#which i doubt is used in place *izzy* nearly as often as it is in place of *oluwande* in fics where they are both just around

[ladyluscinia]

I really cannot make it clear enough that the only people who think Izzy Hands has a massively outsized following in the OFMD fandom are people who aren't paying attention and probably get annoyed by every positive mention of Izzy Hands.

Those of us who do post about him / read fics about him / enthusiastically ship him / whatever are far more likely to quip about how there are whole dozens of us in our corner because that's a hell of lot closer to the reality. But if plain statistics on fics or repeatedly pointing out that tumblr notes are the same people hitting that same reasonable average of double digit reblogs... Idk. Maybe a more descriptive exercise would make this clear?

I'm sorting AO3 by most kudos, looking at OFMD fics with Izzy's character tag (aka the one place he really outstrips the other side characters in numbers). A few observations:

Izzy's name appears in a fic summary for the first time on Fic 6, with "...and Izzy getting disrespected several times." Not much of a mention.

First Izzy/OC ship is Fic 7 (Hell or High Water - a title I recognize but have never read)

First Izzy/Other Character is Fic 17, with Izzy/Lucius, which also appears to be the first Izzy focused fic

Fic 22 is the first appearance of BlackHands as part of a SteddyHands fic

46 Fics in we get the first one Not Technically Ship Tagged with BlackBonnet (a Lucius/Izzy with a "background blackbonnet" tag), and at Fic 63 we get the first Actually Not Ship Tagged with BlackBonnet (a Stizzy fic about bonding over hating Calico Jack).

I think Fic 215 is the first mention of Sam Bellamy? I'm trying to find something specific and it's taking a while...

Oh wait there it is! 216 Fics by Kudos into the "Israel Hands" character tag (out of 7785 total) we have the first BlackHands fic that doesn't have Stede involved. Prior to this there were a lot of BlackBonnet fics, and notable numbers of SteddyHands and Izzy/Lucius. Hell we even hit Izzy/Frenchie and Izzy/Captain Flint before getting to this point.

I'm just really trying to illustrate here that for all the snide accusations and defensive worrying I see about all the sinister Izzy fans trying to make the whole show and fandom about him, "Izzy" content (which this ought to demonstrate is hardly all about Izzy) is just not that overwhelming. Izzy content that excludes or ignores the Revenge crew even less so. Like, run this exercise with any side character and you'll get pretty similar results - seeing as the dominance of BlackBonnet above all else is still ridiculous by fandom standards - but that's kinda the point.

Izzy is a popular side character, which is a thing that tends to happen when side characters get speaking time, characterization, camera focus, exploration of their current and potential relationships (conflict counts), etc. You know, things that Izzy gets a bunch of as an antagonist? Izzy having more content than Oluwande is not really more weird than Oluwande having more content than Buttons or Wee John? I'm not going to pretend that fandom spaces don't drop the ball on content for characters of color pretty often, but the tagged content breakdown in this fandom is not far off from what you would expect by character descriptions alone.

Like the list goes Cool Protagonist / Love Interest -> POV Protagonist -> Live-In Primary Antagonist -> Side Fun Guy with a Death Cliffhanger / Fanfic Gap Ending -> Side Pirate Assassin with a Subplot -> Assassin's Side Love Interest... I mean, maybe Lucius is a bit higher than Jim even for what "Lucius in the walls" fics can account for, or Lucius / Izzy have a bit bigger of a lead than they would without white identifying bias, but that's like? Unprovable speculation at best???

Not remotely comparable to, like, "Star Wars Sequel Trilogy" where Kylo Ren is 46.3% of fics while the two non-white protagonists are only in 35.7% (Poe) or 29% (Finn). Like Poe is technically behind Hux's 35.9%, which is absurd for a secondary antagonist no matter how fun I found his blatant evil. It's like if Chauncey Badminton was neck and neck with Jim or even Edward. That is a content percentage you should question, and the numbers might be worse in "Star Wars - All Media Types" (though Kylo does at least lose to Obi Wan).

#our flag means death #izzy hands ofmd #statistics are good and fun #and before someone comes in with a hot take about how izzy and darth wannabe's tag percentages are so close #izzy is hitting his upper 40s in comparison to edward's *78.6 percent* of fics - leaving him firmly in the side character range #while top character rey is only in 53.3 percent meaning that a 46 for kylo is 'clearly a fandom favorite' levels #context matters. fandoms tag differently. ofmd has a very limited cast who all live together #also ofmd has a fairly popular 'crew of the revenge' character tag - like 1600 fics #which i doubt is used in place *izzy* nearly as often as it is in place of *oluwande* in fics where they are both just around #ladyluscinia

[pukner]

Baz | part two

a steddyhands twt thread turned oneshot

|| Rated Gen || Stede and Ed take a brief vacation to visit Stede's family, and find a surprise.

part one / part two

It's a small shack, nearly a cottage, nestled neatly by the edge of the jungle, where few wander. The path is clearly only walked by a few.

It's-- nice. Like a dream someone else might've had. It's certainly never occurred to Ed to dream of a place like this for himself-- small and unassuming, nothing particularly fine or exciting or remarkable about it.

There's a girl, with a riot of blond hair pulled back into a ponytail, going through various fighting drills in the garden. Dressed practically, sturdy boots and worn trousers. Her movements are as familiar to Ed as his own. Which makes sense, considering who taught Ed the finer points of using a sword.

There's a boy sitting by the porch, and next to him is a man, cane propped up next to him.

He looks good, is the thing. Less strain around the eyes. Older, thinner, less muscle tone. But there's something softer around his mouth. Something gentle about his eyes. He looks up at the exact moment the girl does.

His eyebrows fly up. Ed doesn't know what his face is doing.

"Dad!" say the kids as one, looking moderately pleased.

"Childr--wait, Izzy?" yells Stede, flabbergasted. Which is fair.

"Jesus Christ," says Iz, looking resigned, "Fucking Mary."

"You cursed again!" says Louis, delighted.

"And I won't stop," says Iz, flatly. Then, quietly, "Ed."

"Iz," says Ed.

"Did you know," Stede hisses, rounding on Ed.

"I figured it out the second she said he was a terrible gossip," Ed says, pitching his voice so it would carry.

Izzy's face loses that strange, sad cast and scowls, "I've never gossiped a day in my life, Edward Teach."

"But you do?" says Louis, innocently.

Yeah, like, all the time," says Alma, "with Miss Evelyn and mum, you guys get drunk and--"

"Alright," says Izzy, in the same tone as when the crew gets too uppity, "Why don't we head inside for some fucking drinks. Jesus."

He leans heavy on his cane as he walks. Ed watches him, wonders what human flesh tastes like. Stede looks at him, can clearly read the thought on his face, and pulls him along. The kids are told to stay outside. Grown-up talks, says Iz, and he sounds like a dad. It's hilarious.

It must be said, Ed's extremely fucking confused. He's never seen Iz like this; all unbuttoned and relaxed. No sword at his hip.

He pulls out a bottle of whiskey.

"It's barely noon," says Stede.

"I'm not having this conversation sober."

"You wanna talk?" says Ed, hopefully.

Iz levels him with an expression of supreme judgment. Ed's really missed his bitchy little face. He also realizes that Stede has a very similar bitchy little face. Is his type just bitchy little men? Is this why he broke up with Jack?

They end up at the table, day drinking.

"I'm not going back," Izzy says, firmly. He seems like a different man. Ed thinks his heart might be breaking. Some horrid, cruel part of him hates Izzy for getting better without him there.

Then, abruptly, he realizes that this is the exact same horrid feeling Iz had about Stede. Silence, again.

"The children seem to like you," Stede says, apropos of nothing.

"They're good kids. That Alma's going to be terrifying one day."

"I don't doubt it," says Stede, "I've heard good things about your beets, by the way."

Iz looks at Ed, baffled. Ed shrugs. Maybe Stede just really likes beets.

"We've been thinking about visiting the children more often," Stede goes on, in that weird airy tone of his, "More shore leaves."

"...we have?" says Ed.

"Yes, Edward," says Stede, pointedly. Ed doesn't give a rat's ass about the children. He nods anyway.

"...good for you?" says Iz, confused, "I don't care?"

Stede nudges Ed. Ed nudges him back. Stede stares at him.

Wait, oh. "Can we visit?" asks Ed.

"Why would you want to?" asks Iz, "You fucking hate being on land."

"I'd do it for you," Ed says.

Izzy blinks, startled. That hurts. He deserves it, though.

"Because you love me," he says, slowly.

"And I've unfortunately grown somewhat fond of you," Stede adds, in the manner of someone delivering some very bad news.

"What," says Izzy.

"My fault," says Ed.

"I don't feel murderous rage when I look at you anymore," Izzy informs Stede, "That's all you're getting."

"I'll take it," says Stede, looking determined.

Ed knows that look. Doggedly determined, this one. Iz is about to be wooed. No idea what he's just signed up for, poor guy.

Nothing's been solved, of course. Ed still tastes blood in his mouth, Izzy's never going to walk the same again, Stede still has very little idea of how deep this whole thing goes. But it's a start.

Outside, the kids are laughing. Iz has eased up, doesn't look so small.

"So," says Ed, grinning all shit-eating. Because they haven't solved it, and he'll never be his First Mate again, but Ed has permission to try. Which is a big improvement from Past Tense Iz, "Tell me about your beets, Iz."

"Shut the fuck up, Ed," says Iz, but he's grinning back.

They'll be fine. Or, they'll eventually be fine. They'll get there.

And, actually, someone should do something about the Mary-Jackie alliance. Can't let that go unsupervised. Imagine the fucking havoc they'd wreak.

End

#my writing #my fic #steddyhands #omfd #steddyhands fic #our flag means death #omfd fic #edward teach #stede bonnet #izzy hands #bazfic #part two

[faejilly]

trust your heart

@shadowhunterbingo square: Double Date 

Relationships: Alec & Jace, background Malec, plus some Clary & Stabbing, because that’s my favorite. ;)

I am tagging this as a Shadowhunters 1x04 coda-fic because that's what this is in reaction to, but it occurs at some indeterminate later moment. We are ignoring the timeline. I have no idea when this happens, don't try to make it fit, it won't work. Probably because the timeline doesn't even work on it's own. 

This is also just an exercise in “jilly likes to play with the lore in the show because it doesn’t make any more sense than the timeline!”. (WTF is a Greater Demon y’all? WHAT DOES IT MEAN? How does some shadowy smoke compare to fallen angels and the mother of all demons? Who knows. Certainly the show doesn’t. SO LET’S GUESS. Or something like that.)

"Biscuit." Magnus paused, as if he wasn't entirely sure what he was saying next, and Clary tilted her head as she waited.

Jace figured she was as unused to seeing Magnus fighting for words as he was.

Alec had a hint of a frown between his brows, so apparently that wasn't a thing Magnus did very often in private, either.

Magnus sighed, and tried again. "If you wanted to give the retrieval of your memories another try, I have heard from the Spiral Labyrinth that Valak appears to have. Reformed."

"That was quick." Alec sounded almost blank, and Jace wondered if... no, that was stupid. Alec always still felt guilty about things, the only question was how guilty Alec still felt about the original failed summoning.

"He is one of the original Greater Demons." Jace shrugged as everyone looked at him. "I looked him up after last time. He's not a Fallen Angel, but he's still classified as a Demon Prince. There are only a couple of those."

A hint of pride broke through in Alec's voice. "And yet, Magnus managed to contain him."

"He almost killed Jace." Clary finally spoke up, her voice a little more subdued than usual.

"But he didn't break free," Jace pointed out.

Clary glared at him.

"What?" Jace spread his hands wide.

"You almost died."

Jace shrugged. "Doesn't make Magnus less impressive."

"Why thank you," Magnus gestured sideways and leaned forward in his chair in a way that very clearly implied a bow.

Jace snorted, and Alec's shell cracked a bit more, a hint of a smile as he looked at Magnus.

When Magnus was an arrogant bastard, Alec thought it was great. When Jace was an arrogant bastard, Alec always looked like he wanted to murder him. To be fair, Magnus never needed Alec to clean up the mess after he was an arrogant bastard?

Might cheer Alec up if he did.

But that wasn't Jace's business.

Jace leaned forward, aiming his next words at Clary. "Doesn't make you less impressive, either. You managed to disperse him, after all."

"She is naturally gifted when it comes to stabbing things." Alec's voice was dry, but his expression was fond. Jace could feel the tension in Alec's shoulders still, knew he wasn't nearly as nonchalant as he was appearing, but Alec wouldn't thank him for pointing it out.

Clary blinked. "Thank you?"

"You're welcome." Alec nodded graciously and entirely sincerely. Jace still didn't know how he did that, there was no way that should have managed not to sound either stupid or sarcastic. But no, he meant it as a compliment, and he was glad Clary knew it.

Jace shook his head a little. You're so weird.

Alec raised his eyebrows at Jace. You're one to talk.

Jace shrugged. Fair point.

"They're doing it again." Clary hissed, and when Jace shifted his attention back towards her, he saw she was leaning closer to Magnus. "Do you think it's a Lightwood thing, or a parabatai thing?"

"Both." Magnus leaned in as well, far enough he could clink his martini glass against her iced tea. "They do it with Isabelle too, but there's usually the occasional half-a-word thrown in with her."

Clary hummed in consideration before she nodded in agreement, and Jace had to resist the urge to stick his tongue out at her.

Alec snorted.

Magnus blew him a kiss.

Jace rolled his eyes at Clary. They're not any better!

Clary grinned at him. Neither are we.

And wasn't that a nice thought?

"There's no hurry," Magnus' voice was mostly serious again. "But do let me know. It will be the same ritual, but he may ask for a different price. He's all about shadows and secrets and treasures; he might be looking for something entirely different this time."

"Will it be worse because we." Clary swallowed. "Because I tried to kill him last time?"

"Probably not." Magnus shrugged. "He's not a particularly aggressive or grudge-holding demon, he really does just like knowing things, having bits and pieces of this world that no other demon can hold via his collection of memories. It's why I chose him to hold your memories in the first place."

"It's not like Valak would consider any of us a threat. We don't actually know how to kill him," Alec said. "Not so he'd stay dispersed for very long, much less actually dead. I doubt a short stint in the Void means much to a literal Shadow Demon. There's speculation he's part Void. Might have been a nice vacation for him."

Magnus snorted this time, but not in disagreement.

"Plus it's a very comprehensive summoning and containment spell." Jace grinned as Magnus lifted an eyebrow at him this time. "I told you I looked it up. That Medusa in the middle of the pentagram, it's a symbol of protection called a gorgoneion, and Valak's particularly vulnerable to it because of their shared dominion over serpents."

Magnus lifted his glass in another toast, this time aimed in Jace's direction. "Gold star for blondie."

"Thank you." Jace did not manage to avoid sounding slightly sarcastic, and he was not at all surprised when Alec kicked his ankle. He ignored that. "All of which just means that as summonings go, it's usually..."

He trailed off. He'd almost said mostly harmless, but then Alec was going to think about how their original attempt hadn't been, and how that was all his fault, and Jace had no idea how to comfort Clary that they really did usually know what they were doing without making Alec feel even worse about how obviously fucked up they'd been when they first met Clary.

Her mouth did an odd twist as she watched him stop talking, and he sighed. She'd clearly already figured all that out.

Not that it was hard.

"You should ask Simon." Alec's sentence ended more abruptly than usual, as if there'd been more he'd swallowed. "For the pentagram."

"And Luke." Jace managed to say without glaring at Alec for stealing his idea before he'd managed to say it first.

Clary frowned. "That makes seven. That's not a pentagram any more."

Alec blinked at her. Well obviously you wouldn't want me there.

Magnus and Clary just kept staring at him, and Jace had to swallow a snort of amusement. "Don't think you ducking out was obvious to anyone but you."

"I suppose it should have been," Magnus sighed. There was a golden glint in his eyes as he switched his attention to Jace. "But Alexander's over-developed guilt-complex doesn't explain why you're trying to duck out, too."

Alec's mouth opened, as if he was going to try and protest that his guilt-complex was at perfectly reasonable levels or something, but then his mouth closed and he turned to frown at Jace instead.

"He didn't want my memory last time?" Jace shrugged. He hoped that none of the despair he'd felt at that one-two punch of the demon deciding Jace didn't love anyone enough for his memories to count, of Alec being terrified of loving Jace, was making it through the bond. Or worse, onto his face for everyone to see. "Seems a bit of a risk to include me again."

Judging by how still Clary suddenly was, of the surge of nausea he felt from Alec, he'd failed entirely.

Fuck.

Alec leaned forward, but Magnus' hand on his arm stopped him before he said something that Jace probably wouldn't know how to deal with. Jace was used to feeling grateful for Magnus' existence for Alec's sake almost daily; it was a little weird being grateful for his own sake this time.

"The ritual was broken half-way through," Magnus said, his voice slow and careful, like you'd talk to a spooked horse. Jace kind of hated how nice it sounded. "Why do you think he didn't want your memory? He didn't get to me, either."

"He skipped me." Jace swallowed. Jace had been sure he'd see Alec's face when the demon got to him, too, but then Valak had just... jumped over him instead. Like everything Valentine had taught Jace when he was growing up was true, was right, that he couldn't know what love was, that he wouldn't ever be capable of it, that everything he thought he'd felt with the Lightwoods, with Alec, his brother, the other half of his soul, that all of it was just a lie he'd told himself, told himself so often he'd forgotten it was a lie.

But the demon could tell, could take one look at him and tell that all his cherished memories were wrong, weren't really love.

Then Alec had rejected the very thought that Jace could be the one he loved the most, as if Alec knew that too, knew they weren't really parabatai, not in any way that mattered, knew he couldn't trust Jace at his side, and sometimes Jace could tell himself that Alec was rejecting the implication of attraction, that it was more about Alec and his fears than Jace and his failures, and he told himself that Alec did love him, he did... but.

Sometimes all he could remember was that denial, and it didn't matter why.

No one had thought twice about Izzy loving Alec the most. No one would ever doubt that Alec was worth that, no one would ever panic at admitting that.

"Jace," Alec's voice was rougher than usual, and before Magnus or Jace could try and stop him again, he'd turned his chair and pulled Jace against him, his arms hard and implacable, and the fact that there was no way out was exactly what Jace needed.

He did manage to spare half a thought to being glad they were having dinner at Magnus' rather than in public before he just leaned in, his forehead pressed against Alec's shoulder, and he managed not to think about anything else at all. He could feel the hard beat of Alec's heart through the bond, the tight grip of Alec's hands an echo of tension even as his own body relaxed.

"Do you know what an ouroboros is?" Magnus' voice was overly precise and almost delicate; Jace wondered how long they'd been silent, how long he'd lost himself.

Jace nodded.

He felt Alec's head move above him, echoing the movement to make sure Magnus could see it.

"An ouroboros can be used to enhance a containment ritual; it won't actually make a pentagram last an infinite amount of time, but it does give it a kick."

Magnus paused, as if giving Jace time to process that.

"It's also a snake, so Valak's more vulnerable?" Clary asked.

"Mm-hmm." Magnus confirmed. "If Valak invokes that symbol by reinforcing the circle of a pentagram, any particularly talented or powerful warlock—"

"Like you?" Clary interrupted again, the smile clear in her voice.

Jace heard the clink of crystal and figured Magus had tapped her glass in agreement again. He felt himself smile, just a little, imagining the looks on both their faces, gently teasing and an exaggerated glint of false-modesty.

"A good warlock can force Valak to answer two requests for the price of one, so he will never follow a circle all the way around during a ritual. He jumps and swerves instead."

Oh.

Jace felt a hot flush of shame, it had nothing to do with me, but before he could move or say anything, Alec's arms tightened even further.

"It's also fair to say that 'love the most' is a crock of bull-shit." It was Alec this time, his voice remarkably steady, considering, and Jace could feel it in his chest as much as hear it. "Magnus and I talked about it, and there's no way for a demon to know that, love doesn't work like that, most and least or whatever. It's whoever you're thinking about right then during the ceremony, whatever your emotions are most caught up in at the time."

"It's usually a plausible answer," Magnus hummed softly in agreement. "Because it's suggested by the question, so you're thinking about whoever is important to you. But sometimes the question isn't enough to lead you that way, and he'll take a memory of whoever you're concerned about, or even angriest at, whatever's strongest and primary in your thoughts."

"So I saw my mom because I was worried and looking for her, not just because she was my mom." Jace could hear Clary shifting in her chair as she spoke.

"And Isabelle was probably still caught up in being delighted to witness me flirting atrociously with Alec," Magnus agreed. "Rather than him truly being more important to her than Jace or Max."

Alec's hand rubbed up and down Jace's spine, and his voice was both softer and lighter when he spoke again. "I have never regretted loving you, Jace, I just didn't know what most meant, or how I was supposed to survive admitting it in front of strangers."

"If Valak does ask for a memory of the 'one you love the most' again—" Magnus continued, soft and warm and gentle in a way that reminded Jace of how very old he was "—I will probably think of Alexander, but I might be reminded of Ragnor, because he died and I won't get any more new memories of him, and so each one I have is even more precious than they used to be."

Alec made a pained noise in the back of his throat, and Jace pushed himself free, wiping his eyes and shaking his head to settle himself.

And then he had to shake his head again, because Alec ruffled his hair and he could feel it didn't settle properly on its own.

Alec didn't reach out to wrap himself around Magnus up the way he had Jace, despite how clearly he wanted to, but he did reach out a hand and rest it gently on top of Magnus'.

Magnus blinked at Alec, and turned his wrist so their fingers could intertwine.

Jace coughed. "Sorry for ruining dinner."

"No such thing." Magnus waved the hand not still holding onto Alec in dismissal, somehow not spilling a drop of his drink. "But perhaps it is the sort of night that could use some extra dessert?"

Clary’s eyes brightened and she sat up a little straighter. "Chocolate dessert?"

"Your wish is my command."

#hmdiscord #shadowhunters #jace lightwood #alec lightwood #jilly writes #malec #my sh fic #clary fray #magnus bane

[symphonic--chaos]

18. “That was kind of hot.” For Malec!! 😘

“What do you mean, it got away?” The head of the group from the LA Institute snapped.

“I mean, it got away. Ran. Didn’t stay to have coffee. Generally what ‘it got away’ means.” A sigh accompanied the words as Magnus leaned back against the wall behind him, the entire situation wholly the other man’s fault.

“Look, could we just…" Alec sounded tired, irritated. His headache had grown exponentially larger the minute the group, all six of them, announced they were tagging along in the hunt for the du'sien demon. 

"Well maybe if your oh-so-great magic was any better, we wouldn’t have lost it. Some warlock you are, second-rate at best, I don’t even know why they allow you here, much less in Alicante.”

“SECOND RATE?!" Magnus snapped back as he pushed off the wall, his back straight, shoulders squared and chin up, a difference from the lax, carefree form he’d previously had. He’d been challenged the entire mission and he’d truly had it to the brim with the arrogant bastard in front of him. "SECOND RATE! PLEASE, TELL ME MORE HOW SECOND RATE I AM WHILE A MEMBER OF YOUR TEAM IS IN THE INFIRMARY RIGHT NOW, HER ARM COVERED IN SO MUCH ICHOR YOUR RUNES COULDN’T PROTECT HER! WHO’S SECOND RATE MAGIC IS PROTECTING IT FROM FALLING OFF WHILE THEY CLEAN HER?”

Things had come to a halt in the Institute as many of the Shadowhunters around them stopped what they were doing to look at the normally semi-quiet Magnus, towering over the LA head, red magic sparking around his fingers. The two were nearly chest to chest, both glowering at each other. 

“Alright, enough.” Alec warned as he pushed off of the table he’d been leaning on, forcing himself between the two as the LA head tried to intimidate Magnus with a step forward. “ENOUGH, Lucas.” He repeated to the man as his hand planted on his chest to move him back.

“No, I’m sick of you all protecting him. For what? A mediocre lay?” Lucas laughed into Alec’s face, which was no doubt his last mistake.

Alec’s fist collided with Lucas’s stomach before Magnus could catch his elbow, causing the man to double over in pain. Magnus had seen Alec activate his stamina rune while they were out, so he could imagine just how good that felt to Lucas. Three of the four in the group rushed forward to stand between them, a blonde female moving to help Lucas back and keep him away.

“Get out of my Institute, now.” Alec snarled, his finger pointed back at the door down the hall. 

“Your Institute? Last I checked, that was Isabelle.” Lucas scoffed as he straightened up with a wince.

“And in her absence, I’m here in her place. Now get the fuck out before I send you to Alicante for blatantly defying my orders earlier and causing us to not only lose our target, but cause injury to one of your team.”

Lucas’s eyes narrowed as he resisted the blonde pulling his arm to lead him away, but soon the others on the team had been spooked enough by the warning to help her in getting him to retreat. They headed in the direction of the infirmary, Lucas’s steps heavy as he muttered what Magnus could only imagine were swears and insults along the way.

“I need to do a report.” Alec grumbled, his temper still flaring as he watched the group walk away. A glance was given briefly to Magnus as he turned on his heel and went down the opposite hallway to the office Izzy had cleared out for when Alec visited and worked from the Institute.

Magnus stood there for a moment, watching him retreat, only to turn his attention to the others that were still watching. 

“I’m…sorry, for shouting.” He said as he lifted a hand to straighten his best, adjusting the shirt beneath it.

“No, you aren’t,” Underhill said with an amused grin on his face, his shoulder lifting in a shrug. “You didn’t say anything wrong, and someone had to put him in his place. He pisses us all off whenever he comes here. Big homophobe, big ego–”

“Tiny dick, I bet.” Another Shadowhunter chimed in and, despite his efforts, Magnus couldn’t stop the laugh that followed. 

–

“Magnus, I’m sorry if I undermined you by getting between you both.” Alec started as he stood from the desk, moving around to greet Magnus as he entered the office. He’d taken his jacket off and the tie hung loose around his neck, the first two buttons of his shirt undone in a feeble attempt to cool himself off after his anger made his temperature flare.

Magnus had taken time to reflect everything once he’d left Underhill and the others, gone to the infirmary to help them with the wounds that the Shadowhunter had received on the field and this… This was not what he expected to come back to. Cat eyes raked over Alec’s body, unashamed in his obvious ways as his fingers curled just the slightest and the lock to the office door clicked quietly.

'Oh,’ Magnus thought.

“No, that was…actually kind of hot.” Magnus said breathlessly as he stared at his husband and Alec was caught off guard by the faintest tint of pink that kissed Magnus’s tan skin. It wasn’t often he could make the normally unabashed warlock blush, and between everything earlier, their time alone to do a hunt together interrupted and the sudden protection he felt over Magnus added to the way he looked…

'Oh no,’ Alec thought.

It was less than a second before he had Magnus against the desk, his lips colliding with the warlock’s as his hands searched out the warm skin hidden away by three unnecessary layers. Button down, vest, coat, there- and Magnus’s hands were already at his shoulders, his neck, buried in his hair, curling and giving a slow but firm pull at the base of his skull, causing the Shadowhunter to groan into the kiss.

Oh yes.

#malec #sweet em #fic request fulfillment

[karaell]

How to save a heart

Alec was walking back from his meeting with Asmodeus on shaky legs. The adrenaline was wearing off and the reality of the situation was becoming clearer with every step.

He agreed to break up with Magnus, he agreed to an impossible deal and now he didn't know if he can go through with it.

Is he strong enough to put his own feelings aside and save his boyfriend, the love of his life from this suffering? A small part of his brain, the one which was usually right and which he often ignored was telling him that breaking Magnus' heart was the worst possible way out of this situation, that his boyfriend already lost too much because of Alec himself. But the part that was being consumed by guilt was quickly winning the battle. Because Alec felt guilt more than anything else. It was his fault that Magnus was without magic, his fault that he almost died, his fault that Magnus was sinking deeper and deeper into depression, because Alec was selfish and to cought up in his own wishes and desires to actually see his boyfriend see his pain and sacrifice.

That's over now. Gaining more steadiness in his step Alec makes a decision, he will sacrifice his heart, he will make sure that Magnus is happy again, that he feels like himself again. And despite the pain at the admission Alec is also sure Magnus will recover their relationship ending. He knows Magnus loves him, probably more than he loved his other lovers, he also knows that for the duration of their relationship Magnus had time to get used to the fact that he will lose Alec sooner or later, and if it's sooner but brings his magic back than who is Alec to argue with that logic.

****

He finds Magnus in the library, using one of the computers, his boyfriend for the time being looks haggard and bleak, words that no one would ever use to describe the great Magnus Bane, yet here they are. Alec waits for a beat, stopping in the doorway to drink in the sight of Magnus, of the most precious thing that ever happened to him, before bracing his heart for the impact. He clears his throat and slides on a mask of indifference. Magnus whippes his head around a tired and reserved smile on his face.

'Hello Alexander, I haven't seen you all day. I have news'

'Hello Magnus' he says, voice as steady as he can muster. 'What kind of news?'

Magnus tilt's his head to the side, studying his boyfriend for a second before continuing.

'I found an apartment, not far from here, so close enough for you to walk to work, hitting all of our criteria, I already went over whilst you where gone, as there was a chance to see it in person. And of course if you don't like it we can back out but I've placed an offer and we can start moving in even tomorrow!'

Magnus was mastering as much excitement as possible at this time, after his breakdown yesterday he felt enough shame at showing his weakness, but it was harder and harder to keep his walls up around Alexander who proved to be excellent at getting him to open up, almost against his will. But now gazing at his boyfriends stormy face he couldn't help but recoil, did he make a mistake and Alec wasn't willing to live with him anymore, did he push him away to far to the point of no return?

' That's great. I would say just in time, because you can't stay here any longer'

'Why? Has someone said anything?'

'Nothing like that, it's just.... Magnus I don't think us being together is right at the minute.... I think it's best if we don't see each other anymore.'

'What? I don't... Alexander what are you saying?' Magnus was lost for words, how come this man, who just 24 hours ago was cradling him in his arms whispering reassurance of love suddenly decided that he is not worth it?

Stumbling backwards Magnus kept an eye on Alec, on his stormy face and clenched fists, on his angry posture. Was this his doing? Has he been such a disappointing partner, it wouldn't be the first time, he thought bitterly.

'I think we should break up, without your magic, and with you being so... different. We just don't work anymore.' Alec was speaking through gritted teeth, each word that left his mouth was like a stabbing wound. All he was aching to do was to grab Magnus and never let him go. But that's not what Magnus deserves, he deserves his power, his magic, to live forever, not some pathetic excuse of a boyfriend who can't even bring him happiness.

Magnus was breathing hard, not fully comprehending the fact that after all of what happened in the last weeks he's now also loosing Alec, a reason for his sacrifice. He lost his magic to save his boyfriend from a tragic loss. He took that burden away from him and that's how this ends for him. Without a support he needs so desperately at this awful time. No one treats Magnus Bane this way, not even a person he loves.

Alec can see the exact moment Magnus is hit with the realisation of what is happening. He can see the walls going up, he can almost feel how betrayed Magnus feels. So he's bracing himself cause he knows how good his boyfriend is with words and how much he can hurt him.

'You, you made me believe that I can have love after so many centuries, you took away a part of me, you made me sacrifice myself time and again! You're a pathetic little boy who thinks he can play with people, you're no leader. I wish I never loved you, I wish I left you a long time ago when the chance presented itself! Goodbye Alec'

With that he was gone. Izzy found Alec on the floor of the library an hour later. Her brother in nearly catatonic state, clutching Lightwoods family ring.

****

Magnus was running, running away from that toxic place, form Alec, from this reality. He didn't know where he was going but when he finally looked up he was just a block away from Catarina's apartment. Apparently his brain still worked, in the contrary to his broken heart.

But before he could take another step, he felt a pull of power, some kind of electricity buzzing around him. Looking around he saw a twirling blue and red energy appearing right in front of him. Magnus had no time to react when the energy suddenly started entering his body.

Someone was slapping his cheek, it felt cold and strange against his face. He blinked his eyes open to see a young girl with a skateboard under her pit.

'Are you ok?' She asked.

Magnus blinked a few times after remembering the weird energy, he must've passed out after it entered his body. He was suddenly glad he somehow found himself near Catarina's apartment.

'Yes, yes I'm ok thank you. Must be low on sugar or something' with a quick wave he disappeared as fast as he could.

****

'Your magic is back! When? How did this happen?' were the first words that left Cat's mouth as soon as she opened her door.

'What?'

Can you not feel it?'

'I...' in all his distress Magnus didn't even question the way his body felt. He wasn't expecting his magic to return henceforth he hasn't tried to channel it in any way. But now he could feel it pulsing through him, like a roaring beast it was ready to be unleashed at any time, ready to be wielded. And it was his. It was familiar, felt like coming home after years of separation, it didn't not compare with Lorenzo's magic which did the trick but never felt like his own.

He got rid of his glamour and with glossy eyes looked at Cat, she stood before him tears streaming down her face.

How?' he asked.

'Wait, you don't know?' When did this happen?' she asked suspicion in her voice.

'Literally just now, I was coming to you, I had to leave the Institute, and suddenly this power entered me and bam here I am' he explained not being able to hide his hurt when talking about the Institute.

'What happened at the Institute?' Cat pressed gently, knowing the fragile state her friend has been in the last weeks.

'He, Alec... Alexander broke up with me'

'That's impossible! I know I had my doubts but that boy loves you, he was devastated when you got sick he wouldn't just toss you aside just a few days later'

'Well he did, he said we don't work anymore because I don't have my magic and I'm not myself anymore'

Cat was still looking at him sceptically, she got to know Alec a lot better recently and what Magnus was saying seemed very far away from the Shadowhunters character, but there were more pressing matters at hand.

'So what do you think happened? Asmodeus got bored and decided to just give you your magic back?'

'I doubt that, nothing comes free with my father, but how? I can think of only one way he would agree to giving my magic back to me and that's getting something in return. But I can't think of anyone that would willingly deal with my father... No person other than maybe you or Alexander......oh god.'

'Magnus what is it? Didn't you say he just broke up with you out of nowhere...ohhh'

They shared a look of understanding, a look full of dread.

'No he wouldn't. Why would he do that? Didn't he know I rather die with him than live for eternity without him.?'

'I guess he loves you enough to sacrifice his happiness'

'I told him I'm not happy, I told him there might never be a time when I'm happy again but I didn't tell him that he's the only reason I'm still here, still holding on. What if breaking up with me is not everything he had to offer to my father I have to see him now.'

'Go but don't do anything stupid. Asmodeus can still take your magic back.'

'I ..' he almost said he doesn't care but the words wouldn't leave his mouth because no matter what, Magnus is not being striped of his magic ever again. With the last nod towards Catarina he lets his magic wash over him, his hands start to dance in a manner that could be described as excessive but he doesn't care. He hasn't felt this alive in what feels like years. Soon enough he's walking through a portal straight into Alec's office.

****

He's not surprised to see it empty. If he wasn't trying to fix this mess he would probably be sitting on Cat's couch sobbing right now, so he understands. He spend the last week living in Alec's room at the Institute but nevertheless he decided to knock on the door, when he gets there. His heart nearly breaks at Alec's rough and sad voice coming from inside. 'Izzy please, leave me alone!'

The newly recharged Warlock hesitates only for a second before softly slipping into the room.

'I'm not going anywhere you silly silly Nephilim' he says quietly, but not without passion, it's almost like his voice send electricity towards Alec's body. Next second the Shadowhunter is up on his feet, hands wiping down his face of any fluids.

'Magnus what are you doing here? Haven't I made myself clear that I don't want to see you anymore?' he says and it would be much more convincing if Alec didn't look ready to be sick at having to repeat those words.

'What is clear to me, is that I have my magic back and that my boyfriend decided to make a deal with my father behind my back.'

Alec's eyes widen just for a second before he's moving, stepping closer to Magnus. Magnus who doesn't expect to be manhandled towards the door.

'I don't know what you're talking about. Please just leave I can't ..we can't'.'

'Yes we can, Alexander we will figure this out, please'

'Magnus no, he only agreed to this if we're not together anymore, he will take it back otherwise, you can't ...I just want you to be happy, please let me help you be happy'

'I am happy, when I wake next you, when I see your smile, when you speak sweet nothings into my ear, when I hold your hand, when I know that I have the love of my life by my side, that's when I'm happy.'

' But you said, that without your magic...I wanted you to be whole again, to fix my mistakes.'

'First of all it was my choice and second of all I said I wasn't happy, and that was true, my magic means the world to me but you darling you are my world. I can survive loosing my magic it would take time, but loosing you, the pain I was in was unimaginable. I love you Alexander Lightwood, and I'm not letting you go, even if it means I have to face my father again.'

'I love you too Magnus Bane and I'm so so sorry.'

And they cried softly together until they both felt like they are strong enough to face the world after this turmoil of emotions

#malec #Alec Lightwood #Magnus Bane #malec fic #Shadowhunters

[arrowsandwhiskeykissesmoved]

Always The Whirlwind Romance 3/?

ao3 

 malec. jace/magnus(not going into much detail with this ship). explicit (later chapters). trope galore. chapter 3/?

summary

“So a tattooist, huh?”

“Yep, it’s always a pleasure to see my work on someone else’s skin.” Dragging out the word with a playful smirk before taking a gulp of his drink, eyes filled with a mischief as he kept eye contact over the rim of the glass, causing Magnus’ stomach clench into knots.

Magnus was not prepared for this man.

so how long?

The night went on quite smoothly, drinks were flowing and laughter ensued. The travelling pair sharing stories of their journey. How they had met up and decided to stick together. Bonding over art from the historical to modern, both being involved in the arts, Clary with her pencils and paints, Alec with his needles and ink.

“It is as stereotypically wet as everyone says it is,” Clary pulled a face, “but nevertheless, still enjoyable. Very unpredictable weather, cloudy, sunny and then rainy all in one day.”

“But besides that you had fun?”

“It was amazing! I would love to go back. Imagine a group trip, that would be wonderful.”

“That would be dangerous.” Alec chimed in with a slight smirk, “You’re enough to handle on your own whilst drunk, I don’t even want to imagine what it would be like with Izzy also there, I don’t think the Brits would stand a chance.” Laughing as he tried to evade the hands that were currently trying to pummel him from his sister.

“Don’t be a dick.” Huffing, trying not to smile. Isabelle was thrilled to have her brother back, they’d always had a close relationship, they were always there for each other.

Sipping at his drink, Magnus smirked in amusement, observing the interactions of everybody. It warmed his heart to see a group of people so dedicated to each other. At some point in the night, he found himself sat between Alec and Clary with Jace sat opposite who was currently deep in conversation with Isabelle and Simon, laughing at something that seemed to make Simon blush.

“So how long?”

“Hm? How long what?”

“How long have you been together?”

Blinking momentarily, Magnus dragged his attention to the redhead beside him, mulling over the months in his head.

“I think I would say about six months? Maybe a bit over, I’m not sure. We don’t really keep track on it. It’s been wonderful though.” Smiling softly, head turned away from Alec causing him to miss the slight frown the pulled at Alec’s face. The taller trying to focus his gaze somewhere else than the back of Magnus’ head.

“Oh, that’s something.” Nudging him in the ribs with her elbow, a small smile on her face. “Yet I still had to hear it from Simon.”

“Well, you are attached at the hip for the most part and I haven’t heard from you in a while.”

“I’m sorry about that, things just got so hectic that I wasn’t able to keep up with everyone.” Clary sent Magnus an apologetic smile, leaning into his shoulder a little.

“No worries, Biscuit. It’s understandable but you’re back now and it probably means we’ll be seeing a lot more of each other.”

Letting a few beats of silence wash over them, Magnus drank his drink before moving his gaze over to his other side to the man sat there.

“So a tattooist, huh?”

“Yep, it’s always a pleasure to see my work on someone else’s skin.” Dragging out the word with a playful smirk before taking a gulp of his drink, eyes filled with a mischief as he kept eye contact over the rim of the glass, causing Magnus’ stomach clench into knots.

Magnus was not prepared for this man.

When he heard about the Alec Lightwood, he was expecting a reserved, not fuzzy yet warm hearted character. Not this hot as sin man, with a smile that can melt hearts and makes dirty innuendos that makes Magnus almost choke on his drink.

“Alec, that was terrible, you nearly made Magnus choke.” Clary chastised with a laugh.

“Oh believe me, Darling, I can handle a lot more before that happens.”

A collective groan happened yet Alec beamed.

And that smile did things to Magnus. What was he doing? Flirting with Jace’s brother. Well, Jace and everyone knew that Magnus was a big flirt in general with his personality, it was harmless but something didn’t sit right here. As the night went on, the flirting with Alec didn’t seem so light hearted and it worried Magnus. Worried Jace would pick up on it and get angry but he seemed completely oblivious that Magnus started to think he might have been overthinking things or at the very least, Jace trusted him.

He hoped it was the latter.

“So what are you planning to do now that you’re back in New York? Are you staying or is this just a visit?”

Letting out a thoughtful hum, Alec turned his gaze to look at Magnus, blue eyes capturing him in a way that he couldn’t look away.

“I believe I’m going to stay a while, I’ve missed the City and I can’t imagine being anywhere else right now.”

This made Magnus’ cheeks feel vaguely warm. He hadn’t ever had this reaction to someone before, not even when he and Jace started. He just hoped it would pass him by and he could forget about it, it wasn’t anything to worry about.

“And anyway, I’ve got a residency to start and it looks promising in the long term. A respectable place in Manhattan but a few tattoo shops in Brooklyn have expressed a desire for me to do guest spots, which I wouldn’t mind doing once I’ve got my feet on the ground.”

Alec had gained the attention of the table, everyone had quietened down to listen to him. He just seemed to have that presence that people wanted to pay attention to.

“That sounds exciting to say the least. I would love to see your work sometime.”

“I have photos I can show you but you’re welcome by to see my portfolios, you may see something you may even like yourself.”

A wink was sent Magnus’ way.

“Hell yeah, Bro! This means you can finally get started on what we had planned.”

Jace’s excited tone brought Magnus’ attention back to the group, head slightly hazy.

“Yeah, I spoke to the guys at the parlour and I can schedule you in as one of my main clients. You’re still wanting a back piece right?”

“Of course.” Confirming with a nod before moving to stand. “I’m getting more drinks, another round?” A slight cheer went up with a laugh here and there causing Jace to roll his eyes before making his way to the bar. Magnus followed him with his eyes before finishing the rest of his drink.

Alec had been fiddling with his phone for a few moments before nudging Magnus to gain back his attention, holding his phone so they could both see the screen. Magnus was captivated by the images he was seeing. It was no doubt that Alec had talent, he could see why he was in demand and he definitely wouldn’t mind seeing something like this on Jace’s body, he wasn’t opposed to something like this even on his own body. Not something he had ever really thought about before. That was an idea he would stick a pin in for another day.

The subject of conversation then made its way to Magnus’ job, Clary’s disbelief that he managed to get Simon, clumsy flailing Simon, into a pretty decent dancer.

“How did that even happen?”

“Well, you know that I love a challenge and that was one of the biggest challenges I’ve faced,” another indignant noise, “but he is quite good. You should come watch some time.”

“Okay guys, I know I’m not the most graceful of people but there is something about dancing that can just clicks.”

That caused Simon to receive some semi-serious replies because for all the ribbing that he gets, they’re still all friends. Still can be proud of what they all can accomplish.

It was then Jace arrived back with more drinks for everyone, tray being placed down in the middle of the table.

“Are we talking about how Simon doesn’t actually have two left feet?”

Smirking as he moved around Izzy to grip the other man’s shoulder with a friendly shake, avoiding the slap sent his way.

“Boys, boys, calm down. I swear you two are like children.” Izzy laughed as she tried to separate them, caught in the middle.

This was something Magnus enjoyed, watching how carefree Jace was, it made his heart clench before he turned his attention back to Alec, everyone falling into different conversations.

“So, a dancer, huh?”

“Indeed, and a pretty great one at that.”

“Well, I see you’re very modest.”

“Why should I play down my best talent that supports my living?”

The look the other man was giving him made Magnus squirm on the inside, it was deep and imploring. Something he was not used to, it was like Alec was taking him apart, trying to solve a puzzle that Magnus didn’t think he was.

“You are right and it’s refreshing. You should be proud of yourself from what I’ve heard from the other’s. Running a successful dance school along with your other projects. Don’t you have some music videos that you’re to take part in?”

“How do you know about those?”                                                                    

“I’m not the only person these guys seem to talk about so admiringly.”

This made Magnus glance up at his friends, the people he considered his family, feeling extremely lucky to have them by his side.

“And I had to do my own research about the wonder that is Magnus Bane and I must say, you are pretty impressive.”

Paying too much attention to the people around the table, falling onto Jace that the dancer missed the appreciative gaze that ran up and down his form.

It became a common occurrence now that the group would meet up at the bar. Often as a whole group but also frequently by whoever could show up. Magnus liked going to keep their friend Maia company as she worked. They were close, sibling like, he was as close to an older brother she never had.

He cared for them all deeply. It had been less than a year that the others had become so important to him, apart from Simon who he had known for some years with his dear Clary. He was the oldest of them all and he would protect them at all costs. They all had their pasts and Magnus would always provide them with the support they needed, the one they all would go to.

Now he had Clary back but he was now welcoming Alec into the fold and it was too easy. Letting this man in. It was easy and it scared him but he was Jace’s brother. And that was why it was easy.

At least that is what he told himself.  

“Hnnn…”

It was hot, it was burning, it was pleasure, it was rushed.

A quick fumble under the covers before collapsing down onto their backs. Magnus felt limp and sated, Jace breathing heavily beside him as they let the feeling gradually return to the bodies.

“Fuck, you know there should be a religion just dedicated to your mouth, it deserves worship.”

“I believe that goes against what religion is for.” Letting out a breathless chuckle, head tilting to look at his lover who replied with lazy flick of the hand.

“Technicalities. The point still stands. Your mouth is positively sinful.”

Magnus rolled his eyes before moving to sit up, picking up the silken robe that had been dropped to the floor, slipping it over his body as he stood, knotting it loosely in the front.

“Coffee?”

“Nah, I’m fine. I need to make my way out actually. I have to be at the gym in an hour for a client, so I only have time for a quick shower before heading out.”

Making his way around to Magnus, not caring about his nakedness, moving to place a lingering kiss to the other’s lips before making his way through the loft to the bathroom. Magnus couldn’t help but watch that ass as the blonde walked away, letting out a quiet sigh, grinning slightly.

“Damn.”

Sweat was building up on his skin as he moved. Arms moving fluidly to roll down the rest of his body. The music reverberated through his bones as he danced. Feet gliding over the floor as he took advantage of the space he had. Body turning with precision, a jerk here, a twist there, eyes concentrating on the mirror to ensure the movements were correct, stopping here and there to repeat a movement, clearly unhappy with what he had just done.

It was all about practice.

Move and repeat.

Repeat.

He could hear the class next door practising. He wasn’t the only instructor there, he wouldn’t be able to handle his own dancers, run the place and focus on his own career that branched out further than this. The school would always be his baby but he would always push himself further.

Pausing for a moment to gather his breath before restarting the routine as the music picked up again, the playlist he created pouring into the room from the sound system.

He pushed himself through a complicated manoeuvre eyes focused on the mirror in front of him before he stopped suddenly, eyes catching sight of someone leaning against the wall. Someone who happened to be Alec.

“Alexander?”

Moving over to pause the music, dropping them into silence.

“Alexander? Nobody has called me that in years.” A broad smile pulled at the taller’s lips as he pushed himself off the wall to stand straight.

“Sorry, I don’t know why I called you that, Alec.”

“No, no. I like it.”

Rolling his eyes, Magnus moved to wipe himself down with his nearby towel, he was desperately in need of a shower.

“What can I do for you? Did Jace send you?”

“… No, Jace didn’t send me.” There was something a little off about Alec’s voice, eyes drawn to Magnus’ arms before clearing his throat. “I just thought I would come and see you in action and Isabelle told me where to find you.”

“Oh … Okay. You know you shouldn’t really sneak up on someone like that.”

“Well, I’m pretty sure I announced my presence but you were too focused so I decided to let you continue and you are right, you’re great at what you do.”

Smirking at Magnus before stepping a bit closer.

“I was wondering if you wanted to go get something to eat, I asked the others if they wanted to join but they were busy.”

“Well I was going to see if your brother wanted to do something…”

“He didn’t tell you?” Alec frowned a little, Magnus decided that as attractive Alec was in his seriousness, he liked the smile better.

“Tell me what?”

“Him and Clary met up a bit ago and had gone for food with Izzy.”

…

“He did?”

Magnus felt uncomfortable as Alec nodded, he wondered why Jace hadn’t said anything.

“Okay then… Sure, why not. Let me go home and clean myself up and we can meet up wherever we’re going.”

“There’s a Thai place not too far away that is recommended, I’ll text you the address and I’ll see you there at seven.” Alec spoke as he walked backwards to the exit, eyes on Magnus.

“Yeah sure…”

Alec was about to disappear from sight.

“Wait, you don’t have my number!”

But Alec was gone and Magnus was confused before…

“Isabelle…”

#atwr #my writing #whiskeyarrows #malec is endgame #malec fanfic #malec #chapter fic

[mbtizone]

Kara Danvers (Supergirl): ESFJ

Dominant Extroverted Feeling [Fe]: All of Kara’s decisions are based on her feelings. She cares so much about everyone and all she wants to do is help. She’s warm, affirming, supportive, selfless, affectionate, and kind. Kara is sensitive to the feelings of others and takes care of other people emotionally. She is extremely encouraging and always knows how to make people feel better about themselves. Kara often lets her emotions control her, and she can become consumed by them. She always tries to see the good in other people. She is forgiving and willing to give second chances. Kara always goes above and beyond the call of duty, especially when it comes to helping her friends and family. Kara enjoys teamwork and she enjoys being part of a group that’s working towards a common goal. Although Kara engages in fights with villains on a regular basis, she doesn’t particularly like confrontation in her personal life, and although she favors harmonious environments, she can become very hot-tempered when she feels attacked, or when other people are being threatened. She’s very empathetic and good at relating to other people, even her adversaries. Kara needs validation and is very sensitive to other people’s opinions of her. She gets very upset when Supergirl is attacked in the media, often becoming defensive or filled with self-doubt. It’s difficult for Kara to take criticism, but she does want to improve herself and be the best possible version of herself. She likes to do things for other people, whether it’s something big, like saving them from a plane crash, or small, like flying all the way to Chicago just to get Alex some food from that truck she likes.

Auxiliary Introverted Sensing [Si]: Kara bases her judgments on her experience. When she’s presented with evidence contradicting her stance, she’s likely to dismiss it because of her own subjective history with someone or something. When everyone is trying to convince her that Lena Luthor is a member of Cadmus, Kara vehemently disagrees. She stands by Lena, because her experiences and history with Lena are what matters. When everyone else turns against Lena, Kara refuses to lose faith in her. She also initially refuses to accept that Jeremiah may not be the man she remembers (though she later comes around) and gets angry with Mon-El for even implying that something about him might be off. Kara enjoys traditions, like holidays and game night. Although Kara loves being Supergirl, her day job is very important to her. She likes her routine at CatCo and enjoys learning and growing within the company and she doesn’t mind performing the same repetitive tasks each day. She needs it to keep her grounded. Kara’s past is important to her and she likes to reflect on it, as well as use it to help her make decisions in the present.

Tertiary Extroverted Intuition [Ne]: Kara is an optimist and likes speculating about favorable outcomes. Though she enjoys her familiar routine, every now and then, Kara likes to step outside of her comfort zone. Ideas and possibilities are stimulating to her and she likes to try new things. The unknown doesn’t typically frighten her – it excites her. She wants to have new experiences and doesn’t allow herself to get hung up on what might go wrong.

Inferior Introverted Thinking [Ti]: It’s nearly impossible for Kara to put her emotions aside or be detached in any situation. Sometimes, when Kara is presented with facts and evidence she disagrees with, she has trouble making logical arguments. She just feels that she’s right and her opponents are wrong. Because Kara is so concerned with getting things done, she rarely stops to think critically about the predicaments she finds herself in. When Winn pinpoints Alex’s location after she’s been kidnapped, Kara wants to go and get her right then and there. Maggie tries to convince her to stop and think. Rick doesn’t look concerned. Maybe we should take a minute here, Kara. But nope, Kara’s already flying off with a rescue in mind. When she arrives, she finds that her sister isn’t there and the time that they have to find her has been cut down to four hours and Kara watches as Alex’s cage begins to fill with water. Kara doesn’t like when people try to make her (or Supergirl) out to be inadequate in any way. Sometimes, she can become quite stubborn if she feels that she knows the best solution to a problem, and can shut out other people’s opinions.

Enneagram: 2w1 So/Sx (Tritype: 216, possibly 217)

Quotes:

Alex: [cleaning James’ wounds] You’re lucky you didn’t take a direct hit. Kara: Very lucky. James: I had my shield. I love that shield. [Kara gives him a pointed look] James: And I know what I’m doing, Kara. Kara: Even if Metallo is weakening though, he’s still a fanatic follower of Lillian Luthor. We have to find out where he’s taking Lena and how to help her. James: What is it gonna take for you to realize that Lena is a criminal? She’s not the victim. She got the kryptonite. He broke her out of prison. Kara: Lena’s not a member of Cadmus! She’s not! She stopped the gang with alien weapons. She saved Alex’s life when Corben tried to kill her. James: She shot Corben and then her crazy mom turned Corben into Metallo, so that could’ve been the plan the entire time. J’onn J’onzz: We have to start treating Lena Luthor like a hostile. The evidence is too overwhelming. Kara: Winn? If you watch that video, I know you’ll find something. Winn: I did, it’s… it’s clean. Kara: Then find something to prove her innocent. J’onn J’onzz: Everything we’ve seen so far says the exact opposite. Kara: Well, she’s my friend and I believe in her. [leaves room] James: [follows Kara out the room] I’m your friend. Which is why I don’t understand why it’s so hard for you to believe me. People don’t remember this, Kara, but Clark and Lex Luthor used to be best friends. For years and Clark believed in Lex for the longest time, no matter what people said, no matter what kind of proof he saw with his own eyes. No, Lex was his friend. But Clark was wrong. Kara: Lena is not Lex. James: But they grew up in the same house, Kara. I don’t understand why you keep defending her. And you have so much faith in her, but none in me as Guardian. Kara: That’s entirely different. I am trying to protect you. James: I do not need your protection. I need your trust. You have mine. I don’t understand why it’s so hard for me to get yours.

Lena: [putting down Kara’s article about her] It’s a good article. You flatter me. Kara: I only wrote the truth. I’m learning to keep digging, even when all the evidence points one way. There’s always another side. Lena: Even when it’s hard to find. Kara: Especially when it’s hard to find. [pause] Kara: So my office is overflowing with flowers… Lena: Really? Kara: Yeah. [both smile] Kara: You didn’t have to do that. Lena: Yeah, I did. Supergirl told me that it was you who sent her. I don’t know how to thank you. Kara: Well, that’s what friends are for. Lena: Yeah, never had friends like you before. Come to think of it, I’ve never had family like you. No one’s ever stood up for me like that. Kara: Now you have someone who will stand up for you, always. Lena: Well, Supergirl may have saved me, but Kara Danvers, you are my hero.

Kara: I stopped by that food truck you like. Alex: The one in Chicago? You are my favorite person.

J’onn J’onzz: You know, I wouldn’t have minded you coming to work for the DEO full-time. Kara: I can’t leave this place. It’s not just a secret identity to me. I almost did something today that I would have regretted the rest of my life. J’onn J’onzz:: What stopped you? Kara: My friends. The DEO keeps you human. They do that for me.

Kara: Either of you have saved the world before? Barry: Mm-hmm. Oliver: Last year. Barry Allen: It sure beats screwing up the world. Kara: Hey, you are too hard on yourself. Oliver: That’s what people usually tell me. Kara: And for good reason, I’m sure. But, back on my Earth, it’s just me and my cousin. Between the two of us, we’re more powerful than… Barry Allen: Yeah, everybody in this room combined. Kara: No, no. That’s the point. That’s what you’ve all proven her. Meta-humans or not, superpowers or not, you are Earth’s mightiest heroes.

Kara: I know you said you don’t get unnerved. Oliver: Well… Kara: But if you did, I think hardship is what makes us stronger. That’s probably why these people look to you as their rock.

Snapper Carr: Teenage runaways are not news. They are clichés. You have more important stories to cover. Kara: More important? What’s more important than a mother finding her daughter? Snapper Carr: My coffee, my Danish, and the five minutes of peace and quiet you stole from me.

Kara: [seeing the inter-dimensional portal] Go back to the DEO. Tell Alex what happened. Make sure a strike team follows me. Mon-El: [as she changes, she tosses her civilian clothes to him] Right. Kara: I’m going in there. Mon-El: Uh… we don’t know what’s on the other side. Kara: Izzy’s on the other side. And that’s all that matters.

Snapper Carr: Slaver’s Moon? Very catchy. Kara: All those runaways? They were being sold as alien slave labor. That’s a big story. 8,000 words, personal accounts from the cells, from the auction house, from the daughter, Izzy, whose disappearance you didn’t want me looking into. Snapper Carr: You want a medal? Submit yourself for Pulitzer. Kara: I know that you want me to follow my head, but I would rather be wrong about a dozen leads than not follow the ones I believe in. That’s the kind of reporter I want to be. I’m always going to follow my heart.

Kara: James, part of being your own man is knowing when to ask for help.

Alex: You’ve been weird ever since I told you. Kara: I don’t mean to be. Alex: Kara, I know when you’re sad, or when you’re disappointed. I don’t know what I would do if you were disappointed in me. Kara: I would never be disappointed in you, but you said you didn’t want to talk about it anymore. Alex: Well, I do. If… if you’re not okay with it… Kara: I’m SO okay with it! Sit down. Alex, come and talk with me. [Alex sits] Kara: I think I owe you an apology. Alex: For what? Kara: For not creating an environment where you felt that you could talk about this with me. All those years we spent together growing up, the endless nights talking and sharing, now I realize that they were all about me and my secret. There’s never been room for you, and that’s my fault. And I’m so sorry. Alex: You didn’t do anything wrong. Kara: And I know… I know that this is not the same at all, but I do know how it feels to keep a part of yourself shut off, to keep it inside. And I know how lonely that can make you feel. But Alex, you are not alone. Alex: I can’t do this without you. Kara: You don’t have to. So what about Maggie? What’s she like? Alex: I… I just like her so much. You know, she’s smart and she’s tough and she’s just beautiful. She’s so beautiful. Kara: So are you.

James: [shows his signal watch] Kara, he gave me this a long time ago. If I ever got in trouble, I could contact him. Kara: But you weren’t in trouble. When did you even call him? The second I left? James: Kara, I made a promise to your cousin. If anything ever happened to you… Kara: My cousin doesn’t get a “get out of a jam card” when he first started. Neither should I.

Kara Danvers (Supergirl): ESFJ was originally published on MBTI Zone

#2w1 #Kara Danvers #So/Sx #Supergirl #ESFJ #Type 2 #mbti #mbti types #enneagram 2 #enneagram #enneatypes #enneagram type #mbti personality types #fictionalcharactermbti #fictionmbti #tv mbti

[lunaswondrousworld]

I'll probably regret posting this because I can already smell the potential wank on the horizon but it’s been sitting in my drafts for a while now and I've been thinking about this since last week's ep. (Plus ‘the discourse’ has been all over my dash anyway so I might as well add my two cents.)

So here’s basically just a long (really long) rant about what annoyed me about the writing in S2 so far, specifically regarding Alec.

A word of caution: some of the following might (who am I kidding, this is tumblr, it WILL be) regarded anti M@lec. I’m not actually discussing it as a ship, this isn’t what this post is about, but there are mentions of how M@lec on the show affects the writing / narrative for other characters (hence me doing whatever’s humanly possible to avoid this showing up in the tag, because that’s not where it’s supposed to end up). Also, all of this is my personal view on / interpretation of things, so when I talk about how “xy is like that” what I mean is, obviously, that I personally think / interpret xy like that. /end disclaimer

I've seen quite a few very opposing posts on my dash now regarding that entire Alec (& Jace) issue and who's having it worse and who's to blame etc (and also how M@lec somehow plays into all this). And I have to say I find myself both agreeing and disagreeing with several points made by all sides.

What I vehemently disagree with is the notion of Alec being egoistical / self-centered / making everything about himself / his own pain without acknowledging that Clary or Jace are actually affected / suffering much more than him (even though I have to admit that I cannot fault people for getting that impression, seeing as his characterisation this season is kind of all over the place. But I'll get into that later.)

Honestly, I think many people put in his situation would react pretty similarly to how he did. He's had his body hijacked by a demon and used to murder someone. He’s had to watch himself reach into another person’s chest and rip their heart out, with his very own hand. Just let that sink in for a moment.

And not just anyone (which already would have been bad enough), no, someone who was close to and meant a lot to people who are close to and mean a lot to him (let's just ignore the finer points of the Clary and Alec dynamics for now because while it may not be 100% accurate for him and Clary, it definitely is for him and Jace). He thinks he killed Jace's (& Clary’s) mother. So even if he might know, intellectually, that it wasn't his fault, that there’s nothing he could have done to stop this, and that yes, if you just look at the facts, it's most likely worse for Clary and Jace because they lost their mother… well, feelings and emotions are a different matter entirely. In my personal experience, people just don't react logically in situations like this. "Emotions are nothing but a distraction" may be a useful motto for a Shadowhunter, but at his core, Alec is only human after all. So, generally speaking, I don't think the way his reaction was portrayed in the last episode is entirely off. And I don’t expect him to just get over the pain and guilt (which is probably the driving force here, guilt can be completely crippling) he’s feeling for the sake of acknowledging that there’s people who have it worse than him (even if that’s true, objectively. If there even is such a thing as objectivity in a situation like this). This just isn’t how human beings work. Of course he could have reacted another way – I don’t think there is one “correct” way to react in a situation like this – and I wouldn’t go so far as to say that ‘everything made perfect sense and I wouldn’t change a thing’ but I can accept it as “sufficiently relatable” and live with it.

Which also goes for the scene at the beginning of the latest episode with him and Jace on the roof.

Now, admittedly, my initial reaction was "why the fuck would he run off and talk to Magnus when both Jace and Izzy are right there, that makes no sense whatsoever? He spent the first 3 episodes obsessing about getting Jace back home, he almost killed himself trying to find him, and now that he finally IS, and he tries to talk to Alec and be there for him, Alec just runs off? Without even once asking how Jace was doing after all this? WTF?". But after thinking about it for a while and after reading a number of different posts - both sharing my initial reaction AND the opposite view, aka team "no, look, it does make perfect sense because....", I can see both sides. This post pretty much sums it up. So yes, as far as I'm concerned, it does makes sense that he wouldn't really be able to talk to Jace about any of it. If it was only Clary's mother then yes, he would. But for all they know at this point, Jocelyn was Jace's mother too.

Doesn’t mean I wouldn’t have preferred to have him actually ask Jace how HE was doing after everything instead of being JUST all, for lack of a better description ‘woe is me’ (which, as I said, generally, emotionally, I can relate to) because Jace has been to hell and back, yet there he is, trying to comfort Alec (and everyone else). But again, I can also get behind the reasoning why Jace is not exactly the person he can talk to in this specific situation.

I'd personally think the logical alternative for him would be Izzy, but one could also argue (as other people have) that he might not want to burden Izzy with any of this since she's still hurt - and there’s that whole issue of Izzy trying to kill him while being possessed by the demon) - so I could sort of accept that, too.

Plus, narratively speaking, I do get that they need to have Alec actually interact with Magnus at some point if they're supposed to actually progress their relationship, so there's that. I do know where canon is heading as far as that is concerned. And since Alec's life is mostly at the institute and Magnus' isn't, they have to find ways to get them alone somewhere. All of that makes at least some sort of sense.

However (and here beginneth the "rant" part of the rant).

The main problem I have with Alec this season is not that he suddenly is an egoistical asshole who only cares about himself and doesn't give a shit about what anyone else might be going through (because the Alec that was established over the course of 13 episodes in season 1 really isn’t), but that the writing for his character in S2 is just kind of all over the place and really damn inconsistent (the starkest most obvious contrast being between episodes 1-3, and 4) and he's pretty much doing a complete 180 every other episode depending on where the narrative needs him to go.

Or, as a friend of mine called it (and the salty, bitter part of me can’t help but agree), where The M@lec needs him to go.

And the latter is more often than not the complete opposite of what would actually make sense in terms of consistent and true-to-character writing / behaviour, given the circumstances they’re all in at this point in canon / the stuff that happened in previous episodes (which most of the time was like 10 minutes ago, in-universe).

And that – and it actually pains me to say this because Alec is my favourite character on the show -  does occasionally result in him appearing to be, at least at times, an egoistical asshole who only cares about himself and doesn't give a shit about what anyone else might be going through (exaggerating quite a bit, but that is the general idea. Plus I have seen posts saying exactly that so people really do get this impression, I’m not making this up). I don’t hate the character for that, I totally blame the shitty inconsistent writing. And it’s pissing me off to no end.

Let's take a look at S2 so far, shall we:

For the first three episodes, Alec's entire motivation could roughly be summed up with "Jace Jace Jace Jace Jace Jace Jace Jace Jace Jace Jace Jace Jace JACE!!!!"​ He was pretty much unable to function normally because of Jace being gone. The guy was prepared to risk KILLING HIMSELF just to find Jace, and he very nearly did.

When they were finally reunited, they were literally sobbing in each others arms because they were finally, finally back together.

Then, after three episodes of this, after what canonically can’t have been more than a few hours, maybe a day at most, literally from one Alec scene to the next, episode 4 Alec is suddenly all "Who? Oh, Jace? Oh he's fine, no worries, LOLZ. I haven’t actually bothered to try and talk to him or check on him to see how he’s doing but I’m sure he’s fine. Let's talk about that date instead 'k? How about we go now?"

Now move onwards to the beginning of episode 5, where we're once again sort of back to ep 1-3 Alec. Who is completely guilt-ridden and angsting over not having been able to save Jace from Valentine (which does make sense, and ties in nicely with the Alec we saw in eps 1-3. Episode 4 Alec - not so much.) and about not having been able to help Jace while he was in the City of Bones (which he tried exactly when???, I can’t help but ask myself, because it didn’t exactly happen on the version of the show that I saw). Well, that and the whole murdering-Jocelyn-due-to-demon-possession, but I already covered that part.

Most of the times we see Alec in that episode, we see him feeling guilty and awful, at the end of the episode he's actually crying (Alec "emotions are nothing but a distraction" Lightwood. Crying. In public. In front of an entire institute full of other Shadowhunters) at the funeral of a woman he didn't even like to begin with.

And then, the following episode (now at this point this is only judging from spoilers and previews but I highly doubt they'd be THAT misleading) it's LOLZ!Alec from the beginning of episode 4 again, having happy datey times with drinks and smiles and just generally having a swell time. While everyone else is most likely still suffering, cause, you know, Clary & (for all we know at this point) Jace's mom is still dead - which Alec has apparently gotten over in record time because yay, date! Can’t ruin that by him angsting over stuff can we - and the Shadowworld in general is still going to hell. But yeah, that date needs to happen. Because reasons.

Now I don't know about you but as far as I'm concerned, this is not what consistent characterisation or writing looks like.

Once again, that date talk in episode 4 is happening pretty much right after the end of Parabatai Lost, give or take a few hours. Where Alec’s Parabatai (best friend, brother, the person he literally – and I mean literally, as in, the character actually said those exact words in canon - cannot live without, whatever the show chooses to call their relationship nowadays) who is so so important to him (or so episodes 1-3 have been telling us), who was pretty damn beat up the last time he saw him, was arrested by the Clave and thrown into (as another post so accurately put it) pretty much the Shadowhunters equivalent of Azkaban, all of that after having spent I don't-actually-know-how-long being back in the hands of his abusive father who tortured him both physically and mentally (which Alec must have at least SOME idea of, he grew up with Jace, he must know what his childhood life with Michael Wayland had been like before he came to live with the Lightwoods).

In any even remotely realistic scenario to follow the end of episode 3, Alec - the Alec that has been established all throughout Season 1 and in episodes 1-3 of Season 2 - would have crawled naked over broken glass to the City of Bones to see Jace if that was the only way to do it. At least he would have TRIED. At the very least, he’d just generally would have given a shit about how Jace might be doing instead of just dismissing him altogether and thinking about going on a date right that very moment.

And this isn’t even a Jace specific thing (even though that makes it worse because the’re parabatai, they’re supposed to be having this bond closer than any other human bond - the show’s words - and having each other’s backs), it would be the same if it had been Izzy who’d been locked up in the City of Bones, facing a lifetime of imprisonment or whatever other fucked up thing the Clave might come up with. Alec grew up in this world, he knows what the Clave is capable of. Going on a date and just dismissing the severity of the situation Jace was actually in like that isn’t just a stretch, it’s completely OOC for the Alec we’d know up until that point.

But since the narrative called for a cute!M@lec!moment, Jace (and all that happened in the previous three episodes) was conveniently dismissed, everyone BUT Alec (you know, the guy who – in the previous episode – almost literally killed himself to find Jace. Just in case anyone else forgot like the episode 4 writers obviously did) asked / worried about / went to see Jace. So Alec could focus on the stuff that’s really important, like going on a date. LOLZ.

And yes, I’ve seen posts after “Day of Wrath” aired that tried to explain how Alec not worrying made sense because he firmly believed in Jace’s innocence and he was really convinced it was just a matter of Jace touching the soul sword for two seconds and then he’d be released and back at the institute. And that’s nice and all and yes that could be it, but honestly, the way that scene actually happened, it was pretty obvious where the show’s priorities and focus lay in that moment. And if I have to bend over backwards and hop around in a circle with my hands tied behind my back just to try and find an explanation that somehow MIGHT explain why that scene being the way it was did make sense after all... well then that’s just not very good writing.

Granted, the fact that I don’t ship nor particularly care about M@lec in a shippy context (any of the shippy aspects as far as actual show canon is concerned tbh, I think the show in general would greatly benefit from pretty much ditching most of the shippy stuff and just focusing on the greater plot instead. I am aware that’s not gonna happen on a show geared mostly towards a teen and early twen audience but a girl can dream right?) does at least play some part in how I judge Alec’s arc in S2 so far. I’m only human after all.

But at the end of the day, I just really hate inconsistent writing where characters are just bent and twisted and pushed around in whichever direction the narrative needs them to go even if it just. Doesn’t. Make. Any. Sense. Especially when it concerns my favourite character. And as I said, I do get that in order to move M@lec forward, there has to be actual M@lec interaction which means the show does have to find ways to have them interact and get closer. But please for the love of god, at least try to keep the characters consistent in the process?

#* #*text #me rambling away #let's see how many followers I lose over this #but I know that if I don't post it I'll never be able to let it go #so there #shadowhunters #sh meta #ish #alec lightwood #sh2 #bad canon is bad

[surelypovichjr]

Surely Waxes Brazilian Part III: Chip and Surely’s Legitimate Beef

This is part three in a four part series documenting my recent adventures in Brazil. Helluva time! Catch up with Part I and Part II before reading this sweet juicy peach! Zei Gezunt! 

Is this Arby’s located in Brazil or is it simply Rockville Pike? The correct answer gets a free curly fry on the tab of Yers Surely.

Part III: Chip and Surely’s Legitimate Beef

It was an unbearably humid morning just like the rest of them—February in Rio. The days had been like this for awhile now…business was good, but still, pushing Isabel’s cart up the steep, winding roads of the Morro da Babilônia favela, I could sense that something was off. I continue pushing the cart, up to where Isabel is standing at the top of a hilly mound; quickly, I brushed aside my ominous feelings, and stop to admire the curvaceous silhouette Isabel is cutting on a makeshift shack with peeling yellow paint. A small tidepool of sweat crept down the beautiful boob job I had gotten her just the other week as the Brazilian morning grew increasingly swampy.

Isabel was worth all the salt in the shaker! Living here her entire twenty-six years made Isabel not only street-wise but also endearing to everyone she greeted; a friend and trustworthy woman to the whole neighborhood, a brand of community cache no amount of money could buy. Chip’s business proposition that night had prompted Izzy to quit her library job and instead work for us…naturally, she still maintained her night shift at the City of Goddess, but at this point, it was just for some extra pocket change.

A weaker man might have wanted Isabel to quit that life but I prided myself on being a more enlightened individual. As my old friend Jeffrey Gildenhorn (RIP) once said, being a sex worker is a job just like any other. Reading up on the subject, I learned that workers like Isabel are far too often marginalized because of the broken way that our governments attempt to scandalize the occupation for political points with pearl-clutching constituents. Truly, if this world had any guts whatsoever, it’d realize that incorporating prostitution into the legal workforce would only increase communication between those in the industry and the people trying to stop slave-trafficking and other forms of heinous activity that ladies like Isabel sometimes run up against in their line of work. As Jeff said, cash for sex ain’t nuthin’ to sneeze at, unless, you know, that’s what gets yer dick off…and for me, it actually does, which is a pretty cool fetish, in my opinion. No judgment and no sneezeguards, is what I always say!

Jeffrey Gildenhorn was a Renaissance man ahead of his time in that the man both owned a diner AND ALSO advocated for the decriminalization and ultimate legalization of the sex worker industry in DC...in the early 1990s! A true visionary! RIP, my good friend.

Isabel was also now a sales associate for our latest business enterprise, Chip and Surely’s Legitimate “Beef”, a 501(c)(3) providing door-to-door food delivery services to the city’s minimally regulated outer boroughs. The whole shebang was paid for by the suckers at the UN in partnership with the International Olympic Committee, who were of the mind that feeding the country’s most at-risk citizens would be good for Rio’s image as the events approached.

Izzy was a great fit at CSLB; her wonderful customer relationships made her a natural pick to grace all of our company’s billboards and television commercials. Of course, I had hired my old photographer Trevor for these gigs. The guy had decided to stick it out in Brazil, and was doing good after a few recommendations with some of our business partners—and because of all the referrals, we didn’t have to pay him! As for Isabel, it cannot be overstated how good she was. Out of the 1,264 slums in and around the Rio de Janeiro, Isabel was Chip Rosenbaum’s top earner and the two of us became inseparable as we worked her old stomping grounds together, hand-in-hand. Still, she had her doubts.

“I don’t know what it is about this job,” said Isabel, having just made $25 selling a bag of grade D meat to a family of four, “but I feel like there’s something else I could be doing with my life. Surely, do you think I should go back to my job at the library? I know it’s less money, but it felt like I was making a difference.”

Isabel’s old job. Total snoozer.

For a moment I mulled this around in my head. The whole point of getting Izzy involved was to get her out of the library and onto the streets. There was more money to be made out here slinging hot beef than it was curled up inside the Biblioteca Nacional, collecting a steady, but below-average paycheck. A few more years of the illicit meat racket and the two of us could retire somewhere special, maybe even make it back to Rockville someday—of course, this would be after the statute of limitations on Ping’s child support runs out. On that day, I could see it all so clear. Me and Isabel, back in my North Bethesda duplex. I’d fit it up real nice with some quartz countertops and a tanning bed. We wouldn’t miss a beat. We’d be happy. Maybe raise a couple of children—maybe they’re even our children and not some random kids we see walking around Bethesda Row on Simchat Torah. Was it really so crazy?  

The Bethesda Bagels where I am no longer welcome. I still frequent the Dupont location.

“I dunno, Izzy,” I said, rolling a bucket of rancid tripe up an unpaved embankment. “I think Chip’s doing right by us. We’re making money. Way more than you were dewey decimalin’…more than I ever did selling ‘ticles to this place and that. Why change things? Besides, we’re in love, aren’t we?”

“Of course we are, Surely. I don’t know what I was thinking. I love you.”

“I love you too,” giving her a peck on the cheek.

“Come on Surely, this meat isn’t going to sell itself,” said Isabel, knocking on the next door. A woman opened up and Isabel started in with the usual spiel.

“Would you care for…some tripe?” I asked, not waiting for the answer before unloading some samples on her sweet lil kiddos.

While I was eating at Arby’s my pal Chip had been buying ‘em up left and right. Chip’s dad Leo had died and left him with the family fortune. Turns out, the old man was the silent partner behind J.Chow’s Chicken, Salad, and Ribs in the White Flint Mall food court, arguably the best restaurant in the entire shopping center, besides the Cheesecake Factory, of course.

The J.Chow’s establishment at White Flint Mall. RIP.

For twenty years, Chip was doing well as the franchise owner of 64% of the Arby’s Restaurants in the lower 48, that is until Michelle Obama’s Let’s Move campaign got underway. This initiative had an almost instant and deleterious effect on the fast food business, especially Arby’s which had at that time not yet launched its market sandwich line of healthier meal choices, such as the Carved Turkey on focaccia, a personal favorite of my son Ping, before he would hit the pool for afternoon swim practice.

To make matters worse, Chip had a supply problem…he had too much beef and nowhere to sell it. His restaurants were now doing a quarter of the big beefy business they had done in the golden years of the Clinton Administration, especially when the fat, philandering fuck machine himself would stroll into the Rockville Pike Arby’s every other week. Yes, Chip was in trouble, locked into a series of futures contracts with the cattlemen, he had an oversupply of product and also could not take advantage of falling meat prices; you didn’t want to get on the bad side of a cattleman, as anyone who has ever seen Lee Marvin’s Prime Cut can attest.

Prime Cut…thought-provoking flick about sellin’ meat.

Archibald’s: A DC Institution 

Adding to his business problems was an embargo on sales of American meat to Asia, which made offloading the product nearly impossible for Chip. But just as things were looking their worst, my friend happened to overhear a conversation at Archibald’s, a primo titty bar not a stone’s throw from the White House. This was a deep conversation between some powerful people, men obviously, who were high ranking officials in the Brazilian government, United Nations, and International Olympics Committee respectfully. Fat knockers in their faces, the men were in discussions as to a public relations problem. With the Rio Olympics rapidly approaching, increasing scrutiny was being paid to the country by the international community. 

Already, Brazil was being ridiculed for the thing. After all, said the UN official, how could the country’s leadership deem it appropriate to host an Olympic Games, to spend billions in public money for volleyball courts and golf courses, while upwards of a half a million children in Rio’s favelas met the World Health Organization’s definition of malnourishment?! At this, one of the Brazilian politicians laughed, “Sure they are poor children today,” he said, “but in two years, when you come for the Olympics...they will be the ones flashing a fake police badge to rob you at a ‘military checkpoint.’ You’ll come back to us, to the bullet caucus, and ask...why were you not tougher on the children...why did you not throw the children in a prison? But today is not that day...on this day, you wish for the children to have what, an order of curly fries...perhaps, a Big Montana?” 

Better lucky than good, thought Chip Rosenbaum, turning around to introduce himself. Almost overnight, my friend’s business woes became a venture of formidable opportune...selling American products to a bunch of Latin American fascists...a tale as old as time. Besides, what’s the worst that could happen?

“Surely, aren’t you out of the sportswriting business? Chip asked. “I mean, these people are so corrupt, and no matter what you write, it’s 2016 man...literally no one cares. It’s just another blip on the rolling screen. Fuck man, ever since the Internet and that chucklehead Kornheiser yapping on ESPN...I mean...face it Surely, sportswriting is dead.”

Dad’s least favorite intern.

Chip had me on that. I was done writing. Even if there was no story, there was no one on the other end who would give the corruption story the respect it deserved.

And so, every morning for the past two years, Isabel and I have awoken in the same bed near dawn. I make us coffee as the two of us wait in silence for the large truck and the men. When the truck arrives, a burlap bag is placed over our heads and drives to an airstrip. The bags come off just as a large cargo plane touches down over the flora and fauna of the rain forest. Sometimes Chip is there but most days he’s nowhere to be found as Isabel and I are in charge of monitoring the unloading process. The plane emptied and the inventory accounted for, we’re blindfolded again, back to Rio, where the truckdriver takes us to the various drop zones. We continue to oversee the men, loading up all of the hot carts we own with curly fries and fresh-ish meats to sell throughout their respective territories. After that it’s around 9 am and time for breakfast…a nice spread at the small café down the road from our place…we take up our own cart a short time later.

Indeed, we were doing great things…not only in Brazil, but also back home, where I still could not return because of the whole extradition thing with Ping and Warren Wagglestein, Esq. Instead, we gave a bulk of our money to philanthropic causes back in Rockville and the DC suburbs. We started by making Chip’s brother Barry the head of our foundation, the Native Washingtonian Association. We had a lot of causes during this time, restoring the cafeteria at the Ring House was Chip’s pet project, as his mother was still there and he got a year’s rent free on account of the remodel. For me, it was two vanity projects. The first was the Danny Gatton Guitar School, a big honkin’ grant given to Montgomery College to teach inner city kids from Southern Rockville how to play smooth rockabilly. The second project was more ambitious. The NWA soup kitchen was created to mentor Washington’s next generation of soup masters. We endowed an entire school for the thing, out in Olney dedicated to the culinary arts of broth and balls. My hope…to one day recreate the BJ Pumpernickel’s establishment that Shirely Povich, Sr. had so dearly loved.

Danny fucking Gatton! (Image: © Clayton Call/Getty Images)

Even with NWA going great, I guess there’s a part of me that knew it couldn’t last. Chip and I were always getting into fights over petty stuff. Like when we ran out of imported meat from America and Ever had a burger made out of jaguar? All the Horsey Sauce in the world can’t do it justice. Believe me.

One day, I got fed up with it all.

“Chip, the product is getting worse. You can’t cut beef meat with jaguar and expect to get repeat customers.”

“They’re fuckin’ Brazilians, Surely. Besides, our profit margins have never been higher. What do you care?”

“We’re decimating the population of an endangered species.”

“We’re sourcing locally and reducing our carbon footprint. Isn’t that what you lib yahoos are all about these days?”

A Jaguar lookin’ regal on the Brazilian Fifty Dollar Bill. We fed their meat to people after the demand became too large for our supply chain of week-old beef comin’ from the United States. Members of the Social Christian party loved the idea back in 2016. Swell guys. 

I shrugged. At the end of the day, I was only a minority partner in the business. Chip was holding all the cards. And maybe he was even right about the thing. We were paying Arby’s for all this imported meat that had to travel thousands of miles to get here. That’s jet fuel and a pilot you have to pay for. If you just kill a jaguar, you only have to pay the hunter…and the reserve is only a hop, skip, and jump from downtown Rio. Besides, the kids were learning guitar in Bethesda. And more importantly, the soup was flowing out there in Olney.

Or was it? Even though I couldn’t get back to the States, I still managed to get updates from Chip’s brother from time to time. A few months after we opened the schools, Barry Rosenbaum came down to Brazil to meet with his brother. But first, he showed me a video of two of the kids at the guitar school.

“Classic Gatton,” I recognized, marveling at the young ingenues, soloing away on a pair of Fender Telecasters.

“And that’s not all,” said Barry, taking out a thing of Tupperware and placing it on the table. I recognized it instantly, matzoh ball soup straight outta the NWA kitchen. “Whaddya say, Surely…you got a stove?”

I jumped at the chance. All those months of tinkering, could it really be? Did we really perfect the BJ Pumpernickel’s recipe? Sure, Barry’s goons had paid off the previous owners for the world-famous recipe, but who’s to say if they gave us the real deal. With much anticipation, I lit the gas burner and set it to low, so that the icy block of soup would slowly revert to a beautiful, golden hue. I began to salivate.

Chip came in just then.

“Moment of truth, Surely,” he said. “What’re you waiting for?”

I ladled out the soup for the three of us.

“Gentlemen, I propose a toast,” I said. “To my old friend Chip, without whom, none of this would be possible.”

“Here! Here!” said Barry.

“Here goes nothin,” I said, diving in. Slowly I brought the spoon to my face. The broth was on point, thick but not too thick, and full of rich schmaltz…now for the balls…

“You backstabbing, lying, sack of shit,” I said, dropping the spoon.

“What?”

“Don’t play fucking coy with me, fuckface,” I said. I removed a pistol from my gray sweat shorts and pointed it at Barry Rosenbaum’s head.

“Surely, what the fuck?!”

“Both you and I know…these aren’t the Pumpernickel’s balls. “First the jaguar meat and now this…just what the hell kinda trick you think you’re trying to pull here, Chip?”

The look on Chip’s face faded from disbelief to that of a large grin. “Well, well, well,” he said, clapping his hands, “and here I thought you were nothing but muscle.”

So everything was a lie? In a moment it dawned on me.

“This is the Hofberg’s matzoh soup,” I recognized, almost choking on the words. “Chip, how could you?”

“It’s better…it’s always been better. I mean, BJ Pumpernickel’s…are you fucking kidding me, Surely. Do you know BJ Pumpernickel was not even a real person? Now Abe Hofberg….shit, that was a soupmaster you could set your watch to.”

“You disgust me,” I said, cutting the inferior ball with the side of my spoon. “My father would be rolling over in his grave if he knew the kids at our soup school were learning the Hofberg’s recipe. For goddsakes, he’d rather them learn the Silver Diner matzoh ball than the shit they made over there.”

“The Silver Diner never made matzoh ball soup. It’s a figment of your fucking imagination.”

“They did too. In the spring of ’78…you had gone to some special basketball camp because you were a bigshot athlete…I stayed in Rockville and had a barback gig at the Bethesda Yacht Club. Every morning, I’d kick a new gurly outta bed and head over to Silver Diner for a cup of the stuff. It was the greatest summer of my life.”

This stuff is on par with Hofberg’s, if you ask me.

“The same summer you fucked Sherri Epstein, right Surely? My girlfriend. Hey, no hard feelings pal…I know you weren’t…Sherri told me all about it. Besides, even if you wanted Pumpernickel’s soup, you couldn’t get it…only Barry has the recipe, and it’s all the way back in Olney, where you can’t go because of you owe for your biological son. Face it, Surely, those kids are going to learn the Hofberg’s soup backwards and forwards…and there’s not a fucking thing you can do about it…tell you what though, anytime you want a container of the stuff, I’ll have Barry bring it down for you whenever you want. Sound good?”

Smelling defeat, I lowered the gun from Chip’s brother’s temple. “From here on out, we’re not friends anymore…only partners.”

“Fine by me,” said Chip, ladling himself another round. “Not such a Mighty Mo now, are ya?”

I walk out and back to Isabel’s feeling worse than I had ever felt in my entire sixty-seven years. I had lost.

The next morning Isabel and I wake up for work. Same routine. The truck comes to our place and the two of us greet the two burlap bags that are placed over our heads. The truck starts up and starts to drive. Wrong direction. Gone are the sounds of the rainforest and the secret airstrip, with its black market planes and illicit cargo. Instead, we’re brought inside some kind of abandoned office building—through the blindfold, I make out the scant outlines of an old microfiche reader—we’re inside an old newsroom! Before I can break free and steal ancient office supplies, we’re ushered into a small enclosure with a familiar chemical smell I recognize must be the paper’s dark room. I can tell Isabel is scared but I tell her not to worry as the blindfolds come off.

“Surely…Povich…Jr.”

“Hello Trevor.”

 Stay tuned for Part IV of my amazing Amazonian adventure!

#danny gatton #prime cut #gene hackman #lee marvin #arby's #rockville pike #rockville #chevy chase #maryland #chip rosenbaum #hofberg's #silver diner #ledo's pizza #panera bread #montgomery college #ring house #bj pumpernickels #olney #kornheiser #shirley povich #potomac #Charles WOODWARD #jeffrey gildenhorn #american city diner #brazil #rio de janeiro #microfiche #trevor #archibald's #matzoh ball soup

[that-bat-blog]

@sleepysupersnuggles​ tagged me in w/ my art blog but I’m tryna keep it strictly art so here we go-

LAST

Drink: 7up free (because the can is much cuter than regular 7up)

Phone call: Probably my mum asking what time I was coming home

Text message (I’m gonna go with general messages because I never get texts): Basically my friend talking to me about how hot my OC Kai is, and me very much agreeing with him

Song: Dangerous Woman by Ariana Grande

Time you cried: Friday, I threw up and I always cry when I’m sick

EVER

Dated someone twice: The only person I’ve ever dated is my current boyfriend and we’ve been together since we were fifteen (five years in February)

Kissed someone and regretted it: Not that I can think of??

Been cheated on: I sure hope not

Lost someone special: My Grandma passed away last year but we weren’t very close or anything. I do have friends from high school I wish I could’ve kept contact with more I suppose

Been depressed: yea boi

Gotten drunk and thrown up: Never been drunk so nope

Fave colours: Red. Its just a good colour 

IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU

Made new friends: Absolutely! I joined my boyfriends D&D game and everyones become really quick friends with me, its great

Fallen out of love: Nope and I don’t imagine I will any time soon

Laughed until you cried: Who hasn’t??

Found out someone was talking about you: In highschool it wasn’t really behind my back it was more snidey comments and such

Met someone who changed you: I used to hate puns and bad jokes, now I make them too often. Thanks Danny

Found out who your friends are: There was this one particular friend in primary/high school that I recently found some stuff about and I knew she was kinda shitty but had no idea how shitty she actually was

Kissed someone on your Facebook friends list: yes

GENERAL

How many of your Facebook friends do you know irl: All of them, I’ve never friended anyone I haven’t known

Do you have any pets: I have two lovely ladies. An Alaskan Malamute called Koda and a half jack russell, half staff called Lola

Do you want to change your name: I hate that my name has a million spellings but I still like it. The only time I can imagine changing it is if I get married

What did you do for your last birthday: I’m not much of a partygoer so I just stayed in and ordered takeaway

What were you doing at midnight last night:  Listening to music full blast and staring at the ceiling for hours as per usual

What is something you can’t wait for: My top to get delivered, I’ve been eyeing it for a while and finally got around to ordering it

What are you listening to you right now: My boyfriends rendition of the MII menu song

Have you ever talked to a person named Tom: I went to school with about six Toms so I’ve definitely spoken to one of them

Something that gets on your nerves: All my brothers

Most visited website: Tumblr most likely or Youtube I guess

Hair colour: It was half white and black not long ago but now its all black

Long or short hair: I had very short hair over a year ago and now I’m actually trying to see how long I can get it to grow, so both really. Also my boyfriend has very long golden flowing hair and I’m a little jealous

Do you have a crush on someone: Dick Grayson, its been a crush since I was like six and it hasn’t gone away

What do you like about yourself: Body wise, I have a nice torso??? Personality wise, I like to think I’m creative and hopefully approachable?

Want any piercings: I would love piercings but I hate being stabbed so thats a no-no. If I manged to though, I would love more ear piercings, my septum piercing and my nips cos that shit hot

Blood type: I actually have no idea

Nicknames: Kate, Katie, Kit Kat, Chicken Pie, Monkey Pud, BItch etc

Relationship status: If you haven’t gathered I’m very not single

Zodiac: Aquarius, and apparently Aquarius’ are very aloof which is very me

Pronouns: She’s a WoMaN

Fave TV shows: I’m currently on an Avatar: the last airbender rewatch, one of my childhood faves and totally looking forward to season 3 of Young Justice. Not that into live action shows or anything

Tattoos: If it involves needles, thats a nope

Right or left handed: Right handed 

Ever had surgery: Dental sorta shit but thats about it

Piercings: Ears when I was 10ish and I nearly passed out afterwards

Sport: HAHAHAHAHAHAhahahahahahaha

Vacation: I haven’t got any plans any time soon but I have been to Barcelona, Brisbane and Bulgaria

MORE GENERAL

Eating: Was eating Skips earlier

Drinking: Still in that pretty 7up free

About to watch: Probably some crappy action movie

Waiting for: Me to get the confidence to open commissions and finish some artwork

Want: To move out, I would really like to get a place with my boyfriend and I’m sure my brother who’s going to college and is 6ft odd would appreciate having a bigger bedroom

Get married: Maybe in the not so far future??

Career: I really want to get myself out there and just start making some good art. I love drawing for people because I know it makes them happy so it makes me happy too; they always say do something that you enjoy

WHICH IS BETTER

Hugs or kisses: A mixture of both is always good

Lips or eyes: Eyes, they’re so pretty and no pair is really the same

Shorter or taller: Taller, I want people to sweep me off my feet and make me feel dainty

Older or younger: Older I guess?

Nice arms or stomach: Gimme those beefy arms

Hookup or relationship: Relationship, never really understood the enjoyment behind a hookup

Troublemaker or hesitant: God please hesitant, my anxiety can’t take troublemaker

HAVE YOU EVER

Kissed a stranger: Again like the hookups, never really appealed to me. The idea of just kissing someone you don’t know if gross

Drunk hard liquor: Does a large glass of coke with the tiniest bit of vodka count

Lost glasses: My pair now are the first ones I’ve had and I haven’t lost them just yet

Turned someone down: The guy who introduced me to my boyfriend in high school....yeah

Sex on first date: Only had one first date, we were 15, he was 3 hours late and we went to see Transformers 3 so that should tell you all you need to know

Broken someones heart: Highly doubt it

Had your heart broken: nah

Been arrested: I’ve been in a police van and car but never been arrested

Cried when someone died: I didn’t cry my Grandma died, at her funeral and I still haven’t

Fallen for a friend: Well Danny was a friend before we went out so I guess??

DO YOU BELIEVE IN

Yourself: I wouldn’t trust me with an egg

Miracles: Nope

Love at first sight: Nope, love is hard af

Santa Claus: Not anymore like

Kiss on a first date: I mean if you’re both up for it, sure!

Angels: Atheist so nah

OTHERS

Best friend’s name: Phoebe, we’ve been friends for 8 years now, the first thing she ever said to me was “your cake looks like its on crack” and we’ve been friends ever since

Eye colour: Steely blue, I’m the only one of my dads six kids to get his eye colour, everyone else has their mothers

Fave movie: I don’t really have a favourite, I spend more time watching Youtube videos than anything else really

Fave actors: Never really had a favourite, just generally anyone who is a sweetheart

Thanks for tagging me in Nina!! I’m gonna tag @izzy-cat and @cattwomannn and really anyone else can have a go!!

#personal #long post

[dorothydelgadillo]

The Only Thing Stopping Your Successful Tech Career Is…

Let me guess: you’re so over your current career, and—from everything you’ve read and heard—tech sounds like a dream path for getting to where you’d rather be. Working on interesting, creative projects in a cutting-edge industry? Check. Getting paid a salary that can actually help you get ahead on your bills? Check. Being able to work a flexible schedule from outside a traditional brick and mortar office? Check on that, too. So why aren’t you already learning tech skills, like yesterday? Whatever reasons you feel are holding you back from pursuing the tech career of your dreams, I bet they have something in common with what we hear from our students on a daily basis.

The good news is, no matter how real and overwhelming these reasons might seem to you, they’re not nearly as big a problem as you might think—in fact, they might not even be a problem at all. So sit back and read on as we round up the top five reasons you haven’t started your tech career yet, and you’ll see why each of these myths need to be returned to the Fiction section—stat!

I Don’t Have the Time

Perception of time can derail any kind of career change —specifically the amount of time needed to learn the skills and acquire the credentials or certifications necessary for taking on a new job. Flashbacks to years spent languishing in college classrooms are enough to send even the most iron-willed career change prospects running for the hills, and an industry like tech—with its arcane sounding acronyms and terminology—seems like a particularly intensive time commitment.

The Facts:

But feel free to breathe a sigh of relief—it won’t take that long to learn the basics you’ll need to break into tech. Unlike careers that really will take years to transition into, tech is realistically approachable within a year or less of training—a statement that’s been consistently affirmed to me by tech professionals. Whether it’s a tech pro like Wendy Zenone, Application Security Engineer at Lending Club, who worked adjacent to tech in marketing and established her foundational tech skills through a 12-week coding bootcamp, Blair McKee, Digital Marketing Manager at DNS Made Easy who entered tech in a non-technical role as a copywriter and taught herself web design over the course of a year, or Matt Hubbard, Director of Operations at Fullcontact, who worked in foreign policy and landed his first tech job before he’d even finished taking classes in information systems, I have yet to hear a story where it took someone multiple years to gain the skills they needed to start in tech.

The serious time investment in tech comes more on the back end, after you’re already employed. Although it’s a short timeline to get started, once you do start working in tech you’ll begin a lifetime of learning, adapting, and improving—it’s simply part of the industry. As Izzy Piyale-Sheard, Community Manager at coding bootcamp Lighthouse Labs, told me, even instructors with 20 years of experience at his company are still constantly learning. The upside with tech is that all this learning is on the clock and built-in as part of the job. So if concerns about time have been holding you back, let them go. The time is now!

It’s Too Expensive

Even if tech skills don’t come with a prohibitive time investment, what about the money? The term “tech” brings to mind self-driving cars, commercial space flights, and inflated real estate markets. That all sounds expensive, so it must mean learning tech skills is ridiculously pricey too, right? Wrong! While there will, of course, be a money investment if you attend coding bootcamps or enroll in coding classes online, with average yearly college tuitions for state schools coming in at a staggering $14,210, any amount you pay will be a fraction of what it costs to get a conventional degree. What’s more, there are two significant factors that ease the sting of paying to learn tech skills.

The Facts:

The first is the fact that entry-level tech jobs have a track record of returning on their investment within months of employment. In speaking with Skillcrush alum Chi-Chi Ross, she told me that she landed her first tech job two months after she started a Skillcrush course (and three weeks before the course was even finished). “I was able to make back the money I spent on the course and keep earning significantly more that I’d been able to make before,” Ross said. “Once I started working at my new job I more than doubled what I was making—in fact I saw a 108% increase in my income.”

Similarly, Emily K. Olson told me that by the time she finished learning HTML and CSS through Skillcrush, she’d already landed a remote job with a New York City based company, allowing her to make back the money she’d spent on classes while working from her home on the West Coast (in between travelling the world). “Not only did I earn back the money I invested before I really had a chance to miss it,” Olson said, “but learning tech skills has changed the way I feel, the way I see myself, and improved my life overall for the better.”

However, even when a return on investment is imminent, it doesn’t mean you won’t miss the initial cash until then. But there’s good news on that front too: unlike what you might remember from college or other certification programs where high tuition was accompanied by outrageous materials and textbook fees, free tech resources abound! Whether you’re learning tech skills or once you’re working in the industry, so many of the tools and information you’ll need cost absolutely nothing. Of particular interest if you’re just getting started are free blogs and forums like Codrops and Stack Overflow where you can find tutorials, web design blueprints, Q&A forums and more, all totally free of charge. So don’t believe the hype—99-percenters can afford to learn tech skills, too!

I’m Not Smart Enough

When people want to assure someone that a skill or task doesn’t require any exceptional level of intelligence or know-how, they often trot out the old cliche, “it’s not rocket science.” But when we’re talking about tech, it’s not as easy to dismiss that way. Computers, smartphones, tablets, smartwatches, and all the apps and software that run on them sure seem pretty “rocket sciencey,” which leads to doubts that those of us who aren’t already rocket scientists or preternaturally gifted with genius IQs are simply “not smart enough” to learn tech skills. This fear seems to come from a misunderstanding of tech more than any genuine intellectual challenges, and “smart”—more often than not—really translates to, “I’m not good at math,” something that might seem to be a requirement for tech, but totally isn’t.

The Facts:

When it comes to thinking that math is a big part of tech, no one will fault you for that preconception—I mean, the whole thing is built on 1’s and 0’s—but it really isn’t the case in practice. When I interviewed tech pros on the subject last summer, Monica Lent, Lead Front End Engineer at SumUp, told me that she personally struggled with math all through school. “I was terrible at geometry, terrible at algebra, didn’t complete calculus. I’m even slow at arithmetic,” Lent said. Still, that hasn’t stopped Lent from managing a team of five web developers and proving that math and computer science aren’t the only direct routes to a tech career. Web Developer Charlotte O’Hara, who also described having no background in math outside of basic arithmetic, says this is possible because most web development projects don’t rely heavily on math at all. According to O’Hara, critical thinking and an eye for design are far more important as a web developer than math calculations.

Even so, it’s also important to remember that your own perceptions of being “smart” or “good at math” are often just that—perceptions. Ultimately, my previous look at math and coding led to a 2017 Science Magazine study that suggests our perception of our ability (and not our ability itself) is a huge determinant for success. So rather than convince yourself what you can’t do, think about what you can do, and couple that positive attitude with the encouraging examples of others who have paved the way before you.

It’s Too Risky to Make a Change

Yeah, your job sucks, but you know it’s there and you know what to expect from it. What happens if you take the time and spend the money to learn tech skills, but then can’t find a job in tech? And even if you do find a tech job, can you count on it being secure going into the future? For the risk averse, this kind of gamble might seem too high stakes—but it turns out, tech isn’t really a gamble at all.

The Facts:

I recently looked into the question of tech job security, and the first thing I found was data from the Bureau of Labor Statistics listing software/application developers as the 5th-place growth job between now and 2026. What’s more, of the 30 occupations listed, developers came in second place for median salaries ($100,080). This paints a pretty clear picture that tech jobs will be plentiful and high paying for the foreseeable future. And, as Dasha Moore, Chief Operating Officer and Founder at Solodev explained to me, tech job growth doesn’t just mean more numbers of the same kind of jobs—instead, it speaks directly to the fact that tech is continuing to penetrate more and more industries and positions, meaning more opportunities and greater job security with every passing year. As tech becomes increasingly entrenched in every aspect of business, government, manufacturing, healthcare, etc., the concern should become less about whether investing in tech skills is risky, and more about how risky it is not to!

I’m Too Old

A question we hear a lot when helping with customer support at Skillcrush is whether prospective tech learners are “too old” to learn tech skills. Interestingly, the “old” in this question is all over the map, as it comes in from enquirers aged 16 to 65 (and all points in between). On one hand, it’s a very easy question to answer (simply, “no”), but this age issue often becomes a very real (if very unnecessary) obstacle in learning tech skills (or making any major career changes). As someone who started working outside the home again in my 40’s after 12 years as a full-time parent, I can speak to the fact that I let the “too old” hangup get in my way for a long time.

The Facts:

Last September we started a blog feature titled “Who Codes?”, looking at diversity in the tech industry (believe it or not, tech consists of a lot more than the proverbial dudes in their 20’s high-fiving and wearing hoodies), and—over the three installments we’ve run so far—four of the six coders we’ve featured are in their 40’s, well outside the stereotype of the tech wunderkind. One of those 40-something coders—Jill Caren, owner of digital agency 2 Dogs Media LLC—didn’t even start coding until she was in her 30’s. After spending a lot of money hiring someone else to build a website for her retail business and being disappointed with the final product, Caren taught herself PHP, CSS, and HTML so she could be the designer, and—in the process—realized web development was what she actually wanted to be doing career-wise (and what she’s still doing successfully today).

Precisely because tech skills are so accessible, and—as discussed above—are neither prohibitively time consuming or expensive to learn, any time and any age is the right time to add them to your toolkit. If you let your age fears win, all that happens is you’ll be another day older tomorrow, but you won’t have started learning tech skills—and even then, you STILL won’t be too old to start!

from Web Developers World https://skillcrush.com/2018/01/03/the-only-thing-stopping-your-successful-tech-career-is/

[arrowsandwhiskeykisses]

always the whirlwind romance 3/?

ao3 

 malec. jace/magnus(not going into much detail with this ship). explicit (later chapters). trope galore. chapter 3/?

summary

“So a tattooist, huh?”

“Yep, it’s always a pleasure to see my work on someone else’s skin.” Dragging out the word with a playful smirk before taking a gulp of his drink, eyes filled with a mischief as he kept eye contact over the rim of the glass, causing Magnus’ stomach clench into knots.

Magnus was not prepared for this man.

so how long?

The night went on quite smoothly, drinks were flowing and laughter ensued. The travelling pair sharing stories of their journey. How they had met up and decided to stick together. Bonding over art from the historical to modern, both being involved in the arts, Clary with her pencils and paints, Alec with his needles and ink.

“It is as stereotypically wet as everyone says it is,” Clary pulled a face, “but nevertheless, still enjoyable. Very unpredictable weather, cloudy, sunny and then rainy all in one day.”

“But besides that you had fun?”

“It was amazing! I would love to go back. Imagine a group trip, that would be wonderful.”

“That would be dangerous.” Alec chimed in with a slight smirk, “You’re enough to handle on your own whilst drunk, I don’t even want to imagine what it would be like with Izzy also there, I don’t think the Brits would stand a chance.” Laughing as he tried to evade the hands that were currently trying to pummel him from his sister.

“Don’t be a dick.” Huffing, trying not to smile. Isabelle was thrilled to have her brother back, they’d always had a close relationship, they were always there for each other.

Sipping at his drink, Magnus smirked in amusement, observing the interactions of everybody. It warmed his heart to see a group of people so dedicated to each other. At some point in the night, he found himself sat between Alec and Clary with Jace sat opposite who was currently deep in conversation with Isabelle and Simon, laughing at something that seemed to make Simon blush.

“So how long?”

“Hm? How long what?”

“How long have you been together?”

Blinking momentarily, Magnus dragged his attention to the redhead beside him, mulling over the months in his head.

“I think I would say about six months? Maybe a bit over, I’m not sure. We don’t really keep track on it. It’s been wonderful though.” Smiling softly, head turned away from Alec causing him to miss the slight frown the pulled at Alec’s face. The taller trying to focus his gaze somewhere else than the back of Magnus’ head.

“Oh, that’s something.” Nudging him in the ribs with her elbow, a small smile on her face. “Yet I still had to hear it from Simon.”

“Well, you are attached at the hip for the most part and I haven’t heard from you in a while.”

“I’m sorry about that, things just got so hectic that I wasn’t able to keep up with everyone.” Clary sent Magnus an apologetic smile, leaning into his shoulder a little.

“No worries, Biscuit. It’s understandable but you’re back now and it probably means we’ll be seeing a lot more of each other.”

Letting a few beats of silence wash over them, Magnus drank his drink before moving his gaze over to his other side to the man sat there.

“So a tattooist, huh?”

“Yep, it’s always a pleasure to see my work on someone else’s skin.” Dragging out the word with a playful smirk before taking a gulp of his drink, eyes filled with a mischief as he kept eye contact over the rim of the glass, causing Magnus’ stomach clench into knots.

Magnus was not prepared for this man.

When he heard about the Alec Lightwood, he was expecting a reserved, not fuzzy yet warm hearted character. Not this hot as sin man, with a smile that can melt hearts and makes dirty innuendos that makes Magnus almost choke on his drink.

“Alec, that was terrible, you nearly made Magnus choke.” Clary chastised with a laugh.

“Oh believe me, Darling, I can handle a lot more before that happens.”

A collective groan happened yet Alec beamed.

And that smile did things to Magnus. What was he doing? Flirting with Jace’s brother. Well, Jace and everyone knew that Magnus was a big flirt in general with his personality, it was harmless but something didn’t sit right here. As the night went on, the flirting with Alec didn’t seem so light hearted and it worried Magnus. Worried Jace would pick up on it and get angry but he seemed completely oblivious that Magnus started to think he might have been overthinking things or at the very least, Jace trusted him.

He hoped it was the latter.

“So what are you planning to do now that you’re back in New York? Are you staying or is this just a visit?”

Letting out a thoughtful hum, Alec turned his gaze to look at Magnus, blue eyes capturing him in a way that he couldn’t look away.

“I believe I’m going to stay a while, I’ve missed the City and I can’t imagine being anywhere else right now.”

This made Magnus’ cheeks feel vaguely warm. He hadn’t ever had this reaction to someone before, not even when he and Jace started. He just hoped it would pass him by and he could forget about it, it wasn’t anything to worry about.

“And anyway, I’ve got a residency to start and it looks promising in the long term. A respectable place in Manhattan but a few tattoo shops in Brooklyn have expressed a desire for me to do guest spots, which I wouldn’t mind doing once I’ve got my feet on the ground.”

Alec had gained the attention of the table, everyone had quietened down to listen to him. He just seemed to have that presence that people wanted to pay attention to.

“That sounds exciting to say the least. I would love to see your work sometime.”

“I have photos I can show you but you’re welcome by to see my portfolios, you may see something you may even like yourself.”

A wink was sent Magnus’ way.

“Hell yeah, Bro! This means you can finally get started on what we had planned.”

Jace’s excited tone brought Magnus’ attention back to the group, head slightly hazy.

“Yeah, I spoke to the guys at the parlour and I can schedule you in as one of my main clients. You’re still wanting a back piece right?”

“Of course.” Confirming with a nod before moving to stand. “I’m getting more drinks, another round?” A slight cheer went up with a laugh here and there causing Jace to roll his eyes before making his way to the bar. Magnus followed him with his eyes before finishing the rest of his drink.

Alec had been fiddling with his phone for a few moments before nudging Magnus to gain back his attention, holding his phone so they could both see the screen. Magnus was captivated by the images he was seeing. It was no doubt that Alec had talent, he could see why he was in demand and he definitely wouldn’t mind seeing something like this on Jace’s body, he wasn’t opposed to something like this even on his own body. Not something he had ever really thought about before. That was an idea he would stick a pin in for another day.

The subject of conversation then made its way to Magnus’ job, Clary’s disbelief that he managed to get Simon, clumsy flailing Simon, into a pretty decent dancer.

“How did that even happen?”

“Well, you know that I love a challenge and that was one of the biggest challenges I’ve faced,” another indignant noise, “but he is quite good. You should come watch some time.”

“Okay guys, I know I’m not the most graceful of people but there is something about dancing that can just clicks.”

That caused Simon to receive some semi-serious replies because for all the ribbing that he gets, they’re still all friends. Still can be proud of what they all can accomplish.

It was then Jace arrived back with more drinks for everyone, tray being placed down in the middle of the table.

“Are we talking about how Simon doesn’t actually have two left feet?”

Smirking as he moved around Izzy to grip the other man’s shoulder with a friendly shake, avoiding the slap sent his way.

“Boys, boys, calm down. I swear you two are like children.” Izzy laughed as she tried to separate them, caught in the middle.

This was something Magnus enjoyed, watching how carefree Jace was, it made his heart clench before he turned his attention back to Alec, everyone falling into different conversations.

“So, a dancer, huh?”

“Indeed, and a pretty great one at that.”

“Well, I see you’re very modest.”

“Why should I play down my best talent that supports my living?”

The look the other man was giving him made Magnus squirm on the inside, it was deep and imploring. Something he was not used to, it was like Alec was taking him apart, trying to solve a puzzle that Magnus didn’t think he was.

“You are right and it’s refreshing. You should be proud of yourself from what I’ve heard from the other’s. Running a successful dance school along with your other projects. Don’t you have some music videos that you’re to take part in?”

“How do you know about those?”                                                                    

“I’m not the only person these guys seem to talk about so admiringly.”

This made Magnus glance up at his friends, the people he considered his family, feeling extremely lucky to have them by his side.

“And I had to do my own research about the wonder that is Magnus Bane and I must say, you are pretty impressive.”

Paying too much attention to the people around the table, falling onto Jace that the dancer missed the appreciative gaze that ran up and down his form.

It became a common occurrence now that the group would meet up at the bar. Often as a whole group but also frequently by whoever could show up. Magnus liked going to keep their friend Maia company as she worked. They were close, sibling like, he was as close to an older brother she never had.

He cared for them all deeply. It had been less than a year that the others had become so important to him, apart from Simon who he had known for some years with his dear Clary. He was the oldest of them all and he would protect them at all costs. They all had their pasts and Magnus would always provide them with the support they needed, the one they all would go to.

Now he had Clary back but he was now welcoming Alec into the fold and it was too easy. Letting this man in. It was easy and it scared him but he was Jace’s brother. And that was why it was easy.

At least that is what he told himself. 

“Hnnn…”

It was hot, it was burning, it was pleasure, it was rushed.

A quick fumble under the covers before collapsing down onto their backs. Magnus felt limp and sated, Jace breathing heavily beside him as they let the feeling gradually return to the bodies.

“Fuck, you know there should be a religion just dedicated to your mouth, it deserves worship.”

“I believe that goes against what religion is for.” Letting out a breathless chuckle, head tilting to look at his lover who replied with lazy flick of the hand.

“Technicalities. The point still stands. Your mouth is positively sinful.”

Magnus rolled his eyes before moving to sit up, picking up the silken robe that had been dropped to the floor, slipping it over his body as he stood, knotting it loosely in the front.

“Coffee?”

“Nah, I’m fine. I need to make my way out actually. I have to be at the gym in an hour for a client, so I only have time for a quick shower before heading out.”

Making his way around to Magnus, not caring about his nakedness, moving to place a lingering kiss to the other’s lips before making his way through the loft to the bathroom. Magnus couldn’t help but watch that ass as the blonde walked away, letting out a quiet sigh, grinning slightly.

“Damn.”

Sweat was building up on his skin as he moved. Arms moving fluidly to roll down the rest of his body. The music reverberated through his bones as he danced. Feet gliding over the floor as he took advantage of the space he had. Body turning with precision, a jerk here, a twist there, eyes concentrating on the mirror to ensure the movements were correct, stopping here and there to repeat a movement, clearly unhappy with what he had just done.

It was all about practice.

Move and repeat.

Repeat.

He could hear the class next door practising. He wasn’t the only instructor there, he wouldn’t be able to handle his own dancers, run the place and focus on his own career that branched out further than this. The school would always be his baby but he would always push himself further.

Pausing for a moment to gather his breath before restarting the routine as the music picked up again, the playlist he created pouring into the room from the sound system.

He pushed himself through a complicated manoeuvre eyes focused on the mirror in front of him before he stopped suddenly, eyes catching sight of someone leaning against the wall. Someone who happened to be Alec.

“Alexander?”

Moving over to pause the music, dropping them into silence.

“Alexander? Nobody has called me that in years.” A broad smile pulled at the taller’s lips as he pushed himself off the wall to stand straight.

“Sorry, I don’t know why I called you that, Alec.”

“No, no. I like it.”

Rolling his eyes, Magnus moved to wipe himself down with his nearby towel, he was desperately in need of a shower.

“What can I do for you? Did Jace send you?”

“… No, Jace didn’t send me.” There was something a little off about Alec’s voice, eyes drawn to Magnus’ arms before clearing his throat. “I just thought I would come and see you in action and Isabelle told me where to find you.”

“Oh … Okay. You know you shouldn’t really sneak up on someone like that.”

“Well, I’m pretty sure I announced my presence but you were too focused so I decided to let you continue and you are right, you’re great at what you do.”

Smirking at Magnus before stepping a bit closer.

“I was wondering if you wanted to go get something to eat, I asked the others if they wanted to join but they were busy.”

“Well I was going to see if your brother wanted to do something…”

“He didn’t tell you?” Alec frowned a little, Magnus decided that as attractive Alec was in his seriousness, he liked the smile better.

“Tell me what?”

“Him and Clary met up a bit ago and had gone for food with Izzy.”

…

“He did?”

Magnus felt uncomfortable as Alec nodded, he wondered why Jace hadn’t said anything.

“Okay then… Sure, why not. Let me go home and clean myself up and we can meet up wherever we’re going.”

“There’s a Thai place not too far away that is recommended, I’ll text you the address and I’ll see you there at seven.” Alec spoke as he walked backwards to the exit, eyes on Magnus.

“Yeah sure…”

Alec was about to disappear from sight.

“Wait, you don’t have my number!”

But Alec was gone and Magnus was confused before…

“Isabelle…”

#atwr #otp: i'm all for effort #malec is endgame #my writing #chapter fic #i love tropes #all the tropes