. Well sort of, he's a bit serious and-"
She held up her hand to stop your rambling. You snapped your mouth shut.
"Who drove you home?" Joel had been driving you home from his house almost every time you guys hung out. He didn't like you taking a taxi that late.
You gulped, "I got a taxi."
"I know that's not true, Y/N. You're seeing someone. I can tell. You're different since we moved here and I think it has to do with someone." Your eyebrows furrow at her confession. Was she mad at you for staying out or mad at you for keeping secrets from her?
"Okay, maybe I am. I'm an adult!" You really weren't sure what she wanted to hear at this moment.
"You are, but I just want to make sure you are responsible."
Now you were rolling your eyes and crossing your arms back at her.
"Responsible? I can assure you I am." What did she think? That you were going around sleeping with randos and not using protection?
"Good," She stood up now and made her way over to you, "I just want to make sure you're okay, sweetie. After all that happened before..." She trailed off when she saw the hurt on your face at the mention of your ex.
She continued, "Anyways, I can see you're happy, so I won't pester you much about it anymore. But, can you at least try to come home earlier. You know I worry." She places a kiss on your forehead and moves past you up the stairs a bit, only turning back to hear your reply.
"I will, I'm sorry you were worried." You smile at her, she returns that smile.
Making her way to her room she shouts back one more thing before closing herself in her room, "And I wanna meet him sometime!"
This has you gulping, breathing cut short, body rigid. How were you going to get out of this one?
The next morning as you sluggishly made your way to the kitchen, you were greeted by your overly excited mother.
"Morning sweetie!" You almost cringe at her loud voice, feeling the effects of your late night.
"Morning." You grumble out, before making your way to the pantry to find something to eat.
She's humming to herself as she cooks some eggs on the stove. At first you don't think much of it, until you notice her almost bouncing on the balls of her feet. It makes you take a pause, she was excited about something and she definitely wanted to tell you about it.
"Why are you so happy?" You ask with a smile in your voice. Leaning against the pantry door, you make eye contact with her. She blushes, smiles, and then looks back down at her eggs.
"Remember how I told you I went out with a group of friends from high school the other night?" You nod recalling how she animatedly told you about that night and all the nostalgia.
"Well, we are all hanging out again tonight. I'm just excited." Now you nod in acknowledgement. But she did seem a bit more excited than just a hang out, eh whatever.
You went back to looking for your cereal, grabbing it and a bowl. While pouring your cereal into your bowl, your mom speaks again.
"Plus, I might have a man too." Jumping slightly at her confession, you almost spill your cereal. You weren't sure you were ready for her to date again. It seemed weird after your parents had just divorced. You'd never seen either of them with anyone else, just strange.
She continues without you saying anything, "We went to school together. Used to have a bit of crush on him back then, but never worked out. Anyway, he was with us that other night and when I tell you he aged well!"
Almost laughing at how your mom was acting like one of your friends. Cute little crush and everything! You still felt a bit weird about hearing something like this from her. First of all, ew! Second of all, was she ready?
"Oh, that's nice." Is all you can manage to say, before taking a bite of your cereal, that you had just finished pouring milk into.
"'That's nice.'" She repeats, setting her spatula down and not making eye contact with you.
"Yeah, mom, that's nice. It will be nice for you, after dad..." You trail off, not sure if this is a sore subject or not. The two of you didn't talk much about the divorce anymore. So you thought it better to tread lightly.
"I think so too." She says, a bit more happier now as she resumes her eggs.
Yep, it will be nice.
After your awkward breakfast with your mom, you returned to your room to text Joel. If your mom was going out, you might as well too, right?
A few minutes later, your phone buzzed with a message. Quickly dropping whatever you were previously doing you crashed down onto your stomach on your bed. Kicking your feet as you unlocked your phone to read the message.
Joel: Sorry, sugar but I have plans tonight. Tomorrow?
You sigh, guess everyone was busy tonight.
You: No worries! See you tomorrow!
Sighing, you flipped onto your back, staring at your ceiling trying to think of what was going to keep you occupied tonight.
You decided to take the time for a self care night. Painted your nails, did a face mask, read a bit, before ultimately ending up in the bath.
The soak felt nice and after weeks of not focusing on yourself enough, it also felt nice to just relax. Plus, if you were glowing the next time you saw Joel, he probably wouldn't be able to keep his hands off of you.
That's how you found yourself, wrapped up in your soft robe propped up at your vanity. Hair wrapped in a towel while you rubbed lotion into your legs.
Just as you were finishing up, the doorbell rang downstairs. Sighing, not really wanting an interruption, but needing to answer it nonetheless. You pushed up from your seat and made your way downstairs. Not even bothering to change out of your robe.
And you would have never expected what you were about to see on the other side of the door as you swung it open.
There stood Joel and another lady, trying to hold up your very drunk mother. Eye immediately lock onto Joel's, an apologetic look on his face as he wasn't sure what to say.
Your mother however saw you and tried to rush at you to hug you. Slurring about this and that. How much fun she had, how pretty you were, anything and everything that came to her inebriated mind.
Joel and the lady held her back, trying to keep her on her feet and off of you. After the initial shock of the moment, you finally realized they were probably trying to get you to let them inside.
"Oh! Um, come in. I'm sorry about her, uh maybe just put her on the couch?" You gesture towards the living room and move aside to let all three of them through. Joel glances back at you as you close the door, eyes also trained onto him.
They try to place your mother onto the couch as carefully as they can, but she falls to the side anyways. You are almost horrified at the situation. Joel, here. Your mom, drunk. Joel with your drunk mom.
Joel clears his throat while the lady is busying herself with your mom, "As you can see, she's a bit tipsy." He states the obvious, you bite your lip as he shuffles from foot to foot nervously.
"A bit." You conclude.
"Yeah, uh, it might have been my idea to play a drinking game. Sorry!" The lady on the couch calls over her shoulder, returning to your mom.
Your eyes never leave Joel's. As the shock subsides, you finally put some pieces together. Your mom was going to see some high school friends. Joel was one of your mom's high school friends. You were hooking up with your mom's friend. Fuck!
Joel tries to read your face, you can see how he wants to go over to you. Wants to apologize properly or explain himself. Anything to make you feel better.
"Sug-Uh, Y/N right?" He almost lets his pet name for you out. You nod, like he doesn't moan out your name nightly.
"'m Joel and that's Linda." You nod again. What then fuck is happening right now?
"Do you think we should take her upstairs?" The lady, Linda, finally turns to look at you. She scans you and you only just now realize what you are wearing. Or lack of what you are wearing. Eyes shift to Joel, who is seemingly now taking in your appearance as well. You notice his Adam's apple bob a bit as he tries to wet his now very dry mouth.
"I mean, she will probably be fine there. One night on the couch isn't so bad." You try to joke but Linda's face stays stern.
"I'll take her up, can you bring her some water?" She looks to you and you nod again, now gulping at how serious she is.
Linda grabs your mom off the couch and surprisingly easily takes your mom up the stairs.
"The door on the left." You call out, realizing you never told her. Linda grunts in acknowledgement before taking your mom into your room. The second the door closes, Joel speaks.
"Linda's a bit serious."
"A bit serious? I was gonna say scary." He laughs at your statement.
"She is, isn't she?" He laughs again, before stopping as his eyes latch onto yours.
"Baby..." He trails off, not sure what to say.
"So, you're friends with my mom?" He nods. You open your mouth once, twice, before closing it again. Also not sure what to say.
"Obviously, I didn't know until she gave me the address tonight. Then I didn't know what I was going to say to you. I couldn't act like I knew you and-" He stops his rambling as you step towards him, placing a hand on his chest.
"It's okay, I know you didn't know. I know you wouldn't keep something like that from me." His hand engulfs yours, pulling it up to his mouth to peck your palm.
"You're so good to me." Taking a step closer, his forehead rests on yours.
You giggle, "You're so good to me."
The two of you sit there in silence for a second before he speaks again.
"You look so pretty right now, angel. I wish I could kiss you."
"You could." You confirm, bringing your face closer to his.
And right as he is about to attach his lips to yours, something crashes up stairs. you jump back from Joel at the sound before the two of you rush upstairs. Just to find Linda and your mom on the floor, laughing. You sigh in relief before noticing the pile of book knocked off the bookshelf.
"What happened?" You ask.
"She fell while trying to put her pants on. Knocked over all these books and me." Linda replies in between laughs. Only a bit shocked by her switch in emotions, you sign again.
"It's okay, you guys have done enough. I'll put her to bed now and clean that up in the morning. Thank you for everything." Linda nods, stands, and dusts herself off. Before looking to Joel who just gestures for her to go first.
Joel glances back at you once last time. Almost taking a step towards you, before shaking his head and following behind Linda.
The front door closes down stairs and your attention returns to your mom who is still sitting on the floor. Her head is slumped over and her breathing is even, like she has fallen asleep just like that.
"Come on, mom, let's get you to bed." You reach under her arms to lift her up. She doesn't help but falls into another giggling fit. Trying so hard not to laugh to you push her down under her seats, tucking her in just like she used to when you were little.
"That was him." She says all of a sudden.
"That was who?" You reply, not fully listening as you pick up one of the books.
"The guy I was telling you about. The one that grew up well. He's hot right?" You stop mid movement of picking up another book. What?
But before you can even say anything else soft snores come from the bed. You stand up and place the book back onto their shelf. Leaving the room silently.
You lean against the door once you shut it, stomach tying into knots.
The guy your mom is interested in is the guy that you are currently seeing. What the fuck?
The next morning it was your mom's turn to come into the kitchen groaning. Holding her head she sits at one of the barstools at the island.
"Morning sunshine." You greet her with a laugh while sipping your coffee.
She just grunts in response, you laugh again. Turning to make her her own mug of coffee, knowing that's exactly what she wants right now.
You slide it over to her, her eyes widen for only a second before lifting the mug to her lips. As soon as the liquid touches her tongue she is smiling into the brim of it.
"Thank you." She says as she places it back onto the counter. You raise your own mug to her in a "you're welcome" gesture. She sighs.
"Did I embarrass myself last night?" Groaning again while rubbing her temples.
You laugh, "Only a little." Holding up a pinching gesture with the hand not holding your coffee.
You take a sip while your mom speaks again, "Oh! But you met Joel right? What do you think?" And that's when you choke. You were kind of hoping she didn't bring up Joel.
"That bad?" Your mom chuckles while you try to recover from your coughing fit.
"Uh...um he didn't seem too bad." You finally say as you recover just enough to let the words out.
Your mom only nods, taking your short answer as enough.
What were you going to do?
You had sent a text earlier in the day to confirm with Joel that the two of you were still on for tonight. Although, you were a bit confused by the whole situation currently. You knew how you felt about Joel and honestly you were tired of hiding it from not only yourself but also him.
Now you could only hope he felt the same. That hope, however, came fully to fruition when the you showed up to Joe's bar and Joel was standing there waiting for you, bouquet in hand. You almost teared up at the gesture.
When you crossed the bar to him, he wrapped an arm around your waist pulling your body into his. He placed a kiss on the top of your head before handing the flowers to you.
"Sorry again about last night." You hit his chest at his statement. He backs up in shock, mouth wide open. His dramatics make you laugh.
"Stop saying sorry, it isn't your fault. My mom should be apologizing to you!"
"Still I should've at least warned you we were coming." Dramatics dropped as he looks down at his feet.
"While you were driving? Joel Miller!" Now you are the one being overdramatic and it makes him laugh like it had made you laugh.
"Fine, but I still feel bad."
You sigh, "Fine, but you're not sitting in this corner all night! Dance with me!" You grab his hand and pull him onto the dance floor.
When you start dancing he is only swaying his hips a bit, not fully into it. But you aren't having any of that, you grab his arms and slide his hands down your sides. Flipping around so your ass makes contact with his crotch. This seems to make him react as he grabs your hips in almost a warning.
Although, of course, this only eggs you on to continue your teasing. Grinding your hips back into his like that very first night the two of you hooked up. You spin back around, hands moving up his stomach and chest finally resting latched behind his neck. Your head is tossed back as you continue to move your hips dangerously close to his own. Neck is on full display for Joel and he takes this as an opportunity to crane down and place a soft kiss there.
His head now rests on your shoulder using his hands to help move your hips in time with his. You smile, he must be feeling a bit better now. So when he raises his head out of the crook of your neck you raise your own to meet eyes.
But you don't see lust there, you see something else. Love? It makes you gulp, goosebumps raising on your skin as he leans down to bring his lips to yours.
And when he pulls away, "I want you." He says, but it isn't in the lustful way he usually says it. Not sure how to reply, you smirk teasingly.
"Then take me."
"Not like that, baby. I-I want you. I-" Words seem to stop at the top of his throat, fearing that they will topple over.
Still unsure, you say the first thing that comes to mind, "You have me. I've been yours for a while, Joel." The look in his eyes sparks almost unnoticeably.
"You're mine?" You nod. "Promise?" Another nod.
"Come home with me?" Instead of answering, you attach your lips to him.
Waking up in Joel's arms felt so much different than all the times you had been in his bed and in his arms before. Something about the intimacy of your conversation from the night before and the intimacy of being in his bed now. You were just so serene. It felt right. There was no other way to describe it.
Obviously, after leaving Joe's you ended up at Joel's place once again. Although this time you had told your mom so she wouldn't worry and you had also, at Joel's request, told her that you weren't going to come home at all tonight.
Of course, like all the nights before Joel and you had ended up fucking, but last night felt different. It was slower, it was intimate, it was like he was making love to you. If you had asked Joel he would tell you that's exactly what he was doing.
Glancing over at Joel, you see that he is still asleep. You try to carefully let yourself out of grip to get out of bed but his strong arms keep you there.
As you try again, he just grips you tighter letting out a groan. He opens his eyes slowly.
"Don't leave me." He says while still waking up.
"I'm not leaving, Joel, I-" He cuts you off by pulling you roughly into his side.
"Joel-" you warn with a squeak as he pushes on your stomach with the heel of hi hand. "-I need to pee."
He still doesn't let you up. Just nuzzles his face into your hair. His breath tickles your neck.
"If you don't let me go, I'll end up peeing in your bed." You try to warn him again and finally he lets you go with a sigh.
But before you can make it fully into the bathroom he is calling out behind you.
"You're mine?" Your eyes roll.
"Yes."
"Promise?"
"Joel." Another warning tone.
"Promise." This time it wasn't a question.
"I promise. Now let me go pee!"
After peeing, you returned to Joel who was still sprawled out in bed. He brought you back into his arms as quickly as he could. The two of you stayed like that for a while, just bathing it each other's warmth.
Until Joel's hands started wandering. First it started with rubbing soothing circles onto your back. Then the circles moved to your thighs. The circles becoming less soothing and more whimper inducing. Then they moved to just above the waistband of your pants (boxers you had borrowed from Joel). Only for them to dip past that waistband just a second later. Now teasing your already dripping slit.
Whimpering out, Joel caught your sound with his lips. Letting his tongue taste yours. The kiss was slow, passionate. No matter how much he wanted you, he was taking it slow.
His fingers continued teasing your pussy lips, collecting your juices before slipping just the tip of fingers past your folds. Gasping, you bit down on his lip, causing him to groan into your mouth. The shock made him loose himself for a second but he recovered quickly and continued teasing you.
He did this for a minute or two never letting his lips leave yours. Bringing his fingers to your clit he rubbed the bud a few times before slipping his hand out of pants. You whined at the loss.
"I need to be inside of you. Can't wait any longer." He says before pushing you to turn around so he was now behind you.
You heard Joel rustling through his nightstand for a second before tearing open a package. Shifting away from your warmth for only a second to slide his underwear down and slip the condom on.
As quickly as he can he is returning to touching you, hand moving up under your shirt. Lips are on your neck nipping and sucking lightly at the sensitive skin.
The hand in your shirt moves up to tease your boob, massaging both of them. The other hand is moving back to the waistband of your pants, slipping them down your legs as much as he can in the position that you are in. You help him by lifting your hips a bit.
Joel slides his dick into you from behind, it being easy from till being a bit stretched out from last night. Not to mention all the teasing and the amount of wetness that is almost dripping down your thighs at this point.
You don't even need to adjust to the stretch, "Please Joel." You breath out. He continues fucking into behind and kissing at your neck.
Hand is still in your shirt, just holding onto your tit. The other is holding your hip in place, like he thinks you'll slip away from him. He is fully seated inside of you when he slowly pulls out of you to hi tip, before fucking back into all the way to the hilt.
He continues his slow and steady pace, just taking his time with your body. Needing to feel all of you. Needing you.
Thrusting his dick in and out of you. Working both of you towards your release. Morning sex with Joel was definitely different than any of the sex you've ever had with him before but you were loving it. You loved how he was taking his time. He didn't want either of you to get overstimulated.
The hand that was on your hip wrapped around to tease your clit. The strokes were as slow as his thrusts. But he strokes once particularly roughly and you are moaning, turning your head to try and meet lips with Joel. He obliges and connects your lips.
This is what sends you hurtling towards your end. The softness of the kiss, the circles on your clit, and the slow yet perfect thrusts. It crashes over you unexpectedly and has you moaning out loudly disconnecting your lips just so you can catch your breath.
And the feeling of your walls clenching onto his member has him closer to his peak quickly as well. He's usually very sensitive in the morning so he isn't very surprised. So when you seemed to have caught your breath and you no longer are jerking with your orgasm, Joel is placing his lips back on yours. Kissing you deeply as he swallows your breathy moans from the overstimulation.
This causes him to reach his peak, cumming into the condom with a throaty moan. Thrusting roughly into you a few times to work himself through his orgasm. When he is finished he is pulling out of you and using your shoulder to turn you back to face him.
He pulls your head into his chest. Breathing is still a bit labored as the two of you just feel the other person. Appreciating the comfort. Breathing in each other's scents, content.
Later that day after a shower, with Joel, he drove you back to your house to drop you off. You didn't have any clothes with you after all, so you at least had to change and because you didn't exactly want to leave Joel yet, when you didn't see your mom's car in the driveway you convinced Joel to come up with you.
He didn't protest much after you promised him your mom would not be returning any time soon. So he followed you through the house and into your room. You ushered him in and watched as he took it all in. Shutting the door behind you two, you made your way across the room to Joel.
Wrapping your arms around him from behind as he looked at some pictures on your desk. You hadn't realized until now but Joel had never seen the way you lived and it was comforting to finally have him in your space.
"That's when I was seven." You said as he picked up a picture of you with a soccer ball in hand, blue jersey hanging on your little torso. "I begged my dad to sign me up for soccer and only did it for about three weeks before I decided I hated it." You laugh at the memory.
He laughs too and places it down, now picking up a picture of you and your friend from prom.
"That feels like ages ago." You muse, "There used to be another girl in this picture but she uh she fucked my boyfriend so I cut her out." You nod into his back before disconnecting your arms and moving across the room to sit on your bed. Playing with your hands, he places the photo down and moves to sit with you.
"I'd never do that to you." He says after a beat of silence.
"Fuck my boyfriend? I hope not." You try to joke but it doesn't fully reach your voice.
Joel grabs your hands, "Cheat on you." He says the thing you weren't sure you wanted to hear. You open your mouth but aren't sure what to say.
So he speaks instead, "You deserve the world and I want you to know that I'm prepared to give it to you." You smile, finally bringing your eyes to his.
"You sound so old!" You jest as you hit his chest. He grabs your wrist using it pull you forward into him. You fall into his chest, Joel uses that as an opportunity to stable you by a hand on your hip.
"If I really was that old, I don't think I could fuck you the way I do." He tone is laced with seduction as he brings his lips to ghost yours. Breath fans over your face, causing you to shiver. He smirks almost bringing up the inside joke of you being cold all the time. But throws this away to instead attach his lips to yours.
The kiss is fiery, not like the ones from this morning that were filled with passion, this one was like he needed to prove something. Prove he would always be yours and you would always be his.
His lips and his hands have you so much in a trance that neither of you hear a car pulling into the driveway. Or the front door opening. Or your mom calling out your name. Or climbing up the stairs. Or opening your door.
But you do hear the gasp and the sound of bags dropping to the floor as your mom sees the two of you. Pulling away quickly both you and Joel jump away from each other like a fire was just lit between you. Your head snaps to look at your mom and then back to Joel and notice she is doing the same thing with the both of you.
"Mom, I-" You try to explain but loose your words and good thing too because they would be falling on deaf ears anyways. With her blinking twice and rushing out of the room, back down the stairs, out of the house, and driving away.
You look back to Joel who has a mortified look on his face, then back to the doorway your mom was just in.
"Shit."
Part 2 !!!!!!!
#fanfiction#fanfic#pedro pascal#pedro pascal fanfiction#the last of us#joel miller#pedro pascal x reader#joel miller x reader#tlou joel#the last of us joel#last of us joel#joel the last of us#joel tlou#joel miller fanfiction#joel miller fanfic#joel miller smut#joel miller fic#joel miller x you#the last of us hbo#the last of us fanfiction#joel miller the last of us#tlou fanfiction#mbf! joel miller#dbf! joel miller#dbf! joel miller smut#mbf! joel miller smut#pedro pascal smut#pedro pascal characters#pedro pascal character fanfic#pedro pascal fic
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Once Upon a Time
Mike Schmidt x babysitter!f!reader
Word Count: 1864
Summary: Like all other imagines go, ever since Mike hired you as Abby’s babysitter, you’ve made their life so much more fun. Today’s fun? Playing fairy tales with Abby. Mike thinks it’s hilarious until he’s suddenly brought into production…
• • •
There was a satisfying ‘click’ when Mike turned the key. With one little shove, the door was open and he could breathe again. Another rough shift at work, but he was so grateful to be home. Where he could relax and just unwind…
And then he heard giggling. And he had the sinking feeling this was not going to be an “unwind” kind of day. What kind of mischief was Abby getting into now? Although, he much preferred hearing her laughter over the silence he used to get. Ever since he hired that new babysitter, Abby’s brightened up a lot. So, despite the drowsy drooping over his shoulders, he smiled as he shut the door behind him.
“Hey, I’m home!” He called out.
“We’re in here!” Your voice replied, making his smile twitch just a bit wider without him meaning to. You were such a saint. After what happened with the last babysitter, he thought he wouldn’t find another half as good, but you surpassed any and all expectation. Once he got the ball rolling better with work, he’d pay you. Soon.
“What on earth…” Mike’s voice trailed off when he saw what was going on in Abby’s room.
Lights were strung about, a great big fort connected to the ceiling and strung down like a canopy. With the use of cardboard, paper, and markers, the fort was surrounded by fake towers and what he assumed was a moat. And under the strung-up blankets were two familiar faces with paper crowns.
“We’re playing fairy tales,” You quickly explained, feeling the urge to take off the crown. You hadn’t felt self-conscious when it was just you and Abby, but when a cute guy looks at you? That’s a whole different thing. The embarrassment only worsened when you saw him stifle a laugh. Crap, what could he be thinking right now?
If only you knew that he thought you both made the cutest sight he'd ever seen.
"If we're going to do Snow White, we need an apple." Abby turned to you, refusing to let Mike ruin your fun together. She was not done playing. In fact, seeing the two of you looking at each other gave her a little idea...
"I'll go get the apple." You stepped over the cardboard towers and paper moat to head to the kitchen, "I'll be in the kitchen."
"Right behind ya," Mike added as he shrugged off his jacket.
You quickly took the crown off and set it down before going to the counter. You rummaged through the bowl of fruit, going past bananas and pears to find what you wanted.
Mike pulled out a Gatorade from the fridge, "Heh, thanks again for this. You have no idea what a difference you've made to Abby."
"Oh it's nothing. She's a lot of fun." You reassured him.
"I promise I'll pay you as soon as my check comes in, this isn't going to be the usual. You know, if, uh, you still want to continue this. I get it if you don't. You're not obligated to keep coming..." He was rambling now. He hadn't gotten like this since high school. Sheesh, what was going on with him? He reached up and adjusted his shirt's collar. It was getting warm in here all of a sudden.
"Mike, stop. You're completely fine. I'm happy to be here. After all, what are neighbors for?"
He shrugged. He'd just gotten so used to you being here, so quick. You fit right in. Looking back on it, the house used to feel so empty. Abby used to go to her room and just draw by herself. Mike would go to bed early or watch a couple shows on TV. Now, there was so much light and laughter brought in. He barely recognized his life anymore. He really hoped this was a sign for better days.
"Ah! Here we are, a classic red apple. I better not keep the princess waiting." You teased and started heading back to Abby's room, with a little skip in your step. But to your surprise, upon entering in, you saw Abby wearing her darkest purple blanket over her head like a cloak.
"I don't remember Snow wearing anything that dark."
"I'm not going to be Snow, you are." Abby told you and hurried to take the apple from you, "I got to be the princess the last two times. It's your turn."
You hadn't realized you were taking turns but okay.
"Where is your crown?" Abby squinted at you and made a face, "Mikeee! (Y/n) needs her crownnn!"
"Where is it?" He hollered from the other room.
"I left it on the counter!" You rose your voice, trying not to laugh. What has your life become? You felt like a Mom or something. And hey, you kind of liked it. Even though this wasn't your blood family or anything, you'd gotten real close with Mike and Abby. You just felt so comfortable with them.
Mike came back and briefly held up the crown, "Alright, where's the princess?"
Your face reddened and you sheepishly held up your hand, "Here."
He nodded and strolled over, briefly standing on his tip-toes to set it dramatically over your head, earning giggles from his sister. But just before he went to leave, Abby grabbed his arm and pulled him back.
"Don't go yet, I want you to watch!"
"Watch?" You echoed and your heart dropped to your stomach. Yeah, you were doing this for the kid, but you felt so shy playing pretend in front of Mike.
"Oh, alright, I'd be happy to watch." To your horror, Mike plopped down into the chair by Abby's desk and folded his arms. A big smile on his face.
Your eye twitched at the cocky little gesture. Oh, he was loving this, wasn't he? You didn't know if that was better or worse. But you tried to put it out of your mind when Abby got into character. She came up in her makeshift cloak,
"The evil witch approaches and knocks on Snow White's door..." Abby narrated before knocking on one of the blankets, pretending there was a thudding sound.
You stepped inside the fort then immediately poked your head out, forcing your gaze on Abby instead of Mike's amused face in the corner, "Hello?"
"Hello, young lady..." Abby ironically croaked, despite being many years younger than you, "I am giving out free apples. Would you like one?"
You heard muffled laughter again. Well, you weren't going to let him get to you. If he was going to pay you someday, you were going to earn every penny. He wanted a performance? Alright, here we go.
"Oh, how lovely! Of course!" You reached for it and held it to your mouth before taking a big bite.
"Muahaha! My plan is all coming together!" Abby rubbed her hands together and burst into a fit of mischievous giggles—that sounded a little too convincing for half a second.
"Oh no! I feel strange!" You held a hand to your head then spun around before making a dramatic 'fall' back onto the floor, bending your knees at the right second so the impact wouldn't be so bad. Besides, there were so many scattered pillows around, it wasn't harsh at all.
"Oh, bravo! Great job." Mike chuckled and clapped before starting to get up from his seat.
"Hey! The story isn't over!" Abby pointed a finger at him, "This part is important! I need your help!"
"Wait, what?"
"Snow White needs a handsome prince to wake her up." Abby explained and took off the cloak. She reached to the side for the crown she had made for herself, and handed it to Mike, "Your turn."
You had been pretending to be asleep but now your eyes were wide open. You started to sit up, "Oh, Abby, that's not necessary--"
Ohh it suddenly wasn’t so funny anymore. Was it, Mike? “Yeah, I'm really not an actor. You guys have fun, I'll just prepare dinner..."
But Abby wasn’t having it. She pointed to you first, “No! You! Lay back down! And you! Prince!”
Mike blinked down at his sister, but…apparently he didn’t have the strength to turn her down. He sighed and put the crown on his head. You honestly couldn’t believe it.
You slowly lowered back to the ground and closed your eyes. Not like you weren’t kind of hoping for a kiss from Mike one of these days, but you couldn’t say this is the way you expected to have your first one.
It certainly wasn’t the way Mike planned it, either. He had expected he’d finally get up the courage to ask you on a date. After he’d gotten around to paying you and proved he was in a better situation. But as soon as Abby found out of his crush on you, she had to push this to go a little quicker. He just had to hope he didn’t die of embarrassment in the process.
Abby took off her cloak and let out a gasp, “Oh no! My friend, Snow White is hurt! Help! Help! Prince Charming, come help!”
Mike sighed and walked over, “What’s wrong?”
“The princess has been poisoned! She needs true love’s kiss to wake her up!” Abby held her hands together and looked up at him with expectation.
“Abby, you really don’t expect me to—“ But the look she gave him told him she was serious. Was this really happening? Why didn’t he have the courage to tell her no?
He got down on his knees and looked over your features. He couldn’t tell but you were just as panicked about this. Your heart was pounding like crazy. What was he going to do? Maybe he’d kiss your forehead or your cheek. Something light just to say he did it. But no. When Mike lowered himself near to you, you were surprised by the touch of his lips. The soft scratch of his stubble. His breath was warm on your skin and made your heart flutter. This wasn’t the way you both had planned it, but it was a beautiful first kiss together.
Of course you both didn’t go crazy, Abby was right there, but it was a lingering kiss. Soft and sweet. Mike was surprisingly gentle. But just before you both could get used to it…
“Yay! The princess is saved!” Abby threw up her hands and giggled.
You both broke apart and nervously chuckled at the same time. You decided to speak first before it got awkward.
“Thank you so much for saving me!”
“Of course.” Mike dutifully bowed his head like a prince would, briefly licking his lips.
“Now the prince carries Snow White off into happily ever after!” Abby beamed.
“Heh, alright. Right this way, princess.” Mike gently scooped you up into his arms and rose to his feet with no issue. Wow, he was strong…
“Off to happily ever after?” You giggled and wrapped your arms around his neck.
“Off to the spaghetti and meatballs I’m making for dinner.” He replied.
You held a hand to your chest and laughed heartily, “Oh, my hero!”
The end.
#mike schmidt fnaf#mike schmidt fanfiction#mike schmidt#josh hutcherson#fnaf fanfiction#mike schmidt imagine#Mike schmidt one-shot#mike and Abby Schmidt#mike schmidt fluff#Mike schmidt x reader#mike schmidt x you#mike schmidt x y/n
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Quiet 2
P1 P3 P4 P5 P6 P7 P8
pairing: y/n and Matt sturniolo
summary: a girl with a lot of baggage and a boy with even more try to help put each others pieces back together one by one. A story about a girl who’s broken and a boy who doesn’t talk
warnings: mentions of death, mentions of family relationship issues, mentions of drinking, mentions of not eating (not in a ed way)
I felt sick to my stomach by the time I went home. My classes were hard, I was yelled at by a kid I didn't know, and the one friend I tried to make literally didn't speak to me.
I don't think he minded my presence though. Or maybe he did. I wouldn't know either way.
I didn't want to take the bus home. Mainly because it was smelly. Or mainly because I didn't want to go home.
I felt my stomach clench.
I didn't like Massachusetts. It was cold and montone here. Flordia was different. It was full of color and life and warmth. I missed my home. I missed my mom.
I wasn't the same after she died, I think that's why dad wanted to move somewhere else. It was like he couldn't stand the ghost of her in the house. I couldn't either, but it was nice to at least feel like she was still there, even if she wasn't really.
Here, she's no where. No matter how hard I looked around.
My dad was born and raised in Boston, but they moved to Flordia when they had me. It wasn't hard for my dad to decide to move back here. I just didn't know we were moving until he came into my room with boxes.
God, I hated that day.
I shook the thoughts out of my head. I turned on the street to a busy road before spotting a convenient store. I paused looking down at my knee. Some hydrogen peroxide, Neosporin, and some bandaids would heal this up in a matter of days.
No.
Just leave it Y/n.
I continued walking, but I felt my body tug towards the store.
Fuck it, I've done some worse things in my life. No one knows me here. Fuck a fresh start.
I turned on my feet and walked towards the store before pulling the door open and hearing the bell ring above my head. The worker behing the counter looked about my age, scrolling through his phone. Bingo.
I glanced around the store, it was small. Double bingo. I reached behind my head and threw up my hood before walking through the aisles. I lifted my head and searched the ceiling for any type of cameras.
I saw some in the corner before noticing the red light wasn't flashing. I made my way to the medicine aisle before locating the bandaids and picking up a box.
I felt my heart tug and my mom's voice come through my head.
You're better than this.
I might be better than this, but I also didn't have another choice. I just wanted some bandaids. I didn't let the voice sink into my soul before I slipped the bandaids in my pocket and glanced around my shoulder. I didn't see anyone.
I walked along the aisle before seeing Neosporin and picking it up and slipping it into my other pocket. I felt my heart start to beat. I didn't know if it was nerves or adrenaline.
I eyed the hydrogen peroxide. I sighed. It wouldn't fit in my pockets. I swallowed. I could probably do without. I could just clean it the old fashion way with some soap and water.
Okay, I gotta get out of here now. I turned on my feet before making my way out of the aisle I was in. I kept my head down as I walked.
"Have a good day"
I froze on my feet and looked up seeing the boy who was still focused in on his phone. He wasn't looking up at me. I didn't respond to the gesture before I turned and left the store.
-
"Dad?" I lowered my hood and glanced around the kitchen, into the living room. Sometimes when I called out to him, I didn't know If I wanted to hear a response or not.
"Are you home?" I asked quieter. I walked into the living room before walking over to the empty couch. I glanced down to a few more empty beer cans that weren't there when I left this morning. I swallowed the lump in my throat as I picked up at can.
I heard the front door shut.
I jumped and turned my head.
"Y/n!" He yelled before his eyes landed on mine. I froze and my hand froze on the beer. He smiled and held up a bag. I glanced down at the bag feeling like I just got caught doing something I wasn't suppose to.
"I got some food, let's eat" He smiled at me. I let my face relax and I nodded. He set down the food on the table before walking over to me and grabbing the beer can out of my hand and bending down and grabbing the other cans along the table.
"Sorry, I meant to clean this shit up earlier" He mumbled as he grabbed and crushed them. I just stepped back and watched him. He looked up at me with a warm face.
"Go eat kid, I know you must be starving. I got the noodles you like" He stood up and walked over to the trashcan discarding the beer cans. I was starving. I hadn't had a real meal in three days. The only thing I had today was one bite of a overripe apple.
I smiled and nodded as I walked over to the bag and opened the food.
-
The dinner was awkward to say the least. It consisted of us chewing and the sound of our plastic forks digging into the boxes of food, but I didn't care. These noodles tasted like honey.
I couldn't help but smile when I took a first bite.
"How was school? It was your first day today right? We're the kids nice to you and shit?" He chuckled glancing up at me. I looked up at him and wiped my face with the back of my hand.
"Uh, you know how kids are" I said shaking my head not really wanting to dive into my day. He chuckled and nodded. "I do, they are little shits" He nodded. I swallowed and stabbed some noodles on my fork slowly.
"Not you though--You've got a good heart, you" He pointed towards his chest and looked up at me. "Got your mother's heart" He nodded. I forced a smile and nodded up at him as I took another bite.
I never wanted this dinner to end, but in some ways I did. My dad and I don't have the best relationship. We never really did, but I didn't mind it because I had my mom. When she left, It felt like our person in common got taken away.
A lot changed.
My dad didn't know how to talk to me and I didn't know how to talk to him. We he did talk to me, he was yelling. Except for every once in a while.
"What about friends? Did you make any friends? I can clean up the place if you wanna have some over" He asked sparking up a new conversation while shoving food into his mouth.
I cleared my throat as I looked down at my plate. "It was just the first day dad" I mumbled feeling redness come up my neck.
How am I suppose to tell my dad my first day was awful and everyone was just mean?
"Well I know. I was just--" He shook his head and let out a breath. I felt guilt come up my throat that I had no good news to report back to my dad. Like it had been my fault that I hadn't made any friends.
"There was this one kid at lunch" I stated. He glanced up at me and smiled. "Yeah?" He smiled. I nodded and pushed around some noodles on my plate.
"He didn't really talk to me though, but he let me sit with him" I breathed, once the words fell out of my mouth I realized how stupid they sounded. My dad smacked his lips and nodded.
I closed my eyes wishing that in this moment I could just disappear. I felt like a failure.
-
"Windows, Sunflowers when it's sunny, palm trees, series books, the color blue...." I whispered to myself as the tears clouded my eyes and I applied Neosporin to my knee carefully when I got out of the shower.
I wiped my eyes as I reached for the bandaids. "Hikes, The Killers, new shoes..." I ripped the box open that was covered in lies and crimes. I swallowed and opened one, putting it over my wound.
"My mom" I finished and pressed my forehead to my patched up knee.
I'd only been here a week and I was miserable. I didn't understand the point. My point. What was the point?
Just keep naming things Y/n
My mother voice rang.
I wiped my runny nose and looked towards the wall. "Long walks, book stores, old music, coffee..." I named things until I forgot what I was even thinking about.
-
"Can I sit?" I asked looking down at the quiet boy. He blinked up at me. No fear in his eyes this time like the first time when I asked. Somewhat of a surprise. He glanced around the room before his eyes landed on an empty table.
He motioned to the empty table. I turned to look at it and then back to him. He just stared up at me. I bit my lip.
I didn't want to sit alone. That was almost worse than eating in the bathroom. Me asking to sit with him and then him saying no and then going to sit alone was even worse than all of the above.
I took in breath and pushed the tears behind my eyes further down my face. I didn't want to cry today, It was my goal.
"Can I sit?" I asked again my voice quieter. He set down his sandwich and shrugged looking down towards his phone. I just stared at him. I guess that was as much of a yes I was going to get from him.
I sat down and shrugged off my bag.
I upzipped it, but instead of pulling out food, I pulled out a book. If I read I learned that I couldn't focus on the lack of food in my stomach. I opened the book and looked down at it.
August. My favorite time of the year. Where my happiness sprung from. All those summer ago is when I first learned where the happiness sprung from. I was 12---
I felt his eyes burn into me and I looked up from my book.
"What?" I snapped. He just looked at me. I closed my book. "What? Why are you staring at me?" I asked a little harsher that I intended. His eyes widened and he picked up the headphone that he dropped when I walked up to him and shoved it back into his ear.
I felt guilt run cold over me.
"I'm sorry--I didn't mean to yell I--" I swallowed as he looked back up at me. "I just get like this when I'm….tired" I whispered. I didn't know If I was talking to him or just saying this to myself. It was weird because talking to him was like talking to myself, just with an extra pair of eyes.
I looked back up at him. He looked down at my book and then to my bag. I looked at my bag then to him.
"What?" I mumbled. He looked down at his lap and took in a breath like something was running through his brain. I just watched him as his eyes glanced around the table.
What was he doing?
He picked up a bag of chips and looked at me and then looked at the empty table in front of me. I looked down in front of me and then realized what he was asking.
Why don't you have any food?
"Are you asking why I'm not indulging in my amazing choice of fruit today?" I smiled. I could have sworn I saw the corners of his mouth turn up for a split second, but it was gone so fast that I didn't know for sure if it happened.
He nodded.
I let my smile fall slightly but I contained it. "I'm actually on an apple-only strike and I had the last one yesterday. I think other foods are basically pointless when apples exist, and there wasn't one in my fridge so I said forget it" I smiled at him before the pit in my stomach deepened.
"Someone had to stand up for the apple. Today I decided that It was my duty" I smiled.
I wasn't lying about the fact that there wasn't an apple in my fridge. The apple only strike was obvious bullshit. The only thing left in my fridge was that apple. My stomach twisted.
"Plus why eat when you could soak in the nutrients of words of literature" I forced a smile and held up my book. He just stared at me, blankly. I bit my lip and my eyes stared at the page.
I could feel the fact that he hadn't looked away, I was just ingnoring it. My eyes scanned the page over and over but I wasn’t retaining any of the words. I looked up at him. He locked my gaze.
"Stop looking at me" I stated looking back at my book. He looked down at his lap before he started packing up his things. I looked up from my book.
"Where are you going?" I asked quickly. Lunch just started. He didn't look up at me as he put his stuff into his bag. I felt my heart sink. I set down my book.
"I didn't mean to upset you" I whispered as he just ignored me and zipped up his bag. Without another word he stood up and left. I glanced down to the table before I realized he had left half of his sandwhich and his bag of chips.
I looked up and saw him walk out of the cafeteria.
"Wait" I stood up but he was already gone. I swallowed and sat back down and looked at the food he had left.
Part of me was offended, the other part was too hungry to care.
I blinked at the food and then back towards the door of the cafeteria. Maybe was coming back. I sat back in my seat. 15 minutes past and he didn't return.
I swallowed before reaching over and grabbing the sandwhich and taking a bite of out it.
-
I pushed through the doors of the school. Today was a better day. No one yelled at me for taking their seat. I guess that was a plus. I had to give credit where it was due.
I was invisible basically, I talked to no one. Well one person, but they never talked back to me. I was okay with just reading and being quiet in the back of the class. I wondered if that's what quiet boy thought too, or if he hated it.
What does he think about? Could he read my lies through my teeth or was he just guessing that I was bluffing about the apple-strike. I shook my head at myself. An apple-strike? That's the best thing I could come up with?
I didn't want him to pity me. God, did I not want him to pity me. I was okay with the fact that I didn't always have a hot meal for lunch. Or dinner. Sometimes. Most days.
I swallowed the lump in my throat attempting to push out the thoughts from my head. "My life is good everything’s okay" I whispered to myself. It wasn't working.
"Sunsets, beaches, boats, birds..." I shook my head. I looked up seeing the bus closing it's doors. "Fuck" I spat before running towards the bus as it pulled away. My feet stopped running after it as I hung my head in defeat.
The walk home yesterday wasn't exactly short. It was dark before I got home yesterday. I looked around before I saw the back of a boy with brown hair walking away from the school.
Before I knew what I was doing I was moving fast on my feet towards him.
"Hey"
He almost jumped out of his skin before he turned around and looked down at me. He let go of a breath and his face returned to it's normal state, a blank stare. I smiled softly up at him and he took in a breath and turned away from me, walking.
I pushed off my feet and walked up beside him, attempting to match his speed. He looked down at me and stopped walking.
He glanced down at me and I looked up at him. "I'm not stalking you I swear" I breathed shaking my head looking at him. He furrowed his eyebrows. I probably shouldn't have started with that.
"I missed my bus" I pointed to the bus that was exiting the parking lot. He turned and looked at the bus and then back at me. Blank stare.
"Do you care if I walk with you?" I asked. He just stared down at me. I blinked up at him. "Okay" I breathed looking around. "If I can't walk with you, blink three times" I smiled. He just looked unimpressed down at me.
"If you don't want me to, blink three times" I stated. He raised his eyebrows. I sighed. "Give me something quiet boy" I whined looking up at him. He tilted his head in confusion. I sighed.
"Fine, don't walk with me then" I mumbled before turning walking off. I looked in front of me. "Pancakes, plane rides, soup..." I whispered to myself. Even good days aren't good days.
A few seconds later I heard footsteps come up to me. I glanced up before seeing the quiet boy walking next to me. He didn't glance down at me and I looked away slightly smiling to myself.
Is asking him if we are friends pushing it?
#matt sturniolo#nick sturniolo#sturniolo fanfic#nicolas sturniolo#sturniolo smut#chris sturniolo#sturniolo x reader#christopher sturniolo#sturniolo triplets
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When You Fall In Love...
so i've been reading icebreaker and it's been putting me in the hockeyrry mood
part one, part two, bonus, bonus
Harry watched from the empty stands as Y/n ran through her routine for the fifth time. Her teammates had gone home, her coach asked Harry if he would lock up on the way out, and now it was just the two of them in the empty rink. There wasn't even any music playing anymore, Y/n was just skating and performing her tricks as if there was.
Every time she did it, it was flawless. Her routine was fast and intense and incredibly difficult, but Y/n performed with ease every time. She landed her tricks like they were nothing, tricks which Harry now knew the names of and could tell the difference between a lutz and an axel. She was incredible, and he was in awe of her every single time.
But even in her perfection, Y/n had yet to smile once.
Harry decided she'd had enough after she finished her fifth run-through, quickly jogging down to the edge of the rink before she could skate out to the middle again. He leaned over the barricade and kissed the top of her head. This close to her, he could see her rosy cheeks and heaving chest, a sign that her routine did wear her out, despite making it look so effortless.
"You were phenomenal as usual, baby," Harry said while he gathered her things.
"I bobbled a landing and my timing was off for a whole four counts," was her reply.
Harry frowned, not pleased by her recent negativity. Any athlete could be critical of their ability, but Y/n seemed uncharacteristically hard on herself lately, and he had no idea why. "Everything okay?" He asked, shouldering her duffle bag as they walked away from the rink.
"I'm fine."
She certainly didn't sound fine, but Harry decided not to push. Not now, anyway. Changing the subject, he said, "I got an email from the recruiter. I should be receiving my contract soon."
Excitement didn't even begin to cover how Harry had been feeling lately. Last week, he'd met with an agent of a minor league hockey team, one that was a feeder to an NHL team. He expressed their interest in Harry moving to the east coast after graduation and join them for spring training. And after giving it some thought, Harry accepted.
He was over the moon, thrilled that years of hard work was finally paying off. He'd made his passion into a career, and had the potential to really make a name for himself. Life couldn't have been better.
But where Harry seemed to be flying high, Y/n seemed stuck. She was happy for him when he told her the news, had gone out to celebrate with him that night. But something felt off between them. Harry couldn't put a name to it, but he just knew.
"That's great," Y/n said with no amount of enthusiasm in her voice. Harry tried not to take it to heart, she was clearly in a mood from her practice. She was under a lot of pressure too, he reminded himself, and sometimes had a knack for not knowing how to express herself with words.
"Is there something on your mind? You've been quiet recently," he said, hoping he wasn't overstepping her delicate boundary.
Y/n shook her head as she approached her car, sliding into the driver's seat without a word. Harry couldn't help but feel more and more like there was something on her mind, but he let it go again.
Before pulling the car out of the parking lot, Y/n rested her hand over his and leaned in to kiss him. "I'm sorry. I've just got a lot on my mind."
"It's okay. As long as you know you can talk to me about it."
Her throat bobbed, but she nodded, then turned her focus toward the road. Harry filled the silence with rambling. He talked mostly about the NHL, about his contract and where he wanted to live and how everything was happening so fast.
So caught up in trying to break the tension, he didn't notice Y/n's white-knuckle grip on the steering wheel.
*.*
"Styles! What the hell are you doing? Focus up! Let's go!"
Harry rested his hands on his knees, breathing heavily during the brief pause in the game. His eyes flicked up to the stands, searching the crowd for a familiar face, but he didn't see the one he needed the most.
Despite being recruited by a minor league hockey team, Harry was probably having the worst game of his life.
Not one pass connected, he was letting second-rate players get by him, and he'd spent more time in the penalty box than in the actual game. Nothing about this was right, and still all he could do was look for Y/n.
She wasn't there, and even though things had been weird between them recently, he was still surprised. When she wasn't at a competition of her own, Y/n came to every one of Harry's games. It had started out as Harry wanting to impress her, maybe show off a little, and then as time went on and they grew closer and their relationship became more than two people having sex in secret, he wanted her to be there just because it felt good knowing she was watching him play. All his nerves floated away when Y/n was sat in the stands, sometimes in his jersey, cheering him on.
And of course there were times when she couldn't come, but this wasn't one of those times. Y/n had purposely not shown up. He knew they'd fought before the game, but he didn't think she would abandon him just to be petty. They were past that now.
His sole focus should've been on the game he was playing, but instead his mind kept drifting to the fight.
Harry could feel Y/n pulling away from him. He finally felt like he was getting everything he wanted—a spot on a minor league hockey team on the east coast that would eventually lead him to the NHL, graduating with semi-decent grades thanks to Y/n, and of course being with his dream girl. At first, she'd seen him as some douchey athlete that was only good for one thing. He remembered seeing her for the first time their freshman year, performing tricks on the ice that he'd only ever seen on TV, and when he whistled and clapped loudly—perhaps a little obnoxiously—after she'd finished, she'd rolled her eyes at him and told him to fuck off.
It was love at first sight.
Harry had been so careful around Y/n. He played by her rules and followed her lead, trying not to let the comments about them not dating get to him too much. He liked their initial dynamic, finding it funny when he got under her skin because she made it so easy. It became a kind of game, this push and pull that was fun and exciting and eventually led to their arrangement.
He knew that she cared about him on some level, he just needed to bide his time and show her he wasn't who she thought he was. Not entirely, anyway. And when she finally did, and they became more than just people who screwed around, everything was perfect.
They'd been through so much together. Y/n pushed Harry to be better, and he worked with her to master new tricks and nail her routine. There wasn't anyone else who understood his level of commitment to hockey, but she did, and that just made him love her more.
So when he got the call offering him a spot on the minor league team, Y/n was the first person Harry told. She'd been happy for him, and he was over the moon, his mind already making a million plans—where they'd live, her coming to his games, him helping her find a new rink to train at. It felt like the doors to a new and exciting world had opened for them, but she then she started pulling back, and Harry practically watched as that door slammed shut.
Harry pushed himself to focus back on the game, on the hockey stick in his hand and the ice beneath his skates. He felt like it took more effort than it should've to get his head back in the game, but his team managed to pull out a win, and he managed not to get benched before it happened. That didn't stop his coach from ripping him a new one in the locker room, but Harry sat there and took it, shaking his head and promising his piss poor performance would never happen again.
Exhausted both physically and mentally, he trudged out of the locker room and toward the parking lot, debating whether to take the bus home or call an Uber. Even in his senior year, he still didn't have a car, but Y/n was usually there to give him a ride home. To their home. Moving in together for their last year of school seemed like a no-brainer, and it had been amazing so far, though the last week had been kind of a disaster. Harry could feel the tension between them growing, but every time he asked Y/n about it, she'd say she was fine even though they both knew everything was not fine, and the cycle continued. He wanted to be excited, he wanted to celebrate the success he'd managed to create for himself, but he felt rather deflated instead.
To Harry's surprise, Y/n was waiting for him in the parking lot. He didn't hesitate putting his gear in the trunk and coming around to sit in the passenger seat. Y/n leaned in to kiss him immediately holding onto the sides of his face fervently.
"I'm sorry," she breathed. "I'm sorry for not being here tonight and I'm sorry for acting strange, and I'm sorry for—"
"Y/n, what's going on with you?" Harry couldn't help but ask.
"Can we wait until we get home to talk?" She asked. I want to be able to talk to you properly, and I can't if I'm driving.
When Harry nodded, Y/n must've deemed it enough. She peeled away from the rink, silent tension filling the air between once again. It had been following them around all week.
That ended tonight, though. He didn't care how much Y/n hated confrontation or hard conversations. They couldn't move forward if they didn't move past this roadblock first. Harry loved Y/n more than he ever thought possible, and stubborn as she was, he knew she loved him just as much. He would get to the bottom of this, no matter how hard she tried to fight him on the way down.
*.*
"Y/n, you know I would be ecstatic if you'd told me you qualified for the Olympics. This is a huge step in my career! Why can't you be happy for me?"
"I am! God, Harry, I am."
"Then why are you pulling away from me? I feel like I can't be excited about this around you when you're the one person who should understand how this feels."
"I can't do this. I can't have this argument with you," you said, trying to step away from him.
Harry was quick to grab your hands in his, keeping you from walking away. "What aren't you telling me? Do you want to break up?"
"No!
"Do you not love me anymore? What? What is it, Y/n?"
"God, I didn't—I didn't ask for this," you cried, feeling like a damn had burst inside you. It was out now, and now you had to see it through to the end. "I didn't plan on falling in love with you. I wasn't prepared to love you this much. You're the one who wanted to take things further, and now you're—"
You're leaving me, you couldn't bring yourself to say. You really were happy for him. All of his dreams were coming true, and he had an ambition that matched yours, which made you love him more. And now that ambition was taking him far away from you, and you weren't handling it as well as you thought you would.
"Y/n—"
"I'm happy for you, H, I'm so happy for you that I could burst. And maybe even a little jealous," you joked, though there was some truth to what you said. "But I guess I just...I guess I didn't expect to love you this much. And I don't—I don't know what to do because you're going soon and I'm..."
You had no clue, and that alone was terrifying.
At the start of all this, you never imagined falling in love with Harry. He drove you absolutely insane, and despite your physical attraction to him, you kept your distance. But he kept doing these things that made you like him, and eventually care about him, and finally made you fall in love with him. It just wasn't something you saw coming. Love was definitely not on the brain when you met Harry.
Because you knew this moment was inevitable. The moment when one of you would be given an opportunity you couldn't refuse and would pull you away from each other. Once upon a time, you thought you would be given your dream job of a lifetime—competitive skating and hopefully the Olympics—but somewhere down the line, skating stopped bringing you joy, only pressure and anxiety. And now Harry had his dream job on the other side of the country, and you were left to flounder and wonder how you would survive waking up without him next to you.
"You're making it seem like it's a bad thing that you're in love with me," Harry said quietly, but the low tone of his voice didn't hide anything. You knew he was getting upset. After all the avoidance the last week—on your part—yours and his emotions were coming to a head.
"It's not! It's just that you're leaving!" you said, resisting the urge to run a frustrated hand through your hair. "And all week you've talked about how excited to get out of here and leave this all behind and start a new chapter in your life. I mean, would it kill you to act like you're a little torn up about leaving?"
It was so selfish, and you knew it was. It was why you'd been avoiding Harry, this conversation. Harry had every right to be proud and ecstatic for leaving to play in the professional league. He worked so hard, pushed himself farther than anyone you'd ever met, except for maybe you. Your pain was clouding your good sense, and now you'd shown just how horrible you could really be.
You couldn't look him in the eye after saying what you did. Even if it was how you felt, you still felt ashamed for raining on Harry's parade. "Y/n—" he tried to say when you hastily wiped a tear from your eye.
"I shouldn't have said anything. I'm sorry," you said, getting up from the couch and scurrying off to your bedroom.
Flopping on the bed, you pulled the covers over you, trying to hide from everything happening around you. It was too much. Your senior year was supposed to be fun and full of unforgettable memories, not arguments and heartache.
You weren't sure how much time had passed before the door opened and Harry slipped inside. He slid into bed next to you, and you didn't fight it when he rested his face in the crook of your neck. Because despite everything you were feeling, this was all you really needed.
"I'm not leaving you behind," he murmured gently. "You mean too much to me."
You sniffled, and Harry pulled you closer to his chest. "You're going to be thousands of miles away."
"Says who?" he said, kissing your cheek. "Who says you aren't coming with me?"
"And do what?" you huffed, even though the thought slightly lifted your spirits. "Be one of your...puck whatevers and follow you around like a puppy? I need a life of my own too."
You were being stubborn and argumentative and you both knew it. There was some relief in knowing Harry wanted you with him, but you also didn't want to just move because Harry was. You needed purpose, you needed to feel like your life had some sort of direction in it. But it was unfair to put all of that on Harry, and you didn't know how to express how you felt without sounding insane, so instead you said nothing, and that obviously went over brilliantly.
Harry chuckled. "See, because you just said how in love you are with me, I can tell that you're frosty attitude is just an act. Now turn over and look at me."
You reluctantly turned over, brow furrowed exaggeratedly because you couldn't cross your arms over your chest. It used to infuriate you how easily Harry could get under your skin because he knew you so well, that he knew just what to do or say to pull you out of a bad mood. In this moment, you were thankful. He could see past all the harsh words and see to the root of the problem. You'd said some things that were perhaps out of order, but Harry understood. Despite everything, he understood.
"You've worked just as hard as me, Y/n. I want to be there for you the way you've been for me. You can achieve your goals too."
"I just...I don't know if I want to achieve them anymore," you said quietly.
It was the first time you'd said it out loud. Since you'd learned to skate, there had only been one goal: the Olympics. Getting there wasn't just a matter of training, it was about devoting your life to your craft, it was barely having a life outside of training and competitions and giving all your time to winning. And after spending nearly your entire life doing it, you felt yourself slowly burning out. You'd go through your routines flawlessly, but your heart wasn't in it. All you could think about was the future—the next competition, the next training session, the next qualifier. It took seeing Harry so happy about being drafted to the minor leagues to realize the fire had gone out in you. Thinking of Olympic qualifiers and training and affording coaches and costumes and picking the right music only filled you with dread when you should've felt joy.
"Oh."
"But I don't know who I am if I don't have skating."
"You don't have to compete to skate, you know," Harry said. He rested his hand against your cheek, rubbing his thumb along your temple lightly. "You can c—"
"Oh God, don't say coach," you groaned. "It's perfect. You'll be a hockey superstar and I'll be the washed-up figure skater who couldn't handle the pressure of being an athlete and wound up coaching instead."
"I know you're being like this because you're scared, and that's okay," he said. "But I'll help you find a new dream, Y/n. I promise."
You had to blink away tears because your heart couldn't take how much he cared about you. "Even when I've been a complete bitch?"
"You haven't been. I'm sorry if you felt like I was leaving you behind. I guess in my mind we would always be together, no matter where we ended up."
"God I hate how much I love you sometimes," you grumbled while flinging yourself on top of Harry and holding him tight. "It's too much, you're too much, and I can't stand it—"
"There's a compliment in there somewhere, right?" Harry asked, but you could hear the grin in his voice.
Sitting up, you perched yourself on him, your legs straddling his waist. Dipping down, you made sure your noses were brushing, but you didn't close the distance. Not yet. Your heart was racing simply because Harry had been so kind to you, because he knew you so well and said exactly what you needed to hear. It felt ridiculous to know that there was a time when he pissed you off so much you saw red, that his teasing remarks and cocky grin grated on your nerves. Now you didn't want to imagine a life without him.
"I'm sorry for saying all of those things," you murmured. "I really am proud of you. No one deserves this more than you do."
Harry's hand reached up and threaded through your hair, his fingers gentle as they passed over your scalp. "I know you are. And I mean it, Y/n. I'll help you. I know you love to skate, we just have to find a way to channel that into something else. If not coaching, maybe performing?"
"What? Like Disney on Ice?" you asked skeptically, your nose wrinkling at the thought.
Harry shrugged as his hand dipped beneath your shirt to stroke your back. "You'd be a cute princess."
"With my luck, they'd make me a tree."
"Then you'd be the cutest tree there ever was."
Shaking your head, you nudged your nose against his again. "Can we hit pause on talking about the future? I just want to be with you here. Right now."
"Course," Harry said, one corner of his mouth turning up into a crooked grin. "And then maybe we can circle back to you being my puck whatever."
"Shut up."
"Make me!"
And that was something you knew how to do better than your skating routine.
#harry styles#hockey player!harry styles#ice skater!y/n#harry styles blurb#harry styles x reader#harry styles fanfic#harry styles oneshot#harry styles imagine#harry styles fanfiction#harry styles x you#harry styles fluff#harry styles writing#harry styles one shot#harry styles fic#hockeyrry
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Late night talk
Zoro Roronoa x reader
Summary : late night at Going Merry always makes you feel lonely. Fortunately,your new friend and crew mate is there to keep you company.
Warnings : slightly suggestive (?), mutual pinning and kissing!
*.✧∘˚˳°*.✧∘˚˳°*.✧∘˚˳°*.✧∘˚˳°*.✧∘˚˳°*.✧∘˚˳°*.✧∘˚˳°*.✧∘
Nights at Going Merry,are hard to spend alone.
The feeling of gentle waves hitting the wooden surface,the cool breeze giving you a slight shiver as you lean against the railing and rest your head on your folded arms;makes you feel slightly lonely.
Maybe its because you've just recently joined the StrawHats crew;away from your hometown where you spent all your life in. You loved your family and friends,but you just couldn't let this opportunity slide. Not when Luffy extended his hand to you,and treated you like family, like someone who was talented and worth giving a chance.
And you wouldn't let go of that hand. No.
So you joined the StrawHats,in hopes of finding your own meaning of life, and help Luffy and everyone else to the journey of One Piece.
But still, everything was fairly new to you. Spending all your time on a ship with nothing but deep blue around you,with the company of people you just recently met;your captain a sweet guy,but kinda loud. Ussop the same as Luffy. Nami a great girl, but you were kinda shy around her. The new cook,Sanji,the sweetest guy but he was always busy in the kitchen where you didnt even dare to step a foot in. And your last Crew mate-
"what're you doing up so late?"
Zoro Roronoa
The guy you've been tiptoeing around since the very first second you laid your eyes on him. To say you had a crush was an understatement;you were hopelessly in love with the swordsman.
You give him a sheepish smile as you try to look anywhere expect his eyes.
"i- uh, couldn't sleep?"
Zoro merely stares at you before slowly making his way towards where you're standing. There's a bottle of wine in his hand as he adjusts his three swords on his hip and leans against the railing as well. He raises the bottle to his lips and glances at you from the corner of his eye.
"you want some?"
When you shake your head,he only shrugs.
"more for me."
he starts drinking,and you watch as his Adam's apple bob,you immediately look the other way when your heartbeat rises.
There was a damn reason as why you kept avoiding being alone with Zoro in the first place.
You couldn't keep the heat from spreading across your cheeks and neck;and your heart seemingly beating out of your chest.
it was no secret that Zoro wasnt a huge fan of talking either. The number of time where you managed to hold a conversation with the guy without him dozing off, barely reached five fingers. And your massive crush didn't help.
So you just stood there silently, listening to the sound of the ocean and Zoro downing the bottle of wine. The silence was so uncomfortable,you could feel the awkwardness in the air.
You just prayed to gods that Zoro would start a conversation.
"so,what kept you awake tonight?"
And gods seem to have nothing better to do tonight.
You dangle your arm from the side of the ship; watching as small droplets of water slightly soaking your fingers.
"i guess...i just miss my hometown."
At that,Zoro raises a neatly trimmed eyebrow ,and again,offers you the almost empty bottle of wine. At that,you let out a small giggle,cheeks flushing because he looks absolutely adorable.
"i dont wanna drink!"
"But you said you miss your hometown. That sounds like a good enough reason for a drink to me."
You merely shrug and grin at him
"guess im not as alcoholic as you are,oh the greatest swordsman alive."
Zoro rolls his eyes at you,and empties the rest of the wine before throwing the bottle in the ocean. You watch as it vanishes in the dark night,before a faint SPLASH is heard when it hits the water down below.
"Sanji's gonna be mad at you. You know he hates throwing trash in the ocean."
"you have any more trash on you then?"
And you laugh, carefree and happy. For a moment there,you seem to forget how lonely you felt not too long ago.
Because thats how Zoro was;he was a quiet man,but had the biggest heart you knew. He would always stay at the corner,but never once taking his eyes off of his friends.
And you were so damn lucky to have him by your side.
You gently bump your shoulder to his; slowly moving closer to his side.
"so why were you awake?"
He spares you a glance before look at another side.
"no reason."
"Zoro, c'mon. You take every chance you get to take a nap. You cant be awake for no reason."
You hear him huff annoyingly at you;the sound making you grin winder. And you do the best thing you know:
Annoy the shit out of him
You start with poking his bicep;trying not to drool at the way his muscles tense under your touch,before moving up to his cheek and increase the speek of your poking.
But you could only go for long,before suddenly Zoro's grabbing at your wrist,and with a smooth move pulls you toward him.
Where your faces are inches away,and you can feel his breath fanning on your skin
You swallow loudly, trying to pull back and put some distance between yourselves,but he holds on tight;not too tight to hurt,but enough to keep you in your place. He moves his face impossibly closer,and his warm lips brush against your heated cheeks.
"you dont wanna mess with me," he murmurs;his voice raw with something you can't put a finger on, "I'm a dangerous guy."
Maybe its the adrenaline in your veins,or maybe its because its late at night and nights always made you bolder. So you turn your head slightly so your nose in brushing against his cheekbone,and catch his eyes.
"and what if i like to play with danger?"
Zoro lets out a low chuckle;his eyes shifting to your lips and his hand slowly resting on your hip
"Then dont say i didnt warn ya."
And then his lips are on yours.
Your eyes flutter shut as he pulls you close;your hands finding their ways to his hard chest,and then around his neck to pull him in. Zoro lets out a groan,and his hold on you tightens more.
With one hand resting on your hip and the other traveling up and down your spine,he pulls away to let you breath for only a second before diving back in.
Because Zoro was always drunk,but your lips might be his favorite thing to get drunk on from now on
You dont know how much time has passes before you pull away;both of you panting heavily and Zoro places small kisses on your cheeks and temples.
"you didnt answer the question, y'know."
You feel him pause against your skin and you grin.
"what question?"
"why were you awake?"
Zoro groans but when you tug at his hair,he just hides his face in your neck and when he speaks next,you feel his lips touching your sensitive skin.
"saw you space out alot at dinner and then you didnt go to sleep. Didnt want to leave ya alone."
With the confession,your heart flutters and butterflies fill your stomach. You card your fingers through his green locks and move his face so you can plant a loving kiss on his lips.
"thank you,Zoro."
"the pleasure is all mine."
And when he kisses you next,its filled with laughter and happiness.
Nights at Going Merry,are hard to spend alone.
But when you kiss Zoro until the sunrise,you cant help but wish for it to last longer.
If it meant to spend it with your love, you'll gladly wait for skies to turn dark.
#zoro x reader#zoro roronoa x reader#opla x reader#opla zoro x reader#one piece live action x reader
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And Yet..
Paring(s): jj maybank x fem!reader
Summary: two people who should be together simply can't find their way. In other words, JJ can't let himself be loved and can't let her go.
Author's note: This one is brutal so prepare yourselves. Realistically, JJ would totally self sabotage any chance of happiness because he can't handle how it makes him feel so that's exactly what this is. Thank you for all the feedback on 3 seconds! If you like when it hurts, then this is for you!
Part 1: Three Seconds
-------------------
He left.
It’d been hours and none of us knew where JJ went, only that he left. While JJ storming off was a normal feat, he always came back.
Now normally, I would have been looking for him, knowing exactly where to look. I’d find him and we’d avoid everyone until he felt like he was ready. This time was different. He never looked at me the way he did today.
A look of pure betrayal.
John B had gone MIA with Sarah while Pope and Kie were handling everything we needed to look for the gold. Me? I was trying to find a way to cope with the sudden JJ sized gap in my life.
It was brutal trying to get through the entire day without collapsing. Everything felt dull. I decided going home and hiding out in my room was the only option. It spared me the looks of concern from our friends and gave me the freedom to cry.
My room felt abnormally empty and cold. My stomach rolled as JJ’s words played in a brutal loop. I crawled into my bed where I curled into myself tightly, hugging my knees to my chest to create some type of pressure.
He’ll come back. He always comes back.
I jolted awake to pounding on my window.
“-wake up. He needs you. It’s bad oh my god it’s really bad.”
Scrambling off the bed, I pushed the curtains aside to see Kie’s panicked face. “Kie, what’s going on?”
Her face filled with relief as she pulled me into her. “We need to get to the chateau now. He’s not making any sense and bought all of this stuff.”
Nausea rolled in my stomach.
“JJ-“
She cuts me off. “He needs you.”
I left the house in seconds, hopped into the Hayward truck and we took off. I nibbled on my nails, glancing at Kiara in the drivers seat. Her face was painted with worry and her leg bopped up and down displaying her nervous energy.
Kie moved one hand from the steering wheel and threaded our hands together, squeezing tightly.
Pulling up to the chateau, I see LED lights tangled up on the trees, shining lights reflecting on the yard. How was there power? The hurricane had taken everything out.
Before I could figure it out, I heard a commotion that drifted up the drive way.
“Where is she? You said Kie was getting her.”
My heart jumped to my throat. I hold onto Kiara tighter as we move toward the raised voices.
Something twisted in my chest as I took in the hot tub and lights suddenly decorating John B’s yard.
JJ is shouting at Pope now, slurring his words slightly, before taking a pull of the champagne he clutched in his hand.
“Look man, she’s here. She’s here, JJ. Calm down.” Pope announced, pointing in our direction, before placing his hands around his head and taking a deep breath.
Awareness ran through me. JJ turned his body to face me, his gaze flicked to mine.
He said nothing yet his eyes said everything. There was an openness that seemed to make him vulnerable.
“You came.”
A tug deep in my chest urged me to move closer. “You asked.”
“Okay, now that she’s here. What did you do, JJ? Where did all this come from?” Pope asked, but we all knew the answer.
“I got a jet going straight in my butt right now. Y’all should get in immediately, ya hear?” JJ laughed, the aviator sunglasses slipping down slightly. His blonde hair slick with water stuck to his forehead as he messily poured champagne into a glass. “Salud!”
Pope let out a noise of disbelief, “How much did this cost?”
“Uh, pretty much all of it.”
I moved around, taking in the inflatable floaties that filled up the yard, while biting the inside of my cheek. He spent all of the money.
“Kie, what? Can’t a man have a little luxury in life?”
I tuned out their arguing. There was a reason he acted out and bought all of this pointless shit but I couldn’t figure out what it was. He knew. He knew he needed to pay for restitution.
A blanket of dread covered my body like an old blanket as the consequences of JJ’s actions finally settled in. Another sense of dread hit when I knew I wouldn’t leave him.
“You could have paid for restitution or better yet, helped us buy supplies.” Pope said, shaking his head in clear frustration.
They weren’t seeing this for what it was. Something was wrong. Yes, he was reckless and rash but like I said before, most of the time he does those things because something happened.
“Okay Pope. Well, I didn’t do that. I got a hot tub for my friends,” JJ choked out, “I got a hot tub for my friends. Screw that, I got a hot tub for my family.”
“JJ, what the hell?” Kie whispered.
Something in her voice made me turn back around quickly and that’s when I saw it.
JJ stood at the center of the hot tub, one hand clutching the champagne bottle while the other hung loosely at his side. His gold necklace moving back and forth shining under the lights, but that’s not what caught my eye.
What caught my eye was the purple and blue bruises that littered his chest and ribs. A high pitched ringing filled my ears as my body felt like it began to float.
This. This was the reason he spent all the money.
My hand covers my mouth as I let out a choked sound.
Hearing the noise, JJ turns to me, his face entirely shattered, tears causing the crystal blue orbs to shine.
“Do you see what I did? Look what I did for you,” He cried out as he held out his arms, staring at me with such vulnerability I could feel my knees start to buckle.
Tears freely began to fall from my face as I took inventory of just how many bruises covered his body.
“No, stop being so emotional. It’s fine, everything’s fine.”
My feet moved on their own accord. Fully dressed, I threw one leg over then the other ignoring the burning from the heat of the water.
He reached for me the moment my body hit the water just as my arms circled around his neck. JJ curled his body into me, the champagne bottle forgotten, his arms circling around my waist digging into my lower back, clutching me like a life line.
My legs knocked together as the adrenaline and helplessness kicked in. I began counting in my head my breaths because I knew in this moment, I couldn’t afford to break down.
Not when he was broken beyond belief.
My fingers threaded themselves into his sun-kissed locks, brushing from the nape of his neck to the top of his head and back again. I pressed my lips onto his head, not letting my grip loosen for one second.
“I love you.” I murmured over and over again as sobs wracked his body, his head in my chest soaking my shirt with his tears. “I got you, it’s okay. I’m here, Jayj.”
I glanced up helplessly and see Pope and Kie staring at us, both of them clearly distraught.
I beckon them over with a nod in my head and instantly JJ and I are covered in warmth. Their arms wrapping around us both, whispering words of love to him.
We stayed like that until our skin got pruny, not wanting to move until he was ready.
When the time did come, I could tell by the way his grip on my waist loosened and his sobs quieted down. Brushing the hair out of his face, I brought my face close to his, “You ready to get out now?”
JJ nodded.
“Kie, can you set out some of John b’s clothes?” I asked her, moving to get out. She nodded and pope followed her inside.
JJ followed closely behind me. His fingers laced with mine, trembling slightly as the night air bit at our soaked bodies.
Shuffling into the chateau, our friends were sprawled out on the couch with Kie strumming away at the ukulele.
“I left the clothes in the spare.” Pope said, his eyes locked on JJ.
I shot him a thankful smile, “Thanks, Pope.”
Once we were in the room, I shut the door as JJ shimmed out of his shorts. Ignoring the heat in my cheeks, I grabbed the towel from the bed and began to dry him.
I could feel his intense gaze on my face the entire time. Biting back a smile, I whispered, “Can I tell you something?”
“Please.”
“I really like the hot tub.”
JJ tilted his head back and let out a surprised laugh. The sound of his familiar laugh caused a wave of warmth to crash over me, causing a zoo of butterflies to swarm my stomach.
“It is a pretty sick tub, isn’t it?” He smiled.
“It is. Very kooky of you.”
He narrowed his red rimmed eyes at me, “Take that back.”
I couldn’t have his my grin even if I tried.
“JJ the kook? I could see that.”
He sends me a cheeky smile in return. Bringing my attention back to the task at hand, I drag the towel along his shoulders before heading towards his chest. My hand stalled slightly as I saw how angry the bruises were, the hue of the purple and blue causing my stomach to churn.
My head moved carefully as I pressed my lips softly along each bruise, fluttering my eyes shut. I feel familiar rough hands tangling themselves in my hair and he lets out a sharp breath.
Opening my eyes, he tilted my head back with his fingers gripped the nape of my neck. A storm brewed in the crystal blue eyes, flicking between every emotion.
His thumb slowly drew my bottom lip down causing his eyes to darken with each passing second,” Thank you.”
Tremors wracked my body at how close we were, our breaths intertwined filtering into my bloodstream.
JJ shifted forward allowing his lips to softly brush mine. The moment my lips parted, he pressed his again almost like he was inhaling my every breath.
Pulling back, he rested his forehead on mine and repeated, “Thank you.”
“I got you. I’ll let you change-“ My words got cut off as he grabbed my arm to stop me in my tracks.
“Stay.”
And so I did.
_______________
I blinked at the alarm clock that read 3 a.m and slowly rubbed the sleepiness from my eyes. I could hear the sound of the skeeters buzzing outside the chateau and felt a strange sense of calm at the quiet.
Reaching toward the other side of the bed , my hands were met with empty cold sheets. He was gone.
I closed my eyes tightly and took in a deep breath as I willed for this nightmare to go away. We still had a lot to work through, but I thought after last night, he finally understood how fucking in deep I was. I was all in, completely and utterly in love with him. It’s always been him.
Pushing my body up, I slowly bring the sheet up to my chest covering my naked body from the cold. A sharp tinge of fear hit my chest as I noticed a presence at the end of the bed that was quickly replaced with an immense sense of relief.
JJ sat on the edge of the bed with his bare back facing me, his elbows on his knees, and head in his hands. A small smile played my lips as I shuffled over, my hands slowly trailing themselves over his shoulders and pressed my lips softly against his shoulder blade.
“Can’t sleep?”
His shoulders tensed the minute my lips touched his body. “I didn’t think you’d still be here.”
Confusion filled every fiber of my being as I finally took him in. I could feel the weak stitches that held my heart together suddenly begin to tear.
I opened my mouth and closed it. The backs of my eyes burned as I stared at the side of his face, the face that I spent hours admiring, that refused to even look at me.
“I thought after last night-“
JJ shook his head in disgust and let out a dry breath, roughly tugging at the messy strands on his head.
“We fucked. It’s not like that’s something we’ve never done before. It doesn’t change anything.”
Like I said before, I understand him. I know him and I know exactly what he’s doing. That doesn’t stop every part of me from feeling like I had just gotten kicked in the chest.
“JJ, please don’t do this.” I inhaled a shaky breath as I clutched the sheer tighter to my chest, almost like it was an armor against his cruel words, words that I knew came from a place of panic. Yet, it hurt just the same.
“Do what,” JJ said, getting up from the bed to face me, arms crossed tightly against his chest. “You made it clear what side you were on and it wasn’t mine.”
“Stop twisting what happened. You forget that I know you, JJ. I know you,” I stood on my shaky feet, the sheets wrapped around my body. “You think I dont know why your treating me this way. You’re dad doesn’t decide who you are.”
Desperation burned in my blood as I once again tried to grasp at straws. He was always finding excuses to run from me and each and every time, JJ took a piece of me with him.
“Shut up. I’m not doing this shit with you.”
“You have no idea how special you are do you? How easy you are to love?” It was an honest question, one that seemed to anger him if the clenching of his fists was any indication.
“Stop-“
I cut him off. “Because you are. Special, I mean.”
JJ said nothing. His gaze met mine, and the blue eyes I thought matched the ocean perfectly, showed a battle of emotions.
I took the opportunity to move closer to him, fighting the urge to curl up and cry at the look of utter confusion on his face.
Luke had successfully beat it into him that he was worthless, useless, and would never amount to anything. This, this look on his face was why I stayed.
He didn’t know. He really didn’t know the effect he had on people, on me.
My fingers trembled slightly as I reached to touch the bracelets that decorated his wrist. All of them being gifts from me.
“You’re fiercely loyal to the people you love. The family that you chose for yourself. It’s almost frustrating how you don’t see it,” I muttered, tilting my head up to search his eyes. “I mean, fuck JJ, you took the fall for Pope because you didn’t want his future to be ruined. You went to jail and now you’re on probation.”
“Please, stop.” His plead was weak at best.
My fingers danced along his jaw, my voice wavering slightly at the tightness in my chest. “You sat with my everyday during summer school so I wouldn’t be myself. No one does that, JJ. Especially not here.”
He had to know I was telling the truth.
“So please, listen to me when I tell you that loving you has been the easy thing I’ve ever done.”
Despite the immense beating my poor heart has taken, it still beats with a naive sense of hope.
Hope that sky rocketed when JJ reached forward to twirl a strand of my hair in between his fingers, almost as though he was memorizing how it felt.
“Such pretty little words.” He hummed. “How many other guys have you told that too?”
I recoiled back in shock.
“Pretty little words won’t get you anywhere. You wanna fuck, I’m down. But that’s not gonna stop me from mackin’ on other chicks.”
Then he dropped the strand of my hair, along with every hope that he could love me.
I chose to then focus on my anger that slowly began to bubble to the surface.
“Like who? Your gonna start mackin’ on Kie?” I launched the question at him, my voice raising an octave in disbelief.
“Maybe. At least she knows when to leave.”
“Stop talking to me like that,” My voice broke at the end, the burning in my eyes getting too hard to ignore. “You’re hurting me.”
All I could do was stare.
Here I stood, heart bleeding, begging a broken boy to love me back. And maybe that wasn’t fair for me to ask, maybe it was too much but a large part of me thought he felt something. Even if it was a fraction of what I felt for him because at least it was something.
Anything.
“You’re never going to let me love you, are you?” I ignored the sharp stab in my stomach as I finally said the question I already knew the answer to.
JJ’s head snapped up in shock at my question. “I never asked for you to love me.”
“You showed up to my window every night because you didn’t want to go home. You hold my hand, you kiss me, you fuck me. You come to me when you can’t fucking sleep. You sleep in my bed. You teach me to surf and take me everywhere with you. You ask for my advice and god forbid I don’t answer the phone, you have a melt down.” I was shouting at that point, my voice loud enough to wake up our friends who were sleeping in the living room but I couldn’t bring myself to care.
“You need me, I’m there. You got arrested, I bail you out. You get in a fight, I clean you up. JJ, you showed up in my life and surrounded me. You’re fucking everywhere. How could you not expect me to fall in love with you when you do these things?”
The laugh I let out was one of a broken girl, one who had completely lost herself in a wave of chaos known as JJ Maybank.
The door was right there. And yet, I couldn't get my feet to move.
“Because I don’t fucking understand it, okay? Because I’ve never had the luxury of someone looking at me the way you do and it makes me physically fucking sick.” JJ took several strides until he was pressed up firmly against me, his fingers threading themselves into the nape of my neck.
“The way you look at me makes me feel like I’m suffocating, don’t you get that? And yet, I can’t fucking thinking straight when you’re not by me.” He choked out, his face was white with panic.
I could feel myself start to crumble at his words. Welcome to the club. “Yesterday, you said I wasn't enough for you.”
JJ nodded, his eyes staring straight into me with such intensity I had to swallow.
“You know why I said it. You know how I get. The way you look at me,” He swears pounding his hand against the wall,” Fuck the way you look at me. You make me feel like I can be a better person, that I have the potential to do something great.”
“Because you can-“
“No I fucking can’t. You give me this hope that I can be better and then something happens to remind me that I can’t and it crushes me. It fucking wrecks me.”
I roughly wiped the tears that blurred my vision and asked, “So what are you saying?”
The silence caused the anticipation of his answer to intensify, making breathing almost impossible.
“Sometimes, being with you is the hardest thing I’ve ever done.”
Can you hear that? It’s the sound of my heart shattering for the last time.
“Then you have to let me go.”
He shook his head,”Thats not what I want.”
“Let me go, JJ. If not for you, then for me because loving you is the easiest thing I’ve ever done. You haven’t even been able to say it back. You completely own me, every thought I have is about you.”
“You own ME.” JJ shouted, his hands in his hair tugging it in anger. “And it completely terrifies me and then I say the first thing I can to make the fear go away just so I can get a moment of peace. I don’t want to feel like this anymore.”
In a way, I couldn’t really be angry with him.
No one’s every really described just how dangerous loving someone can be. How they consume every part of you until there’s nothing left. Until suddenly, you can only breathe when you’re around them. When your very mood depends on the expression of their face. The pure feeling of ecstasy that covers your body in a layer of electricity the moment you’re around them and they look at you.
“You love me,” At my words, JJ looked almost relieved, like he finally understood why he felt so many things at once,” but you can’t let yourself love me.”
And yet, despite this revelation, I still couldn’t bring myself to leave.
A tortured look passed his face as he pressed his back against the wall and slowly slid down.
“You need to let me go because I love you to the point that I cant bring myself to leave. So if you don’t want me, if you can’t be with me then do this for me. If you don’t, I’m going to keep giving you every piece of me until there’s nothing left. “
I guess you never truly understand until it happens. Until you get physically ill when they’re upset or filled with warmth when you see them tilt their head back and laugh. When you see them and suddenly the world is just a little less overwhelming, bearable even.
When every fiber of your being is tuned into one person.
Gripping the sheet tighter, I moved in between his legs and settle myself on the floor. The moment I did, JJ engulfed me in his embrace. His presence soaked through my skin leaving the intoxicated feeling in its wake.
“I can’t,” He shook his head fervently, “ I can’t do that.”
I understood him, because I couldn’t either.
“What are we going to do, Jayj?”
JJ pressed his face against my throat, “I don’t know.”
We weren’t okay, it didn’t take a genius to figure it out. Nothing had been solved and yet, we sat on the floor wrapped in each others embrace.
So I said the only thing I knew to be true and give him yet another piece of me, “I love you.”
“I know.”
There we were. Two souls irrevocably intertwined in a mass of love and hate that were broken beyond recognition. Neither of us being able to leave the other.
And yet, all I could focus on was his inability to say he loved me back.
_____________________
Tags for all those who requested: @trickylittlewitch @maybankslover @bcon24 @chaoticbisous @ifilwtmfc @dullsocietyy @mad-die45 @stuffyownswrld @kaylinfayezink @theywantedplayer
#jj maybank#jj maybank fanfiction#jj maybank x reader#jj maybank smut#jj maybank angst#rudy pankow#rudy pankow smut#obx#obx smut#obx fanfiction#outer banks#outer banks fanfiction#outerbanks imagine#jj maybank imagine#outer banks smut#jj maybank masterlist#obx3#outerbanks imagines
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PART 4 | AFTER FIVE YEARS
Pairing: Carlos Sainz x Reader
Summary: Carlos Sainz finally met his son he had with her ex-wife, Y/N.
Warning: Angsty
AN: A little backstory about YN , a flashback from five years ago. Thank you guys. I appreciate all your comments. Let me know your reaction and if you wanna be added to the tag list. Love y'all!
It's done. You are now divorced. You are no longer Mrs. Sainz. You are sitting on the bed feeling empty, looking at the bedroom floor.
So what now?
You grabbed your phone on your side table and dialed your Mom's number. It took a few rings before your Mom picked it up.
“Mom, I'm going home.” Your mom didn’t say anything and hope you have a safe flight.
You didn’t wait for a second and immediately grabbed your luggage. You gently fold all your clothes and stuff them into your bag. You then went to the bathroom to grab your skin care products and other toiletries. After making sure that all your things are complete, you zipped and sealed your luggages. You saw the gold commitment in your ring finger and a shiny diamond one you got when you said yes.
“You two are way more expensive than filing a divorce,” You whispered and scoffed at yourself. You removed your necklace, then your rings, and made them as a pedant.
“Maybe, I can take you to an auction. Engagement and wedding ring from Carlos Sainz.” You let out a painful laugh before putting the necklace in your bag. Your finger feels strange without them, after wearing them for almost three years.
You put on the most casual outfit you can grab, a black trousers, white shirt, and a black cap. You also put on a face mask to hide your face. You don’t want any paparazzi following you at the airport. You just want to leave in peace and make a simple statement of your break up. Being questioned about what happened and explaining everything is the least thing that you wanna do. It feels like squeezing lime on your opened cut.
You arrived at the airport earlier than your scheduled flight. Gladly, there are only a few people in the vicinity. You sat down in the waiting area and unlocked your phone. You deleted Carlos' phone number and even blocked him in all of your social media accounts. Painful for you but you also deleted any contacts of his family, his father, mother, and even his siblings. You also unfollowed anything related to Formula 1. But you didn’t unfollow some of the drivers that you are close with.
After almost a day flight, you finally arrived. It feels great to be back in your home country. Your mom fetched you at the airport. She initiated some small talks on your way home but didn’t dare to mention anything about your divorce. She wants you, yourself to open up about it if you are comfortable to talk about the whole situation.
You proceed to your old room after getting out of the car. You and your mom brought your luggages in your room and began unpacking them. You opened your closet and saw your white coat hanging. It has your name with MD on it. “Emergency Medicine,” you whispered as you read what's on your coat. Warm tears started falling from your eyes.
“What did I do wrong, Mom? I gave up my career for him. I let this go to be with him. I chose another path of my life and tried to settle down, followed him to the other side of the world. How could he do this to me?” Your mom looked at you and stopped unpacking your bags. She is disheartened, staring at you sitting on the floor, hugging your knees. It is her first time seeing you cry and break down after everything that happened. She is actually worried about you as you didn’t show any tears when Carlos filed the divorcement papers, when you found out about your baby, and after everything. It’s like your emotions shut down. You were just filled with mixed feelings and couldn’t even process it as everything happened so fast.
She walks towards you and sits beside you. She didn't say anything, she knows that words are not what you need right now. You need ears, who can listen to you.
“I hate myself, Mom. I let myself be fooled by a man and I'm now fucking pregnant with his child. He doesn't even know, I'm having his own blood and genes. And I don't even know where to start with my life again. I have nothing left, Mom. I am such a mess,”
She can feel how broken you are. She hates seeing you cry and hate yourself for something you are not the one to blame.
“I sold all my properties in Madrid, even the coffee shop Mom. I can't go back there. I can't be in his hometown. I can't even bear the thought of breathing the same air he breathes. I can't Mom, I don't wanna.” Your voice is broken and so you are. Your words are nearly inaudible and your face is filled with glistening tears which can't seem to stop pouring. Your sorrow left you having difficulty catching your breath.
“He knows how cheating and lying was my last straw. He always knew that. He knows about Dad, what he did and how he left us, Mom. Why did he have to repeat the same history as he did? Why do I have to go through this again? Why do I keep catching men in my life kissing another woman? How can they put me in this position?” You are on the verge of hyperventilating from crying. Hence, your mom gently held your arms and made you face her eyes.
“Baby, look at me. Breathe, my love,” She started exhaling and inhaling with you to calm your nerves down and control the pace of your breathing.
“Mom, I don't know what to do. What should I do?” You asked her while she was wiping the tears on your cheeks.
“You don't have to do anything, my love. You don't need to know what you should do at the very moment. I just want you to take care of yourself. Just have a meal, take a shower, and rest. Mommy got you, okay? I always do.”
She pulled you into her arms to give you a safe space to cry. Her words gave you an inner peace, a reminder to take it slow. You don't need to know what the future holds for now.
“And stop saying you have nothing left. You have me, honey. You have this,” your mom said before putting her warm hand on your belly.
I have Cael. When I thought I had nothing left, I had him. He is the only one I can call my own.
YN'S Private Instagram Post
"my sunshine Sebastian Cael Sainz"
TAGLIST:
@seasonswinter @charizznorizz @itsjustkhaos @celesteablack @openthenyoor01 @carlossainzbelongswithme @timmychalametsstuff @viennakarma @charlottef1 @i-love-ptv @evie-119 @somepeoplemaybe @amberpanda99 @gotthatname @karlossainz @wonderfulkawaii @khaylin27 @hc-dutch @avengers-assemble123456 @likedbygaslyy @xoscar03 @yukiotadako @barcelonaloverf1life @bearryyy @mahii7 @mxdi0 @heyheyheyggg @sunny44 @casperlikej @ironmaiden1313 @biitch-with-wifi @elia-the-bibliophile @nataliazzzz @bernelflo @madkohi @lillunna @loloekie @jinimon-tr @glai1023-blog @not-nyasa @jolixtreesunn @changetyre @thatsusbitch @distancedss @miarabanana @iawfwm @f1fanatic55 @taniamndez @voidsfics @jasminesacademia @ahahvalerie @a-beaverhausen @glow-ish @ccallistata
AN: Should YN put the necklace in an auction? Just kidding. Please unhide your accounts guys, I can't tag you if its hidden huhu. Thank youuuu!
next part
#carlos sainz#carlos sainz x you#carlos sainz x y/n#carlos sainz x reader#formula one x you#formula 1 x reader#f1 x you#f1 x reader#f1 imagines#afterfiveyears
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Driver's License (Matt Sturniolo)
request:
a/n: anon i love you so much, both of your ideas were so good. i hope you love this. i cut off the second part to gatekeep it till it comes out 💕 also ik in the song, it is the boys fault but i've done a few of those so I wanted this one to be on the reader.
contains: angst, fluff, breakup to makeup, abandonment issues, happy ending, kissing, cussing, 1.3k words
Three Months Ago:
“Okay, whoa. Don’t hit the break that hard. Ease on to it.” Matt says quickly, leaning forward a bit. I roll my eyes at his dramatics. “I barely pressed it, Matt.” I continue circling the parking lot slowly since he refuses to let me go over 5 miles per hour.
When a car enters the parking lot near me, I tense up but Matt jumps in. “You got it. You’re fine. They’re just gonna pass you.” He says, calmly, his hand resting near the steering wheel, just in case he needs to grab it. The car passes me and I relax, smiling over at Matt. “See.” He says, giving me a small smile back but then gesturing back out the window. “Look at the road, babe. Not me.” I snap my eyes away and focus back in.
“Pull into this one right here.” He gestures at a spot a couple of feet away and I turn into it, barely in the lines, and put the car in park. I wince and glance over at him, expecting him to talk shit, but he just smiles. “Not bad, baby. You wanna try to get on the street?” My eyes widen and he laughs and takes off his seatbelt.
“It’s okay. Next time.” He leans over and presses two kisses to my lips before opening his door so we can trade back. He comes around the car and opens the driver’s door, leaning in. “You’re gonna be coming through to pick me up in a second. Just wait.”
*********
I look down at the floor of the DMV and shake my head, trying and failing to push down my thoughts of Matt. Today is probably the hardest day without him I've had since we first broke up two months ago. Two months since I made one of the biggest mistakes of my life and didn’t even have the strength to try and fix it. Every time I think about the look in Matt’s eyes when I told him we were done, I want to crumble. So instead, I try not to think about it at all.
The attendant calls my name sharply and it snaps me out of my impending pity party. I quickly scramble over and take my license from her, muttering a quiet thank you. As I head back to my car, I can’t take my eyes off it. I always thought this moment would be so much bigger but it just feels empty now.
When I get in my car, I drum my fingers on the steering wheel for a second trying to clear my head. I squeeze my eyes shut trying to muster up something resembling self-respect before my heart wins out and I pull out my phone. This is a bad idea. I know it and repeat it to myself as I type Matt’s name into my Instagram search bar.
This has been a hard limit I set with myself, alongside not texting him or his brothers. I don’t stalk his Instagram like some psycho ex. Except apparently, I do today. And god, he looks good. His hair is longer than the last time I saw him, the ends curling up slightly. In his most recent post, he’s got a slight smile as he looks up at the camera but it’s the glint of something around his neck that makes my breath hitch. I scroll to his next post and zoom in to confirm it’s what I think it is and my eyes begin to water. He’s still wearing the necklace I got him on our first Valentine’s Day.
I close my phone and pull down my sun visor, staring into the mirror. Does it mean he still loves me? Do I still have a chance? Or does he just really like that necklace? I shake my head and push the visor up, throwing the car into reverse. It doesn’t matter. If there’s even still a fraction of a chance, I have to try.
*********
This was a mistake. I’m an absolute freak. I’m a loser. Why would I drive to this man’s house like everything’s fine? I put my head in my hands and count to three trying to calm down. I’ve been sitting outside of the triplet’s house for two minutes trying to get my nerve back but with every passing second I feel stupider.
Okay, it’s fine. This is fine. Before I can talk myself out of it anymore, I get out of my car and march up to their door. I knock twice, deciding that if they don’t answer in ten seconds I can run back to my car and pretend this never happened. I get all the way to eight before Chris swings the door open. We stare at each other blankly for a couple of breaths before Chris turns and calls for Matt to come down. He turns back to me, hardening his eyes. But he must see something in my face that makes him take pity because he just sighs before leaning in and whispering a low, “Don’t fuck this up, kid.”
As soon as Matt starts down the stairs, Chris turns and rushes back up, tapping a hand on his brother’s shoulder when he passes him. When he sees me in the doorway, Matt freezes momentarily, recovering quickly and setting his jaw. I take an involuntary step backward at the icy look he gives me as he leans against the door frame.
“Can I help you?” He asks. His voice has way less steel than I expected but the question still guts me. It feels like I’m standing in front of a stranger and not the boy who used to hold me every night.
“I just-” I start, biting down on my bottom lip as I try not to cry. “I got my driver’s license today,” I say lamely. I cringe slightly and he furrows his brow in confusion.
“Okay?”
“I just wanted to tell you that, I guess.”
“Alright. Thanks for the headline.” He says sarcastically.
“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have come here.” I say, turning to retreat.
“That’s what you’re sorry for?” He demands, clearly angry now. “You’re not sorry for leaving me out of nowhere? For never answering a single one of my messages? For breaking my fucking heart?”
I swallow thickly and nod, stepping closer. “Matt. I’m sorry for all of that. I’m so sorry I hurt you. I promise you that was never my intention. I was just scared.” He laughs bitterly at that and shakes his head.
“No. You don’t get to use that excuse. Everybody’s scared. I was scared. You don’t get to just run when shit gets real.” His voice cracks a bit at the end and he runs his hand over his face. I reach out tentatively and place my hand on his arm. He locks eyes with me at the touch but doesn’t immediately snatch away.
“I wish I could take it back. I wish every day that I had just talked to you. And I understand if you can’t forgive me for that, Matt. I don’t know if I would either. But, I promise if you can, I’ll spend the rest of our lives proving that I’m all in.” His eyes search mine desperately for truth and I hold my breath waiting for his response.
“Tell me that you love me.” He says, quietly.
My heart jumps as fear floods my body. I’ve never said it out loud before. I exhale deeply, letting my eyes trail over his face. “I love you, Matt.” My voice is a little wobbly but I pour as much honesty as I can into those words, hoping he hears what he needs.
He nods, his serious demeanor still in place, and sticks out his pinky finger. I laugh wryly and lock our pinkies, sealing the promise.
Matt pulls me inside of the house and takes my face in his hands, kissing me so intensely that my body leans sideways. He pulls away, pressing another one to my lips quickly and then drawing me into his arms. I wrap myself around his waist, feeling like the weight of the world has been lifted.
“I missed you so much.” Matt’s voice grates against my ear as he kisses behind it. I slip my hands under his shirt before I pull back to look at his face and grin.
“Enough to finally let me drive you on the interstate?” I say hopefully.
“Absolutely fucking not-”
#sturniolo triplets#matt sturniolo#christopher sturniolo#chris sturniolo x reader#nick sturniolo#sturniolo fluff#matt sturniolo x reader#chris sturniolo oneshot#matt sturniolo oneshots#chris sturniolo fluff#matt sturniolo angst#matt sturniolo x you#matt sturniolo fluff#matthew sturniolo#chris sturniolo x you#chris sturniolo#nicolas sturniolo#sturniolo fanfic#sturniolo x reader#maggie b writes
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I used to send you lots of requests before, but haven't sent you requests for a long time for exams, really missed it babe:) Can I ask for a Steve x reader kbd where our favourite Bethie catches reader at night staying up to do work, but we know how silent she is, so probably she doesn't tell reader about it? I just really wanna see one where reader overworks herself which not even Steve knows, but Beth finds out, really wanna see how her point of view changes on her mother. Hope this makes sense. Love you lots, Jade, and your pretty little kbd universe:)
love you !!!!!!! kbd — beth and dad!steve catch you working late at night, mom!reader. 1.4k
The day Steve takes the baby gates down is the best day of Bethie’s life. They’ve been up and down and up again, but now Dove is old enough to manage the stairs by herself without danger (just about) and Wren won’t be able to crawl for months, they’re back in the basement.
Bethie can go downstairs whenever she wants. She doesn’t have to wait for Avery’s help on the funny top latch.
She can tell already that Steve is sleeping, your bedroom door open, her father curled on his side with his hand stretched out across the empty side where you’d usually be snoring. The baby bassinet by Steve’s side has its own soft snoring, baby Wren fast asleep too.
Beth has to find you, then. The bathroom door is closed (though she’s now allowed in there at night on account of needing to pee and her promise not to touch the washing machine again). Avery’s door is ajar, but when Bethie peeks inside, you’re not there either. Dove is half hanging off her toddler bed and you’re not there scooping her up, so where are you?
Beth’s getting spooked, until she hears the sound of paper being shuffled downstairs.
She holds the rungs of the stair bannister and sneaks carefully. Through the hallway and into the kitchen, she finds you at the dinner table with a frown on your lips so similar to her own. She loves looking like her mommy, even if the rest of her sisters look more like Steve.
You’re working, she thinks. She’s not sure. It looks like you are. On rare occasions you’ve needed to finish things after dinner and her dad corrals them into the living room for TV, Beth has seen you crowded at the table with a pen and a weary expression. It can’t be much fun, work.
She isn’t sure how long she watches you. A weird feeling gathers in her chest, and she thinks about speaking up. You look upset at times. You bite your bottom lip like Avery does when she’s sad.
It’s one of the first times Bethie's really looked at you and worried you weren’t happy.
She doesn’t know why she goes back upstairs. She’s a bit scared, perhaps, to see you that way, without Steve by your side.
He’s still sleeping, arm still looking for you in the dark. Bethie climbs up into bed with him and pushes her way under his arm, to which she is immediately pulled into his chest, squished and too warm.
“Avery?” he mumbles. Then, a moment later. “No, that’s my Beth.” He peels one eye open, a smile taking slow form on his lips. “What’s wrong, babe?”
“Mommy’s downstairs.”
He peers past her head. “Oh. What for?”
“Don’t know. She looks sad.”
“You think so?” He blinks. Bethie thinks her dad is the most love they can put into one person besides you, and she doesn’t usually look at him and see handsome or tired or anything, she just sees dad. Right now, though, he looks befuzzled. “Should we go see?”
“Um. Well…”
He kisses her forehead. “You tired, baby? You can sleep here if you want. Let me just go see if mommy’s okay. Go to sleep, okay? I’ll be back in a minute.” He kisses her cheek. “It’s okay, baby. Just sleep. It’s so late.”
Steve tucks her in. She doesn’t look very tired, but she closes her eyes obligingly.
Steve doesn’t know what you’re doing out of bed. He hadn’t felt you go. The only times he can remember you getting up in the middle of the night would be with pregnancy cravings, and you definitely aren’t pregnant, Wren’s still too small to support her own head. Plus, Steve’s sure he would’ve guessed. He knows you pretty well by now.
You hear him coming down the stairs but you aren’t quick enough putting your things away to hide that you’re working. “What are you doing?” he asks, his voice rough. “It’s one in the morning.”
“I couldn’t sleep,” you lie, “figured I’d get this done.”
Steve leans on the doorway and crosses his arms over his chest. “Really?”
“Yeah, really.”
You’re still lying.
“I think Beth is upset,” he suggests.
“What for?”
“She’s been down here. You didn’t hear her?”
You flatten your pile of papers unhappily. “No, do I ever? She’s my mouse.”
Steve abandons his interrogative pose to hug you. It hadn’t been working, anyways. He put his arm behind your neck and rests his cheek against your temple, the other arm across your chest, your elbow clutched in his hand. “Do you do this a lot?” he asks quietly.
“Not much.”
“Let me take you to bed,” he says.
“Yeah, I just have to finish this.”
“Wasn’t a question. Bed, now.” He rubs your arm. “Please.”
Steve’s looked out for you since he met you, of course, but you’re the first person who taught him what it was like to be intrinsically taken care of, and he’s tried to pay that back for the last eight years. It’s hard to explain the incredible value of love, because it’s without transaction, completely paradoxical. He can’t pay it back. There’s nothing to be paid. But he can help you up the stairs, and he can worry for your sake about work and why you’re doing it in the middle of the night.
“You need to sleep, babe, I mean it,” he says quietly, not wanting to disturb the other sleeping girls as you crest the last stairs onto the landing.
“I know. I’ll sleep. I’m sleeping.”
He pinches your sides from behind.
“I love you,” he says, stopping you before you can get to the bedroom door. “Please don’t stay up late. We’ll make you more time if you need it in the daytime. I’ll make it for you.”
You accept his promise and his kiss with a gluey smile. “Okay, H. No more staying up. I got it.” You drop your forehead to his shoulder quickly. “Thanks.”
“Yeah. Well, go ahead, there’s a Beth in need of scrunching on your side of the bed.” And he needs to pass out.
Steve crashes into his own side of the bed, and he gives Beth a good kiss, and then suddenly he’s sleeping before you’ve fully settled.
You slide down onto your back. Bethie breathes too softly to be sleeping, her head off of the pillows and the legs of her pyjama pants ridden up her calves where she’s kicked her legs out of the blankets.
“Bethie?” you whisper.
“Mommy.”
“Hey, sweet girl.” You peek at her. She’s peeking at you. “Daddy said you came downstairs. I wish you would’ve said hello.”
“You…” She eyes your sleeve. “Busy.”
“I’m never too busy for you if you need me. Are you okay? You don’t usually stay up this late.”
“You don’t, too.”
You slip your hand under her shoulders and lift her up onto the pillows. Careful, you pull the blanket from under her legs, smooth out her pants, and pull the blankets back over the both of you, enclosing you in a warm bubble. “Wanna cuddle with mommy?” you whisper.
“Will dad be lonely?”
“No, sweetheart. Are you lonely, sometimes, sleeping by yourself?”
“Sometimes.”
You might regret this, but Bethie’s your world. You hate thinking about her having such a horrible feeling and not telling you.
“If you’re ever lonely,” you begin gently, tracing the little remnants of your husband where they glow in the colour of her irises and her shy smile, “that’s what me and daddy are here for. If you’re lonely at bed time, you can come and cuddle with me. It doesn’t have to be all night long, just until the feeling goes away.”
“Are you lonely when you’re in the kitchen?” she asks.
Her whispers are sweet for how much effort she puts into them. Avery can’t whisper, not really, and Dove wouldn’t even try, but Bethie talks so quietly you strain to hear her under Steve’s harsher breathing.
“I’m never lonely when I have you and your sisters and your daddy in the house. Just knowing you’re upstairs makes me feel better.” You kiss the tip of her nose with a whispered ‘mwah’. “But I’m best when you’re right here.”
“I don’t want you to be lonely.” She grins at you, eyes fluttering, “I love you, mom.”
“I love you, too,” you whisper back.
She curls onto her side to lay her arm over you. You bring her in for your cuddle, your knuckles brushing Steve’s arm. “Should we go to sleep now?” she asks.
“Good idea, lovely girl.”
#kisses before dinner universe#stranger things x reader#stranger things fic#stranger things#steve harrington x y/n#steve harrington x reader#steve harrington#steve harrington imagine#steve harrington x you#steve harrington x fem!reader#dad!steve harrington#dad!steve harrington x reader#dad!steve harrington x mom!reader#steve harrington x afab!reader#afab!reader#mom!reader#steve harrington fanfiction#steve harrington fandom#steve harrington fanfic#steve harrington fic#stranger things fanfic#stranger things fanfiction#steve harrington fluff
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