#what a damn chore

[derpinette]

i have a weird relationship with weight because i hated eating more than anything the moment i was ready for solids ( i hate chewing with my entire life always have & will ) which made me underweight for most of my life ( to this day ) & during late primary-middle school this made me actively suicidal because i felt like something was wrong with my sex because i just was not developing whatsoever prompting me to have a years long phase of trying to gain weight in any way i could ( #EPICFAIL by the way ) & i was already insecure but i felt seriously so unforgivably ugly after bullying not just at school but by adults of my entourage. but then i did in my late 15s which prompted the pendulum to swing in the other direction & suddenly i FREAKED OUT & thought well being skinny is pretty much all i have & know myself to be & clearly it is not going to last forever so i Better preserve it i was delusional about how skinny i thought i was actually i look stumpy & weird i have to prove myself. But now i am normal again kind of

#also i used to get beaten to finish my food nearly daily & it would take me forever to do that like literally hours with no exaggeration #just made me hate eating even more. now my technique is eating as fast as possible before i even realize how overwhelming #the sensory experience is & i can just be done with it VS the pain&dread of eating slowly -> disgust of Everything+hyperawareness #eating tightens my muscles like i hate it so fucking much catching the food putting it in my mouth CHEWING swallowing #what a damn chore #so i always liked cheese it was my “safe food” pretty much the only thing i liked #i even hated the foods autists usually like like fries & fried chicken meatballs ETC. HATED. #i was/am more of a soup & turning all my food into varieties of Slop kind of girl nothing hard for me please... #i experienced middle school during the like ♯Thick era of the world which was honestly a good thing like for The Populace #but i felt like killing myself because i felt like an unforgivable fugly genetic failure & people did not hesitate to let me know #anyway either way i would be unhappy caus if i did gain weight during puberty i would have a meltdown about all the Changes #so i feel content for the time being about only losing the fat in my face & getting age appropriate wrinkles really #trying to enjoy the privilege of thinness while i have it because it will not last forever 0_0 but that should not matter anyway... #the privilege of thinness: being way uglier than others & constantly looking like a gibbon dying of disease + no energy or strength ever #JK people are much MUCH nicer to thin people & they do things for me on account of looking physically incapable so um yay i guess #light at the end of the tunnel that is very significant in the grand scheme of things socially. ♯CountingMyBlessings #also i was raised on ♯HAES tumblr from 2014-2018 i truly believed in that & was so damn envious i was not curvy & beautiful LOL #so i never hated overweight people really i think for the most part the SJW tumblr values stuck with me #but now i know it depends on your base frame & genetics & there is no guarantee to what you choose to do (naturally) acceptance is peace #sorry for the gigantic Arse post i just needed to get that off my chest for a long time. not on here specifically just in general #oh & i am a ♯Grignoteuse but grignoter (grazing) is different from eating in my mind&body #& my insecurity was not a result of wanting to fit in really but kind of in the sense that i wanted people to stop berating me for my looks #like body wise only & also not understanding why every other girl looked like a girl blossoming into a woman #& i looked like i was transitioning to Malnourished (unsexed) Ape made worse by bein GNC.& like the need for control later on & erthang ETC

[roboticnebula]

That episode from Brooklyn Nine-Nine when Amy first starts as sergeant and the squad points out she "has an Amy" - BUT make it Flashfam, when Wally first starts working with Bart as his kid flash

Wally: I'm a terrible Flash, I have this super eager Kid Flash who keeps running off before I can tell him what to do

Jay: Awn you got a Wally

Wally: What? no! He is not a Wally, I am nothing like Bart!

Jay: Does he keep running off mid-sentence?

Max: Impatient during fights? a bit spacey?

Jay: you have a Wally

Wally: Guys, come on, I think I would know if my Bart was a Wally

*Bart tries to fight Mirror Master on his own*

Wally: oh my God, I have a Wally

#flashfam #the flash #wally west #bart allen #jay garrick #barry allen #max mercury #and then of course the follow up to that conversation #Barry: oh so you have a W- #Wally: A Wally yes I know #Barry: Well you should have come to me I know exactly how to deal with a Wally #Wally: I don't think there is anything left to try- no matter what I do he keeps interrupting me with his own ideas #Barry: were they good ideas? #Wally: I don't know I didn't listen - oh damn #Wally: did you just solve it that easily #Barry: yes because you see managing a Wally is not a chore it's a pleasure #Wally: *shocked pikachu face

[lilyharvord]

I started reading EragonxRed QueenxFrom Blood and Ashx--oh, shit sorry.... 4th Wing today, because everyone in my reading group said I had to, and... I'm 7% of the way through and I'm already so tired. Did no one edit this book? Did no one... read this book out loud?

Me currently finishing chapter 1 and going through the 5 stages of grief because I know this whole experience is going to RUIN my reading for 2024.

Anyway, I'm writing a whole ass review that is pretty much line by line my thoughts XD If I make a google doc of it I'll let people read it. Might be more entertain than the book. 🤷🏼‍♀️ plus I'll only put like 0.1%-1/4 of it on Goodreads so think about what you might miss out on (me being upset and cranky and rutheless (((: ) Updating that doc might actually help me get through reading it faster.

#about me #fourth wing #who wants to join me on this quest??? #cause god damn if it does not feel like a fucking chore already #maybe I should just listen to the audiobook. It would probably go faster #my reading #my tbr for 2024 is exactly 12 books long #and unfortunately this and iron wing or whatever the second one is called are on there #i have never been afriad to be an anti #and I aint starting now #I dont care how dope your YA cardboard cutout male love interest is #I will rip his jugular out with my teeth if he's boring as fuck #and I will tear your “I'm so frail and weak and tiny with curves cause what else makes me a woman” MC apart #I will clean my teeth with her bones #You would think I would have learned my lesson about reading “books booktok is raving about” but no I have not #and I'm about to learn it again #like a dog that keeps pulling on the leash #(*shut up lily*) #(*lily reads fourth wing*) #new tag to follow if you are interested

[professionaljester]

love being 25 and not knowing how to socialize bc i’m autistic and off putting and cringe so no one wanted to talk to me/wanted to be my friend growing up so now i’m an adult with very few friends or ppl i talk to on a regular basis bc i never learned how to socialize or text properly bc no one taught me how

#abc shut it #vent #i’m so lonely it’s not even funny #my talking to myself has just gotten worse in the past few months alone #i just want some friends i can do watch parties with and play games with damn it #i’m so bored and lonely all the time #my life has just been work sleep and chores and it’s driving me insane bc i have nothing breaking up the routine #like it doesn’t help no one texted me bc i was poor and had didn’t get a smart phone until is was basically too late :) #like i know part of it is the depression but #idk i just don’t do anything when i get home #sometimes i do art sometimes i game but usually i just lose track of time staring at tumblr and the next thing i know my few hours— #after work are gone and i have to go to bed #like don’t get my wrong i LOVE my coworkers but i need some more friends within my own age bracket #like is it to much to ask for a group of friends that will watch anime and movies with me in our own discord server #like is that literally to much to fucking ask of the universe can i be allowed to feel like an actual normal human being that’s connected #to the human experience for once in my fuckkng life #and not feel like some sort out outlier that doesn’t fucking exist to anyone #i’m to a point where i think and feel like i’m not even real! lol #like idk i would just like there to not to be days where i literally don’t communicate with anyone #and know what to say when ppl DO text me bc when ppl do text me i half the time don’t even know what to say #and forget the message is there and get to scared to reply after too much time has passed like #i know it’s a me problem that therapy would help but im terrified that it won’t #that i’ll just be going therapy and still be a lonely autisic looser who doesn’t know how to communicate without being off putting #or being too much

[girlwithfish]

thats how i felt w my mom trying to buy movie tickets online on her phone and it took her like 20min total

#i told him im like a boomer but im not as bad as actual boomers but i am kind of slow w technology #but not that slow where im like illiterate in using a computer #but idk hdmi stuff and tv shit confuses me sometimes id make my ex set all that shit up LMFAOOO #it was so funny cuz i think he found it annoyingcuz he commented on it once saying i could help him for once #Like girlie i was doing 80% MAYBE 90% of the house chores when we lived together u can set up the damn tv and playstation tbh #Anyway w my man rn cuz hes comp sci core and also a gamer he always sets up everything when were hashtah gaming lmfaoo #or when were tryig to plau celeste together and hell tell me what to click and its confusing cuz he does like modded and also hooks up a #controller for me and all this shit idk im just clicking buttons

[yelloworangesoda]

gotta get off the internet and only interact irl with people who were 30 before they got their shit together i cant keep doing it like this

#like this being. feeling like i have no future and nobody likes me #‘youre only 19’ only goes so far when i dont know any other fail 19 year olds #im not gonna be a damn dentist for sure but like. and ive said this a thousand times. what am i gonna do. i cant live a worthless nothing #life where i work a shitty job i hate. i have to like something #i hate my art. i hate my lack of creativity. my art is so bland i just dont think its in me anymore #i finished. and i hate it #i have other hobbies. i like to cross stitch. i like to sew. i like to paint. i like to make dolls. do you see the common theme here #i have a few more than that i technically could do but i cant create anymore and it kills me. i want to. i constantly want to but i cant #it doesnt help that even if i havw ideas i dont even want to do them #i was gonna draw some characters from a game i played when i was little but i just #didnt want to. at no point did it not feel like a chore #ill try to go to new mediums! its fun to mess around and then itll feel boring again and going back doesnt feel any better #idk. googling it is useless. ive tried all the things. for years. ive been TRYING to draw consistently and like. doodles are fine theyre fu #but theyre not what i want to do i want to make something im proud of. i drew almost every single day for like 2 years #and its not burnout bc its been like. 2 more years! and ive barely wanted to at all!!! #i want to be creative and i also want people to recognize it. different complaint but it sucks so bad #i feel like nobody likes me. still. nobody cares about what i do. nobody would care if i stopped #like except me but i can only support myself so far!!!! im so tired of it!!!! someone PLEASE be here for me and just say ‘hey i love this #drawing :)’ like you have no idea what that would do for me #not always. but yknow especially if its been a while. if you like it. if you dont like it :( idk. you should tell me that too i guess #yknow so i can have some confirmation so i dont feel like im crazy. idk. dont actually id never go online again. i would probably. well. #i dont like to say the words #simons spouting #vent :(

[todayisafridaynight]

Who would be the better housewife? Mine or Daigo or Masato?

i mean. held-at-gunpoint-and-had-to-pick-one choice?? mine probably

#snap chats #like to be a housewife/househusband you typically stay at home right? none of them would like to do that #or if daigo were to do that i doubt he'd want to be running around doing chores #mine's probably the only one who can do housework though when he's up against the damn rich nepo babies #but housework isn't his fotre he'd probably be screaming to get back into financial work or just more technical work #i do giggle at the idea of househusband mine tho. just a lil bit. #only cause i know he'd be exactly like tatsu from way of the househusband #just unreasonably intense about everything but also knows what he's doing #though the more i think of it i might just be thinking of jo again.... #but anyway idk. Idk. #hard for me to imagine any of them being overly domestic yk what i mean. like a sprinkle is nice but

[oopsabird]

'liv did u go to bed when u should have' no i impulsively laid awake until dawn re-reading the last 85% of the first hunger games book for the first time in a decade on my ipad on one marathon sitting and bawling my fucking eyes out when rue died. now i'm doing laundry at daybreak and will nap for an hour before doing all my pre-holiday chores in a caffeinated marathon rush. no further questions ur honour

#probably exactly what i was up to twelve years ago too i'd wager #minus the chores and the coffee anyway #i'm sure i cried the first time when i was a teenager. but i am damn sure i cried much MUCH more this time as an adult #augh!!! #god like i hadn't quite forgotten how good thg is but i had kinda forgotten how much i deeply enjoy reading it #the worldbuilding the characters katniss's dry cutting narration it's just so. god the first movie really tries and does its best #but the films just CANNOT live up #thg #hello old tag. it's been a while

[lordsardine]

.

#okay besides for getting no chores done today except grocery shopping #i Volunteered. Cooked. Played Video Games with a Friend #Watched Succession. AND got all my shit done for my critique group #feeling pretty accomplished #miscellaneous #i also just want to edit my damn YA novel again but need to do critique edits tomorrow first #so...... i'll see what i can fit in

[rosicheeks]

Hi! I found your blog and now Im constantly horny and in love..cant stop cumming its really hard...😭🥺

You’re welcome 🤭😇

#mwahahahahahahah #my spells are working 😇 #lmao jk #but seriously it’s my hope that everyone finds my blog and goes #👀🥵🥵🥵🥵🥵 #and then follows me #and then realizes I’m actually fucking crazy #but they’re too invested now #I’m a cute face and a fat ass but damn I’m a little uhmmmmmmmmmmmmmm #idk what the word is #I’m a little? #i keep making noises and then I’m like how am I going to type it so people will know the sounds #but idk if I can #😂😂😂 #I’m just a little eeeeeeoioioioioahhhhhhhhhhhhh 🤷🏽‍♀️ #hope that makes sense #also idk where I was going with this??????? #I’ve had a long day and I’m a little stir crazyyyyy #i need to finish up a few more chores #but then I’m going to be on my snap for most of the night 😇💖 #anywayyyy focus rosie focus #thank you honey! #i hope you enjoy your stay #((also a reminder PLEASE have your age in your bio/pinned post! if I see anyone who doesn’t I instantly block them)) #ask #anon

[brush-it-gently]

Came to the house of a friend of my mom's house to celebrate the birthday of her six year old daughter and the kid and her brother are lovely, and I spent a while playing with them but the whole family screams at the kids All.The.Time.

The girl even screams just like her mom when I did something with the Legos that she didn't approve.

Holy shit this is so stressful.

#I do have some trauma related to screaming in the house but I don't think that I'm the only one who thinks this isn't normal #it's not even like. raising your voice to be heard it's full on screaming #even when the kids are literally next to them. this isnt a 'shouting so they can hear' thing this is a 'shouting to command them' #there's no obvious abuse but damn this isnt good. #also her aunt (?) kept ordering her to take things to the sink and throw out the trash right after we ate cake? #bro she's six and it's her birthday holy shit #she was laughing like it was a joke but you're making a kid repeatedly do small chores. what the fuck. #very nice people but this is too stressful.

[citricsystem-moved]

Man, being the “clean up crew” part kinda blows

When we were younger I felt a lot more efficient, and like I was actually contributing to the system’s functionality

But now whenever it goes dark and I front because everyone else is brain goop I have like…. nothing to do lol

Which is good, don’t get me wrong, being 5 years clean and finally finically stable is something we’re all really proud of. But I just feel like all I do is put the party to bed, corral hungover adults to the couch and knock out a few chores before sitting down and having my own identity crisis lol. I was literally created to pick up the pieces and now I have to have a personality?? wack

#system roles don’t really mean anything label wise #but I don’t really hear about the weird healing process of like #realizing that isn’t your whole being #maybe for some it is #but I’ve become self aware enough that it’s like #okay work is done chores are done cats are fed body is fed. what now #what do I enjoy doing? #i only became a frequent fronter (outside of crisis lol) a couple years ago #so it’s weird to like #learn to be an individual #everyone else seems really far ahead. even those who rarely front #i like the cats?? the reptiles are alright #i like driving but I don’t want to drive if I don’t have a reason to #music is good and I have a few favorite bands but like #that’s it?? damn I need hobbies or something #// #🦇 #/vent

[steelycunt]

the bank holiday monday desire to cut all my hair off…would b so healthy…so curly…

#hi people I have never and will never show my face to. should i cut all my hair off! #for context. it touches my lower back atm and it’s a fucking chore to maintain #i haven’t had it cut in years bc it’s curly so growing it back out takes extra long. i had it v short as a child and it was horrible #but like what if :// what if this time was different :// #also tho i have a long face. worried my face is not built for short hair… #sorry this post is annoying. i am just pondering… #if only i looked like kate bush. damn 😔 #(ridi's) bigmouth strikes again

[problemsynth]

Endless agony. My funkin brain meat... ough

#me when im #I wish I knew what was setting off the have depression switch #Like I am not normally miserable I have plenty to be happy and excited about #But also my brain wants me dead and ever cell in my body is filled with nondiscript guilt #And it's like over what. What am I guilty of. #What did I do. I'm just here trying my best but I can't fucking sleep eating is a damn chore #Like I'm so frustrated. I want to bite someone.

[crowlore]

i promise y’all i spend more time thinking bout the strengths of/things i like about shit than i do shit talking it but honestly i dont get the whole “the creator had a hand in it” defense of bad adaptations and reboots..like be a fan that’s fine but don’t pretend the creator is infallible and incapable of making bad creative decisions just cause overall you like their work. criticism =/= hate and people who love and hold passion for things are allowed to find flaws in them even when their criticisms don’t come with an alternative to what they got. i wish i could enjoy bad adaptations as much as their defenders can and im happy that there are fans that can still like them but im a deeply critical person and while i try to go into things with an open mind im not against walking back my optimism once ive gotten through it.

another frankly obnoxious defense i see more than id like is the “well it’s the first season; they’re never the best” sentiment bc like. be so for real with me right now…in what world are we all going into shows with the expectation that it’ll be a waste of our goddamn time and that’s fine. like be so honest with me lol..nah. im not sitting through a whole season of television just to get mad at the end..

#don’t mind me im rambling to the open air (yes im complaining about exactly what you think i am. again) #like sorry it’s just not good. and that’s Fine. but let’s not play about it #it was a boring and poorly written show with nothing characters. all style no substance. waste of time #that’s not a Crime but don’t expect me to come to bat for it beyond what it actually did well (animation and scoring) #at the end of the day im just an insanely opinionated man who likes to pick shit apart. and often that makes me like things a lil less! #but stan level fans make doing any sort of review let alone criticism such a damn chore so like why bother naming what im criticizing

[mrfoox]

Me, barely clinging on mentally: no I am, OK haha, it's not so bad you know? Yeah I'm fine

#miranda talking shit #I'm doing bad i know I am but I'm terrified to admit it it's been a year of semi-wellness and it's like no #Please I don't... Want to leave man... I know I've already left bc I can't fucking do my basic human being stuff rn #But I'm still like... Haha maybe.... It'll pass.... #I'm failing work and I don't want to... I like my work colleagues and all so I feel so guilty I can't do it en #I'm sobbing about it like damn. Let's not talk about how I'm even failing basic chores like... My home is a mess #Mismanaginng everything basic rn even and it's like haha.... Help me.... Help.... #Or I want help but it's also scary bc that feels like a failure. I've failed #I can't even say exactly what have triggered it. No we are just Unwell I guess #Negative #I feel like it's my fault. I know I can't control my... Brain in that way and depression is an illness etc but like #I was... Good for the first time since ever and then just... Gradual crash like haha.... Hello? #I feel like I've fooled people into thinking I am someone better than I actually am