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dyns33 · 3 months

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Family business

I still need to watch the show but I wanted to do a Alfie Solomons x reader. I'm sure all the characters are ooc, so sorry about that.

The good thing about being part of the Shelby family was that its members were very united because blood ties were sacred. The problem about being part of the Shelby family was the same thing.

Y/N often repeated it to herself, closing her eyes to keep her calm, while her brothers asked ridiculous or difficult things, considering that she didn't have the right to say no to them, just as they didn't have the right to tell her no either.

The fact that they didn't have the same mother didn't change anything. Their father may have been an asshole, but they were all Shelbys, united, hard-working, persevering, and here for each other.

They didn't often ask her things that would put her in danger. They were terribly protective of their little sisters, especially Arthur, but there were times when a feminine touch became essential to finalizing a deal or gaining someone's trust.

Almost no one knew that Y/N was a Shelby. Her mother had died when she was young and Polly had welcomed her into this strange world as soon as she learned that her idiot brother was her father. However, as soon as she was able to earn her own money, Y/N found a small place to live on her own, although she remained close to her family.

For Tommy, that made her perfect for a mission he'd had in mind for some time.

“I want you to become Alfie Solomons’ secretary.”

"Who ?" Y/N had asked, trying not to wince.

"It doesn't matter. He doesn't trust easily, but he's been having trouble managing his business for some time, too many unforeseen events, too many incompetent people. You are competent. Earn his trust, become indispensable, listen to his conversations, read his letters, and brings us all important information."

Y/N didn't know what important information was, even less so since she still didn't know who this Alfie Solomons was when she showed up at his office. Her brothers had decided that it was best for her not to know too much, not because she might be afraid, but because the man was very good at seeing through people. It wasn't very reassuring.

However, at first glance, Mr. Solomons did not seem that terrible. He showed a big smile when he saw Y/N, opening his arms and inviting her to come and sit down, offering her tea during their interview and listening attentively to everything she said. Despite his broken back, he insisted on walking her to the door, lowering her hand and declaring that he was delighted to have found his new secretary.

Two things quickly became quite clear after several weeks working with Alfie Solomons : he wasn't running a bakery at all, and he was perfectly charming.

Well, it happened that he shouted at certain employees, even hit them, and probably worse when there were no witnesses, but with Y/N, he was undoubtedly the most sweet and polite man. the sweetest in the world.

Even when she made mistakes, which didn't happen often, he would shrug his shoulders and say it was her fault, because he was asking a lot of her, before offering her a cup of tea and some biscuits.

Sometimes she would find flowers on her desk when she arrived in the morning.

“Slept well, love ?”

"Very well, Mr. Solomons, thank you. And you ?"

"Call me Alfie, love. And I haven't slept yet."

"Are you saying that so I don't wake you if I find you asleep again before a meeting, Mr. Solomons ?"

“I know you will do it no matter what, you cruel woman.”

When they didn't have too much work, they talked. Alfie Solomons had an opinion on everything, stories to tell, anecdotes or more or less strange questions on philosophical subjects as well as on perfectly futile or strange things. He often made her laugh, which seemed to please him.

On the contrary, he did not like it when another employee, client or business partner allowed themselves to be rude to his favorite secretary. It wasn't often, word had quickly spread about what Mr. Solomons did to those who misbehaved with Y/N.

For some, they were sleeping together. It didn't help that he often drove her home, even if it was only when it was very late, raining, or very cold.

Even though she promised them it wasn't true, her brothers were a little worried. They didn't like seeing Alfie hovering around their little sister like that, even if she brought them some interesting information thanks to her position.

It wasn't normal that she managed to have so much information, which worried them even more because Alfie Solomons really wasn't the type of man to take such a risk, so either he had discovered who she was and he was either giving Y/N wrong informationsn or he liked her so much he let her have everything.

The Shelby brothers didn't know which would be the worst. With all the information turning out to be true, they didn't know what to make of it.

Y/N didn't ask herself these kinds of questions, too busy with her work as a secretary, trying to keep her distance from her employer who was much too charming to be honest, and who was obviously not very appreciated by her family .

He sometimes asked her to marry him, but only as a joke, when she brought him a meal or when she forced him to put a pillow behind his back so that he wouldn't suffer the next day, or when She took care of his business perfectly.

Everything stopped after Arthur's beating.

The next day, Tommy called his sister to order her to leave. He was kind enough to apologize when he told her that she would probably have to move, but that she could always stay to Watery Lane with them while she found something, to make sure that Alfie wouldn't find her. Although he didn't see why he would look for her.

Solomons was disappointed to learn that his beloved secretary had to leave town for family reasons, but he seemed to understand, kissing her one last time on the hand and wishing her a good life.

“I guess it’s still a no for marriage ?”

"Mr. Solomons…"

"I know, I know, I'm just an old idiot. Take care, love. Shalom to your brothers and sisters."

Several months passed before this little sentence made sense to Y/N.

It hadn't shocked her, because the man talked too much for her to take in everything he said, it was only polite that he wished the best for his family, and she had been too busy not to show that their separation affected her.

Not seeming to see that she had become attached to the wandering Jew, Tommy did not warn her when it was decided to do business with him, against the Italians. He hadn't warned Arthur either, who wasn't happy to see Alfie again.

The meeting went well, from what Y/N understood. Alfie presented his "apologies" to Arthur, before agreeing to help him sort out their affairs with the Italians. He didn't ask for too much money, which surprised the brothers a little. He didn't hold them by the balls, it was the opportunity.

But no, he decided to be a gentleman, helping them in honor of old times. As he left, he only asked Tommy to greet his charming sister for him, winking.

The deal then no longer really mattered, because the Shelbys discovered something much more important. Solomons had discovered who he had hired as his secretary. He knew Y/N was one of them.

"… You're not serious. Thomas, you said it would be temporary."

"I know… I know ! Little sis, you have to understand that he is very dangerous. He is going to get revenge, he is going to hurt you and there is no way I am letting that happen."

“He won’t do anything to me.”

"It's business. He'll do it like he did to Arthur. You need to understand that you're not safe out there. Stay with us, stay home."

Y/N's worst nightmare was happening. Locked up with her family, without hope of independence or freedom. She should never have agreed to help Tom.

Unfortunately he seemed to be right, because she saw Ollie several times through the window, and other employees of the Bakery hanging around in the street. It was too risky to go out.

Then the flowers arrived. Deliveries of packages containing perfumes, books, tea. There was no need for him to sign them, but Alfie Solomons seemed to insist that the Shelbys understand that he knew full well where to find their sister.

Arthur wanted to kill him. John thought he needed to speak with this madman before it was too late. Tommy considered that just not bringing up the subject would make him calm down, too busy with other problems.

When the flu came, staying indoors protected no one. Ada brought the illness home and soon the most fragile members of the family were bedridden with fever.

A doctor came to examine them, to the surprise of the older brothers, who did not have enough money this month to pay for his services. He only said that they didn't need to worry about it, taking care of Finn, Ada, then Y/N, before going out without asking for a penny, leaving them with remedies and instructions.

The others' health improved quickly, but Y/N remained sick, shaking and sweating, sleeping for several hours before being awakened by nightmares, tired as if she hadn't slept for days.

One night, a hand on her damp forehead brought her out of her torpor. The hand remained still, only the thumb caressing her skin.

"You have to sleep, love. I brought tea, for your throat."

“Al… Alfie ?”

"Yes, love. Everything is fine, rest."

"It was you… who sent the doctor…"

"I wasn't going to let my favorite secretary die from a slight fever. Why isn't anyone at your bedside ? I don't like it, I'm going to have a word with your brothers."

Arthur and Tommy would undoubtedly have taken this as a threat, Solomons managing to enter their home and sneak up to their little sister's room without being seen, then being able to do her all the harm he wanted.

Y/N knew he wasn’t going to hurt her. It had been obvious for several weeks that he didn't intend to, with all these ridiculous gifts and letters, where he kept asking her if he wanted to marry her. He was having fun, nothing more. He continued to tease her, while scaring the Shelbys.

"It's not very nice." Y/N whispered, trying to keep her eyes open.

“It’s too easy to annoy them, it’s not my fault.”

“I wasn’t talking about that.”

"Ah. You see, love, I don't know what to do about it anymore. I did everything to make you see that I was serious, I who never seem serious. I knew it would be difficult at first, because you thought I didn't know who you were. I knew before I hired you. Then you left, I thought I was going to die, but I told myself that now that you weren't working for me anymore , if I said that I knew, then it would be easier. What should I do ? Buy a horse ? A trailer ? There is a gypso rite that I don't know to ask for the hand of a woman ? I have to go and see Arthur and duel him ? I can do it, he doesn't scare me, love. I can go right now."

"No… Stay with me…" she begged him, holding out her hand, coughing again.

Unable to not get agitated when he was speaking, Alfie Solomons had stood up to show that he would go to her brother's room to beat his face, but he immediately sat down next to Y/N, I took her hand which he kissed with all the tenderness he was capable of.

“Stay with me…” she repeated miserably.

"Yes, love, I'm here. I'm not going anywhere, I'm here."

And he was still there when she opened her eyes the next morning, holding her hand and smiling as her fever seemed to be going down. The moment was slightly ruined by Finn, who wanted to see if she was better and who screamed when he saw Solomons. Alfie yelled louder, even if it was to order the bellowing to stop because Y/N needed to rest.

This of course alerted the entire Shelby family, who ran into the room.

At first, Alfie refused to leave. He promised he would stay, so he would stay.

Then, seeing Y/N's pleading look who didn't want anyone to get hurt, he sighed as he agreed to follow the brothers into the kitchen, for a discussion, but only if he was allowed to come back to see her to say goodbye to her afterwards.

"If I didn't kill you first…"

"Oh, Arhur. Shalom ! Glad to see you haven't lost your humor !"

Ada stayed with her sister, helping her to drink, rubbing water on her forehead, and not being able to stop herself from asking her what had happened. Y/N reassuring her, explaining that Alfie had sent the doctor, that he wasn't dangerous, not at all.

Unlike the others, Ada did not take care of their brothers' less than legal affairs. She understood that this Solomons was not a good person, but neither of them were, and he seemed very attached to Y/N.

"And you ? What do you think of him ?"

"He's a fool."

"I see. You like him. Do you think Tommy would be alright with you dating ?"

"I'm afraid Alfie doesn't care about Thomas' approval." Y/N sighed, trying to hear if any screams were coming from downstairs. "He is very stubborn."

"I thought I noticed, with all these gifts. If he asks you to marry me, I want to be a bridesmaid."

“He’s asked me before, several times.”

“Damn, Y/N, Arthur is going to have a heart attack.”

Fortunately, the eldest did not have a heart attack, but he initially refused to believe Solomons' sincere feelings. The others were skeptical too. As she predicted, it didn't matter to Alfie, who only cared about her opinion.

He also pointed out that only Y/N had the right to order him to leave, by telling him that she never wanted to see him again. One word from her, and he wouldn't bother them anymore. But a yes, and he would be the happiest man in the world.

“With a beautiful family of fucking gypsos, but the happiest all the same.”

“She will never say yes to you !” John replied.

"Fucking hell, still speaking for her. Let's ask her. But not now, she still needs to recover. Leave her alone."

The brothers did not obey, waiting until the wandering Jew had kissed Y/N's hand and finally left to question her in turn, despite Ada's protests.

Only Tommy remained near the bedroom door, watching his sister in her bed. When their eyes met, he seemed to ask her a silent question, and she felt tears forming, unable to hide her answer.

He nodded, before whistling to tell everyone to get out. He said nothing, only smiling tenderly as he closed the door, leaving her alone with his blessing.

When Alfie Solomons would be back, with a white horse, new flowers and his proposal, she could say yes to him if she wanted, without fear of war. Because even though business was important, family was more important, and if Y/N was happy with him, then no one could say anything against that.

Her future husband only had to remember that if he hurt one of them, her the first, he would pay for it.

#peaky blinders #alfie solomons #alfie solomons x reader #alfie solomons imagine #alfie solomons fanfiction

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cannellee · 8 months

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Do you write for kazutora? If so can I request some headcanons of alpha kazutora and an omega reader?

TOKYO REVENGERS OMEGAVERSE ★

୨୧ alpha! Kazutora x omega! Reader

— tokyo revengers abo headcanons.

my masterlist : ☆

(I'm less confident writing for him but I hope it's still to your liking!!)

alpha kazutora has both a strong and soft scent, probably something like cinnamon mixed with citrus or musk.

I don't see him as someone who would care about hiding his smell, which would leave no room for doubt regarding his second gender.

he might appear confident but deep down he's a bit insecure and constantly ruminating about his past actions or more trivial things.

this is why kazutora is so infatuated with you. as an omega, you're very in tune with your own emotions and with those of others, this is why you understand him so well.

kazutora is so doubtful of himself, he can't believe such a sweet omega like you could fall in love with him.

this is also why he's so soft with you. contrary to what some people may believe, kazutora tries his best to be the perfect alpha despite all his flaws.

he treats you like you're oh so fragile, he knows you're capable of handling yourself but he can't help but feel protective of you.

his experiences shaped him and I'm sure kazutora would be extremely protective of you. this side of him is reinforced by his nature as an alpha.

I expect him to be really possessive of you, although you usually don't mind his clingy behaviour. he sometimes worries too much.

you both are tied at the hip. kazutora never leaves your side and worships the ground you walk on.

he loves you so much, he's just scared you'll get hurt one way or another.

insists on going with you literally everywhere, even for the most mundane things like doing groceries. he will go with you, feeling satisfied to have bathed you in his pheromones just before : letting others know you're already claimed calms him down a lot.

you can be sure he will have a hand on you at all times. whether on your hip, shoulder or your own hand. he says it puts him at ease.

he enjoys spending time with you the most.

he also likes to keep you inside, scenting you all day and making you feel safe by snuggling you against his chest.

he'll let out soft rumbles and spread his pheromones around the both of you.

kazutora is a bit shy at times, but he's always asking without a second thought if he can join you inside your nest.

that's probably one if his favourite place to be. your nest being your safe place, he feels so much joy and pride in being able to smell his scent on every item inside.

while on dates, he focuses on you most and foremost. will definitely buy you sweets and plushies. no requests from you can be denied in his eyes.

while kazutora more often stays neutral and wants to appear reassuring to you, when you're both outside and he senses danger, it's a whole other story.

he knows how to use his aura well and appear more intimidating, especially if it concern you.

kazutora's patience is thin, if he considers someone's stare to be too intense on you or if someone has the guts to stand too close to you for his liking, he will say or do something, and with no shame.

he has trouble controlling his emotions and will probably drag you away from where you are so that he can scent you again. if the man wasn't dealt with first with a growl or any snarky remark, kazutora has probably memorized his scent and will pay them a visit later with other members of his gang.

overall, alpha! kazutora is quite sensitive and you're the one who helps him stay composed. he can't imagine a life without you and vows to keep you safe. as your alpha, that's the least he can do.

#a/b/o tokyo revengers #alpha tokyo revengers #cannelle★#hybrid tokyo revengers #omegaverse tokyo revengers #tokyo revengers a/b/o #tokyo revengers headcanons #tokyo revengers hybrid #tokyo revengers omegaverse #tokyo revengers headcanon #tokyo revengers x reader #tokyo revengers #kazutora hanemiya #kazutora x reader #tokyo revengers kazutora #kazutora headcanons #kazutora imagine #alpha!kazutora #alpha kazutora

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joeliz99 · 4 months

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Under the stars- Theodore Nott

Sixth year at Hogwarts

Theodore Nott had always been a quiet young man, with a calm and reserved demeanor. He could count with one hand the number of friends he had made since entering Hogwarts. That detail didn't bother him; on the contrary, it had spared him from bad times and unnecessary enmities. His life was serene and somewhat monotonous, but he was content with that. After all, it was better than being at home with a father who never seemed pleased with what the young man did and the longing for a mother lost at an early age.

(Y/N) Greenwood lived to meet the expectations of the parents who had given her a home when no one else did. Always with the mindset of owing them everything she had achieved in her 16 years of life, and she had no plans to disappoint them in the slightest. From being sorted into Slytherin house, to being a polite and refined young lady, and showing disdain for those who weren't pure-blooded. It didn't matter if she agreed with it or not; it was the least she could do to show gratitude to her parents.

One night, while the rest of the Slytherin house students rested, Theodore and (Y/N) found themselves in the common room. Each in their own world. However, that very night, the two found a mutual interest that rested entirely on the power of a book that seemed uninteresting to others but captivating enough for them. What started with polite greetings in the common room, or the Great Hall, progressed to them sitting together in some classes. Later on, they became study or reading partners when they wished, and not long after, they found themselves spending time alone when there wasn't any other excuse to be together. That good friendship slowly transformed into affection, and that affection grew into love. Genuine and mutual love.

Theodore felt appreciated, just as when his mother was still alive, and his father became someone he faintly thought off. (Y/N) didn't have the pressure to pretend to be something she wasn't, she was simply herself. With her imperfections, her interest in the unknown, and her clumsiness. And Theodore accepted each of those things without a word of complaint.

Everything seemed perfect, and to a certain extent, it was. That was until the plans of a greater power interfered with the happiness of the young couple. Both were forced to serve Lord Voldemort even when they didn't support the cause. However, they yielded to the pleas and threats of their parents, who were loyal to the Dark Lord. Moments of tranquility ceased to exist, and the pressure on both young individuals to fulfill what had been imposed upon them was reflected in their lack of sleep, their little concentration in classes, and continuous paranoia. Yet, they still had each other, and sometimes that was enough.

Nights in the Astronomy Tower was a spectacle worthy of silent appreciation. The stars seemed to move to the Earth's rhythm, and the moon shone upon the two who layed against one of the arches in silence. Theodore's thoughts had drifted to a possible future that now seemed impossible, while the girl he loved remained lying on his chest, gazing attentively at the starry sky above them. The young man sighed and gently slid his hand down (Y/N)'s arm before planting a kiss on her head.

—(Y/N)... —

—Yes? — She didn't take her eyes off the sky, even though she was paying attention to what her boyfriend was about to say. —

—Do you think we would have had any chance to escape from all this? You know... For things to be different. —

(Y/N) takes a few seconds to respond and when she does, she simply shakes her head.

—I don't think so...— She adds after a moment. —We're too afraid. And if we had, we'd probably be dead. — Theodore clenches his jaw at the mere thought of losing her. He had already lost enough in this life.

—I'm sorry things are like this... You don't deserve any of this. I wish I could do more. — He murmurs, intertwining his hand with hers, who smiles bitterly and squeezes Theodore's hand.

—We're in the same position, Theo. There's nothing we can do... I just want you to promise me something. —

—What? — She lifts her face to look him in the eyes, and he smiles slightly, watching her intently.—

—Stay alive. — The girl whispers, brushing her lips against Theodore's. —I know it might sound selfish, but I don't care about anything else, Theodore. I know how things will be, and I know what we're facing. I can't even bear the thought of losing you because then none of this will be worth it. So please, promise me you'll do whatever it takes to stay alive. — Theodore remains silent for a while, just gazing intently at (Y/N)'s face. He places a gentle kiss on his girl's lips before nodding.

—Only if you promise me the same thing. I don't know what the hell will happen in the future, I don't even know if it'll be worth being in it. But maybe, just maybe, we'll have a chance to start from scratch. And I don't want to do that without you... So please, stay alive. —

The girl smiles slightly and nods, just as he had, gently caressing the boy's cheek before joining her lips with his. This time, the kiss was prolonged and filled with feelings and words too strong to be expressed with mere sentences. Their lips seemed made for each other, always syncing effortlessly and with so much love it seemed impossible. And right at that moment, even if it was just for a few seconds, everything seemed okay, like it used to be.

—I love you...— (Y/N) whispers as she breaks the kiss, her face inches away from Theodore's.

—I love you more. —

#theodore nott #theodore nott x reader #theodore nott imagine #theo nott #harry potter #harry potter fanfiction #harry potter fandom #slytherin

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noroi1000 · 1 year

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Hello, I read yandere Geto part 2 and I have a question. So she was tied up in her leg to the leg of the bed, was it because Geto was tired of seeing her try to escape or she did something and it was her punishment. (I guess technically is also a request, but if you don’t want to that’s fine) it takes place the day before where the second part of the story starts, as always she tried to escape and you wrote in the second part that after a week Geto didn’t find it entertaining anymore and that sometimes he would just wait in his room or something. Well while she was trying to escape she bumps into someone, another human who can’t see curses and it was one of Geto’s servants or employers, because in the jjk movie Geto mentioned that there were two types of monkeys, money making monkeys and curse making monkeys. And the person she bumped into was one of the people who makes money for him and they were on they’re way leaving after finishing work. Y/n immediately thought that this is her chance to finally leave since he knows the way around the temple. She begs him to lead her the way out and when he saw her stressed out face and decided to help her. He held her hand and they both walked quickly for a while until they both were getting close to the exit. Y/n excited because she thought she’ll be finally free and the moment he was about to open the door they both heard Geto’s voice. They slowly turned around to see his face just pure anger and disgust because someone else was touching his property. Y/n quickly turned around to get to the door but was pulled back into his arms and holding her really tight. The man who was helping her was confused but also a bit terrified because of Geto’s deadly aura and tried to leave even do he felt a bit bad leaving her behind. But unfortunately Geto murdered him with a curse spirit (how he died it can be however you want, but I ask that it would be messy like blood will fly everywhere) and Y/n saw the poor man die in front of her and both of them were covered with blood. He takes her back to the bedroom to take a bath and clean up. While taking a bath together he didn’t said anything at all and was washing her roughly because a filthy monkey touched something that belonged to him and the smell of another man was really bothering him and y/n was shacking because the memory of the man dying keeps repeating in her head and thought to herself if she kept doing this, she might die the same way even do Geto promised he won’t kill her. After that, he left the room locking it and went to get something when he came back it was the chain. She couldn’t move from the bed because a curse spirit was holding her and prevent from moving. He said “I had this for a while now in case for emergencies, I didn’t want to use it but after what happened I have no choice, this is for your own good you’ll understand soon.” And put the chain in her leg. After putting it on he looked at her terrified face and his eyes softened. He decided to bring her some food to calm her down, she was sitting in between his legs while cuddled up to her and he tried feeding her nicely but she kept rejecting him and saying she wasn’t hungry. She gave up and started eating after he gave her a glare. He kept talking to her nicely and pretended as if he didn’t kill the man earlier and that made her uncomfortable, and after they went to bed she let the tears fall down of her eyes that she was holding the entire time. He felt her crying and soothed her by signing because he’s a really good singer and that’s a fact. Until she went to sleep and he also did.

Little Monkey, my sweetheart 3

Words: 3k

Paring: Yandere Geto x reader

Warnings: death, blood

"Sweetheart, don't run away again. I won't do anything to you." He said when his face wasn't smiling. On the contrary, he seemed a little sad when he said that. He grabbed your hand before you were far enough away from him. "Honey, I'm getting bored of this. If you know you can't escape, why are you still trying? Please calm down. I don't want anything to happen to you when you try to run away."

You tried two days ago. You tried yesterday. So you will try today too.

He wasn't punishing you for trying to escape or looking for a way out. He didn't. He didn't do anything to you for running around the halls in panic as you jiggled the handles of all the doors that were next to you.

But he also didn't smile anymore the moment you did. He thought it was cute at first. That you're so sweet running around trying to find a way out. Like an untamed wild animal.

However, even such pets find out after a few days that they cannot try the same thing as always.

Another escape attempt? Maybe something that will make him smile at your attempts?

Well, when you're trying to escape, you can try even if he didn't want to. He wanted you to stay with him. But if you had thought of some other way to escape, and it had worked, he would have found you and taken you back to him anyway.

It's not like he enjoyed you escaping the room. You could go anywhere in the temple as long as you had his trust. You haven't had it yet.

He was bored with you running around looking for a way out. Even if there is usually no human here, and all the doors that are there can only be opened by him.

While you sometimes wandered the corridors, sometimes you came back slowly, afraid if the corridors were dark. Especially when it was night and he hadn't come to the bedroom yet. Then when the door was open you left.

Sometimes you heard him call your name.

However, he was quiet afterwards, just standing still and waiting for you to return.

Poor thing, you didn't know that every time you ran away, he would release a little curse after you. Well, he never caught weak curses. However, he only caught this one because this curse had perfect eyesight. So every time he didn't find you in the room or you ran away from him, a little bat followed you - a curse.

He smiled when he saw that you couldn't see that little curse. Thanks to its skill, he could see your facial expressions very well. He's seen all your moves. Even when they were dark. Because this curse had the ability to see in the dark. And what the curse saw, he saw too.

In the dark he often came for you when he clearly saw that you were panicking because you couldn't see anything and you couldn't find your way back. Only to pull you into his arms for comfort and lead you to peace. So that you can go to sleep together.

Most of the time, he would sit on the bed and wait for you to show up at the door, walk over to him, and hug him. And now?

But now it was different. You ignored what he said. And then you ran away. Running through the same corridors as always.

However, today was going to be completely different...

Today was your chance to escape!

You could have escaped today!

It was so close...

However...

You saw the man in front of you.

The first thing you thought was that Suguru caught you. Again. That Suguru is ahead of you to take you back to your room and pamper you like his little pet.

However, when you looked at this man who is walking in the same direction as you, he had short gray hair. It was definitely not Suguru.

Suguru is a young, tall man.

And this one here is lower. And apparently older.

He didn't notice you.

He didn't even look around.

So maybe he wasn't someone who was sent to catch you?

For all you know, there's a few more people here than just you and Geto. A few more... But you don't know how much.

This man was just walking through, and before he could turn the corner, You ran towards him. Feeling the floor beneath your socks, you didn't even notice that you might get it dirty. This temple was so clean. You're guessing someone has to clean up here all the time. The floors are still shining. cleaners? Maybe someone is a slave here? But you still don't see people going here. And if your "kidnapper" had slaves, they would serve you. Not Suguru himself, because he's always washing you, feeding you, and changing you. There are probably some cleaning ladies here who clean at certain times.

Especially when you noticed that the dark-haired man has an unusual aversion to people. You were surprised that you weren't quarantined after he took you. Because he has a sanitizing deodorant that he uses every time he meets people.

However, you... You feel like you're already completely marked by him. As if your skin isn't something he's supposed to loathe. Because he touches you and he can do it endlessly. He can kiss your skin, and still nothing.

You were curious what would happen if you hugged another man.

Would he clean you, or would he just not care.

You could find out later.

You walked over to the man who was walking in front of you, grabbing his sleeve. The sleeve of his suit? What was he doing here?

He turned to you, looking at you with eyes around which were soft tears.

He didn't seem like a nice man to you, but he didn't seem like a mean person either.

He was about middle-aged. And he looked rich, too.

"How can I help you, miss?" He asked with a friendly face.

"Did you—" You paused for a moment, afraid that this might be one of the Suguru family. Someone who can lead you to him right away, no matter what you want. However, you have to be brave.... You must know what you can do. So you asked the man. "Will you open the door outside for me...?"

You let go of his sleeve as he stood in front of you, looking at your face. He saw the desperation in your eyes as well as the fear. You were so stressed out. You kept looking in different directions. With fear. He felt from you the emotions that people who are afraid of being caught by someone feel. He didn't know you, but he must have guessed that something was bothering you.

Well, he's known Geto for a while. Since they had an agreement that he lifts all curses from him in exchange for regular payments of money. And his behavior towards some people was different. Sometimes he was smiling more, and sometimes he was more distant.

You don't seem like someone who is far from him. You are wearing beautiful, expensive clothes. You are also well-groomed. Regardless of how stressed you were, you looked like you had the best life. So the man didn't think you were the enemy of the master of this temple.

On the contrary. You must have been someone more important and closer to him. Maybe a member of his group who is like family to him?

As the man looked at your kimono, you were nervous about what would happen if Suguru saw you now.

Whenever you ran out of the room, you weren't as anxious as you are now. And that probably shouldn't be normal. Because he always just hugged you and told you not to run away again. And now? Now you've met a man, and with almost pleading eyes, you ask him to open the door for you outside.

"Door outside?" he asked, slightly confused. Until he finally understood what you meant. "You don't have the keys, miss? Don't worry, I can go with you. I have mine with me. I know it can be intrusive when the main entrance is closed. However, this ensures that no stranger enters here without permission."

She looked at him and I realized that it's not worth explaining to him how it really is. What mattered was that he would help you get out of here. He knows the way out.

He thinks you just lost your keys. And you don't need him to know the other version. You just want him to help you.

You started walking slowly through the corridors.

"You don't have to worry about not having the keys." He told you.

"I just want to get out of here... Finally leave this place..." you muttered softly.

"I don't understand your fear, but I will help you get out of here. You'll be home soon. Me too when I was here at the beginning I got lost and couldn't find a way out." He laughed and grabbed your hand, placing it on his bent arm as he walked with you.

Would you like to hurry up. He sees your desperation, but he doesn't know the truth.

You just want his kindness to lead you to the door and you can leave.

"You have a very beautiful kimono. I've never seen you here before."

You didn't talk to him. You just looked forwards and sometimes backwards. Hoping no one comes after you right now.

Your kimono was beautiful. Really. Suguru chose what was beautiful. And the bright kimono was already something you always wore. Because you looked so pure and innocent to him.

You were wearing a white kimono with fabric fading to a light shade of purple on the sleeves and at the bottom of the fabric. And on top of that, bright floral patterns.

All from the best material.

Even if the man was surprised that there were no shoes on your feet, he didn't ask.

And when you saw the bigger door, you felt some relief.

As his hands searched for the right key, you wanted to smile.

Until at some point you felt an ominous aura. And all your happiness has evaporated. Because you knew what that meant. Now, you wanted to ask Suguru to show you some mercy.

"May I know where are you two going?"

You both looked to the side, looking at a separate corridor where the dark haired man was standing. With a cruelly murderous aura. With anger painted on her face. And with a little disgust.

You wanted to repent and put your head down. Apologize because you hoped he wouldn't hurt you or the man next to you.

"It's disgusting... Someone else touching my property..." he muttered with a grimace.

"Geto-san. Good morning. I just brought the money. I was about to go, but the lady doesn't have the keys to the door with her. Our outing took a while because we both took our time walking." He said as he pulled the key out of the lock.

Even if you were standing a meter away from the man, you knew that the door was already open.

You thought about apologizing for what you'd done, but you had one more chance to escape. And you wanted to see if you could make it.

"She can't leave the temple." Geto said seriously, causing the man's confusion.

And then when he saw your body move to grab the handle and open the door, he moved too.

His body was perfectly trained for quick situations. His reflexes were the same.

That's why before you grabbed the doorknob with your hand, his hand grabbed your fingers.

And you were drawn to him. Your body collided with his. And your face lay against his chest as he stood there, holding your body tightly against his.

"I understand... I'm sorry for my mistake..." the man said softly, reaching for the doorknob. However, he couldn't get out anymore.

"I was going to get rid of you a long time ago... But I held off until you paid some money... Because you're someone who only cares about that. You would never understand why someone has a place."

You felt that sentence was being said about you. That you have your place with him...

"However, you..." he began. And after a short pause, he spoke again. "You just made me lose. I know all about the millions you stole from people. And I also know about the items you stole from this temple."

As his hand tightened on the doorknob, he couldn't feel his hand anymore.

A snake with very sharp teeth in its mouth, or rather with several rows of teeth, bit his hand off.

Then the other one started biting off his leg. For the others to start attacking his body.

"You were a bad man... Another monkey who collects curses. Besides, you wanted to help her escape... If you did, you'd hurt her. Because she would come back here anyway. Right, honey?"

As you watched the streams of blood running down the floor, you thought you were going to throw up. Especially when you continued to see how the snakes, of which there were more and more, tore apart the flesh of a man. Eating his pieces.

He didn't mean to hurt you. He has now punished you. Looking at it. Because he would never do something like that to you.

You will receive a penalty that will simply stop you from trying to escape.

When your eyes were wide and your body too petrified for you to look away, his hand appeared in front of your eyes. Blocking further view of the splattering blood.

"Did you understand your mistake?" he asked and you nodded your head. "Okay. So now let's take care of you~."

___

Warm water covered your body as you sat in the tub with him behind you.

You were pressed against his bare chest. All over his naked body. With his legs just by your side, you had no way to escape.

A sponge soaked in plenty of soap ran rough over your skin. Making your hands and arms red and itchy to the touch.

Because he had to cleanse you of that man's dirty touch on your body.

No matter how many times you told him it hurt you, he kept going. Until all you could smell was the lavender scent of the soap he used on you. Instead of the smell of blood you felt.

If this man was really bad, you shouldn't feel sorry for him. However, he wanted to help you. And....

You can't think about who this man was. He may have been bad, but he was good to you. That's enough. And now, its remains were digested in the stomachs of the snakes that ate him.

That was one of the two times you saw the curse. And you never want to know it again...

You don't want to die like this. Even if Suguru said he won't hurt you and he won't kill you...

"I had this for an emergency for a while I didn't want to use it but after what happened I have no choice it's for your own good you'll understand soon." He said while you were sitting on the bed. Dressed in a nightgown.

You widened your eyes as you saw the thin chain in his hands. And you involuntarily cowered, tucking your wrists and ankles in slightly.

"Please... Please Suguru... Don't do that..." You moaned weakly, pulling away from him. You didn't want to run away for fear of what might happen. So you thought asking him and begging him not to do it wouldn't be so bad for you.

"Sweetheart, You know what I think about deception and lies. I hate it when you do this. You promised you wouldn't run away today and then I found you by the front door with some monkey touching you!" he yelled as he sat on the bed reaching for your legs.

You grabbed his hand to stop him, however he grabbed your leg, gently wrapping a leather strap with a chain over your foot.

He fastened the other part of the chain to the bed.

Honestly, you don't know how to get it off of you... And you don't want to risk making him even angrier.

You sat there without saying a word.

Not even taking food from him as he sat behind you, putting food to your mouth.

You pushed your face to the side.

"(y/n) you need to eat something." he said, a slight annoyance evident in his voice.

"I'm not hungry..." you said quietly.

At that point, he grabbed your chin to lift your face up to look at him. He gave you a glare that made you cold.

And in that moment, you opened your mouth letting your favorite food inside.

"You are such a good girl. I love you. Exactly. Just give in and eat. Nothing bad will happen to you. I couldn't hurt you."

You felt like he could do just that.

When he held you tight in his arms as you lay in bed with him. Willing to sleep.

You couldn't stop thinking about the man's skin cracking as the fangs tore it apart...

It was just something that kept you awake.

His arms were wrapped tightly around you as he hugged you. It gave you some comfort. His warmth and his very presence. The presence of another person. It was reassuring. So nice for your fear-filled nerves.

But you still couldn't sleep. You cried silently, letting your tears seep through his shirt.

He wasn't sleeping either.

He listened to your silent cry. As your face pressed into his chest and your hands gripped the fabric of his shirt.

The chain on your leg rattled.

Then, to soothe your crying and help you fall asleep faster, he started humming a song in a calm voice.

He sang softly over your head, making your body listen to him.

He had such a nice voice. It was so reassuring...

Completely as if nothing had happened. Your eyelids got heavier and heavier. Until you closed your eyes, falling asleep, and hugged him.

Geto's VA singing:

youtube

#geto fluff #geto angst #geto x you #geto x reader #geto x y/n #Yandere Geto #jjk x y/n #jjk geto #jujustu kaisen

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literary-motif · 3 months

Text

People Pleasing's Never Good For Your Health

Asirel Cain x Reader

Asirel forgets to feed you.

Warnings: talk of starvation

Asirel, while being the kindest human you had encountered in a while, certainly was not the nicest. He was cold, calculating and gave you the impression that — despite saying otherwise — he wanted to earn your trust and good grace only to exploit you further down the road.

In his line of business, the selfishness he exuded certainly came in handy. At least, that was what you assumed based on the cryptic allusions he had made about it. It had not been easy to understand what your new occupation for him would entail since he was adamant about evading all your questions about himself, his life, and his work.

You accepted without hesitation regardless, jumping at the prospect of getting out of the chains digging into your skin, shackling you to the wall, and escaping the underground cell you had been placed in. There had been so little stimuli for your heightened senses during your time of captivity that with every passing day, it felt more and more like you were losing your mind, another piece of you chiseled away by the darkness and loneliness and quiet.

It was different with Asirel.

The mansion you were staying in was large and, despite Asirel’s obvious trust issues, had various people rushing in and out throughout the day. Not that you minded the commotion they caused. On the contrary, the sound of them going about their work made you feel calm. The smell they brought with them, their occasional touch when they brushed you in the hallway, made you slowly leave the rotten cage behind, which had shackled you for so long, and start feeling alive again.

Due to Asirel being so closed off, however, he did not exactly specify what you could and couldn’t do now that you were officially his, well, pet, and you did not want to risk upsetting him so soon into your collaboration.

What he had asked of you was not difficult to achieve, honestly. Watching over him, protecting him from some humans that might want to one-up him sometime in the future: no problem at all. You could snap all his assailants like a twig. Asirel was perfectly safe with you.

Standing in the kitchen now, the cook behind the kitchen aisle happily chatting to you about their two cats while slicing bread, the thought hit you that this was the happiest you had been in a long while.

You had your own room, which you could leave at your own volition to roam around the house and interact with people who, surprisingly, did not treat you like a monster or some creature to be afraid of. Of course, there was the occasional employee who would duck their head and find the most absurd excuse to leave the room when you entered, but they were oddly rare. Most of the staff, especially the cook, seemed mildly intrigued by you, treating you as just another part of their uncommon lives.

It was all rather charming, if not for a very substantial issue you did not know how to raise with Asirel: he had not let you feed in what felt like ages.

Vampires did not need to feed as often as humans did, so much was true, but at least once a week would be nice. Once every two weeks would also be acceptable if Asirel could only arrange for that much, but it had been a month since he had taken you in and ever since giving you his blood while you were still in your cell, shackled to the wall, he had not opened his veins again for you. That was a considerable time to go without fresh blood, and you had started to feel light-headed, occasionally having a spike of agony rise deep within you at being starved. Again.

You had been given next to nothing to eat during your captivity as a way to keep you weak and pliable for your capturers, but now, being tasked with protecting someone, you bitterly wondered how exactly you were supposed to do that efficiently and to the best of your abilities if Asirel did not give you enough to eat to restore your full potential.

A part of you wondered if he was doing it on purpose, keeping you weak because he did not trust you. Maybe he was afraid of what you would do, of what you could do if you wished, both to him and all the people in his care. But that would be unreasonable. Why get you in the first place, then? What use was a weak vampire? How would they protect him, when they themself were a potential threat if they lost their senses from sheer hunger?

More probable was the thought that Asirel simply did not know better. Of course, he had seemingly dealt with vampires and other beings for a long time during his career, but that did not mean he knew their requirements regarding the quantity of food they needed.

You had wanted to bring it up, but the unreasonable part of yourself — the mistrustful one — held onto the thought that he knew exactly what he was doing, and did not want you to feed for whatever reason. To keep you weak. To test you and find out how far he could push you until you caved.

You did not dare to ask him for blood he would not give of his own accord, which left you here, leaning against the wall of the kitchen and trying to follow along to Tay’s words as best as you could to distract you from the hunger eating you up from the inside.

“I know you’ve probably seen a lot of places,” they said, drying the salad leaves, “and I envy you for that. I’ve always wanted to go to Europe. Just imagine the beaches of the Mediterranean. Or the fog slowly creeping around the trees of the German Schwarzwald!”

“Why have you never gone, then?” you asked, eyeing the half-finished sandwich with disdain, “I’ve got some connections, I believe. If you want, I could inquire about the best places to visit.”

Tay blushed, stuttering out a quick thank you before declining the offer. “I mean, this job pays very well. That’s not the issue. I’m just thinking about going on this trip when I get married, like on a honeymoon,” they said, breaking into a beaming grin that would outshine the sun, “but I don’t think my fianceé’s ready yet. I’ll just wait. The Schwarzwald is not going anywhere. Besides, I have the two fur balls to look over, and I— damn!”

The scent of blood hit you an instant before Tay’s hiss of pain did. You inhaled sharply, mouth-watering, and muscles seizing at the acute reminder that food was within your grasp if you only dared to reach for it.

Mistaking your intake of breath for a gasp of worry, Tay reassured you quickly, cleaning their bleeding finger under the faucet before wrapping it in a tissue, “I’m fine really. I was distracted by the trees and my knife slipped. Nothing to worry about, I assure you.”

They turned around, shooting you a smile meant to be comforting, oblivious to your predicament. Distantly, you thought that they must have forgotten that you were a vampire, or they trusted you so much not to be afraid to bleed near you since they assumed you had yourself under complete control. You were not sure which of those answers made your heart ache more.

The feeling of hunger was only increasing, and no matter how much you tried to distract yourself by pushing your back further against the wall, you could feel the tread of your control slowly wearing down. You would snap any moment now. “Leave,” you bit out through gritted teeth, the confused tilt of Tay’s head only furthering your irritation, “Leave the room. I’m serious.”

“But I—” they began hesitantly, looking at you with wide eyes that shone with something akin to hurt, “I have not finished my work yet.”

You could no longer contain yourself, rushing towards them with unnatural speed. The smell of blood was all you could focus on, and it was so close you could almost taste the liquid in your mouth. It did not matter that it was Tay bleeding; the person who had opened up to you immediately and tried their hardest to make you feel comfortable in your new environment. It did not matter because the prospect of feeding after being denied for so long was just so intoxicating that it numbed your mind, letting your primal instincts take over.

“And pet,” Asirel had said after giving you a short tour of the house and introducing you to those under his care who worked in it regularly, “if you hurt any one of my employees, I’ll stick you back in a cage you will never get out of. Do I make myself clear?”

You braced yourself against the kitchen aisle at the last instant, gripping it with strength so crushing you wondered why it did not splinter under your hands. Tay had taken a hurried step back, their back hitting the counter and their hands raised as if trying to fend you off.

“Leave!” you growled again, closing your eyes to focus on your breathing and drown out the sound of the erratic heartbeat — pumping fresh, delicious blood in abundance — on the other side of the room.

“What is going on here?” Asirel’s sharp voice cut through the haze in your mind, the thought of blood momentarily forgotten as a sense of dread overcame you. “What did you do?” he hissed angrily, moving to stand beside you as if waiting, daring you to move and attack.

You looked up to Tay, who was still standing as far away from you as they could, frozen in shock and fear. Their wide eyes and rigid posture made your heart break. ‘A monster,’ you could see it reflected in their gaze on you, ‘I was befriending a monster.’

“I—” your voice caught on the first syllable.

“It’s my fault, really,” Tay said quietly, a forced smile appearing on their face, “I was careless, cutting myself in the kitchen. They just—”

Asirel raised a hand, making them fall silent. “I told you to behave,” he said, his tone of voice turning his words into a threat.

It made you bristle. Still refusing to look at him, you kept your gaze on the sandwich on the counter. The image of food reminded you of the pain cursing through you, the pain he was responsible for. The rage suddenly twisting sharply inside you forced you to take a steadying breath. “It would be easier to behave,” you snapped with as much venom as you could muster, “if you were not starving me!”

A part of you had expected Asirel to laugh at that, perhaps to mock you about how easy you were to break — at how pathetic it was that you were not brave enough to take what you needed for yourself — but he did not. The suffocating silence engulfing the room instead made your skin crawl with anticipation and uncertainty.

Clearing his throat, Asirel began to speak. “Tay,” he said calmly, but you could hear the underlying tremor in his voice, “Leave. Take a break, it’s alright.”

For a moment, it looked like they wanted to protest or say something, but a single look from Asirel made them swallow their words. They ducked their head and exited the kitchen, leaving the two of you alone together.

“I did not mean to snap at you,” you apologized in a whisper, but Asirel was not paying you any attention. He was busy removing his suit jacket and rolling up his left sleeve. You glanced at him, a frown on your face. “What are you doing?”

Asirel chuckled humorlessly. “What, you tell me I am starving you and expect me to just move on from that? I know you haven’t known me long, but I would have thought that you at least had some vague idea about the person I am. Now come on” — he held his arm out towards you — “drink. I know you want to, pet. You need to.”

He was right. But the overwhelming need to feed was exactly why you were hesitant to do so. You did not know how far you would go once you tasted blood, and you did not want to risk draining Asirel. “I—” you stuttered, as he kept looking at you expectantly, “I’m afraid I won’t stop.”

“I trust you,” he said without hesitation, “Come on now, I can see you’re fighting to restrain yourself. Give in, it’s alright.” Asirel stepped closer to you, making you fight the urge to take a step back. His heartbeat was even louder now, drowning out everything else. “I give you permission.”

Your resolve broke. Slowly at first, you began feeding, but the sweet taste of his blood in your mouth made you crave more and more. It had been so long that you could not help yourself now, finally allowed to satiate your hunger.

The soft grunts and hisses from Asirel barely registered as you continued, oblivious to everything but the satisfaction of finding relief. “Right,” he said hoarsely, “That’s enough for now.” You did not stop, too caught up in the bliss to notice his words. “Pet?” Asirel brought his free hand up to tread through your hair, pulling slightly to get you to release his arm.

With a herculean effort, you let go of him. “Pardon,” you mumbled, licking your lips to savor every last drop of his blood. Admittedly, you felt a lot better. The pain tearing at you had subsided, and you could feel renewed energy flowing through you.

When you looked back at Asirel, you found him leaning heavily against the counter, trying to catch his breath. He looked pale. A thin layer of sweat had appeared on his forehead and his hands shook as he tried to loosen his tie. “I just need a moment,” he said weakly, and you could see him swaying where he stood. “Just a moment, and then you can keep—”

You pulled up a chair from the kitchen table, grabbing his arm to keep him from falling as you helped him sit down. “Did I take too much?” you asked, narrowing your eyes as you undid his tie and opened the first button of his dress shirt. With quick steps, you walked around the kitchen aisle and grabbed the sandwich Tay prepared, bringing it to Asirel.

“No, not at all,” he answered quickly, eyeing the food. “I have just had something to eat. I’m fine.”

You kneeled, catching his gaze. “Asirel, I need you to be honest with me on this, please,” you said firmly, and the seriousness and gravity of your voice made him pause, “Did I take too much?” The burning intensity of your eyes entranced and confused him in equal measures, making him forget that you had not called him by his preferred title.

He considered your question for a moment, holding eye contact. “No,” he said with confidence, “You did not. It was fine, pet. Don’t worry.”

His response made you breathe a quiet sigh of relief. “Good,” you whispered to yourself. Asirel’s fingers running slowly through your hair brought you back to the present, raising your eyes to look at his somber expression. “Eat, please. You need the energy after the blood I took from you.”

“Why didn’t you say something?” he asked instead, continuing to play with your hair. You looked away, unable to meet his piercing gaze, but he stopped you, tilting your chin up with the fingers of his free hand. “Don’t look away from me, pet. Why did you not tell me you were suffering?”

“It was not a priority,” you said quietly, “and you seemed to be versed enough with vampires that I assumed you knew what you were doing, so what use was there in reminding you?”

For a moment, Asirel’s gaze softened. His expression turned from his usual mask of being entirely in control of a situation into one of anguish and guilt. He opened his mouth to say something but thought better of it. He exhaled slowly, and the hard look in his eyes returned a moment later. “From now on, tell me,” he said, taking a bite of the sandwich, “I can help.”

#sakuverse #zsakuva #asirel cain #asirel cain x reader #asirel

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chand-ki-priyatama · 18 days

Text

Ek khat mere pyare bade Bhai ke naam

@hectorfrombritain

You chose this name "HECTOR" for you , if we go in the literary sense it means to talk to someone in a bullying way - irony of this fact that you can never do that.... And so I nicknamed you "CEDAR"

One of the most sweetest, kindest being I ever met....

These are my feelings for you in the form of writing cause we are writers we do not speak we bleed ink on paper...

So ye khat aapke naam from aapki chhoti behen Clover aka me Kaya ek kaviyitri aur lekhika....

Mere pyare penguin bhaiya that's why I nicknamed you cedar cause Its metaphysical properties promote peaceful thoughts and help interpret messages from your inner self. Cedar supports us on spiritual quests by reconnecting and grounding us with earthly roots..... And I attribute all these qualities with you...

So Cedar bro , intellectual baatein karne wale samajhdaar bhaiya

Dear Bhai,

I first interacted with you via a reblog post and I was amazed by your thoughts on my writing then we had a very small chat on dm that's it.... then I joined the discord server but there too we never chatted much cause I was busy in creating a ruckus for myself

But now since we have started talking , I never felt as if I never had a word with you on the contrary it feels as if my day is incomplete without sharing words with you....

Someone beautiful as their existence

Someone who is dearest to me....

Honestly love the way you talk , and might I tell you you need to teach me about Greek mythology , you are so intelligent and intellectual means how just drop the secrets dude...

Although I am not there irl with you but I'll always be there for comforting you....

Never feel as if you are alone in something cause you have a little sister with whom you can share anything...

We are always together in everything although not physically but whenever you see the stars and moon remember that they bind me together with everyone and whenever you feel alone just look at them somewhere I am doing that too...

They bind me to you

Being one of the most supportive person and still doubting yourself is not good that's why I included earlier "Look at you comforting others with the words you wish to hear" , you are one of the bestest person out there so learn to trust in your abilities...... (I dare you say something contrary and see what I will do🔪)

You feel like a soft melody after constantly being irritated by pop music...

These are your vibes according to me :-

I still remember the day you told me your penguin story gosh I am still not over it , it was so cute and wholesome....

You know how I am the bubbly talkative af girl and to am extent I can say maybe nakchadi hu (still can't believe you though I was rude ) but you are the contrary mature, intellectual, introverted but that's what makes us brother and sister...

If I had to say you were a colour I'd definitely say you are green cause Those with Green color personality strengths tend to be perfectionistic, analytical, conceptual, cool, calm, inventive and logical. They seek knowledge and understanding as well as always looking for explanations and answers....

As if fictional character fight me but I will always say you are Mr. Darcy from Pride and Prejudice cause you give off those gentlemen vibes...

Now imagine we met and you know my obsession with Polaroids so think these pics as them...

I know deep down sometimes (always) just like me you think about things about what would happen but isn't it the part of growing up...

अजीब दास्ताँ है ये, कहाँ शुरू, कहाँ ख़तम

I associate these lyrics with you cause our friendship was something very unexpected....

Last few days were tough for me so thank you for always being there for me and supporting me throughout....

I lost my faith in friendship way too early but thanks to you and few others that you revived it....

Now imagine me playing a guitar and singing this song to you...

I been tryin' to do it right (Hey) I been livin' a lonely life (Ho) I been sleepin' here instead (Hey) I been sleepin' in my bed (Ho) I been sleepin' in my bed (Hey) (Ho) (Ho) so show me family (Hey) all the blood that I will bleed (Ho) I don't know where I belong (Hey) I don't know where I went wrong (Ho) but I can write a song (Hey)

I belong with you, you belong with me You're my sweetheart I belong with you, you belong with me You're my sweet

I dedicate these lyrics to you...

Just so you know I love you to the moon and back and I always appreciate and cherish your existence....

As always I'll dedicate these songs to you and as of its voice note I'll send it to you...

Now I think I have spoken enough

So signing off Cedar bro,

With love always

Kaya 💗

#desiblr #desi aesthetic #desi teen #mutuals my beloved #kaya ke pyare mutuals

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its-actually-minicika · 1 year

Note

As someone who wakes up spooning her blankest I'm curious what would HW Aemond do if Lady Tully was like that? Let's say they sleep with pillows in between but somehow she managed to throw them or roll over them and now Aemond is the little spoon. I think he would hold it over Lady Tully's head in a 'you love me too' way but then again he doesn't talk much and everytime he talks he says wrong things so...

How We Can Fit

Pairing: THW!Aemond x Reader;

Warnings: surprisingly... none? Some usage of strong language, but that should be all

Author's Note: Okay, I was planning to reply to this in my usual 3-4 sentences answer. BUT my mind kept thinking about this while in class, so have this sort of one-shot headcanon piece (?) that could have plausably happened in the "Harshest Winters" universe!

I did this while on the 30min ride back home, so don't really consider this a full on fanfic? More like a little snippet into what could have been idk :"))

Sometimes he wishes he got to you first. What would have been then?

And so cruel morning arrives, stirring Aemond awake, as would a mother’s gentle hand. Golden threads of daybreak light thread themselves into his silver hair, falling like a hailing echo down her calming face, giving her the image of naught else but a flaming Goddess.

His eye widens at the proximity between them. His right hand twitches in alienated bliss. Almost immediately, he stops his movements – his breathing – all in the hopes of not waking her up.

He trails his stare over her lips, slightly parted in their merry sleep, and over her plump cheeks, marred slightly red by the blissfulness of her dreaming.

His heart is hammering out of his chest, for he can feel her limbs entangled with his, holding him closer yet to her heaving form.

For but a moment, the calls of blasphemy and duty pull him away from the glorious sight before him. It was past dawn, and he had a war to win.

Still his heart broke upon thinking of leaving her unintentional embrace.

Perhaps he could stay in bed some more.

Two, mayhaps three hours passed.

In her tender slumber, the girl’s hands remained snaked around the Targaryen’s lean chest. Her chin was plopped above his head, leaving a very conflicted Aemond to wrestle underneath her bosom, and hold her gently by the nape of her neck, and small of her back.

A low purr almost escaped his lips, as her tiny heartbeats reached his contempted ears.

But all good things must come to an end. And his perfect morning stopped abruptly, as his Lady took in a deep breath, and slowly tried to rouse from their entangled sheets.

“Mmm…” She sighed into the warm pillows, “... Jace?”

All his blood that had gone to his crotch, now left for his ears. Aemond pursed his lips tightly in response to her sleepy question, and only drove his head further into her neck. If he closed his eye fast enough, then maybe…

A near-horrified shriek parted from her downturned mouth, and the woman made haste to rise from her resting place, peeling her warm body off of Aemond’s.

This had not been the right approach, she chastised herself relentlessly, whilst biting on her lower lip. If he wasn't already awake before her, he most certainly was now.

Her cheeks were set ablaze, both embarrassed and offended, as she noticed the separating wall she’d made between them… discarded away, on the Prince’s half of the wide bed.

“I know you’re awake, you know.” The woman hushed to the Targaryen, while crossing her arms over her aching chest. “Pretending to be asleep is beneath you.”

“As were you, My Lady, whilst coddled up to me.” The older man mused to himself, and whistled lowly, while his voice oozed out with confidence – although his lilac orb had strayed away, glimmering with a look akin to a growing discomfort.

Uncertainty.

“Should I assume your desperation to blossom from feeling cold at night? … Or, on the contrary, for feeling too hot near me?” A taciturn smirk pulled at his lips. “I should be very happy to help relieve you. With either affliction of the two.”

The Lady’s face turned sour, and her nose scrunched up at his advances. “I should find myself in ample heat, Prince Aemond, thank you. Do not worry yourself to touch me further.”

Familiar anger swirled dangerously inside his purple hue, and the Prince Protector of the Realm took a deep breath to soothe his nerves.

“Ungrateful wench.” He hissed through his gritted teeth. “You act like a bitch in heat, trying to seduce me, and then you pull away?”

Her mouth slouched open at his cutting words. “Excuse you?” She almost spat out in a low churl, “As if it wasn’t you who removed our barrier sometime along the night.” His irking remarks had brushed off any reminders of her mellow sleep. “Honour me by answering this, my Prince – between the two of us, who’s acting more like the bitch in heat?”

(Y/N) didn’t think Aemond was capable of blushing – but as she gave him a haughty glare, one that he couldn’t look away from, his face turned of a violent hue.

She had a point. He had removed the pillows that kept his body away from her, and did encourage her movements throughout his sleepless night.

Wordlessly, he scowled, starting to regret sleeping in with her.

“Do not flatter yourself, My Lady. You are no better than any maid I can find at any brothel.” His body burned with shame at his own words, and yet he couldn’t stop the flow that followed. “Hmm, but dare I even compare you to one?” His mouth contorted to a painful scowl, “At least there I should be able to rise up their skirts and see what’s underneath. Go as far as to pay two silvers for a real maiden, too.”

Long and hard had he awaited her next reply, but to no avail. After a quick quirk of her brow, the woman had turned around, getting off the bed and gathering the pillows from the cold floor.

“You won’t say anything? Do you care so little for your honour?”

“I care not what you think of it. And I certainly have no reason to prove myself to you.”

“Aeveris ābra.” He growled at her lack of interest. “Skoro syt līs ao qrimbrōzagon issa sīr?”

Still fuming with dissatisfaction, the young Prince slid out of the bed and began putting on his leather pants. His ire had reached peaks of no return, but he would be damned if he ever tormented the girl further.

His words had done nothing to aid him. His countenance, even less. There was no point in him staying in her presence any longer.

As he put on the last reminder of his clothes, the King Regent of the Seven Kingdoms made four wide steps towards the big, oak doors.

“I shall return later. We’ll dine together, as we do every night.”

Her silent treatment broke him from the inside out. He would apologize to her, when the time was right.

The ridiculous thought put an end to his automatic movements.

… Since when does he feel the need to do that?

Since he dared to love her, came his bitter reply.

His hand reached for the door, but her voice rang out through the wide chamber.

“Nyke dōmrī daor naejot naevlor iksum. Olvie less ao.”

Hearing her proud and crystal words, Aemond allowed a stilling smile to grace his lips.

"Nyke ȳdra daor jaelagon naejot naviras ao. Dōrī ao." He corrected her as he stepped away.

"Fret not, there is plenty of time for me to teach you."

… If only he’d gotten to her first.

Translations:

“Aeveris ābra.” = Vile woman.

“Skoro syt līs ao qrimbrōzagon issa sīr?” = Why must you curse me so?

“Nyke dōmrī daor naejot naevlor iksum. Olvie less ao.” = (in a VERY broken High Valyrian) I never meant to tempt anyone. Much less you.

Yeah, Aemond is kinda dumb when it comes to romance <3

#the harshest winters #aemond targaryen #bookcanon aemond x reader #dark aemond x reader #dark aemond targaryen #idk at the end of the day he's still thw aemond #homie simps but he simps with no rizz #absolutely 0 rizz dude #he tries #he fails #he proceeds to try again #all for nothing tbh #this ended up worse than I thought it would lol #but i hope you guys enjoy nonetheless

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flaneurpastel · 1 year

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i like to think that simon 'ghost' riley is a person, first, fragile, and second, passionate.

you'd say i'm describing an ooc!simon riley. but to tell the truth maybe not so much ?

listen carefully.

simon riley is certainly a cold man, a killer whose acts are justified by a little heroism, but still a killer, sometimes if not rarely sarcastic, and all camouflaged by a mask. he is someone who is simply untouchable, you can't read his emotions, you won't know anything about him until he lets you.

but when he does... oh, i think you can consider yourself lucky to have stumbled upon him.

a fragile man, fragile because simon doesn't know how to love. and he has a complex about it. he knows he loves you, he knows he could die, kill for you. but the three famous words don't come out, the romantic gestures, the caresses full of affection, he knows he is capable of it, but he doesn't know how. he knows that his difficult childhood, his long years in the military, and the many one-night stands with no real attachment have not helped. and it makes him so fragile, to know that he has always been excellent in what he did in his life. except in this one, the most important one.

starting his military service as a young teenager, rising through the ranks with an ease that frightened his superiors, handling more weapons than a normal soldier, bringing his sergeants home without ever taking a loss.

but knowing that the one thing that really mattered to him, he didn't know how to do. knowing that he has a love as big as the world, and that you could probably never know how big it is. it makes him fragile to know that any day now, you'll realize that simon is not good enough for you, not romantic enough, not vocal enough about his feelings.

simon is such a, such a fragile man, for you. and i find, that's somehow better than i love you's all the time.

but he's also a passionate man, because all that love for you he conveys in the way he makes love to you. please pay attention to the fact that I said making love and not just "fucking". of course you have your moments, where you just have to do quickies. but the passion that emanates from this man, can be felt through the languid and feverish kisses he leaves on your body. the way simon, repeats like a prayer, your name, again and again. How, your bodies during all this time, remains always, always, stuck one against the other. his face hidden in the hollow of your neck while his movements seemed terribly slow but with a gentleness unparalleled for a man of his stature. he transmitted his love to you through all these delicacies.

but it is also passionate through your hard moments. because your arguments with simon, never leaves you indifferent, both of you. it is fervent, fiery. strangely, but not so much that in the end, the words are not held back from simon, you either. tears flow from both sides, but you don't know that. simon is always afraid of losing you because of one of these arguments, and yet he can't bring himself to calm the situation down. on the contrary, it seems that he even tends to make things worse.

oh simon, why ?

simon is so in love, madly in love with you, that he knows that these arguments would only be good for you. sure, you will be saddened by these hurtful words, but out of hatred for him you will realize that you are much too good for him. he doesn't want you to know that he doesn't deserve you, that everything he does is for you. otherwise you'll come right back to him. but he knows damn well that he doesn't deserve you, when he excels at everything he does, but three words are much harder to say than all the inhuman trainings he's had to endure.

which brings up the point of his fragility. don't get me wrong, his love for you is anything but fragile. take it as its antonyms, and it will be its very definition.

eternal. unbreakable. indestructible.

that's him, simon 'ghost' riley, accompanied by his lack of self-confidence about his feelings that are delicate.

and then maybe during your fights, the hurtful words you would throw in his face too, would make it easier for him. he would forget you more easily. but he knows that no matter how much crap you throw around, simon will always love you as much if not more.

______

pls let me know what do you think of this!!

#simon ghost riley x you #simon ghost riley x reader #simon riley #simon riley x reader #simon ghost riley #ghost x reader #ghost headcanons #ghost x you #cod x reader #mw2 x reader

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notesonartistry · 7 months

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I feel so bad for Taylor because we are the ones and specially the media who are up her personal business. She doesn't post her whereabouts and what she's doing etc and for people to say they are sick of her being everywhere. That's not her fault! We are the ones who are invading her personal space.

Honestly, I think it's good for all of us to think about our consumption of people's lives and how it affects them, but it's also something that Taylor accepts as part of her fame and I actually think she's more aware than ever about how to keep it manageable for herself. Of course, that doesn't mean she likes it, and there are definitely people (maybe fans, maybe just people wanting a viral post) who overstep the mark - tracking jets, sharing and turning up at places where she's seen, hanging around outside her home. The media just follow the money - there's so much demand for Taylor that it's worth their while to document everything. If people stop clicking, they'll move on to someone else, but I can't see it changing in any significant way any time soon.

I just ignore people complaining about her being everywhere. There are plenty of tools available to filter content on social media, they don't need to click on any of the articles and the coverage of her attending the games has already calmed down a lot from the first couple. Sometimes I think people just like to be contrary and complain to show that they're different from everyone else.

Taylor is doing what she can to balance things while also living her life and promoting her music. She seems to be happy right now, although I'm sure that sometimes it all gets frustrating. She loves the connection with fans, but we've also seen her talk (e.g. in Miss Americana) about her discomfort with people overstepping boundaries. You'll struggle to get many of the people doing that to change though, so all you can do is be conscious of your own actions.

I feel like this perhaps reads as me being unsympathetic, and I'm really not, I hate to see her being hounded all the time, but Taylor has been in this industry for over 17 years now and she knows the scrutiny that it brings. I trust her ability to weigh up the situation and make her own choices. She has great people around her to support her too. I wish people would give her space to live, and that the media would back off, but that's not the reality of the situation.

#i am incapable of not rambling!

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vikkirosko · 1 year

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Hi! Can I request the hiveswap friendsim troll with human albino female reader please?

Reader is the purest diamond of innocence of this universe and really wants to be friends with everyone they meet. Even if her looks make her stand out a little too much.

Thanks!

💚 Lanque Bombyx x human fem albino!Reader headcanons 🌷

From the very first day you were on Alternia, you attracted a lot of attention to yourself, even if you didn't want it. You were an albino and for trolls your appearance stood out very much. Some were afraid of you and some, on the contrary, tried to get to know you better. One of those who showed you friendliness was Bronya. You met her by chance when you came to the caves where all the jadeblood trolls lived, and she invited you to stay with them for a while so that she could help you figure out life on Alternia

You were able to quickly find a common language with some of the jadeblood trolls, and each of them warned you to be careful with Lanque. You didn't know the reason for this, and Lanque was watching you from the sidelines. You seemed interesting to him. He had never seen aliens, much less albinos, but when Bronya was around he couldn't approach you, so when she was busy he came to meet you. You turned out to be completely different from what he thought

You sincerely wanted to make friends with him, you were friendly, smiled a lot and didn't mind talking to him. You completely ignored his hints and light flirting, sometimes it seemed to him that you just ignored it, but pretty quickly he realized that this was not the case. You were innocent and sincere, which made you stand out even more among all those who lived on Alternia. At first, your innocence caused Lanque some irritation, but it disappeared pretty quickly

He became attached to you and began to treat you more gently. At first, Bronya was wary of your communication, but you calmed her down, saying that Lanque was good and would not harm you. Sometimes you went to the city together. He showed you interesting places and helped you get used to a new place for you. Every time he saw your sincere smile and the enthusiastic twinkle in your eyes, he could not restrain his own smile

Every time someone could harm you, he became your protector. Next to you, he became more attentive and tried to make you feel happy. He knew that the time would come and you would go further on your journey through Alternia, which is why he tried to spend as much time with you as possible

#homestuck #Hiveswap #hiveswap headcanons #Hiveswap x Reader #hiveswap friendsim headcanons #hiveswap friendsim #hiveswap friendsim x reader #Lanque Bombyx #Lanque Bombyx x Reader

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nevis-the-skeleton · 1 year

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The relationship between Soundwave and the Decepticons in the TFP series

Hi, today I will be looking at the relationships Soundwave has with the other Decepticons in Transformers Prime. Soundwave is a robot who, even if he is discreet, still has more or less cordial interactions with the other members of the Nemesis.

Megatron

Megatron and Soundwave are friends without a doubt, and Megatron actually likes Soundwave. I mean, I think it's only when he talks to Soundwave that he doesn't shout! And it's rare!

Also, Megatron is worried about his TIC, and he has a bit of an odd priority of dealing with the injured if Soundwave is one of them. Just see in the episode where KnockOut returns in an terrible state after hit a train, but first has to fix Soundwave's broken visor and Laserbeak. Poor KnockOut.

Soundwave is the favorite, probably because he's loyal. But even with Shockwave, Megatron doesn't have such a cordial relationship.

Soundwave truly has a special place in Megatron's Spark more than anyone else. And that special place is reciprocated, seeing how Soundwave defends Megatron when he's in a coma, or when his leader is with the Autobots fighting Unicron, and Airachnid tries to take control. He fought against her to defend his friend.

The two have a very strong friendship, it shows that even the biggest villains can like each other, and that's fragging beautiful.

Starscream

You might find this surprising, but I don't think Starscream hates Soundwave, I think he likes him a little more than he wants to admit.

Throughout the series, Starscream is frankly distant and mean with everyone, except… Soundwave!

And before you say to me, "Yeah, but he's not mean to Soundwave, because Soundwave is strong, and he's scared of him-" No. Starscream is mean even with Megatron, so it can't be that...

Also, we know how Starscream reacts when he's scared of someone, and that's clearly not the case with Soundwave. On the contrary, he trusts him completely.

I mean, it's with Soundwave that he has the calmest conversations, and he's usually not afraid to show his confidence around Soundwave either. These are the rare times he stands tall, and it's really not often. Generally he is always tilted, because he withdraws into himself and is afraid.

Also, Starscream is not jealous of Soundwave, as he can sometimes show with Shockwave or Airachnid. It's surprising when you know what special person Soundwave is for Megatron.

But, I think that's because Soundwave, in addition to not threatening its SIC title, has been around much longer than Shockwave or Airachnid. In fact, I think he considers Soundwave to be just legit, as an TIC and alongside Megatron. In addition of the time he's with the Decepticons, the question does not even arise. Unlike Airachnid who is a former renegade, and Shockwave who comes straight back from the dead with a destructive new invention (aka Predaking).

Unlike Shockwave or Megatron, Soundwave has never harmed Starscream in the past, or since, so it definitely helps to have a pretty sweet relationship.

And, it's kind of funny actually, but Starscream listens to and obeys Soundwave more than anyone else. For example: When Starscream is about to kill Wheeljack, Soundwave stops him. Starscream begins to get angry, when he notices that Soundwave did it, and there Starscream calms down. He thinks it over, and agrees with Soundwave that killing Wheeljack isn't essential, and that he might still be useful.

Or when Soundwave asks Starscream to reconnect to the machine Megatron, Starscream does. He could very well tell Soundwave to do it himself. But no, he does, simply because Soundwave asked him to.

Also, Starscream always seems to understand Soundwave, while the latter absolutely never speaks. Soundwave and Starscream sometimes seem to have strange discussions, where one speaks and the other responds with silence. It's pretty cute when you think about it.

I don't think Soundwave hates Starscream, otherwise he would show it a bit more like he does with Airachnid. He is ready to listen to Starscream, and is never mean to him.

I don't think he likes him, since Starscream is always trying to kill Megatron, but I think he would still like to learn to like him, if in exchange Starscream would learn to quell his desire for power.

In fact, they would make good friends.

Airachnid

Soundwave hates Airachnid, I even think it's the only one who managed tomakes him angry. When Airachnid offers the troops to abandon Megatron, Soundwave stops his job, and turns to her, in a rather tense position. As if expressing some form of anger.

Soundwave has never fought a single Decepticon other than Airachnid, and I think that's just because Soundwave doesn't see Airachnid as a Decepticon. But more like an enemy.

Airachnid also hates Soundwave, given that when she gets the chance, she tries to get revenge on him. The two therefore have a mutual hatred, but not for the same reason.

Soundwave actually sees Airachnid as a threat to the Decepticon cause and Megatron. Basically, Starscream is also a threat to Megatron, but as I explained before, Soundwave can't seem to hate him, because unlike Airachnid, he can be handled if you're nice to him.

More than a desire for power, Starscream especially wants to be loved and listened to. Unlike Airachnid who just likes to take things she normally can't have.

Airachnid, on the other hand, hates Soundwave because he publicly humiliated her. But frankly it was deserved. It wasn't Megatron in front of her, but Soundwave. And if the leader of the Decepticons is easy to get mad, this is clearly not the case with his TIC. So that means she really went too far.

Laserbeak

Laserbeak and Soundwave get along really well, they don't have much interaction on the show, but it's seen that both are willing to fight to protect the other.

For example, when Laserbeak gets captured by Ratchet, he surely sends a distress message to Soundwave, and the latter comes running to save him. At this point, Soundwave had a chance to kill Wheeljack, but between killing an Autobot or saving his minicon, he didn't even hesitate.

Soundwave really likes Laserbeak, he even asked to fixe his minicon before him. Laserbeak also saves Soundwave from the Autobots when he can, when he could just run away.

Their relationship is subtle but adorable.

So, that all for my analysis, it's true that there are many other Decepticons that I haven't mentioned, but simply because there isn't much to say.

KnockOut is rather neutral towards Soundwave, maybe the TIC scares him a bit, but that's all.

Breakdown and Dreadwing have never shown any real interaction with Soundwave, he seems a bit invisible to them.

And Shockwave clearly doesn't care, he already doesn't pay attention to anyone but Megatron. It's really a commonplace relationship between work colleagues.

#soundwave #starscream #megatron #airachnid #laserbeak #knockout #shockwave #breakdown #dreadwing #tfp #transformers prime #analyse #soundwave and the others #relationship #maccadam

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studentinpursuitofclouds · 1 year

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Hello! Could you possibly write a bachelor’s headcanons on having a farmer who has a tic disorder/Tourette’s? As someone who experiences tics daily, it can be extremely frustrating and painful so it would be cool to see how they help the farmer deal with it!

I'm so sorry you're experiencing this and I really hope you're feeling much better now! Sending you lots of love and support ❤️❤️

I hope the translator didn't let me down and that I didn't write any mistakes that would make the sentences look weird. English is still hard for me...

Thanks for your ask! ☺️ Enjoy)))

SDV bachelor having a Farmer s/o with tick:

Harvey:

Even with his 'doctor mod', Harvey always stays calm with the Farmer. The Doctor knows that they are not at all helpless and can take care of themselves. It doesn't stop them from being who they are.

But Harvey also knows that tic can be very frustrating and distributing, sometimes getting in the way of normal communication and life, and that not everyone can understand this. So Harvey always knows what medicines and in what quantities to give the Farmer if the tic becomes completely unbearable, he is always ready to cook comfort food from him, support with affectionate and encouraging words, he knows what words to choose for a not very polite interlocutor if they don’t stop asking stupid questions about their tic. He loves them the way they are. They'll get through this together, doctor's promise!

Sebastian:

Sebastian locked the door to his room as his s/o tik started again. Making sure no one would disturb them, he gently began massaging his s/o's shoulders to calm them down and let them relax. Sebastian was sincerely afraid that he would not be able to help them somehow, but, on the contrary, would make things worse. He knows his s/o tick sometimes can be unbearable.

Sebby spent the whole night looking, besides medication, for other ways to help with his partner's tic aggravation. Herbal tea, massage, exercises - anything that will help his loved one. After that, he, of course, consulted with Harvey about what they can or cannot do from this.

After their tic passed, Sebastian suggested that they take a walk to the shore of the lake. As they walked, Sebby expressed his regret at not being able to help the Farmer, besides massages and other things. But when his beautiful s/o tells that everything he does (and his love and support) really helps, Sebastian will have a smile on his face, followed by big hugs and kisses.

Shane:

Look, Shane doesn't understand their syndrome/illness very well, and it makes him feel helpless. But he will try his best, because they are very important for Shane. He knows that he can always turn to Harvey for help and advice, and he will protect them from any asshole who dares to even think about laughing at their tick, and he will protect them for life and death, that's for sure.

If the Farmer feels bad about the tick disturbing them and others, Shane will constantly remind the Farmer that they are not alone. They helped him become a better person, no matter how hard Shane pushed them away. They accepted him into their lives with all his flaws. They are a miracle that appeared in the life of such a worthless person as Shane. What, stop calling yourself that? Heh, okay, for them, he'll do anything.

Elliott:

Elliott spent a couple of days in the library looking up and reading medical books, and another day at Harvey's clinic to learn from the doctor about all the options and ways to deal with his partner's tic complication. Perhaps Elliott reacts a little emotionally to this, because his s/o is a strong person who can help themself. But he can’t even see their face expressing pain and anxiety for a minute. Elliott's heart breaks every time he sees the Farmer hurt.

And yet the writer does not lose his head. Counseling with Harvey, medication reminders, helping out on the farm, dedicating a poem to his s/o to make them feel better... A two-hour tirade on a bully tourist who dared to open filthy mouth and say something bad about their beautiful s/o. Outrageous, Elliott is ready to tear this wretch to shreds! But then he quickly returns to the Farmer, because that loser is not worth more than one minute of his attention, while Elliott is ready to devote an eternity to the Farmer.

Alex:

When Alex chased away the nasty worker Joja, who out of boredom began to pester and tease the Farmer because of their tick, the athlete believed that he was no better than that freak. Recalling his first days of acquaintance with his future s/o, he, though not on purpose, but also casually spoke to the Farmer, expressing a little annoyance due to their peculiarity. Over time, when he got to know the Farmer better, and began to reveal his tender part of himself to them, Alex felt guilty. Grandma Evelyn often told her grandson to always be careful with his words, but Alex usually brushes aside this. Grandma was right, wasn't she?...

But the Farmer continued to talk with him. After all, they gave him a bouquet, and a little later, a mermaid pendant, a true symbol of love. And Alex sometimes thinks that he is not worthy to wear this pendant. But looking at his favorite s/o every time, Alex knows that he is still very lucky in life, and he will never let go of his happiness.

Sam:

Sam had always been cool with Farmer's tick, before and after they started dating, never showing even the slightest annoyance towards the Farmer. Of course, when they both officially announced themselves as a couple, Sam had no idea that his s/o could be in such a difficult situation because of a tick. Not to mention how much it upsets them.

Sam had a lot to write about Tourette syndrome. But this is not a summary like at the university, but notes from Dr. Harvey, a list of pills, the time of taking these same pills. As well as a list of favorite snacks and sweets for the Farmer. Sam specifically keeps such a notebook so as not to forget or miss anything. He sincerely loves and cares about s/o, so, remembering his frequent absent-mindedness, Sam approached this with all seriousness. In addition to the listed list, Sam will also often play a soothing tune on his guitar that will lull the Farmer or cheer them up. Whatever happens, Sam will be there with them.

#thanks for the ask!#stardew valley #sdv #sdv sam #sdv sebastian #sdv alex #sdv shane #sdv harvey #sdv elliott #sdv headcanons

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hebimoonlightwrites · 1 year

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hellooo! how are you? >u< well since the requests are open, I would like to request relationship headcanons for itsuki, yohei, anne and allen being with a rebellious girl~ , someone who doesn't like to follow anyone's orders and very sure of herself, in conclusion a total brat ! but when she's with them, she behaves a little better, pouting a bit because deep down she's a lioness who likes to be pampered jeje Thanks! take care <3

Writer's corner: Hi, sweetheart! I'm fine! I hope you are as well! Thank you so much for your request! I hope you'll enjoy reading what I prepared for you! If not, please, feel free to let me know, so i can fix it or write something else for you! Enjoy~♥

mc's pronouns: SHE/HER

Warnings: none, just a lioness who wants to be pampered oof-

⭐𝐈𝐭𝐬𝐮𝐤𝐢, 𝐘𝐨𝐡𝐞𝐢, 𝐀𝐧𝐧𝐞, 𝐀𝐥𝐥𝐞𝐧⭐𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐚 𝐫𝐞𝐛𝐞𝐥𝐥𝐢𝐨𝐮𝐬 𝐛𝐫𝐚𝐭-𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐟𝐞𝐦!𝐦𝐜 𝐰𝐡𝐨'𝐬 𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐮𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲 𝐚𝐝𝐨𝐫𝐚𝐛𝐥𝐞

⭐What the hell is wrong with her?!

⭐I'm sure that Itsuki would be pretty confused and especially pissed off at first by seeing mc behaving so brat-like!

⭐Since Itsuki is so rational and almost doesn't know what feelings are, I headcanon him even almost scolding mc.

⭐He'd behave just like a father would with his own child.

⭐Like imagine him moving his index finger scolding mc, while she's sitting on the couch with a bored expression.

⭐"You're not my leader! I don't have to follow your orders if I don't want to!!"

⭐mc would say as a response, looking at Itsuki with a confident and serious look, almost quite aggressively.

⭐"It's not about being a leader or not, mc! And I'm not trying to give you orders, but to tell you what should be better to do! And you don't listen to me, as always, in short!"

⭐Itsuki would be pissed off by the impulsive mc who doesn't want to listen to his boring speech..

⭐And.. his speech is not boring at all!!

⭐If he's worrying about her, it's because he cares.

⭐Why can't she just think more before doing anything!?

⭐I'm sure Itsuki would find mc being in the middle of a fight with someone.

⭐"You piece of sh#t!! How you dared to insult me?! I'll make you pay!!"

⭐Itsuki would facepalm himself before thinking for a moment..

⭐He's made this way, after all.. he trusts his own mind deeply, contrary to the impulsive and brat-like mc.

⭐"She only brings troubles.. what do I have to do with her?.."

⭐..he'd sigh and then decide to reach for her and to help her, even if in deep he would prefer to ignore her.

⭐Itsuki would talk with the people mc would have been in a fight with, showing and proving her that sometimes rationality is stronger than impulsivity.

⭐Only when home together, mc would sit on the couch, crossing her arms and pouting.

⭐Itsuki would soon understand that mc is secretly adorable..

⭐but why then she behaves like that?..

⭐He doesn't know.. but he would sit next to her and with a slightly smiling expression he would put his hand on her hair, softly caressing her head.

⭐He'd meet her eyes and chuckle slightly.

⭐"You're hopeless.. you know that... hehe..♥"

⭐Yohei would be kinda interested to someone like this kind of mc..!

⭐Even if such a troublemaker, he'd find himself chuckling, amused.

⭐She's different from all the other girls he has met..

⭐So he'd find her being interesting.

⭐Of course at first he'd try to calm her down, especially if she's behaving that brat-like with the other TCW members.

⭐"Hey! Clear your mouth while talking to Saimon!! Ya' got it?!?!"

⭐He would never scold her, unless she's overdoing...

⭐In that case mc would see him being very angry and pissed off.

⭐"You're not my leader! I don't have to follow your orders if I don't want to!!"

⭐After hearing something like this, Yohei would surely chuckle, maybe smoking.

⭐Mc would seem an angry and small pomeranian!

⭐"Hehe.. how cute~"

⭐By looking into her eyes Yohei would immediately notice that this is not her true nature..

⭐He would get it.. he would understand that she's actually adorable and kind.

⭐"It's useless that you're trying to act like a brat, mc..."

⭐He'd say while approaching her and maybe even blocking her against the wall.

⭐"We both know that you're simply doing it because you want to get attention..."

⭐He'd whisper to her ear while blowing a vape cloud, still holding her against the wall.

⭐Mc would blush heavily and slowly lose her brat-like look in favour to a flustered and embarrassed look.

⭐"Who knows... maybe my attention....?.. Heh... In this case, you did it.."

⭐Yohei would then slowly pull her closer, kissing her lips.. his hands on her hips.

⭐"You won..."

⭐Anne would be surprised by mc's behaviour.

⭐They would open their eyes wider in response to any bratty sentence or move.

⭐At first they would get protective of their friends..

⭐Especially if they think that mc is trying to mess up with them.

⭐Anne could be teasing with her friends- even if mostly with Hajun- though..

⭐But they care about them.

⭐BAE gave Anne a place where they can be themselves without being scared of being judged..

⭐That's why I'm sure they would enter in a defensive mode if they got the slightest feeling that mc is trying to mess up with them and their friends.

⭐But since Anne is also quite supportive of their friends' uniquenesses...

⭐Well, they would even end up considering mc as one of their friends and support her bratty behaviour!

⭐Of course Anne would give her advices and help her if she needed..

⭐"You're not my leader! I don't have to follow your orders if I don't want to!!"

⭐"Darling..! Just let me give you some tips for a good make-up."

⭐"I don't want to!"

⭐But they wouldn't try to change mc at all!

⭐After all..

⭐Anne would love her for the way she is..!

⭐Also I'm sure they would appreciate realizing that mc keeps a cuddly and cute side only for them!

⭐Anne would be so happy and would feel their heart warmed up as they felt mc unusually cuddling with them.

⭐"Haha... How unusual of you, love..."

⭐They would whisper, while holding her between their arms as they would lie down on the couch together.

⭐Mc would pout and blush heavily, feeling Anne who'd caresses her jaw.

⭐She would hear Anne's chuckle and soon would see their lovingly eyes pointed on her figure.

⭐On the other hand Anne would feel their heart beating faster and a lovely warmth inside their chest.

⭐Thet would think that mc is cute and would kiss her forehead while keeping her as close as they could.

⭐"You're such a lioness, aren't you..? Hehe... You're beautiful.. And adorable while blushing, love..."

⭐"I'm sorry...?"

⭐As the others, even Allen would be surprised by seeing mc behaving that bad!

⭐Like...

⭐Why is she such a brat?..

⭐Contrary to Itsuki and Yohei, Allen wouldn't be pissed off..

⭐.. I'm sure he would apologize and try to make friends with her instead!

⭐Just like he tried with Kanata!

⭐Especially if he thinks that it's worth it, Allen would try his best to get in contact with mc even if at first she behad that bad with him.

⭐Let's remember that Allen is awkward in social situations, though..

⭐So.. he wouldn't know how to start a conversation.

⭐I'm sure he would even be quite hesitant after seeing mc speaking in a brat way to him.

⭐He'd be scared of making mistakes or, on the contrary, he'd speak without thinking, maybe realizing after a while that mc is looking at him with a serious expression.

⭐"W-what...? I... I've said something wrong..? I'm so sorry in that case! It wasn't my intention! Please forgive my impulsivity.."

⭐He'd say chuckling, almost blushing embarrassed.

⭐"You're not my leader! I don't have to follow your orders if I don't want to!!"

⭐ As Allen would hear mc saying that sentence, he would look at her opening his eyes wide.

⭐He would let the silence being between them for an instant before standing up and freeing that strong side of his temper.

⭐"I'm not going to give you orders, mc!!! I simply wanted to be your friend!! But you're making it impossible!!.. Just tell me if you prefer to be alone!!.."

⭐Allen's eyes would be filled with his phoenix's soul's flames as he would speak.. His eyes would be determined.

⭐This would be the first time he would see mc opening her eyes wide in response., a soft blush on her cheeks.

⭐She would feel strange inside...

⭐She would feel warm... Happy... For the first time.

⭐"You... You want to be.. My friend..?"

⭐At the sight of a few tears leaving mc's eyes, Allen would start panicking.

⭐He'd get closer and try his best to comfort her (of course he'd end up being awkward, like patting her shoulder while chuckling nervously...)

⭐"I.. I'm sorry!! I didn't want to make you cry!!"

⭐Soon Allen would see mc crying but pouting too..

⭐He'd hug her and smile softly as he would think..

⭐"She's such a brat but... actually so tender inside... Hehe... she's cute..."

#paradox live #paralive #paradox live headcanons #paradox live headcanon #paralive headcanons #paralive headcanon #paralive bae #bae #allen sugasano #anne faulkner #paralive the cat's whiskers #yohei kanbayashi #paralive 1nm8 #itsuki

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decapitatesyousoftly · 2 years

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I’m not going to lie when I say I'm a huge simp for this man, right here. Yes I know that he’s really problematic, but every slasher is problematic in there own way (besides Bubba sawyer, Jason Voorhees and Carrie white they’re amazing sweethearts)

Dating Otis driftwood would include:

//warning: nsfw-ish, minors DNI//

•Gore. And lots of it, he loves gore and he loves everything that comes with it, organs, bones, brains everywhere. so that kind of stuff grosses you out, you’re out of luck

•you’re going to have to deal with him being A necrophiliac, sorry, but Otis really loves them cold and lifeless.

•you’re going to have to deal with major PDA, so stuff such as, holding your hand, groping you, public sex (When the devil himself wants you, he's going to have you), or his favorite kissing you.

•walks during the midnight hours, after he is done with rituals, talking about stupid things that don't make sense to either of you, but hey nights like these are fun for Otis and you and it definitely makes up for that peace and quiet you to seem to miss out on so often. Thanks to Spaulding, or grandpa Hugo (Most of the noise is caused by Otis, but don’t tell him that)

•Being best friends with Baby which is amazing, Baby is one of those crazy loyal best friends, definitely will steal you from Otis most of the time, because she wants more ’girl time’

•being Otis’s muse, and giving him ideas for his next art piece. Him asking you what he could do to make his work better, etc

• Cutter aka Captain Spaulding is definitely going to be protective of you like he is with Baby and Otis, why?, because your Otis’s S/O and part of the family. the problem with Spaulding being like a protective father figure to you, is that it’s not really that pleasant sometimes, like he’ll definitely watch out of you and have your back, but the moment he helps you out of the situation your in he’ll laugh at you, or tell you how stupid you were. Baby says that's how he shows he cares

• prepare getting degraded a lot, and when i say a lot, I mean A LOT. this man loves degrading people, and just because you’re his S/O doesn’t make you any different. In or out of the bedroom he’s going to call you names ”slut” is his favorite. This doesn’t mean Otis won’t praise you, he will trust me, its just When he’s more in a calm mood. He just likes to see you blush.

•He has a really high text Drive, so if those corpses don't satisfy him. It’s your turn, but in case you’re a masochist, it won’t really feel nice, but he’ll make it up to you with craze in aftercare.

•Be prepared to never talk to any man again, besides the ones that are in the firefly family, this man is definitely obsessive and possessive, hardly lets you leave the house, or even out if his sight. Deep down he’s just really insecure because no one’s ever liked him like you do, especially if you can put up with all the sick, twisted and disgusting things he does and still smile at him with heart eyes. Definitely doesn’t want to share you.

• if a poor victim of the firefly family insult you in anyway, Otis is definitely going to torture them and make it as painful as he possibly can and he’s going to make you watch, because he’s into that kind of thing. He’ll also fuck you next to the victims corpse, but that just Otis being Otis.

• On the contrary of what people think of him, I think he wouldn’t care about what gender his S/O is, or the way they dress, he just wants someone to love him. I also think Otis would be into an S/O who dresses all cute. He likes the idea of him, this gross man loving on someone who’s adorable and loving, but also gross.

I know this is bad, but I really was trying to think for this one, I haven’t been on here in awhile, I needed someway to get The creative juices flowing. Anyways hope you liked his I really tried to keep this as close as i can for canon Otis, even though I know this isn't close to canon.

#house of 1000 corpses #otis driftwood x reader #otis driftwood #slasher boyfriend #slasher boyfriend x reader #slasher headcanons #baby firefly #baby firefly x reader

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stargazer-sims · 11 months

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Journal Entry #53

previously - Journal Entry #52

Victor

"Do you even know what I need?"

I can't believe I said that to my poor husband, especially given how our conversation had been going and the state of mind he was obviously in. Even before the entire sentence was out of my mouth, I regretted it, but unfortunately there was no way to pull it back in.

Several minutes before that, I'd found Yuri in the upstairs bathroom, crying his heart out. I think he was trying to hide from me, but I figured he would've realized by now that he never can. I don't know how I always know when something's wrong with him. I just do, and usually I'm able to help him in some way.

On this night, though? Tonight, not only did I not help, but I possibly made things worse.

Not that anyone else’s opinion has any real impact here, but I want you guys to understand, asking Yuri that question wasn't meant as a rebuke. Although it probably came out sounding that way, I wasn't trying to criticize him.

The truth is, up until recently, he's been giving me exactly what I need, whether he's able to articulate what that is or not. And if he can't put it into words, that's not his fault. It's not as if he's never asked me what I need. He has, but it's my inability to express stuff clearly that's the problem, not his ability to understand, and for me to demand him to explain something that I can barely even explain myself was beyond unfair.

What Yuri does for me, and what I've always needed someone to do, is to help provide stability for me. Sometimes, when I'm scared or stressed or upset, I have a hard time processing my thoughts and regulating my energy. I don't really know how to describe it, but it's like static in my brain, like white noise that makes it nearly impossible for me to hear the part of my mind that controls my impulses and forms logical thoughts. But, Yuri knows how to calm me down when I'm like that. He knows better than anyone what a mess I am, and he always seems to have the ability to sort me out.

Yuri was the one who realized the importance of schedules for me, too. As silly as it sounds, he gave me a regular bedtime and wake-up time, and helped me build other routines into my life that are the same every day. I can't even begin to tell you what a huge difference that's made in terms of how well I'm able to process my emotions and regulate my energy. I guess it's because those are things I don't have to focus on now, so I'm able to devote more brainpower to being a functional human.

Another thing he does is to talk sense into me when I need it. I like to say he's my voice of reason, 'cause I'm not particularly reasonable sometimes.

Being with him has helped me grow as a person. I think I'm more mature because of him, and more responsible. He teaches me by example how to be brave and resilient and emotionally strong. In situations where I'd be likely to give up, Yuri keeps going. As frail and sick as he is, if he can persevere, I have no excuse.

Since he's been really sick this time, though, something's changed. This is the most seriously ill I've ever seen him, and usually when he's not well, he's clingy and needy and just wants to be held and fussed over as much as possible which, contrary to what people may think, I don't mind at all. I haven't been able to take care of him like I normally would, and I'm sure that's affecting him, but it's more than that. I feel like he's been distancing himself from me, and I don't understand why. I've never known him to be as emotionally fragile as he's been over the past several weeks, and I suppose I expected that to lead to him wanting more affection, not less.

Not gonna lie, the lack of physical touch is hard on me, 'cause that's another thing I need. I'm a very tactile person, and Yuri touching me in any way makes me feel grounded and safe, particularly because I know how much of an act of trust it is for him to touch or be touched by anyone. I love it when he gets onto my lap and wants me to hold him, but I'm equally happy when he gives me a hug or plays with my fingers or pets my hair. And I like it when he lets me touch him in any way at all, but especially intimately. It's good to feel trusted. I'm missing that now, and it's starting to hurt me quite a lot.

Yuri didn't answer my question, but I didn't expect him to, since it was kind of rhetorical anyway. The problem was, he cried harder, and the sound of his sobs went straight to my heart. It felt like an invisible knife was stabbing me in the chest, and it took a sheer force of will for me not to start crying as well.

I felt so bad for snapping at him and upsetting him more than he already had been. Yes, I was frustrated and confused, but that didn't justify it.

I know there are people out there who believe he uses emotional manipulation on me. Like, people have said that to my face, so I'm not just being weird or paranoid about it. And yeah, maybe he does do it occasionally, but I've never met another human being who doesn't do it once in a while. But, to anyone who thinks Yuri regularly exploits my sensitivity with fake tears or some other made-up crap, I just wanna remind you that you aren't here with us all the time. You see what we show you, and that doesn't always include the moments of raw, genuine emotional reaction.

I promise you, Yuri's tears tonight were real, not made up to trick me into doing anything. In fact, I got the feeling he would’ve preferred that I wasn’t anywhere near him. Something was hurting him, and I was pretty sure it wasn't his illness. I was afraid it was me.

When he didn't respond after several seconds, I said softly, "I'm sorry."

I could barely hear him as he said weakly, "Go away."

"No," I said. "We need to figure this out.

Finally, he looked up at me. His face was all puffy and swollen, and the edges of his eyes were red. He looked awful, and I just wanted to hold him and soothe away any pain that I could.

"There's nothing to figure out," he said. "You'd be better off without me."

"Yuri." His name was all I could get out at first as I battled my desire to break down in tears. I drew in the deepest breath I was capable of. "Yuri, I need you. Please don't ever say I'd be better off without you, 'cause I wouldn't be. Without you, I... I might not even be here."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"How could you forget?" I said. "Remember the day I came home from the hospital? That night?"

"Yes."

I folded my arms close to my body, but the self-protecting gesture did little to prevent the shiver of dread that went through me at the memory of that night. I'm not sure I really wanted to talk about it, but something in my conscience told me I needed to reveal one particular thing to my husband. It was a secret too big to keep, and I needed him to know, and there might never be a more appropriate time.

"That night... I literally wanted to die, Yuri. Not figuratively. Literally. I would've been perfectly fine with closing my eyes and never waking up."

He stared at me, and the expression that crossed his face was nothing short of haunted. "You...? Literally?"

"Yeah," I said. "I was angry and scared and... I don't know. Desperate, I guess. I felt like my whole life was ruined, just because of one dumb mistake."

"It wasn't," he said. "Didn't I tell you that?"

"I know. You did, and I trusted you. It's the reason I'm here," I said. "But, I think I was out of my mind that night. Like, I wasn't thinking straight at all. I'd never been in that much pain in my entire life, and I was worried that I'd never be able to see again, and everything was just... too much. I know it's nothing compared to the pain you're in sometimes, but I still couldn't handle it. Not like you can."

"I didn't realize," he said. "I wanted to help you settle down because I knew you were upset, but I... I didn't realize..."

"I'm still around because of you," I reiterated, and in a flash of clarity it occurred to me that statement was one hundred percent true.

I don't know if there's a word for how horrible and useless and stupid I felt after my accident. Combine that with an excruciating headache, deep bone pain in both my arms, unrelenting nausea from the medication I was taking, and the absolutely terrifying prospect of permanently losing my vision, and I had a recipe for the end of life as I knew it. In hindsight, it's easy to say I was overreacting, but all I wanted on that first night back at home was for all my pain, both physical and psychological, to disappear.

You know how I explained that my struggles with impulse control and rational thinking are worse when I'm stressed? Left alone that night, it's likely that I would've made a very bad choice, and as a consequence, I wouldn't be here right now to share my thoughts about it. Thankfully, I had Yuri by my side. He couldn't make the pain go away, but he convinced me I could endure it and that it'd eventually pass. He was right, and I'm beyond grateful he was there with me.

I continued with, "You told me that you didn't know what you'd do without me. You said you'd stay by me no matter what, and you promised to take care of me, remember? You promised. What happened to that? Didn't you mean it?"

"Of course I meant it."

"If you meant it, then why are you saying I'd be better off without you now?" I said. "If you thought I needed you a few weeks ago, why wouldn't you still think that?"

"Because I was wrong."

"About what?"

"I wanted to be useful," he said. "I wanted to feel like an equal partner, and I wanted you to be able to trust me to look after you."

"I did trust you," I said. "I do."

More tears began to leak from the edges of his eyes and spill down his face. "I really tried. I tried my best to be strong for you and take care of you, but... I couldn't do it. I can't be equal to you. I can't even do a fraction of what you do.”

“It doesn’t matter if you’re not able to do everything all the time. I get it, and it’s fine.”

“No, it’s not fine, Look what happened to me after only a few days. Other people ended up having to take care of me, and where did that leave my promise to you?"

"You had no control over that," I said. "You did try your hardest, and you were awesome, but we both know you were already starting to get sick before my accident."

"This always happens. It's as if I'm always too ill when you need me the most."

"I need you all the time," I said.

"You don't need me being a burden to you."

"You're not a burden to me. How often am I going to have to tell you that? Taking care of you is a lot, but it's not a burden. I want to do it."

"But, what if I don't want to make your life difficult any more?" he said.

"You're not making my life difficult. If I ever made you feel that way, I'm sorry, 'cause I never meant to. You make my life better, and I'll never not want you in it."

"It... it wasn't you who made me think that," he said.

I held out my good hand to him. "Will you let me touch you?"

He chewed on his lip, clearly wrangling with the decision. I could practically see the debate going on in his head, reflected in his eyes. I could also see the precise moment when he made up his mind.

He crept slowly across the floor toward me, and crawled onto my lap. Wrapping his arms around my body, he leaned into me and rested his head against my shoulder. I held him with my good arm.

He cried for a while, and I stayed quiet, just letting him get it all out. It was plain to see that our situation had been bothering him and that he'd been spending a lot of time thinking about it. I suspected it'd been on his mind for some time, even before his conversation with Seiji, but whatever had happened between them certainly hadn't done anything to improve matters at all.

It infuriated me to think that Seiji had gone to see him in the hospital with the sole intention of telling him off. Of course I knew how Seiji felt — he'd made it perfectly clear that day in the park — but when he said he was going to give Yuri a piece of his mind, I never dreamed it'd be something like that. I thought maybe he'd give him a bit of a hard time for having to work instead of being there to see me compete. I didn't expect he'd go there and air out all his pent-up negativity.

And like... how dare he say Yuri is a terrible person? And how dare he try to interfere in our relationship and tell Yuri that I'm unhappy and that I'd be better off without him? I wanted to give him a huge piece of my mind for that.

Generally, I give people the benefit of the doubt, and I get that Seiji's going through a lot of difficult stuff, but that gives him no right to make everyone else as miserable as he is. Some of us are working hard to be the best versions of ourselves, and nobody needs another person tearing them down.

I decided I'd let it go for the time being. The last thing I wanted was to get into a pointless fight. I have more important things to focus on than Seiji Hinamori's poor behaviour. Besides, I reasoned that I'd get my opportunity to speak to him about it at some point anyway, and maybe it'd be a more productive conversation if we had the benefit of time to calm down and gain some perspective

"I love you," I said, once Yuri's weeping had subsided to sniffling and a few tiny whimpers. "I need you and I want you, and nothing anyone says is ever going to change that. Do you understand?"

He nodded against my shoulder, and said, "Yes, but..."

"No 'buts'," I said. "Maybe it's hard for you to accept hearing this from me right now, but you know what? That's totally okay. Take your time and figure out whatever you need to figure out, but just keep in mind that I'm not going anywhere while you're sorting through it.

He sighed. "Okay." Then, after a second or two, "Victor?"

'Yeah?"

"I really don't deserve you."

"It's not about deserving," I said. "Most of us wouldn't be happy if we got what the powers of the universe or whatever decided that we deserved. Wouldn't you rather have what you need than what you deserve?"

"Are you angry with me?"

"No, I'm not angry," I told him. "I'm worried about you. I'm sorry if you thought I was mad. I'm tired and frustrated, and I guess I could be handling it better, but that's got nothing to do with you. That's just me wishing things would get back to normal faster."

"Me too," he said. "I'm so tired."

"I know, love," I reached up to run my fingers through his hair. "It's okay. You've been through a lot lately."

"So have you.”

“Yeah, but I’m mostly better. Now we’ve got to work on getting you back on your feet.”

“I know I shouldn’t complain,” he said. “But I don’t know if that’s going to happen. Me getting back on my feet. Everything hurts, and I don’t know how to cope with it any more.”

"Saying you're tired or in pain isn't complaining. You’re allowed to say how you feel,” I told him. “It might actually be easier to deal with if you talk about it.”

"I'm too tired to talk. I can’t even think any more."

“Do you want to go to bed now?" I asked. Sleep wasn't the long-term solution, I realized, but if he was mentally tired, at least some sleep would give him a break from whatever turmoil was in his head.

"Yeah," he said.

"Would you like me to sleep in your bed with you, or do you still want to be alone?"

"I never want to be alone," It came out so softly that I wouldn't have caught it if his head hadn't been so close to mine. "Never again. I'm so afraid of that. But I'm scared that if I can't become a worthwhile person, I... I'll be alone... again... forever."

I thought he had run out of tears, but they renewed themselves in the middle of a sentence and left him hiccuping for breath by the end of it. He slumped down onto my legs, as if he didn't have a scrap of strength left to hold himself upright any more.

"Shh... shh..." I rubbed his back the way I know he likes, trying to comfort him. "Listen to me. You are a worthwhile person. You're an amazing person. Don’t I tell you that all the time?”

“Y-yes.”

“We all have stuff to work on,” I said. “If you want to fix some things, I'll help you however I can. Or you can ask for help from a professional if you think that's what you need, or we could talk to somebody together. When you're ready, you just tell me what you want, okay?"

"I want to feel like I’m enough," he whispered.

I pushed away the urge to tell him that he already is enough, that in my eyes, he’s everything. I’m sure he knows how much I love him and I’m equally sure that, deep down, he understands there are a lot of people in his life who do accept him just as he is.

The real problem is that he’s struggling to accept himself.

I don't think his poor self-worth is a new problem. My guess is that it goes back so far that he's forgotten how to think of himself as inherently valuable and is convinced he has to earn approval and validation from others. Except he never can, because when someone praises him or tells him he matters, he doesn't trust that they're telling the truth, because by his own standards it's literally impossible for him to measure up.

I could’ve given him every affirmation I could think of, and he wouldn’t have believed any of them. I wanted to tell him how strong and courageous and resilient he is, how intelligent and practical, and so delicately beautiful that it should be me who calls him 'treasure' and not the other way around. I wanted to say that he doesn't have to be objectively perfect to be perfect for me. But, all those words would’ve been lost if I spoke them aloud just then, and that realization broke my heart.

What I said instead was, "I'm never going to let you go. You're the most important person in the world to me."

With the proper help, I hope that one day when he looks at himself, he'll be able to see what I see when I look at him. Not a single one of us is flawless — not Yuri or me or anyone else — but everyone has something to offer the world. Everyone has value. Each of us means something to someone, whether we recognize that or not, and we each have our own special place in the grand design of the universe.

Sitting there in the middle of our bathroom floor, it occurred to me that I want the same thing for Yuri that he wants for himself. I want him to be happy, and I want him to understand that regardless of his disability, of any personal shortcomings or any mistakes he's made, of any bad thing anyone's said to him or about him — regardless of anything — he is enough.

#ts4 #sims 4 #eagames #snowy escape #victorsworldadventures #victor nelson #yuri okamoto #tw illness #tw suicide mention #stargazersims

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