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bluginkgo · 28 days

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Welp, ep7 didn't kill me! ... the depression post ep might- (Theories/Rambles)

Anyways! Ep7 oh boy, it was full of surprises even for me. The animation, the intense battle scenes, everything about it was AMAZING! Of course, that's just my opinion :3 (feel free to yeet it into the stratosphere)

Get ready for word diarrhea and some shaky and loose thoughts on the ending and what may happen next. Fair warning, my theories are pretty wacky, so somethings may sound way out there. XD

Spoilers duh, oh and gore warning? Kinda?

I mean... that scary *ss mother facking thing towards the end- you know what I'm talking about if you watched the ep 😅

This puzzled me a bit, but the more I thought about it, I suppose the more it makes sense (give me a hot minute, I'm slow ok 😅).

The lockers act as a storage container for the solver drones. But what about the image from ep6? It seemed like they had free reign over the office and could come and go. Even as far as a sentinel cuddling up to Nori. But that's the thing. Later we see that Nori and Yeva were the only ones that have been the MOST successful with the absolute solver experimentation. The others, were either corrupted or were unaffected.

That means, in the time that the patches were given to the drones experimented on, was the time that they were allowed to be in the office. But as the patches and experimentation progressed, they were moved down for more security.

Soooo V. What are my thoughts on her and her whereabouts? The shot of the hall with the sentinels did not make it into the ep. Sure, it is probably fairly easy for them to get that shot. Especially if they kept the rig of the hall, throw around some sentinel bodies, and make the light go out. But this lack of V is what's making me still believe she's out there. Delusional, I know. But we don't get to see her eldrich form. This is the Absolute Solver that has been chilling in the labs, and simply recreates the hologram of all the drones it was ever a part of.

If V does not return by ep8, then I will lay her to rest properly. Until then, I'm marking her as MIA. She may be out there, she may not.

Alright, so the crucifix is also recounted as "failsafe USB (606b)" or at least that's how I see it, given the crucifix is just one fancy usb.

Now, the other time we did see the 606 was in the beginning of ep5.

wdOS_606 is basically the code that kills the drone and its core. So, effectively, that crucifix works as a kill code for the absolute solver. The timeline of events probably happened like this: Nori was showing signs of the Absolute Solver progressing much faster than any other drone the teams have worked with. One time, Nori went Absolute Solver crazy, the placement of the image that is also seen in ep6 suggests that this was the first or one of the first times Nori went rogue. The teams then decided to contain her better and suspended her by the chains, all the while waiting for the failsafe USB to be completed. At least, that was the plan. "Don't all die and almost let it out again lol. We're pretty mad but mostly scared about that." subtitle backs it up.

Now this.

This entire sequence seems rather interesting. Absolute Solver, at its best, understands emotions on logical level. Its more like a math equation for it. As in: Bad things happen = changed and more subdued personalities. But with N, I suppose it found it rather interesting to watch him. Despite all of the bad experiences he may have had, he remained his happy self. The solver even went as far as quoting him.

That type of innocence, despite the horrors he has seen and committed, most likely amused the solver. So it allowed the team to retain those personalities and traits- also knowing that it could easily get rid of them if it really wanted to.

Uzi's administration rights still hold up. It seems that in this moment, the solver attempted to completely corrupt N and have him as a mindless drone that followed orders. Buuuut Uzi's admin rights denied that, saving him from becoming the solver's puppet and being what he was back on Earth during the massacre of humans.

Eating is often referred to in this episode. Seems that I was somewhat right in regards to the Absolute Solver being the core of Copper-9 now. It has grown rather large, and taken possession of the entire planet. To maintain that, it needs sustenance. Be it in form of biological and mechanical life, or the planet itself.

So J destroyed the only means of getting off the planet, and the possibility of saving themselves or the planets for the gang- of course there's still the pod that J is using, but that will not be given up without a fight.

The issue here I have is... to whom did J give her loyalty to? Couple theories:

To Tessa- J has NO idea this is not Tessa, and is following her old boss just like in the days of the manor.

To Absolute Solver- J knows this is not Tessa, but still is loyal to it.

Issue: If number 1 is correct, then why follow through the plan with destroying the pod? It seems that was the case all along when Tessa told J to "mind her ship." Furthermore confusing to me is her comment.

Tessa: Her (Cyn) last known act was siccing you lot on other human exo-planets.

N: But why?

J: That's what we're trying to figure out, bozo.

J's line can be taken both ways. As 1- J is actually trying to figure out why Cyn is acting up. As for 2- this was simply a cover up for the whole plot.

It seems here that the drones that were previously worked on simply stayed in their lockers and their corrupted form. But that was something that made me wonder. The drones were all corrupted with the Absolute Solver to some degree. They were all given patches of the solver- some had effect and others didn't. But that still means that there were a lot of drones that had their cores corrupted and look like Heart. Here's the question.

Why didn't they simply leave? Nori's corrupted core is fully sentient, despite being possessed by the solver the most. Of course, there is the possibility that whatever Nori created in the cathedral simply took those cores and dragged them into the center. Further growing itself. Ah, well I kind of answered my own question there.

So the largest number I could count was 129 on this list. Meaning, there were at least 129 drones experimented on. Seems to follow the crazy theory I had of the Absolute Solver taking control of the core. 129 minus 2 (Nori and Yeva) cores will definitely make a great impact/engrave itself into the planet in such a way and thus manifest the corridors of flesh and hands that go all to the way to Cabin Fevers camp ground.

It also seems that the Absolute Solver, instead of being injected straight into the drones, was done in patches. Now, my knowledge in computer language and science is non-existent, but it does make me wonder. Yeva has 2.1.8 patch, while Nori was still "in progress." This either implies:

Nori had a newer patch and this was the one that caused her to go so berserk they had to restrain her in the cathedral.

Nori did not have a new patch, the one that Yeva has was the latest one and Nori simply was not faring well in the transition.

Something I noticed/finally grasped on my 3rd watch through:

Who the hell is "they?" Well, my tired brain finally decided to kick in and work. "They" were the scientists. So the crucifix was something that the humans only now figured out how to make. The kill code that would put the Absolute Solver down. That was why the Solver was on Copper-9. It needed that crucifix, so it could get rid of it. "They kept cutting my feed." Most likely referred to when the hosts would become possessed by the solver. Just as seen with Nori, the second they went crazy, it was a quick shut down, thus cutting the feed for the Absolute Solver as it tried to figure out what they were doing.

So, just as many have theorized, Nori did cause the core collapse, but not in the way that I expected it. It's rather funny that instead of this being like a full Absolute Solver possession that caused this on purpose, was simply one bad event after another. And I love the show for this. Despite having the route that the Absolute Solver could have just imploded the planet on purpose and on its own (by possessing a host), it was instead a sequence of events that is similar to humans and their downfall. Nothing orchestrated, but just a compiling effect that created one huge problematic black hole.

So this page does give some insight. The Absolute Solver sent DDs to wipe out the other solver hosts. (I'll touch on this in a different post) And the DDs were either referred to as "pets" by the Absolute Solver (which is more likely, as it called Uzi a "puppet") or a term that Nori coined. "Puppet hosts with nerfed ___ the entity-ensures control" The nerfed ___ is most likely their cores/thought process. As in, Administration CYN is what nerfed their abilities to remember anything regarding their past, and used that to control the DDs.

This was something I couldn't kind of settle with. Events wise, it can be assumed this is all happening at the same time. Just as Uzi is getting through the mine shafts and picking up the lantern, Tessa is blowing up the computer and nomming on Doll, and N is being dragged through corpse walls and being saved by Heart.

It was Doll- Although, the more I looked at this thought, the less likely this became. Doll's was intact when she came to warn Uzi, and stayed there until Tessa entity ate it towards the end of the episode. We have yet to see an instance where a core entered the Absolute Solver form and returned back to the core form without taking any damage. Specifically in J's case, the solver form was blown up and only then returned to the core form. Nothing was in the mine shafts that could have possibly injured it enough to go back to the core form and sneak back into Doll's body.

Tessa...uhh whatever the fack she is- Based off of Doll's getting attacked scene, the entity seems to have a rather quick ability in switching forms. So I wouldn't put past it that the entity attacked Doll, saw that another part of the Absolute Solver was trying to chase N down, and just went along with the rest of the solver to hunt him down.

On my first watch through, I was worried that N would go crazy from breaking rule 1 of robotics: Not to injure humans. Granted, in the first watch through, everything went so fast that I barely had any time to grasp anything. After the second watch through, it becomes quite clear and apparent. The Absolute Solver took the rules of robotics out of the DDs. I mean, how else were they supposed to attack and kill the humans back on Earth. Furthermore, Tessa was not a human. So even if N did still have the rules of robotics programmed into him, they might not have set off. Why the "might not?" Because of the sentinel. Perhaps because the sentinels were created by humans, their ai is much simpler, but when that dingo bit Tessa, it had an aneurysm. It detected blood, and thus, the ai deduced that the sentinel just injured a human and decided to alt f4 itself. Would the same happen with N? I'm not quite sure. Given that the solver programmed the DDs, it could be either instance: Take the rules out completely or enhance the rules so that blood isn't what triggers the rule breaking.

This is something that made me wonder. Did the DD trio go to any other exo-planets previously? I took this scene in two ways:

This has happened before. The solver knows that N will continue to forgive the Absolute Solver because something similar has happened before. As in, the solver is out to kill a planet, it does that, but in return sacrifices any DDs that might have been there to get rid of the potential solver hosts. The backups are booted and sent to a new planet.

This is the first time this happened, but the solver has previous experiences. Just as the solver had made N forget about his time in the mansion and the bloodbath of killing humans, it can do the same thing. Kill N, and make his backup version forget this ever happened.

This one single frame made me wonder a bit too hard. The little nulls I assumed to be miniature and contained blackholes. But then when N dove under one... there was collision? A black hole, as far as I understand (which isn't very much ;w;), is something that cannot be touched. It warps time and space, so how are you supposed to be able to touch it? But I'm quite sure my tired brain is just thinking too much about simple details.

For some odd reason, I always thought that the solver wings were more flesh, and thus couldn't take too much damage. Proven wrong again! Uzi withstood N's firing and her wings came out undamaged.

Main question for me: Why would the Absolute Solver eat the core? Specifically in drone form/possessing a host. If it was the hole that's in the cathedral, I can understand that somewhat better. But what does a solver drone gain from eating another corrupted core?

Perhaps acts as a power boost? Whatever the corrupted core can do, the powers are transfered uhh... somehow?

Simply sustenance, and a way to get rid of Heart, you're thinking too deep into this Ginkgo (more likely option) Plus, backed up by Tessa entity eating Doll's core and being unaffected. Perhaps it just remains in the body as a source of energy.

IC-0n IS THAT YOU?! XD But in all seriousness, this scene was intense. The animation, the music and sound effects, the lines, everything was executed perfectly and created the monstrosity that may or may not haunt my nightmare tonight :3

My first thought was, "OH YOU! YOU FINALLY SHOWED UP! ...... GO AWAY!" This entity... uh I'm not quite sure what to call it yet, has been teased all the way back to the poster. And I would like to bring back something I said a bit while back. "What if the double x'ed character is someone we already know... but is dead? A character that is confirmed/somewhat confirmed to be dead can return back to life, and their body forced to move by the absolute solver." (I will be delving deeper into debunking this in another post.) Welp, that does it. I had the idea, just didn't know who the fack it was. XD So we get a drone, wearing Tessa's skin.

In hindsight, there was a big fat foreshadowing that I took for granted. This thing.

The drone body is a WD, and clear as day 1001 written on the core. What does it mean? Ah well, I'm actually not too sure. Going with the 002, 048, 029, etc. numbers, I can only assume 1001 is something the Absolute Solver made and gave it that number, possibly suggesting that there is more of these monstrosities out there.

So. Another "sacrifice." Why the quotation marks? Well... the first "sacrifice" was V and I'm still calling her MIA. Ginkgo, its clearly shown Uzi is most likely not gonna make it out of this one- shhhhhhhh, there is no war in Ba Sing Se. I will call Uzi MIA as well.

She's dead. The core was charging up behind her, much like it did when Nori's null hand fell, and when IC-0n- I MEAN- Tessa? The entity, jumped in. Uzi might just be the thing that sets the next core collapse- even the planet collapse- off. What Uzi is seeing, is just something that the Absolute Solver might have conjured up as her last memories before the imminent shut down.

She isn't dead. You see, this entire shot has me puzzled (nothing new lol). Your evidence for this one Ginkgo? Two images.

These scenes might not be much, but I will try to grasp at air here. It's unclear where Heart goes to. I mean there are two routes, one of which sounds more likely. First, she's going into the core because it connects to the entirety of the mine shafts and the core. Second, she's gonna use a door off to the side to go to the mine shafts and the same place that N gets dragged through. Why am I using these as poor evidence? Well, we've had 2 characters enter dark spaces full fo solver flesh and still make it out. Ginkgo, Uzi is literally falling in that scene, there is nothing to stop her fall. Yeah I know, like I said, I'm grasping at air with this one. Buuuut, the mind scape theories sound more fun, promise! ^w^

First off, where the HELL could this possibly be?

A memory/mind scape the Absolute Solver created: This has to be Copper-9, based off of the two iconic moons to the top right. A memory, because this could be either the first core collapse, or Uzi viewing the destruction of Copper-9 from another solver entity's point of view. Mind scape as in this is where the solver drone minds go to. Every solver drone that has been consumed by the large Absolute Solver in the cathedral, had their own personalities and thoughts. To keep them all from clashing and acting out, perhaps the solver takes the hive-mind plane and creates spaces that the solver drones can warp through.

The "ascension" plane: Ginkgo, that's it, to the hospital you go chop chop. /j Anyways, why am I even bringing something like this up? Well, Uzi's mural says this.

There are two routes here: succumb to be the host of eternal entity, or ascend. Ascend to... where? And how? Here is where the more intense crack theories enter (or at least for me). This space is the hive-mind of the solver, yes, but this is where Uzi's internal battle against the Absolute Solver will happen. We all know that the last mural will be of N fighting off the Absolute Solver (most likely). But what if he had outside (inside technically?) help. While N may hold out against the solver, he may need help to finally break through and finish it off. Who would be a better candidate than Uzi? She has now, for better or worse, become part of the large amalgamation that sits in the core. Perhaps with the strongest hosts in the hive-mind: Uzi, Nori, Yeva (maybe, I'm not quite settled on her yet), and Cyn, they will all be able to stop the solver for good on Copper-9. This process is the ascension. Instead of succumbing to the Absolute Solver within the hive-mind scape, she will fight once again. This time around, coming out victorious and ascending to uhh... I'm not quite sure yet? Robo-heaven? Returning back into her corporal body? Becoming the next Absolute Solver but with less need to rule the world? (Ah, well she might still actually rule the world just for the fun of it XD) Honestly, it's far too late for me to be thinking any more. I might add on to this later on.

Is it a rather optimistic take on the ending? Perhaps, but I need a little optimism right about now. ;w;

Want more of my stupid rambles? This has 3 other parts! ;w;

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haveyouseenthisskeleton · 2 months

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No gonna lie. Your writing is good asf but you're French too?!I'm so happy to see that I'm not the only French speaking writer who writes in English and the fact that it's undertale too? Amazing !

Can I request the main 10 boys and how they would react to a crybaby s/o ? Like not in a bad way? The reader is just really sensitive. If they cry of laughter, they're actually sobbing, angry? Sobbing, happy? Sobbing. Scared?Sobbing.

And well, all of this crying is very exhausting for s/o

If possible, female gendered, but I don't really care, so it's up to you

Thanks if you do, and whether you do or don't, I hope you have a great day/night and that you're safe!

Yeah, we're not a lot of French people in the fandom, but we're very persistent!

Undertale Sans - He never had someone literally sobbing at his puns before so he was a bit surprised at first. Now he's just used to it. He's carrying tissues with him all the time in case there's an emergency. He still can't get over the fact one single pun can kill you though. It's both sad and hilarious, he could never stop bothering you.

Undertale Papyrus - He learned to discern the happy sobs from the sad sobs now. He showed you his notebooks with an exact study of how he differentiates them and he's very proud of it. You think it's so awkward but Papyrus just pats you on the shoulder and tells you that's alright because you can't hide anything from him anyway. He smiles, then leaves. Uh. Well, that was scary.

Underswap Sans - He's probably not the best match. Blue is not that good with people crying. He tends to hide his feelings a lot, and that's because he has a cold head he's a wonderful police officer. He's very awkward when you randomly start to cry and it's stressing him out because he's never sure if he said something wrong or not.

Underswap Papyrus - Welp. The thing with Honey is that he is super super empathetic. This means that whenever you cry, he cries as well lol. It leads to super awkward moments when you try to stop crying but Honey cries so you cry again, and then Honey cries again and it's a never-ending circle. You can't help it.

Underfell Sans - The poor guy already struggles to understand human emotions in the first place, but now he is just so confused. Crying is for sad, but now crying is for literally all the other feelings? How the hell is he supposed to make a difference? Can't you just stick a post-it on your head stating your current mood and if he messed up or not? He can't tell, it's driving him crazy!

Underfell Papyrus - The military school taught him that crying means you're really hurt and on the verge of dying. Now everytime you cries, he comes running in a hurry, completely panicking, and gets so confused when you're actually crying but laughing at the same time??? Are you mocking him? Are you broken? Why can't you use the crying thing like in his books? Humans are so complicated for no reason, it's so frustrating! When you said the book might be lying to him, he's flabbergasted.

Horrortale Sans - He doesn't care what you're crying for. He quickly understood that you crying means he gets free cuddles. You kinda accidentally trained him to come running to you for """comfort""" whenever you're crying. He loves it when you're crying. Please cry more and pet him.

Horrortale Papyrus - He's exactly like you. It's like looking into a mirror. He thinks it's so awkward when you both start crying at the same time. He tries to stop, but he really can't help it. That's problematic when there are people around who are trying to help you two but you're actually dying of laughter. People are so confused.

Swapfell Sans - He's Mr. Poker Face, and he became an expert in reading you so he can translate your feelings to the people around you when you can't talk anymore. He makes it so awkward though, saying to random people you're crying because you saw a cute kitten and can't get over it and that he is in fact not mistreating you. At least he tries to help.

Swapfell Papyrus - Sorry he can't read your feelings right and thinks everything is a joke, even when you're mad at him. He's so confused when you starts to scream at him because actually it's not funny. Usually, he makes himself very little for a few hours after that. Sorry, no one taught him to read the signs, he kinda does his best.

Fellswap Gold Sans - He rolls his eyes at you every time you start to cry lol. Yeah, he still thinks crying is for weak people and he can't really understand why you're so emotive. It's even worse when you're crying affects Coffee and then he has two people he needs to awkwardly comfort by patting their head. Please, stop.

Fellswap Gold Papyrus - Another one too empathetic that will start to sniff whenever you start to cry and then burst into tears in your arms for no reason. At least he gives good hugs with all the crying, so it's a bonus point.

#undertale #underswap #underfell #horrortale #swapfell #fellswap gold #sans #papyrus #undertale ask blog #undertale asks #undertale imagines #undertale headcanons

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onewmin · 8 months

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the perfume on the shelf. pt. 11 | bangchan

Pairings: Bang Chan x Fem!reader, Kim Yugyeom x Fem!reader

Summary: Falling in love with your best friend was never a part of the plan. So you end it up. But does he want to put a stop to it, too?

Warnings: AU, mentions of verbal and physical abuse, descriptions of a toxic relationship, mentions of s*icidal thoughts, profanity, descritpion of a fire, the reader loves her cat very much, another day of the reader and Chan being annoying (the latter especially), jealousy, the reader is going through major changes (good for her), another bunch of Taylor Swift references, the reader has yet another traumatic experience; typos

In the parts with the cat it's very much self-inserted. Shout out to my cat and all other kitties and doggies <3

'Dal' stands for 'moon' :)

Word count: 5411

Author’s note: welp, there's a lot to read lol. Idk why this whole work lacks happy moments so much, I'm trying my best to make it more positive, but in the end... We get this lol. Still, hope you enjoy another part! I'll try posting part 12 in a couple of weeks, but, as my summer vacation is over, I'll have a lot of work to do, so I cannot promise you an exact date. Again, thank you fro reading and supporting 'the perfume on the shelf' and enjoy the ride! (put ya seatbelts on)

Disclaimer: the names and appearances of real people are used for inspiration and writing purposes only. I do not claim anything, everything belongs to its owners.

Part 10 | Part 12

Another day to cry in the bathroom of your therapist’s office.

Wiping your red cheeks, you took a deep breath in, trying to calm this sudden outburst of pain down. Talking about your unsuccessful attempt to go back together with Chan resurfaced in something deep, something that has affected you too much to even be able to handle it on your own. Your fear of rejection has finally become real - and instead of feeling calm after so many years of being scared of it, you found yourself utterly broken.

As long as you could remember yourself, this fear of being rejected has pressured you into staying out of the picture, of never saying what you truly feel. You were shaking at the thought of confessing to Yugyeom, when you were a teenager; your breath was hitched in your throat when you decided to join that writing club at university; the idea of asking anybody out made you sick to your stomach. And finally, all the mess with Chan was partially launched by your inability to ask direct questions, to come clean eventually. However, your initial choice was to live a lie, to let yourself have dust thrown into your eyes, to rather have smoke and mirrors than an honest relationship. What does this say about you?

“I don’t know”, you muttered, looking at the reflection in the mirror. “I don’t know”, you repeated, sniffing and exhaling once again. When you were nineteen, everything seemed so easy. When you were nineteen, you seemed to know everything.

“What would nineteen-year old you say about this whole situation?” Your therapist’s question was left unanswered, rather as introspection for the next two weeks. What would she say, really? That’s a walk in the park for her.

“Dump his ass”, the advice you used to give all of your girlfriends popped up in your head. “Find a new hobby, work more, go out more - do anything to forget him. He’s not worth your tears and time”. Easier said than done.

You sighed once again, before collecting your lip gloss back into your purse. It’s time to go home and prepare for going out; even though you try following your own advice, the thought of Chan is a lingering memory, a signature left right on your forever restless brain.

Running up the stairs on your subway station, you checked your messages to find Yugyeom and Eunjoo discussing art in the chat. Two weeks ago, after the airport incident, when Yugyeom was dropping you off at your apartment complex (the conversation with your parents about your early departure from the countryside was guided by Gyeom perfectly), Eunjoo caught the sight of the two of you while she was waiting for her best friend on the bench. For some reason she decided it would be a great idea to start going on ‘double dates’ - although, you could barely call them dates at all. She was unsure about her relationship with Minho, so she needed you to check up on him. You didn’t want to be the third wheel, so… So she invited Yugyeom. And now the four of you had a group chat. Was it a nightmare? Absolutely. You found out what nerds Gyeom and Eunjoo were; discussing everything - even rocket science, are you kidding me? - while you and Minho intervened in their intellectual conversations with memes and ridiculous videos to watch. For instance, when you sent a Tarot reading video, just for shits and giggles, just to send a follow up message, “This woman said I’m gonna have a billionaire husband in a couple of months” - only to get bashed by two absolute smartasses for your silly little hobby, as they threw in their pieces of mind on how Tarot is a scam, and it doesn’t work, and people like that woman are a fraud - et cetera, et cetera, blah-blah-blah. Minho, on the other hand, was pretty supportive (and a pain in the ass for Eunjoo and Yugyeom) when he sent in ten more videos of that same creator, chiming in with his comments about toxicity. Yeah, this chat was a shit show; however, it was bringing you too much joy to hate it.

In your apartment your cat greeted you with irritated meows and sweet purrs when you took her in your arms as if she was a baby. “Mama’s sorry, Gaeul”, you said, kissing her in between ears, “but I promise I’ll be back sooner than later. Just a couple of hours, okay?” She started gently biting your hand as you tried to scratch her tummy. “And you get to be the boss of the house. Not just for a few hours”, you kissed her nose and she put her paw on your cheek, “but forever, Gaeul”. She jumped from your arms as soon as you heard a loud stomp and a screeching curse - ugh, your neighbours were fighting again. How could a family that looks picture perfect hate each other so much? Well, you knew the answer to the question, but still, it never failed to arise every time you heard these two fight.

“You’re a piece of shit, Hajoon!” You sighed as you heard the man’s voice. “A piece of shit wife and mother!” This was the unfortunate reality-TV-turned-real-life program you had to listen to; the walls were rather thin not to hear them constantly fight over stupidest things in front of their little girls. When you saw the two of them ride their bikes and laugh, you always wondered, how they managed not to lose their innocence yet - with parents like theirs, who trapped themselves in a toxic marriage, the innocence of a child being saved was a miracle.

The drama continued as the woman cried out harsher curses, accusing her husband of cheating. Is that the life that awaits everyone in a marriage? Is that the life you’re going to have too? That’s what your parents have; constant fights, verbal abuse, toxic apologies with flowers and luxury candy, and no words uttered. No resolution of those conflicts, no rethinking of the life choices they’d made to get to this point of no return. Nothing. And this family, a family so similar to yours, was the same. Only the girls were lucky to have each other and not to be alone. However, calling the kids ‘lucky’ for lulling each other when their parents scream all types of insults, calling the children they created with ‘so much love and affection’, as the mother posted on her stories, ‘mistakes’ when they were in another room - calling them ‘lucky’ was a direct insult.

Accompanied by curses coming from a wall away from your living room, Gaeul was circling around you the whole time you were collecting your things. When you looked at the wrist watch, it was already ten minutes past the time you should have left the house. “Shit”, you mumbled, rapidly taking the bag in your hands and giving Gaeul a couple of more scratches, while she was meowing and standing in front of the door. “I’ll see you in a couple of hours, sweetie”.

You were supposed to be drinking as the four of you were going for some type of party one of Minho’s friends was throwing - so taking the car wasn’t an option; you didn’t know much about Changbin, but you were willing to get out of your shell and meet new people. “Maybe you’ll finally find a boyfriend there”, your mom told you over the phone, “you’ll be thirty soon - not really soon, though - and your father and I are waiting for grandkids. Your cousin is already a mother”. Ugh, yeah, whatever. Some nonsense that your mother confidently states is out of this world sometimes.

Running up to a bus stop, you conveniently saw your bus pull up; jumping in it, you paid for the ticket and sat down on one of the many empty places, staring out of the window. As the music took you to another dimension, your thoughts flew by, pictures of your mother nagging you about the prospect of marriage, Chan putting his arm over Micha’s shoulder, Gyeom stuffing his mouth with a sandwich in one bite, Eunjoo and Minho holding hands ran in your mind with a uncontrollably rapid speed. You were thinking about Chan less each day, the images of him being replaced by your friends, new people you met and surprising revelations you made about this world and, first of all, yourself.

Every bus ride that lasted more than twenty minutes - just like this one - got you hooked on rethinking and reflecting on every little thing that had ever happened to you. Sometimes it would be sappy, rainy autumn day like memories: Chan holding your hand while driving, bringing it to his lips to leave a small kiss on your knuckles every time the car stopped at the red light; you and him lying in bed, face to face, heart to heart, having those rare sincere conversations, filled with laughs and kisses. Whereas sometimes you’d lose yourself to cheerful moments, those July bright yellow afternoon days memories, with Yugyeom watching you chase after his golden retriever Dal; with you watching some happy kids fly kites while on a picnic with Eunjoo; with you writing your earliest stories in your old diary, sitting behind the desk in you sunlit childhood bedroom. The happiest that you were, in all of those memories you couldn’t even find the ghost of Chan; as if he had never existed in the most joyful moments of your life. As if - no, no ‘if’s’ - he had only brought you pain, and tears, and gut wrenching disgust towards your own self, towards the little girl, singing along the radio songs in her parents’ car, towards the fifteen year old girl, who wrote her stories on her old laptop and squealed after getting her first likes on the web, towards the woman you’d become. The woman who made stupid mistakes one after another, noticing but not seeing the pattern she had with every lover of hers, not seeing Chan being the same guy like the rest of them in her history. The woman you’d become, the woman you’re still thriving to be - she doesn’t deserve the slander you put her through.

There might have been happiness during him - his jokes, warm hugs, car rides to his parents’ country house, him playing with Gaeul, his voice, his soft curls, his late love confessions. But there would certainly be more happiness after him, after this whole mess you yourself created. No acid rains burning your cheeks anymore, no scratching yourself so much you start bleeding anymore, no gray colors during the brightest sunny summer mornings. Is this what the phase of acceptance looks like? Is this where you stop blaming Chan for the pain he caused you? Nah, you’re not there yet. But close. Definitely close.

Receiving another text in the group chat, your thoughts suddenly led you to the anxious search for your ID in the handbag of yours. “Shit, shit, shit”, you muttered under your breath, when you realized it was nowhere to be found. Did you lose it on your way to the bus stop? Or did you lose it here? Oh no. You rolled your eyes at the clear memory of seeing it on the kitchen counter before you rushed out of the apartment. How could you be so irresponsible? You’d never forgotten your ID, ever in your life, even taking it to the convenience store at 7AM to get a snack on your day off. And now, when you clearly needed it to get in the club, you’d left it at home? Super responsible, girl, just awesome.

Having jumped off the bus at the nearest stop, you caught yourself feeling absolutely shameless about the fact of being late. After you moved almost to the outskirts of the city, not being on time has become your signature mark. Now you were texting your friends, explaining the whole situation, while getting in an Uber - just to shorten the forty minutes you’d already spent on the bus to twenty-five. And as the car started off, your friends couldn’t leave you alone.

“Gyeom, I’m sorry”. The first words you said to him after picking up, annoyance recognizable in your voice. Yeah, you were the one being late, but Mr. Punctuality didn’t have to remind you about it as well.

“I’m actually late too”, he let out a breathy chuckle. What? Kim Yugyeom coming late?

“What happened?”

“Nothing”, he sighed, “I just spent too much time on the phone with my dad”. You hummed in response. “I can pick you up, by the way”, Yugyeom added.

“You don’t have to”.

“Ah, it’s not like I’m goin’ to be on time anyway”. The yippy notes in his voice made you reflect the smile he was probably wearing on his face. “So it’s not a problem, really”.

“Thanks, Gyeom”.

“I’ll be at your place in, uh, around ten minutes”. As you ended the conversation, you heard the siren sounds in the distance. It wasn’t an unordinary occasion: the song of the sirens was playing almost an unstoppable tune every minute of the day, as the ambulances were rushing through the busy streets, or the firemen were driving to stop the fires. It was not unusual for a city like Seoul; however, the closer you were getting to your apartment complex, the more the clump of fear inside your chest grew.

The first thing you saw when the car turned to your building was the blinding light of the fire truck. Then it was the group of firemen. After it was the crowd, surrounding the fire engine. The last thing was the smoke coming out of the apartment on the fifth floor. From the apartment right next to yours.

Jumping off the car, you rushed through the crowd, forcibly pushing apart the nosy neighbors and bystanders, only to be stopped by a firefighter. You couldn’t think of anything else, of other people, of the party you were late to, of the things in your apartment - the only image in your head was of Gaeul. How scared she must be, how she’s probably sitting in the corner of your room, far away from the strange and dangerous smell. The clouded vision of yours, the tears in your eyes were invisible to you. The only thing you needed was to get your baby out of there.

“Miss, you cannot go in there”, the voice of the firemen echoed in your ears.

“My cat’s in there”, you mumbled, but he heard you, “I need to get her out. It’s an apartment right next to that that’s burning”.

“We’ll get her out, no need to worry”. The calm notes in his voice had awoken some primal rage in you - how could he even say that? You couldn’t not worry, for fuck’s sake!

You quickly disappeared in the crowd so that the firefighter wouldn't recognise you if something was about to happen. There was an emergency exit, but they were probably evacuating people through it, right? What should you do to get in?

As the thoughts were rapidly running through your head, you saw smoke coming from another window. Your window now. Your heart sank; everything around started spinning slowly and you grabbed your chest in order to calm yourself down - at least, a little bit, at least, before you took Gaeul in your arms.

Fuck it. You hastened your steps through the crowd, away from the main entrance, in hopes to get lost amidst those being evacuated, in hopes to get through the emergency exit without being caught. In the inner yard of your building your restless, teary eyes noticed one fireman guarding the entrance; and over there, on the bench was your neighbour from the fourth floor, a fourteen year old, holding her brown dog close to her heart.

“Hello?” She picked up her phone, the shaky voice of hers bringing more blood to your already jolting heart. How smart it was to exchange numbers with her all those months ago.

“Could you distract that firefighter for me, please?” You uttered, while looking at her. She turned her head and found your eyes. “My cat’s still in there. I can’t… I can’t wait till they save her. Please”. The girl nodded and quickly rose up to her feet, probably coming up with an idea of taking the fireman’s attention.

She ran up to the man, still holding the dog in her arms, and started rambling something loudly, the hysteric condition of hers being the direct result of this horrible evening. “What was she up to?” You thought to yourself as you moved from a tree to a tree as fast as you could. “Was she walking her dog when the fire started? Was she at home?”

How convenient it was to have a bunch of trees to grow in the inner yard of the apartment building. “I should thank the managing lady after it”, you watched as the firefighter turned his back to the entrance - now. The adrenaline in your stomach felt like a fuel to the fire of anxiety and fear; as you leapt up the stairs, two, three steps missed, your heart was pumping somewhere in your throat, bringing the inevitable, horrible thoughts to your brain. You brushed them off before you reached your floor, running in the corridor, which was filled with smoke, with an empty head. The door to your apartment was being broken down as you ran up to it, right on time - maybe, the first time you were not late in the last couple of years. The firefighters weren’t pleased a resident was out in the dangerous area, but you quickly opened the door - having promised you’d let them in without getting inside yourself - breaking the recently made promise immediately when the lock was open, dropping the keys to the ground. If the building management had fixed the electronic locks on time, maybe the whole building wouldn’t have to use keys; maybe, the fire issue would have been resolved earlier, had the firemen had an easier access to the apartments.

Gray. Choking color gray - that's what your apartment was. You could get suffocated in here just for breathing in the smoke, but was it even a priority? You would die but get Gaeul out of this place.

“Gaeul!” Your voice came out quaking, eyes getting watery with every step you took. “Gaeul, baby!” Almost flying into your bedroom, you noticed her scratching the window in hopeless attempts to get out. “Baby, you’re safe”, you whispered, swooping her in your arms. She let out a weak meow as you covered her chubby face with a palm of your hand. The firefighter was quick to escort you from the apartment, having thrown a blanket from the couch over your shoulders. You wrapped Gaeul in it when you got to the hall; she was meowing as you ran down the stairs, telling you how scared she was. “I know, honey, I know”, you kept on repeating, “you’re safe now”.

The fresh air hit both of your faces abruptly, making you gasp and cough. Holding Gaeul as close to your heart as it was possible - perhaps, if you squeezed her tighter, she would be inserted in your heart directly - you sat down on the grass next to the girl with a dog sleeping on her lap.

“Is she okay?” You nodded, leaving a kiss between Gaeul’s brown ears. She started purring, exuding that velvety purring of hers that signaled of her finally feeling safe. After finding her in a pouring rain, as her dirty little paws left marks on your white hoodie and her squeaky voice notified you she wasn’t pleased with being carried by some stranger, after washing her up and taking her to the vet, after making sure she felt comfortable in every corner of any of the places where you lived, after teaching her to use the litter box, after buying her the most expensive and delicious food she liked, after having her sleep in between your legs every night since the first one she spent with you, after building up your whole life around her when you needed someone to give your unconditional love to, after having no suicidal thoughts the moment she took a step in your apartment, after having her as the only living creature who loved you unlimitedly - how could you sit and wait till they save her? How could you leave her little figure in the hands of fate?

“Mr. Choi set his apartment on fire”, the girl said while petting her dog. “That’s entirely his fault”.

“Tell me about it”, you mumbled.

“Why didn't the police do anything when they were called on them last week?” She questioned. “He literally threatened to burn the house down”. You shrugged your shoulders. No one really did anything when he threatened to jump off the window, no one took his threats seriously when he promised to burn the apartment if his wife got on his nerves again. Yeah, like it’s a reasonable excuse for a possible homicide. What a scumbag.

“He ran away though”. She sighed. “But they’ll find him in no time, I guess. Mrs. Choi said he broke his wrist trying to hit her, so he won’t be far away”. You nodded absentmindedly, eyes still focused on Gaeul. She already seemed peaceful, only her yellowish eyes still being completely overtaken by the dilated pupils. She was lying on your legs, covered by that blanket. “Isn’t it your phone buzzing?”

Oh, that was the annoying feeling in the pocket of your jeans. “Hello”. You responded in a monotonous voice.

“Where are you?” Yugyeom sounded panicked. “I’ve been calling you for the past ten minutes! Are you okay? Where are you?” He repeated. After muttering a few words you hung up, putting the phone on the grass. The autumn nights started to get chilly; but you were willing to stay seated on the cold ground as long as it took for Gaeul to fully calm down.

In mere seconds Yugyeom appeared in the inner yard, dashing to you. “Are you okay?” He observed you carefully, and then the gaze of his fell to Gaeul, curled up on your lap. “Are you okay, sweetling?”

“She ran into the building to save her cat”, your neighbor proudly proclaimed. Yugyeom gave a look - not the ‘Are you crazy?’ or ‘You’re insane’ one, but the look, striking as… Worry? Pain? Hurt? Love?

“I think the two of you need some warming up”. His soft voice impinged upon your indifference to everything but Gaeul; it seemed as if the part of you that was scared started to heal as soon as he helped you get on your feet. For the first time in the last half an hour you shivered under the cool wind, and Yugyeom took his zipper hoodie off to put it on your shoulders.

“You’re wearing a T-shirt”. You stated, looking at him. He gave you a small smile and shrugged his shoulders.

“I like the cold. I’m like Johnny Storm, y’know that”. You let out a breathy laugh - the first one after pulling up to the building. Your cat was already napping in your arms - the safest place for her, as it turned out - so you and Yugyeom slowly moved to his car.

The windows of your neighbors had ruined the whole front of the building - now the gaze of any person would fall on black frames around them. “I wonder if my landlady is here”. You said, when getting on the passenger seat.

“D’you want me to find her?”

“Gyeom, no”, you answered in a soft voice, ‘you’ve already done enough”. His brows knitted as he looked at you with utter confusion written all over his face.

“I didn’t do anything except for panicking and calling Minho and Eunjoo”, he noted, “and not like it’s hard to help you. Especially now”.

You gave in rather quickly. “Alright”.

“Give me her number, so I-”

“Just take my phone”, you shoved the device in his hands, “she doesn’t pick up if she doesn’t know the number”. He nodded before getting out of the car.

And as you were petting your sleepy cat, you felt the tears being finally let go from your eyes. Gaeul woke up when the salty drops fell on her side and, after staring at you for a couple seconds, started to licking herself up. You laughed through the choking tears and caressed her head and back, thinking how much your life had changed since the moment she magically appeared in it. It became… Brighter, funnier, sweeter. Even when she would wake you up at three AM ‘cause she was hungry; or when she would try to eat the yarn whenever you crocheted; or when she would sit on the kitchen counter while you were cooking. The thought of losing her made your heart hurt even more than it already was.

“We’ll be fine, right, baby?” You murmured when she started snoring quietly; you turned your head to look out of the window and noticed Gyeom in the distance, still talking with someone over the phone. A strange feeling of being absolutely safe around him had arisen in your chest the moment you saw his worried face tonight; maybe you shouldn’t push him away too hard - he’s one of the few people you can trust, after all.

Gyeom was right; he cannot certainly save you like he used to when you were kids. You can come up with a rescue plan yourself, like today, when you couldn’t wait for anyone else to save the most loved part of you. Anyone but you. Gyeom cannot save you; but he can give you the sense of comfort after you help yourself get back to life.

“Gaeul”, you muttered, “how long it’s been since we called him ‘Gyeom’?” A short version of his name, and he hated being called that. But when it came to you, his first love? He blushed whenever you said ‘Gyeom’. And why did you start calling him that again? Maybe that’s a sign, you thought to yourself, leaning your head back, maybe I do need him around.

“So you mean to tell me”, Jisung was talking with his mouth full, “that you and Micha are not together? What’s the point of bringing her here then?”

Chan let out a deep sigh. It was only a matter of time when Han found out. “We are together. But we just don’t like labeling it as a ‘relationship’ Just give us some more time”.

“ Are you kiddin’ me? It’s been two weeks, Chan!” He gnashed his teeth. “Every media outlet is calling me to confirm whether the two of you are together. What am I supposed to tell them?”

“That it’s none of their business”.

“It doesn't work anymore. Is she your girlfriend or not?”

“She is, technically”, Chris leaned in his chair, “we’re in an open relationship”. Jisung set his palms down flat on the table, the heavy breathing of his sending shivers down Chan’s spine. He loved riling his friend up, but sometimes he seemed to forget Han was also his manager. A scary one at times.

“I swear to God”, Jisung hissed, “I’m gonna kill you and replace you with another dude. No one will see a difference”. Chris chuckled and went back to his dinner, leaving Han’s question unanswered.

Him and Micha had a lot of history; but when he showed up at her door, drunk to the bone, she was more than shocked. He kept on complaining, crying about you, cursing you, proclaiming his love for you. Micha was impressed only by him being that emotional - nothing like that ever happened when they were together. A couple of days later one thing led to another and… Some time after that she was already packing her bags to go to Melbourne with him. Was it a smart, calculated decision? Absolutely not. But Chan, for whatever reason, promised to support her financially before she’d find a job there; alright, to be honest? He wanted to hurt you. To hurt you the same way your reconciliation with Yugyeom made him feel. Chan wanted to see you suffer as much as he did, to see you try to beg for him to come back to you. Spoiler alert: you never did.

Except for the airport incident. He almost caught the slightest glimpse of you, almost canceled his entire flight, almost called off all the business he had in Australia. If only he could delve into your features one more time, he would’ve put everyone aside. ‘Cause if you were there and he saw you, he wouldn’t need anything else. But he didn’t see you, so it was all settled as it was supposed to be.

Han was grumbling something under his breath while Chan was scrolling down the latest news; some of his friends had a comeback coming up, the other was starring in a new drama, the third proposed to his girlfriend… Everyone seemed to have their life put together but him. When he laid in bed, staring at the ceiling, Micha’s head resting on his arm, Chan would only think about a life he gave away. He could’ve been lying in his bed now, with his head snuggled into your neck, inhaling that sweet scent of yours right into his system. He could’ve been waking up to your leg lapped across his. He could’ve been with the woman he’s in love with, not the one he pretends to love. Micha doesn’t deserve this; but something tells him that she knows - just pretends not to notice.

‘Hey, doesn’t this house seem familiar to you?” Han shoved his phone right into Chan’s face; when his eyes could finally focus, he recognised the building immediately. “They report it’s been a fire, they’re still locating it”, Jisung continued, “and the guy who started it wanted to kill his family. What a piece of shit”.

The only thing Chan could see was smoke coming out from the apartment scarily close to yours. He was unable to forget the window of yours, the window he would always look up to just to see your smiley face. “Can I borrow your phone?”

Jisung swallowed his food, looking confused. “What for?”

“I need to call her”. Han rolled his eyes but obliged, lending the phone to his friend. Chan practically jumped from his seat, running from the second floor of the restaurant they were in to the street. Chan was aware of you blocking him everywhere; so he hoped you’d pick up if Han called. What was that logic? Why would you even pick up?

If the fire was still being located, how big is it? Were you home when it started? Were you not? Is Gaeul okay?

Long beeps only fueled his anxiety. Pick up, pick up, pick up. Please.

“Hello?” The voice on the other side of the phone wasn’t the silky one Chan was hoping to hear.

Chan asked for your name. Was it a cop? A firefighter? A doctor? “She’s okay, she wasn’t home when the fire broke out”.

“Who am I talkin’ to?”

“Kim Yugyeom. I’m a friend. You?”

Another tingling in his chest, every little blood cell of his running to his head, fueling his rage and pain, mixing them altogether. So, Yugyeom is there? After all of your claims he meant nothing to you?

“Hello?” Yugyeom asked once again. “Say your name at least, so that she’d know whom to call back”.

“Don’t you see the name on the screen?” Chan’s words came out harsher than he planned. “Sorry, whatever. Don’t tell her anything”. Chris hung up the phone and let out an exasperated sigh. Rubbing his face with his hands, Chan couldn’t even comprehend what he was feeling. Why was the mere thought of you and Yugyeom in the same space bringing him the worst pain of it all? It was jealousy. It was all the love he couldn’t properly give you resulting in that horrendous feeling of envy. The feeling that Yugyeom might give this love to you. The love that you deserve.

How long will he continue pining over you? Maybe he should just start paying more attention to his actual girlfriend rather than the dream woman of his?

Taglist:

@heylookwhoitis @amaranth-writing @itstorimf @tenshimara @whyyougottadothatbro

The story's masterlist <3

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aannonn · 5 months

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Tsukasa is such a great father-figure.. Big bro-figure... He's assuring Nene that they can do it. He's telling her that she got this. She can do this!

I love this bonding moment between the two. They are both so precious; they both deserve the world ❤

"Tsukasa is a heartless monster!" "Tsukasa is such a yandere towards Amane. He would for sure kill Nene." "Tsukasa wouldn't care if Nene died, that's for sure."

...Are we reaaaaally talking about the same boy who sacrificed himself for his own brother at the age of 4..? Aaand then sacrificed himself again this time for Nene just so she wouldn't get hurt from the fall...? He couldn't fly, so all he could do was break her fall.

....Yeahhh, I don't think we are talking about the same boy, actually. Are you talking about Tsukasa Tenma? I never watched/played Project Sekai, but I'm sure Tsukasa isn't like this, either... Are you talking about a whole another Tsukasa??

Just now that I noticed that Hanako broke free only Nene.. Leaving Tsukasa out of it... Why..? Why are you giving him the cold shoulder, Hanako?

OOkay now I understand why there were some people in my fyp saying that they 'hate' Hanako now xD

Hm..

...Yeahhh it's probably because of the kiss. lol He's mad. Fair! But poor Tsu, though-

Tsukasa looks so happy as he says this, though.. xD

sigh... Lil' siblings, isn't it. (me; also an lil' sibling)

Akane and Teru!1 The boys!1! Them1!1

...Welp- That was.. an really unexpected surprise, actually.... Not bad!

Aaaaaaaaand here we are. Silently scared for Akane

Teru looks terrifying.. He's so mad xD

Oooh Akane finally managed to defeat Teru! Good for him!

But... In under what circumstances..?

...Woah. Just- Woah.

I wonder what it is like a supernatural court? Is there any jail for supernaturals or something-? HmmMm....

Welp! I think that's it..? xD

Cya ~ !

part 1 of this post!

#jibaku shounen hanako kun #toilet bound hanako kun #jshk #tbhk #tbhk manga #jshk manga #manga spoilers #manga panels #panel analysis #have a good day!#have a good afternoon!#have a good night!#𐡘 𐡘♡

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sisitrip · 8 months

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Welp, I missed day 28 of A.U.gust 2023 (the one day I was excited to do), but life/drama/the humidity that made me enemies with my hair lol kept me from it. But, since ill editing and reading for a bit, my brain wouldn't let me do that until I posted this one. I want to thank @gallavichthings for hosting A.U.gust once again. I only got in two days, but I had fun nonetheless.

With that said, I'm offering "Will Do" with no expectations. (2,082k words)

Housekeeping:

Da: Yes (Russian)

Spasibo: Thank you (Russian)

TW: Mention of scare tactics used against a small child by our most hated sperm donor.

_______________________________

Ian pads into the dining room grappling with a helplessness he hates.

Silent and distressed, Mickey is huddled on their bed recovering from yet another nightmare and there’s nothing he can do to stop them. Nothing.

He paces, futility ushering him to do something, anything to erase the memory of Mickey crying in his arms, scared and curling his toes hard enough to turn them white. Desperate, he’d come out to heat some milk, the only thing he could think to do and it kills him that he can’t do more.

He takes a few angry swings in the dark, hissing “fuck you, fuck you, fuck you” with each jab. He didn’t think his hate for Terry could grow.

“Bad dreams again?”

Ian jumps when Svet seems to materialize out of the shadows of the sparsely lit kitchen. He laughingly sags into a dining room chair, hand on his chest as orange sparks prickle his vision.

“Christ, Svet. You need a bell,” he says, unsteady. “Yeah, third nightmare this month. Night sleeping is still new for him.”

He blinks a few times and the sputtering orange lights finally fade. He needs sleep. He always sees dumb stuff when he’s this tired.

“You fixing Yevvy a bottle?” he asks.

“Da. He will shit again, but we must feed the bottomless pit.”

Ian laughs softly. Yev’s appetite was legendary, a trait Mickey was proud of.

“I’ll go get him. I just came to warm some milk for Mick,” he says, rising.

“Wait!”

He stills at Svet’s sharp tone. The delicate detente they’d reached was fresh and he’s always careful not to upset that balance.

“Did … did I do something, Svet? I know this situation isn’t, I don’t know, ideal. But, we … me and Mickey, we could stay at my place if it makes you-”

“No, that part is okay. It’s just Yevgeny. He sleeps. I thought I would move before air raid alarm,” she jokes, sounding anything but amused as she waves him back into his seat. “I heat milk for the enfant terrible too.”

Ian smiles, relieved he hasn't clumsily ruined the truce he’s fought hard for and won. He takes a deep breath and wrinkles his nose against a warm electric smell he can’t quite place. Like burning metal maybe.

“You were always sweet, Ian. Too sweet for this world you’d lived in with Mickey,” Svet says, rueful and quiet. A stove burner alights with a blue flame as she twists a knob. “But, it was that sweetness that let you accept Yev. What I didn’t know at the time was that you would come to love Yev like I did.”

Ian pauses in rubbing his sleepy eyes. Her past tense is throwing him off, making this moment weirdly surreal. Like an echo from a remembered conversation.

He corrects her gently. “Like you do. Love Yevvy like you do. Here we say “do” for present and “did” for past.”

“What do you say for the future?” she asks.

“Will do.”

“Spasibo.” Svet opens the refrigerator with her back to him. “You took good care of Yev. You were a better caretaker than either of us and I failed him when he’d needed me most. But, you never did. Even when you didn’t know yourself, you made sure he was safe. I’m betting that you'll do it again when he comes looking for you.”

There it is again. The odd use of the past tense. And did her accent just drop entirely?

Despite those disturbing anomalies, Ian’s too distracted by her clothing to focus on them. She’s not dressed in the robe and nightgown she usually favors. Instead she’s wearing some sort of reflective leggings that look metallic and uncomfortable. Her shape is different too. Softer, fuller.

“Failed Yevvy how? And what do you mean when he comes looking for me?" he asks, watching her move slowly to the stove, like her limbs couldn’t respond fast enough.

“Nevermind that.” She sets a milk filled pot on the flames then leans carefully against the refrigerator. “I have to tell you about my Yev. You need to be there for him.”

The dark is doing something strange to her voice. It sounds otherworldly with a slight echo or reverb that gives it a tinny sound. Like a radio playing at night in a distant neighbor's yard. He doesn't know why, but it's freaking him out.

They both jump when a bedroom door opens and they hear Mickey’s footsteps approaching. Jesus, the whole house is spooking him tonight.

“Don’t tell him I’m awake. He’ll get embarrassed,” Svet whispers, slipping to the side of the refrigerator shrouded in darkness.

Mickey pads over, naked save his socks.

His heart aches at the sight of those socks. Tonight is the first time Mickey’s told him why he always needs socks after a nightmare. Ian couldn’t imagine waking up from sleep as a four year old with your father gibbering like a monster under your bed and grabbing your naked toes in the dark. He finally understands why Mickey prefers sleeping during the day and it breaks his heart.

“You comin’ back to bed?” Mickey steps between his legs, squeezing his shoulders.

Ian’s about to warn him that Svet is up, but thinks better of it. She’s seen him naked before.

“Just warming up some milk. You want cinnamon this time?”

He pulls Mickey close by the hips and kisses his sleep warm belly.

“Yeah. But, I’ll make it.”

Ian presses his face into Mickey’s stomach and runs his hands up and down the back of his thighs. He's not quite over Mickey screaming awake like he did. His protective caveman had surfaced with a vengeance.

“No, baby, I got it. Go back to bed. I’ll bring it in,” he mumbles, blowing warm puffs of air into Mickey’s navel, making him chuckle.

“Baby.” Mickey’s soft snort is affectionate as he strokes the back of Ian’s neck. “You only call me that after a nightmare.”

“That’s the only time you’ll let me.” In the dim glow of the streetlight, Mickey’s face is still marked by his dream. Vulnerable and stricken. “I could call you that when we’re in the supermarket if you want.”

Mickey sucks his teeth and runs his fingers through Ian’s hair.

“Let’s try it around here first, alright?” Mickey kisses him. Sweet, precious. “Hurry up. Hate layin’ in there without you.”

Ian lets him go after giving his hips a squeeze.

“I’m right behind you … baby.”

Mickey huffs a soft laugh and kisses his forehead before padding off, leaving him smiling. Yeah. He's going to call him baby everyday.

The clink of a pot against a mug brings him back down to reality. Svet’s pouring the heated milk and he flushes. He’d forgotten about her. Mickey, like always, eclipsed everything around him.

“You teach him to love. That’s good. Needed,” she says, pulling the cinnamon from their meager rack of spices. “Yev will need both of you to know love.”

“He’s taught me a few things too,” he says through a yawn, wanting their Mickey scented bed now more than ever.

“Da. How to be a father without actually being a father. I will be grateful for that later.”

Svet sets the mug on the dining room table and he has a mild shock. She looks … tired. There are lines in her face and her hair must be catching the light weird because it looks silver in some places. And her pajamas. They’re definitely reflective and have panels in the chest and along the arms, almost like protective plating. Crazier still, they’re pulsing with a warm orange light. He blinks hard, leaning forward to get a better look, but she steps back into the gloom of the kitchen.

“Svet, what the hell are you wear-”

“Oh fuck, no. It’s too soon. The cycle’s started. I was supposed to have more time,” she says fast, accent completely gone as she backs up. A warm copper scent begins to suffuse the room. “Listen. Yevvy’s going to come to you, Ian. When he’s 14, he’ll find you. Take him in. Even if Mickey doesn’t want to. Take him in.”

Ian’s heart begins to trip as tiny orange lights flicker around the kitchen. They fizzle to life between him and Svetlana, only to wink out as soon as they appear and are replaced by more. The hot copper smell is strong now, overpowering.

“Svet, what are you talking about? Holy shit, are we having an electrical fire?!” Ian stands and takes a step forward as more sparks of orange light swirls around her. Despite the violence of their appearance, they make no sound.

“Stop! Stay there! The intake will kill you,” Svet warns, backing into a dark corner. “Just take Yev in. He will have no one but you and Mickey until I’m released. Promise me!”

There’s a horde of orange lights swirling along Svet’s body now, illuminating her. What he sees takes his breath away.

Svet’s older. At least 60. Her face is wrinkled and her hair is gray. She’s aged 40 years since yesterday and that’s impossible.

“I agreed to do this only if I could change Yev’s trajectory and this is the moment that triggers you to remember later. We found that your hippocampal storage will retain this specific memory and I need you to hold onto it! Yev needs you to!”

The orange lights surge now, filling the kitchen with an unearthly glow and an odd warmth. Frozen, Ian watches Svetlana fight against an invisible current that seems to be pulling her inward. She speaks rapidly now, as if racing against some unknowable deadline.

“Take him in. His life changes for the better because you do. He won’t get radicalized. I will get to see him again if I survive this. Just help him Ian! Promise me you’ll do it! Say you will do-”

She winks out into a cloud of orange sparks, leaving behind a strong smell of heated copper.

In shock, he responds to her pleas while they still echo in this empty space.

“Will do.”

The air in the kitchen crackles in the silent aftermath and Ian can’t move, sure that what he just witnessed wasn’t real. He’s been under so much stress - living with Mickey and Svet, running out of money, dancing at the club. Add to that the coke he hadn’t told Mickey about, but had needed lately to keep moving. Maybe he needed to cut back like he told Fiona because no fucking way that happened.

“Ian.”

Mickey’s standing in the dining room holding the steaming mug of milk. “What are you doing?”

With a start, he turns away from the dark kitchen. It wasn’t real. It didn’t happen.

“I-I couldn’t remember if I turned off the stove,” he says, soft and uncertain.

“Doesn’t look like it. Turn it off now, it smells a little burnt in here,” Mickey whispers. “C’mon. Let’s go back to bed before you wake Svet.”

Ian turns off the stove and follows him, slowing past Svet’s room. He peeks in and she’s sleeping on the bed holding Yevgeny. He lets out a shaky breath. He’d sleepwalked. It’s happened before. That’s all. Nothing more than that.

“Ian, you better get in here before I finish this milk or you ain’t gettin’ any,” Mickey teases from their bedroom doorway.

He hiccups a disjointed laugh and follows Mickey inside, shaking off the last of whatever that waking dream had been.

In bed, he loses himself in Mickey’s body, emptying him twice, until he’s wet, gaping and emotional. Still unsettled by his waking dream, he seeks stability and an outlet for his need to fix. He finds both in every moan, gasp and soft cry Mickey gives him until he no longer feels adrift. Satiated, they curl around each other and Mickey presses his feet atop Ian’s, body relaxing with this anchor he seems to need. Ian holds him tight and falls asleep, allowing the dream of Svetlana to fade into memory.

He won’t think about this night again.

For exactly fourteen years, he doesn’t even have the vaguest memory of it. But, the day there’s a knock on their Westside apartment door and a blond teenager with Mickey’s eyes says his name is Yev, he instinctively lets him inside.

Later, after they decide Yev should stay, Mickey asks him to make up the couch. Ian smells warm copper before he speaks without thinking.

“Will do.”

#gallavich #gallavich fanfiction #my fic #gallavich fanfic #AUgust 2023

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stnaf-vn · 11 months

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did you really thought I wouldn't send a message myself? >:( Welp too bad for you caus it's not the case! I wanted to say thank you for being a great dev and interacting with others in the community, because some dev don't do what you're doing and that's such a great personnality pf yours ! STNAF is probably the very first VN I'm seriously into...I would say I'm litteraly obssesed with Friend if we forget about the fact that I draw him at least once everyday-. I never was a person who actually dared to ship myself or something like this with a canon character cause always have been scared of peopel judging me and guess this game was the perfect excuse for me to break out a little bit from that fear of mine even thaugh I still prefer to represent myself with an oc. Kinda hilarious how I found this game completly by pure hazard on youtube and then I started to search the twitter of your's and that's how I started to post on twitter lol

I'll be there in the dark still drawing some tiny comics and drawings of your game cause I honestly can't get this blond boy out of my head send help, I'm starting to be scared of myself for it

Sobbing/pos

Thank you for being here and for doing such amazing artwork!! I’m so glad we are friends!!!

And I’m excited for the future of that project you are working on

#🤪 peepaw things

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theflyingfeeling · 8 months

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give up before you suffocate (literally) ✌️

tried to get a doctor's/nurse's apppointment for my throat because it's been aching since Sunday and I haven't been able to speak properly since Wednesday and I can't sleep at night because the pain is unbearable and NOTHING HELPS but the nurse I was talking with online said 'nah just try this painkiller mix and some disinfective tablets and warm honey water' (okay fair enough I haven't tried that) but I don't have those exact painkillers at home and the tablets I've been using haven't done shit so I'd have to go to pharmacy but I'm scared because when I tried to do that earlier today I ended up having to turning back home (the pharmacy is like 50 m from where I live) because I got a terrible coughing fit that brought tears to my eyes and sometimes these coughing fits even alert my gag reflex which kind sucks you know because it's as if I'm about to throw up but nothing actually comes out 💀 but I also can't order the stuff from the online pharmacy that offers consulting online because I've already ordered from them yesterday and today (when my trip to the pharmacy failed) and I'm just too embarrassed to order from them AGAIN?? 😭🙈 (yes this is a problem shut up)

so yeah, when BC said give up before you suffocate I took that personally because lol everytime I try to speak (just to see if I'm able to yet), every other syllable is just wheezing while every other syllable is completely soundless, and I can only speak until I either run out of breath or get a coughing fit, so even if I made it to the pharmacy alive, I'd have to either write down what I need or idk fucking pantomime it I guess 😑 the throat situation is even worse because during the day it doesn't bother me that much because I don't pay attention to it (I can feel the most pain when I swallow) so I THINK it's getting better, but then the night comes and I go to bed and have too much time to focus on the way and how often I swallow and how much more it hurts every time and 😩😩😩😩😩

at least I don't have fever anymore and my leggies haven't been achy since Wednesday, but I've got a runny nose, which is honestly the LEAST of my worries right now, although my right ear being completely blocked because of it is a bit of a bummer (btw is it normal to hear your own pulse in your ear? been too scared to google this ahaha if it's something serious pls don't tell me I want to go swiftly)

welp, since I can't do anything useful like prepare for my upcoming new job (🙃) or write my fic (😭), I'm gonna project the remains of my sanity on rant posts like this I guess lol I hope you enjoyed I'm off to die on my way to the pharmacy now 💅

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sheliesshattered · 1 month

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It's been about two and a half weeks since I posted my update about our trip to Batuu -- and it has been a weird two and half weeks. Shortly after I finished that post, Jack and I found out that our work contract was ending abruptly, effective March 1st. We always knew that was a possibility, and we're difficult to scare at this point, especially when it comes to work stuff, so where that might have filled some people with quite a lot of dread, Jack and I were both just like 'welp, I guess this is happening.'

We knew about a couple of possibilities for new work, but we figured we'd have at least two weeks off in between, just while we got everything lined up. Besides chasing down those potentials for a new contract, we also used the free time to get a bunch of household chores out of the way, things like taxes and taking the car into the shop and then getting it smog tested, going in for eye exams, all the sort of things that are easy to put off during the work week and then not want to do on the weekend.

And in between all that I actually got some sewing done too, lol. Whenever I first wear something that I sewed, I take notes on anything that needs to be fixed or adjusted or changed, and while I was generally happy with my outfit for our Batuu Bounding day, there were a few small things I wanted to fix about it -- both in the hopes of wearing it to Batuu again at some point, and so that the pieces can be worn on their own with other clothing.

For the sweatshirt I sewed to go underneath the blue linen vest, I actually knew what I wanted to change before we went to Batuu, but specifically put off making those changes until after our big Disney day. It was fine under the vest, but without the vest it fit a bit awkwardly: the edge finishing on the collar gaped open and didn't want to lay right, and the side seams flared out too much over the hips.

I ended up trimming the collar edging down to a much narrower width, like I said I might back near the beginning of February. I played around with adding another detail there, maybe a stand up collar just in the back, but in the end decided it looks fine with just that narrow trim.

To fix the flare over the hips, I ended up needing to take out the cool detail on the side seam. Sewing that up as a regular seam allowed me to fiddle with the fit much easier, and it also removed a lot of bulk from those multi-layered exposed seams. It fits under the vest even better now than it did before, and I can wear it without the vest, just with jeans or leggings or whatever.

For the vest, I was generally happy with the fit, but wearing it around all day made it clear just how much I actually needed hooks and eyes to keep the flap over the zipper closed. I went back and forth on how to do the hooks and eyes, contemplated putting them on the outside of the flap before deciding to hide them under the flap instead. I hand sewed several of them down, but then when it was just creating weird bumps and ripples in the center front, I took all of them off except the one right at the underbust.

That one hidden hook and eye was only just barely enough to keep the flap over the zipper from swinging open, so this last week I took off that one hook and eye pair, then started hand sewing them to the outside instead. I placed the one at the underbust first, since that's the most fitted point, then spaced the hooks out along the outside of the overlap at even spacing so that the top one ended up right at the very top corner of the flap.

My first round of sewing on a bunch of these taught me not to try to match up the eyes with the hooks by measurement or by what lays flat on my table, but rather to actually put the vest on and thread an eye through each hook and use tailor's chalk to mark where each eye needed to go. Like the rest of the vest, it absolutely will not lie flat on the table, but it fits me wonderfully, with no ripples or weird bumps along that center front edge.

I ended up really liking the way the exposed clasped looked, and I think it adds a really subtle Star Wars-y type detail. The black hooks and eyes nearly disappear on the dark blue linen (far more than in these well-lit photos), so they end up being just a bit of texture and visual interest rather than yelling about their claspiness.

Most of the time I'll wear it as in the photo above, with the top two clasps undone. The weight of the large metal hooks helps the triangular edge of the undone flap hang properly, which was another problem I had with it during our Batuu visit.

But the design really felt like it demanded a fully functional closure, so I added two more hooks up past the point where they're needed to actually cover the zipper. Leaving just one clasp undone results in a cool, slightly more asymmetric neckline:

And closing it all the way to the top creates a very sleek, buttoned-up kind of look.

I have some ideas about other pieces of clothing that I might be able to pair this vest with, and hopefully an excuse to wear my whole Batuu Bound outfit again in the near-ish future. Either way, I'll get some pictures of the updated vest on me sometime soon.

And since the new contract situation has worked itself out -- Jack and I will officially be back at it with a new client starting this week -- we're contemplating going to one of the Star Wars After Dark dates at Disneyland in April or May. I'll definitely wear the vest then, and possibly the sweatshirt too, depending on the night time temperatures predicted for whenever we end up going.

With that in mind, there's a new stash-busting sewing project I've started as well, but it really deserves its own post. Watch this space.

#my sewing #Batuu Bounding #Batuu vest #Jyn Erso sweatshirt #scrappy sweatshirt #2024 mood #long post

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zuckarr · 1 year

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1 year as a vegan 🌱 an honest overview

I'm a 30 year old woman, and I decided to go vegan in April 2022. I was never a vegetarian. I switched from an omnivorous diet to a plant-based diet overnight, and I have strictly adhered to the latter, with the only few exceptions being accidents.

I would like to write down how my journey as a vegan has been so far, what pros and cons I encountered and how my overall health was impacted. I intend to talk with my heart on my sleeve about everything and I am totally open to questions or clarifications. This post is nothing more than my own subjective, unique experience as a relatively new vegan person. However I won't be talking about the morality of veganism, nor the reasons why I decided to go vegan. I want to give voice to the bodily and mental changes I am going through instead, plus a few personal final thoughts.

I'd like to begin by stating that:

I have been taking several blood tests during the last year in order to keep track of the changes.

I have been taking vitamin B12 supplements as strongly recommended by every single doctor and veganism related website/source.

I have no prior sickness of any kind.

HEADACHES.

Headaches used to permeate my days before going vegan - so much that I had stopped noticing them (when bearable). During my first week as a vegan, the sudden disappearance of my headaches felt like a miracle. I would've never anticipated how life-changing that was. I was so used to my head pounding that the absence of the pain couldn't have gone unnoticed. I figured out I am intolerant to dairy, as countless others are, and yet I used to munch on cheese as my go-to comfort food... as countless others do.

BLOATING.

Bloating was probably also caused by my daily ingestion of dairy products, and was one of my body's cries for help. I did not feel bloated anymore once I started eating plant-based. The skin on my belly was softer at the touch and not as tense as before. People around me began asking if I had lost weight. I hadn't. It was just me deflating, lol.

SLEEP.

This is one of the most unexpected changes: I noticed I've been sleeping less, but better. I started waking up an hour or two earlier than usual, feeling well rested. Thanks to that, my days got longer, my mind got clearer, and my mood improved almost instantly.

ENERGY.

During the first weeks, I felt very energised. Must've been all of the vitamins suddenly filling my body! Who needs to get high when you can get the iron rush from a bunch of spinach, like good old Popeye taught us? Nevertheless, the energy sort of dissipated over time and I've been feeling pretty normal ever since.

POOP.

Oh no, it's poop talk! Fend yourselves, because I am not scared of being descriptive here. Long story short, I used to have frequent diarrhea before going vegan. Once again, my dairy intolerance most likely contributed to creating funny looking brown stuff. If I asked you how's your poop looking, what would you answer (assuming you wouldn't slap me)? And would you know what a healthy poop is supposed to look like? Welp, let's just say I've been proud of my toilet appointments since going vegan, because all I see are Pacha meme worthy sausages. Going to the loo is a happy time now, in comparison to the long minutes of agony spent with stomachache and funky smells.

FLATULENCE.

Can't have booty talk without mentioning the #1 cause of laughter among kids since the beginning of time! Farting is funny, but it is first and foremost the sign of a healthy gut. It takes a quick Google search to find out what farts truly are and why our bodies need to produce them. I confirm one of the most innocent prejudices against vegans - yes, we fart more than usual! But if you read into it, you'll only wish to do the same. Still, it is a largely acceptable change, and has not caused me any discomfort or unfortunate situations whatsoever.

CHOLESTEROL, IRON, PROTEIN, ETC.

Before going vegan, I had high cholesterol, high fibrinogen, low hemoglobin, low albumin, and a few other things that weren't importantly unbalanced. As aforementioned, I've taken several blood tests during the last year which showed ALL of the highs & lows quickly going back to normal. When I saw my cholesterol lower for the first time, I cried. I haven't had normal cholesterol for years, so, seeing that was nothing less than a miracle for me. As for my iron and protein, they increased! My fibrinogen was REALLY high, which could've resulted in a heart attack due to a vascular occlusion, but I don't risk that anymore. I cannot express how ecstatic I am to be considered medically healthy now. I wish somebody had told me earlier about the health benefits of a plant-based diet.

COOKING AND GROCERY SHOPPING.

I was never a big fan of cooking, because I was mostly just hungry all the time and I couldn't be bothered to prep meals or to even chop up vegetables. As a vegan though, I was kind of forced to look at recipes in the beginning - I was pretty lost and didn't know what to cook! Well, vegan cooking turned out to be much easier than I thought. I remember my first vegan grocery shopping experience: a whole new world opened up in the mall. I had never looked at the veggies and fruits and legumes and seeds and cereals section properly before! It was ENORMOUS! Boxes and bags and baskets of wonderfully colored food, most of it really cheap (especially legumes); with half of the money that I used to spend on cheese and meat, I had double the amount of food in my shopping cart and I was so ready to start cooking. The more I cooked, the quicker my cooking skills drastically improved and I have so much fucking fun in the kitchen now! I made countless vegan meals and cakes, loved by everybody (non-vegans asked for recipes more than once!), even by my mother! She used to slaughter chickens and had never baked a cake without eggs before, and yet, she admitted that this way of eating is fantastic and convenient. After a few months, she praised my hair and skin because it looks brighter and healthier. As a matter of fact, I feel nourished and full most of the time. Most importantly, I began to feel grateful and to think of food as a way of loving myself and nurturing my body, rather than a mere matter of taste.

SOCIETY.

The problem with being a vegan in a human society is... other people. It is always, undoubtedly other people who will come @ me with their weird, uncalled for, and rude anti-vegan claims as soon as somebody ELSE reveals that I am a vegan. I swear to god. I have no idea where we picked up the scenario of the 'annoying vegan' because the truth is actually the opposite... it is others who annoy ME... whenever they asked questions, I was happy to answer and explain stuff, because I genuinely thought that they were interested and would have liked learning something new, just like I would've felt if they had talked to me about something that they are passionate about. But nope, the real reason why most people asked me questions was to 'debunk' what I would say and feel like they won the argument. Even though it wasn't an argument at all. It wasn't long before I started noticing the patterns, the same old questions asked, the same rebuttals, over and over, in an endless cycle of going nowhere. So I simply learned how to differentiate the 'gotchas' from the rare, decent people who truly want to know more about veganism. As for going out and eating out, it wasn't as hard nor as expensive as I anticipated. We now live in a very vegan friendly time, there are vegan alternatives to basically everything. I feel extremely lucky to be a vegan now, because I can't even begin to imagine how hard it would've been years before.

PEACE OF MIND.

There is a duck pond nearby and I often take walks through it. Sometimes I sit on a bench, look at the beautiful birds and their dreamy plumage, and I... appreciate them. Not for their meat, like I used to. I can't even fathom seeing those creatures as food now. I appreciate them as individuals, who dream, love, dance, think, sleep, bond with their kin... I feel at peace with animals and nature on a whole other level. I realized how wrong it felt to eat a steak and then pet my dog. I learned so much about animal agriculture, nutrition, human rights, environmentalism… and I have so much more to learn yet. It takes one heartfelt glance into an animal's eyes, to be reminded that we are all the same. I am honored to get to choose not to be cruel to them.

#vegan #veganism #go vegan #use your hearts and brains #be kind to all kinds #veg 🌱#personal

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dreamg0rly · 1 year

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hi lol 👋

so, a couple days ago i made a post saying i going on a break to enter the void. welp, that didn't happen. i came back to tumblr and started overconsuming content on here. that being said, i want to enter the void. my mindset is great (not that you need it for the void cause it's just meditation but yk), i want to go, but i've been scared and i've been stalling to enter for so long. being on tumblr and overconsuming didn't help me at all. so, im gonna take an indefinite hiatus to work on entering the void. i don't know how long i'll be gone but im gonna delete tumblr and work on myself. hopefully i'll come back with a success story! i love you all and i hope your doing amazing. see you later!

#manifestation #loa tumblr #manifestation blog #void state #law of assumption #the void state #void state success story #loa #neville goddard #overconsumption

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kiwibirb1 · 5 months

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To preface this, I completely and utterly forgot I was doing this. This is roughly what I remember, but it will start kind of random. This is a continuation of this post

My thoughts as I play Twilight Princess for the first time Pt 2

IT FUCKING SLAPPED ITS ASS DURING A FIGHT

Aww I can't see Rusl

Where the fuck am I supposed to go

HYRULE FIELD? HOW LONG HAS THIS BEEN HERE?

*Sprints across grass*

Lol I bet one of the kids shit themselves and that's what I'm smelling

Kakariko!

Aww that's so sad and sweet! They think I'm gonna save them! *proceeds to run into wall*

WHERE THE FUCK AM I SUPPOSED TO GO

Ahah!

Wait I got them all didn't I?

Oh there's some outside Kakariko

Can Midna please fucking stop looking behind like theres something there it scares me

Death Mountain? I don't think this fur will stand the heat.

Gordon!

Song?

WHERE THE FUCK AM I

Ooh other wolf ( I know it's Time but whatever)

I'm not very good at howling

That sounded so pretty!

Ooh he's in Ordona

Lol just got ragdolled by air

Four this time? Eeugh

Oh that was easy

Um why does it sound like this volano is about to blow?

AHHHHHHH

These fucking bird things

OW RUDE ROCK

Woah I'm glowy

She just casually twirls out of existence

Hoo-Hoo

Why does it have a fish mouth. Ew

Aww poor Colin or whatever his name is

Haha he runs weird

Bomb guy just ignored

Woah music change

Gorons, why?

Ooh I like this Kakariko's music

Oh right I blew a house up... oopsie

I got a shiny ant!

Welp I guess I gotta talk the gorons

HOW THE FUCK AM I SUPPOSED TO STOP THIS GUY

WHAT IS BEEPING

Oh my hearts

I give up ill go to the Wolf instead

AHHHHH

WHY THE FUCK WHERE YOU STANDING RIGHT WHERE I GET OUT

EPONA

IM A COWBOY

YEE HAW

zoom

I CANT FUCKING JUMP THIS GATE

FINALLY

Not the mailman

Aww he did a little "doo do-do do do!"

There's two bird people face things? Eugh *shudders*

Lol I just ran them over

Oh thanks Epona that qas the wrong way

Doggo!

Okay now that I know how to bash peoples heads in with a shield Onwards, Epona!

Yeah, yeah, your kids are alive, lemme buy some milk!

Link: looks down Mayor: ah, so you like mayonnaise with your pizza, not cheese.

Ah what is that walk

Lol he had to bandage his old man knees

I figured out the secret: smack em

So the only way to win.. is to cheat. I'm in!

Where's Rusl?

Oh well

Hehe I stole my own money

Over the gate first try baby

NOT THEM AGAIN

Noo Colin

How are a bunch of pigs faster then Epona

I'm so good at jousting

YO THAT POSE WAS EPIC

Why does this sound like a death speech

He's just ragdolled lol

Epic pose: check Someone's death to avenge: check Horse the Fandom loves more then the main character: check

When you just buy the hylian sheild:

Lol this kid running the shop tho

IM BACK GORON PREPARE TO FACE DEFEAT

Get rekt

Lol they just continue going down

Being!

Fuck I forgot the boots

One sec

*Does a cheat*

Wow that's a lot of lava

The lava is very hot 0/10 do not recommend

Okay so I hyperfocused the rest of the dungeon but I did write one thing:

OMFG ITS THE WEIRD BIRDBPERSON FACE THING RUNNNN

I got about halfway through the dungeon, expect another TP post in the next couple of days!

#twilight princess #goron #goron mines #loz #first playthrough

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zaraevee · 1 year

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Zara watches Trek: TOS Episode 1:

The Man Trap

I’m going to do a new thing!

I originally wrote this down for my Trek-obsessed bestie @clinttbartton and didn’t intend to post it but I saw @noitsbecky127 do a similar thing and realized I could share it with everyone here even tho i’ve never done something like this before (and even if no one else cares, its a cool record for me)

To preface this let me say: before starting this I had a vague idea of who Kirk & Spock were because of pop culture and knew the names of some of the other main bridge crew. I knew almost nothing about the format of the show. I grew up watching Doctor Who (including some of the older stuff when my Dad persuaded me) so a lot of the obvious “60’s” stuff wasn’t completely alien to me (pun intended) but a lot of the Trek stuff was completely foreign as you will see

This is pretty long but here we go!

Point 1? What kind of date is that?

Spock’s in charge? Huh that’s unexpected

Ah Kirk narration~

Do all of them start with exposition? That’s a tried-and-true plot device and its kinda cool

Damn ok Kirk the ladies man

Who’s the third guy? (I was referring to the red-shirt)

I hate the shirt uniforms they look so flimsy and ugly

The music is definitely giving weird vibes to everything lol

Wait tf the lady looks different? For all of them?? Or just him?

Well the third guy’s probably going to die

Yess the iconic intro!

Ah so it is all 3 of them seeing a different one (edit after finishing the episode: this is a weird misleading thing because it implies its in their minds instead of a physical change that the others would also see… maybe its both? I could give it the benefit of the doubt)

Well he’s salty! (edit: LMAO perfect word choice)

He’s hiding something…

She definitely killed him

Lmao she’s (Uhura’s) flirting? with Spock? or just teasing him

Wow he just shut that right down

I wonder how long the crew’s been together

Is McCoy southern? I thought I heard a little bit of accent

They needed SALLLT!!

Bones is his nickname right?

Yes he CAN “just beam down” that’s his job

Was that prop supposed to be bread? Lol looked very fake

Oop he disappeared quick

“I’ve got salt” wtf

Its like he’s calling a wild animal

Oh shit more dead starfleet people

Oh fuck its *their* men

Why bring more people down?? Why would you do that??

SHAPESHIFTER???

Well answer them, you’re gonna get caught if you don’t act the part!

The little smirk that was actually good, I could see the female actress making that face

Well now its on the ship good job Kirk

Welp everyone in the elevator’s dead

Oh guess not

That poor blonde lady (Yeoman Rand) these guys are all creeps!

Ooh this room is fun

Its Sulu!!

I like this pink plant lol

Nooo Sulu be careful don’t let it get you!

Oh it just wants the salt lmao

Pink plant to the rescue? Or just scared?

“Gone Space happy”?? Lol

I like her she’s just got a powerful presence (referring to Uhura)

Ah creepy changed again!

Very presumptuous kick his ass girl!

Ooh speaking in a different language I like that

Gurl you in danger get awayyyyy!!

What’s her name? Ohura? Ahura?

These actors for the shapeshifter are doing a great job tho

Lol he snacking (my first thought was it looked like a sour patch kid lol)

Ooh what’s that uniform? Very spacey

Be carefulllll guys

Nooo leave Bones alone!

Oh yeah smart just let her in

Yeah because putting the doctor to sleep in the middle of a crisis where people are dying is a great idea!!

Referring to yourself in third person- very alien entity

Is she going to pretend to be him???

Ahhhh she didd

That’s actually really smart because as the doctor you can explain any death and make it not your fault!!

Kirk and Spock on a mission together here we go~

The professor’s just letting them find out??

Oh shit he shot at them… that was a lot

“Phasers on stun” is from Star Trek??!

Yep the ship is secured … EXCEPT ITS IN THE CONTROL ROOM NOW

Kirk belly crawling lmao

Ok Spock IS kind of attractive I guess I get it

Oh YES boys good job!

He just let the creature who killed his wife stay with him and protected it because it was the last one?? What the actual fuck

Kirk’s got that smart face on

I feel like he knows Bones well enough to know something’s up

Ooh Kirk’s intimidating I like it! He’s an angrier boi than I expected

Yes Spock is smart- don’t leave them alone!

But ofc now its him against two yikes

Yep that’s what I thought

Aww he ran there

Green blood! that’s right!

Oh wow it killed him too

Welp that’s that its just the creature now

Yay for Spock not being human

Kirk vs Bones oooh

“Oh shit!” (I actually said this out loud when they started fighting physically, I didn’t expect Star Trek to have physical violence for some reason)

Yeah she isn’t done CLEARLY

Jeez second instance of grabbing someone’s hand that has a gun in it that’s so DANGEROUS guys come on

Protective Spock!!

Oh SHIT he’s actually using violence! I didn’t expect that!

I know its a genderless creature but smacking a woman like that is giving me some Yikes vibes

I think you’re traumatizing Bones

Ooh she smacked him back!

But.. you proved your point

Ooooh real monster revealeddd

AUGH its ugly and fake looking

Oh jeez you ok Kirk?? That was quite a scream!

Aww poor Bones :(

I wonder what the different colored shirts mean?

Fondly comparing a killer alien to buffalo is just weird. Are buffalo extinct in present day? I should know this.. I hope they’re not

Do their windows look out the back?? That would be trippy af to ride backwards at Warp

End thoughts:

Yeah ok that wasn’t a fantastic episode but it was tolerable and i’ve seen worse

Introduced the gang!

tho had a few quite questionable scenes with the ladies (almost all of them now that I think about it) except with Uhura and even she was hit on creepily)

Is Spock the only man on this ship who respects women?? Come on! But he just seems respectful in general

Relatively simple plot, but drawn out like old Who always was

Script was ok, not noticeable either way (bad or good)

Tbh I think the creature looked better than early Who monsters so they get credit for that!

~~~~~~

So there you have it! My first forray into Trek documented! At the time of writing this, i’ve watched a few episodes of DS9 (the first few + Distant Voices because I love Bashir) and TNG (I think i’m in love with Data) and a few more of TOS (2-4 and Piece of the Action) as well as half the episodes of Star Trek Continues (White Irises made me fucking cry so hard and I haven’t even seen the episodes it was based on!)

(I didn’t do this for 2-4 or the others but I could absolutely go back and watch those in a while and i’m sure I’d remember what I was thinking!)

If you read this far you’re crazy and thank you! This is honestly mostly for me :)

#star trek #star trek tos #commentary #live-writing #because I refuse to say live tweeting #the man trap #liveblogging #i guess

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