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vulpes-incendium · 3 years

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I made this long time ago, but I thought it's a good time to share it here for @aphasiaweek!

I chose 《Hoi Sam☆Nice Guy》over 《Maji Kandou☆Hong Kong Night》because there are more stuff about HK in it. So let's see if the lyrics are accurate in a native's point of view!

Spoiler alert: it's very accurate

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Hoi Sam = Happy (in Cantonese)

Guy = sounds like street in Cantonese (gaai1)

“Yooooo, so since there’s a song… while I’m at it I kinda put some effort into my costume… I think I’ve got like, serious swag Pardon? You can’t see me…for real? Woah!!!!”

FASHION: yes, HKers love to be trendy, always want to be on top trends! Trends come and go very very quickly, it's seriously really hard to follow trends in HK.

MIXING ENGLISH WITH CANTONESE: yup, we do that a lot, we almost couldn't finish a sentence without English, some words just sound "uncool" in Chinese lol (it’s always about being cool in HK lol), but we don't really say “pardon” unless we are speaking English

Sup-sup-sup-sup-sup-super mobile (snap snap) It’s my hobby to take pics and collect them (I guess) Not gonna lie, everyone’s got a mobile phone, penetration rate (highest in the world) Yeah! If you’re going sightseeing then Nathan Road! (Fuu~!)

TAKING PICS WITH SMARTPHONE: Aph HK loves taking (embarrassing) photos (of China lol), but in real life HKers do love taking pictures, or videos too (it's dangerous if you misbehave, people would film you and post on Youtube or Facebook)

MOBILE PHONE PENETRATION RATE: I couldn't find data for HK, but I think I heard on average, each HKer carries at least 2 cellphones! So this could be true!

NATHAN ROAD: It's the longest street in HK and there's so many things, good food, good shopping places and yup sightseeing! (A lot of our streets are named after the Governors during the colonial time, this street is named after Sir Matthew Nathan for example)

Welcome this makes me kinda happy (Check it out!) Learned this from England - tea in the afternoon (high tea) Welcome, this is kinda fun (Shake it up!) Yum cha, Hong Kong milk tea, cha-cha Nice culture (frivolous)!

AFTERNOON TEA: Yes, it's still a tradition for us to have tea time, we call it 3:15, workplaces would have tea breaks, restaurants do tea time menu during 2-5pm, it's really cool and cheap! We usually drink HK milk tea (evolved from British milk tea) during tea time and there are so many delicious snacks like French toast, pineapple bun and of course egg tart!

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YUM CHA: It literally means “drink tea”, but Chinese tea this time. It's a tradition for us to go Yum Cha every Sunday with our family! Dim sum is part of Yum Cha! We just eat and catch up with each others for HOURS!

Oh. My. God. “LOHAS LOHAS” Oh. My. Mind. “Gonna take a pic~” Take away “Is this delivery service for real?” Like, seriously, even if it’s way out of the way, no problem man

LOHAS: I didn't know what this refers to for a long time, I finally found the answer. This refers to LOHAS park, an eco-friendly residential area newly built few years ago. But what's so special about it? Is it famous in Japan?!

DELIVERY SERVICE: Well delivery service in Asia are generally good anyway, but I guess we are good and fast?! (but I think Korea too!)

Super Feeling unlucky? If it’s getting to you, go villain hitting at Ngo Keng Kiu A medium will perform an exorcism, and hit a paper doll with a shoe For fortune telling, go draw fortune sticks, or get a divine answer by throwing moon blocks at the temples… at Wong Tai Sin, light the fire of your incense! If you’re feeling tired, maybe you can give Feng Shui a try or something? A spiritual site in Lantau Island The Wisdom Path…is super Awesome for meditation, but there aren’t any toilets, so watch out Gold fish, bring me luck! (In money!)

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NGO KENG KIU: Generally HKers are not THAT superstitious, but the culture still lives within us. I have never known anyone who did the villain hitting, but it's still quite a thing (and a great tourist spot). It's mainly for people who backstab you (we call them "small people" siu yan), but I guess evil spirit too.

WONG TAI SIN: Again, it's more for older generation who are still a bit superstitious. People like to go to Wong Tai Sin Temple during Lunar New Year to wish for luck in the new year. It's still quite popular!

See I told you we have natural landscape (source)

WISDOM PATH: I've never been there lol. Apparently it's a "path lined with 38 wooden monuments inscribed with the Heart Sutra prayer". In general, HK has a lot of nice hiking trail, our landscape is actually amazing, it's just we focus too much on making money...

P-Pe-Pe-Pearl of the Orient is me! (I guess?) Got completely wasted? Ended up in a dress (totes sick) Not gonna lie, population density is highest in the world in Ap Lei Chau Yeah! If you’re going sightseeing then Hong Kong Island! (Yeah~!!)

PEARL OF THE ORIENT: It's the nickname of HK, the Philippines is Pearl of the Orient SEAS

(Ending up in a dress refers to this comic, thanks parallel France!)

POPULATION DENSITY: Yea, that's what we are famous for really, small place lots of people (HK is a very hilly city, surprise, surprise), we have the most expensive estate price in the world 🤦‍♀️, not sure if Ap Lei Chau is particularly population-densed, but the whole HK is like that!

Good luck in everything this makes me kinda happy (Check it out!) Learned this from England - how to be a gentleman (ladies first) I wish you good health, this is kinda fun (Shake it up!) Typhoon, Kung Fu, WA-TAHH Supplements, Chinese herbal medicine (healthy~!)

LUCK: The newer generations are less superstitious now, but luck is still kind of important for us? It's more like a tradition than a belief, we do them just in case (like Feng Shui).

TYPHOON: As a coastal city, we get typhoons a lot in summer, but they are not as strong in comparison to the Philippines or Indonesia.

KUNG FU: We are known for our Kung Fu films, as the actors are all trained martial artists! Bruce Lee (WA-TAH was his catchphrase), Jackie Chan and Donnie Yen are great examples! Because of the wars and Cultural Revolution, many people fled China to HK, resulting the influx of high quality martial artists (eg. Ip Man).

HERBAL MEDICINE: As western as we are, we still believe in Chinese Medicine, but more in a preventative way.

Oh. My. God. “Air conditioning in full blast!” Oh. My. Mind. “That’s not eco-friendly…” Oh well “The air will become cleaner, I think?” Seriously a Mistake, but, no problem man

STRONG AIR-CONDITIONING: This line had me laugh die (Imao in Cantonese)! It's so accurate! You can catch a cold from the airconditioning in HK! And that's why we always carry a jacket even in summer! It's not very eco-friendly and our government is trying resolve that.

AIR POLLUTION: Yes we have smog (smoke + fog), it is becoming quite the problem really. The root of the problem is that Shenzhen, the city next to HK, is developing rapidly and a lot of factories moved there, so the smoke is blown towards HK (we don't really have many factories left, it's too expensive here).

Awesome Riding on a roofless bus, cruising through the neon streets If you want to, like, go shopping… at Ladies Market There are stalls with cute stuff, souvenirs (lots and lots of them) Talk the price down! Haggling is what really counts For some more miscellaneous and deep junk, more for the adult and thrilling The street where mystery thickens… Temple Street Would you like to try some cheap eats at the street stalls? Absolutely delicious! Asian food is the best!

NEON LIGHTS: You've all seen the stereotypical HK streets full of neon lights, but it's actually decreasing, because there's no newcomers to the industry (the lights are handmade).

LADIES MARKET: You can find so many stuff there indeed, for a cheap price! Branded stuff, fake stuff (we don't make them but yea you can find a lot of them), food and goldfish. Yes, there's a goldfish street. Why? I dunno, for luck I guess?!

TEMPLE STREET: Similar to ladies market, it's also great for shopping. This street is also known for (illegal) prostitution and triad, but it's still safe to visit, never in my life have I encountered any of them.

“Yoooooo, Mister, so I kinda sang this song, but seriously, rapping is surprisingly, like, tough?” “It’s also a shame that no one can see what I’m wearing, I’ve got serious swag, y'know.” “Phew… I kinda want to go home already… I mean, the peach buns are gonna be sold out.” “…can we go now?” “…can’t we go yet?” “Haah…” “Okay fine, like, whatever.”

One, two, three!*

PEACH BUN: They are actually eaten on birthdays, for longevity (that's what peach represents in Chinese culture).

*this line was spoken in Mandarin in the song, which would be the only critism I'd give. Yes a lot of people may understand Mandarin, but Cantonese and English are preferred and they are our official languages. One, two, three in Cantonese would be "yaat, yi, sam".

Oh. My. God. “The rent is really expensive…” Oh. My. Mind. “It’s not easy…” Why oh why? “It’s like, the highest in the world” We have serious inflation, but, whatever

EXPENSIVE RENT: We are the most expensive in the world, thanks to the high population density (and foreign buyers 😶), it's really not easy to afford a flat in HK, that’s why most HKers live with their parents until they get married (it’s also a cultural thing).

INFLATION: Stuff are still relatively cheap, but they are getting more expensive really quickly, mainly because of the rent of the shops.

Super they’re so adorable it hurts, the perfect balance of black and white pandas that bring you happiness… we sell them, sort of So fluffy and cute, such big round eyes The kinda? Make you Happy! Uh-huh

PANDAS: We actually only have 2 pandas here like everyone else, in Ocean Park (it's like an amusement park and zoo). They finally successfully mated recently, probably because of Corona shutdown lol!

There are over 100 of them, Tin Hau Temple, so super Before I head there, I seriously wanna eat… mango pudding! So many gods, like, one in every street Pay homage at the temple, light the fire of your incense!

TEMPLES: We still have the temples built before the colonial time! Hopefully, we are able to keep them too...

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MANGO PUDDING: It's so good yes! Our dessert culture is just the best seriously! We have so many restaurants just for desserts! They are great places to hang out with friends after work or school!

The air conditioning at its max, the fire burning strong A steaming hot pot made with a carefully chosen soup base If you want to detox, have a Chinese herbal hot pot Absolutely delicious! Asian food is the best! Riding on a roofless bus, cruising through the neon streets If you want to, like, go shopping… at Ladies Market There are stalls with cute stuff, souvenirs, lots and lots of them Talk the price down! Haggling is what really counts Absolutely delicious! Asian food is the best! Every minute Happy☆Nice Town (Guy)

HOT POT: We love it! We basically love when a lot of people sit together, talking, sharing food (like Yum Cha), it's the harmony and atmosphere that we like so much! And yes, there are a lot of different soup base you can choose from!

BARGAINING: Yes do it, especially if you're in places like Ladies' Market and you're a foreigner, they do price things up if you don't look like a local.

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Shout out to Takagi Motoki, the voice actor of HK, his voice fits the character perfectly! (and please get a new va for the new season please funimation) And how can he speak so fast?!

#aphasiaweek #APH Hong Kong #hws hong kong #hetalia #not biased at all but hk has one of the best character songs pls give him new songs in the new season himapapa #sorry im not following the prompts that well i dont have much time to make stuff #science poetry coming up i promise #Hong Kong culture

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365days365movies · 3 years

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January 25, 2021: The Poseidon Adventure (1972)

The disaster movie is, oddly enough, a subgenre of action, while also throwing in a splash of adventure. What I mean by that is, like adventure, focus is slightly shifted away from the characters acting against each other, and towards interactions between the characters and the environment around them. Essentially, an external environmental factor, outside of humans, is the antagonist, sometimes quite literally.

Now, obviously, humans can still be villains in disaster movies, but the conflict of the film always have to revolve around the disaster itself, with all other characters merely players in a large conflict. In other words, you got a main guy, shit explodes, and our main guy has to survive, sometimes with assholes getting in their way. Disaster movies in a nutshell, right there.

This movie trend began with 1970’s Airport, considered by most to be one of the crown jewels of the genre, especially at the time. They died in the mid-’70s, and the 1981 movie Airplane! (one of my favorite comedies) was the death knell for the genre...for about 13 years. I grew up in the reboot era of the disaster movie, with Independence Day, Twister, The Day After Tomorrow, War of the Worlds, Titanic, etc.

But today, we’re looking at what’s said to be the best of the best: the 1972 Academy Award-winning Ronald Neame film The Poseidon Adventure. This is Titanic before Titanic, but also after A Night to Remember...and the actual Titanic, obviously. All I know going in is that the ship is GOING DOWN. Also, Mermaid-Man’s in it. Hi, Ernest Borgnine!

Let’s go! SPOILERS AHEAD!!!

Recap

So, the opening text tells us RIGHT OFF that it’s New Years Eve, and that this ship, the S.S. Poseidon, is fucked. I’m impressed that we’re getting that out of the way immediately.

We cut to the ship, a cruise liner full of passengers during a storm. The Captain of the ship, Captain Harrison (Leslie Nielsen...LESLIE NIELSEN???)

From Airplane!? Wow! Never seen him in a dramatic role, so that’s awesome!

Anyway, things ain’t goin’ perfect. While a representative of the new owners of the ship forces them to go full speed (at considerable risk), the passengers include the disgruntled Mike Rogo (Ernest Borgnine) and his wife, Linda (Stella Stevens), the latter of which is going through a bout of seasickness. Other passengers include wide-eyed child Robin Shelby (Eric Shea) and his frustrated teenage sister Susan (Pamela Sue Martin); lonely runner James Martin (Red Buttons); married couple Betty and Manny Rosen (Shelley Winters and Jack “Grandpa Joe Who Could Walk The Whole Goddamn Time The Fuckin’ Faker” Albertson); “modern” preacher Reverend Frank Scott (Gene Hackman) and the more traditional Chaplain John (Arthur O’Connell); and singer Nonnie Parry (Carol Lynley), with her waiter admirer Acres (Roddy McDowall).

We’re introduced to these people in quick and efficient fashion, as well as their modus operandi. Rogo’s a detective-lieutenant, and his wife has a troubled past as a prostitute (and their relationship history is...complicated). The Shelby siblings are headed to see their parents overseas. James Martin’s a fitness-conscious bachelor and haberdasher who goes on morning runs. The Rosens have a son and 2-year old grandson in Israel that they’re going to visit, and are likely staying there. Frank Scott is an outspoken preacher, who believes that God only helps those who help themselves, and has been sent to Africa as a sort of punishment. And Nonnie Parry...well…

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Well, she’s singing the song that won this movie the 1972 Academy Award for Best Original Song. YEAH. THAT SONG. You’ve almost certainly heard it, and its fame has far surpassed this movie at this point.

That night, the song is sung at a New Years Party, at which all of our players are assembled. The Captain leaves for the deck, and discovers that an earthquake has just taken place off the coast of Crete. And underwater earthquakes create tsunamis. And tsunamis...well...the ship’s in for some trouble. Batten down, people. The New Year begins with great bombast and celebration...as the wall of water approaches.

Party’s over.

The ship tips, as the wall of water hits, and EVERYBODY goes falling. And I mean FALLING, it’s one hell of a scene. The ship flips entirely upside down, and people holding on to tables quickly fall. The lights go out. And all is quiet.

As the passengers come to, we get an accounting...of the survivors. After all, no way everyone could’ve survived that. The Rogos, Rosens, Rev. Scott, Nonnie, Acres, Martin, and the Shelbys all survive, although some of them need to be a little rescued from the ceiling.

The ship is now upside down. I’m sure that’ll be an issue eventually. For now, with some argument, Reverend Scott leads everyone in an effort to get up to the former floor, where injured waiter Acres is waiting. They use a Christmas tree as a ladder, and begin to climb up to a doorway out. Although, not everyone is inclined to go. Nonnie is the only surviving member of her band, which included her brother, and is only convinced by Martin to go.

The group of people that we’ve been following go, but literally everybody else stays behind. Sadly, this includes Chaplain John, who’s resigned himself and the other to their likely fatal end. He and Reverend Scott have a heart-to-heart, and Scott makes one last plea to the rest. However, the ship’s Purser (Byron Webster) insists that they must stay behind and wait for help, and the vast majority agree with him. And as soon as our group gets to safety…

This movie...this movie is fucking brutal. The throngs panic and try to climb to safety, but the tree falls...and everybody dies as the ship begins its descent. And the Reverend watches. And holy shit. I’m shook. Real talk, I am SHAKEN by this, about as much as the Reverend is. This is...whoof.

The group head towards the kitchen, and find a fire door sealed in place. The reverend tries to open it, despite Rogo’s very realistic and good warnings about flashover (the event during which fresh oxygen is introduced to an oxygen-starved fire, reigniting it violently and quickly). Despite this, Rogo helps him with the door, and the fire is luckily not a flashover. Rev. Scott goes in and makes it out, scouting a path through the fire (and the bodies).

They all make it through the kitchen, getting closer to the engine room. And that’s when the water starts coming in.

Once again, they all make it through, and begin traversing the next obstacle: a narrow tunnel that leads to a ventilation shaft with a ladder. Also, Linda (Rogo’s wife) is wearing VERY TALL high heels as she climbs up the ladder. Lady. DROP THE SHOES!!!!

They continue to make it through the shaft...and then another explosion hits! We lose our first party member, as Acres loses his footing and falls. Rogo almost goes with him, and Nonnie’s paralyzed with fear until Martin helps her.

By the way, I realize that reading this might be a bit cumbersome, as there are a lot of names here. But when you WATCH the movie, all of these people are distinct enough that remembering them isn’t too bad. And now...there are even more people.

That’s right! There are more people, being led by the Ship’s Doctor (Jan Arvan)...in the wrong direction. They head towards the bow, towards the water, despite Scott’s warnings. Scott’s frustration, the loss of Acres, and Rogo’s stubbornness leads to a confrontation. This leads to Scott making a bet with Rogo. He’ll scout ahead for a path to the engine room, and if there isn’t one, they’ll also head toward the bow. Rogo agrees, and gives him 15 minutes. Scott leaves, with Susan Shelby (teenage sister, remember) following behind. The rest search for food and supplies in the rooms nearby.

To Scott’s great dismay, however, the main passage to the engine room is destroyed. With Susan’s help, they look for more passages, eventually finding a path covered in oil. The Rosens have their own heart-to-heart, with Belle resigned to death, and Manny clinging to hope. Martin and Nonnie go together, with Nonnie breaking down over her lost brother, and Martin comforting her as best he can. They eventually reconvene, with Scott returned from the engine room successfully. However...Robin is missing.

Scott goes back to get him...and that’s when the water comes back.

They all once again make it...but the water’s now flooded the passageway to the engine room. Scott takes a rope and tries to swim through the passageway, with the rope being used to guide everyone else through once he makes it. But, of course, he gets stuck when a metal sheet collapses on top of him. But that’s when a surprising ringer steps up to help.

Belle Rosen, the down-on-herself, most resigned-to-death member of the party, also happens to be a former swimming champion. She makes it through, and saves Scott from drowning...and has a heart attack in the process. She gives Scott a pendant for her grandson...and dies.

And that’s when I start tearing up. Fuck. I mean it, her death really got me. Talk about a heroic sacrifice.

Rogo goes to find them, and discovers that Belle’s gone. Scott tells him to get the others, without telling Manny what happened. But Manny figures it out, diving into the water. The rest follow, although Nonnie can’t swim. Martin tells her that he won’t go without her, and they go together. Manny’s the first to make it to the other side...and he sees Belle.

And that’s when I tear up again. FUCK.

Manny initially won’t leave Belle, and Scott pleas with him to come with. He asks to stay with her a little longer, and Scott relents. He gives Belle one last kiss...and goes to join the others. Thank God. I need Manny Rosen to live, goddammit. In fact...I really don’t want to lose anyone else.

A harrowing climb to the engine room takes place, and we reach the final door. And then, of course...an explosion.

Linda dies. Goddammit. And Rogo lashes out at Scott, blaming him for her death. But there’s no time for that now. Explosions cause a steam pipe to explode, blocking the exit, prompting Scott to do his own lashing out: at God. He jumps to open a valve for the rest, despite the hot steam. He screams at God to take him, instead of another of their lives. And in the process, he shuts off the steam...and his plea is answered in turn.

As Scott dies, he asks Rogo to get the rest through. But Rogo’s listless, not responding at all. Martin reams him out, rousing him again and getting him up to lead the survivors. 6 people left...and only 5 minutes of movie to go. They get to the thinnest part of the hull, where they hear scraping from the outside. They bang on the hull with pipes, and banging responds. A torch cuts through the hull...BUT IT’S NOT A TORCH, IT’S AN EXPLOSION AND EVERYBODY DIES

Kidding, of course, as they get rescued! And as they mourn their fallen, it’s discovered that these 6...are the only survivors. In the entire ship, these six were the only ones to make it out.

And THAT...is The Poseidon Adventure. FUCK TITANIC. See you in the Epilogue.

#the poseidon adventure #ronald neame #irwin allen #gene hackman #ernest borgnine #red buttons #carol lynley #shelly winters #roddy mcdowall #stella stevens #jack albertson #pamela sue martin #eric shea #leslie nielsen #disaster movie #user365 #mygifs #my gifs #action january

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douchebagbrainwaves · 3 years

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AN ALTERNATIVE THEORY OF JUDGEMENT

Don't worry if a project doesn't seem to be any syntax for it. To kids, wealth is a fixed pie that's shared out, and if something great happens, they'll stick with it—something great meaning either that someone wants to buy them or invest millions of dollars. It's wrong to call it a trick in his case, though.1 If they'd waited to release everything at once, they wouldn't have presented them the way they did.2 With Robert this quality is wired-in. How many little startups are Google and Yahoo—though strictly speaking someone else did think of that before? Once you start talking to users, I guarantee you'll be surprised by what they tell you. That tends to produce deadlocks. Isaac Newton Newton has a strange syntax as because it has no syntax; you express programs directly in the parse trees that get built behind the scenes when other languages are parsed, and these trees are made of lists, which are Lisp data structures. Well, I said, I think is a red herring.3 It's what bias means.

Hard means worry: if you're not worrying that something you're making will come out badly, or that you won't get money, and if investors are skeptical, the startup should take a smaller amount and use that to get the chain reaction started.4 You can compile or run code while compiling, and read or compile code at runtime. There are times in most of the talking, but he described his co-founder as the best hacker he'd ever met, and you willingly give him money in return for it. The distributors want to prevent the transparency that comes from having prices online.5 My relationship with my cofounder went from just being friends to seeing each other all the time, perhaps most of the time you'll find the person instinctively thinks the idea will be familiar to anyone who doesn't like being asked what they do. You can see the same thing with equity instead of debt. T: Scheme has no libraries. This is what you end up among the living or the dead comes down to the third ingredient, not giving up. The important part is not whether he makes ten million a year or a hundred, but how you get there. Since it is a huge time sink. Most people think they hate math, but the biggest win for languages like Lisp is at the other end of the spectrum, where you need to do what you know intellectually to be right, even though the phrase compact disc player end up spending considerable money at sites offering compact disc players, then those pages will have a large Baumol penumbra around it: anyone who could get rich, but as long as you have some core of users who really love you, or is there at least some little group that does? Optimizing in solution-space is familiar and straightforward, but you have to assume it takes some amount of pain.6

Is making money really that important?7 You probably can't overcome anything so pervasive as the model of work is a job. Before you can adjust, you're thrown sideways as the car screeches into the first turn. But it also explains why the ups and downs were more extreme than they were prepared for. Try to get your slides under 20 words if you can find, use the most powerful forces in history. It's the ones in the middle of the 20th century that convinced some people otherwise.8 You can shift into a different mode of working. And yet most VCs are driven by the same underlying cause: the number of startups. The bigger the community, the greater the chance it will contain the person who has that one thing you need most. Your Hopes Up.9

This is what you end up with: def foo n: return lambda i: return n i To be fair, Perl also retains this distinction, but deals with it in typical Perl fashion by letting you omit returns.10 Don't worry what people will say.11 The point of high-level languages is to give you bigger abstractions—bigger bricks, as it were, so you have to create a descriptive phrase about yourself that sticks in their heads. In 1958 these ideas were far removed from ordinary programming practice, which was dictated largely by the hardware available in the late nineties you could get rich by taking money from the poor, then you can build all the rest of the world, at least not in the sense that the measure of good design can be derived, and around which most design issues center. The new model seems more liquid, and more efficient.12 I've been repeating that since 1993, and I tend to agree. Check whether they outperform the others. Nearly all textbooks are bad.

If a design represents an idea that fits in one person's head, then the idea will be a good thing when it happens, because these new investors will be compelled by the structure of the investments they make to be ten times bolder than present day VCs. But make sure to write something that sounds like spontaneous, informal speech, and deliver it that way too. The bad news is that I was ready for something else. Thanks to Immad Akhund, Sam Altman, John Bautista, Pete Koomen, Jessica Livingston, Dan Siroker, Harj Taggar, and Fred Wilson for reading drafts of this.13 Several people used that word married. Can you have a healthy society with great variation in wealth and income, then follow it with the most naive speculation about the underlying causes.14 It's not like doing extra work for extra credit. Do less.15 Fred Brooks described this phenomenon in his famous book The Mythical Man-Month, and everything I've seen has tended to confirm what he said. If you asked the pointy-haired bosses to revert to the mean. But I could be wrong.16

Notes

Most don't try to write about the prior probability of an outcast, just try to make more money was the reason the young care so much attention. In fact, for example, probably did more drugs in his twenties than any other field, it's implicit that this excludes trickery like buying users for more of the market price for you; you're too early really means is you're getting the stats for occurrences of foo in the world. There was no great risk in doing something, but I couldn't believe it or not, bleeding out invites at a Demo Day or die. If I paint someone's house, though.

A significant component of piracy, which is the unpromising-seeming startups are usually about things you like shit. It's hard to predict areas where Apple will be big successes but who are younger or more ambitious the utility function for money. This is not how to use thresholds proportionate to wd m-k w-d n, where w is will and d discipline. Some founders listen more than you otherwise would have expected them to stay around, but for different things from different, simpler organisms over unimaginably long periods of time on is a declaration of war on.

Naive founders think Wow, a VC means they'll look bad if that got bootstrapped with consulting. But there is a cause them to. Viaweb, which would be worth it for you by accidents of age and geography, rather than making the broadest type of mail, I use. Nat.

Yes, I mean that if you seem like noise. The Roman commander specifically ordered that he could accept it.

It's not quite as harmless as we use have a notebook to write it all yourself.

They hate their bread and butter cases.

It took a back seat to philology, which people used to reply that they will come at an academic talk might appreciate a joke, they mean.

There's probably also encourage companies to build their sites, and intelligence can help founders is the ability of big corporations found that 16 of the next round.

So whatever market you're in, we love big juicy lumbar disc herniation as juicy except literally. Comments at the top startup law firms are Wilson Sonsini, Orrick, Fenwick West, Gunderson Dettmer, and domino effects among investors. Maybe markets will eventually get comfortable with potential earnings.

So if it's dismissed, it's probably a cause for optimism: American graduates have more options. You have to sweat any one outcome. They shut down in, but historical abuses are easier for us! People were more the aggregate are overpaid.

Now many tech companies don't want to help you even working on your cap table, and know the combination of circumstances in the life of a silver mine.

If anyone wanted to make a conscious effort to be, and that they don't know which name will stick. I'm not saying that the guys running Digg are especially sneaky, but not in 1950. In the beginning of the things attributed to Confucius and Socrates resemble their actual opinions.

Now we don't want to measure how dependent you've become on distractions, try this experiment: set aside a chunk of this: You may not have gotten the royal raspberry. Conjecture: The Duty of Genius, Penguin, 1991. That's the best hackers work on Wall Street were in 2000, because the publishers exert so much about unimportant things.

There are aspects of the big acquisition offers most successful ones. There is archaeological evidence for large settlements earlier, but I took so long. Basically, the mean annual wage in the narrowest sense. If someone just sold a nice thing to be about web-based software will make it to the table.

S P 500 CEOs in 2002 was 35,560.

Sites that habitually linkjack get banned. Eighteen months later. Compromising a server could cause such damage that ASPs that want to give each customer the impression that the site was about the Thanksgiving turkey. Without the prospect of publication, the reaction was so great, why didn't the Industrial Revolution was one firm that wanted to than because they will fund you, it often means the right to do this yourself.

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allenmendezsr · 4 years

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Mi40x

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Mi40x

Buy Now

Hey, what’s up? I’m Ben Pakulski, and I am going to tell you the secret to gaining POUNDS of lean muscle every week. Yeah, I said POUNDS, while stripping off your body fat at the same time….And the WILDEST part of it all?

This secret takes you EXACTLY 4 minutes to do

Today you’ll witness a bizarre new cutting-edge technique used by pro fitness athletes and movie stars to pack on muscle faster than most so-called experts think is possible

I’m not talking about a few pounds of muscle that no one but your grandma will notice

I’m talking about head-spinning, attention-demanding muscle that puts you in a league all your own in the gym. And packing it on in FAR less time than most guys train

PLUS without sacrificing your lifestyle to do it.

Think about it:

Do you really think these skinny actors who all of a sudden look like Greek Gods, or guys like me who make their living by being huge, don’t have a few tricks up their sleeve?…

If you think it’s some magical supplement, 8 hours in the gym (like I’ve heard some guys claim, which is BS), or the right “gear”, if you know what I mean

Think again

Listen: I know guys who do these insanity-bragging workouts and take stuff they give HORSES just to gain a few measly ounces of muscle

Most of them STILL fail to pack it on, because they haven’t got a clue how to REALLY train for maximum mass.

How to trick their bodies into what I call

hyper-recovery

Have a look at the guys I’ve shared this secret with, this represents just a handful of my so-called, “Guinea Lion Group”:

Can’t call them pigs because now they’re all freakin’ ripped!

Your recovery is rocketed through the roof

You spend HALF the time guys currently spend in the gym

MUCH MORE time resting and eating normal food

And you’ll STILL gain MORE muscle and absolutely shred your body fat

LET ME REPEAT…

I’m talking about several POUNDS of lean muscle every week.

And it all happens thanks to a style of training I’ll reveal today.

A protocol that’s a whopping FOUR MINUTES LONG.

One that stimulates the production of a highly unique super recovery muscle helper cell, called satellite cells.

This is just THE muscle-building info you didn’t know about until today.

Look, I know you’re curious, and I’ll explain all of this in a few minutes.

Because it will forever change the way you approach weight training, and even how you think about dieting… FOR GOOD!

I just have to WARN YOU about something, and you have to promise you’ll take this warning seriously before you continue reading!

This website is getting a lot of attention

A certain search engine is trying to get this information BANNED because I’m pissing off a lot of really HUGE supplement companies and magazines.

These guys have billions of dollars, plenty of cash to sue my ass, and there’s no way I’m going to be able to keep this website live much longer if this pressure continues

I’ll be forced to either take it down, or charge $97 a head to attend a “webinar” and read the same exact letter you are reading right now for free

So, you best be sure you do just that:

– Read this now, while it’s still on the Internet

– Listen, if you have been told there “is no secret” to building muscle, or that you can only build muscle “slowly”

– Or, worse than that, you can gain muscle, but you’ll pack on some fat while doing it

You’ve been LIED TO

…And today, I’ll prove it to you

Oh, I’ve seen it all

I’m a pro bodybuilder, so you can only imagine what I’ve seen guys do out of desperation and greed over precious muscle

I’ve seen guys train for 7 straight hours

I’ve seen dudes take outrageous amounts of illegal gear, enough to kill them if they keep it up

And I’ve seen thousands of guys like you:

Good guys who are just wanting to add 10, 20, maybe even 30 pounds of rock-hard muscle in just the right places

A bigger chest, better arms, cut abs, and delts that look so killer, it looks like you’d have to turn sideways to get through a door

And let’s be honest:

You want more attention? (hey, it’s normal)

Attention from women? (sure, it’s gonna happen)

Jealous friends in the gym? (bound to happen too)

And with that attention comes respect, confidence, and the POWER to really move through life like an Alpha animal

Taking charge, making it happen, and forging a life out of iron… one that YOU control, not that controls YOU!

However, here’s what I’ve NEVER SEEN:

In over 15 years of training, I’ve never seen anything come close to this almost ALIEN method of gaining muscle

You’ll end up the strongest guy in the gym, even though this isn’t about “lifting heavy”

You’ll end up totally lean with that beach-ready body you want because this method of training automatically burns body fat

More body fat than you can ever burn off by starving yourself

And, it’s FAST:

How fast? 200% faster than traditional weight training! We’re talking about you adding POUNDS of lean muscle every week. Not every month, every week

That’s 10 pounds in less than 5 weeks, 20 pounds in less than 10 weeks… As much muscle as you desire!

And here’s the really, REALLY incredible part:

Guess what’s feeding all that new muscle on your body?

Your unwanted, unwelcome, downright UGLY body fat

This one technique, revealed in detail within this free presentation, gives you more muscle mass faster, and it WORKS by using your own body fat for fuel…

That’s right: you get bigger and leaner at the SAME TIME!

And that’s what you really want

Getting LEANER as you get BIGGER makes everything look and feel HARDER

Just like these guys have done, and literally hundreds of other guys I shared this one stealth technique with over the past several months

And let me save you some time:

You’ll never hear about this in a magazine, because I’ve made 100% sure EVERYONE I shared it with kept their mouths shut about it

And, for good reason:

This unusual method of training was just reviewed and studied by a major university, and I didn’t want anyone talking about their insane results until after this training protocol was proven to work scientifically

So, while all these guys changed their body within WEEKS instead of months or years, without taking illegal gear of any kind, and without even giving up the foods they enjoy eating or having a few beers with their buds

I wasn’t ready to tell the world about this muscle revolution until I had the science to back it up

Now, I’m ready, and I guarantee YOU better be ready to buy some new shirts, because after today you’ll need ’em, unless you like the Hulk look and don’t mind ripped-out sleeves, or just wearing tank tops everywhere

You must be ready for a load of questions from strangers, like, “How big ARE your arms, man?” and, “I bet you can bench press a freakin’ HOUSE, right?”

And yeah, you’ll have so many guys asking you HOW you got the body you’re about to have, you can start charging hard cash to give them the answers, and they’ll pay you

Trust me, I know

Ready for the secret?

Pay attention, because this is the only place you’ll ever hear about it, and that’s because I’m the guy who invented it, and who put it to the test in university studies

It all starts HERE:

Each of these balloons represents one of your muscle cells.

Get these cells bigger, and YOU get bigger, and I bet you know that already

Now, here’s what you may have never heard before:

You build muscle WHILE RESTING, not while at the gym

Your mission in the gym is SO SIMPLE:

Stimulate your muscles into growth… Period! End of story.

Stimulate, then go home and eat, that’s what you do

You don’t just, “lift weights”

Come on man, you KNOW for a fact that isn’t working for you

It’s the way you lift during your last 4 minutes of an exercise that makes ALL the difference

These 4 minutes create 200% more muscle gains… FACT, not theory, and these 4 minutes are the difference between looking average

And looking awesome!

Want proof?

Click the image to see the science.

So, how does this weird 4-minute trick work?

First, it takes every cell in your muscle fibers. And, just like a balloon..

EXPANDS THEM.

Normal training tears down muscle fibers and forces your body to go into crisis mode, trying like hell to repair it before your next workout

However, you can expand a cell without experiencing this recovery crisis

In fact, that’s exactly what my patented, university-proven system is called:

Cell Expansion Protocol Training, or CEP Training for short

It’s unlike anything you’ve ever experienced, and it takes a whopping four minutes per exercise to automatically trigger the CEP Response

So, rather than ripping your fibers to shreds, you selectively stimulate

You use the 4-minute CEP Training Principle to force every cell in every muscle into hyper-recovery mode

Think about it:

Take a balloon…

If you were to train the old-fashioned way, this balloon would swell up temporarily.

That’s the pump we all love, right?

And as you know, that pump goes away

Now, imagine if your pump never went away?

What if you were given the key to “tricking” your muscles cells into expanding and expanding

And your cells recovered so quickly, it looks as if you have a CONSTANT PUMP?

How would that feel? Orgasmic, that’s how

I’m going to demonstrate on video CEP Training for Biceps today

So by the time this presentation ends, you’ll at least be able to get started using CEP with your biceps

So keep watching, unless you enjoy having skinny arms

Now, there’s a reason why this happens with CEP Training, and not with any other form of muscle-building training

And why it cuts everyone’s gym time nearly IN HALF at the same time

It goes back to what I mentioned to you before: Satellite cells

We’ve proven that stimulation of muscle tissue using CEP Training dramatically increases satellite cell production

Satellite cells are cells made by your body to help repair muscle damage

So, just think about it for a second:

If you stimulate your muscles using CEP, And CEP produces FAR MORE satellite cells than traditional training

That means you recover much faster

And faster recovery means faster muscle growth, because a muscle ONLY grows during recovery

Getting the really big picture now?

Less time in the gym

Plus 4 minutes of CEP Training at the end of a movement

And you get a load more of your body’s most powerful muscle-building recovery cells speeding to your aching body parts

Blasting your recovery through the roof

And expanding the size and volume of each muscle cell

Expanded Cells means MASS

As much as you want

10 pounds, 15 pounds, 25 pounds, hell, 100 pounds if you want

It’s all the same training, the only difference is the amount of food you eat

The BEST part of it all is that CEP Training creates the muscle you desire automatically

Your body is literally FORCED to expand its muscles cells in response to CEP Training

You give it no choice

And your body gets the fuel it needs to expand your cells from your stored body fat

Sure, if you eat 7 pizzas a day, it will use that for fuel

Yet, if you’re eating half-way normally, your body fat will be ROBBED to pay the energy price of all that satellite cell production and cell expansion

And that gives YOU the body you want

By now, you’re wanting to get started using CEP as soon as possible

And the question you have is HOW:

How do you get started? What do you do first?

Here’s your choice

You can keep reading, and you’ll see me demonstrate CEP Training for biceps

And then you can try to figure the rest out on your own

Good luck with that, because you’ll need it

CEP Training is extremely specific to each body part

What works for biceps definitely will NOT work for chest, for example

Hey, you can TRY

Or, you can man-up, admit that you want a Mr. Olympia-caliber bodybuilder to personally COACH YOU

Radically decreasing the time it will take for you to walk down the beach with a body other guys would kill for

Or hang by the pool in the skimpy bikini-clad hottie section and let the women fight over who got your attention first!

Or, just look the way you’ve always wanted to look when you go out on the town

Whatever you want, this is the fastest track to give it to you:

I call it The MI40 CEP Training Program.

The MI40 CEP Rapid Start Action Plan

This video is literally 5 minutes – it takes me only 5 MINUTES to get you started using CEP in your very first workout

So, if you’re like me and you’re in a hurry, this video alone is worth its weight in gold

And, if you’re like a lot of guys I coach, guys who want every little detail spelled out so they couldn’t mess it up if they tried

Then here’s what else I have for you today:

CEP Practical Application Guide

Not only will you want to KNOW the secrets, you’ll want to know HOW to apply them so you can start TRANSFORMING your body NOW! Not tomorrow, TODAY!

This guide will show you how to bring theory to the REAL WORLD in meathead English that even the most hardcore numbskull can understand and start getting their BEST RESULTS EVER.

This guide is gold

Nutrition Guide

Good results start with good nutrition… AMAZING results start with CEP-style Nutrition!

Ever wonder what’s best to eat and when? Ever confused after reading bullshit article after bullshit article? Do you ever think what really is the best approach to achieving your dream physique?

Solution… the MI40-X Nutrition Guide!

The cutting-edge principles laid out here will provide the building blocks for your INSANE transformation… a complicated topic with complicated tactics made STUPID SIMPLE…

This guide will be your go-to resource from here on out, something you can refer to again and again..

God results start with good nutrition… AMAZING results start with CEP-style Nutrition!

Supplement Guide

With a billion dollar industry breathing down your neck 24/7, it’s hard to separate fact from fiction… and with so many supplements out there, who’s got time to do the research?

Well, BPak’s got your back! 😉

This guide not only tells you THE best supplements, it tells you WHEN to take them in a WHOLE RANGE of different situations….

Not sleeping well? …I’ve got a protocol for that!

Feel like you want to be able to push harder in the gym? …covered!

On a budget? …I’ll lay out just the essentials so you can work with what you have!

I’ll even tell you where to buy all this stuff easily and quickly so you can get reputable products, PROVEN to work, to help you start GAINING muscle and DROPPING that ugly belly fat FAST!

FAQ Guide

All your questions answered… all the info you need so you can spend your time making progress, not online searching for clues!

I’ve taken the most common questions from those testing the program and broken them down in detail.. you’ll be quickly on the FAST-TRACK to a SHIRT-RIPPING chest and perfectly cut ABS!

A Guide you can quickly reference at any time, so you can spend more time DOING and less time sitting around trying to figure it out.

Workout Sheets

The most intelligent muscle-building workouts EVER designed, ready to print and take with you to the gym.

No matter your starting point, I’ve got a workout for you!

3 levels of workouts that will kick your butt… but leave you wanting more!

Think you’re advanced and can handle anything thrown your way? Well Mr. Awesome, give the Pro workouts a whirl and I GUARANTEE you’ll be coming back to me with your tail between your legs!

Don’t say I didn’t warn you!

These are THE workouts you NEED to surpass anything you’ve ever done in the gym, and cause GROWTH that transforms your body in 6 short weeks! Time to take things to the next level!

7 Day Primer Phase

To get the best out of MI40-X… form is key!

A world class program such as MI40-X requires world class attention to detail to get the most out of it! To make sure you possess THE most OPTIMAL form… that you are on the road to having a world-class MIND-MUSCLE connection just like the elite-level pros… you MUST run through this program!

Years of poor lifting combined with an extreme program are a recipe for disaster! This program, in combination with the training videos and execution guide, will provide IDEAL preparation for MI40-X… after this, you’ll be ready to hit the ground running and soon making the GAINS of your life!

….this guide is a learning curve for many, but an ideal primer for ALL!

7 Day Detox Diet

A no-brainer as to what this is right?

…well, it’s better!

This guide not only tells you what to eat and when to eat it… but the diet is specifically designed to prepare your body to MAXIMALLY use EVERY oz of nutrition and supplementation you give it as you run through the MI40-X program!

If your body isn’t efficiently using what it gets, then do you expect your results to be optimal? Of course not! The chances are high that what you’re eating now has left your body in a poor state to jump right into MI40-X… you’ll be wanting AMAZING results, not ‘okay’ results. To make sure that happens… enter, the 7-Day Detox Diet! A perfect companion to the Primer Phase!

I recommend you run this program for up to 3 weeks before jumping into MI40-X… but even if you’re just too excited and just can’t wait that long to begin the program, even a week on this diet will have you well on the way to achieving results you didn’t think possible!

This diet is a great addition to your nutrition arsenal away from the MI40-X program too – you can use it for one week out of every month to optimize your health, and to increase the chances of success on any other program you may decide to engage in in the future.

The Exercise Execution Guide

Every body part, every exercise, every freakin’ detail spelled out for you so there’s absolutely zero guesswork needed on your part.

You’ll always know EXACTLY what to do, and precisely how to do it.

The Execution Guide is your exercise bible for recreating your physique from head to toe using super-simple, common sense, no BS-style instruction that has only one goal in mind:

Your most muscular, ripped, and perfect body!

The CEP Training Blueprint

Inside, you’ll discover the methods of training you absolutely MUST AVOID if you want to actually LOOK like you lift.

Face it, most guys who train look like they play soccer or something…

You want to look like a dude with MUSCLE!

So, turn to page 6 as soon as you get the Blueprint in your hands to discover all the messed-up training methods that the magazines and idiot gym rats have tried to pass off as fact.

Trust me, I guarantee you are using some, if not ALL of these waste-of-time methods, and they do far worse than waste your time:

They are keeping you from the body you want!

They literally HALT muscle growth and PROMOTE more fat storage!

You’ll also discover the reason why I insist you enjoy your food…

Even as CEP Training is stripping all that unwanted fat off your body, you’ll be laughing in the faces of guys doing hours of cardio, HOPING they’ll see an ab one day, if they’re lucky!

With CEP, you don’t NEED CARDIO.

And you don’t need to overdo it on the diet…

Listen: I know you enjoy a few beers with your friends, and that you have better things to do than eat all damn day!

That’s why I made the CEP Training nutrition guidelines so dead simple.

Now, that’s not all you’ll be receiving today:

I also want you to have private access to my

MI40 CEP Training Video Library

I’ll be your personal trainer on every exercise, so you can be 100% confident you’re doing the CEP training to get all the benefits!

Yet, the Library offers you a lot more than that:

I break every CEP Training exercise down into 3 phases, just in case you’re just starting out, or you’re fairly experienced, or perhaps you’re a fitness pro… doesn’t matter:

Everyone, from newbie natural to pro athlete is covered in these 3 phases!

Plus, each video focuses on ONE body part, so you can pick and choose which body parts you most want to focus on.

Some guys want bigger arms right away, so you can start there…

Or maybe it’s your legs

Your chest

Your back

You font-18px text-bold opensans it, it’s covered in the CEP Training Video Library

Hey, I’m not finished yet! You’ll also receive your copy of

The MI40-Xtreme Total Training Videos.

And here’s why you need this:

CEP Training cannot be done for every exercise

Only specific exercises use CEP Training

And, if you try it on the WRONG exercise, watch out

You’ll end up getting nowhere, or worse.

That’s why you need the ENTIRE SET of my training videos, to make SURE you use only the CEP-Approved Movements

AND to guarantee you stay super-motivated for as long as you need to get that body you desire

These videos contain a TON of tips that only pros know to get the most out of every second you spend in the gym

So you can spend LESS time, and get the hell out and go enjoy your life

Knowing you’ve done just the right amount of ass-kicking work to stimulate those cells to expand.

Now, you may believe that a program this unique is pretty damn expensive

With all the time and money I’ve invested into it — almost three years of research, testing, paying lab geeks to prove the theory to be fact — not to mention the decades of training and learning I’ve done to bring it all together in my own body…

So, when I initially set the price for the entire MI40 CEP Training System at $197, my girlfriend Amanda almost kicked me out of bed… literally!

“Ben, if you sell your system you’ve worked so hard on for less than you charge for a single hour of consulting, I’m not sleeping with you for a MONTH!”

Yeah, she’s hard-core

I did what any other guy would do

I lied.

She thinks I’m selling the MI40 CEP Training System for $397

And that would be a steal

Yet, I’m not

At least not yet

I made myself a deal:

I said, “Ben, even though you decided to release this to the world, you have to keep it stealth”

Otherwise, MY competition will just get tougher

And, to be honest, since I treat every MI40 CEP Member like a kid brother, I just don’t have the time or energy to spend by letting a million guys into the mix

So, once I hit a very modest goal in sales, I’m going to charge $397 for the System

If you’re reading this presentation, that means I’m close to that goal

Very, very close

So, here’s your No BS, Limited-Time, Save Ben From Lonely Nights Of Living Hell Offer:

I’m going to give it all to you today, immediate access to everything, no shipping. I’ll set you up with digital, start-today access:

The entire MI40 CEP Training System

The CEP Rapid Start Training Video, 5 short minutes to get you in the gym and growing faster than ever

Exercise Execution Guide, every exercise, every step, laid out with idiot-proof instructions even my moronic ex-training partner could easily understand

The CEP Training Video Library, every CEP-friendly exercise visually demonstrated by me, including instructions for beginners, intermediate muscleheads, and advanced athletes.

And The CEP Total Training Library, so you see EVERY exercise you will EVER NEED to build the body you desire.

The CEP Blueprint…all the science explained… in a manner so simple you don’t need a PHD to understand it!

The CEP Practical Application Guide…how to apply the CEP principles for UNSTOPPABLE gains!

The CEP Nutrition Guide…cutting-edge nutrition guidelines for MAXIMUM results… for LIFE!

The CEP Supplement Guide…a comprehensive guide to THE best supplements… what you should be taking to OPTIMIZE your training AND your RESULTS!

The CEP FAQ Guide…the most frequently asked questions, covered in-depth… so, less guessing, more GROWING!

3 Levels of CEP Workouts…from natural newbie, to pro athlete, every angle covered…and warning, “Pro” means Pro! 😉

The 7 Day Primer Phase…a short program, intelligently designed, to prepare you for MAXIMUM results during MI40 CEP!

The 7 Day Detox Diet…you’re gonna need to utilize your calories as best you can during MI40 CEP.. this handy little short term diet will have your body ready to CRUSH IT when the time comes!!

All of this

For just 1 pathetically small investment of only $97.

You read that right

Not 3 payments of $97

Not 2 payments of $97

Only 1 payment of just $97

Listen, I’m going to put that into crystal clear perspective for you:

You’d spend that much or more on a one session with a pathetic gym trainer

Some dude that thinks because he has a certificate that took him a week to earn, he knows how the hell to train YOU

What a joke

Most so-called “trainers” piss me off because they haven’t got a CLUE how to help the average guy build crazy muscle insanely fast

Hey, if you carelessly decide to try one of these (cough, laugh) “trainers” make damn sure he’s CEP Certified

And he won’t be, only my guys are, and they’ll charge you about $200 minimum to consult with you, and well over two grand a month to actually train you

Sure, there are rich guys that pay us that kind of cash, I’m just offering you a rare opportunity to get the same exact value for a fraction of the cost!

And listen:

You’re going to WASTE far more money than $97 over the next 30 days, simply from eating the wrong foods and taking BS mass-produced commercial supplements that you actually just piss down the toilet

Worst of all, you’ll be wasting TIME, which is the most valuable thing in the universe

Or, get SMART:

Take the fast track

The done-for-you path

And allow me to hand you the MI40 CEP Training System personally in a matter of seconds from now

Just click the button below:

Click that button, and the keys to more eye-catching, jaw-dropping muscle in less than HALF the time will be handed to you today

Muscle that is created using your BODY FAT for fuel

So you get bigger and more ripped at the same time

And, you do it all with a 4-minute CEP Training Protocol

More muscle and less fat in literally DAYS from now. Not months, DAYS!

For what you probably spend on two months worth of protein powder, you can get a plan to actually get the body you always wanted…

0 notes

thepeerieeen · 7 years

Text

I'm having a "bad brain day" so I'm gonna binge watch some (presumably shitty) teenage tv, and you never know, I might enjoy it. So I'm seeing Free Rein on Netflix and I'm gonna give it a watch: here are my thoughts below the cut (it gets long, sorry). I should also note that I know next to nothing about horses or horse riding. Also there are probably spoilers ahead.

Ep1:

Nice scenery

She looks uncomfortable, like they've just put her on a horse and told her to smile

Why is Zoe Scottish

Wait nvm

Oh hey, Zoe's cute

The grandad is brilliant I already love him

Ah, no father. Same

Why is there just shit on the side of the road, there are no animals around and I doubt the horses would go to the side of the road to poo

Why does he still have kids drawings on his cupboards?

Digging the teapot

Ah, layered tops. Typical teenage fashion

"The light will come through again" needing that today

Haha "what's a wifi"

At least they represent Jetlag though

Ah yes, one daughter goes missing - send the other one out to look for her. What could possibly go wrong.

Ooh, that acting wasn't great. Though the blonde is actually quite a good actress

Ooh, Raven. Ooh, foreshadowing (I guess)

K but this isn't the type of thing Austen would write

Why is Marcus like 25, the others are like 12 what

He's not even that attractive? (Says the bisexual who is more into women rn)

Horsome - the new fetch

Ah yes, get off the bike, that makes sense

Oh look a wild horse, who'd've ever thought???

Oh wow! Wild horse who is only understood by outcast? This is groundbreaking!

(Jk I'm kinda into this ngl)

An actual Scottish person!

Who's the guy with the cheekbones and why is he so shifty

What happened to the bike?

Oh Derek is obviously in love with the main stable person

Ah yes, stop looking for your sister and go chat to a horse

Bitch number one has arrived

Of course she owns the horse. That makes sense

They've called him hot Marcus jesus what is this

Cheekbones is stealing. Stop being shifty.

Welp theres the first continuity error I've spotted

Cheekbones is stalking now, apparently

Cheekbones is about to be falling in love, I'm calling it

He's also like, twenty tho

Oh shit what why is she being stalked now??

Ep2:

This is clearly a dream though

Are jelly shoes back in fashion? Sweet

I refuse to believe she could hear him from that distance and a closed window

I predict a love triangle

I mean cheekbones has a point

That wasn't a long conversation, like, that woulda taken an hour for me how does the mother do that?

Ah, ye olde fart joke

Bitch number one pulling the "I have lots of money" card

So they're putting cheekbones and Zoe together. I mean I can live with that

Oh my god cheekbones don't be such an arse

You'd think the mother would have worried if her other daughter didn't turn up the the pier where they agreed to meet?

Let's read mum's old diary! That can never go wrong!

They're literally stalking hot Marcus? Thats a?? Wee bit weird???

They're actually letting Mia go on Raven? Wow

Bob is kinda cute actually

I mean... she kinda deserved to fall not gonna lie

Bet Zoe is gonna make the magazine cover. Would serve Mia right lmao

Ok that's kinda cute, cheekbones. At least we know you're human

Wait what? Is cheekbone's name Pin?

WHAT SORT OF A NAME IS PIN?!

And the mother doesn't want the daughter to be riding. That makes a lot of sense. Totally.

Did she even peel those carrots?

Why has no one noticed she's wearing someone else's hoodie?

THANK YOOOOU

Oh shit, cheekbones is stealing the sedatives. No one saw that coming

Ep3:

K but she didn't say you couldn't go to the stables?

Rosie is honestly brilliant

Grandpa and I are on the same wavelength

Pin cam - idk man surely you could just... talk to him?

How could Marcus tell it was too small?? He wasn't looking at her???

Oh my god. Tie up your hair

Of course she's a prodigy, why wouldn't she be

They actually have a secret hip hop dance routine?? I wanna see that not gonna lie

The pun and finger guns have me. This kid is my new favourite character

Rosie, much though I like you, that is a total breach of privacy

Told you Pin cam would backfire

Now Marcus is going to find out about her "recording him"

It's only £10? I wanna go to pony camp.

Bet cheekbones is gonna go into where she just went

Called it

There must be a more subtle way to break into the medicine cabinet than with a screwdriver?

He's obviously not a horse thief? Medicine thief sure, horse thief nah

And I suppose that's Raven telling her it wasn't him, because that makes perfect sense

Ugh Mia calm down

Tbh maybe the parents would be better off separated? But like idk

It's the police, for why

Of course it was firefly that got stolen. I kinda feel for Mia and her bad acting.

Ep4:

How come is Pin allowed to come back even though he was stealing sedatives? That's still kinda illegal?

You're not banned from the stables though, are you Zoe

Rosie you sarcastic legend

She has a point though, what if she breaks her leg

Why is everyone attracted to Marcus?

Puns

Oh look, it pin

.....why do I dress the same way as Pin?

Who in their right mind needs three horses?

Pin is ignoring her - quite right honestly

Ah yes, subtly eavesdropping

I bet Elliot isn't even E

Ben is great

Ben and Rosie are in love. I've decided.

If course Pin is leading the hack

Mr Cheekbones! That's totally who he is! I called it!

He clearly doesn't want to talk, like... maybe let Pin get over the whole getting arrested thing? Idk

Why Becky? I don't understand?

Ah yes, follow the broody horse guy who was stealing sedatives, that can't possibly go wrong and is obviously the best option

Wait so Zoe followed Pin to his house and is now demanding he tells her what he has in the weird crate thing? Wow

And it's a horse. Wow. It's not like this is a horse show or anything

Called it, not a horse thief

Pin’s actually kinda sweet

Wait

Am I attracted to Pin?

I think I'm attracted to Pin

Shit

Decent cinematography there though

Ghost pony is a brilliant story

Wow Mia is such a dick

Now, this can go one of two ways. And I confidently predict Mia is gonna tell Zoe's mum she's not allowed to ride

Called it

Ep5:

Well the riding crop thing Is obviously the mother's

Oh yeah, Marcus is a character

How did anyone actually get close enough to Raven to braid his tail?

Savaaaaaaage

Ugh "like electricity" ughhh

What happened to Rosie?

Grandpa is brilliant and I love him

Why would fixing a radio make it up to Pin? I don't understand?

Those leather trousers though....

They're actually kinda cute together.... what is this

I ship it?

I still find Pin vaguely attractive and idk why

Oh hey Marcus, you're here as Love Interest #2

Oh no, I feel a bit bad for Rosie, I hope she doesn't get bullied

I'm emotionally attached

What is this

Why am I hooked on this television programme

Why

She can't seriously be intending to stay the whole night in the hay? It gets cold at night how're they gonna survive?

Oh actually Rosie might do okay. Cool

Who is gonna clean up all those crisps though?

Ghost pony, again

Pebbles?! Brilliant

I love Becky.

This can not end well

Definition of me on social media

She has five horses? Who needs five horses??

It's gonna be Rosie and crew, not horse thieves

..., that was unexpected

I am also relieved to find out there is no ghost pony

Look at them, stealing the horse.

Or not

Ep6:

Oh yeah, time zones are a thing

Rosie is not a subtle eavesdropper

Ah, a horse show. Why didn't I expect that

£15,000. Enough to, say, help this stable that is running low on money which we have been repeatedly told from the first episode? Let me guess, another, rival stable always wins and there's no way they could never pull it off?

Holloway Riding School. Called it

Can Becky just give away food?

"Keeping you entertained is easy" is it though????

Mate listen to his teachings.

You need your foundations in place before you can get any good?

"Let me go over the jump" "no" *does it* "wow well done"

Ugh she's gonna ride raven

Bet it doesn't go well

That's very Rube Goldberg not gonna lie

One little ride around the paddock will hurt

There's a race? The quads are gonna win

Bob was not made for speed.

And there goes Raven

Because obviously.

Pin looks worried because he has a crush on Zoe. Obviously

And yet Marcus is gonna get all the glory

That cringey ADR

Marcus has a point though, the basics are important

We're unlocking Maggie's backstory

She can't still be upset about a horse that died over 15 years ago?

I ship Becky and Jade not gonna lie

Ugh team lists. I'm calling it Zoe will have made it on despite not even trying out

Yup.

Wait she's reserve on Raven? Why? That's not a good move?

Ep 7:

Mia is such a bitch

Ok Raven doesn't like water, and I confidently predict this is an important plot point

Ooooh Mia just got rejected

So now the Ghost Pony is Emerald

Zoe you are so naive Marcus is asking you to the dance

Becky I love you and the mystery tortilla

Mia hasn't made the cover, I can predict.

I do feel a bit bad for Mia with her not very good father who isn't really there for her

That colour of green is a really nice colour of green. It brings out Pin's eyes. Ew, stop, why am I like this

Pin stop

Is zoe about to be murdered?

I thought the ghost pony was called Pebbles?

Why has Ted suddenly warmed up to Zoe?

Unlocking Raven's backstory

Pins name is actually Peter. Huh

It's nice that the moor pony is getting better enough to eat an apple

She's not on the cover

Pin likes Zoe and I ship it

Tedward

She's on her way to Steel (lol) his heart

Perfect - let the horse who is scared of water jump the water jump what could go wrong. Throw in an inexperienced rider into the mix and it's a perfect combination.

Wait this is actually kinda sweet

A funeral for Emerald is lovely

But the name Edward begins with an E so maybe E wasn't just Emerald

You could fall. IN LOVE. WITH PIN. OH MY GOD PLS

Wait what

Why has the photographer never heard of brightfields

Mia is so stuck up but I quite like her

I definitely did not need to take a 20 minute break just trying to find out how old Freddy Carter was, jesus.

Throwing stones at the windows, teenage stereotypes

They're cute

Ah, he couldn't say Peter, hence the Pin

Oh my god heartbreaking

Now they're going to the dance. Nice one

Oh god is Mia gonna do something to sabotage Zoe and Pin?

Holy shit is Ghost Pony real?

Ep8:

I actually quite like that yellow dress, not gonna lie

I love Becky and so does Jade

It's totally a date don't lie to yourself Zoe

Mia can get tae

Pin don't listen to her

She wouldn't tell you if it wasn't true though would she, Pin you imbecile

Rosie stop sabotaging, your mother is allowed to have friends

Oh shit they were a couple

Wait

What if it turns out Pin and Zoe are siblings

Wait no I'm thinking too much into this

Pin calm it

Marcus be happy

Pin... just.........

bob wyd

They're married.

"I already did" I mean....,

How are they upset by that?

Literally just talk to each other? This would make everything so much easier?

And Raven is still scared of water. Don't blame him, honestly

Ben and Rosie are evil geniuses

Becky is adorable and thinks safety goggles would help prevent death

She also thinks carrots glow in the dark

Wait how does Maggie know about the whole boys thing

Offscreen I guess

I mean I wouldn't wear that dress, but I guess it's okay?

Rosie fixing lights is not going to end well

Yup.

Where did ted come from? How did he get there so fast?

I mean Zoe actually pulls off that dress

Has Becky been murdered?

Oh yeah, Becky has a blog

I don't necessarily understand how or why a ghost pony is scary

Oh wait it's a person

Is it the horse thieves

It is the horse thieves

Why did they wait until dark? That would have been a long time to wait to capture the horse thief

Derek is a brilliant character

Who is very obviously in love with Sam

That barn actually looks pretty good

Pin went with Mia? That's surprising

Ted and Maggie are cute

Ben and Rosie are also cute

Derek and Sam are also a little bit cute

Piiiin don't be a diiiick

Those shoes don't really go with that outfit tho...

Rosie is in the spotlight though and I'm sure she's loving it

Mia go and just stop

Ooh thunder

Marcus is following Zoe who is following Pin who is going home

Oh wait Pin and Zoe are arguing in the rain. I may not be familiar with tropes but I'm pretty sure that they're about to kiss

And they're cute and I ship them

Marcus is just casually watching around the corner. Like a stalker

Was not expecting that?

Of course this is when the horse thieves take Raven

Ok but shouting after him is hardly gonna do anything?

Ep9:

I mean... it wasn't even her horse

That's so Raven

Wait they have security camera surely the thief will be ca- oh there was a power cut

But there was a back up generator?

Wait but Zoe is supposed to ride on Raven in the show? Assuming she has to

Rosie is so extra

Oh my god just like... idk kiss

That highlight tho

"That's what I love about you" pin, do continue

Pin you genius

So now they're off to look for this horse

Why didn't they just have this chat at the stables before they left and saved time?

"If the storm comes in again turn back" so the storm is gonna come in again and one or more of them aren't gonna turn back. Ok

"I am scared of the tooth fairy! What does she need all those teeth for? What's her plan?" Same Becky

Ben and Rosie have a handshake, this is cute

What is her plan

Becky is me with every single person I have a crush on

This is a significant character development for Mia

Ok so the only group not turning back is mia, susie, and Zoe

This is not going to end well

Mia.... Zoe can't control the weather?

That recording is in no way convincing

Wait how big is this island???

Either Mia or Zoe is going to get hurt

Ghost pony?

I mean this is just a bad horror movie now

Oh shit, firefly?

And Mia got hurt. Okay.

Wait so if Mia's hurt, she can't do the show?

Wait so the dad just turned up?

I like that there has been a character development now we sorta understand Mia's actions

So Mia can't ride

Wait what

Who is this and why is she here

Why is that so ominous

Ep10:

Rosie is so done with England

Sam is being pretty chill

Oh never mind

Marcus also has a crush

Still a Pin supporter tho

Rosie is brilliant

I would wear every single outfit pin has worn this season, not gonna lie

Becky is not helpful

And a raven horseshoe? Really?

Wait... nah never mind

Wow the mystery lady from the jaguar was just suuuuper rude to pin

I'm with Ted - it's totally what he thinks

Oh shit wait is Sam a horse thief?

Oh she is! Okay

That was a twist

I did not see that one coming

Don't just ignore Pin?

So now she just tells her that Raven is still on the island? Okay

Yaaas Pin! Go with her!

What signal? You can't just say wait for my signal and then not say what the signal is?

Wait but Zoe is getting the stolen horse and can't ride

Wait pin what are you doing

Oh the horseshoe

Wait if Mia could have ridden anyway, why put Zoe on?

I get the whole sprained ankle thing but she's just doing it?

Oh look, clever parallels between Mia doing the show and Zoe escaping

But what happened to Pin

And Rosie, where is Rosie

Oh look, water

Any bets Raven overcomes his fear and makes it across

Well look at that!

Also there's pin, he looks so proud

Dereeeeeek how do you feel

Oh no, pin don't feel bad. It's only Marcus... well actually..

"Derek" "its officer wrigley" savaaaaage

Wait.... his last name is wrigley?!

Is this their secret hip hop routine?! Oh my god this is brilliant!

I'm calling it - they've won

Yeah

Everyone has just left Mia lmao

Pin didn't even ride why is he there?

SUSIE HAD A BOYFRIEND ALL ALONG

IM SHOOK

if there was a scout at the riding school, they wouldn't send a letter if they didn't let him in?

Of course he got in that just makes sense?

Why would they send him a letter telling him he didn't get in if he was scouted?? It makes no sense????

And they kissed. Wow. There was like, no build up for that, Zoe and Pin, however....

Wait so Zoe is still not interested?

And now she's going to Pin?

Throwback to the singing teapot

It Pin

Oh that was actually pretty funny? I guess? Nice one Pin

Wait what's happening

Haha Lavinia

Ah, back to old Raven/Midnight Blue i guess

What do you want her to do Pin, I don't???

Ok so this is not a satisfying ending

Pin... are you literally stealing a horse right now?

Okay this is a lovely scene and all but how realistic is this

"I won't let you" you can't stop her???

Wait what

Okay so she can stay in England or go to America

She's gonna stay

They'll get renewed for a season two and she'll stay

And fall in love with pin

Because reasons

Should I stay or should I go now

Of course Mia is gonna buy the stables.

To summarise: That wasn't as bad as I was expecting it to be - I actually quite enjoyed it.

#free rein #liveblog #i guess #I watched over four hours of this show in one sitting #I just thought I would post this here as like #a note to self? idk #long post

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news-mashable-yahoopartner-blog · 5 years

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Men's makeup brands are discreet — and all over Instagram

Nestled on my Instagram feed between a picture of a high school friend living their adult life and one of the Kardashians (they’re starting to blur together), was a sponsored post for “makeup for men” entitled War Paint. As I sat there watching the ad jump to life— a tattooed man covering his well-lit skin with a black beauty blender— I couldn’t get over the fact that it’s literally called “War Paint.”

Over time, I scrolled into more of these sponsored ads, like a weasel wandering into well-laid traps. Granted, I’m a gay guy who’s been wearing makeup since high school; some tinted moisturizer here, some blush there, but makeup nonetheless. So while I’m aware that these ads might not be enticing to me, per se, I wonder if they’d be enticing to someone who isn’t ready to step foot in a Sephora at any given moment.

If their ads are any indication, the brands I’m seeing on Instagram are attempting to change the narrative around men's makeup and open up that corner of untapped market that men represent.

First, it’s important to note that queer men have been wearing makeup openly for a while. And thanks to male beauty gurus on YouTube, like James Charles and Jeffree Star, it’s commonplace to scroll by a boy with a “full beat” on Instagram. “The boys in beauty aren't blurring gender—they're expanding it,” writes Koa Beck in Marie Claire.

SEE ALSO: 7 of the best light masks for acne, according to reviews

While mainstream media is no stranger to putting makeup on men (David Beckham was recently on the cover of Love magazine wearing green eyeshadow), it’s still a tough sell to the average straight guy. According to surveys, men are still quite hesitant to wear makeup.

The "Beauty Boys" are forcing brands to pay attention, making it clear that there’s an untapped market out there in the way of men’s beauty. Most recently, Chanel dropped a small line of makeup for men in late 2018. Forbes called it "revolutionary" and after GQ's style and grooming director tried it, he urged readers to "Wear more make-up." Charlotte Tilbury and Fenty have both put out official videos demonstrating their products on men in an attempt to grab male customers and sell them on the fact that they, too, could benefit from some beauty hacks.

High-end brands aren't a realistic option for men who are just beginning to dabble in makeup— $65 for a Chanel foundation is a leap, even if it is made for men. Charlotte Tilbury and Fenty, on the other hand, package their products in typical makeup fashion: shiny, colorful, and branded—characteristics that might make them weary candidates in a straight guy's toiletry lineup. And at the end of the day, it's all still makeup, a genre of grooming that doesn't open its door that widely to men, particularly straight men...yet.

View this post on Instagram

Our Concealer Swatches, what shade are you?

A post shared by War Paint (@warpaintformen) on Nov 15, 2018 at 3:07am PST

Altr conducted a men’s makeup survey with UK adults (1000 men and 1000 women) aged 18 to 35. When asked if they had ever worn makeup or concealer, 19 percent of men admitted they had, 20 percent admitted they'd thought about it, and an overwhelming 61 percent said they haven't worn any and haven't thought about it either. And 56 percent of men said they wouldn’t be comfortable approaching a makeup counter— a number that rises as the age bracket reaches 35.

Perhaps the most interesting tidbit from the survey is this: 10 percent of men said they knew “a lot” of guys who wore some sort of makeup, compared with 5 percent of women. This might point to the fact that men who do wear makeup only discuss it with other men.

I realized, though, that that’s the point of these discreet, direct-to-consumer operations selling makeup for men. Nobody has to know. Unlike the new male-focused beauty lines from cosmetic powerhouses like Tom Ford and Chanel, these Instagram-savvy brands are making it a point to steer clear of traditional beauty jargon when advertising their “tools.”

Stryx, a company that sells just concealer and tinted moisturizer, markets them as just that: “tools.” The packaging goes a step further to ensure that anybody who lays their eyes on it won’t really know what it is. The concealer stick looks like a pen or a stylus, sleek and black. The tinted moisturizer looks like it could be a number of things, also sleek and black. Perhaps a portable charger? A fancy deodorant, maybe?

On a desk, these "tools" blend in to their surroundings

Image: stryx

Stryx was founded by three men: Devir Kahan, Joe Lieberman, and Isaac Rami. In a phone interview with Mashable, they spoke about their approach to "cosmetics" and why their products have the potential to spearhead a new frontier in which men wearing makeup is the norm.

Instagram plays a huge part in their business plan, says Rami. "We’re able to directly speak to our consumers and change and develop things in the direction they wanna see it...it’s in our DNA."

According to Forbes, Instagram influencer marketing could be worth more than $2 billion in 2019. That’s a lot of money to be spent on people hawking products on a photo sharing app.

Altr is another brand selling makeup for men on Instagram and it’s more straightforward. Alex Doyle, the company's founder, puts more of an emphasis on marketing "makeup" straight up. "We tend not to shy away from the cosmetic angle, or promote discretion, like some other brands do," Doyle told Mashable over email.

The UK-based brand touts a fuller range of products, similar to Stryx’s, like Face Fix, a concealer-ish formula made for men using specific ingredients like China clay. The blemish fighting tool comes in a blue tin and upon first glance, it's easy to mistake it for a lip balm.

While packaging seems to be of utmost important to these brands, it’s hard to tell if it's really making a difference.

Barret Wertz, the style and grooming editor of AskMen claims that while shirking the stigma around these products may take time, it is doable. "Incorporating hyper-masculine copy or imagery is one very easy way of doing that, allowing men to buy something that inherently looks masculine, while still receiving the benefits of makeup," he says.

Altr's answer to concealer: "Skin Fix"

Image: altr

Altr's moisturizer, containing a "subtle whiskey extract," is a winking example of a product made by men, for men. "I’ve always really enjoyed whiskey personally which was a big reason behind it," Doyle admits. But it's not just for marketing purposes. "The whiskey infusion helps our key soothing ingredients such as Chamomile and Aloe Vera 200x properly absorb into the skin," Doyle claims.

While that may sound like marketing hoo-ha, it’s actually not. Mintel, a leading market intelligence agency, conducted a survey in 2017 that found that men do pay attention to ingredients. “Natural” is the “top attribute” that men look for on packaging of personal care products. Whiskey, it seems, might actually persuade customers to follow through with a purchase.

Stryx’s nod to hard liquor comes in a different form: the shade selection. While their range is weak (they’re planning to expand it soon), it’s the way users choose their color that stands out. To select a shade, users can pick between three different tumblers filled with ice. "We see our whiskey glasses as interesting and different, but many of our customers don't even realize that it's different or unique, per se, as it's their first time thinking about cosmetics and shades," says Kahan.

Light Cognac, Medium Mahogany, and Dark Eclipse make up the shade range.

Image: Stryx

With men's cosmetics is potentially a massive emerging market, it's hard to tell whether these particular brands will thrive. Wertz doesn’t think makeup will ever be a staple in the average straight man’s routine. "I don’t think you’re ever gonna see a guy with a fully beat face who’s going to work at a bank," he laughs, "that’s probably not gonna happen."

Yet, with only a couple products to their names, these companies have managed to get their feet in a door that didn’t exist, say, five years ago.“While California is our biggest market, demand is actually surprisingly widespread across the country, with a lot of orders coming from southern states like Texas,” says Doyle about Altr’s reach.

"We have not found that a specific age buys our products more than others, and our customers range in age from 18 all the way to 50,” notes Kahan. “We have delivered Stryx orders to customers everywhere from Apple headquarters and the tech sector, to actors and directors, to "strait-laced" professionals on Wall Street or in law."

Somewhere between Bear Grylls and James Charles is the everyman. The one who just wants to wake up, go to work, and fit in with society. If having a clear face comes naturally to them, great. But what if it doesn’t? What if they suffer from acne scars? What if they’re just naturally a little ruddy?

Those questions might not be easily answered, but some should find solace in the fact that the solution could be just a click away.

Editor's note: Mashable and AskMen are both owned by Ziff Media Group.

#_uuid:d73455b7-56e0-323c-866f-91e4058ef82c #_category:yct:001000002 #_lmsid:a0Vd000000DTrEpEAL #_author:Harry Hill #_revsp:news.mashable

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deadcactuswalking · 5 years

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REVIEWING THE CHARTS: 7th April 2019 (Billie Eilish, Lil Nas X, Ariana Grande)

We actually have a pretty busy week to cover today, with five new arrivals, one of which is in the top five, another of which is a total meme that just hit #1 in the States. There’s also a tragedy less lighthearted we’ll have to talk about, but for now, let’s discuss the top 10, because there’s been somewhat of a shake up.

Top 10

That shake-up isn’t going to affect Lewis Capaldi still at the top of the charts for a sixth week, as “Someone You Loved” continues its reign. I hope it gets overthrown pretty quickly because the song is pretty painful on its own and it does not bear well with me after the overplay.

Our shake-up starts just at the runner-up spot, however, as from her worldwide #1 album, WHEN WE ALL FALL ASLEEP, WHERE DO WE GO?, debuting at number-two is “bad guy”, her fourth UK Top 40 hit, second Top 10 and first ever top five. We’ll talk more about it later.

This means that Rag ‘n’ Bone Man and Calvin Harris’ “Giant” is down one space to number-three.

Tom Walker was hit with an identical loss, with “Just You and I” down to number-four...

...as was “Sucker” by Jonas Brothers, also down to number-five.

Thanks to the album, “bury a friend” by Billie Eilish had a large boost up 14 positions to number-six, which is a new peak after its debut at number-seven.

Speaking of number-seven, Dave’s “Location” featuring Burna Boy is down one spot this week.

Steel Banglez’s “Fashion Week” with AJ Tracey and Mo Stack doesn’t suffer nearly as much as I thought it would this week, just moving down one position to number-eight off the debut.

Ariana Grande, the only real competition for Billie Eilish within the top 10, seems to have been hit more than anything else here, as her song “break up with your girlfriend, i’m bored” has been pushed down four spots to number-nine.

Finally, we have “Piece of Your Heart” by MEDUZA and Goodboys rapidly moves up the charts, up a whopping 22 spaces this week to #10, becoming each artists’ first top 10. I don’t know why, but I’m not necessarily complaining, it’s a good song, I’m just kind of confused about its incredible boost in popularity this week, maybe a commercial placement. That seems to help a lot of these EDM tracks from relative nobodies rack up chart points.

Climbers

There are literally no climbers outside of the two already discussed in the top 10.

Fallers

On the other hand... sigh, let’s sort this by genre as I try to do whenever we have a massive amount of losses.

In pop and dance, “Walk Me Home” by P!nk was walked down five hills to its home at #14, “Don’t Feel Like Crying” by Sigrid is also down five to #18, as is “Don’t Call Me Up” by Mabel at #21, while “Dancing with a Stranger” by Sam Smith and Normani is down six to #27. Ariana Grande’s “7 rings” also continues its fall down nine to #38.

In hip-hop and R&B, NSG and Tion Wayne’s “Options” is down seven to #17, “Wow.” by Post Malone exits the top 20 finally, down five to #22, “Disaster” by Dave featuring J Hus loses album release steam down eight to #23 (as does “Streatham”, also by Dave, down 11 to #33), “Keisha & Becky” by Russ splash and Tion Wayne is down six to #25 off the debut and “Please Me” by Bruno Mars and Cardi B is down seven to #32.

Dropouts & Returning Entries

“Nights Like This” by Kehlani featuring Ty Dolla $ign is out from #33, “Kitchen Kings” by D-Block Europe is out from #34, “Think About Us” by Little Mix featuring Ty Dolla $ign is out from #35, “MIDDLE CHILD” by J. Cole is out from #36 due to cuts to its streams’ importance on its chart placement, “Sunflower” by Post Malone and Swae Lee is out from #37 and “How it Is” by Roddy Ricch, Chip and Yxng Bane featuring the Plug is out from #40. Good riddance.

Also, Billie Eilish’s “wish you were gay” returned to #13, reaching the top 20 at a new peak. Since this is the lowest Eilish song on the chart and it was released prior, that means there is no album bomb from Eilish; this, “bury a friend” and “bad guy” are the highest-performing songs and that’s all the UK chart allows.

IN MEMORIAM

On March 31st, 2019, a man named Ermias Joseph Asghedom was shot six times in the parking lot of his own clothing store, once in the head. Approximately 30 minutes after he was transported to the hospital, he was pronounced dead. That man was Grammy-nominated rapper Nipsey Hussle, murdered fresh off of the release of both his single “Racks in the Middle” with Roddy Ricch and Hit-Boy as well as his album, Victory Lap, which had failed to grab the Best Rap Album Grammy Award the month prior, having his life at the peak of his career cut short unjustly by gang violence which he had since made incredible efforts to put in the past and distance himself from, making positive and charitable contributions to his hometown ever since, to the point where the Crenshaw and Slauson intersection has been named Nipsey Hussle Square in his honour. His memorial service has been held today, April 11th, and he’s since been buried, at only 33 years old, leaving two children from a long-term relationship with Lauren London behind to carry his legacy. While I was not amazed with Victory Lap, I thought I’d discuss one of my favourite tracks from his last ever record released in his lifetime.

“Dedication” – Nipsey Hussle featuring Kendrick Lamar

Produced by Mike & Keys, Rance and MyGuyMars – Peaked at #93 in the US

First off, this oily beat is pretty beautiful, with reversed and manipulated soulful vocal samples backing some really slick keys and piano loops, giving off a great West Coast vibe that was Nipsey’s signature style. Nipsey’s first verse is an intense way of introducing the listener to the subject matter, with an intricate depiction of Nipsey’s life as a youth trapped in the ghetto, with a nice beat switch-up in the last few bars. The short chorus is barely a hook, but Nipsey gives a surprisingly great singing performance on the track, and it has a drop of sorts where Alexandria Dopson and Garren Edwards show off some vocal power in the midst of Nipsey’s frustrated grunt-screams, which I like to think are representative of how he felt when he thought he could never make it out of the streets, but the chorus is about how he finally broke himself free of its chains – dedication, hard work plus patience, invoking imagery of the abolishment of slavery used as wordplay throughout Nipsey’s third verse. Kendrick’s great albeit oddly-mixed verse references his come-up as well, but also the death of his grandmother how when he was suggested to make a song with Nipsey Hussle because of how they were both Crips, he responded by emphasising how he’s not just a gang member, but a man too, and after his death and some of the negative comments I have seen about Nipsey mentioning his past, is a stronger message than ever. The best part of the track is when Kendrick’s verse is interrupted by some 808 stabs, and the instrumental transforms into a semi-chopped and screwed shell of what it was, with echoing vocals from Dopson fading out before Kenny comes and sings in a janky flow that is trippy yet also pretty elegant and makes sense considering how it transitions from Nipsey and Kendrick talking about their history in gangs and Nipsey’s final verse about how satisfied he is with how his music, or what he says are is spirituals, have brought him into fame and luxurious life after about 30 years of barely making it by. I love the line where he references not only his friend YG’s album but the popular local saying, “Stay dangerous”, as he was educated by the hood into believing that he had to be feared to be safe, as well as his bars about how him owning his own masters is his way of abolishing what had shackled him as a teenager and as a young adult. The song ends with another repetition of the anthemic hook as a book-end, as we are treated to a relaxed instrumental featuring piano melodies layered on top of each other and Nipsey laughing in joy as he’s finally “Made it out”, with sound effects of dogs barking and general civilian life surrounding the melodic finish to a fantastic song.

This the remedy, the separation / 2Pac of my generation, blue pill in the f***in’ Matrix / Red rose in the grey pavement / Young black n***a trapped and he can’t change it

RIP Nipsey Hussle, August 15th 1985 – March 31st, 2019.

Now, on a lighter note...

NEW ARRIVALS

#40 – “MONOPOLY” – Ariana Grande and Victoria Monét

Produced by Social House and Tim Suby – Peaked at #6 in New Zealand and #70 in the US

Why Ariana Grande seemed it fit to release this song as a non-album single on Monday, I’ll never know, but I’m not going to blag on about that as Grande released this single and its amateurish video as seemingly a joke, right? It was on April Fools, and was coined “a treat for the fans”, with a video that had a budget of less than $10, as well as being both sonically and visually meme-heavy, so I don’t think it should be taken any seriously and rather just as a fun celebration of Grande’s success, featuring rap verses from her lead songwriter and best friend for some reason. It’s Grande’s 20th Top 40 hit over here and Victoria Monét’s first ever credited appearance on the Top 40, and you can tell their level of success by just their performances on this song, as Grande gets to show off the vocal prowess and is provided with both the intro and outro as well as all the multi-layering, while Monét’s expressions of her personality are relegated to the singular actual rap verse (Which she still shares with Grande) and Auto-Tuned ad-libs that are literally just sped-up sentences, as well as a messy Nutty Professor reference. The beat is pretty lightweight, with a couple vocal samples and cloudy synths hidden behind a trap skitter, but it’s fitting to back the nonsensical lyrics here, all of which only work because of the charisma the girls ooze from their vocals, despite the imbalanced vocal production. And, yeah, the lyrics here are awful, as expected. First of all, the refrain/pre-chorus rhymes “Where you been?” with itself three times, barely fitting the lyrics into the meter by scrambling the word “GPS” into a Twista-like chopper flow for like a second until going back to the droning, saccharine delivery. Let’s look at some highlights.

Bad vibes, get off of me / Outta here with that f***ery

Sorry, I just love the visual in the music video of Monét and Grande literally swatting away the “F***ery”, it’s pretty cute.

I swerve both ways, dichotomy / I like women and men

This painful, forced reference to Monét’s bisexuality is so blunt and to the point that when Grande says it, it’s hilarious. Imagine coming out in a loosie trap single that barely counts as a song and not an interlude. I do kind of like how straightforward the line is, to be honest, it’s almost anthemic... maybe I’m thinking too much into this.

Then we hit the bank, making dumb investments, for the win

“For the win”? I didn’t expect a song saying, “For the win” to make the Top 40 ever, but, sure, let’s roll with it. What does Ari say?

And if they try come stopping me, I’ll show them my discography (Yeah, yeah)

Okay, that’s kinda clever—

Even though we gave up that 90%, for the win, go!

Nevermind, they said, “For the win”, again.

This been buildin’ up, I guess this friendship like Home Depot

Yeah, nope. Next song.

#39 – “Old Town Road” – Lil Nas X

Produced by YoungKio, Trent Reznor and Atticus Ross – Peaked at #1 in the US

Oh, great, another meme song. Well, at least I can say this – where were you when a country-trap fusion from a former Twitter comedian turned rapper that samples a Nine Inch Nails guitar loop and was later remixed by Billy Ray Friggin’ Cyrus became the most popular song in the entirety of Northern America thanks to TikTok memes and a racism scandal? The whole situation is so loony to me, but I respect Lil Nas X and YoungKio for being so relaxed and chill about the whole fiasco, especially when it started getting bigger and bigger, becoming the shortest number-one song in America since 1963, with a runtime of only one minute and 54 seconds, disregarding the remix of course. Is it a country song? I mean, obviously, it’s a country rap song, nobody’s arguing that, and that’s got country in its name so yeah, in my opinion, if Nelly and Tim McGraw count when they released what was essentially an R&B song, this counts, even if it’s essentially just a trap song about horses. It actually paints a pretty interesting lone cowboy story inspired by Red Dead Redemption 2 but, who cares? It’s a meme, alright, and for now it’s pretty funny. It’s got a really catchy hook/intro, with an effective refrain as well as verses that much like “MONOPOLY”, were probably written in less than five minutes but they work, and that’s all that really matters. I like how his voice sounds in the muffled outro, but really, there’s not much to it. It’s a fun beat with a great sample that Billy Ray Cyrus takes advantage of entirely and bodies. His flow is stiff but so is the stunted beat so it fits together quite nicely, and the additional choruses add some needed meat to the track, as does the banjo and the whistling at the tail-end of the outro... but we’re not judging the remix just yet, and on its own merits, “Old Town Road” is nothing all too special.

#26 – “Better Man” – Westlife

Produced by Steve Mac – Peaked at #2 in Scotland

Westlife released a second single in 2019, after their last single three months back debuted in the Top 20 and did insanely well in radio and sales... in 2019. This new single, produced by Steve Mac, has an orchestral version, and is set to be on their new album Spectrum which was announced to be released on 6th September, 2019. This new single is their second to reach the Top 40 in 2019. It nearly peaked at the top spot in Scotland, in 2019, and has had success all over Britain in the week of release, which may I add, was in March 2019. I refuse to believe Westlife will have a resurgence in 2019, and although I mostly believe that charts are ran by impressionable teenagers, this proves that Mom-pop is safe in the midst of the new British trap-rappers who talk about murder and drug trafficking, and of course Gothic art pop starlets that aren’t even old enough to drink yet... and I’m not here for it. No, the orchestral version is not better, get this manufactured waste of time off the charts.

#19 – “Your Mrs” – JAY1

Produced by Coolie

So, just as I was actually starting to lighten up on British trap-rap – seriously, Tion Wayne’s stuff, especially “Options”, has been growing on me immensely and I loved Dave’s debut studio album – this comes out and debuts in the top 20, and it’s bloody awful. It’s literally one piano chord. It’s literally ONE. FREAKING. PIANO CHORD. Through the whole song. There’s a trap skitter as well after the beat doesn’t transition to the drop after its intro and instead just fades out with a cheap pitch-shift effect, until we get to a developed version of the beat, and by that I mean it has two annoying high-pitched beep sounds and a bass that clips through the mix thanks to the vocals that are louder than everything else. For the most part it feels like it’s just JAY1 rapping over a hi-hat, and to be fair, that’s what most of it is. It’s not menacing, of course, because even if it was, literally in the first bar of the song, he’s joking. He won’t actually be luxurious enough to take your missus, as he says, and would rather just let the women watch him, I guess. He’s not interesting, and although there switch-ups to the instrumental that help make it more interesting, the more stretched-out flows he uses are absolutely painful. The subject matter is nonexistent, apparently he has an Australian side chick and NAV helps transport his cocaine. Oh, but do you hear that? There’s a flute... no, seriously, can you hear it? Because I can’t, really, I mean it’s just a pathetic loop probably stolen from some Creative Commons musician that somehow ended up in an official release, and it doesn’t last long. It comes back in the third chorus, where he’s multi-tracked with a pitched-down vocal and this would actually be menacing if he wasn’t just talking about how his girl has a big butt. If that voice was whispering about cold-blooded murder, then this song would be awesome... but it’s not. It’s weak flexing and bragging with a nonexistent beat from an incredibly uninteresting dude who doesn’t know to mix his bass properly. I hope to see this gone quickly, because this is dreadful.

#2 – “bad guy” – Billie Eilish

Produced by FINNEAS – Peaked at #1 in Australia, Canada, Czech Republic, New Zealand, Norway and Slovakia, and #7 in the US

This is the big #2 debut, the one I’m supposed to care about most, but mostly I’m just feeling lukewarm on both the big single and Eilish’s album as a whole, which felt structure-less and lacking of much substance as she gets wrapped in her own metaphors. This new song has got a vivid, shocking and quirky video, but Dave Meyers stole it from an indie magazine called Toilet Paper’s photo shoot so I suppose that has helped this song increase in popularity – nothing like some good controversy. The dark, bass-heavy and reverb-drowned groove here is actually really nice, and I love Billie’s vocal melody, especially when it’s multi-tracked with the fake finger-snaps in the background that are incredibly flat, and that bassline when it hits in the chorus is insane. The lyrics are kind of funny if anything, as Eilish references her melodramatic, emo image as she claims herself to be a “make-your-momma-sad, might-seduce-your-dad type”, priding herself in the cynical bad guy personality among pop music’s cutesy stylings we’ve been accustomed to. The eerie flute-like synth melody is pretty creepy and I love how it takes itself way too seriously despite the lyrics that are basically just Eilish being an edgy teenager, even with a post-chorus where she says, “Duh”, in a deadbeat manner followed by high-pitched gliding chopped-up vocal samples, and it’s all good, right? But then there’s a beat switch that just doesn’t freaking work. The pause from the original beat lasts way too long, so the transition feels incredibly forced, and the trap breakdown/drop means the song loses all momentum, especially with that annoying bird chirping sound that starts it off. There’s no real transition here, so Eilish’s offbeat delivery isn’t interesting and endearing, just kind of janky, with the whispering not being creepy but forced and tryhard. Without the drop, this’d be pretty cool though.

Conclusion

Wow, what a mixed week. Sadly, I can’t give Best of the Week to “Dedication”, so it goes to Lil Nas X for “Old Town Road” because it’s probably the most fun song here, with Ariana Grande and Victoria Monét snatching Honourable Mention for the so-bad-it’s-good mess, “MONOPOLY”. Worst of the Week should be obvious as it goes to JAY1 for “Your Mrs”, but Dishonourable Mention is harder, so I’ll give it to Westlife for the sake of tradition. See you next week!

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pageantcast · 5 years

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PageantCast Mail Bag: 01/16/2019

New Post has been published on http://www.pageantcast.com/2019/01/pageantcast-mail-bag-01-16-2019/

PageantCast Mail Bag: 01/16/2019

We know no one uses mail anymore, but here in the mailbag we put a selection of Instagram posts, Facebook posts and Twitter posts that we’ve been tagged in.

Here’s this week’s selection:

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Finishing out the weekend by celebrating that both of my Teen Clients made Top 5 at Miss Teen NV USA. @tinleymcwhorter absolutely nailed her onstage question! (Video at the end) I couldn’t have been more proud of how far this blonde bombshell has come in the last few months. It’s always my pleasure to be a part of my client’s pageant journeys. My eyes literally swelled with tears as I watched @tinleymcwhorter step forward, and slay that answer! Tinley left everything on that stage last night, placing 3rd runner-up in a strong class of teen pageant contenders. 💕 @acireciel beautifully graced that stage and brought home the title of @missnvteenusa. Erica’s platform is about ensuring that people everywhere will have opportunities for education. She, herself, was the recipient of a scholarship, which has changed her life. So proud of you @acireciel! You will be a great representative for NV this year! It was my pleasure to have sponsored your interview coaching. 👑😘. Congratulations to @rissrose2 for both of your titleholders walking away Nevada State winners. I don’t know of a harder working woman in the pageant industry! @rissrose2 continues to help create avenues for girls to pursue their dreams. Congratulations to @tiannatuamoheloa your new Miss NV USA. @missnvusa 💗 I want to give a big shoutout to @britneybarnhart and @carolinaaurrea for a job well done representing NV this last year! Both are gorgeous, intelligent and sweet. Britney placed Top 15 at Nationals and Carolina was 2nd runner- up at Nationals. To say that we are all proud of them is an understatement. 👑💕 Lastly, I got to spend the day giving hugs and kisses to some of my favorite pageant babes. It was so much fun seeing my pageant girls. “Find your tribe, love them hard.” @tinajarchow @karicarlsondeike @kamideike @mnvoteenlasvegas @autumn_mckissick @wishtheturtle @mnvoteen_unlv @jill_barnhart @pageantlife_coach @alexa_fahd @rissrose2 #pageant #pageantcoach #queen #motivated #dedicated #driven #sisterhood #beautyandbrains #lovemygirls #mysquad

A post shared by Tracy Rodgers💃👑 (@legalnurse1) on Jan 7, 2019 at 9:03am PST

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🎉 THE PAGEANT EVENT 🎉 Such an awesome 👏 day with 250 women from all over the country! On behalf of Marleighs Ministry and Marleighs Angel Gowns as the International Spokeswomen thank you for all your donations and a huge thank you to Taylor Gem for all your work!!! Cheryl Smukowski and Michelle Becker wow is all I can say about today!!!! Thank you for providing such a wonderful event that we can all come together ❤️❤️❤️ Autumn Kastein I think we did killer with the fashionshow and can’t wait to rock it next year!!! 💥💥💥 love you 😘 Crystal Cavey thank you for absolutely everything this weekend from road tripping together, being one of my roomies, helping with my fashion show trunks and ALWAYS the great memories ❤️❤️❤️ love you to pieces!!!! Tiffany Christina and Sherlyn Fox best roomies ever!!!! Love you guys so so much!!! Loved meeting so many wonderful queens from so many systems too….Nicole Elizabeth so happy we finally connected 🙌🏻🙌🏻🙌🏻 I just adore you! Thank you to all my wonderful models that rocked the runway wearing GO BLING Yourself!!!!! Xoxo #pageant #communityservice #model #thepageantevent #sash #crown #queen #titleholder #mission #womenempowerment #womeninspiringwomen #womensupportingwomen #styleblogger #fashionblogger #pageantmakeup #makeup #hair #stylist #fashion #fun @mrsnicolecook @crystalcavey @mrswisconsinunitedstates @jaynelblack @emma.loney @sherlyn707

A post shared by Ms Illinois USC (@msillinoisuscontinental2019) on Jan 7, 2019 at 10:48am PST

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Best of luck this weekend to this green-eyed bombshell, @tinleymcwhorter! This gorgeous soul, also known as “Tin-can,” brings a whole new meaning to “fighter.” Embracing her challenges in life, and facing them head-on, her platform, “Blind To Disability,” is based on her personal story of hope and inspiration. This amazing young woman reminds me every time we speak how amazing pageant girls really are. I’m so happy to work with and feel inspired by this beauty. Good luck Tinley! #pageant #pageantlife #queen #blindtodisability #tincan #motivated #fighter #greeneyes #model #modeling

A post shared by Tracy Rodgers (@pageantlife_coach) on Jan 4, 2019 at 8:51pm PST

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Backstage at the Parade of Nations for Mrs Universe 2018 #transcontinentalpageants #mrssouthamerica #mrsuniverse #mrsuniverse2018 #mrsuniverseltd #pageantprosllc #sabrinapinion #mrsgalaxy #mrsworld #mrsunitedstates #mrsglobe #mrspageants #missology #pageantcast #mrsinternational #mrsearth #mrspetiteworld

A post shared by Shelley (@shelleyspics) on Dec 9, 2018 at 9:49am PST

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Happy New Year 🥳 #cometome2019 😍 #bestisyettocome

A post shared by Јεƞƞa 🖤 (@jennarenee85) on Dec 31, 2018 at 6:39pm PST

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🎉This is such a privilege and honor to be your COVER MODEL for Pageant Platform Magazine January/February 2019 Issue!!!! I want to send my deepest thanks to Kerry Kathleen for giving me this wonderful opportunity!!! I am so grateful!!! Be sure to read my interview in the link below Check them out on Facebook and online at : www.pageantplatformmag.com 📸by DazzleShot Images Owner Radh Balwan 👗by Mac Duggal Styled by Crystal Cavey #pageantplatformmagazine #covermodel #pageant #titleholder #msillinoisuscontinental2019

A post shared by Ms Illinois USC (@msillinoisuscontinental2019) on Jan 8, 2019 at 2:38pm PST

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Inhale faith Exhale doubt 💜💙💚💛 Miss ECO Georgia 2019 * * * * * * @missecointernational @missecous @glamgreenpageants @macduggal @bodybycraig @heathersumlin @pageantplanet @pageants.news @thepageantspotlight #journeytothecrown #roadtothecrown #pageant #befearlesslyyourself #beyourownsuperhero #beautypageant #beauty #WomenEmpower #nofear #nodoubt #thisisme #picoftheday #queen #photooftheday #glamgreenpageants #missecointernational #missecousa #missecogeorgia #makeup #curlyhair

A post shared by RACHEL STACY (@rachelleighstacy) on Jan 8, 2019 at 8:14am PST

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A post shared by Saryna Ritter (@sarynalouise) on Jan 7, 2019 at 10:51am PST

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Best of luck to this beauty @acireciel who will grace the Miss Nevada Teen USA Stage this weekend. Erica was our very first Tivoli Teen NV winner and I was honored to work with her as a sponsor of the Miss Tivoli and Miss Silver State preliminaries. This beauty is working her platform to ensure that everyone has an opportunity to further their education and career paths. Best of luck @acireciel! #pageantry #pageantcoach #pageantlife #education #beautyandbrains #model #nevada

A post shared by Tracy Rodgers (@pageantlife_coach) on Jan 5, 2019 at 7:49am PST

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Make an effort for yourself and believe in your inner goddess! 📸- @donzartinauz #blue #princess #jasmine #disney #goddess #grecian #love #royal #power #effort #selfimportance #selfworth #this #pose #brunette #girls #me #life #live #pageant #beauty #must

A post shared by Jasmine Farlow (@jasminefarlow) on Jan 4, 2019 at 8:00pm PST

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27 days until I leave with @bodybycraig and @edawn5 to Las Vegas compete for @missecous 💜 👑 Miss ECO Georgia US 2019 @glamgreenpageants @missecointernational * * * * * * * @heathersumlin @mental.management @realpaulashugart @missusa @missuniverse @dalesmiththomas @pageantplanet @pageants.news @roadtomissusa @missusafans @pageantupdatemissusa @thepageantspotlight #journeytothecrown #roadtothecrown #confidentlybeautiful #pageant #befearlesslyyourself #beyourownsuperhero #beautypageant #beauty #WomenEmpower #nofear #nodoubt #thisisme #quote #quotes #quotestoliveby #quotesdaily #dailyquotes #crown #crownup #misscongeniality #highheelhopedealer #internationalpageants #lasvegas #cairo

A post shared by RACHEL STACY (@rachelleighstacy) on Jan 11, 2019 at 12:46pm PST

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There’s a pageant for every woman… let’s do this babes. 2019 is your year!!!#pageantry #pageantcoach #pageantlife #2019

A post shared by Tracy Rodgers (@pageantlife_coach) on Jan 10, 2019 at 10:52am PST

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Best of luck to this gorgeous Australian beauty @missintercontinentalaus18. I had the pleasure of helping this beauty get ready for her National Pageant. She leaves tomorrow for the Philippines to compete for @missintercontinentalorg. This amazing, hard working, passionate and dedicated young woman is bringing her darling accent and fierce competitive side to that International Stage. Best of luck Mikaela! 👑💗 #pageantry #pageantlife #pageantcoach #australiangirl #brainsandbeauty #international #australia #gorgeous #model

A post shared by Tracy Rodgers (@pageantlife_coach) on Jan 4, 2019 at 9:12pm PST

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What being a true Queen is really all about. #queening #pageant #pageantlife #quotes #pageantcoach #alwaysgrowing #motivated

A post shared by Tracy Rodgers (@pageantlife_coach) on Jan 4, 2019 at 9:06pm PST

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✨So honored to be the cover model of @officialcrownsmagazine !!!!! Make sure to check out their page and website at: www.crownsmagazine.com Photo 📸by @dazzleshotimages Earrings👑 by @sparklestudiollc Gown💃 by @macduggal @ieenaduggal Styling 💁‍♀️by @crystalcavey and @darrenkeddy Makeup💄 by @angelreyesbeauty Hair 👱‍♀️by @sarynalouise @msillinoisuscontinental2019 @uscontinentalpageants #pageant #covermodel #model #pageantmakeup #pageanthair #gown #dress #red #blue #white #makeup #hair #magazine #editorialphotography #fashionblogger #styleblogger #style #fashion #fun #reddress #like #follow #life

A post shared by Ms Illinois USC (@msillinoisuscontinental2019) on Jan 4, 2019 at 12:14pm PST

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Best of luck to this beauty, @queendanielledanielle as she competes for @usoa_miss_utah tomorrow. Danielle has worked so hard, sharing her platform, “Remember You Are Beautiful.” I’m so proud to be part of Danielle’s pageant journey and gained another beautiful friend. This gorgeous single mother epitomizes hard work, dedication, compassion and strength. Best of luck @queendanielledanielle 💗👑 #pageantqueen #queen #pageantlife #pageantcoach #motivated #determined #compassionate #brainsandbeauty #blonde

A post shared by Tracy Rodgers (@pageantlife_coach) on Jan 4, 2019 at 8:24pm PST

#jennarenee85 #legalnurse1 #msillinoiscontinental #PageantCast Mail Bag #pageantlife_coach #Rachelleighstacy #Saryna Louise Keddy #Saryna Ritter #sarynalouise #shelleyspics

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boobtubedude · 7 years

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The Tournament Of The Archomentals: Part 1

As background, which I may spell out later: I started DM’ing a game of Dungeons and Dragons last summer. It was my first time ever playing the game, AND I was running it. I got a few friends who were interested and we all kind of learned as we went.

We started playing the pre-made intro adventure “Lost Mine Of Phandelver” in June, and segued into the “Curse of Strahd” about two months after that. I led a five-month campaign in which the vampiric Big Bad ended up sneezing to death, because Dungeons and Dragons is a weird game sometimes. This is the third arc, which narratively connects the adventures of four players and everyone they’ve met along the way. It’s my first attempt at a fully original campaign, although it borrows themes and plot points from some familiar pop culture pieces, as well as using some canonical D&D lore.

At this stage, everyone is a Level 10 character. These are the notes I normally type out to the players, as they literally cannot remember things between biweekly sessions, but thought it might be fun to start posting them for all to read. We had two new players decided to join the game this time around, which is why a tournament celebrating eight gods has six participants. I bet you’d ask because the players asked and were kinda asses about it.

The story picked up right at the end of the last session, with the gnome Garrick hurrying over to your campsite. He noted that he was excited but a little annoyed you guys waited so long to come back. Turns out what felt like a few weeks for you was 10 years in Neverwinter. During that time, your efforts at Wave Echo Cave have essentially turned Neverwinter into a rich, bustling ecosystem. And since then, you have become folk heroes that helped turn this place from Brookyln in the 1980s to Brooklyn now. (Lots of skinny jeans in Neverwinter now.)

Garrick had been holding your place in The Tournament of the Archomentals, which celebrates the 1,000-year anniversary of the defeat of the god Asmodeus. Asmodeus arose thanks to the assassination of Mystra, a goddess in charge of maintaining The Weave. The Weave is like the Force, only for magic, and killing her set off a chain reaction in which reality itself was warped and changed. Asmodeus was a decently powerful wizard before Mystra’s death, but The Spellplague (also known as the “Blue Breath Of Change”) then ensued after Mystra’s assassination turned him into a god-like figure. He turned the lands into hell itself with his empowered Ruby Rod, and was only defeated when the 8 archomentals (beings of supreme power in the earth, air, water, and fire planes of the multiverse) combined for the first time ever to defeat him.

The tournament involves four contests, after each week one of the five remaining teams is eliminated. Each contest celebrates of plane of elemental existence. Garrick’s an organizer, but not an architect, of the arenas in which these contests take place. He’s sort of a coach, but more of a fanboy at heart. (He may or may not have playing cards of the four heroes of Wave Echo Cave.) However, it won’t just be you in the contest: Since the challenges are designed for parties of six, Garrick has two more people that he’s gotten to fight along side you in order to balance out your team’s strengths and weaknesses. In no way did anyone think this was all major foreshadowing for the return of Asmodeus at the end of the tournament, which pleased the DM as he did not have to massively rewrite the narrative he had been planning for a month and a half.

As he takes you into the cathedral in which the tournament’s festivities are arranged, you see Mystra’s symbol above the cathedral door: it’s a red mist rising to the heavens, with seven stars surrounding it. The seven stars represent the seven schools of magic in this universe.

Inside, you see that Gundren Rockseeker (who gathered you all together on your adventure to find the Lost Mine of Phandelver) is one of the architects, along with three others:

Artin Battlehammer (Dwarf): A stout, keenly intelligent creature with an eye towards designing strongholds than looting them with treaure

Theren Amastacia (Elf): Think Cate Blanchett in LOTR, but somehow hotter

Kallista Orianna (Tiefling): about 6’, purple skin, horns that extend out from her eyebrows about 15’’ in a 45 degree angle. A large tail slinks back and forth behind her. She seems to regard you with distrust, whereas the others barely acknowledge your existence

From there, after exchanging pleasantries with Gundren, you met your two other teammates: a half-orc Fighter named Kieran Lonesword and a human Bard named Danfielding. You also meet a halfing named Vivienne, a gruff fashion designer/wizard who allows you all to create your own hero within the world of the Tournament. (In real-world parlance: This is a chance to re-spec your character.) Arzgarth Riffrocker the Paladin stayed the same. Peter Dinklage the Cleric switched his Domain to “Tempest” in order to indulge his inner Thor. Chad The Conqueror switched from Paladin to Warlock, which was badass on all levels. Demora the Rogue did not participate in this, as in real life she was very sick, so everyone established the canonical fiction that she had consumed room-temperature shrimp as her first meal in Neverwinter and was horrifically nauseous. This was not badaass on any level.

Vivienne also gave everyone a pin to help brand this team: a silver pin with the face of the monkey the group adopted in Barovia, Piccolo. Chad was greatly delighted by this development, as he loved Piccolo more than anything in the world. Garrick led you all the antechamber, a long hallway with paintings of the Archomentals on each side. He explained that this first exhibition honored the Earth Archomentals, Ogrémoch (generally eeevvvviiiiil) and Sunnis (generally pleeeeesssaaant). He told you that the fight was based on “Rock, Paper, Scissors,” and to avoid the dome protecting you from the audience that would be watching. Also, he noted that there was audience participation: Above the arena would be a wheel that would spin after everyone had completed a round of combat, in which something fun or terrible might happen.

You walk up to the final painting of the antechamber, and it’s of none other than Asmodeus himself. He’s painted as a twenty-foot figure crushing the hordes of fighters that had assembled to defeat him. In his hands is the Ruby Rod to which Garrick alluded earlier. This painting lifted up to reveal a circular platform inside, and a bright light illuminating it from above. Peter Dinklage kissed the three middle fingers of his left hand and held them up, because he’s a dick.

You all get on the platform, and ride it up. You see you’re in a dome that’s about 30 yards in diameter. On the periphery, two smaller but similar looking trees reside. In the center of it is a huge, beautiful tree. Facing it at forty-five degrees on each side are two stone statues, reminiscent of the Terracotta Army. It’s a beautiful, lush landscape, and your eyes go from that to realizing you’re surrounded on all sides by spectators. You can hear them, but the sounds are muffled due to the invisible dome. Due north in the crowd is a smallish section for the Tournament Architects, and the Wheel stands above them. The options on the wheel read:

Hale and Hearty

SkullCracker

Flight of Fancy

Ring Around The Posey

Amor-All

Broken Mirror

Well of Haste

Electric Slide

The fight begins when the fighters try to use magic to assess the area, which wakes up both the central tree and the stone golems. The tree does a lot of damage when it hurls a boulder at the entire party, forcing Danfielding to heal everyone up quickly. Just when it looks like the initial flurry was over, a dozen ropes descended from the top of the dome, and twelve men looking like Santa’s Elves gone to seed landed with a thud on the ground, wielding large sickles. “We’re the Scissors Gang, here to kick your ass!” the leader declared. Much head shaking was done by all at the DM’s voice for these creatures, but they said nothing, for lo, the DM had bought the pizza that night. Rock (golems), Paper (tree), and Scissors (Bastard Keebler Elves) had finally all assembled.

Combat continued for a few rounds. After the first, the audience wheel landed on Ring Around The Posey, which had the effect of switching all the elements to which these creatures were either vulnerable or immune. That wasn’t too obvious to the heroes, who mostly marveled at the fact that Kieran could seemingly roll nothing but twenties on her first night. The initial batch of Scissors Elves were eliminated fairly handily, as Peter and Danfielding teamed up to essentially roll the elves into the electrified dome like bowling pins, but the group couldn’t make their way to the tree (which had raised up the other two to help attack) nor make much headway with the golems.

Round two started with Flight Of Fancy, which made the entire arena zero-gravity. A new group of Scissor gangmembers floated down like a group of skydivers, which the DM erroneously called “plane jumpers,” because the DM had had a fucking week, so back off. Once again, Peter and Danfield feasted on these creatures, singeing them all with fire. Arzgarth teleported on top of a golem, and struck him down towards the earth. Kieran then curbstomped this sucker to death, and wove the newly-formed floating pebbles into a cape, because apparently half-Orcs have proficiency in Etsy. The DM granted Kieran a point of inspiration, because holy crap, you guys. The audience, on the other hand, threw up in their mouth a little at the violent (albeit creative) display before them.

Meanwhile, Chad decided to use his Warlock abilities to take over the mind of the tree, which it then ordered to hit itself with the boulder over and over again. Not only did the central tree take damage because of this, but so did the other trees. Everyone enjoyed telling the tree to stop hitting itself.

With the combatants earthbound for the next round, the wheel landed on Electric Slide, at which point lighting emerged from the Piccolo pins and singed every player. No one enjoyed that, not even Chad.

Finally, Chad realized he had a Warlock spell that could essentially incinerate plant life, which probably would have helped them out in the first round of combat. Game, set, match, ex-masochistic sentient tree. Garrick ran into the arena, pleased by the results. He noted that they came in second overall in terms of quickest victory, as another team had used that plant spell off the bat, which made things much easier.

Just then, the sky went dark, the wheel started spinning of its own accord, and glowed red from its central point. Just as soon as it started, everything went back to normal. The architects retreated hastily, and a nervous Garrick told the group to rest up for the next event in two weeks’ time.

#Dungeons and Dragons

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justmysicklypride · 7 years

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1-99

Jessie I swear to fuck 1: Do you sleep with your closet doors open or closed?Closed2: Do you take the shampoos and conditioner bottles from hotel?Duh it's free stuff of course3: Do you sleep with your sheets tucked in or out?Out4: Have you ever stolen a street sign before?Not yet5: Do you like to use post-it notes?Yes6: Do you cut out coupons but then never use them?No I always use them 7: Would you rather be attacked by a big bear or a swarm of a bees?A swarm of bees bc I read somewhere that if you encounter a bear you're definitely done for8: Do you have freckles?No9: Do you always smile for pictures?If it's not a selfie then yes10: What is your biggest pet peeve?When people compliment me (okay this doesn't really count but still) 11: Do you ever count your steps when you walk?Uh no?12: Have you ever peed in the woods?Nope13: What about pooped in the woods?No14: Do you ever dance even if theres no music playing?I probably have at some point but I don't remember15: Do you chew your pens and pencils?Yes but not always16: How many people have you slept with this week?None bc I hate other people17: What size is your bed?It's just a single regular bed?? Idk18: What is your Song of the week?The Reckless And The Brave by All Time Low bc it's the first one to pop into my head (idek if that's the song name but whatever)19: Is it okay for guys to wear pink?If it looks good on him I mean sure why not idc it's really about making it look good rather than the colour tbh20: Do you still watch cartoons?Of course21: Whats your least favorite movie?Snow White tbh I'm sorry 22: Where would you bury hidden treasure if you had some?I'm not telling you jeez what if I actually had hidden treasure and you end up finding it (for real though idk the bottom of the ocean?? Or someplace cool) 23: If you're a girl, bra size? If you're a guy, pants size?Wow this is probably gonna be embarrassing but B75, tbh idek what this even means like I just read off the tag thing24: What do you dip a chicken nugget in?I don't like condiments soz 25: What is your favorite food?Cake26: What movies could you watch over and over and still love?Idk I don't really like watching things for a second time27: Last person you kissed/kissed you?No one bc I don't like people28: Were you ever a boy/girl scout?Yes29: Would you ever strip or pose nude in a magazine?No30: When was the last time you wrote a letter to someone on paper?Year 9 bc we had to do a thing where we wrote a letter to ourselves and it would be given back to us three years later (I left the school so idk if I'm gonna get mine back tbh lmao) and we had the option of writing to our other friends as well so yh I wrote two other ones for my two closest friends back then, and some other ones for these basic af cunts who asked me to write for them so it looked like they had a lot of friends 31: Can you change the oil on a car?Yeah32: Ever gotten a speeding ticket?I can't drive33: Ever ran out of gas?Don't have a car34: Favorite kind of sandwich?I will eat any kind tbh I'm not picky35: Best thing to eat for breakfast?Cereal36: What is your usual bedtime?11-12pm37: Are you lazy?10000000% yes definitely this literally makes up more than half of my traits38: When you were a kid, what did you dress up as for Halloween?There were quite a few including a demon, a witch, an angel etc. 39: What is your Chinese astrological sign?Dragon 40: Are you horny?No41: Do you have any magazine subscriptions?No bc I'm broke42: Which are better legos or lincoln logs?Wtf is this legos definitely43: Are you stubborn?I can be a bit stubborn but I don't like to think that I am44: Who is better...Leno or Letterman?Ffs uhh Letterman.....?? I don't want to start anything lmao45: Ever watch soap operas?Sometimes when I'm bored as a kid and still watched Tv but not anymore46: Are you afraid of heights?No47: Do you sing in the car?Yes48: Do you sing in the shower?Yes49: Do you dance in the car?I mean I have but I don't do it often50: Ever used a gun?Nope51: Last time you got a portrait taken by a photographer?My graduation last year52: Do you think musicals are cheesy?Yes but that's the whole concept of it like it's meant to be cheesy53: Is Christmas stressful?Aren't all days stressful?54: Ever eat a pierogi?The fuck is that? *just googled it* if it's just a dumpling then yes but if it's a completely different thing then no55: Favorite type of fruit pie?Apple bc it's classic 56: Occupations you wanted to be when you were a kid?There were so many ffs: when I was a kid I wanted to be a singer in a band but I wanted to play guitar when I sang as well, then I wanted to be an artist, followed by a scientist, then a professional athlete, a fashion designer at one point, an architect, game developer, game tester, forensic scientist, software engineer, and right now I'm in university/college (or I will be next month) studying pathology and engineering sciences and will eventually become a doctor 57: Do you believe in ghosts?Yes58: Ever have a Deja-vu feeling?Yep59: Take a vitamin daily?Only when I'm sick 60: Wear slippers?Yes61: Wear a bath robe?Not frequently 62: What do you wear to bed?Pyjamas duh63: First concert?Never been to a concert and never will bc I don't like going to concerts64: Wal-Mart, Target or Kmart?Wal-Mart isn't a thing here in Australia so Kmart bc it's cheaper65: Nike or Adidas?Nike66: Cheetos Or Fritos?Never had either67: Peanuts or Sunflower seeds?Peanuts68: Ever hear of the group Tres Bien?Sounds familiar but that's probably bc those words actually mean something in Spanish (was it Spanish idk) so don't think so69: Ever take dance lessons?I've taken ballet, jazz, contemporary (idek if that's what it's called), and hip hop lessons in the past70: Is there a profession you picture your future spouse doing?Hopefully nothing illegal71: Can you curl your tongue?Yes72: Ever won a spelling bee?I've never been in one bc either there wasn't one or I thought it was for nerds so I didn't participate73: Have you ever cried because you were so happy?No74: Own any record albums?Nop75: Own a record player?Don't think so76: Regularly burn incense?No77: Ever been in love?I don't believe it exists so no78: Who would you like to see in concert?I don't even go to concerts but idk My Chemical Romance probably bc obvious reasons79: What was the last concert you saw?I don't go to concerts80: Hot tea or cold tea?Hot81: Tea or coffee?Coffee82: Sugar or snickerdoodles?What the fuck is a snickerdoodle I've never heard of/had that before so sugar83: Can you swim well?I mean if you throw me into the ocean I won't drown to death and can swim to safety84: Can you hold your breath without holding your nose?Yes85: Are you patient?Fuck no86: DJ or band, at a wedding?Band87: Ever won a contest?By won, you mean first place, so no. But I have gotten multiple awards Edit: never mind I have, when I was in year 9, I was in the school's string orchestra and we won first place representing the school in this music thing for group performances 88: Ever have plastic surgery?In the past? No. In the future? Ehhhh idk89: Which are better black or green olives?Olives can go die in a hole90: Can you knit or crochet?I forgot how to91: Best room for a fireplace?Living room duh92: Do you want to get married?Idk I mean it's the normal thing to do, and I'm a sucker for doing shit everyone else does but like I don't want to be tied down?? I want a free life ffs I don't want to have to constantly think how everything I do affects the other person and stuff fml I hate adulthood93: If married, how long have you been married?I'm not married94: Who was your HS crush?Some dickhead I was friends with95: Do you cry and throw a fit until you get your own way?No96: Do you have kids?No (thank god for that)97: Do you want kids?Yes but they're so high maintenance fml98: Whats your favorite color?Green99: Do you miss anyone right now?Nop

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cathrynstreich · 4 years

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6 Real Estate Marketing Lessons From Kim Kardashian

Love her or leave her, there is no argument that Kim Kardashian is a powerhouse marketer. With 165 million Instagram followers and 64.5 million Twitter followers (the highest in the world), Kim’s international social prowess makes her one of the largest brand influencers out there.

Whether or not you follow or tune in for the latest in Kardashian/Jenner/West drama, there are definitely lessons to be learned from her marketing expertise. As Kanye told GQ magazine, “In order to win at life, you need some Kim K. skills, period.” So… here you go:

Turning the Negative Into Opportunity It all started with a certain (cough) “leaked” video, but instead of retreating from the media attention, Kim embraced it, leveraged it and ultimately won a $5-million-dollar lawsuit that she used to invest in herself and her business opportunities.

Lesson learned: Things happen. Deals go bad. People write negative reviews. Don’t let it affect your focus. Pick yourself up, dust off, learn from the experience and find a way to make the best out of it.

Be (Overly) Confident Saying that Kim (and her wacky clan) project confidence is an understatement. They are over the top, regardless of whether it’s deserved or not. But you know what? A study at the University of Berkeley in California determined that people who project themselves in an overly confident way tend to be recognized and promoted more professionally because bosses tend to mistake confidence for talent. Hmm…

Lesson learned: You know that statement, “Fake it ’til you make it”? Do that.

Know Your Audience Kim has recognized two very important factors in a successful business. First, she is very aware of her assets and strengths. Second, she completely understands who her audience is and uses her assets and strengths to connect with her audience. That makes her “real,” relatable and authentic.

Lesson learned: Start by defining your business strengths, knowledge, interest, expertise. Now, take that knowledge and apply it to your target audience. Do the stars align? If not, you need to adjust until they do. Feel better now? Yes, we all do.

Real life example: I’m a fan of the relatable, blended brand presence of Geoff Brewer, a broker/owner in Nashville (a.k.a. Music City). Geoff not only runs a successful office in the area, but he’s also a professional musician who’s built his entire brand (and office) around his love of music and real estate. His office literally has a performance stage where you can find Geoff, friends, clients and his agents performing on a random weeknight—which is often documented on social media. Geoff has capitalized on his interests and strengths, and provides a snapshot of who he is both personally and professionally for his audience. Check out this video testimonial I shot of Geoff where he discusses the culture of his company, and you’ll see his enthusiasm for his passions and profession shine through. And you can check out his band here!

The Power of the Selfie If you believe that Al Gore created the Internet, then you can believe that Kim Kardashian invented the selfie. Setting self-glorification aside, Kim has mastered the art of the perfect selfie. Here’s the deal: She’s gorgeous, she’s the product (that touts other products), and you want to be/look/feel/live just like her. Her social presence is focused on building brand loyalty and helping her followers feel connected to her. She gives them a beautiful mix of carefully curated, high-level photos, along with a “taste'” of the personal life that supports her brand.

Lesson learned: Be real, be authentic, but also be aware of the types of content that resonate with your audience. Listings are great, but a listing that is accompanied by a taste of the lifestyle that can be achieved by purchasing that listing? Well… that’s cha-ching.

Real life example: Take a look at the Instagram feed of TJ Paradise, a luxury agent in Los Angeles. TJ’s good at teasing the stunning properties he represents along with a mix of his “blessed” life filled with worldly travels, celebrity friends, love, family and success. He connects well with his clients because he lives like his clients.

Engage Your Audience Kim does not need your fashion advice, but does that stop her from asking you for it? No! Why does she tweet out asking you what clothes she should wear for date night with Kanye? Because it creates conversation. Because it makes you feel like you matter. Because YOU are now part of that story. Wow… cool.

Lesson learned: Be inclusive. Create a story, and then invite people to join the story. Tease out content before you release it (like Kim asking for your advice and then later releasing photos of what she actually wore on that date with Kanye). Tease a story for that hot new listing that’s coming on the market.

It’s Not ALL About You Even though Kim is very overly confident, she also realizes that it’s not all about her. She’s thoughtful of her audience and she’s inclusive of her family (who also provide little snapshots and insights into her world). Yes, there’s a bigger, strategic marketing plan in play, but there’s still great takeaways.

Lesson learned: Focus on the needs/wants/interests of your audience (who you’ve specifically targeted above under “Know Your Audience”) and then be inclusive. Connect the dots between your audience and your sphere. Ask yourself, “How can I be of service?” and then make introductions to lenders, moving companies, along with local pizza joints and coffee shops. The real estate process may be the “norm” for you, but for your audience, it’s one of the biggest decisions of their entire life. Exceed expectations—and share a selfie while you do it.

Real life example: I love the sense of inclusiveness in Dale Chumbley’s “365 Things” blog where he focused on a different local business in his community every single day for an entire year. He used this to build SEO-friendly content for his website/blog, increase his online followers and position himself as the go-to real estate guy within each of the businesses he showcased. Genius! So genius that I enlisted this approach at 3sixtyfive.agency with our “Daily Dose of Marketing Awesomeness” direct to your inbox. You can register on our home page.

Wonder how your online marketing stacks up? Schedule 15 minutes with an Elevate Success Coach to walk through your current social media and website for some one-on-one tips.

Looking for a complete re-brand? Connect with the team at 3sixtyfive.agency for a consultation.

Bondilyn Jolly is a tech entrepreneur, investor and business leader. She currently serves as the VP of marketing at Elevate and the managing partner of 3sixtyfive.agency, a new full-service digital and creative ad agency servicing the real estate sector. She swears she has never once watched an episode of Keeping Up With the Kardashians.

The post 6 Real Estate Marketing Lessons From Kim Kardashian appeared first on RISMedia.

6 Real Estate Marketing Lessons From Kim Kardashian published first on https://thegardenresidences.tumblr.com/

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discountsaleggdb-blog · 5 years

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213hiphopworldnews · 5 years

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All The Biggest Rap Beefs That Dominated 2018

Getty Image / UPROXX STUDIOS

To say 2018 was one hell of a year, if not an outright exercise in developing an unfortunate tolerance to vapidity masquerading as innovation, simply isn’t enough. Everyone really went through it last year, and we most certainly have the scars to prove it. Still, at least we have music.

And despite what your resident purist or full-time naysayer might have you believe, 2018 was absolutely stacked with essential releases from artists spanning multiple generations, all moving more toward a welcomed genrelessness in their own way. Of course, tucked into that hectic release year was an equal assortment of artist feuds. While some were mere social media-based entertainment at its finest — i.e. Kanye West battling his own legacy — others were uniquely 808s & Heartbreaking.

Below, we’ve compiled a carefully curated retrospective on 2018 in beefs, feuds, and cult-backed legal threats, as a way of putting the year to bed. Enjoy.

Bhad Bhabie vs. Iggy Azalea

Hello, levity.

A full 10 months after initially dissing Iggy Azalea on the “Hi Bich” remix, concerned citizens woke up to reports that Bhad Bhabie had tossed a “drink” at Iggy during a Cardi B-hosted Fashion Nova event. Now, an entire book could be written on exactly how f*cked up and grotesquely salacious it was for multiple outlets to use the word “drink” to describe literal water thrown by a 15-year-old artist, but that’s not why we’re here.

The water toss did indeed happen, but — despite the immediate outpouring of memes — Iggy ultimately took the high road. “I’m not about to fight a kid in the club,” she later told fans on Instagram.

Still, regardless of how you feel about either artist’s discography, the memes were funny and so too was this entire exchange. We all need a little levity every now and again, especially while watching heroes (hi, Kanye!) fumble preposterously.

And as for those discographies, are we really going to pretend Iggy and Tyga didn’t kinda nail it with their oft-overlooked 2018 single “K.R.E.A.M”?

youtube

Cardi B vs. Nicki Minaj

It goes without saying (though I’ll certainly say it again here) that if you’re the sort of fan, general troll, and/or “music journalist” dumbf*ck who just loves pitting women artists against each other for no reason whatsoever, then you’re vile, man. Your opinion has no value. And like clockwork, plenty of idiots tried to pull this one as Cardi B made her way to the top with a strong debut album and a string of Billboard Hot 100 hits to her name. Almost immediately, the Nicki Minaj comparisons and lyrical over-analysis started, creating a narrative that neither artist themselves had publicly entertained at the time.

As you now know, that ultimately changed with a series of events including some candid remarks from Nicki during a Zane Lowe interview, a “MotorSport” revelation, a NYFW party run-in, some Queen Radio-provided context, an allegedly leaked phone number, and so much more.

Still, it’s hard not to throw at least some of the blame on the general public. Will we ever learn?

Drake vs. Pusha T

youtube

The vast ocean that contains the issues between King Push and the 6 God is, as my clumsy metaphor just made quite clear, extremely deep. One could easily go encyclopedic when attempting to summarize them all, so let’s just keep it fairly concise: Pusha T, whose Daytona also plays a central role in Kanye’s beef with his own legacy, took issue on “Infrared” with Drake’s previous use of writer Quentin Miller. We were then given Drake’s “Duppy Freestyle,” which also saw Ye receiving some of the retaliation heat, and a joking request from Pusha T for an invoice that Drake later actually publicly supplied in the name of “career reviving.”

But this year in Pusha x Drake will mostly be remembered for the outing of a son, some wildly controversial cover art, and some surprise finger-pointing at producer Noah “40” Shebib.

Sadly, this years-deep feud — which is possibly still going strong — never resulted in Pusha T going in over Drake’s Scorpion highlight “Summer Games.” There’s still time, Push.

Eminem vs. Machine Gun Kelly

youtube

Amazingly, this one inadvertently roped in Chicago’s noted rock ’n’ roll savers Fall Out Boy. As you’ll recall, unless you’re some kind of cretin who doesn’t Google “Fall Out Boy” while funneling coffee down your throat each morning, Machine Gun Kelly opened for the band on their Mania tour earlier this year. If a certain splash of headlines were to be believed at the time, MGK received a chorus of boos from the audience at one stop. This, of course, was alleged right in the middle of that whole Eminem back-and-forth that birthed the diss tracks “Not Alike,” “Rap Devil,” and the dramatically presented quote “Can we just pour some out for this old dumbass?”

However, Kelly later pointed out that footage of the booing incident in question had actually been salaciously edited to invent a narrative. While that speaks volumes for the post-truth era, it also speaks quite a bit on the fervency of Eminem fans even in the face of new material that’s mostly failed to not feel more acrobatic than artistic. Overall, there were no real winners here.

Lil Uzi Vert vs. Heaven’s Gate

Are y’all looking forward to Lil Uzi Vert’s next project “Eternal Atake”?! @LILUZIVERT pic.twitter.com/JlnnLPvZoi

— WORLDSTARHIPHOP (@WORLDSTAR) August 1, 2018

Somehow, Lil Uzi Vert’s Luv Is Rage 2 is only barely over a year old. Yet, with all that’s transpired in both Uzi’s career and music at large in the 14 months since, the world Uzi floats so effortlessly atop on his studio debut now feels like it’s been punted directionlessly into another galaxy. So, yeah, we’re still entirely empty-handed when it comes to previously teased full-length projects with Playboi Carti and Marilyn Manson. This year, however, did bring us an extended run of Uzi headlines that almost made up for it.

When teasing the better-feature-Manson Eternal Atake, Uzi took the liberty of utilizing some fairly obvious visual cues from the infamous Heaven’s Gate cult. Alongside a logo inspired by the cult’s notorious early internet presence, Uzi changed up the group’s well-known statement of intent on “the UFO Two” to include references to his own Luv, Rage, and Uzi. As a surprise to presumably most, the San Diego-based cult — i.e. the same one largely made famous for its mass suicide — still has a small number of surviving members. Furthermore, those two people aren’t Uzi fans. Eventually, the cult threatened Uzi with legal action. If this doesn’t feel like an ingenious lead-up to a full-on Manson collab album, then I don’t know what would.

6ix9ine vs. the Federal Government

pic.twitter.com/0F8IsKEGnN

— 6ix9ine (@6ix9ine) September 13, 2018

For the most serious entry on our list, we turn to an artist whose very existence has — for storied purists and younger listeners alike — proven to be a continued source of contention. While 6ix9ine’s commercial successes are numerous and inarguable, it was his presentation with which fellow artists seemed to most take issue.

Though not alone in his criticisms of 6ix9ine, YG stands out for a variety of reasons. In his 2018 video “Bulletproof,” for example, he referred to a 6ix9ine lookalike as a “pedophile.” This is a reference to 6ix9ine’s 2015 guilty plea of the use of a child in a sexual performance.

Then, months after Fat Joe warned him of such an outcome (and specifically noted that authorities could be “plotting” against him), 6ix9ine was arrested by federal authorities on racketeering and firearms charges. 6ix9ine’s legal team has argued that their client is merely “an entertainer who portrays a ‘gangster image’ to promote his music,” something detractors have similarly alleged since 6ix9ine’s rise. He has since pleaded not guilty, with a trial slated for September 2019.

At least for YG, none of this is cause for pausing the critiques. During a recent stop on his Stay Dangerous Tour, he offered a crowd in Sydney the following:

“I don’t wish jail on nobody, you know what I’m saying? That’s a f*cked up situation, that’s a f*cked up place. I don’t wish jail on nobody but f*ck 6ix9ine, n—a.”

Kanye West vs. His Own Legacy

this represents good and America becoming whole again. We will no longer outsource to other countries. We build factories here in America and create jobs. We will provide jobs for all who are free from prisons as we abolish the 13th amendment. Message sent with love pic.twitter.com/a15WqI8zgu

— ye (@kanyewest) September 30, 2018

If you told me the version of me that discovered The College Dropout between listens of Blink-182’s untitled album way back in 2004 that the same guy who ultimately inspired me to drop out of college twice would later be palling around with a delusional, reality TV, quasi-celebrity in the Oval Office, I probably wouldn’t have responded to you at all. But I definitely would have solemnly, quietly stewed about it, more in shock about this purported future Kanye than the idiot currently occupying the White House.

Yet the year West has had didn’t feel plausible, even considering everything that’s happened since he first visited Trump Tower in 2016. As for the actual art, West — for the first time in his career — failed to nail his usual zeitgeist wheelie pop with the solo album Ye. His contributions to the Kid Cudi collab Kids See Ghosts and Pusha T’s Daytona, however, showed that the artist buried deep beneath reckless MAGA co-signs and clout-chasing memes for meme’s sake was (seemingly, at least) still in the fight.

source https://uproxx.com/hiphop/2018-rap-beef-summary-drake-pusha-card-nicki-eminem-mgk-kanye/

#hiphop #hip hop legend #hip hop history #hip hop #music #trending #hip hop news #ballin #hip hop scen

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allenmendezsr · 4 years

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Do you really think these skinny actors who all of a sudden look like Greek Gods, or guys like me who make their living by being huge, don’t have a few tricks up their sleeve?…

If you think it’s some magical supplement, 8 hours in the gym (like I’ve heard some guys claim, which is BS), or the right “gear”, if you know what I mean

Think again

Listen: I know guys who do these insanity-bragging workouts and take stuff they give HORSES just to gain a few measly ounces of muscle

Most of them STILL fail to pack it on, because they haven’t got a clue how to REALLY train for maximum mass.

How to trick their bodies into what I call

hyper-recovery

Have a look at the guys I’ve shared this secret with, this represents just a handful of my so-called, “Guinea Lion Group”:

Can’t call them pigs because now they’re all freakin’ ripped!

Your recovery is rocketed through the roof

You spend HALF the time guys currently spend in the gym

MUCH MORE time resting and eating normal food

And you’ll STILL gain MORE muscle and absolutely shred your body fat

LET ME REPEAT…

I’m talking about several POUNDS of lean muscle every week.

And it all happens thanks to a style of training I’ll reveal today.

A protocol that’s a whopping FOUR MINUTES LONG.

One that stimulates the production of a highly unique super recovery muscle helper cell, called satellite cells.

This is just THE muscle-building info you didn’t know about until today.

Look, I know you’re curious, and I’ll explain all of this in a few minutes.

Because it will forever change the way you approach weight training, and even how you think about dieting… FOR GOOD!

I just have to WARN YOU about something, and you have to promise you’ll take this warning seriously before you continue reading!

This website is getting a lot of attention

A certain search engine is trying to get this information BANNED because I’m pissing off a lot of really HUGE supplement companies and magazines.

These guys have billions of dollars, plenty of cash to sue my ass, and there’s no way I’m going to be able to keep this website live much longer if this pressure continues

I’ll be forced to either take it down, or charge $97 a head to attend a “webinar” and read the same exact letter you are reading right now for free

So, you best be sure you do just that:

– Read this now, while it’s still on the Internet

– Listen, if you have been told there “is no secret” to building muscle, or that you can only build muscle “slowly”

– Or, worse than that, you can gain muscle, but you’ll pack on some fat while doing it

You’ve been LIED TO

…And today, I’ll prove it to you

Oh, I’ve seen it all

I’m a pro bodybuilder, so you can only imagine what I’ve seen guys do out of desperation and greed over precious muscle

I’ve seen guys train for 7 straight hours

I’ve seen dudes take outrageous amounts of illegal gear, enough to kill them if they keep it up

And I’ve seen thousands of guys like you:

Good guys who are just wanting to add 10, 20, maybe even 30 pounds of rock-hard muscle in just the right places

A bigger chest, better arms, cut abs, and delts that look so killer, it looks like you’d have to turn sideways to get through a door

And let’s be honest:

You want more attention? (hey, it’s normal)

Attention from women? (sure, it’s gonna happen)

Jealous friends in the gym? (bound to happen too)

And with that attention comes respect, confidence, and the POWER to really move through life like an Alpha animal

Taking charge, making it happen, and forging a life out of iron… one that YOU control, not that controls YOU!

However, here’s what I’ve NEVER SEEN:

In over 15 years of training, I’ve never seen anything come close to this almost ALIEN method of gaining muscle

You’ll end up the strongest guy in the gym, even though this isn’t about “lifting heavy”

You’ll end up totally lean with that beach-ready body you want because this method of training automatically burns body fat

More body fat than you can ever burn off by starving yourself

And, it’s FAST:

How fast? 200% faster than traditional weight training! We’re talking about you adding POUNDS of lean muscle every week. Not every month, every week

That’s 10 pounds in less than 5 weeks, 20 pounds in less than 10 weeks… As much muscle as you desire!

And here’s the really, REALLY incredible part:

Guess what’s feeding all that new muscle on your body?

Your unwanted, unwelcome, downright UGLY body fat

This one technique, revealed in detail within this free presentation, gives you more muscle mass faster, and it WORKS by using your own body fat for fuel…

That’s right: you get bigger and leaner at the SAME TIME!

And that’s what you really want

Getting LEANER as you get BIGGER makes everything look and feel HARDER

Just like these guys have done, and literally hundreds of other guys I shared this one stealth technique with over the past several months

And let me save you some time:

You’ll never hear about this in a magazine, because I’ve made 100% sure EVERYONE I shared it with kept their mouths shut about it

And, for good reason:

I wasn’t ready to tell the world about this muscle revolution until I had the science to back it up

You must be ready for a load of questions from strangers, like, “How big ARE your arms, man?” and, “I bet you can bench press a freakin’ HOUSE, right?”

And yeah, you’ll have so many guys asking you HOW you got the body you’re about to have, you can start charging hard cash to give them the answers, and they’ll pay you

Trust me, I know

Ready for the secret?

Pay attention, because this is the only place you’ll ever hear about it, and that’s because I’m the guy who invented it, and who put it to the test in university studies

It all starts HERE:

Each of these balloons represents one of your muscle cells.

Get these cells bigger, and YOU get bigger, and I bet you know that already

Now, here’s what you may have never heard before:

You build muscle WHILE RESTING, not while at the gym

Your mission in the gym is SO SIMPLE:

Stimulate your muscles into growth… Period! End of story.

Stimulate, then go home and eat, that’s what you do

You don’t just, “lift weights”

Come on man, you KNOW for a fact that isn’t working for you

It’s the way you lift during your last 4 minutes of an exercise that makes ALL the difference

These 4 minutes create 200% more muscle gains… FACT, not theory, and these 4 minutes are the difference between looking average

And looking awesome!

Want proof?

Click the image to see the science.

So, how does this weird 4-minute trick work?

First, it takes every cell in your muscle fibers. And, just like a balloon..

EXPANDS THEM.

Normal training tears down muscle fibers and forces your body to go into crisis mode, trying like hell to repair it before your next workout

However, you can expand a cell without experiencing this recovery crisis

In fact, that’s exactly what my patented, university-proven system is called:

Cell Expansion Protocol Training, or CEP Training for short

It’s unlike anything you’ve ever experienced, and it takes a whopping four minutes per exercise to automatically trigger the CEP Response

So, rather than ripping your fibers to shreds, you selectively stimulate

You use the 4-minute CEP Training Principle to force every cell in every muscle into hyper-recovery mode

Think about it:

Take a balloon…

If you were to train the old-fashioned way, this balloon would swell up temporarily.

That’s the pump we all love, right?

And as you know, that pump goes away

Now, imagine if your pump never went away?

What if you were given the key to “tricking” your muscles cells into expanding and expanding

And your cells recovered so quickly, it looks as if you have a CONSTANT PUMP?

How would that feel? Orgasmic, that’s how

I’m going to demonstrate on video CEP Training for Biceps today

So by the time this presentation ends, you’ll at least be able to get started using CEP with your biceps

So keep watching, unless you enjoy having skinny arms

Now, there’s a reason why this happens with CEP Training, and not with any other form of muscle-building training

And why it cuts everyone’s gym time nearly IN HALF at the same time

It goes back to what I mentioned to you before: Satellite cells

We’ve proven that stimulation of muscle tissue using CEP Training dramatically increases satellite cell production

Satellite cells are cells made by your body to help repair muscle damage

So, just think about it for a second:

If you stimulate your muscles using CEP, And CEP produces FAR MORE satellite cells than traditional training

That means you recover much faster

And faster recovery means faster muscle growth, because a muscle ONLY grows during recovery

Getting the really big picture now?

Less time in the gym

Plus 4 minutes of CEP Training at the end of a movement

And you get a load more of your body’s most powerful muscle-building recovery cells speeding to your aching body parts

Blasting your recovery through the roof

And expanding the size and volume of each muscle cell

Expanded Cells means MASS

As much as you want

10 pounds, 15 pounds, 25 pounds, hell, 100 pounds if you want

It’s all the same training, the only difference is the amount of food you eat

The BEST part of it all is that CEP Training creates the muscle you desire automatically

Your body is literally FORCED to expand its muscles cells in response to CEP Training

You give it no choice

And your body gets the fuel it needs to expand your cells from your stored body fat

Sure, if you eat 7 pizzas a day, it will use that for fuel

Yet, if you’re eating half-way normally, your body fat will be ROBBED to pay the energy price of all that satellite cell production and cell expansion

And that gives YOU the body you want

By now, you’re wanting to get started using CEP as soon as possible

And the question you have is HOW:

How do you get started? What do you do first?

Here’s your choice

You can keep reading, and you’ll see me demonstrate CEP Training for biceps

And then you can try to figure the rest out on your own

Good luck with that, because you’ll need it

CEP Training is extremely specific to each body part

What works for biceps definitely will NOT work for chest, for example

Hey, you can TRY

Or, you can man-up, admit that you want a Mr. Olympia-caliber bodybuilder to personally COACH YOU

Radically decreasing the time it will take for you to walk down the beach with a body other guys would kill for

Or hang by the pool in the skimpy bikini-clad hottie section and let the women fight over who got your attention first!

Or, just look the way you’ve always wanted to look when you go out on the town

Whatever you want, this is the fastest track to give it to you:

I call it The MI40 CEP Training Program.

The MI40 CEP Rapid Start Action Plan

This video is literally 5 minutes – it takes me only 5 MINUTES to get you started using CEP in your very first workout

So, if you’re like me and you’re in a hurry, this video alone is worth its weight in gold

And, if you’re like a lot of guys I coach, guys who want every little detail spelled out so they couldn’t mess it up if they tried

Then here’s what else I have for you today:

CEP Practical Application Guide

Not only will you want to KNOW the secrets, you’ll want to know HOW to apply them so you can start TRANSFORMING your body NOW! Not tomorrow, TODAY!

This guide will show you how to bring theory to the REAL WORLD in meathead English that even the most hardcore numbskull can understand and start getting their BEST RESULTS EVER.

This guide is gold

Nutrition Guide

Good results start with good nutrition… AMAZING results start with CEP-style Nutrition!

Ever wonder what’s best to eat and when? Ever confused after reading bullshit article after bullshit article? Do you ever think what really is the best approach to achieving your dream physique?

Solution… the MI40-X Nutrition Guide!

The cutting-edge principles laid out here will provide the building blocks for your INSANE transformation… a complicated topic with complicated tactics made STUPID SIMPLE…

This guide will be your go-to resource from here on out, something you can refer to again and again..

God results start with good nutrition… AMAZING results start with CEP-style Nutrition!

Supplement Guide

With a billion dollar industry breathing down your neck 24/7, it’s hard to separate fact from fiction… and with so many supplements out there, who’s got time to do the research?

Well, BPak’s got your back! 😉

This guide not only tells you THE best supplements, it tells you WHEN to take them in a WHOLE RANGE of different situations….

Not sleeping well? …I’ve got a protocol for that!

Feel like you want to be able to push harder in the gym? …covered!

On a budget? …I’ll lay out just the essentials so you can work with what you have!

I’ll even tell you where to buy all this stuff easily and quickly so you can get reputable products, PROVEN to work, to help you start GAINING muscle and DROPPING that ugly belly fat FAST!

FAQ Guide

All your questions answered… all the info you need so you can spend your time making progress, not online searching for clues!

I’ve taken the most common questions from those testing the program and broken them down in detail.. you’ll be quickly on the FAST-TRACK to a SHIRT-RIPPING chest and perfectly cut ABS!

A Guide you can quickly reference at any time, so you can spend more time DOING and less time sitting around trying to figure it out.

Workout Sheets

The most intelligent muscle-building workouts EVER designed, ready to print and take with you to the gym.

No matter your starting point, I’ve got a workout for you!

3 levels of workouts that will kick your butt… but leave you wanting more!

Think you’re advanced and can handle anything thrown your way? Well Mr. Awesome, give the Pro workouts a whirl and I GUARANTEE you’ll be coming back to me with your tail between your legs!

Don’t say I didn’t warn you!

These are THE workouts you NEED to surpass anything you’ve ever done in the gym, and cause GROWTH that transforms your body in 6 short weeks! Time to take things to the next level!

7 Day Primer Phase

To get the best out of MI40-X… form is key!

….this guide is a learning curve for many, but an ideal primer for ALL!

7 Day Detox Diet

A no-brainer as to what this is right?

…well, it’s better!

The Exercise Execution Guide

Every body part, every exercise, every freakin’ detail spelled out for you so there’s absolutely zero guesswork needed on your part.

You’ll always know EXACTLY what to do, and precisely how to do it.

The Execution Guide is your exercise bible for recreating your physique from head to toe using super-simple, common sense, no BS-style instruction that has only one goal in mind:

Your most muscular, ripped, and perfect body!

The CEP Training Blueprint

Inside, you’ll discover the methods of training you absolutely MUST AVOID if you want to actually LOOK like you lift.

Face it, most guys who train look like they play soccer or something…

You want to look like a dude with MUSCLE!

So, turn to page 6 as soon as you get the Blueprint in your hands to discover all the messed-up training methods that the magazines and idiot gym rats have tried to pass off as fact.

Trust me, I guarantee you are using some, if not ALL of these waste-of-time methods, and they do far worse than waste your time:

They are keeping you from the body you want!

They literally HALT muscle growth and PROMOTE more fat storage!

You’ll also discover the reason why I insist you enjoy your food…

Even as CEP Training is stripping all that unwanted fat off your body, you’ll be laughing in the faces of guys doing hours of cardio, HOPING they’ll see an ab one day, if they’re lucky!

With CEP, you don’t NEED CARDIO.

And you don’t need to overdo it on the diet…

Listen: I know you enjoy a few beers with your friends, and that you have better things to do than eat all damn day!

That’s why I made the CEP Training nutrition guidelines so dead simple.

Now, that’s not all you’ll be receiving today:

I also want you to have private access to my

MI40 CEP Training Video Library

I’ll be your personal trainer on every exercise, so you can be 100% confident you’re doing the CEP training to get all the benefits!

Yet, the Library offers you a lot more than that:

I break every CEP Training exercise down into 3 phases, just in case you’re just starting out, or you’re fairly experienced, or perhaps you’re a fitness pro… doesn’t matter:

Everyone, from newbie natural to pro athlete is covered in these 3 phases!

Plus, each video focuses on ONE body part, so you can pick and choose which body parts you most want to focus on.

Some guys want bigger arms right away, so you can start there…

Or maybe it’s your legs

Your chest

Your back

You font-18px text-bold opensans it, it’s covered in the CEP Training Video Library

Hey, I’m not finished yet! You’ll also receive your copy of

The MI40-Xtreme Total Training Videos.