#while someone else handles expenses isn’t like obviously appealing | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

ohhoworiginalrfaheadcanons · 4 years

Note

Zen and Jumin's weddings

ZEN AND JUMIN'S WEDDINGS

ZEN’S WEDDING

Jaehee

Obviously she was very wary about the possibility of Zen getting married, but by the time that Zen and the MC are getting married she knows those two are going to do their thing even if it's maybe not the wisest thing.

Despite her apprehension, she gets super into the wedding prep from the fandom's side, as it's too good an opportunity not to have a public face for it, and she is going to make sure it's a good one.

She almost ends up in the hospital sick with shock when Jumin gives her two weeks off as a holiday for it, so that she can prepare. It's made a little better when he dumps Elizabeth off on her halfway through. Making sure not to let cat hair get into anything related to the wedding felt close enough to 'normal crunch time' to make her feel reassured.

She tries to remain calm and composed, but it's such a beautiful ceremony, and Zen sparkles like an angel in the sunlight, and she ends up crying anyway.

Yoosung comments that she seems like a mother, and for a brief moment, her soul leaves her body. She hasn't gotten that old, has she?

During the wedding photos, MC pulls her in to pose with them for a few. She can't decide if she's more flattered or mortified, but getting a hug from Zen isn't something she'll ever complain about.

Both the couple and Jumin compliment her for the work she puts in to the wedding, and that's all well and good until she hears Jumin muttering about getting into wedding planning. She knows she heard something about cats.

Yoosung

He's soooooooooooooooooooooo jealous!

sob sob he still doesn't even have a girlfriend when the wedding happens.

Seven offering to dress up as his girlfriend there does not help.

In the end, he invites his guild to the wedding as well, and he does feel a bit better when they're jealous he even knows a girl as cute as her. He got to feel pretty smug about how everyone else was swooning and crushing on her while he was his friend! Just pretend he wasn't once crushing super hard on her.

The wedding feels kind of like some kind of celebrity production? It's fancy and flashy, and not really the kind of wedding he'd want to have, but who is he kidding? He's never getting married, ha ha h a.

Zen basically fastball pitches the garter directly at him and he has no idea what to do. He hyperventilates a bit, actually.

There's! Free! Honey Buddha Chips!

He almost vomits from overeating those, and has to sit down and think about his choices during the dance. No more Honey Buddha Chips for him for a good long time. At least a whole weekend.

He gets a little teary-eyed in the end, though, because a few years ago he never would have imagined that the RFA could have lasted this long, that everyone could come back from that cliff he'd seen, where everyone was about to fall off and fall apart. Somehow, ever since the MC appeared, everyone's lives got better, even if Zen was the only one who ended up with a girlfriend (wife! aaaa, so romantic!) out of it, and they could all stand together in a wedding now, with bright futures for everyone.

He can't help but be inspired to follow his dreams, too, even if working for C&R is harder than he expected it to be.

He's still mad that V couldn't be bothered to come and see the wedding, though. Jerk.

Jumin

He insists on funding it. Zen fights with him over it for a bit, but when he points out just how expensive it would be to cater to the rather large fanbase Zen has amassed, given that Zen decided to invite all of creation to his wedding, he eventually wins the argument. Obviously.

It's the first time he's been someone's best man, even if the offer is...unusually angry, for the subject matter.

It's not the first time he's been asked to be one, but it is the first time he actually gets to be one.

He doesn't need any woman in his life other than Elizabeth the 3rd, but he is happy to see two friends of his so happy. Love isn't really something he puts much stock into, but if there were any two people whom he could believe in when it comes to that, it's the two being married.

Although he's not as...expressive...as some of the other RFA around, he's extremely happy for them, to the point that there's a warmth in his chest that feels like it might burst out. Zen says his face looks weird, at some point, and the MC elbows Zen hard enough to knock the breath out of him.

He imagines the photos they pose for in the wedding are much like the ones in the wedding that hadn't had the chance to happen.

He chooses to believe that if V were there, his old friend would have had a wonderful time. Undoubtedly, he would have demanded to be the wedding photographer. Perhaps because of that, he finds himself often distracted by meaningless thoughts, except when MC or Zen would grab his arm or hand and yank him off into some other frivolity related to the celebration.

It isn't so bad to attend a wedding every once in a while, if it's one of his friends'.

He accidentally drinks a little too much, and at some point in the evening he's rather certain Assistant Kang physically pushes him out of a room when he'd been in serious negotiations with Luciel about an intriguing business prospect. His memory of the event is too hazy to be certain, however, so he chooses not to address it later.

Somehow he ends up in the wrong car and falls asleep in the married couple's limousine instead of his own.

Obviously he ignores Zen's annoyed lecture in the morning.

MC makes a radiant wife, and even he appreciates her bashful smile when he says so, right up until Zen forcibly ejects him from their dwelling.

Zen

He can't believe this is actually real!

It's not just a dream, it's not even one of his prophetic ones. It's real. It's actually happening. After looking forward to this and hoping for it for so long, after having to delay this for years and apologize to his disappointed girlfriend, finally! Finally he can put a ring on her hand and declare to the world "Hands off! This here is Zen's wife, and she's perfect!"

His agent and Jaehee were both pretty worried about what it might do to his career to be publicly married, given how important his sex appeal and the female part of his fanbase is...but even if it means he'll never reach his full potential and they'll just have to survive on small gigs forever, he wanted to spend his life with MC. And that meant marrying her. In public. Not in hiding. He wouldn't do that to her.

Jumin of course stuck his nose in and demanded to pay for it...and...whatever. He guesses it's not such a bad deal. Not having to worry about a budget means that it'll give Jaehee the freedom to set things up as she needs to, and it means he can also give MC whatever wedding it is she dreams of. Even if it's a blow to his pride if what she wants is something he couldn't personally afford without Jumin's help.

Why was he even worried? Of course she doesn't. Her dream is just to be with him, no matter what that means, and he clutches his heart and wonders what the hell he'd ever done to deserve someone so perfect in his life.

It's a roaring success, the wedding. Really, it's a huge turn out, and he basks in all the attention and adulation, no doubt.

But it's his love and his friends that really matter to him.

If someone told him years ago he'd ask Jumin Han, Mr. Trust Fund Kid, to be his best man at his wedding he'd have laughed and then punched that person in the face. Because it'd probably be 7. What a wild ride the world has been since meeting the MC. Making up with Jumin Han is almost more stunning than getting married, honestly.

Yoosung looks a little lost and upset, and while he now #cantrelate, he actually can.

He's not sure how much he trusts superstitions like that specifically, but it doesn't hurt to make sure he knows who gets the garter belt. Maybe Yoosung could find a cute gamer nerd girl somewhere in C&R? That's possible, right?!

It's basically picture perfect, but then they could have gotten married in an alley with a bunch of stumbling drunks and it would have felt perfect if she were beside him.

That does not mean he was willing to take Seven's suggestions about how to handle the venue, though. He's a romantic, but he's not crazy.

Has he ever seen Jumin Han drunk before? Has the world ever seen it before? He's not sure, but it's kind of funny, and his wife - oh wow, it's his wife now, he has a wife! - finds it cute. Aside from a briefly terrifying moment when someone gave Jumin a cat ear headband, it's fairly harmless anyway. It's not bad to see even the Trust Fund Kid loosen up and act like a normal person.

Right up until the damn fool ends up passed out in their car and not waking for the end of the world.

obviously he drags the trust fund kid in to sleep on the couch overnight, not in the car, but missing out on a proper wedding night is almost enough to reignite his rivalry with Jumin Han. If he can't handle his liquor then he needs to be more careful about drinking it, dammit!

His wife is, frankly, way too understanding.

But that's not the worst thing in the world for a wife to be.

It means she doesn't have any problem pretending that the morning after is the wedding night before.

707

This venue SUCKS.

If they'd asked him, he'd have set up an AWESOME WEDDING HALL. Maybe on a mountain top in the alps? Maybe in a deep sea submarine? It's be frankly awesome. The wedding guests would have to go on a three day trek through Tibet, a harrowing adventure in a rainforest, and retrieve a hidden treasure for their invites. No one would forget the wedding he planned.

For some reason, he was completely banned from even making suggestions about the wedding.

rude, honestly.

He shows up despite that, because he's just that good of a friend, even though it means sneaking out in the middle of a job and leaving a robot version of himself as a decoy to fool his maid. Okay, maybe especially because it was skipping out on work, but mostly it was just to show up and support his friends!

Also free food.

Obviously he catered all the honey buddha chips! But besides the stuff he brought, there's still a bunch of free food, and a smart man doesn't turn down free food.

Yoosung probably should consider doing that, though, as the poor kid looks pretty green there halfway through the reception. 7, great friend that he is, sticks around and comforts Yoosung until a garter basically smacks Yoosung directly in the face.

It's hard to be comforting when he can no longer breathe. He hasn't laughed that hard in ages!

It feels pretty good, honestly. Seeing Zen succeed, seeing the party coordinator fit in and find her place so well in the RFA. For a little while he'd started to believe that maybe all the good, happy days of the RFA were in the past, but then the MC appeared, and...er...despite that little bomb mishap, things had really turned around and the world had brightened.

Well, actually his life is pretty much the same as it's always been. But seeing the RFA perk up, and watching them all succeed and be happy?

It makes him happy.

The tears in his eyes are from laughter when he accidentally beans the CEO-in-line in the face with a handful of rice.

Oh man wouldn't it be funny if Jumin Han ended up in the wrong car?

JUMIN'S WEDDING

Jaehee

Weirdly enough, she's not expected to do any work to prepare for the wedding. He takes an entire month off for the wedding, which gives her waking nightmares up until he also gives her the time off as well. She's tempted not to agree, because C&R might well burn down if both of them were gone for so long...but the chances of the Chairman actually firing anyone over his son's wedding are low enough for her to go along with it.

She politely declines the offer to be the Maid of Honor, but appreciates the gesture.

Elizabeth is chosen as it instead and she immediately regrets her choices. Partly for Zen's sake. The MC is clearly a bad influence on the corporate heir, given how utterly amused she looks about this, and that it was apparently the woman's suggestion, not Jumin's.

Alas, it's too late to stop the wedding.

It goes without saying that the wedding is so extravagant that she's pretty sure she'd spend half of the budget of her entire year just on the ceremony, even with out the reception. But part of that is because the Chairman chose to sponsor it, as a gesture of approval for his son's union.

It's for the best, because it keeps the wedding from being entirely cat themed.

It's not really her place, but she's never seen the Chairman look so genuinely proud of Jumin before as when he stood in the wedding hall. Well, it's a relief to see that their relationship seems to be repaired.

There's of course plenty of press outside the venue, but there's more than enough security to keep them all outside. Only the RFA and other friends and family are allowed inside, and that's probably for the best given...the cat maid of honor thing.

She doesn't think that's the kind of kiss a groom is supposed to give the bride.

She's never seen her boss so happy.

Maybe this will be the end of cat related business opportunities?

It's not.

Zen

HE'S SO MAD

AAAA WHY THIS TRUST FUND KID?!

She's clearly happy, though. He can't say he approves of how quickly they rushed into marriage - getting engaged after only knowing each other for two weeks?! CRAZY. It's crazy!

He comes to the wedding anyway, and immediately regrets it. Why the hell is the furball there?! It's like the man is turning the wedding into some kind of a joke! It makes him want to pick a fight with the man right then and there!

He doesn't.

But he's tempted to.

It has nothing to do with the fact that Jumin is constantly guarded by the furball, okay?

He sneezes through their vows, and it serves Jumin 100% right. If he could have managed to breathe properly, the deathly look Jumin turns on him would have been returned with a smirk.

But he can't, because he can't breathe.

Because CAT.

DAMMIT THE RECEPTION IS CAT THEMED TOO

CAT PLATES

THE CAKE IS SHAPED LIKE THE FURBALL

THIS IS HELL.

But...it is good to see the RFA happy, especially MC. It's just that he can barely see that through all of his sneezing.

THE FURBALL

ATTACKED

HIM

He doesn't remember what happens after that.

When he wakes up in bed, the Trust Fund Kid and the MC are sitting nearby.

He has literally no idea of how he got home, and neither of them bother to explain it. They're up and out pretty shortly after, because they have business to attend to.

He's really, really, really sure he knows what the smirk Jumin gives him means, and it takes all he has not to drop kick the newly married heir.

What a jerk.

Yoosung

He's jealous!

The wedding hall looks like something out of a fairy tale, even more majestic than the most expensive wedding hall that players can rent out in LOLOL. He's not even the bride and even he feels kind of like a princess going into it!

He doesn't know why, but they ask him to be the best man, and he feels so fancy up there that he almost starts speaking in an old-fashioned way.

Honestly? He's not sure how he feels about the fact that the Maid of Honor is actually Elizabeth...but well, MC gives him such a glowing and supportive smile, and Jumin also seems to be so approving of him that he supposes he can choose not to feel insulted that he apparently is on the same level as a literal cat.

He also gets to pet the cat, which is kind of nice? Now that he's just 'visiting' the cat, anyway, and not expected to take care of it or have it rolling all over his expensive equipment.

For some reason, V is apparently too busy to stay the whole ceremony, but he does show up to take photos anyway. It does make sense that V would be the wedding photographer, though.

Yoosung still disapproves that V can't be bothered to stay the whole time. Surely he would have been the best man otherwise?!

The press outside is pretty scary, but those security guards keep them at bay, and hey! He recognizes one of them! The guard even waves at him.

There's more food than he's seen in his entire life at the reception. There's also honey buddha chip bags! SCORE!

When it comes time for wedding gifts, Jumin actually gives him a gift instead. That's confusing enough on its own, but when he opens it he gets even more confused. Pl-playbo-?!

Oh, no, it's something called "Expert Playboy", which seems to be some kind of a magazine about...how to be high society or something.

Well, the gesture is thoughtful! Even if Jumin is kind of blunt about the fact that he needs to study those to get a girlfriend. But then again...? It's also nice if he could get a girlfriend from it.

He's probably overly emotional because of how the day is, but he can't help crying a little in happiness when he sees how everyone is together again. It'd been pretty hard to believe things would turn out this way back before the MC arrived, or even during the crisis that followed, but...somehow everyone made it through, and even if it was kind of surprising to see a wedding so soon (but it's romantic~! Aa~) it gives him hope for the future.

707

He's happy for them. Honestly. Kinda weird that they rushed into it, but who was he to judge?

He's officially given up the right to judge anyone anymore. Ever. At all.

It's a hard decision to actually go to the wedding, since he's not feeling very joyful even then, but he's done enough of not being there for people who are important to him to last for one life time, he might as well make it for the wedding. Besides, he knows the RFA well enough to know that if he skips out, even with a good excuse, they'll all worry, and someone might actually physically come by and pick him up.

It might be V, which means his security won't even keep them out.

The wedding is on short notice, and he has no idea what to get for The Couple Who Has Everything, so he resolves to buy the first thing he sees for sale on the way to the wedding hall.

It's...a...cactus? He gets them a cactus. MC, angel that she is, takes it like it was actually a thoughtful gift. (hesnotjealoushesnotjealoushesnotjealous)

He gets to realize at least part of his dream: he bursts into the wedding hall a little late on purpose, shouting "I OBJECT TO THIS WEDDING!"

He mistimed it, so it's too early for that. That's awkward. But he rolls with it anyway. At the very least he can still rush the altar and take Elly away by the paw, even if she's not the bride.

Getting physically thrown out of the wedding hall while over the top shrieking is hashtag-worth-it.

He's still let into the reception afterward, because his friends are too good for him, honestly.

It's hard to believe that there's anything but darkness in his future, but seeing even Jumin Han lovestruck and married...maybe it's not totally impossible for things to turn around in a way he never expected, and end up with a happy ending for him, too?

Probably not.

She's radiant, glowing like an angel in the reception, and who is he kidding? He's absolutely jealous that she picked Jumin over him, but...hah. It wasn't really like there was ever an actual competition going on. That whole thing was all in his mind. And anyway, a person who abandoned his other half didn't deserve to find a different other half.

There's a zero percent chance that he's not going to find a way to prank Yoosung about those strange magazines Jumin gave him.

Jumin

The wedding needs to be perfect. No expense will be spared. He's done research, he knows what these kinds of weddings look like, and he's going to make sure it's the most absolutely extravagant and beautiful ceremony possible, because nothing less than that can hope to express his love for her. He wants nothing less than a wonderland that will earn those beautiful smiles from her at every turn.

He'd like for V to be best man, but his old friend is feeling too frail for that, and so while he promises to come and take pictures, he can't accept the honor of being best man.

It's briefly horrifying when MC suggests it should be Zen instead, but they ultimately agree on Yoosung. Perhaps it will give him motivation to further his studies and make a man of himself.

When Assistant Kang refuses to be the Maid of Honor, the MC goes into a giggling fit that ends with her on the floor, suggesting Elizabeth the 3rd do it. It's a thoroughly silly suggestion, but it brings her such glee that he can't deny it. It's probably for the best they didn't choose Zen for the best man.

The wedding isn't anywhere close to the perfect plan. Elizabeth wanders off from where she was meant to sit in the middle of the ceremony and Assistant Kang has to retrieve her before they can continue. Zen purposefully sneezes through their vows in an overwrought protest, and at one point Luciel breaks into the wedding hall and tries to kidnap Elizabeth. Zen almost certainly only drags the hacker out as an opportunity to get away from Elizabeth.

It's a horrifying train wreck.

Yet, he's never seen the MC look so happy before. His father speaks kindly to her, without any hint of his usual philandering nature.

She's the most beautiful creature he's ever laid eyes on.

When she smiles up at him, he forgets anyone else is around, and he needs no prompting to kiss his bride. Although, perhaps, in retrospect maybe he should have been more considerate and conscious of those around him when he does so. But then again...no.

From now on, the concerns of his wife supersede anything else. She will be the #1 in his life, from this point onward. Forever.

This is the life he wants for her: one where she is first in everything. One where she is given all that she could ever desire. One where she will never need to question whether she is loved.

Although he kept them out of the wedding hall itself, the press is waiting outside, of course. The heir in line of C&R and his new wife, alongside the current CEO of C&R would make news no matter what. And that's just fine with him. The world should see his beloved, and how beautiful she is. The world will, in fact, see her. He's sure of that. Never so much to overwhelm her, but enough to ensure no one would ever question that she is his one and only. That he may not deserve her, but she deserves everything.

The reception goes much better than the wedding, fortunately. Assistant Kang ends up with the bouquet, looking quite confused. Luciel behaves better in the reception hall than the wedding one, and even provides a gift.

It's...puzzling, but he seems genuinely proud of it.

His new wife is quite happy with it.

His wife.

This woman, the only one to understand him, the one to help him detangle all the threads in his mind, this woman is his wife.

In a way he already is, but a part of him quite literally wishes to climb onto a rooftop and shout out to the world that she is his wife now, his love, and the one he will spend his life with. No one else but her.

He thinks it's a rather frivolous thought, but V calls it romantic, and smiles in a more genuine and warm way than he's seen his old friend smile in a while.

He fails to convince V to get the eye surgery just yet, but...V does happily take photographs for the wedding, and seeing his friend taking photos again - enjoying himself once more - is a greater gift than he could ever ask for.

It's all quite wonderful, until Elizabeth the 3rd - apparently - hops into Zen's lap expecting attention. He isn't sure why she does this. Perhaps she was confused? Perhaps she simply wondered why the man continued making so much noise and sought to comfort or silence him? Whatever the case, the man has a public meltdown and ends up on the floor in a rather disgusting mess of snot and tears.

It's probably wrong to leave him there, yes.

Instead, he has Driver Kim pick up the man and return him back to his house.

His wife truly is kind, looking over the semi-conscious man and ensuring he has allergy medicine until he comes to.

It doesn't take particularly long overall, but he still cannot help but enjoy watching his new wife as she moves around the room and the bed, taking care of his most troublesome friend. Truly, he cannot measure the fortune and luck that he has stumbled into by meeting her, by loving her, and by her loving him in return. Nothing in his life can truly compare.

It seems he is visibly lovestruck, as he's caught out of his daze by the feel of her lips on his cheek, just before Zen stirs and wonders in confusion as to where he's ended up.

He imagines it's quite understandable even to Zen why he's in a hurry to wrap things up and return home with his new wife.

It is after all, their wedding night.

And he is quite finished with spending nights away from his love.

#jumin han #mysme zen #mysme #mystic messenger #rfa headcanons #707 #yoosung kim #jaehee kang #chairman han #mysme v #zen x mc #jumin x mc #mysme mc #libralita

126 notes · View notes

ofvellichorandverbosity · 3 years

Text

champagne problems - ch. 1

The humidity felt sticky on her skin, but Cam didn’t seem to notice. She had never been one for the details of a situation--or well, some situations. She was quick to call out the mistakes in an engineering formula or point to the structural flaws in a design--little things like that never slipped by her. The world of science and numbers had a rhythm all on its own, something that the blonde had always seemed to find her groove in.

Relationships though...well, those were another story.

“So that’s when I said ‘BOOM’! You looking for this?” A large pair of fists slammed on the table, causing the flatware to jump a few inches in the air with surprise. Blinking back her focus on the man in front of her, Cam smiled politely, trying to figure out when she should say that repeating a story from a Marvel movie wasn’t impressive when you’ve seen said movie six times.

Apparently, she didn’t need to say anything, because a dark cloud passed over his face and his brows knitted in frustration. “Were you even listening? God, it’s always the same with you blondes--head in the clouds, too ditzy to spend five minutes listening to someone else’s story.” His breath came out rushed and he glared into her soul.

Correction: his glare tried to stare into her soul. There had to be a soul there in the first place--one thing that Camryn Ross was pretty sure she no longer had.

Maybe she never had one--that wouldn’t surprise her. She’d never been the best with connecting to folks. The dark, tortured brand wasn’t something that just happened overnight. She’d spent a long time crafting this persona, even before she’d met….

No. She had a rule and she’d be damned if she’d break it, especially in front of man baby and his fragile ego.

Her eyes lifted to meet his, her own gaze icy cold. “If it’s always the same with us blondes, why do you keep picking us?”

He twisted his lip, obviously surprised that she’d chosen to engage in his insult. “Well, you might be stupid but y’all are a pretty good lay.”

Cam rolled her eyes, a sigh of disgust passed through her lips. “God, men are such pigs. Is that really all you think about? I should have known--men like you only have one brain and Lord knows it’s not located on your shoulders.”

The man learned forward, his perfectly swoopy hair starting to come loose from his gel prison. “Listen here, bitch. I have a degree from Harvard, you’d better believe I’ve got more intelligence in my left pinky than you do in your whole body.” He sneered.

“So they’re just giving those away now?” She raised her brow, taking a piece of her bread and ripping off a piece casually. She popped it in her mouth and scrunched her nose. “Hm, maybe I should get in line.”

A manicured finger appeared in front of her nose. “You’re lucky I even went on this date with you--your brother begged me to take you out, since no one else wants you. Can’t imagine why--you’re such a peach.”

As bored as Cam was attempting to act (a sure fire way to piss off preppy boys with big bank accounts), she couldn’t deny his words stung deeply. She knew Charlie probably hadn’t begged this asshole to take her out but she knew he had asked him a few times. He was worried about her--fine. Whatever. But did his worry have to come with a douchecanoe and no oar? And did this guy have to say the truth so loudly?

“Oh, aren’t you a charmer.” She scrunched her nose as she took a sip of water. “It’s true what they say about southern gentleman--such ladies men.” She pushed herself from the table and placed her napkin on the plate. “Does your momma know you talk to women like this?

“But you’re right. Lucky me, for I got to sit in front of the biggest jerk this side of the Mississippi for an hour as he talked about nothing but himself--including a terribly plagiarized version of the War Machine story from Avengers: Age of Ultron.” His face turned ashen and she just shrugged. “Yeah, I noticed. You aren’t sly, y’know. Lucky me, for I got to listen to you insult my intelligence, my appearance and I guess my datability. As if being interesting to assholes like you is what I live for. So yeah, consider me a fuckin’ lottery winner.”

She moved toward the exit, sending the waitress an apology and slipping her a 20 for her time. She didn’t need this man to feel whole, Cam reminded herself. She was just fine on her own--she had been for years. Men like him--their perfect, flawless face, their lined pockets of glittering gold, their expensive educations and fancy pants jobs and unattainable secret rules--they were nothing but trouble. Big, fat, stupid, I-told-you-so trouble.

And heartbreak.

As she reached the door of her 2002 Jeep Wrangler--her pride and joy, fixed up from the junkyard all on her own--another hand wrapped around the handle and she looked up.

“Cam, seriously. How many guys are you gonna keep putting up with before you tell your brother to stop meddling?”

A heavy sigh escaped her lips as she looked back at Sawyer--her best friend, her trusted confidant, and her favorite underpaid date security detail. Not that, in all honesty, Cam really needed a security guard. She was more than capable of getting wayward men flat on their back--and not in the fun kind of way. But Sawyer had insisted that he hang by, if only to crack jokes on the whole car ride home. Something about the way he was so pushy about this idea made Cam think that he knew more about herself than she did--but she didn’t feel like digging around in that garden.

“Have you tried telling Charlie to stop doing anything? It’s like asking a pig to fly--it cannot be done. He’d just get all wiggy and start being more intense about the whole thing. At least this way he can say he tried before he dies of a premature death due to his worry over me.” Cam shoved him out of the way and opened the door. “Now, are you getting in or walking?”

In a flash, Sawyer was next to her in the car--his face a mix of amusement and annoyance. “Cam, please tell me you know you can do better than Harvard Hack over there. That man was as interesting as a piece of rotting flotsam on Myrtle. Even if he is pretty.” Sawyer had this tendency to use marine terms in everyday life--but she supposed she couldn’t blame him. Unlike her, he’d found a job that aligned with his passions. How could she be mad that he was living his dream?

“Yeah yeah yeah--now let’s go before Trust Fund Baby gets it in his mind to start screaming at me. I don’t need a repeat of the last guy.”

“What happened to him?”

“Turns out a black eye doesn’t go well with linen suits.” The engine reeved and they tore out of the parking lot, leaving the awful man huffing over his own rejection.

“Violence isn’t the answer, C.” Sawyer chastised softly and she cackled loudly.

“No, but alcohol is a solution.” She tilted her head to the bright neon sign on Sawyer’s side of the street. Pulling into a parking spot, she hopped out of the Jeep and ran a hand through her hair. “Now, let’s solve this problem, shall we?” A resigned groan fell from Sawyer’s lips as she tugged him along.

Cam loved dive bars--she loved the smell, the feel, the stories that were etched into the exposed beams. Perhaps it wasn’t completely true that Cam was bad at relationships--she had always been close with Karla, the local bartender. She was a good listener, and while Cam never said anything she would tell another person--she got the impression that if she ever did, Karla wouldn’t judge her. Maybe.

“Well there you are--I was beginning to get worried. My regular not showing up on Two For Tuesdays? I was ready to call up the sheriff to put a warrant on you.” Karla winked as she slid two shots her way--whiskey, of course. If Cam was going to play the part of a tormented individual, nothing better to stoke those demons than some Jack Daniels.

“Wouldn’t be the first, babe.” She winked and shot the amber liquid back. She didn’t used to drink whiskey. In fact, she wouldn’t be caught dead drinking anything that wasn’t clear or fruit flavored. But reality bit her in the ass in a real way and suddenly she preferred the burn of the alcohol to the searing pain of a heart ache.

“How you can do that astounds me. That shit is nasty.” Sawyer shook his head, sipping his pina colada with a little dance. Sawyer had never much cared about what people thought of him--especially if he liked something. Why refuse yourself something you enjoy just because someone else doesn’t? That’s silly. He’d often remind her, through slurred words after his fifth pina. He had a point, Cam knew that. But also--some opinions weren’t meant to be challenged.

“It’s not hard.” In fact, it’s more appealing than alternative. “You just don’t think about it.” Any of it. You don’t think about the burn, you don’t think about the smoky aftertaste. Not about the way his blue eyes reflected candlelight perfectly or the way his nose wiggles when he was particularly amused. Definitely not how his laugh was so effervescent that you could pick it out in the middle of a crowd---

Cam nearly dropped her shot glass straight on the ground, but Sawyer caught it just in time. “Cam?”

No, no no no. Her breathing became shallow and she felt her entire body shrink back into herself as she heard the laugh again. No, no--this is just me imagining this. There’s no--no way…

“Vodka Martini, please.” The voice was as smooth as she had remembered it and Cam willed herself to keep her back toward the man. Sawyer looked ready to open his mouth again and without thinking, the blonde kicked him hard. She placed her finger up to her lips and motioned slightly to the man. He was confused--and in a large amount of pain--but he stayed quiet.

“And another whiskey for the lady--though in a past life it would have been a sex on the beach, no?”

The color drained from her face and she closed her eyes. If this was a nightmare, it was time for her to wake up. Slowly, she turned her body to face him, her entire brain on high alert.

“Camryn Ross.” He said her name softly, gently--and if she wasn’t mistaken, a hint of reverence? Her heart hammered in her chest as she searched desperately for words.

As she opened her mouth, though, words were not what came out. Instead, it was the contents of her meal and the whiskey shot she took earlier. All over the bar, the barstools and--worst of all--his shoes.

Oh fuck. She cursed. Now that was an intro.

#fic: champagne problems #original work #romance #cam ross & dylan darcy

0 notes

texanredrose · 7 years

Text

Served

Yang took a deep breath in and let it out slowly, trying to calm herself. The lunch rush brought with it a seemingly endless stream of customers and that proved true every single day she worked, yet today the demands of her job seemed to wear on her more than usual. Being a server at a high end restaurant in downtown Vale brought with it all sorts of upscale types, each with some sort of previous knowledge that either proved to be wrong entirely, greatly exaggerated, or simply misunderstood, yet she could only politely explain that so many times before it drove her over the deep end.

“Remember why you’re doing this. Rent is due in a week and you need the tip money,” she said to herself, reaching up to straight the long black tie she wore around her neck and adjusting the stifling collar of her crisp white shirt. As far as work uniformed went, it tended towards the plain side, with black slacks and matte shoes, but at least she’d gotten out of that dive bar on the south side of town. The pay here was better, even if the uniform kinda sucked, but the customers always seemed the same. Not as crude, not as dirty themselves, but really no better for it. “Just. Get through. This shift.”

“Psyching yourself up, Yang?” Emerald, one of the other servers, breezed past her on the way to the pick up station, a small smirk on her lips. “That table giving you problems, huh?”

“Bunch of yuppies who can’t tell a lager from a porter; if they weren’t so chatty, I’d be fine.” Rolling her eyes, the blonde followed her coworker to the station, grabbing one of the serving trays and loading it up with plates for another table. “I’ll be fine.”

“They’re really giving you problems over beer?” The other woman grabbed an appetizer but paused before taking it out.

She shook her head. “Nah, they’re trying to ‘impress me’ with their ‘experienced taste’ because they’re a bunch of ‘beer connoisseurs’ apparently.”

“Okay, why does every group of twenty-somethings flirt with you?” Her coworker chuckled, obviously taking a bit too much amusement from her misery. “They think just because you’re their age, they have a shot?”

“I’m willing to bet it’s because they have money and they think that’s impressive.” With a fully loaded tray, she set one edge on her shoulder and balanced it aloft while grabbing one of the fold out stands. “Whatever. Sometimes, it gets me a nice tip, so I’ll let ‘em have their fun.”

“So you’re not going to punch anyone today?”

“I make no promises,” she replied with a smirk before setting out, navigating her way through the dining area. Thankfully, the layout of the restaurant gave her more than enough room to maneuver between the tables, reaching a booth tucked away in her area and setting down the stand, putting the tray on top of it and handing out the plates with a smile.

Out of the corner of her eye, she saw the host bring over more customers to sit in the booth two down and mentally kicked herself; now she had a completely full section and those brats at the table were snapping their fingers for her again. She swore, if she ever met their mothers, she’d give ‘em a piece of her mind.

“Alright, everything look right?” She flashed a smile at the customers in the booth now positively salivating- in a very classy way, she admitted- over their food. “How about you cut into that steak for me, Sir, to make sure it’s right.”

The man did as requested, popping the little piece he’d cut off into his mouth before giving her a nod. “It’s perfect.”

“Great!” Yang tucked the tray under one arm and grabbed the stand with her other hand. “I’ll be back to check on you in a bit.” Moving off, the blonde took a mental break while keeping her smile in place as she moved to her new booth. At a glance, she could tell the table would only be a little hassle. Two women- one right around her age and the other a little older- wearing expensive looking clothing that matched, white being the predominant color accented by either blue or black. They both had pure white hair and blue eyes, barely visible as they scanned their menus, and Yang guessed they were probably related somehow- sisters or cousins, probably. “Good afternoon, Ladies. May I suggest a glass of wine this afternoon?”

The older of the two- wearing a suit with glossy black boots, a tight almost military looking bun, and with sharper features than the other woman- looked up, blue eyes flicking over the server’s form before meeting her gaze. “And what suggestion would that be, I wonder?”

“Well, if you’re asking my honest opinion...” She glanced at the two of them, going with her gut as she always did. According to her customers, she had something of a knack for picking out the particular drink for the occasion. That’s why she suggested wine instead of the specialty beer they’d just imported from Atlas- not just because they certainly seemed like they hailed from or at least had strong family ties to the country across the sea of Vale but because, as a restaurant that specialized in Atlesian dishes, it was pretty much part of their gimmick. They seemed like the wine sort, and particular in that regard as well. “A bottle of Domaine Weinbache to split.” She thought on it. “We have their Riesling, which would pair rather nicely with our grilled citrus shrimp or the red snapper, now that I think on it.”

“Let me guess: that’s the most expensive sort you sell here, isn’t it?” The younger woman- an offset pony tail, thigh high boots, and a skirt showing off only a sliver of well toned thighs- scoffed, rolling her eyes. Only then did Yang notice the faded scare bisecting the left one.

“Actually, the Chevalier Montrachet we have is our most expensive, but that’s more for a special occasion or celebration.” The blonde set the stand down, leaning against the booth, and pulled out her pen and tab. “You two ladies seem more interested in a nice, pleasant lunch on this fine Vale day, and the Domaine Weinbache is a nice balance between your exceptional taste and the casual nature of the meal.”

Again, the younger of the two seemed unimpressed. “Are you always so quick to pour flattery over others.”

Yang’s mask slipped a little, the first thing that came to mind slipping out of her mouth before she could stop it. “Gee, with all your whining, I feel like I should just bring out the cheese.”

While one looked at her with absolute shock, the other laughed, lifting a hand to cover her mouth.

“Why you-”

“Weiss.” The older woman recovered, though she still had a smile on her lips. “That was a rather rude comment. She’s only doing her job and I asked for her suggestion.”

Another roll of the eyes. “I suppose you’re right.”

“Of course I am,” she replied, turning towards Yang. “We’ll take a bottle of the Domaine Weinbache, please. And an order of breadsticks to start.”

Yang jotted the order down. “Alright, I’ll be back with that in a sec.” She tucked her pad and pen away, picking up the stand. “My name’s Yang, by the way. If you need anything, please let me know!”

Turning away, she went to input the order and replace the tray and stand, fingers hovering on the button for the shrimp she’d suggested. While it would be one of their best dishes to pair with the wine, she also got the distinct impression that the older woman would go for something with a bit more substance- perhaps one of their steaks- while her sister seemed more inclined towards a salad or perhaps chicken.

Sending the order off, Yang went over to the bar, gathering up two wine glasses, the chilled bottle from an ice box under the bar, and a corkscrew. Someone else had already brought them glasses of water, so she could deliver the wine and give them a few minutes to look over the menu while she attended to her problem table. She could already tell they were going to make some sort of snide comment about the fact that she hadn’t stopped by their table in a whopping five minutes- one would think they’d be more concerned about eating but she’d been wrong before- and braced herself, setting down the wine glasses and uncorking the bottle in practiced, smooth motions. Flipping the corkscrew around, she offered the newly revealed cork towards the women.

The younger one appeared surprised, brows raising as she tilted her head slightly, while the other just smiled, accepting the corkscrew and smelling the aroma wafting off the cork.

“Sweet, but not enough to make me crave dessert yet. A little fruity, but there’s a subtle bite to it.” She nodded. “I do believe you’re correct in saying it would pair well with citrus.”

“Thank you, Ma’am.” Yang set about pouring the glasses, ignoring the louder snaps attempting to get her attention, instead leaving the bottle in a holder on the table while taking the corkscrew. “May I give you a few moments to look over the menu?”

“That sounds splendid, thank you.”

The women turned their attention to their wine as the blonde turned around and went to the table, just a few feet away, and praying her smile seemed at least somewhat sincere. “So, how are we doing? Anyone need a refill?”

“What I need is a halfway decent beer,” one of the boys said- they were probably around her age, so they weren’t children exactly, but they sure as hell acted like it- with a sneer curling his lips. “This almost tastes like piss water.”

“Sir, you requested a light blonde-”

“Well, then, bring me a dark beer,” he replied with a grimace. “Don’t you know anything about appealing to a refined taste?”

Most days, Yang could handle types like this. But today, she had a bit of a vengeful streak going, and no real reason not to continue it. “Well, Sir, we do have a Rauchbier from Atlas.” She’d noticed the glances every man at the table threw towards her newest customers and silently relished being able to reach people so effectively. “I will warn you, though, it’s very dark, but it’s-”

“We’ll take a round.”

“Sir-”

“Are you deaf as well as dumb?” He glowered at her. “I said we’ll take a round! Now, chop chop!”

Through a tight smile, she offered a terse. “Yes, Sir.”

Oh she would love serving up this order.

As she made the rounds in her section, she made a mental note of what drinks would need refills and who would probably be asking for their check soon. She stopped by the pick up station to grab the few appetizers that were ready and delivering them to the appropriate tables, including the breadsticks for the two women in the booth. After she’d finished, she went back to the bar and grabbed four pint glasses with the brewery’s logo on the sides. The bartender, a monkey Faunus she considered a good friend, raised a brow as he saw what she was reaching for, a short chuckle leaving his lips.

“Uh... do they know what they ordered?” His bow tie sat around his neck, the top two buttons on his white shirt popped open and, while he was hands down one of the best bartenders she’d ever seen, he was eventually going to get written up and perhaps even fired for continuously disregarding the dress code. He even had the sleeves rolled up to his elbows.

Usually, filling the alcoholic orders would be his domain, but she wanted to do this one herself. “Nope.”

“Did you try warning them?”

“Yep.” She popped the ‘p’ and threw him a grin. “They’re super convinced they know more about beer than I do.”

Sun shook his head, his tail flicking behind him. “Alright. I’ll let Glynda know.”

“Good idea. These guys are going to cause a scene when they choke on this stuff.” Yang set the four beers on a serving tray and set out to deliver them to the table. As she walked, she passed Emerald, who did a double take at what she carried. Red eyes went wide but the other server started to smile even wider as she noted which table she was taking them to, doing her best to hide her amusement behind the customer service mask they all wore. When she arrived at the table, she passed out the beers. “Four Rauchbeir.”

The moment she’d handed the drinks out, the guy who’d spoken up before waved a dismissive hand her way. “That’ll be all for now.”

Digging deep into her reserves of patience for the moment, Yang nodded and went around to her other tables, correctly predicting that the one booth in the corner wanted their check and producing it from the apron tied around her waist. By the time she got back to the booth with the two women, both of them seemed to be eagerly awaiting something- and her arrival didn’t seem to be it.

“Tell me, did they order the Rauchbeir? Or was that your suggestion?” The older woman had more than a little amusement tugging at the corners of her lips.

“I suggested a porter, but they insisted they wanted the ‘darker taste’ of a lager.” The looks she received proved the women were miles ahead in their understanding of beers than anyone occupying the table. “They weren’t satisfied with it and asked for something that would appeal to a ‘refined taste’, so I brought up the Rauchbeir.”

The women immediately started laughing, hiding their mirth behind their hands and throwing glances towards the table.

“We grew up near the Schlenkerla; we know exactly what’s coming,” the younger said, obviously reveling in the impending reaction. “You’re certainly not wrong- Rauchbeir appeals to ‘refined’ tastes.”

“Speaking of refined tastes- this time, without the sarcasm- what can I get you lovely ladies to eat?” Yang flashed a bright smile just as she heard the first choked gag off to her side, coming from the table.

The older one hummed, then waved a hand at the menu. An eight ounce sirloin, medium rare, with a side of the citrus grilled shrimp, a baked potato, and... hmmm, sauerkraut in a bowl. However you need to ring that up.”

“And I’ll take a grilled chicken salad, hold the egg.” The younger one paused, then continued. “And a tomato soup, now that I think on it.”

The blonde lightly bit her lip as she scratched out the orders on her pad. Okay, she could generally read people pretty well, but she didn’t expect either of them to have appetites like that. To be honest... she kinda liked that.

Then she remembered she was at work with a very problematic table and now was no time to get distracted. “Did you want any onions or mushrooms on your steak?”

“No, thank you.”

A choke, a cough, and a muttered obscenity.

“And what kind of dressing on your salad?”

“Balsamic vinaigrette, thank you.”

Someone sounding genuinely perplexed- of the four, one of them looked like the sort to actually enjoy that sort of beer, so she bet it was him looking at the others like they were overreacting.

“Excellent! I’ll go put those in right now.” Yang turned, heading to input the order, but found herself stopped by a hand grabbing her arm, and it took everything in her not to break it then and there. She only refrained by the barest margins.

“What the hell is this stuff?” He shoved the beer towards her, a little bit sloshing out and forcing the woman to quickly shuffle to the side to avoid the dark liquid staining her shirt.

“It’s Rauchbeir,” she said, her tone level, which was just about the best she could hope for all things considered. “You know, smoked beer?”

“S- smoked beer?” The brat’s expression screwed up. “How was I supposed to know that?”

“Because it’s a literal translation,” the younger woman from the booth said, her brows drawn together and a frown on her lips. “Rauchbeir means ‘smokedbeer’ and it’s brewed in the Schlenkerla Smokemalt. It’s an Atlesian legend and one of the best of its kind.”

“The thick, smoked ham taste is certainly a unique flavor, almost like thick cut bacon sprinkled with brown sugar, and it’s renowned the world over for its distinctive taste.” The older woman swirled her wine a moment before setting the glass down. “Just seeing it again has made me a little homesick, to be frank. It’s a very nice way to start a morning, or even an afternoon.”

“Indeed. Perhaps a pint a piece?”

“An excellent suggestion, Sister.” Blue eyes sought hers out, no request voiced but understood all the same.

“Of course, Ladies. I’ll be back with those in a moment,” Yang said, her gaze sliding from what was quickly becoming her favorite table to the man still holding her arm. “If you’ll excuse me, Sir.”

For a moment, it looked like he was about to give her a bit more of his mind, but the subtle flexing of her arm discouraged him. He was built himself- a few inches taller with broad shoulders and a moderate amount of muscle mass, but the blonde’s uniform concealed her own figure pretty well. A lot of people saw her chest and assumed that’s where the majority of her bulk came from, but now that he took the time to look, it occurred to the customer that his grip didn’t completely encompass her bicep, fingers and thumb nowhere near touching despite the large size of his hand.

He let her go with notable reluctance and she quickly left the dining area, ducking back into the kitchens to silently scream, glaring at the tile wall fiercely while reciting every reason she had for not marching out there and decking that dude in the face.

“Rent is due next week and Ruby has that job interview on Thursday. She lands that gig, we’re good. Just... just gotta get through this.”

“Yang.” Trying not to sigh in defeat, the blonde turned to see the manager standing behind her, a sharp gaze made all the more pointed by the glasses sitting low on her nose. “Do I need to take over that table?”

“No, Ma’am.” Forcing a smile, she spread her hands. “I’m fine. I can handle them.”

Glynda narrowed her gaze. “I’m going to stop by and speak with them regardless. I trust you, Yang, but I’m not about to have you start a fight in the dining room again; we’ve already been lenient in that regard.”

She wanted to snap out that decking someone for grabbing her ass as she walked by shouldn’t be held against her but even she could admit chucking the guy through a window after the initial punch pushed her reaction from ‘understandable’ to ‘over the line’. “I’m sure, Ma’am.”

“Alright.” She nodded, then looked around. “After that table leaves, take your break and calm down. They’ve already ordered their food, right?”

“No.” She crossed her arms over her chest and groaned. “They haven’t even picked up the menus. I think they’re just day drinking.”

With a long suffering sigh, the manager nodded. “Make sure you’re ringing up their beers. If they manage to finish one, I’ll cut them off after the second.”

Nodding, Yang took another minute to compose herself and then returned to work, inputting the sisters’ orders, grabbing her other tables’ food, and returning to the dining area to pass them out with a forced smile. She got a few comments, low muttered reprimands that a customer would make a scene with such a nice server, but she couldn’t be quite honest with her appreciation for their support. Still, she managed to return to the pickup station with an empty tray and swing by the bar to grab two more Rauchbeirs without incident. When she dropped them off with the Atlesian sisters, who set about taking a deep pull each without so much as a wince.

Once again, the server found herself impressed. She herself preferred lagers and ales- blondes, usually, with crisp and refreshing tastes, though she’d been known to enjoy a wheat beer on occasion. The thick, almost cloying taste of liquid bacon sliding down her throat certainly qualified as a ‘special occasion’ sort of thing, and it wasn’t bad but she definitely wouldn’t be able to take the deep pulls the sisters did. Obviously, though, the younger sister didn’t care for the beer as much, a flash of something appearing in her expression as she set the mug down.

“Ah, right. That is why I don’t drink this.”

“It’s not that bad.” Her elder chuckled, taking another long pull. “And all the sweeter for the occasion.”

Blue eyes darted towards the table and while the blonde couldn’t look without drawing attention, she suspected the boys were glowering at how easily the two women were enjoying the beer while they had only managed a few sips since ordering it.

“You do have a point.”

With a soft laugh, Yang shook her head. “I’ll be back with your orders shortly.”

She settled a few checks, brought back change, did another round of refills and appetizers, and then the women’s orders were ready. Loading them up, hardly minding the hot temperatures on the bowl of tomato soup and consciously ignoring the slight rumble in her stomach as her own hunger started to grow. Maybe taking a break after the problem children left would be a good idea.

Grabbing a stand and heading out, Yang carefully maneuvered her way through the dining area, leading with the stand as she approached the booth. However, a few steps from her destination, she felt the whoosh behind her a moment before the tray left her hand, the outside edge hit with enough force to sent the whole thing toppling towards her. For that most part, it just startled her, but the moment the tomato soup spilled from its bowl and hit her bare skin, she let out a pained cry, hand flying up to try and remove the hot liquid and sooth the injury as best she could. Thankfully, the high collar prevented it from hitting mostly flesh, but it seeped through her shirt easily, and the general chaos caused by plates, the tray, and the stand hitting the ground brought all eyes to her as she rounded on whoever caused the tray to fall. Unsurprisingly, she came face-to-face with the same man who’d grabbed her, a sick smile playing on his lips.

“You son of a-”

“Watch your tongue,” he said, the smugness in his tone enough to choke a bear. “Do you have any idea who you’re talking to?”

Logic and responsibility flew from her mind then, fury rising up in her and pulling her right fist back. In the next second, she would’ve knocked that holier-than-thou mentality clear from his head, along with a few other things, but someone grabbed her wrist and stopped her. A sharp rebuke lay on her tongue but it never left, someone else beating her to it.

“The better question, Mr. Winchester, is do you have any idea whose food you just ruined?”

Yang wasn’t surprised when she looked behind her and saw the older woman standing there, sharp features brought into even more definition thanks to the severe frown and furrow to her brows.

The Winchester guy scoffed, crossing his arms over his chest. “Please. Do you think you can intimidate me?”

“I’ll take that as a ‘no’ then.” Reaching into the best pocket of her suit, the woman produced a business card, offering it to the man while shifting her grip to the server’s bicep and gently pulling her back, out of punching distance. “Perhaps this will enlighten you.”

He snatched the card from her and glanced at it, then looked at it much harder, blinking several times. Then, he went pale. “Winter Schnee...”

Yang cringed. Sure, as a high end restaurant, they got their share of celebrities or those near enough the status, and anyone connected to the Schnee name automatically qualified as the former. They had some sort of genius relative in almost every field that existed and the family brand- the Schnee Development Company- made them easily known to just about every person in Remnant. Of course, she probably should’ve recognized the woman herself and her sister, considering Ruby was studying the corporation in preparation for that interview she had coming up, but she hadn’t exactly provided her older sister with any headshots of the current line of Schnees.

“Judging by your reaction, I’ll assume I’m known to you.” Winter scanned the three other men- all cowering in their seats- before focusing on the instigator. “Allow me to outline this in a very simple manner. You will pay off both of our tabs in full plus a fifty percent gratuity in cash and apologize to this young woman. Then you, and all your cronies, will leave this establishment quietly and not return until you’ve learned basic etiquette and, if you’re lucky, nothing more will come of this incident.” She paused. “And add twenty dollars to that amount; my sister and I were considering dessert. Is that amenable? Or would you prefer we handle this in court?”

“B-b-but I didn’t-”

“Oh, I’m aware you didn’t do anything to me, specifically, except delay the meal for my sister and I.” Her voice turned a bit harsher. “However, I will personally pay for her lawyers when she sues you for personal injury and loss of pay while she recovers. Which, you’ll probably not be able to defend yourself adequately after I call your father and personally inform him of the situation, and that recent liquidation of your trust fund might come in handy to cover you to some extent, but if Daddy Dearest tells your retained law firm to not handle the case as I have them represent her... things might truly not work out very well for you. Have I made myself clear?”

“Yes, Miss Schnee,” he replied, shoulders hunched as he ducked his head and looked away. “I’ll settle up the tabs now.”

“Good. I’m sure the manager will see to it that the amounts are accurate.” Winter made a motion with her unoccupied hand. “Now, shoo.”

As the man and his cohorts vacated the area at a quick walk bordering on a run, their metaphorical tails tucked between their legs, Yang took a deep breath and released it slowly. On the upside, she probably still had her job... but she really wished she could’ve punched him at least once. Still, she was grateful for the woman’s intervention and tried turning towards her.

Except, the hand on her bicep actually had a pretty good hold, the other woman looking at her in mild curiosity. Yang raised a brow, unsure what had brought the woman to a standstill but took a guess and flexed her bicep, unsurprised when the woman automatically squeezed and felt the firmness of her arm muscles.

Winter seemed to realize what she’d done the same moment the server smirked, releasing her and clearing her throat while producing a napkin. “My apologies for stepping in as I did but I truly detest when people are rude to their wait staff.”

“Hey, you probably just saved my job, so no worries, Miss Schnee,” she said, holding her hands up to try and ward off the woman’s attempt to clean her up. Honestly, the shirt was a loss at this point and she probably didn’t get burned by the soup, just suitably startled by the hot liquid. Plus, there were more than enough napkins in the back for her to clean the food off herself.

“Please, call me Winter.” The woman offered with a smile. “’Miss Schnee’ is only for those who need to beg my mercy.”

A flirtatious line popped into her head but, somehow, she managed to keep it there for once, instead laughing to cover the slight blush that was creeping into her cheeks. “Well, thanks, Winter. I guess I should’ve expected him to pull something like that, and I’ll get on restarting your order.”

“I’m sure someone else can do that-”

“I will see to it personally,” Glynda said, stepping in and putting a hand on Yang’s shoulder. “Go take a break, clean yourself up, and change your shirt. You’ve earned it, Yang.”

“Alright, boss.” She smiled and started towards the back, reaching up to slip out the knot out of her tie. She did have a spare shirt in the back, in a little break area. Along the way, she got sympathetic pats from Emerald and a few of the cooks, as well as a wide eyed look of fear from their newest server.

By the time she’d reached the break area, she’d already popped open the first two buttons and felt more than a little relieved she wore an undershirt today- nothing more than a thin tank top, but decent enough to get to the bathroom and tuck her shirt in properly- stripping off the ruined one and balling it up. The blonde truly doubted it could be saved, but she’d at least try, grimacing at the sticky combination of balsamic vinaigrette and tomato soup now soaked into the material. She quickly ducked over to wash her hands off before grabbing the clean shirt and heading towards the bathroom by the host stand.

She shouldered the door open and stopped short, surprised to find Winter washing her hands. It took a moment before she realized she was being a little silly- like, why was she surprised? Maybe nervous was the better word, since she was standing there in a tank top, but whatever- and Yang shook her head, stepping up to see herself in the mirror. The other woman turned and moved over slightly, to be courteous, but did a double take upon noticing who had just stepped up beside her.

For a moment, Yang fussed with her hair, setting the fresh shirt on the counter, but she was watching Winter’s reaction in the mirror. She seemed to be... staring. Maybe that was wishful thinking? After all, she’s just a server at a restaurant and Winter was... well, somehow connected to a business that probably spent her life earnings in a day on toilet paper.

But... it really looked like the woman was checking her out, or perhaps just very transfixed by the definition in her arms.

“I’m sorry that guy ruined your lunch,” she said, grabbing her shirt and beginning to pull it on.

“I’m not,” Winter replied, her voice calm and even, though a peek proved that she suspected her attention hadn’t gone unnoticed. “Weiss and I have been meaning to spend more time together. The extra time to bond is appreciated.”

With a chuckle, Yang started buttoning the shirt. “Well, if you ever come here again, you can ask for me to be your server. I’ll be sure to take my time.”

“I suspect you would.” She almost shivered at the way the woman’s voice sounded slightly deeper when she said that, biting her lip slightly. “I may take you up on that. Lunch here every Tuesday and Thursday would be a nice step in the right direction.”

“I look forward to seeing you here, Winter.” She tucked the shirt into her pants while the other woman dried her hands, just getting her buckle set before Winter turned. Yang quickly reached out and grabbed the door, opening it with a wide smile. “For you, M’lady.”

“You’re quite fortunate I find such cheekiness endearing.” The woman brushed past her, throwing a little smirk down at her. “Do enjoy the rest of your break, Yang. I was being serious about ordering dessert.”

After she’d walked away, the server allowed the door to close and passed a hand over her face, highly aware of the blush beginning to burn in her cheeks. Maybe it was just some friendly, amusing, flirty banter...

... or maybe it was entirely serious.

Either way, she had to go out there and take the woman’s ‘dessert’ order with a straight face.

“Heh, yeah, straight.” She rolled her eyes, throwing her tie around her neck and tying the knot. “That is a good one. Gotta use it some time.”

Somewhere in the back of her mind, though, she started playing through a few different approaches to asking the woman out. Just to pass the time.

It’s not like anything would come of it, anyway.

Weiss watched as her sister returned to the table, raising a brow and remaining silent. She knew the woman rather well and asking would just make her defensive, while remaining silent and curious would eventually lead to-

“It probably should’ve occurred to me that she’d go to the bathroom to change her shirt.” Winter sighed, putting her elbows on the table for a moment and putting her face in her hands. “Did you know that she has the physique of a weight lifter? I’m quite certain she could bench press me over her head with little to no issue. It suddenly occurs to me that I’d rather like to know the answer to that.”

“Sister, I do truly love to put it this way.” She leaned forward, offering a soft smile to her elder sibling. “It’s quite obvious I got the useless lesbian gene from you.”

Blue eyes peeked out at her, an ineffectual glare leveled her way. “That’s not how genetics work.”

“Am I wrong?”

The silence she received functioned as all the confirmation she needed.

#Elderburn #Elderburn Week #Day 3: Accident #TRR writes

239 notes · View notes

golddaggers · 7 years

Text

Switch

Reader x Kol Mikaelson

(NOT MY GIF)

*requested

Imagine: You had just been transformed into a vampire and commited your first kill, which induced you to turn off your emotions in order to help you cope. Yet, being so close to the Mikaelson family, they would not allow you to stay that way for long. However, despite how hard they try, the only one who manages to break down your walls is Kol Mikaelson.

Warnings: lights descriptions of torture, mostly fluff and swearing. no biggie.

Word Count: 2503

I fell onto the cold, hard ground, finally realising what I had done. Blood was spilt across my face and my body, proving it was not just some twisted dream fabricated by my mind to punish me for becoming a vampire; no, I had actually killed all those people. Their limp forms were scattered throughout the dark room, their necks broken due to my brutally. A growing pain took over me, leading to a strangled, loud gasp to crawl out of my lips. The guilt was too much for me to overcome it so easily.

“Y/N?” A deep, somehow soft too, male voice cut through the devastating silence. “What happened here?”

“I murdered them.” I managed to blurt out, tears already streaming down my warm, red cheeks. “I was angry, scared, hungry. I-I couldn’t control myself, Kol. I just couldn’t.”

“Oh baby.” He whispered in a soothing tone, one I did not deserve. “I hate to see you like that! It was a mistake. You’re new, it happens.”

“No, no, no. I ripped these people from their lives. I shouldn't… I can’t!”

“Y/N, listen to me!” My eyes were screwed shut, yet, the salty teardrops kept descending, reaching my bottom lip. “Don’t be so hard on yourself.”

“Turn it off.” Someone else said, coming from behind Kol. “You don’t have to suffer because of this. Just turn it off.”

“Are you insane, mate?” The tall, brown haired man yelled, obviously mad at the proposition. “She’s not going to do this!”

Damon smirked, tilting his head slightly, whilst graciously leaning against a covered with scarlet blood wall. Although it was a entirely crazy idea, my Salvatore friend had a point. Turning my emotions off could be really helpful, for it would rule out of the game all distractions. It would help me develop as a vampire. Plus, if I experience even one more ounce of this crushing pain I have inside now, I would surely break.

For one second I felt everything rushing through me, every bit of feeling, like pure energy was flowing inside my veins, and then it was over. I did not feel a thing. Not guilt, not sadness. Absolutely nothing. Solely void was left behind.

“Y/N, please tell me you didn't…”

A bright, wide smile curled my lips, revealing there was nothing that the mighty Mikaelson could do, except enjoy this new side of me.

“I did, honey bunch.” I winked at him, getting back on my own feet. “Now, if you excuse me, I have a few business to solve.”

“You’re not going anywhere.” Kol stated, grasping my wrist and forcing me to stay where I was. “And Damon, you better disappear before I have the chance to rip your heart out.”

Those words said, it took less than a split second for the plain white room to get suddenly crowded. Stefan and Elena went to Damon’s side, gently clutching his arms, assuring he would stay in place; yet, they did not come alone, for Rebekah, Klaus and Elijah rapidly approached their reckless sibling as well. I sighed, starting to get utterly bored from this whole situation.

Klaus cleared his throat, moving one step ahead and shooting a fierce look towards the Salvatores. He was obviously not happy to be seeing this horrific scene.

“Alright, who is going to explain what has happened here?”

“Why was Kol threatening Damon?” The brown haired doppelgänger quizzed, quirking an eyebrow. “I thought we had decided to call a truce. For Y/N’s sake.”

“He pushed Y/N into turning off her emotions.” The younger Mikaelson brother said, narrowing his eyes and still keeping me under his tight grip. However, even though this dialogue was annoying as hell, I could not care less about what was on the verge of happening. “Is it enough or you fellas need me to find another reason to be mad at the glorious Damon Salvatore?”

“You mean she…” Rebekah’s voice died out before she finished her sentence and her sibling replied with a weak nod. Man, those people were simply pathetic! “Let’s go home, then. We need to get Y/N back as soon as possible.”

Ultimately, I pushed Kol’s hand away from my upper arm and went to the centre of the room, staring each person standing in there. They had quickly formed a circle around me, perhaps thinking they could avoid my escape. Fools.

I chuckled, sustaining their strong glances at me and crossing my arms on my chest.

“Uh, if I may have a say on my own life, I don’t want to turn back on. I’m actually feeling pretty good the way I am.”

“I’m sorry, love, but you have no idea what you want right now.”

“Out of everyone, Klaus, I really thought you would appreciate this new version of me.” Licking my lips, I walked smoothly to where the Hybrid was whilst hearing everyone’s breathing hitch on their respective throats. “I was obviously wrong.”

“No, darling, you were wrong to get closer enough for me to this.”

Then Klaus, piecing his blue eyes on my own, got hold of my neck, his hands soft on the skin he grasped; sharing one last look, he swiftly twisted it, killing me where I stood. Yet, even though darkness engulfed me pretty quickly, I still formed one last thought: the blond Hybrid was totally right.

The room I woke up to was bright. And amazingly beautiful. Like it belong to a king. Or a queen. Its walls had a miscellaneous set of colours while the expensive furniture was perfectly positioned, like it had been made to that exact spot. The whole thing was simply perfect. However, whatever amazingness I should have been caught into, it was broken the second I realised I was chained up. Urgh, why couldn’t they just let me go? This is so boring!

“She’s awake.” Rebekah muttered, swinging the tall white doors open. “Hello, Y/N.”

“Oh, hello, munchkin.” An ironic smirk lied carelessly on my lips. “Such a nice day, isn’t it?”

“I definitely hate turned off Y/N.” She rolled her eyes, annoyed, yet, I could still see sadness playing on her gorgeous traits. “Come on. I want to try it first.”

“Poor Rebekah, always trying to save the ones she loves.” I said, staring at her emotionlessly. It was odd, though, for the memories of our friendship were still fresh in my mind. I was not able to care, though. “Don’t you get tired?”

The blonde soaked a small blade in a transparent, thin liquid, right before she dug it into me. I could sense the stinging pain, yet, it was not enough. I smiled faintly at her failed attempt to flip the switch back on.

“Try harder, Bekah!” It was teasing. Oldest trick in the world to get people mad. The ones who cared, anyway. “Come on! Fight for me.”

“God, you are such a spoilt brat!” The original snarled, burying the knife deep within my flesh. “Why don’t you obey, for once, the elders?”

“Enough, sister.” Klaus put his hand on her shoulder, stopping her to go any further. “Let me handle it. I might have a better chance.”

“Uh, I feel so especial! The mighty Hybrid caring for me.” A maniac smile changed my traits, giving it a crazy gleam, as he took his sister’s place, removing the blade afterwards. “Well, I should, shouldn’t I? I don’t. I feel nothing. Or does boredom count?”

“Look at me, Y/N.” I raised my chin, defying him by fixating my eyesight on his. “Now pay attention: you are loved. By everyone in this family. We would risk everything for you. Do anything. You’re a Mikaelson just as much as I am. Why don’t you try for us? Me, Rebekah, Elijah, Kol…”

“Really, Niklaus? That’s the trick you are using? Trying to make me feel like I belong?”

“You do belong, Y/N.” He stroke my cheek, his slim fingers tracing my cheekbones. “You are family. Come back to your family.”

“Nah, I don’t think that’ll break me.”

Klaus allowed a tired exhale to slip, shaking his head. I could bet he thought this was going to be easy: just appeal to her loyalty towards her family and she’ll be right back on track. Not exactly, Nik. I bit my bottom lip to avoid a sneer laugh. .

“Don’t make it so difficult, sweetheart.”

“I wouldn’t if you just let me go.”

“You see, darling, that’s not happening. You either flip back on or flip back on. There’s no other possibility.”

“Now what is it? Rage? Or is it pity? Doesn’t matter. It won’t do the trick, Niklaus.”

My last remark had done it for the Hybrid, because the anger within his irises announced what he was going to do next: snap my neck. For the second time. It must be my lucky day.

Simply marvellous!

“Are you awake now, love?” Someone questioned, tenderly massaging my arms, bringing me to a rather spinning reality. I blinked quickly, adjusting to the new found darkness. “Are you okay?”

“I am fine. Perfectly fine.” My voice sounded hoarse, probably due to the hours I spent “asleep”.”I imagined you would be their last resource. The reckless Mikaelson. My boyfriend, or is it ex? I don’t quite know.”

“Oh dear, it’s going to take a lot more than a humanity switch off for you to get rid of me.” He chuckled, bitterly. “I didn’t come here to convince you that this is wrong. I’m afraid you already are aware of it.”

“Then what?” I whispered, fighting against the tiredness. It was getting harder and harder to not feel anything. The emotions were scraping the walls of my head, crawling back to where they belonged. Nevertheless, I would not allow them to surface it. No. Never. “What do you want, mighty Mikaelson? Torture me some more? See if you, out of everyone, can make me flip back on?”

“Nah, I just want to talk to you.”

“Care to be more specific, sweetheart?”

“I want to tell you a story.” He clarified in a smooth tone, his lips dangerously close to mine. His mint scented breath fanning all over my face, making me want to kiss him, to taste that mouth. Urgh. “About a relationship I had in the past.”

“Oh, I see. You do want to bore to death.”

“Quit being a brat and listen!”

“Fine.” A soft sigh escaped as I nodded, agreeing. “Go on.”

“Before I met you, I was madly in love with this girl called Davina Claire. Damn, she was perfect! In every way.” Kol paused, swallowing thickly; perhaps he was struggling with the memories of his old ex girlfriend. “However, when she brought me back to life, it came with a price. I was cursed with an unbearable thirst. I tried to resist! It was worthless, for in the end, she died by my hand. And, God, it hurt like hell! I mean, I had lost the only thing that had ever made me feel something. I killed the only person that had ever touched my soul.”

“Is this supposed to be touching?”

“Oh come on, I’m not finished.”

“Proceed, then. At least it keeps me distracted from this knife buried in my skin.”

“I beg your pardon.” The brown haired Mikaelson smiled, gently, and pulled the blade off, winning a relieved gasp from me. Klaus must have put in back on to keep my blood flowing. “Now, as I was saying, I had lost everything. My magic. My Davina. Then I was bitten by Marcel and put into a slumber.”

“Didn’t you ever live? All your stories end with you in boxes.” The statement slipped and I widened my eyes, surprised. I did not care, why should I be asking stuff?

“I blame Nik for that, but you are right. My life kind of sucked and with Davina gone, it all became pointless again. That was when you, my tiny witty human, showed up.”

“I’m not tiny. Nor witty. Not even human.”

He laughed, clearly amused.

“Yes, you’re still tiny and witty. For me anyway. And I love you. So much.”

“Can’t do anything about it.” I shrugged clumsily, still restrained by the chains soaked in vervain. “This is ridiculous, don’t you see? All of you? I won’t get my feelings back.”

Kol, suddenly, cupped my cheeks, his eyes filled with everything mine lacked. It was hard to sustain the intimate exchange of looks, for tears began to well up on that chocolate sea. If I kept staring, I knew I was not going to be able to resist any longer.

“I don’t want to lose you too, Y/N. You’re the only good thing in my life right now and I can’t afford it. I won’t let you destroy yourself because of a reckless mistake. Because I wasn’t around to teach you.”

I chewed my bottom lip, finally caving in and feeling the energy of my emotions flooding back in. All of it. Pain, guilt, rage, love. Love! I had hurt so many people I loved! How dared I say so many hurtful things to them?

Salty teardrops fell down my cheeks with the realisation of the evil I had performed in the time I spent off. No one should forgive me for what I did or said. I was not worthy of it. A cry rumbled in my chest as I absorbed, bit by bit, the enormous acheness from my previous actions.

“Baby?”

“I’m so s-sorry, my love.” Those words came out mingled, stuttered, strangled. I closed my eyes, avoiding the silky, reassuring look I got from my boyfriend when I voiced a coward apology. What good have I done to have someone so sweet to look after me like him? “The pain… It took over me. Made me do things. I thought I was going to break!”

“Hush, sweetheart.” His warm digits silenced me, resting against my mouth delicately. “First let me get you out of these chains.”

“How can you trust me, Kol?”

“We’ve been together for a while now and I got to know your eyes, those sweet Y/E/C eyes, very well. I know when you’re lying.” He broke the iron that held me up, which lead to a clumsily stumble, for I was unable to stand on my feet properly. The brown eyed Mikaelson picked me up, carefully placing me on his toned arms as if I weighed nothing. “Thank you for coming back to me. I don’t what I’d do without you.”

“Oh, Kol.” A goofy sigh slipped. “I will always come back to you.”

“Always?”

“Always.”

Afterwards, a smirk still enlightening his traits, he stole a kiss from my lips. It was just a peck, yet, it made me feel warmer. Of course my guilt, self loathing, hate, the whole package, remained, nonetheless Kol managed to shake it all off, forcing me to concentrate on the present and, for now, that was all I needed.

853 notes · View notes

blademaster-banryu · 7 years

Text

FE Fates character analysis: Camilla's lost potential + defending what’s still good

So in light of the recent character rankings in the Fire Emblem Heroes poll, I’ve seen a lot of backlash in response to Tharja and Camilla being so high in the runnings. (This is why I made my post announcing my support/defense of them, incidentally.) And yes, it most likely IS for the fanservice factor-- however, that doesn’t necessarily mean that they are bad characters who are UNDESERVING of their popularity.

I seem to be firmly in the minority in thinking this, but Tharja is one of my favorite characters in Awakening and I will defend her and everything she stands for with my dying breath. I honestly think pretty much everything about her personality and writing is solid, and if you don’t like her, that’s totally fine! (If you’re gonna call her a bad character though you can just fite me, come at me scrublord I’m ripped).

Camilla, however, is honestly a little harder to defend-- but I’d still like to try. So in the interest of objectivity and fairness, I’d like to take a proper look at where she falls short as a character, and what’s still good about her.

Wanna start with her design first; overall, it’s pretty typical femme fatale attire, the outfit pretty obviously-pandering, but I think it’s got some good things going for it; she herself is very pretty, and most of the armor pieces are aesthetically interesting. The battle panties are the biggest offender of unnecessary sexualization here IMO, exposed thighs/booties are sort of a recurring issue with mounted females in the 3DS Fire Emblems and TBH it’s just bad character design, bad for immersion and bad the characters’ dignity. You could also make a case for her exposed cleavage and heels being too unrealistic as well for similar reasons of practicality, but they’re quite not as problematic IMO. Honestly I can see both arguments, and I know there are even some female FE fans who like Camilla’s design the way it is, and who appreciate that she’s a sexy character who’s also powerful, and a really cool/unique type of unit for the series as well. I think it’s fair to say that there are some good appeal factors to her even despite the fanservicey outfit.

Now there’s a fine line between being sexual and being sexualized, and while I think being sexual is perfectly fine as an aspect of her character, it’s clear that the decision was made to cross that line pretty hard with Camilla in Fates. Camilla’s appearances in cutscenes are rife with boob/butt shots, her behavior and much of her writing panders directly to male players... And to an extent, you know what? I get it. Sex sells. It’s a marketing tactic and it works. BUT... Having Camilla be the eye-catching sex icon does NOT have to come at the expense of her character-- Tharja is a successful example of this, I believe-- but unfortunately I think that’s exactly what happened with Cam.

I don’t have much to say on Camilla’s character and personality, since the Ghast Station’s video on Camilla did a great job of analyzing her and I don’t have much to add to that. At the end, Ghast concludes that his opinion is that he doesn’t like Camilla and that she’s a bad character-- and honestly, I can’t fault him for this opinion or the reasoning behind it. Most of Camilla’s writing has to do with doting over Corrin, and while this too is a keystone of her character, far too much time is given over to this and not nearly enough to fleshing out Camilla herself. So in light of that, I want to talk about what they COULD have done with her to make her more than she was and live up to her full potential.

So here’s what we DO get about Camilla: she’s protective, she’s bloodthirsty, she has attachment issues, and possibly the biggest bomb that informs her character/behavior the most: her involvement in the ‘concubine wars’ among Garon’s many lovers using their children to get a leg up on and even kill one another (there’s a great fan-made series of cutscenes about this that does a lot to make up for the insubstantial in-game writing). To me, Camilla has the potential to be one of the darkest and most tragic characters in the Fire Emblem series, but she’s never allowed to live up to that potential due to being sidelined as sex appeal and just an overall, largely inconsequential character (and it’s hard to see this as anything but sexist preference given over to the male characters, since Hinoka largely suffers from the same fate, minus the oversexualization).

So what would I want to see from Camilla? Honestly, I want to see her being MORE violent and bloodthirsty-- I want the threats she makes to actually mean something, to be backed up by her actions. (Again with the fanmade content, there’s a great AU for this being thought of by @exaltedgrimleal and @lightningbuglane ) She threatens to break Selena’s legs for trying to leave her, to lock up Laslow for torture if he betrays her, and of course to disembowel anyone who threatens Corrin... But never do we get any payoff for these threats during cutscenes. Why not have moments where someone tries to hurt Corrin, and she disregards his/her pleas to spare them, show us that Camilla is not to be trifled with? Maybe instead of Leo, SHE could have been the one to kill Zola after he proved problematic in Conquest, that’s well within her established character to do (but nooo can’t have THAT, a woman can’t be the one to take initiative in the plot that’d be compromising her status as fanservice icon, wouldn't it lol). Even her sexualization isn’t used to further her character; with how she dresses, wouldn’t you expect that she would use her looks to manipulate people who are otherwise inconsequential to her to get something that she wants, or even better, for the benefit of her family and her kingdom? (But nope that would be empowering her sexuality wouldn’t it lol. Women have to be passive, right Japan?) Camilla is a great unit on the gameplay side of things, and having her be so inconsequential in the plot furthers the already-distracting dichotomy between plot and gameplay in Fates.

Speaking of, her class is another area where a lot of character-building (as well as worldbuilding) potential is lost IMO. Malig Knights are supposed to be sorcerous wyvern riders with undead mounts, right? That's SO unique, it’s one of the coolest new classes to be introduced in ANY Fire Emblem game! In her class alone, there's the potential to explore 1) how a wyvern rider becomes a malig knight (do they have to resurrect a wyvern? KILL their own even? think of the psychological impact that ALONE could have and how it could further inform her both the loving and dark/controlling aspects of her character), 2) Camilla's relationship with her wyvern (doesn't even have to be touched on that much, maybe in 1-2 supports), 3) her mix of proficiencies between combat, magic, animal-handling, how she trained, etc.... She, as the sole playable character unit who starts as a Malig Knight, stood to add SO much to the world of Fates, on top of her own character, purely by virtue of her class. But her wyvern/class are literally NEVER acknowledged throughout the course of the game (a flaw that extends to all of the Nohr royals, actually), and instead the focus is put on her male-pandering aspects (or rather, lack of care to make her anything else). Characters’ classes informing their character and behavior is a frequently-used writing tool in the FE series that goes utterly unused and wasted a lot in Fates, but more so with Camilla than any other character, debatably.

So I think that about wraps it up here. Now make no mistake, despite all my complaints, I really like Camilla... but I can’t overlook her flaws-- writing flaws more so than character flaws (the latter is what makes characters interesting, after all)-- and will never hesitate to point out or criticize all the lost potential she had to be a truly grim and/or tragic character in Fates' plot (making her be depressed and pass rule to Leo in Birthright is about the bare minimum of what they could have done with that).

Still, I think the discourse we're even able to have over this proves that there WAS something more to Camilla than just the fanservice... Even if it wasn't much.

So if you dislike Camilla because of how little there is to her-- or even for what she was intended to be-- that’s fine. If she had been written successfully or the way I wanted, I expect she’d be an even MORE polarizing character than she is now, haha. (Just keep in mind that a character isn’t necessarily bad just because they’re sexualized, folks, I know that’s why a lot of people hate on her lol)

Thanks for reading and I hope I’ve given Camilla fans and haters alike some food for thought!

#Fire Emblem #Fire Emblem Fates #Camilla #FE #FE Fates #Fire Emblem Fates Conquest #FE Fates Conquest #Fates Conquest #camilla fe #fe camilla #Banryu's musings #character analysis #Malig Knight

354 notes · View notes

storyunrelated · 7 years

Text

Cold Hard Hugs #20_It Had To End This Way

Hey! I did manage to get it to end on twenty parts! How about that.

But yes. This is the end of Cold Hard Hugs. Or at least the first 'bit'. I have started a second 'bit' but it's not got very far yet and it's, uh, different. It is about different things. Kind of. I guess you'll see for yourself, sooner or later.

For now though, this is the end. See if it happens the way you thought it would

(The very end should be mentally accompanied by this track, because it was in my head)

I sat around a lot after they left. I sat in the lounge because I could and because that was where the films were. I watched the last one I’d watched with Tillie, but it wasn’t as good watching it on my own. I watched some others too but my jokes fell flat in an empty room. They fell flat with Tillie there, too, but at least they got some kind of reaction. The problem with telling jokes to myself is that I know the punchline. And I’m not funny.

The next day followed much the same pattern but in the daytime. There was probably something else I could have been doing, something more productive, but I couldn’t quite remember what. Films and drinking seemed just as good as anything else, at least until someone suggested something better.

While I’d been sitting around though, a disaster had crept up on me. I had run out of beer, which was bad. But I was capable of going out and getting more. Which was good.

I swapped out my oversized nighttime t-shirt for a far-too-small-probably-shrunk-in-the-wash one that was close to hand, dug around for my wallet, found my shoes and generally did all the things one does before leaving the house and then, well, left the house. The shop was not far away, at least by my standards. Some would have preferred to drive, no doubt, but those people don’t know the positives of a nice, casual stroll. I felt for them.

The walk was nothing to write home about. I have done many walks in my life at many times of the day and night and in many locations going to many other locations. Some have been more memorable than others for various reasons, most of which would make coherent sense only to myself. This walk to the shops was merely a logistical formality. If I could apparate I would have done. If i could apparate my life would be far easier, and I (probably) not quite as slim. And I was hardly slim as it is.

Thinking about teleportation of various kinds carried me in a numb haze to the shop s and before I was even aware of it was I there, confronted with beer. I honestly couldn’t even remember what route I’d taken, but there I was. The beer called out to me in myriad accents and tongues, all promises. That they were mostly brewed in places other than that which they claimed to hail from was immaterial for the purposes of my flight of fancy.

Maybe I was talking this up to myself. Making it more than I was. Best to focus on what mattered. I looked at the prices. Looking at my options, it really was the economical thing to buy a box. Anything less and - technically - I was spending more money. Technically. Bulk was always cheaper. So a box it was. Carrying it home would be fun. I could write it off as exercise.

I got ID’d, I paid, I left. Hoisting the box up on one arm I found the perfect position to seat it so the pointy corners didn’t press on my poor, tender flanks. Once that was done I trudged back the way I’d come.

Or at least the way I thought I’d come. I still wasn’t entirely sure which route I’d taken in the first place so I just picked whichever route seemed most likely to get me home soon. The one I picked turned out to be one I had not taken before, and I got a little lost. Unhelpful, but not uninteresting.

I then ran into Michelle. Walked into her would be more accurate, given our respective paces. I was not jogging. She had seen me coming a mile off and homed in me like a strolling, smiling missile. Conversation was inevitable, and if I was going to be honest it was just a tiny bit welcome.

“Fancy seeing you here,” I said, trying and failing to match her smile with my own. Simply out of my league.

“What happened to your face? It looks a little worse than usual,” she said, reaching out and poking my fading black eye. Nice of her.

“Hah. Uh, some guy hit me, it’s no big deal.”

“Why did he hit you?”

“Because he didn’t like me? It wasn’t something we really discussed. I think he mentioned Tillie. Maybe. Anyway, I didn’t know you lived around here,”I said, eager not to talk about being punched because it was pretty boring. My blatant and clumsy efforts at changing the subject were clearly amusing, judging by her reaction. She really did have the most enormous smile. Suited her, mind.

“I don’t, really. I’m just going for a walk,” She said with a shrug, raising her arms to indicate where she was, which was also where I was, too. Obviously.

“Ah, that’s cool,” I said. As I’d previously been thinking, walks were tops.

“Yeah. Going home tomorrow for reading week so I just thought I’d...have a walk first. Seems a bit silly now, I haven’t seen anything new,” she said, casting an eye around the neighbourhood. As far as streets went the one we’d met on wasn’t exactly the best. It wasn’t bad, just boring. If you didn’t know which town we were in - and I did, most of the time - and you’d just woken up on this street then you could have been ANYWHERE.

“No no, not silly, walking is good. Home for reading week, eh?” I did not know where Michelle lived or came from. I had no need to know. This is a bit of a theme with me, isn’t it? Skaffen was onto something! Ah...she hates me.

“You’re not?” Michelle asked, clearly inferring this from what I’d said. Magical of her.

“No. Figured I’d say here. I might actually try reading. Maybe.”

My actual, initial plan - as previously alluded to in my own head - had been to stay for reading week because Tillie had been staying for reading week. The prospect of us both being around with nothing much else to do other than be around and on our own had been an attractive one at the time. That hadn’t panned out, obviously, and I hadn’t really been able to muster the motivation to change my plan.

Not that I really had any appealing options available even if I’d had the inclination to change my plans. What did I have available? Nothing. Go home and be alone there. Hardly attractive. I’d be fine here. I might, in fact, actually do some reading, which would mean I didn’t just lie to MIchelle. That’d be a plus.

“Careful now, that’s dangerous talk,” Michelle said, which got a laugh out of me. Then she looked at the box I was carrying.

“You having a party or something?”

“What? Oh, this. No, I just ran out is all,” I said. She eyed the box rather more closely for a second and then gave half a shrug.

“Whatever makes you happy. Where’s Tillie anyway? I haven’t really seen either of you without the other for ages now. She back at the house?”

“She’s on holiday.”

“Oh. With family? Does she have family? Is that okay to ask?” Michelle asked, getting quieter as she went on, as though easily-offended people were lurking in the bushes to accuse her of being insensitive. I chuckled.

“I’m sure it’s okay to ask. I never have, but I’ve been told she has a father at least. Not on holiday with him anyway, on holiday with friends.”

“I didn’t know she had friends,” Michelle said. Then she realised what this sounded like “Not like that! I meant, like, I never saw her hanging around with anyone before she met you! I didn’t mean she has no friends!” She said. I grinned. I knew what she’d meant.

“It’s alright. They’re old friends, from when she was ickle,” I said. Michelle paused for a moment and had to take two quick steps to catch up again.

“She’s on holiday with other, uh, what-were-they-called-again?”

“Living machines. And yes. Woman. Man. Young man and young woman would be more accurate. Nice chaps. They came up together. I wonder what that was like…” I did wonder how the childhood of a living-machine would go. Was it even considered ‘childhood’? Was it analogous? Did they go outside and play? Maybe that was something I should ask about.

Could always ask Skaffen. Ha. Ha. Ha. She hates me.

“You’re...you’re okay with that?”

“Okay with what?”

“Her, like, going off with her friends and just leaving you behind.”

“Oh yeah. Why wouldn’t I be? People can do what they like. Actually, it was just Skaffen - that’s her, uh; the female friend - and Johnny going off at first but Skaffen came down, thought to invite Tillie, Tillie wanted to go yada yada. It snowballed, and here we are.”

“Are Skaffen - Skaffen, really? - and Johnny together or something then? Seems weird to bring along a third wheel.”

“Nah they’re just buddies pooling resources. Holidays are complicated and expensive things, you know!. But yeah. Apparently Tillie used to have something with Johnny years ago? But yeah. Kid crush or something like that. I didn’t really probe the details. Not that it matters. This is where we are.”

Michelle was looking at me oddly. I could see it from the corner of my eye but this told me nothing and I didn’t want to get a proper look because I didn’t want to get a proper look.

“I mean, it is a little odd that Skaffen would tell me they wouldn’t want me around as a third wheel - she actually said that, too, like you! - and then invite Tillie...but friends I guess. Nah, I can understand that. America’s too...American for me anyway. I’m fine.”

“Are you trying to convince me?” Michelle asked. Was I really so transparent?

“Is it working?”

“No.”

Rumbled. Oh no! Oh well.

“I am not surprised. Okay, I’ll admit there is a...selfish...rat-bastard part of me that is a tiny bit upset. Especially with some of the things Skaffen said. But that’s selfish and stupid and I don’t care what that part thinks. I’m fine,” the selfish rat-bastard part of my brain was a part I did not like. Always there, always gnawing away. I imagined other people didn’t have that problem. Or if they did they likely handled it better. I’m just not that good, really.

“You’ve really got to learn to stand up for yourself, you know? If you weren’t happy about it why didn’t you say anything?”

“Being unhappy - and unhappy is a strong word! I’d hardly go that far - about it wasn’t going to do anything useful - why ruin her holiday before it even started? That’d be a dick move.”

“Going off on holiday and leaving your boyfriend behind is a bit of a dick move…”

“Well it’s all subjective, in the end. Dicks and their moves are subjective.”

I disagreed with this, myself. Not about the dick moves part; they truly were subjective, as were a great many things. I meant about the going off. Rat-bastard feeling aside it was perfectly acceptable to go off and leave me, I thought. Why should she be forced to stay? Didn’t make sense to me. But that was me, and each to their own.

There was also the conspicuous point of Skaffen’s plan which I was not mentioning. Should I mention that? What would Michelle gain from that? Nothing, obviously. So don’t do it. She’d have some useful advice, no doubt; something you could take to heart and utilise, but how unhappy would it make her? I don’t know, but unhappier than she is already, and that would be no good. Keep it to yourself. Much better.

By this point we had both meandered so far we had actually ended up back at my house. This surprised me greatly. I stopped, and once she noticed I had so did Michelle.

“My place. You ever seen my house?” I asked. She squinted at me.

“No. Why would I?” Michelle asked. This was a very good point given I’d never invited her and without that she would have had no reason to ever even come this direction.

“Good question…” I said, adjusting my grip on the box in my arms. The conversation suffered a lull. A tree rustled and this just made the lull that much worse. A leaf fell on my head.

“I couldn’t get a glass of water, could I?” Michelle asked breaking the silence. She’d asked it in something of a rush, I noticed, though why I could not say. Perhaps she hated the quiet as much as I did. The question did rather blindside me though.

“From inside?”

“Well I could always drink from a hose if you got one,” she said. Good line. Technically not a ‘glass’ of water though. Not consistent. But I’ll let it slide.

“Funny, I like it. No, inside will work, come on,” I said, moving to the front door and getting it open. I let Michelle in first because that was the practical thing to do and also the polite one - one of the few times in life those things converge so neatly! I then closed the door. By the time this was done she had found the kitchen, though not the glasses.

“Nice place,” she said. “Not much cutlery, though.”

We did not have much cutlery. In fact, until I arrived, I don’t think there was any cutlery at all. No real need. So all that there was - which wasn’t much, as said - was mine, and therefore of substandard quality and questionable design. It didn’t bother me. Most of the time i was using it it was in my mouth anyway.

“Not been scouring drawers for glasses, have you?” I asked, setting my box down onto the side and feeling relieved. I opened it up as well. Warm beer was better than no beer. I’d put the rest in the fridge later. Maybe. Possibly. If I remembered it was there.

“No, just being nosy. Ah, here they are,” Michelle said on finding a glass. She proceeded to fill it with water, which wasn’t difficult for her. That’s a university education for you. That was why she - heading for a first last I heard, the way she was going - could fill up a glass but I was stuck using bottles. Says a lot. Propped up on kitchen counters we both stood and sipped, two young adults enjoying a beverage. How exciting.

“Whatever happened to those guys who hit you?” Michelle asked once her glass was empty. My bottle was empty too, so I opened another one.

“Just one guy hit me. The other ones were mostly just there to watch, I think. To observe, take tips perhaps. Tell me their exciting opinions. Either way I don’t know. Don’t really care. Unless I meet them again, in which case I may start caring again pretty quickly. Weird that someone would hit me in the face, don’t you think?”

“Some people have very strong feelings about living machines,” Michelle said the word with an awkwardness that was not deliberate. Fair play to her; it was not a term that rolled easily off the tongue.

“So I have noticed. I can’t really understand it myself, but then again I can’t really understand people in general, so I’m obviously not the best person to, uh, understand.”

Anything at all really. Just ask my lecturers. And teachers. And parents. And friends. People you pass in the street, ask them. They’d probably know as well. It is written all over my face, my lack of understanding prowess.

“Did you tell anyone about it? Police, campus security?”

“Nah, don’t want to make a fuss. It’ll be fine. If I see them again I’ll, uh...well I haven’t worked that part out. Maybe things will go differently. If not then maybe I’ll tell someone,” I said, staring down the neck of my bottle.

Was the glass in this bottle green or brown? I have great difficulty telling. When it comes to recycling them they have to be separated, I understand. Tillie does it for me normally. Though I haven’t had any she needed to separate for a while now. It’s not going to look good if she comes back and has to sort through a whole box worth.

I’ll find somewhere to dump them before that happens. Problem solved. Take that, Earth.

All of a sudden Michelle was in front of me. She must have moved quickly because I hadn’t really noticed her moving at all. Then again, everything was starting to go a little fuzzy around the edges anyway, so perhaps I wasn’t simply operating at full capacity. I didn’t even bother holding on when she took the bottle out of my hand and put it down onto the side.

“You shouldn’t really be drinking this early. Or alone,” she said, quietly, not looking me in the face. Her head was down, which given her height should mean she was looking in my face, but somehow she wasn’t. I imagine it’s a trick tall people perfect.

“Well I won’t have much choice soon, once you’ve gone,” I said with immense joviality. I didn’t pick up the bottle though. Not yet. Would be rude after she’d just gone to the trouble of putting it down for me. For whatever reason.

“You could always just not do it,” she suggested. I shrugged, not having the room for much else.

“I guess,” I said. She wasn’t wrong. It’s sort of hard to stop sometimes though. Once I woke up hungover I’d stop, so it was just a case of having that happen sooner rather than later. Probably not the best approach, but I’m not the best person.

Michelle seemed to notice how close she was and back up, which gave me just enough room to stretch as a yawned; good timing all round!

“Oh my God, more? What are those? Those from the same guy?” I heard her say. I paused mid-stretch and opened one eye.

“What are what?” I asked.

“Those,” she said, both her hands coming down onto my hip. That was unusual. I looked.

My t-shirt had obviously shrunk far more than I had initially thought, as my simple act of stretching had exposed a considerable portion of my hideous pale flank. I was suddenly struck by the potent memory of sitting by Michelle on that bench what felt like a lifetime ago, trying hard not to watch her stretch. I think she did a better job of doing it, myself. Stretching, not the not looking. She was rubbish at that as she was looking right at me.

So absorbed was I in this meandering train of thought that the actual thing she had been talking about - the bruises, far fresher than the one on my face and thus far more impressive looking (all green and blue! I think it’s green) - only occurred to me distantly after everything else. She had framed them with her fingers and they stood out quite blatantly. I grinned, a mite sheepish.

“Oh those. Don’t worry about those,” I said, dropping my arms and letting the shirt fall back into place. Barely. It was a damn shame, too; I liked that t-shirt. Then again, I could probably stand to lose some weight anyway. Michelle’s hands had left once fabric had fallen onto them, and now her arms were folded.

“But what did that? Those were even more bruises, right? How did they get there? What have you been doing? Did that guy who hit you do that?” Michelle asked, bombarding me with questions. Before I could even formulate an answer her eyes had narrowed ever so slightly and she’d added a further question:

“She did that, didn’t she?”

My immediate thought was of course ‘Who’s she, the cat’s mother?’ but I didn’t say that. I doubted Michelle would have got the joke. Did make me smile a bit as I replied though.

“She? Oh, Tillie. Uh yeah she does. Not that she means to. She just doesn’t really know her strength and she has, ah, hard bits…” I said. Now that they’d been mentioned they did throb a bit. It was something I’d honestly stopped noticing that much and just sort of lived with. It wasn’t so bad, really. Pain don’t hurt.

From the look on Michelle’s face I could sort of tell she wasn’t taking this as lightly as I was, but that was to be expected. She did not have the same level of familiarity I had, nor the context. To someone on the outside the bruises probably did look pretty bad. ‘My girlfriend is made of metal and hugs me super hard’ is a flimsy excuse, albeit a true one.

I suppose in most other circumstances it would look very questionable indeed, being so beaten up. Though ‘beaten up’ has connotations all its own, none of which apply. I wasn’t hit, I was merely squeezed and occasional buffeted. Tillie was merely a little rougher with me then she perhaps was aware she should be. I imagine were she going out with - for the sake of painful, self-pitying argument - Johnny this would be less of an issue. But I’d prefer not to think about that.

Michelle’s arms had dropped from being folded and she was now absent-mindedly rubbing one arm, looking around the room and not at me.

“Can I ask you some...deeply personal questions?” She asked.

“How personal?” I asked. She gave me a very level, completely serious look.

“Deeply personal,” she said, looking me straight in the eye. I had to turn away before I had a hole seared out the back of my head from the intensity of her stare. Such eyes!

“Sure, why not,” I said, taking another swig and pointedly not meeting those deadly, deadly eyes. Such eyes...

“Do you and Tillie ever get intimate?”

I felt like saying that if we did I’d probably have worse bruises and in more interesting places, but this was a serious discussion and Michelle had asked a serious question, so I needed to come up with a serious answer. No coyly asking ‘define intimate’ or anything like that. That’s no fun, but that’s life.

“We cuddle and I give her a kiss from time to time but not what you’re probably driving at, no.”

“You kiss her?” Michelle asked, evidently having some difficulty with the concept. I brought a finger up to tap my forehead.

“On the noggin, yeah. From time to time. There’s not many other places it’s practical. At least not that I know about.”

“I see.”

“Hey, you asked.”

“I did, I did.”

“What sort of answer were you expecting? Something more lewd?”

“No. I don’t know. Sorry. It was dumb to ask,” she said. I felt I may have been coming across as somewhat more aggressive than I meant to. A habit of mine. I actually have zero idea of how I come across to anyone any of the time, but apparently it’s the wrong way almost all of the time. I would try harder to fit into the idea of what they expected. Would be easier for them.

“It’s alright. Not something everyone runs into everyday, can see why you’d be curious. But I’m very boring, I’m afraid. I’m just very fond of her,” I said. Michelle’s expression was still obviously less than fully positive.

“Not a fan?” I asked.

“No. I mean, not like that. It’s just...this is going to sound really bad…” she said, nudging at something on the floor with her foot. Whatever it was did not move, and she stopped nudging it. A wise decision.

“Honesty is the best policy. I’m hardly going to hold anything you say against you,” I said. A true thing. I’m too lazy to hold anything against anyone in real life. Takes too much effort by half. She gave me what was a very potent apologetic look.

“It’s just that I don’t get how you can find her, you know...attractive?”

“That’s a complicated question. Wait, no. That’s a complicated answer. To that simple question. Uh...I’m really not the best person to explain it,” I said. Michelle pinched the bridge of her nose. I still don’t know what that’s about.

“You’ve really got to stop doing yourself down like that, it’s exhausting. Just treat it like a yes or no question and, you know, give me a yes or a no.”

“It’s not as simple as that though,” I said, doing my best not to grit my teeth as I said it.

“Treat it like it is. Snap decision, go.”

“It’s not - ugh - if it’s no I sound like a bastard and if it’s yes it’s robbed of context.”

“Well give me one then give me context,” Michelle said, and even I could tell she was getting sick of this back and forth as well. She forced my hand.

“Yes then. Yes. And no it’s not because I’ve got a thing for serpent tails or lenses or metal or whatever it’s just because I love her and when I look at her I feel...something. Like a good thing. I don’t know, I’m bad at this. I just look at Tillie and see Tillie and I feel good and I don’t know if I can break it down any more than that.”

Michelle did not respond immediately.

“You love her?”

“Do I? I said that?” I asked, she nodded. “Oh. Uh.”

I couldn’t add much to that. I felt a bit numb. Had I said that? Had I meant that? Did things like that really just slip out? Oh dear. First person I say it to not being the actual person who it concerns. Go me. You’re great at this.

Michelle went quiet, looking around the room, fingers tapping on her empty glass.

“So...you’re going to be here on your own?” She asked and I clung to her change of subject like a drowning man clinging to a piece of floating wreckage. Not the first time that bit of imagery had come to me this year. Must be a rough year.

“For the week, yeah,” I said.

“You going to be okay?”

“Course. Why wouldn’t I be?” I asked. Michelle was looking at me but I could not for the life of me work out if it was just because that’s people did when they talked to one another, or if she meant something by it. Not the sort of thing you could just ask, either.

“Some people might get lonely,” she said with a shrug, finally looking away, not pinning me down with those damn eyes of hers. So big.

“Oh, I’ll be lonely. But I’ll be fine. It’s only a week,” I said. It was only a week, it really wasn’t that big of a deal. She kept tapping on the glass. Some rhythm I couldn’t quite pick out. She noticed I was noticing and so put the glass down in the sink, hands going back onto the counter behind her as she lent against it.

“If you wanted to, you know, come up and see me sometime you could do that. If you wanted. It’s only two or three stops away,” she said, faux-casual.

“That’s very nice of you, but I wouldn’t want to intrude.”

“You wouldn’t be intruding. Just friends seeing each other, right? Normal human interaction. Everyone’s doing it these days,” she said. I chuckled, and not for the first time.

“So I hear. But no, it’s fine, really it is. I’m sure you’ll have other things going on anyway and I wouldn’t want to, uh, cramp your style. Or mess it up for you. Third wheel, that’s me. My stock in trade. It’s fine,” I said, wafting a hand in her direction.

For a moment it looked like she was going to press the issue but midway through starting to she clearly decided against it as she sunk back onto the counter with a shrug.

“Alright. But if you change your mind you have my number. You do have my number, right?”

“I don’t think so…”

“Well let’s fix that,” she said. We did, exchanging numbers. I’m not sure why I did that. Impolite to refuse at that point, and always handy to have people’s numbers anyway. In case of emergency, you know.

“Or if you want to talk or anything. Anytime at all, okay?” Michelle asked, by way of command. I nodded.

“Rightyo,” I said, tucking my phone away. Tillie had not sent me anything. She’d said she’d try, which is not the same as saying she would. So that was fine. Probably too far away now anyway. Probably busy. That was fine.

The conversation lulled again. Michelle stood up straight.

“I should probably...go. Packing to finish,” she said.

“Of course, of course. Don’t let me keep you. I’ll be seeing you again soon no doubt anyway,” I said, guiding her through the hall and opening the front door for her. It’s a host thing, I’ve been told.

“As soon as you like,” she said, pointing to my pocket. I patted it.

“Yes yes, have no fear. You have fun doing whatever it is you do back home. Having fun, probably.”

“I make a point of it,” she said. She then paused, deliberated, and hugged me.

It was forceful - as I was used to at this point - but it wasn’t as uncomfortable. Her edges did not dig into me. I wasn’t even sure she had edges. She was likely too soft to have hard edges, and too warm. Very warm, in fact. Warm and soft and holding me very tightly indeed. I wasn’t sure where to put my hands and still hadn’t made a decision by the time Michelle broke away and stood back.

“You be okay, okay?” She asked. An odd ask.

“I’ll be fine,” I assured her. She gave me a lingering look, said nothing and then headed down the path. We waved, I closed the door and then she was gone. I moved back to the kitchen, dragging my feet along the carpet and ending up leaning on the counter again.

Picking up the bottle Michelle had put down I looked around the kitchen and noticed just how dark everything had got. The light switch was only a few feet away but that put it out of reach and I couldn’t really find it in myself to move closer. I took a swig in the dark and grimaced.

I’ll be fine. It’s only a week after all, and in the grand scheme of things what’s happened, really? Nothing horrendous. Nothing of any note at all, if you think about it. So my girlfriend was out of the country - she was allowed holidays with friends. So what if one of the friends she was going with was the intelligent, successful, nice guy she had had a crush on when she was a kid? He couldn’t help that, and neither could she. It didn’t mean anything.

And what kind of perfect-storm of nonsense was that situation anyway? That sort of thing wasn’t supposed to happen in real life. It felt contrived. But these were the cards I’d been dealt. It still didn’t mean anything. Nothing at all.

Of course, the rat-bastard lurking in the dank hindquarters of my brain was quick to disagree, but it always did that. The rat-bastard was quite energetic and enthused as it painted a picture of Johnny and Tillie sharing experiences bringing them closer together. Once-in-a-lifetime things, the whimsical occasions being on holiday creates. What sort of shenanigans might they get up to on the other side of the world, all alone? Well, all alone barring Skaffen, who would probably be more than happy to give them all the space they needed. The rat-bastard was under no illusions as to who Skaffen would prefer Tillie with, even if I was.

But the rat-bastard is a liar, so I ignored him. The more convincing he sounded, the more I ignored him.

And so what if a pretty, friendly person had given me their contact details with explicit instructions to call if I felt the need? I wasn’t going to impose on anyone like that. Certainly I wouldn’t dream of actually going and seeing Michelle, no matter how close she was or how easy it would be. Better I just let her get on with whatever it was she was planning on doing. I’d only mess things up for her. Who would want me around? Someone who said they did? Unlikely.

The rat-bastard part was very quick to point out that - were I to visit Michelle, who was after all only two or three stop away - the possibility of further soft, warm contact was probably quite high. It might, the rat-bastard said, be quite abundant in fact. And given the likelihood of Tillie and Johnny getting close and extra-chummy across the pond (as the rat-bastard had previously mentioned) it would surely be understandable to seek some manner of comfort for the wounded feelings, even pre-emptively. It made it sound reasonable.

This idea was abhorrent. It made me unhappy. The misery I’d be inflicting on Tillie if she was just having a nice, friendly holiday. To come back and find out - as one always finds out - what I’d done when her back was turned, and why. A betrayal based on an assumption. Pathetic. Not to mention the misery I’d be heaping onto Michelle, dragging her into a sucking mire entirely for my own short-term benefit. Disgusting. Unthinkable. Pointless. Down rat-bastard, down. Back in your hole.

No. I would stay here. In the dark. Where I couldn’t hurt anyone.

“I’ll be fine,” I said. I mostly believed it. But not completely.

And that was that.

END

#Cold Hard Hugs #Story #Writing #Amwriting #Writblr

4 notes · View notes

lalka-laski · 4 years

Text

Let’s start off with some basics. What’s your name? Elizabeth

How old are you? Way too old to be filling out Tumblr surveys but alas.

What’s your hair and eye color? Blonde hair, blue/green/gray eyed.

How tall are you? 5′7″ What’s your relationship status? In a beautiful, happy and HEALTHY relationship with my soulmate. Alright, enough of that. Let’s move on to the random shit.

What’s your favorite song? I could never choose just one but for the sake of the next few questions, let’s go with “Thursday’s Child” by David Bowie. What does that song mean? What is the message behind it? Simply put, it’s about being loved and accepted by someone who sees the light in you. It’s about coming to terms with your flaws and past mistakes to let yourself feel love. Is it your favorite because you relate to it, or do you just like the beat? It’s always been one of my favorites, even before I was in a positive relationship. I’ve always just loved its haunting but strangely hopeful sound. And I guess in many ways I’ve always felt like a “Thursday’s Child” myself. Have any pets? If so, what are they and what’s their names? Not presently Have you ever met your idol? I haven’t met any of them and I think in most cases I’d prefer not to What’s your favorite method of gaming? (PC, Xbox, Playstation, etc) I’m not into them If you’re in college, what’s your major and why did you pick it? I have a degree in English/Creative Writing and I don’t think I really need to bother explaining why, right? I like reading and writing. Pretty straightforward. How’re you doing today? Not bad! I’m really fatigued despite sleeping for about 13 hours last night, but otherwise I’m fine. Just having an ordinary but boring workday (hence the survey). What color are your bedroom walls? White Describe your favorite shirt. Lately it’s an off the shoulder cropped sweater that I’ve been wearing EVERYWHERE What’s your view on smart watches? Cool or a waste of money? Ehh... they’re not for me. I’m not that into gadgets and such, so I’d have no use for one. But I don’t judge others for wearing them/wanting them. What is one poster that you have hanging on your bedroom wall of? I actually have no wall decor in my bedroom right now! And I’ve been living in this apartment for over 6 months, so I can’t use the “just moved in” excuse anymore. I have some really beautiful artwork to hang up, I just haven’t gotten around to it. How many times have you moved in your life? Twice as a child, then twice for college (two separate colleges) and then once as an “adult” If you moved, do you like where you are now better than where you were? I absolutely ADORE my apartment right now. It’s cozy and homey but still has all the amenities of modern digs. It’s in a prime location that grants me all the benefits of city living (walking distance from my job, stores and bars, and a short car ride from anywhere else I frequent) but also all the advantages of suburbia (quiet, safe neighborhood). I really lucked out and I plan to live here for the next few years.

What’s your favorite color and why? Soft pink, because I aspire to be Elle Woods and/or a Disney Princess. Do you have a calendar? If so, what’s the theme? Nope. I tend to always buy them just because I love the look but then I never end up using them.

Have any famous person’s autographs? WELL I went to a Mat Kearney show and meet and greet at a local record shop and got his autograph & a photo. In all my excitement afterwards, I set the autograph down somewhere and lost it. (Typical me) I still have the photos though and that’s really all I care about. Do you draw well? I was actually decent at drawing as a kid/tween and I really enjoyed it. I’m sure I could’ve taken my interest further, but I was intimidated by the art scene at my high school. It was pretty cutthroat and the levels of talent were unreal, and I was just too afraid to even try. What type of cell phone do you have? Iphone 7 Should you be doing anything else right now or are you just bored? I’m at work right now and to be honest, there’s hardly any actual work I need to do. So here I am... Are you a cat or a dog person? Why? I’m a cat person by default because of my extreme aversion to dogs. I don’t like their energy and hyperactivity! Cats are calm and cuddly which is much more my speed. Tell me about the plot of your favorite book. I could never choose a single favorite, but I’ll describe the plot of the last great book I read: a former film star and sex symbol relays her life story in vivid, salacious detail, to a “nobody” journalist. Do you wear glasses or contacts? Reading glasses, on which I’m growing more and more dependent... What do you think about horror movies? I liked them in my youth. But as I grow older and more anxious (and more worn down by life’s shittiness) I can’t handle them as much. If you love them (I do), what’s your favorite? I like the classics like Halloween. Lots of suspense with little gore. Got any cool Christmas presents picked out for family or friends yet? I’m going on a family vacation a couple weeks before Christmas so we’ve all decided our money is best spent on that trip. We’ve agreed to do no gifts this year. Glenn and I are still going to exchange, however, since it’ll be our first Christmas morning together and I mean, we gotta open SOMETHING! Do you do Black Friday shopping or wait for Cyber Monday? Neither appeals to me Have any mental illnesses? Wow, what a question! What’s your favorite word and why? In all seriousness, I hate this question because I can never think of a clever answer. I like lots of words!! Don’t put me on the spot like this!! What is the most expensive thing you own, and what is it? My Smart TV maybe? Did you buy that item yourself? No, it was a graduation gift. Where do you work and what is your position? I work at a fertility clinic and I do administrative work and some marketing. How often do you cuss? A lot more often than I realize What type of car do you drive, if any? I don’t Do you have a lot of social media accounts? Which ones? Tumblr obviously, Facebook, Twitter and Snapchat. And I have an Instagram but it’s a “finsta” so it’s not associated with my actual identity. What is your favorite genre of music? Most of what I like falls into rock/alternative/new wave categories Does your family have holiday traditions? If so, what are they? We do, although they seem to have gotten all out of sorts these past few years. But the advantage of that is now we can create new ones! If you’re in a relationship, are you happy with it? It’s bliss <3 How long have you been with your significant other? A little over a year officially, although we were “talking” for about a year prior. I know, so millenial. Do you like psychology? Oh for sure, the human mind is fascinating. What is something your state is popularly known for? Everything associated with New York City, although that’s hours away from me. Other than that hmm... Wegmans? Do you like to do craft projects? If so, what’s the coolest thing you made? I do! I actually need to bring my art desk and craft supplies over to my apartment so I can craft more. I love scrapbooking, paper quilling, painting little trinkets and knick knacks... all kinds of projects! Do you watch sports or do you think they’re overrated? They don’t interest me much at all. What’s one occupation you think gets paid too much and doesn’t deserve to? Well while we’re on the topic of sports, professional athletes are disgustingly overpaid. Do you straighten your hair? My hair is naturally pin straight but sometimes I’ll run a straightener through it depending on what style I’m going for. Ever dyed your hair a color that isn’t natural? (blue, pink, etc) Never How’s your relationship with your parents? This is tough. My parents are good people and they certainly worked hard to provide for us financially and materially. And they did spend a lot of quality time with us. My dad was a lovable goofball and my mom was a nurturing, quintessential mama hen. That said, they weren’t perfect and a lot of their shortcomings have created long-term issues for me. I struggled with my mental health a lot as a pre-teen and teen, battled disordered eating and developed a drinking problem (among other things). My parents solution for all of this was to essentially place me on lock-down and send me to a therapist while offering no actual support of their own. They rarely, if ever, checked in to see how I was progressing or to help me get to the root of the problems. I missed out on a LOT of natural milestones that I should’ve experienced because of my perpetual lock-down, and I never combated my binge-drinking; I just learned how to better hide it. So I resent them for this and I often wonder where I’d be in life if I got the support I needed, when I needed it. So while I still love them and we do have a solid relationship (we talk daily), I’ll always feel a little sour about that. Do you still live with them or do you have your own house? I live on my own, which has been a great relief and in many ways, has made our relationship stronger. What’s something you are currently saving money for to buy? I’m just trying to live... lol Do you smoke/vape? If so, what brand do you smoke/what device do you use? I don’t do either. I own a CBD vape pen but I don’t really use it. Ever done drugs? No hard drugs Tell me one of your worst habits. Binge eating and drinking, excessive worrying, obsessing... What’s a weird quirk you have that no one else you know do? I love reading the profiles on writeaprisoner.com, then googling the inmates’ names to find out the crime(s) they committed. If you game, what type of headset do you use? What type of computer do you own, and do you like it? An Acer chromebook. I like it because it has a touchscreen and movable keyboard so I can use it as a tablet or laptop. What’s the thing that annoys you the most? Bigotry of all kinds. What brand of TV do you have? Samsung Are you excited for Christmas? I’m excited to spend my first Christmas Eve/Christmas morning with Glenn and start creating new traditions Tell me about your favorite vacation you’ve taken. All my favorite moments are at my family’s cottage in Canada.

Tell me something cool about yourself. There’s not much about myself that I’d consider “cool...” Haha Did/do you get good grades in school/college? I had exceptional grades and test scores in elementary school and was considered “gifted.” These alleged gifts kind of dwindled in middle school as I let myself get too distracted by personal/emotional/social problems. I got decent grades in high school (all As in subjects I enjoyed, Bs in the subjects I struggled with), but excelled in college and graduated Summa Cum Laude. So that’s my roundabout way of saying yes I did, just not always.

What’s your ringtone on your phone? It is 2019 my dude... What’s your favorite store to shop in? For clothes I like Express, Buckle or most department stores. Although I’ve been doing more online shopping than anything lately. If you won the lottery, what is the first thing you would buy and why? I’d pay off all my debts and then I’d book a trip around the world. How long have you had a Bzoink account? What on God’s green earth is that...?

Ever been to Field of Screams? If so, what’s your favorite attraction? Again, what is that? Do you own a Polaroid camera? Nope Do you have hardwood floor in your room or carpet? Carpet

It’s a Saturday night, what are you typically doing? Either out with friends or snuggled at home reading/watching a movie/drinking some wine. Do you have a lot of friends or do you not have any at all? I have a lot, but only a select few that I hang out with regularly. What’s your all time favorite movie and why? Legally Blonde, because I love the message and of course, the aesthetic.

How many blankets do you sleep with at night? One or two What’s the last TV show you watched? Did you enjoy it? I’m currently watching this ridiculous gift-wrapping competition and I’m laughing my head off at the absurdity of it all. (PS- for anyone reading this survey all the way through, I’m no longer at work. Yes, I’m taking this survey in two parts because I enjoy these questions so much! Do you prefer cable TV or do you use Netflix? Netflix & Hulu What is your dream job and why? A writer/contributor to a magazine or website. I’d love the ability to write about topics that interest me for a living. Do you think you would be a good therapist? No. I think I’m very empathetic, I’m a good listener and I give good advice (for the most part). But I’m a Type 4 which means I’m often too wrapped up in my own head. I wouldn’t have the emotional energy to be a therapist.

What’s your favorite brand of clothing? Didn’t I already answer this? Did you like this survey? One of the best I’ve taken! Hence why I saved this draft to finish it hours after I started haha

#survey

0 notes

furiousconnoisseurcomputer-blog · 6 years

Text

Car Insurance..6 Points..(read on)?

"Car Insurance..6 Points..(read on)?

I got 6 points back in 2009 for speeding with a drink drive ban the same night! I don't need any lectures. I can easily say biggest mistake of my life! I done my time and still paying for it. I done a insurance quote without the 6 points and it was 600, with them it is 1300! (the drink drive ban included in both quotes) It is comming up to the 4 year mark where I can now get them removed from my licence, but I have to still declare it to my insurance even though there not on my licence any more..? (rehabilation offenders act..?) I have changed my ways and I drive very sensibly in low litre cars! Never want a fast car! (I am 23) I just use it for work my annual mileage is around 10k. These 6 points have raised it dramatically! Are there any insurance companies out there where I can only declare it for the 3 or 4 years? Or do I have to even declare it atall insurance companies are asking for 5 years, but they are completely off my licence after 4..I would of thought under the rehabilitation act I served my 4 year sentence now a 3rd party company (the insurer) is asking for 5..? Help on this will be greatly appreciated. Thanks

BEST ANSWER: Try this site where you can compare quotes: : http://freeautoinsurance.xyz/index.html?src=tumblr

RELATED QUESTIONS:

Can I call an auto adjuster for a quote and then not use them?

Car value (Kelley Blue Book) about $4200-4500 (just bought it a couple of months ago for $5K). Older car, low low mileage. Seriously excellent condition, fancy wheels, no similar cars close to the low mileage anywhere near $5K within a 200 mile radius. Body work $5K est from body shop. Do I bother calling insurance company to send an adjuster out, or should I just fix it myself and save the insurance cost hit because they will total it anyway? If an adjuster gives an estimate am I then bound by their decision, which seems as if it will be to total the car? If they look at it will they raise my insurance even if I fix it myself? I am not sure what to do!""

Does PA or NJ have cheaper car insurance?

I'm wanting to know which state has cheaper car insurance. I have usaa. Does it vary state to state ?

Where can i find cheap Auto Insurance Providers in Missouri ?

HELP!! IM 19 i need a very cheap car insurance?

hi i recieved a BMW compact 02 plate car as a gift, and i was really happy but now im really upset because i cannot find any cheap car insurance, i quote all the time and the lowest price i get is 5200 for a year and monthly instalments of 468, i wonder where in their brain do they they think i can pay that every month, i work and pay my rent, sky, internet, gas, tax, credit card etc. what must i do i cant afford to pay 468 more on bills. can you please give me websites which can help, and please dont leave any rude comments because i really cant be bothered for u wasting your time , THANK YOU""

Cheap car insurance for 18 year olds?

What type of cars have low insurance costs for young drivers and also which insurance providers have the best deals for new drivers? Thanks in advance!

Can I buy a used car without insurance?

I'm only 18 and I got accepted for a car loan. It's about $200 a month but I can afford the car insurance rate now. I'm buying the car from a dealership. Can I buy the car then drive it home and let it sit till I get insurance? Or can they deliver the car? If I drive it home rate away wouldn't it be like a test drive for the used car?

Should I change car insurance?

So here how it goes. I want to get a new insurance for my Mom's car. She is 52 years old women who drives a Honda civic 2002 Sendan that was totaled and repair before. She is paying 1,600 a year and I think that's a lot for liability . She used to have a car before that was in an accident(my brother hit somebody else car) and we had to drop that insurance(progressive). Two years after my brother broke another car that my mother bought but this time the insurance company(state farm) did not find out. Right now we are back to progressive and a car hit me while driving and I did call the insurance. It was not my fault and I don't think anything changed because we are still paying 1,600 but I still think its a lot. It is the best I can explain the situation , so should I go out and try to find a better deal? Any advice is appreciated""

How much would full coverage car insurance cost?

for a 2003 chevy impala 64,xxx thousand miles i am 21 with no accidents or tickets!!!""

How is health insurance handled for medical students? I can't go without it!?

What auto insurance companies are currently appointing in Florida?

I have been a licensed 2-20 Insurance Agent for a year now. Im currently looking for auto insurance companies that are appointing in Florida. Any names and phone numbers of these companies would be a big help. Here are lists of companies that Im currently writing business with: Bristol West Progressive Gainsco Seminoles I need some more companies so that I am not only limited to these four. By the way I am in the SW Florida area. Thanks SO much for your help guys

Should I get earthquake insurance?

I live in California. The quote I got was $150K dwelling, $5K personal property. The deductible is $22,500 and the annual premium is $370. Is this worth it?""

When health insurance says it has?

weight benefits... what is that? Is it only stomach stapling or is it a weight loss doctor or what??? Do you know andone who has used these benefits? Or do you work with health insurance?

Why car insurance quote from tesco is 550 whereas competitors quote over 1000 ?

i went through swinton, axa ,norwich union, high performance, churchil, and a couple others. they did not even come close...is this possible? i am a bit suspicious, if that tesco quote is reliable, but they say when i call that i can complete the whole process online and i do enter the same detail as on other websites.""

Cheap car insurance!!!?

I'm 17 and I just got my license and my dad is looking for insurance for me does anyone know where I can get a very good deal??

Is my auto insurance valid after curfew?

If my 16 year old gets in an acident after 11 pm, curfew, is my auto insurance policy still in effect?""

""My car insurance was voided in the past, and now I can't get a quote anywhere, can anyone help?!?""

When I started learning to drive at 17, I decided to buy my self a cheap car so that I'd be able to get more experience behind the wheel, pass my test quicker and have a car as soon as I passed my test. I was insured on my provisional license with an insurance company which specialised in learner drivers. However, I ended up getting 3 points on my license the week before I passed my test, in what I still think were pretty unfair circumstances. My house doesn't have a drive or a garage and so I had to park my car on the road in front of my house, or on a street round the corner when there were no spaces. As it was my first car I was really excited, and without understanding that I could get in trouble for it, I used to sometimes sit in my car and listen to music with my friends. The week before I passed my test we were sat chatting when a police car came down the road and pulled up behind us. Someone had broken into some allotments nearby and they were questioning us as to if we had seen anything. They searched my car- for tools that could suggest we had done it I presume, and when they found nothing they ran my license and obviously realised I only had a provisional license. I still at this point didn't realise I had done anything wrong, I wasn't driving the car, simply sat in it so I didn't realise I had committed an offence. The police informed me that because the engine was running, I could have been driving or about to drive and on that basis they convicted me for driving without a license. I only got 3 points and a 60 fine due to the fact I wasn't actually driving and at the time I accepted that with relief, I was terrified I'd get a ban or lose my license or get a massively unaffordable fine. I could have appealed but that would have meant going to court and I was only 17 and that terrified me. I declared the points to my insurance company straght away, but due to the nature of the offence my insurance was invalidated and void. I've only just now realised how serious having insurance voided in the past is. I'm supposed to be moving a 5 hours away in a few months for a job, and I have plenty of money saved for car insurance and a car, as without a car, the move is completely unrealistic. Without a car I won't be able to get to work as the hours are unsocial and my job isn't very well connected with public transport at all and so relying on public transport or taxis is simply not an option. I found a car, went to get an insurance quote, and found out that getting insurance is practically impossible when you've had insurance voided in the past. The points don't seem to be a problem, when I tell companies about my points but not about my insurance voided in the past they happily give me a quote. They're expensive, but affordable and it's what I was expecting. However, as soon as I tell them that my insurance was voided in the past they refuse to even give me a quote. I'm completely out of options and I don't know what to do. I need a car, but I can't get insurance as much as I try. I know I was in the wrong, but it seems like the voided insurance is more of a punishment than the points are and surely that isn't right? And the voided insurance will stay with me for the rest of my life, so does that mean that driving will never be an option for me? I'm sorry for the essay, I just really don't know what to do! If anyone's been in a similar situation with voided insurance or know of a company that would insure me then please let me know! Just anything that would help, let me know! Thank you so much in advance and sorry again for the babbling!""

How much is approx. insurance costs for a 125cc road bike with 23 years L driver. Can any one plz ans me?

How much do car rental agencies typically charge for insurance?

How soon does actors get their health insurance?

How soon does production company offer health insurance for their workers? And, what other insurance does the production company offer their workers; and, how soon?""

Can't pay my insurance?

I paid my tickets and was going to renew my license but was told I was suspended from paying insurance till next year, is there really anything I can do?""

Motorcycle or Scooter Insurance in London?

How much would the insurance be for a motorcycle or scooter worth less than 4,000GBP in London? I'm hoping that it would be a lot less than a 50cc scooter in Dublin worth about 400GBP costing 200GBP for insurance per year.""

I'm going to look at a used car today. When should I buy Insurance?

I've seen pictures and know a lot about it's history. They have asssured me they have reciepts for all the work done to it. I'm pretty certain i'll be buying the car as I am taking money. Do i ring my insurance to get an idea of price and then ask them to start the insurance immediately when I buy the car? Or do they have a delay to when i'll actually be insured/ to when the police can tell if a car is insured or not? So should i change my insurance now or later? Thanks

I NEED A CHEAP AUTO INSURANCE ONTARIO?

I have my g2, i am 19 years old, and i am trying to find a cheap insurance to quote me on a cheap car....its only a 99 cavalier 4 door. I have done a lot of online quotes and i have basically gotten the same quote around $430. I would like a quote more around the $200 range!! Help! Anyone know of any cheap auto insurances?? Thanks!! Carley.xo""

How often Can You make a Windscreen Insurance Claim for one Vehicle in One year (UK car insurance)?

Ive just had a replacement Windscreen fitted as an insurance claim with the Norwich union. Three days later after the local Council Resurfaced a local road the Windscreen got hit by a stone thrown up by a car be driven way to fast for the newly surfaced road...the Question is How many such Windscreen Claims is you Car Insurance Company likely to Honour in any given year of fully Comprehensive Insurance. I feel a bit of a pratt Making a claim only 3 days after the first claim, but Neither of these Incidents were my fault but just accidental damage. as it is the first Claim cost me a 60 Excess payment and the next one will cost 60 just thec same...""

""What are the monthly/weekly costs of running a car? (insurance, registration, petrol)?""

im looking at buying a car, im 17 i have had my licence for about 3 months and i want to know how much i should be expecting to pay for insurance, registration, petrol etc, for a 4 cylinder proberly auto and ranging from 1990 to 2000 year. thanks :)""

Car Insurance..6 Points..(read on)?

What is the difference between home insurance and buildings and contents insurance?

hi. I will soon be moving into my first house with my girlfriend and its all new to me. We have been told we need a few insurances. Is there a difference between home insurance and building and contents insurance? or are they both the same thing? will they cover leaks, fire, structural damage, theft, boiler etc The house is in Newcastle UK. I would appreciate any help thank you

I haven't received my national insurance?

I'm 16, going to turn 17 this year. I am from Bolivia (south america) I have live in the UK for 7 years and I don't received any benefits ... I haven't received my national insurance and i don't know why if any one knows why or how i can get? then please tell me thank you""

I'm getting sued from an old car accident? will my insurance pay?

two years ago i was involved in an accident with another vehicle. we filed a police report and we each reported the accident to our insurance companies. i filed a claim with my company, but the insurance companies had us each pay our own damages. we both walked away from the accident. two years later, i receive a certified letter that i'm being sued for $10,000 (within my liability limits) for medical damages and other losses. i need to appear in court or have a lawyer. it's been two years, will my insurance company still cover this after such a long time? and, do i have to find my own lawyer, or will the insurance company help me? (they're a very good company) i just found out and i contacted them, but they can't get back to me til monday while they find the old adjuster's files.""

Is it cheaper on insurance to make payments on a car or buy it straight out?

Insurance on a used car verses a new car?

My dad says that if I buy a new car my insurance will double or even more than my insurance on my used car. Is that true?

How much is car insurance for a range rover sport 2010?

I have a friend how is looking to get a 2st hand range rover sport 2010 but Is worried about the insurance. What is the range of car insurance prices for the basic driver

Was Obama's health care/college system comparison valid?

Tonight President Obama compared the public health care option to the public system of Universities and colleges. He said the public option will work the same way public colleges and Universities without inhibiting a vibrant system of private colleges and Universities. This is a fool's argument and a total apples to oranges comparison. Let me explain, first almost all private universities receive funding from the federal government. The federal government is not going to provide funding for private insurance. The second reason is it's common knowledge that the best Universities in the U.S. are private schools such as Duke, Stanford, and the Ivy League. These universities fill most of the highest paying jobs in the country. Some jobs even go as far as to require a degree from one of these schools (Stock Brokers on NYC Stock Exchange.) These highly paid graduates can donate larger amounts of money back to their respective colleges than the average Joe who graduated from a generic state funded university. No one is going to donate money to the private insurance companies. We can't even get all the people who qualify for insurance to sign up and that's the problem! Look, I have no way of knowing whether the public option will work or won't but when faulty logic is used to support it I become concerned. When most of the people supporting the public option are from California (a state where the middle class is few and far between) I become more concerned. When most of the Senators and Representatives who support the public option say they would prefer the U.S. had a single payer system (that's total government control of health care if you didn't know) I become very concerned. The reality is no one knows what the effects of public option will be. Also, the success of FedEx is not any proof that public option won't hurt private companies because an independent council regulates the mail industry. No independent council is mentioned in any of the plans in the House or Senate. yes or no""

""How much would car insurance be if i'm 18 years old, own an audi A5?""

I live in Ontario, i never been in an accident and do not have a criminal record. i am just looking for an estimate number of how much it would cost.""

""What would be cheaper, insurance wise (car title)?""

Have the car title in my own name and have my own insurance, or have the car title in one of my parents name and be under their policy as a driver to the car?""

Whats a low insurance rate for 18 year old for a 1991 honda civic?

I shopped around for low insurance and the lowest i got was about $300 per month for 1991 4 door honda civic. is there any other lower insurance for this car ? its kind of old but i heard that hondas are heavy on insurance. if it is, what car is low on insurance for a first timer car and insurance. im 18 years old, i got my g2 in april, i took driving school, and i never had auto insurance. can someone help me out""

""I need to find how much insurance would cost for a dodge charger, tune-up, tires etc including coupons?""

What site should i go to , to figure out this stuff?""

What happens to rest of my insurance after a write off?

I had a accident today in my fiesta, hit some ice, lost control round a bend ended up in the ditch, car looks f****d admiral picking it up 2mo I am only 11 months into the policy I have been told by a few people that it is defo a write off so I take it i will be paid out for the car (how long would this take) I am also getting a courtesy car by the garage picking the car up to repair it now will i have this till i get paid out? and due to having 11 months on my insurance and i paid in full can i freeze the insurance till i get a new car (ill be getting the same car infact i hope its not a write off) or will i get something back on the insurance due to only using 1 of the 12 months i paid for?""

Is there good deals at Insurance Auction Auto Sales?

Im interested in going to insurance auto sale for wrecked and salvage vehicles. My question is are the prices low enough to fix the cars to profit money on! What are the popular cars to buy, fix and resale...I was thinking like civics and mustangs because u see them everywhere you go. Im just wanting to try and new route to make some money, I have experience in body work, welding and painting and can usually find good deals on parts...really i just wanna know how cheap the cars sell for....Note I just bought a Lexus rx 300 from a person who bought it from a insurance auction I paid 1900 for it! Anything Helps, Thanks""

What is the best online source for shopping for health insurance?

My son is 20, full time college student in a different state (PA.) Home state is Ohio. I am on disability so my insurance (and my husbands') is through Medicare.. I am shopping for an individual plan for my son, and there are so many sites which offer so many choices...Not only do I need to get the insurance plan, I need to find the best web site for the query. (tried einsurance, etc..)""

Finding cheap classic car insurance?

I have a 1979 chevy malibu and i want to be able to have it and my winter car on the road. I want to find like a cheap classic car insurance for it so i can pay for both insurances. a friend of mine was telling me you can get it really cheap ccause its a clasic. Anyone know of any?

What insurance plan is most affordable and supports therapy?

Hi, I've been seeking good therapy since I was 17, I'm just wondering, what insurance plan is the most affordable as well as obviously covers therapy? Thank you""

Is there a way I can lower my car insurance rate with Progressive?

I'm 21 years old, and have been driving for about 3 years now, and I am wondering if there's a way for Progressive to lower my insurance rate. How do I about doing this with them? What do I say? Thank you!""

Broad estimate how much do people think motorcycle insurance would be for a 16 year old?

I live in California

""Ex has name on log book for car but i own it, it was put in their name for cheaper insurance, but now i want ?

The car back can I just take it

Obama waives auto insurance?

Is there affordable health insurance for pregnant teen girls?

i need any kind of reliable resources. please help.

Cheap car insurance...who are you with?

i am looking for cheap car insurance for my two cars. i had my license since i was 18 and now im 20. i have no tickets and i need to find insurance please help me....who do u have and how much do u pay?

How To Create An Insurance Plan?

This family of four consists of a mom, dad, a twelve-year-old girl, and a sixteen-year-old boy. The family is about to move into a new house. They also own two cars. Help the Martin family create an insurance plan. An insurance plan simply lists the types of insurance they have or will be purchasing. The plan may also include some details about the insurance. For example, it may list life insurance worth $500,000 or health insurance with ABC Agency. For your assignment, create an insurance plan for the Martins. Create an insurance plan. As you create the plan, think about all of the risks this family faces and how they can protect themselves from financial loss. Next to each type of insurance that you list in the plan, write one to two sentences about why you think they need this insurance. I'm not sure how to create an insurance plan, can someone give me some guidance? Thank you.""

Car insurance for a 17 year old?

what is the cheapest car insurance company for a 17 year old. (people with recent experience would be very help full) also what car would be cheapest to insure. (would an old car e.g 1980s early 90s be cheaper than a newer car) i am looking at third party insurance and not comprehensive

I'm 20 with no diploma: How do I get health insurance?

I'm a 20 year old male in Austin, Texas, and I was homeschooled and have 2 courses to complete until I get my highschool diploma. I have very little work experience (worked for HEB for 3 months). How do I get health insurance? Any suggestions on who would hire me that has insurance, or any government help I could be eligible for health wise?""

Car Insurance..6 Points..(read on)?

Insurance Claim Question?

So i got hit by someone the other day and i have a question before i put a claim on it. I saw the truck that hit me but i didn't get the lincence plate number. I saw the guy pulling out after he backed into me and he didn't stop. I saw him pullin away from my car, so i know he hit me. The bumper is screwed so i had it rivited by my friend cuz it wouldn't stay up. So my question is where i did not get the guys plates and i have the basic (i think liabilty) insurnce, can i call and put a claim on it and get money from my insurance company, without my rate going up and having to pay more a month for my insurance.. Thanks..""

Motorcycle insurance in ontario?

How much would Motorcycle insurance be for 16 year old male liveing in Ontario? I was thinking of getting an older ninja between the years of 1987 - 96. Just wondering how much it would be around . I tried an insurance quote online, but it didnt really turn out right. Thanks""

Is moped insurance cheaper than car insurance?

i need an easier way to get around town but until i can afford a car i was thinking if i learned to ride a scooter instead it might make things more simple but are they cheaper to run than cars

What is the difference in Medicaid/Medicare and state insurance?

Maternity Insurance...Anyone have it?

My husband and I are trying for another baby. And most insurance companies in TN say you have to wait 9 months for the insurance to take effect. So is there any insurance out there that will help without having a time limit and not Tenncare or WIC. We will not qualify for that due to our income.

Is this how liability car insurance works in general and when you grant someone permission to drive your car?

This coverage pays for damage you (or someone driving the car with your permission) may cause to someone else's property. Usually, this means damage to someone else?s car. I called my car insurance and asked them and they said that insurance follows the car rather than a person. So no matter who would be driving it, it would basically be their responsibility. Now, would this also include letting your kid or a family member drive your car? even if they're not in the actual policy? It seems like when that is the case, things get somewhat confusing. I'd love to hear any input from anyone who ever has or currently does work in the car insurance world.""

Will lawmakers eventually create a national health insurance exchange instead of the state based exchanges?

Also, is it possible still for health insurance companies to be given the freedom to sell their policies across state lines?""

""My car was towed, I still owe payments, No insurance...Now what?

Okay...so first things first.... My car was towed without insurance. I do still make monthly payments. I was in a wreck 2days ago :/ and my car finally died today (Radiator gave out) ...show more

Sued by insurance company?

i'm 25 and get health insurance through my work. But just recently, they've upped the fee for it: from $4/paycheck to $8/paycheck (that's weekly, not biweekly). I'm technically still able to use my dad's insurance till i'm 26 and i figure, if i can save $8 a week, then why bother using it through my work at all? But my supervisor is trying to tell me that if my dad's insurance company finds out that i'm eligible to get insurance through my work and don't use it, then they could sue me. Is this true? It shouldn't be up to them which insurance i use. I shouldn't have to pay for something i can get free somewhere else.""

What is the average of insurance cost for a 19 year old?

I've been looking around online to research costs and from what I've seen it averages around $150. $200 at the worst. But my mom tells me I have to pay $440 dollars? Like wtf. Even four of my friends, who are still 18, pay around $170 or so. Is she just bullshitting me? I have never incited any tickets and drove safely when I was 18 and still now at 19. I'm not sure what to say to my mom. I told her about how others are paying wayyyyyyy less. I'm thinking the insurance is just cheating my mom or something. Anyone have any idea what I should do? I remember my mom asking me to give her my transcript to show I have a GPA above 3.0 to lower costs. And now she tells oh it's $440 .. I don't know what's going on. I'm not very well spoken in my native language so there's some issues talking about this.""

CAR INSURANCE for a17 year old??

i just passed my test and have the old ford fiesta waiting for me to drive but atm the quotes i'm getting for insurance is around 2000 What are the cheapest sites for car insurance? Should i do Pass Plus?

How much will insurance cost after 2 duis?

I am 24 years old and live in Michigan and I received my 2nd offense DUI in April of last year. I've been sober ever since and have AA signatures to prove it to the board for license evaluation. If I get it back I will automatically have a Breathalyzer in the car for a minimum of when year. It won't start if it blows alcohol. You know how they work. lol. I was wondering if anyone knows approx. how much I will pay for insurance. Thank you in advance for answers.

What is the cheapest way to get insurance with a friends car?

I'm already practising my driving lessons and theory. Once I pass what's the best and cheap way to be insured.

17 cheap car insurance??

i live in the u.k im searching for car insurance for when i get my car does anyone no any car insurance companys that do cheap car insurance for my age or comparing sites. iv already tried compare the market and confussed.com links would be amazing thanks guys X

The course of insurance and risk management deals with what?

Works as who?

How much is it to get painting and remodeling permit and insurance in seattle WA?

I don't no where to pay my insurance or how to pay it?

telling me how do i pay my insurance and where do i pay it

""If I report an auto insurance claim under my comprehensive, does it count against me?

Not sure whether to report an damage to my vehicle. I estimate the cost to be about $ 500.00 +. My deductable is $ 500.00. Any info will help :)

Can my insurance drop me?

Hi, i took a urine test with my doctor the other day. I asked what h was testing for and he said everything , so Im not sure what hes testing. He said he was gonna check for diabetes and what not. I was wondering, in the case he drug tests me can he tel my insurance? Can I get dropped from the insurance for this? I smoked weed about 5 weeks ago. I live in California amd hnet is my insurance. Thanks!""

Is there a really cheap insurance for people on a fixed income?

my dad is legally blind and my mother is the only driver, they cannot afford to pay 150-200$ a month for insurance.""

How hard is it to start your own insurance company?

how much capital do you need or are there companysthat will front the money

About how much would my USAA auto insurance cost?

I am 16 and I will be getting my license... I passed drivers ed and get good grades I wanted to get a quote but the USAA website wanted me to give info such as social security and etc, and I do not feel comfortable giving that info. Can anyone tell me a rough estimate of what my auto insurance might cost per month?""

Convertible car higher insurance?

lets say there is a 350z Coupe and a 350z Convertible, is the 350z Convertible insurance cost more than the 350z Coupe?""

How to convince parents to let me have auto insurance?

I've had my license for a little over three months now. However, I have no insurance, and therefore cannot drive (in California). Their reasoning is that I am an unsafe driver which I disagree with because I quite easily passed my driving test at the DMV and always think before I do anything when I drive. However, they seem firm on their decision... It's a bit frustrating having my license for so long but still being unable to drive. I'm tired of having to always ask friends for a ride or my parents; I just want a taste of independence. Of course, I'm not trying to be too arrogant or stubborn, I've respected my parent's decision, it's just bugging me a bit now haha. I offered to do a six-month plan instead of a year plan since I'm heading off to college in Septemberish. I'm about to turn 18 in a couple weeks also. Does anyone have any advice?""

Am I paying too much for my health insurance?

I'm 23 year old and non smoker, I got my health insurance from my company's employee benefit, and I'm pay $29 a week for this coverage: $20 office visit $115 ER They pay 80% I pay 20% Deductible $470 Out of Pocket Max $3500 Am I paying too much? How much would I be paying if I get this benefit by my own and not from my company?""

Car Insurance..6 Points..(read on)?

How much will insurance go up? ?

How much will insurance go up if you are 18 and just got into an accident with a park car and only hurt there bumper?

How often does Geico lower their insurance rates after you have been with them?

i have been with Geico for almost a year and right at the 6 months my insurance went down from $90 a month to $77 a month... I think they do what some other companies do and lower every 6 months for not getting involved in an accident but i want to know for sure. if someone has the information for me that would be great... thank you:)

""So what would you suggest for my 1st car? has 2 b 5 door,cheap 2 run yet reliable & cheap on insurance??""

So what would you suggest for my 1st car? has 2 b 5 door,cheap 2 run yet reliable & cheap on insurance??""

Where can i get cheap car insurance? (young drivers)?

Im 17 and need cheap car insurance, any companies anyone would recommend? Thanks! :)""

Classic Car As A Daily Driver In Michigan?

I'm a hot rod & kustom guy, have building and restoring old cars for awhile now..love the looks of em and the feeling I get driving them, I'm opening up my own shop soon too. I drive a 2001 Grand Am GT and it's about to die 190,000 miles needs tires, brakes, bearings, engines making noises but for the price I paid and miles I put on it, it worked well. Now I need a new daily drive to school 72 miles round trip 2-3 times a week. I live in Michigan, was wondering what it would be like to drive an classic car as a daily...say a 1958 Chevy Bel Air with a 283 motor...the insurance is cheaper, easier to fix and find parts..but may be more in gas...just wondering if anyone drives a classic everyday and how is it in the winter...I'd have to figure out heat some how. I have many cars 1968 Caddy Deville on air bags, 1930 Model A Coupe hot rod, 1951 Mercury custom, 1956 Cadillac Deville...etc""

Cheapest car under 1000 to insure?

I'm 17, male and want the cheapest insurance possible.""

How much is State Farm Car Insurance per month?

Is Nissan 240sx expensive to insure?

Is 89-93 240sx (S13) expensive to insure? I am 16. I would put this car under my mom's insurance. She never had an accident, ticket, etc. Also I never took drugs or any stuff like that, never been pulled over or something if it matters insuring a car.""

Is a 93' mustang hatchback cheap on insurance cause its a hatchback?

hello I'm 17 and i'm looking to get a car. I have always loved the 93 mustang.Its my favorite car ever.It is a hatchback so would that make it cheaper on insurance?? my parents always helped my brothers by putting there name on the tittle along with my brothers.I'm pretty sure it made it cheaper.There are only 2 cars that i really want either the mustang or a older honda civic hatchback.i like the way both the cars look.please help. leave you comments/opinions Thanks!

What are the Cheapest Veichles to insure in Ontario? or in general?

What are the cheapest to insure? or the cheapest to fix?

""If I am added as an added driver to a car, how much will the insurance be? Please see details:?""

If my parents were to get a mini 2004 for example, and they both have no claims and no license points, (so their insurance is about 350 each) how much would it cost to add me (a new driver aged 17) to their car. If one of parents was to be insured, and I was added as a named driver I mean. Roughly speaking. And yes, it would be a new car that my parents hadn't driven before. I am the UK by the way, so I am talking about not $. Thank you for all contributions!""

Average teen car insurance?

I have a '98 pontiac grand am thats in nice condition. can someone just give me a rough estimate, or what their insurance is or was as a teen""

How much would insurance cost for a subaru impreza?

I was wondering how much insurance would cost on a 2004-2006 subaru impress 2.5 RS. Not the wrx sti just the RS with the 2.5l 4 cyl. Without a turbo. How much would it cost for a new driver (between 16 and 18 years old) for full coverage on one of these cars. I would like number answers if possible. Thanks.

How much does car insurance cost.?

I am 18 and ready to get my drivers license but how much does car insurance cost per month on average.?

Total lost car INSURANCE?

I own a 1997 dodge intrepid std 4 dr sedan 6cyl gasoline 3.3 liter 4 speed in fair conditions cd player no rust with 197,242 miles. My car was was in a hail and tornado damage where the hood has a dent and the driver and passanger side have dent and the trunk. I have full coverage insurance and they telling me that my car was total last i love my car and i spent alot of money fixing it and it drives great no problem. So I was trying to get some help from some one that could tell me how much is my car worth so they wont give me less money and if they offer me less what could I do. I am not trying to bew greedy but i do love my car and spent alot of money on it. I would rather get it fix . PLEASEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE HELP ME""

What factors affect car insurance premiums?

My mom is going to give me her old car once she gets a new one, and she said insurance is about $100/mo. My friend asked what insurance would be and I told her, and she thought that was really low The car is a 1999 saturn SL1 and it's standard, is the insurance cheap for this car? My mom has a great driving record I'm now wondering what affects car insurance premiums? I know age, gender, driving records, and other stuff.. but what else?""

Where's the best and the cheapest insurance for a moped?

How do I find the cheapest car insurance?

My rates always go up even tho my wife and myself have clean driving records, we drive a 2012 Chevy Traverse and an old 1998 Dodge Ram, how can I find more affordable insurance rates? Thanks!""

Pittsburgh car (auto) insurance?

Where can I get auto insurance in Pittsburgh? What do you recommend? I bought a car recently and I'd like to find a cheap way to insure it.

Car Insurance?

anybody know what the Uk cheapest car insurance for somebody with 15 years no claims discount car engine size 2.8cc?

Seriously...How do you really understand your car insurance coverage?

It's certain things that the company doesn't make very known about how much is paid if an accident occurs. Can someone help me? I recently purchased a policy with Geico. 500 deductible on comp and colli. Still owe 14,500 on car and it's only worth 10,000 per blue book. My goodness. This world is not fair. Father save us. So many people out to get over on consumers.""

Would zero demerit points mean that my insurance rates wont be effected?

In terms of my driving record, etc?""

""Someone hit my car, do I have to report to my insurance company risking the rate increase?""

Few months ago somebody hit my rental car in their rental car during vacation. Other party's fault, he admitted, police report confirms this is his fault. Both me and the other party were insured. The other party seems to be reasonable. Now I have a repair bill, few thousands. I am reluctant to report this to my insurance company, since I heard over and over again that even though it's not my fault my rate can and probably will still go up (read here if you don't believe http://www.carinsurancecomparison.com/does-your-auto-insurance-go-up-if-someone-hits-your-car). I think this is ridiculous, but that's the way how things are. So is it possible, and is it a good idea that I contact the other party insurance myself without involving my insurance since my case is a clear cut case? Are there any pitfalls that I should be aware of?""

Why insurance companies charge more simply on your car color?

I bought a 1991 Ford Mustang and the color of it is Red. My best friend has the same car, we both have same company, same age, same ticket-free record. And on our insurance bill we got showing the coverage, my payments were $28.50 more than his. I called them and they said it was because of the color of my car. His is blue. Why is this?""

Is home insurance quote negotiable?

Just got a new quote on home owner insurance. It is slightly better than my last insurance company, but not by much. Is this quote negotiable? Or it is what it is, take it or leave it?""

Car Insurance..6 Points..(read on)?

https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/does-compare-meerkat-do-cheap-car-insurance-william-golden/"

0 notes

filipeteimuraz · 6 years

Text

How to Increase Clicks by Mastering Your Headlines

What draws people to your content?

In the past, I’ve explained how to write introductions that make the rest of your post irresistible. But before readers can even have a chance to read your intros, they’ll need to click on your headline.

Headlines go way beyond just blog posts. This is something you need to focus on for every piece of content you produce.

Whether it’s a new video on your website or a breaking news story you’re sharing via social media, it all starts with a captivating headline.

Obviously, you want people to consume the content you’re producing. But the reality is they probably won’t. According to research from HubSpot, 43% of readers just skim through posts.

But if your goal is to get clicks and drive traffic to a landing page, all you need to do is focus on the title.

That’s because 80% of people will read a headline. So there’s a good chance your headlines will be seen by most of your audience. Now, it’s just up to you to make sure it’s appealing enough to get clicks.

Include a number

Numbers are a great way to draw attention to your post and increase clicks. That’s because readers know what to expect when they see a number in the title.

I use them when I’m writing my blog posts all the time. Here’s a recent headline I used for an article about how to monitor your competition.

When someone stumbles upon this headline, they know exactly what the post will entail. Basically, it’s going to be a list of 10 different tools.

As I mentioned, readers like to skim through content. Lists are appealing because they make it easy to bounce from one point to another.

The reader doesn’t have to read every single word to scan through this list. As a result, they are more likely to click on it.

But what numbers should you use? According to research-based 2017 Facebook engagement data, these are the top ten performing numbers:

Numbers that are increments of five make up four of the top five results on this list.

But that doesn’t mean you should include numbers like 50 or 100. As you can see, none of the top ten results include numbers higher than 20.

That’s because people don’t want to spend all day reading your content. They know it will take only a few minutes or so to skim through a list of 10. But anything upward of 20 is much less appealing and won’t produce as many clicks.

Don’t overlook the length

Don’t ramble. Your headline shouldn’t be as long as an introduction. But it shouldn’t be only a few words either.

One sentence or fragment of a sentence should put you in a good spot to get clicks. That’s because it provides your audience with enough information to grab their attention.

Research shows that headlines between 16 and 18 words produce the most engagement:

Analyze your current headlines.

If they are fewer than ten words, it could be the main reason why you’re getting an unsatisfactory number of clicks. On the flip side, if your headlines have a word count that’s pushing 30, it’s still not optimized for the highest engagement.

Don’t get carried away here. Your headline needs to make sense and read well.

Adding or removing a couple of words just to fit within the 16 to 18 range isn’t going to help you if the title doesn’t make any sense.

In addition to your word count, you should also consider the number of characters in your headline.

Take a look at the data analysis in this article from Contently:

As you can see from the graph, headlines with the highest click-through rates have between 90 and 99 characters.

Interestingly enough, the title of this post is,

According to a study, There’s a Good Chance You’ll Click This Headline Because It’s 97 Characters.

The character count falls within the recommendations of the research.

Have you noticed anything else about this title? I’m sure you’re not in the habit of counting words. Truthfully, I’m not either. But for the sake of this post, I’ve been paying more attention to this.

The article from Contently has 16 words in the title. This aligns with the research on word count and its relationship to engagement I talked about earlier.

It hits the mark for both categories.

Basically, if you can write headlines that are between 16 to 18 words and have 90 to 99 characters, you’ll be putting yourself in the best position to get the most possible clicks.

Shock your audience

Come up with a headline that is too intriguing for readers to pass up on.

Make your audience ask themselves “huh?” or “is this even possible?”

Shocking headlines are sometimes referred to as click-bait. It’s okay to do it as long as you are not letting your readers down with your content.

Here’s what I mean by this. If you are going to use a shocking headline, the content had better deliver as promised.

Take a look at this old blog post I wrote about how I made $1 million with a Ferrari:

What a throwback picture! I almost don’t recognize myself with all that hair.

But this is the type of article that generates clicks because the headline is so shocking. It draws the attention of readers for several reasons.

First of all, a Ferrari is a well-known sports car recognized internationally. They are expensive and turn heads whenever they are seen on the road.

Second, I don’t know anyone who wouldn’t be interested in how to make a million bucks. And there’s a way to make money with a sports car? The title is too intriguing to ignore.

It makes the user question if that’s actually possible.

You can come up with headlines like this as well. Think of something exciting you’ve accomplished. Put it into your headline.

Set a benchmark

Another way to get people to click on your headlines is to use a benchmark.

Show them how they can achieve something by clicking on your post and reading more information. For example, let’s say your company sells dietary supplements.

A benchmark headline could say,

How you can lose 30 pounds in the next 30 days.

This strategy combines the benchmark method with the previous tactic of using a shock factor. Losing 30 pounds is extreme on its own. But doing it in 30 days? That’s something that even people who aren’t trying to lose weight would be interested in reading.

Just make sure your headlines are realistic. You want to set a benchmark that’s attainable.

Check out this example from my blog where I discuss how to get more Twitter followers:

The benchmark here is 10,000.

It’s a high number, but it’s still realistic. If the title said, “How to get 10 million Twitter followers,” it would be much less believable.

For most people, reaching 10 million followers on social media is unrealistic. I know my blog audience. I’m speaking to entrepreneurs and business owners, not celebrities.

I set this benchmark at a number I think they can reach.

Discuss relevant topics

Your headlines need to be relevant to a few different things.

First of all, they need to be appropriate for your brand and voice. If your business is in the music industry, you shouldn’t be writing headlines about how to survive an earthquake.

Yes, that example may be a bit drastic, but I’m sure you understand what I’m talking about.

Second, your headlines must be relevant in terms of their timing. If you’re reporting a news story that happened two weeks ago, you’re too late. That headline is meaningless now.

Here’s a great example of a relevant headline from Harper’s BAZAAR:

As a magazine that specializes in fashion trends, pop culture, and beauty advice, it uses a headline on topic for the brand. It hits the mark for our first component of relevance.

This article discusses fashion trends for the spring and summer of 2018.

But notice when it was published. The article was released on February 22, 2018. So the timing is perfect as well.

If it came out in the spring or summer, it would be too late. Readers aren’t going to click on something that’s old news. The time to buy their spring and summer clothing is before the season starts.

Teach your readers “how to” do something

If you’ve been reading my blog for a while, you know I’m a big fan of creating informative guides teaching you how to do certain things.

If you are an expert in a particular field or industry, use your extensive knowledge to your advantage. Create step-by-step guides for your readers.

In addition to being informative, such posts are also a great way to get lots of clicks.

Here’s something else you need to take into consideration. Sure, you’ll be sharing your content on all your distribution channels. But that’s not the only way your content will be seen.

You’ll also need to write headlines based on organic traffic. Your organic traffic comes from unpaid search engine results.

If someone needs help accomplishing something, what do you think they’ll type into Google? There’s a good chance they’ll type the words “how to,” so it’s in your best interest to include these words in your headlines for SEO purposes.

Take a look at this article from BuildFire:

First of all, the content of this article is relevant to the brand—a topic I discussed above.

But based on this headline, it’s clear the post will show people how to do something.

BuildFire specializes in everything related to mobile applications. More specifically, they handle custom app development.

So they recognized the search terms someone would put into Google. Here’s a look at what I’m referring to:

Aside from a paid advertisement, this post from BuildFire is the top search result based on its headline.

If you can master your SEO skills, you’ll get plenty of clicks just by occupying the top position on Google. In fact, in 2017 the top position received 20.5% of all Google clicks.

Those click-through rates drop down to 13% for the second and third positions, which is still good but a significant drop from the top spot’s rate.

As you’ve seen from a few of my examples in this guide, I practice what I preach. Look again at the title of the post you’re reading right now. I’m teaching you “how to” do something, and my headline reflects that.

Conclusion

If you want people to read your content, you need to entice them to click on your headline before you can do anything else.

If you are just trying to drive more traffic to specific pages, writing an engaging headline is the best way to do this.

Writing a headline shouldn’t be taken lightly. There is science behind it.

Add a number. Readers love to scan content, so a numbered list with fewer than 20 topics is one of my favorite ways to generate clicks.

As you can see from the research I discussed, the length of your headlines is important as well. You need to consider both the word and character count to make your title as efficient as possible.

Use a shocking headline to wow your audience and generate clicks. Set an attainable benchmark. Just make sure all your content is relevant and released at appropriate times based on titles.

“How to” articles also produce lots of clicks. Your SEO skills should be applied to every headline you write to increase your organic traffic.

If you follow this guide, you’ll see a significant surge in your click-through rates based on your new and improved headlines.

What types of headlines do you write that encourage readers to click on your content?

https://www.quicksprout.com/2018/05/30/how-to-increase-clicks-by-mastering-your-headlines/ Read more here - http://review-and-bonuss.blogspot.com/2018/05/how-to-increase-clicks-by-mastering.html

0 notes

homelesshaunts-blog · 7 years

Photo

Homeless Haunts

Family Man by Jeff Gelb

No more big house, but a man has a need for a much smaller house, one enough room for a family man...

Homeless Haunts welcomes you. I'm Lavel Wideman, your Bloghost of Horror.

After his wife dies he's set alone. A man bury's his wife and tries not to think of her, and not so heavily. His mind imprinted of years they spent together in the house. An invitation from his son makes him realize, a move is what his father needs. Maybe a good omen to turn over a new leaf. His search for the perfect house didn't take him long but it's not the house the problem, it's the occupants who live in the house he's found, that are. Previous owners, who may not be able to move away so easily...

The Family Man by Jeff Gelb

After the funeral, I returned to the home Sarah and I had shared for the last twenty-six years. As soon as I entered the comfortable colonial house, I knew I'd have to move. Sarah's presence was everywhere. She'd decorated the whole thing, and spent hours each week keeping it spotless. Whenever I smelled Comet, or Lysol, or furniture polish, I was immediately reminded of her.

And right then, that was something I didn't want. I mean, don't get me wrong--I loved my wife, always have. She and I went back a long way--to high school, in fact, where she was the homecoming queen and I was the class president. It was pretty stereotypical, but somehow it worked. It worked even though we married two months before I was drafted into the Big War. It worked even though we had to live with my folks for the first three years of out marriage, in the attic of a cramped little dump on the wrong side of town...It worked even though our kid Jerry, was a mistake who almost miscarried during a particularly rough pregnancy that kept Sarah off her feet most of the time. After that, we'd decided not to chance a second pregnancy, and I got real good with rubbers till Sarah went through menopause.

Yeah, we were pretty damn good together. Jerry, now thirty-four and living out on the West Coast with a wife and kid of his own, would tease us about still being on our honeymoon after forty years. He wasn't quite right, but he wasn't far from it. It really was a pretty solid relationship...

But now she was gone, and our beautiful house seemed like it was closing in on me. Funny--in fifty-nine years, I never realized I was claustrophobic...Back at the funeral, Jerry had invited me back to Los Angeles to spend some time with his family, and truth to tell, it was a pretty appealing invitation. Sarah and I had visited Jer once a year every year since his radio career had taken him from Rochester to Southern California some dozen years ago. We'd come to love the area...Jesus, the housing is expensive out here! I had this fantasy the money I'd made off my house in Rochester would pay for home out here and maybe even leave me a little neat egg. Boy, was I wrong.

It was a scorcher of a winter's day in January...I got caught in one of those quintessential Southern California freeway traffic jams...

I knew I'd get lost negotiating surface streets but anything was better than that freeway. So I attempted to fake my way up to Westwood...Kinda nice, too, with older homes that had been well kept.

...Finally I looked at my watch and figured I'd better get on to Westwood if I wanted to talk to anyone about getting work. And that's when I saw it.

The house sat by itself, on a big corner lot, sharing the space with a lamppost and a "Dead End" sign. Behind it was one of those bizarre oil rigs you see all the time in California. State-owned property I guessed. The house itself was colonial, kind of like the home I'd recently sold. That's what caught my eye. That; and the handpainted "For Sale" sign that stood in the tall grass of the front lawn. That lawn needed tending, I thought with a smile. My fingers itched for a lawn mower and a pair of shears.

On impulse, I parked in the driveway and strode up to the front door. As I awaited an answer to my knocking...

A young girl, maybe fourteen, answered the door. Pretty as a picture, too, with delicate features and long blond hair. She looked like she could afford to spend a little more time in the sun. Maybe she'd been ill.

"Uh...hi," I started sheepishly. "Saw the sign out front," I pointed.

"You want to talk to Irv," she enthused, opening the screen door and pulling me inside the house...

"The girl turned, smiling, and yelled up the carpeted staircase. "Irv! Company!"

"Hi there!"

I must have jumped visibly, because I heard the little boy laugh. I turned toward the voice.

"Irv?"

"That's me!" He held out his hand and I took it, almost recoiling. His hand was as cold and slimy as a dead fish...He wiped perspiration from his forehead. "Here about the house?"

"Well, yes, I am. Though, to be honest, I doubt I could afford it."

"Oh, you'd be surprised. Actually, it's been on the market awhile and no one's bet...

"Well..." I was uncomfortable talking money in front of the man's family, but obviously he wasn't.

"Sixty-nine five."

"I beg your pardon?" I asked.

"Sixty-nine five," Irv repeated. "That's what I'm asking."

"...That's quite reasonable, Irv. What's wrong? Got termites?"

"I...I'm getting a divorce." He looked at his beautiful wife and children. "Guess you could say I'm just not a family man..."

"I'll have to think about it," I said...

Irv looked like he'd just eaten a raw onion. "I...have to be out of here by the end of the month. Going back home, to Idaho."

I had the realtor hire some guys to give the house the once-over, and when they came back with their okays, I revisited Irv with my checkbook...

Irv hovered over me like a pesky fly while I signed the check and the papers, and I thought he was going to kiss me as I left, he was so jubilant...

On my way out, Irv's realtor confided that his client "wasn't well," and he pointed to the side of his head, making circles. No kidding, I thought.

...I looked back at the house--at my house, or what would be my house in a week, after Irv and his family had moved out...

I turned the key and let myself in...I took my time walking up the stairs, admiring the finish on the wooden banister. I had to admit, whoever'd rebuilt this place had done a fine job.

I heard a noise from one of the bedrooms. I was about to run like hell to a neighbor's house and call the police when the little boy, Robert, stepped out of his bedroom, holding a comic book. He was beaming.

"Hi!" he greeted me innocently.

I laughed nervously. "Well, I hate to be blunt, but how come you and the children are still here?"

Barbara and her kids sat together, backs to one wall, while I sat on the floor against the opposite wall. No one spoke--it was all very uncomfortable.

She obviously didn't know what to say, and I felt terrible for her.

"Do you need more time," I started, "to get packed up? Because that's fine with me. I'll just come back tomorrow...or next week. Whatever," I shrugged.

"We don't really have anywhere else to go," she finally said.

"...Do you need someone to help you find a new place?"

She shook her pretty head. "We can't resettle," she said. I noticed the kids had stopped playing and were watching us intently. I was starting to lose my cool. "Well, I'm sympathetic, but you have to understand, you can't live here..."

"Well, we don't really live here," Barbara said, the hint of a smile on her face.

Was this whole family batty?..."I think I will take you up on that offer for a beer," I said.

Robert bounded to his feet and ran through the kitchen door. I mean to say, he ran through the damned thing, like one of those haunted house movies...

Barbara smiled and said, "Irv tried, he really did...But he'd never been married before and I'm afraid we were, in the end, a bit much for him."

"Like he said," I recalled aloud, "he isn't a family man."

By now the kids had floated to my side, the three of them forming a semicircle around me. Robert bobbed up and down in the air excitedly.

ALLEY OF FEAR

It's a frightening discovery when the house you just bought doesn't belong to you, not outrightly. Perhaps what you invested in, that nest egg, is a true bonfide haunted house with a family of ghost to come with it.

The house is not necessarily a normal purchase, but the saying goes "we live together, we die together" is a statement that goes a long way.

A house that contains a woman and her children, one boy and one girl, were murdered in this quaint little colonial home; is a house like the old one he's had but smaller and more efficient. Is just right for him to live in without feeling the walls closing in on him. But only one thing stops him from having that homey feel. Is not yet reached when he finds out the house comes with a deal: "You take the house, we come with it" deal."

A family of ghost cannot pick up and go and not so fast. The last guy couldn't take it anymore and wasn't the typical "family man." And hadn't the experience to be a family man. Instead it takes a man who has enough guts, what we call machismo in handling this situation. A man who can complete a circle i.e. " family man."

A house that waits for the right guy to come along and take this position in a world where a house like this sits. And when you can hear floors creak, the doors squeak, the closing of a refrigerator door fetching beer. Making certain in this home, you're not alone.

There are many who don't know where to go or where to call "Home." But in this story I beg the differ...

The Alley of Fear for the time being may be the best place for right now. May not be the deal of a lifetime but the Alley of Fear may beat waiting for someone to complete a family. Especially, if he's not gung-ho about filling a position which isn't his fault and that's the difference.

But however long it takes, we have a family waiting for someone to fill a position in an empty house: a house that sits by the sideway with cobwebs and rickety floors. While they wait it will be in the Alley of Fear and for the time being; they'll wait here for that knock at that door until their story is told.

Good evening ladies and gentlemen. In your own homes and if you have one?

Homeless Haunts bringing the world of the poor to your door.

All rights preserved at Boot Productions 2017

0 notes