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#which... im sure i will regret in a few days time
totentnz · 15 days
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*dusts off hands* another day another draft, goodnight
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wverytime i want to make a post i am reminded that it needs context to not sound fucking insane but then i realize that the context is equally if not more insane
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nereidprinc3ss · 1 month
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come on home
in which the only person who can comfort you after your breakup with spencer reid, is spencer reid
inspired by the song "summer's end" by the artist currently known as phoebe bridgers
wc 2857
warnings: gn!reader (correct me if im wrong), minor mommy issues, angst, happy ending
a/n: thank you to the person who requested this:) u r an angel and I listened to this song the whole time i wrote (if you haven't heard, listen!!) i sincerely hope you enjoy, i like this one a lot<3
She hung up on you. 
Forty-seven minutes of being insulted and berated after you’d called her looking for comfort, and you put up with every single cruel word—just for your mother to hang up on you. And it’s exactly the kind of thing she’d do, so you shouldn’t be surprised. An ache, you’d expect—but it shouldn’t sting like this. You thought you knew better. 
Now you’re in a ball on your couch, clutching your phone to your chest and crying. There’s no point hiding it. Your roommate is out with her girlfriend for the evening—which is too bad because even though you feel like being alone, you’re sure that’s the wrong call. Your other friends are out having fun tonight, too. They’d even invited you, but you turned them down. Look where that had gotten you. Obviously, your mother is not the person you’re about to run to for comfort, either. 
You try to pretend, while you’re thinking of all these people who have ever cared for you, that Spencer Reid isn’t on your mind at all. You try to pretend like you don’t care that the person who loved you until you believed you actually deserved it is a contact going stale deep in the bowels of your text cache. With bleary eyes you scroll down, looking for your conversation where it gathers dust—the end of your relationship was a mutual decision, and you’re friendly, but you haven’t texted in a few weeks. Probably because every time the conversation starts to feel a little too easy, or the phone call lasts a little too long, that aching void in your chest gets worse and worse. Like pain in a phantom limb, you become acutely aware of what you do not have and how much it hurts.  
So blame it on the tears, or the mind-muddling melodrama of your relationship with your mother, blame it on anything but the truth—when your thumb drops on that call button like the plunger on a syringe, you don’t regret it.  
What you’re not expecting is for him to answer after the first ring. 
“Hi,” you say with a snuffle before Spencer can get a word in. There’s a brief interlude, in which you pick at your nails, comfortable to just sit in silence if that’s what he wants. As long as he’s there. 
“Hi.” Hearing his voice instantly melts a bit of the weight you hadn’t realized you were carrying. Another pause, for which you remain silent, because you can feel him formulating a question—and you’d like to hear him speak again. “...am I allowed to ask if you’re okay?” 
Your lips purse and twist to the side, pained and comforted by how easily he can tell that you’re distraught. One word across a tinny connection, and he knows. 
“No. Yes. I mean... I guess that’s why I called you. But you don’t have to ask me about it.” You sniff again and take a deep breath. “How was your day? What state are you in?” 
“I’m in the district,” he answers after a moment, easing into a casualness that he likely doesn’t feel for your sake. Wind crunches through the speaker. He probably just got out of work. “My day was... it was good. I got to talk about my job to a bunch of elementary schoolers, which is always a confidence boost.” 
You chuckle, still laying on your side on the couch and watching storm clouds gathering outside. 
“Nice, nice. What else?” 
“Let’s see... I forgot lunch, so I had three oranges, and they were actually pretty good. I reread Game of Thrones—I don’t know why I did that. I’m never going to like that book.” 
“Masochist,” you smile. He laughs, and you hear the sound of a car door opening. 
“Oh! I talked to my mom. Believe it or not, she says hi.” 
A completely inadvertent snort constitutes your response. It’s not what you meant to do, and out of context it’s sort of mean, but you actually think it’s incredibly endearing that he still talks to his mother about you. He scrambles to explain himself. 
“I swear, we barely talked about you this time. Mostly we talked about her new boyfriend Leonard.” 
“No, no, that’s not... I’m sorry, I’m not laughing at you or your mom. That’s really sweet, actually. Tell her I say hi too.” 
When he next speaks, you can hear the smile in his voice. 
“I will.” Another long pause. You imagine him sitting in the parking lot at Quantico, keys vertical in the ignition of his old car and feeling the silence just as much as you are. He surprises you by not ending the conversation—instead he asks a question. It is concern, poorly disguised with nervous humor. Or maybe you just know him too well. “Do I get to find out what’s on your mind, or are you leaving me in suspense here?”  
You bite the inside of your cheek. 
“Um... well, actually, I just got off the phone with my mom, too. It didn’t go so well,” you laugh halfheartedly, “I know it was dumb to try and have an actual conversation with her, but... you know me. Always following blind optimism to the depths of hell.” 
“Why’d you call your mom?” he asks, so gently it brings a fresh round of tears to your eyes. Still, you attempt to put a cheerful affect on your strained voice. 
“Mm, you know. Just needed someone to talk to.” 
Spencer’s knowing sigh does little to make you feel better. 
“You know you can always talk to me, right? I know it’s... it’s different now, but... I care about you a lot. And, you know, I receive very few phone calls, so the line is pretty much always open.” 
Your laugh quickly devolves into a cry. 
“I appreciate that, but I can’t talk to you about everything.” 
“Why not?” he pleads immediately, voice thin and desperate like it’s his most burning question. A million lies dance over the tip of your tongue. A million things that feel safer to say than the truth. But in the end, it comes out anyway—choked, and so quiet, but aloud nonetheless. 
“Because I’m trying really hard to stop missing you so much.” 
Another long beat of silence. The back of your throat feels dry and hollow—a cage for your hummingbird heart. 
“If it hurts too much to talk to me, you don’t need to do that to yourself. But I also don’t want you to hurt yourself thinking you’re alone. You are... so important to me. I will always try to take care of you the best I can—whether that means staying away or being at your front door. If you ever need me, or even... vaguely want me, I will be there.” 
Each word caves your resolve. Each syllable is a slap in the face to progress you’d been pretending to make. You can be strong—you've proven that over the past ten weeks. You can be stone-faced and slash at your heart until the scar tissue is thick and jagged, and eventually it won’t hurt anymore. But maybe, by letting someone tend to the wounds, they’ll heal a little nicer. A little kinder. Even if you can’t undo the damage, maybe one day you’ll be soft again. 
“What if I vaguely want you right now?” you sniffle. 
Finally, you hear the silver jingle of keys turning. The sputter and rumble of an old engine coming to life. 
“Then I’m on my way.” 
Twenty four minutes later, there’s a soft knock at your door.  
After the call had ended, you’d wondered if you made it all up. Surely your ex-boyfriend wasn’t actually about to show up at your apartment. Someone you’ve grieved for can’t just come back—there are countless horror novels and movies based upon that very tenet. Does it matter if they ever actually died? How long is ten weeks, really? It feels like a lifetime. 
You shuffle across the room, wiping under your eyes with your already damp sleeves, and undoing all the locks Spencer had conditioned you to start using. When the door cracks open, and you see Spencer standing there, windswept and concerned, for the first time in months, it hits you like a tidal wave. You are, beyond a shadow of a doubt, still just as in love with him as you ever were. The relief that floods your veins as he looks down at you with so much care in his eyes is like sinking into warm water. It’s a dead giveaway, and maybe it makes this whole thing a terrible idea, but you can’t seem to care very much. You open the door wider, and he enters, and he stands in your kitchen with his hands in his coat pocket as you shut the door and he’s perfect. It dawns on you that for the first time since the breakup, you feel safe. Like you don’t have to be a stone pillar anymore. This, of course, translates into even more tears, which you try to hide as you face away, re-locking the door.  
“Sweetheart...” he sighs, because you can’t hide anything from him. Hearing the resonance of his voice so close to you once more is overwhelming. In an instant you’re rushing into his arms, and he accepts you without hesitation. You bury your teary face in the vetiver safety of his button-up and slip your arms under his coat, as if you could absorb his warmth and forever hide from the world that way. He pulls you even closer. It’s terrible and cruel how much he is exactly what you needed. “What’s wrong? What did she say?” 
You shake your head and gasp a small sob. 
Truthfully, you’re not really crying about the petty insults from your mother anymore. You’re back to square one, the reason you’d called your mother to begin with—you miss the man whose arms are currently wound around your shoulders. 
His hand smooths over the back of your hair. 
“Okay. That’s okay. We don’t have to talk about it.” 
You stay like that—content even as you cry because being with him feels so much safer than being alone. It feels right—or perhaps it’s just familiar. You don’t know which is worse.  
Spencer is rubbing soothing lines up and down your back as you cling to him, soaking him up in all his ephemeral, comforting glory. He surprises you by chuckling—it vibrates through his chest, buzzing against your ear. 
“Nice Magritte print. I bet the person who bought that has fantastic taste.” 
“Are you gonna ask for it back?” you mumble into the fabric of his suit jacket. He is, of course, referring to the painting you’d more or less stolen from his apartment seven months ago. You really don’t want him to take it home. It’s the most overt Spencer memorabilia you’d allowed yourself to keep in plain sight. 
“No, baby. You can keep it.” The words are low, and kind, and they settle you some, but you can’t seem to get him close enough. “What can I do?” he whispers after a moment, helpless as you take a shuddering breath. “Can I make you tea? Have you eaten?” 
“Will you just... stay for a little bit? I’ll—I promise I’ll stop crying.” 
There is an unexpected lull where you thought you’d receive pretty immediate agreement, but before you can pull back and ask what’s wrong, he murmurs, “yeah. I can stay for a while. But you have to kick me out before it gets too late.” 
You wonder if you’re imagining the double-entendre that seems to underline his words in bold red ink. Spencer is too smart to have not noticed a thing like that. You don’t mention it—it all boils down to the same unspoken idea. 
Don’t let me stay, because I might not leave. 
“I will,” you sniff, finally stepping back and wiping your own tears. It hurts to lose his touch, but at least you know he’s not going anywhere for the next few hours. This, as opposed to everything else lately, can be a beginning instead of an end.  
At least, until he goes home. 
Three and a half hours later, after tea, an impromptu dinner comprised mostly of cheese and crackers, and several vinyl changes on your record player (which served only as background noise for your long, ambling conversations), things are seeming to wind down to a natural stopping point. Which you hate. The whole time you’d had a dull ache in your chest because talking to him was easier than breathing and you knew it wouldn’t last. There had been one or two false bottoms already—the first when you’d yawned around nine, and the second when you’d gotten up to do your skincare and brush your teeth half an hour later. Even then he’d just leaned against the doorframe, watching your reflection above the sink as you talked for fifteen more minutes. Now you stand across from each other in the kitchen, plates restacked and everything in order. Of course he’d insisted on helping you clean up. 
“I should go,” he says, with a soft sort of finality in his voice.  
“Is your carriage turning into a pumpkin?” you tease gently, to hide how much you don’t want him to leave. He smiles—a small, weary thing—but genuinely and endlessly charmed by you. 
“That among other things.” 
“Would you—would you walk me to my room first?” 
The hesitance is clear in his eyes and the way his lips part as if to say, ‘I don’t think that’s a good idea’, but you're sure he’s really going to leave in a moment and you’re also sure he won’t deny you this one small thing before he does. 
“Okay.” 
It’s a short, silent walk through the living room and down the hall to your bedroom door, but you can feel him trailing behind you the whole way. You stop in front of your open door, turning face to face with him.  
“Thanks,” you murmur.  
His lips pull into a melancholy smile. 
“Anytime.” 
There’s nothing left to do but wrap your arms around each other once more, tuck yourself into the you-sized space between his head and shoulder and hold on for as long as he’ll let you. The hug lingers for longer than is wise. Spencer adjusts his arms looped around your waist, pulling you closer, and you nuzzle against his neck, grateful that at least he seems as reluctant to let this end as you are.  
But eventually, it relaxes. Your hold on each other loosens. His face is just inches from yours, and you get to study every plane and valley and line like you’d thought you never would again. It seems he’s doing the same—losing himself in the luxury of seeing you up close. 
“Will you kiss me goodnight?” you whisper, unable to muster any self-consciousness though you know it’s a fool’s errand. Spencer strokes your waist. 
“I can’t do that, honey.” 
“Why not?” 
His voice is just as quiet as yours. It falters slightly as he speaks, so gently, so patiently. 
“Because we’re not together anymore.” 
“Why not?” 
Your feeble, desperate supplication sounds pitiable even to you. You’re not proud, but you can’t find it in yourself to be ashamed, either. All you want is an answer. But it’s like a child asking why the sky is blue, or the earth is round. There is a definitive explanation, but mostly, the adult will shrug, and say, that’s just how it is. 
Spencer’s eyes squeeze shut. His head tilts down. 
“We can’t do this again, sweetheart. You know why we’re not together.” 
In theory—yes. You’d had so many conversations when you’d broken up. It had been a long, painful process, spanning multiple all-nighters at his kitchen table, nursing coffee and trying to convince each other and yourselves that it was the right choice. But it just feels like a horrible, horrible mistake. You feel desperate to explain this to him before he slips away again—the words come out flustered, inelegant as you cling to him.
“But I don’t think I’m getting better without you. I tried, I tried so hard to be good on my own, but everything is worse and harder and—and we weren’t sure about it then, and I don’t think it was the right choice, because I still really need you. Like, all the time. I’m—it’s not getting better without you. Nothing got better.” 
He swallows, eyes darting between yours for an infinite second. You’re breathless and your heart is pounding after your confession—you can feel your eyes stinging with the few tears that managed to escape as you spoke. 
“Everything is worse,” he agrees shakily. “Everything. I’m—I’m getting disciplinary infractions from Hotch like I’m a child because I can’t focus on anything. Game of Thrones is the most complex literature I can comprehend right now. I had to use a calculator the other day.” 
You want to laugh, but nothing is funny until he’s yours again. 
“Then come back. Please come back, Spencer.” 
Finally, he leans closer, until your heads are pressed together, and his nose bumps yours, feather light. You're dizzy. You exhale. He inhales. 
“I don’t think I knew how to leave in the first place.” 
When he kisses you, it feels like home. 
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ma1dita · 3 months
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crazy little thing
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a ‘partners in crime’ installment - luke castellan x dionysus!reader
words: 3.4k
summary: (pre-established relationship) The one where he spends all his drachmas to make you smile. Sometimes, the Apollo kids are better matchmakers than Aphrodite herself. Everyone’s tired of you two dancing around each other. Luke Castellan x fem!Dionysus!reader
a/n: lil valentines day special though im working on more est. relationship fluff after this!! happy season 2 renewal babies
(posted 2/9/24 unbetaed)
“Come on, you gotta admit—it’s kinda funny!” 
Luke is met with blank stares at the camp store after he places a few drachmas onto the folding table in front of the Apollo kids. They’re not sure if he’s trying to convince them, or himself.
Because yeah, that’s the excuse he goes for, wanting to spend his savings on having them sing to a certain head counselor instead of admitting his blatantly obvious feelings, so if you ask Lee Fletcher and his half-siblings, it’s kind of pathetic.
“What do we look like, a traveling mariachi band, Castellan?” he deadpans, watching the usually confident boy scratch the back of his neck with his face red like someone who’s been sitting out in the sun for too long. 
“I’m not saying to follow her around all day or whatever, just pick a random time to sing a song and catch her off-guard,” he insists, before meeting the judgmental look of one of Lee’s younger siblings.
Lee chuckles, ruffling his sister’s hair before looking at Luke quite seriously, “She’s a good friend. You’re gonna have to pay us more than that. Special song for a special lady after all.”
The son of Hermes knows he’s gonna regret this sooner or later, but proceeds to throw the rest of his meager earnings onto the table. He has other ways of being resourceful anyway, the box of chocolates he nicked from behind the store counter feeling heavy in his jacket pocket.
“Right…she’s just a friend.”
Luke’s hands fidget at his sides as he stands there, feeling a little stupid.
Lee’s little sister scoops up the coins from the table, her raised eyebrows and light aura mirroring that of her older brother. 
“What song were you thinking?” she asks, “Gotta make sure I know it if I’m singing it to your…friend.”
The 18-year-old boy tugs at his dark curls, getting more embarrassed and wanting to retreat with every minute that passes, but he’s never been one to back down from anything–swordfights, monsters, capture the flag, but this—trying to impress you...is a whole different story somehow.
Why are feelings so damn complicated? 
It feels like being at the butt of a joke, or more accurately—at the sharp edge of a sword, and Luke never lets his fights end in a draw.
“You guys got it covered. Just…surprise me too, I guess,” he sighs, walking off without finishing his sentence. He wishes he could pray a little harder to his dad for luck, even if he’s unsure of what exactly he’s wishing for (or if his dad will even listen).
“Castellan’s hopeless. You think he knows it yet?” the girl asks her brother, to which Lee laughs.
“I don’t think she does either, even though everyone else can see right through them. The new bets are on who’s gonna break first. Chiron’s been keeping track, but don’t tell Mr. D.”
If Luke wants a show, they’ll make sure he’ll get his money’s worth—and hopefully, it’ll push you two along faster. Lee bet on you two getting together before the summer after all, and he’ll be damned if he loses to Clarisse.
Valentine’s Day might be the day of love, but for you, someone who’s single (not by choice), and heavily busy with making sure people aren’t so…enamored in public (you’ve lost count of the reports you’ve written out due to indecent behavior this morning alone)---this just feels like another Wednesday, except with more hormonal teenagers with uncontrollable urges than usual. 
Oh, the joys of being the daughter of the camp director, also known as everyone’s favorite narc.
Honestly, love can suck it. With this much love in the air, you can feel it suffocating you like a plastic bag over your head. 
That’s an uncontrollable urge. Too much?
Maybe Silena was right, you do need to open yourself up more to romantic opportunities. But if you have to watch another person swap spit and get pawed at like they’re the last dinner roll at the table….You might commit arson and set this place ablaze.
You just didn’t understand why people had to go all out today of all days. Shouldn’t love be shown year-round? Though you were a person of theatrics and enjoy a good show, it is amazing how much grandiose displays of affection make you cringe. It felt very performative, instead of genuine, and you would know, you’re the best actress at camp. You’ve acted out stories before, knowing all of the greatest romances and tragedies by heart. And you pride yourself on being a decent teacher to the campers, but for some of them, love still translates to a bad rendition of a ballad they heard on the radio.
Nothing gets past you at this point.
But that sucks too sometimes, you know?
Multiple failed flings and a heartbreak or two weigh down on you on days like this one, as you’re stuck being a bystander to outlandish displays put on by the Aphrodite kids being put to work. Love is their domain anyway, and yours…makes you feel a little less undesirable. Each demigod has their own strengths and weaknesses, but perhaps in the name of love, some of them don’t know how to take a hint. Several forgettable prose readings, a Sparknotes version of Eros and Psyche, and too many red roses to count have you reeling from exhaustion and a bit of disgust—-and it’s only lunchtime. 
So yeah, maybe you’re a little jealous; they could call you Nemesis at this point.
The only flowers you got today were from the little kids from along the path to the strawberry orchard, and though it’s sweet—the human side of you misses affection. 
Devotion. 
To be a daughter of Dionysus meant to deal in extremes, obsession or nothing, and there are very few people who can handle that. Always being too much to handle, or uninterested as a defense mechanism. Perhaps that’s what scares admirers away. 
That, or the fact that Luke Castellan is always attached to your hip. To be honest, you’ve always preferred it that way—the both of you working as a pair always gets things done faster around camp and he brightens your mood, whether you admit it or not. 
But you two are just friends. 
Really good friends who look for each other in crowded rooms, hands constantly brushing against the other for comfort, and able to pick up where the other one leaves off. Usually he’s the first person you see in the morning, and the last person you say goodnight to. You know how he likes his coffee and he cuts your apples for you as you two sit together in your unassigned seats in the dining pavilion. You watch each other’s workshops and if one of you is missing, everyone knows to ask the other to get an answer.
Right? That’s totally normal coworker/friend behavior.
If you were ever given immortality, perhaps they’d make you the goddess of denial.
You’re sweeping up confetti from the dining hall floor after an uncoordinated excuse of a flash mob was performed for one of the Demeter kids…and not to sound like a heinous bitch, but maybe next time they should use something biodegradable…or less messy. Sighing deeply, you feel someone’s eyes on you, and when you look up, Luke’s standing there with two full plates of food.
“Take a break, trouble. No one’s paying you overtime,” he jokes, and you roll your eyes as you put the broom aside.
“No one’s paying me at all…” you groan, before taking the plate out of his hands and knocking your head against his shoulder in thanks. He snickers as his hand brushes the small of your back, tickling your spine as he leads you to sit at a table.
“Just another holiday. You know how it is.”
“It’d be nice to have a night off though. Sometimes I regret taking up the position,” you mumble through spoonfuls of soup. He throws his large hand over your shoulder, kneading some tension from your trapezius. Head jerking along with the movements, you giggle as soup dribbles off your spoon, which makes his lips quirk into a small smile. Being around you felt so thoughtless and easy that if you told him to jump off a bridge he’d do it without question, which should be more concerning—the hold you have on him is irrevocable. Feelings are way too difficult for his teenage brain to comprehend at this stage. It’s easier to wash dishes with lava or fight off a dragon (bad example, he knows, but there’s something about you that already makes him feel like he’s losing before anything’s even happened).
Luke is someone who fights until the end, a soldier who’s always trained and so ready that sometimes it makes you wonder what war he’s preparing for. Infatuation, or the scarier, four-letter word was not something he was ever briefed on.
“No, you don’t. You’re a control freak,” he says with a grin. 
Luke watches you play with the pendant on your necklace, the dragon scale he fashioned into your favorite accessory glinting in your hand. Running your fingers back and forth over the smooth surface, your other hand puts the spoon down and you place your head on his shoulder. He thinks if he had to describe the four-letter word on the tip of his tongue, he’d tell whoever’s asking about the way you kissed his healing cheek after you both left the Garden of Hesperides. More than a year later, Luke is still unable to find the right words even if the weakness has made a home in his heart with your name written all over it.
“I swear if I have to hear another person croak out a lovesong I might just drown myself in the Long Island Sound,” you scoff as his fingers trace circles onto your waist.
There’s a low strum of a guitar that reaches your ears and your forehead meets the cool surface of the table as you shut your eyes and grumble. It’s Lee and his half-siblings, beginning to walk through the hall seconds away from singing until they see Luke shaking his head and dragging his finger across his throat to please, gods, stop. The Apollo kids swivel and 180, walking out of the hall as the music stops dissonantly, rolling their eyes and dragging their feet.
“That was quick,” you say inquisitively as your head pops up from the table to see Luke looking off in the distance.
“Heh…I think they were just practicing or something…”
He then had to run off and pay them more drachmas for the inconvenience. 
Fucking hustlers.
The sun sets quickly on Camp Half-Blood since it’s mid-February, and Luke finds you trying to calm your nerves as you look at the mess of glitter and paper mache that covers the arts and crafts hall from floor to ceiling.
“I can’t believe this!” you say in disbelief as you look at Luke, and he takes the can of Redbull out of your shaking hand.  
“There’s just no fucking way everyone decided to use glitter. It’s everywhere! I’m—CONNOR, PUT THE SCISSORS DOWN!”
Luke sighs as he holds his hand out for his younger brother to give up the craft scissors, which he relinquishes with a mischievous grin. 
“Guys, go find trouble somewhere else,” Luke mutters, pushing his head away, and where Connor goes, Travis quickly follows, tossing a canister of glitter back at him and not knowing it was still open.
“Oops.” 
Immediately, the both of you are showered in iridescent particles, floating over your heads and stuck in your hair as the older Stoll brother looks at the two of you wide-eyed.
“You've already got trouble anyway,” he says teasingly, and this asshole winks at Luke before bolting out the door.
The room is silent now, and you pinch the bridge of your nose, before speaking, “I don’t care if he’s your brother, Luke. I might just fucking kill him.” You'd say more but your eyes are shut as you try not to breathe in glitter, and then the sound of the doorknob rattling catches your attention. Luke is standing there, finally faced with a door he can’t open, his eyebrows furrowed in annoyance–but the effect isn’t as menacing as it should be when he’s covered in red and pink sparkles.
“Not if I get to him first, the little bastard.”
“Just open the door,” you say panicked, running over and forcing his hands off the doorknob.
“I can’t if you won’t let me do it!” He grits, elbowing you and trying to unlock the door with both his inherited gift and brute strength.
“What kind of demigod even are you? Lockpicking is supposed to be your thing!”
“Well OBVIOUSLY, but it’s not working, now is it, trouble?”
Luke finishes off the rest of your energy drink before throwing the can over his shoulder and he swears he can hear you cuss at him under your breath as you berate him about the mess, so he chooses to focus on busting the door down instead of looking at the glitter stuck in your eyelashes and thinking about how the idea of being stuck in a room with you makes him feel weak at the knees. Through the window, his eyes meet the group of Apollo kids staring at the predicament you two are in (and the barricade of chairs the Stoll brothers put in front of the door). He sighs, and Lee’s little sister flips him off as they start to walk away again, instruments in tow.
“You gonna charge him again?”
A tiny Will Solace looks at his elders for guidance as they walk along the path. As one of the youngest in the bunch, he especially idolizes anything his half-siblings do, going along with whatever they see fit.
“No, but we’re close enough to the archery range that I might just shoot them through their hearts myself. Eros and Aphrodite themselves are pretty much begging us to,” Lee grumbles.
“Why are we doing this again?” Will babbles, and his half-sister grabs his hand to help him walk faster.
“A crazy little thing called love. You’ll understand it better someday, kid.”
Thankfully, it all starts winding down after dinner. Luke finds you leaning against a tree flipping through your clipboard during the camp sing-along, so he tugs at your elbow to get your attention.
“Wanna get out of here?”
You look at him, slotting your pen behind your ear as you notice faint glitter particles still dotted along his cheeks. As your lips pull into a small smile, you say, "I still have a few things to do after this, don't you?"
"Cleared your schedule for the night," he mumbles, and whether it's the glow of the bonfire or he's actually blushing, a teasing expression crosses your face as you step closer and cross your arms at him.
"You cleared my schedule for the night. How on earth did you do that?"
Instead of a proper reply, he grabs your hand, tugging you out to the docks near the lake.
"Don't worry about it."
He's not going to tell you that he owes Chris and Annie a few favors before the end of the month to make up for the night shift they ended up taking. Instead, you both sit cross-legged at the edge of the dock, a gentle breeze brushing at your clothes and for the first time today, you're able to just exist.
"I hate Valentine's Day," you suddenly say, looking up at the night sky, and he's watching you closely as the gentle shine of the moon casts a cool glow on your face. Luke cringes at your statement, thinking he's already thrown away his shot.
"Why's that?"
"Tell me something Luke, am I unlikable? Like, is there anything wrong with me?"
He looks at you like you've told him you’re secretly a cyclops.
“The fuck? How many times do I have to tell you that everyone thinks you’re great?"
You don't even give him a chance to finish his sentence before you blurt, "I don’t want to be great, I want to be loved!" Reeling back a little, you lean back on your hands to create some distance.
 “Sorry... that was a lot, and I’m just...wanting to be noticed. It's nice to have people's attention sometimes, you know?”
You’ve got all of mine, he thinks, realizing he never stood a chance at fighting it—this four-letter feeling you give him is the first and only battle he’ll back down from, and you're the only person he’ll wholeheartedly surrender to.
In short, he’s fucked.
"I always notice you." He pulls out a dented box of chocolates from his jacket pocket, opening it up for the both of you to share, and the look of amusement on your face makes him glad that at least one thing somewhat went to plan today, even if the chocolate truffles are a bit smushed. You’re popping one into your mouth and his dark eyes follow the trail of your fingers to your mouth, feeling his heart beat a bit faster.
But then you both hear the soft strum of a guitar from near the trees, and the two of you turn to hear some of the Apollo kids singing beautifully along the coastline.
I'll be seeing you, in all the old, familiar places...That this heart of mine embraces...
You gasp, grabbing Luke’s arm to push yourself up so that the both of you can turn and face a small group of your closest Apollo friends singing to the both of you. Luke’s eyes soften further when he feels you grab his hand and squeeze, leaning against his shoulder as you listen.
“Did you do this?” you mumble, still entranced by the performance.
“Only if it makes you laugh.”
And you do, in the way that he loves—a bit crazy and too loud, and it’s perfect.
I’ll always think of you that way…I’ll find you in the morning sun….
Whether it’s fireflies or Will bouncing light off the water to look like small, glowing candles, Luke can’t tell—he’s too busy watching your lips pull into a smile so confectionery his sweet tooth starts to ache. The little kid was never good at archery like his other half-siblings, but as your eyes shimmer under the ambient lights, you think his added romantic gesture shot you straight through the heart.
“You know, sometimes I really do hate you, Luke Castellan,” you whisper, and it couldn’t be more far from the truth.
“No, you don’t.”
His eyes flicker to you again, but you’re already looking back at him.
“I don’t.”
And when the night is new, I’ll be looking at the moon…but I’ll be seeing you…
It’s quiet now, and you’re unsure of where the Apollonian ensemble disappeared to but instead of worrying about if they’ll make it back before curfew, you stand there in front of Luke with your guard down.
Getting a little closer than he expected, your noses brush before you pull the slightly crushed wildflowers from your jean pocket, the only physical reminder you’ve kept from today, and tuck them into his jacket pocket, sitting right above his heart. 
“Thank you.”
Luke doesn’t realize he’s holding his breath until he feels your lips gently kiss the marred skin on his right cheek, the blemish having an uncanny resemblance to a stroke of lightning; it serves as a reminder of his weakness. The lines blur as his eyes close to savor it and he doesn’t know if weakness is your kisses or his scar—but he is vulnerable to it all the same, realizing there’s a crack in the otherwise perfect persona that he’s worked so hard on. When his eyes open again, his Achilles’ heel has taken human form.
“This has got to be cheating,” Clarisse grumbles as she watches from the distance, hidden behind the trees.
“It’s not cheating if I’m winning. Silena’s gonna get a kick out of this,” Lee chuckles, ushering everyone back towards the cabins. It’s a bit harder to do this in the dark as they try to be quiet and not interrupt whatever will happen next between their favorite counselors.
“Well lucky for you, your gifts are cute and romantic, what am I supposed to do? They fight enough!”
“That’s what got them into this mess in the first place. Come on, curfew’s in 10. We’ll find out which of us wins the bet soon enough,” Chris mutters, pushing them along back onto the main path.
“Easy for you to say, Rodriguez, you live with Luke!”
“Would I ever lie to you, La Rue?” he says with a mischievous grin, and the Apollo kids giggle at the irony.
“My body ages,
my anger burns into a seam.
I am so annoyed by love
and still it comes.”
-Kate Baer
ask to be added to luke/general taglists!
luke taglist (some won't let me tag, turn on my post notifs?): @kissingyourgrl @dorcas4meadowes @lorarri @andrewgarfldsgf @noodlesketchbook @10ava01 @poppysrin @ashisabitgay @timhalamet @liv1104 @leeknows-wife @mxtokko @bugcuti3 @luvvfromme @midmourn @2hiigh2cry @yuminako @niktwazny303 @lukecastellandefender @intergalactic-padawan @iliketopgun @annybah @dangelnleif @thegrinningghost @alyssajunelle @obxstiles @m00ng4z3r @visndcaitswhore @b0ok-lover @elegant-face-tree @this-barbie-is-having-breakdowns @amortencjja @idonevenknow1359 @maliaaaa @targaryenluvs @sakyira @dhdjdjjdhsjdiri @number-onekidqueen @bradynoonswife @stevenknightmarc @hoodedhavok @happy-mushrooms @homebyeleven @anotherblackreader @too-deviant @liviessun @lilacspider @theadventuresofanartist @sucker4seresin @simpforsunwoo @zanzie @starrystormwritings
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mcu-coworkers · 10 months
Text
Jealousy
Summary: Miguel can't seem to get his way and for reasons he couldn't believe.
Word count: 2k+
Warnings: None(sneaky Miguel)
A/n: here is pt.3 I hope you guys enjoy I will be giving a pt.4 which will be the final part if anyone would like to be tagged just let me know and I'll be happy to! I hope I got every one who wanted to be tagged in Pt.3 there were so many of you and I just want to sat thank you from the bottom of my heart for loving my story! I hope you guys enjoy!xx
Tags list: @ahopelessromanticwritersworld @m4zapan @luciiferian @stinygirl009 @anonymoussomebody345 @watamoteru @smolrain08 @amberpanda99 @hantheconqueror @mhm-ok-sure @chuckle-nuts. @a-helpless-romantic @witchofwhimsey @rin-matsuoka345-blog @cherripunch26 @anneliese500 @theleftkittycollection @ok-boke @nanushkka @gugggu6gvai @joestarbitch @distractionforyourthoughts @tanchosanke @lokiseason @hao-ming-8 @sport-lova @munixumai @capybaraaa . @dearrdarlingg @riddle-me-im-sirius @melovetitties @liyanahelena @bat1212 @christinesdemoness1958 @musicpookie @luujjvi @ilovejeansosomuch @m0chac0ffee @perrierbottleofproblems @zayxcc @shyshyshy-19 @futuristicpandakid @lilyevans1
Parts: One Two Three^ Four
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Credits to the owner:)^
It had been quite a few months since you removed yourself from the spider society.
You thought that in doing so you lost your friends but Pete, Hobbie, and Gwen all stuck by your side and visited you every now and then.
Not all at once, you didn't want Miguel to figure out that they were coming to you and yell at them for it or worse, come too.
In that aspect everything was great.
When it came to your healing journey, you had good days and bad days.
Or more like bad nights.
During the day you kept busy working in your world's Alchemax, and at night you dealt with spider business which was slow this time around.
This is when you found yourself thinking about him.
The silence of the city only made your thoughts louder and all they reminded you of was Miguel.
But you hadn't given up on your promise to yourself, you would move on.
And then you decided to get a dog.
He was the best choice you could have made, your sweet little milo.
May Day absolutely loved him, she wanted to bring him to her birthday party but to be honest you didn't even know if you’d be taking yourself.
Pete didn't want to hide anything from you so he told you as soon as he found out that Miguel actually agreed to not just let him throw her party at HQ but go to it as well.
Risking him speaking to you and ruining all of your growth was not in your plans.
You had to be honest with yourself, if Miguel spoke to you with the slightest warth you knew you’d break so for your own sake staying away from him was best.
So, that's where you were with all of this, sitting on a rooftop enjoying a slice of pizza thinking about whether you should show up tomorrow or not.
Deciding to call it a night on saving the city you swung home looking forward to Milo’s greeting cuddles.
Back at HQ Miguel watched as everyone scurried to put together the decorations for May Day's birthday.
The chaos was loud and he almost regretted agreeing to it.
“Ay dios.” he mumbled as he walked past Gwen and Hobbie pretending they were there.
“So you think she’ll come? May Day is her favorite spider. She wouldn't miss it, right?” he heard Gwen say.
Suddenly he froze.
“There is a chance if you ask me.  I   believe in her.” Hobbie replied webbing up the sign he was putting on the wall, much easier than tape.
Miguel began walking again hoping no one would notice how he stopped to listen in on the conversation.
Walking into his office space he called for Lyla, “Give me the list of spiders coming to this party.” he said pulling up his screens.
“But boss, that's hundreds?” she asked confused but the request.
“That's fine, just give it to me, Please.” he asked, growing impatient with his AI.
“Alright calm down here it is, Who are we looking for anyways?” she said, sliding it over to him.
“No one, just making sure its a safe list.” he said looking over his shoulder.
Bles mary janes heart for added the yes, no and maybe option it made him easier to see who was actually coming.
All the names had a yes except for one, one big red MAYBE and it was next to yours.
Shoulders dropping in slight disappointment he let out a sigh.
These past months he’d been gloomy.
The only time he perked up was at the mention of your name, but sadly that's as close he got to you these days.
He found out that Pete, Hobbie, Gwen and even fucking Miles anomaly Morales snuck off to see you.
He was jealous.
He hated that you let them into your life.
Each time they came back laughing about something you said, he was jealous.
Everytime they mentioned a fun moment you shared, he was burning in jealousy.
It made him sick. 
His blood boiled knowing someone else was making you laugh when he just wanted to have you to himself.
He liked it when you spent hours in his office “helping him” with reports.
He only ever gave you simple tasks just to keep you at his side.
To watch your face when you were focused on the footage, the way you bite your lip when you think you're getting close. 
The way you kept eye contact and showed interest in whatever it was he said made him think about other things you could do together whilst keeping eye contact.
God, you drove him insane in the best way.
But not having you close like that was driving him insane in the worst way.
Spiders voluntarily left him alone now not wanting to cross him on a bad which now was very frequent.
The only reason he stuck around at the end of team briefings was to see if he’d hear any news on you.
He didn't think anyone noticed his intent, But then there was Jess always on his six.
She knew from day one that you had fallen, but oh was he gonna fall harder and he did.
She saw the way he searched for you in a room, how he’d ask you and only you to help him on reports.
Nothing went past her.
“Did a villain sneak onto the list?” she said, creeping up behind him.
Quickly removing the screen he looked over his shoulder letting out a simple shrug to answer her.
“Just want to see who   I‘ll be dealing with for the evening.” he said trying to cover up his annoyance.
“Anyone stand out?” She asked, raising an eyebrow.
“Nope. All good.” he said standing up, “  I‘ll see you tomorrow Jess, get some rest.” he said leaving his office.
Smiling to herself, Jess knew he was slowly breaking down. 
All it would take to finish the job was see you.
She knew you had RSVP’d to come yesterday but she made Lyla change it just to confirm her suspicions further.
And he did just that.
----
Mentally preparing yourself for today was the hardest part.
You planned out your evening.
Go in, greet everyone, stick to Hobbie, Gwen and Miles, hold May Day, and then make the excuse that Milo had an accident and you had to get back home.
A solid plan.
Suddenly a portal opened and in walked Hobbie, “My lady.” he greeted extending an arm.
Taking his hand you stood up, “Oh, one sec.” you said as you sent a signal activating your suit.
“Woaahhh the new suit is wicked.” he said watching it go on.
“It's nano tech, you like it?” you said as it reached up to your neck before stopping. 
“Killin it, as always.” he said before walking into the portal.
Well, here goes nothing.
“Be good Milo, Mommy will be home soon.” you said, patting his sleepy head before walking in.
Deep breath, here goes nothing.
Walking in you put on your brightest smile.
“Hey! There she is and get a look at this suit, this new?  I   like it!” Peter yelled, taking your hand and spinning you.
“Hey guys! Nice to see everyone again, Miles nice to meet you.” you said laughing.
“Nice to meet you, very nice lady, thank you for not hunting me down.” he said, shaking your hand viciously.
Laughing at your inside joke you pulled him in for a hug secretly taking a peak over his shoulder.
You could feel his stare on you, you just didn't know from where.
The party went on as planned, you stayed cautious, had  a good time with your friends and held May Day until she eventually fell asleep.
Everyone told you that you had a gentle way when it came to kids so falling asleep just came to them naturally.
Taking that as your sign to leave you handed her over to Mary Jane and went to go look for Hobbie.
“Hey, has anyone seen Hobbie?” you asked not being able to find him.
“Rooftop, girly pop.” you heard Jess say as she hugged you goodbye.
“Oh great, we can open a portal there. Bye guys guess  I‘ll  see you around.” you said waving to the rest of the spiders.
Making your way up you looked around the rooftop to find it empty.
Huh. Maybe he went for a swing. You thought looking over the city.
He’d been told a couple times not to but that only made him do it more.
“He’s not here.” you heard behind you. Well shit.
“Thanks Jess.” you heard making you chuckle to yourself.
Of course.
“Well then it makes no use to stay up here.” you said turning to walk away.
“Wait, just give me a second.” he said, reaching out for you.
“One. Welp there is it and look I've given you five extra just by standing here.” you said sarcastically.
Trying to leave once more he actually Physically got in your way this time.
“Please.” he said trying to get you to look at him and you could've sworn you heard sincerity in there.
“Fine. talk.” you said crossing you arms sitting on the ledge trying to create some distance.
“ I   am sorry,” he blurted out.
“ I   don't forgive you. We done here? Great.” you said standing up ready to bee line it for the door.
Your tactics were failing you and your front could only last for so long.
“No no wait just-” he was cut off  by a beeping sound coming from your suit.
It was your alarm for Milo’s dinner time.
Gasping you stood up from where you sat.
“Oh Milo.” you said turning off the alarm.
“What? Who the fuck is Milo?” he said anger began to rise up in his chest.
“Really wish we could finish this but  I‘m late to a very important dinner with someone who does respect me, so excuse me.” you said finally getting past him.
Stunned  by your response he watched you walk past him.
Who in the actual fuck was Milo and what rights did he have over you?
Following you back into the party he watched as you asked Pete to get you back home.
“Oh yeah sure, How's Milo by the way?” he asked while opening the portal.
Again with this fucking Milo.
“Oh he's really great, miss him more every second we're apart.” you said, putting your hands on your hips.
Time was moving real slow right about now.
But for Miguel it was moving a little too fast, he didn't want you to get back to Milo. 
He wanted you here, patching things up with him.
“Gotta love Milo am  I   right? May Day sure does.” he said, quickly shutting up when he realized Miguel was still there.
“Well thanks for the portal, tell Mj the party was great, take care pete.” you said hugging him goodbye.
Just as you are about to be free Miguel grabs your hand.
“Will you come back, Please?” he asked, the desperation in his voice could be heard from miles away.
“ I   don't think so Miguel,  it took me a while to realize that there was nothing wrong with me. And Milo helped with that even if it's just been a couple of months and  I‘m still getting the hang of things. He loves me for it and he needs me.” you said, smiling at the thought of your sweet little furbaby.
Standing up straight Miguel let your arm go, “Lucky Milo.” was all he said before you took it as your queue to leave.
Defeated by the night's outcome he went back into his office and let out some frustration on the nearest machine.
There it was again, feeling sick of jealousy.
Someone else had your attention, time and love.
And all he had was your rejection.
At this point in time Miguel wished he was anybody else other than himself.
And just like that jealousy started following him wherever he went, never letting him go.
All because of some Milo.
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revasserium · 4 months
Note
hiii i'm a new follower and i love your writing so much
ik u said no requests in ur bio but i just finished reading ur sanji fic.. so even if ur still not taking requests i'd just like to throw in an idea that u may or may not feel like using in the future, up to you (i'm requesting this with opla sanji in mind but if u wanna use it for zoro that's cool too)
k so imagine reader being invited to a friend's wedding, & being excited to go until they find out their ex is coming too (with their partner of some amt of yrs). so now reader is pressured to bring someone w/ them & ends up asking their best friend sanji bc they don't want others thinking they're still hung up on the past.
wedding dress
opla!sanji; 6,544 words, pining with a happy ending, fluff and a tad of angst, flirting, lovesick!sanji, whipped!!!!sanji, no "y/n", zeff is a whole mood, confessions, sanji-appropriate nickname usage, modern!au?
summary: you invite sanji to be your plus 1 at a wedding
a/n: im so sorry this took so long. but. better late than? never? also, there is a tiny bit of rehashing for ep 6 of the live action for sanji and zeff's relationship so... spoilers?
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It’s a chilly, overcast kind of day when the call comes in. And in retrospect, Sanji thinks he should’ve known better when he’d seen your name on the caller ID. He’d hesitated, because by god if it wasn’t his New Year's Resolution to get the hell over you this year, but it’s almost December again and he still can’t help the way his heart races at the sound of your voice.
“Hey sweetheart — long time no talk!” he answers after a brief moment of contemplating his entire life, dusting his flour-covered hands on his apron.
“Hey! Sorry for calling so… out of the blue…” your voice is still as sweet as ever, and the way his stomach twists at the tinkle of your nervous laughter makes him want to kick himself. Still, he forces himself to stay calm, clearing his throat as he checks the oven — it’s almost done pre-heating.
“Now you know what I said about actin’ a stranger — just because you moved halfway across the entire world doesn’t mean we ain’t best friends anymore, right?”
It’s what you’d said when he’d been standing at the airport, three seconds from dropping to his knees and begging you not to go. But he hadn’t, because he knew how hard you’d worked for this — for this opportunity abroad, to study art in the birthplace of the Renaissance itself, in the heart of Italy.
“And… you might be able to come visit me, right?” you’d said, rocking on the balls of your feet, your eyes full of what Sanji could only call false hope — which is always, always the worst and most painful kind.
Sanji had swallowed and nodded and said something or other about Europe and fine dining, but there’s a terrible, prickling heat eating up the back of his neck and a voice that’s screaming at him to pull you to him and kiss you. He doesn’t. And he regrets it to this day.
“Ah — right… I’m actually calling because… I’ll be in the area in about a week and…”
Your voice pulls him out of his reverie and he clears his throat, hitches a smile to his face that he knows you can’t see but he’s sure you can hear.
“Oh! That’s great, darling! You’ve gotta come for a drink, I’ll whip up all your favorites — we can make a night —”
“It’s actually for a wedding.”
There are a few moments in everyone’s lives when they learn the true meaning of a thing for the very first time — elation, pride, stomach-twisting guilt, and… fear. True fear, the kind of fear that shakes the muscle from your bones and sends them tingling, threatens to overwhelm you with numbness. Fear, that pushes adrenaline through you like a drug, forces the world into a terrifying, all-consuming focus.
Sanji feels the fear coursing through him, wild and contentious at your words.
A wedding.
Your wedding? Perhaps?
He can’t bear to think of it; he’s so terrified he can barely breathe.
Then comes the moment after, the wave of everything else that the fear had washed away — confusion, anger, guilt (always guilt, for some reason), because isn’t he supposed to be happy for you? For you, the person he loves most in this entire world, to find love, to know happiness. He should. He should.
“Oh.”
Sanji sags back against the hard, metal counter. Almost mindlessly, he reaches into his pockets with shaking hands, digging around for a smoke.
Your breath is soft in his ear, too far across the phone line and a thousand miles of ocean.
“I originally wasn’t even planning on going — she’s not a very close friend — we had like one class together but —”
And within the span of a minute, Sanji also learns relief. The kind that melts the world around you into sizzling butter and champagne bubbles. The kind that makes you want to lie down on the ground and scream.
“— it was so close to your restaurant so I said yes but I didn’t know he was gonna be there and —”
You’re still talking, rambling like you do. And it takes nearly everything inside Sanji to pull himself back to the conversation.
“Sorry, love, who did you say was gonna be there?”
“My ex — you know the one —”
Sanji grimaces, flicking on his lighter with still-shaking fingers.
“Mm, yeah I do. The tall, dark-haired bastard who —”
“Yeah well — he’s gonna be there too and I just —” he hears you swallow hard and take a long, steadying breath. An unnameable something is calcifying in the depths of his stomach as he waits for you to collect yourself.
Curiosity? Why had you called like this, so suddenly, about a wedding where your ex was going to be? Concern? Were you thinking of going back to him?
But slowly, as you stutter through your next few words, the unnameable thing obtains a name — dread.
“— I just don’t think I could do it myself, y’know? And — and you were the one who got me out of it wh-when I decided to break it off with him so…”
Sanji takes a long drag of his cigarette and casts his eyes up at the high, white-slabbed ceiling of the kitchen, scored with long strips of bright, fluorescent lighting that floods the entire room in a direct, unforgiving glow.
He closes his eyes and counts to three.
“Course I’ll come with you, darlin’. It —” he wets his lips, taps off a bit of ash from his cigarette, and sucks in through his nose, clearing his throat of the words still lodged there, “— it’d be my honor.”
Relief — he hears it in your voice, and by gods he can almost see it — the way your whole face would light up, washed as if by the setting sun, your eyes wide and dark, your cheeks flushing his favorite fucking shade of pink and —
“Thank you, thank you, thank you! I really owe you for this one —”
Sanji makes a valiant effort at a nonchalant chuckle; it comes out sounding like a dog with a bit of bone stuck in its throat instead.
“Nonsense — what are best friends for, anyway?”
There’s a tiny pause where Sanji can feel the words best friend scraping along the insides of his mouth, barbed and harsh, leaving his tongue feeling raw and metallic.
“You really are the best friend anyone could ask for,” your voice is soft and honest and Sanji wants nothing more than to chuck his phone into the industrial blender.
You tell him that you’ll send him the details, that you can’t wait to see him soon, that you’ve got a world and a half of catching up to do, that you’ll buy him so, so many drinks, and that you’ll come bearing presents. He laughs at the right times, makes soft noises of consent and agreement, and when finally, finally you tell him goodbye, he clicks off the phone and takes another long drag of his smoke.
And then, he whips his hand back and throws the cigarette butt into the large sink, where it tinks against the metal and sizzles sadly in the murky dishwater.
“Real sucker for punishment, aren’tcha, lil’ eggplant?”
Sanji groans, turning around to find Zeff with his arms folded, the hip to his bad leg propped against a counter.
“Will you fuck kindly off — can’t you see I’m going through a thing here?”
Zeff snorts, clunking unevenly towards him.
“You been going through that thing for the last year and a half since you chickened outta askin’ her to stay so —”
“I didn’t chicken out — I — it was her dream to go to Florence and study —”
“And what was your dream then, ey?”
Sanji bangs his palm against the counter and sighs, “It’s not like I could leave you here with —”
“With what? A thriving restaurant business that I started? A guest list out the door and round the corner —”
“I — I helped!”
Zeff rolls his eyes, “Ah sure ya did, but I never asked you to, did I?”
Sanji huffs, pressing his tongue to the roof of his mouth to stop the torrent of horrible, sad, acrid things he could say and could never mean, so he swallows them back down. When he looks up next, Zeff is still standing there, but there’s a softness around his eyes.
He opens his mouth a few times, but eventually, all he says is, “The oven’s over heatin’.”
Sanji swears and jumps up to tug open the oven door. A wave of hot air whooshes out and nearly catches him in the face. Behind him, he can hear Zeff’s dark, gravelly chuckle, and the dull clunk of his wooden leg.
“You burn the kitchen down, you pay for it.”
And then he’s gone again, leaving the door swinging behind him, and Sanji very much alone with the too-hot oven and a counter full of things he can’t really remember the recipes for anymore.
Nearly a week later, Sanji finds himself standing at the airport, rocking on the balls of his feet, nearly in the exact same place as he’d been a year and a half prior. Except this time, you’re not walking away from him. You’re walking back towards him. He wonders if there’s a name for deja-vu in reverse and comes to the realization that that’s just called… a memory.
And memory seems to work in strange ways now, images superimposing themselves on top of one another — the flicker of a film lens, the bat of an eyelash, the shadow of a smile crimping the corner of your lips. All of this, he sees in the here and now, but he sees it in the air around you too, shimmering and mirage-like — all his memories and dreams of you layered over the shape of you. Your memory like a ghost of itself, trailing behind you as you walk towards him, a shy smile on your face, your cheeks flushed from travel and the cold and —
He doesn’t let himself hope. Not this time.
“Hey!” your voice is just as bell-like as he remembers it, pitched a little higher than it usually is, probably out of nervousness. But it still feels like a kick to the guts. Sanji forces himself to smile.
“Hi, love,” he says, leaning down as you reach him, but the motion aborts halfway because — is it still appropriate to hug you like he’d always done? To press his lips to your cheek or your hairline and revel in the bright citrus of your shampoo, to soak in the butter and cream of your skin like he used to?
There’s an awkward half-second pause before you’re standing up on tip-toe and Sanji’s heart nearly drops out of his ass as you lean in. But then — your lips skim by his cheek and your arms are around him, and stupid, stupid, stupid heart — thundering in his chest like horses or hooves or fists or thumping rabbit’s feet — leaping into his throat and pattering against the base of his tongue as he wraps his arms around you and holds you close. But it’s not close enough. It’s never close enough.
He breathes and distantly, a part of him notes that you still use the same shampoo.
“Hi…” your voice is warm by his ear, a bit muffled, but he can’t help the way it makes him shiver, “It’s… so good to see you.”
He nods, not trusting his own voice to do the normal thing and, oh, you know — work.
“I’ve — I’ve missed you.”
He makes a noise somewhere between a laugh and a cough as he nods again. He feels your arms slackening around him and a fierce, terrifying thing is flapping its wings in his stomach, screeching at him not to let you go. But he does — like he did before.
“I — I missed you too,” he says, though his voice sounds flat and scratchy and he clears his throat again.
A dozen different expressions flicker across the lovely planes of your face and finally, it settles on endeared exasperation.
“Please don’t tell me you still work through like three packs of smokes a day.”
Sanji laughs then, shaking his head as he reaches over for your luggage, “Nah — well, maybe not three but —”
You whack him softly on the arm.
“I actually tried to quit right after you left.”
“You did?”
Sanji shrugs as the pair of you start to make for the exit. He feels your gaze go slanted and shrewd.
“How long’d that last?”
He smirks, “Few hours.”
You whack him again and this time, he dodges out of the way just to bask in the bright spark of your laughter as you chase after him.
“Seriously though, you know how terrible they are for you!”
“Sure do,” he says, tugging one out of his pocket as soon as he clears the airport doors, pivoting left towards the parking garage. You have to jog to keep up with his longer strides, your breaths misting the air between you in silvery puffs.
He makes no move to light it as he helps toss your luggage into the trunk of his car, sliding into the driver’s seat. You huff as you wiggle into the passenger’s side.
“Then why —”
Sanji waits patiently for you to buckle your seatbelt before pulling out of the parking space, one hand on the steering wheel, the other resting soft against the middle console. He slates you a glance.
“Cause,” he says, fixing his eyes back on the road, an easy smirk twisting his lips, “it’s a metaphor.”
You groan, sinking into the seat, “Just because you read John Green one time —”
“Oi, I’ll have you know I read his entire bibliography after you showed him to me.”
“Ugh, whatever you manic-pixie-dreamgirl-loving ass.”
“Yeah, whatever — you actual manic pixie dreamgirl.”
You smile and Sanji allows himself the brief and aching delusion that the past year and a half didn’t happen, that you never left, and that you’d never leave. That you’d always be here, warm and laughing and just within reach.
The rest of the car ride is spent in mundane conversation, in how was your flight and tell me about Florence and how’s Zeff doing these days and I wanna know about your latest dish. It’s light and easy, and Sanji lets it warm the air around him. By the time he pulls into the front of your hotel, all the unsaid words from the past year and a half have soaked through his socks and into his shoes. It sloshes out onto the pale pavement as he opens the car door.
He helps you roll your luggage up into the lobby and tells you he’ll be here at 3PM to pick you up tomorrow. The venue’s just three blocks away.
“Yeah, I’ll see you then,” you say, pursing your lips, waving as he backpedals towards the automatic doors.
“You’ve still gotta send me pictures of the dress you’re wearing — I gotta find a matching tie.”
You laugh, a bit embarrassed, “Right — and here I thought I might surprise you.”
Sanji freezes, eyes wide.
“O-oh! Er — well, you can just — just tell me what color or —” he waves vaguely, “send a picture of a corner of the dress — just so I have something to color match against —”
You nod, eyes glittering, eager once more, “Oh! That’s a good idea — I’ll do that.”
“Great,” Sanji says.
“Great!” you echo, perhaps a bit too chipper.
He gives you one last smile before turning and striding from the hotel, firing up the engine as calmly as he can, forcing himself not to turn and check if you’re still watching him through the brightly lit, sliding glass doors. He allows himself a glance through the rear-view mirror as he pulls away from the drive and his heart skips a beat when he realizes you’re still standing there, right in the middle of the lobby, fingers wrapped around the handle of your suitcase, your eyes fixed on the shadow of his retreating car.
He lights the smoke the second he turns the corner, your shadow no longer in his rear-view mirror.
That night, Sanji dreams in fits and leaps, flashing images and long, sticky streams of could-have-beens —
He dreams of your laughter in a white-tiled kitchen, of powdered sugar and eggshells cracked and leaking on an exposed wood counter, chopsticks clinking against a thick glass mixing bowl. He dreams of your voice echoing off the shower tiles as you sing off-key, the way you used to when you’d sneak into his college dorm for movie night and a midnight snack. He dreams of coffee mugs and errant rose petals and dandelion seeds blowing in the wind. He dreams of dancing with you in his arms in a darkened dorm room that morphs into a bigger room with a softer carpet, one that he’d never seen before but he knows implicitly (like bodies know) is his home — it has pictures on the walls, trinkets lining the far bookshelf, your favorite scarf draped over the back of the well-worn sofa.
In the dream, you pull your head back from where it's pillowed against his shoulder and smile up at him. He leans down to kiss you, his lips hovering half an inch from yours.
Sanji jerks awake to the sound of his alarm, fingers fumbling for his phone, groaning as he smashes the orange snooze button and flips over to bury his face back into his lumpy pillow.
“Ah… fuck.”
It’s not the first time he’s had that dream, and he knows it won’t be the last. But it’d been so real that night, real enough to make him wonder if it just might come true.
He rubs at his sleep-crusted eyes and peers blearily at all the notifications on his screen. There’s a text from you with a picture attached. He clicks it open to find a short message attached to the picture — I really did want to surprise you…
He blinks for three seconds at what looks like a blurry picture of studded black silk before he remembers —
“Send me a picture of a corner of the dress — just so I have something to color match against.”
He allows himself a laugh, swinging his feet out of bed even as he types back — you coulda just told me it was black…
He watches the three little dots appear and disappear a few times, chewing on his bottom lip, before the text appears — well there are different shades of black, right???
Sanji laughs, shaking his head.
sure there are.
A string of tongue-out emojis, followed by an equally long string of middle-finger emojis.
He spends the rest of the morning fussing over which specific black tie to wear before settling on one that he’s quite sure is the exact same shade of black as your dress (and yes, he does have quite the collection of black ties), before tugging his best suit out to press.
It shouldn’t feel so easy, slipping back into the rhythm of things, of texting and smiling and hearing your voice in his head when he reads your texts. It shouldn’t feel so easy to forget the months of radio silence and guilt, the oppressive, resonant weight of what might have been if either of you had done a single thing different that day at the airport — he wonders if he should’ve reached for your hand, he wonders if you’d ever looked back.
He hadn’t. He couldn’t let himself.
He is waiting for you in the lobby at 2:45, wearing a hole into the plush Persian carpet, collecting strained looks from the concierge who had assured him three times in the last four minutes that he’d already rung up to your room and that you’d said you were on your way.
“Wow, you’re early — sorry I took a while — I couldn’t figure out what to do with my hair and —“
Sanji lifts his head and thinks distantly that all those rom-com cliches of a guy looking up, time itself slackening, the room smearing sideways around him, the music going slow, the lighting soft — all of it is painfully, startlingly true after all.
Because there you are, walking towards him, still saying something, but he can’t make out the words anymore because time isn’t really a thing anymore, is it? He can’t focus on that and also the dark glimmer of your dress, the way the neckline skates just beneath your collarbones, barely skimming the skin there before it slips down along the slope of your shoulders in a way that makes his breath unspool inside his chest like loose threads.
And in the slanted, ethereal light of the winter afternoon, your dress looks like it’s cut from a swath of darkest midnight, moonless and scattered with stars.
You blush as Sanji attempts to pick his jaw up off the floor and hitch his lips into something resembling a smile.
“W-wow… you look…”
Your smile is shy as you press your palms against the dress, looking down, “Thanks… you don’t think it’s… too much?”
Sanji shakes his head, feeling dazed.
“No! I mean — it’s —“ his mouth is dry, drier than he ever remembers it being, and suddenly it’s very hard to swallow and Sanji isn’t even sure the muscles in his neck know how to perform the action, let alone force words out alongside it. He struggles for another few seconds, his jaw working furiously as his eyes skitter down and back up the shape of you.
“You look… perfect,” he says, finally, because the word has been ricocheting around his chest like a stray bullet and he had to let it out somehow.
“Thanks — you don’t look so bad yourself,” you say, your voice breathy in a way that makes Sanji’s stomach squeeze.
He offers you his arm, and you glide forward to take it.
He drives the three blocks to the wedding venue in a daze, his mind spinning slow and off-axis, tilted so by the gentle waft of your perfume, the lullaby of your voice as you chatter nervously about this and that and the weather, I mean, can you believe it’s gonna be an outdoor wedding in the winter? He wonders briefly why you’re so nervous, and then he’s reminded of the reason he’s even here at all — your ex will be here. Ah. Right.
“Ready?” he asks, offering you his arm again as the both of you follow the meandering stream of arriving guests toward the paved outdoor garden area where the ceremony is due to take place.
“No, but… you’re here so…” you let out a breath and for a second, Sanji almost thinks he hears the hint of an ache in your voice. An ache like an old scab picked at too many times, like unrequited love, perhaps. It’s an ache with which Sanji is so intimately familiar that he immediately tamps it down and vows not to think about it again for the rest of the night.
There are stiff-backed waiters wandering around with plates of hors d’oeuvres and thin flutes of bubbling pink champagne.
Sanji grabs two glasses and hands you one.
“Cheers, then.”
“Bottoms up,” you say, tossing back the entire flute in one.
Sanji cocks his eyebrows, grinning as he follows suit, smacking his lips.
“Alright then, I guess if that’s how you’re playin’ —”
Your laughter is light, if a little strained, but he remembers how quickly bubbly drinks tend to go to your head and makes a concerted effort to slow down. You make it all the way through the actual ceremony without bumping into your ex, though you do lean over and grab Sanji’s hand as the bride and groom exchange vows — something about love being a choice, one that they promise to make every morning of every day for the rest of their lives — and he looks over to find you misty-eyed, bottom lip caught beneath your teeth.
“Sap,” he whispers, leaning over. It earns him a choked laugh and a half-hearted elbow in the ribs, but it’s worth it to see the tension melt from your shoulders.
Sanji turns back towards the bride and groom, exchanging rings now, and unbidden comes the images of you and him standing where they are — you in a dazzling white gown, him still in a dark suit, but one perhaps of more expensive material and much better tailoring. He thinks about all the things he might promise you, wonders at what you might promise him in return —
“I promise to love and cherish you —” you might say.
“I promise to make all your favorite foods,” he might say.
“I promise not to touch your emotional support le creuset pans.”
“I promise not to make you taste all my experimental dishes —”
“Okay, but what if I want to —”
He imagines the way the crowd would titter, how the officiator would affectionately clear his throat. He imagines Zeff’s warm, well-worn laughter, rough and a little torn at the edges because he’s just as sentimental as the next guy behind all the beard and gruffness. He imagines the crowd smiling up at the pair of you, the way you’d squeeze his hands to get the both of you back on track —
He jerks out of his reverie as you tug your hand away from his to clap, and it takes him a beat to realize that everyone else is clapping and cheering too. He blinks — the bride and groom are kissing, pulling apart as the music swells around them and they link hands to walk back down the aisle.
Sanji clears his throat and hurriedly gets up to clap as well, his eyes trailing the radiant smiles on both the newlyweds’ faces. Another sharp ache sings through him but he feels your hand in his again and he can’t tell if he wants to grip you tighter or pull away. They’d both hurt just as much, wouldn’t they?
“C’mon, let’s get inside — I wanna judge the catering with you,” you whisper, your breath tickling his cheek, and he knows without having to look that you’re standing on your tiptoes, your chin almost propped on his shoulder.
He fights down a bout of shivers and smiles, “My favorite part of any formal event, honestly.”
You laugh, “I know — me too.”
So you spend the entire dinner service whispering to each other about the food —
“God, this steak is so well done I think it just might dislocate my jaw —”
“What’s in this sauce?”
Sanji chews thoughtfully before making a face, “Dunno, but it’s got oregano.”
“Oh the cake looks good though.”
“Yeah, but we both know how much sugar and butter goes into that right?”
You nudge him with an elbow, “Weird, cause I’m pretty sure happiness is also made of sugar and butter.”
“Well for me, it’s always been…” but Sanji trails off, biting his tongue. No. He can’t say that — not now. Not here.
Because for him, happiness has always just been you.
So instead, he swallows passed his own mouthful of regrets and attempts a lopsided grin. And thankfully, your attention is drawn elsewhere by a loud peal of laughter before he has to make a shitty joke about happiness being a well-lit kitchen and a gas-lit stove.
You’re both at least a bottle of champagne deep when it finally happens, inevitable as a summer storm — your ex saunters up to you on the dance floor, sporting a grease-slick grin, eyeing you up and down like a piece of well-cut meat. Sanji is at the bar, grabbing more drinks and you’re catching a breath of fresh air just outside the dance hall.
“Well, well, well — look who it is.”
Sanji turns sharply at the sound of the voice, his eyes narrowing — Asshat. Fantastic. The bartender is putting the finishing touches on two custom cocktails but blinks, confused, as Sanji swipes both drinks out from the bar and casts him a hurried grin.
“Thanks mate, these look great,” Sanji raises the cocktail glasses at the bewildered bartender before hurrying off, slowing ever so slightly as he reaches you, straightening his spine and smoothing out his shoulders.
“Here, got them special-made for you,” he says, pressing the cocktail into your hand, cutting into something that Asshat is saying.
“Oh! Thanks — oh wow, this looks so good!” you beam up at him, taking a sip.
“Oh wow, didn’t know you were still hangin’ out with this guy,” Asshat says, hooking his thumbs into his belt-hoops and jutting out his chin.
You frown, pressing your lips, “Excuse me?”
Asshat scoffs, posturing, “I mean, when we broke up, it was cause o’him right? So I just thought you might’ve realized what a mistake that was and —”
Sanji barely has the time to feel offended before Asshat is gasping and stumbling back. You’d tossed the remainder of your drink straight into his face.
“What the —” Asshat sputters, his fists clenching, but quick as anything, Sanji swipes out a leg that catches him right in the shins and makes him stumble. In one fluid movement, Sanji pushes his own drink into your hand before reaching out the other arm to steady the now flailing Asshat, catching him around the shoulders.
“Whoa there! Seems like you’ve had a bit too much to drink, my friend!” he says, loud enough for the people around you to hear. He thumps Asshat on the back in a would-be kind gesture before tugging him close, still coughing, and hissing in his ear —
“Listen here, you asswipe — you’re gonna turn around and walk away and stay the fuck away from us for the rest of this wedding, you understand? I’ve got plenty more o’this for ya if you don’t, got it?”
Sanji scuffs his foot along the gravel-covered ground in a motion that could easily be mistaken as fidgeting, but you know better. And so, it seems, does Asshat, who scoffs and shoves Sanji off him with a glare, but after another second, straightens his drink-soaked jacket, turns, and stalks away.
You let out a long breath, swallowing hard.
“Hey darlin’… you alright?” Sanji turns and bends down to level his eyes with yours.
“Y-yeah — thanks — you didn’t need to —”
“Nah. Course I did — it’s why you invited me, right?” he allows himself a lopsided grin that borders on self-deprecating and you look up, eyes wide.
“No! I — that’s not —”
“It’s okay, love — I promise I’m not offended —” Sanji’s babbling, he knows he is — but he has to, because the alternative of letting you speak, of letting you confirm what he already knows to be true (that you’ve only ever seen him as a best friend, that you love him in all the ways except for the one way he wants you to, in the one way he loves you) is too much. He tucks his hands in his pockets and shrugs up his shoulders, pulling them up towards his ears like armor.
And then you lean in and kiss him, and every single word he’s ever thought of saying just to fill the silence turns to mist and mornings on his tongue. His mind turns blissfully blank and when he regains consciousness (or has he? Because isn’t this the dream he’s dreamt every waking moment of his life for the past… however many years?), he thanks every god he can name that he feels his fingers in your hair, his other hand cupping the soft curve of your jaw. He tastes your uncertainty against his lips and presses in, hoping, praying that if he just kissed you hard enough you might understand.
When you pull away, he can’t help the satisfied purr that curls up his chest at the pinkness in your cheeks and the slightly glazed-over look in your eyes.
“O-oh — sorry I —”
Sanji shakes his head, leaning in to push his forehead against yours.
“Nah, nah, nah — if you tell me that was a mistake now I might just turn around and never speak to you ever again — because don’t you dare —”
You let out a helpless laugh, shaking your head as you reach up to cover his hands with yours. It’s only then that he realizes they’d been shaking. He swallows and he thinks he can taste every single morning after for the rest of his goddamn life in the whisper of your breath.
“It — it’s not, I wasn’t —” you close your eyes and Sanji holds you still, foreheads still pressed. Distantly, Sanji is aware that people are cheering, that more drinks are being poured, that the dance floor is probably a mess. But he doesn’t care. He doesn’t think he’ll care about anything else ever again — why would he? Now that he’s got you.
“Shh… take your time, love… we’ve got all the time in the world.”
He feels the relief take you, and then you’re falling into him, burying your face in the lapel of his suit jacket, probably smearing it with your foundation. Vaguely, Sanji considers framing it when he gets home.
“I’m… I’m sorry it took so long — I’m sorry I didn’t — that I wasn’t…” you curl your fist into the material of his shirt and thump him lightly on the chest, even as he laughs and wraps his arms around you.
“I know, darlin’… I know.” Sanji presses his lips into your hair and can’t help a smile.
Finally. Finally.
Your hair smells like citrus shampoo.
Finally.
“I thought about you every single day,” you admit, your voice small when you finally pull back to look at him again. He thinks there might be tears in your eyes, or maybe it’s just the starlight caught in the thick night sky of your lashes.
“Did you now?” he asks, fumbling for some semblance of normalcy amidst this night of revelations.
You nod, fervently, and god he wants to kiss you again. Briefly, he wonders if he should, if he’s allowed to now. Instead, he smiles and cocks his head.
“So? What changed?” and he can’t help the tiny note of hurt out of his voice, the slightest shiver of disbelief. After all, cynicism is a hard habit to break.
Especially after so many years of practice.
You shrug, sighing, “Nothing — everything. I mean — I’d always… but then I thought — you had your career as a chef and I didn’t even know what I wanted to do with my life. But it —” you lick your lips, and Sanji nearly breaks when you tear your eyes away from his. He wants to force you back, to soak in the dark and bright of your gaze till he can see the world exactly as you see it.
“It’s always been you…” you say.
At this, Sanji does break. He tips your face towards him with a thumb and a forefinger and leans in, waiting for you to pull back, bracing for it. But you don’t — instead, you press in and close the space between you again, and again, and then again.
He wants to tell you — he needs to tell you that it’s always been you too, that there’s never been anyone else. From the moment he first laid eyes on you, he’s known, even though both of you were children back then, and neither of you had any idea what “love” actually meant. He knew then, too.
“Love…” his voice trails off, but you smile, and he knows you know, knows that you can hear it in the rawness behind his voice, in the softness of his breath, in the way it shakes.
You make to kiss him again. But your lips hover half an inch from his and you stop. Sanji sighs.
“What — why’d you stop?”
Your smile is sweet and sharp, honey glinting on a razor’s edge, and he knows that he has you. And maybe that he’s always had you and was just too blind, too terrified, to see it.
“Haven’t you heard? It’s a metaphor.”
Sanji groans, “Fuck your metaphors.”
You bat your lashes, pulling an expression of mock affront onto your face.
“Well at least wine me and dine me first —”
Sanji licks his lips, “What’dyou think I’ve been trying to do for the last ten years?”
Your breath catches.
“Oh.”
Sanji smirks and kisses you again, slowly this time, languid and deep. Unhurried. He luxuriates in the way you go soft in his arms, in the way he can feel the gentle hitch of your breath as he runs his tongue along the edges of your teeth, coaxing you towards him, closer and closer and closer.
The hardest, angriest part of him wants to swallow you whole, bite down just to hear you hiss, to taste your blood on his tongue. To make you feel even a sliver of the pain he’d felt. He tamps it back down — there’s time for that later.
Instead, he forces himself to pull back and allows himself the satisfaction of watching you chase him, pursing your own lips with a bashful look away, your cheeks dark.
“So,” Sanji takes half a step back, puffing out his chest in the best imitation of a fuckboy at a wedding party, “wanna get outta here?”
You let out a helpless laugh, falling into his side. He lets the sound ring through him like so many silver bells.
“Yeah, I’d love that.”
He chuckles, looping an arm around your middle and leaning towards your ear.
“Your place, or mine?”
You roll your eyes, “I’m pretty sure I still have a toothbrush at your place.”
Sanji hums, “You still have a whole drawer at my place.”
You smile up at him, open and happy and sincere, “Then… I guess that’s your answer then.”
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bunnyreaper · 8 months
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𝖈𝖔𝖑𝖑𝖆𝖗𝖘 𝖆𝖓𝖉 𝖈𝖆𝖌𝖊𝖘 𝔞 𝔰𝔬𝔞𝔭 𝔪𝔞𝔠𝔱𝔞𝔳𝔦𝔰𝔥 𝔵 𝔯𝔢𝔞𝔡𝔢𝔯 𝔰𝔢𝔯𝔦𝔢𝔰 𝖕𝖙 1 — 𝖕𝖙 2 𝖍𝖊𝖗𝖊 wc - 5.7k warnings - 18+/nsfw, dom sub dynamic, eventual romance/smut, medium burn? notes - first part of my owner!soap x pet!reader, woohoo! i already regret writing something centered around texting and calling lmao, crying!! the formatting is killing me!! anyway, also on ao3! and if you wanna send a request, pls do! ♥
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Lonely girl looking for owner. 
Posting on this subreddit again was probably a mistake—but a deep-down part of you clings to the hope that this time will be the time you find someone, the time you get to go home to him. 
At least this time, you'll be better at spotting the signs right off the bat—if only you can take off the rose-tinted glasses long enough to take note.
Your inbox is flooded with the usual kinds of messages—unsolicited pictures, low-effort one-sentence wonders, and so-called doms jumping straight to the part where they call you a nasty whore with no actual consideration for the person you are. 
You're just about to give up, delete the post, and ignore all chat requests when a message arrives in your inbox. 
From: squeakycleanscot 
Subject: Lonely guy looking for girl
Hi,
Saw your post and knew I had to message. You sound like everything I'm looking for and more.
I'm a little younger than the age you put on your post, but I think I fit your other requirements. I'm 27, Scottish (yes, with the accent), and in the army, I hope that's a turn-on rather than a turn-off.
When I'm not deployed, I like cosy nights in, preferably with my love by my side. Don't mind a night at the pub either, especially if there's a Celtic match on, not that anywhere near here shows them. 
I'm looking for something longer term like you mentioned (would love to collar my girl one day, which is probably ironic considering I'm a wee bit scared of dogs.)
Happy to send a picture if you'd like :) 
Hope to hear from you soon, 
Johnny.
Johnny. 
You reread the message, turning his words over in your mind. 
Something about his message has your attention—it at least suggests he has a brain in his head and a heart capable of empathy, and that maybe he's serious. 
You begin typing your reply instantly, your fingers moving so fast you have to type and retype so many parts to rid the message of all of the overexcited mistakes.
hi johnny, 
scottish?! is it bad im already imagining how your dirty talk will sound? 
it's funny, i always wanted to join the army growing up, but it never worked out. maybe it's for the best as now i'm not immune to enjoying a hot man in uniform... which I'm assuming you are ;) 
cosy nights in are my favourite too! I'm a bit of a homebody and love being snuggled up more than anything. i have to let you know in advance that you have some stiff competition in the form of my giant teddy bear, barnaby. 
i'm looking for something longer term too, or at least not a one night kind of thing—a collar one day would be the dream &lt;;3 
if you send a picture, ill send one back, nothing sexy just yet though, if that's okay? 
have you met up with someone off here before? just curious about your experiences! 
y/n
As soon as the message is sent, the overthinking kicks in—was that too much? Is he going to think you're weird? 
You shuffle in bed, turning over between the sheets and trying to flick through other apps as you wait for a reply—otherwise, you'd just be staring at the notifications bar waiting for that silly little robot face to pop up. 
Johnny doesn't leave you waiting long, only a few minutes passing from your last message.
Maybe you'll find out sooner rather than later just how my dirty talk sounds ;) 
I tried to sneak in before I was old enough, but they caught on. Served since I was 18 though, you'll have a lot of stories ready from me if you're ever willing to listen. Not sure if the uniform is anything like you're thinking though, in my unit it's mostly just t-shirts, tac vests and trousers. 
I'll prepare my best snuggling arms for if we ever meet. You should inform Barnaby now about his replacement, mind. 
Can't not send a sexy photo though, sorry lass, all my pictures are. I'm sure you understand, lol
Haven't met anyone, had a few conversations but nothing worth pursuing, and had kind of given up until I saw your post. 
His message is the perfect mix of sexy, sweet, and sincere—and if that is the essence of the man, you know he's everything you're looking for. 
You try not to think too hard about a hot Scottish accent calling you all your favourite names or telling you exactly what to do, or even those stories he has to tell, as the idea is all too exciting. 
Reading his message, you instinctively reach out to pat Barnaby when you see he may end up replaced—hopefully the poor bear will understand when he has to vacate the bed for this sexy soldier man. 
looking forward to it. can I start putting in requests now for bedtime stories too?
i still wanna see, maybe in your sexy-not-sexy pic? 
barnaby will be devastated by the news, and you may have to give him hugs too (but not for too long, or i'll get lonely!!!)
same here, about things not going anywhere... or people turning out to be a bit scary, so you're not allowed to let me down, okay? 
Maybe the last part of the message was too much, but your heart is already soaring with unbridled hope—along with that hope comes doubt too. 
Each second waiting for a reply drags, and you take to re-reading his messages and clicking on his profile to investigate. 
It's largely empty of posts, but there are tons of comments across different communities—including his aforementioned football team, r/Scotland, and eyebleach. 
Clearly, he's a softie at heart. 
When his next message comes through, it's an Imgur link with a short message. 
Here we go, a few months old though now. Don't have anything more recent from work :) 
You take a moment or two to steady yourself before you tap the link. While you definitely feel like you and Johnny have already started to click, if he's not your type then it probably won't go anywhere... 
It's a situation you've been in before—great conversation, similar interests but no physical attraction, and back then you didn't have the heart to break it off straight away.
You tap the link and are greeted by a full-body shot of a tall, well-built man in tactical clothes. His hair is a neatly trimmed mohawk, and while his face isn't crystal clear, he's clearly fucking handsome. His biceps bulge from the gray tee stretched over his torso, his large hands are covered with gloves and grasping a gun.
Your eyes trail to his long legs, thick thighs encased in camo and strapped with various holsters. All in all, the picture is perfect. You find yourself zooming in desperately to get a better look at his face, the handsome jaw lined with stubble that you can already imagine between your legs. The whole image and every new detail has you squirming in your bed, and cheekily wishing to save the image to your phone.
holyfwucj 
holy fuck 
Like what you see? 
i need a hug from you urgently. 
now i feel shy... 
It had crossed your mind ever so slightly that Johnny may be out of your league, or that he simply may not be attracted to someone like you, which would be a complete shame. Now you've set eyes on him, you want him even more—want to kneel at those feet and stare up at his hulking figure while he tugs on a leash around your neck. 
Hopefully, just like you, he'll be smitten from the first glance. 
Scrolling through your camera roll, you decide you don't exactly love any recent photos of yourself. The ones at your last work event have you looking far too corporate, and the only image from your last night out was taking in a bathroom mirror in the local Wetherspoons—neither of which is ideal. 
You crawl out from the warmth of your sheets, kneeling on the end of the bed and posing as you point your camera in the mirror that sits across the room and captures you perfectly. Before you start snapping, you adjust your top to make sure too much isn't on display, even though it's strappy and cropped, and definitely a little bit more on the tantalising side as far as your pyjamas go. 
Hopefully, Johnny likes the pose and the outfit... and you. You can see your smiling face just to the side of your phone as you press to capture the picture—and when you return to your inbox to send the picture link, a message is waiting for you. 
I already know you're gorgeous. Don't leave me hanging, bonnie. 
okay. this is me now, all ready for bed!! 
Holy fuck yourself.
And I'm assuming that's Barnaby in the background. 
If he notices the pose, he doesn't comment on it, instead delighting your heart by commenting on Barnaby instead.
sure is! he's ready for snuggles and sleep. 
Can you do me a favour? 
That message makes your heart skip because usually when something like that is asked, it's followed with a request for nudes or something sexual—and while that is a large part of something like this, you crave the connection first, crave someone actually sticking around and getting to know you. 
depends on what it is!
Tell Barnaby to keep looking after you until I get there, yeah? 
does that mean you're coming for me?
One day, if we're both lucky.
seems promising so far, Johnny. 
Get some sleep, yeah? Maybe tomorrow night I'll give you a bell. 
The idea of this conversation ending is heart-wrenching, but at least sleep will bring you closer to that possible phone call. Hearing his voice, now that will be even more incredible. 
how do you expect me to sleep after telling me that? so mean! 
Patience, bonnie. Be good for me? 
You clench, your thighs squeezing together as arousal rushes through you. It's like he knows exactly how far to go, what buttons to press, what you're looking for.
It's the right kind of commanding, toeing the line perfectly between flirtatious and in charge. A lot of guys you've talked to have rushed it made commands too early, and sent you running. Johnny's words, be good for me? You can't help but want to behave. 
okay, but I see how this is going to be :( 
Bet you look so fucking good with a pout ;) 
now you're just being a cruel tease, Johnny... 
Sorry, I'll stop. Sleep, yeah, for me?
cuddling up to barnaby now. 
You decide to attach another picture, your eyes screwed shut and cheeks squished as you wrap yourself around the bear and cuddle up under the sheets. 
talk tomorrow?
Of course, bonnie, sweet dreams &lt;;3 
You lock your phone, your eyes feeling relieved as they adjust to the darkness. 
For a brief moment, you just clutch your phone to your chest and recall the picture Johnny had sent, how much you'd love to be wrapped up in his arms tonight. 
He's the only thing on your mind as you drift off to sleep.
-//-
Your dreams are tumultuous, starting off with a nightmare of being chased and chased until your legs give out, only for you to find salvation and safety in a stranger's arms—one who seemed vaguely familiar. 
The first thing you do when you wake is roll over to check your phone, elation overtaking you when you see a notification from Johnny already waiting there—already he's blessing you with a good morning message.
Good morning, sweet girl.
Attached under the picture is another image link, and clicking on it brings up an absolutely gorgeous picture of Johnny, lazing in bed. There's just enough light in the room for you to see the brightness of his eyes that you couldn't see before—his mohawk is mussed, and his smile is easy, drawing you in. 
He's even more handsome in this up close photo, you can only imagine what he looks like in person, right before you. 
morning Johnny <3 how did you sleep? 
Like a baby. Yourself? 
not the best, but I swear you were in my dream. 
Sorry to hear that, but oh already? What did I do? 
I mean, it was a bulky guy with a mohawk but he didn't have your name, I think it was meant to be you though. 
You recall the safety you felt in the arms of the strange figure, it was serene, and everything you hope to feel when you find the one—hopefully that's Johnny.
My dreams were shite, you didn't show up. 
i'll try harder to be there tonight!! 
Promise? 
promise. 
God, he's so fucking sweet. It's hard to imagine he's into all the things you mentioned in your initial post, at least right now. But you're all too familiar with how appearances can be deceiving—you wonder what else your sweet Scot is into. 
You peel back the covers and head out into the kitchen, flicking the kettle on mindlessly as you keep your eyes fixated on the screen—not wanting to be even a minute late to answering Johnny's texts, even though it seems there's a natural lull in the conversation. 
You return your focus to making your tea, and your thoughts don't drift from Johnny for even a moment, as you ponder ways to keep the conversation going. Admittedly, you have a million and one questions you want, but you don't want to come across too... eager? clingy? Like some serial killer fiending for information? 
It's crazy the way your heart yearns for him so soon—and it's crazy the way that you wish he feels the same as you do. You wonder how his day is going, and if he's staring at your phone waiting for your message.
With tea brewed, you set it on the coffee table and flop onto the plush couch, rushing to open the app when a new notification pops up.
What's your plan for the day? 
lazy day, binge-watching... texting you? wbu? 
I have to work for a bit, but I'll message you when I can. 
On a weekend? That's horrible, but I imagine they run a tight ship over there. 
You rush to follow up your message with something else. 
will you still be able to call tonight? 
Aye, give me your number, I'll save it! 
You send off your number and don't hear anything from Johnny for a good few hours. You pass the time watching one of your favourite shows, and trying to resist the urge to go scroll down Johnny's profile once more.  
The next time a message pops up, it's well past lunch.
Cute profile pic on whatsapp.
Johnny has clearly added your number to his contacts and spied your picture on the app. You blush thinking of him seeing you in that costume—especially after he knows what you're into.
it was Halloween, I swear!! 
You make an adorable little kitten, lass.
imagination running wild now? ;) 
Aye, but I'm a gent. 
hopefully not always...
Oh, you'll see. Talk to you tonight, kitty. 
talk to you then &lt;;3 
Now you're just itching, waiting for the hours to crawl by for Johnny's workday to end, so you can talk to him again, so you can finally hear his voice. 
What will it sound like saying your name? Whispering sweet nothings in your ears? 
The hours pass slowly until a different notification lights up your phone as you cuddle into your sheets.
Hey, it's Johnny! Just got home. 
You scramble to click on the pop-up, spying his own profile picture in the corner—tapping on it to view it closer. 
It's the Johnny you recognise, smiling wide with his arm slung around another man. He looks so ridiculously happy, probably due to the pint in his other hand. The more you look at him, the more you can't believe you're talking to this man, that he wants to talk to you. 
You quickly add him to your contacts, putting a heart next to his name, before you return to the chat and begin to type.
i'm not the only one with a cute pfp!! 
Three sheets to the wind in that picture, actually.
i can tell &lt;3
Ready to call? 
whenever you're ready!
The image of him floods your screen, the screen pulsing as it waits for you to accept. Your fingers tremble as you press the button, and you fall silent as you press the phone to your ear, nerves gripping at your throat. 
"Hi, bonnie." His voice drifts from the phone speaker, sweet like honey and warm like sunshine, with that gorgeous accent too. 
"Hi." You squeak out, silently cursing at yourself for being so nervous and seemingly unable to speak. 
A melodic laugh follows your words, amused but not cruel or mocking. "Are you nervous?" His voice is soothing, his concern and sweet nature evident. 
You cradle your burning cheek, feeling the way your blush spreads across your smiling face. "Just a little, can you blame me?" 
He's laughing again, and you hear a shuffling noise that suggests he's getting comfortable. "Don't be, I'll look after yer, I promise." 
Fuck. You could get used to hearing that. "I really like your voice." You admit, whispering into the phone with a ridiculous grin on your face. 
"I like yours too, you sound so sweet." 
You drop your voice lower, giggling mischievously. "Only sometimes." 
"That's what I like ta hear." The way Johnny's voice dips as he says that has your insides fluttering, but you can only assume he's returning the favour. His tone returns to its usual charming tone as he asks, "How was your lazy day?" 
"Well, I kind of spent a fair bit of it distracted, thinking about this important call I was going to have tonight..." 
"Oh aye, I should get off the phone so you can wait then." 
"Funny. How was yours? What do you even do day to day, anyway?" You ask, voice brimming with curiosity—there are so many things you want to ask, but you imagine his job can be secretive. 
"Lots of training, and sometimes paperwork, which is right shite." 
"Not when you don't have someone under the desk keeping you company." You laugh, taking the chance to flirt. If you were into Johnny after reading his messages, actually hearing his voice is only making your attraction soar. 
A quiet fuck can be heard, as the man on the end of the phone heaves out a breath. "I'll have ta look into getting you clearance if you keep talking like that, lass." 
"Glad to be of service, what can I say?" You find yourself in a giggle fit at your own silliness, a mix of nerves and joy at enjoying yourself so much.
"God, I love yer laugh." The deep sincerity in his voice makes your chest tighten. 
The drug that is Johnny is already so intoxicating. 
"I'm so glad you can't see me blushing." 
"I'm no'." He sounds so indignant about that. "But I could listen to that laugh all day, really."
If only he could see you pout too. "Now you're just trying to make me blush more." 
He chuckles, his voice dropping dangerously flirtatious again. "Maybe I am, nothing you can do about it."
"Now I'm pouting." 
"Better not pout in front of me, lass." His suggestive tone makes you shiver. 
"Oh, why's that?" You ask, playing coy. 
"'Cause I'll just have to start kissing ya, might even nibble on those soft little lips." 
You suppress a delighted squeak, already so flustered at even the idea of a kiss. "I'm not hearing a downside." 
"No?" 
"Nope." 
"Might not be gentle with you, though." 
"Good thing that I like it rough." The words are out of you before you can reconsider, but they have exactly the effect you intend as you hear Johnny inhale sharply.
"Ach, you and yer wicked mouth." 
"You have no idea..." 
He lets out a rough exhale, his voice turning gravelly and deep. "Fuck, bonnie." 
"Hey, I'm only repaying the favour, I've been squirming desperately pretty much since I picked up the phone." 
He whistles approvingly, his voice now teasing and playfully menacing. "Just you wait til I'm really in ya head." 
"You're already making good progress." You admit.
"Oh aye?" 
You hum contentedly, eyes flickering shut for a moment. "I'll be imagining your voice as I fall asleep tonight." 
"I'll just have ta send yer voice notes to drift off to, so I can end up in your dreams again." You can almost hear the smirk in his voice. 
"Already spoiling me, too." 
Fuck, how is it this man seems to know exactly what to say? Everything that comes out of his mouth takes root in your brain and sends your thoughts running wild—it's like he's already in your head, or as if someone made him in a lab.
"I'll spoil ya every day, if you're ever mine." 
You groan in frustration, unbelieving that a stranger can be so seemingly perfect. "How are you even single, Johnny?" 
"I could ask you the same. Taking everything in me to not ask for an address right now, if I'm being honest." He huffs a laugh. 
While the idea is thrilling, you know you should have at least some sense of preservation, and shouldn't blurt out your postcode for this strange man you barely know. "I'm worth the wait, I swear." You whisper your promise. 
"I'm sure yer are. But to answer your question, my work keeps me busy a lot, and this lifestyle isn't for everyone." There's a hint of vulnerability to his voice, and you sense such a fact is a sore point in his personal life. 
In the fantasy of all of this, you suppose the reality of the situation isn't something you'd stopped to consider. Life for a man in the military was surely so different from a regular 9-5. "I'm guessing that you're away a lot?" 
"Aye, sometimes for just a few days, sometimes for months, all depends." His admission is soft, as if you can hear in his tone that he's waiting for you to bolt. 
If that's the big 'catch' when it comes to Johnny, you can breathe a sigh of relief. "Yeah, I guess you need someone strong and loyal to hold on and wait for you." 
There's a tense silence, something lingering in the air. 
"Hard to come by, I've found." 
The thought makes your stomach twist in the worst possible way. Johnny, at least on the surface, seems so worthy of love. 
You chance the question that's on the tip of your tongue, hoping Johnny doesn't mind your reckless curiosity. "Have... you been cheated on?" 
"More than once, gets less surprising over the years." He finishes with a sad laugh, as you can tell he tries to infuse humour into the whole thing. 
"That's... horrible." 
Being sent away from your home to face gunfire and warfare, all to keep the people back home safe... only to be betrayed by the people back home who love you, who are supposed to wait for you. It's a gut-wrenching thought, and your heart aches for the man.
"A few of the lads here have a similar story." 
"So the army, not for the faint of heart, and dating an army man, not for the faint of heart." You sigh, though you don't feel put off by the thought.  
"Exactly. That you then? Faint of heart?" 
"No. I mean, inside I'm clingy as hell, and I'd miss you like crazy every day until you got back..." Your emotions overtake you, as you imagine a future where you'd have to kiss the man goodbye for maybe months at a time. "But I get the feeling that what we could have would be worth the wait. Hypothetically of course." 
At that, Johnny laughs, and his light tone returns. "Don't want to get too far ahead of ourselves, aye." 
You don't want to get ahead of yourself, you know you shouldn't, but the way you and Johnny have clicked is unlike anything you've felt before. "But... I have a good feeling." 
"I do too, already dreading putting down the phone." 
"I'm not planning on it anytime soon, even if I have to be up early tomorrow." 
"So do I, alarms set for 4." 
You do not envy his lifestyle one bit.
"That's awful! I'm gonna be so cranky tomorrow, I might have to use my lunch break for a nap." You admit, preemptively yawning into your hand. 
"You one of those perpetually sleepy girls?" 
You nod, even though he can't see it. "The sleepiest." 
"Barnaby is a lucky bear, getting to cuddle up to you so much." 
You burst out laughing at the hint of envy in his words. "Are you... jealous?"
"For now, but soon the tables will turn." He faked an evil laugh, that only makes you giggle harder. 
"Oh, you think you can give better snuggles than him?" 
"Oh, I know I can, bonnie. The bear can't wrap his arms around yer, can't whisper sweet things in your ear..." His voice dips back into that seductive, teasing tone. "... Can't trail his hands down to that pretty little pussy." 
Once more, you flush with desire, every nerve alight as Johnny's words wash over you—although it seems like almost everything he says has your body reacting. "You have an interesting way of cuddling, Johnny."
"Didnae say I was actually gonna do anything once my hands got down there." 
"Well, I wouldn't be opposed." 
"When you're in my arms, you wouldn't have a choice, lass." The dark, dominant voice makes you shiver, makes your submissive instincts awaken. 
"Oh yeah?" 
He hums slowly. "Once you're mine, you leave the choices to me. Johnny knows best, yeah?" 
"Johnny knows best." You whisper breathlessly, the words coming out automatically, like they just feel right.
"Steamin' Jesus, can already tell yer gonna be the death of me." 
"Can't have that, your family won't get your death in service payout!" You laugh awkwardly, before a sense of guilt rears its head. "Sorry, grim joke." 
"I don't mind. You should hear some of the ones my Lt. comes out with, he's a right sick bastard." He chuckles.
"Never want to make light of it and hurt you, though." 
"Telling jokes makes it easier hen, you'll be wishing me dead in no time at all."  
You gasp, shocked by the prospect. "I'd never!" 
"Not even when I deny you from touching yourself for my entire deployment? Months of nothing at all?" The sick grin is evident in his voice. 
"You wouldn't, that's so mean. You're too sweet for that." 
"Aye, for now, but don't you like a little bit of meanness, if yer into men like me..." The edge to his voice and the truth to your words has you trembling. 
"Maybe..." You singsong in response, not wanting to give away just how much you liked the idea of his mean side. 
"Bonnie..." He tuts disapprovingly. "Don't play coy." 
You shudder out a breath as you squeeze your thighs together for relief. "I just don't want you to bully me too much right now, I'm already soaked." 
"Is that right?" He seems delightfully surprised by such a revelation. 
"Mhmm." 
"I'm fucking rock hard if it helps, think I have been since last night..." You hear him shuffle, and you try not to imagine what's happening on the other end of the line, or how he looks lying in bed with said hardness.
When he groans hungrily down the line, you feel yourself quake once more. "The sight of you on your fucking knees... Christ alive." 
You can't help but giggle at your unintended teasing. "It wasn't on purpose, I thought it was cute more than anything." 
"Adorable and naughty, could cum just looking at it." He huffs. 
"You're just flattering me, besides, I could say the same about your picture."
Every part of you flushes thinking of the first photo he sent, all muscle and alpha male—it's like he was the physical embodiment of dominance, and just looking at him makes you want to kneel.
"You like the military get up?" 
"Love it, more than I probably should." 
"Oh aye, bet you'd love for me to order you around?" His words are playful, but underpinned with a hint of promise. "All in due time, eh?" 
"All in due time. What's your rank, anyway?" 
"Sergeant." 
"Wait..." You take a deep breath as you consider your question. "Can I ask for your last name or is it too soon?" 
"Mactavish."
Johnny Mactavish—you should remember to give that a quick Google search later.
"Sergeant Mactavish." You test the name on your tongue, trying to imagine him at work, following and giving orders. 
"Sounds too good when you say it, bonnie." He laughs. 
"Thank you, sergeant." Your affectation of the word is entirely intentional, as you attempt to rile him up with the use of his title. 
The throaty groan that leaves him is addictive.
"What else do you like to be called?" 
"Depends on what you want to call me really, but I like... sir." 
"I like it too, will have to remember that for the future, and just torture you with sergeant in the meantime." You can't help but giggle as you flirt. 
"Oh don't worry, am keeping score." He growls playfully. "Wait til I get ma hands on you, bonnie." 
"You're keeping score?" You gasp, a heady mix of fear and arousal coursing through you almost urges you to be even more of a teasing brat.
"Aye, spanking arm at the ready." 
"My pouting lips are ready." 
"Won't be the only thing you use them lips for."
Fuck fuck fuck. Not that you hadn't thought about it already, hadn't already let your mind drift to what his cock might look like—whether it matches the size of the man—now you're definitely thinking about it. Fixated on it, craving it. 
Some cards are best kept close to your chest so early on, so you change tack and go a different direction with his flirtation. "Yeah, with you in the room, I'd probably be smiling a whole lot." 
The two of you continue to chat, you asking what you can about his work as he asks about yours, and you fill him in on the boring world you live in, which seems especially boring in comparison to taking down cartels and traveling the world.
The conversation never stops being easy, the flirtation and innuendo always right there at the tip of your tongues as you tease each other relentlessly—giving as good as you get. All night, you're practically grinding against your duvet as you get lost in Johnny's dulcet tones, and you find yourself just letting him speak for the sake of getting to hear more of his voice.
As Johnny is about to ask you more about your background, you're overcome with a harsh yawn that you desperately try to stifle. Your eyes have been shut for the last hour at least, but with the command Johnny has over your nervous system right now, it's been easy to stay awake. 
"Tired, bonnie?" He asks, voice laced with sweet concern.
"Yeah..." Your voice falls quiet, as the thought of ending the call makes your throat constrict. "But I don't wanna stop talking." 
"Me either, but av got bad news." 
You know what's coming, and you know it isn't remotely anywhere near the end of the world, despite what your heart is telling you right now. "Go on." 
"I have to go." Even he sounds sad about such an outcome. 
"It's not even that late?" The clock reads 2 am. 
"Gotta get a wee bit of sleep before I hit the gym, and then get off ta work. Don't you have work too?" 
"Work from home tomorrow, so it's not too bad. Not fair though, I wanna keep talking." You admit quietly. It's too much too soon, but you're overwhelmed, the tide of your emotions crashing over the edges.
"Tell yer what. Next time we call, we can try leaving it on while we sleep."
Your heart flips, as you almost whimper at how cute the gesture is. "Are you trying to make me fall in love with you?"
"Obviously." There's that gorgeous laugh again. "Is it working?" 
"Just a little, but that might be the lack of sleep talking, I might be going slightly insane." 
Johnny sighs, and it's clear he's battling to keep a handle on his self-control. "Rest, bonnie, I won't be able to work knowing you're not sleepin'" 
You sigh too, accepting your fate. "Okay, just for you." 
"Just want what's best for you, you need your sleep."  
Your head spins at how utterly sincere he sounds—the care in his voice after such a short amount of time serves to drive you even deeper into this infatuation. "Already?" 
"Can't turn it off, am just protective by nature, bonnie. If you were my girl, you'd have a bedtime." 
And that makes your cunt clench and your heart soar. "Johnny..." You whine.
"Yeah?" 
You hesitate to say what you want to say next, but everything within you is calling out for him, desperate to be in his arms. "Don't make me wait too long to meet you, please." 
His laughter is sweet, conveying a sense of understanding more than anything. "I'll try ma best, supposed to be off on Friday." 
"5 whole days."
"Sure you don't wanna wait a bit longer?" 
You shake your head, mumbling a sound to convey your feelings. "Feels right, don't know how to describe it... do you feel it too?" 
Johnny takes a deep breath, his voice shaking slightly as he speaks. "I do, lass." 
"Good." You couldn't even attempt to fight the idiotic grin on your face, or how warm you feel inside and out. "I'll get some sleep, talk soon." 
"Goodnight, bonnie. Sweet dreams."  
You wait for Johnny to end the call, not wanting to push the button yourself and have his presence fade away. When your screen dims, you resist the urge to text him more, opting instead to put your phone on charge and roll over to Barnaby—wishing it was Johnny instead. 
914 notes · View notes
alicenpai · 4 months
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forgotten playthings, forgotten child 🧸
Jack from my series Lost & Found Children 🤍🖤
i hope to showcase more of my ocs in 2024 hehe! im FINALLY getting around to finishing art i left to rot in my folders (the pandora hearts drawing last month being one of em). if you saw the WIP of THIS particular drawing 2 yrs ago... no you didn’t 💔
my charas are very personal to me, but tbh ive always been a bit hesitant to share their stories. over time i realized ... it’s kind of a shame to not make art from one’s heart. which is something i regret a lot year after year whenever i make my yearly art summary reflection. i'm like damn i need to make more emotionally evoking pieces!!! so i'm gonna keep going in 2024 with that in mind ❤ i have to admit, although this drawing started 2 years ago, and there's a lot i would do differently if i were to supposedly draw it now - this concept goes pretty hard.
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the final drawing stayed pretty close to the original concept which im so relieved for! i think part of the reason why i left it on the backburner for so long, was the fact that i included so many details, and i was unsure of how to colour the "background". (not to mention stuff like cons & real life getting in the way).
i'm glad for discovering a really handy watercolour brush, it's helped me a lot in my last few drawings, bc i dont have to colour in each detail. especially since the witch hat atelier: eternal ephemera zine piece i did. otherwise if i coloured this back in 2022 with my usual method, i'm pretty sure i really would have included a shading and highlight layer for each individual toy... HAHAHA. much to think about
oh yeah and in the last few days of drawing this i was listening to some visual kei bands. i love how some of the band members literally have been performing since like the 90s or something and DO NOT AGE and are literal vampires. every so often i fall back into visual kei (you can tangentially thank aggretsuko although yes i know it's not the same). and i kind of realized. i like Jack's edgy design so much because he looks like. a visual kei esque vampire.
298 notes · View notes
savannahsdeath · 4 months
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a part3 of -this- which im actually proud of ❈ dealer!ellie and reader in love but nothing's perfect . finally a rough part . got carried away but enjoy:3
warnings: ANGST mention of sex, language
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the spring season brought the first warming breeze and blooming flowers to the land after the cold winter. the air was filled with the aroma of new blossoms and fresh grass. the sky was typically clear and blue with the occasional fluffy white clouds covering the bright sun. the days often got warmer, but some areas still experienced frosty nights. small animals such as bees and birds returned and chirped their familiar tunes.
spring was the time of rebirth and new beginnings.
you and your father met regularly over the past month. as time went on, your meetings became more and more enjoyable. you began to fill in the blanks and learn about each other, sharing memories and experiences. soon, these meetings became a regular part of your schedules. your relationship began to deepen as you got to know each other better. you started to share more intimate conversations and found comfort in that. your meetings became more than just catching up on life events - they became a source of strength and support for both of you. yet, you were rarely serious, since you started to notice your father’s playful sense of humor and found it endearing — how could ellie describe him as harsh?
right, ellie. she was just as captivating as your new-old parent's funny bone. she had a way of holding your attention and making you feel like nothing else mattered but her. you shared a connection that ran deeper than words could describe. your friendship grew as you bonded over your shared interests and passions — it turned out that she can be a nerd when it comes to dinosaurs. the more you learned about ellie, the more you were filled with a warm, tingling sensation that grew into something more.
until that one day — morning, to be exact. i won't beat around the bush — you fucked this night, and a few nights before, and a few more nights before that... but you didn't regret a thing. ellie could be more romantic than you guessed she is, but it was more than the physical connection between you that made these moments so special. there was a deep sense of intimacy and shared understanding between them - when your skin touched, it felt like you both are an unfinished sculpture, which melted into the other's undried clay limbs.
the gentle warmth of the sheets beneath you beckoned you up from your deep sleep, as if a stroke from the sun itself was caressing your skin. the warmth of your peaceful slumber was greeted with the golden glow of a new day. the embrace of the bed was like a sweet escape as you peered through your sleepy eyes at the sun rising outside your window. your eyes flickered. you noticed the lack of ellie's spirit and your hand ran over the empty part of bed to make sure she's not there, since your sense of sight wasn't trustworthy yet.
you heard her voice from the kitchen, and once you rubbed your eyes and squinted you identified her arm sticking out from around the corner. "tell her the truth," her voice was subdued and had a nervous, disbelieving undertone, "so that she would look at me through tears instead of seeing me as the love of her life?" a pause, during which the other person on the phone talked and you had time to memorize every word. "of course i do, but what choice would she have?"
"truth?" you whispered to yourself. your nerves were on edge as you strained to listen more closely to the dialogue. every sound of the voices became a point of intense focus, your anxiety grew with the realization that they may know something you don't. "choice?..." you tried to keep a steady breathing pace but every word was like a brick added to the wall of tension around your heart, threatening to crush you with the weight of the unknown.
you stretched, purposely making the bed creak, and loudly yawned.
"i have to go" ellie murmured and put her phone on the table. you heard her footsteps, figuring out she walked over to another countertop, probably to make her morning coffee.
you sat up on the bed, staring at the doorway to see her once she's on the view. "what was that, ellie?" you yelled.
she appeared in the hallway, already dressed up in a flannel shirt with a black tank top underneath and her usual torn jeans. "what?"
"who were you talking with?" you pinched the sheet's button and nervously played with the hem of the seam. "and what about?"
"oh, eavesdropping? not nice." she smirked and clicked her tongue, slowly turning around and making her way back to the kitchen. "if i tell you, i'd have to kill you!" she chuckled.
you whined. "don't laugh it off."
the playful laugh that danced upon her lips slowly faded away as an intense realisation washed over her. the mask she has been wearing for so long has slipped off, exposing the truth beneath it all. there was no more trying to cover up the truth with jokes. she was vulnerable and exposed, and all she could do now was accept that you know that something's off.
she licked her lips. "your father—" she cut off and slowly sat down on the bed next to you. she bent her knees and placed her hands on them, letting out a defeated sigh. she stared into the hallway, just like you before, though you had a reason to and her eyes seemed to be blind, not hoping to see anything in particular. hopeless. "i will betray him."
your confusion was palpable as your mind raced to catch up with the changing dynamic of the situation. the laughter and joking suddenly fall away like a veil dropped, revealing an atmosphere tinged with unease and uncertainty. your gaze remained on ellie, studying her expressions in search of a deeper meaning, wondering why the shift in mood suddenly occurred. you were unable to grasp the truth lurking beneath the surface and the other girl could see the wheels turning in your head as you searched for the missing puzzle piece to make sense of it all. whatever it meant, it wasn't predicting anything good. "if you do you will betray me."
"i'm sorry" she mumbled, cocking her head back, leaning it on the bed frame.
you frowned, knitting your eyebrows together in one line, creating a wrinkle on your forehead. "what are you talking about? what the fuck is going on?"
a sharp click echoed through the room, as the sound of a lighter being sparked filled the air. ellie always plays with it when she's nervous, making the momentary flash of light illuminate her face. the bright flame flickered as it was held carefully in the girl's hands, its warm glow emitting its own palpable warmth. "he's in trouble." the fire danced with a mesmeric grace, drawing all of the attention as emotions threatened to boil over.
"can't be that bad." your voice was begging, pleading for her to reassure you that it's nothing. you weren't sure what your father's job was, and you hoped it would stay that way, but now you knew you can't be out of it.
"but it is." she shrugged. "it's not like i have a choice anyway."
you huffed. "you do—"
"don't act like you know everything." she bitterly chuckled. "if i could be on his side, i promise you, i would."
"so there's more of you. you are just a pawn in their treacherous game." the rush of anger swelled within you as you rose from the bed, the truth finally setting in and filling your brain with a rush of emotions. the confusion melted away into wrath and hatred, the heat of your burning anger replacing the cold chill of uncertainty. "so what was your job? making me fall in love? did they force you to?" every word ringed in your head with the intensity of a thunderclap, stirring your fury and disappointment. your body felt heavy with the strength of your emotions as you began to realize everything that has been happening. "that's clever." you stopped pacing back and forth to accusingly point your finger at her. "you used me. i bet it was your own idea too, huh?"
"you can't be serious." she twirled a cigarette on the palm of her hand. "can i?..."
"you can do whatever you please, ellie." you proudly raised your chin and crossed your arms. "just not in my house."
"are you kicking me out?" she asked in disbelief, so strong she almost smiled. she stuck the unlit cigarette between her dry lips and put her hands in the air, like a surrendering thief. "whatever, i understand. but remember, it was me or him. it still is." she stood up and, without taking her eyes off you, walked up to the door.
✧˖°
YAYYY ANGSTY SHIT I LOVE ANGST MEOW
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princesssmars · 8 months
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another one of my dreams that i have to write out because it flabbergasted me and two of my friends. but this time about hazel from bottoms.
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ok, reader is the new girl at school. in my dream i was kind of a loser (accurate) but because i can write what i want (and i've read @ptolemaeacles cheerleader headcanons ten times) im changing it.
so reader is trying out to be cheerleader! it helps you make a few friends, isabel being the best one because she’s amazing, beautiful, and a little weird in a really endearing way. she finds you interesting, given your natural talent for dancing and how despite doing vulgar dance moves on the football field, off of it you can be a shy and sweet person!
because of this isabel, brittany and you are pretty much always together. and since they're popular and seen everywhere, that means you are seen everywhere!
which means hazel cant take a fucking break.
walking to sit with pj and josie during lunch and means almost having a heart attack when she sees you handing out flyers for the next school event, looking so ethereal in your cheer uniform she nearly trips over herself.
or when every morning she sits two rows over from you in math class, not so sneakily staring at you for minutes at a time while doing her worksheets.
despite being close to a genius, she thinks there's no way in hell you have ever noticed her. never seen the way your eyes will drift to her when she's sitting in the bleachers while, you're practicing, how you're heart will race when the teacher is calling names for project partners with the chance that the brunette could be in your group.
so sure you had a crush that was going nowhere, but you had a nice bunch of new friends, so people we're starting to like you!
all except one.
mrs. fucking barnes.
for whatever reason, your second period english teacher had decided on your first day to make your senior year a living fucking hell.
put a good amount of effort into an essay? you get a d minus!
want to share a comment you had about the book the class is reading? shut up silly, jeff is going to popcorn read and stutter over a basic sentence!
but one friday, you decided to skip class and the next week she went ballistic.
now, since moving to town, you had noticed that the people here were a little odd, regularly seeing a normal interaction or conversation go to the extreme in seconds.
so, when you're hovering over the toilet in the girls bathroom, a small thought in your brain that loves to say what if's asks: what if somebody bursted in here right now?
when you finish and stand up to pull your jeans up, only to be interrupted when the stall doors bust open with a loud bang! you think for split second that god can literally hear your thoughts and is making you pay for whatever sins you've committed.
those sins must have been fucking murder to make up for how mortified you felt standing in a cramped girls bathroom stall, your pants down with three people staring at you/
the first, mrs. barnes, wearing a look thats a mix between anger and regret.
the second is nettie brown, a girl you recognized from your art class who you remember complimented your heels and you did the same for her coat.'
and then, standing in front the sinks with eyes that look as big as fucking saucers, hazel callahan herself.
your brain catches up to your body and you manage to splutter out a string of curses and yells, forcing the door back closed as the teachers splutters out an excuse about someone telling her you had started doing weed in the bathrooms.
you hear her and some more shoes shuffling out of the bathroom, taking a minute to gather your bearings before you leave the bathroom. when you open the door again you rest your hands on the counter, your eyes closed as you take a breath. when you look up to your reflection, in your peripheral you see a figure standing awkwardly at the back of the bathroom, blue eyes avoiding looking at you.
"hazel?" you ask under your breath, turning around to look at her dead on. she flinches to attention like a child called to attention.
"uh...i just wanted to make sure that you were alright, what she did was really fucked up."
"oh," you mouth, grateful that after something so embarrassing this girl who you barely knew was waiting in a crappy bathroom to make sure you were alright. if it was possible your crush on her just grows. "thank you. that means a lot to me."
her face lights up so brightly you think it could light up a city.
"no problem! i mean, really who cares that much about weed, anyway? i've never cared about bush anyway-"
the room gets silent.
as she quickly rushes out an apology and leaves, all you can think about is how its weird you've been shocked like this twice in a span of ten minutes, and that you have got to ask hazel callahan on a date.
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i made this a lot cuter than it was in my dream. i was in the bathroom, looking at these really nice coats on the counter ?? when the door opened, hazel just said "y'know ive never minded bush" and the sheer confusion made wake up.
i put my senior year english teacher in here because. i still hate that bitch.
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sixosix · 1 year
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( a/n ) light angst, hurt/comfort, PROFANITY WARNING, guys im so sorry this is so short but its all im capable of rn
special mention TYSM @earthtooz for proofreading i owe u my soul
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he’s always been a little sensitive to people caring for him. he’s used to taking care of others, to have his parents let him get away with everything, and he’s spent his life isolating himself from people who would see him past what he is but for who he is.
reo rolls his shoulder to shove your hand off of him, frowning at the wall. “you know me well enough already, don’t you? you know that i hate it when you get like this.”
“this isn’t good for you, reo. you’re destroying yourself,” you snarl, jabbing at his back. “i’m sick of seeing you like this. i’m not a babysitter, nor your therapist.”
“i’m not asking you to worry about me, am i?” he snaps, finally turning to meet your eyes.
anger boils in your chest, but you let it simmer with a few deep breaths. reo isn’t thinking properly right now, raving on and on about not working hard enough, and how he isn’t catching up. “there isn’t a professional boundary between us, i care for you because i love you. right now, when you say shit like that? i can barely give a fuck about you anymore.”
reo’s sharp scowl falters around the edges, giving way to confusion. “where are you going?” he demands when you make your way to the door.
“away,” you say, slipping your shoes on and refusing to look at him. “you said you need space, right? then i’ll give it to you. we’re over.”
“fine.” his tone is biting, but his voice sounds strange. “fine…”
he’s still lethargic, you tell yourself; he doesn’t know what he’s talking about, and he’ll regret it later. but he doesn’t stop you.
maybe if you were to glance back at him one last time, you’d see the broken expression on his face hitting him right after.
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from the start, reo’s always been expecting you would leave him. everyone does that to him, anyway. even nagi, who he still considers his best friend. it was a little too good to be true with you, so he tells himself that this was bound to happen. that doesn’t mean it doesn’t hurt when it finally happens.
reo groans, shoving his face into his pillow. his friends snicker at his misery, so reo does what he needs to and flips them off with two hands. but as a groveling man with his face hidden by his sheets, it does not paint the intimidating picture he wanted.
“it hasn’t even been that long,” nagi remarks. he doesn’t spare reo a glance so unfortunately, he doesn’t get see reo flashing him with his middle finger.
“mmrgh,” reo says, still pressed against his bed.
isagi pats him on the shoulder, which doesn’t help anyone, but it’s the thought that counts.
“record him, record him, do it,” bachira says, clapping nagi on the back repeatedly, his strength enough to jostle him back and forth. obediently, nagi follows, pointing his phone camera right at a moping reo.
“day two without y/n,” nagi says to his future audience. “barely holding on.”
“i feel awful,” reo groans. “y/n blocked me.”
“do you regret what you said?” isagi asks.
“‘course i do,” reo hisses, offended that he would even ask that. “i was an asshole. y/n was right—y/n’s always right. i’m stupid.”
bachira snorts, “keep fighting, reo!” and barely manages to dodge the pillow thrown his way.
the camera pans back to reo, who’s looking red in the face, awfully pathetic. “fuck off. don’t post that. y/n’s gonna see it and make fun of me when we’re back again.”
nagi posts it anyway.
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chigiri hums thoughtfully, waving a hand in front of your face. “you don’t look like you moved on to me.”
you splutter, shoving his phone back onto him. you feel your heart pound in your ears and with the way chigiri smiles knowingly, you almost wonder if he can hear it, too. “shut up! why did he say that? i hate him.”
“sure you do. say what?”
“‘when we’re back together again’ like he’s so sure about it,” you try to say it like you’re angry, but your expression resembles reo from that video. it doesn’t come out as you want it.
reo looks much better now. nagi says that reo religiously followed your advice right after and has been faring better, which is a real shame since you can’t even see it for yourself. he looks less pale and much brighter, but instead of the anger you last saw him with, he’s just become a carbon copy of a wet blanket.
“aren’t you?” chigiri watches the post again, just to torment you with your sniveling ex. “getting back together again, i mean.”
“i’m leaving.”
“yeah? and go where? reo’s bed?”
“i’ll strangle you!”
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lilystyles · 1 year
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bloom.
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part four of the no strings attached series by @lilystyles
no strings attached masterlist & main masterlist xxx
authors note part four is hereeeeeee!! IM SO SORRY IT TOOK ME SO LONG TO WRITE THIS. i was drowning in assignments these past few months which is why it has taken me so long. i am now on my winter break yay, so i should be able to update more regularly thanks for the patience and love XXXX
brief description y/n and harry go to dinner and something stronger blooms between them.
warnings! smut (f!receiving, blowjob, sex, cumplay, loss of virginity but is all very romantic) unprotected sex (pls wear a condom), swearing, alcohol abuse, overall just a mature read. around 11.6k words. (she's longggg omg)
inexperinced!virgin!reader x fwb!harry
* * * * *
Harry and Y/n had managed to keep their new ‘relationship’ a secret for a little over a month which Y/n was very proud of, normally she couldn’t lie to save her life. He’d come over most weekends or she’d go to his and they would eat food, sometimes they’d cook sometimes they’d go out, they would watch films, sometimes at home sometimes in the cinema. But by the end of the night after a few wines and with an old soul record playing in the background they’d pleasure each other. 
It was simply perfect. Whatever, wherever they were at was the happiest they had ever been. Except maybe the few Christmases they’d had together as roommates.
Y/n had never thought she could enjoy someone else’s company this much. Within time she grew the most comfortable she ever had been with someone. He’d seen her naked, he’d seen her cry, he’d seen her bleed, and he knew all of her secrets. She felt so free around him. It was a wonderful feeling, she only wished she could tell her other friends about it and how great it was. How happy she was, how happy he made her. This free feeling? Did they have that too? Is that why they’d always encouraged her to get a boyfriend and put herself out there?
But she knew it was just easier this way — their own little bubble. Keeping it their little secret. Sometimes things went to shit once they were said out loud. She’d noticed that and was worried if she shared it with them he would disappear.
They still hadn’t had sex yet, Harry wanted to wait for the right moment for that. He knew that virginity was a silly construct but he still wanted her first time having sex to be something she wouldn’t regret. He couldn’t live with himself if he ruined that for her. He didn’t want it to feel forced and corny and like it was this dramatic live changing event but he didn’t want it to be in the back of a car in a dark car park either. He wanted it to be a nice moment. She’d been ready for weeks, since that first night even. But when Harry told her waiting was the right thing to do she listened and was grateful for his delicate handling of the situation. He was more experienced so she listened.
She trusted him.
When Harry got a text from James that day that the guys all wanted to go on a camping trip for a long weekend in the middle of spring, he called her immediately. 
After a few rings, she answered. “Hi, Haz!” She sounded breathless but chirpy.
“Hey, Lovie.” He could hear clatter in the background. She must’ve been up to something. A loud bang echoed in his ear.“What are you doing, Cheeky?” He said in a playful tone.
She giggled. “I’m attempting to perfect a cookie recipe. I had a bit of an anxious day, so I needed a distraction.”
“Why didn’t you just call me? I’m happy to distract you.” He said softly, grabbing a jumper from his cupboard. He was about to ask if he could come over, not that he needed to at this point.
She wondered for a moment if he meant that in a sexual way or not. Because everything had begun to blur. Sure most of the time when she saw Harry they’d pleasure each other, but sometimes he just held her warmly in his arms. Sometimes they did nothing at all. What did it all mean? Sometimes he felt like a boyfriend, most of the time actually.
“I’m sure you have a life outside of being my distraction.” She said stubbornly, mixing the batter in the large bowl. Her arm was aching. The smell of spices and ginger filled her nose, her biggest struggle when baking was usually not eating all the batter.
“Not really. So, can I come over?”
She giggled again, softly. “Of course. See you in 20.”
“Getting in the car as we speak.”
“Drive safely please.”
He smiled. “Always, Bun.”
When he arrived at her apartment he barely had to knock before she had already opened the door. 
“Hi, H!” She chirped.
“Hi, Petal.”
She opened the door wide for him. “Come in.” She was in a pair of boxers he had left behind a few nights ago they were dark blue and a tight old One Direction shirt. She’d supported them in the early stages of their career, that shirt was from way back when. She was covered in flour and other cooking ingredients, looking as adorable as ever. Wearing those ridiculous bunny slippers of hers.
He shut the door behind him following her to the kitchen where something good was cooking. She was making another batch of her cookies (she was famous for them).
“I thought you could give these to Gem and Anne when you see them, you said they were coming down last time you were ‘round. Of course, you don’t have to. But I miss them, and they used to like my cookies.” She said shyly, suddenly feeling embarrassed. He never took his eyes off her.
He grinned stepping closer to her with his arms wide. “You are the cutest.”
She blushed. 
“You should come to dinner.” He pulled her into his chest, chin resting on her head. Smelling the scent of her delicious shampoo as he squeezed the plump flesh of her arms and shoulders.
She looked up, arms still wrapped around his hips, “That isn’t very friends with benefits of us though, is it?” Tucking her head into his chest, he smelt so good today. Like every day. The woodsy fresh bodywash he used was still very strong on his skin and his hair was extra fluffy. He must have showered this morning.
“I’d have asked you, either way, Love. Y’know Mum adores you. Gem too.”
She looked up. “Okay….When is it?”
“Tonight, that’s sort of why I wanted to come over. And, did you see the text James sent?”
She shook her head and walked over to the living room and found her phone buried underneath the dozens of blankets. She now saw the chat flooded with texts. 
JAMES
Hi guys! Is everyone free next weekend for the long weekend? Me and Daisy have planned a lil getaway at the beach. We would love to go all together like the old times. Bring a tent and gear. X
DAISY
 and bring your party pants!!
OLIVE
I’m so there. :))
FINNLEY
I’ll check, I’ve got exams coming up. 
But fingers crossed.
PENNY
i am definitely coming !!!
MICHAEL
Yes bet bet. Sounds like a plan
JAMES
Harry? Y/n? U two in?
She looked up. “Sounds nice, a lil’ getaway.” She liked the idea of doing nothing with Harry by the beach and amongst nature.
“I’ll go if you go.”
That made her smile and she looked down before typing.
me and harry shall be there xxx
After that, Harry managed to get roped into helping finish the cookie decorating before Y/n rushed off to get ready for dinner. Harry had booked a swanky restaurant, so Y/n felt like she had to dress up just a bit more than their usual dinners.
Once she was out of the shower, she stared annoyedly in her towel at her options. 
She remembered when Harry used to come home from touring and Anne would throw these big but intimate dinner parties and invite all his family and friends. Y/n could just wear jeans to that and they’d all bundle up around a bonfire after dinner and look at the stars. Harry and her would share a wine or two and it was simple. Harry loved how normal he felt with Y/n, even the memory of her was enough to ground him. He was glad she was back in his life, and he felt now he was ready for it and ready for her.
Harry came down the hall to her room and sat down on her bed grabbing one of her teddy bears and cuddling it in his big arms. The sight was rather funny, this big tattooed man and a little pink teddy bear cuddled up in pretty feminine soft-looking bedsheets. “I’ve got to change and pick some gifts up from back home before we go, is that okay?” He asked watching her dig through her clothes.
She nodded. “Of course! But what should I wear? What do you think?”
She was oddly nervous about tonight even though every Christmas when she went home to Holmes Chapel she went over to Harry’s Mums house for a drink and sometimes had the odd text with Gemma. She was still in contact with that side of her life it was just now she was Harry’s date to dinner. But she wasn’t his girlfriend but they’d think she was and what did that mean? Anne and Y/n’s mother had wanted them to get married for years now since they were around 10. Would this be the new talk of the town between all the mothers? She knew it was likely. Gemma was probably bringing her partner Michal, so it felt really official or something. 
He watched her, her eyebrows were furrowed in concentration as she stared at her cupboard. 
“I’m just wearing a shirt and slacks. Simple.” He replied. “Don’t think too hard about it, you’ll look pretty in anything, Bun.”
“Harry, I bet all of your outfit is custom-made Gucci. I can’t compete with that!”
He bit his lip to hold back his laugh. “Lovie, calm down. Don’t work yourself up. Just wear somethin’ you feel nice in. If yeh’ worried about me caring that’s silly, I like yeh’ in anythin’.”
She remained frowning and started to dig through the dresses she had. She found one hidden amongst them, she wore it to her birthday once. It was a long golden slinky dress with lace detail on the hem and neckline. It was very delicate. And even though it was spring she knew it would still be chilly that evening so she grabbed a long brown coloured coat from off the door that she had been wearing most days to Uni. It was warm and woollen and she loved it.
Harry busied himself by scrolling through his phone while she got ready. It didn’t take her long, once she was happy with her outfit and had added a light pink scarf, a handbag and some shoes she went to the bathroom to do her makeup and hair. 
She had already blow-dried her hair before and it was in a lovely natural state so she didn’t bother changing it. For makeup she kept it simple, only enhancing her features. When she was ready and came out Harry looked up upon the clicking of her heels. 
His cheeks turned pink at the sight. Jesus. “Beautiful, Bun.” He felt no words could do it justice.
She blushed a bit too at those words and that admiring expression of his. “Thanks, Harryyy. Ready? I’ll get the cookies and lock up and then we can go, okay?”
He nodded at her standing up and following her lead as she’d put the cookies into a tin. 
Once she grabbed everything else she needed they got in Harry’s car and headed to his house.
Y/n was browsing Harry’s playlists and noticed a new one in there which was unnamed only with a pink heart as the title. He wasn’t really paying attention to her on his phone, his hand was carelessly thrown on her thigh and the other the wheel, they were both pretty silent, it was calm. So he didn’t notice her scrolling through the songs — it was this soft, romantic, sleepy, soul playlist. Full of a lot of her favourites and it felt like a cosy evening. So she put it on and placed his phone back into her lap. 
Harry’s ears pricked up at the sound of the song, she’d found the playlist. Was it obvious it was for her? Well, about her?
“You found it.” He whispered, the song was only softly playing as background noise. He didn’t have the radio up loud. So she heard him.
“Yeah, it’s like all m’favs.” She said, smiling gently. 
He contemplated saying it, feeling his heart speed up as he spoke, “I made it f’you.”
She finally met his eyes and gave him this dazzling toothy grin. “Aw, that’s nice, Haz. Really sweet.” She leaned over kissing his cheek. She laughed when her lipstick left a stain and she rubbed it. “Sorry.”
He just gave her thigh a squeeze in reply worried he might reveal himself if he said anything else and a few songs later they arrived at his house. He told Y/n she could wait in the car because it would take him 10 minutes max to get dressed. 
She nodded and scrolled through her Instagram while she waited and then replied to a text from her Mum before she turned her phone off and waited in silence. He was quick as promised and when he came out the door he was looking devilishly handsome. 
She felt her body react to it. Her cheeks turned pink, her pupils grew in want, and her hands itch to touch him. Her heart was hammering against her chest and she felt a familiar twist of want in her stomach. He was in a silky black shirt that was long and tight on his muscular arms, his buttons were undone and showed off his tattoos. Which reminded her of when he had his long hair and he was this pure sex god rockstar of a man. He had a pair of black flared pinstripe trousers to match and a pair of black boots with red detailing. He looked so good she wanted to faint. She felt her thighs squeeze in want and she sighed at herself, don’t be such a perv!
He had added some extra rings and jewels from his usual bundle. Something caught her eye. It was this golden pendant with a moon and star on it, she’d bought it for him for his 19th birthday, when they first started living together. She hadn’t seen him wear it in a long time, she’d forgotten she’d even bought the thing. Y/n remembered buying it. Harry had been with her, they were at a market full of random things looking for cheap furniture for their place. 
They were walking past this large jewellery stall and both admired the rings and style. It was different from the normal places they’d seen. They had tonnes of it. A glint of something gold had caught her eye, it was that pendant. It was one of the only gold among the silver. She touched it in admiration and Harry peered over her shoulder, saying it was pretty and he liked it. Harry said he thought it was cool and matched a lot of his other jewellery. But without much thought, he walked off to look at some couches in the next stall. 
Y/n knew his birthday was coming up and asked the jeweller how much it was. He was this eccentric gentleman, who smiled at her. Showing the matching ring to her which was very dainty and feminine that she didn’t even think would fit Harry’s fingers. She explained that she just wanted the necklace as a gift for someone. But he said that he would not sell either piece without the other. At the time he explained it was made for two lovers, so they’d always be together, but Y/n replied it was just for a friend, truly believing he was just trying to get more money out of her. But now looking back she and Harry loved wearing them and matching. It cost her more money than she could afford at the time but she was drawn to it. Something magical in the crafting of them.
Her hand reached over to touch his neck fingers touching the chain. “Oh, my god. I forgot about that.”
He grinned. “Found it the other day.”
She wished she knew where the ring was. “I remember that ol’ thing.” Sometimes when she was in the crowd or if Harry knew she was watching the show, in the early stages that is, he’d lift up the pendant and kiss it or touch his heart where it lay. Especially if he was playing a song Y/n liked (or that was secretly about her). Sweet Creature was one he wrote for her.
When they arrived in a rather fancy area of London with very expensive restaurants and hotels, Y/n could’ve laughed. They’d both grown up okay, but they were just normal working-class families and they weren’t spoiled. She wished she could go back and tell young Harry who was always working away on his singing that’d he’d be here. She wished she could run into the bakery and tell him he’d be the most famous man ever. Tell both the young kids who were working selling pastries and bread that they would be here in a short time, together.
The valet collected the car and Harry slinked his hand into hers when they stepped out, and Y/n thought she spotted someone giving them a double-take. They quickly entered the restaurant, and the concierge took their coats for them. 
The restaurant was warm and heated, with all these crisp white tablecloths, mood lighting, and crystal glasses. The waiter immediately guided them to their table which was a fancy booth and Anne was already there waiting. She got up and instantly pulled Y/n into her arms. 
“I’m so glad Harry brought you, Darling! It’s so good to see, look at that gorgeous face of yours.” She squeezed her cheeks and kissed her forehead leaving a big mauve-coloured lipstick stain there. Y/n grinned so big and pulled her back in for another hug whispering sweet comments.
Anne was so lovely, Y/n had always loved her. She made one of her favourite people, and it made sense why he was so respectful and kind. So perfect.
Harry was next to be welcomed, bending down to be fussed over in her arms. Anne questioned if he’d been eating enough and began a tangent of worried remarks. He was such a momma’s boy, he could only smile gently at her.
When Gemma and Michal arrived they greeted Y/n too with hugs and kind comments and once their meals arrived all her tensions eased. She now knew she had been silly to worry. Harry’s family were just as lovely as him. She knew that already and this pressure of her being his date was stupid. They already liked her, they knew her, and they’d seen her grow up beside Harry. She was just Y/n and he was just Harry.
They ate wonderful dinners and drank expensive brands of champagne, along with some fancy French dessert Y/n had never tried that Harry insisted she ate. It was a perfect night and she was sad to say goodbye to them all. When Harry dipped to the bathroom for a minute Anne pulled her aside. 
“I’m so glad you two are getting closer again, you’ve always been my favourite of his girlfriends. And these cookies! So delicious, I love when you send them over at Christmas time. Harry steals the whole thing of them, usually. No one can keep their hands off them. Ever thought of selling them?”
“Thank you, Anne. Thanks for letting me come, I hope I didn’t intrude on your family night.” She didn’t have the heart to tell her otherwise. She wished she was one of his girlfriends and she was glad someone appreciated her cookies.
When Harry back came from the bathroom he saw Y/n hugging his mum, and his heart melted at the sight. 
Y/n was good with people, and his family had always loved her. She was so gentle and well-mannered. Their Mums were very close too which helped. When they had drifted Anne still updated him that Y/n was doing well, and he was always pleased to hear that.
Harry said his goodbyes too and promised them something about bringing Y/n to another family catch-up, she just smiled warmly with pink cheeks at the idea. She was leaning into his side, his big arm draped over her shoulders as he kissed her temple. 
The valet handed Harry the keys and they slid into his car before driving back home finally. It was around 10 in the evening and Y/n was absolutely blissful, her hand had found his lap stroking his thigh gently as a light patter of rain began to fall down on the windows. 
“You were wonderful tonight. Mums’ always loved you though, Petal.” His eyes were on the road but he was grinning anyway — unable to contain it. He felt so fucking happy.
She grinned softly. She was pretty sure she was all heart eyes for him right now. She imagined she probably looked like one of those cartoons where the guy sees a pretty woman walking down the road and his eyes pop out and his head starts spinning. 
“Thanks for bringing me, Harry. It was lovely. I had a really nice night.”
He looked at her as if to say ‘duh’, “Of course, I’d bring ya’ I know we didn’t talk for a while there, but I thought of you a lot. And y’know Mum, loves ya’. You’re very important to us all.”
She looked away from him blushing down at her free hand before nodding, and softly replying. “I thought of you too. Why didn’t you come to Mum’s New Year’s party? I waited for you the whole night…”
He sighed thinking back to what she was talking about. 
“I was in Japan.” He replied. “I really did contemplate flying back just for the party, but I wasn’t sure if y’wanted me too.”
She looked over at him. “I didn’t know that.”
“I know.” He replied softly.
The rest of the car journey was quiet, the gentle hum of the radio played along with the sound of rain softly hitting the glass. Harry didn’t speak he just moved his hand onto his thigh where hers rested, giving it a squeeze.
It didn’t take long to arrive back at his house, Harry opened the door for her and they quickly rushed inside to avoid the rain it had grown heavier and more wild. Y/n stepped inside first with a sigh, and Harry was not far behind. His hands slid onto her hips and lower stomach, and he kissed her neck just below her ear. 
She giggled, her hands finding his. He began to whisper sweet nothings to her but was cut off by her phone ringing. He grunted in annoyance but she said she had to take the call. 
He didn’t let go of her, clinging to her childishly and nuzzling his head into her soft shoulder. 
“Hi, Mum.” She said into the phone, Harry paused his touch.
He could hear the sound of Y/M/N over the phone muffled.
“Anne already told you?” Y/n wanted to laugh. She looked at Harry who sighed, of course, Anne had already rung Y/n’s Mum. 
“No. We aren’t dating Mum. We are just friends.” She sighed. Harry chuckled. 
They weren’t just friends now. Friends don’t make each other cum, they don’t kiss, or see each other naked, friends don’t do what they do. They were way past that line now. He knew her inside and out and now he knew her more intimately than anyone ever had. Harry wondered if he’d ever have the balls to approach the subject of their relationship and where he stood.
“Mum, we were never dating. Please stop telling people he’s my ex-boyfriend.” She laughed. Her Mum was a funny old thing.
“Okay, I gotta go now. Bye, Mum.”
The muffled voice spoke again.
“Yep. Yep. Okay. Love you too. Bye.” She let out a big sigh hanging up the phone. 
Harry was taking off his shoes and belt, he seemed sleepy but content. He was sat on the couch, he’d turned the mood lighting on. It was this warm glowy orange hue that washed over the room. He looked up upon hearing the end of the conversation.
“What is it with Mums?” He teased her as leant back against the plush white sofa. Y/n described it as sitting on a cloud. She napped on it all the time. His legs were all spread out and his head was thrown back.
Harry was so fucking hot. All the time. Did he never get tired of looking so handsome?
She shrugged, walking over to sit beside him and threw her legs up so she was laying on his lap. Her cheek rested on his thigh, and Harry’s painted fingernails scratched the roots of her hair. She made a little content sigh, letting her eyes flutter shut. Him touching her was like heaven.
“Mm. Feels nice, Harry.” He let out a little chuckle. She was practically purring from his touch, all curled up on his lap. Her hands were resting on his knee, and he found himself admiring them. So dainty and delicate. Sometimes he pondered adding a ring to that finger of hers. He thought she’d be a very good person to grow old with. She loved routines and nights in, but she was witty and intelligent, though she loved simplicity she was definitely not boring. She kept you on your toes.
He wanted to stay like this forever. She was practically falling asleep in his lap, like putty in his hands. She made the odd sigh or moan in contentment every now and then as he let her destress. 
She had been a bit stressed with Uni and her life at the moment, the work of it all was hard right now, so he wanted to do anything to help her calm down. The dinner had been a nice distraction for her, and she seemed a lot happier that evening than the text he had received from her that morning. 
She rolled over to her other side so her face was near his hip nose grazing against his skin which smelt so fucking good — he used this expensive woodsy cinnamon soap it made her want to lick him all over. He continued his slow and delicate scratch on her head and his other hand rubbed her exposed back. Her hands moved to under his shirt, trailing along his fern tattoos and grazing the wisps of hair that lead underneath his waistband. Her nose grazed his skin as she tiredly nuzzled into him, feeling her eyes shut. She felt so safe in his lap and arms.
It was so domestic. They had become so domestic. He wished every day he could come home and say something cheesy like ‘Honey, I’m home!’ and scoop her up into his arms and kiss her silly. He longed for nights like this watching TV as she rested on his chest, moving with the rise and fall of his chest. He wanted the mornings too. When she grumpily didn’t want to wake up unless it was from kisses and a coffee.
“Do y’want some wine?” He asked her, his voice all raspy.
They’d only each had a glass of champagne with dinner which had long since faded. Leaving them very sober.
“Sure. Red?” She asked sitting up. Her hair was slightly messy from his playing with it.
He nodded his hand finding her chin and lifting it up. “Whatever y’want, Lovie.” He kissed her forehead before getting up and moving to the kitchen. She finally took her heels off and removed her scarf placing them on the floor. She stood up, feeling the soft rug on her sore feet. 
She leaned down to the coffee table lighting some candles of his. She lit a soap-smelling one and then a lavender one. Then once she was happy with that she walked over to his records and looked for something nice to play. 
She stumbled upon a Marvin Gaye one and she giggled to herself. It was kind of cheesy love making music, so she picked that one. She placed the record down on the turn table part and placed the stylus down. It began to hum a gentle sultry song and she moved back to the couch. 
When Harry came back she was laying on the couch, spread out as she hummed along to Marvin Gaye. In his hands, he had a bottle red all the way from New Zealand and two pink-tinted wine glasses. 
He laughed at her. “Look at yeh, Minx.” He teased. 
She smiled up at him, her dress was hiked up and she looked like the embodiment of idleness. She sat up so he could join her and he poured them both a glass.
They only had two glasses each before Y/n started to droop tiredly against his shoulder. He found her particularly adorable like that. When he finished his final sip he helped her up so they could go to sleep, he blew out the candles too. She followed him lazily up the stairs and into the bedroom, arms wrapped around his waist and tummy. 
He found a random Fleetwood Mac shirt and some grey tracksuit pants for her to wear in one of his messy drawers.
She changed out of the dress and was so happy to get her bra off. It was this pretty lacy one that had Harry frothing at the mouth. Her undies followed once he began to change as well. He found a pair of black silky sleeping pants and didn’t bother with a top.
She followed him to the ensuite and found the cotton pads and makeup remover he had just for her. She began to wipe off the makeup and was glad to be rid of it. He was brushing his teeth silently beside her and she watched him through the mirror. He caught her and gave her a wink. 
She just made a little kissy face in response. He smiled against the toothbrush, a rim of foam around his lips. Once she was done with all that she threw the rubbish into the small bin beside the toilet. 
“Do you have face wash?” She said quietly.
He nodded, spitting into the sink. “Just up there.” He pointed to the cupboard which was also the mirror. 
She opened it, rising on her tip toes for a second.
“Blue.” He replied. She squinted trying to find the blue bottle, he had an array of skincare products. She saw a big dark blue bottle, she reached for it and he nodded showing her that was the right one. 
They both washed their faces together and he smiled watching it foam up against her skin. Once they had washed their faces Y/n finally brushed her teeth and they went to bed. 
She sighed slipping into the big fluffy bed. He had some pale blue sheets on this week. He slid in beside her wrapping his strong arms around her and pulling her into him. He nuzzled his face into her neck and shoulder, the very slight stubble nipping her skin.
The backs of her thighs pressed against the front of his, her bum pressed up nicely against his soft silky pants and his hands squeezed the soft plump of her tummy in comfort. It wasn’t particularly late, but they loved to be inside Harry’s big bed and just cuddle.
“Y’were just perfect tonight. How someone hasn’t swept y’up and kept yeh I dunno…” He whispered kissing the top of her header, nose brushing against her hair, inhaling her shampoo. 
She flushed. “No one’s really tried, H.” He made her heart pick up at the comment. This man and his flattery.
“Lucky f’me. Means I can have ya’ all ta’ myself.” It was meant as a joke, but honestly, he selfishly did want her all to himself. She was so perfect.
She giggled. “Lucky you.”
He squeezed her closer and tighter. She giggled some more, wriggling in his grip. One of his hands moved to her upper thigh. She stopped and leaned into the touch. They didn’t talk they just started to relax into a sleepy silence, the chilly air making them want to bask in each other’s warmth even more.
He kissed her shoulder every now and then soothingly and Y/n shut her eyes. Basking in the feeling of him. His presence made her feel so safe she wanted to sleep often.
“Harry, do you ever think about how long we’ve known each other?” She asked randomly, as his hands continued to rub her body feeling her soft skin against his palms.
“All the time, Petal. Why?” He said softly, his voice was all raspy and gravelly. It made her feel something in the pit of her stomach. He made it even harder for her not to beg for him, this waiting game felt like edging.
“It’s just funny to me how much we have changed, but also how little we have too. I mean we’ve known each other since what? Daycare? And that little boy is still you…”
He understood exactly what she meant. Some things would never change about Harry even with age. Like, he would always be kind and always make an effort. He would always have 3 sugars in his tea unlike, Y/n who would prefer none. He would always enjoy cheesy romance films and love the idea of love. He will always admire old couples walking down the street. And she would always see the more practical side to love. 
She thought back to when they were younger teenagers and how he was rather distant from her in the sense that they were in the same friend group but funnily enough never really talked alone. Then she remembered that in their final year at school Harry, who had refused to dance with anyone else, asked Y/n to dance with him because he knew she’d been waiting for the boy she fancied to ask her all night. Sitting all pretty by herself, feeling like her efforts had been a waste. Only to find herself in the hands of him, spinning and laughing underneath the disco ball.
Then in University when they found out they were going to the same place they naturally found an apartment together, with a slight push from their mothers. Who felt at ease knowing their babies would have each other. Which was weird at first but soon they were at a furniture shop testing mattresses and giggling. 
She never felt uncomfortable around Harry, but once she was close to him she knew she was done for. She knew that for the rest of her life, she’d want him. Crave him close to her. He kind of felt that too, but in a different sense. 
It was more like they kept finding each other unplanned. During school they’d had so many lessons together, sitting with each other quietly. After school, his Mum had her family over for a meal. Then sometimes at the bakery, where they served familiar faces, and between breaks they sipped hot chocolate together. At the end of year dance Y/n and Harry were the only two without dates, and so he danced with her. When University rolled around no one else was going, and of course, Y/n had accidentally by luck of the draw picked the same school as him. They both happened to need a roommate and then they were roommates, then finally best friends. It was as simple as that, it just fell into place with her. He never forced anything. 
Oh, how he loved those memories of being her roommate and best friend. Whenever he thought back to those times he couldn’t help but grin. Neither had ever anticipated anything that would happen — him famous, and her here with him, cuddled in bed.
“It’s like we can’t not be in each other’s lives. You’re always there for me, showing up.” Was all he could manage to say. 
It’s true, when they had drifted and he did a tour for his first album she came to a show with her own money. 
Anne had called her up explaining in a panic how nervous he was for this tour. It was his first without the band. So, with little thought Y/n went in support because no one else could make it, Anne and Gemma both had stuff they couldn’t back out of. Anne knew Y/n would do it for Harry. Everyone knew she’d do just about anything for him except, well, him.
She was in the front row, dressed in a familiar outfit that took him back in time. It was this lavender dress from their school days. She’d worn it to the dance. It was bouncy and had big puffy sleeves, all short and fluffy.
He hadn’t expected it at all.
He came out, dancing and going wild for one of his louder and more upbeat songs. When he finally greeted the crowd he scanned them and said politely. “Hi, I’m Harry!”
She rolled her eyes. How was he still so devilishly charming?
He spotted something familiar, someone, familiar. Her eyes, her smile, and that dress took him back. Suddenly he felt like he was at home, in Holmes Chapel and he was just singing karaoke with his old friends. 
“Y/n?!” He said with a grin. Completely shocked, he shook his head in a puppydog like manner. The few longtime fans in the crowd cheered loudly, knowing her from photos off his Instagram. Anne had a few up on her Instagram too and they seemed to love Y/n in the comments (mainly).
She waved at him. Mouthing, “Hi, H!” She couldn’t contain her smile.
She could see in his eyes how much it meant to him. They got all glassy and soft. Even if they hadn’t spoken in a while she calmed him down immediately. He hadn’t realised how much having her there would calm him. 
She was like chamomile tea, a warm bed, all things nice and calming.
“Thank you for being here, for those of you who don’t know, Y/n is a very old friend of mine. We worked together in a bakery.” He jested.
Y/n giggled.
It felt right for him to sing this song next, “This next one is Sweet Creature.”
“I’ll always be there for you, H. You know that.” She said tenderly.
He rolled her around to face him so he could see her pretty face spewing these kind words. This deep pensive look in his eye. “I’m…I’m really glad you’re here with me…in this moment…this time in my life. I never really noticed how mundane life felt until you came back into mine.”
She felt herself melt like ice cream sitting in the blistering sun during a summer day. She kind of wanted to cry at how sweet he was. Harry wasn’t even her boyfriend but shit these feelings. They were real. Her body went even softer in his arms.
She lifted her hands up from her sides to his cheeks pushing his head down so she could lean in and place a kiss on his forehead. His hair smelt delicious like soap and peppermint.
He hadn’t expected that but he felt himself flush pink. The innocent touches are what made him blush the most. She was so gentle with him. 
“Oh, Harry.” She sighed, pulling away and tucking a stray curl of his behind his ear. “Me too.”
He smiled leaning forward. “Can I kiss you?”
Y/n rolled her eyes teasingly. “Of course.”
His hands slid around to her back, blunt nails scratching her skin perfectly underneath the Fleetwood Mac shirt. He leaned forward into her lightly pecking her puffy lips, remaining very gentle at first. Her hands moved to his neck fiddling with the hair that rested there as she leaned into him. She threw her leg up to his hip and he moved one of his hands to stroke it gently. It was so soft and romantic. 
As the kiss began to deepen she gripped his shoulders trying to press her chest even closer to his wanting to be as close to him as possible. He hummed softly, feeling her tits press into him. Her nipples were hard and he wanted them in his mouth. 
“Mm, you’re perfect.” He muttered against her lips.
She smiled into the kiss, and he used that as an excuse to slip his tongue in ever so slightly. That’s when the kiss began to grow more fiery and passionate. He nibbled her lip and pulled her body even closer letting her roll on top of him as she mewled. 
Her hips rocked needily against his silky pants and he moved his kisses down her jaw and neck peppering them frenziedly, loving the little whimpers and whines that escaped her lips. Which only spurred him on to continue further down to the top of her chest.
The way she was rocking against him was making him lose his mind. Her hands clawed his chest as she whispered quietly. “Please, Harry.” 
This tension had been building for weeks. She wanted him so fucking badly. It was always on her mind, and it was honestly distracting. She’d been trying to write an Essay that morning and all she could think of was him, and in a horny flurry, she imagined him bending her over the desk. Making her scream with pleasure as he often did.
“S’good f’me, Baby.” He breathed out. Hands finding her hips now, forcing them harder against him. Thinking filthy thoughts of him burying himself in her dripping pussy. 
Her lips pressed into his shoulder and then slowly moved down the side of his body, kissing along his tattoos, biting and licking some parts of his tanned bare skin. Until she was finally by his waistband, her pink chipped fingernails teased his snail trail of hair that led to underneath the silk. His skin was so soft there.
His eyes became all hooded, animalistic-like. He was looking at her like he wanted to eat her. But he remained calm and gentle with touches. His hands found her hair, all his rings were off so she felt no sting of metal on her skin. His fingers were running through it delicately and moving it away from her beautiful face.
“Prettiest girl in the world.” He muttered and she blushed resting her cheek on his thigh. 
“Thank you, Baby.” She sighed. 
She only ever let those pet names slip during these moments and it made him so fucking needy for her. He just smiled softly, at ease. “Of course.”
“Can I taste you, H? Please?”
He let his eyes shut and he softly whined as her hand palmed against his pant-covered cock. He was stiff beneath her touch, and she could feel him throbbing at the contact. “You can do whatever you want to me, Angel.”
She giggled teasingly giving his prick a firmer squeeze. “Don’t promise me that. We’ll never leave this bed.”
He took a shaky breath at her words, she was just so fucking hot without even trying. She literally just spoke her mind, and it had him frothing. 
“Is that a threat or a promise?” He replied breathily.
He opened his eyes, thinking back to all those nights in school when he’d dreamt of her sexually. He’d felt guilty a lot of the time for it of course, but she was just so fucking pretty and sexy without realising it. Like when they went swimming during the summer and she wore this cute little pink floral bikini, he would go home and in the summer heat, he would imagine it was her wrapped around him. He’d probably wanked to every filthy fantasy he’d ever had. Her sucking him off, maybe him fucking her throat watching tears spill from her eyes. Him eating her pretty pussy and making her feel so good she saw stars. Making love to her softly and romantically as she deserved, and sometimes he thought of fucking her roughly and needily. In different positions for hours. All the ones he could think of. But every time he came, he’d come back to and realise it was just his fist and not her mouth, hand, or precious pussy.
But now she was here in front of him, eyes all big looking up at him, ready and eager to take him into her mouth. She was real and she wanted him.
“Yes, Angel.” He rasped.
These moments always felt surreal to him. Especially because of how well they knew each other, now that they had started to explore each other’s bodies it was the most vulnerable they had ever been. No one would ever know them better than each other. 
Which is why her hand that was ghosting over his thick cock made him feel so close already from a mere touch.
She was dream-like.
“Mmm.” He whined. He was sensitive to her touch always, but tonight it was more than usual. They both pulled his pants off together so she could rest between his thighs, her mouth right in front of his leaking pink tip.
She was feeling a bit more vocal tonight. He loved it. “You have such a pretty dick, Harry. So big and veiny.”
He laughed softly, his hand running through his hair which had fallen into his eyes. “You think so?”
“I never really thought I could actually feel that way until I saw yours. It’s so pretty like the rest of you. It makes sense you have such a nice cock, it matches.” This new side to her had him dying in want.
God, he just wanted her so badly. He wanted to feel those pink slick lips around his cock, and watch her take him into her tight throat. Last night he’d even cum to the thought in the shower.
“You’re so sweet to me, Bun.”
She gave a gentle smile in response before shuffling closer to his glistening prick. Pursing her lips slightly as a string of spit dripped landing on the ruddy head, his breath hitched at the contact. His hands gripped the sheets roughly. When she finally leaned down close to him she did a signature kiss like always. The sight alone was enough to make him cum.
“Such a good girl for me, Baby.” He muttered his hands coming up to her hair pulling it away so he could see her adorable face as she kitten licked against his slick shaft. Her face was flushed pink like always when they’d been kissing, so pretty. She clenched her thighs at that comment and he noticed, very well aware now how much she loved his praise. Loved being told she was good for him, because she truly wanted to be good for him.
Leaning down further she fully enveloped his tip into her mouth, her tongue was a welcome contact against him and he whined loudly. “Fuck.” He said softly and involuntarily throwing his head back.
She had gained more confidence since that night on New Year’s Eve, she knew how he liked and had learnt to make him cum in mere minutes now. She had learnt to take most of him in her mouth too. Which she was surprised she could do considering how large he was.
As she swallowed him deeper into her mouth he heard a little choking sound as she went deeper than usual. Her nose grazed his navel and he cried out. She was taking him so fucking deep, the trail of hair tickled her noise.
“Shit, just like that sweet girl, so fucking good, deep. Fuck.”
She began bobbing her head faster and could feel him throb against her tongue, she would never be used to how large she was ever but she had started to learn ways to take him. He moaned loudly, unable to contain himself at her rapid pace. She pulled up for air for a second her hand coming down to stroke his slick cock at the loss of her throat so he wouldn’t miss her touch.
“H, y’can guide my head, it’s okay. I wanna make y’feel good. Move your hips too if that’s what you want.” She said slightly out of breath, spit and precum dribbled down her chin.
He looked at her eyes for reassurance and he saw a content look in them. “Okay, Love, just tap my legs if it’s too much.”
She nodded. “Ok, H.”
He smiled and she moved back down, taking a deep breath before she took him back into her mouth. He sighed, “Ah, mm.”
His hands had moved into her hair holding her head soft yet firm on his cock, when she made it to about halfway around him her tongue was swirling delicately against his engorged prick and he felt so close to cumming already. It had only been a few minutes.
She was struggling to stop her legs from squeezing together, his sounds made her so wet she felt herself dripping down her thighs. He began to gently guide her head into a bobbing rhythm and he felt a drip of precum fall out his head and he knew if they’d kept this up in another few minutes he’d cum. 
“Oh god, Y/n, your so fucking perfect taking me like this. Letting me use you.” He uttered, “Such a good girl letting me take your mouth like this. So filthy. My filthy girl.”
She moaned softly against his twitching cock and he whined, pulling her head up off him. She took a large breath in. “What’s wrong? Did I hurt you?” She said quickly. 
He shook his head quickly. “No, you were fucking perfect, I just don’t want to cum yet.”
She looked at him, eyes all doe-like and lips sticky with his slick. Cocking her head to the side, “Why not?” 
He moved his hands to her shoulders. “Let me take care of you, I wanna make you feel good. You’ve been so good for me today. Such a sweet little thing. Let me take of my sweet girl.”
My sweet girl. Y/n felt her heart skip a beat.
She listened but pouted at his request. Sad his cum wasn’t down her throat. “Harryyy,” She whined. 
“What is it, Love, hmm?” But he knew full well what she was whining about. It had been apparent from the first night that Y/n loved his cum. She loved making him cum. In her mouth, on her tits, whatever he wanted. She often daydreamed of it in other places. Harry knew this.
She just continued to pout. “Enough whining. Be good f’me.” He ordered. “Let me take care of you. ”
Her face remained pouty but she spread her legs for him anyway and he yanked her pants down in one motion, she opened her legs for him widely and his hands stroked her thighs feeling the soft skin there. He motioned for her to take her shirt off as well. She threw it across the room.
He moved his hand up to her mouth tapping against her wet lips, he did that when he wanted her to suck on them.  She opened her mouth for his fingers making sure to swirl her tongue around them just to tease him a bit. He moved his eyes from her glistening pussy to her mouth and cheeky expression. He pulled them away. The popping noise made him smirk. 
“I don’t exactly need the help, you’re already dripping for me.” He teased, running his newly lubricated fingers against her puffy clit.
She moaned as her hips stuttered against his gentle hand. He laughed at her.
She wanted to be embarrassed but this being the millionth time Harry was between her legs she had given up hiding how wet he made her. Most mornings he wanted to start the day that way, right between her soft thighs pressing into his cheeks. 
“How could I not be, Harry? You drive me mad.” She replied her hands moving to his hair.
He smirked biting his lip. The heat of his breath made her squirm against him and his nose bumped her swollen clit. He leaned forward and pressed a kiss there. The taste of her was sweet and tangy on his tongue, and he was addicted. He began to lap up all the leaking arousal, making a filthy sound in his silent room. 
Her moans were soft and freely escaping her mouth, thighs squeezing against him as she tugged on his soft hair. She felt at complete ease underneath his harsh tongue. 
All her stress was melting away with his lick and suck, this was such a good outlet for her worries. She only thought of him. His mouth, his moans, and his prick.
“Harry,” She whimpered at the feel of his firm tongue. “Shit.” She breathed throwing her head back into his pillows, screwing her eyes shut. 
She felt his fingers glide up and down against her weeping hole until he finally slipped one inside. Feeling her clench against him firmly, he wished he was inside of her right now. Her velvety walls were so wet against his hand and he felt her dribble onto his hand as he began to speed up his thrusts. He added another finger.
His tongue didn’t stop suckling on her clit and curled his fingers against her, feeling the way her pussy stuttered against his fingers in an irregular clench. A telltale sign she was getting close to the brink of her orgasm.
“Jesus, Harry, how are you s’good at tha’? Think m’gonna cum soon.” She purred as her hips lifted up and her back arched off the bed.
He pulled his mouth back for a moment, his fingers speeding up and going deeper, as he rasped from wet lips. “S’okay Baby, cum for me, let go. Be good n’ cum f’me. I want it.”
She let out a mewling whine, tugging his hair harder. It was as if his words was the final thing she needed before she felt the start of her pleasure rise in her stomach.
He quickly moved his mouth back down and felt her puffy clit throb against his tongue and a drip of her slick fell down his chin as she let out a guttural cry.
A wave of bliss spasmed from her stomach to her stretched-out pussy, and she felt it pulsate over her entire body. Her eyes squeezed shut and she tugged his hair hard enough that he grunted against her.
“M’cumming! Fuck!” She felt lightheaded.
He pulled up for air, pumping his fingers quickly. “Good girl.” He praised breathily. Spent from working hard to make her cum.
When he felt her come down fully from the high of her climax he pulled his fingers out and licked them clean. “Mmm. I love how you taste, Petal. Sweet.”
She let her thighs drop in fatigue and she lifted her hand to her sweating forehead. Her blissed expression made him grin.
“Fucking hell, Harry.” Her tummy clenched at his words.
Her hand grabbed his shoulder and he moved back on top of her pulling her into a chaste kiss. She could taste the tang of herself on his lips. His tongue slid against hers and he tasted of her. She moaned softly into his mouth. He pulled back, “You’re so beautiful.”
She bumped her nose into his. “Harry?”
He kissed her jaw, “Yeah, Love?”
“I want you inside of me. Please.” She sighed, pupils dilated. “I want to be close to you, Harry.”
“Are you sure?”
She mewled. “I want you so bad, Baby. Please.”
How could he say no to her? She was all sweet and whiny, and her naked in his bed. “Okay. I want that too.” 
He pecked her lips softly before pulling away. “Gimme one second.” 
He got up off the bed and moved over to his bedside table finding a box of matches and lighting the few candles he had there.
She giggled at him. “What are you doing?”
He just grinned, “Making it special, Lovie.” 
She felt her chest flutter and a big toothy grin made its way to her face. Harry knew that Y/n was more practical, he was the hopeless romantic out of the two of them. But he wanted to make Y/n feel special, he wanted to be sappy for her.
He got up again walking into his cupboard.
“What else are you up to back there?!” She said with a giggle. 
When he came back out he had a bag with something in it. It was hard for her to see because it was dark. She squinted trying to understand. 
“Hold on stay there.” He said nipping his lip, he grabbed a handful of contents from the bag. Before throwing them onto the bed around her.
She opened her eyes looking to her sides under the dim light, plucking one up in between her fingers. “Is that rose petals?”
“Yeah.” He smiled, scratching his neck nervously. “I know it’s cheesy, but I wanted you to feel special.”
She couldn’t believe he went to all that effort. 
“Anything else?” She prodded.
He smirked. “One more thing.” He pulled something out from behind his back. It was one of those cheap plastic roses and he put the stem in his teeth and raise his brows. 
She laughed loudly, gently pushing his shoulder. “You are so corny!”
He pulled the rose out of his mouth, offering it to her goofily, feigning a gentlemanly gesture. “Thank you for allowing me the pleasure of being the first. I feel so lucky. It’s truly a privilege.”
She rolled her eyes. “Oh shoosh.”
“I’m serious. I know it’s silly, but I feel grateful that I can be with you in this way. You’re my best friend. You’re very special to me.” He said tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. She leaned into the warmth of his palm.
“You’re my best friend, H. I wouldn’t want anyone else to be my first. I trust you.”
He felt his heart swell and he moved back on top of her. His arms were straight beside her head. 
“Kiss me please.” She said breathily.
He moved his face closer, nose bumping into hers as he pecked her top lip. She met him in the kiss her hands glided over to his shoulders. Both their eyes fluttered shut. 
There was little urgency in their kiss, though Y/n felt herself ache for him but she felt no urge to rush him. Harry always liked to take his time. He used his free hand to slide down to her hip gently squeezing the flesh there. 
He started to scatter his kisses down along her jaw and nipped her ear. She sighed softly letting a moan slip in contentment. Her hands moved to his hair softly massaging his head. 
His kisses travelled further down to her neck and he sucked harshly against her nipping the soft skin, she hissed in pleasure and he licked back over the spot to soothe her. Her pretty sighs of contentment made him smile against her skin.
His lips grazed further down across her chest and he could hear the pounding of her heart. 
“Are y’nervous, Bun?” He asked, eyes looking up to meet hers.
She looked down at him. “A little but, I don’t need to be do I?”
“No, it’s just me.”
She smiled, moving a curl away from his forehead, “Just Harry.”
“Exactly, just me. But you know that if you wanna stop at any time you tell me. Or if it hurts, or for any reason just say it and I’ll stop. We can just cuddle, I won’t mind.” He replied. 
“I know, I will.” She said.
“Good girl.” He kissed her heaving chest as he moved further down lapping her nipple up into his mouth.
She squirmed her hips against the thigh that rested between her legs, he could feel how wet she was against his bare skin. “Ah,” She cried softly.
His free hand massaged the tit that wasn’t in his mouth softly. Her back arched into his touch. “Oh, Harry, you are so good at that. Fuck.”
He chuckled lightly moving back up to her face. “You ready?”
She nodded. “Mhmm.” 
He kissed her forehead in response, pulling off her.
“Where are you going?” She grabbed his arms. 
“To get a condom.”
“No, it’s okay,”
“Are you sure?”
“Yes.” 
He felt his prick twitch at her words.
“Okay.”
Her legs wrapped around his waist and he moved his free hand down to grab ahold of himself. She felt the head of his cock pulsating against her sensitive clit. “M’ gonna go slow, okay?”
She nodded, her chest heaving into his. “Mmkay.” She breathed.
He dragged the tip down to her weeping hole, hissing at the contact of it.
“You okay?” She asked.
He pressed his forehead into hers. “Yeah, you?”
She nodded. 
That was enough reassurance for him to start to slip inside, his cock was so heavy in need. Even though he had gotten her more comfortable and stretched for him with his fingers it still stung as he pushed inside. 
Only the head of him was inside and she already felt so stretched. 
“S’big.” She muttered.
He was going very slowly, his eyes trained on her face, and the pinched expression she was sporting. Worried that it was too painful. Knowing he was rather large. 
He grabbed her hand and squeezed it, and she squeezed back. “Keep going, please.” She said.
He nodded in reply, slowly pushing his hips further. She sighed in discomfort, feeling the veins of him against her. She clenched and he hissed. Pushing further, he felt his cock splitting her open.
He noticed her eyes were glassy and a tear slipped from her eye as she bit her lip.
“Do you want me to stop?” He asked rushedly. 
She shook her head. “No, keep going, just stings a bit.” She tried to explain. 
“Are you sure?”
She nodded, “Mhm.”
He rocked forward and he felt him slip into her further. “M’nearly there, Love,” He soothed, kissing her temple.
When he rutted one final thrust his balls pressed against her ass. They both whimpered at the contact. 
Her eyes were dilated as she felt completely full of him. “Shit, Harry.” Her legs were wrapped around his lower back holding him close. 
“You’re so tight, fuck me,” He whined. She was clenching rythmically around his throbbing prick.
“You can move,” She knew that soon the pain would become pleasure, it would melt away soon, it was already beginning too.
He buried his face in the side of her neck, smelling her perfume and natural scent as he moans grew louder muffled by her shoulder. His thrusts began shallow and slow and she whined loudly. Her arms wrapped around the expanse of his back and she scratched along his shoulderblades.
He hissed at the pain, loving the sting.
“Harry,” She cried out when he started to speed up into her, ramming against her sensitive spongey spot that made her lose her mind, he was the only one who could reach that deep inside of her. She felt him all the way in her stomach. She was already sensitive from her previous orgasm and was keening at the feeling of his slow needy rutting.
He whined at the feel of her clamping down on him. “Fuck, Y/n.”
The pain had subsided to pleasure, the sting hardly noticeable now. She squeezed his shoulder, “Feels good, H.”
He started to speed up now, pounding into her at a ruthless speeed. “Shit, Baby, feel s’good on m’cock.”
He was needily moving into her, as his head remained buried by her neck breathing in the delicious sent of her. It had been a long time since he’d had sex and since he had only been with Y/n for these few months now he’d only had blowies or handjobs, which were great don’t get him wrong, but nothing and I mean nothing compared to her wet tight pussy. God, he’d dreamed of it. Nights and nights he’d lay awake dreaming of it. Dreamed of burying himself in there deeply, and the little sounds it would make.
He knew the right thing to do was to wait, and he was so glad he did. But it meant he was worried he might cum inside her already, the tension building all this time meant he was so pent up. He just wanted to release all his sexual frustrations from these past few months. She was so perfect against his cock, like it was made to wrap around him. 
“Like this pussy was made for me.” He rambled.
“I can feel you in my tummy, H.” She whined shutting her eyes, and he pulled up from her should moving his hand to press onto the now bulging flesh of her tummy. With each pump he felt her clench against his prick and saw the faint bulge of his cock. He could feel himself with each thrust, as they both moaned.
He moved that hand from her tummy down lower to her swollen clit that was begging for attention. Rubbing harsh circles and her hips twitched. “Oh god, Harry,”
He wanted to feel her cum on his cock, he was desprate for the feeling, he could already tell she was getting closer to the brink from the stimulation on her puffy senstive clit and his thick prick pounding into her. The clamping of her pussy was growing irregular and when his thrusts went particularly deep inside of her, her eyes rolled back.
She felt euphoric, this white blistering hot feeling was shooting through her from head to toe. 
She was honestly surprised how good he made her feel, when she was younger and all her friends were losing their virginities they told her it hurt and that it was awkward. Or that they didn’t cum, and there was no foreplay. She had expected that Harry would know what he was doing, but even that didn’t live up to this moment. She had also known that it may not be as pleasurable until later on but she was feeling like she was on cloud fucking nine.
“You’re so pretty, such a pretty little thing.” He mumbled as he placed some kisses down her neck and along her collarbone.
She mewled her back arching into him. “Oh, fuck,” she whispered with a slight disbeleif in her eyes, “think you’re gonna make me cum, Baby.” 
He watched her with a sultry grin, as her eyes screwed shut and the hands that were on his back started to scratch along the tan flesh once again much sharper. “Don’t stop,” She panted. 
“Such a good girl f’me. Y’gonna come on my cock?” He asked teasingly, with a pant.
She could only whine in response, biting her lip at the intensity. 
“Atta’ girl. Be a good girl and cum on m’cock.” He praised. 
She started to shake, the feeling of his fingers still on her clit was pushing her to her orgasm. Her tummy clenched and she couldn’t contain her hips from squirming up into his. This intense wave of bliss rushed through her as waves of pleasure melted from her chest to her stomach all the way down to her throbbing pussy that was wrapped around him. 
Her heart was thumping in her chest as her entire body twitched in delight and climax. His prick never stopped it's pounding as he let her orgasm ride out. It was longer than the first one and like nothing she had ever felt before. She’d only dreamt of this kind of pleasure and usually Harry was the one giving it too her. She felt like it was an out of body experience, her head became lightheaded and stars appeared in her vision. She hadn’t even heard her self crying out, until she came back too. 
He slowed down to allow her a moment to catch her breath. Her pussy felt so senstive that even these more gentle and tame strokes had her basically sobbing with pleasure. 
“I’m close, Sweet girl,” He hissed and he began to speed up once more now his thrusts were sloppy and an uneven rhythm. Her orgasm had made him lose any last bit of control he had.
She could barely speak she was so spent. “Please,” She didn’t know what exactly she was begging for.
He pushed his lips into hers and trapped her in a kiss, her hands found their way into his thick hair which was coated in a light dampness from sweat. She moaned against them and he was whimpering into her swollen lips. He pulled his lips off hers for a moment as he whimpered a desprate, “Gonna’ cum.”
She managed to breath out a soft, “Cum for me Harry,”
The delicacy of her voice made him lose it and he felt his cock twitch in release, hot spurts of his cum shot up inside her and she felt him fill her up completely. He whimpered the most despratelty she’d ever heard and his head fell into her neck. “Fuck,” He breathed. 
Her pussy was still clenched around him tightly. “That was…wow.”
She giggled. “That was perfect.”
He lifted up from her shoulder and captured her lips into a kiss. It was long and tender and much softer than then the urgent act they’d just comitted. He itched to say it, those three words, but all that came out was. 
“You’re gorgeous, Y/n.”
“Thank you, Harry,”
He kissed her forehead. “Come on, let's clean you up.”
if you enjoyed please follow me to see the next parts coming soon ily 🫶 feel free to check out my masterlist xxx & feel free to request me too!!
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elliessession · 1 month
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"I need you right now."
an: IM SO SORRY IVE BEEN BUSY BECAUSE OF SCHOOL UGHHH, ANYWAYS HERE YALL GOO💗 I HOPE YALL LIKE THIS! And ofc as alwayss this one shot is inspired by "Coming Down" by the weeknd!
summary: you were done doing the chores in your apartment and ellie is still not home, shes at work but you decided to text her some things that you know would drive her crazy and immediately regret it.
-> smut! d!ellie, s!reader, pet names: princess, baby, good girl, slight degrading!, cursing! And i guess thats all?
𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟𓆝 𓆟 𓆞
After hours of cleaning your apartment you're finally done with everything. 'The bedroom? Clean! The dishes? Yep already cleaned, and im pretty sure i already vacuumed the whole apartment' you thought to yourself. Now theres nothing to do. You're on your school break right now and you've already did all the things you're supposed to do.
You tried to watch a movie which never really entertained you. You've also tried this tiktok trends just to really get out of your boredom, yet nothing really helped. You miss ellie, you miss being in her arms. "Yes! Why did i not think of this earlier!' you screamed getting your phone and plopping on your bed and opening your phone to text ellie.
-----------
me: els? When are you coming homeee, imyy! :(
no reponse.
"awe, she's probably busy" you said in a upset tone, really missing ellie closing your phone, then getting a 'bright idea' that is not so bright. 'why not send risky texts to ellie? She probably wouldn't even read it since shes at work, then ill probably just remove my text when her break is near'you thought to yourself
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me: els, fuckkk i need you right now baby.
no response.
You giggled at the text you sent knowing she wont really read it.But the thought of her actually reading your texts and knowing what can happen. "Err.. lets go send another one!" You said.
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me: els, baby please i really need you right now.
me: els, please. I miss you, can you text me back baby please. Fuck i need you so baddd
me: ;)
typing..
"holy shit!, Shit she saw it, im doomed for fucks sake" you say with a slight panic in your voice.
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els💞: hey baby, missed me that much hm?
me: fuck yes i do.
"shit, just go with it lets just end what i have started" you say to yourself.
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els💞: baby yk you're really turning me on rn.
me: oh? thats a good thing then.
els💞: babe stop.
me: whyy? do you not like it when im bold hm?
els💞: fuck this.
me: hm? Im all alone baby. I need you.
read.
"shit is it her break right now?" You asked yourself looking at the time in your phone "3:58pm" "its not her break yet, her breaks are in 4pm since i know shes in her night shift right now." you asked your self.
what do you not know is ellie actually left early to buy you gifts, she was buying you your favorite food at the time you texted her.
------------
*ringing*
els💞: pick up your phone.
read.
"shit im in trouble" you say to yourself picking up the phone.
—–—–—–—–
"els?"
"im on my way home."
"d-dont you have work?"
"shit, you'll understand later baby."
"what do you mean?"
"your messages. Shit you've been driving me crazy."
*silence*
"wheres your boldness now? Hm?"
"fuck you els."
"you'll be fucking me later princess dont worry."
"ugh i hate you."
"pretty sure you dont baby"
*hangs up*
you can imagine ellies stupid smirk on her face, knowing you're literally folder right now.
A few minutes later your door opened and guess whos there. Ellie, you tried to play it cool like you didn't just drive your girlfriend crazy. "Heyy baby! I missed you!" You hugged her, ellie well.. was not playing with you. She took off her shoe and placed the things she bought for you and kissed you.
"you dont know how much you.. fuck youre driving me crazy all day."
ellies kiss deepen as her hands moves up and down from your shoulder to your waist, you tried your best not to moan from her touch.
a moment after there you guys were. Your laying at the bed and ellies there, between your legs..
"f-fuck.. els.."
and there she was. Coming down, right now.
infront of you.
"you're such a slut for me baby. I love it."
you closed your legs as she said this
"no need to be shy now princess, be a good girl for me hm? Show me your boldness."
"els please.. just.. fuck me please."
—————
"eat up now baby"
"els i.. im tired okay"
"shh, you were begging me for more earlier." She laughs
"ugh i hate you so much."
"thats not what you were saying earlier when i made you cum, hm?"
"shuuutttt upp"
-----------------------------
an: ANDD TADAAA I HOPE U GUYS LIKED THISS💗 AND AS ALWAYSS SORRY FOR MY BAD GRAMMARR, ENGLISH IS NOT MY FIRST LANGUAGEEE, YOU GUYS CAN ALWAYS CORRECT ME THO!💗
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kunikame · 7 months
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the moon and her stars. - lyney
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warnings : lyney has zero rizz (clickbait), i made astral references again im not sorry guys, not quite love at first sight but more the steps made towards it, gender neutral, fluff
w/c : 940
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the saying "eyes are the window to one's soul" is, in lyneys humble opinion, about as true as it can get.
he would know.
while he performs his magic tricks, while he takes a stroll down the streets of fontaine– whatever leisurely activity you choose, he does it while staring people directly in the eyes.
of course he doesn't stare at one person the whole time, his own lavender gaze flies from one person to another sporadically, yet he never fails to discern the emotions hidden behind them.
are they happy? sad? having a good day? a bad one, perhaps? tired? surprised? excited?
he knows.
he watches childrens eyes light up with joy when he pulls their card out of his hat– he observes the couple arguing a few steps away, notices when the brunette's eyes shift from pure sadness to betrayal.
he sees.
which is why he also notices when someone lacks these qualities. if there is no joy, there is no shine– no life behind a person's eyes.
he wonders why your eyes seem so empty when your smile feels genuine.
perhaps you're like him, hiding burdens you desperately wish would forever stay locked up, yet you yearn for a companion to share your pain.
he has his siblings, but who do you have?
lyney approaches you one time (be it out of sheer fascination or simply seeking a change of pace, he's not quite sure) after an impromptu show he put on for some kids in the middle of the street with a singular white rose in his possession.
"hello there, you seem to be not quite enjoying the show tonight. may the great magician lyney be of any service, perhaps?"
he removes his hat with a flourish and bows, holding out the rose as an offering to you.
you lift your gaze from the book you were reading, surprised he took notice of your presence. upon noticing the rose a pleased hum escapes you, and lyney notices a fragment of what one might call 'entertainment' behind your gaze.
"did you know white roses symbolize young love and eternal loyalty, sir lyney? was your approach made with such intentions to be conveyed on this starry night?"
your tone is teasing and amused, and he is well aware of it, but whatever mirth you might be feeling doesn't quite reach your eyes, and so with a snap of his fingers and an elegant shake of the rose, he produces 8 more of them in an unarranged bouquet he hopes you will accept.
"not quite, i'm afraid. i was more so referring  to the symbolization of new beginnings, but if you so prefer i would not at all mind changing the meaning. or the color, if you wish," he says, brushing his hand over the roses, which have now turned a darker orange.
"'fascination', i see," you hum, "interesting choice. is there a reason for it?" you have now discarded your book entirely, giving the blond all your attention, as if hanging onto each word he says, yet seemingly not quite caring about any of them either. it confused lyney, but it fascinated him even more.
"are you aware of what people say about eyes?" you nod, inclining your head slightly, curiosity piqued, "they are the window to the soul. i've found that claim to be truthful until the day i first met eyes with you."
"is this your attempt at wooing me, sir lyney? i regret having to inform you it's not quite working."
"not yet, no. i simply wished to compliment you. your eyes are one of, if not the most beautiful i've ever seen. but, if i may be so bold as to ask, why must you suppress your emotions from being seen in them?"
your eyes flicker away momentarily and lyney pauses. perhaps he might lose this battle tonight.
"i do not wish for them to be perceived by none other than myself. i believe it's better– nobody can use my emotions against me this way."
"why would anyone do such a thing?"
your eyes meet his then, and the world stops. everyone around him disappears and suddenly it's just you and him in this bubble universe you've created– or perhaps you haven't created it, it was simply made for you. you are the center of it and lyney has to fight to find his place (he chooses the one that's closest to the sun– to you). may he crash and burn if he has to, if the universe decides he's meant to, he simply wishes to be as close as you let him. 
if the eyes are the window to the soul– or to put it differently– to the heart, then lyney is certain what you see in his is the adoration he holds for you. even though he doesn't quite know you yet, you fascinate him to no end and he will not stop at the ends of the universe– he will go further and further, as far as his legs carry him, to know everything about you.
he has come to agreement with these feelings of his, they are the reason he chose to approach you in the first place.
he is, however, rendered speechless when your eyes suddenly seem filled with an affection and longing he can't say he's been looked at with before.
"you tell me, sir lyney. would you do such a thing?"
you smile at him then and may the god of justice strike him down where he stands lest his words are lies, but you put the moon and all her stars to shame.
"to you? never."
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minicoffee00 · 7 months
Text
Fast Changes - Part 5 Azriel x Reader
Plot: You are Feyre’s younger twin and get sent into the Cauldron with your sisters coming out as high fae. What happens on this journey
Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 🌶️
Warnings: SMUT, wingplay, fingering, sex
After accepting the bond, Azriel had taken Y/N back to his room, she asked to stay with him that night. She for the first time in months didn't feel alone.
She was only to blame for that feeling, where she had distanced herself from everyone but the Shadowsinger, but in that mind of her's it was the only way to keep the silence.
"Are you alright" he asks, she'd been in the bathroom for a concerning amount of time and he was starting to worry if she was regretting her actions from earlier. He didn't deserve this amazing female that was sat on the bed next to him.
"Yes, I'm just not sure what to wear. As your mate I expect you want me to look pleasant in bed, so im debating what to wear" she answers. He genuinly cant beleive her, this of all things is what was stressing her out.
"Sweetheart you wear what you feel comfotable in. I will always want to ravish you, morning noon, and night. In anything you wear that wont change my feeling for you" he smiles, she exists in his shirt, a black one that swamped her smaller frame.
"Come, lets go to sleep" he gestures for her to get into bed with him, he was currently laying on his back under the covers, with the side she was supposed to sleep on pulled up to let her in.
She slowly climbed in next to him, she was in a sat position noticing his wings were across where she was supposed to sleep. She went to reach out to help him move it so she didn't crush it.
"Don't touch them just yet, they are very sensitive and so freshly after the mate bond I don't know how I'll react. I don't want to push you" he offers still holding her wrist.
"Erm, how am i meant to sleep? I don't want to hurt you" she mutters looking for him to his wing.
"They are strong, you wont hurt them, i want to curl them around you. Think of it as my way of making sure your all safe while we sleep" he smiles at her, he grabs bother her upper arms, pulling her down to lean back on him.
She lays down, culring herself into his side as his left wing wraps around her and pulls her closer into him. She breathed in his sent falling into a deep slumber immedleity.
Only a few hours later, while it was still dark did she wake up, drenched in her own sweat, her heart beating furiously. Her breathing was laboured thinking of what she had just seen in the nightmare that plagued her mind.
Azriel was up in an instant rubbing across her back comfortingly.
"What happened?" he asked softly.
"I saw myself be taken by Beron, the High Lord in the Autumn Court, and he made me help him hurt the brothers" she gasped out remembering the burnt ginger hair on the older fae's head.
"Which brothers?" Azriel asked.
"Eris, the one Mor fears and Lucien my sisters mate. He wanted me to make them angry and hurt each other. And then Hellion found me and claimed i was a child of Day. He took me and i was bound to his court and i never saw you again" she cried into him, hugging him tightly as if someone was about to take her away from him.
"It's okay, my love. Look at me" he says, he sits up leaning over the top of her, twirling her hair placing delicate kisses all over the light and delicate face below him.
"I wont let anyone take you. You were born on the winter solstice, just like your sister. The longest night of the year? And you think you belong to the day court? What utter nonsense" he laugh, looking over her. She leans up to place a kiss on his lips. He kisses back, his hand coming up to rest one on her neck and the other on her cheek.
"Would i be more secure here if you claimed me?" She asks.
"I don't claim you love, the mate bond makes us equals" he smiles, and you lean up kissing him.
"I want you to make me yours, in every respect Azriel. This is my choice and if you want me, i want all of you too" she smiles
“Are you sure, I know what you experienced with Hybern and I -“ he starts but is cut off by her finger pressing down onto his luscious pink lips.
“What Hybern did to me, I did to protect my sisters, my family. I regret none of it, as much as I hated it and felt disgusted with myself everyday I remembered that I was doing it for Elain, for Nesta. This is what I want Azriel. I want to prove to you, how much I love you” she explains to him.
“You could never touch me in that way for our entire history and i still know you’d walk the mountains for me because just your eyes and your touch shows me how much you truly care. You are a gem in this world and I don’t intend on ever sharing you or leaving you to anyone else. We are equals” he says pulling her in and placing his forehead against hers, pulling on that bond.
“You are in control tonight, you tell me what you want, okay love? I won’t do anything unless you tell me” He admits, and as her breath hitches he finally smells a smell that he’s been waiting since he accepted the food from you at dinner.
“You smell Devine” he says nipping towards her neck, dragging a long sniff his bridged nose trailing up across her jaw to where her lips are. She leans up pulling them into a kiss, her hands start to fumble around with his sleeping pants. They were a loose waist band unlike the tight Illyrian leathers she normally saw him in.
Her hand swept under the waistband and into his undershorts almost too easily. Her hand grasped round his weighty length, a small startled gasp coming from the both of them.
Azriel hadn’t expected his mate to be so forward, he could tell from the hunger in her eyes she would be his absolute undoing, but in these moments he didn’t care. The feeling of her hand grasping tightly around his cock was too good.
Obviously the male had been with other women, and yes he had managed to find pleasure out of it, but this… oh was this so very different. He was already on the verge of release at her mere touch with the amount of hold and affect she had on him.
Her hand slowly starts to run up and down the length, her thumb occasionally rubbing over the tip and slit at the end before running back down along the prominent vain that was there.
“F-fuck” he moans his head dipping down struggling to hold his weight up above her.
“You can touch me too Az” she breaths, she takes her hand out and a whine escapes him as the band snaps down against his lower v-line.
“Tell me where I can” he grunts pulling off his pants leaving him bear. He watches as she pulls his black top that she had borrowed up over her head, leaving her only in her underwear. Small panties cover what he could only describe as his next five course meal from the finest restaurant along the Sidra.
“You can maybe start here” she says taking his hands and placing them over her large bear breasts that he had wanted to lay his head between on many occasions, and it had almost been painful to see them and no stuff him gave between the gap they had that was her cleavage.
“And then run them down to here” she says making his hands trail down her body, her head lifted back slightly revelling in the feeling of his scarred skin run perfectly across hers.
“And finally they can end up, right here” she all but whispers with a slight gasp as she cups his hand over her slight mound. He takes this as a good sign and through the fabric of her panties he could feel that she was already soaking.
“Your already so wet for me hunny” he groans, pushing the fabric to the side before circling around her most sensitive area. He used his thumb in expert motion making her hips starts to do what he thought was cute little thrusts forward.
He eventually took pity on the sounds and begging look she gave him for me and entered two fingers into her. She helped him, settle them into her more by practically sitting on them.
“Darling your going to have to just lean back a little, I don’t want to break my hand” he chuckles, starting a more fluid movement when she leant back. In this position she had perfect access to his member.
“Your so pretty and so perfect my love”
She took it into her small hand rubbing up and down like she had before and his hips stutter to help her.
“You know how to make a man cave at his knees” he grunts.
“Only you Azriel” she gasps.
They stated to revel in each others pleasure, they could both feel themselves nearing but it wasn’t until Y/N mistakingly moved her free hand, which in her defence was aimed to come up to his neck and into his hair brushed along the inner bit of his wing was he whimpering and moaning her name with a gasp before without any control released onto her hand, thighs and stomach.
“Gnhhh fuck”
He don’t think he’d ever come that, hard quickly or that much before. Even through his shock he kept up his pace with his fingers bringing his mate to her own release. It was an eye opening experience watching her hands lay back palm up on the pillows neck to her head, which was also twisting from side to side in so much pleasure it was almost painful.
And don’t get Azriel started on her voice or face as she reached her high. He believed that it would be ingrained in his memory until his last breath.
“Okay, now it’s all up to you love” he says flipping them over so that she was on top, she was currently straddling over his waist. His already hard cock pressing against her stomach.
She potions herself so that he was helping him line up with her entrance. He helped her sink down, as as they bottomed out into her, they both let out a sigh. The bond was going wild, as if you finally connected those last two pieces of a jigsaw puzzle and it fits so perfectly that it completes the image.
“Azriel” she groans as she tries to lift herself up but fails immediately, he was massive his wing span definitely accounting for other things…. So it was taking her a while to get used to the full feeling.
“Your so warm, I just want to stay like this with you for a little while” so they did, and the hug she enveloped him in, pulling him in impossibly deeper had him groaning and trying to slam himself up into her.
He was now content with the hug, her hands were currently in his hair playing with it, but they slowly started to reach down, to his shoulder baldes. She started to massage out the large notes forming in the tight Illyrian’s shoulders until she went down to where his wings met the bone in his back and he shuddered, the largest and almost embarrassed moan comes from him as she ran her hand from there along the expanse, a wet warmth filling her up inside.
“Azriel did you just” she starts but he groans knowing exactly what happened.
“I - it just felt so good” he nuzzled into her chest, starting to suck on one of her nipples making her push her check may up closer to him.
She kept playing with the interior of his wings preening them here and there, taking of small little skin grafts and rubbing away any discolouration. All of this made him hard again in less than a minute. He started to move up against his mate, helping her with the movements his hands having a strong grip on her hips helping her move up and down.
“Your perfect. I don’t deserve you or you love” he says as she starts to kiss over every accessible bit of his body to her lips which was mainly just his face. But she didn’t leave one part of that pretty face of his untouched. Her hands ran up and down his arms, feeling the strong muscles ripple across in waves making her feel so safe and loved.
Azriel felt so lucky to be feeling this amount of connection and love from someone, it was overwhelming to the point tears started to come from his eyes.
“Gods knows where I’d be I’d I hadn’t found you, your the reason I kept fighting so hard, and while I will continue too, for you, everything I do is for you, my love, my mate, my sun, and my stars and my moon”he groans, at this point he was doing all the work slamming himself up into her in a steady rhythm that had her leaning her full chest onto him, letting him take her.
“Azriel” she squeals as he quickens his pace and she feels that coil tighten in her stomach.
“I’m so close baby, you have to wait for me” he moans, she reaches to the dip in his back between his wings lightly pushing down making him surge forward and release into her for the second time tonight. He release follows shortly after, leaning against him.
“Let’s just stay like this for a while” he yawns pulling her down with him as he fully lays down, she lays on top of him, cock still inside her as he wraps his wings around her comfortingly.
“Azriel, I - I love you”
“I’ve loved you since I saw you up in the tree, back at your estate” he grins placing a kiss on her forehead, her sleepy eyes looking up to him.
“But, I was human”
“I could still tell, there was something that drew me and my shadows to you. That’s why I came out to find you” he says, his words slowed and he was about to fall asleep just as he heard her mumble out something.
“What I thought we’re fast changes that I couldn’t keep up with really became my forever and always” she says kissing his chest before falling into a slumber of her own.
TAGLIST:
@cat-or-kitten
@sstrohma
@horneybeach1
@its-sam-allgood
@starryhiraeth
@xcastawayherosx
@glitterypirateduck
@azriels-mate123
@mavropouloupanagiota
A/N:
Finally some smut for you lovely lot, I love writing and I’m actually writing both a romance novel and a romantasy myself right now which I hope to publish at some point!
What did you think of this chapter! Does the series need some other parts or do you think this is a good end to my first Azriel series? I Intend to make a longer one soon, but uni struggles are real!
Lemme know if you want a part 6!
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ugly-pickle · 3 months
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Good morning, Pickle. My second request for the day. Please kindly consider this angsty Gorou request: Gorou can only watch as you exchange nuptial cups with Heizou. He know he has no right to stop the wedding, not when he was the one who broke up with you to woo Kokomi, only to find out later that she was only using him to get her parents off her back about her being single.
Please also kindly take as long as you need with this request; I have no qualms in waiting. Furthermore, by no means feel obligated to prioritize this request over your other requests.
regret ☆ gorou
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CHARACTERS: gorou x reader
SYNOPSIS: gorou dumps you for kokomi (っ- ‸ - ς)
GENRE: angst 🦢
W/C: 0.8k
T/W: cussing, breaking up, cheating (if there’s any i missed let me know!)
A/N: bro i hate exams (˚ ˃̣̣̥⌓˂̣̣̥ ) my next one will also probably take eons to complete….
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“WHAT THE FUCK GOROU.”
SMACK
you touch the now red mark on your face. it stings, but the ache in your heart is worse. “never talk about kokomi like that again,” gorou says with a stern tone. “tch, YOUR kokomi? i have never seen her look at you for more than 2 seconds outside of a meeting.” youre now pissed off due to gorou’s stupidity, but you cant help but feel a bit jealous, well, kokomi did just steal your lover’s heart with just a snap of her fingers.
gorou’s tail looks stiff, you notice that he does that when hes uncomfortable or angry, you take note of this. you might regret what youre going to say, but a river cannot stop flowing just because of a small inconvenience. you shall see where the future takes you. “if i upset you that much then i’ll leave. goodbye gorou,” you want to cry but your dignity tells you not to; you grab your wallet and head out the door.
before you completely close the door, you can hear a whimper, and it’s not yours.
it’s sunny outside, youre not sure if you should be grateful that theres no rain to make you feel worse, or if you should feel bad that the rest of inazuma is having a great time without you. although, no matter how clear the day was, you still manage to bump into someone.
“y/n? oh my archons, it is you! how have you been?” says the mysterious voice. “heizou?” tears are finally dripping down.
you slightly grip the cups in your hands, youre so excited that youre scared that the sake might spill. the moment slips by like a flash and youre already taking your last sip. you look up to see your husband, hes grinning ear to ear and so are you.
heizou looks so lovely when hes happy, but now you can see all of his emotions, whether if hes happy, sad, jealous, angry, disgusted, confused, you can see all of it and only you.
you look into the crowd, all of your friends and family are there, heizou’s side as well. theyre happy for you.
thats when you see gorou.
beside him was Sangonomiya Kokomi, Divine Priestess of Watatsumi Island, what a mouthful, not to mention how bitter the title tasted in your mouth. gorou’s tail was stiff, you wonder why; his eyes were also glistening, such pretty eyes shouldnt cry….
WAITWAITWAIT
nononono, youre literally having your wedding ceremony right now, what are you thinking?…
your wedding ceremony has ended, you and heizou are now officially married.
gorou’s perspective:
“gorou? are you okay?” kokomi asks, “u-uhm yea, im fine,” gorou stutters a bit. what if he was the one up there with you. what if he was up there exchanging nuptial cups with you.
“hey kokomi?” gorou asks, “yes gorou?” kokomi responds, “im gonna get some fresh air, i’ll be right back,” kokomi nods her head, gorou presses a kiss on her forehead then exits.
he feels guilty. he kissed kokomi while thinking about you, no, he thought about you every waking second and you even appeared in his dreams. a few tears roll down his eyes. is he happy for you or jealous of heizou? all of these emotions swirling around him, and he cant tell which one hes feeling.
he feels a hand in his shoulder. he jumps, hes a bit startled, it’s you…
you look so lovely, the fabric, the design, the jewels, and just the everything made you look heavenly. he picks up a scent that he always longed for, it was yours, he just never realized it.
“were you crying gorou?…” he feels more tears coming up, did he miss you that much?
“congratulations y/n, uhm… we ended on a bad note, look i just wanna say that ‘m sorry.” a small smile appears on your face, “apology accepted, that was the past, lets focus on the present,” you gently squeeze gorou’s hand. “lets catch up some other time, yea?” you said, “y-yea,” and with that you disappeared. he feels empty.
“there you are!” kokomi’s voice rings through his ears. “m-my love!” gorou says, becoming stiff again, “look gorou, we need to talk,” her words feel stiff, uncomfortable even. “of course! anything! what do you need to talk about?” gorou asks.
“…lets split up gorou.”
….
“eh?” hes dumbfounded. “lets break up,” nonono this cant be happening, “why?… i thought you were happy, were you not?” gorou’s life was already falling apart, this was just the breaking point. “look, gorou, i have strict parents that expect me to produce… offspring, i would like to label this event ‘traumatic’ so they’ll stop bothering me for the time being. my condolences.”
why bother anymore?
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NOTE FOR SAILORSTAR9: i literally had no idea what nuptial cups were before this (´∇`'')
TAGLIST: @sailorstar9
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