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just-jordie-things · 6 months

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the subject of every photo - fushiguro megumi

word count: 5,555 (i'm so proud of that) warnings: swearin' summary: a photoshoot at the pumpkin patch isn't his ideal day, but at least megumi gets to spend time with you. and maybe he'll take a few pictures anyway. (a/n): really delayed pumpkin themed fic with the softest boy but i needed to write this ok a greater power called upon me to do it

___

“It’ll be fun!” Nobara had claimed, although her tone was more threatening than bubbly. “It’s just a little photoshoot at a pumpkin patch, why so gloomy about it?”

And it wasn’t that Megumi was gloomy about it, because he wasn’t. It would be immature to pout about a simple hangout among friends. The thing was… he just didn’t care for the whole pumpkin patch thing that really seemed to take off on instagram and tiktok these last few years.

He hadn’t carved a pumpkin since he was just a tot, and even then he’d only done it to satisfy Gojo’s bonkers need to participate in every holiday tradition. He never particularly liked scooping the guts and seeds out, and as a kid wasn’t decent enough with a blade to carve a face that actually looked interesting. Not to mention, it was always chilly in late October, making it insufferable to wander around outside solely to pick out a big orange vegetable.

Really, if he wanted a pumpkin that bad, he would’ve picked out a discount one from the grocery store. But really, he didn’t want a pumpkin.

Nonetheless, Nobara had bought four disposable cameras— which he didn’t know were even still a thing— told everyone to wear their cutest, coziest outfit, and pretty much demanded they all go spend the afternoon at one of the more popular farms in town. As with most plans, Megumi begrudgingly agreed.

Even under three layers— his coat, his sweater, and the long sleeved tee he wore underneath them both— the crisp air still pricked at his skin and left goosebumps in it’s wake. It was hard to enjoy being out here when he was fighting the urge to shiver.

“It’s pretty cold for this, huh?”

Megumi wipes away the resting bitch face he’d been making, opting instead for as much neutrality as he could muster. He turns to (y/n), only to find her peering up at him from behind her little plastic camera. His brows wrinkle.

“Don’t take a picture of me at that angle”

He puts his hand over the lens and pushes it away before she could even think about snapping the photo, and she chuckles a bit at his boyish antics. He almost cracks a smile when she’s peeking up at him with her cheeks tinged pink from the cold. He squashes it before his lip could curl too far.

“Well what side do you prefer then?” She teases, shifting around to stand before him and raising her shitty little camera again. “Full portrait? Or perhaps a side profile?”

Megumi rolls his eyes, but when he starts to walk away, she’s quick to follow. He doesn’t dislike her company.

Nobara is off farther in the field, ordering Yuuji to pick up as many pumpkins as he can for the perfect picture. It was only a matter of time before she came over and started barking at the two of them to make the perfect poses as well.

“So why do you hate pumpkin patches?” (y/n) breaks their silence, but when he turns to her again, she’s fixing her camera on a sparrow pecking away at a less than ripe pumpkin.

“I don’t hate pumpkin patches,” He replies, but even he has to admit the dryness in his voice makes it seem a bit unbelievable. “It’s just…” He glances at her out of the corner of his eye, but he’s quick to straighten his gaze when he finds her full attention on him now. “Cold” He finishes, lamely, but it’s not untrue.

He fiddles with the plastic camera in his hands.

“Yeah,” (y/n) agrees from beside him. “Would’ve been nice to do this a few weeks ago, when it was still sunny”

Megumi nods back at her, unsure of what else to say.

He hoped that they weren’t doomed to only speak about the weather today. However that meant he’d probably have to put the effort in to change the subject. His palms began to sweat.

It was their day off, so he didn’t want to strike up a conversation about work, and preferably he’d like to avoid the subject of sorcery altogether. So that narrowed down the options by a lot.

He knew that like him, she liked to read. But she was more into the fantasy stuff, and the only book off the top of his head he could make conversation about was The Lion The Witch and The Wardrobe and he was fairly certain that wasn’t currently on her shelf.

Was it always this hard or was he just overthinking it?

“Wait, stay right there!”

Before he can suck it up and ask how her most recent assignment went, (y/n’s) throwing her arms up at him to make him freeze in place. Megumi startles at the sudden movement and holler, but he listens and stays put while she backs up a few steps.

“The sun is peeking out,” She explains, before steadying her camera in front of her face. “The lighting is great” She says with a grin, and then without warning, she snaps the photo.

Megumi wants to complain, he didn’t even have time to smile or pose or anything. When that picture got printed, he’d just be a guy standing there, probably with a resting bitch face. Nobara wouldn’t be happy.

But (y/n’s) still grinning as she lowers the camera.

“Too bad we gotta wait so long to see ‘em,” She says as she heads back towards him. “It’d be nice to—”

“Stop moving”

He’s more blunt than she is, already lifting his camera and peeking through the small lens. (y/n) gets the hint and retraces her steps to fit properly in the frame.

“Better?” She asks, tossing her hair over her shoulder dramatically before posing with a bright smile.

Megumi snaps the photo without warning, although he’s sure that this one will turn out much better than the one she’d taken of him. For one, she’s smiling, but he’s also certain that she’s much more photogenic than he is.

She’s at his side again as they wander around the patch, fiddling to fit the camera into the pocket of her coat. It takes him a few minutes to find his courage again, but eventually Megumi clears his throat and tries to spark conversation.

“Gojo used to take a million pictures of me and Tsumiki”

That seems to be exactly the right thing to say, because (y/n’s) entire demeanor lights up as she looks up at him with wide eyes.

“Really?” She laughs softly at the mental picture. “Did he keep, like, photo albums and stuff?”

“Oh yeah,” Megumi snorted, recalling the rows of photo books on the living room bookshelf when he was young. “Dozens, at least. It was like he couldn’t commit a thing to memory, always had to document everything”

When he was young, it was obnoxious to always have a camera shoved in his face. Now though, he wonders if the crazy bastard still had those albums.

“That’s sweet,” (y/n) muses, wandering off a bit to check out a display of gourds, all varying in shapes and colors. “I bet there’s tons of embarrassing ones of you, too” She teases.

Megumi doesn’t give her an answer, instead silently watching as she picks up a large green vegetable with a curly top. She holds the long end in her hand, before turning to face Megumi with the plump end out, holding it like it was a very deformed gun.

He rolls his eyes at the joke, but just as she looks away, he snaps a photo.

(y/n) seems to not even notice, setting the gourd back on the display and turning back to Megumi to continue their conversation.

“Was he a scrapbook mom?”

He chuckles, and he wants to deny it, but he can’t. Even if he tried he thinks she’d see through it with how he smiles with all of his teeth. She’s laughing before he even explains.

“He made one scrapbook, ever,” He tells her. “And you have to swear to never tell them this,” He adds quickly. (y/n) doesn’t have to ask to know who he means, and she simply drags her thumb and forefinger over her lips as if to zip them up. “It took him weeks. I think the kitchen table was covered in all of his crafts for a solid month”

“You’re kidding!” She laughs louder, loving the image of her mentor hunched over a table while he glued down photos and ribbon to pretty sheets of paper.

“I wish I was. I think it’s why he only ever made one,” Megumi shrugged. “But it’s… a lot. Every sheet was three dimensional. The spine of the scrapbook was stretched so wide the thing couldn’t even sit flat”

He knows that all of the pictures in that book would be embarrassing now. Gojo liked to document every first— first day of school, first science project, first A+, along with more ridiculous milestones, like when Megumi chopped all of his hair off in the fifth grade and looked ridiculous. If he remembered correctly, Gojo glued that hair in the book too, as if it were his baby hairs. That scrapbook really should be burned, but a part of him wishes he could show her now, just to prove how messy it really is.

“I’d do anything to get my hands on it,” (y/n) sighed, almost as if she could read his mind. “My parents did some stuff like that, but they certainly weren’t obsessive”

“Obsession is all he knows” Megumi mumbles, and he doesn’t mean to be funny, but she laughs, and it makes his chest feel warm.

“I still think it’s sweet,” She assures him, and then she stops in their slow and aimless walk, kneeling down to tie the shoelaces on her boot. Megumi waits beside her. He cared much more for her company than he did seeing the pumpkin patch. “He probably just wanted to save lots of memories of you guys when you were little. All parents say it goes by fast”

She goes to tie the other boot, and Megumi can only stand there in soft surprise. Sure, deep down he always considered Gojo his parent, because he simply just was. But no one else referred to their relationship that way, the others always called him teacher or mentor. But (y/n) must’ve understood that it was more than that.

He’s pulling his camera out again and stealing another quick picture while she was still focused on her shoes.

When she stands, he’s got the camera tucked back into his pocket and an innocent look on his face.

“Want to take a picture over there?” She asks, pointing to the tower of hay bales set up mostly for photos. Originally it was for children to climb and play on, but it’s purpose was far more often served as a posing station.

Megumi simply nods, and follows her as she races over the tower. It shouldn’t have surprised him when she started climbing the thing right away. Surely Nobara had been over here earlier, striking a pose with one hand on her hip and the other on the stack of hay, but not (y/n), who was almost to the top.

“You’re not gonna fall, right?” Megumi asks unsurely as she’s grabbing at the highest bale.

“I’m a trained athlete!” She shrieks back, clearly offended.

“I’m more worried about you destroying the play area” Megumi retorted, his lip curling upwards against his will. He can’t help but take a picture before she’s settled. Her hair’s a mess and her limbs are everywhere as she tries to steady herself on the wobbling tower, but it’s a perfect picture nonetheless.

“This is great!” She shouts back at him, before stretching her hands above her head. “Take my photo like this!”

It’s silly, it’s childish, but Megumi’s laughing to himself as he snaps a couple.

Somehow she manages to climb down without toppling the entire thing, and they quickly make their way across the pumpkin patch before an employee could scold them for being grown adults playing on the children’s setup.

Megumi finds it easier to talk with her the longer they walk around, aimlessly eyeing pumpkins without committing to picking any out, taking photos here and there, but mostly they just wander around and talk. Yuji and Nobara seem so wrapped up in the full on photoshoot they were having with each other that it could seem like they’d completely forgotten the other pair, but Megumi didn’t mind one bit.

Hang outs never turned out like this. Nobara tended to cling to (y/n) like a lifeline. She was always dragging her off to the next boutique on the strip or game in the arcade or exhibit at the museum— wherever they went, it seemed as soon as Megumi would get a minute of alone time with her, Nobara would steal her away. It was deflating, but he couldn’t be mad, they were best friends after all.

Today was like a gloomy day miracle. He almost felt spoiled having the last half hour with her all to himself. All of her laughter and smiles were only for him. It warmed up his chilled hands until soon, even the breeze wouldn’t make him shiver.

(y/n) didn’t appear to have the same effect, shaking like a leaf every time the wind picked up. She always shrank into the collar of her coat and shoved her hands into her pockets, and after a few times, Megumi couldn’t stand to see her freezing.

“Let’s go inside for a bit,” He nodded his head towards the small shop. (y/n) pouted back at him, before glancing around the pumpkin patch, clearly looking for their friends. “They won’t be upset that we went inside because we’re cold,” Megumi chuckles to himself, before gently pushing his hand against the small of her back so that he’d follow her. “I’ll text Itadori” He adds for good measure.

After a moment of hesitation she agreed and walked along with him, but just slow enough that he left his hand on her lower back. Just because it was nice to be so close to him.

Stepping into the shop was an instant rush of fresh warm air, and she finally felt like she could stretch her fingers. There was a small bakery inside with only a couple of tables, but without anyone else inside it was perfectly quaint to warm up in.

“I’m going to order a hot chocolate, do you want anything?”

The offer was sweet, but she’s already making her way to the counter, set on a mission as soon as the alluring smell of apples and cinnamon wafted past her nose.

“I could go for a coffee” Megumi hummed as he followed.

He’s ordering for the both of them as soon as a clerk arrives behind the counter, two drinks along with the enormous bear claw in the glass case that (y/n) hadn’t torn her eyes away from since stepping up to the counter. She tries to fight him when he pulls out his wallet but he’s faster at tapping his card to the reader than she is at hitting him.

Even once they sit down with their drinks and the pastry that takes up most of the table space between them, she argues with him about the payment, and all he can do is shake his head— and maybe smile to himself just a little bit. After realizing arguing is futile, she decides that as long as he eats some of the bear claw, she can forgive him.

And they continue to chat, about dumb things, about nothing, about everything. Megumi learns all about the book series that she is reading, along with her plans for getting promoted faster, and that her dream pet is a sugar glider.

“That’s ridiculous,” He mumbles through a mouthful of almond paste and cinnamon. “When would you ever have the time to take care of something like that?”

“That’s why it’s a dream pet, dummy,” (y/n) rolls her eyes at him. “Doesn’t have to be realistic. Don’t you have a dream pet?”

“I kinda already have a lot of pets”

“Oh, right,” She laughs to herself, and he thinks he can see a hint of a blush dusting over her cheeks. Was she embarrassed? He wasn’t sure exactly. But it was really cute. “Well if there’s ever a sugar glider shikigami, please summon it for me” She tells him in all seriousness, and Megumi bites his tongue as he agrees to the condition immediately.

He pulls out his camera for the tenth time that day and rests his elbows on the table as he brings it to his face. (y/n’s) eyes widen before she’s covering half her face with one hand.

“Are you taking a picture of me right now?” She hisses anxiously, before shaking her head at him.

“Duh” He mutters out as he tilts forward and back, trying to find just the right angle of lighting.

“I’m eating—”

“So? Not like you have food on your face. Hush. Go back to eating or something”

“I am not letting you take a picture of me while I eat”

“Alright then just sit there then”

She’s grabbing her paper cup of hot cocoa to use as a shield, but it’s too late. Megumi clicks the button and she can hear the soft whirring coming from inside the camera.

The lens cuts to black and Megumi pulls the camera away, eyeing the little roll of numbers next to the lens.

“I’m out already,” He says, tossing it onto the table. “Guess I win”

(y/n) laughs to herself.

“I didn’t know this was a competition,” She takes a sip of her warm beverage before setting it back down. “But I can’t believe you finished before me”

“How many do you have left?”

Curiously, (y/n) pulls the camera out of her pocket and eyes the tape with the amount of film left. She frowns as she looks back up at him.

“Just one,” She answers, and her frown tilts into a small, soft smile before she asks, “Do you want to take one together?”

___

Greedily, Nobara snatches the stack of freshly printed photos out of Megumi’s hands. (y/n) and Yuji are too busy sharing theirs with each other, and Nobara had been dying to know what photos Megumi and (y/n) had taken on their last outing. By the time the group had met up and gone home, their cameras were already full, and she knew she hadn’t been the subject of a single one of them.

“I swear Fushiguro if these are all dumb pictures of pumpkins, I’ll—”

But her threat falls short after sliding through the first three pictures.

The first was (y/n) on the path, just standing and smiling. It wasn’t special, there wasn’t even a pumpkin in the background, but it was cute.

The second was a picture of her crouched down and tying her shoe. Her face wasn’t even in the picture, her hair was hanging in front of it, but if you squinted you could barely make out the tip of her nose.

Then the third was another candid, where she was pretending to hold a gourd like a gun.

“What the—?”

Nobara flips through to the next one in the stack, and yet again there’s a candid of her climbing up the side of a hay bale tower. At least that one captured her smile. She shouldn’t have been surprised to see the fifth one in the stack was also of (y/n), this time sitting on top of the haystack victoriously

“You’ve got to be kidding me, dude”

“Okay give them back—!” Megumi tries to grab the stack of pictures from Nobara before she could keep being nosey, but she deflects fast, swiveling to turn away from him and keep skipping through the photos.

He shouldn’t have let her get her hands on them to begin with, but it was too late now. If he caused too big of a scene, Yuji and (y/n) would notice. He didn’t exactly want all of his pictures on display.

So Nobara kept flipping.

One was of her lifting up the tiniest of pumpkins— definitely the runt of the whole patch. It fit in the palm of her hand but she seemed delighted by it.

The next few were just of her walking around, nothing too exciting in the frame. Just the occasional pumpkin in the background.

There was a decent one taken from inside the shop. (y/n) was still in the frame but her back was turned as she eyed the glass case of sweets. Nobara could almost let Megumi off the hook for that one. Almost.

And then the last photo was of her laughing, the blurry image of a paper cup waving in the space beside her face. Her eyes are on the camera, so she must’ve known he was taking that picture, but judging by the surprise in her expression, it was easy to conclude she was trying to hide behind that cup.

Once she’d ogled every picture, Nobara finally turned back to Megumi. Her brows twitched and furrowed, lips parted in shock, not a single word spoken as she handed the stack back to him. It’s practically shoved towards him, but he doesn’t complain, just snatches them back as fast as he can.

He wants to find a way to quickly and discreetly ask her to keep this to herself, but before he can find the words, she’s gawking at him again.

“Every single one?” Nobara asks in a mutter.

“We hung out the whole time, okay? It's not like—” Megumi tries to defend himself, but it’s no use. Nobara’s already speaking over him again.

“It’s almost pathetic, dude. Just ask her out like a normal person”

His brows almost raise to his hairline in shock. Here he thought she was about to call him out for being a creep or something. But no, her disgust only lied in his pathetic pining and lack of action. Maybe he should have assumed that already.

He doesn’t get the chance to say anything before Nobara’s marching over to Yuji and demanding to see his photos as well. Megumi’s left reeling from the whole interaction, the humiliation still lingering in his gut.

The feeling remains as (y/n) makes her way to him, her own fresh stack of photos in her hands. There’s a nervous sort of smile on her face as she glances back at Yuji and Nobara, double checking that they were out of earshot.

“They took that pretty seriously, huh?” Her voice was still low, careful not to draw the attention of their rambunctious friends. “Yuji takes great photos, don’t get me wrong. But I think she should pay him for his time”

There’s some relief in his chest when he cracks a smile, a small laugh coming out. He could only imagine the quality of Nobara and Yuji’s photos, certainly prepped for instagram.

“I bet she still puts filters over all of them” He mutters back, and (y/n) stifles a giggle behind her hand, but nods her head in agreement.

“Can we leave now or what?” Nobara calls out, already dragging Yuji by the arm to leave the store. “I want to get boba before home”

“Boba sounds good,” (y/n) agrees softly. “Let’s go”

As the red head continued to drag her friend despite him arguing that he was an adult who could walk by himself, she turned and aggressively whispered something to him. After her obvious threatening, she glances back at (y/n) and Megumi, which Yuji promptly follows her pointed glance. Suddenly after that he was upright and speed walking along with her.

(y/n) and Megumi share a baffled look as their friends so blatantly ditch them, but they don’t exactly pick up the pace to follow.

“So, did you get good photos?” Megumi asks, tucking his own away in his pocket. Foolishly, he hoped if they were out of sight she wouldn’t ask him about them.

“Oh,” (y/n) chuckles nervously, holding her stack of pictures in both hands. She tilts them towards herself so he can’t see, and Megumi raises a brow at the secrecy. “It’s kind of embarrassing, actually” She says sheepishly.

Her cheeks flood with color, and Megumi can’t help the curious grin that begins to stretch across his face.

“Embarrassing?” He repeats, sounding horrifically hopeful. (y/n) sighs, and sticks her arm out, handing him the stack. He’s quick to take them and start flipping through, eyeing her anxious demeanor in his peripheral vision.

“Yuji’s probably going to tell you anyway. But… they’re sort of all..”

His steps slow further after quickly sliding through the bunch of pictures.

The first was at the entrance of the pumpkin patch, with the cute sign with the family name painted on it, and just under it was him. He wasn’t paying attention, and quite frankly he looked rather bored standing there. She must’ve taken it while he was still pouting about having to go.

The next photo was of the sparrow poking at the rotted pumpkin, and he had to admit the way she captured it actually was sort of cute.

The third was the photo Megumi dreaded seeing. He recognized it as soon as he saw himself standing on the thin path of dirt. He grimaced as he looked closer to see just how bad it was. But to his surprise, he wasn’t scowling like he thought he’d been. He was actually smiling.

Which was odd… he certainly didn’t remember smiling for that picture. He clearly remembered being upset because he hadn’t tried to look nice for her picture at all.

He glances at (y/n) to gauge her reaction so far, but she was holding her expression at a neutral state, waiting for him to react first.

So Megumi goes back to the photos, and flips to the next one. Which was… also him. It wasn’t anything special, just him standing there, but he was smiling a little bit in that one, too.

When the following is also a candid of him with that dumb little smile, he glances over at (y/n) again, raising a brow at her in silent question.

She’s a tough one to crack, but the corner of her lips gives her away as she tries to bite back a smile. His own smile is unable to be hidden as he flips through a few more photos.

And to his shock and delight, they’re all him. Him while he was picking up that big pumpkin she dared him to, him while he was drinking his coffee and not paying attention, him just standing and doing nothing in particular, but for whatever reason, she’d used up all her film on capturing it.

His favorite is the one of the both of them. She’d given him the camera so he could stretch his arm out and snap the photo selfie style. They’re sitting at the small table, two paper cups and the enormous bear claw between them, but pushed aside as (y/n) leans across the tabletop in order to better center herself. She’s grinning from ear to ear, her chin set in one hand while the other holds up a peace sign. Megumi’s smile isn’t as wide but nevertheless it’s genuine, and anyone looking at the picture would know. It’s a great picture of the two of them, and he thinks it’s probably the first, too.

Megumi hadn’t realized he’d gone through the whole stack till he flips to the next one and is met with the first photo, but once he does, (y/n’s) quick to reach out and take them back. She doesn’t snatch them as aggressively as Nobara had, she handles them gently, careful not to leave an ugly smudge or crease.

Megumi watches with eager intrigue as she tucks the edges together neatly, making the stack smooth in her hands.

“Sorry if that’s creepy— is that creepy?” She turns to him suddenly, full of worry that she’d crossed a line, but Megumi just chuckles, and shakes his head at her.

“Not creepy” He muses, his soft smile remaining as he dips his hand into his pocket, retrieving his own small collection of photos.

He stares at them for an indecisive minute, clenching and unclenching his jaw, working up the courage to make the smallest of gestures. When he does hold them out to her, he still doesn’t say a thing. His throat is too dry and hot to even try. He thinks it would be worse if his voice cracked right now.

(y/n) smiles as she tucks her pictures away in her purse with great care so that she could better look through the pictures he’d taken. His face flushes with color when she finally takes them from him. Even the small brush of the tips of her fingers against his has Megumi’s breath catching in his throat.

And he holds his breath as she eagerly slides through the stack of photos. His throat is far too constricted now to show any sign of life. He very well could pass out at any moment. He just hopes she’d leave him there in a heap on the ground.

The relief of the exhale doesn’t come until she begins to giggle. It’s soft at first, almost under her breath as she continues admiring his photos, but then it erupts into something brilliant and bubbly, as if it was coming out of her uncontrollably. As lovely as the reaction was, it didn’t do much to ease Megumi’s nerves. They began to sink their teeth into his heart and gut, and he knew that any minute now, his knees would give out.

When her laughter calms down and she finally looks up at him, the surprise is evident on his features when he sees her colored cheeks and nervous smile. She hands the stack back to him, and Megumi’s quick to tuck them into his pocket, where maybe he they’d disappear forever, or at least just from the front of their minds.

“That’s pretty cute, huh?” She asks, an aftershock of quiet laughter shaking her shoulders and crinkling the corners of her eyes. This time, Megumi can’t help the way he laughs with her, but he does duck his head bashfully.

(y/n) thinks it’s all the more cuter, how he resorts to his nervous habit of rubbing the back of his neck and looking anywhere but directly at her. She wonders if he even knows he’s doing it. With a surge of confidence, she rocks on her feet.

“Wanna ditch our friends and get lunch or something?”

He shrugs and nods, thinking anything would be better sustenance than the too-sugary drinks that Nobara had an addiction to. But the implication of the question dawns on him too late, and suddenly his eyes are widening as he realizes what she really meant.

“You mean— like, a date?”

It’s so damn cute the way his brows furrow and then raise ever so slightly, waiting without a single ounce of patience for her clarification. (y/n’s) giggling again as she nods her head, putting him out of his misery.

“Yeah, like a date,” She repeats teasingly.

Megumi nods his head again, this time faster, as if there was a time limit to her offer and he was worried he’d already wasted too much of it. Her smile brightens and there’s a small but noticeable skip in her step as they head off in a new direction together.

“Now maybe it won’t be so creepy when our friends see those pictures” She says, and Megumi can’t decipher if she’s messing with him or not. The look he gives her barely hides his panic.

“They’re gonna see them?”

“What do you think they’re talking about right now?” (y/n) retorts, knowing for a fact that Yuji and Nobara were gossiping away about the pair’s photos that consisted only of each other.

The thought makes Megumi’s face feel hot, and there’s no discretion in the way he tugs at his collar. The idea makes him nervous, his stomach flipping excessively. That said, he knew with the amount of gossip those two chatterboxes would generate, there was plenty of time to add a date to today’s agenda.

“They probably won’t even notice we’re gone”

(y/n) nods in agreement.

“They’ll be grateful to have the time for girl talk,” She teases.

With purpose, she steps closer to him so she could link her arm around his, tucking her hand into the crook of his elbow and shyly smiling up at him. Megumi returns the smile, his arm hooking a little further to keep her tucked next to him as close as he wanted. It was another chilly day outside, but he could almost forget about it with the way her closeness sparked warmth in his chest that flooded throughout his whole body. He hoped he’d get to do this for the rest of their day—

“So… where do we want to go?”

—and more days to come. ___

xoxo ~ jordie

#fushiguro megumi #fushiguro megumi x reader #megumi x reader #megumi fushiguro x reader #fushiguro megumi imagine #fushiguro megumi x reader fluff #jjk x reader #jujutsu kaisen x reader #jjk x reader fluff #jjk imagine #jujutsu kaisen imagine #megumi brainrot

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trashpandacraft · 10 months

Text

hi! ok so i'm going to talk about one of my top-five favourite things, which is: dyeing stuff! this is going to be specifically about dyeing protein fibres (animal fibres—wool, alpaca, silk, etc) in a pretty low-key way in your kitchen.

to be clear up front: this is not the most scientific, most perfectly reproducible, or most Objectively Correct way to dye things. i get a lot of fibre that i like this way, though, and i think that other people can, too.

fibre i've dyed that i think is neat:

you can also dye yarn like this:

yes, i like blue a lot. i also really like variegation and heathering, which is why most of the fibre here has patches of white—it's an intentional choice that i've made. you can make different choices.

here is what you need to dye things:

fibre, vinegar, dye, a pot, heat, and some water.

that was so you don't get overwhelmed by the impending wall of text. here is what you need to dye things (it's the same stuff!), but with way more detail:

fibre or yarn. this is the big one, obviously. i tend to dye in 100-200 gram batches, because that's approximately what fits on my stovetop easily. if you're very nervous about felting or harming your fibre, you can use stuff that's been treated to be superwash, start with yarn (which is harder to felt than fibre is), or use a felt-resistant breed like dorset or suffolk. honestly, though, i learned with merino because that's what i had, and it was fine. again, though, this guide is only for protein fibres. it will not work for things like cotton. the only exception to this is nylon, which will take on some colour, but less than a protein fibre will.

a mordant. this is a fancy way of saying a thing that makes dye stick, and for what we're doing here, it's citric acid or vinegar. your grocery store definitely has at least one of them, though if you can choose, i prefer citric acid, because i love wet wool smell but i do not always love wet wool vinegar smell.

dye. i use acid dyes, and am personally deeply loyal to dharma acid dyes, but ashford and jacquard acid dyes work the same way. if you don't want to buy dye or don't have access to it, food colouring will often work, as well, though i haven't tried this with natural food colourings and have no idea how well they'll work.

a dedicated dye pot. ok, if you're doing food dyes, you don't need this. if you're not, it's definitely best practice, though i don't know how dangerous it is not to. any large metal pot will do, but my favourite option is hotel pans, which are those huge metal pan/tray things that hold food at buffets and the like. i have a full-size one that's 15cm deep, and a half-size one that's 4cm deep. they're great because they let you lay out the fibre you're working with so you can see most of it in a single layer.

dedicated dye utensils. as before, i don't know how much of a huge deal this is. i'll be honest and admit that for several years i had a single pair of tongs that got used for all tong-requiring events, including dyeing, and i'm still alive. i suggest that you have at least a big spoon, and a big spoon and tongs are even better.

something to mix the dye in. yeah, i use empty plastic sports drink or soda bottles for this. you can be fancy and get mason jars or little squirt bottles or whatever, and if you get super into dyeing you'll want to mix up dye stocks, but that's way outside the scope of what we're doing here. i like the powerade bottles that have a little squirty mouthpiece, because it's fun to squirt dye onto things.

personal protective equipment. i think this is the part of things that freaks people out. ideally, you wear plastic gloves and a mask (yeah, like your covid masks) when you're working with dye. realistically, i almost never remember to put on gloves and just accept that my hands are going to be blue sometimes. you should wear a mask, because dye is an irritant, but the world is an imperfect place and i have wicked bad adhd and sometimes i forget. this isn't advice. i'm just being honest. you should use some kind of safety stuff. you probably won't die if you don't.

you might also want some little random bits: an old toothbrush or paintbrush, a pipe cleaner, some toothpicks, etc. this is mostly if you like speckles, or if you want very small patches of colour.

so first: there are a million ways to dye things, and i'm not convinced that any of them are objectively correct. i do what i do and it works for me. some of the things i do are the opposite of what most guides suggest, but i do them because i like the effects they create.

ok, that's all the background stuff you need. let's dye some stuff!

the number one most important thing to remember when you're dyeing is this:

you can always add more colour. you cannot take it away.

that's in fancy writing and bold because every once in a while i forget this, and every single time i end up regretting it.

here is how to dye things:

put water, citric acid (or vinegar), and fibre into a pot. add dye and heat. let cool completely. rinse the fibre in cool water, then hang to dry.

like, sure, we're going to go into way more detail, but push come to shove, if you do that, you're going to end up with dyed fibre. there are a lot of tutorials telling you that you must soak your fibre first, or you must add your citric acid this way, or hold the water at exactly this temperature, and i'm here to tell you that while any of these things can give you different results, those results aren't necessarily better.

the only way that you can totally screw this up is by accidentally felting your fibre, so before i get into the way more detail part of things, i'm going to talk about that.

how not to felt your fibre

i feel like if you've read this far, you know how things felt: wool, heat, and agitation. you may also notice that at least two of these things are required for dyeing. this can be stressful! but you don't have to be afraid of it. there's only been one time that i felted something to the point that it was unusable, and that happened because i literally fell asleep for several hours while the pot was on the stove. you can avoid doing this by simply setting an alarm—this is a good idea anyhow, because you'll want to check on your dye pot!

when you're dyeing, use the lowest heat that you can while still keeping the water at a simmer. if your stove, like mine, has one burner that's wildly unpredictable and sort of out of control, you may want to look for some sort of flame diffuser, also called a flame tamer or a simmer ring. i bought one on amazon for about fourteen dollars, and it's literally just a thick metal circle. it works fine.

you can also keep the heat low by using a pot with a thick bottom, though in my experience those are expensive, and if i had one i would be using it for soup, not wool.

avoid shocking your wool—never put room temperature wool into hot water, and never put hot wool into cold water. leave your wool in the dye bath until it's cooled completely, which for me usually means overnight.

finally, obviously you have to move the fibre around some. you'll need to peek under it in the pan, and when you're done, you have to rinse it and squish out the water. try to minimise handling, though. don't run water directly onto the fibre, don't get a wooden spoon and stir your dye pot around, don't wring the fibre dry when it's done.

you're probably never going to be perfect. i often find that i lose a gram or two of wool where fibres have grabbed onto each other, or where parts of the ends clumped up. it's not really felted, just sort of compacted, but it's not great to work with, and i'd rather lose a gram of fibre than fuss with the clumpy bits.

back to how to dye things

let's take it step by step, assuming a hundred grams of fibre.

put your pan on the stove and fill it halfway with water. add either a teaspoon of citric acid or a tablespoon of vinegar. this is going to help the dye strike, or stick to the fibre. the teaspoon/tablespoon is a guideline, but one that it's fine to exceed. adding more will help the dye strike faster, which can be useful if you're trying to create blocks of colour on your fibre. i usually err on the side of a little more than the guidelines, and just eyeball this—if you feel like the dye isn't taking well, you can add more later.

add your fibre to the pan. this is the first place you have to think about what you want the finished fibre to look like! you can put it into the pan any way you want, but i suggest trying to keep it in a relatively even layer, regardless of what that layer looks like. here are some ways to get specific effects:

if you want a gradient from one end of the fibre to the other, use a rectangular pan and lay your fibre out so that the line of it is parallel to the short sides of the pan

if you want a short, repeating gradient, use a rectangular pan and lay your fibre out so that the line of it is parallel to the long sides of the pan

if you want something that starts with very close repeats that get further apart as you go down the fibre, make an approximate spiral

if you don't want A Pattern (i usually don't) just lay things out in a single layer, more or less

here comes the next exciting part! decide if you want to let your fibre soak or not. again, doing or not doing this gives you some different effects!

soaking your fibre will mean that dye takes more evenly. if you want consistent colours, you'll want to soak.

not soaking your fibre means that the dye takes less evenly. the fibre on top will have less acid available to it, spends less time in the dye bath, and also has to actually get wet before it will start to dye. i actually love doing this, and think it affords a lot of cool opportunities to play with and layer colours.

if you're soaking, leave the fibre there until it's submerged. if not, don't.

now you're going to add dye! decision time, again.

you can add dye when the water is cold, which will give you more even dye coverage, and in my experience gives the colours more time to mix together

you can add dye when when the water is hot, which will give you less even coverage, and tends to encourage the colours to stay more delineated

probably surprising no one, i tend to heat the water first unless i'm starting with a base colour or i'm doing a two-colour gradient.

time to mix up some dye

as i mentioned earlier, i'm assuming that you're using powered acid dyes for this. if you're not, this mixing up part is technically optional—but doing it gives you way more control about how and where you place your colours, so i'm going to assume that you'll do it.

i usually mix dye in some sort of empty drink bottle. regardless of what you're using, before you add dye to anything, put some water in the bottle, wipe off the lip, put the lid on tightly, and shake the bottle vigorously. if there is any leakage at all, do not use that bottle. find a better bottle. if your bottle cap doesn't seal well or if you have an empty condiment bottle that's just a little wonky or whatever, you will get dye all over the kitchen, and your landlord will be really really mad about it, and you will regret your life choices. (if you own your kitchen, you can do whatever you want, but this isn't about you and you know it.)

so you have a bottle that seals tightly! great job. dump out the water and carefully put some dye powder into the bottle. remember earlier how i said you should be wearing a mask? this is the part where you should be wearing a mask.

i know that people are reading this and going, ok, but how much dye do i put in?

my answer is put in the amount that feels right in your heart, and don't forget the number one rule of dyeing things, which is that you can always add more colour, but you cannot take it away.

this isn't a very scientific answer. most dyes have a guideline about how much to use, expressed as a percentage of the dry weight of the fibre, which is what you use to get the whole quantity of fibre dyed evenly. for dharma dyes, it's like 1.5-2%, i think ashford is 1%, and jacquard is more like 2-4%, depending on the colour.

here is the problems with doing that in your kitchen: first, using that much dye will get you an evenly dyed piece of fibre, which—for me, at least—is basically the opposite of what i want. second, and more importantly, unless you have one of those teeny tiny scales used by jewelers and drug dealers, your kitchen scale will not weigh out such tiny quantities with any accuracy. third, if you do it like this, you really have to plan what you're doing ahead of time, because there's a point after which no more dye will bind! the fibre will be like enough thank u that's it i'm good and that'll be it, so you lose some of your ability to decide that actually, you want more green.

you can probably guess, at this point, that i don't weigh the dye. once you've done a couple batches of fibre with a given brand of dye, you'll start to get the vibes for how much you should use. if you really want a guideline, for a hundred grams of fibre, start with a quarter teaspoon of a given colour. you can add more—either more of this colour or a different one—later, as desired.

put your dye in the empty bottle, and then fill the bottle partway with hot water. the amount of water doesn't really matter here, nor does the specific temperature of the water. i usually fill about 3/4 of the way, because that way there's plenty of room for this next step, which is: wipe the lip of the bottle, recap it tightly, and then shake it up real good. the dye powder is going to dissolve into the water, and you now have a bottle of dye!

if you're going for a gradient, you might want to mix up your second colour so you can add them at (basically) the same time for more even mixing. if you're not, or if you only have one mixing bottle, you can do them one at a time.

oh my god we're finally putting dye on the fibre

are you ready? it's time!!

you have basically infinite options for how to do this, and many of them will give you different effects. here are some ideas:

pour the dye all at one side of the pan. and if you don't add anything else, your fibre will fade from the colour of the dye to the natural colour of the fibre

pour two colours, one at either side of the pan. depending on how much dye you use (and remember, you can always add more), this will give you either chunks of colour surrounded by white, or a two-colour gradient

add all the dye to unheated water and mix it gently, then let the fibre soak for a few minutes longer before turning on the heat. this will give you a fairly even colour

pour randomly all over, and you'll either end up with a tonal yarn or a heathered one, depending on how much dye you're using

add the dye to the water under the dry fibre, which will sink in and take up more dye on the bottom of the fibre than the top

if your heat wasn't on before, it should be now, and you're going to let the dye hang out in the hot but not boiling water for a while. how long? well, one of the cool things about dyeing with these dyes is that they exhaust, which means that when the dye has been sucked up by the fibre, the surrounding water will be clear. how long this takes will depend on the specific dye, how much of it you used, how much mordant you used, etc. i try to check every fifteen minutes.

reminder: if you started with room temperature water, the dye's not going to start taking until the water heats up, so don't check it after fifteen minutes and freak out that nothing has happened. it is fully normal for it to take up to an hour for the dye to exhaust. don't turn up the temperature, just give it time.

yay it worked!

at this point, you have a pot of hot water with some beautifully coloured fibre in it! but maybe it's not beautiful enough. maybe you want...more colours.

that's cool as hell and you should go for it. we mentioned two-colour gradients up there, but what if you want something else?

the answer, probably obviously, is adding more dye.

first, a caveat: while you can successfully make multicoloured gradients like this, it's more difficult than you think, and if it gets messed up—all the colours bleed into each other, say—it turns into a muddy mess. my suggestion is to stick to two (or three at most!) colour gradients until you have a much better feel for what you're doing.

let's talk about ways you can add more colour. you have two options: big colour and little colour.

big colour is going to add a lot of colour—you're going to mix up the dye and pour it just like you did before, but paying more attention to places that don't have dye yet. sometimes it's the middle of a gradient, or the white splotches from random pouring, or the half of the fibre that wasn't submerged when you started. or maybe you dyed the whole thing yellow, and now you want to add a blue gradient over top. whatever!

if you don't want to freehand pour, consider buying a couple large syringes, or a bottle with a squeezy top. these are also fun because you can easily get more colour between the laid-out fibre, or even under it.

in the pictures at the start of this post, the red-and-gold top and both yarns were dyed by adding big colour.

little colour isn't going to add big patches, but is going to add speckling, tonal depth, or smaller patches of colour. all of the blue-base fibres and the yellow-and-blue yarn were dyed like this.

if you're still reading this closely, you might have caught that i just said both yarns were dyed with big colour, and that the yellow-and-blue yarn was also dyed with little colour. these are both true! the base colours of the yarn were done to make big colour, but if you look at the full-size image, there are also a bunch of speckles. you can do whatever you want! no one can stop you!

here are some ways to add little colour:

mix up some dye, but use less water. add drops of the dye, either directly onto the fibre (more dramatic!) or in the water (tonal!)

use a toothpick to grab a little bit of dye powder and drop it into the dye bath (similar to the previous one, but a little less predictable)

put on a damn facemask. take a clean toothbrush, paintbrush, or pipecleaner, and just barely touch it to the dye powder. gently flick or tap the brush to add speckles of that colour

find a salt shaker that you're never going to use for anything but this. put citric acid, salt (to make it distribute better), and dye powder into it, and shake it up (with the holes covered, please cover the holes) to make sure they're evenly distributed. gently shake this over the fibre to add speckles, but more of them, and clustered together

put a little dye in a spray bottle and gently mist the exposed fibre, kinda glazing it with colour

another thing is that if you like a natural coloured yarn with dyed speckles, you can do any of these techniques without doing big colour first. the only thing to note when doing this is that you'll want to be very sure to spread out the fibre well, and maybe to consider dyeing one side, then very very carefully flipping it over and getting the other side.

ok, now what?

let's say that you've added all the colours that you want, and you've let your bath simmer long enough that the water is clear, or nearly clear. (if it's not, check troubleshooting, below.)

put the lid on your pan and walk away. if you don't have a lid, just walk away, but it's less dramatic.

the super frustrating part here is that the safest thing to do is wait until the water and fibre is fully cooled before you do anything else.

have i ignored this? yes

has it ever gone horribly wrong? not horribly wrong, but it's definitely caused me to lose an inch or two of roving on occasion

is it way more stressful if you don't wait? absolutely yes

honestly maybe just go to bed and deal with your fibre in the morning

so now let's say that it's morning and you slept long enough that your water and fibre are both room temperature, which often actually feels quite cool on your hands.

you have to drain your fibre. there are two ways to do this:

lift the fibre out of the water. this has the upside of not risking dumping your beautiful fibre into your sink, and not needing to maneuver a full pot of water, both of which are admirable. the downside is that wet fibre is fragile, and you'll want to be careful to support it.

dump the water out of the pan. this has the upside of minimising how much handling you're doing of the fibre, as well as (in my opinion) making rinsing easier. the downside is attempting to keep the fibre into the pot while you dump the water into the sink, and also needing to carry around a full pot of water.

secret third option: dump the fibre (and the water) into a strainer. upside: very easy, and you can keep the fibre in the strainer while you rinse, minimising both how much it needs to be handled and the weight on the fibre. downside: i never remember that this is an option until i'm already elbows-deep in acidulated water, discovering every tiny cuticle tear.

you're going to fill your dyepot with water again so that you can rinse the fibre. you want to minimise thermal shock, so keep the water temperature as close to the temperature of the fibre as you can, and don't run the water directly onto the fibre. i like to pull all the fibre to one side of the pan, and fill the pan on the other side.

side note: if you, smart person, remembered that you can use a colander, simply fill a pot with water, put the colander in the pot, and gently agitate the colander.

if you, person who is deeply relatable, did not remember you can use a colander and now have a pot with clean water and fibre, gently move your fibre in the water to encourage any excess dye and also citric acid to get out of there.

drain your fibre again, and this time, you're going to squeeze it dry. you're still trying to minimise agitation, so this isn't a 'wring it out' situation, it's a 'gently squish it between your hands and/or a hand and the side of the pot' situation.

hang your fibre to dry. remember what i was saying earlier about it being fragile? let me suggest, here, that you do not simply drape the entire length over a single hanger or something and hope for the best. if you literally have a single hanger, at least drape it back and forth a bit, but better if you can use more than one hanger, or a clothes drying rack, or that weird metal wine rack thing that came with your fridge that you've never used, or whatever.

important reminder: drip-drying things will make your floor wet! if you live somewhere very clear with no major roads or pollen nearby, you can probably dry things outside, but if you don't, you'll probably want to position the drying rack in a bath, shower, laundry area, or otherwise over something that will catch and/or absorb the water.

how long it takes for the fibre to dry is another unknowable variable. if it's warm and dry where you are, it might literally be overnight. if it's damp and cool, it can take days. the batch i posted a couple days ago literally took almost a full week to dry. spread it out as best you can, gently squeeze out the water you can, and otherwise you just have to wait.

you're done!

when it's dry, that's it, you're done! you might find that you need to pick off some little lint balls or a bit of compacted or slightly felted fibre from the tips, but other than that, you should be good to go.

like most fibre stuff, this is best maintained by handwashing in cool water. you may see a little bit of dye or colour loss the first time you wash it, which is pretty normal and nothing to worry about.

congratulations! you made it to the end of this incredibly long post, and if you followed along, you've just dyed some fibre!

troubleshooting

this isn't dyed enough! i want more colours!

add more dye! i'm not the boss of you.

this is true even after the fibre is all done and dryed. there's nothing that says you can't dye it again—you can, and i have.

some fibre seems to require more dye than others. silk, for example, dyes beautifully with acid dyes, but also needs way more dye than i expect it to.

remember that if you're dyeing something that's a wool/cotton blend, for example, the cotton isn't going to dye. the only exception is nylon, which will kinda dye, but not as dramatically. this guide will not work for plant fibres.

this is too dyed! i want fewer colours!

please refer back to the number one most important thing about dyeing, which—as you know—is: you can always add more colour, but you cannot take it away.

pull out some more fibre and try again. this has a learning curve, just like any other fibre craft.

these colours don't look like i expected!

this can be about a lot of things.

colour guides, especially if you're looking at them online, aren't always very accurate.

colour guides tend to assume that you're dyeing a single colour at the suggested dye percentage of weight, and using less than that will give paler colours.

dyes, especially if you're mixing brands, can interact with each other and behave in ways you didn't expect.

dyes can also break, which is when they split into their component colour molecules. this happens commonly with blacks and browns, food colouring, and anything that dharma trading has marked as 'advanced'. some people find this very desirable and seek it out; some people are very frustrated by it.

the ph of your water can sometimes affect your dye. i've been lucky enough that i've only lived places with lead problems, not weird ph stuff, so i haven't investigated this closely, but if you're consistently not getting the results you expect, even going for a single, solid-colour dye, look at the ph.

my dye water's not clear!

if you used a quarter teaspoon of dye and a hundred grams of fibre, and it's been, say, 45 minutes of actually hot water and your water still isn't clear, you probably didn't use enough mordant, and you should add some more citric acid or vinegar to encourage the dye to get in there and do its thing.

if you used you used more like a teaspoon of dye, or if the citric acid doesn't change anything, you used too much dye for your fibre. you can either shrug and pour it down the drain, or you can add some more fibre and dye that, too.

my rinse water's not clear!

you probably used too much dye. it's ok—just keep rinsing it, gently, until it's more or less clear.

some colours just like to run—you know how every once in a while you get a yarn and it just bleeds a little bit every time you wash it? sometimes it's just like that. i wouldn't worry about it too much.

my fibre has felty/clumpy bits!

a little bit of this is normal, especially at the ends of a fibre that felts easily (this means you, merino!)

pick off the bits that you don't like—this is generally fairly easy, and involves very minimal fibre loss. i don't bother doing it until i sit down to spin, and then just pull off bits as i come to them.

if there's a lot of felty/clumpy bits, more than you can reasonably pick out, you agitated the fibre too much. there's not much for this other than trying to card it out, which may or may not work.

sometimes this happens because your stove got weirdly aggressive and boiled your fibre. especially for wool that's prone to felting, the bubbling and jostling can be enough to encourage more clinginess than you'd like.

i want my dyeing to be reproducible!

this is kinda doable. it's a handmade thing, so it's always going to have some natural variance, but you can do it.

buy a jeweler's scale that measures in fractions of a gram.

start measuring your dye and acid, and take detailed notes about what you do.

follow those notes in the future, and you'll be probably 90% of the way there.

i want to dye with natural dyes!

i fully support this and have played around with it a little bit myself, but absolutely do not know enough about it to advise you.

the internet is very large and full of many people who are much smarter than i am, and i feel confident that at least one of them is desperate to tell you all about how to do natural dyeing.

i am, at this point, not that person.

i want to dye plant fibres!

i am begging you to find another guide, because this one will not work.

you didn't answer my question!

that's what my inbox is for

i have to reiterate that i'm just a person with real specific interests who started dyeing things because i couldn't find or afford the kinds of colourways that i wanted.

i am not a professional

i will do my best to answer questions, but sometimes the answer is 'just fuck around until you find out'

plant fi—

shhhhh

the end

thank you for reading this incredibly long post! i might make another one in the near future, either so i can show pictures or because i took out an entire section about how to choose colours and pick a colour scheme and work with colours, and i kinda want to talk more about that, but this is no joke almost six thousand words long, so i thought, you know. maybe not tonight.

anyhow, i hope that this was useful to someone! thank you for letting me talk about one of my very favourite things.

307 notes · View notes

kyluxtrashpit · 17 days

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So I really want to get another cat. Thing is, there’s several reasons why it’d be a good idea (boy has a playmate, I think my ideal number of cats is 2, and give a kitty in need of a home a nice one) but also a lot of reasons I know it’s not a good idea *right now*

First reason is I’m not sure I’m fully ready for it. There’s still a part of my brain that hopes that this new new cat (I’m gonna need another system when I do get one lmao) would act more like old cat and I’ve had enough pets to know that’s a red flag that means you’re not ready yet. It just leads to disappointment when your new pet doesn’t behave like the old one when they were never going to, every animal is a unique individual and no two will give the same experience even when they are similar. And I know this. But the heart still wants

Also two cats, especially when one is brand new to the living situation and is still adjusting, is more work than one and for several reasons my energy lately has been pretty low. So. Am I up for that right now? I’m not sure. I’m sure I could rise the occasion if it’s needed, but like. Would it be a good idea to put myself into that situation at the moment? I’m not sure it would be. Even if I do miss having two cats a lot

There’s also the matter of living situation. Last year I was hoping to move, as I’m getting to the point in my life where it is time to Purchase a living space instead of rent. Which is terrifying tbh lmao, but it is a thing none the less. Plus I just really want a bit more space at this point, and certain conveniences (oh how I long for my own laundry devices) that I don’t currently have. But with old cat, that just didn’t end up being in the cards cause my babies are always my priority above all else (the financial hit also didn’t help - I’m only just recovering from it now). I was simply not going to move while she was old and fragile and dying of cancer

However, my province also sucks! And it recently decided it’s gonna suck even more! Not as much as most of the US, at least not yet, but. It’s not promising. And the long term prospects are also Not Great (both in terms of social things and economically as well like, things are probably going to get worse long before they get better, if they ever do get better). And my city isn’t *the worst* but it’s more expensive than ideal. So it’s like. Do I want to buy a place here? I don’t know. But do I want to move out of this province? I also don’t know

Cause moving adds a lot of factors, even if I stay in the same province but look at a cheaper city. And leaving the province, okay, which to go to? This one’s nice but expensive and has weather I don’t like, and that ones cheap but also there’s a decent risk things will get worse there politically. And then there’s a risk the whole country will get fucked politically next year but I am doing my utmost to not worry about it until it is actually an immediate problem

And then there’s factors like, all the people I know are here (even if I’m bad at seeing them a lot). Familiar grocery stores and restaurants, other amenities, hell, my internet company is not fully national last I checked - will I have to switch providers? Work isn’t an issue as I work from home and we have people in multiple provinces, but like. Literally everything else is. I’ve lived here my entire life. I don’t know what it would be like to move that far. I’ve never done it

(And there’s also like. A sort of political responsibility. I read a lot after the shitty thing was announced and like. Some people are leaving. Some are staying because fuck you, bigots will not drive me from me home, I will fight back. Some are staying because they can’t afford to leave. And some are staying because if everyone who can leave does leave, then who’s left to at least try to fight this shit for those at risk who can’t get out? Especially as while I’m not in the demographic currently at risk, I’m in an adjacent one so it’s like. No, I’m not at risk yet but it’s possible I will be some day, but I also do feel some level of responsibility to try to help those who are currently at risk because I’m not)

And my dad is planning to leave (though unclear how firm that plan is right now and unclear exactly where) and is like ‘well come with me’ and I’m gonna be honest I. Don’t really want to like. I’m in my 30s. There is a part of me that feels like it’s time to get a bit more space from my family. My mom moved already for other reasons, so I don’t physically see her often, but technology is a thing so. Quite frankly my parents are both really bad at having friends so being literally the only person one of them knows in an entire city is kind of a nightmare scenario for me lmao. I need my space. I get annoyed when I get texted too often, I am NOT going to be your sole social contact. And I know that’s what would happen if we both moved to the same place with no one else. And even without all that, we have differences of opinions in “ideal place to live” so. I know they’re (dad goes by they/them) going to try to pressure me but if I’m sure of anything, it’s that I don’t want that

And, to circle this all back, there is also my kitty boy: he does NOT travel well. At all. He has panic attacks in the car that leave him panting and screaming within about 1 minute of being in there. We are trying to work on it, given transport is important for vet visits, but progress is slow. I was thinking he might have to get the old gaba just for me to be able to move within the city. He’s an anxious little guy. It’s gonna be tough for him, both the general realities of moving and the driving to the new place part. And I originally wasn’t really thinking of moving anywhere out of a 20 min or so radius of where I currently live partly for that reason

So to move to another province (and please remember Canada is Huge, like, this would be several hours or even multiple days of driving), I don’t know if I can even do that in a way that’s safe for him. Drugs are an option, but depending on where, it could be an unfeasibly long drive to do that with. And god, planes, I can only imagine how much worse he would be on a plane (even though I’d NEVER let him ride in the cargo, I’d buy an extra seat if I had to). He could have a stress-induced heart attack and die and if this is in transit, I’d be powerless to save him and I’d have to live the rest of my life knowing I killed him

And so with all of that, I’m like. I really can’t get another cat until I know wtf I’m doing and implement that because it would be awful for the new kitty if I got them and then immediately moved somewhere, either close or far. I can’t do that, it would be cruel. So like. Idk, I just don’t know what to do

I’m also aware that like. There are two problems in this ramble and the one I opened with is not really the larger one lmao but like. Genuinely I do not know what to do and that’s scary so I’m just kinda frozen here thinking how nice it would be to have a second floof gallivanting around the apartment but also knowing I can’t really have that right now (unless the cat distribution system decides to give me no choice in the matter lmao but I’m not expecting that to happen)

#this is a long ramble but I am just #I really don’t know what to do #and I’m trying my best to just. idk ignore it for now and hope something will happen #that will make the decision obvious #but right now I just don’t know #so. ramble time lmao #cause even though it’s a low key anxiety by my standards #it’s just kinda sitting in the back of my head at all times and I just feel stuck tbh #and I really really do want to get another cat #but I can’t make that decision until everything else is sorted and I’m mentally ready so #I cannot have another fluffy baby yet :(#I’ve had this drafted for a while but I’ve been thinking about it off and on for like. months honestly #text #misc #shut up nerd

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nxghttme · 2 years

Text

There’s a knock on the door. You already knew who it is. Pressing on the button to ask who it is, you hear Yuuji talk back, “Hey, you know it's me already!” You laugh at his response, telling him to come on up after buzzing him in. You have the exact amount placed on the coffee table by your door, so he wouldn’t have to bring out his wallet to give you your change.

Opening the door, there's his usual yellow jacket, and the paper bag of your order hanging tightly in his other hand while the other is saluting right at you. “Here’s your usual.” Handing it over, your palms feel his knuckles, the heat of the chicken underneath sufficing for the warmth you imagine his hand would be. As soon as you give him money he sighs, looking over at you, “You’re the best customer. Most days, they see me picking up the change they accidentally let go on the floor.” He shakes his head, folding the money in half before putting it in his wallet.

“That’s awful. You know, just because they don’t know you doesn’t give them a reason to be so rude.” You can't imagine how tough it must be, delivering their chicken in the city all by himself. They may have an Itadori's Chicken Wings Palace delivery app, but still, it doesn’t help that Yuuji does it all alone. His grandfather owns and runs the place, cooks and wraps up orders. Yuuji once told you they have a few employees for assistance, but the delivery is all him. Having to check his phone from time to time while on a motorcycle, no less. He had to learn how to ride one, since he can't drive and they don't own a car, and taxis cost too much, he eventually learned how.

“It's still annoying, but hey, what can you do? Customers are always right.” He scratches the back of his head, looking away from the door.

“So, how’s your grandfather?” You ask.

He stammers the minute you mention him. “Not so great. I keep telling him he needs to go to the hospital. But you know how he is he never listens.”

You have yet to meet the man himself, but Yuuji never fails to mention him on his deliveries which you enjoy. He'd always praise his old man, telling you how much he appreciates her feedback on their business app so much as to include an extra piece or two on every order she made after.

“Tell him I’ll order a thousand more if he goes with you to the hospital,” you say with a proud smile, convinced your relationship is as close as a grandfather with his granddaughter.

Yuuji laughs, shrugging in content at you, “Well, I better get going.” He tucks in the hat, covering his salmon hair and he smiles before leaving, “See ya on Thursday?”

“Oh, yeah. I’m bringing out the big guns by then. I promise.” You say, rather enthusiastically.

“Whoa, are you having friends over?” You know it was a joke. You brush it off by shaking your head.

“Alright, you take care of yourself, miss.” Without further ado, he leaves. As he runs off, you wait for his footsteps to fade before locking your door, placing the hot chicken meal on your bed.

Turning on the TV, you bask in your empty apartment. It’s always been like this. You’ve definitely gotten used to it. There's no other place to go other than your place, and university. Sometimes, groceries. You’ve never liked going outside your home. You’re fully aware how you hate having to meet strangers. Which is why, when you first moved in here, you had your phone at the ready for nearby take-outs to deliver at your doorstep. Itadori’s Chicken Wings Palace was at the farthest part of the app store. They’re a small business place, according to the pictures they provided. You've never visited yourself.

In the app, it works like an online shopping thing where it displays their menu, with the price and delivery fee, and surprisingly, the name of the courier assigned to hand over your order. That’s when you met him. Cute little Yuuji. Cute little Yuuji you'd developed a crush on. The initial meeting wasn’t ideal. At all.

You were in an oversized shirt, stained with chips and gravy, you refused to focus on your appearance over watching what happens next on old romcom films you've seen a thousand times. And then the doorbell rings, there's Yuuji, standing there in an awkward pose, carrying your order. He was rather friendly, despite your reluctance to greet him. You found he was around your age. Still, he didn't mind that you had to count the payment with your fingers three times before handing it over to him. He told you about a customer who ordered the same meal and even though he had to wait 10 minutes before being paid, he figured he was rather grateful for gestures like that. He knew they cared. It didn't matter to you at the time. You chuckled nervously until he finally left.

But then he kept coming back. You thought it was a coincidence. He'd always greet you differently each time. Sometimes he'd salute with a funny commanding officer voice, sometimes like a chill best friend who planned to have a party with you, and your personal favorite—an old friend you hadn't seen in a very long time. By the fifth time, you finally asked what his deal was. Why is he the only one constantly delivering your chicken? And then he told you about their situation. You couldn't help but feel pity over it. You tipped him an extra, to which he couldn't accept, but you insisted, returning the favor by saluting to him with your own funny voice. Both of you laughed at the little inside joke.

He must've sensed you don't go out much. You made a friend out of chicken take-outs.

Unwrapping the chicken meal, its smell engulfs your apartment. Displaying it on your plate, on the table beside your bed, you design it with overloaded gravy, salivating at the view. They really know how to make it scrumptious. They never fail to. Oh! You almost forget. Picking up the phone, you rate Yuuji as well as the order with 5 stars, commenting how much you recommend the place. Sadly, you don't have any social media app to share this on, other than messenger, in case your class has any updates regarding homework or surprise quizzes by your professor.

With the TV blasting at full volume, you check the door for the last time if it was really locked. Confirming this, you tuck yourself under the blankets first, dialing an unknown number's name. Your hand finds its place by your hip. Upon picking up, the voice itself makes your toes curl.

“Hey, baby, comin’ in for more?”

“Oh, yes, daddy.” The index of your finger fumbles the fabric of your underwear. His raspy voice always gets to you. He knows your number. He knows what you like to do in bed. He knows everything, your most vulnerable state, without having to meet him face to face.

“Mmf.” He moans, hearing his belt come undone on the other line. “What are you wearing right now, pet?”

“ Nothing .” You purr.

“Liar.” He clicks his tongue. “I’m taking off your shirt. I wanna see those plump, well-rounded breasts. ” You shudder, imagining his touch as you lift the shirt enough to reveal your lace bra.

“Kiss me.” You order.

The voice makes a sound, licking, you place the vibration on your neck, your panties nearly consumed by your wet throbbing clit. “Oh, princess, you taste so good.” You both gasp simultaneously, adding to your stimulation.

“I'm sliding off your panties. Your wet hot panties.” You do as he says, slowly, revealing yourself underneath the blanket. “I'm sucking on your tits,” You suck on your fingers, rubbing it on your breasts. “I'm staring at you and your fucking beautiful face. Suck my fingers, suck daddy's fingers for me, baby,” You bring the other hand that's been exploring under the sheets to your mouth, moaning some more.

“Di… Did I do good, daddy?”

“Oh, yes, baby, you're such a… good girl...” He's sighing, panting at your voice. “Fuck, my cock can't take it anymore. I love your fucking voice so much.”

“I've been so wet. M...My pussy… please…”

He chuckles, his deep voice—you can feel him hovering above you as you speak. You imagine his eyes staring deep into yours, wanting to take every inch of your body. “Baby, baby, I want you to suck me off.”

You bring back your fingers to your mouth, tasting yourself. “Is...that...good…” you say in between the sloshing of your mouth, and he grunts, and he groans, and his speed is coming faster.

“I'm almost—”

“I'm climbing on top of you—” You grab a pillow from your bed, sliding in its corner to your dripping cunt. You go at a slow pace at first, eventually building up steam as low as his voice could escape.

“Y...You're so beautiful… Fuck… I can feel your fucking thighs. I'm grabbing them. I'm slapping your fucking ass, you fucking slut. You're such a good slut to daddy… I'm pulling on your pretty, pretty long hair... ”

You can't help it. You pull your own hair, feeling his hands run on your neck, down to your breasts, to the stomach, and then—your fingers rub on the clit, “I'm—I'm—!”

“Cum for me, my sweet, sweet angel. Cum! Come on, cum! We'll do it together—”

But you don't hear him. Your pillow is soaking wet. You bring yourself, plopping down on the bed, sprawled across the sheets, breasts not getting any smaller from your view. You feel yourself spurting. The man chuckles on the other line. You feel as if he's in bed next to you. You chuckle back.

“Thanks, baby. Just hearing your voice,” He inhales, breathing onto the speaker. “Satisfies me. ”

“Don't worry,” you stand from the bed, tying your hair back in a bun. “I'll pay you your worth.” Washing your hands over the sink, you can still feel your legs tremble with his voice on the line.

“I'm glad you enjoyed my service today. You're a regular.”

“Can you stop talking already, I want to be decent.” You smile, feeling him chuckle.

“Sure thing, angel. ”

#yuji itadori #jujutsu itadori #yuji smut #jjk x reader #jjk smut #jjk x y/n #yuji x y/n #yuji x reader #smut #kinktober #itadori smut #jjk

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beardedmrbean · 6 months

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Wait wasn’t it the boomers that preach to us this “We need to save the world!” shit? I mean would could have better eco system if wasn’t for say

1. The US, USSR/China piss competition that was the Cold War

2. SEVERAL countries being fucked over thanks to the push of communism/US meddling/ etc and many of those countries are still recovering from it.

3. I mean in the west developed countries, people have fucking meltdowns over a Japan McDonald’s wholesome family tweet. So our family unit need some fixing

4. Manufactured nihilism, so a lot of people don’t give about themselves much less the environment.

5. Have corporations that being run by medically confirmed sociopaths.

I can say more, but Greta sweetie, I know you want to do good, but blaming the older generation thinking many were hellbent on destroying the earth isn’t so simple. Many do/did want to save the world, but we have to deal with the fallout of ww2, communist dumbasses, and so much more with humanity itself before we can do the ideal environmentalism.

Was confused for a moment till I remembered I'd scheduled that one, was gonna run it yesterday but I had to get around the subscription wall which is more complicated than a paywall.

In the end just archiving it works but the links in the article don't work if you do that, which is what I had to do.

It's not even the stuff you're mentioning up there either. I had a 1966 Plymouth Fury III there was this weird green plastic thing with a device inside it and a couple vacuum hoses attached to it, one in one out.

Primitive Smog control device, if you never worked on older cars that were manufactured for sale in California you'll never see one, but every vehicle sold in CA had a smog control device for the longest time, all changed when the auto industry realized it was cheaper to just do the same thing to every car, it's something that's been going on since before I was even born though, so current generation isn't the first to care or take action.

Been lots of missteps along the way, the shift from paper bags to plastic ones at grocery stores is a big one, people thought it would save the trees and it didn't do much there and now we've got a totally different problem.

Hole in the ozone layer on the other hand, we got that issue taken care of and it's on the mend, has been since long before gretta was born too.

National parks predate my grandparents, thanks Teddy, leaving large swaths of land alone for the purpose of conservation.

My grandparents when they got their pool installed in the early 80's had a big fat solar water heater installed so it could heat the water for that as well as the water for the house, weren't super common but they existed and were in use by people who wanted to both be nice to the earth and lower their gas bill at the same time.

Nearly all of the solutions being discussed by the young climate weekend warriors involve technology developed for the purpose they want it used for before they were born.

I'm just dandy with people wanting to save the earth, I've been trying to do my part for decades now, which I would appreciate it if gretta and co would acknowledge instead of acting like they're the first people ever to give a damn.

Several centuries of damage all culminating at the peak of the industrial revolution that we need to undo, that takes time and being a snobby, whiny, self important, twit who bashes everyone who came before her, who's shoulders she's standing on, doesn't do anything real.

And quite possibly does more harm than good.

Not going to totally blame her though, she did start out as a pawn on someone else's game and to some extent she still is.

#anonymous

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doggernaut · 2 years

Text

Who me? Attempting to write a cozy Zimbits slice-of-life romance? It’s more likely than you think …

It would be too kind to say Jack Zimmermann, Pulitzer Prize winner and son of legendary newspaper publisher Bob Zimmermann, resigned in disgrace mere days before the biggest story of his life broke without his name on the byline. That’s what his father is telling people. That’s what Jack himself is telling people, even though the lie goes against everything he’s been taught as a journalist.

But somehow it seems slightly less bad then the truth, which is that Jack was fired, by his own father, for getting too close to a source, blowing his chance at breaking the story he’d been working on for six months, and compromising the paper’s integrity as a purveyor of unbiased journalism, all in one fell swoop.

Jack was twelve when he started his first blog. “This is a Hockey Blog” was a digital shrine to his favorite players when he’d been a hockey-obsessed kid who wasn’t quite athletic enough to move on with all of his friends when they made the local elite travel team. Jack wasn’t a great hockey player, but even at twelve he was great at writing about hockey, and it gave him access to a world he still wanted to be part of. By the time he graduated from college it was a semi-professional publication, with gear reviews and player interviews and Jack’s own hockey opinions. He could have gone into sports reporting, taken a job with ESPN or Sports Illustrated, and maybe he should have. If he’d stuck with sports, he wouldn’t be where he is now.

Which is living with his parents, unable to get an interview with any reputable newspaper, and seriously considering submitting an application for a job at the INNquirer, a bi-weekly paper in Vermont. The posting is for a writer/editor/photojournalist, but under “additional duties,” is an unusual requirement:

“Applicant will also be scheduled to man (or woman, or nonbinarily represent) the front desk of a small Victorian hotel for two or three shifts a week.”

The listing goes on to indicate that lodging and meals (“and all the coffee you can drink and pie you can eat”) are included and honestly, the whole thing sounds kind of bizarre, like maybe it’s somebody’s idea of a prank—or a hallucination Jack has dreamed up in order to avoid facing reality. But he clicks on the link to the paper’s digital edition and it seems to be real, even if the “INNquirer’s” most recent stories are about a small fire at a nearby garbage dump and a missing parrot who recently returned to its owner.

It’s not ideal. The work sounds much slower-paced than what Jack is used to. Answering phones and checking guests in doesn’t sound enjoyable. But it’s a job. It would get him out of this house and this city. It’s far enough away that he won’t accidentally run into Kent at the grocery store.

Jack is running out of options. Forget the L.A. Times and Washington Post; he can’t even get somebody from the Sacramento Bee to call him back. He could go the standard route of other former journalists, get a job as a publicist at a university or hospital, but he’s always been better at asking the questions instead of answering them. Especially now, when the question everybody’s asking him is, “What were you thinking?”

Jack’s had plenty of time to think about all the ways he’s fucked up his life, but he still doesn’t have an answer. It’s something he’d prefer not to address in a job interview, yet it’s going to be impossible to avoid.

But … this job is in a remote area of Vermont, so remote Jack’s never even heard of it. It’s obvious the person who wrote the ad doesn’t know the first thing about journalism, or possibly even running an inn, so they’re unlikely to recognize Jack as the Jack Zimmermann who just blew up his personal and professional life in a very public way. The work he’s done for the hockey blog, though out of date, is better than work being done by most entry-level reporters. It’s certainly good enough to include in his application.

Jack’s considering the best way to word his cover letter when his phone lights up with an incoming text.

You there, Zimms?

Kent. Jack ignores the message and turns back to his computer. A few minutes later, three more texts arrive in quick succession.

You’ve been ignoring my texts.

I know your old man shit canned you and I feel partially responsible, so I’m gonna make it up to you.

I’m announcing my mayoral candidacy at a press conference next week. I’d like you to be my communications director.

Jack first instinct is to reply, something along the lines of Are you delusional? or Fuck off, Kenny, but he resists the urge. To respond would be to give Kent what he wants, a way in. Jack has been down this road before. Kent has this way of making himself comfortable, of making Jack forget why they don’t work. The last time Jack lost himself to Kent, he lost everything.

Jack blocks Kent’s number and turns his phone to ‘Do Not Disturb.’ If Jack’s request not to contact him hasn’t gotten through to him, maybe this will.

Before he can second guess himself, Jack dashes off a cover letter and sends it, along with his resume and link to the hockey blog, to the paper in Vermont. He probably won’t get the job. It’s probably not even real.

To be continued …

#omgcp #zimbits fic #au

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lori0018 · 1 year

Text

10 Fics

I was tagged by @nyxelestia

Rules: Post the first lines of your last 10 fics posted to AO3. (Sort by date posted.) If you have less than 10 fics posted, post what you have!

They are all for KinnPorsche the series. (I don't have an obsession, I don't know what you mean *nudges her WIP folder out of sight*)

1) Owner’s Manual

(KimChay, with some KinnPorsche in chapter 2, holiday fluff, 2k words)

It’s almost Christmas and Chay is scrambling for gifts. Online shopping and his new and improved wallet contents have helped a lot but there are so many more gifts to get than he is used to that it feels like a daunting task. So daunting that he’s left it to the week before the Christmas Eve party where they will be exchanging said gifts. So now he’s scrambling.

2) Family, Extended

(Implied Chan/Nampeung, part 3 of That's My Family series, 1k words)

The first time Chan sees her, he's a fresh-faced nineteen years old, still clinging to some of his idealism. He is one of two bodyguards accompanying Khun Korn to his foster sister's wedding.

3) Family means…

(Mostly Gen, with some minor KimChay, very minor VegaPete, and implied future KinnPorsche, was supposed to be Kim & Porsche centric but turned into "Kinn has a lot of feelings about this" instead 😆, part 2 of That's My Family series, 9k words)

There is a universe in which Kim, battered and bleeding, falls unconscious in the back of a dark alley, out of sight from the street, and isn’t found until many days later. By then, he’s bled out on the dirty alley floor and there is nothing to be done. The funeral is lavish and his brothers mourn him.

(I'm realizing that the 1st paragraph makes this story look a lot darker than it is 😅)

4) Memento Mori, Memento Vivere

(Fix-it retelling of the show, Porsche-centric, based on the premise that Porsche remembers what happened to his parents, 34k words)

Porsche remembers. He remembers bright sunny days and bright warm laughter. He remembers running up to Mom and holding out a flower for her. He remembers her smile and baby Porchay’s bright giggle as the flower tickled his nose.

5) Game of Survival

(Arm & Tankhun backstory, 2.5k words)

The screaming from downstairs starts anew and his shoulders hunch, head dropping between them as if it would block out the sound. He wishes he could put headphones on and tune out the world but his old, shitty ones stopped working weeks ago now and there has been no barrier between the world and him since. He wishes there was a bit of money for new ones but any money mom earns goes to the few groceries she manages to buy on the way or to the liquor store as soon as she gets home and he gets his hands on it.

6) if ever I could make it back for us

(KimChay, part 8 of need you to believe series, 11.5k words)

In the first few weeks after reaching his decision, Chay tries to go to the club again. He gets turned back at the door, apparently on some sort of blacklist. He’s not sure if it’s just him or if Kim (if that was even his real name) does that to all the people he sleeps with. He doesn’t have anything else to go on, no last name, no phone number, no address, so he tries a few times, without luck. Alright then. At least, he can say he tried.

7) Kissing You

(KimChay, fluff, 5+1 times, 1.5k words)

WiꞰ is doing a live stream. Chay has never been happier that Porsche is working late because it means he can stream it on the TV and watch WiꞰ talk to his fan in high-def glory. The stream has been going on for a while now and WiꞰ is starting to wrap it up. He’s been reading comments aloud throughout the stream and responding to a lot of them. He had even read two of Chay’s and one of them made him laugh and it makes Chay feel braver than he might usually be. So when WiꞰ announces he’s going to read one last comment, Chay types something and waits, fingers crossed and heart hammering in his chest.

[Skipped 2 works which aren't fics.]

8) "That's my family"

(Kittisawats + Kim, written for the KinnPorsche week 2022, part 1 of That's My Family series, 1.5k words)

Kim grunts as the blow lands but he pushes the pain away, taking advantage of the temporary opening to land a blow of his own. His opponent slumps, unconscious, and Kim tries to catch his breath, as much as he can with what he is pretty sure are broken ribs, while he takes in the situation. All the men who attacked him are down. Dead or unconscious, he doesn't know and he's not going to take the time to find out. He needs to get out before more of them show up.

(The 1st paragraph, once again, makes the story look darker than it is 🤷‍♀️)

9) “Can I try?”

(Kittisawat brothers feels, fluff, >1k words)

It starts when Chay learns to talk.

10) It just all goes to hell

(KimChay, Nampeung, part 5 of need you to believe series, 2k words)

The gunshot echoes in the room and Chay flinches, tightening his hold on Kira, who whimpers in his arms.

The 10 people I’m tagging are @accal1a @bisexualbard @coleslaww @cloudburst-ink @cristalknife @highpriestessofjogan @mightymightygnomepriest @staykimchay @vani-ash @xxatlasxx (And anyone else who wants to do this!)

#tag game #lori writes #kinnporche the series #kimchay #kinnporsche #fanfic

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inverttheory · 6 months

Note

this is a random question but what would you say are some core facets of canadian identity? like i.e. pretty much every american feels tied to concepts of freedom and free speech and the (bullshit) american dream etc. is there a lot of canada-as-a-country pride there or is it like a province by province thing. i don't know how canada works

it definitely depends where you're looking . quebec is in a league of its own in terms of cultural identity, being french-speaking and more closely tied to france/europe . you'd be very hard pressed to find a person from quebec who identified more as a canadian than a quebecois, and i'm sure even people outside canada know that quebec has wanted to split off for a very long time . after quebec (this is in my personal experience) for strong ties to provincial identity is probably newfoundland, again understandable since they're more isolated, a newer addition, and have a different accent than canada at large . third place is probably alberta although this is way more common in the older generation . there was actually an alberta separatist movement, partially because we have a sort of unique identity among canadians being both prairies & mountains but more importantly alberta is / was the richest province because we have so much oil, and so many albertans feel like the rest of canada leeches off of us without giving us fair dues . i'm not going to comment on that though lol .

definitely the "bigger" an area you go to, the more people's identities will be tied to being canadian over provincial . ontario especially sort of (from what i have seen) consider themselves the default canadians, and so their national identity is very strong . but you'll find people like that across the country, for sure .

i think there's a strong generational divide between how older people conceptualize canadian identity, and how younger people do . older people are definitely more loyal to the crown / concerned with british affairs, and also have their identity more tied up in the american ideal of freedom / being able to create a "good life", while younger canadians have by-and-large bought into the idea of politeness and canada as a multicultural place . politeness especially is a huge identity thing for us especially when travelling abroad, ie most young canadians think the world loves us because we are so polite (and to be fair, every time i've travelled abroad people love when they find out i'm canadian) . young people also feel a lot less respect for the country as a whole from what i have seen, considering their awareness of how canada treated/treats indigenous people, which adds a layer of complexity to how many people are able to form/understand their national identity

we also do, young and old, love our stereotypes ie. maple syrup, moose & beavers & canada geese, hockey, tim hortons . i can't believe i forgot to mention it but hockey is seriously HUGE here and very very hugely tied to national identity. i don't give a fuck about hockey but on game nights the streets are flooded, the bars are packed, when i worked in a grocery store it was dead on game nights & when i lived next to a stadium it was insane . people here don't really care about most sports except hockey .

personally if i find out someone is canadian i'm far more interested in which province they're from, but there's definitely an appreciation for canadian art/movies/music (which the cbc also helps to push) & the country as a whole feels much more "like home" than anywhere else could be, and i don't think i'm in the minority for feeling that way

so tldr probably a lot like america where provinces tend to have unique identities but also ascribe to the core nationalism of canada, as a bilingual, free, & hospitable place . this is most a white/non-indigenous perspective but this post is getting super long & i also don't want to speak over indigenous people

#i hope this was interesting !#if you ask me about canada/alberta i will give you a novel .

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sunken-standard · 2 years

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Sunken's Half-assed Lacto-fermented Radish Kraut-chi Tutorial (or, how to use salt and time to make radishes edible and not poison yourself)

Start with some radishes, whatever you have—Cherry Belles, Sparklers, French Breakfast, White Icicle, Daikon, etc. These are 5.5lbs of Korean Diakon (“Alpine Gold” hybrid) from my garden. You can peel them or not; I don't peel what I grow or buy from local farms, but I do peel things from the grocery store.

Slice them however you want. Coins, matchsticks, quarters (for smaller radishes), cubes, it's all up to you. Different sizes and shapes give different textures and have different fermentation times. Throw them in a bowl and salt to taste. They should be pleasantly salty; not so much that it burns your mouth, but not too lightly either. The sweet spot for me is a little less salty than the average potato chip.

Now you can add your other stuff, if you want. Plain old brined and fermented radishes are yum on their own. I want more of my half-assed kimchi though, so I'm using red cabbage (any will do, I had the red on hand), carrots, sweet onions (from a local farm; green onions work too), ginger, garlic, an apple (yes that was a Red Delicious, and no I didn't use it after all because it was rotten inside, but I did use a Honeycrisp instead), and Gochugaru (this stuff is the mild kind). I only used about half of the ginger and garlic pictured and added more carrot, but you get the idea. If you're using cabbage, keep a few of the (clean, nice-looking) outer leaves for later. You can shred the rest or cut it into squares to be a little closer to real kimchi.

Chop everything up, mixing and tasting as you go--before and after adding more salt. After it's all chopped and mixed and salted and happy, let it sit (covered to keep beasties out) for a half hour to two hours (or even longer, you won't ruin it if you accidentally fall asleep, eh heh).

(I go relatively light on the gochugaru because I’m a wuss)

Make sure you have enough jars or whatever you're going to use for the fermentation. I thought two half-gallons would be enough, but I was wrong. Washing with soap and water is enough, they don't need to be boiled or otherwise sanitized.

Pack the vegetables into the jar, trying the squish out the air spaces as you go. It's going to create a lot of its own brine, and there will be liquid left in the bottom of the mixing bowl (pour that in the jar). The juice probably won't cover the vegetables, so you can top it off with plain brine made at a ratio of 1.5 tsp to 1c water, which should be boiled and cooled if you have city water (to get rid of the chlorine) but doesn't have to be if using well or bottled water. Squish it down again after adding the brine, or use a chopstick to poke around and get the air bubbles out.

If you saved a cabbage leaf, now's the time to mash it into the jar to cover all the vegetables and keep them under the brine. It's not necessary, it just keeps stuff neater. Some people use plastic wrap, but I don't like that myself If I don't have a leaf I just fill the jar about ¾ and cover it with more brine. Weight it down with something (I have fancy glass fermentation weights for jars, but a plastic bag of salt or beans or brine works fine).

Put the lid on the jar loosely (or if you're using something like a crock, cover with a heavy cloth and secure with string or a rubber band), label and date it, and keep it somewhere that doesn't get too hot or too cold, ideally out of direct sunlight. Oh, and put it on a plate or a tray or something, leakage is normal, even if you think you haven't overfilled the jars (ask me how I know -_-). You'll see little bubbles starting about 24 hours later—this is good and means it's cookin'.

(These are dill pickles I started ~48h earlier)

Burp the jars daily and start tasting after about 3 days. When it's sour and the vegetables are a little soft (it'll smell funky, kind of like farts and warm onions, but it's fine), it's ready to go in the fridge. It'll keep for months, maybe even years; just remember to check it because it does keep fermenting, just at a much slower rate.

So yeah, that's it. Sounds like a lot, but it's so, so easy. This is a jar I did like a month ago and I've already eaten about 1/3 of it:

#fermenting #kimchi adjacent #kraut-chi #food in jars #sunken does something useful

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whenwilll1beperfect · 2 years

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How To Enjoy Tea (And Why You Should Try To)

Okay first of all why: it fills you up. Holy fuck does the warmth fill you up. I haven't wanted to eat solid food since I started drinking tea again. Also good for you in general, especially green tea for your metabolism, and it tastes better than plain water (even ice water).

Now for how. This is long but I swear it's worth it if you have no idea where to start with tea.

Variety packs are your best friend when you are first trying out tea, especially if you don't know people who drink tea that can let you try out some of their flavors. Celestial seasonings is my favorite tea brand, and they have a lot of variety packs, but so do other brands. Think about what flavors you like to eat or drink. I like fruit a lot so of course I got their fruit variety pack. Pick out what sounds most appealing to you first, but even if you don't like it, DON'T GIVE UP, try other flavors. I promise you, you will find at least one tea that you like, even if it isn't in that variety pack. Also I try to avoid teas that say "stress relief" but mention nothing about the flavor. I don't usually believe that it will relieve my stress while I'm standing in the grocery store having done no research on whether that tea will in fact relieve my stress or not, and because of their crappy marketing I now also have no idea what it will taste like. Pick out a tea that at least attempts to tell you what it tastes like.

The first time you brew a cup of tea, follow the directions on the package to the best of your ability. You can play with amount of water, temperature, steeping time, etc. later, but it's important to taste the tea when it's made exactly how you're supposed to make it so that you know whether you like it or not. You might not have a tea kettle that gets it to an exact temp, that's okay, usually it mentions boiling or almost boiling or something like that along with the ideal temperature, so even if you don't know exactly what temp the water is you can try to go off of that. Also think about whether you would like it better it if the taste was stronger, you can always add another tea bag or reduce the amount of water next time. It's not always better to steep it for longer, tea bags release tannins which make it taste a little more bitter if it's in for too long. Depending on how the tea is made it might have more or less tannins, so just be careful. At the same time, too many times to count I have thrown one tea bag in a 24oz travel mug and left it in there until I was done with the tea. It depends on the tea and on your taste buds, but I've never had a problem with it, I just want you to be careful and not blame the tea if it's too bitter but you steeped it for an hour.

STEVIA. I love putting stevia in my tea. Stevia will not break your fast, it's super sweet, it's more potent than sugar, it's awesome. I think it enhances the flavor of the tea, but even if it doesn't enhance the flavor for you, it will make it sweeter. BUT the first time you try a certain tea, try it without any extras first, you might not need sweeteners for this tea.

Remember that you might not like certain kinds of tea plain (I hate plain green tea), but a lot of companies combine other flavors with it. Again, celestial seasonings for the win. Candy cane lane is green tea but it tastes more minty and I don't even like mint that much but I think it's really good. Boom. Tazo green ginger tea? Didn't think I would like it but damn it's actually good. Both green teas that actually taste good. Another reason I like celestial seasonings is because candy cane lane is a holiday flavor but I can buy it at the same price at the end of August as in December, and on amazon no less.

Here are my favorite teas:

Celestial seasonings raspberry zinger, white chocolate peppermint, candy cane lane, vitamin c shine (with some stevia thrown in there it literally tastes like heated up fruit juice it's so good). Yogi detox tea (don't know that I believe that it helps detox anything but it's a yummy spicy tea).

Don't get too hung up on which teas will be healthiest for you, obviously if you find a green tea or an oolong tea that you like, go for it, but tea in general is incredibly healthy. Plus, I'm guessing if you’re on edblr you don't care too much about your health, just increasing your metabolism or suppressing your appetite. Not all teas will increase your metabolism but warm liquid will certainly curb your appetite.

Please lmk if you have any questions and I will be happy to answer them or tell you that I have no idea lol.

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self-h-rmageddon · 3 months

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ramble about my aromantic tendencies cuz im all. confused im SURE theres a word for this i just think im not ready??? i think like. not in a personal way, in a PHYSICAL way like something needs to change before id ever CONSIDER IT, makes me sick otherwise like theres so many things!! so many hurdles and stuff that would deter me from all that nonsense but i still like the idea of it like the idea is so sweet, its why i enjoy it so much in fiction but. in execution? IDK MAN.. freaks me out for so many reasons

romantic love is so cute bro like. its genuinely adorable to me, i love listening to love songs and just feeling the emotion and passion behind all the words, but ummmmmmm. i think realistically im capable? i just think that any attempt wouldnt go well, i dont think i can give someone what they might need, its always been like. okay 1. im going to be OBSESSED with you ill do anything you say ill let you mistreat and abuse me ill do anything for you okay which is not ideal!! not ideal, made for bad people dont want bad people. but?? on the other hand its also like i cant imagine loving another person more than i love my friends, but thats whats expected of me isnt it? i think they wouldnt like it very much if i had an equal amount but like. is it even possible? I REALLY DONT KNOW.. i know ive said it before, i just feel like. love, not platonic not romantic just LOVE pure unlabeled love. what kind of treatment would i give to a partner that i dont already give to my friends? itd go really wrong there im sure, i dont wanna hurt anybody yknow

idk its like such a cute little fantasy tho isnt it? maybe i meet someone and we become friends and then it leads to something more, is going on dates fun? maybe it would be but. i go on dates with my friends!!!!!! like is it different? i guess, but im out with someone i love i dont see how it could be much different

sometimes it feels like people like me dont get that. its hard to be good enough for someone else, like. i know theres like 8 billion people in the world but its always. im too fat im trans im not hot enough im too mentally ill im too awkward too. TOO EVERYTHING!! so on top of like. how can someone possible be more than what i already have, i have to be good enough too!!!!! so much work, i honestly. after brian, i was so content to just fall back on fictional characters, i know it sounds silly but self shipping LITERALLY saved my life i was hanging by a thread after him and then i found a coping mechanism that made me feel so good

i think its uncertainty, when it comes to fictional relationship? i make the rules, the scenarios, its perfect for me but. in real life you cant do that, im thrown in BLIND. i know its part of life, you learn and grow together but erm... im autistic please dont do this to me PLEASE if i plan out my conversation at a grocery store with the clerk and im STILL THROWN OFF... yeeowch!!

thats the thing im very offputting to other people like. something about me, i can see it in their eyes, see the way they kinda. like im. somethings all wrong with me!!!! they dont like it, i cant imagine myself being charming but.. maybe if i start T, ill be less. dreadfully anxious about seeing other people, then maybe ill flourish a little more. we'll see, it still freaks me out the thought of loving someone more than my friends like TO ME i dont think its possible and i dont want to find out about it okay it makes me sick it feels like betrayal, never tell me otherwise or ill feel awful, its betrayal to me!!!! cuz i want to give my friends the most i can give, they deserve it, so like. what, am i supposed to give less? give someone else more?? like ew who are you1!!! i dont need you i just need my besties thats all i need :] but its still a nice thought isnt it? its cute

i think i just have like a limit on the amount of people i can know at one time, ive always wanted more friends and i have more friends now!! sooo i dont realy need anyone else then? its very easy for me to feel satisfied with what i have, of course i am!!! grateful even!!!! so im like. it just doesnt matter so much to me. nice thought but i dont see it happening like i dont really WANT it to happen like i do but also. like. listen.

am i still gonna throw down to little love songs? absolutely yes sir!! to me tho like its feelings i can easily project onto my friends SKFJS like how me and my bestie kiss eachother on the head okay. because i loooooove them, its so easy because i love them!! its a love song, i dont care what kind of love its made for, i feel love and ill hear it how i want :] ITS. its some weird social bullshit okay, who says we cant? who says we cant go on little friend dates and kiss and hug and be in love with eachother while also being JUST friends? WHO SAYS!!!! its what i dont get, theres some disconnect between romantic and platonic love that i dont see at all. why should one be more valued than the other? hogwash okay its gobbledygook its. nonsense!!! im glad i dont see it that way, the hard part is finding other people who also dont see it that way, i realize my feelings on it arent STANDARD.. still, im satisfied. i have a lot of love to give and im always allowed to give it, isnt that so wonderful?

#i said like 34 times here #very californian of me #this is some crazy bpd moodswing shit alright i know i sound very whimsical here but #watch me crash in like 20 minutes into the deepest darkest depression ever witnessed #maybe ill survive actually. its hard to feel very upbeat at all given the circumstance #this is the lightest ive felt since he went missing #it will not last. why would it

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salientscents · 3 months

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Choosing the best wax for your candles

Choosing the Best Wax for Your Candles

Candles are a great way to create a cozy and relaxing atmosphere in your home. They can also fill your space with delightful aromas and enhance your mood. But did you know that not all candles are made equal? The type of wax that is used to make a candle can have a significant impact on its performance, appearance, and quality. In this article, we will explore the different types of wax that are commonly used for candle making, and help you choose the best one for your needs.

Types of Wax for Candle Making

There are many types of wax that can be used to make candles, but the most popular ones are:

Soy Wax

This is a natural wax that is derived from soybean oil. It is one of the most eco-friendly and renewable waxes available, as it does not produce any harmful byproducts or toxins when burned. Soy wax is biodegradable and has a creamy and smooth texture. It can also hold a lot of fragrance oil and it burns slowly and evenly, creating a long-lasting candle. However, soy wax also has many drawbacks compared to other types, such as being prone to frosting (a white crystalline layer on the surface of the candle), having a lower melt point (which can affect its stability in hot weather), and requiring a longer curing time (which can delay the release of the scent). It also generally has a harder time getting a strong scent throw (how strong the fragrance is) and is aesthetically less pleasing vs other types of wax. Soy wax also doesn’t hold color as well as some other types.

Paraffin Wax

This is a wax that is made from petroleum. It is the most widely used and cheapest wax for candle making, as it is readily available and easy to work with. Paraffin wax has a high melt point, which makes it suitable for creating candles with different shapes and sizes. It also has a strong cold and hot scent throw, meaning candles made using this wax will generally smell the strongest vs any other wax. Paraffin, due to its ease of use and favorable properties, is often blended with other types of wax to stabilize them and make them more suitable for use in candles. However, paraffin wax also has some disadvantages, such as being non-renewable and non-biodegradable, and the controversy surrounding whether or not it produces any harmful emissions into your environment, although in reality, studies have shown virtually identical emissions between paraffin and other “more natural” candles. It is also important to mention that being non-biodegradable does not necessarily imply harmful to the environment in the same way that plastic might be. Highly processed paraffin wax (such as is often used in candles) can actually be food-grade and is used in food products at your local grocery store.

Coconut Wax

This is a natural wax that is made from coconut oil. It is a relatively new and innovative wax for candle making, as it offers many benefits over other waxes. It has a creamy and glossy appearance, and can hold a lot of fragrance oil. Coconut wax burns cleanly and slowly, creating a long-lasting and high-quality candle. However, coconut wax also has some challenges, such as being more expensive and harder to find than other waxes, having a higher viscosity (which can make it difficult to pour and wick), and requiring a specific type of wick (such as wooden or cotton wicks) to ensure a proper burn. The ability for a strong scent throw, combined with the natural origin of coconut wax, is why we incorporate it into our products at Salient Scents.

Beeswax

This is a natural wax that is produced by honey bees. It is one of the oldest and most traditional waxes for candle making, as it has been used for centuries. Beeswax usually has a golden and rich color, which can make it difficult to dye, however, versions exist that have been altered to be white and do not have this issue. Beeswax has a subtle and sweet honey scent. It is also hypoallergenic and antibacterial, which makes it ideal for people with allergies or sensitivities. Beeswax burns slowly and brightly, creating a warm and cozy ambiance. However, beeswax also has some limitations, such as being more expensive and harder to source than other waxes, having a low scent throw (which means that it does not emit a lot of fragrance when burned), and being incompatible with some fragrance oils (which can cause the wax to crack or separate).

Common Blends of Wax for Candle Making

In addition to using a single type of wax, some candle makers also like to blend different types of wax together to create a unique and customized product. Some of the common blends of wax for candle making are:

Soy and paraffin blend

This is a blend of soy wax and paraffin wax, usually in a ratio of 50:50 or 60:40. This blend combines the best of both worlds, as it offers the natural and eco-friendly benefits of soy wax, and the strong and versatile performance of paraffin wax. This blend can create candles with a smooth and creamy texture, a high scent throw, and a long burn time. However, this blend can also inherit some of the drawbacks of both waxes, such as being prone to frosting and requiring a longer curing time.

Coconut and soy blend

This is a blend of coconut wax and soy wax, usually in a ratio of 70:30 or 80:20. This blend is one of the most popular and premium blends for candle making, as it offers the high-quality and luxurious features of coconut wax, and the natural and renewable advantages of soy wax. This blend can create candles with a glossy and smooth texture, a high scent throw, and a clean and slow burn. However, this blend can also be more expensive and harder to find than other blends, and require a specific type of wick to ensure a proper burn.

Beeswax and coconut blend

This is a blend of beeswax and coconut wax, usually in a ratio of 30:70 or 40:60. This blend is a great option for those who want to create a natural and organic candle, as it combines the benefits of beeswax and coconut wax. This blend can create candles with a rich and golden color, a subtle and sweet scent, and a bright and long-lasting burn. However, this blend can also be more costly and harder to source than other blends, and have a low scent throw and a high viscosity.

How to Choose the Best Wax for Your Candles

As you can see, there are many factors to consider when choosing the best wax for your candles, such as the type, the blend, the performance, the appearance, the quality, and the cost. Ultimately, the best wax for your candles depends on your personal preference, your budget, your target market, and your desired outcome. Here are some tips to help you choose the best wax for your candles:

Determine your goal

What is the purpose of your candle? Is it to create a relaxing and cozy atmosphere, to fill your space with a delightful aroma, to decorate your home with a beautiful and unique product, or to sell your candles to a specific niche or audience? Knowing your goal can help you narrow down your options and focus on the most important aspects of your candle.

Do your research

Before you buy any wax, make sure you do your research and learn as much as you can about the different types and blends of wax, their pros and cons, their compatibility with other ingredients, and their best practices. You can also read reviews, watch tutorials, join forums, and ask questions to other candle makers who have experience with the wax that you are interested in. Doing your research can help you avoid mistakes, save money, and achieve better results.

Experiment and test

Once you have chosen your wax, the next step is to experiment and test it with different combinations of fragrance oils, colors, wicks, jars, and other additives. You can also try different ratios, temperatures, pouring methods, and curing times to see how they affect your candle. Experimenting and testing can help you find the optimal formula for your candle, and also discover new and creative possibilities.

Why You Should Try Coconut-Blended Candles from Salient Scents

If you are looking for a high-quality and luxurious candle that can offer you the best of both worlds, you should try coconut-blend candles from Salient Scents. Our candles are handcrafted with a blend of coconut wax and paraffin, which gives them a glossy and smooth texture, a high scent throw, and a clean and slow burn. Our candles are also infused with premium fragrance oils that are carefully selected and blended to create unique and captivating scents. Whether you want to treat yourself or someone else, Salient Scents has a candle for every occasion and mood. Salient Scents is more than just a candle company, it is a lifestyle brand that aims to inspire and delight you with each and every unique candle. Give us a try and experience the difference for yourself.

Visit our website salientscents.com

Find out how our candles trap and eliminate foul odors

#candle #candles #aroma #scent #relaxation #wax #candle wax #paraffin #soy wax candles #coconut #beeswax

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